Preparing for Change with Cassandra Worthy
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For 25 years, Brightview Senior Living has been dedicated to creating an award-winning company culture so residents and families receive best-in-class services. Across our 50 communities, Brightview associates help deliver peace of mind, safety, security, transportation, daily programs, delicious food, and high-quality care if needed.

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Welcome to the CINO Show. I'm your host, Cino McFarlane. I'm an addiction specialist. I'm a coach. I'm a translator. And I'm God's middleman. My job is to crack hearts and let the light in and help everyone shift the narrative. I want to help you wake up and I want to help you get free. Most importantly, I don't want you to feel alone. Listen to the CINO Show every Wednesday on iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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Listen to Misspelling on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Change is inevitable. We all know that. And so it's kind of funny how many of us fear change knowing that it will happen. That's why I wanted to talk to Cassandra Worthy. She is an expert at change. In fact, that's what she does. She helps companies manage change. She even wrote a book about it called Change Enthusiasm.

And we discussed the single best way to manage change is to actually be completely prepared for it before it happens. So when that inevitable change does happen, it stops being scary and starts being inspiring. This is a bit of optimism. Cassandra Worthy, you have one of the best names in the world. Thank you. Thank you.

That's not the reason I wanted to talk to you today. What I wanted to talk to you about was change, because I know that you've made a study of change your whole life and the way you appreciate and approach change is different than most. Where I want to start is why are people afraid of change? Honestly, I believe there's a fear that's inspired when change hits.

because it is inviting us outside of what we know. It's inviting us outside of that zone of comfort. It is putting us in a place where there are more questions than answers, where there are unknowns. It's a fear of not having all the right answers, seeming to look incompetent.

But all of it is rooted in that fear of how will I be assessed? How am I going to be viewed? And then what is it going to feel like, right? I'm getting outside of something that I know into something that I don't. So why do people fear change when it's for the better? So for example, you're at a job you don't love where every time you're with your colleagues, you fantasize about quitting. You're in a relationship that you don't love. And when you're with your friends, you fantasize about breaking up, of which you do neither of those things until your job lays you off

or your significant other dumps you. And then all of a sudden, the change that you may have even dreamed of now becomes debilitating. I understand when you're on a path and you're happy and like, this is my job and I love my job and this is my relationship and I love my relationship. I understand why fear would creep in there. But why are we afraid of change when it's the thing that we actually sometimes fantasize about?

It's as soon as we get into that unknown, because even though we might be in a situation that we don't like, at least we know it. At least we know the parts we don't like about it. At least there's a certain comfort in being able to anticipate and being able to have that expectation that's often met because we're in a place that we know. When a change occurs, ooh,

we have expectations and we have no idea if it's going to get met. We don't know what's about to happen. And so I think it's that darkness, that unknown, that really is what inspires that fear. And honestly, I'm grateful for it because in fear is energy. In fear,

Fear is resource, is a tool that keeps us alert. And I think that if we can allow that fear to then guide us and form us, and then when we can use it to move us forward, it's all the better. Give me a specific example that captures what you're talking about, something tangible. I'll share a personal example. And really, it's been my journey of sobriety. For many, many years, I convinced myself that I was simply a heavy drinker.

that sometimes may be a problem drinker, but certainly not an alcoholic. Even though both of my parents are in recovery, both of them recovering alcoholics, they, of course, had offered some guidance saying, Cassandra, maybe you also have the alcoholism, the alcoholic gene. And it's like, no, it can't be me. And the reason that I was able to put my trust and belief in not being an alcoholic is because I'd never been arrested for DUI.

And I would go with my parents to AA meetings. It was under the guise of supporting them in their journey. But really, it was to convince myself that I did not have this problem because I'd hear the people in the room. They talk about six, seven DUIs, losing their job, being without a home. It's like, I can't be me. I know that's not me. I'm good. I'm going to celebrate, go to the bar. And then I'd also convince myself that I could go a day without having a drink.

