The Benefits Of Being With Rose Cousins
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Good day, everyone. It's the Jan Arden Podcast and Show. And we have an excellent guest here today, so don't go away. Are you in your minivan? Hi, I just wrote that song on the spot. Welcome Rose Cousins, one of my favorite, never mind Canadian singer-songwriters, one of my favorite singer-songwriters. And I...

discovered Rose, myself personally. I know the world had discovered her, but oh, this is going back several years. I did a little show, let's say it's on another network, on the CBC called Being Jan. And I played a lot of Canadian music. And I went into the Google and I went new Canadian singer songwriters. And Rose came up.

And she blew my mind off my head. I was a little bit jealous. Rose is with us today. I've talked her into this. I sent you a check, Rose. It's coming your way. And I sent you some coupons so that Rose could join us here on the show. Hi, Rose. Well, hi. No, I love a coupon. And I definitely would never do this without a check. No. Rose has been one of my...

My soldiers, one of my COVID warrior women, girlfriends. And I just want to say on a personal note, I don't think I would have made it through the last 15 months without you, without our constant conversations. We do something called boxing and it's an app and it's kind of like walkie talkies.

We are not sponsored by the Vox people, although if they'd like to sponsor us. Yeah, no, likewise. Our daily correspondence is something that I look forward to. It's kind of like an anchor. I love it when I'm crawling into bed at night and I've got like six Voxers to listen to.

And you just hit the little arrow. And it's just, I think it's what counselors or therapists should use as a tool for people going through divorces or separations or trying to repair relationships because you just talk once at a time. I think they should put people in separate rooms, give them the Vox app. Then you can say what you're saying and then the other person can say what they're saying. Right. Those are who are interrupters. Yeah.

Or in dramatic situations. Yeah. Or it's like an on-call therapist. That probably...

Maybe you and I should become, that could be the next thing that we do is we can become quick on-call therapists through Voxer. Voxer will of course sponsor us. And then like, if someone needs like just a bit quick advice, it's not a big deal. We Vox them. It's six, six, 700 bucks a Voxer. It's no bigs, you know, e-transfer PayPal, whatever. No problem. Well, of course we take Bitcoin. What kind of a question is that? Yeah.

Well, of course you should wear pants on a first get-together, you silly goose. I don't know if we would agree on that, so we might be given different advice. Yeah, you did something outrageous during this pandemic. And I don't mean baked bread. You freaking bought... No, I actually didn't. You sold your house. You sold your house, and you bought a new house, and you moved during a pandemic. What possessed you, Rose? What?

Well, the last time I had a gap of time, I've kind of just like, I was at my previous place for 12 years and I kind of like the only, as you know, we only get like very rarely would you ever even get a month off at home to kind of deal with, you know, domestic type things. But I kind of had a, like right before I launched, I got ready to make my last record, my two records ago, Natural Conclusion. I had this kind of like mini gap of time and I was like,

I knew that house wasn't going to be my forever house. And I was like, maybe I'll try and send it. So I tried to sell it in 2015. Didn't work. And then when things opened up, like just, I got to the end of the summer last year and I'm just like, you know what? Nothing's happening anytime soon. Here's a gap of time and the market's ballistic. So maybe I should get it on it. And then it just, I do feel like the universe just kind of like took my hand through it, even though it was like, you know, moving is just crazy.

It's like so stressful. Yes, it is. But anyways, it worked out. I had the space and time to be able to just focus entirely on that. I can't imagine doing it if I was still touring and stuff. I can't even imagine. You would never have done it. You would never have done it. No. So I'm so thankful. Yeah, to kind of like, I just kind of did a system upgrade. I think it feels so good to...

to reinvent the walls around you sometimes. I did that for many years when I was your age. I just, there was about a 10, 22. Yes. 22. But there was a decade or so stretch there where I was, let's call it home hopping.

