Teaching Weebs how to SHOWER | Trash Taste #151
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- Welcome back to another episode of Trash Taste. I'm Connor and once again, I'm joined by the boys, Joey and Connor. - We are the boys. - I had a stunning revelation this week. - Okay. - It sounds like an AI. - Okay. - What stunning revelation? - I learned how much water one shit takes.

- Okay. - Well, what do you mean? - Enlighten us. - Okay, so the other night when we went out for Sydney's birthday, I had to be back by 1:30 because- - A.M.? - Yeah, because they were shutting off all the power to my apartment to do maintenance for like three hours. So I was like, I wanna get back. I was like, I don't wanna walk up a bunch of stairs. I wanna get to the elevator. Also, I don't even know what the fucking stairs are in my apartment.

- They can do that? They can just shut off power in your apartment? - Well, they have to do maintenance, yeah. - They usually let you know like months in advance. - Yeah, I do months in advance, but it's like, this is what it is. And I was like, oh, whatever, no big deal. And so power goes out. Obviously I don't even notice 'cause I'm fast asleep. I get back by 1:30 and,

I order Uber Eats, the guy arrives. So that was good. That was like the kind of hype moment of that night. I was like, is he gonna arrive for 1:30? 'Cause I don't know, I'm not walking down those floors. - I'll make him walk up the floor. - No, no, I'd be like, bro, just eat it. You can have it. Honestly, it's 1:30 AM. I do not wanna get close. - He gets to the top of the stairs and like, can I have a bite? - Yeah, yeah, I'm like, bro, take some.

- I ordered some for you bro. - Check the bag. - Yeah. - It's got your name on it. So go to sleep, wake up and,

like at eight o'clock or something, I don't even know I had this. There's like a giant like tannoy speaker in my apartment, which the building has access to, which I didn't even know. I didn't know what this thing was. 'Cause I'd seen it on my ceiling. I didn't know what it was. Some announcement gets made at like 8:00 AM and I was like half asleep. So I was not paying attention. By the time I realized, oh my God, there's a loud fucking voice speaking in my apartment, which is weird. I was like, oh, that's odd. And then,

Eugene who was staying at my house at the time. I'm playing games with mouse and then he goes, Connor,

I'm like, what was that? He's like, "Something's wrong with your toilet." I was like, "What?" He's like, "Yeah, something's wrong with the toilet." I'm like, "Oh, okay." - I dropped a fat dumpy in it. - He's like, "Yeah, yeah." And so I'm like, "Oh, bear back guys 'cause mouse on stream." And I was like, "All right, what's wrong?" He's like, "Yeah, it's not flushing." So I go to it and I feel that like when I pull the toilet thing, there's no water in the tank. I flush it. I'm like, "Oh, that's weird." And I'm like, "Okay, well."

I guess let me have a think. So I'm going around my kitchen to get some water and I realized the water isn't coming on. I'm like, oh fuck, all the water's gone in the apartment. There's nothing. And then that's what I realized that was what the announcement was for. And so now I couldn't flush the toilet, but he'd taken a fucking poop in my goddamn toilet.

So now the only way I could flush the toilet was if I had enough water to put in the water tank and then flush it. Now I had run a bath the morning before and there's a giant bath of water and Eugene had took a bath and pulled the goddamn plug out. So my giant supply of water that I could have used for things is now gone because how the fuck am I supposed to flush this poop down the goddamn toilet?

But the problem was as well is that I also was needing a toilet as well. And I was like, oh my God, dude, I don't know what to do. I wanna hold it till the water comes back on. And I was like, I don't know when the water's gonna come back on. And now I started to realize how often I needed water because I was like, oh, I'll just go wash my, I can't wash my hands. - Yeah, you can't wash your hands. - I can't wash my hands, there's no water. - Yeah.

I had like maybe a liter or two of water in my fridge. And I could have done a few things with this, could have watered my plants, could have washed my hands, but I really wanted a coffee. And so I was like, Eugene, man,

- Sorry, dude. I'm making a coffee with the last water we have left. - I'm making a different kind of brown water actually. - I could flush the toilet. I could do some other things. I'm gonna make a coffee with this last water. I would come to regret this decision later on as I really needed a lot of water. But as the building,

had kind of like realized that, hey, people will need to go to the toilet still. They were offering free bottles of water to flush your toilet with. And I was like, great. So I picked up two, two liter bottles of water. - How long was this maintenance going on for? - It was like all day. - Fuck. - Yeah, it's usually all day. - It was like an emergency thing. It wasn't scheduled. The water wasn't supposed to go off.

- Oh, right, it's an electrical thing. - I wanted to shower and do stuff. And I don't know if you guys get this sometimes, but you're a night person. Morning shower people will probably understand the pain of not being able to morning shower 'cause you're like, I just don't feel like my day is starting yet. I just need to shower.

- I feel like I can't get any work done. I can't even start the day. I can't even, my brain doesn't function. - Sounds like a skill issue. - At least even just wash my face. I don't know why. I just need some water contact with my body. I was tempted to just go outside and start fucking spraying myself with Febreze to have some sensation of- - Jump in the river. - Yeah. But I was getting to the point where like I could not hold my shit any longer. And I was like, this is a dangerous game though, doubling up on the poop in the toilet, right?

But I was dying. And now a smart person would have told you, "Connor, just go to a conbini and shit." I was refusing to be intelligent at all. And I was like- - Well, because the elevator's out as well, right? - Yeah. - Yeah, so I was kind of like, all right.

I'll just take the poop. I'll just take this poop. I'm sure the water- - Do the deep think about it later. - I'm sure the water will come back on anytime now. So I take a poop, but unfortunately this was a fucking massive goddamn poop that I took. And now my toilet bowl was very much too full. So-

I was like, all right, we gotta try and flush this. So I got the two liter bottles of water. So four liters of water. I put it in the tank to, 'cause as you know, that thing fills up with water and that uses that to push and you know. So I poured four liters in.

I flushed the four liters, nothing. It didn't budge at all. I was like, holy fuck, how many liters of water do I need? - You know there's an easier method that uses less water, right? - What? - So I learned about this from like, you know, during like earthquakes or like typhoons and stuff like that where the water might just suddenly be cut off. What you do is a lot of toilets,

the thing that separates the bowl from the pipe is this little flap. And when you flush the toilet, the pressure from the water is the thing that opens the flap. So what you do is you, what you should have done, you should have grown those two things of water, filled it in with a bucket and then flush the bucket down the bowl all at once because then that's so much more water going into the bowl all at once that it opens the flap.

- I don't know. - I'm just saying this is like a normal thing. It's a Southeast Asia things. A lot of toilets don't have automatic flushes there. We use the bucket technique. I was like, I was like, what do you- - It works everywhere. - It's a universal concept. - When I heard you pouring the water into the toilet, I was like, in the inside, I was like, no Connor, no. - No, wait, not the place you poop. - Right. - Yeah, the tank itself, right? - The tank, yeah, the tank. - That's not how you- - No, no, no, no, no. You get a bucket and you just pour it in the place you poop and you just- - Oh, I did that too.

but it was too much. - How big was your shit? - It was two people's shit. And my one was at least a 1.5 size. Like it was a big one. And so now this is like what would have been maybe like even a tough flush on a normal day. I'd become just way too big of a flush. And now it was starting to smell pretty fucking bad in my apartment. It was just kind of like, oh my God. So I went down again and I got,

fucking eight fucking bottles of water, which is like, no, no, no, four bottles, sorry, so eight liters of water. - Yeah. - Right, right, right. - And I flushed it again and it didn't fucking work.

I think you just have a broken toilet. - I was like, no, this is too big. It was too big, but it did flush some of it. So then I had to go down again and get more. And then finally I managed to get it going. And I was like, holy fuck. I used like 10 liters of water to flush one shit. And now every time I go to the toilet and I flush, I'm like, that's a lot of water I just wasted. Like I feel bad. I'm like, I drink less water than I flush down the drain every day.

- Well, I mean like I'm used to not flushing every single time because in Australia, like we're in a drought like all the fucking time. So they actually teach kids being like, if it's yellow, let it mellow. If it's brown, flush it down. - That's it, Kyle, you know what I'm talking about, right? You don't? - Joey's like to the only other Australian, yeah, you know what I'm talking about. No, it's a meat thing. - Kyle, you're supposed to have my back.

- But that's how I was taught because it's like, you don't want to waste water because as you found out, use a shitload of water to flush the toilet. - It's literally a shitload. - I knew it was a lot of water, but I guess just visually having to pour that much water in to have one shit was like, oh my God. - Yeah. - Well, I don't think the problem is- - People must feel like when they find out like first world people, when they find out like poverty exists, like, oh my God.

- They live like this? - Damn bitch, you live like this? - Obviously, I was familiar with how plumbing works, but I guess- - I think the strat that you should have done is,

- You should have not taken the shit on top of the shit. - No, that was me being pretty gung-ho about it. I was like, it'll come back on any time. And it didn't come on until like 6:00 PM. So I was like, this fucking sucks. Yeah, it was out all day. So that was kind of shitty. - Okay, like what's the longest you've gone without a shower or a bath? Because- - One week.

- I'm sure it was a long period that I can't remember. - Right, right. Because like, I remember there'll be some points, right? Where, you know, the water was working, but in England we'd have a boiler and you know, for some reason the boilers are always prone. - I fucking hate boilers.

'Cause someone takes one fucking bath and it's like, all right, no one gets to have hot water. - Yeah, no one gets to have hot water. You can wait like two hours. - What a shit system. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. So sometimes the boiler just doesn't work. And you know, sometimes you have to wait a while to get like plumbing there. And the plumber there to like either replace the boiler or fix it or something. So you'd, you know, there would be like sometimes two, like a two week stint where I just would not have any hot water, right? Like,

- Are you okay showering cold shower? - If I have no choice, yes. - If I have no choice, yes. - Even if it's in England in the winter? - Maybe not. - Yeah, because like,

I remember that like the boiler would always obviously like break at always like the worst points. And I remember at one point I just got started getting used to it and I didn't take cold showers, but I did feel like I had brought like, let's say the second, third world country experience to England because what we'd have is we'd have like, we just bought like

extra like massive pots and pans. It would hit about like 6:00 PM. And my dad's like, "Does anyone wanna shower?" - Turn on the stove? - I'd be like, "I'm planning to be showering about now." And my dad like brings out like the, we had like four like stoves. So we bring out like four massive pots, start filling up with cold water and start like boiling our hot water for like the evening, which is what we do. - It's gotta be so,

- It's probably inefficient compared to a boiler. - Probably is very, very, very, very inefficient. - How do people live like that? - Oh no, man. - For me, with like a week, it wasn't so much like I didn't want to take a cold shower. It's just, we didn't have water to shower. 'Cause I was out in the middle of fucking nowhere camping for a week. So it's like the water is very scarce 'cause we're very far away from civilization. So it's like, we're gonna save all this water. - And it's Australia. - And it's Australia. So we're gonna use this water to drink.

And so I had no choice but to just not shower for a week. And then when I got home and I had that shower, I felt like I was born again. I was like, "Oh, all my sins were just getting washed away for not showering for a week." Never again though. - Yeah, isn't it like, was it Johnny Harris that made a video where he was like, didn't shower or didn't shampoo or didn't wash his hair? - Shampoo. - Okay, okay, okay.

- People with dreadlocks like first time. - 'Cause I didn't know if it was the science where it's like better to not shower or if it's better to not wash your hair. - Well, I think there's a few things, again, we could be all lying and chatting out of our ass, but I think they're like,

- I think showering or at least washing your body with soap every day is unnecessary. - Yeah, 'cause it gets rid of like the oils. - Yeah, you don't need to shampoo every day either. - No, I think shampoo they say you should maybe do like twice a week. - But even then I think it's like contentious. I can't remember. - Yeah, it depends on your skin like- - Yeah. - There's a sense of sensitivity. - I'm an oily boy. - All right, all right. Guy talk, guy talk, all right? How far do you boys go with grooming yourselves? Like in terms of like-

- Okay, okay. - In terms of where? - Okay, okay. Here's the, okay, okay. Question one, question one. Do you shave your chest hair? - I don't have chest hair. - I have like three little strands of hair that is just like, there's just like three little strands of my manly hood just being like, "Yeah, you're a big boy." - You're a man, you're a- - You're a big boy. - I don't. Isn't it weird though how hair grows on the body and like just completely different random assortments? Why can't we just grow like fur, like a monkey?

- What do you mean? - Like my legs are hairy, my arms are hairy and my chest's a little hairy, but like not much else. And it feels just kind of random when my body was like,

And it's like, at least the fucking monkeys were like, let's commit. - Yeah, all over. - Monkeys commit with having hair all over. - They were like, let's just get it all over. Like why do this mismatch bullshit? Like, I don't know. But what are the types of groom? - All right, armpit hair. Do you cut or shave those? - No. - I think someone told me that if you cut it,

you sweat less. So I tried that 'cause I feel like my armpits, especially in the summer here, just go to fucking faucets. But I find that it only helped slightly. - I think the problem I have, I think I remember cutting my armpit hair once in my life.

because I was like, okay, it's getting a bit long. It's kind of getting a little bit- - Cut it with your fucking scissors. - Yeah, just like trim it. - What the fuck? - Yeah. - What the fuck? - You don't use a shaver? - Just a fucking shaver. - No, I just fucking- - What the? - I wasn't- - You get a fucking barber to be like- - I wasn't, bro. - Let me stop this. - Bro, he's gonna have grayed two arms. - I wasn't even in the shower. I just like went to my room, got a pair of scissors and just went- - Bro, what the fuck?