And so if I could not drink for a whole day, then there's no way I could be an alcoholic. The old, I can stop drinking whenever I want. Exactly, exactly. And I would do it. And that whole day I'd think about don't drink and don't drink, don't drink, don't pick it up, don't go to the bar. And then the next day celebration, I'm about to get hammered because I didn't drink yesterday. And so when I got arrested for DUI and this happened going on nine years ago and I was in the back of that squad car, my world came crumbling down. And you talk about crippling fear.

You talk about guilt. You talk about shame. You talk about what does this mean for me? And it was a great, great fear. Fear of what my family would think of me. Fear of what my friends would think of me. Fear of what might happen with my job. And it was in that darkness, that depth, that despair that I heard this whisper. I heard this whisper that told me you are an alcoholic and it's okay.

You are an alcoholic and it's okay. This is a part of who you are.

It is healthier for you and those around you that you abstain, that you abstain from drinking. And it was in sitting in that fear, allowing it to be there, that I think it allowed that voice to come through to be able to awaken me to this world, this life of sobriety. And it was in that clarity that curiosity turned into passion, that my life just expanded to breaches that I never even dreamed.

And I'm so grateful for that arrest. And I'm so grateful for the fear that it inspired, because I believe that it welcomed me into the greatest moment of opportunity I've had in my entire life. And

And I'm grateful that in that opportunity, crippled by fear, I chose to say yes to my alcoholism. And I chose to say yes to sobriety. And of course, you know, it doesn't mean that everything's been sunshine and sunflowers and daisies and all the other happy things since then in the past nine years. But my life has been so much better because of the clarity that sobriety has afforded me.

And I strongly believe that it was because of the fear, the depth of that, that I was able to have that awakening.

Because, I mean, think about it. If I had gotten the arrest and had no fear, had no concern, had no guilt, I would have just kept going. And it had happened to me before with other kind of less major events. But because of the calamity of that, the fear was ever present. So what did you learn from those meetings that prepared you in that moment of fear that it was a singular event that changed your life rather than exhaustion or repeated events that led to change?

Yeah, I think it was a culmination of all the different voices that I heard, the stories that were told. And there's something that stayed with me. They talk about the yet. And when I used to go into the room, I would talk about how I'd never gotten a DUI, never lost my job. Well, in the rooms of AA, those are called my yets. I hadn't gotten a DUI yet.

I hadn't lost my job yet, but that was the path, that was the trajectory that I was on. And so when I had realized having that arrest and I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm hitting a yet. And I'd heard about so many other yets. And if this is the trajectory that I remain on, those yets will become my reality because this is proof right here in this moment. And I think that was maybe one that stayed with me the most.

And I'm so grateful for the first year of sobriety. I continued going to the rooms the first couple of years, sharing my own story and continuing to listen, to listen to those that had been on my path and now choosing to walk sobriety. And I will tell you, it was not only the knowledge that I gleaned within those meeting rooms, but it was also the mindset that I had come to embrace and practice within my corporate life.

going through big acquisition, big change in business. And all of what I now call signal emotions being felt in business and what I did when I felt them moving in my work. And then I'm thinking, this is something that I can apply right now today because I'm feeling fear. I'm

I'm feeling anger. I'm feeling frustration because I want to go drink. I want to go have a drink, but I'm not. So it means yet again, I'm in an opportunity and I have to choose what am I going to do today? And today I'm going to choose not to drink. Let me push back a little bit if I can, right? Yeah, please. One of the magical things about AA is that it's a community and that everybody there knows that it's really, really hard to

beat alcoholism alone, which is why you have a sponsor and which is why you have the community. So you don't feel like you're alone when you do this. And when you say, when facing the fear of change, however you want to define change, does one need first community relationships to feel not alone in that choice?

Can one choose to navigate change alone? I'm going to kind of separate your question a little bit because I think there's two different nuances that are happening. I think that having a sense of community, belonging, relationships surrounded by love is absolutely required when moving through change in a really successful and fulfilling way.