Like every couple of years. And yeah, I know nothing about real estate. I'm just going to say that right now. I'm not a mogul. I don't know how to, I don't know what something, I mean, I can look at a house and go, Oh, that, that must be worth about $325,000. And people are like, no, that's 8.3 million. What? I have no sense of it, but I did really well.

for that like 12, 14 years from going house to house. And of course, in this country, you get to like keep your, the equity you built up and you don't pay taxes on it. As far as I know, maybe I'm saying something where someone's going to knock on my door and demand money. Don't get into the finances. I don't know nothing about it. Well, anyway. And so I just would dump every little bit that I made. Hey, listen, on the first house I sold in 1993 or 2004,

I made $7,500, Rose. Okay. And what did you do with that? I put it right into my next home. That's right. That's what you do. And then I just sort of went up from there and I just kept moving, moving until the place that I'm in now that I really love. And I only have 70 years of payments left. Yeah. I'm thinking I've got just under 70. I cried the first month I got in here because-

I was so in debt and my contingency plan needed a contingency plan. And I'm just like, how do you even get your head around this? And I thought as I had tears rolling down the side of my face lying in bed and I could hear, feel the tear going into my ears and making that, that sound where you've just,

You're swimming underwater and I'm really feeling sorry for myself. And I thought, well, I really learned a lot building the house and I can just sell it and I can find something like in the mean. And anyway, that was me. That's a contingency plan is to sell it. You can't live in it. You can't afford it. You got to sell it. Well, you and I have had this conversation, right? It's like, well, if it all goes sideways, I'll just, I'll put it up for sale.

And, you know, that's how it goes. Listen, I bought this little condo. Oh, you're in debt now, Jen. Why not go into a little more debt and get yourself a condo in Toronto? Because I was so sick of hotels. You know that. You travel more than I do, Rose. I don't know if that's true. Yeah. You're always in Europe and you're always, I remember you going to Europe a couple of years ago before the new world happened and

And you flew over there. You did a bunch of gigs. And I think you were home for a week and you flew back. Do you remember that? So stupid. It wasn't stupid. It wasn't stupid. Anyway, people don't understand. Yeah, we're both very lucky to have. I feel very lucky to have found this home. I ended up actually buying it from friends. I just happened to be looking at a house nearby. It was just a beautiful serendipitous thing that

um you know and with it comes lots of like you're saying like you built a house I bought a house you don't really know anything about it until it reveals itself to you like yep carpenter ants and windows needing to be replaced and you know it'll be interesting to go through I've just survived winter in it you know um but I know I feel really thankful and I wouldn't have done it if the pandemic hadn't been here there's so many things that I

that it has the gift of being home has given me, including getting a dog. I was just, get out of my brain. Stop. Okay. Sorry. Saying the other pandemic thing that you did, you got a dog and he came, Harrington came from, he had to fly to you, but he had to wait to be a certain age. And he got on the plane and he has really transformed you Rose. Like there was so much apprehension before you got them. And like,

You know, what do you do with a dog? How do you, with a puppy especially? And they tell you what to do, don't they? Well, the internet tells you what to do. Yeah, the puppy, you're right, you're right. It's been a year of learning in departments that I've dreamed of and never thought I'd

you know, I thought it would be years down the road, years down the road that I'd be able to actually move or years down the road until I'd be able to be stable enough to have a dog. You know, why do people live that way? Why do we do that to ourselves? When my real life starts, when I, when I've traveled this much, when I put my next record out, when, when, you know, I'm, I'm in a new home, then I'll do this. Then I'll do this. Then I'll get the dog. Then I'll, I don't know why we do that to ourselves. If this has taught us anything, the moment is all, this is it.

Yeah. I mean, like, that's what we could talk that we could talk the rest of the time about, about that. I'm the contemplation and the time to, to, to think which has created, you know, vortexes of darkness, but also like, man, you know, there's probably so many times that I've been like, okay, if I had, if I had limitless time, what would I do? And now I'm in this closest to limitless time that I've been in and I'm here. I mean, I'm like,

I'm calling the question on myself and being like, what am I made of? Like, what am I made of when I'm handed the thing I've talked about having or can you hear him? It's usually MIDI like Adam and I it's very live. Yeah. You know, he's, we've always got the dog or Adam. He's a child. One of his daughters opens the door. Hi dad. Can I have your phone on sweetheart? Not, not right now. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Listen, but anyway, do we have to stop and do another section or are we allowed? You know, you, you, you get out of my mind. Stop controlling the show. You're listening to the Jen Arden podcast show. I just saw Adam wave. Yes. Variety hour. Adam will do a lot of signaling. Don't go away. Rose cousins is our special guest. Adam Karsh is here with me. We'll be right back. We're going to talk about a whole bunch of things that will be riveting. We'll be right back.

