Icebound | Ep. 1 | The Southward Gambit
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Welcome to Legends of Avantris. I'm Derek Hudson and you're listening to Icebound. 89 days. 89 days since you were all captured and imprisoned. A little more than three months by the calendar you all share. 89 days on the outskirts of the river city of Wuzei, the largest urban center of southwest Yulong.

89 days confined in the sweltering heat of the Wuzan labor camp you now call home. 5,287 days left to go. Serving your 16-year sentences for crimes you were unjustly framed for.

Sixteen years, stolen, imprisoned in the golden egg. The brazen name given to the quarry and camp you've come to know over the past three months. Sixteen years gone, but still yet to endure. It's hard to say what's worse. The brutal, foul, cruel conditions. The exhausting drudge of each day's work. The blistering heat that infuses even the isolated night.

or the shared glimpses of your peers, desperate and hopeless. A few simple innovations have made the Golden Egg as inescapable as it is profitable for its other governors. There are no cells, at least not in the traditional sense. Macquarie is dug down layer by layer. So too are the fresh holes mined into the damned and stony earth. As many holes as there are inmates.

Sweating and sleeping until a rope is thrown down the following morning. And an impassable alarm system forms the perimeter of this mammoth hole that is now your dwelling. Guard geese.

territorial, vigilant, spitting, hissing, biting, and wholly unbribable. Guard beef supplement the usual security layers one might come to expect of such a place. Hopelessness, it would seem, is not without a sense of humor. And so it is on this day, the 89th day, you awaken to find yourself wondering again, not just how you came to be here,

but how you might survive. Let's all make a survival check. Ooh. All righty. My first roll of campaign. I'm going to roll with the die. I'm also using my Kimma die. Same, same. Oh, big money. You said perception? Survival. Oh, perception. Survival. Survival. 18 total. Thank you, Kimma.

22. Nice. 13. 20 to 25. 20. Oh, sorry. 22. Some weird initiative thing going on. I think Yorneir beat me. 22, yeah. Yeah, I got an 18. I got a 20. So Yorneir Barnabus. Thank you. I can listen to my players. Then... I got a 30.

- 13. - That scrim, what'd you get, Taishan? - Oh, I got a 13 as well. - Well, I would like to go first. - You could survive better than me. You survive better than I would. I don't do well in prison. - Kimma said, "Did you not get the box with the cup?"

I did not see one. You guys handed me this stuff. Oh, is there another box? Okay. You're kidding me. Did you tie Shannon in on top? You have to. We saw the box, but we didn't know who it was for. We just had a coffee break. That was a lot. We'll open it real quick. All right, everyone.

I'm exhausted. Where could that possibly be? Well, sorry, guys. It's past my bedtime. I'm going home. Box? I have no idea what you mean. Oh, this? Oh, my God. He's got a knife on him? Listen. You need to be great in prison. Let me see. Let me see. Let me see. I'm sure that that would work. That's a nice little knife. Is that against the TOS? No. I don't think so. No, it's a work knife. It's got a wolf on it.

- Oh, that's scary. - That's pretty cool. Inside you there are two wolves. - They're both dead. - Oh, it's a box of paper! - Oh, yay! - And a cup! - I mean, I did say the box with a cup in it, so I kinda looked like, what? - Oh, hang on, hang on. Hold my eyes. - Is it a cup?

It looks like it might be. It's hard to tell, and it's wrapped. But Kim did say the box with a cup in it. Oh, there are multiple cups! One for you! Beautiful teacups. Those are really nice. It's like inscribed. Yeah, that's amazing. I know this is for Mace. You're hefty. I know this is for Mace, but I'm going to steal this. Hey, give my paper back. Are you kidding me? This is the first gift I've received. Why are you sticking paper

paper in a bag. Because it's a prop now. It's a prop. Whatever. Absolutely unimaginable. My mace is knife, apparently. Oh, you are? I thought that was the dildo.

Yikes. Just odds to reach under there. Oh, no, no. Hold on. Oh, the copper. You can drink hot or cold out of these. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

In fact, you all die in prison. Yay! It truly was a survival campaign. I'm in the emergency room. I think I severed an artery. Friday night energy is a different... It really does. It really does.

Jesus. Come on, real. Yes, okay. You're in here. It's the 89th day and you find yourself at the bottom of a hole. You've been in similar holes. This one you've been in for perhaps four, five days. Things are starting to blend together.

How do you have felt about this time and a camp, knowing what you know, with no possibility of a speak? What goes through Jornir's mind as the morning approaches? I think, are we doing character voices or are we just gonna kinda... You get to just decide how you want to enter the session yourself. It's a player choice. Do it, Rich.

I'll be speaking to myself. How many days has it been? 89. It's been several many times where it's been. There's a lot going on. Sorry. 89 days in this hole. But what is 89 days over the course of centuries? This is the way, the land. This is the path I'm on in 16 years is...

Just a simple drop of water. Greater scheme of things. I'll do my duty here and then move on. At that moment, as you are still processing, a rope dangles down through the hole and you hear a voice. Hey, Yornir, get up here! All right. Warden wants you. And I lumber up the rope.

You're able to pull yourself up without issue. Here, you're wanted with the warden. I know you just told me. You make your way up and circle the quarry as you approach the warden's tower. And very quickly, you find yourself in a holding cell. All on your own, the door clangs to a shut and you find yourself waiting, wondering what the warden or whomever could possibly want.

Do I have any of my old possessions on me? That is a great question. The answer is you have none of your possessions, with the exception of the rags that they give you. Part of the process of being entered into this labor camp was that they took your things and sorted them away for when and if you ever should make your way free back into the world of Evantris. Okay.

- So if I have nothing on me, I would literally just sit. If there's like a bench or something, I would just sit down and kind of just hang my head and wait for time to pass. - Time passes. And at the same time, Barnabas, you find yourself at the bottom of a hole. How have you been processing this time in the Golden Egg?

What kind of hard labor am I doing? - Oh, it's been a mix of things. Cutting rocks, crushing rocks, moving rocks, hauling rocks. And then there's another job where they mix the water in with the rocks and create some sort of a slurry. So pushing into the rocks and mixing rocks, moving the slurry, hauling the slurry up and down the steep sides of this quarry.

I'd probably be like humming. I would have made my up a shanty probably for each of the exercises to either hum to myself just to kind of keep in time. And I haven't had my shell in 89 days. That's right. I am not happy. And so... I imagine that you probably would have been very...

frustrated by that at the beginning. And you're not getting used to it, but your ability to continue to fight the guards is weakening. Yeah, and I'll be thinking to myself, and maybe like muttering to myself, 89 days away from her or something I don't even remember doing. 89 days without a drop of rum. We suppose there's

A bit of a coincidence there, probably not related. 89 days, just 16 years until I see her again. - The hole is starting to brighten just above you and as you are seeing the morning sky start to light up, what was the night sky, a rope dangles down. It's a little early for that sort of thing, you hear a voice. - Barnabas!

You're on it! Zorch wants you! Alright. Come on up! I know I have trouble there. I'm coming right up, right away.

You're able to make yourself up, surprisingly nimble despite your frame, and you make the same journey. You don't see Jornir. This is 15, 20 minutes have passed at this point, but you do make yourself to the same warden's tower, and you are not surprised, but surprised to see him.

I say not surprised because you guys have been in the same quarry as all the other people you were with together. However, it's been a rare situation where you've been on the same rock hauling team or crew or gang or what have you. But you see him on the other side of the bars. You join him on the other side, on the same side of those bars and the

barf slam home. You find yourself in the same cell together, looking at each other for the first time in a private place for perhaps a few weeks, maybe more. Mr. Yornear. Hello, mob one. What's mob these days? Madness comes in many forms, Mr. Yornear. Are you still unlucky with your hair? I don't like being standing at the edge of the corner, at the corner of the cell.

I still don't know what you mean when you say my hair has to do with fate, or even luck. Why do you think that? That's why we were all here. We just changed your hair color, shaved it all off. You believe that we are imprisoned because of my hair color. No, I don't believe that. No, that's very wrong. I know that to be true. My hair color is my hair color. Nothing you do or I do will change that.

Eventually, if you never said, just don't step foot on any more vessels, is all I'm saying. And I'll be kind of like...

I'll be giving him a side eye. You're giving him a side eye and you guys are sharing an uncomfortable silence or an uncomfortable conversation or two at the same time that this is happening. Grim, you're finding yourself waking up in the bottom of a hole. How have you been enjoying these last 89 days? It hasn't been going very well, let me tell you. Okay. I would have been very, very quickly losing my mind. Um,

You mentioned that I would have seen my companions at least a little bit here and there, right? Absolutely. At every single chance that I would have had, I would have tried to give them some crazy harebrained scheme to get the fuck out of here. All right? It's been 89 days. That's 88 days too many. You should have been out of here night one. You may have even attempted a few. Oh, I absolutely attempted a few. You found yourself in a particularly deeper hole that evening. It's been not good. I do as little work as possible to get by every single day.

I don't work. I don't work for anything. I've never worked for a single thing in my life. And I don't intend to start now. So needless to say, I'm at the bottom of this hole and I'm with whatever tools and implements I have instead of actually doing the work, I'm drawing more plans in the bottom of the hole, in the rock wall, trying to think of something because I don't do well in captivity. Look, I've been in prison a few times, but there's never been a prison on non-adventures that's held scrim for very long. I can think of two additional reasons why you might be panicked in this situation.

Well, yeah. I mean, well, I mean, maybe me, but, you know, okay. There's really nowhere for me to run. All right. That's all I'm saying. That too. I, you know, I'd like to see the outside at some point again. But also I haven't really been able to go anywhere and I've been stuck in one place for far too long. That's a, it's a good point.

Exactly right. That's exactly right. And as you are looking up at the hole, seeing through the glimmer of light and it's casting down, you are trying as hard as you can not to look at the walls. No matter how wide or shallow or narrow your hole might be, the evening's...

The evenings, especially close to midnight, sometimes you see airbites. No, no, no, no, no, no, it's just a dream. And so it's a very welcome sight when you see that uncoiled rope fall down. I climb up like grease. Scream, you're, oh, oh, you're here already. Get me out of the hole. God, it's a hell hole. What, what do you want? Warden Zorch wants to see you. Oh, oh, this, this is it. This must be it. Get me out of the hole.

Take me, take me, take me! You very briskly walk, perhaps even in front of the guard, making your way to the same prison cell. And you see two people that you maybe consider your friends or companions. At the very least, you shared the experience that led to your arrival at the Golden Egg. Oh, oh my, oh!

You're here. Bonobos. Oi, Captain Scabberscoach. It's been, uh, I don't even know how many days. Listen, okay, I know the last one didn't go very well, but this one, this one's gonna be better. I knew you would have a plan. It involves a giant balloon. All right. I don't know where we're gonna get the balloon yet.

You always have the best plan. Up and out. No, I admit that the last one was not my best plan, but this one. This is the one. This is the one. And I look a little crazed and unhinged. I am completely like 100% all in on whatever he has to say. We just gotta find a balloon. We just gotta find a balloon. We just gotta find a balloon.

Find a balloon. And then I basically go sit against the wall and I'm like rocking, like... Like the ones that are flying the big ones. Yeah, like the big ones. Like the big ones. Yeah, uh-huh. Uh-huh. It's fine. We're out of here before midnight. Do you plan to shoot down the balloon or perhaps make one? Please, don't air. I'm thinking. I don't need... No questions. I'm thinking. Let the captain speak. You were in here.

Don't bring your bad luck over, smart thinking! Do you think that maybe this is... that there are three of us, the ones that were all brought in together, that first day? Is this a coincidence or is it fate?

Well, yeah, if the balloon doesn't work, then clearly they're just going to let us go. That must be what it is. We have at least... Maybe we're all coming here because Captain Scabbers Stabberscotch came up with an idea to break us all out finally. It's the balloon. Yeah, this is the one. This is it. This is the one. This is the way. I don't think that there's any bad luck for stepping on a balloon. I don't think that is proper told one way or the other. Queenie.

As you are left alone, of course, the guard comes, makes his way down and you have the morning of brief respite while you're awake but not working to think about the last 89 days and what they meant to you, how you've been feeling, how you process that. I am lying in the bottom of the hole. I've got my two bunny feet up on the edge of the hole and I'm whistling a song to myself while I'm staring up into the sky.

I'm just hanging in there like a hare and a biscuit. Hare, I wonder if that's spelled H-A-R-E or H-A-I-R. You know, I never did ask, Gold Bear Jenkins. I don't know how I'm going to get these seeds all over a vantress if I'm stuck in this hole, and I tried to hop out of it at least five or six times. It gets lonely in here without my bees. Hare, H-A-R-E.

I guess I could draw in the dirt again. The familiar sight of a rope with knotted

Yes. Am I hallucinating or is that a them there rope? Queenie. That's me. Queenie March. Warden Zoris wants to see you. Who? Warden Zoris. Have I met him before? Never mind, hold on. And I'm going to start climbing up the rope. Have I met him before? When you were process, when you were brought in here. Oh, did he like me or did he not like me? He doesn't like anybody. Oh, right.

- Pestering the guard with questions, eventually you make your way to the same holding cell. You recognize three of these faces and when you find yourselves on the other side of the bar, you were able to say-- - Oh, well look at y'all, I ain't seen y'all, you fellas, since you were knee high to the grasshopper. - Queenie, it's good to see you. I got under the plane, I was just telling the guys. - We're gonna steal a balloon. - Yeah, big balloon, it's gonna fly right out of here. - All right, how are we gonna do it?

I'm thinking. Don't ask me questions. Well, if I don't ask you questions, then we're gonna figure out how we're gonna do it. There is no balloon and no plan for acquiring a balloon. Are you being a Debbie Downer again, Yornir? No, I'm not being a Downer. I think that he's just bringing his bad luck here. Why do you keep talking about his bad luck? The more you talk about it, the more bad luck he's gonna have. You know what they say. Is that how that works? Yeah, if you mention it, then all of a sudden the bad luck appears.

You know, the more you think about it, the more you avoid it. You know what to do. No, I don't think it works that way. Taishan, how do you spend time in a place like this? What is, uh, what goes through your mind as you wake up and start to realize the permanence of the place you find yourself in? Uh, I think I'd be thinking along the lines of, um,

I don't know what purpose the great dragon had for me here on my quest, but what I do know is if we turn the slop counterclockwise, the slightly faster speed, I think we can make some of the best rock slop for the warden.

they've ever seen. I really think we can increase the quality. - Even in this space, they're thinking of ways to help. - Increasing the quality of the brew they were created. I think that my family would never deal in Sumpar brews.

With that, Rope cascades down from the hole above you. It's nearly like full morning now. The sun is finally starting to rise and that dark blue color of the sky is turning the color of day and you hear her voice. Daishin! Yes? Come up!

I'll be right there. I'm not very good at climbing. Okay, I'm coming. I climb up the rope. You're able to make your way. It's notched in even spaces, and so you have footholds in order to eventually pull yourself up. As soon as you get to within reach, a hand pulls you by the collar and tugs you along, making your way up the

coiled road of the golden egg quarry until you find yourself in the warden tower and there you find four people you recognize immediately four people who helped or at least were with you when you were imprisoned or sentenced to this 16 years sentence

and you find yourself alone in a prison cell with them. Friends! Look at it! It's our friend Taishin! How is your imprisonment going? Taishin, you're just a dragonborn I've wanted to see. You've arrived at the perfect moment. The other friends here have pointed out that my giant balloon idea was absolutely ridiculous, and so I've come up with another plan. You can just polymorph us into giant geese.

and we'll match it with the guards. How are they gonna stop us from a giant geese? Well, he's really smart, Captain Scarlet. Just polymorph us, we'll bust through the cage. Scrim, I love your plans. Remember the last one when you tried to bribe the geese? That was hilarious. They said they were unbribable and there you were. Well, it turns out that I don't really know what geese like. Or how to speak geese. Turn us into geese. Yeah, okay. Here we go.

Are you geese? I don't think so. What do you mean? You're the one who knows the magic. You have to know how to turn us into...

Polymorph. Have we ever seen him turn anyone into giant geese? He could turn us into giant geese. Don't you think we would have been out here much sooner? No, I just came up with a plan. He's Dragonborn. He's Magic Dragonborn. It's true. I'm a Magic Dragonborn. All right. We do not need a plan. This is not coincidence. It's clear.

to me that Scrim is as nervous as a cat in a room full of rocking chairs, so we need to be asking someone else how we're going to deal with this situation. We don't need a plan. I wish we had a cat here right now. We should believe in fate. What? Trust fate. What? And I climb up on Yorneir and I plant my feet on his shoulders and I'm pulling on his hair as I get right in his face and I say, we don't need a plan. I don't intend to die in here, Yorneir.

I'm not gonna die here! And I jump off. You will not die in here. What are the chances that the five of us again would end up in one room?

The universe. I'm not very good at math, so I can't answer that. I have seen the weird. What? I have seen the weird. The weird what? You've seen something weird? No, no, the weird. In the quarry? No, it is spelled W-Y-R-D. You're the perfect person for me to ask this question to. They're homophones. Okay.

Wait, what? That means sounds the same. Okay, so I have to ask you, is it spelled H-A-I-R or H-A-R-E? It depends on the context of the word. If a hair is stuck in a biscuit, is it H-A-R-E like me or H-A-I-R like me?

or like what's on top of your head? That's a good question, Miss March. Well, I suppose are you eating the biscuit? Oh, I don't know, I'm stuck in the biscuit. You would be stuck in the biscuit, and then that would impact the spelling, is my understanding. That's why I'm asking. We can make a shit biscuit big enough for you to get sticking if you'd like, Miss March. Oh, I don't want to be in a, nevermind. Lots of flour, though, you need lots of flour along with a balloon.

What for? I thought we didn't need a balloon anymore. You also need a rising agent. A balloon is a stupid idea. I thought you were just going to polymorph us into geese and we're going to fly out of here. The great dragon imbued me with many powers. I thought that I did, but so far all I've been able to do is shoot fire. Yep, that's correct. Do you hear that? Do you hear that?

You do hear the sound of muffled voices on the other side of the door that leads into this room with the holding cell that you find yourselves in. And making a perception check, you might be able to perceive what's happening with those voices. I'm gonna use this d20. Oh, hot fire today. Hot fire with Chima's die. 15. 15 as well.

I got higher than that, I think. Oh, okay. This fucking guy, pretty sure. 22, 22. Oh, okay. Fuck. 22. Well, did you get higher than a 22? You open this. Oh, I thought you were role-playing. You wanna try some of the-- All right, don't! Spaghetti on my sweater already. Mom's spaghetti. Scream's got sweaty hands, spaghetti. Oh, joy.

What is that? Eagle, right? Sponsored by? What did you get? Oh, I got a 14. Oh, okay. I'll say that. I got a 14. Because you all have become very sensitive to the goings-ons and the golden egg, you hear these footsteps before you hear the voices, and immediately, whatever topic of conversation drops, and you... These are the ones you requested, yes. These are the ones you requested, yes.

Good, good, good. And I can go and see them? Do we recognize that voice? Make a insight check. Good question. Insight is the...

Yes, the first voice that you hear is Warden Zoris. Oh, okay. But you do not recognize the second voice. It sounds, even in that indistinction, you're able to, with your massive ears, pick up on the subtleties of Timber. They're reasonably sized. They're moderately, like, average. Proportionate to her body. Proportionate to my, I mean, what rabbit folk are like.

You hear the same voices, and so I can go inside.

Yes, if you please. So that one's the warden. This is the warden. I'll do warden and then I'll do the other warden. I was going to do something like, I'll derange this one, Jackson! Just to make sure. Oh, really? Sorry, Derek, I just want to know. I love this hard course.

I knew it was over. No, it's fine. We'll see you eventually, I'm sure. This is a conversation to accelerate things, it's just that the anonymous voice is requesting to see you, and it becomes clear that the Warden seems to think that their transaction is complete, and that he's free to see you as well as he might please. Who the hell could convince the Warden?

door opens and in walks a very tall man wearing what is clearly a happy blend of

and like sailing adornments. His head is completely bald and his tan skin is totally smooth in all directions. He's very stout gentleman, broad chested, tall, and he's got a clip from one ear which continues in a scar down his neck on one side. He looks at the five of you and yes, you are the best.

You're the ones I've been looking for, yes? Yeah, and I really like your happy adornment of sailing attire and that incredibly smooth bald head with that scar going down your face. Thank you. I believe you're the one they call Queenie, yes? Yeah, sure, you can call me that, Miss March, if you're nasty. I've been saying... Am I nasty? We've been saying that this whole time. Taishan, Barnabas...

It's me. Your name? Yes. And you must be Scrim. How do you know my name? Well, I've heard the story of how you came to be in this very place. We were framed. I swear we've been framed. Oh, yes. It happens all the time. It was the Captain of the Guard, yes? All the time? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. 100%.

I knew it. This is not surprising to me. Oh yeah, you all told me that we were framed. Yes, Batman, we were framed. Oh yeah, you framed us. I didn't believe you. None of you are from Wuzei, so I understand if you don't understand. Coin is king here. This is a scam.

You were framed so that I could buy you, so that we could move on, so that we could, well, go on our lovely quest. I just looked at your near. Is this what you were talking about, fate? Yes, this is fate, yes. Whisked away on some quest? Oh, is this that weird guy you said that you saw? Oh, the weird guy. No offense, I like weird. Yes, for all intents and purposes, yes. All right, well, I'm in. Where are we going?

Oh, we're going to Chalk. We're traveling across the sea. Oh, Chalk the continent. Oh, yeah, I've heard of that place. Yes. Well, we are going to Chalk. You see, the chief administrator of the counting house in Wuzei, a man whose wealth has wealth, a man whose... It's such a cheap thing to call him chief administrator. He might as well be king.

He has fallen deadly ill. No! And the only medicine that we can possibly find is in chalk. So, I am unfortunately running a bit of a skeleton crew, so I would need some insurance and I understand that you guys are capable of solving problems because much to the surprise of the captain of the guard, so the story goes, and please confirm if I'm incorrect on any of these details, you are able to get rid of the ghost, yes?

Yeah, I mean, it wasn't really hard. We just let him win a battle he didn't really win. It feels like so long ago. We are pretty good at solving problems. And getting into them, too. Scrim always says innovative solutions for unusual problems. This is a deal. The fact that you made it to the ghost to solve that problem is remarkable. I mean, where do you think all those skulls came from? It was...

It was exceedingly hard with the fact that Barnabas thought we were always on the ocean when we weren't. Well, that's very good because on the ocean we are going. I'm always on the ocean in spirit.

Do I know how far Chalk is from where we are currently? That's going to be my next question. Chalk is very much to the east of where you are, and it would be many months journey. Probably, let me do some quick math here. Sorry. I think so. I think so. Oh, nasty. I got the dungeon. Oh, yeah. Sorry.

I had a little bit of hurt. Keep it down down there. It's not nighttime hours yet. Get me out of this godforsaken cell. With a... Bunch of animals. With a normal ship, it could be four to six months. With a fast ship, you could cut that down to three, two and a half, something along those lines. It's quite a journey. I mean, it would be an Atlantic distance to put it in non-fantasy parlance.

That's fine. The farther away we get from this absolute hell of a prison and this godforsaken continent, the better. Get me off this rock. The agreement I made with the warden, understand, is that we will be going to chalk, we will procure the medicine for the king of Wuzi, and then we will be making our way back. Wait, so are we going to have to go back into those holes again when we come back? No, no, no, no, no. Then you get a little stamp, a piece of paper, and you're free. But

I'm buying your freedom, but I need your help. How do we know you're not going to trick us like the guard guy did? Well, you don't. I can't. We just met. Do you have papers or a contract of some kind? It really can't be any worse than where we are. So you're saying that if we agree, we leave today? And can I get my stuff back? Done. I'm in.

You reach through the bars and he immediately grabs your hand, this huge hand encompassing yours. Get me out of here, get me out of here! Okay, okay, yes, that's what I'm trying to do. Can I get my stuff back? Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes. You'll all get all of your things back. The papers that you asked about stay with the warden and it isn't until we come back to Luzay you can get the stamp. You're free to go. Mr. Savage, Coach's plan didn't work out at the end. Do you know how far Chalk is from here? What is...

many months for us to get there and back would the king still be alive and if he is not then does this deal still buy our freedom it is a

An interesting question, and one that we must gambit, uh, gamble, in order to make this journey and back. It's not a life-threatening disease in the sense that he's going to die tomorrow, but he is willing to wager his full fortune should someone be able to solve the problem. This is a life, an opportunity of a lifetime. We, I, will become something of a lord with that much kind of wealth. You will have your freedom. I'll take it. I don't need money.

Do you have my personal effects? Oh yes! Yes, yes, yes. We'll be getting them right away. Is there a shell in those effects? I didn't look inside. It's a big sack with a bunch of... not me business. Do you need a ship's cook? The best one on this side of the world. Oh.

I have a roll for each of you. I need five people. I need five people for the purposes of completing my crew. We have able men, we have a bosun, we have a first mate, but... We do not have a chef. You have the services of Barnabos the Dreadloik. We do not have the top man.

What the hell's a top man? We do not have a surgeon, a medicine man. We do not have a helmsman. I'm no good on the boat. Oh, that's all right, I can do that. I just have to serve drinks to unruly men. They will stay very ruly. Yeah, that's fine then. Then you're all in. Sure.

Sounds like a Saturday night back home. I got the set. Let's, uh... Now, I think that we should have some ground rules here. Before we set on a ship, I think that we can't be having any whistling.

Oh, no, you shut your mouth. I'm a whistle all day long. Whip up the wind. What? Whip up the wind. Are you saying we don't whistle? What about the whistle? No, no whistling aboard the boat. How's the boat going to move without wind? I got a whistle. It's in my blood. I'm very busy.

We have a lot to do in a day. He has red hair. They're loading the cargo on the ship as we speak. We must make our way down the Zyla River. Oh, excuse me. I need to let you know that my hair is red. Is this a problem? Yeah, and apparently I'm a woman, so... Are you comfortable being the only woman on board? Yeah, sure. Are you comfortable being the only red-haired man on board? Yes. I think we're fine. See? Now, I will tell you, like myself, the rest of the crew are all humans. Mousayans.