Right. It's a huge help. It was something that I absolutely needed in those early days of sobriety. But when you talk about that moment of choice, when you talk about being able to embrace a change that's happening in your work, being able to embrace the fact that you were just let go and have to find a new job, being able to embrace the fact that you're an alcoholic and the best choice for you is to abstain, that has to happen in you.

It has to happen within you first because it's rooted in that belief. And I think that belief can get inspired by what you might see within community, but it has to happen in you first. And I believe that it happens in you and outside of any level of community.

And oftentimes when people are at that rock bottom and it happened for me, I was sitting alone on the edge of my bed in my bedroom at four o'clock in the morning. And that's when that belief, when that trust happened, I am an alcoholic and it's okay. That happened within me. And that's when I was like, I've made this decision, I'm changing my trajectory. And then I started to seek community and community inspired and helped me moving along that path.

But that inflection point happens within you first. So the choice to affect change, the choice to make the change, as you said, the choice to go through the inflection, the choice to pivot is a choice that you and you alone must make. And then upon making that choice, then navigating all the next steps of that choice,

that requires community. Okay, so I understand it in the road to sobriety. How did that lesson serve you professionally? It served me when going through two of the biggest changes in my professional life, which were acquisitions.

I was a part of two multi-billion dollar acquisitions in corporate. The first acquisition, I was inside of a company that acquired a multi-billion dollar company. The second time I was a part of a larger company, that business that I was in got sold to another company. And it was that second experience, what I just described, that happened in full sobriety.

And it was a time where there were so many unknowns. There was so much uncertainty. The company that I was being integrated within was looking to reduce costs, as folks often do when you go through an acquisition, to lean out. I was executive at that time, so I had a very healthy salary. So I knew that I was a target. And so there was a lot of unknowns, a lot of uncertainty. And I thought that any day I was going to lose my job.

And there was actually an experience that I had with a manager at the time during a budget review who literally told me in two years, I don't see a lot of value in keeping you in my organization.

So that moment, you know, when he's talking to me and I feel my fist balling up underneath the desk and my mouth is going dry and it's that fear, that fear hit again. And that same depth, the stomach dropping, you know, I felt that. And it's like, okay, here is the signal for me yet again. And I am in a moment of opportunity and it's up to me to choose. What do I do? What do I do with this information?

How do I explore this opportunity? How do I make these words that were just said to me work for me as opposed to against me?

And so I started trying to understand, okay, what could be next? I could either work outside of this company, start polishing up my resume and leave, or I could find a role not in this person's organization, but yet still in this company. And so that's what I did because I knew that I had value to bring and I love the work that I did and I love the nature of the work. And so I worked with senior leadership in a different organization over about four months and I actually created a role for myself.

that I ended up transitioning into just about four or five months after that manager told me what he told me. And I will tell you, Simon, to this day, I am so grateful to that man.

I am so grateful because of those words, because of the fear that it inspired and subsequently the opportunity that invited me into, I ended up making a position that I was much better in tune with, that I was more passionate about, that added more value to the business, that I had more fun in, that had more opportunity. And it was also now a learning opportunity and a learning experience that I now get to share with millions all over the world as I

as I bring my mindset change enthusiasm around the world. So I'm so very grateful that that happened. But once again, it was that fear, that stomach dropping, that mouth going dry, that signaled me into another opportunity to choose how I evolve and how I grow. AI might be the most important new computer technology ever. It's storming every industry and literally billions of dollars are being invested. So buckle up.

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For 25 years, Brightview Senior Living has been dedicated to creating an award-winning company culture so residents and families receive best-in-class services. Across our 50 communities, Brightview associates help deliver peace of mind, safety, security, transportation, daily programs, delicious food, and high-quality care if needed.

Discover how our vibrant senior living communities can help you live your best life. Visit brightviewseniorliving.com to learn more. Equal housing opportunity. For decades, the mafia had New York City in a stranglehold, with law enforcement seemingly powerless to intervene. It uses terror to extort people. However, one murder of a crime boss sparked a chain of events that would ultimately dismantle the mob.