- Do you not have like a body grooming thing? - Not when I was in high school. - Oh, okay. - I was in high school, so like I barely had any body hair that I needed to shave. I couldn't even grow a proper beard back then. So I was like, okay, you know, it's kind of getting long and annoying. So I was just like, maybe just go half, right? So that it's out of the way. Problem is, and this is the same problem when you shave your genital area, is that there's a point where it gets really fucking itchy.

And it gets so annoying. So like after a while, like the new hair is starting to grow and then this itchiness just comes and it's like your armpits are just constantly itchy. So you just turn into a fucking monkey. You're just doing this the whole day. - That's why I never shave like all the way. I don't go right to the skin. I always leave like a little bit. But I mean like I,

I've recently discovered the power of like shaving your armpits as well. And I've just realized how much easier it is to get deodorant to fucking stay. - Oh yeah. - Yeah. - Like I understand the effects of deodorant now. Like anime fans, anyone who goes to convention, maybe this is a fucking life hack. - They don't know what deodorant is. - 'Cause you know sometimes when I was like a teenager, I'm like my armpit hair was like

really, really long, no matter how much deodorant I would spray on there or no matter how much I would shower, for some reason, there would always be this like fucking lingering smell that I could never get rid of. - Yeah, because when your hair is long here, you're basically just putting deodorant on the hair. - Yeah, you're basically putting deodorant on the hair and the sweat just sticks to the hair as well. - I love when we talk about this shit 'cause someone always diagnoses us with something.

- That's a sign of ADHD. - Someone's always like, actually that's, this happened when I talked about the pimple on my ass as well. Like someone said what it was and I was like, actually that could be right. They were like, yeah, I don't know. - That means you've been taking too much of dick off the ass. - Exactly, exactly. No, I mean, I feel like guys don't talk

enough about self care and self grooming techniques. And I know just like, it was at least literally like three, four years ago where I had, when a group of guys in England and we just randomly brought up this topic and I was like, shit, this is literally the first time I've ever had this conversation in my life. - Okay, how? - Okay, go for it. - No, no, go, sorry. - Yeah, every guy has a different grooming technique. Every guy takes care of themselves differently. And sometimes just by talking about it, you realize, oh, I never shaved my armpit hair before because no one really,

- Does it not get itchy though? - Huh? - Does it not get itchy? - Not if, I do it with like an electric razor. - Right. - And I have- - Yeah, that's good. - Yeah, yeah. - I use an electric razor. - Yeah, like electric razor. And I have one specifically just for like my body. And it's just like a number one, number two. - I use everything. - Use everything? - All the same on my face. - Oh, bro. - Wait, so- - Okay, wait, wait, dude, you use the same one for your beard as the ones for your down under? - Yeah, yeah, I do, yeah, yeah.

- Well, 'cause I'm washing my body. It's fine, it's just hair. - Bro, no, no. - Not sure about that one, Chief. - Bro, what are you? Come on. It doesn't matter. - That's like if you got a razor and you just started going to town here and then you're like, "Well, my beard is getting a bit long." - Okay, hold on. It's not like that. I'm not like, "Boop, boop, boop, boop." - Start from the left side on both sides? - It's like one of the other gets done.

I never do it. I've always washed myself completely and then I always trim whatever it is. - Right. - It's just the principle. - I don't trim my balls that often.

- Yeah, I was gonna ask how often do you- - This should be like the perfect spot for a man. - Yeah, this would be the perfect spot. - So yeah, that was the question I was gonna ask. 'Cause I was gonna ask how often do you shave your like genital area? - Okay, so- - Is it TMI? I feel like it's TMI. - I don't think this is TMI. - I just vibe it out. I just feel it. Sometimes I'm like, fuck it.

- I don't have like a well monthly time to do it. - No, I don't have that, but like if you hash it out over a year, how often are you doing it? - Fuck knows, I don't know. - Probably like once a month, I reckon. As you can tell with my beard, my hair grows really quickly to the point, and I have like,

I have hair growing on like really annoying parts of my body as well. Like I had to start waxing feet hair, right? And it's not like my feet were like furry. They'd just be like- - Men got big feet. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. They'd just be like odd strands of hair like randomly on my feet that would just get caught up

whenever I put on shoes or whenever I just go about daily life and they would just get annoying. So one day I just got a fuck, got a like, Sydney has like a waxer. So I just like fucking just got it, like got a wax thing, just fucking wax all my hair off my feet. And I just, it's just nice now. It's just nice. - Elina always talks about laser hair removal. Whenever I say anything, she's like, you should laser hair removal. I think the male angel wants all body hair eliminated from the earth.

but she's very quick to recommend it. I've never had it. I don't know anyone who has. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Sounds like it hurts. - I think so. I've seen videos of it, of people getting it done. And like, I think the ones in Japan, they literally get it- - In Japan, it's very common for people to do it for their face. 'Cause in Japan, obviously clean shaven is like the look.

and some people who maybe grow stubble, they're just like, "Just get rid of it." I don't wanna have to fucking shave this all the time. - I think in Japan as well, a lot of guys get what's called a VIO. So it's like the V, the I, and then the O. - What? - Wait, wait, wait. - It did. - Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. - The V is like your, you know, where the hair would be like in the front. - Yeah. - It's shaped like a V. - Yeah. - The I is your ass crack. - Yeah. - And the O is your asshole.

- Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. - This is my first time ever. - What are they doing with this VIO? - So basically it's the areas that they're getting rid of the hair.

- Oh. - Yeah, so when you go get a lot of like hair removal, like laser removal stuff, they usually ask like, where do you want it done? And the most common one is a VIO. So it's just like getting rid of all the hair there because I guess the general consensus is no one really wants a hairy asshole. - That's true. - Yeah. - Which you know, I get. - I just feel weird.

- Just searching up ass hair clinic removal, booking in a slot, pulling my ass down. Someone just fires a fucking laser beam at my ass. I'm just like, God, what world am I in? - I've seen videos of it. It literally looks like a taser and it makes the sound of a taser. They press it up against the skin. - It's clicking a bunch. - It just goes like. - Isn't it like clicking a bunch? - Yeah, it's clicking a bunch.

- Apparently it hurts. - What is the deal with the hair on like the knuckles of your toe? Like what is the evolutional point of that? - That's the hair you wax off? - Yeah, I know, I have that. - That's so fucking annoying. - I don't know, I kinda like it. 'Cause if I touch it, my elbow feels weird.

- But also what is the fucking point of that? - I have no idea. - I'm looking at it, I'm like this, sure, sure it's there. But I'm like, what is the evolutional benefit of me having four fucking strands of hair on my like big toe? - Okay, here's the question. Do your hair have like a growth limit in terms of like your body? - I think so, yeah. - I think so, yeah. - I don't fucking trim it. - How long does it get? - On my toes? - Yeah, on your toes. - I don't like that. - Yeah, mine's about that.

And that doesn't bother you? Like that long and it doesn't bother you? - No, no, no, like that. As in like between these two distances. - Like about that. - Oh, like that? Oh, mine gets fucking long. Mine gets like that, which is why I had to start fucking waxing it because it just gets- - Yeah, like maybe a toe. - Yeah, it just gets like caught up in like so many different things. - I saw, I,

I feel like I always have to, like nose hair is super annoying for me. I swear I trim it.

literally one day later, it's back. I'm like, how the fuck does this happen? And so I'm like, I was walking in the train station and they had these little pop-up things where they were like 20 minutes, they wax your nose and you're gone. Literally in the train station. And I was like, man, maybe I should do that. - I've used those things that you see a lot in "Don Quixote", the wax thing. - Oh no. - You shove it in your nose and you let it harden and then you just.

- You see those fucking videos where people pull and then they pull the stick out, but the wax is still there. - Oh yeah. - I've done that before and it definitely got rid of it super fucking fast. - But also you need nose hair. That's the thing. - Yeah. - So it's also like- - It's like ear wax, right? - Like I want to get rid of it. I just don't want the shit dangling out of my nose. Like some kind of Frankenstein-esque character. - I feel like the nose trim has never worked good though.

- Yeah, you hear the sound of hair cutting. - I hear the crunching. - Yeah, yeah. - And then I pull out, I like, I pull it out and I'm like, man, there's like still like fucking two giant pieces, but I was doing like a full excavation. - I feel like nose hairs only work if you fucking tweeze it out. That's 'cause that's what I have to do when like mine gets too long. 'Cause like the trim is like you said, it never does the job I want it to. - Yeah, I tweeze it as well, but I swear it comes back in like two days.

I feel like I have some mutant strength nose hair that just immediately spawns. - You just have a spawn point in your nose. - I think I do. It's so goddamn annoying. - It's like you died, spawned right back in here. - Maybe I should just go and do one of those wax things, see how it is. But I've also feel like, man, I kind of like having the nice air filtration built into my body.

- That's what nose hairs are. They help like filter out shit. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. - So I'm like, man, I also would like to have- - Yeah, 'cause I definitely have the problem of whenever I trim my nose hairs, the next day I'm sneezing like fucking crazy. Just because the nose hairs are kind of tickling me. - But like, I know it's like, I know that you do a job, but when you clean out, you just never take like a fresher breath of air in your life.

- I think you're mistaking freshness for like capacity. - No, no, that's the thing. That's the thing. I'm like fucking Tanjiro. - I can smell things. - I'm like Tanjiro from "Demon Slayer." It's just like, oh. - I wish there was a method where I could do something extremely painful where I'll never ever see the nose hair, but it can still be there. - Laser removal. - No, no, no, no. It's gone.

- Oh, as in like limit the growth? - Just the hair that always wants to poke out. And I can just specifically tell those hairs to fuck off and never come back. But the rest I can keep. 'Cause I'm fine, I don't care about having those hair. I just don't want the ones that pop out 'cause it's like, oh, it looks fucking gross. - Yeah. - Have you guys ever- - People are gonna fucking enhance on this. - Yeah, yeah, they're gonna zoom in on our noses. - Have you guys ever gone clean shaven down there? - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I've never, okay. How'd you make it so it doesn't look

- It does. It always does. - Okay, here's the dilemma, right? - If you have like a Johnny Sins monster cock, then it looks great. But if you have a normal sized penis, it looks weird. - What always weirds me out is like my legs are like super hairy, right?

- So at which point do you like draw the line? - You gotta do like a fade out. - Yeah, you fade, fade. - You fade it out. - You gotta do a fade. - Okay. - So it's not just like, you know, it's not just like, oh, the lawn is completely mowed, but next door's is fucking like, you know, up to my eyes, right? - Exactly. - You gotta kind of like gradually fade it out so it looks more natural.

- It's just having like a patch in your lawn without any grass in it and the rest is just like fucking forested. - But that's what I mean, right? Is that like, yeah, sure, you know, getting a clean shaven, especially in the summer, it's like, oh my God, my balls can breathe, right? So it feels good, but like, it's never gonna not look weird. Like, you know, could you, like, that's like if a tree was growing in the middle of the street, you know, it looks a bit weird, right? It's like a little too flat. It's the same thing, right? So yeah, I think I've only ever done it maybe like once or twice, but other times.

Other than that, not often. - I've heard like the itchiness, 'cause I've never done it personally. - And it gets super itchy like three days later. - I've never done like the full clean. It's just like always, you know, just taking care of it a little bit of a trim here and there. But yeah, I couldn't get over just like the, how do I not make this look like my legs and my fucking balls are just completely different. - The penis is gross.

- It's a disgusting part of the boy. - It is. - Yeah, so it's never gonna not look weird. But then again, it's like, did you ever like have to, did you ever think to yourself like, oh, I maybe should trim because maybe I'm going to like an onsen or something? - This episode is sponsored by ExpressVPN. Going online without ExpressVPN is like not having a case on your phone.

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- No, 'cause I've seen the guys there, man. The Japanese guys definitely don't give a shit, man. They don't give a shit if it's hiding their entire fucking penis. - They got an Amazon in there. - Yeah, they got an Amazon.

- Sometimes you can't see that pee pee. - And I'm like, is it because the hair is long or because the pee pee is short? Or is it both? - Probably both. So, you know, I've never thought about that. Maybe if it was like an onset in a different country, maybe I'd be a bit more aware of it. - I'm sure there's an evolution need to have hair for some reason. - I'm sure there's a reason for it. Yeah. There's always a reason for everything. - Yeah. Do you think guys should wear makeup?

- Don't care? - Yeah, I think if you wanna wear- - Whatever the fuck you wanna do, man. - I mean, in Japan especially, there's been like a massive trend in the past couple of years of guys wearing like very light makeup. But like, you know, fucking people on TV have been wearing makeup for,

- Yeah. - Decades now, right? So it's like, it's no different. - I feel like if you care whether or not people wear makeup, it's like, what are you, what's so boring in your life that you have time to waste caring about this? - Yeah. - Yeah, no, I mean like I started wearing makeup like on and off every now and again. I've done, I've like been doing it less just because I haven't really had time in the mornings. But I remember, I guess like- - What kind of makeup? - Yeah. - Talking like lipstick or?

- No, no, no, no. Just like very light makeup. Most of it was just to fucking hide. - I'm a bag man. I got so many goddamn bags under my eyes. - Yeah, basically it's just like, 'cause I was born of like bad bags on my eyes. A lot of it's genetics. 'Cause like one of them, one of the, I think all three of us have bags under our eyes.

- Yeah. - Yeah, yeah. - 'Cause you can do, you can get rid of it, right? With like surgery or some shit. - I've looked at the effects and it always gets rid of the bags, but I have like bad coloring under my eye as well. And like throughout my entire life, I think we've talked about this briefly before where my entire life, it's a genetic thing where I just look like I have really dark under eyes and it does get better if I get more rested. But even if I'm like,

fully rested, have the best night's sleep in my life, I'm still gonna have some kind of like dark coloration on my eyes. - Why does that happen? - Sorry? - Why does that happen? - It's genetics. - But like why does getting less sleep just turn your face looking ugly? - I think it's because your eyes get sunken, right? - Is it? I have fucking no idea. - Something like that, I think. - Yeah, I'm not sure exactly what the reason, some of this is due of like, I guess the blood flow to your eye kind of like area as well.