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Welcome back to the Jan Arden Podcast. I'm here with one of the best singer-songwriters on the planet, Rose Cousins. She originates from Prince Edward Island. Her family is there. She has seen her family, I would say, a couple of times in the last 15 months, but she's

I think that's been a difficult thing is to not be able to zoom across that peace bridge and just see your parents that are, let's face it, they're not getting any younger. You've got a lot of siblings, you've got nieces and nephews. And I would imagine that's been fairly frustrating to like realize you can't just hop in your family size sedan and

And drive over there to see them. Yeah, it's, it is definitely a source of frustration. And it's like, you know, it's like that balance between those days where you're just like, I'm just low or sad or mad that I can't, you know, I live in Halifax, Nova Scotia, it's three hours away from the majority of my family.

And I, as you know, the deep loyalty to PEI and my family will go once a month to PEI. I want to be there for the birthdays. I want to be there for the occasions and, and I'm so close and yeah, it is frustrating. And especially like when you have nieces and nephews, it's like, they're just like these growing, growing, they're growing so quickly and I feel like I'm missing out on things, but yeah,

There are people who have people who are across the world and have been able to see them like, you know, maybe that's a the equalizer of like that I do have a couple of friends that I can see in town and my chosen family and and and there are ways to communicate.

So not all is lost, but it's definitely, it's an internal adjustment. That's probably the hardest one. Like a lot of my good friends and yourself included don't live in the same place that I do. No. And, and thank God for technology because it's, it's been, uh,

I mean, why I didn't buy into Zoom a couple years ago before I knew about it. Oh, geez, right? No, we shouldn't. No, we shouldn't. But it's been telling people all these years, well, you can't work from home. We can't have a three-day work week here in the office and work from... It's never going to work. And now the entire world is like, Adam always says to me, I don't care if I ever go back to the office. I'm so happy to see my girls, to see...

you know, my home, my wife, you know, the day-to-day stuff, but

We're going to get back to it. It's been really weird. I don't know how you guys feel about this. Watching the United States open up this last couple of weeks, especially Biden made an announcement this week that people that are fully vaccinated, meaning that if you've had your two shots of whatever the vaccine that you got, that you don't necessarily have to wear masks. I mean, of course, businesses still have the right to say, listen, if you're going to be in my little store, I'm not vaccinated completely. Please.

please wear your mask. So there's a lot of confusion in the States right now, people reevaluating those rules, but you know, we're sitting up here. I know you guys are locked down. We're locked down here. You can't go to a gym hair salon. It's I,

I have to say I'm a bit jealous and maybe I'm prematurely jealous because who knows what that's going to look like a month from now. Are their numbers going to skyrocket? Like what? I definitely have mixed feelings about watching it happen, even though I'm glad that the States is ahead of us in vaccinations and lots of like, it's comforting to, you know, to know that all of my friends in the States are vaccinated. And I congratulate them on being ahead of,

considering they've had a recent history of kind of pure hell. But there's something about for me here and for you there, like we can't really, there's nothing you can't like,

you know, all of this stuff we're trying to, even if you tried to throw an anchor out, it would, it would just land in sand at this point. That's how I feel. It's like planning is not planning is something that you and I historically have been anchored in. And I mean, you've been so active. You, you've been so unbelievable. You've worked your,

nuts off during this this whole year well it's because I don't have my period anymore Rose I don't have my period anymore and you're not spelled right off and I just got extra time because I was having my period three weeks out of every month there for oh was it a decade that's cumbersome I don't know it's just like oh my god I've got all this time and I thought why not do a tv show and another record

Oh my God. No, honestly, you're absolutely my hero. I just like, I'm amazed at how much you've gotten done. And I wouldn't compare this year of mine to yours because I feel like I definitely have been lost for the majority of it. And some days it's been like, yeah, like, okay, I'm going to relinquish now. Now,

Now it's May again. This May feels like last May because we were locked down and this was the time. It's just like a little bit, it's weird that it's nostalgic, this feeling of like, we're still locked down, except we actually had some privilege in between. So we did really well here in the Atlantic coast.