It sent the message that we can prosecute these people. Discover how law enforcement and prosecutors took on the mafia and together brought them down. These bosses on the commission had no idea what was coming their way from the federal government. From Wolf Entertainment and iHeartRadio, this is Law & Order Criminal Justice System. The first two episodes drop on August 22nd.

Plus, did you know that you can listen to the episodes as they come out completely ad-free? Don't miss out. Subscribe to the iHeart True Crime Plus channel today. Available exclusively on Apple Podcasts.

That stomach drop is something we've all felt. And it doesn't have to be as dramatic as this company's being acquired and you're going to lose your job. It could just be getting in trouble at work. And that stomach drop of, oh, no, am I going to get fired? Even though no one's talked about it, it's not happening. But the fear that we have, it ignites our imaginations, right? I think we see it all the time, the way we react to that fear.

is sometimes we lash out, which is a self-defense mechanism. We can become defeatist in that fear. And it's very easy to say, when you have that feeling, that stomach drop, take a deep breath, imagine all the scenarios. I mean, is it that easy when somebody faces that stomach drop? What is the step-by-step process on how to manage stomach drop? Which is a horrendous feeling that we've all had.

Yeah, absolutely. I think the most important thing to start when you're in that moment of fear, especially if it's really acute, like what I experienced talking to that manager, is the acknowledgement and recognition that the fear is there.

Right. Because you can't do anything with the energy. You can't do anything with the signal if you're blind to it. That's the pitfall that we fall into when we become that anger, when we do that act out, like you said, because it's a trigger response as opposed to a well thought out response. And so I think when you can initially just recognize, oh,

Ooh, my hair is up on the back of my neck. I don't, my stomach has fallen down. I'm sweating. My fists are balling up. There's fear here. That is the very first step because then it's, you start to kind of separate the emotional energy from that conscious thought. And that's really what can start, you know, the work to happen. And then it's a matter of giving yourself a bit of grace, right? And allowing the emotion to exist. And I will tell you straight up, I suck.

suck at this. I'm terrible at this because I'm a glass half full, optimistic type of individual. And I like to run away from really difficult emotions, which is why I think I fell into this work because I'm the one that needs to learn it more than anyone else. So I like to ignore, run away, suppress those difficult emotions, which is why many years I drank and I used drugs. I'll tell you a personal story. And it's one that I think we can all relate to. It was a breakup.

And it was actually on the heels or actually at the very beginning of that first acquisition. I moved from one city to another, kind of moved across the country with a girlfriend at the time. And this is a girlfriend that I had envisioned a future with. And within three months of moving to this new city where I knew no one, that relationship ended.

It was perhaps one of the lowest points of my life. And instead of feeling the emotion, instead of allowing that emotion to guide me through an opportunity, the opportunity that I saw was to get drunker and more often and to really numb out the feelings and numb out the emotions. And I did that for a while. I did that for several weeks, if not several months.

And for me, that was really how I exemplified that desire to suppress, to ignore the difficulty. It was about numbing out the emotion, numbing out the pain and remaining blind to that depth of despair that I was in. This idea of numbing the emotion, I think, is very interesting. And there's multiple ways to numb, right? In your case and for alcoholics, alcohol is the numbing mechanism, right?

But I think blame is a numbing mechanism. Demonizing is a numbing mechanism. It's amazing how often when our hearts are broken, we love our girlfriend or boyfriend, and then they break up with us. And all of a sudden, they're horrible people, like literally the next day. Or we're happy in our jobs, and then we get let go, or we get in trouble. And literally the next moment, my boss is an asshole. And I think those are numbing mechanisms. The lashing out is a numbing mechanism.

And the problem is that when we act on that numbing mechanism, because let's be honest, it helps us avoid having to deal with pain, rejection, facing our own challenges head on. It's easier to lash out. The problem is, is when we act in a way designed to numb, there will be greater pain inflicted on others and or ourselves.