All right. That's fine to me. Are you going to finish your sentence? I... Are you pointing out the fact that the rest of us are not humans and are quite the otherwise? You may experience some friction in that way from my crew, but I will sort them out. What else is new? Please open the bars. We've been living in holes for 80 days. I cannot open the bars, but I can tell them to open the bars and get you your things.

I'll see you just outside the tower. Are you excited? Yep, absolutely. I'm very excited. Okay, go get the guard now, please. He turns and walks to the door, and just as he's about to close it, he turns back and looks back at you. Uh-huh.

And then he closes it. Do we have any bananas on board? This guy is an idiot. He doesn't realize that the second we step off the side of this godforsaken hole and we get on Chuck, wherever the hell we're going, we can just run. We don't have to come back here. Fuck this place. Fuck the game. We don't have to come back. And where Chuck is, it's not very far from the McConey Islands. They're right up there. I know a group of people who will take us in, no problem. You know how I'm dancing around in a circle. I've never been to an island before.

I grew up in the most beautiful place in the entire world. The best food. Most beautiful women. Feet your near, and I like elbow your knee. I feel bad, though. He's getting us out, and we're just going to leave and not help him with his mission and stuff? Well, I mean, we can if we want to, but my point is if things get bad, we can just cut and run. Yeah. All right. That's the smart one. I'm just saying, just in case. We don't owe anybody anything. This town screwed us over.

Yeah, but he didn't and he's helping get us out. So I feel like if we're going to go,

We should help him. This time has really offered me an opportunity to improve some skills, so I... You can polymorph us now? Well, what is that? I don't know. It's what Scrim was saying. I tried, but it just really didn't... All right, all right, all right. I assumed it would come to me, but... All right, Queenie, fine. You're right. Let's give him a chance. You're right. He's helping us out. The least we can do is see what he needs. Yeah, if he turns into a big old jerk face, then we can leave. Right. If he tricks us. Yeah. If he...

backstabs us. I'm out of here. The door starts to open again, and you see a man walk in. Good to see you again! It's not the captain. Oh, good to see you again! For the first time! You recognize one of the guards, and you have seen him many times, so he's like...

He comes in bearing five satchels on his back. He's clearly over-encumbered, and he sets them down, and he just opens up one. Should have turned off encumbered tools. I think these are all five yours. What did you have on your person before? He points to you, Barnabas. Is there a shell there, lad? You have more shell? He starts to rummage through. No, I see a

I see some ceramic tiles with marks on them. I see bone tiles, I should say. Do you bring more, Michelle? Can I reach to the bars and grab them? He is definitely too far away. No, no, no, man. Those are my runes. That must be my bag. Can you name a few more items that you would have had on your person? Well, there's my walking stick. It's about ten feet tall. Oh, the walking stick. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll get that before you go. Um...

Two massive mammoth tusks, one of which is broken, covered in runes. I thought that was a joke. I need to go get those too. Do you see how big I am? Yeah, you're enormous. There's some seal pelts.

cloaks, there's some beets. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. He hands it through and you find yourself opening and looking upon something that you haven't seen for almost 90 days. I'll just sort of very quietly, impensively start to get my old gear back on. You start to put your gear back on. Let's see, um...

This one has a teapot in it. Ah, that's mine! Oh, great. That was easy. That was easy. Excellent. Thank you. Going through the next one, there's a little golden here, there's... Can you guys start to name some of the things that you guys have on you? I look very, like, droll and annoyed, and I say, there's a big fucking knife in mine.

- This one's yours. - And as he gives me it, and I begin to dig through my things, I'm tossing them out, and at the bottom of the bag, I am almost dismayed to see my coin. - Yeah.

I pick up the coin I put in my pocket, I sheath my knife, and I prepare, I redress. Yes, you redress. This one's got a small, like a pot in it or something. Yeah, it should have some flowers, seeds, a honeypot, some arrows, a bedroll, a dagger, some leathers, one day of rations.

Nope, those are probably gone. Rope-hempin' should be shortbow, tinderbox, and a water skein, and a sprinklin' of gold. You've got really good memory. And then you said something about a shell, right? Oh, you did say something about a shell, and also a sloop's anchor. Uh...

You have a full anchor in your bag? Yes, here, this looks familiar, and he pulls out what is this pink, beautiful, swirling, multi-colored... He pulls this out. This is the one you're talking about? Oh, you give it to your lad, yes. Yes, give it here. He puts it in your palm, and then he hands the rest of the satchel through, but I'm assuming you don't take it from him right away. My lover, I miss you so much. Did he just say to that shell what I'm thinking? Leave it there on the ground there, lad.

I'll go get your tusks. And then don't forget Barnabas's anchor. And my walking stick, please. It's like ten feet tall, he said. It's a ten foot pole. Sure enough, you...

Sure enough. And he wouldn't touch you with it. Your things are returned unto your person. You find yourselves escorted out and away from the golden egg quarry. Why don't I use it? I'll root through my pack, and I will find a... probably the bottle of rum, and there's probably only like two shots left, and I'll pull it out, and I'll look at it, and I'll say, I am not going through...

Oh, those shakes again. Mr. Sabascotch, will you like this? Done. And I down it.

And I would have spent basically much of the time, and we won't have to role play the whole thing, but with my shell. And then what season is it, Dungeon Master? Oh, the season of the... Oh, yeah! Yes! I forgot about this! It is now the 22nd of the 6th month, which makes it summer. Summer. I will, almost with the same reverence, I'll pull out this lovely bag that Kimma gave me, and with the paper that...

that he gave to you. - Kimmy gave me. - And I'm gonna steal it, and I will rip out some capstan herb, and I will have-- - Rip out a little paper. - I'll rip out a little paper. - I was gonna say, do you wanna also tell everyone what it does? - So, I have a special magical item, and so this is capstan herb. It is my grow bag, and basically it is a wondrous dark leather pouch fitted with a metal swing clasp.

And so long as it's completely empty, the bag will magically grow fresh cut and flaked pipe tobacco while the pouch is shut. The type of tobacco changes with the season. And since it is summer, it is caps and herb. The color of red beech tastes buttery, hay-like, and rum-like. And so I will have my pipe. And I have that with almost the same reverence, not quite, that I do with my shell and my grow bag. And I take some.

and I'll stick it in there, and I'll just light it. I don't even smoke, but that would get Andy to start smoking. Did that thing exist? Holy shit. I mean, you just buy four types of tobacco. No, I want exactly the way you fucking describe it. It's different when it's magic. Yeah. They all got some minor magical items as a thank you to start the campaign when we start our prologue session. Session 0.5 is the prologue.

between zero and... Okay, anyway. You and the party are escorted out and away from the Golden Egg's quarry. Good riddance. The fading sound of angry honking makes for a strange but welcome farewell as you are transported down to the riverbank of the great Xyla River and ferried through the city of Wuzei. Okay.

The ride through the city is slow and quiet. You can actively feel the humidity you've been enduring for the past three months dissolving as you approach the mouth of the river, a great delta connecting Wuzei and the Keras Sea. You're riding with this captain, and it suddenly occurs to him something in the back of his mind. He turns to, and he's been watching the buildings pass. You guys have all been processing the fact that you're free, sort of, for the first time in 89 days.

I didn't tell you my name, did I? Captain Vermeer. Oh, I thought it was Chuck. No, no, no. Captain Vermeer is what you may call me, and that is what you will call me for the remainder of our voyage. Is that fine? Whether we're nasty or not. What is the nasty? I don't understand. I don't know. It was in a song I heard once in a tavern.

Your name does not matter, thank you. Well that's not nice to say, of course your name matters, Chuck. It's nice to meet you, Captain Jermaine. I don't mean that as a negative insult, I mean none of our names matter. Just because you're an officer, Mr. Yornear, does not mean you can show disrespect to the captain. What do you mean I'm an officer? Well you're the surgeon. I mean I can perform.

The beast in the legs, yes. Is he not a surgeon, Captain? Yes, we need a surgeon. So you're an officer. You should start acting like it, even with your... The surgeon is an officer on the ship. Yes, exactly right. Well, I don't care what my job is. It's a pleasure. Oh, you say true. It's a pleasure. Scrim. That's right. They only called you... Do you have a last name as well? Yes, it's Stabascotch. Stabascotch. Scrim Stabascotch. Barnaboth... Dreadwake. Dreadwake.

That's what they call me, at least. Tyshen? Fireblossom. For the fireblossom tea. You make tea. Would you like some? When we get to the ship after we've loaded the cargo on, absolutely. Excellent. Queenie? Yeah, Miss March. If you may, sir.

I knew that. I know, it's good to have this conversation again, Chuck Verme'ai. It's not Chuck. What? And you're near. You're near. Well, it's a pleasure to meet all of you. I need you to trust me on this voyage. I need you to trust in the crew, and I need to be able to rely on you. Do you understand?

"Yeah, of course. "I mean, you got us out of that hellhole. "You've got my buy-in." You're the best ship's cook this side of the world? That is a fact. I trust anyone who can enjoy a nice cup of calming jasmine tea. Well, I do have one question, though. Yes. Are there going to be stored bananas on this voyage?

No, unfortunately. Thank goodness. What? Barnabas, what is it with you and Bananas? Bananas are bad luck on a voyage. Thank goodness we have you, Barnabas. I wouldn't even think to check for these things. You've got to check if there's any Bananas on board. Bananas? It's a doomed voyage right there. May I ask you, Barnabas,

What is it about the nature of the mamas that makes them unlucky? I mean, yeah, they don't have red hair. Are they unlucky? You just said they were bad for the-- Well, aside from the bad luck, Mr. Yordian, you know what likes to live in shipments of bananas? There are creatures that like to live in shipments of bananas? Spiders.

"Oh, spiders ain't gonna hurt you. "Most of them don't have teeth large enough to bite, "and those that do are big enough "you should know not to touch them." I've known surgeons, proper surgeons, who've had to see to it for young ship's boys and all sorts of seamen who got bit by a spider, stowed away on shipment of bananas.

You don't want to see that, Mr. Yornir. What the hell kind of bananas are you eating? It's the spiders that come with the bananas. The spiders in general. I don't think that's a true fact. Well, you won't have to worry about it because there aren't going to be any spiders on this ship. Chuck, are there spiders on this ship? There are no spiders on this ship. You're free now because of me, in a sense. I know. Captain Vermeer.

No, Queenie March. I know that's your name. Yeah. Refer to me as Captain Vermeer moving forward. Do we have an understanding? Sure, Captain Vermeer moving forward. As they say in Yorn, there she blows. My angel, the points, and you all see this giant ship. The Moorabound. Isn't she a beaut? Oh, she is.

Pulling up to the pier, you stare up at a massive Caraval style cargo ship, clearly modified to better handle the open sea. More than 200 feet in length and with three stocky masts, the moribound looks about as old as it does impressive. The beak of the ship features a roughly carved and painted figurehead, decoration of a winged woman flying forward, sword outstretched, dress billowing.

I'm sure you're all exhausted, but you can rest once we are at sea. Get these barrels and containers on board with the other men so that we can depart today, understood?

Captain Vermeer turns and starts to make his way, and he's engaging the rest of the crew. You can see that along this pier there's a variety of boxes and barrels, all of which need to be walked up these wooden planks that are leading to the actual top of the ship. I go over to a barrel that is as big or bigger than me, and I stand by it and I say, Yorner, help me with this!

And as he picks it up, I stand on top. I'll just pick up the mirror. This way, Yornir. Make a strength check.

And I'm increasing the DC. I weigh like 30 pounds. Just roll out-- I increased it by one. 19. 19, you're able to easily pick up both the barrel and the goblin that stands atop it. Streak the mighty style, I direct him up the game plank. I'll grab a barrel too and-- You grab a roll and make a strength check.

Strength, you say? 17. Easily done. You find a hog's head barrel or something along those sides and you're able to grab both sides of it and you start to make your way up. There are other men who are starting to see the lot of you making cargo happen up onto the ship and

They're giving you some strange looks, but you're not getting any offers for assistance at this point. Tyshen, do you grab a crate, a barrel? What do you grab? I'll try and grab a crate, shake things up. You shake it up? Yeah, absolutely. The crates actually require someone else, so someone-- Hey, how's it going?

It's going great. You want to help me with the sprint? I'd love to, yes. Okay, make a sprint check. You're just so positive. 15. 15, you both are able to pull both-- you're able to get underneath it and actually lift it. Even though you're the person having to walk backwards up the-- you're able to make your way up to the top of the ship without issue. Arnabos. I would want to look for a-- if there's a barrel of cod.

or any kind of fish. You do see a few barrels that are labeled in such a way that would infer fish. I would like to pick one up and see if there's any way where I think I could open it subtly. He's spitting fish. Okay. You've been around a number of barrels, and you can see that I have. Okay.

That's what she said. You can see that in the year and a half that I had to plan this campaign, I never thought, how do you open barrels?

How do you open barrels? Lid, but I mean, generally you'd have to like-- You'd have to do the thing. You'd crack the anchor into it. They're almost-- Well, that's why they're that, right? Because it creates a seal on the top of the barrel. Yeah, you like soak the barrel. There's not a barrel hole you can put his thumb in and then lift it. It would require some heft, right? Technically, yes, but this is your world. Do whatever the fuck you want. I mean, I'm just asking. This is our story to tell, so I wanted to consult with the group. I would say it would be tough to do it

stealthily, but not impossible. Just, you know, you'd have to give it some oomph. You do see a barrel and from what you can tell, red herrings are inside the barrel. And you go ahead and see if you can make a slight hand check. I would like to grab one red herring. I would like to grab one red herring from the barrel. Just one? Ooh.

I'm-- The barrel explodes. I get a six. With a six, these are some well-crafted barrels. It would require a tool or perhaps too much noise than you're willing to make to actually bang your way through this barrel. You hear another voice from the other side, someone who's clearly in charge of most of the able men of this ship. "You there!

Captain Vermain says move the cargo, you move the cargo. Come on, move that barrel. "All right, sir, Vergemane, just getting my bearings. "I will, instead of, I will ignore the barrel, "I'll reach into my pack, I'll grab a handful of salt "and throw it into the water, and I'll say, "'For you, my lover,' and then pick up the barrel "as I'm watching Yornir care. "Oh, Mr. Yornir, make sure you step with your right foot "under the ship each time, as I will

as I will keep the barrel. I intentionally step on the ship with my left hand. I missed your yard arrow, no! As you move into this barrel, I need to make a spring check. I love that. I visually piss the horned arrow,

12. 12 is enough. I mean, these are barrels, but you're a big man and you may-- Oh, you've done this a lot of times before. You're able to walk up without any trouble. Make a perception check for me. Okay. Okay, there's a better one. Perception, that'll be 18. With an 18, it is just as you are putting your right foot down onto the deck of this

ship, the more bound, that you hear a voice on the other end of the pier almost. You hear a fucking bird! Get the fuck away from me! Get the fuck away from me! You guys are all starting to make your way back down to pick up additional crates and things like that. Very specifically, though, this makes your ears perk up.

I will stand and I will step onto the ship and I'll almost take a moment and as I'll step on and I'll just kind of sigh and I'll say, "It's been far too long," and I'll drop it as soon as I hear

that person, I'm gonna look over and I'm gonna say, "Best leave it be!" You turn and you can see that he's already pulled out what appears to be a dagger and he's attempting to grab a seagull or albatross. And what I'll also add is that you need to make a perception check when the barrel hits the ground. I am going to drop the barrel and I'll make a perception check right now. Natural 20.

24. When the barrel lands, it sounds a little like this. Then, you can see the dagger starting to come down. This guy is attempting to, but failing to grab a bird that is around the other barrels of fish.

What do you do? I am going to just drop the barrel, ignore the jingle jangle that I saw, and absolutely just sprint full tilt to him. And I'll say, don't you dare land on that seabird, lad! And I'm going to be just sprinting towards him. And let's see if you can get to him before his annoyance bests him and he is able to actually stab down. Make a dexterity check for me.

You know what, I'm gonna, can we die? We also have twists. Depending on how badly you want to save this bird. That looks like a good number. 13. That's pretty good. With a 13, it's at the other side of the pier. By the time you're able to reach them, the albatross is cut at the neck, completely coming free. It starts to flop down onto the pier, and he's holding the fucking bird. He throws it into the water in disgust and starts to yell at the other men in frustration to move.

the additional barrels that need to get closer to the deck now that you've been clearing the way. What are the four of you guys doing as this unfolds? I would say that I've perched myself on top of another barrel and asked Jornir to help me with it.

You're on the pier boat. And then I notice, if you are willing to continue to carry me back. Yes, I would basically keep carrying Scrim on their own. And I would have seen Barnabo's, I guess, full tilt run and been like, to your near, been like, oh no, what is he on about now?

That's about it. What do you mean? I don't think I would really notice. I think it would just be like squabble of the ears. If you had asked me, I'd be like, "Well, he's running. "This certainly can't be good." Sprinting and screaming, you see Barnabas running down the pier. What do you guys do as you see Barnabas running just before this event unfolds? You know, Scrim, that he is mad. Well, certainly, but we can't have him be attacking anyone.

The last time, a building caught on fire. Who did that? I don't know, but maybe we should follow after him and help? Seems like something of urgency is happening.

I'm sure he just thinks he's saying, "Spiders, I'm gonna keep getting these barrels up on the ship. "I'm just gonna keep grabbing barrels." I will have spun around on the barrel, though, and while I'm being carried backwards, just watching him run down the pier to see what's going on. Yeah, I would just keep going. I would be like, you know, he's off to his own crazy way. And I'm peeking over Yornir's head from on top of the barrel. I'm just gonna make sure he's okay. I'd try and fuck him.

This merchant sees you running at him. What do you want? I am going to run up to him and try to grab him by the scruff, and I'm going to try to just lift him up. Oh, dear lord. And say, what is your rank, boy?

You're able to grab him easily. He's not a strong man. He's just in simple robes and clearly here to conduct the business that his manager perhaps sent him down to do. He's young and you're able to pick him up very easily. Hey, what are you doing? Stop, what are you doing?

You just killed a seabird, lad. You know what you've done for this voyage. He was pecking at me, what do you mean? I'm gonna try to break his nose with my fist. Roll a hit. So the second I would see the scuffle happening, I would immediately say to your near, oh no,

You can handle the sparrow without me, right? And I would jump over his shoulders and run down the pier towards Barnabus. I'm not going to try to stop him. I'm going to roll-- It's only an 11. It's only an 11. With it in his grappled state, I would say that an 11 does it. You're able to hit him across the face. Oh! No, no, no, we're going back to jail, no! And...

The other men who are around him aren't helping him. They may not have been well liked. They're themselves backing away. But you do feel the attention of the crew and you actually hear a bit of a whoop from one of the crewmen of the Morabound. I am going to look at the dead bird floating in the water.

and I'm going to look at his bloody, broken nose, and I'm gonna say, "Now that I am your officer, you're gonna be making all of the dark, lonely journeys through the hole for all of my ingredients. And that is if we even make it halfway to our destination." And I'm gonna drop him on the ground, and I will say,

At least it's good luck to spill blood in a fight before a voyage. I'm gonna turn around and I'm gonna head back to the shack. You turn around and just at your legs, skidding to a stop is Scrim. And two or three of the crewmanics that you're going to get to know over the course of this voyage, they've stopped up and they're smiling. Barimus, what have you done?

It's not what I've done, it's what he's done. It was just a bird. We can't go back to prison. Seabirds have the souls of dead sailors, Mr. Stabiscotch. Now, now, now, Officer Barnaboze, please, I'm just a lowly top man and I don't know anything about anything, but I need you to not do this, I can't go back to prison! I'm just a lowly top man-- And I'll look down at Spam and I'll say, "You'll be wishing that you were back in prison."

And I'm just gonna walk past them. And I'm gonna look around and see if... You said that there were people, like, smiling. I'm gonna see if there's, like, anyone coming to arrest Barnabus. And potentially us. There don't appear to be any guards rushing. The crewmate of the more abound, the three that approached, seem to have...

- Been there for similar reasons. They too looked down upon a killing of a seabird and when Barnabas took action and was able to right the wrong that was made by this simple merchant, they turn and they continue to pick up crates and barrels of Silenol. - I'm going to take one step backwards or two step backwards, turn and then back down the pier and go walk back with Barnabas very close to him.

Very confused as to what just happened. I have no fucking idea. And it's with that that the afternoon passes with you steadily and surely and confidently making your way. Small boxes, large boxes, big crates, small barrels, hogsheads, different partitions, long sticks, additional rope. The provisions on the Mora Bound are seemingly endless. This is a huge ship, multiple layers, maybe six, seven ships.

actual slices, including the builds. You're bringing them downstairs, you're starting to familiarize yourself with the rooms of the ship, and it's as the sun starts to approach the horizon that you're able to say,

That's it, that's all the cargo. And it's clear in this moment that having loaded the ship, we're not leaving in the morning. Captain Vermeer wants to leave tonight. And he's gathering everyone around. I hate to do this, was it a red sky? No.

I hate to do this, he says. Roll a d20. He provokes the-- It's higher than a 10. It's an eight. It's not a red sky at night, I'm sorry to tell you. I look up and-- That is not a delight. I'm going to spend, and I will dutifully, you know, I spill the blood before the voyage,

and I will just keep loading everything, then I'll try to just make sure what the stores are and try to get a list of whatever we have for the voyage. Still disturbed that perhaps you didn't do enough. You are among the last of the crew to pull up the planks and

that lead up to the ship are able to help uncoil the ropes. And pretty soon, the ship itself is starting to pull away from Luzay, from this great dock. And then I'd like to try to find the captain.

It's easy to find the captain, for he is gathering the men on the top of the ship, and he's standing one level up, just there, looking down at everyone from his balcony. I will approach the captain, and he might notice that I have one of the red herrings in my hand, since I've unloaded and probably set up the galley, and I would go to him and I say, "Captain, I know that there's a lot of fine things "aboard this vessel. "Do you have any pearl or nacre?"

A pearl or a what? Do you have any pearl, mother or mother of pearl? Anything jewelry made out of an oyster? Maybe, or why? Oh, you need it right away, please. Make persuasion check. Natural one. We're gathering around. I'm about to give a big speech. We can talk about it later. Of course. Settle down now, crew. Of course, Captain. Gather around, gather around. Settle in? Good.

We embark today on a noble mission. A great heaping pile of nobility that comes in the form of shiny flat coins. The crew cheers and woots. - Woot! - That's right, gentlemen and lady. The head administrator of the Counting House of Wuze has fallen terribly ill.

Head administrator is a cheap way of saying king, in my opinion. For I dare say few here could challenge his authority. That, my good lads, is why we unfurl our sails today.

Today we sail for shock. Only there can the necessary medicine that will slow and stop our good patron's malady be acquired, for a king's bounty will be rewarded to us all. Enough that we might each one of us buy another 20 ships just like this one on which you now stand, with enough left over to deed a modest villa, I dare say. You hear more cheers and whoops from the crowd.

Hear me very well, gentlemen and lady.

This is no private bounty. This is a race. I know three other vessels looking to depart for this same hunt. There will be more. We may be the first to unfurl our sails, but that is no guarantee. As I'm sure most of you know, the sea of fog between Yulong and Shok is a misery, especially during summer.

constantly adding weeks if not months to any voyage. No visibility, navigation, and progress becomes impossible. That is why I have charted a path southbound through the Karas Sea around Drakkar.

The crew grows silent. You can hear nervous whispers all about you. I know, I know, it won't be a terribly warm voyage, and it adds 400 nautical leagues to the distance. This is the gambit we must make.

As captain, I'm not just telling you that this is our path. I am asking you to do it with haste. With fair winds and urgency, we add only two weeks to our journey while those dullards chase their own ships' tails in circles. By the time fall is here, we'll be sailing back westward from shock with a single vial and other trade goods worth ten times what we have here today.

You're starting to hear the whooping. You're starting to hear the hollering all around you. The crew is clapping and cheering. So be it, lads. Let this destiny be ours. Together, let this be the swan song voyage for the moribound. For next year, we will be sitting on a beach of our very own islands. Onward to glory and to riches.

- All right. - Yeah, they're getting out of those holes. - I point to Queenie. - The crowd goes wild. The crew, they're all looking at each other going, okay, I didn't quite expect that. I didn't realize why we were moving with such haste, but now I get the picture and they immediately turn and begin to go about their business.

What are you guys doing? I would lean into the rest of the group and say, well, I certainly hope that...

procuring this antidote is not the catch-all for our freedom. I didn't realize we'd be fighting for it. The old Kay and Unray is looking a little bit better now. The cotton rod, we're looking at the cotton rod. Oh, I had no idea what you were saying. Neither did I. This is the will of the gods.

And it's incredibly exciting! I've never been in a race before! There will be no race. The captain said there'd be a race! I do not intend to participate in a race. We are going south. We're going where it is cold. That is where my journey lies.

Do I know of, with the murmuring of the crew in my sailing days, do I know of this passage as it being like, this pathway being dangerous? You make a history check. Wow, that actually might be pretty good. Looks good from here. Or anything of a southeast passage, so to speak.

- 20. - 20. With a 20, you will say, yeah, that's more than enough. People don't go south very often. It gets cold quickly. That's one of the major reasons. Certainly, if you were going to make a journey like this, now would probably be the best time because you're entering someone. And you know that even farther south, the tales that you've heard from other sailors

are terrifying. However, Jakar, it's possible that you would be able to make the slingshot voyage that the captain is describing. It's not a bit random. Okay.

I'll, yeah. Well, I don't really know what's on the docket for tonight, but I'm certainly not new. I'm new to ships in general. I'm hoping to find a little bit of rum and maybe a little, I know I'm the top man, but I'm looking to find some top round roasted maybe. If anybody's looking to have some food, that would be good for me. Salt pork tonight. What? Salt pork tonight. What's salt pork? Salt pork.