- Yeah, so like for months I've basically looked up every kind of like, let's say cream or morning routine. - You can put like eye packs. - Yeah, literally I did like ice packs, I put cream on it and especially since I started showing, that was around the time where I started showing my face more and more often on camera. It was something I was trying to be a little bit more aware of.

And like, I've been used to this my entire life. I just go on the comments from my friends or families. Oh, you look like you need to get more sleep. You should get more sleep. And then, you know, extrapolate that to like every fucking video I'd be in on YouTube comment. And then one day I was like, Sydney,

- This can sound strange, but do you have any like recommendations of like how to like hide your eye bags for using makeup and shit? Because she also does have genetically like bad eye bags like me. - Yeah. - I feel sorry for our kid, man. - God fucking damn. - Your kids are gonna be like fucking down. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - It's almost up.

- Yeah, I mean like, so one day she was just like, "Oh, let's just try some very, very light makeup, just like high dry bags." And it was just like a fucking night and day kind of thing. I just started wearing it. And then for like a full on year, I just got no comments about my eye bags. And it's not like it really, really bothers me. It's just like, it was just a nice, not just having to like deal with those comments. - Yeah, for sure. - Having to explain for the millionth time, "No, I am getting enough sleep.

- Mom and dad, I am getting enough sleep. - I slept 12 hours last night, I'm good. - Sometimes on camera, you just look like you just got hit by a truck. - It's also sometimes just like, in the case of like a video, it's just like a lighting issue. Sometimes just like the bad lighting just like enhances the bags way more because of the shadow it creates. - Yeah, lighting is a big fucking thing. - Exactly.

So sometimes it just looks way worse on camera than it actually is. - Do you guys clean your ears as well often? 'Cause I know you're not meant to. - Never, never. - Because you went to the air cleaning clinic, right? - Dude, that was the worst experience of my life. - Did you feel good afterwards? - No, no, I didn't like it. I did not like it at all. I thought it was disgusting. - I actually do it like once every couple of weeks.

Just because like, I don't know why maybe it's genetics or whatever, but like my ears produce a fuck load of wax. And if it gets left, then it sometimes I've had just like straight up ear blockages before because of the wax buildup. So ever since I was a kid, like my mom used to like do that whole anime thing of like, I would like lie.

and she would clean it out for me. - I don't know, I go when I go shower, I just soap up, get around this area, get in there a little bit, but I never put my- - You don't go deep in. - No, no, I just do that kind of thing, right? I'm like, all right, that's enough. I wouldn't- - For most people, that's enough. - Yeah, I don't know. I don't put a fucking bidet inside my asshole and clean it. Why would I do it in my ears? You know what I mean?

Like, you know what I mean? Like I'm just doing the rim. - Just doing the rim. - Just clean the rim. - I don't wanna push it in there. - I don't know if it's because my mom also did the ear cleaning thing ever since I was a kid. - I feel it's an Asian thing for sure. - It must be an Asian thing. But like, 'cause I've heard from like a million different places that you shouldn't use cotton buds to like clean your ears. - That's what it says on the goddamn packaging. - Yeah, it's what it says on the goddamn packaging. And you know, doctors, ear doctors, health experts,

obviously know what they're talking about, but God fucking dammit, sometimes there is just an itch in there that I just can't clear out. - I think that itch is in your head though. - Okay. - I've never had this. - No, it actually is. It's literally in our head. - No, I refuse to believe there's an itch in there. I've never had this itch.

- You've never had the itch? - I've never had an itch in my ear. - I've had it. - I think it's all in your head, literally. - It probably is, it probably is a mental thing. - I think it's a mental thing. - If I don't clean my ear for about like four days or something. - That's definitely mental. - It comes and it's impossible to get rid of. I've tried other methods 'cause I've read some articles. - Have you done like the popping technique?

- I don't do that. What the fuck is the popping something? - Sometimes like if I really wanna like, you know, get rid of that itch and deep in my ear, but I can't be bothered to like, you know, grab the thing to like go in there. I just like kind of pop it like this every now and then. And it like, it kind of helps.

- It's probably just placebo. It's all in my head apparently. - I think this is all in your head. I don't think there's actually an itch in your ear. I think you're dreaming of it, but what is an itch? - No, I mean, what is an itch? Resource music. What is even an itch? - I'm itchy or am I? - Yeah, yeah. - Sometimes I try just,

- What doctors recommend is that you need ear wax, so you should just like rinse it out and just get a towel. - No, like rinse, you know, just like a- - Yeah, just clean it. Yo, that itch is there and I cannot get rid of it without- - Make me think about having an itch in there now. Now I'm feeling like there's gonna be an itch 'cause you keep talking about it.

- But did you ever have like problems with your ears when you were a kid? - No. - 'Cause I used to get ear infections all the time when I was a kid. - Oh really? - Yeah, I've had multiple ear infections in the past. So I think that's just like kind of fucked up the inside of my ears for the most part. - Yeah. - And also I have like very light tinnitus as well from going to too many concerts. So that probably doesn't help. - I've never really gotten sick ever. - Really? - Like an infection. - Ear infection isn't really like

- Ear infection is weird. 'Cause I've only had like one ear infection once in my life as a kid. And because like it's an ear infection, that's where your balance sensors are as well. And it was just so weird not being able to walk, you know? - It feels like you're dizzy all the time. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like you stand up and you're like, I don't know if I'm up

or down right now. And it was, I've never experienced anything like that in my life where I literally felt like standing up felt like I was hanging upside down. It's super, super fucking weird.

- But no, I got my ears checked when I was in Thailand because I was like, I don't know if watching all of these videos made me a bit paranoid because I'd heard if you'd like try cleaning it with cotton earbuds, like cotton buds that you like push the wax in. I was like, I wanna make sure I'm not doing that. And yeah, I got it checked and apparently like, I'm hoping this wasn't the itch, right? Because they looked at my ear.

And I don't know if... When you got your inner ears cleaned, right? That was obviously like... Did they...

- Did they take anything out of your ear or did they just check it? - A lot of stuff out. - I do not feel comfortable having an object that deeply into my ear. - He went so fucking deep in my ear. I mean, I like basically was on the, like the moment he took it, like the shit out of my ear, I just went to the toilet and I was like on the toilet, like vomiting. I was like, this shit's so gross. It was horrible. It was a horrible experience. I nearly fainted from it.

I was like, "Oh really?" - Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was really bad. I did not like it at all. - Yeah, there was like a single piece of hair, like a single strand of hair just stuck in my inner ear as they were like cleaning it out. And I would just never forget the feeling of just like, like the ear doctor was like, "Okay, whatever you do,

"Do not move." And I was like, "What are you gonna do?" And she was like, "I think I see a single strand of hair." And I was like, "Okay, cool." She's just gonna clean my ears, just a single strand of hair. She sticks like whatever she sticks in, I think it's like tweezers or something. And I'd never felt something enter, pierce my ears so deeply that I could hear like every little movement of the strand of hair.

And it's like everything is like base boosted. That's kind of what it feels like. - How did you stay still? How are you not laughing? - Honestly, it tickled a lot. It took everything it had in me just to sit still. But holy shit, it was so, oh, it felt so satisfying. - It's like getting a splinter out. - It is getting like a splinter. I don't know how long that was like standing there.

stuck in my ear. Maybe that's why my ears were like constantly- - See, but now the question is how the fuck did it get in there in the first place? - It could be like, it's a fucking hole in your body, man. It could be any reason. I remember when I was a kid,

One of my physics teacher came in one day and he was like, "Yeah, I just got a fucking moth vacuumed out my ear." I was like, "What?" - Oh fuck, I've had that as well actually. - Wait, are you serious? - Yeah, but it wasn't a moth, it was a mosquito. - Oh shit. - Yeah, like, oh shit. - Like it was a mosquito that like,

'Cause you know, Australian summer, fuckload of mosquitoes, especially if you're outside. And I remember, yeah, fuck, you just reminded me. So like I had this mosquito where like there was a mosquito buzzing around near my ear. And I think I must've like killed it close to my ear enough that the dead mosquito went into my ear. And I didn't feel it for the longest time. And then down the road, I was like, oh man, it feels like something's like blocked in my ear. So when I went to the doctor,

- Yeah, the doctor looked in and she's like, "Yeah, there's definitely fucking something in there." And she pulled out like a dead mosquito. And I was like, "Ah, that's probably what it was." - That's like that meme of you swallow 10 spiders in your sleep. - Yeah, right? - 10 spiders get in your ear.

- Yeah, that was traumatic. - Top 10 reasons why mosquitoes are fucking assholes. Why did they do that thing when you're like sleeping and they just like, it's always the ear. Like you can hear a mosquito just buzzing around and every soft it would just come right by your ear. - I don't think I've ever been bitten by a mosquito. - You've never been bitten by a mosquito? - I don't think so. - Maybe you're just not aware of it.

I've never seen like a bite on my body from anything. - You also rarely go to countries where mosquitoes- - That's true. Like we don't have them in the UK. - Yeah, mosquitoes don't exist. Go to the Inukahujan in the summer, you'll definitely get bitten. - Yeah, whenever we're out together, you're like, "I'm getting bitten by mosquitoes." - Yeah, it's 'cause I'm tanking it all for you. - Yeah, and I'm like, "Really? I never get bitten by anything, ever." - I've noticed even like, I don't know what it is, something about my blood, maybe it's like my blood type.

But like in Thailand- - He has a mosquito aggro skill. - Oh no, yeah. - Over here. - I have mosquito aggro. So like every time we go to Thailand, even if a mate like normally gets bitten by mosquitoes, as soon as we hang out together, they just never get bitten because I like tank all the mosquito bites for them. - Well, isn't it like some people as well, they get bit, but some people's skin doesn't react to being bit and other people's don't. - Yeah, same with bed bugs as well. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Some people get the red bumps, some people don't.

- Maybe I get bitten, I just don't get the bumps. - I used to get them really bad. - What, bed bugs? - No, no, no, mosquito bites. Like I had, maybe it's because of the mosquitoes in Australia are just OP, but like I used to have days where like, I don't even feel the bite. I might be like outside in my backyard, just like doing something during the night. And then the next morning I'm like, what the fuck is this giant red patch? - I wonder if they can tell my blood is shit.

- I don't know if that's why. - That's a good thing. - They land and they sniff and they're like, "Pfft, nah, this shit." - Yikes.

- Yeah, 'cause I must have like fucking sugar, sweet blood or something 'cause- - Maybe you got the right concoction of vitamins and- - Yeah, 'cause like I'd been told when I was a kid, oh, it's because like you live abroad. So that's why you get bitten a lot. And like the older I've grown up, the more I just realized, no, even if there's a foreigner next to me, it doesn't make a difference. I'm still the only one getting fucking bit. It doesn't matter how long I live in Thailand, I still get like the same amount of bites. - I think it's got to do with like a number of things. Like your blood type is one thing, but also like how high your blood sugar is and like just,

All that kind of stuff just thrown together. Because in Japan it's like, oh, if you have a Ogata, like O blood type, you're more likely to get bitten by mosquitoes. - I do think I actually have O blood.

- Weirdly, I don't know what my blood type is. I feel like I should know. - Do you know what your parents' blood type is? - No. - Wait, hold on. You literally have- - You've had your health checkup every six months Connor. - Does it say it on the paper? - Yes, it does. - Also, you have a blood condition. You should probably be the one person- - Wait, where does it say it on the paper? - Like at the top.

- Really? - Well, when they take the blood, they're not gonna be like, "Oh yeah, so we took your blood." We don't know what type it is though. - Wait, wait, wait, wait. I only saw like, I never saw a blood type on it. - Yeah, it has a, mine says O.

- Like just a letter O? - Yeah, it's either OAB or AB. - Oh, maybe I just didn't notice it 'cause it was under like all the other A's. - Maybe it was like, "Yo, I scored an A in blood, man. Fuck yeah." - Yeah, honestly, I pretty just, 'cause it's pretty Japanese. I just saw an A and I was like, "Oh, okay." - He's like, "Oh, that's good, right? I got good blood." - Oh, wait, is it blood type? Wait, no, 'cause you get tested on your blood as well, right? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - The quality of your blood. - Yeah, yeah. - So maybe I just thought, "I don't know, wait, hmm."

- I mean, if you're getting tested on the quality of your blood, they'll probably tell you what your type is as well. - You're saying that it's definitely there. - I'm 100% sure it's there. There's no reason for it to not be there. - Yeah, I guess I never looked up. I just never really noticed. I probably should notice, huh? - Yeah, I mean, considering you have a blood condition. - Yeah, true, but I mean, I get a...

I get like a factor injection, not blood injection normally. Like a factor VIII injection. It's not like- - What's that? - It's the stuff that I'm missing. I normally don't need a blood injection. I actually take to stop the blood from-

I can temporarily have something in my body that will act normal. So most of the time I don't need a blood transfusion or anything like that. I just need the missing component, which they can- - But wouldn't they need your blood type for that? - No, no, not for that. - Oh really? - No, 'cause it's in everyone's blood. It's just the thing I'm missing.