And it's like, right, well, someone's asking me about something about August. Someone's asking me in the States about something about September. And I'm like, are you going to be in Nashville in September? Like, well, I literally couldn't even begin to contemplate whether I would be able to be in Nashville in September. Well, we don't know if we can fly out. We don't know what, we just don't know what the domestic flight,

flying. Well, I think people, the thing that I understand is that people are moving around. People haven't stopped moving around the world. So I know that it's possible, but now for me, it's like, it's like, do I want to go to this thing and have to isolate for two weeks when I come back? What do I, is it worth, you know, because that's what's happening here. When is that going to go away? When does it matter if you have one vaccine versus the two? Like what, I don't know how we're supposed to move in the world. And so planning is,

Is this, it's maybe it's still futile here. And I am, I'm not sure how I'm, I'm hoping that everything, I'm hoping that the opening of the States doesn't make things worse, but I mean, who knows? I literally, I'm a person who loves control and I have feel like I have zero control at this point. I know for, for people that do like to be in control, this has been the ultimate test for your type of personality. I don't need to be in control.

I am so Aries. I'm like head through wall. You're now stuck in the wall. Your head's on the other side. You've got drywall everywhere. Someone now is slapping your butt, you know, and you're like, why did I do that again? Like, it seems like such a great idea.

What sign are you? I don't know a lot about... I'm Taurus. I'm right after you. I'm Taurus. I'm an Aries Taurus cusp. So I'm just, I'm the very beginning of Taurus, but I definitely have a lot of Taurus. Taurus control is one of those things. But you know what's interesting about Taurus? That is that they are homebodies. And I think that side of me is...

That side of me that doesn't like historically hasn't kind of like given up that the actual like regularity of routine and that kind of thing like I am. It is exciting to me to make my own coffee in the morning and it is like a very anchoring thing to walk the dog and to actually like I know this sounds stupid but it's one of the things that I often think about when I was on the road for so long was just like I just want to be able to pick my toothbrush up out of a toothbrush cup.

And the toothpaste out of the toothbrush cup and just like take it from on the shelf and then just brush my teeth and just put it back there as opposed to like rummaging around in a cosmetic case to find a shit. It's yeah. It's so much better than the one that, you know, is either in the bottom of your purse or suitcase. And there's a piece of an M and M on it and a chunk of hair. And you're just like, and maybe a copper penny stuck to the handle. And you're like, I gonna, I'm going to brush my teeth. I'm going to use my teeth. I'm going to use it. I'm going to use it.

I'm going to rinse it off. I'm going to get this water as hot as I can get it. And then I'm going to brush my teeth. I'm going to use one of these wet wipes. Do you in earnest miss touring? Like if you're like right now, this in this moment, can you say to me, Jan? Oh, I just touring. I miss every moment of it. No. Okay. I don't. Wow.

No, I don't. But also, when I say that, I think that I have had little moments. Starting in January, I've had little flashes of nostalgia for it, like in things that I miss about it. But I was thinking, you know, why? And I really toured for 15 years without taking any time off. And so now I feel like I'm taking all of the vacations that I never took, even though it's not...

it's not a vacation, but it's like, now I'm taking a year that I would never have gifted myself to like be a person that lives in a place. Like I ordered a push mower, like one of those Lee Valley hand mow that doesn't, I just have to push. It just has blades. And I was like, I'm looking at my lawn. I've never had a lawn and I'm looking at it and I'm like,

okay, no, I can't be the neighbor that looks like they're like, I kind of want to let it go to pasture and just be like, whatever. But I'm like, I need a shin. So, you know, I go on Lee Valley and I'm going to go pick it up after this. And I got to like cut the lawn. I've never like, there's garden beds here from the people who were here before. I've always talked about like, wouldn't it be cool to like plant a vegetable? I mean, I grew up on a farm, but I haven't, I haven't had

You know, so the deep privilege I feel of being in one place and experience. I'm going to cut you off now. Adam, take note. We're right in the middle of the word experience. We're going to pick up from there. We're coming right back. Rose Cousins is here. She's going to talk to us about her push mower. We'll be right back. Me and my profile. We can do anything together. We're not scared. We all shine.