It's exactly what it sounds like, Mr. Staviscotch. I believe it is pork with salt. Okay, well, at least it's meat. Is it hot? No. What? It's... Would you like me to boil it, Mr. Staviscotch? No, no, I trust you. You're the world's greatest cook and all that. You'll get some ship's biscuit. Okay, what about rum? He'll get your rug. Oh, perfect. Well, then I'm set. That's one third rum.

What's the other two thirds? Water. Oh, sweet heavens. And we've got plenty of it. We've got plenty of everything we need. The captain walks up. We've got water. We've got... Well, not you name it, but we have most things.

All right, well then I guess I'll wait for that. What else is there to do? Well, we have to unfurl the sails and begin our actual trek out into the journey, but I wanted to make sure that you were well settled. We all are just getting our sea legs back, so to speak. You're the top man. Mr. Sabascotch, that's your job. I look around and I say, no one's explained to me what that is.

The top man stands at the top of the mast. Excuse me? He goes, yeah, you're gonna crawl all the way up to the middle of the middle mast and you're gonna make sure that we don't hit anything. Sounds like a very honorable role. Taishan wants to do it. Taishan is our helmsman. I don't know, Taishan seems like he really wants to climb up there. When I'm not, he's manning the wheel. I'm good with the wheel. He has to stay up all night.

I'm good to stay. I have to get up there now. I want you to introduce, I wanted to introduce you to one of my friends. This here is Ellis, apologies, Fenton Armstead. Fenton, okay. Fenton, this is, he's bosun. He's in charge of men when I'm not around. Do you understand? Sure. Does he rank above Barbos?

Everyone ranks above y'all. He doesn't say y'all. Okay, sure. Go ahead, Fenton. What's the... Fenton here is going to take you down to your quarters. Understand? Yeah, sure. Fenton, I understand that you're going to be joining us for this little voyage.

Are you? Yes, and we're very excited! I do have one question. Yes, how can I help you? Does anyone need surgery? Not... Hopefully never, and not in an immediate sense. Well, as the ship's surgeon, I just figured...

I could do something, but no one has come to me and said I need surgery, so... I have not done anything in my current role. So just checking. Well, we'll show you your surgery room. Hopefully you know where it is before you need to use it, and hopefully no one comes to you with that urgency. Certainly, certainly. Yeah, I mean, ideally, you have an extremely boring trip.

That would be nice. - It looks like you're in good hands. I've got a lot of work to do. You go downstairs, you get settled. I'll see you soon. And the captain flustered and full of energy turns around and stomps his bald head away and into the crowd, starting to talk to other crew members. Fenton stays with you. Well, we should probably go downstairs. We're two levels down where we're putting you. - I do have a question.

Does the captain's wound from his ear under his neck look like a hangman's wound?

- That's a great question. It does look like, I would say even without having to roll, it does look like a cutlass or sword or dagger, some sort of a bladed injury. It doesn't have that like rough patchiness to it. It does appear to be a clean break with something of like an indentation to it. - Understood, thank you. - Before we go down, I'd like to step to the side of the ship and pull out the fish and I will say, well, it's not pearls like you like, but for you, my lover,

Perhaps you can spare us and then I'll turn back and join the rest of the group. Giving you a bit of a queer look and just sort of like... Are we all ready?

- Either way, sir. - Yeah, please. - He starts to make his way down and through the belly of this ship. And from the stairs that he takes you down, stairs is actually not a very accurate term. These are very tall ladders, essentially.

They have steps and you can walk up them without touching the actual bars, unlike a totally vertical ladder might be, but they are extremely steep and you have to make your way through these narrow little holes from one level into the next. And eventually he's able to take you down. As you guys are making your way through, a orange cat with green eyes immediately runs through. Oh, that's my cat. Please take care of her. She's meant to be here. - Oi, what's her name?

Fiesta. Fiesta. That's... a cat on board is good luck. So, good sign. Yeah, I thought so as well. I've never had any bad luck with her on board, certainly. It's an orange cat? It is. Is it not a problem that the cat has red hair? Oh yes, fur, Mr. Yorinair. What's the difference in your mind between fur and hair? It's not an animal, you're a man.

Isn't fur just hair? That's... A cat is an animal. You are a man. It's different. Alright. Just checking.

- You'll have time to meet everyone, I'm sure. I just wanna make sure that you have somewhere to put your things and then I can continue to make sure that everything is as orderly as it should be. - When do I have to go up in the bucket? - I imagine in perhaps less than the strike of a clock, probably in another hour or so, as soon as we're ready to totally unfurl and raise anchor. - Can I take my grog up there? - That would be a question for the captain.

No. Oh. Yorner, I want you to promise me something. Oh, what? There's a 50-50 shot I fall from that bucket. If I do, you do not save me. Just let me die. I don't want to survive that fall. In fact, you put me out of my misery. Do you want to switch jobs? I'm supposed to be serving grog to a bunch of the rowdy guys downstairs, so I figured you could probably steal a bunch and get liquored up while you're doing it, and I ain't afraid of heights.

I'm gonna get in the bucket. Indeed you shall. What the captain says goes. And you make your way past walls of crates and barrels. I mean, you moved most of this stuff on with the remaining crew, but actually now seeing it all in one place and away from the docks, this is everything that you have. This is everything you and the crew have. This is all that you can...

to need in terms of food, and suddenly occurs to you, wow, there's...

At sea, we'll hopefully have enough water, we'll have enough beef, we'll have enough, and as you do, there are two goats in one corner, and you can see that there are a number of chickens all clucking around for the purposes of milk, eggs, that sort of thing. Eases your mind a little bit, and you make your way down to the second layer of this ship. It's hard for me to describe, actually. Why don't I pull out a map thing? - Do we have to make one?

Yeah, you're gonna have to make a ship. All right, let's fucking go. And you're being escorted by the bosun. Fenton. Fenton. Thank you. Right here to actually access your different rooms. You got me fucking enthralled. Okay. Let's do great. We're in Sorsel. I'm goddamn in Sorsel, all right? Your wizard's boon is taking me in.

He points out to you that you can take the rooms that you want in any configuration, except this largest room goes to Mylin, who is...

a mute and that you probably shouldn't deal with him. He explains that this is the privy, you can enjoy the latrine, but you'll have to clean it out yourself. This room is for you to enjoy and anyone else who should wanna come down. And there's sort of something like a workstation or a table here. Choosing whatever room you should so please, and he sort of makes a light joke when looking at Scrim and...

- Queenie, that perhaps one of you would prefer the smallest of the rooms. Everyone usually has to gamble in order to see if, to avoid the room, but he expects that you might actually enjoy it and whether or not you might fight about it is on his mind. - Well, Queenie, I appreciate you offering to switch jobs with me, so I'm happy to take the smaller room. - Aye.

I'm trying to do my freaking Peggy voice. Oh, you know. Sorry. It's the room curse. It's the room curse! Well, you know, I'm all right sleeping in the small room, too, so whatever.

No, no, sir, I insist. Be more comfortable. I'll take the small room. It's fine. Chances are good I'm gonna die anyway, so don't worry about it. Why would you say that? Tyshen, please. And I go into my room and I drop my things. Did anyone notice when we were walking by all those storage boxes, it looked like the shape of a wiener? What?

I stick my head out. Someone asked where the penis was on the map. It's totally right there. Oh, there it is! That's a big dick, Eric! You did it! That's a penis. Look, there's the ball. The 10-foot staff. It's even like from far away, it's like a mosaic of penis. Didn't even occur to me. I do not mind where I sleep, so I will take what's left over. Where would you like to stay?

whatever room you want to put me in. I think I've probably got to get to work soon, though. I'm thinking people are going to need some grog. This is the other small room. Do you like to take it? Yeah. Here's the thing. Sometimes I like to sneak a little honey in the middle of the night, so if I'm closer to the lavatory,

it's probably best. I also know none of y'all's gonna clean up after yourselves, so I should probably be close enough to clean up after you two. You take the room next to the privy. Yeah, oh wow, this room stinks! Oh man! How are you? Doomed to avoid a drone, fart sounds. I will take this room, this one seems fine. That was a bad choice. Well, I'm going up in the bucket.

I suppose I'll join you up on deck. I demand the helm. There will be salt pork, ship's biscuit, and pea soup when you return, Mr. Stabbscotch. You can't send it up to, there's no like a drawstring, another bucket, like a smaller bucket to go up to the big bucket. Would you like to get your supper before you go up there? I'm a little worried it might come back up.

- You know what? I'm gonna go up to the bucket. I'm just gonna see how this goes. It'll be fine. It'll be absolutely fine. - You're not the only crewmate as you make your way up and out. You can see that there are many people on netting, using different footholds, working to unfurl and attach and actually start to pull up these massive, massive sails that are for each of the three masts, in addition to some smaller sails for stabilization, that kind of thing.

Once I get to the mast with the crow's nest, not that Scrim knows that's what it's called, I'm surprisingly dexterous and I scurry up that ladder all the way up. I would say you do that without issue.

Barnabas, where do you find yourself? I would get to the galley as soon as possible and survey and basically be, I'd be barking orders to whomever they would have been assigned to assist for this evening's meal. And I'd be barking orders and getting all

of the ingredients that I would need in order to make enough hardtack, salt pork, and pea soup. The person that you'd be barking orders at, effectively your assistant, is the barmaid. So you're working directly with Queenie in order to run the kitchen and the dining room. Oi! Miss March!

Yeah. How are you going to eat at Sissily tonight? I'm serving people meat. That's what it is, right? I'm putting some honey in it every time I serve it. They seem to like it.

You've found that among the many mundane things, this ship does have one wonderful feature, and that is that there is a cask that is effectively an endless decanter. You can turn it, and you can, just thinking about it, enjoy an ale or enjoy a water or enjoy whatever someone requests. They're able to make that request without it. Just don't think about mayo.

Turns out it's an alchemist jar. Mayo, lemon juice. Oh, it's an Icy Oatly. That's a good dressing, it sounds very dressing. After about 20 minutes of being in the crow's nest, it's very quiet, I look over the edge and I'm like, hey!

Hey, can you guys hear me? Yes. What am I looking for? Nobody gave me direction. I think anything. Given that we are at open sea, I think anything out of the ordinary you should know about. We're not moving yet. Never mind. I just mean in the future. Thank you.

And what do you find yourself doing, Taishan, as the voyage is just about to get underway? So, I don't... Would I be moving towards the helm, or is that, like, at a different time? You said when the captain sleeps. Oh, basically when he's not at the helm. You're kind of like the ball boy in tennis who, like, runs up and takes care of business. Oh, oh, oh, he's not there. I'll be there to stabilize it. And he'll...

give you more direction about exactly how many notches you need to turn it when he's asking for a certain turn or maneuver when it comes to the ship. But primarily, it looks like your services are particularly needed on this first day because the captain is there shouting orders at the different crew members. You're holding on to, he's clearly gunning to go.

I would, I think I would still be towards the helm trying to learn what I can from him.

He would start to explain in more detail than I care to memorize nautically. Thank you for your honesty. I just don't want to be a person who's like, I never sail. I'm going to make it up or I'm going to, no. Oh yeah. So turn it that way. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Yeah. He's, he's giving you the one-on-one version of things, but right now the writer isn't doing any real work. You're not turning. You're,

sitting on the ocean because they're finally, finally finishing up things and of course they poof out as the fair winds start to push you out and into the Karst Sea just beyond southwest Yulong. This podcast is brought to you by our Patreon. Become a patron today at patreon.com slash legends of Avantris and gain access to tons of exclusive perks including a monthly movie night and a weekly Patreon exclusive campaign set on the high seas.

It's been...

10 days now since you departed the delta dock area of Wuze, the river city, said goodbye to the golden egg, and finally you are out on the open sea, and it is getting cooler. I sailed as a DM a little bit to...

to describe exactly how sweaty and hot and humid and horrid it is at the point of southwest Yulong where you found yourself. We're talking about like 99, feels like 106 kind of humidity. Very, very hot. And hotter still, busting rocks, certainly. However...

It's getting cooler now as you travel south. We're lowering the temperature band, so to speak. We're dropping now from 106 to the low 90s, and that actually feels like a release. We're going to do this again a few times. I'm going to need your assistance to help me tell the story of this voyage.

What does it look like your first week as you're just getting back into the swing of things, getting your sea legs? Do you take to seaboys easily and quickly, or do you find it hard to get to know this crew that's a bit standoffish with the exception of perhaps the laughing captain and the more timid Fenton?

Not Fenton. Yeah, Fenton. I mean, I think that I would basically fall back into it immediately and I would absolutely be in my element. I would love it. Being back in a galley, feeding the men, I would get to know all their names.

And I would basically heal everyone, every one of them. Their strength and their ability for this void is my responsibility as the cook. Including your companions. And my friends, obviously. Including your companions. This is a 19-strong crit. Yes. The captain...

The both of them you've met, they're the cabin boy who you meet named Roland Stonebridge. - I would have Roland helping me and I would get very upset if he would like, when he's cracking eggs into like the soups or the stews or whatever we're doing, and if he doesn't smash the eggshells enough to my liking.

I will get very upset with him and berate him every time. And I would, in turn, pull him to the side and, like, bump him up and tell him, it's going to be okay, Roland. Like, you'll get it next time. I will say, do you want wishes? That's how you get wishes if you don't crush your eggshells enough, boy! I don't want to be a chef. Stop. Stop writing my journal. Stop.

You fucking donkey! It's Rowan! What are you? I'm an idiot sandwich. Rowan is clearly not here for the journey. He does... If you are intending on making him a chef or teaching him the ways of the sailor, it's not an easy task because he's constantly escaping to a hiding hole somewhere in this superstructure that is this ship. And...

drawing, writing, these kinds of things. I would be trying to be, I'd be extra stern with him, but I'm trying to teach him how to actually be in the gallery. Natural to be a ship's coach. Well, make a persuasion check to see how well you do. Oh, sure. Oh, that's actually better than I was expecting. Uh, persuasion? That'll be an 18. An 18? He actually does start to warm you. Grabs his super assistance.

Smash those eggshells, boy. He starts to show up when you've asked him to. Witches are going to be sailing on those things. It's primarily those kinds of superstitious sayings that seems to attract him the most. These first ten days, you're near. How do you find yourselves?

I would just basically throughout the voyage, I would take my knife and I would basically around the ship, whether it's in the walls or in the gunwale or rails or whatever the ship has or anywhere where there's void, I'd be like just kind of carving runes around the ship just to try to kind of, you know,

Hope for a good voyage and protect us as much as we can. Ellis Coombs. The carpenter on this... For the entire week? How much does Ellis Coombs... Let me tell you. Ellis Coombs! Ha ha ha ha ha!

I didn't spell the name right. I didn't spell the name right. Do I not know a dirty phrase? Remember Match Game 76? Ellis Coombs is all over you.

He does not want you touching that one. I'm gonna call you Alice. I would basically, if you were like, tell me to stop, I would stop, but then I would go into my cabin and I would like...

A few runes here and there. He truly cares about the integrity of this ship, but he's not getting over you one way or the other. No, no, no, I would ignore him. How are you feeling as top man, Scrim? I'm not so sure. I have traded one prison for another. I don't know where the sea ends and the sky begins and where the bucket begins and my feet begin. I am one with the ship, but I don't want to be.

Is there any more Grog? Help me! It falls on deaf ears, because usually during the evenings, and night especially, the ship surface, the deck, is...

- Not often travel. It's very rare that someone will come up here for a breath of fresh air. - The days are mundane, but they are still busy and there's still a lot to do and there's sleep to be had. You find yourself all alone. - I'm very alone. - At Crow's Nest. - Everyone's for a while. - Checking the horizon, not just for obstacles, but-- - Well, I haven't worked a day in my life and I don't intend to start now. - Exactly right.

What about you, Queenie? Oh, you're helping. Yep, tie down. You're becoming a more skilled helmsman every day, I will say. And it's starting to get cooler. Another 10 days have passed. It's now the 14th of the seventh month. And you're starting to really feel like you know how to ride the waves and not jostle things too much. Yeah, I'm feeling good. I'm at the helm. Let's see.

Well, so presumably I'm working like overnight. Exactly right. Yeah, so. Or whenever the captain needs you. And certainly there are eight other able men. You're not the only person who the captain trusts with this purpose, but the captain is, for whatever reason, felt inspired to make you this person. And that responsibility you take however seriously you like.

I would consider this position to be extremely honorable. Like, I would approach it with great, like, you know, I would be locked into the goal while my hands are on the helm. But, like, the second I'm relieved, I think I'd be, oh, I missed the airy open peaks of Yulong. I'm not, I'm more comfortable at the helm, but...

I don't know that the seas are for me. Make a constitution saving throw. See how you've been doing over these last 20 days or so. And I will also say that yes, absolutely. As you make that roll, you have been-- That looks like a small number. We'll call that the old sea legs out the window. I'm so sorry. Way there, there, Mr. Foyer Lawson.

You're doing what you find for not being bronze of scale. And what is your actual constitution score when you tell me your actual roll? Con is 14. The saving throw would be

Saving throws, Matt, what I'm asking, just the actual modifier plus what you rolled. Oh, eight. Eight, yeah. You, Ralph, the first week is probably... You're out. Probably the hardest. Eventually, you do start to find yourself able to...

withstand the more rainy or tumultuous sea times, but as soon as it starts to really, really become a problem, the captain has to take over because you get seasick a little bit more easily than you'd probably prefer. Relieve is exactly the word when those sorts of situations happen, so that you can go down into your quarters

lie down, stare up at the ceiling, maybe go to the privy, these kinds of things. First thing I would do would be to brew a cup of tea to wash the taste out of my mouth. Yikes. Absolutely. And you find that the mint is probably the most settling and anything salty.

tends to actually help really, really resolve the nerves. So that's something that you've learned over the last 20 years, or 28 days. 20 years? You say? Oh my God. It's been a long time. Scrim is dead. I can only dream of the 28 years at sea. It gets cooler. Another 10 days pass and...

it's now starting to feel actually like moderate now. And there are some storms, but we weathered them well enough. The more bound is a ship at being as old and creepy as it is, is extremely robust. I mean, there's a reason why it's lasted this long, certainly. And we're now finding ourselves in

60 65 70 degrees fahrenheit uh a much more um reasonable temperature it's almost starting to to feel fall-like uh to you who uh those of you who have enjoyed that kind of weather would you all do it how do you how do you spend your recreation time on a ship like this i would be trying to drink

And I would be playing games of chance with the crew. It's cards, dice. - There are many games of chance. - Yeah, I would be trying to swindle people. That would be my, whether it makes me enemies or not, I would be almost foolishly trying to take, fools and their money are easily separated, right? - Certainly. - And I would be trying to take advantage of the games of chance and maybe try to get away with cheating with my coin.

doing some things that are probably not extremely wise when you're locked on boat with the same people for many, many months at a time. - I would say that you make friends and enemies, frenemies in the same way that, you know, they're a competitive group. Many of these able men, and you've come to know them, Stafford, Tell, Waverly, these gentlemen, they're Moussaeans, and so they,

their, their personality isn't as strong from one to the next, but they all enjoy a good game. They'll, uh, tell you about their life and they ask you about what you've traveled, you've enjoyed so far. And, uh, but you do need a match. Uh, uh,

Someone who's a very competitive card player, somebody who's been enjoying these games very much. Nightly, he is a gentleman who clearly knows his way around a deck of cards. And it's with him that you know that almost every evening it will be a head-to-head game after everyone else has been knocked out, be it a game of cards or even some of the more physical games like darts or...

Status drop, Jeevan. I would say with this Sutton fellow, I would become it up to you. Known as one of the men you go to when you want to gamble. Always open to gamble.

And you find him almost every evening in the dining room or one of the recreation rooms for this purpose, pulling a chair out and welcoming you. A warming view over the last month, more than perhaps some of the other sailors that you've met. But everyone's always down for a game, especially once duties are coming to a close.

What else does anyone want to do with the remainder of their time? I would have set up maybe a small wooden barrel and I would have been taking all of the compost from the cooking, like the eggshells and things like that, and planted a couple of my seeds and I would tend to those and try and get them to grow on the ship.

Okay, over the next 10 days, the temperature starts to drop. It's getting cool now. We're talking about 50, 55 degrees Fahrenheit. But even so, you are able to put water into the soil and the compost. It takes to the compost pretty quickly. You even have a few sprouts.

by the time the captain, or rather one of the men, tells you that the captain has asked for all of you to enjoy a dinner with him. This, the sixth of the eighth month. Six, wait, six months have passed? No, it is the...

Of the year. Of the eighth month. Of the eighth month of the year. Oh, I see. The sixth of August. Eighth month, sixth day. I'm not gonna use August or something non-fantastic. It's the equivalent. But it is the equivalent of the eighth month. There was a Caesar Augustus. In the calendar that you all share, exactly right. So on this slightly cooler night, your duties are relieved from you and the five of you sit down. How have you been making off?

I mean, I'm certainly no native to a ship like Officer Barnabas, but, you know, it's been good. I get lonely up in the bucket, but, you know, the food is good, the grog is good, the games are good. Thank you very much, Mr. Savage Coach. Well, I mean, it's very clear you know your way around a boat. You know, I'm just lucky I don't get seasick like Taishen.

- Well, Barnabas's salted pork has helped me along with that. And if I may, Captain, it has been an honor to be able to man the helm in your absence. And I would bow to him. - He lets out a little laugh, but he, an honor, yes, yes, absolutely. Yeah, my pleasure. And the cooking is indeed good for Barnabas. - Thank you very much, Captain.

We're here for coin. We're not here to buy, well, perhaps we can when we have it, but we're here for a prize. I appreciate that you respect the duty, but honor is not a word we use very commonly among the crew.

Most of the crew I've encountered seems extremely honorable. Barnabas himself is a man of great honor. Tends to all things seafair and seaworthy with the same gusto that I've seen him destroy a tavern. You see, you see. Oh yeah, that's true, Mr. Fireblossom, that is true. Perhaps you see much farther than I do when it comes to the hearts of men, men.

How are we doing in our race? Any word from the other ships? The winds have been fair. There have been very few evenings or days, as you well know, up in the crow's nest, where we've come to a complete sandstill. I get a thousand-yard stare as he enters the crow's nest. Do you know how much further we are from the next sign of land? Uh...

Yes, actually. Our quartermaster, Walker Clements, I'm sure you've met him a few times, our navigator. He is hard at work tracking stars, making sure that we're where we need to be. And we're right on track. We expect to see the northwest coast of Drakkar in another ten days. Uh-huh. Captain, do you really expect us to make it through the...

Southeast passage with this ship whole. It is a risk. It is a risk. And I know we'll make it through. It's just a question of whether we make it through fast enough to earn our prize. Have you or any captain you sailed under done it before?

- No, however, we've gotten some information from Mylan. He actually is from Drakkar, is my understanding. As few words as he does say,

I've never heard him speak a word. He is shaking his head yes and pointing and shaking his head no when it comes to making certain choices. We believe that we're going to be able to thread the needle. Is he your ice master? Well, I imagine he knows quite a bit about ice. Given the fact that it is still the middle of summer, we don't expect to...

hit much in the way of ice flows. Mainly small specks of ice, perhaps some flurries. I don't mean to be presumptuous, but we haven't had a lot of time with you since, you know, all those days ago in the cell. You mentioned after the fact, after we signed up, that this was a race. Does our freedom depend on winning that race?

No, no actually. If we make our way to Chalk and then we come back to Wuzay and we have been bested by some other crew, that was not in my contract deal with the warden. I never doubted it for a second. What do you know of this land of Drakan? I understand it's almost uninhabited, isolated. It's not connected the same way, and I understand you're a man from Amut.

This? That circle, there's so much land there, and you can travel from one continent to the next almost, just circumnavigationally. The Dracarys are... Well, except for... Except for Asozoa, it's nearly on the edge of the world. And it is cold, it is harsh land.

It is a harsh land. I understand that it gets quite cold, but like I said, that is why we chose this path. We left in the beginning of summer. We'll be able to pass just under the south of Drakkar and above the two islands that my maps indicate. And through that needle, we will thread, making our way through Chalk, through to Chalk.

We'll have clear skies for the rest of our lives. Well, that's good enough for me. It sounds great that Jakar is not our destination. Let's talk instead. No, no, no, yes, yes. Trust that you are an expert seamstress. Seamstress? You're talking threading the needle. Cheers, my good lad. Great joke. He holds up a mug. Cheers, yeah, yeah. Keep the crowd coming. And we don't plan on making...

in any city or village in Drakkar. We stay off the coast the whole time. From what I've been told, there are no ports along the western coast of Drakkar. You'd have to go to the northeast, to the Dwarven Kingdoms that lie in the archipelago there, but that is another reason why we're not going through that twisted path. Plus there's no time, we gotta win the race.

"We might, well, if Young Bacchettin is right, then we'll all be enjoying fruity beverages and sizzling pork in the Makhani Islands by now time." You mention these Makhani Islands and I gotta say it sounds pretty fantastic. "I do like the sound of sizzling pork." "It's unlike anything you've ever had before, but mmm."

Your evening with the captain continues and eventually you say your farewells. Another ten days go by and on the 17th, 16th of the eighth month, you find yourself shivering a little bit. It's cold. It's starting to feel like 30, 35, 40. It's starting to get to the point where you look up at the clouds and

wonder if there might be a flake or two um there are jackets there there are coats and things that you can wear um nothing heavy nothing that that that would really um as it turns out uh people in wuzei very rarely buy furs so there's nothing along those lines but uh there's a few extra layers especially for a top man to to enjoy uh if you have a a warm mug um you might be able to uh

withstand the blowing winds that seem to get faster and faster as you make your way south. Warm mug of grog. I don't know if you warm grog. Do you warm grog, everybody? Yeah, scrim worms grog. Scrim worms grog. I would, I think, what was the cat boy's name? That was, it wasn't Ellis Coombs. That's the one.

I'm Mr. Ellis. I'm gonna bother both of you. I'm there, cums! Is it Roland, I think? No, what was his first name? What was his last name? You're talking about Roland Stonebridge. Oy, Mr. Stonebridge, this is-- Yes, sir. I here take this brandy I warmed up, bring it up to Mr. Stab of Scotch. It's a cold one today. And I think that he could use it.