- Right. - So that's why I think I never had to learn it that much. - Hopefully, touch wood that you never- - You should probably know just in case. - Yeah, yeah, just in case. - Just in case. - Yeah, I had a medical bracelet at one point and I lost it. I just never got another one. I just hate bracelets too. I just think they're annoying. - Bracelets? But you wear watches. - Yeah, but it's different. - Is it? - A watch is nice. It's crazy. - What's a medical bracelet? - Just tells you-

Like, hey, where are my treasures hidden if I die? - It has the one piece like- - You've never seen a medical bracelet? - I've not seen anyone wear one. - It's like a white band, right? - It's like a, yeah, it can be white. It can be anything really. It's like engraved with information. - Right. - They normally check your- - Engraved. So it's actually like- - It could be like a metal thing and it could be like saying like, hey,

this is what he has. - He's a cunt. - Oh, you're a sick cunt. So it'd be like, hey, here's hemophilia, this type of hemophilia. So they'd know right away, they're like, oh, we gotta get some of this stuff. - Right. - So they'd have to like, you know, find out. - I guess, I don't know how fucking- - Probably needed in America. It has your like insurance on there as well, hopefully. - No, I don't know about that.

- I think it just says like general information that the doctors need in case they need to perform any kind of emergency thing on you. - Mine just said like what I had. Just so I guess it's much quicker for them to figure out what to do and to get the stuff they need. - Okay, okay. - So I did have that, but I lost it. - Yeah, you should probably get that. - Yeah, it's annoying to get one. It's kind of annoying. - Yeah, but it also, you know, your life's kind of dependent on it. - Right, right. - It's fine.

- It's like life insurance, kind of annoying to get. - I know there's other stuff you can get. Like some people have, there's other stuff. I know there's a technology and I can't remember what it was where basically it would just like, they could just, it would send everything to a phone. And then apparently, I can't remember this.

Can you Google this or something? There's some kind of technology they have where they can instantly see everything. - Wow. - And I can't remember what it was. - Like a digital medical bracelet? - Yeah, something that you could have. It might've been a card that like an NFC chip that taps and then it could tell. These poor fucking EMTs are like, "Would you get the new update for this app? I can't download this life-saving medical information." - It's like, "Sorry, my 4G's out, I can't download it."

- I don't know, I guess I'm kind of like, I'm kind of not the same, but like, I have asthma, right? Rarely ever comes up, but.

but I don't know if I kind of just wheeled it away or if it's a normal thing to- - It's all in your head. - If it's like a normal thing that happens as you grow older, but like I had asthma as a kid and it wasn't like horrible, horrible asthma. I would call it more like mild asthma at like the worst. But I would have to, there would be points as a kid where I would have to like,

whether I'd been exercising or a lot of the times it would just like randomly come about. I don't know what exactly caused it, but something caused it. I know this is like the wrong fucking mindset to have, right?

but I always saw it as a weakness, right? Which is the wrong fucking mindset to have. - That's a very like kid way of looking at it. - It is, it is. - It's a permanent debuff. - Yeah, yeah, because having, I don't know how to describe having asthma and just having that hit of an inhaler. - Yeah, I was so jealous of those kids. I thought that was sick when they got to do that. - It's like, "Yo, you doing drugs?" - They just go like, "Dude, that's badass, I wanna try." - It's like, "Yo, give me some of that."

But like, it's weird because like you take the hit and you go from like feeling like your chest is like congested and like you can hardly breathe to like having the clearest breath of like breath of air in your life. And I was just like, you know what? Every time I'm doing an asthma hit,

I'm admitting defeat. My lungs are stronger than this. I don't know why I thought this as a kid, but I would like, it would only be like to the limit where I would be like in pure discomfort. 'Cause sometimes I'd have like a mild kind of like asthma thing and I would just be like, no, my lungs are stronger. My lungs are built different. - I'll just breathe harder. - I'll just literally breathe harder. And it's like, I would wait to push it to the edge before like I could like barely breathe, which is,

- Fucking stupid. - That's dangerous. - I don't recommend that. I was a dumb kid who was just trying to like fucking will this asthma away. But like for some reason, when I like reached teenagehood, when I reached about like university age, I just noticed that like more and more, I just got like less asthma attacks and I don't know what caused it.

I don't know if it's just part of growing up or just like my stupidity played a factor in just my body reacting differently to certain situations. - Yeah, 'cause it's interesting 'cause like I didn't even know that like asthma was a thing like that. I thought it was always just like a permanent thing where like the moment you develop asthma, you have it for the rest of your life. I didn't know it was like a thing that just like went away or came back. - I still think I have like very, very, very mild asthma. I haven't had to use my- - But it's not as bad as when you were a kid, right?

- Oh no, no way, no way. Like before I would, there would like, I could not travel without my inhaler just in case, but I haven't needed to use mine. Like I still have my inhaler in like every travel pack that I have with me whenever I go travel, but I haven't had to use it in,

I think it's coming on to like a decade, but I haven't had to like use my inhaler. So it's been a long time since I've had like a proper bad asthma attack. And I don't know what factors played into that, but I just looked back and I was just like, why was I so adamant on using the fucking inhaler? - Yeah, I guess it's kind of the same thing as like allergies, right?

'Cause like allergies are also the same. Because like, you know, I had fucking horrible hay fever in Australia and I always like saw it as defeat if I like had to pull the tissues out in the middle of a conversation to like blow my nose. I'm like, no, I'll just fucking breathe harder. I'll just fucking do one of those and I'm like, yeah, I'm good. - I don't need that. - But then I realized much later on that like doing the like the hard disgusting like liquidy sniff is way,

- More uncool than just getting a tissue and just blowing that shit out. But yeah, I don't know. I totally get that whole like, it's a weakness thing, even though it's not like fucking everyone. So many people have asthma, so many people have hay fever. It's like nothing to be ashamed of, but like, yeah, I don't know what it is. It's like something about you being a kid, just being like, no.

I'm not like the rest of them. - I refuse. - I refuse. - I am a strong boy. - I'm gonna get through this, okay? Body, fucking listen to me. You can fight through this. You can just breathe. - Start being weak.

- We are the worst medical advisors. - Oh my God, yeah. - Hopefully, yeah, definitely don't listen to us to medical advice at all. We have someone with a blood condition who does not know their blood type. And an asthmatic who refuses to use his inhaler.

- Just give me the universal blood, I'll be all right. - The universal blood? - The universal blood. - What's the one, oh, negative is that one that works with everything? Or is it AB? - One of them.

- I don't know, you should be the one. - Hey, it's the doctor's job. - Give me the universal one, the C7. - Give me the best you got, doc. - Give me a top shelf. - Are you cooking or what? - So changing topics, I went to Hakone again yesterday. It's been a while since I've been to Hakone.

And for the first time, I actually like, I guess explored some of the more like, let's say touristy areas of Hakone. - Did you go on the pirate ship? - I did not go. I'd heard about this pirate ship. No, we went up to the mountain and like, it just reminded me how far I could go

like Japanese, like how far Japanese areas will push this one little thing as like a selling point for like tourism. - Are you talking about the black eggs? - I am talking about the black egg, man. - Those black eggs are a scam. - They are a scam. - It's a fuck, okay. So like we got a Hakenai, me and Sydney. So we're taking like our friend Eugene

And me and Cidi are very much just, "Yo, we just wanna go and just chill out and just go to the onsen and chill out." And Eugene's like, "No, I wanna explore. I've heard this thing called this like black egg that gives you like good health and you have to travel up this fucking mountain to get there." - Sounds like the shittiest side quest ever. - It is the shittiest side quest ever. So we go up there and we're like,

And it takes like fucking, took us like 45 minutes to get up this mountain with all like the, 'cause Hakone, even though it's like a touristy area, if you don't have a car, it's still, it's pretty hard to get around. 'Cause there are no, there's like limited taxis in the area. It's a very kind of hilly area. So what most people, what most tourists do is they hire, they go to their, they go to their onsen

and then they just stay, right? And then they just stay in the onsen for their entire duration and just relax. So actually like getting around to different spots is pretty hard. So to get up to this mountain,

to where like, I guess there are kind of like geothermal activity. - It's the sulfur lakes. - Yeah, it's like sulfur lakes and stuff like that, which is fine, I don't know. - If you ever wanted to go to a mountain that smells like farts perpetually, that's the place to go. - It's literally like going there, you're like, oh, I'm smelling Satan's ass right now.

this is what Satan's ass smells like. And I'm like, cool, let's try this black egg that Eugene has excitedly been talking about for the past 45 fucking minutes 'cause I just wanna go back to this onsen. And so we go there and we thought, I thought it would just be like one small shack or something that's up there. No, they have like this entire complex with just,

It's like a two story massive shopping center based around this black fucking egg. I'm like, what the fuck? It's a black egg. - That place is the epitome of milking the cow dry. - They had an entire fucking

- Like, what are you, why is this here? - And in all honesty, like when you actually find out about how they make the black eggs, it's really not that impressive. All they do is they get an egg and they throw it into a boiling sulfur pond for like three minutes and then that's, and then some chemical reaction turns the shell black. When you crack open the egg though, it just looks like an egg. - Oh, yeah, it looks kind of like

because you see the egg and it's like warm and it's black, but I'm like, you could have just put this in fucking food coloring. I wouldn't be able to tell the difference. - And also the egg kind of smells like farts because of the sulfur. - And the egg kind of smells like farts. So yeah, you crack it open and it's just a normal boiled egg. I remember eating it and Eugene's like, "I can really like taste the sulfur." I took a bite and I'm like, this is like every other boiled egg.

- It is a hard boiled egg. I'm like, bro, this needs some salt in it, man. - Like you literally paid like what you, the amount you'd pay for like a full pack of 12 eggs for one black egg. - And I'm like the line to just get these eggs was like, it was the entire like length of the shop. I'm like.

I'm like the Japanese are a fucking master at marketing the stupidest fucking thing that people will travel to your prefecture to do. - The one thing though, that's cool up there. I don't know if they still have it, but they have like an ice cream place, like a soft serve place that does black soft serves. But it's all it is. It looks cool. Cause it's like, it's this pitch black ice cream. - Yeah, yeah, I saw that. - It's just vanilla ice cream.

- Yeah, they normally put charcoal in it. - Yeah, they put charcoal in it. - Yeah, and that makes it pretty. - But when you eat it, it's just a vanilla. - Charcoal vanilla is actually pretty good there. - Huh? - Charcoal vanilla is pretty good there. - Charcoal vanilla is good, but is it worth spending 45 minutes to go up a mountain that smells like fast to get it? Not sure. - You ever do that shit where you put like charcoal on your teeth?

- Yes, I've done that. - I've done that. - Yeah, I used to use like a charcoal face wash. - Yeah. - Yeah, I don't know. I feel like it doesn't work. - It got rid of my acne. - Oh, okay. - Yeah. - So it works for me. - Part of the problem with a lot of these like, let's say like self grooming, self like beauty tips and stuff like that is I don't know who to fucking trust. 'Cause let's be honest.

like basically all of these products are made in a lab, right? - Yeah. - With some chemicals that you'd hope help whatever the fuck they're selling. But like every time I like go on YouTube or go on the internet to like search up, how do I get rid of, let's say I have like a bad acne day or something. What's the best way to like get rid of that? - Yeah, a lot of the time it's like,

- A lot of the time, a lot of stuff like that will be like, "Hey, maybe you should sleep more, exercise and eat healthy." And then like, "No, no, no, no, I didn't come for that answer. I don't want that answer." - Like just stand in the sunlight for a little bit and go away. - Well, I started wearing a...

I was using face masks for a while and I kind of like it, but it's also kind of annoying. So you have to leave them on for like 15 minutes. Sometimes I just want to get into streaming right away. And then I know that a lot of people said wear sunscreen every day. So I started doing that and I don't know if it is going to do anything. - What is the science of that?

- Well, so obviously like even when it's like cloudy and stuff, there's UV and the UV is pretty bad for your skin in general. So the idea is that if you just always wearing, it's a moisturizing cream and sunscreen. - Yeah. - So hopefully the idea is I get moisturized and also protect from UVs. - Bro's getting sunburned in his house man. - Even if I'm walking outside for like an hour, I'm like, I'm putting it on. - That's why you don't use light mode. You're like, ah, my skin.

- I think UV is what like kind of ages your skin. Like it can speed it up. - Oh yeah, tremendously. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- When I was hanging out with Ludwig, he was like, it was like a cloudy day and he was like, "Oh, check the UVs." I'm like, "What?" He's like, "Yeah, go check the UVs outside." I'm like, "Why?" He's like, "Go to see if I could put sunscreen on." - You know those like strips, those like black strips that you see like on your nose that like gets rid of like blackheads? - Oh, blackheads, yeah. - Do you know, have you ever used them? - Yeah, I've used it. - Have you ever seen it be as effective as what those YouTube videos make it seem like? - I feel like it works, but...

not well enough to let me wanna keep doing it. - Yeah, like I've seen videos, especially the videos where, you know, they advertise it, of course, of course, of course it's gonna be the videos they advertise it. And it looks so fucking satisfying just seeing like the little pins like pop out as you peel it. - So what is this used for? - Getting rid of blackheads. - Blackheads on your nose. - Like on your nose and on your forehead and stuff like that. But every time I've seen someone do it, I swear to God, it just rips out their hair.

- I don't know, I never see any fucking blackheads on there. - They're just waxing their face. - I'm pretty sure I did, I saw blackheads, but like I found that the results were so subpar that I was like, I don't even know I had these. Like I couldn't even tell. The reason I did it is 'cause they marketed towards me and made me think that I had a problem. So I did it and I was like, I mean, I guess there's something on it, but I'm like,

I don't really see a difference. I feel a difference, but that's just because I peeled my skin. So I'll feel different no matter what when I do that. I don't know. Maybe I'm being- - Have you ever fallen down the YouTube rabbit hole of like those fucking pimple popping videos? - No. - Bro, I can't watch those. I cannot watch those. I don't understand. I'm calling out people who enjoy watching videos like that. - I bet Maylin likes them. - Yeah, I bet Maylin likes them. - Is Maylin here?