Absolutely. That's definitely the case for an alcoholic. That's definitely the case for somebody who resorts to violence. That's definitely the case of somebody who demonizes the boss, the ex. You become a toxic entity. Then those toxic entities who are in this numbing phase, they find each other and they numb together. Now we find belonging in the numbness and now the numbness becomes a callous entity.

It becomes permanent where we feel better about ourselves, but we're actually doing no healing and affecting no change.

Yeah. And I will say the greatest detriment is to ourselves. And honestly, in experiencing this for myself and now seeing this with individuals around the world, I now carry this firm belief that your growth potential, your potential to grow, to learn, to evolve, to expand in this life is determined by what happens at that intersection of change and emotion.

When the emotion hits and you're going through change, what do you do? What are your actions? What are your choices that determines your potential to grow and to learn? So, I mean, based on your own story and based on how we've been talking about this, I actually think that the work has to be done long before the change happens. And I cannot help but go back to the fact that you went to those AA meetings and

you know, over and over again with your parents that you had done much of the work necessary. So at the moment of inflection, at the moment of change, you were prepared. But you hear this from soldiers and Marines and sailors and airmen, which is they'll talk about how, you know, we practice and practice and practice and practice. And then the training just kicks in is what they always say. The training kicks in.

What I want to go into, which is what is the pre-work that we can do? What advice do you offer that we can all do that prepares us for the inevitable?

stomach drop that will happen absolutely professionally and personally many times in our lives. So a couple things as you think about preparedness, as you think about having a mindset of change readiness. So no matter when it comes, you're ready for it. I think the first is about having a rigorous practice of self-awareness, notably as it relates to your emotional energy.

And this happens in all aspects of life. Recognize and be able to name your emotional energy when you feel them. So when you're feeling fear, when you're feeling frustration, when you're feeling anger, being able to recognize, okay, I'm in a moment of anger. I know it because of these things that happen in my body. I know it because this is where my mind is beginning to go. I know it because this is what I want to do. So having that self-awareness, whether that be your physiological cues,

or the things that you tend to do, those actions that you take when that emotional energy is present. And I often invite people to do what I call an emotional inventory, where you're literally writing down, taking an account of the emotions that you experienced throughout the day. And what inspired those emotions? And what did you do with that emotion? And it's going to enable you to start being able to recognize in black and white, ooh, you know what? I get angry a lot.

And these are kind of the three and four things that inspire anger in me all the time. And then you get that curiosity and trying to evolve it and understand yourself. So that self-awareness I think is really important because emotions when going through change are inevitable, especially those really difficult ones that have that stomach dropping type of feeling. And the recognition that there's more than happy, sad, angry. Correct. Somebody gave me an emotion wheel.

which is literally like this, you know, as it sounds, like a color wheel filled with the names of different emotions and then the subsets of those emotions. So it has sort of like the happy, sad, angry on the outside, but that anger has many flavors. Yes.

Am I wronged? Am I frustrated? Am I powerless? And the ability to name the emotion that I'm feeling and to you said this, which is to understand the physiological responses, like my breathing is getting tight. My muscles are tightening up. How do you feel? I feel tight in my chest. I feel tight in my shoulders. I feel frustrated. I feel out of control is better than I'm angry.

Correct. So part of the practice, the preparation for stomach drop is going on this journey of learning to understand one's own emotions, putting words to those feelings and understand the physiological responses. Okay, got it. What's another one? Another one is what I call building your muscle memory.

And this is as it relates to going through really difficult things, including change and disruption. In lay terms, this is about getting outside of your comfort zone, not waiting for change to hit to invite you into it, but rather you intentionally finding ways to stretch yourself like you've never been stretched before.