- Thank God, Barnabas. - Well, not enough though for him to lose his wits and miss an iceberg. - Right away, Mr. Barnabas. - Oh, he's a good lad? - You find a small hand lifting up a warm rod. - Oh, sweet gods. Is this from Barnabas? - Yeah, yeah. - Tell him.

But I owe him my life. Minutes later. He tells you that he owes you his life. Well, he was a great captain when we were in that egg. So he's all he can do. I was amazed. I would keep an eye out for any kind of birds that might land on the ship. Oh. Oh, make a perception check.

Oh, is the merchant guy on board that killed the albatross? He was not a member of the crew. He was just there to see that the delivered goods were delivered. But he was still part of the operation. He was part of the operation, and there were a few of his men who helped. That guy's nose was broken, and he was left on the piers of the dock. The dock of the pier. And I got good luck for the spell on the blood. Probably bleeding out. Might be dead. 17. It's been ages since you've seen a bird. It's...

Been weeks and weeks and weeks. I don't know enough about nautical business to say that, like, you wouldn't see any birds on a sea voyage, but I imagine that there's a certain point where you get far away enough from land. Exactly. You're just not seeing anything. And that's been the case for two months now. So then I guess as we do voyaging, I would want to keep an eye out for birds to get a sense of where you're approaching. So now I'm just sort of keeping my eye out and kind of...

In case one does happen to show up, I would like to do something. Just let me know. I wonder what. I'd like to kill a bird in front of Barnabas. Oh, you red-headed bastard! And the whole campaign goes to shit. I knew it! I kid, I kid.

And your sea legs have really come to you. For whatever reason, maybe it's the cooler air, you're starting to feel like a real sailor in terms of being able to navigate without having to ask any questions and in terms of when things get rough. And none of you really hit heavy, stormy seas at this point, but even when they're at their lurchiest that you've experienced so far,

You're starting to get a sense for what you need to do in order to stay focused and stay, not healthy, not the right word, but-- Capable? Capable, yeah. Undistracted by motion sickness. Ah, well, at once this was quite taxing, but now I quite enjoy the time at the helm.

Everything else? This is...this is easier. Whether it be the cool air. Scrim, how are you? What? I said, Scrim! I said, how are you up there? Yes, the sky is blue! Excellent! You see something?

What? What? Do you need surgery? Brandy! I need more Brandy! Oh, I'm no help.

It's true, you've had almost nothing to do. But a warm belly, a full belly every night. That's a good thing. I don't really trust you or anything with a scalpel, I'll be honest. You got these big, meaty fingers. I don't have a knife. You can't hold a scalpel. I have a knife and a hand job.

Is that for the precision work? Put yourself where you would be. While in the kitchen, I want to-- butter gets stuck in the blender, and I want to-- Yum! -- get it out with my fingers. Yum! So what happens? Unfortunately, you're pulled into the blender. Completely? Oh shit! Oh, you're having stew, I suppose, as a side of the tree?

You're turned into a rabbit, rabbit-chino. How do you-- A rabbit-chino? A rabbit-chino, thank you. More like rabbit puree. Oh, rabbit puree. Everyone enjoys the meal. Lovely. And we continue on with the adventure. You can go now. Have fun!

It's for real, everybody, it's for real. You've been serving drinks. You've been making sure that people get fed. You have to run up and down the boards of this ship pretty frequently because people don't always eat in the dining room, but sometimes people say, hey, could I get a beer or could I get a grog or could I get a glass of warm milk before bed? Something along those lines. You have been noticing one particular gentleman, Corlys Garside,

He has been really digging deeper and deeper into the drink each progressive week. He still has been doing his duties okay, but he's been... The first night was three beers. The next night was three beers. Then three, then three, then four, then four, then four, then five, then five, then five. It's been steadily elbowing up in number.

So I would ask, as you with that knowledge, where do you guys find yourself on the 10th of the ninth month when things start to drop a little crazy? I'm in the damn bucket. I'm not happy about it. I yearn for Barnabas's hot brandy. You know what I mean? So he's in the bucket, or

Presumably. I'm in the, that's the luggage. I'm in the main mask bucket. I haven't moved. I'm in the damn bucket. I'm in the galley. I'm in the galley, man. I would be up on the top deck and I would be keeping an eye out for birds, but I would also be like kind of

If no one was around, I'd like, you know, carve another rune in just to kind of... If Yornir's like on the top deck below me, I would occasionally like throw something at him. Like, you know, like a little piece of debris. I would be, I'm a troublemaker and I'm not really, I'm not really doing my job. You're not looking out for anything? I mean, I occasionally look around, but there hasn't been anything for months, right? I mean, like, and I, Scrim is the kind of person that he doesn't give a fuck about real work.

Right? He's very much like, I'll look around occasionally, but nothing's changed for months or weeks. Yeah, exactly right.

So I'm doing my job half-heartedly while I'm torturing your near end. I always ignore it. Well, I might miss, right? It's a long drop, right? I'm doing my detailed cleaning of the bathroom. Even though the captain said that you need to clean up after yourself, nobody does. And I just can't stand for that. So the bees help me. Once a week, we go in and do a deep, detailed cleaning.

and try and make it spick and span. I would also add that as you were making the bathroom spick and span, you realize you haven't seen Horlitz Darkseid for most of the day. Normally, you'd have had him for four, five, six years. Well, he's the one who pisses all over the floor more than anyone else, especially lately. Yeah, it reminds you of him, the fact that there are fewer piss drops on the toilet seat this particular evening. LAUGHTER

Well, shit, I should go check on that guy. Well, I've got to finish cleaning up the bathroom first. I'm just going to keep cleaning it, at least for a while. And then once I feel like it's to a good point, I'll go check in his room. And instead of bringing a...

which is what he normally likes, I'm gonna bring, I'm gonna meet up with Taishan, get some of his tea, add a little bit of honey to it, and bring that to him. Okay, so you've got a cup full of honeyed tea, and you're making your way down. On the, for lack of a better word, second floor of this ship, where the hammocks are, you look to his hammock, and it is empty. Well...

Someone's gotta drink this tea, so I guess I'll do it. And I just start drinking tea. I don't know where he is. I'm gonna go let Yornir know.

That is unusual. And I'll go upstairs and let Yorneir know. Hey, Yorneir, you're the surgeon. Yes? Do I go to you if someone's missing or only if they're broken? I don't know how my skills would necessarily be locating someone, but if you locate them and they need surgery... That's what I'm worried about. He's been drinking a lot.

And now he's gone, so... How long has he been gone? When was the last time you saw him? Um... Yeah. It would have been the previous night. Oh, it's been about a day. Ooh. Well, chances are that if he fell overboard, he's certainly dead.

So he won't need surgery. Yeah, I mean, that stands to reason, but if he's just on the ship somewhere, but he's messed himself, and he's... I mean, he's been drinking a lot. I've been there. I'm not doing anything. Would you like me to help you find him? I mean, that's why I came to you. You're the surgeon. You haven't done anything this entire trip. That's right, but just...

You just stand here and let Scram throw things at you. Please, need some kind of entertainment. I just do my thing. Hey, Scram! Did you say brandy? No! Okay! My head peeks back into the bucket. I disappear. Oh!

I'm gonna cop it. All right, guys. Scrooge is such a scape. Incredible. Let's look for the drum.

I checked his hammock and he wasn't pissing himself in the bathroom so I'm not sure where he could be well let me take a look at his hammock perhaps I will find something oh can you look at his hammock and know which way he went no I might be able to perhaps he'll get clues of what he's been up to I probably should have done that when I was down in his hammock it's been so long since I've tracked anything I'm done up and forgot how to do it

I will go down and I'll have Queenie point me to his hammock, because I probably don't know the guy or care about the guy. You may have learned none of the names of these two. They ignore you, you ignore them. We're all happy for it. I love how loose you are. This is the final hammock on the rightmost side there. Oh.

Down this way? No, like that way. Not in the actual recreation room, but there. So I'm going to start-- there's no core list there. I'm going to dig through his possessions and start ruffling through everything. And I would like to use my ranger-ness to try and see if I notice anything off, because I forgot I was a ranger. Investigation, and I don't know what that means. Like, I guess survival?

I don't know. Try to track him. Yeah, try to track him. Let's give, okay, you're going to try to track him. Yeah. That's different. I still think it would be investigation, right? Sure. Whatever you tell me it is is what it is. Keep it, these dice are hot. Yeah, agreed. 19 rolling like hot fire. Yeah, and cool as hell. 17. With a 17 and a 19, you start to go through his things.

Just brutally opening up satchels, pulling him, finding a book or two, finding additional changes of clothes, finding what weapons he might need on him, should there be a pirate situation or something along those lines. Traditional crewmate fodder. You don't find anything unusual that would speak to a disappearance or anything along those lines. As you're... Yeah, go ahead. Um...

I'll turn to Queen Yeltsin and say that there's nothing out of the sorts. Well, I'm just checking down under his hammock and along the floor to see if I see anything interesting. With a 17, there aren't any tracks. I would think it'd be very difficult on a boarded deck level, like on a ship, where you'd be able to see footprints or anything, especially even fresh.

It's a mystery. You aren't able to find anything. - Well, I didn't really know him that well anyway, so we should probably just go make sure Scrim's okay.

Well, I think we should check the rest of the ship. I mean, at this point... I've already looked in the bathroom. It goes two places. He's asleep in his bed or he's pissing on the floor. He doesn't really go anywhere else. Well, I'm going to go check the bills if you'd like to come. Where's that? It's the very bottom of the ship. It's real dark down there, Yornear. I know, but it's fine if there are two of us. And it gets colder down there, too, because that's the part of the ship that's under the water.

Do you need a cloak, though? Some kind of cloak? Do you have an extra one you can give me? You can just use mine. I'm used to the cold. It looks real heavy. Can you carry it while I wear it?

Yes. All right, I'll come with you. And so I'll take my cloak off and I'll wrap Queenie and I'll just pick her up. Oh, wow. We'll just- You're real warm. And I'll walk down to the- I'll walk through the whole kind of, you know, basically do like a once over of each deck of the ship and then go all the way to the bottom. When you reach the- Go ahead. I have a question. Yeah. Is Yorner literally like

like bent at the waist all the way down. I'm like at least hunching. How tall are you? Eight feet. Holy shit. Yeah, I would say the first week you found out all of the places where you could get your head. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. The hard way. I would say that the equivalent would be Gandalf walking in Bilbo Baggins. Oh, Baggins. Ooh! That's what I do. I assure you, it's quite cool.

Yeah, that's what it feels like. Now, that being said, the bilge is considerably shorter when it comes to its height. Only Scrim and Queenie would be able to walk in the bilge without having to duck in general. Fully erect. Even then, they're still a little bit...

I can walk through the build fully erect. Yes, yes. So could Queenie, of course. You're an Ellis Coombs. Of course, of course. Without saying. Mr. Coombs has a lot of time in the privy. I'm Ellis Coombs! He has one giant arm. He's like my father. Yeah.

He's always like, hey, Barnabas, what's in that shell? He's also the saltiest of all the crewmates. Get the fuck away from me. You don't make it into the bilge, however, all the information that I gave you. You pull the hatch up and just there... There it is. No, the bilge is the...

Bottom, bottom, that too. We don't make it there. Oh, my fault. It's as you are attempting to descend. Uh-oh. Where's the ladder? Right here. Oh, yeah, there's the hatch. Oh boy, okay. You can see-- Right by Sprim's room. Corliss is dumped down the stairs. Ooh! And he is crumpled at the bottom, clearly unconscious.

And Hanska called it. He's at the bottom of the stairs. He's at the bottom of the stairs. I immediately rushed down. Oh, Queen, let me put you down. He's in trouble. Let me help him, please. And I'll set him down and I'll kind of rush down and I'll see. I knew it. I'm basically, I'm just going to do a full check, like a check his pulse, kind of do a once over, look at his face, see what he's feeling. The game is afoot. Make a medicine check.

That is where I am a wiki. See, I used these other dice I bought at Gen Con and they suck! That is where I am a wiki. That is where I am a wikable wiki. Uh... A wiki.

Medicine is a nine. With a nine, you can tell that he is breathing, and he is unconscious, but without, given the darkness that it is, there's no, like, cisterns or lanterns or anything like that in the build. Without more light, you have no idea what's happening.

He's not dead though. What the condition is, he does not appear to be dead. It's the best you can tell. I'm going to immediately pick him up and I'll walk up to the top of the steps and I'll look down at Queenie and I'll say,

Probably had a drunken fall. Let me take a look at him. We should get him to wherever it is that you do the surgeries, just in case you gotta remove parts of him. That is exactly my plan. And I'm going to walk and take him to the surgery room, to the whatever it's called. You take a walk. Sickbay. It is the first, like,

the first frost, it's chilly. And it wasn't until you went down the build that you really realized that, like, the...

condensation on the inside of this ship is actually even starting to itself change the color of the wood to that white frosty gray color. And you take him to the medical area? Yep. Okay. What are the rest of y'all doing? Especially Scrim. I'm going to go first. I'll be right back. No, I'm fucking with you. I'll give an answer, I just gotta-- What time is it?

I want to make sure that I'm not... I would say that it's well past cooking hour. Okay, okay. It's 10.30, 11 at night. I would have... God, I forget his last name. We should have written it down. Roland, I would have him basically... Stonebridge. Stonebridge. I'd have Mr. Stonebridge. Mr. Stonebridge, you keep that oven stoked and you keep peeling them potatoes. I'll be right back.

And I would have gone up to the top deck to smoke my pipe and perhaps converse with Mr. Fire Blossom. And I'd also probably bring my drum, where I would have probably been teaching sea shanties to a lot of the crew and maybe leading around. This late at night, and it's not every night, but your drum has become something of a siren call where, oh, I hear the drum. And occasionally crew members will come to hear...

the learn shanties, the teach you shanties of their own. A few of them have their own instruments, 100%. You're starting to think it might turn into one of those kinds of nights. And Taishen, I guess you are joining him? I would love to be there. Oh, Barnabus, excellent. The drums in play.

I'll just say, at one point, I loved the Soongi horn myself, but I left it back at the mainland, so... That makes me very sad to hear about your Soongi horn. Every time you mention it...

We would love to have an accompaniment, but you know the words. Oh, I do? Going down to Makani. Makani. Me boys going down to Makani. We're homeward bound from the Mamut ground. Go!

♪ Going down to Ohmakami ♪ - Wait, you gotta work on it, man. - You know, next night maybe. We'll be in harmony. - Again, again, two other gentlemen, Wade and Pendleton, make their way over to you. - Oh, Dirk will see what he knew was in your heart. - You can hear the sound of music as you pull Corliss down.

I would say that I'm still in the bucket. You've heard this music a number of times. Yeah, and I hear the faint roar of the crowd, if you will, and I feel sad that I'm not there, and I'm flipping the accursed coin, the damned coin.

And I'm singing a song that Barnabas taught me, but I'm doing it in a way that's... The lyrics are clearly wrong, but I smile at my own cleverness. And I'm half-heartedly singing a song. There once was a ship that ran aground, and the name of the ship was the Morabound. And just passing time as...

I am jealous that I'm not down with the rest of the crew. And I hate the fucking coin that I'm flipping. I'm mad, I'm mad about it. - Every flip you feel like you get a little bit angrier. - 'Cause if I can't get rid of it,

Corlys hits your surgery table, and you can tell that his fall must have happened perhaps in the afternoon. It's been quite some time. Make an additional medicine check. He's not wearing the usual coats and help that other folks might be wearing. There we go. That is a fed tea.

Now with enough light to see, you can see that his skin is starting to turn blue. He's definitely unconscious from the fall. He's got a hard gash on one hand, what is clearly a number of bruises. A contusion. A contusion on his head. Exactly right. Thank you kindly. This is a collaborative storytelling process. And... It's hard for you to see any of these things because the table, of course, the height that it is. All you can see over the table are the tips of my ears. Oh, God.

How's it going up there? But this man is not in any danger of dying necessarily, but is clearly in need of immediate medical attention. I would like to inspect...

him and try to get a sense of what kind of attention he needs if he's going blue. I want to like try to stick my fingers down his throat to see if there's any blocking his airways and if there's not then I guess try CPR if I could or at least just trying to kind of do what I can to

Okay. You start to do exactly that. There's nothing blocking his airway. He seems to have been just knocked out effectively, but what's most concerning is how cold he is. And it's as you were pushing down on his chest that he... Oh, shit. No fucking way. Are you okay? Where am I? Fine, we're safe. Cool.

Healthy, I think. Are you cold? Queenie, Queenie, and I'll hold Queenie in. Pick me up by my ears. Queenie has a coat and half of it's behind her. She's just walking up. Please may I have my cloak back, please? Yeah, sure. I just pull it up. I guess. And I try to wrap him. Does this help? Do you feel warm? I think you gotta get naked and cuddle with him. Ah!

I ain't joking. That's not the least of what I've ever heard of. Yeah, no, when someone's got hypoplasia or whatever is going on with him, you gotta get naked and get on top of him. Yeah, that's the top, man. Someone go get Scrim! He starts to push his hand up and it comes away this very tacky, sticky blood now that's been pooling for who knows how many hours. He's clearly going through shock.

He's freezing. Something is... Not who knows, but he's going through hypothermia. No, I'm serious. You gotta get naked and get next to him. I'm not getting naked and getting next to him. There's something about body heat. It's the best way to make someone

Grab a lantern off the wall, if there are lanterns hanging off the wall. Oh yeah, yeah, you can see actually where I notified that there are ensconces, so there's two on this side. So yeah, there are definitely lanterns on this side. So I'm gonna grab one. Here, take a lantern. I'm gonna pull one off the wall, and I'm gonna basically put one kind of at his core, and then try to wrap my cloak around him. Yeah, hold him, just hold him like that.

Don't put him down. I'll do what I can, you're very close. Don't squeeze him too hard, he might shatter his bones. And I'm gonna put my hands on him, not try to squeeze him so hard so that I shatter his bones. Unfortunately, he fell. He's dead, actually. Quick word giant, and my hands are blown. Oh, you're putting a curse on him, where's the curse?

Sort of white, very, very, very kind of light blue as I cast Cure Wounds on him. Nice. You cast Cure Wounds on him. Just as a way to try to kind of give him some kind of healing. Between that and the warmth that you make, I'm going to ask you to make a medicine check just for funsies. Does it matter how many HP I heal for him? I would also ask you for an HP. Oh, that's actually pretty good. Big money. Let's go. 11.

11 money on HP. 11 HP, and then my... Let's use one of these. Get all these dice, Kimma! Natural 20. Let's go! What did you do, Kimma? What did you do? 27 for your Madison check. Wow! Wow.

It's obviously not just the lantern and the rapping that's happening. It's the fact that you are pouring your magic into this person. His cheeks go from pale to flush. You can actually physically see it like a wave going up and across his face, down and over his arms, presumably down and through his torso, past his waist and into his legs. He...

Question for the group: Does Cure Wounds cure drunkenness? I don't think it does. No, that's Lesser Restoration. But not Cure Wounds. My head! That's nice. What did you do? Ow!

Oh, my feet! Is he clearly drunk? He's very intoxicated. Even after the hours he's spent unconscious, you can tell that he is still on the edge of unconsciousness just from the alcohol that's still in his system. Not something that would have been pushed away by the magic of Cure Wounds. How much did you serve him?

- Oh, I think he had 10 today or 11. He had 10 yesterday, so it could have been 11 today. He's been going up. - I've been sneaking him too. - Oh. - It's a miracle he's still alive. - I know. - My boots, can you, my boots. - Do you want me to take them off you? - It still hurts, why? - Your boots hurt you?

and I'm gonna go to, 'cause you're holding him, I'm gonna go to his boots. You start to unlace the boots and pull one shoe off the next shoe. Okay. And you are staring at cruel, blackened toes. Oh no, you're-- The Cure Wounds certainly cured what is alive on this person's foot, but in particular, one foot is

dead from the actual knuckle of the foot up.

Yornir? Yes? You're gonna wanna take a look down here at his feet. They look fine, I think, so don't worry or anything. You just relax. But Yornir, you might wanna look at these. I go down to his feet, and I'll take a look to see how many toes I think are dead versus, I can say. Yornir? As you are confronted with this new information, I'd be curious what the rest of us are doing.

Are we all just laughing and dancing? It's been probably 20, 30 minutes since Yornir and Coiny started to search down into the bowels of this ship. Yeah, I'm salty that Barnabas hasn't sent me any warm brandy. We'll roll the old... I'm pissed! Because I can hear them partying! Chariot along and we'll roll the old chariot along. I'm stewing.

I'd be leading around. Okay, okay. I just wanted to check in. Now being confronted with this information. You're near. Yes? Are you gonna have to cut his feet off? Where on the feet? At least to the toes. To the knuckle? Yeah, to the knuckle, to the knuckle. The good news is no, he will keep his feet.

I will, however, cut his toes off. How's he gonna be able to stand? In boots. Oh, all right. What's happening, why? It is okay. What do I have as far as implements go? Do you think now would be a good time to get him more alcohol? What does that? You think now would be a good time to get him more alcohol?

I have something better, I think. Okay. I will open up the chest. I'm not usually having access to this, but I'm just going to take it. I'll say there are the metal instruments that you would imagine there being in there. And you've really familiarized yourself with this room. With no surgery to do, you know the ins and outs of this space. And in here, there's a chest of perhaps four or five healing potions. There's a nervelism kit. There's a...

a variety of different metal instruments for the purpose of surgery, including saws, tongs, gripping devices, that kind of thing. I will pull out a vial or a little bottle of laudanum or any kind of other opium that they might have on the ship in the, in its chest. And I will say, Queenie, will you assist me?

Anything you need, Yorna, you just tell me what to do. I have my honey stirrer if we need to have him bite down on something real hard. I think that would be useful. I'm really gonna hate having his teeth marks in it, but it's alright. Or just that maybe you just join me at...

his face. I will take, I will un-shoot the cap and presumably it has some kind of like dropper top, you know, dropper. I will take a drop and I will place two drops. I will open his mouth and say, just keep this under your tongue and you will feel quite a bit better. And I will put two drops under his tongue and close his mouth. What was the tape like?

It tastes just kind of like an astringent kind of chemically taste. Okay. Sort of, not always citrusy, but it's really kind of...

Like bad medicine, you know, just that kind of gross... Yeah, yeah, yeah, that sort of artificial feeling to it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And as you're dropping in and you need some music, you're hearing above, you're still hearing the chanting that you've come to grow very used to. You hear this very loud pop sound somewhere else in the ship, but you continue to maintain attention towards the...

I probably wouldn't pay it any mind, and you know, having a lot more implements, and I mean, this is a Loft Wars, normally where I'm from. I will take one of the bolt cutter style implements.

And I will go to his feet. I'm gonna sit on his chest. Seeing this. I'm gonna sit on his chest and block his view. And I'm just gonna look down at him and talk to him. Queenie, the wood in his mouth, please. I'm gonna go ahead and put this honey stirrer in your mouth here and I'll reach into my little honey pot and I'll put some honey on it. It's gonna taste real nice, probably for only a second or so. Can I have an ale later?

You can have as many as you want, honey. And I'm gonna put it in his mouth. And once I feel like the opium has done its effect, I will start snapping him off with these big metal, you know. Get as deep in there as you feel that you need to get. Make another medicine check. Oh, gosh. Oh, no.

- Twist it. - Twist it, twist it. - How many twists are you gonna use, one or two? - Just one. - Just one. - I think just one. - I think just one. - I rolled a natural one. - Thank you, thank you. - Thank you. - So I can't re-twist this, it is what it is. That's better, six. - Better than one. - My medicine's pretty good. - It's five better. - Medicine is seven. - So it's 13.

13. Between the opium, your dexterous sniffing. Does he get anything because I'm helping? I am sitting on his chest and biting my honey stick. So if that was in van, Andrew would have gotten a six and a one, and then I can... Honestly, I set the DC to 10 because you already dropped him opium. Instead of advantage, better DC. You're not hitting the right wires. I like that.

Everything's coming free. He'll feel it in the morning, but you don't even see him react. He's just sort of like smiling with this piece in his mouth and then by the time you hear the last snip, there's no reaction from him. He's just seems sleepy. You poor sweet thing. And I'll just sort of wrap his feet in the mud. Can you bring me his boots, please?

Sure, and I'm gonna hop down off of his chest and grab the boots, and then I'm gonna use my bunny hop to hop back up onto the table and hand you the boots. And I'll slide his boots on, and I'll tie him up real tight. I'll say, "Can you see him in the morning? "Keep an eye on him when he wakes up." Is he even gonna be able to walk tomorrow? You try to keep him in that hammock and leave his boots on. I don't want them seeing it, they're messing with it. All right, I'll do that.

I'll take real good care of him, Yornie, I promise. I feel real bad. 'Cause I was cleaning up the bathroom when I realized I hadn't seen him and I continued. If I had just got to him maybe a couple hours sooner, maybe his toes wouldn't be gone. Do you think it's my fault? It is certainly not your fault and... Well, that makes me feel better, but I still think it's partially my fault. It is his fault for getting himself in this situation.

He did not take the coldness of the night seriously, and he put himself in this state. Do not feel bad, this is the natural way in the Arctic. Well, he must be going through something real rough to be drinking as much Sears. This might be true, but there are consequences regardless of what you're going through. We ain't got no toes! Did I cut off every single toe?

No, he still has these two on his right foot. Okay. Oh, thank god. To be fair, I didn't cut off every bone. Oh no, but you left the ugly ones. I only cut off what was dead. That was most of them. Anyway, will you help me get him into his hammock? I can't carry him all on my own. We'll get him all warm, and can he keep that furry blanket thing that you got on him now? That is right.

So I'll wrap him up real good and I'll almost sort of full-blown like, uh, like see him in one of those sleeping bags you can like zip up and just get rid of. A mummy bag. You, uh, use like a leather cord or something. Yeah, and I'll just sort of like tie him up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I will place him in his hammock on his side. He's on your side in the hammock as you feel. I'll put him on his back while I try to turn his head inside.