- No she's not. - Oh, she's left. - Okay, so no offense for people who love watching videos like that. What the fuck is wrong with you? It's so gross. I don't understand. Like people say like, oh, it's satisfying. And I'm like, slime videos are satisfying. Just watch those. - No, I do get it. 'Cause when you pop, when I pop my own pimple or something, it is kind of satisfying. - Really? - What, when you pop your own pimple and you get all that shit out of it? - It just hurts.

- No, it doesn't hurt. - It does. - No. - I used to have mad acne on my face when I was in high school. And so like I would sometimes accidentally pop pimples just by like scrunching my face. - Whoa. - What? - Dude, I had really bad acne.

- No, dude, 'cause when you get a bunch out, you're like, "Ah, fucking nice to get it all out." - Yeah, but then it just leaves a fucking scar on your face. - Yeah, not for long though. - Oh, sometimes it's permanent. - Oh, really? - Yeah. - Yeah, that's why you shouldn't pop your pimple. - I actually have some permanent scars on my face because of it. - I can't tell. - I have the beard to hide it.

- But it's super fucking hard to not pop it because it's just so satisfying. - Dermatologists always say like don't pop your pimples. - You shouldn't pop your pimples. - Oh, you're not supposed to? - No. - You're not supposed to. - 'Cause it leaves a mark. - 'Cause sometimes you can actually like push it like even like more deeply in if you pop it like incorrectly. - And then when that thing eventually pops, whether you like it or not, then it fucking hurts and it can start bleeding. - Yeah. - Yeah. - That's the satisfying ones though.

- That's how you know you've got everything out. - Okay, but like, look, granted- - What is your factual basis for this, David? - There's no factual basis for this. - I made this the fuck up. - Okay, granted, right? Like, okay, I get it. Like popping your own pimple, satisfying, right? Because it gets rid of this thing on your face. - There's other people who love popping other people's pimples too. - Yeah, but like, I don't wanna see a random person's pimple getting popped super fucking up close.

And where you can see all the fucking pus and like shit coming out of it. I'm like, that's just gross. I don't want to see that. - Do you think you'd take care of yourself if you, as much, if you weren't a YouTuber? How much less would you take care of yourself if you went on camera? - Well, I can show you a picture of when I was in high school and it's pretty bad. - Yeah. I feel like I would have been the biggest fucking slob on earth if I was on camera. - Oh, 100%. I would be like 300 pounds.

Like I just wouldn't care. - Yeah. - I feel like I take care of myself the same. - I would not. - I would not. - YouTube, like the only thing that I've done because of YouTube is kind of like when I was like, you know, put on makeup, but that was just like, I would have probably done that eventually just because I would just have been searching for a way just to stop these fucking comments every time I see someone. - Yeah.

- I mean, it is frustrating, especially like if, same with like, if for some reason someone sees like a part of my like balding area, every comment is like, oh my God, even though it's saying I've spoke about like a million times. And it's one of those things that unfortunately is just like, it is what it is. And lighting, especially studio lighting, which is very bright and my skin tone reflects. So it's like, oh fuck.

And it's just one of those things where it's like, I don't care about this nearly as much as the comments do. But seeing all those comments is like, dude, can we just talk about the goddamn video? - Yeah, no, exactly. - I get that, I get that. - That's the thing. - And I would never have cared about like finding ways to kind of like, you know, make it better until all these fucking comments were like, hey, you should, you know,

why the fuck are you balding? And it's like, bro, what do you mean why? - Yeah, it's not like I see it- - Like you have a choice. - Some people who post on Reddit like, oh my God, Connor's balding? It's like, what do you mean? Like, yes. - Like, who cares? - I had British genetics. I was fucked from the start.

- Yeah, I mean, it's not like I wake up every day. I'm like, oh my God. - No, no, no, same, same, same. - Sometimes just like a slight annoyance and I'm like, can we talk about the thing that I wanna talk about? And it was just like an easy way just to like stop the comments. But like, even if like I didn't have YouTube, I don't know, I feel like I've never,

I've never put too much effort into like self grooming, but I've never been like full blown degenerates closet. - I feel like I would be a totally different person if I just didn't somehow end up doing these YouTube videos. 'Cause I didn't really care about taking care of myself in any capacity. I was like, I'll just do video games. - The only reason I would take care of myself without the YouTube videos is like for my partner.

Like if my partner is like, oh, you're kind of fucking fat. Then I'll be like, all right, well, you know what? Maybe best to start getting in shape. - Honestly, that's kind of like the best motivation. I want to stay looking good for my wife. I want to stay looking good. And like, sometimes I'm like, yo Sydney, do you want me to get like bigger muscles and like get a six pack? And she's like, no. And I'm like, part of me is just like,

- But what if I did? - But what if I could? - Yo, yo, how much would that make her happy if I did? Even though she says she doesn't wanna see it, I'm like, maybe one day I'm gonna wake up and I'm gonna commit to it. - Will you sacrifice all your great food and drink to get a six pack? 'Cause I'm not.

- No one is worth it. - No amount of physical gratification will compare to a great beer and some god damn good food. - I don't think like, the reason I said six pack is 'cause I don't think it would take me too much work to get a six pack just because I'm so thin.

- Yeah. - As it is that like I've, you know, when I went to the gym more regularly before I was like, actually like, I think quite close to getting a six pack. 'Cause it was like starting to show just because I didn't have to lose too much weight for the muscle to start showing. So that's why I'm just like, maybe, maybe one day. - That's why I was so glad when I also asked the same question, Arkyl was like, would you like it if I was like more toned and like, you know, six pack, maybe not a six pack, but just like more muscly tone. And she's like, no, I like you the way you are. And I was just like, oh, thank God.

- All right, woman hand me my pizza. - Whatever makes you happy, right? - Yeah, yeah. But of course she's gonna say that now. Of course your partner's gonna be like, "No, honey, I love you just the way you are." - But if hypothetically she said, "I would like to see you in a six pack." I would probably try and do my best to give myself a six pack.

- Fair enough. - Because it's like, if that's what makes her happy, then that's what will make me happy, right? - I'd be like, damn, you're in the wrong relationship. - I can call up Johnny Sinsby if you want. He's got a six pack. - I found it very, so the most common, if you ever try to, you know, you take a,

like Rogaine or whatever, any hair medication, like the main one, the one that's like the only one that's like FDA approved, whatever. All the ads that you hear on YouTube and stuff all promote whatever. I just found it so fucking funny that the one side effect to this drug, so you can, they're like, you can stop losing your hair. They're like, there was a side effect there. And you're like, go on. It's like, there is a chance

you may be impotent and you're like, wow, what a cruel trade off. You can feel and look more attractive and have your hair, but you're rolling the dice as if your dick will work. And you're like, God damn.

That's the side, like it could have been anything. It could have been like depression, weight gain, any of those things. - It's all those counterintuitive. - It's like a movie plot. You couldn't design this side effect more perfect for what the cause is. - Yeah, that's the equivalent of being like, you can have the sexiest six pack to get any woman you want, but you have to get a vasectomy.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - No, wait, no, that doesn't, I don't think that would be as much of a, you still have the dick, Joe. - Yeah, you still have it. - All right, we're gonna chop your dick off. - Okay, all right, no, okay. - We're gonna chop your dick off. - Yeah, 'cause I remember, 'cause I had this conversation with Didis before as well, because I told him that I was also taking- - Yeah, he seemed to believe that it would just, no matter what, if you took it, your pee pee don't work.

I told him, I'm like, no, no, no. - So if you do your research, I believe there is a 1% chance. - It's small, it's small. - It's a very, very small chance. I believe it's 1% that you'll just get impotency. - Maybe not impotence, but you feel,

- You're less potent. - It's like you're way less, you have like way less desire for sexual activity and you could, your pee pee might not work as much. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - In that department. - So what? - If that matters to you. - Yeah, so yeah, I told Didis that, yeah, I take this as well. The first thing he says to me- - Yeah, same fucking thing to me.

- Yeah, the first thing he says to me is, "Yo, did you win the gotcha?" And I was like, "What do you mean? What do you mean?" And he goes, "The dick gotcha. Did you win?" And I was just like- - Wait, maybe, okay. 'Cause I had the conversation with him where I was like, he was like, "Yeah, I don't know if I should start taking it." And I was like, "Well, I wish I did research sooner." Because like it completely pretty much stopped any kind of progressive- - Yeah, progressive hair loss. - So it's just normal now. It's not normal, but like it doesn't get worse and it got a little bit better.

And so I was like, dude, if you're even thinking it might happen, you may as well just fucking, if you're worried about it, just start now before you actually are balding or your hairline recedes and you're like, oh well fuck, that's too late. - 'Cause there's no way to regrow hair that's lost without getting a fucking transplant or something. The only way that you can stop yourself, stop you from losing hair is prevention. So you need to get there.

before I know this sounds like an ad read. - Yeah, this is like literally a fucking ad. - This is literally like the keeps ad read, but that's because it's like, I did my research even before getting. - I used to think it was so cringe all those ads that were promoting it. And I was like, this is fucking stupid. Now I'm like, God damn, I wish I fucking started soon. I'm so stupid.

'Cause I think you always think, and I was very guilty of this as well. 'Cause you just, when you're growing up and you have hair for fucking 20 years, you just always think, oh, this is never gonna happen to me. You always think that. And then like, maybe you notice one day. Do you remember the first time you noticed?

- Yes. - How'd you, I mean, do you feel comfortable sharing? - Yeah, yeah, I mean, like, I believe I've told you this in private, but I knew I was gonna bald, basically. Everyone on my dad's side is just bald and has, you know, even if they haven't completely lost hair on the top of it, they've all lost their hair. And it's something- - Why didn't we tell them sooner? Why didn't we know sooner? - Yeah, so I remember, 'cause you know,

- This was back in like the Sasuke hair phase. - My favorite phase. - I like my hair. Okay. And not that, not that, you know, I don't think I could pull off like a bold thing. I just don't, I just don't know if I'm, it's, I just don't know if I'm ready for it to be like my identity. - I mean, you know what I mean? - You've had the benefit of having tried before. - You've got plenty of time to go into that.

- And I've actually had, I have gone through that phase. - You've gone through a trial period before. - I've gone through the trial period of that phase. I know I can pull it off, but you know, I'd like it to be, instead of be like a choice, I'd like it to be a choice rather than a choice that's thrust upon me. - Right, right. - So I remember when I was like, you know, 17, 18,

I was like, dad, everyone on your side of the family is bald. And I remember like what started this conversation was I remember seeing a picture of my dad when he was like, you know, in his like twenties and here he had, he had a lot of hair. He had hair down to fucking here. He's had, he had more hair than I have. - That's always the case. - Yeah, yeah. He's had more hair than I ever did in my life. And I was just like,

"Oh, dad, you used to have a lot of hair." He's like, "Yep." - Thanks for bringing it up. - And I was like, "So like out of curiosity,

"When did you start losing it?" And he was like, "Oh, I don't remember. "I think it was like around like 30 or something." - That could have been nice. - I've never forgotten this conversation in my life 'cause I remember, this conversation is engraved in my mind because as soon as I heard that, as soon as I hit 25, I was like,

I started taking pictures and it is literally you going through the five stages of denial. - Yeah, you do. - As you are like tracking it, right? - I must have just parted it weird. I must have just been laid out with it. - My hair doesn't go in this direction. - Everyone has a little dog. - Yeah, of course. - So like I started regularly taking pictures of like my scalp since I was around the age of like 25, 26. And I was like, ha,

I've beaten the genetics. 25 years old, beaten the genetics. - I pulled the gotcha. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Age of 26. My dad's talking shit. I have a full head of hair, baby. 27.

"Ah, maybe that's a bad angle. "Is that a bad angle? "That might just be a bad angle. "I still look good, baby." Age 28. Nah, I mean like that's like a normal hairline. That's, you know, everyone who gets old has like a little bit of like a little bit of receding recession there. I forgot what it was called. - Widow's peak. - Huh? - Widow's peak. - Widow's peak. That's just a widow's peak. That's just a widow's peak. Age 29. This is when I've like fully moved to Japan for like, you know,

like the first year, I was like, it could be, it could be. Like, you know what? You know what? I know this looks like a bad picture. I know this looks like a bad picture, but maybe.

- Maybe it's just a bad picture, bad lighting, bad lighting. - Gotta get a new phone. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it was when I hit the age of 30, I just had like, there was like one awful picture and there was like one video where I believe the back of my head was showing up. I think it might've been like the drifting special or something. And I'm like,

I'm like, okay, acceptance time. I am losing my hair, but it still doesn't look super, it doesn't look too bad. So that's when I started doing like a lot of research into this. And ever since I started taking,

I started taking the pill. It's not gotten any worse. It's gotten like slightly better, nowhere near as good as when I started tracking it when I was like 20, 25 or whatever, but it's not gotten any worse, you know, which is a good thing, which is a good thing. - Yeah, it was very strange. Did I ever tell you the story about how I asked my dad how he lost his hair? - No. - I was like, "Dad, how did you know

'cause he had like a giant bald area. And I was like, how did that happen? He straight up fucking lied. He lied to me. - I escaped from a house fire. - He said that like while he was working, something dropped on his head and that ever since then, he hasn't been able to grow hair there. And as a fucking kid, I just believe him.

And so going into my adulthood, I just had that in the back of my mind when I think about it. And then now I realize the motherfucker lied to me. Why would he not just tell his kid that, "Hey, you bald sometimes, you just lose it." - Yeah, see- - What the fuck? - In my family's case, I wasn't even the one that brought up the question. My parents used to just fucking give me shit about it being like, "Motherfucker, you're gonna go bald."