Because when you can do that and sit in that moment of discomfort, experience that thing that you're not talented at, you have no gift in, but you're going to try it. It's uncomfortable and I look stupid. I know that I do, but I'm going to try it. You're building that muscle memory so that when change hits, when you're in a new role, when you get a new manager, when you're

entering a new industry, when you're doing different work and you feel, oh, I'm not good at this, I feel stupid, the muscle memory will kick in. I can move through this. I felt this before and I didn't die. And I actually learned and grew because of it. So the more often that you can get yourself outside of that zone of comfort, I think the better prepared you'll be when you're forced outside of it.

instigating change to prepare for the unexpected change. The inevitable, the inevitable change. So does that mean that I should keep quitting my job so that I'm prepared for when I get fired? So you could do that, but I'm not going to advise it. I'm going to say no to that one.

For 25 years, Brightview Senior Living has been dedicated to creating an award-winning company culture so residents and families receive best-in-class services. Across our 50 communities, Brightview associates help deliver peace of mind, safety, security, transportation, daily programs, delicious food, and high-quality care if needed.

Discover how our vibrant senior living communities can help you live your best life. Visit brightviewseniorliving.com to learn more. Equal housing opportunity. For decades, the mafia had New York City in a stranglehold, with law enforcement seemingly powerless to intervene. It uses terror to extort people. However, one murder of a crime boss sparked a chain of events that would ultimately dismantle the mob.

It sent the message that we can prosecute these people. Discover how law enforcement and prosecutors took on the mafia and together brought them down. These bosses on the commission had no idea what was coming their way from the federal government. From Wolf Entertainment and iHeartRadio, this is Law & Order Criminal Justice System. The first two episodes drop on August 22nd.

Plus, did you know that you can listen to the episodes as they come out completely ad-free? Don't miss out. Subscribe to the iHeart True Crime Plus channel today. Available exclusively on Apple Podcasts.

Welcome to the CINO Show. I'm your host, CINO McFarlane. I'm an addiction specialist. I'm a coach. I'm a translator. And I'm God's middleman. My job is to crack hearts and let the light in and help everyone shift the narrative. Whether your get down is sex, drugs, alcohol, love addiction, self-hate, codependency, or anything else for that matter.

I want to help you wake up and I want to help you get free. I want to help you unleash your potential, overcome obstacles, and achieve your goals. Most importantly, I don't want you to feel alone. So join me on The Cino Show, where each week we'll feature a compelling individual with an even more noteworthy story that will be sure to inspire and educate. Listen to The Cino Show every Wednesday on iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Give me a real life example of what instigating change looks like. Yeah, for sure. So I was working in a manufacturing facility for some time. And when I first got into the role and I left research and development to go into manufacturing, when I first got into the role, there was so much that I didn't know.

So much that certainly was uncomfortable. And then over the weeks and the months being in the role, I got a level of comfort. I got my legs under me and understood what I needed to do and started doing the role well. But I still wanted to have that feeling of discomfort. So I would find ways to learn something that I wasn't necessarily responsible for, but that would stretch me in a way that I wasn't being stretched.

So whether that be looking at different trainings, whether that be listening to different podcasts, whether that be joining groups that I hadn't been in before, something that was unfamiliar, unknown that I hadn't been involved in before.

And you can do that, whether that be at work, whether that be shadowing somebody in a role that you might be interested in, whether that be finding that training that has nothing to do with what your role is, but you maybe just have a curiosity and find those things that you're not gifted at, that you've maybe had a curiosity for, maybe a hesitation, maybe a little bit of fear in trying. Try it, do it, stretch yourself and build that muscle memory. What I really like about this practice is,

to be very open and honest about why you're doing it, which is to be uncomfortable. Because I think very often we don't do these things because we like to be instant experts. Nobody likes to feel stupid, feel dumb, feel like you can't do something. And I think to say out loud, I am doing this because I don't know how to do it. Because very often I think we show up and we sort of lying, hiding and faking a little bit. And so I think to do it with the express purpose, which is I'm here to be the idiot.