Should we elevate his feet? Does that do anything for him? This is as much as we can do for him. All right.

Knowing that you'll likely have to check in in the morning to see how things progress and that this is going to become a part of your daily routine, Corliss is left passed out in the hammock. As you are walking out of the actual door, I will say, you get a cobweb in the mouth just hitting you in the face, almost impossible to see. And then you are able to put the...

- Barnabas. - The conscious body of Corlys Darkseid into his hammock. - I do not tell Barnabas about the spider webs. - Do you tell me? - Nope.

I don't mention it. What was I saying? Nothing. There's nothing wrong. There's nothing wrong. Do you eventually go upstairs to join the merriment, or do you find yourself rest? I think I would pull up a stool, and I would just sit next to Corlys and keep an eye on him for the next few hours. Um...

And basically just provide him warm things to drink and... I would go back into the sickbay and I would open the lantern and I would take the tools that I use and kind of hold them over the flame, just to kind of keep things safe and sort of clean everything down. And yeah, then I would come out and I would go to clean the night's flame. What do you do with the toes?

That's a good question. I mean, that's an important question. Presumably there's some little waistband. I just throw him the waistband. Which would ultimately go overboard, right? I mean, like... Yeah, and eventually you just throw it. Yeah, you throw it. It's biodegradable. Thank God. Don't want to harm the environment. How well would, like, human feet do in a compost, do you think?

Very well. I mean, it's just... It would just be rotten flesh. It would decompose. Is it rotten if it's frostbitten? Wow. It would eventually rot, right? I have questions about that, but... As long as it was... Now that it's warmer than, like, freezing, right? It would be...

It's weird that his toes were... Anyway, I would clean everything up really well. And I would go to Queen and I'd say, I think he's fine for the night if you want to join the others. I think that you should let everyone else know to be careful when going all the way downstairs. It's clearly very cold down there. And if something happens and you're by yourself, you could lose toes or fingers or anything else. So they need to know.

I can tell them. Should warn everyone. It's cold down there, I wasn't wrong. Why was he that-- did-- was the hatch already open? I said that you opened the hatch. Right. And it was closed when you found it. I would say that you either presumed that it was closed on purpose, or that it fell closed as he tripped down this path, doing whatever he was doing going into the village.

I will let them know in the morning when their heads are clearer. But in the meantime, I will just check to see if there's anything else that I can find where he fell. I don't know if it's a good idea for you to go down there by yourself, because if you fall unconscious for some reason, I can't drag you back upstairs. So, you think you can maybe go get Barnabas or Tashi? I will be fine. Don't you worry.

I'm already worried. Just keep an eye on him with his fun. I can't keep an eye on everyone all the time. And that's why I will be fine. And so I will turn with another word and I'll go down back to where he fell. As you do, make a perception check. Spider attack! We knew there were bananas on this ship! Twelve.

I knew it! As you're walking down from that side, you would make it to the entrance that's just at that door that leads into the cargo hold area.

Right here. Oh, is that where you go down? The fastest distance would be that way. Yes, yes, I would go right here. I would know that. Okay, yes, and then you go down a level. To here. To here. And through the open door, out of the periphery of your eye, you can see what was a hogshead barrel has burst open, and there's what appears to be ice just melting on the ground. Knew it!

It doesn't make sense for his feet to be frozen. Okay, I approach the barrel and-- You approach the barrel. I'll grab the lantern off the wall and I'll walk up to the liquid and I'll kneel down and I'll look at the liquid and I'll try to, I'll grab a little bit and taste it and see if I can get a sense of what it is. Oh god, you're gonna die, it's poison.

Just licking shit. I swear you're gonna burst out of his chest. Another 12. It's ice, it's water. It doesn't seem to have any sodium in it. It just appears to be fresh water. Do I get this sense of, based on sort of how cold it is in here, where I am currently, and my experience living in the Arctic, does it feel like it's un-

I should not have frozen, expanded, and burst a keg in this temperature. Is that weird or is it, well, clearly it's just cold. I would say that, I don't think you need to roll to know that it's starting to get cold enough that other barrels full of water might be at risk of bursting. Oh, it is cold. And it's starting to get bitter cold. Not freezing cold, but bitter cold.

It is that cold. Bitter cold is starting to get into the 15, 20 degree action. Fahrenheit. Fahrenheit. So it's beyond freedom. Freedom units.

I will notice that that's kind of weird. I will check the rest of the hold to see if there are any other burst barrels. Okay. You do a once around and there don't seem to be any burst barrels. You know that many of the barrels that are water are a level above you.

there have been times when you need to go over and get a scoop or what have you. I will approach this hatch where he fell. And I will take a look around, see if I notice anything weird or off, and then I'll work my way down if I don't see anything. Make an investigation check. Ooh, let's go! 21. You see a...

You see how he could have slipped. This particular stare is a little warped. And you could see, okay, yeah, I can understand walking down, especially if drunk, for whatever purpose, a person might be able to slip. What is unusual is that you know that there was this contusion, this matted blood on the back of Corlys' head. And at the bottom of the build, where that pool of blood might have been, it is...

not the way that it was left, which was a pool. It now seems to have marks in it, shapes, scrapes. It seems to have been pulled off of the wood almost, and all that's remaining is the stain and the smear of this blood against the bottom of this ship.

I'll walk down the steps. And duck, right? I've gotta be hunched, like basically barefoot all the way. I mean, you're like duck walking. You're a literal giant. I mean, I wouldn't be scared if I was him either. I don't know how, I haven't decided if it's three or four feet, but like either way. I'm like on my knees almost crawling. You might as well almost be a marine crawler. And I'm gonna lift the lantern to see if I can see any sign of spiders or otherwise. Make a perception check.

- Toasted. - It's 10. - I think it's fine. - Your perception is so high where if you twist, you'll probably crush it.

But it depends on how badly you're worried about getting spider bitten. We've gotten a good amount of twists. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I want to see the monster. That's one. So that was worse. But you get to choose which one you want to use. So you use the better one. So you get three. Where's the culture? Oh, here we go. I got two. Do we pull any others out? Are we good? Do we pull one out for my last one? That's what I'm asking. No, we're good. I don't want to pull one out. I'll grab one more. All right. Thanks, guys. You guys are great. Thank you. We're up to date.

It's holding up the land for me. It turns solid. So don't die or anything. That's the plan. You can see the light doesn't reach the other end of the ship. It's just flickering yellow wooden plank in the darkness. You perceive no movement, no smell, just the extreme bitter cold of this environment.

You can see why in a few hours someone might naturally have been affected by hypothermia in this space. Bullshit! Do I get it? The markings through it, does it feel like tracks? Does it feel unnatural? Does it feel like some kind of critter? Lowering down with the lantern, you look and with a three, I would say it looks like a clumsy hand tried to pull the blood off of the wood.

Like a five-fingered human hand. Like something that has appendages. Of the blood. I do not like this, Derek. In the time that I lifted him off, took him away,

And then I came back in that period of time. I mean, the time that it took you to give him opium and get him to-- It was an hour. I mean, it was a long time. We had a good time. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Yeah, I will head back up to the-- probably to where at least where Queenie is. Okay. Queenie is dead. No.

Oh god. What do they do? The ghost! The first one is a nightmare wait, and then it's finally cool. Real fast. I will kind of lead down to Queenie, and I will sort of, in kind of like a whisper so that nobody else hears us, there is something not natural about Queenie.

the situation where he fell. What do you mean? Meaning that something in time between us finding him and me just going back down there, clawed at the block and grabbed at him. I don't think I understand what you're saying. Like, something is trying to get rid of the evidence that they, that he was bleeding down there?

- What I mean to say is, have we seen a single soul down here? Is everybody up top deck? - Everyone's up top deck at this point. No one's sleeping in any of the hammocks. It's a late night crew. Most people are perhaps in the recreation space, playing gambling games at this late hour. But I would say folks have heard the music and have decided to join in. Captain tends to stay in his quarters most days.

Will you come with me? You want me to go down there with you? All right, I'll go. And did you mention that we hadn't seen the big seller from Jorah? Oh, Mylan, he tends to keep to himself. You haven't seen him.

for most of the evening, but that's not unusual. He might be on the poop deck just looking out the back of the ship. He tends to be a very stern and concentrated individual. Solitary. From what you can tell. Very solitary, thank you. You're quite a bit smaller than I am, so I'd like you to at least-- Says who?

All you're gonna say is nature. Oh, all right. I'd like you to maybe come down with me and you can get a closer look at-- Are you scared and you just want me to come with you so you don't feel lonely? Please. I mean, you don't have to play into the size thing. If you're scared, you can just tell me that. I'll come. Scared is not the right word. I know it is. Let's go, Yornir. I won't tell anyone. All right, well, just please come with me.

And I'll lead Queenie down and back down to the bilge. You find yourself at the bottom of the ladder, both of you, and Yornir is hunched down and you, standing tall, are able to see the same thing that he's seen. Unchanged, Yornir, you would notice from the time that he saw it last. Smeared and not as much blood as there was when you first left it. And you see the same.

Can I inspect it to see if it looks like it's being wiped away? Or if it looks like it's-- Can I, like, Ranger look at it to see if there's anything that I can determine that's different than what Yrenir could determine? Ranger look at it. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, I don't know. I don't know. I don't think it would work either. With my skill set as a ranger-- That's why we're having this conversation. That's what this whole session's about.

What rule am I asking for? I think it's... Survival. I think it's reasonable. Yeah, give me survival. But don't let me tell you how to run your game. 23? Yeah. You lean down and Yornir holds the lantern just close enough that you get a real sense of it. This...

The pattern looks like some sort of, not hand, but creature actually was able to arrive and you can see these almost like kiss marks. Like Kravoskis? Like it's been sucked away from the wood. The same way a popsicle would look after you finished a red cup. There is some blood sucking hooligan on this ship, Yorneir. You see them little pucker marks?

His name's Tysham. Whatever was putting its little lips up against this was sucking that blood straight out the wood. Is this an animal? Well, how am I supposed to know? It could be an insect. It could be an animal. It could be a person with really small lips. Uh... I will, um... But I fear for us being down here, they could put that little sucker right into us and just... sloop us.

I would say at this point, the rest of you, that a gentleman is coming up. It's time for your night watch to be over. Oh, good, because I was going to ask you if I'd ever been caught for shirking duties before. Are you asleep? No, I was going to just bail and go to the party. You have a bittersweet relationship with the Crows' Nest at this point, because on the one hand, it's...

It's lonely. It's boring. It takes a long time. You never see anything. You don't get to interact with anyone. But I'm also not doing any real work. But there's no other...

Ever on the top of the main mess. It's only you. There's no other on the top of the main mess that you would ever see. You seem free from any eyes that might be looking at you or any shadows that might play tricks with your mind. But I've been relieved of my duty before. You have been relieved and you're being relieved now.

Well, I zip down the fucking rope and I go party with my boys, Taishen and Barnabas. You land on the deck surface and you are about to run up when you see that their last song is being sung. It is after midnight at this point. People are starting to disperse and think about making their way down, perhaps having one more drink. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Barnabas and Taishen, you see Scrim run up. No, the party's just starting now! Mr. Savagotch?

"I'm the boss! No, I just got done my duty!" Scram, welcome! Welcome! Cup of tea? No, what do you like? Mr. Sabascotch, are you off duty? Yes, run! Well, you know, I got something better for you, my friend. I have to say, these past months I have been impressed by how seriously you're taking your topman duties. And nary have I seen such a fine topman. And so I have taken something from the

Captain's private stock. It's better than rum, at least I think you like this a little bit better. And I'll reach down into this bag that I'll have and I'll pull out a bottle of whiskey

and it's this dark brown bottle that I would have, if this isn't the case, that the captain would have whiskey in his private stores. Oh, no, no, no. This room right here? Yeah. That is all stores. Yeah, and I'm making his meals too, right? So it's a bottle, and you'll see that there's this beautiful red label with this crimson spider on it.

Of all the sweet gods of the upper plains, please tell me that at the very least, Barnabas and Tyshen, you will not go to bed now. The party can just begin. You can teach us some new shanties. I'm running out of things to sing while I'm in the bucket. I'm about to. Young Roland still has time, and I'll relieve him. I'm planning on enjoying at least another hour or so up here. Even if it's just the three of us, we can get Queenie and we can get...

The big guy. You're in here. Yeah, that's his name. Oh, the bucket. Oh, it's just so horrible. Give me the whiskey. And you will see that it says red spider whiskey. I would take my big fucking knife and basically saber it to pop the cork. Make a quick dexterity check for me.

I hear that it's very spicy. If you get less than a five, you destroy the bottle. Oh, there's no way. I got a 14. Okay, it pops off and the glass and cork disappear into the ocean.

Ah, toss. And we'll save some for Queenie and Yornir. No big deal. Of course. Cheers. Tyshen, please. I'll raise my pipe to it. Yeah, and I just cheers his pipe and I cheers Tyshen and his thing. And I've got the bottle in one hand and where to? Below deck, please. I don't want to see the sea anymore.

I suppose we could. We could find Queenie and you were near. I would suggest at the very least we head to one of the recreation rooms. Either this one or this one, right? I'm tired of looking at the sea.

And I lead the way. As you make your way down, you come across an odd sight. You're not the only people who are making your way down. There are a few other crew members who are making their way to their hammocks as well. But you do see Yornir and Queenie hovering. Oh, you're no longer next to the hammock, are you? No, we're downstairs. Yeah, they're farther. I was going to say, we either had here or we had here, in which case they're even deeper, right? Like...

I was just suggesting one of the rec rooms, without having any idea where they are. Okay. Right? There's one of two rec rooms we could go to, whichever one's more private for the three of us, hoping that we'll run into Queenie and Noreen. So we're here-- Let me do some quick simulation amongst ourselves. Totally. Totally. Oh, Bonobos, I have to tell you, I am--

Words cannot describe the appreciation that I have for you. You've single-handedly helped me when I've been all alone in that horrible bucket. Of course, Mr. Zamascox. I owe you. I really do. If you can think of anything, I will pay you back someday. I promise you. You've given me one of the fine little simple joys in life. Oh, yeah. And on this voyage, that's all we could ask for. There's not much...

Gonna be left for us when this is all over. I'm certain of that. And Tyshen, I've missed your tea. Have you made any at all? Yeah, every night. Is it really so bad up in the crow's nest? You've made tea every night? Yeah. It's very lovely. We've been at sea for months. I haven't had your tea in almost a year. Ha!

That can't be true! Mr. Fogartblossom, is this true? No, I don't think so! I would have offered it to you, you may have-- I-- I understand what happened. I shouted up to you, asking if you wanted tea, and you shouted back down something about

"Wendy, and I thought you meant no. "And now I think you were asking for brandy. "It's dawned on me after all this time." "No, Taishen, no. "It's very clear which of two of you care about me." "It's me." "Oi, and I'm the one who provides actually what he wants, "which is whiskey."

But your tea is very lonely, I've been enjoying it. Thank you, I wasn't sure where you were going with that. That was about to be very hurtful. I was gonna make a quick perception check as you walk into the recreation. As we're making the perception check, I pull the bottle of the Fire Spider whiskey very close to me as I scowl. Red Spider, Red Spider, it's very spicy.

Perception? Oh! Kimma, I love you! Finally, he has a set of dice that don't let him down. You sounded like Grunkle Stan there. No, Kimma! I got pancakes! 13, 13. Perceptions? 22. Wow. Perception? Hold on. 18.

Neither of you notice this. Perhaps it's because you're too short. Well, I'm angry at Tyshen and I'm hoarding the whiskey out of myself. You're passing through into the doors into the recreation space. Barnabas, you're the first person. You make of this what you will, but you do notice that Corlys is unconscious and stitched up unusually.

Where is he stashed? He's in the hammock, effectively motionless. He's like cinched up. He's been cinched up like a sleeping bag would be. Zippers don't work in the banter, so I don't know if he's got a setting that well. Okay, yeah.

That was fucking... Yeah! Yeah! Holy shit! I don't know if you know the setting very well. What?

Oh, stand up. These are filthy cats. So I'll be walking by, and I'll say, the good thing about this, because we don't have any bananas on board, that that will be the only spider on this ship. I mean, it's not his normal bunk, but he looks cozy. I'm not going to stop him. You know what, Tysha, I've forgiven you if you'd like some of this fire spider stuff.

I don't know what you keep saying. It's spicy. It tastes good. I'd love some. Thank you. And I'm mortified I haven't brought in you tea every night. I just have a fear of heights that is difficult for me to conquer. And you were just very high up in the air. And I was worried about falling off of the netting and hurting myself. So thank you for your kindness. Mm-hmm.

That's why you're not in the rigging there, Mr. Fogarblossom. We all have our own roles on the ship. What's his name, Mr. Corliss? You would have called him Mr. Garside. What's Mr. Garside doing bundled up there? Again, it's not his bunk, but you didn't hear this from me, but he's a bit of a drunk. I hear people talk about it, but we all know, but we're all thinking of it. The point is, he's a drunk, okay? I'm just going to say it. We're all thinking of it, you know, yeah.

so that doesn't surprise me then you might just be laying here it's just fine isn't that your ears seal help it's your seal pelt right yes all right that's a little odd i mean i haven't seen people in days if not weeks or months you know i just live in a bucket at this point but i suppose that is joining a seal pelt oh i guess he got a little uh he got a little drunk and and mr your ear took care of him being the proper surgeon that he

is on this vessel. Speaking of, where is your near? Look, you know, you know, he's a very generous person and I'm sure Queenie is doing, you know, what she needs to do. She has got a very difficult job. She offered to switch with me and that was very kind, but it was also a second sentence. So I'm glad I didn't take that job. I'm sure they're doing their thing, right? They're very important people. I'm just happy to be off and I've got this, this lovely bottle thanks to Barnabas. And if anybody would like to play some cards,

I'm happy to deal. It can be a friendly game where you don't have to wager anything. Come on. As you are starting to consider gambling, you're in here. Queenie, what are you up to? I'm telling you. They're like these little tiny needles and at the end...

If there was a way for you to see tiny things, it would be actual human lips. And they stick to you and they start sucking and sucking and sucking until your blood just gushes out of your skin. You can hear how quiet it is. And that's what kills all the goats.

If anybody was wondering what a female forbis sounded like. You can hear the sound of waves are especially resounding and reverberating in this space now that there's no longer a beat of a drum or something in close proximity. Back in Yonah, they call it a chupacabra. Let me take a look. And it makes the goats flat.

That is a pain cake. I want to lean down and knowing what I know about animals from where I'm from, does it look like any kind of creature or animal that I would have ever encountered? Make a nature check and an arcana check. Ooh, nature? Uh-oh, arcana. Okay, all right, got you, fam. We'll keep you honest.

Both pretty good. Good and good. And I'm glad that it shook out better than it did. Arcana is 18. I can make more. And nature is 18. Wow. This doesn't feel like the actions of a beast or a mundane non-magical creature. Not a fan of that. This is not the work of...

That's what I'm telling you. The Chupacabra is like one of those, it's like not a real creature, but it's totally real. That means that it is somewhere in here. We should go, we should get out of here and get the others. Oh no, Yornir, what if it was stuck in here and we laid it out? We need to go right now. Have you seen anything strange on the ship since we cut off his toes?

I'm going to grab Queenie with one hand and lift her and put her on top of me. It's a get-again-that-mean. I can do it myself, Yornie. You just pick her up by the head like a Russian nesting doll. Exactly. I'm going to lift her out of the hold and put her on the landing. And I'm going to very quickly climb out and put the latch down. Okay.

And there is in fact a way to lock this latch, so if you wanted to do that, you'd be able to. Yes, yes, I'll lock it. He told me he doesn't want to lock it. The shape of an anchor and a little hitch, you're able to slide it in, and that's a decent security. And on my way off, I want to do a quick glance around the bottom of the bills to see if I get any sense of something being there. Make a quick perception check for me. Very good. 21. Very good. 21. Still quiet.

So I will close the latch, and I will say, "You need to find the others and let them know." If this thing

Probably the Chupacabra. If it's out for blood, we should keep an eye on... What was his name again? Corlys. We should keep an eye on Corlys, because his toes are bloody. It might be drawn to the spell. Smell. Sorry, my nose got real cold down there. When something is frostbitten, there's not really any blood anymore. It's sort of all...

Frozen. That's real gross. I think we should find Barnabos. I agree. I think that we should find the capable ones on the ship and... Okay, well then we should... Who are we going to find then if we're not going to go find Barnabos? I mean, we should find Barnabos, Tyshen, and Scrim. Oh, so we should find Barnabos and the capable ones on the ship. Yes. All right.

In a few minutes, you find yourself having made your way up. You can see that there are a number of different folks who have found their way into their hammocks at this point. Nearly all of them are full, except for the few people who have decided to enjoy a quiet night out on the surface of this ship. But you can hear mostly scrimmage.

from the recreation room towards the back of the rear of the ship. I'm a little boisterous. So we'll rush up with the rest of them. I'd be playing cards with Scrabble. I'm being completely scammed by... It's friendly, though. Okay, got it, got it. It was very much a friendly game, not for money, right, for fun.

Is it alright if we take five? Please, yeah. Yeah, let's do it. I think I've just given another quick bathroom break and I know that there's coffee brewing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Also, I know it's late and we don't normally do this, so I'm asking for your permission to continue. It's Friday. Yeah, it's Friday. We're deliberately going late. Okay. Let it fucking rot. We're in agreement. We're with you. Yeah, nobody going nowhere. I would say for sure when the three of us sat down to play cards, the expectation was that it was friendly, not...

you know, for pay for money, like the way I would try to scan the other people. Um, because again, we've got a certain relationship, right? Um, and we would just do our thing and keep it. Yeah, exactly. It's, uh, I'm the top man, you know, bend over. Yeah. I'll work the helm. Yeah. Ty Shen, you dropped a card. Uh,

I think Roland over there would like to join us for a bit of a game. Yeah, if that was the case, then we'd probably try to fleece him a little bit, right? Anybody who's an outsider, right? We have a special connection having been in prison for 90 days together. I don't know. I don't know. Picked up prison gambling. So what do we think this is?

I want to do a little pre-Adventress chill. I want to hear what you think it is. Meta knowledge, I think I have an idea. Okay. Well, yeah, what is it? What does Nikki think it is? I think it's a sturge. What is a sturge? They're like giant mosquitoes. Okay, okay. Little bloodsuckers with brabusci. Yeah, could they live in the cold, though? I mean, I guess why not? Why not? So I thought it was super weird that Cornelius' feet were frostbitten.

But then when Derek kind of said, like, it wasn't unreasonable for the barrel to have popped. I think it's because he was down there for so long, because you lose the heat in your toes first. Sure. And I'm sure drinking also doesn't help with your heat retention. Right. Or your circulation. Right. And so he had a wound, which means the blood's going to be rushing to his head, which is going to make it worse.

easier for him to be frostbitten. So I thought that was weird, but I think that it's, I think it's explainable. Right. Well, we think he was hit over the head by someone, right? Well, or something. So it sounds like, at least the way Derek described it, that he hit his head on the stair when he fell. Just as he fell. Um, and,

because he said that there was... Well, he said that there was... There was the blood in the spot where... On the step. Yeah. And then as he fell down the stairs, it, like, dragged and then pooled on the floor. And whatever was down there, potentially a Sturge, has been sucking up the blood. So I'm on Spider because...

Barnabo's when he's still a fuck-up of bananas. I swear to God, if it's a fucking spider, I'm going to lose my goddamn mind. It could be some horrific ice spider. Ice spider is a classic film. Is it? Yeah. Have you heard of a classic film? No. Ice spider? I just said that because it was in my brain. Well, you're near dead.

run into that. The cobwebs. The cobwebs. Ice spider! It's ice spider. The classic sci-fi film. My guess is in that barrel there were ice spider eggs. And they've been hatching and that pop, was it breaking out? I was also aware. Was there ice spider eggs in it? When he put down the barrel, originally it was like shaking. Ice was cold though.

That's what I thought it was. They might have hard eggs instead of-- They might have ice eggs. Oh, they have ice eggs! Oh my god, it's like the icy egg from Banjo-Kazooie! This is bullshit! I assume that they were basically smuggling more gold than we were aware of. That's what I thought, too. I'm still sticking to that. Why carry gold on the ship? Why even bring gold? They're stealing.

They're stealing. Oh my gosh. But why bring on this journey of months to go-- To get the fuck out of Wuzeh. You know, I-- They're stealing. That's fair. So I think they're basically pirates. But-- I don't think they're a merchant vessel, I think they're fucking pirates. Alternatively, if we think that we're gonna be up against, like, other people, like, racing towards this goal, maybe we're bringing something to waylay our opponents. True. Or if we-- Or all of that could also be bullshit.

If we're traveling with a bunch of pirates, it could be bullshit. I don't trust anything Derek ever says. No, Derek's a shady motherfucker. He's shady. So that's a good point, right? And why would this barrel of water be held on...

a deck lower than all the other water. Well, I just assume you're venturing around out of space, but I don't know. I don't know. Look, I'm trying to be reasonable. It seems intentional. Derek's an unreasonable human being. So I think Derek is also a fan of the sci-fi classic film Ice Fighters. He too. I swear to God.

if they're a fucking spider and there are no bananas and they're spiders, I'm going to lose my goddamn life. I will say from a meta knowledge, I wouldn't put it past Derek to fuck with you by just saying you ran into a cobweb. Oh yeah, for sure. Totally. It could just be for like a spooky moment. If I came, I'm like, here's the red spider. So for,

context. So the Red Spider is from, we were just like when Mace and Derek got here early and we were just goofing. Two and a half hours early. So we were riffing and just getting our voices and getting in character and Derek roleplayed some random guy. It was Red Spider. The Red Spider and I can't remember his name anymore. The Red Spider Ale. Red Spider Ale and everything was Red Spider. He was born a Red Spider man and he'll die.

And he was Red Spider Jim, was his name. So the whiskey named Red Spider is just purely... It was just me riffing, and because I had mentioned the spiders earlier.