- Yeah, you're like, "What the hell?" - Because my granddad started actually getting a full patch here at 26, 25. And he was like, "Sucks to be you, Joey. "That's gonna happen to you." And I'm just shitting my pants all throughout high school. - I feel like that's the right way to go about it. Because I feel like I- - I wish I was talked about to me more. That it could be a thing that could happen that, "Hey, if you wanna do something about it, "you sound about it now." - 'Cause one thing I've realized, one thing I've realized, right?

Especially in this case. The only reason I was like, I was super attentive about like my hairline and whether I was going bald or not because swear to mother fucking God, every time I'd ask a loved one if I looked any worse, they'd just be like, "No, you're not balding. "Don't worry about it, honey." Whether it's like fucking Sydney or my mom, my mom, my mom, full on Asian fucking mom being like, "Honey, you're not gonna bald. "Don't worry about it. "It's just in your head."

And it was only when I showed her pictures of when I turned 30 that she actually just like, and I was like, "Mom, this is my hairline right now. Yo, you want to go back on your word? Because if I wasn't taking pictures, this is where I'd be right now, mom." - Yeah, I mean, to be honest, like if I ever see like a little

you see a little bit of hair, like someone's head through the hair. You're like, oh, well, it's not a, you don't think of it as like a bald spot. You're just like, I could just see their scalp. But I guess when it gets bigger is when it's, there's a very thin line between when it looks like you're balding and when it's just like, I can just see their scalp. But you keep track and then you notice. I remember one time, oh my God, I must've been like 21. And I just was like, huh, just saw something in the mirror. 'Cause I somehow saw the back of my head and I was like, that's,

It feels like my hair has been done differently. It definitely wasn't there when I checked a few months ago. And I was like, no, I can't bald him like 21. This wouldn't happen. But yeah, sure enough it was. And it wasn't getting any worse for a while. And then it suddenly just got started getting a lot worse. And I was like, oh shit, I gotta do something about this. Or I gotta just shave it all off. Which I'm happy to do, but I'm like, man, it'd be nice to have it for a few more years. - What's the point for you where you're just like, all right, it's gonna go.

I guess if it ever gets to the point where it just from no matter what kind of like, 'cause right now it only looks really bad if like studio lighting is shined on my fucking head and you can very much see just an angle of my head. It's like, all right, well that just looks like shit.

in a normal day, it doesn't look that bad and you can't tell unless I'm like fucking showing you my goddamn scalp. And it's like, all right, well, I may as well just enjoy having hair for a little while. And then it gets to the point where if it always just looks bad or it always looks like it's thinned out, I'm like, well, I'll just get rid of it. I'm not too worried about it. I'm pretty, am I touching it now? I'm like, if it ever looks like shit, I'll just shave it all off. I'm not too bothered about going bald.

I'm kind of like, whatever, but if I can enjoy it. - But there's that weird stigma, right? Of people being like, oh, I don't want to like lose it all. So they just like try and fucking hold onto it because they're afraid of going bald. And I'm like, there's nothing wrong with being bald.

- Yeah, I'm kind of, you know, that'll be the next arc in my life. - There's a lot of dudes who look fucking great. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm just enjoying it now. - I think it's the choice thing. - Yeah, I want a choice. - Yeah, yeah. It's not about not being able to rock a bold look 'cause so many guys can. It's about having the choice of having like, 'cause it kind of just feels like an identity, right? 'Cause once you like commit to being bold, it's kind of like a big identity shift, right? And it's like, yeah.

a lot of people rock it and like fucking good on you guys. But I feel like a lot of guys are just like, I could rock the bald look, but I like having the choice of whether I can like style my hair or not, or just being stuck with this one look for my entire life. - It would be pretty fucking hilarious if Trash Taste goes on for a lot longer and it just ends up being three bald dudes on a podcast.

- You could see the arc. - Yeah, yeah. It's the bold arc. - The bold arc. - Yeah, but like any advice to like any guys who are worried about this, like just honestly keep track of it because your memory sucks. Your memory fucking sucks. If you think,

if you think that you're balding, you probably are balding, because you'll be like, "Oh, I don't know. Did I look any different one year ago?" Let's be honest, you don't remember what you looked like one year ago. You don't remember if it's receded like one millimeter or whatever. But if you actually genuinely take pictures, that is like concrete evidence of, okay, I'm actually progressing.

my hairline is actually progressing and I can like visually see it versus just you asking a mate being like, do I look like I'm balding?

they're gonna say no. Because if we see them- - Unless it's like super significant. - Yeah, unless it's super significant. But at the end of the day, like if you see someone every day, you don't like normally see like a clear change. Like I remember, I still will always remember this where Connor talks about like being a bit overweight before like trash tasting shit like that. And in my mind I was like, Connor's talking shit. Connor's actually talking shit. But I've seen Connor so many times that like his weight change before like he moved to Japan and before like,

he started taking YouTube more seriously. Like his weight change was so gradual to me that I just did not, I didn't register it at all. - Because now when I look back and look at like old photos of when you guys were like first visiting Japan, I'm just like, oh. - Yeah, yeah. - Wow, okay. - Yeah, it definitely was bigger. But like, you know, I was losing it pretty healthily, like the way I was losing it. I wasn't doing it like rapidly. - No, it wasn't like overnight. - Yeah. - You know, I was, I stuck to eating the chicken and broccoli for like four or five months and worked out a lot.

and I'm sure as shit I lost weight. - Exactly. - It fucking sucked, but it was way easier as well 'cause I didn't have as much of a social life. Like I find now that having a social life and going out and talking to people and having dinners with people is so much harder to actually like keep like on like an actual diet for me. - Yeah. - But you know, and it requires a lot more self-control and back then it was a lot easier for me. - 'Cause I had the opposite problem where like I used to be hella skinny. - Yeah, you were, dude, I mean, you look at like the first episode of "Trash Taste,"

It was like crazy. - Oh yeah, I remember that. - I look like a different person. - It's crazy how even just a few, not even going from like, it's not like you ever got like overweight or underweight, but like just how changing your weight in any capacity really makes you look different, but you don't notice it in the moment. - Not at all. - I've been considering, so Sydney recently has gotten like ICL, it's kind of like eye surgery.

And I think my stigmatism has gotten worse again. I don't know. I saw this really interesting, I find information in the weirdest way sometimes. And there was just this random Twitter thread

just detailing the like what people with astigmatism see. And I've never just had a moment where just this holy shit moment that just like me for real, because I just thought there's so many things that I just thought were just everyone saw. And then I saw this thread detailing, this is what you have, this is what things will look like if you have astigmatism. And this is gonna sound like the biggest fucking

but there is a reason why I find the light mode easier to read and follow. And like this thread details, yeah, you actually like the way that the lighting works and the ways that you see like perceived letters and thin lines.

things are clearer if it's like a light background. - Light mode is probably the thing that's giving you a stigmatism at this point. - It's so fucking bright. - Light mode's gonna blind you. - It's just like a never ending loop of like, oh, my eyesight's shit, use light mode, use light mode, my eyesight gets worse. - Yeah, but Sydney got these, Sydney got ICL surgery recently and I've never been,

more jealous of someone in my life. She just wakes up every day and she's like, "My God, I have perfect eyesight. It's even better than where I wear contacts." I know, right? Fucking, what does it feel like, guys? What does it feel like? Tell me, tell me. - Take it for granted. - Yeah, 'cause I remember I saw, I think it was a Twitter thread or a Reddit thread or something like years ago,

of like this guy who used to do like watercolor paintings of like landscapes and he would like paint the same picture differently depending on what your eyesight level was. So like the worst eyesight you had, the more like faded out the same picture looked.

And I remember I saw that back in like, you know, the beginning of doing YouTube and stuff like that. And I'm just like, oh, that looks like it fucking sucks. And so I started wearing the blue light glasses 'cause I was just like, well, I don't want my, I don't want to fucking wake up looking at that. I'll try and prolong it as much as possible. Obviously my eyesight is gonna get worse the older I get. That's just like natural deterioration. But like, I don't want it to like increase considering I'm staring at a fucking screen all day for my job. - Right. - Yeah.

But yeah, I really want to get it, but I'm...

I don't know, I have this issue called just being chronically lazy. I remember seeing this YouTube video, right? That details like, "Girls, what do you not understand about guys?" Right? And one of the replies in this Reddit thread was, "I don't understand why guys would just refuse to go to an appointment unless you specifically book it for them and force them to go." And I'm like, "Shit."

I've never been called out so more like so accurately in my life. 'Cause like I've realized that I will never, like I could have like an issue that's been bothering me for like months and months. And it's all sorted by just going to like, just sorting out like a simple appointment. But I will never do it myself unless like my, unless fucking Sydney does it for me. - I have that exact same problem with like, not even like appointments, just like places I wanna go.

I could walk past the place and be like, oh, that looks pretty sick. And they'll talk about it days later. And Aki's just waiting and being like, so we're gonna go or what? And the only reason I go is because she books it for me. And I'm like, oh, I've always wanted to go. And I'm like, why did I never just do this myself?

- Oh my God, why is that a thing? - And another comment was, another comment which was just like, there's one, Sydney asked me this all the time, right?

where like a girl like walks past each other in the street. They have like a five second conversation and they could tell like what their best friend has been doing for the entire past two weeks. Guy goes on a tramping, guys go on a camping trip together, spends like three days together. You go back home and she asks, "What'd you guys talk about?" And you just go, "I don't know."

- That's every time I go out drinking with the boys. - Yeah, right? - Every time I'm just like, we even have it with Trash Taste as well. I mean like, I come home from a Trash Taste recording, Aki's like, "Oh, what did you guys talk about in this episode?" And I'm like, "Not much." Fuck, what did we talk about? Probably nothing important.

It's whatever. - Sydney's like, "I cannot understand how you could spend the entire weekend with all of these guys and not know what you guys talked about." Like, how does that work? - It's that meme of the girlfriend lying in the bed being like, "They're probably talking shit about the other girls." And then the guys are just like,

I'm like, I don't fucking remember what we talked about. - I guess most conversations feel so inconsequential. Like they're just kind of like normal conversations where like, I don't even remember like conversation where I'm like, that was weird. - Yeah, right? - That was unusual. - I just know sometimes like even I can have like, you know, sometimes I do have like deep conversations with my fellow bros, but,

put in the moment of just like, what did you guys talk about? My ability to like get that memory back is just like impossible unless there's something that reminds me, oh yeah, I had this conversation and we talked about this. I remember all the details of this super deep conversation that we had. But if you ask me, oh, what'd you guys talk about? And I'd be like, oh fuck.

- Meanwhile, girls have this like fucking perfect photographic memory of every little thing they talked about. So much so to the point where they start like dissecting it with you and it's just like, all I asked was what did you talk about? I wasn't waiting for an analysis. - Yeah, if there's one thing that I've noticed as, okay, as a guy, something I will never understand about girls, right? Is sometimes you,

you meet girls that who are like really good friends. And it's just like the moment I know that there are girls who are like super, super good friends is for some reason, like they can tell when each other's periods are coming.

And I'm like, I'm just like that. That is something that is beyond my level of understanding. And I thought it was just like a one person thing. But the more girls I talk to, the more I'm like, oh no, yeah. I know when all my mates is periods are. - Does everyone just have like tundra level

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Like I smell one- - This should sound weird. - I smell 1% more iron in the air today. - Yeah, it's like girls, I know what everyone's menstrual cycle is actually. Like I'm just like this- - I have a chart right here. - This is something that is beyond my level of understanding as a guy, you know? I don't know how accurate it is for girls, but I see it, I hear it about it.

every so often like in conversation when I talk to like- - Meanwhile guys don't even realize if another borough has had a haircut. It's like, it could be the most obvious shit. And you'd be like two hours into a conversation with your friend and be like, "Oh, did you get a haircut by the way?"

- Why are we so dull? - That's so fucking true. - You just don't pay attention to stuff like that. - Yeah, clearly not. Yeah, because when it changes too much, like our producer who had dyed his hair one day, completely blonde. And I remember my first reaction when walking into the office because the hair color was different was, I don't recognize this person. It wasn't like, it's just.

- That's me with anime characters. I don't fucking know these characters. - That's why they never change their hair. - What color is their hair again? - That's why they never change their hair. - Yeah, that's the one. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - God. - Why are we like this? - The absolute state of men, man. - Also, I don't know if this is the thing necessarily about girls, but it's always moms, right? - Okay. - Moms in particular.

when you've lost a little bit of weight or you've gained a little bit of weight. Even if you're not aware of it, it's just like every time it's like, I could be meeting like a friend's mom or like, you know, a friend, you know, just some mom of a friend that I know or whatever. - Whose moms you meeting? - I meet a lot of moms, you know? I should probably, I should bring you along. - Who needs this many moms, the fuck? - And they're always just like, you gained a bit of weight or you've lost a bit of weight. And I'm like,

- No, I haven't. - I feel like that's an- - And then I go home and I check and I'm like, wow, I have lost a bit of weight. How the fuck did you know? - I feel like that's an Asian mom thing. They can always tell. They have like a scale in their minds. - Asian mom conversation started one on one. - Bro, there are some mom abilities that I just don't fucking understand. Like how is it, okay. How is it that,

you've misplaced something. You've spent the entire fucking day looking for this like mobile phone or keys or something that you've misplaced. And you're like, "Mom, I don't know what this is." They have a fucking radar.

built into their mind to be like, I know where you've misplaced it. I'm gonna find it within one second. - Aki has like superhuman abilities with that shit. Like I could be like something super insignificant. Like, oh, do you know where the roll of tape is? I fucking searched everywhere in this house. And she's just sitting on the couch being like, my room, second drawer, right at the back. And I go there and it's there. I'm like, what?