Welcome back. Rose Cousins was in the middle of the word experience. Go. Oh, I was just talking about how like in the last 15 years, I haven't actually experienced like domestic life, like living in a place, having groceries that are perishable in the fridge and eating them before they perish. You know, yeah. Making coffee in the morning, brushing my teeth at night, just doing like regular repetitive things. Yeah.

It sounds stupid, but it feels like a new experience to me. It doesn't. It is an absolutely new experience. There's a blue jay at my bird feeder right now. My friend Dawn Brownrigg, who you have met, got me this bird feeder. And I'm like, I never had a place to put a bird feeder. And now there's a blue jay throwing all of the seeds out over the sides. The bird feeders don't work in the bunks. They just don't work in the bunks on the bus. Yeah.

On the bus, yeah. Anyway, it's like all the... I have plants. I have 12...

living plants. This seems so stupid, but like, it's just insane. I don't ever, and I didn't buy a single one of them. I've just been gifted these plants in the last year. And I'm like, every time someone has handed me a plant, I'm just kind of like, I had the greatest look of fear in my life. And they're like, don't worry. It's going to be fine. Just water it every now and again. And now I have a window to put them in. Like my last place didn't have sun pouring in. And then there's sometimes in the day when there's

There's sun that comes in. So it's like sun, garden, lawn, doing things for a house, being a person that lives in a place. It's just, it's completely kind of 180 to what my life was before. And so I just feel so thankful to have this time. I don't know whether it'll ever go back to the way that it was. And I definitely miss the discourse of,

with an audience. I miss instigating a connection and I miss the camaraderie and the connection on stage. I miss seeing you in person, like, you know, where we're just like, when are you going to be in Toronto? When are you going to be there? Are you going to see you in the Calgary airport? I'm going to, you know, I miss that, but like, I don't miss right now the speed at which I was attempting to, that I very successfully kept up. Well, I remember you packing. Yeah.

You know, you have two suitcases, two guitars, and then you were taking your merch with you, Rose. Yeah.

you were like a one man army. You were like, you know, I've got to pack my t-shirts and my, you were taking some vinyl or like whatever you were taking with you because you're running a business essentially. Yeah. And I think sometimes people picture touring as this, where these eternal junior high school kids that are on this road trip that's

Chips and pop and stopping at gas stations and having fun. And it really is so arduous and it's so not for the faint of heart.

No. And, and yeah, I learned that I can do it. And then maybe this you, I mean, you, you keep a pace. I mean, you're going to say this about me, but like, I just deeply admired the pace at which you keep it. Like you, you push yourself and you learn, you learn what your limits are. You're like, yes, I can physically do that. I can physically get from this place to this place in this amount of time. And maybe that used to be how you'd make the decision as to whether you do it.

um, like with something needs to get done, no problem. We can get it done. You need this, no problem. But when that urgency isn't here, it's really calling a different question. And I haven't figured out the answer to it yet, but I do feel like I'm coming, coming around. Like I've been trying to settle into this house for the last three months, um, just to figure out where, like I have, I still don't have a place to hang my clothes, but like

but now i'm a treadmill do you have a treadmill because there's a bar across a treadmill oh my god i didn't even think a coat hanger yes oh my god listen i jesus i should have gone on the hacks i should have typed in hanger hacks and the treadmill would have come up and i do got a treadmill and you know i got that treadmill there don't use it but got it yes you do you you you work out a lot

I actually did some Instagram planking with you a couple of weeks back. Rose has historically done something called plankuary. A lot of people have a dry January Rose. Oh, she's completely drunk, but she does plank. No, I'm kidding. I do drink. No, you're not much of a drinker at all. But so what was, what was this was we planked in April. So it was called plank roll, plank roll, plank roll.