And Barnabas very clearly doesn't like spiders. It all comes full circle. So N'Hazka says the creatures could have been set to ruin the expedition by competitors. Totally. Sabotage is high on the list, yeah. Red spiders at the new red herring. I don't know, Jax. He strikes a Jax, plus a quirk on the head and push him down. Oh my god. To get him interrupted by bolts. What if, and this is super meta knowledge. Because this is like, what if, and this is cheating.

But Derek had spiders on the mind because of fucking Ice Spider from the classic sci-fi film. Ice Spider. Ice Spiders. You always have to finish. And so that's why Derek said red spider. He was just riffing and he pulled it out of his brain. Because it was subconscious almost. There was almost subconscious. Yeah. But I feel like if it was a cobweb that you were like, oh, it's just a cobweb. It would be from like a tiny spider. Yeah.

If you went into a club with a gigantic spider, it would still be like... Are there spiders in my mood? Ice spiders? There could be. I mean, I don't know. No, that's normal. My point is that's normal. Mom it. I'm going to go mom it. Check Discord real quick. Capture the exact moment you became your character. Oh, no. Is it a screenshot? I hope not. I hope so. I'm going to laugh. Oh, my God. There's so much fan art. I'm like shitting my pants right now. Oh, my God.

Oh my god, Vertebrate Shake is so good! I am literally-- You're so good! So, the one of Scrim in the Bucket just fucking killed me every time. Hold on, I'm gonna make an icebound channel so that we have a place for this all. We should have one. I don't think I ever made one. I think it's an Edge of Midnight one. It's my bad for not creating it before this section. It's fine, whatever, let's drain it. I love all this art! When we started the campaign, it would've been two years old.

So good. There's now an Icebound channel. I'm geeking out so hard. Yeah, I... Oh, this is great. I have a giant erection for fan art. Oh, so Molly... So they do have a cowboy. They do. In their group, it's a dragon. Yes! Oh, I love that. I think, fun fact, that Tai Shen is the very first dragonborn in any of our actual proper campaigns, right? Outside of Ganji and Prime, right? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. But, like...

Producer Rick, can you cut that? Well, it's all on the break. We're going to cut that. Well, you know what I mean. Like, you know. It's going to be a yankazoo. You know what I mean. Did you say, this is so good! Oh my god. These are all your years being a god. Look at this guy.

Or is it just all under-created? Yes. You are just so fucking talented, it kills me. This is like my favorite. This is so good. Do you see Queenie down on the bottom of the kidney? Yeah, that thing, that little thing we just appeared here.

is so good you know what's great I went down the chowder rabbit hole on twitter today and panini is like one of the greatest characters of all time I miss chowder so much Mickey has no idea who panini is or chowder but that was your that was your fling flick character right

My Fienfeld character was inspired by Gazpacho, the Fingalian Mammoth, voiced by Dana Snyder. But Panini is like a little rabbit character, and I'm getting major Panini vibes. From me? Yeah, she's a little pink rabbit. Oh, I love that. And she's amazing. Holy shit, you are such a fucking talented artist. You're amazing! What an absolute...

I'm going to masturbate to these images. Don't fucking say that, Andy. He's a freaking fan already. He's fucking ruined everything. You're never going to fucking fan art again? I'm going to jerk off the sperm later. You're so awful. He's kidding. Andy found my greens holder.

Thank you, by the way, I think we missed Rosemoss Pocket. Oh, Rosemoss Pocket. I'm so sorry. Thank you. Happy birthday, Casey! Happy birthday, Casey! We love you! My name's old Rosemoss Pocket. I'm here to...

Shall we? To Moss, you puppy! Oh yeah. Yes, we shall. We shall, Derek. I can feel your yearning to continue. I am yearning to continue. I'd like to yearn. I wanna get to the bottom of this. Yeah, when are the spiders coming in? I'm ready for ice spiders. This is a mystery. Oh shit, it's confirmed! Would anyone like

You find yourselves in the second level recreation room. You see Yornir, Queenie, when you walk in, you see that they're playing cards and having a good game of it after a long day's work on the ship. And things seem quiet. Queenie! Yornir! Come have a drink, please! Join us, friends. My watch is done. We don't have time for drinks.

your near cut some guys toes off and there's a chupacabra in this boat. Wait, what? A capybara? What? Oh, they're real cute. I ain't never seen one in person, but I've seen pictures in books. Are those like sloth things? What? No, those are the ones that hang from the trees. I think you mean a lemur.

No, I know, I know. I've seen them in chocolate. Those are Ocelot. Oh, yeah. I just want to point out we've all skipped over the fact that apparently you and me have cut some poor fools. Yeah, he was fine. We're far enough south of that. We're cool enough now. It's just something that happens. No, you know that old drunk that's in the hammock right outside? We had to wrap him up like a burrito because he fell down into the bottom of the boat and his toes got black so we had to cut him off. All of them? Well,

You only left two of them. I believe, Queenie, we're burying the lead. What we have learned is that there was some kind of insectoidal arachnoid monster on the ship. Wait, wait, you think there's something, wait, like it harmed the guy that you cut the toes off? I don't know if it harmed him, but it certainly tried to consume its blood. Yeah, so that's what I meant about the chupacabra. There was some kind of like,

little sucker spots on the blood spot. It looks like some kind of creature was sucking the blood up out of the floor. And so we think there's a creature on the ship somewhere doing blood sucky things. - Okay, so aces are high, seven card low, who is in?

Are you not hearing what I am saying? There is a creature on board that we must destroy. Oh, you didn't say your acne, did you? I'm saying that none of that makes any sense, and I choose not to believe it because I have a nice bottle of whiskey, and I have good friends, and I have a warm fire, and I have a fresh set of playing cards. Every life on this ship is at risk if we do not...

Find this creature and destroy it. Do you understand? Should we warn someone? That's exactly what we're doing. We're warning you right now. I don't believe we need to warn anyone because I believe this creature was placed intentionally on this ship. We don't want to make a ruckus or a hoopla. Have we seen the little orange cat? No, I haven't seen him. Why? Why?

- Oh, no, the old Fiesta. - You know that the-- - The old Fiesta, that was her name! - The orange cat is very much a fan of Fenton, his owner, and he'll do tricks, you know, he can do high five, he can do a shake.

That sort of thing. He'll do jump up. The last time you saw Fenton was the last time that you saw the cat during the hootenanny that you guys were in. So not that long ago. So Fenton went to bed along with Fiesta. He's got an alibi. Okay, no, never mind. Oh,

- We think the rest is fine. - All right, so what you're telling me is after the ungodly number of hours that I've spent in the bucket, you're gonna then make me go downstairs and we're gonna go look after some creature that is potentially preying on humanoid flesh. - I don't think there's anything we can find downstairs. Jornir and I looked all over the place from the single spot we stood in.

We didn't look everywhere. We looked as far as we could. Do I need to go get my anchor? We don't have the eyes to see in the dark, but you do. Yeah, can you see in the dark? Who told you that? Given what I know of goblins, unless you're a different kind of goblin, are you a goblin at all? You look like one. I'm a goblin.

And Ken Goblins, are you not from deep in the earth? Are you not mortal enemies with dwarves? Yes! I know a lot of dwarves and they hate goblins! Fine!

So can you see in the dark or not? I can see in the dark. So do you want to go downstairs and see if you can find any of those bloodsuckers? No, but I have a feeling that it's far against one. Really? Mr. Sabascotch, I have provided you all of the courage that you need. Oh, that's what this was? No, it was a gesture of friendship, but now I have served two purposes, isn't that right?

Oh, go get me, Anchor. So bitch. And I draw my big fucking knife. And I would say that for any of you who can't see in the dark, like goblins, who are also the enemies of elves, that there are multiple ensconces all occurring. I mean, every surface of this ship has, and for many of you, the duty of

of going and refilling the oil to make sure that everything's good for the coming night has been among some of your responsibilities from time to time. As I'm wielding, much to Yorgrym's, Yornir's, sorry. I thought that might-- Much to Yornir's dismay. I will bury you. All right, where are we going?

Hey, lead the way, tell me where to go. Please do follow me. We should allow the mad worm to grab his anchor. I'll quickly grab that. I'll hustle on down. Let's go. And I will lead everyone down to the exact spot where we went down. Okay. This hole here. Now you gotta be careful because chupacabras are really fast and damn near invisible. Oh, actually, hold on. I don't need them there.

I lead them, I want to check somewhere else. I want to lead them to this side of the ship. You're in charge. And check these ways down into the-- Oh shit! So that we're on the total opposite side. Oh shit! You push into the room and on this side, both of the trap doors that would normally be sealed are open. And you have access to the build in that space. I'll ride the cruise down here. He fell on the other side of the ship.

But just, you need to be careful. All right, so just so I get this right, you fell on the other side, you went down there, you didn't see anything, now we're going to the other side. That is right. And you want me to go first? Given that you can see, yes, and you'll be right behind me. I'll be right behind you, I can see as well, Mr. Staviskotch. You'll have to crawl, because you're too big to go down there like that. All right, and I reach into my pocket, and I feel the coin that's there.

I give it a little squeeze. Feel it, it's as solid as it always is. And I let go with the big fucking knife in my right hand. I'll grab the stairs in my left hand and put my feet on the rails and kind of slide down very quickly, right? A very dexterous man. Without effort, you manage to find your feet at the bottom of the rail. And I'll lay on all of the ground and you look around for a perception check. I'm gonna put in one more bit of capsaicin herb

and take a poppy. And I'm just gonna keep the pipe in my mouth and I'm gonna heave the hammer, my anchor. - Swing. - And I will join down. I will definitely less gracefully. - Less gracefully, but you do follow. - I would, as we're going down, instead of grabbing a lantern, I will...

kind of like grab the flame from the lantern into the palm of my hand, if I can. Sexy. And as Barnabas goes to pack the... What are you using mechanically to do that? Prestidigitation, if I can. Yeah, yeah. Have you ever seen that trick where you like...

put out a candle, and then you light another flame and you hit the smoke trail and it just fucking sends back down. Oh, yeah. Have you ever seen that trick? No. That sounds cool. I don't know if I would be able to do it with the candle, but I just lit, which I meant to light when we started this voyage, but here we are. But yes, you're able to put your hand out and it

almost just travels to you, duplicating itself, and you're able to have a small, as bright as a lantern candle flame harmlessly hovering above your hand. Excellent. And then I'll hold it out and kind of in front of Barnabas in case he wants to light his pipe. Or if it's just already lit. This is not the first time. Thank you, Mr. Foyer Blossom. Appreciate it as always. Of course.

And you find yourselves now, all of you down in the bilge? I would follow, I'd probably be last. Yeah. You find yourselves in the bilge, and you made a 20 perception check. You look down. All you can hear are the waves crashing above you, strangely, against the side of the boat.

Where darkness would begin for someone without darkvision, you're able to see all the way towards the end. You can even see a small spot in the stairs, the ladder stairs on the other side, all the way down in black and white. No color, certainly, but you get information and there doesn't seem to be anything other than wood and open air, frigid air.

bitterly cold air in this village. I get one night off. I'm out here chasing shadows. There's something here. I don't... Mr. Yorni, you said... I don't see anything. And that's not to say that I can see everything, but I don't see anything. Neither do I. Should we move further into the... Oi, mister. Mr. Serbiscotch, maybe get behind me.

All right, all right, that's fine. I'll stand behind you and I'll be your eyes. I appreciate that. And I'm going to basically try to get in between Scrim and whatever dangers there might be as we approach. And I'd be right behind him, like peeking out behind him, trying to be his eyes. Which is hilarious because apparently Wizards errata'd Triton to actually have darkvision. Yeah!

Which is fucking... Yeah! I have it now. You have it now? I have it now. Oh, then you and I would be side by side. I might be hiding behind you. I have it now. But we would be together. Yeah. And I'd be hiding behind you and helping you look. I was about to make a joke about how I'm a triton. I'm able to see in the crushing blackness of the depths of the ocean. But this is really... Thank you, D&D Beyond. Apparently I have darkvision now. So thank you, Wizards of the Coast. Make a...

I guess investigation checks, uh, add advantage. Investigation? Okay. Oh, wow. That was bad balance. Natural 20 plus, uh, 21. Let's go. 21. You and Scrim walk forward very slowly, looking at every surface, making your way all the way across the length of this ship so you get to one end, and then turn around and...

There genuinely doesn't seem to be anything here. Except for a pool of blood. I would literally shout out to the rest of the group, "There's nothing here!" You hear the sound reverberate and echo from the other side of the ship. You might not be able to see it, but it's clearly Scrim's voice.

Yeah, I was afraid of that. We probably lit it up into the ship somewhere. So you think it escaped? We need to find it very quickly, as quickly as we can. I mean, all I can say is something sucked the blood up out of that floorboard, so there was something here. If it's not here, it's there. Are we sure somebody didn't just try and wipe it up?

Yeah, what if the guy who fell has just had a conniption fit and he's just flailing around and wiping blood everywhere? Well, because when we pulled him up out of the bottom part of the ship, it was a pool of blood. And when we came back, there were little

little sacraments. - It was so natural, not like any kind of beast. - What would have been a circle of blood just from the back of a head that immediately went unconscious and didn't move? Even you can see that it's like finger paint almost, like something is bathed in it or moved around in it and pulled up what material was there. - I trust you. I'm not saying you're wrong. I'm just, I had one night off, okay?

Just one. Let's check the hold. And I'm gonna go back up and start looking in the hold. Everyone else comes. I'll join you. I have a question. It might be stupid, but what if I cut my hand and we see if anything comes?

Well, I mean, the idea of being baited, I guess, is fine to some degree, but like... That's how we'd catch things out in the forest. But there's nothing here. I mean, do you want to walk through the whole boat with your hand bleeding? I mean, it might hurt a bit, but I'd do it. I just looked at your near, the surgeon. If you would like to try, it is worth the show.

You would know best if that's the way to track something. Well, if it's a blood-drinking thing, it may be attracted to the smell of blood, so I'm gonna pull out my dagger and I'm gonna slice my hand. Okay, 10 point of damage. All right. I'd take more. I'll roll a dagger attack on myself.

I think when you have a little bit of dexterity, you can attempt to control it. But do I? I'm just going. Yes, I do. I do. That's a Ranger. Attack yourself and see what happens.

I rolled an eight. Okay, you take eight points of damage. I'm unconscious. Yikes! Oh no! I'm doubled my HP, I'm dead. You take one point of damage, and sure enough, if you squeeze, you're able to produce droplets of your own rabid blood.

Rabbitfolk, what are we calling you? We decided rabbitfolk. Yeah, rabbitfolk. All right, so we wait here for maybe a minute or two and then we do this on every deck? Should we set up some kind of a trap or do we just think that it's fine to just leap out and attack us viciously? I think we lure it out and destroy it. There's no use in trapping her. Make a...

Make a deception check at disadvantage. Deception? Yeah. Ooh! Performance, your choice, between the two. Ah! Ooh! Ooh!

They're both the same, so 21. 21. Oh shit. I rolled a natural 19. Nice. Let's fucking go. Holy fuck. Welcome to the show, horrible spider monster. Ow! I keep squeezing my hand to get more blood and it hurts every time. Are you okay? Yep. We're still in the-- You're in the build or have you been moving up the hall? No, we're still in the build. We're still in the build and you-- We're going to wait a few minutes, see if anything happens.

You can hear the sound of blood patting against blood as it's starting to actually like cool now at your feet. You need everyone to make a group reception check. Oh my God. All right, Kimmy, don't let me down. Another 19.

Kimma, you literally can't. I got a 20. Kimma, I'm divorcing my wife. Marry me. 16. She's watching this. I love how the session starts with Kelsey, never divorce me. Tell Kelsey to divorce me. The divorce will be a resource step Monday. Where we started and where we've arrived. Okay, 24.

- 16, 24, 20. - Oh, you got a 10. - I got a 20. - She had the most. I had the second most. - 10, 10 and 10. - 10, 10, 10. - She's already married, Andy. - All of you shared the same experience. - Sound of waves, no perceptible change. - All right, all right, hear me out. So we went to the other side, the guy fell down, we couldn't get up, it was Lash, right?

We go up to what we came, we latch it, we put some big, heavy ass barrels. Barnabas, you're in there. We seal this shit up. There's no way anything gets in. There's no way anything gets out. We cross off the bill, just one of the layers. Is that reasonable? Yeah, I think that sounds great. I don't think there's anything down here. What happened?

Did he, what was his, I keep forgetting. Mr. Garside. Mr. Garside, I should write that down. Mr. Garside, did he tell you what it is at? Or did he say he was drunk? He was babbling like a drunkard. What if he's bewitched? We should check him first. Wait, wait, wait, you said something about witches and eggshells. I've been stealing all your eggshells. There are, if you do not rush,

Every eggshell, the smithereens and the wetch will use it as a ship to come and attack us. Okay, so, but here's the thing. Roland has followed probably every direction you've given him, and after that, it's like, how many goddamn conspiracies can we follow? Oh, it takes us one time of not doing your due diligence. I'm bleeding all over the place, so we should make a decision, because this is starting to hurt. We're not staying down here. We're sealing off the bottom, and we'll go from there.

I think that is a great suggestion. I will... There could be a witch on board! I will look into the weird and see what I can find. Exactly, Mr. Yornear. I will close my eyes deep and then I will open them and my left eye, I think? No, my right eye. My right eye, the one that's just pure white that I don't have vision in, will glow with this kind of icy blue magic and I will cast Detect Magic.

You'll cast Detect Magic. I will cast Detect Magic. Okay. How does Detect Magic work? What components does it use? For... Yeah, components. It's verbal and somatic, but I think because it's a racial ability, I don't even need that. For the duration, you sense the presence of magic within 30 feet of you. If you sense magic in this way, you can use your action to see a faint aura around any visible creature or object in the area that bears magic. And I learned the school of magic in any...

The spell can penetrate most barriers, but is blocked by one foot of stone, one inch of common metal, a thin sheet of lead, or three feet of wood or dirt in the last 10 minutes. Okay, in the last 10 minutes. You don't detect magic right away, but you do know that you have 10 minutes to be looking through this eye and be thinking about what possibilities there may be. So I will, I think we should...

through your plan, and I'd like to just take a quick look at that. Yeah, that's fine. As long as you big fellas will, you know, put some heavy stuff over the thing, we prevent Queenie from bleeding all over the ship. So I'm gonna go up the stairs to the hold level, and I'm gonna start kind of slowly walking through the hold and seeing that one of those barrels popped, strangely. I wanted to kind of look and see if there were any other barrels that seemed weird. Um,

and see if I can sense any magic walking just down this way. - You start to make your way, you can move your token. You don't get any magic until you get into the cabin area. But at this point that you look upwards and through the floor and you realize

that you're not close enough to the end of the cantrip for that actually to make any sense. So no, you're not distracted by any magic. You find nothing aside from the magical items that you may or may not have put into your cabins, but nothing yells out at your eye or you don't perceive anything like an illusion or anything along those lines.

- I would wait for them to lock those up, but I'll pull up. I don't see any magic on this level. - You finished locking the hatches to the build at this point and I guess moving some heavy objects. - Yeah, Bonobos. - A crate or two. - Put some heavy shit on top of this. We don't want anything getting in or out.

I'll drag some heavy crates. Okay, easy. I'm not gonna make you make a strength check this time. You're able to roll it over. Literally any cargo? Yeah. That would be like, you know. Look at the bounty of cargo that you have at hand. You're able to find a way to hold those doors down without issue, and you push the little anchor lock into it. Queenie, are you all right?

Can we keep going? Yeah, I might need to slice my hand again, because it's starting to coagulate. Please don't do that again. I mean, unless you want our surgeon to, you know, chop your fingers off. I would like to keep my fingers, but I'm okay with slicing another little slit there. I'm going to knock on the door of the one guy that's not us down here. Mylon. It's the frontmost door. You knock. Yep.

It opens, and you're staring at a human man, very grim, middle-aged. He is starting to have that sort of shade of gray, and he continues to look at you with this focus, this look. A big beard, also, I would say, with streaks of gray in it as well. He has always been a good hand. He clearly knows what he's doing around a ship, but he's never said a word to anyone. Have you...

- Heard anything weird tonight? Anything out of place? Would I know if that means yes or no? - He is making a clap sound. - Oh. - He literally claps his two hands together. He looks at you and he nods as if there was this popping sound that was unusual for a ship. - Where did it come from? Do you know the direction? - He leans out and you're on the hold level with the broken barrel. - Yeah.

gestures to the barrel. All right, thank you. Have a good night. I'm going to go back to the broken barrel and I'm going to look all over, see if I can see anything monster-y about it. Any kind of like

I don't know. You drank the spider water. Let's be realistic here. I tasted it. It tasted like water, but I want to see if I can get any sense about the barrel. At this point, the water is completely dispersed. I mean, I know that it's freezing bitterly cold, but it hasn't created an ice pool yet. It is very much just on the floorboards in that way. I don't like this. I mean, is it worth alerting the captain? We've got to tell somebody. We can't be in charge of this ourselves.

But if the captain brought this creature on board, I don't want to alert him. No, no, don't put these ideas in my head. We can't be on our own here. If he did bring a creature on board, I'm sure that he did not intend for it to be running around free. He might know how to track it, or if it's even harmful, it might passively feed on blood if it finds it.

Taishen, we were in prison not even that many months ago. All right, this guy showed up out of nowhere and basically bought us. I'm kind of with your ear now. I hate that he even said it, but he's right. We can't just go telling anybody about this. Next thing you know, it's, we're overboard. I think we need to see Mr. Grorside. There's something fishy about all this. He could be ensorcelled, bewitched. Oh my God. Got in on eggshell boats.

- Then one of you try to look for a barrel that looks similar to this one. See if there are any more down here that we can find. - No, we'll split up. I would like to try to remember the barrel that I loaded that had the clanking metal sound in it.

Do I remember where I loaded that? It's been months. - Yes, it's been months. And it's on the second floor. It's one of the many barrels that had the same red herring marking. Actually from the merchant, the one merchant company that brought all of these similar barrels.

They look nothing like the barrel that has popped open, but you do remember that particular barrel having that quality, even in your anger at the merchant for killing the albatross. - Well, we can split up. If you wanna check on the patient, that's fine. - Doug who? - I'll go with Barnabus, and we can look for--

That's right. We can look for some different barrels. Or the one that looks like this one. Yeah, I'll go with... I'm doing it again. God, your voice is going to trip me up every time. I'm just going to say I'm going to go with the hornier. No, it didn't. It sounded fine to me. They're very close. Coin flip, it's up to you. Or, you know, you can go man the wheel like you always do instead of going up in the bucket. Uh...

I will go help with the barrels. You can make tea, too. You know, he did get his toes chopped off all but two. Oh, now he wants to make tea. I think that you should give him some hot beverage if he is not bewitched. And he was a drunk, so it could sober him up a little bit. Maybe he'd be able to give us some information. I see it. See if I can get him into a right frame of mind. Takes being a drunk to get some tight-shent tea around here, I see.

Jornir won't admit it, but he's a little scared. You said you forgave me! Well, I'm still working on it.

So the two of you have to examine the barrels that you helped carry on the ship. Yeah, I would follow Barnabas to whatever barrels he wanted to inspect based on the information that he had. Okay. I'm just helping him out. You follow Barnabas. And you find yourselves in front of those barrels on the second, if you'll move your pieces. Oh yeah. It's all here, right? No. The actual barrels that I'm describing...

are on the second floor. Right here? And that's exactly where they are. Okay. So we'll be-- We're all very close to it. Oh yeah, we actually are very close. Yes. Oh, so yeah, you guys are basically just over there, like, we'll pass them and I'll-- Yeah, you guys are looking at old-- So I wanna take a look at the fella and see, hopefully in the last minutes of my Detect Magic, I'm gonna do a once-over of this deck. Much has changed.

As soon as you get to Corlys. What? You look at him, and the same flushed look of a drunkard that you remember on his face has transformed into even paler, almost ghost white look on his face. His eyes are still closed. He's still motionless in the hammock.

but he physically appears quite different than when you left him last. Oh, yikes. Make a medicine check and let me know how you were doing that.

Okay, that is a 10, and I'm doing that by immediately taking my knife, and I'm gonna cut, basically cut all of the, oh, I sewed them up, I'm trying to cut all the threads. You cut the threads, and you're able to open up this makeshift sleeping bag that you were able to-- Yeah, I'm gonna feel him, see if he feels warm, check his pulse, like, try to examine him.

He feels cold. He feels motionless. And it, with a 10, seems that he would be, has cast off his mortal coil. He's dead. Oh no. I know I should have stayed with him. Why can't this tea go to waste? Someone should have gotten naked. I knew it. How did he do it, Mr. Yornear? Aren't you the surgeon? Taking a look, I didn't.

This is not just the frostbite. And I'm gonna look around and see if I can see any kind of like puncture wounds. I'm gonna cut his, you know, cut his clothes off and... Make a perception check with a badge. Totally. 16. Totally. With a 16, you are able to find the only exposed bits of him, you know, his arms and everything were all in this makeshift sleeping bag, were his neck and his head. And sure enough, just behind the ear, you find a single puncture wound. Oh my god.

This is so bad. And the same lips that you remember from the bloodstain just around it, having pulled some sort of life force from for Mr. Darside. Um...

And all the sailors are up here, right? Like, sleeping? Yeah, they're looking around wearily. You guys are moving around, clomping and clomping. Like, you're getting a few confused looks. Some people are angrily turning. You know, it's a ship, so you expect people to be passing back and forth. Some don't wake at all. This man is dead. I say loudly, I need every other man to wake up. You see...

I think it's 12 people down here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You see 12 people all start to shift. Some immediately bolt upright and turn to stand. Others are slower to wake, but sure enough, with your reverberating voice and commanding presence, everybody is awake to find out what's happening. Someone's dead? Does anyone else, does anyone not get up?

I would say, yes, there's one person who doesn't get up at the very front of the heel of the ship. It's the tent of, the hammock of Roland Stonebridge.