- Yeah, I have really bad memory with where I play stuff. I put like trackers on everything that's important. - Yeah, you do. - I have trackers on my wallet. I have trackers on my expensive headphones. I have trackers on my keys, my passport, my...

I have like a tracker on everything that's kind of valuable and I need. 'Cause it's not even that I got tired of losing it potentially like permanently. It was like, I was tired of that fucking five minute shit where I left to look around my house to find where it is. I'm like, you know what? I just wanna get rid of that. I'm just gonna have it so that if I lose it, I'm like, all right, let's play a little game. - I've done this thing now where I've had the exact same problem 'cause I had a bad habit of just leaving shit all over the house. I now have this thing where I just have this one little box

that just has all my important shit in it. - I have that too, but I somehow just- - You still lose it? - I put shit in the wrong place sometimes. - Skill issue. - So yeah, that's been very helpful for me, except I have these like running headphones that I like as well and the two smalls put a tracker on. And so I keep losing them still and it's driving me insane.

- I tried that once and then how do your trackers work? So do you have like a beeper? - Yeah, it's like a thing and it plays a little ringing sound. - It's the tile things, right? - Yeah, tile. I have tile. I don't think they're as good as the Apple one, but they work well enough. - Yeah, I lost the thing that beeps like,

- Oh, it's just an app on my phone. - Oh, it's just an app? I probably lose my phone to like, I lose the thing to find the thing that I've lost. I need my keys, where's my phone? Fuck, where's my phone? - Here's the best thing about it. If you have any of the things, there's a button that you can double tap and then it rings your phone. For example, let me show you. So I'm gonna, this is just an advertile. - Yeah, this is an advertile. - Like my wallet, right? I have this card that goes in there. And then I press this button twice.

- Oh, cool. - Then that's my phone. - Yeah. - Yeah, that's how it works. Isn't that easy? Isn't that easy? - Okay, but here's the question. What if you lose your phone annual? - Then as long as I have one item that's still my bike, my keys, my passport. - Right. - As long as I have something that I can, then I'll be fine. - Right. - See, I feel like, because I do have a finder and her name's Sydney.

Like Aki, I feel like there must be like some, it must be something to do with maternal instincts, right? Because what I've noticed is that when we first started dating, we've dated for like almost 10 years now. She wasn't, she was as shit as me. She just didn't know where she would place things. I would ask her if she'd seen one certain thing that I'd misplaced and she would nowhere near find it.

And then in like the past two, three years, she's suddenly just gained this ability to be like, "Yeah, your keys are in the top drawer by your beds. You left them there." And I'm like, "How the fuck do you know this? When did you develop this ability?"

And I'm like- - They're playing Sims in creative. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - They see the whole house from like top down, being like, it's right there. And I'm like, oh no, is this a mom thing that's like being developed here? - It must be. - Is this a maternal, is this a superpower that all moms get? - It's definitely not a dad thing. - It is not a dad thing at all. - Maybe we're just getting stupider. - Maybe. - Or it's a dad thing where like the mom thing is the superhuman strength to find shit. The dad thing is the superhuman strength to lose shit.

- It just balances out perfectly. - I like the idea that every time you just come, you get stupider. Your body thinks like you're becoming a dad. You're just like, oh, you're a dad. So now you become, every time you nut, you just lose an IQ point. - Yeah. - Do you feel like you are more like your mom or your dad or somewhere perfectly in between? - Like personality wise? - Can I say the answer? I figure I'm like none of them.

Can I say that? Is that the answer? Like the mailman? - Also, like you don't have any like traits that you do to your mom and dad, like that are obvious? - If I- - Your mom and dad are crying right now. - Yeah. - Yeah. - It's like, we didn't know how to tell you son, but you did it for us. - Maybe more like my mom. I feel like I'm nothing like my dad.

I don't know. It's very tough. Do you feel like you have a lot in common with your mom and dad? - I feel like when I was like a kid, I was way more like my mom. I don't know. I had like a- - I think that's very common with sons though. I think like sons, when you're younger, you very much go after your mom. Even in terms of like looks as well. And then as you get older, you start to look more like your dad. 'Cause I was definitely that.

Like when I was a kid, I looked like full fucking Japanese kid. I looked exactly like my mom. And as I'm getting older, I'm looking less like my mom, more like my dad. - I feel like that way in personality as well. The more I grow older, the more I'm like, fuck.

- This is something my dad would do. This is something my dad would say. And my mom's, I'm gonna call my mom for a second. My mom's been like in full fucking copium mode for the past like three years because I'm like, I keep doing things. I'm like, I feel like I'm becoming my dad. My mom's like, no.

You're still like me, okay? You're still like me. You're still my son. You're more like me. You're more like me. And I'm like, mom, I think I'm becoming more like my dad. I'm not gonna lie. - My mom's just like pointed out to me. - Why does your mom want you to be more like you? - I don't know. - I don't know. - It's just the pride. - Yeah, it's just the pride. - I am the better one. - I'm the better parent. - You should develop more things from me because I am more.

- I've been noticing like, I even sound like my dad now. It's to the point where I pick up the phone and people think it's my dad sometimes. - Yeah, I have that too. - Did you have that as well? - Yeah, my grandma mistook me for my dad once. - I've never had that. - Yeah, it's scary. And also just like, there's just the small little things that you notice is just normal now until someone points it out and being like, you didn't use to do that. Like even just like doing that thing of like, when you come back home and you sit down, you make that kind of,

- Like sound? Like I never used to do that. - Well, my favorite thing is there's a shot of you as you like, I don't know why, I think you're in one of your Manga Cafe videos. You're like looking at like the books. You're looking at it like such a fucking old man. And like you're holding like your one hand in the pocket, one hand on coffee going. - There are so many times where I find myself now in everyday life doing the dad stand. Where you just kind of, when you're looking at things, you just like.

- Like, what is this? What is this? - I have noticed you've been doing that. - I never used to do that. - So we're getting old. - I hate it. - Is it just like you reach a certain age and just every dad just agrees to like do the same thing and have like the same sense of humor as well? - Must be.

- Do you think dad jokes are actually dad jokes or were they funny at their age and then they just couldn't stop making them? - No, I've just come to the conclusion now that dad jokes used to be not funny. Now I find them fucking hilarious.

- I've been finding that joke. - And I hate it. - You know, it's like the- - How old are you guys again? - Okay, it's the- - You're still in your twenties, Joe. - Give it a couple of years. - Look, look, look, look, look. It's the irony thing. It's the irony cycle where you start saying something ironically and you're like, "I'm saying it ironically 'cause I'm getting old." And then somewhere along the line, I start saying it because I actually, I say it and I'm like, I start laughing to myself. I'm like,

- It's no longer ironic, man. - You get to the point where you say something in a facetious tone, not only because you want the message to come across, but you also just find it hilarious. Where you just like, you say something facetious and then there's a voice in the back of your head that was like, "Nice one, Joey."

- You know what I mean, right? - Oh my God. - I hate that we're able to connect on this. - Oh my God. - No, I'm not becoming like my dad. - You'll get there Connor, don't worry. You'll get there. - I don't think I'll ever get there. - You'll get there, don't worry. You're British, you'll get there. - I won't get there, I won't. I'll always be fun. - I'll always be hip with the kids. - I'll always be one with the fellow generational kids. - I feel like as you know,

if you didn't have YouTube, if you didn't have YouTube, you'd probably grow more into like your dad. I get that. I get that energy from you. Your dad's very chilled, very relaxed. As like one of the most, he's a bloke, man. He's a bloke. - He's a top bloke. - He's an old British man just living his best life. - Top bloke, man. - Watching football, drinking beer. That's what he does. - Meanwhile, I'm just becoming more and more like my dad.

And it's like, I don't know if that's a good thing or not because my dad's pretty cool, but yeah, it's a worry in a sense. - Yeah, I'm definitely becoming like my dad. I've realized the more I've grown older, the more my dad just finds comfort in just doing nothing.

and just being chill with life. And it's like for him to like go out and do something, it's like my mom that has to like pressure him to be like, oh, let's go here. Let's go visit this person. And it's not like my dad doesn't enjoy it, but my dad will refuse. My dad would never do it if it's just by his own volition. And I'm like, shit.

This is just me and Sydney. - The moment you guys can start calling me out is if we ever go out drinking and then in mid conversation I go, "Oh, sorry, boys, I'm fucking shit-faced." - I remember you did that once on tour. Do you remember that? You did that once? - Did I? - And I was like, I remember telling you. - That's just one thing I wanna adopt. - 'Cause you were shit-faced and like Joey, you did exactly the same thing as your dad.

- I will never forget that moment. - God damn it. - The race is gonna keep increasing as I get older. - Fuck sake. I do not believe that there are people who do not piss in the shower.

That's a genuine belief. 'Cause I could not imagine, you know, I don't understand if it was like a communal shower or whatever like that, you know, if you were sharing- - Like a public shower. - Okay, yeah. You know, I didn't do that in my university dorms or whatever, but in your own house, come on. - Yeah, I piss in my own shower. - Yeah, yeah. We all agree with that, yeah? - Yeah. - Well, you were like, no, a second ago. - Well, I try not to. - Oh, okay. - Yeah, I try and like pee before I go on the shower.

- Yeah, but you're about to like flush a bunch of water away with the shower anyway. - Dude, if it's yellow, let it mellow.

- I don't flush all my pisses. - Oh my God. - Unless it's like giga yellow, I just let that shit mellow out. - Oh my God, asparagus day? - Asparagus day, yeah, I'm flushing that shit. - I don't know, sometimes, yeah, I mean, if it's yellow, you gotta flush that shit, man. That shit stinks. - Yeah, but sometimes if you've been drinking a lot of water, your piss is like basically clear.

- Yeah, I just drink it. - I'm like, why let this go to waste? - Like, "Talk me up, doc." - Right on tap. - No, like if you've been drinking a lot of water or just, you know, drinking a lot of fluids, then your pee is like very clear. And in that case, you're not gonna see the difference and it's not gonna smell. So I'm just like, sometimes I just can't be bothered. - I hate the first morning pee. - Oh, first morning pee is like giga yellow. - That's why it's just so like, it's just so yellow. - Frothy. - Not frothy, hang on, what the fuck?

- You got froth? - You know I can get some frothy pisses. - What the fuck, you got frothy, what you got a Bud Light piss? What the hell? - Sometimes like the force that it goes in, it just bubbles up. - Oh my God. - It's gross, sorry. - Do you like the feeling first thing in the morning? You know, sometimes it's like a cold day or something like that. I don't know why I like this feeling because I only get it when I wake up first thing in the morning, but you have a- - The corny shake? - What? - Do you get that in the winter? - What? - When it's like a really, really cold day,

and you're holding in a piss and while you're peeing, your body just kind of. - I have had that. I have had that. I didn't know that. - I know exactly what, shit. - I didn't know this was a thing. - I thought it was just a me thing. - It's because I remember I looked into it because I was like, why the fuck, like what is wrong with me? And so I looked into it. Apparently that's your body's way because you're releasing a lot of heat.

from inside your body 'cause your pee is body temperature, right? So the body releasing all of that heat all at once, your body just goes into like a little, like a shiver because now your core body temperature is a little bit cooler. - Have you ever tried pissing in the dark?

- What do you mean? Of course I have. - Yeah? - How good is your aim? - Fucking amazing, my aim's great. - How good is your aim? - Oh, as in like in the middle of the night? - Yeah, yeah, okay. It's the middle of the night. Okay, you're with a group of people and you don't want to turn the lights on.

And also you don't wanna piss on like the water as well. 'Cause you know, that'll wake people up. - I just sit down. - You just sit down? - Yeah. - Shit, I should do that, man. - Yeah, I just sit down. I'm like, I've had too many instances where I thought the bowl was here, it was actually over here. And I'm like, oh, that sounds like it's not going in the bowl at all. And I turned the line on like,

- It has happened a few times when I've had the piss of faith. Where you position them where you think the toilet is. You don't wanna wake people up. It's the middle of the night and yeah, it's the piss of faith and you find out within- - Why do you not wanna turn the light on? Because I don't wanna blind myself.

- Yeah, sometimes you don't wanna blind yourself and sometimes you just don't wanna wake people up as well. - How's the light gonna wake them up? - For me, if I- - I'd be with the door open, I guess. - Yeah, yeah. Actually, if I piss at night, I never turn the lights on just because when I turn the lights on, even if it's just for like- - Why are you on nightmare difficulty for pissing?

- I don't know, like my, 'cause my brain, my brain weird. As soon as I see like lights, it's like my brain's like signal to be like, "Oh, you wake up now." - Why is this the only time you're going dark mode?

Every other moment of your life, you're like, "Brightness, now!" Except when you pee for some reason. - Okay, that's only when I wake up in the middle of the night, to be fair, because my brain is wired in a way to be like, if I see light mode or if I see light- - You're gonna wake up. - I'm going to wake up. And I've had it a few times where, like the worst thing is, is like,

- 'Cause I know how my body works and sometimes the worst thing is when I have like a midnight shit. And when I just wake up someday and I'm like, I need to shit. - I sleep better after I have the poop. But I don't have poops at night time. But like if I pee when I really needed to pee, it helps me get to sleep.

- So my parents actually, last time I went back to my parents' place, they figured out the perfect solution to it. - Oh my God, your fucking toilet. - They had fucking LED lights underneath the rain. - No way. - I literally, I remember I went home last time. It's been like first time I went home since COVID, right? So I'm like,

I'm looking around the house, looking for small changes being like, oh, that's moved or like they added this or whatever. I walk into the toilet and just immediately game a toilet. It's just like blue LED. - It does look like Republic of Game. - But I was like, this is so genius because now I don't have to sit down 'cause I can see exactly where it is and it's not blinding me. - I love sit pissing though. I way prefer it.