Yeah, I think I did it. Yeah, I did it. And I was in motion for, I tried to do it in January. I find that if I break things up into segments of time, then I feel like I can accomplish it. Like right now I'm doing a 21 day movement challenge with this woman who's a fitness influencer out here and it's Kayla Davis, Kay Davis fitness. And I, she, she got me into it again at the end of last year, she was my trainer for a

just online. I've actually never met her in person. And she just did like a two week thing. And I'm like, and she just tagged me in it. And I was like, yeah, I can do two weeks. And then she did another two weeks and I was like, yes, I can keep going. And then she did a month and I did that. And it really, it's,

got me out of a, I find it really hard to maintain working out in the winter. I think everybody does. Yeah. The planking is a way to keep myself doing something that I make sure that I do every day that helps me physically. But also I was in last year, I was doing it with, with friends. And now this year, because I was, you know, I'm home. I just did it at the same time every day on, um,

Instagram live. So, and then whoever wanted to plank with me, I would just, they just send a request and then you just come in. Yeah. I was wondering on the Instagram lives, if you were just randomly choosing somebody. Cause I used to, I tried to really go on and watch them and, and then I'd see you come on and you're like, hi, I'm Dorothy. Well, hi, Dorothy Rose. Welcome to, you know, prank or plank role.

And I'm just like, oh my God, she has no idea who this person is. Yeah. And then you guys would do an interview while planking, like trying to keep your abs in a stationary position. It's almost like having a very long bowel movement. Anyone that's ever done planking, if you want to like talk while you're planking, you literally sound like you're pushing out a poo. Well, this one time I was on, I was on mode and I really love your music. And yeah,

Oh, it was really fun. It was really fun. Um, yeah, some friends, some, sometimes it was a friend, a couple of people asked if they could plank with me. And then you and I were just in a conversation one morning and I was like, I need to plank in 15 minutes. Do you want to plank with me? So it was really fun. It's a fun way to interact, um, and kind of feel connected. Like there's people from kind of all over in the States or in Europe and, um,

across Canada. It was definitely a fun way to love it. Fans without, you know, feeling like I needed to be releasing a song. And I love that you did that. I think the way we've utilized social media and interacted with friends, fans, families has been,

has been so unique. People have been so inventive. I remember watching this thing, like you were talking about May of last year and kind of we're in the same spot again. We've been locked down again. But I remember around this time last year is when you started seeing all these innovative songs coming on the internet. Like people were, somebody would be in New York and another person would be in like, you know, Vancouver Island and they would do this duet. Yeah.

that sounded so beautiful from their kitchen. Then I started seeing choirs with like a hundred people singing these complicated choral pieces with these hundred little faces peeled onto the screen. But I, yeah, I've, I've really, I have enjoyed the internet probably more than I ever have in my life just because of how people have utilized it. Just a bit of a change in gears. What,

What do you think is the most surprising thing you've learned about yourself, Rose, in the past year? Like whether it's something to do with your house or your dog, like something you just didn't expect. I know there's a few things. One of the main things was like, I put this record out last year called bravado. It's beautiful. Yeah.

Thank you. One of the things that always happens to me is that I release a record and then I live the record. Even though seemingly I would have lived the experience as an oral believer, I often find that I will live the record. So I called the question of how I employ bravado in my life. But this time last year, I really...

I felt like each morning I would walk up into my house and all of a sudden I was like, why are there more mirrors here every day? Why am I being forced to look at myself more and more and more? And it was so uncomfortable. It was so uncomfortable in this new way of just like, right, well, the perpetual motion that I've kept myself in for 15 years has kept at bay some of the real work I need to do on myself. Do you think COVID has accelerated that work?

I think it's, I think I've been forced to look at it. I think I'm still deep within it to be honest. Yeah. My guest today and right now, and she's still staying with us. You're not going to go away, right? You're going to come back. Rose Cousins. Bravado is the record. Rose Cousins.

Fingers crossed. And it's going to re-release that album and be working it, you know, properly and hopefully touring it. Cause it's, it's right when it came out, all this stuff hit. It's your best work and your, all your work is impeccable. But this album in particular, we'll talk about that when we come back. Cause I do want to talk about music. Rose Cousins is with us. Don't go away. You come to town. I'll take you in. We'll spend the night. Beautiful sin. Oh, I'm not just dead.