Right. I'm here to be the dumb one. I'm here to be the least experienced person because I like putting myself in a situation where I am uncomfortable. I am inexperienced. I am the idiot so that I can build the muscle. It invites you to practice vulnerability as well.

especially when you're doing something that's in a group, that's in a team where people can actually see you fall down, where people can see you make mistakes. You have to be able to operate in the space of vulnerability, which I think is a prized skill that I think more and more leaders are going to need to use as our world becomes more uncertain and more volatile. And I will tell you the most important ingredient to being able to embrace the opportunity is to trust that it's there.

to trust that it's there. And I've been able to link the inspiration of those more difficult emotions like the fear, the humiliation, the sadness, the grief, the frustration to be the signal for an opportunity. And you just have to trust that it exists

exists and then choose to explore it. What is here for me to learn? How can I show up and admit that I've made a mistake, admit that I don't know what I'm doing, but you know what? I'm here to learn and I'm here to be better because of it. And you know what? I'm here to talk about my mistake because I don't

I want you to make the same mistake. And I'm going to go on a video and I'm going to talk about this foolishness that I did to save you from doing it as well. When you do that choice, when you maximize that opportunity, not only will you accelerate your own learning, your own expansion, but you'll inspire the learning and growth of those around you.

You're so right. And I think one of the things that I think older generations don't do a good job of is we keep telling young people what we got right and how to do things so that you can have success too. But we rarely talk about what we got wrong or where things really took a turn for the worse.

so that people who are earlier in their careers can recognize that we make lots of wrong decisions. And I think it's very important for successful people or people who have at least been in the workplace a little longer or in relationships. I mean, it doesn't matter. Anybody who's been doing, I don't even think it's about success. Just people who've been doing something for a while.

to talk about not what they got right, but what they got wrong, I think is way more helpful for younger generations so that when the inevitable does go wrong, they feel normal rather than humiliated. Yeah, and it invites this connection too, right? An authentic connection that I think is fueled in the emotion, right?

Right. Because when you're talking about a failure or a mistake, you're probably revisiting that moment. And again, there's that vulnerability. And again, that's there's that fear, that frustration, that anger that you felt and that perhaps people in your audience, the person you're talking to is feeling in that moment. And then that creates this bond, this connection. Oh, they felt that way, too.

So have I. And then it's like you create that connection to empower and to engage. So let me summarize what I've learned, which I'm really grateful for, which is change is inevitable. Fear of change is inevitable. The stomach drop is inevitable. And every single one of us has the opportunity to prepare for that change.

And there are two simple things we can do. One is understand our feelings, label those feelings, understand the physiological reactions we have when we have our feelings so that we know what we're feeling when we have those feelings. That's really important. And number two, to preempt change by creating opportunities for change and discomfort so that we're more familiar and more prepared for it when it happens.

And that doesn't mean we have to do big things. We don't have to create dramatic change. You don't have to quit a job to be prepared for when you get fired. But to put yourself in a position where you're not the expert, to put yourself in a situation where you are the idiot, to put yourself in a situation where you have to walk in the room saying, I just want everybody to know I have no idea what I'm doing and that's why I'm here, is the best way to prepare ourselves when change is thrust upon us. Cassandra Worthy.

Thank you so, so much. I really enjoyed this. Thanks for being a part of it. It's been a pleasure. Thank you so much for having me. If you enjoyed this podcast and would like to hear more, please subscribe wherever you like to listen to podcasts. And if you'd like even more optimism, check out my website, simonsenic.com for classes, videos, and more. Until then, take care of yourself. Take care of each other.

For 25 years, Brightview Senior Living has been dedicated to creating an award-winning company culture so residents and families receive best-in-class services. Across our 50 communities, Brightview associates help deliver peace of mind, safety, security, transportation, daily programs, delicious food, and high-quality care if needed.

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Sometimes chaotic life in marriage. I just filed for divorce. Whoa. I said the words that I've said like in my head for like 16 years. Wild. Listen to Miss Spelling on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Welcome to the CINO Show. I'm your host, Cino McFarlane. I'm an addiction specialist. I'm a coach. I'm a translator. And I'm God's middleman. My job is to crack hearts and let the light in and help everyone shift the narrative. I want to help you wake up and I want to help you get free. Most importantly, I don't want you to feel alone. Listen to the CINO Show every Wednesday on iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.