- I don't mind it. - What do you mean? It's my preferred go-to. - But sometimes I just can't be bothered to like pull my pants all the way down. - You pull them all the way down. You don't have to put them on your fucking ankles every time, bro. You can put them a little bit down. - I can't sit prissed, bro. - Why? - I don't know. You know me with my like shits, right? - Because sit down equals poo poo time. That's why.

- What is going on with your simple chimp brain where sitting down makes you want to poop? - Okay, you know me. I hate the feeling of like not being like empty. If I sit down and poop, if I don't empty myself- - You can empty yourself and sit down with peeing. - Yeah, but like if I sit down sometimes it's like, oh, this is a half, this has gone from like a quick one minute pee to like a half hour thing now. - You've nerfed yourself.

- You just nerfed your entire body for some weird fucking reason. - Sometimes my body, I like- - Overcome this feeling Garnt, get past it. - I've learned to live with my body. I know my body's limits and I know- - This is the name of your fucking autobiography, "Learning With Limits." - Living with my body. - Yeah, yeah. If I sit down there are times when I'm like, "Oh shit, I need to go." And then as soon as like that, as soon as that has hit my brain, I'm like, "Oh."

I'm stuck here now. I can't stand up until- - Yeah, you have the phantom shit. - Do you feel like as an adult, you're just bewildered, like you're beholden to the weird perks you've picked up from being a kid and that you're like, "Well, I can't change anything now."

- There are some perks that I have picked up. Like I used to be able to sleep no matter what the situation was anywhere. And now sleep is just, it's not harder, but there are like certain, I've noticed there are certain preset conditions for me to get a good night's sleep.

And I've never had that before in my life. - I need the room. - Okay, what is the? - For me, I need the room to be pitch fucking light. - No. - Yeah. - I can't have any amount of light. I'm like, if the curtain is like slightly open, I'm closing that shit all the way. I know it makes no difference, but I found that if it's pitch black, no, I can't do it.

- I love waking up and my room is fucking bright as shit. - I don't mind that in the morning, but the problem is, is that like the light coming from outside during the night keeps me up.

- Oh, no, it doesn't do that for me. - Yeah, so I need to be like completely like basically the equivalent to just shutting your eyes in a dark room in order for me to sleep. - There's not a lot of light in my window, so I guess it's fine. - I have like a big fucking window in my bedroom. So it's like, I need that curtain all the way closed. No crack of light at all. - Part of the reason that I felt so tired every day on tour was just the fact that I was not waking up to natural sunlight.

- Yeah. - And because of that reason, my body was just like continually tired as after I woke up. - Yeah, I hated it. - I need sunlight to wake up. - I remember we had this conversation as well. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. - I think that's just like everyone though, right? - I feel like I need- - No. - Really? - No, Chris absolutely does not want the curtains open or blinds open at any point.

- Whenever we share rooms, I'm like, oh my God, we have to fucking like bunker the whole fucking room down to make sure one crumb of light doesn't get in the room. So Chris will wake up furious in the middle of the night. - Yeah, I think that's why I kind of gel with Chris whenever we're sleeping in the same hotel room. Problem is still can't get to sleep because he snores like a motherfucker. - So goddamn loud.

- Yeah, I need like a half hour to an hour cool down period before I actually like, like some people can just like go to sleep like that. I need like a cool down period when I just lay on the bed and just chill out, like get low to sleep.

- Yeah, I'm the equivalent of like when you turn your computer off and then it starts updating. I need that to finish before I can actually go to sleep. - Most of the time I'm pretty tired by the time I get to bed. So as long as I get in a position that I think my brain has tricked myself like this is a sleeping position. I think I fall asleep pretty quickly. - Yeah, like I was saying earlier, when I wake up to go for like a midnight piss or like a midnight shit, when I just wake up because I didn't go to the toilet beforehand,

I have like a timer and I know like it's weird because I can't- - I kinda get what you mean. - I consciously know that there's a timer. So when I take a shit, if I don't shit fast enough, there's a timer for my brain to be like, okay, you are asleep enough to go back to sleep too. Oh, you're awake. - I kinda get that. - You're awake now and you're not going to sleep. And you took too long to shit.

The timer has run out. - Your shit timer has run out. - Your shit timer has run out. Brain awake, you do not go back to sleep. And I'm like, I hate that. 'Cause I can physically feel my brain waking up. I'm like, no, no, come on. - That's like one thing I'm glad my body got rid of is that like I used to take midnight shits every night. - Well, you can kind of- - When I was in high school, but now I don't do it anymore. - I'm pretty sure you can somehow control your bowel movements. I don't know.

- That is like, teach me master. I need to know the ways. - Just hold that shit in. - I'm pretty sure, 'cause like I poop at the exact same time near enough every single day. - Same.

And I don't know if that's good or bad, but I feel like I know how to change it if I want, but I don't know how. - For me, it's not so much like the same time of day. - There's basically no fucking sense. - Yeah, for me, it's not so much the same time of day. For me, it's the same point of while I'm awake. - Yeah, pretty much. - It's like for me, it's like no matter what time I wake up, an hour after I'm up, I'm shitting. - Yeah.

- It could be like 6:00 AM, it could be fucking 1:00 PM. It's like always. - I need my morning shit as much as I need my morning shower. That's how ingrained it is into my cycle. That's why I'm the only one that actually had to stop the bus on tour to go shit. Just because on that particular day- - I can hold it.

- I can't hold him. - I can't hold him. I woke up early. I woke up like, I say woke up early. I think we were just on a very long drive and it was like 9:00 AM and I woke up and I'm like, oh no, I've woken up and the bus is still moving. And then I remember thinking- - The clock starts ticking down. - I remember thinking, 'cause I think we were driving through Utah and it was like such a beautiful landscape. And I woke up, I go into like the living room and like our tour family is just like, oh my God.

I look at like, look at like the Utah mountains and Mike's next to me like, yo bro, this is so fucking beautiful. And I'm like, yeah, it's a beautiful. And inside I was like, I feel it coming. The shit's coming. Just distract yourself. Just distract yourself. Look at, look at the landscape. And I remember everyone kept commenting on the landscape. And all I could think about was how much I needed to shit in this very moment and how close we were. - It's like, yeah, yeah, that's a great place to take a shit.

Literally I was like, we're pretty isolated right now. Maybe I could like get away with this, you know? Maybe I could. - Move in the wilderness. - Or shitting yourself? - No, going up to like a fucking- - I don't care. I was like, what, you gonna shit yourself on the bus? - I can get away with it. I could go over like one of these mounds and no one would see me. - Your sleeping position.

- Do you sleep stomach, back, side? - I cannot sleep anything but on my back. - Yeah. Well, for me it's either back or right side. - Yeah, but so I thought I was a side sleeper, but I realized I'm more of a like third side, two thirds stomach. I'm kind of like this. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. - So I'm kind of like side, but with my stomach leaning towards the bed. I cannot sleep on my back. I do not know why. - Really? - I'm unable to sleep on my back.

I've tried many times and I can't fall asleep. - I feel like, I don't know. I feel like as- - And I wanna learn. - Do you still sleep that worn futons as well?

- Yeah, yeah. - Okay, okay. - Always on my sides and I kind of use my arms as like support. - 'Cause I feel like the reason I sleep on my back was just because as a kid, you know, every time you go to Asia, sometimes you don't have a bed to sleep on, you sleep on kind of like a futon or some covers on the floor. And it's just impossible to do that unless you're sleeping on your back, I feel like. - I like my arms crumpled up feeling though. I'm squishing them against the floor.

I love it. It feels nice. - I have this thing where I like develop what I call T-Rex arms when I sleep, where I'm just fucking like this. - No, I do that too. Yeah, it's a nice thing. - Yeah, I've seen that. - My favorite strat is the arm under the pillow. But know where my head is, just like pillow here. - Right in front, right? - Yeah, right in front. I love that feeling of just a slight elevation. I don't know why, it's so good.

- I feel like I'm in a sci-fi movie when I sleep because I need to be perfectly like straight like that. Like I'm going to cry asleep. - Dude, I would be terrified if I fucking robbed Garnt's house and I just see a man in the bed like this. And then Garnt, he hears a rustling and you just sit like, Guy just goes like,

- One was not fucking T100. - Yeah, because like sometimes if I sleep on my, I've tried to sleep on my side and I would just wake up 'cause sometimes I just get cramps. I don't know. - Yeah. - Old man, old man. - Yeah, if I sleep on like in like a weird position where it's like not on a normal side, maybe I'm so tired that I don't fucking care what position I sleep in. Next morning I'm stiff. Like my shoulders are fucking aching and I'm like, oh fuck, all right. - One time I woke up as a kid and my head was like,

so I can imagine, I don't know how to explain it. Like head on the bed and then my like knees, I was like on my knees though. So I was like- - You're like snailing? - Kind of like a snail. Yeah, imagine a snail like that. And I was just like that, my knees on the fucking bed and my legs were kind of like up, I guess. And I was like, what the fuck? - Do you have this problem? 'Cause I constantly have this problem with futons. I wake up and the pillow is nowhere near my head.

- No, I don't have that. - You have this? - No. - You fighting the fucking pillow? - I don't fucking know. Like I'm like, I clearly position myself. - Pillow got hands. - Yeah. I'm like, when I sleep in a futon, I always have to sleep on my back because you know, there's less padding right between you and the floor. So I'm always sleeping on my back. Head is perfectly on the pillow, like supporting my neck. And I'm like, all right, good. I just have to stay in this position. And I'm good till the morning. Wake up the next morning.

I'm somehow on my fucking side, like on the corner of the futon and I'm like, where did the pillow go? And it's like all the way up. - It's just on the ceiling. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just like, if the futon is here, the pillow was like down here. And I'm like, how, what the fuck? How did that happen? - Do you, okay. No matter what state of mind you're in, do you always feel like you need like a kind of like blanket or something covering you to fall asleep? 'Cause yeah, that's something that's like remained true no matter what, even like, even,

during our degenerate days when we went to like house parties and university, of course, sometimes you get inebriated in some stranger's house and I would always need something. Even if it's on the floor, I could sleep fine. I'll find a fucking pizza box, which has no insulation whatsoever, but I've woken up with a pizza box that I've put over myself. - Do you remember one time when we went

- This is years ago. But remember one time when we also used to live near each other, we went to like a house party. I think it was Maylene's place. And I was so fucking like just shit face that you dragged me back to your house and I woke up the next morning with two pieces of cardboard. I actually straight up looked homeless.

Like my hair was just fucked and I'm just like lying on Connor's couch like this with two pieces of fucking like Amazon boxes on me. - I didn't have any, 'cause I literally just moved in. All I had was a couch and a bunch of cardboard boxes. So I piled a bunch of cardboard boxes on top of him to like help him, I guess, because it was like January. - Yeah, I remember this. - I had no heating. - I woke up the next morning

freezing with these like two fucking boxes on me. I'm like, what happened? - No, 'cause I remember- - I totally forgot about that. - I remember the night 'cause I remember taking him home with you 'cause I thought I was like sober. I clearly wasn't sober because I remember I was, we got sitting up to the couch and I remember asking Connor, Connor, do you have any spare blankets? And he just goes,

- No, and then we look around and there are all of the cardboard boxes that Connor has just finished unpacking. And we were just like, we can fashion a blanket out of this. This is fine. This is fine. - Why did you stay in my house and why did I not take you to yours? I don't know why.

- I don't know. We were all drunk. - I think because- - Because we took a taxi and it was your place. And there's a little bit of a walk from yours to mine. And I think you in your drunken state made the right decision of, I don't think he can make it. - Yeah, I was like, just lie on my cardboard box instead.

- Yeah, 'cause I remember thinking, yeah, I don't know Joey's like actual address. And my Japanese wasn't good enough to like direct the taxi driver back and either. So we're like, let's just stay at Connor's. I remember walking out of that house being like, Joey's so drunk. And then I'm a flight, I was like a 10 minute walk from Connor's house. I remember walking like the direction I thought was going to home. I walked for what I thought was five minutes. I'm like, I remember just looking up and being like,

- Where the fuck am I? I look at the clock, I've been walking for 30 minutes and Sydney's like, where the fuck are you? I literally have no idea where I was. And somehow in my drunken stupor, I'd walk in half an hour the wrong direction from my house before I'd realized I was lost. So that was a good night. - That was a good night.

- Yeah, I got my steps in. I got my goddamn steps in. - Well, hopefully you don't have to sleep with cardboard boxes tonight on you. - Yeah, it's not fun. - It was like minus one that day too. - It was cold as shit. - It was a very cold night. - I can say with certainty from experience,

- Doesn't help with the heat. - Really? - It was like 0.1% insulation. - It's like placebo thing. Just having something on top of you helps you. - I did not work. - I'm so confused. - Did not work. Hey, look at these patrons though. - Yeah, look at all those patrons who get a good night's sleep. - Sleep on their sides. - Definitely piss correctly.

- They don't piss in the dark. - Yeah, don't do piss in the face, it's not worth it. But hey, you know what is worth it? Supporting us on Patreon by going to patreon.com/trashtaste. Also follow us on Twitter, send us memes on the subreddit and if you hate our face, listen to us on Spotify. - But yes, that's been this episode of "Trash Taste". Hope you got some good pissing techniques, grooming techniques.

- We gave a lot of shit advice this episode. - What did we talk about this episode? I don't know. - I don't remember. - Sydney's gonna ask me and I'm gonna say, I don't know. - Just bants. Just bants in it. - But we'll see you all next week. - Bye.