Welcome back. Jen Arden Variety Hour show, podcast, and instructive life therapeutic coaching. I don't know. I can't, yeah, can't even do it. Music, the career of music that you have chosen is not your typical story. You were not

the 15 year old in your parents' basement that suddenly thought, this is it, I'm going to do it. Can you talk a little bit about a decision that as far as I'm concerned, came a little later in life for a person to stop the career that they were in and just go into music and what that leap of faith felt like and what was the catalyst that kind of pushed you finally forward? Yeah.

Well, I mean, music always has always been my closest companion. And really, you know, I put this probably hasn't happened to anyone else. But I grew up in a household where we didn't talk about feelings in any way. So I played my feelings into the piano. You know, starting very young, I took a few lessons, but kind of railed against them, because I had a very strong ear. And I just would get my mom to play the song before lessons. And then I would just go and play the song. And

But I was, I, yeah, I just, all of my emotional experiences were this private discourse with the piano. And that was always very important to me, kind of like, you know, all the way, you know, I say, get to high school and I'm starting to hear it. My sister was influential in showing me music. She was a couple of years older than me. And so,

you know, I heard Sarah McLachlan and I was like, oh my gosh, here's a woman who's singing deeply emotional songs and playing the piano. And I was like, oh my God, it's a real thing that people do. I didn't think, I didn't have an inkling at that point that that would be something that I would do, but I did perform like in church or, and the very first time I ever played piano and sang was my grade, grade 12, I think like final concert. And I was terrified, but

I wanted to learn how to play guitar at the end of high school. So I like, I've just, I found a person who had one in residence and I did that. And so you were 18 basically. I was 18. Yeah. But yeah. And then I just like, I just like loved learning. I was just obsessed with learning guitar. And I just, I just, it's all I could wait to finish class or finish like volleyball practice and come home and just like lay the guitar just for hours in the stairwells. And then

you know, meeting people and doing that. And then eventually started to go to open mics and to try and see what it felt like performing. And it was just like a full body buzz of just like stress and terror. People must have encouraged you when they heard your voice, which is absolutely beautiful. Thank you. That's very kind. You have, it's so unique unto you. Like, did you start getting comments immediately? Yeah.

Yeah, I was pretty, I was supported pretty like, yeah, right away. Like, I mean, I sang ever since I was a kid. Like, I do really feel so thankful for that gift. That was just a gift. I don't like, I've definitely come into my own voice as I've aged, you know, and learned kind of what it's supposed to sound like and what it can do. But, you know, I said, I do feel like it was a gift from my mother. And I was, it was a very musical household, very eclectic. You know, we didn't play in a family band, but my mom played in church. Religious household? Yeah.

Not religious, but church going? Yeah, we went to church. It was like Presbyterian, which kind of felt like, you know, I was living in a small community. My friends also went to the church and it was very like, it didn't feel like it was deep in the God stuff. It felt like it was deep in the community stuff. And maybe that's because it was PEI and it, because it wasn't Catholic. I don't really know. And I don't, you know, don't feel confident enough to like spout anything religious, but I definitely had

It was an extension of community. And my mom and my sister and I would perform together. Or I sang in the junior choir when I was a kid. It was just another thing that we did. But you had a career. You were doing something. You were an event planner, were you not, of sorts? Yeah, it wasn't a career. So it was a job. It was my first job off campus that I was actually on campus. I went to Dalhousie University, studied kinesiology. I did two years in, yeah, I did three years in student government.

Three years, two years in student government, maybe three, and which extended my university career by a couple of years. So I was on campus for 10 years in total because I got this job organizing events, which was my strong suit, which perfectly lends itself to the job that I do now.

Like student, I did a lot of student leadership stuff in high school, did a lot of university, did a lot of, I should have gotten a degree in extracurricular activities, really. But you had to say to yourself at some point, I am going to quit this. I'm going to go make my living playing music. Yeah.