Oy, Mr. Stonebridge, you heard the surgeon. On your feet, lad. I'll go over to him and I'm going to dump out the hammock. Yeah, he tumbles out. Okay, okay, okay. Fuck. Oh, God. What's going on? He starts to get up and dust himself off. What's happening? Mr. Yorney, you're here, is asking all the men what happened to Mr. Garside. He's dead. Mr. Garside is dead? Oy, lad.

More and more people are asking the same question. Many are coming up and attempting to wake Mr. Garfside, and immediately upon touching him, he feels very cool to the touch, he feels very cold. No progress, but they start to turn to all of you. How did this happen? Did he just pass away? Was it the drink? We might need to fucking tell the truth here at some point. Did you hear anything strange?

Did you see anything strange? Turning to the crowd now, they're shaking their head. Fenton is petting his cat with great concern. Most of them were topside, participating in drink and in music and revelry. You just get a lot of shaking heads now. Clean up the wound and we'll talk to the captain. Boy, Mr. Severus Scotch, help me with this barrel. Oh!

Maybe this will answer something? Oh, of course. And I don't know, how do you want me to help you with the barrel? I will probably heave it out and you have a knife to just, I don't want to smash it with my-- I can't pick it up is my point. Yeah, no, I'll lift it out. I'm basically for you to pry it open with your knife. Got it, understood. Yeah, Fenton runs forward as you're prying it open and before you roll, whoa, whoa, whoa, what are you doing with those barrels?

Does it look like I'm doing Mr. Sabascotch, please? I'm just gonna go for it. What's he gonna do? Go ahead and crack it open with a dexterity check. No, with the sleight of hand because you wanted to be quiet. Dexterity. Yeah, straight up dex as always. Yikes. I was due for a bad one. I was due for a bad one. I think it's gonna be a total of a seven.

With a seven, you push your tool down in order to get leverage on-- Just my knife. Yeah, your knife. You push your knife down in and it slips a little bit. Sentin again comes to you. Do you have any reason to suspect these barrels? They're not-- These are the captain's barrels. He specifically requested them. I'm basically ignoring him and just listening to Barnabas. I don't give a shit what he has to say. Make another attempt.

20. With a 20, you're able to easily finally free the lid, and it pops open. And on the surface of the barrel, you can see it seems to be quite full. You do in fact see a few red fish, but glinting between the cracks, you see a very familiar color, a golden shine in the

Well, well, well, I'm not sure if this has anything to do with anything, but Barnabas, you found something. Oi, smugglers. Is there any other explanation here? There is absolutely an explanation. I am happy to share that explanation. He puts Fiesta down. Look, look, look. And he realizes that he's standing in front of not just the five of you, but the entire crew.

Gold. There's gold in the barrels.

so that we can, we're not just going to shock for the purposes of buying this vial of medicine for the king and what have you, but there's tremendous amount of goods and stuff. We're gonna buy all kinds of shock souvenirs and magic items and anything we can find. We were led to this goal. We were led to this goal for the purposes of making a profit. Do I buy his bullshit? Make an insight check.

18. Even with an 18, because Fenton has such a picky demeanor, it's hard to tell if he's being Fenton or if he's being very nervous about it. You lean towards trusting him with an 18 and saying,

- Damn! - That makes some sense. But it's hard to tell. He's always flustered, even though he is in charge of the able man on this ship. He wants things to be a specific way. And being thrown a curve ball after having just been woken up, maybe he's telling the truth, maybe not.

I'm just saying that the captain wasn't gonna, this was his business, but it's just, it's just six, seven, eight barrels of gold for the purposes, so that everyone could benefit. It didn't seem like it was a need to know. Why store the gold under fish if it's for normal purposes? It's hard to move gold in the Wuzei.

I have no problem with smuggling and avoiding the tax man. I don't have any problem with that. What I do have a problem with is you not telling the crew of this shit. Well, even then, Barnabus, I don't think this really has anything to do with what we're currently dealing with. I don't know. What happened? I'll just kind of point my big fucking knife at Yorneir.

You will see that I'm like totally not even paying attention and my eyes are kind of glossed over as I'm like chanting a ritual to myself. So I... I'm just motioning over to you though and the dead man. Right. Ideally, right? I'll pull out my shadow and I'll just look into it and I'll say, oh, we need your help and your guidance, whatever. And I'll just then put it back.

The 17 or 18 of you, now all of you, the crew minus the captain and the five of you are standing in this hold area, staring over a barrel of fish and the dead body of Dr. Garcide. - I'm gonna hop up onto a barrel. All right, now everyone listen to me here. Mr. Garcide here died.

He was drunk, we all knew it. He fell down into the bottom portion of this ship and he got sick, but that's not what killed him. You can look at the back of his neck if you want. He's got a little sucker point there. Something was drinking his blood. There was something on this ship that could kill us. If you don't believe me, look for yourself. But we need to keep an eye out. If you see anything strange, you let Mr. Yornear know. He's the physician. He was working on him.

There's something on this ship and it don't seem right to keep it from you. Make a persuasion check. 18. 18. Well said. The crew looks at each other and for the duration, I mean, it's been weeks and weeks and weeks on this ship. You felt a bit of at an arm's distance, all of you.

- Purely click style. Just the crew having been longer on this ship with Captain Vermeer and you being newcomers, especially foreigners who aren't from Wuzay, it's been tough to make a connection, but you feel like you connect with them now. They start to stand to attention and start to look around in suspicion, beginning to assume the same demeanor that you are, that there's something seriously wrong here and it's up to them in addition to yourselves to get to the bottom of this.

Well said. I hope we have everyone's attention. What do we do? If you see anything strange, anything at all, do you let us know? Only if we work together can we figure this out. We think we've sealed off the build layer of the ship, but we're not sure beyond that. Okay. Where's the captain? Who's the last seen him? Uh...

Ellis walks up. We had a conversation. What's Ellis' last name? Mr. Coombs. Oh.

I remember when I was fucking Ellis. If you want... Pro tip for you fellow DMs in there. If you want someone to remember their name, be like, yeah, this is Purvis Titties over here. And you'll be all set. You'll be all set. Yes, mister...

Ellis. All right, we stayed up late and we were talking through some of the ship design choices that we were going to make for when we had that gold to spend. What do you need exactly? Where is the captain? I left him probably 10, 11. I can't say for certain. We were drinking a little.

- Left him where? - In the captain's quarters. - Oh. - I presume he's still up there. He may still be awake. - Wait, I mean, we have to at the very least let him know. We have to warn him, even if he's not on our side. - Yeah, I mean, and we kinda need to tell him we found his fish gold too. - Hey, Mr. Urinear. - He's doing some kind of weird chanty thing. He'll be all right. - I mean, the words just kinda bounce right off, but it's fine.

I'm doing stuff. Once ten minutes have passed, I would like to cast Speak With Animals. Okay. I would say that ten minutes definitely passed in the conversation that happened. So you can cast Speak With Animals. Ellis, with frustration, goes, Well, I'm up!

I guess I'll go upstairs and see the captain. And so he starts to make a way. Walk on your own. Oh yeah, well, you will have an escort here, Mr. Ellis, and I will... Come on, all of you. Where is your cart?

You just put him down. Fenton just put the cat down. So he's still-- The cat is making faces at Fenton's leg. I reach down, I'll grab the cat. Speak to me! Hello, cat. Can you understand me? A shocked hush hits all of the crew members as you pick up the cat, and it's like doing a little bit of this, but as soon as you say, with the magic of Speak With Animals, "Hello, cat,"

it understands you and somehow knows in its cat heart that it can speak to you. I have a name. What is your name? Fiesta. You know that. Does that cat think its name is Fiesta? My name is Thomas. He calls me Fiesta. I don't connect to him. Yes, they call me Fiesta. How may I help you?

Yeah.

Yeah, I have. Wind and wear. He turns to scrim. No, no, no, not him, not him. He's fine. I'm, like, not paying attention. I'm, like, picking my ears. At this point, you're bored of it. It's been hissing since day one. Yeah, I haven't paid any attention to Fiesta. And, yeah. That is it. That is the only thing out of place as a cat you have perceived this night. Yeah, I...

Give me a little sniff right now and you don't smell anything. Shake the cat. Shake the cat a little bit. Answer me, cat. Threaten him. Threaten the cat. Handle him, Jake. I will handle him. I can smell the fish downstairs, or in those barrels. I can smell the blood and the bilge. I think there might be a mouse.

I'll find that fucker. This is really bizarre. There's a mouse on the ship. I keep thinking I'm smelling one. Go, go, go towards the mouse.

I'm going to put the cat down. I'm going to follow this cat. I would go with Yornear. I would at least be like, I'm going to see where this goes. If you guys are going to the cat, then I'm going with Yornear. You start to follow a cat around the hold as it sniffs around the crate. Behavior that, if Yornear would care to notice, is something that it's probably been doing, like circling certain crates and stuff for...

potential vermin for weeks. As that happens, Mr. Ellis and Barnabas, you make your way upstairs. And me? And, my apologies, I didn't hear that. And Queenie, make your way all the way up to the captain's quarters, and you now find yourself at the door. I'm gonna bang on it. Captain, there's an emergency! A bit of a problem you should know. Oh no.

Captain Verney, it's Barnamo Stradway at your service. I, yes, is a cook. I would like to get an audience with you, sir. Mr. Coombe, do you have a key for this door if it be locked? I designed this ship, of course I've got a key. Can you let us in? He pulls out a ring of keys and after a few flips, he's able to find the right one and unlock the captain's quarters door.

Are you scared like you are, Nyr? You want me to go first, Barnabas? All right, I'll do it. And I open the door and I lock it. Push the door open and like all doors in every fantasy setting. Perfect. You make your way inside. There are a few candles on one table and I would ask you to put your figure, your minis,

your mini caps where you would normally be as you enter. I guess it's marching orders and you probably need... Captain Verney!

Barnaboos first, Queenie behind. Oh, I opened the door and went first. Oh, you did? Yeah. Okay, nevermind. JK's in? I walked between his legs. If you could just put that down next to the gang. You walk in and you see the sleazy-- Does Coom want to bang-- You should have seen the form of-- Or no. I thought, yeah, what were you doing with the cat? Captain Gourmet on the surface of the bed, under the covers. It's a double wide bed. It looks extremely luxurious.

I'll hop over there and I'll just shake him. Captain, Captain, we got something we gotta talk to you about. It is very important. I'm not gonna make you roll for it. When you start to shake him and he turns his head and his eyes are open, you start to have a very strange feeling that this is the same state that Mr. Garzai is in. Barnabas, you might wanna come look at this.

Captain, I will reach, I will just grab his face and start looking at him. I'll smack him. I was born at night, but I wasn't born this night. I think he's dead. Make a-- You're just like,

I'm holding him and... I'm trying to see what Yornir... I'm just trying to mimic what Yornir is doing, but I don't know really what he was doing. But I'm like... And I'll try to smack him away. How do you point it out that... Okay, yeah. And I will look to see if it's the same spot. Oh, that you can see evidently. He absolutely has been stung in the same place. And he... His eyes are open and he has the same coolness to the touch when it comes to his skin. His face is gaunt and seemingly...

I knew it was the chupacabra, I just knew it. We gotta tell everyone else. Boy, is there some sort of thing that we didn't do that drew a chupacabra here? I don't know. Maybe it was the fact that their merchant killed that seabird. Merchant killed? Boy, well, this is exactly right. You see, Elbitros' revenge is hanging from all of our necks now.

I think life and death roll dice for us, and I think death won. Well, for the captain, sure. Not for me, I hope. Oh, yes. One by one.

We'll be dropping dead. And I'm going to go, I'm just tearing apart the room. Barnabas, Barnabas, I'm going to need you to calm yourself. If you start talking like that in front of everyone, you're going to get them all in a tizzy, and next thing you know, they're going to be killing each other. Well, you just know that death rolled the six. Well, you know he did. Rolled the six on what? I don't know.

He ruled the six for all of our souls. And I'm gonna start tearing apart the room. I'm going to make my way towards the door and I'm going to shut it to muffle the sound of him destroying the door. And I'm gonna hop down to your door. You turn around and Ellis is no longer standing in the room with you. He has made his way down and is getting as close to the helm as possible where an alarm bell can be found. And moments later after you close the door,

the door as you are trashing and pushing over dressers, turning over desks, doing what you would do to see if you can find some additional clue or whatever it is that you happen to be seeing. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.

You're still following the cab. Yep. And I would say that it's-- Scrim is close behind. Five, six minutes have passed, and this cab doesn't seem to be any closer to finding any kind of a route. It's following a sentient, perhaps in its mind, you're starting to think as it's starting to check the same places over and over. Now, Yornir, I don't doubt you, and I certainly don't doubt the fates, but what the fuck are we doing?

I promise you this creature has a better nose and better senses than either one of us. Ah, yes. If anyone could find a mouse, it is this cat. Okay, okay, Yornir, whatever you say.

It's an extremely elusive mouse. It is a mouse, that is their goal. They choose to be hated. I'm sorry, I'm off my game. It's okay. It's been weeks. Take your time, but if you could find this mouse, it's critical, you could help everyone on board, including your friend. I'll try again. It's outrageous.

You think the cat's rolling bad. Do we hear the bell? At that point, I would say that at the six minute marker, you hear the bell and you know that only one of potentially four other people on this ship could be ringing it unless there's some sort of phantom.

Oh no, this can't be good. Come on here, come on. Taishen, we gotta go up. That must be them ringing the bell. I mean, I don't want to, you know, interrupt your cat following thing, but-- You two go make sure everything is fine. Oh, you're going to stay here with the-- Okay. Please don't be rolling all of this. I can sense-- I'm gone, I'm gone. I'm just like talking about--

I run to the upper deck. You run to the upper deck and you see Ellis. He's ringing that bell. Oh my god, Derek! Can we clip that? Can we get a GIF? Yes, we can! He's ringing the bell. It's up here. And as soon as he sees you, the captain! Captain's dead! I would look around to see if I see...

You two. I would have been rushing down, so I probably would have passed you. Yeah, you would have run into each other. You may have stopped if you heard the bell and turned around, whatever you would have... I still would have run down to tell you. Then I would be just looking to see if I see Barbas on the upper deck. You look up and the door is closed. Yeah, I don't see him. I don't see him. But I'm confused by the bell. I'm upset. But you hear Ellis's words. The captain is dead. The captain is dead.

I would stay on the upper deck. I know what to do. Okay. Queenie, what's going on? What's happening? Well, you see, the captain's dead. I don't know if you got that from the bell and the screaming. And then Barnabas went completely

completely crazy off his rocker started destroying the captain's cabin so i shut the door so people wouldn't see how disrespectful he was being lest they decide they want to throw him off the ship or something and then i was gonna go tell your near what was going on since he's the surgeon what how did the captain die oh you know same way chupacabra

You keep saying that word, and I don't know what that means. I guess I would move to the cabin's quarters. All right, well, see you later, bye! Thank you for the information! There's an exodus from the hold area. Most, if not all, of the crew members.

Roland, Fenton, Walker, Mylan, Stafford, Pell, Waverly, Knightley, not Corliss, Wade, Pendleton, and Kendrick all make themselves to the top side of this ship. Curious to learn more about what's happened to their captain on this fated voyage.

What are you doing? I'm still floating. You're so bitch. How is it possible that this fruit fly likes me so much? I've been-- He's been floating around. He just loves me so much, he's just doing that. I haven't tried to strike. The next time I see him, he's dead. At the 10 minute marker,

You continue to watch the cat and you can continue to follow him if you want. You no longer can communicate. But he does seem to be continuing to sniff around for something. If you find the mouse, don't kill him. Just try to trap him.

Do you understand? Knock him unconscious. That's a non-lethal hit. Exactly. So I will say that to him. So at this point, he would still understand me.

I just won't be able to understand it. Oh, is that a permanent? It's a fear ball. Oh, that's a fear ball. Wow! Okay, okay. So he's now, he says, "Meh." Like, he thinks he's having a conversation back and forth with you, and you're just like, "Yes, yes, okay, come on." Of course. And I'll join everybody else. Oh, you join everyone. So you're all topside at this point.

I'm still tearing through the captain's quarters. What are you looking for? So I am looking for anything that would, I'm looking for A, a creature, some kind of monster. Mm-hmm.

But if I don't find a monster, I'm looking for anything that's out of the ordinary that would explain what the fuck is going on. Okay. There's basically some horrible, like, you know, supernatural ice spider monster witch. The revenge of the albatross is upon us. And I'm fucking, I have no idea what's going on. So I'm looking for anything that looks out of the ordinary of any of the beasts. That's exactly right.

I'm looking for banana nut duck bread. I am looking for all-- Ava's cuckoo bananas. Yeah, I'm looking for anything that is different from a captain that I would have sailed under in my long storied life. Make a perception check. Okay, here we go.

Nope. I think it's a 12. You all right? Nope, hold on. Is that terrible? Oh, you gave me a 12. It's not bad. You're pushing things over, you're shifting around. It's when you are exhausted for a moment and you're alone in this room with the captain's body on the bed that you hear a sound and as you turn, you see a candle tip over and fall

extinguishing immediately, and something that almost sounds like glass against the window, which is open, disappears. There's the slightest, most faintest of moments where you think that there was something in this room that just left. I'll look to see if there's anything that I can see. Is my attention drawn there? You run to the window, make a perception check at advantage. Oh. Mm. Mm.

Okay. Come on. Okay, 21. Nice. You push your frame out of the frame of the window. Looking down, you can see the back end of the ship. You can see the tail, the wake of the ship. You can see up and around to the top of the poop deck where the balcony is. Nothing. There doesn't appear to be any form or shape. Jesus.

I'm gonna just close the window and then turn back and leave and look for my friends. You open the door and you stand where, and for a moment you see what a captain might experience walking out the door. You see a crowd of people all looking up at you expectantly. Barnabus, everybody else is below deck. I came up here as soon as I heard the bell. Are you all right?

I'm alright. Captain's not. He's dead. Some sort of spectre or monster, I think, slipped right past me. Went out the window. You think you heard something? I think I did. You didn't see it? I did not. Something slipped by me. This can't be happening. It went out the window. It could be up in the rigging. I just really didn't want to do any work. It could... I think... I think I know what it is. I finally figured it out.

How foolish was I to think that it was witches or spiders? That's ridiculous. I know what it is, Mr. Sabascotch. I lean closer in. You make your way down the stairs now and you're all crowded in. You're not the only one leaning in. Everyone is hanging on your every word at this stage. It's the ghost of the albatross. Wait, what? You mean the bird on the dock all those months ago? You punched that guy? Finally getting his revenge! Oh, you knew it?

Well, you knew it. It's flying around, sucking the blood from its bloodthirsty bill. All right, so let's for one second assume that you're right. How do we fix it? We pay amends. We say we're sorry. We kill the merchant. You punched him in the face real good. We need to throw pearls overboard.

Pearls! I mean, I don't have any pearls. Anybody in the crew have any pearls? A couple folks pop up. They have a pearl earring, my mother's necklace. The captain probably had pearls. We could go and filch those. Harnabos, you really think this is gonna help? Into the roiny deep it goes. You heard the cook. I'm just a top man.

make a... No, they're scared and convinced. The crew-- I'm also scared and convinced! The crew disperses the few who know where the pearls are, and sure enough, some of them come up, they have necklaces, a handful of earrings,

The one person who goes back up into the cabin's quarters comes back down with what is a large black pearl from one of the top old dressers that you've pushed over. They're all holding it and gathering it together and scooping it up. "What do we do next?" "Throw it overboard, lads. "Throw it overboard and ask for forgiveness. "To the soul of the dead sailor, "to the soul of the albatross,

They run to the back of the ship and free the pearls out into the night sky, into the air, into the bitter cold air. To you, my lover, woman in the shell, to you, the soul of the sailor, to you, the albatross. While this is happening, I'll see everybody around. I'm going to kind of

go on my own, leaving them, and go to the folk stall and open the door. Where are you headed? To the, that room over there. Oh yeah, yeah, the recreation room that none of us have been in. Yep. Absolutely. You find yourself in there. Everyone's at the back of the ship at this point, and you're all alone in a room

Not cold, but a cool room that is quiet in comparison. I'm gonna look around. I'm gonna see if anything seems out of place. I'm gonna see if anything feels bizarre or strange or any sign of a horrible blood-sucking creature. Okay. Start to make an investigation check. 17. 17.

This room is completely undisturbed. There doesn't appear to be any tracks or marks, smells, blood. It's been largely unaffected. It's left in the same, as you imagined, it's been left in the same condition that it was left in when people started to make their way to bed. Where's Queenie?

I went downstairs. What are you, I guess, what are you doing instead? Um... Oh, where did he go? I was going to meet Yorneir, but he ran straight past me and paid no attention to me when I was downstairs. So I just decided to hop around, and I imagine I spent a little bit of time around old drunk Jones. And then...

I think Queenie would have gone back to the room. To her room? Yeah. When you visited Old Drunk Jones, make a perception check. God, these dice are on fire. Perception 24. Wow. 24. Damn. Get some. One of his eyes, having been closed, has opened. Oh, come on.

What the fuck, man? Do you still make your way back to your room? Yeah, I think I would. And I would go to my little flower area. And even though they're just barely little tendrils, I would take one of them back and lay it on his chest. Oh.

- Okay. You're able to pull it free from the soil. Do you try to maintain the dirt ball? - No, no, it's almost as, like, I know it's not a full flower, but it's almost the way you would lay flowers on the grave of someone who's recently passed. - You lay down this small little sprig onto his chest. - I'm sorry that you were drinking so much and that you fell down those stairs and then a chupacabra got you. That really sucks.

And I don't know if you have family, but I'll remember you, so, you know, there's that, I guess. What's your AC? Fuck. Yes! 15. 15? Mm-hmm. All right.

In fact, they're where I rolled. Is it parasites? And so I'll look down at him and I'll reach up to close the one eye. That's really freaking me out, so I'm just going to close that there. Good night. Good night. Yeah, I'm sorry. It sucks, but rest in peace. You feel this...

surprising stinging sensation. Oh, fuck! Like a wasp. What the fuck was that? It's much more violent like that. Like someone put a nail against the back of your neck and hit it with a hammer. Bam. Yeah, I reach up and I smack it. You take four points of piercing damage. I do. And you make a constitution saving throw. Oh my god. Yes. A 21. Wow. A 21? Yeah. You feel a poison enter your system.

and you immediately start to get extremely dizzy. You feel your muscles tighten up. Oh, no. Uncontrollably. Oh, no, I'm getting lock rabbit syndrome. But you're able to...

fight against it, and still you feel that there's something else in the room. As you fight this paralysis, you know that there is still additional fights to come. I need you to roll for initiative. All right. Shit! 11. She's alone.

Well, I'm headed down there, if the book points out to you. I'm not! I don't know any better! We'll do a round, and then we'll make it there. I lived with a crew that didn't pass this theory. I'm telling you, that's so cruel. Because I was headed down, or at least, I don't know if I mentioned it or not, but I wanted to head down there once I found there was nothing interesting, so I was gonna head down one of those.

You would be doing that with your next action, I would say. As you turn to see what foe- What the fuck just poked me in the tashies, is that you? You turn and look up, look around, look up. There's nothing in front of you, and yet- What the ever-living heck? I feel woozy. That's going to be...

Shit on a shingle, that hurt. Good old SOS. That's gonna be an additional four points of slashing damage. Instead of a pierce, this strikes you across the neck and collarbone, cutting into you. All of a sudden, a huge gash appears. That's my best fur! How could this have impacted you when there doesn't seem to be anything in front of you? Completely invisible, whatever is instructing you.

I want to attempt to attack it back. Okay. So I'll be at disadvantage because it's invisible. That is correct. Not going to hit it.

with my dagger would be 11. - 11 is not enough. You swing out with your dagger after having drawn it as quickly as you can with one hand holding the blood near your neck. You hit nothing but air. - I'm going to use my bonus action for rabbit hop and I'm going to jump 10 feet away towards the dragon's head.

the stairwell without provoking an opportunity attack because I'm a bunny. That's outstanding. Extremely good for you. And then I'm going to make my full movement. That's so good! Run the fuck away. Let's put you where you're going. So she was here, right? Yeah. So there's the bunny hop. And I've got 30. She can go upstairs. There you go.

I couldn't go up those stairs. Oh, you're-- Oh, you're-- Oh, the deck. Oh, did you have-- She could basically disengage and go right up the stairs. You hop this way. Yeah, and then go up the stairs. Yeah, absolutely. One,

And that's where the whole crew is. Throwing pearls off the deck. We're here? Yeah. We would be over here. We would be right here. Everyone's just chucking pearls off of the deck. I can't see. So she would run up. Where does this lead to? That leads to the staircase at the middle portion. So then all she's got to do is come out the door, right? Yeah, those are not connected. No, no, but she comes out here.

Right? She could come out-- Because it's tiered, it's tiered. So she's got to come out somewhere up her deck. The face of this is this line. Yeah, okay. So this door is right here. So she could come out here. There's some--

There's some mother flipping chupacabras downstairs. You sprint like the dickens. You're covered in blood by the time you make it all the way up here, but you're so fast that you're able to hop all the way up to this. You see a crowd of people, shocked faces. They got me. They're at the tail end, aren't they? They got me, gal.

But they do turn as you make your voice. I need the rest of you to engage in initiative. Oh, sweet lord. Oh, and they're invisible, so there's that.

And mine's gonna like spin on my leg. Hot fire! These dice are hot fire. I got a 17. I love rabbit hop, it's the best. What a great ability, holy shit. That's a sick ass disengage. Yeah, but I only get two of them, so. What was your initiative roll? My initiative roll was, I believe, 11. It's literally hunter disengage. Right, right, right.

Alright, 20 to 25? 20. Oh, nice! Burn them both. 15 to 20? 17. 16. Tyshen? 9. That's what I get for trying to give that poor old drunk a feed-on. That'll teach ya! Fuck 'em, burn 'em alive! And let's see how this works. I guess we'll do some action music. Woo! Let's go! Okay.