Yeah. So I, I work while I worked at that job, um, I was always doing open mics and then I started to get like little gig offers. And then I was like, I'm not, I'm not being a good employee. I'm like, I don't care about this job. I wasn't doing as good a job as I should. And then, yeah, in 2005, I, I just kind of was like having a slow breakdown, um,

And I quit the September of that year. I prefer a fast breakdown myself. I just prefer the quick. Oh, listen, the fast ones are better. Haven't had both. The fast ones are better. Like drowning. He's just over quick.

Then, yeah, I definitely made like I was like, I definitely was inching towards it. And then when I felt like I had something to share, I was like, I'm just going to do it. Like it's I don't have money saved. I have a ton of debt. I'm going to go for it anyway. I did weird contract jobs so that I could make money. And then CBC here was in a position where they were going to help me make my first record. And it kind of went from there. I love that. I am. Were you surprised by what you were writing that the.

content of like what you were saying in your songs was that a surprise to because I have a feeling you were kind of like me in that way you that you were a funny kid you were a funny person and your music is not funny it is no bone chilling jarring um it's very visceral it can be it can be fun you certainly can write about you know but were you surprised

No, I wasn't surprised. No, I think I write the music that I, you know, I'm able to write it with words now where I really only wrote instrumental stuff when I was a kid. But it is the same, you know, it's like, I'm interested in exploring the dark parts, because when there's light shining, I think everything feels good. I don't feel like digging down, but I'm really am

about the different ways that people struggle and why we struggle and what we're struggling with and why is it so hard to tell the truth and why is it so hard to accept that someone blah, blah, blah. Like I'm so much more interested in the stuff underneath and I'm so

so grateful to people who are right happy upbeat great music but yes humor humor became a coping mechanism very early on for the just discomfort of being in a social situation of any kind so it's like it's like a

a social lubricant like alcohol or something else might be. And then it counters like you. And every time someone compares me to you, I'm just like, it's literally the highest compliment. But like, you know, funny in between terror, like very sad songs. It's just like, there it is, the yin and yang.

you know, it's like life is a roller coaster and so are our shows. And I'm willing to sing the thing that you feel because you don't even know necessarily how to say it. And we're just lucky that we, you know, have the gift to be able to kind of say something universal and, and like have, have it resonate with people. It's like, it's such a great privilege to be able to do that. So no, I wasn't surprised that I wrote songs. I love sad songs. The best. I've always,

I'm always surprised that people find it so polarizing to be funny and then to write songs of a serious nature where you can express yourself. I find the two so interconnected. There's something so sad about humor.

There's something so sad about, you know, when you, when you look at slapstick humor, somebody getting whacked in the head with a board that we all kind of go, Oh God, that looked like it hurt. But it was really funny. I remember sitting in my car and watching this woman on a very windy Calgary street corner. She had a very big hoopie skirt on and she had pantyhose and underpants like, thank the Lord. And as soon as she got one part of her skirt pulled down from around her head,

the back would go up and it was just like, it was like whack-a-mole with a skirt trying to pull this. Yeah. Well, I laughed so hard and I felt like, Jesus, should I get out of the car and help her hold one end of the skirt down? Anyway, um,

Oh, we're out of time. Of course we are. Adam's doing that thing where he's rolling his fingers. I think you are extraordinarily talented. You're one of the kindest people I know your ability to learn your desire to learn and expand yourself has always inspired me. Things that you tell me, I just take to heart. I'm not great with taking advice from anybody, but you have helped me through relationship things and you've, you've,

you've taken the time to get to know me. And that is, as I've gotten older, making new friends as I've gotten older has been my greatest accomplishment in my life. I don't, accomplishment's not the right word, but you are so dear to me and, and just, just, and to let me get to know you. And I, Adam's winding up the,

I'm sorry. Screw you, Adam. I'm kidding. Anyways, I love you, Rose, and you're extremely talented. I love you back, and I feel the same way about you, and thank you so much for having me, and yeah, I love you forever. Go check out this song by Rose Cousins, The Benefits of Being Alone. It is the anthem to COVID 2020, 2021. It's off the Bravado album. There's an accompanied video that you will find on YouTube. You'll find in all the... Anyway, go

Go check it out. Thank you for listening. Rose Cousins. We'll see you again. Toodly-doo. This podcast is distributed by the Women in Media Podcast Network. Find out more at womeninmedia.network.