We just finished your turn. We're going to go to the top of the round. Barnabus, you make your way down and you see the feet of-- He's Yornir. What? Wow, Yornir, my apologies. Oh me. Barnabus is first. You're first. That's fine. I do that all the time as a DM. I've never done that in the years and years that we've been playing D&D. Go ahead.

I'll look at Queenie and all of the pearls now off the ship and nothing happening. I'll have my anchor and I'll say, Queenie, where's the chupacabra? It's right back where it came from, Barnabas, but it's invisible, so good luck.

I'm gonna kill it! And I am going to, and I'm going to say, I call upon you, my lover, and I'm gonna get completely covered in seawater as I am drenched. There's gonna be kelp and barnacles that all start to grow all over me. As this strange deep sea power comes over me, I'm going to just rush in and just see where Queenie's going, and rather than...

then just swinging my anchor wildly, I'm just going to just look at the direction and pull a harpoon off of my back, it's in the netting, and just chuck it in the air, just down the stairs. Okay, move you where you would be. So he would be at the top of these stairs. Okay, put it there. And you're just gonna chuck it down at the bottom of the stairs. I'm just gonna chuck-- Make an attack roll at disadvantage. Yep, yep, yep, yep. Not very good.

- Not very good. Actions, that is going to be an 11. - No. - You throw the javelin and it barely misses Corlys' body as it wedges itself into the wooden floor. - And I am going to just stand at the top of the stairs in an attempt to,

- Actually, no, I don't want to block that. So I'm going to walk down the stairs and walk in here. - Okay. - And I'll look around for it. - Make a perception check. - That's going to be a 21. - Okay. You can hear something as you get to the bottom of the stairs. You can hear a crawling or slopping sound.

You're not sure if it's the ceiling or the floor, but it's definitely around here somewhere, whatever this spirit may be. Scrim, you're up. Having seen Queenie run up and she's bleeding-- Covered in blood. Yeah, she's upset. It makes me mad and I'm gripping the big knife

and my other fist clenches, and I see Barnabas run down the ladder. My left hand begins to almost glow with a deep, dark purple. As I chase him down the ladder, and I go down after Barnabas and try to see if there's anything that I can attack. Okay, move your piece where you would find yourself,

Probably right behind Barnabas. Okay, make a perception check. That's a pretty fucking good chemo. These dice are just like, I don't know what,

Eldritch God, you prayed to. You said perception? I got an 18. You can hear Barnabas is looking around. Well, you're the Juba Cobra. It's clear that he's perceiving the sound and not the sight, so not relying on your sight for a second, you kind of go eyes wide, but if you try to make an attack, it'll still be at disadvantage. You have no idea where this thing is. I hear it.

I hear something. You hear something. And in my frustration, from my left hand, a shadowy magic bursts as I cast Eldritch Blast in the direction that I think that it is. Okay, make an attack at disadvantage. Oof, natural one is my disadvantage, so seven. Seeing with Barnabas's eyes, even though you're trying to listen for it, you trust his sight,

and fire into the-- Shadow magic burst from my hand. Sawdust in all directions starts to rain down, but you don't hear anything. Goddammit! Bonobos, I'm sorry! It's my turn. You're in here. So I was already running down the stairs there. I said that you were already down there and could see, so you'd have to be in line of sight. Yeah, I'd say that, that's fine. So if I'm here,

Do I see them attacking, like flailing around and stuff down there? Yeah, absolutely. In fact, the Eldritch Blast especially illuminates the area for a brief moment of flare. I will. Let me just check my... All of this area is dimly but well lit by lantern light. I still have one spell left. I think I'm going to do it.

Let her rip, brother. This is verbal. I will run up here and I will say:

You better watch out! And I'm going to say a word in giant and a bright sort of light of like whites and silvers and greens and pinks and almost sort of like the Aurora Borealis will kind of like flash and fly and slither in a 20 foot circle here. I'm going to cast very fire. Let's go! Yes! Let's fucking go! It is a...

So you all have to make dex saves. That's fine. That'll be a natural one for Barnabas. Who's dex saving throw? I'm a plus. My dex save is... Did you get a natural one too? Well... I got a 17. You pass, you fail.

Seven. It fails. So now Barnabas and the creature that failed are now outlined in light. And... Say your name!

Attacking anyone that's outlined in light, the attacker has advantage. It's all right, Barnabas is-- And the affected creature can't benefit from being-- Barnaclebos. So any invisibility adds. Barnaclebos, exactly. It's on the ceiling, but--

What you see is an inscribable aberration. It's like a spider had a baby with an octopus that has its own stinger, like a wasp. It's flailing in all directions and clearly looking for some way out of this situation. You don't see what it is made of. You only see the outline of this creature. So as it turns in one arm direction,

turns around the other. It's like looking at a shadow of this shape, but it is able to somehow suction itself to the ceiling while also angry like a wasp or a bee with this nasty rear end that it clearly has hit Queenie with at least once. - Do these kill it?

I shut up. And, uh, yeah, it's my turn, I think. I'm happy with its new lot in life. It's suddenly... Yeah, I know. It's suddenly... Disimmolation. That was a lot of anger. Question, question. If you're Faerie Fire, would you be able to look at yourself and see that you're Faerie Fire? So... Yeah. Yes. So what it says, let me read it. In the attack roll against an affected creature or object has advantage if the attacker can see it and the affected creature or object can't benefit from being invisible.

So I don't know if that means that they can't be invisible or just means that it doesn't get the benefits of it. Basically, any creature affected, so those two, it would see that it's like surrounded in this kind of aurora borealis. Like, shit is awesome. How cool is this? Just me, this creature, is terrifying. Oh no. They're kind of like rune prince, but I got them because they have the rainbow in them. And see how they kind of retain the light afterwards? That's so badass.

So we would see it move, though. You would see it move. However, because you can see it, I would afford both of you opportunity attacks at disadvantage if you want to take cover. Oh, hell yeah. Scream is so amped, he's like, to the fucking graveyard, he's gonna fire off another fucking Eldritch Blast. Okay.

Because it's a cantrip, right? Well, so if you're a fairy fighter, you normally get advantage. So I don't know. So it's straight up a chenille attack. 100%. I mean, I... You need war caster in order to do that. Or do you have war caster? No. Can I take a regular? You can take your knife. Then I would just make a regular attack. Yeah. So just normal. Okay.

- That looks good. - I think it's plus six. - That looks good. - 16 is the burnable aid. - 22. - Both of you roll for damage. - Fuck yes. - As it runs, you suddenly look up and for whatever reason, it's like staring up at the Aurora Borealis. You've heard, maybe you've never seen the sky through this, but you've heard tales of the lights in the sky. And when you look up, it's almost like staring at that same starry sky. These moving, waving lights and you see this shadow.

this outline shadow, and it's as easy as hitting a drum at this point. - Seven totals. - Smack, smack. - Seven totals. - 13 points of bludgeoning damage as I swing my anchor and attempt to smash this thing. - Oh my gosh.

It's a little bit more octopussy. I guess it's not as octopussy. I don't think you can say that word on stream. It's a gene bond. It's an octopussy. I love Roger Moore. Yeah, Roger Moore is a great gene bond. There's this splattering sound and you can see it limp.

and it makes its way across the ceiling and then drops down through the open hole into the lower cargo hold area, and it disappears from view, at least the outline of it. But you both get a sense that you did a significant amount of damage to this terrifying creature. Tight. And that'll be its turn. Queenie, you're up. I am going to... Shit. I'm gonna basically...

I'm gonna move wise. I'm going to use my full action to dash and just run this way down behind Yorneir. Okay. And then I'm gonna tug on his cloak. Mr. Yorneir!

I don't feel so good. And that's my whole turn. What did you run down in order to get there? The stairs, the same ones that you're near took. Those stairs don't connect. They're here. They connect technically. So she could run in here, connect there, come out here. Or you could run down either way. But then I would have to run past them and I don't want to do that. And I want to be behind you. It works. You're able to do that. You still feel stiffness in your body as you're

pushing through and making these unbelievably hasty dash moves. That poison's working its way through the system, but you're able to fight it off. Is that the conclusion of your turn? Yeah. Okay, Shen, what do you got? Yeah, I mean, I guess I'll try to follow along. I don't have my bearings so much, though, but I don't know. So you can come in through here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Which comes out here. But you...

Comes here. Here. No, no, no. You got to go this way to get to these bad boys. There's no stairs here, right? You can make it here. No, no. So you were with us. So you can just come down here. So from here, you go 5, 10, 15, 16.

which goes into here. 20. Is that it? Oh, okay. 25. Yep, yep, yep. You're right, you're right. You can get down here. Yeah. Okay. You find yourself staring at Scrim and Barnabas. They are both heaving, breathless from clearly fighting something. Mr. Feuerblossom, the Chupacabra! It's getting away! Two, one.

I point wherever it went. You can see it. He's pointing into the hole. Oh, wait, wait, did you, so it's just right down here. Can she look down and maybe shoot it with a bow if? Oh, well, you dash. I use my full action. Oh, I mean, like, if we're up here. You can make a perception check. Shoot. I just figured, you know, so we can get, I don't know. Does it need to stay inside of a radius for very fire? No, once it's on it, as long as I maintain concentration. 24.

Does it repeat the saving throw? I don't know. 24. You can see that it's just starting to enter. It's just starting to enter this area through the open door that is the sleeping area you all know. Oh, it also sheds a dim light through 10 feet? Yep. Oh, wow. So it makes it really easy to see. So you know its location. Taishan, you have made it to the bottom of the stairs. Actually... You can see Barnabas and Scrim. You...

- Do you say, what do you say? - As a bonus action, I wanna use my honey pot and throw honey at it. - Oh, okay. - And so I essentially mark it with Hunter's Mark.

Oh. That's legit. So now I'll know where it is all the time. You have a natural sense of where this thing is now. Ranger style. You get two dollars. I think Gwydion needs to talk like that occasionally. You still have your action left. You still have abundance action left. And you still have free talking, free interaction with objects. What are you doing with your turn?

What's going on down here? What's the situation? - It's getting away, that way, Mr. Reliablism! - He'll turn, he'll see me, he's like, "Ditch, don't do it!" - I'll point to where it is. - He pointed to the open hole just past these massive barrels. - Okay.

I mean, I'm out of movement, so I would just be ready to go next turn. Okay. You have an action left. You can sprint if you'd like to. So with your action, you can take another full movement. Oh. Okay. You can try to run downstairs. You can try to run and jump in, however you want. Get it, Josh. You can go further down if you wanted. Yeah. I would, yeah, I would.

Continued pursuit. Let's say that you went on that side then, so like five, or like, see if you can go around-- Just be aware you're gonna be the only one down there with it. That's, you know, the train operator. But I can see it, Tashi! So yeah, you would be right next to it. We'd be able to do it, do it. Ah, you know what, all right. Okay, so Tyshen runs down next to it.

Oh, God! Ah, it's right here! You do see the same creature, and you're boggled by the shape of it. A small beak on one end is at the top, is at the bottom. It is on the floor now, and it is moving like if a dog had

If a dog had eight rubbery legs. Ew. We certainly don't have these in you, love. And that'll be the conclusion of your turn, Barnabas. You're up. I'm going to look at myself and I'm going to say, Rubbery, Alice!

In this time of year, in this time of day, in this part of the world, it's localized entirely within my person. So good. Fight for aim, Mr. Fireball. So I'm just going to run after him and try to...

I guess I only have 30 feet at this point. More than enough. So wait, so where, oh, I guess go down here. You just literally drop down here, right? You end up here. There might be some, you know, however Derek wants to. Difficult terrain. Difficult terrain. Yeah, to get through allies. I can still go right next to it. Do you want to go out this way? Okay. Yeah, and I'm going to just try to take my, am I able to reach it?

It's on the floor. Oh, I'm going to basically splat it like a fucking carnival. Make an attack and it's at advantage. At advantage. Yep. I'm gonna roll this two d's at once. I think that it's just an advantage. Yeah? Yeah. Get 'em. It's gonna be 17. That hits. Roll damage. That's gotta be enough.

Ooh, not great. Oh wait, do I get to reroll if I have a great-- or no, that's fighting style? That's-- Right, you do not reroll. Okay, I do not. So, seven plus four, so that's ten, eleven, and then-- Add rage damage. Plus two more. That's a lot. Eleven, 13 points of bludgeoning damage. Yeah, that's pretty good. And I try to just squash it like a fucking watermelon.

How do you want to do this? Ah, you bastard. You fucking prick. I'd like just to run up and I'm like, excuse me. I figured. Excuse me, sir, for your blossom. And I'm just going to just look at it and just try to turn it into a Borealis jelly. I love that. Across the deck. Love it.

As I'm-- there's a bit of madness to me as I'm covered in the sea water, as I'm dripping and I smell this deep brininess. I smell low tide a little bit. Ew! Are you swinging down or are you golf swinging?

I mean, I would be trying to pin it. So I would basically be just smashing it. Non-lethal. In the angle. No, I'm killing it. Extra lethal. The anchor hook comes down and it doesn't know exactly what to do. It saw Taishan was scurrying backwards and then it stops moving. All of its limbs go loose.

And you can tell that it is splattered. It doesn't leave any gore. It is somehow naturally invisible. And even though you can see the outline, when you...

pull the anchor out from the floor, all you see is that same shadowy outline of this strange creature on the moor about. I would have immediately, since it was my turn after anyways, been like, Barnabas, are you all right? And been headed down to see what's going on. It's dead! What, what, what, how? What is it? I don't know. I think Greenie said it was a chupacabra. I don't know what...

That's no albatross. That is no soul of any sailor lost at sea. That's something more disgusting than that. What a fucking nightmare. We'll run down. This is unnatural. Unfortunately, no kind of animal.

Does it look about the size of one of the water kegs that burst? - It looks like it would absolutely be able to fit if balled into the hog's head barrel that it had burst from. It must have been heavily pressurized if it did fit in there, but at the same time, given its like octopedal nature, it looks like it could slip through even a gap as wide as it could.

as thin as her fists if it needed to. Oh, wow. I don't like this campaign. This was highly in the barrel. Almost certainly. I don't feel very good. There's poison in my blood.

"Mr. Yornir, take care of Ms. Marge." I'll turn aside from them, looking at the thing. I'm going to look in your eyes. Are you feeling-- stick your tongue out, please. All my barnacles will just completely fall off of me and like . We'd be absolutely foolish to not assume that every barrel on this ship contains one of these monstrosities.

You can hear the sound of footsteps on the top deck above. And there are folks who are starting to make their way down to the hold where you were in. You expect in a minute you'll be joined by company, but right now it's just the five of you. And how long does... - The last 10 minutes. - Last 10 minutes. - I'm gonna maintain concentration so they can see. - You've got more than enough time to see this creature broken against the wooden floor.

We have to assume that there has to be more of them. This is not good at all. We don't know what we do. Our captain is dead. I might be dead soon. Mr. Urenier! Do I get a sense that she's in, like, mortal danger? Like, the poison's gonna kill her? I'm gonna make you make a lot of those, apparently. That's fine. I'm glad I'm proficient. Oh, yes. That's a good roll. That's a pretty good roll, and I believe that's a 19, actually. Oh, that's huge.

Oh, sorry, skills. That's a 19. 19. With a 19, you can see that same mark just behind the ear, this deep hole, as if a stinger had been inserted and then quickly removed. But you...

I don't get the feeling that she is... She's strong enough that she's been able to fight off whatever it is that would have caused the same issue that Corlys and Captain Vermeer underwent. I can't harness the Arctic anymore today, but I think you need to just rest.

I better rest. If I could put a numerical value on my life, I'd be at four and not a penny more. Let me get you in the bed. I am quite stiff. I'm going to take you to your room. And not in the good way. I'm going to take you to your room and I'm going to open the door. Can I have that big fur blanket you put on the dead guy? Yes, I will collect it. And I'll lay you down in your bed and I'll go grab the...

my large cloak and wrap you in the cloak. As long as you get some rest, I think you'll be fine in the morning. All right, I hope so. If I'm dead, though, you just leave me here. You won't die. Go on with that. I can promise that. I don't want to be a burden on my friends.

The rest of the crew suddenly joins you. You guys leapt into action and they're only just catching up. Fenton jumps to you. He's got Fiesta in his hands. What happened? What is that shape? What's going on? I'm gonna lean in towards Barnabas and say, I don't care who ranks where. I think you need to take charge here and I got your back.

Captain Vermeer being dead, I, uh... Wait, crew. This creature was stowed away on board in one of the barrels. It killed the captain. It killed Mr. Garside. We are very fortunate that we all made it out with our lives, seeing how it was entirely invisible, and once Mr. Yorneir's magic drops, we will no longer be able to see it. This is some sort of supernatural curse upon us.

that we got, no doubt, because the merchant that sent us on this voyage killed an albatross. And, well, as far as I'm concerned, I mean, if we're gonna follow somebody, it seems to be the person who knows what they're talking about. That's all I'm gonna say. I align myself with this guy, and I stand behind Barnabas.

as I look at the crew. And then I look at Fenton very disdainfully. Everyone looks around at each other and no one says a peep. Fenton doesn't seem to be cut out for full leadership quality, but after a moment, a pregnant moment, he steps forward. We, uh...

We've got a lot to do. We can get to the bottom of who brought this barrel on board. I don't remember it in the provisions list. We need to figure that out. It must have been...

Someone here? I climb up over Barnabus' back and over his shoulder, I say, "There might be more!" And then I duck back behind Barnabus. How do we know? How do we solve that problem? Sounds like maybe, and then I step back out, "Sounds like maybe we should follow Barnabus' lead." I am no captain, Mr. Stabiscotch. I never pretended to be. But what we need to do is make sure that every single one of these barrels that could fit a creature that size

His chest. Tonight. He lets the F stood down. Gotta do what we gotta do, right?

Is he scratching himself? No, he's rolling his sleeves up. Oh! Gallant! Oh my, he's ripping his skin off! I'm on the move! Kill the child. Destroy the child. No, he rolls his sleeves up and is preparing to get to work. You heard him. Uh...

Every hogshead, every barrel?

I think so, unless we are able to, if there's some sort of log, who's the quartermaster? We would know who the quartermaster is, right? Walker Clemens. Mr. Clemens! Sing him up! No, I mean question him. Now take it easy, Mr. Saviskos. There's a process to this. I just handle the maps. I'm not, I'm not, you don't need to be pointing fingers. Who's the bosun, Fenton? Oh, the bosun is Fenton.

Okay, Mr. Fenton, check your logs, check the cargo. The Manifest. Check the Manifest. Provisions list. Ah, ah! It's in the Captain's Quarters. And what I'll say is, for the purposes of brevity...

You guys spend the evening, the morning now, going through barrels, opening them. Whimpering in pain on death's door. Hmm? Whimpering in pain on death's door. Yes, you're hurting, right? Yeah.

Mm-hmm. You go and-- You could use a hit die after, presumably, if you could get a short rest after an hour. Yeah, you could get a short rest if you wanted it. If you're gonna go to sleep, though, you would enjoy a long rest. Oh, I am. Because it kind of pushes to some sort of a morning. What was it, my ears go down over my eyes and I just go straight to sleep? At some point, you would scoop up the remains of this creature. And what do you do with the remains, Nornir? I would assume that you'd be there because you'd watched the magic of your fairy fire fade.

Yeah, I would probably, yeah, I would definitely take the remains, and I would, what do I have, anything?

I would probably take it, I'm sure there are all kinds of containers and stuff. I would take it to the sickbay and put it in some kind of container with a lid that I could lock. So if there's some kind of latched lid, I would keep it in there. Yeah, I'd say that there's a latching locked lid container that you could put the creature in. It's a very strange sensation after the Paraphyton phase because you know you're holding onto something.

but you absolutely cannot see it. It doesn't even have an outline or something like that. It's like holding glass underwater, but squishy, animal skin glass. And you are able to slip it and it slops in. You can hear it.

It's in there, you can feel it. And then you tap it and it goes away. So I would lock it in there, but then help everybody with the barrels. The crew tears the ship apart, looking for more of these creatures. And by morning, you've all... You've had a long rest because you've actually gotten some rest and some folks actually stayed with you to make sure that you were safe and fine. And you're now...

standing on the top of the deck, watching the sun come up over the horizon. "Long night," Fenton says. I would have-- Oh, so I had a long rest.

- I would have spent time in the kitchen once, as the crew was going about, and I would have made everyone an extra helping, maybe the salted beef instead of the salted pork, which would be a lot more appetizing, and break out the she-turtle soup, and I'd make plum duff, or like plum pudding, and like make a special meal for everybody. And before I got some rest, I would leave a plate of it

for Queenie whenever she woke up. And then that would be what I'd do in them. So who says some night?

Some night, Fenton says. You're all enjoying the same meal now. Either top deck or in the back recreation area, wherever you would be happy to enjoy a sunrise and some fresh air. It's still bitterly cold. It's still freezing. And you're still on course. There was no time to unfurl the sails. Even though there was no helmsman at the time, you have been continuing to head south.

What are we going to do with Captain Vermeer's body and Mr. Yarsad? Who's the first mate? I have written down Mylon, but he hasn't been very first mate-y. String him up! We can say that it's Kendrick Yardley.

Did we find anything in the provisions log as far as who brought it on board? It's not. The hogshead barrel is not listed in the provisions log. It was clearly brought on by somebody in the crew. Bullshit. Just the one? Like, everything else lines up? You were able to line up everything. You pull everything open. There's no just, like, water-filled container that looks like, like, feeling around inside the water. I mean, you guys tore this place apart. It took you...

the better part of 12:00 a.m. to 8:00 a.m., tirelessly, with 17 other people. Or 13, uh, 12 other people. Damn. Well, I think we should, I want to give some respect for your customs for burial at sea. Queen never told us about the open eye, did she? No.

I can't wait to die. Oh no! I'll go, I can prepare the body. I'll go to the captain's quarters and, you know, see what I see. Make a medicine check. 18. 18. You see an eye open. It's not open, it's like...

fluttered and it's not it's unclear whether or not that would be because oh no no his eyes were open weren't they yeah his eyes were totally open they continue to stare at the ceiling he seems as clammy and cold and stiff dead like as four corals downstairs I'll kind of give him a once over I'll clean him

And, you know, I'll take a little bit of water, and I'll get some sort of cloth, and I'll just sort of rub him down. And I'll take his bedsheets or something clean and fresh, and I'll wrap him up, and I'll bring him out. Is Beru C appropriate for the culture? I'm sure it's what he would want. It's what we do. You know, I'm...

Sometimes we don't wait this long, to be completely honest. But it's... Better to do it a day now. He's fully dressed in his captain's uniform. It's an honorable burial. We'll have to be more vigilant about this sort of thing. There could still be creatures on board. I know we checked the whole thing, but this thing scares the shit out of me. I'll hand the body to one of us. I think you are the one that should do it. Well, I suppose...

And I'll, I should be able to... This is Captain Vermain that you have? Yeah, yeah. And I'll walk over to the, I'll probably take it to the captain's quarters and open the windows and stand towards the back and I'll just say, fair winds and following joids, wherever you may go, my captain.

And then I'll just drop her. As you were saying, as you were saying, fair winds and tides, you hear a voice behind you. Stop! It's the voice of Corlys Garthai. What? He's standing, having pulled himself up at the stairs. Stop! He's awake! We were awake! We were paralyzed!

Oh, fuck! Butterfingers! And I'll have the captain be looking in absolute horror. His eyes unmoving. His body stiff, his body cold. Seemingly unbreathing, undetectable. I will then go and turn five feet to my left and put him in his bed.

I'm gonna rush up to him. You are alive. You are dead. Could you perceive everything that happened? Yes. Yes, I've been awake ever since you put me down there. I was drunk and I didn't know what was happening. I felt like I was just getting the spins and then I couldn't move and I couldn't move and I couldn't move. My eyes were closed. I could hear all around me. I felt you.

Touch me. I heard the voice of everyone talking, everyone speaking about this creature, this beast. I knew what had happened to me. I only just shook it off. Captain, I don't know how long it was after me, but... Thank you. I was about to examine your brains to see what the effect was. I'm glad I did not. I almost drowned the captain. You couldn't have known.

I'm gonna have a little bit. No one caps an herb! The captain eventually wakes up. Let Mr. Firebrussel in, why don't you share? Well, he's talking to you and the crew all standing around now, wiping sweat off of his brow. His bald head now starting to get a little bit of its color back, even in this bitter cold. Well, that one's on me. That one's on me.

I brought the barrel on board. It was supposed to be a gift. A gift for a noble house in Chalk. They even said that they wouldn't see it coming. We were sabotaged. What you're saying is that this was a gift from one of the other races. From what you tell me, it exploded because the water inside of it expanded because of the cold.

It would have gotten out when they tried to open it as a gift when we got to shock. It was a complete coincidence. You know that there was a Chupacabra inside the barrel? It's not a, it's called a shadower, for one thing. I don't know about this Chupacabra business, but no, it's an elemental creature of sorts. It has a natural invisibility. It's non-magical. It must not have...

Yes, High Chani. I had a frog in my throat. This cheese is delicious. I had a chupacabra in my throat. They must not have expected us to go through the cold waters of Drakkar. They must have expected us to take a different path. They must have expected us to go through the Sea of Fog. That's right. So no one is dead.

No, thank goodness. And that had to have been the only one. Otherwise, there would have been more barrels. There would have been more creatures. They all would have broken. My understanding is if it kills something, then another one will emerge from it and so on and so forth. Thank God that you guys were able to act so quickly.

So I still have the remains, if that is fine. It will not spawn another one as long as it does not-- No, no, no, no, it feeds off of blood and then, I understand that it lays its seed and if the necrotic flesh is good enough for the seed to be birthed through another creature, it's all very unpleasant. So how do we know that you and the drunk are all right? Well, I guess we'll see.

10 days pass. The captain and Corlys are fine. And it's at this stage that you see the horizon of landmass emerge. That's where we'll hold a night session. Damn it, I'm tired. We made it. We made it. Thank you for DMing, Jaren. Thank you, Jaren. That was amazing. Yeah, seriously.

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