(Don't Fear) The Reaper: A Nice Chat About Death
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Good morning, good afternoon, good evening. Welcome to the Jan Arden Podcast and Show. I'm Jan Arden. I'm here with Sarah Burke. I am in Springbank, Alberta. Sarah is in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. And we had a hell of a storm here last night. That's all I'm going to say. The dog woke up. I woke up at 2 a.m. Oh, no. And shiz was going down. And I have a flat metal roof. And it sounded like a 747 was coming in for a landing.

It was really freaky. I got up and I thought, I'm just going to check to see if this is hail because I just had visions of my garden being completely annihilated. And my garden's so good this year. It just looks so nice. Everything's coming up. I'm using beets. I'm using Swiss chard and kale. I'm

A week away from zucchinis. I got so many little tomatoes right now. They just popped. Oh, right? Yeah. I mean, it's sort of this mid-July-ish going into the first week of August that there's a lot of stuff that's ready to eat. Certainly here in Alberta. I think we're a completely different growing zone than you guys. A condo growing zone is completely different from everything else. Anyway. Anyway.

The condo growing zone. There's a few things we're going to talk about today. I sent Sarah a few, they're not really summertime topics, but it's something that people really shy away from talking about and that's dying. I'm kind of into it. I've just been talking to so many people about funerals, you know, in my 60s now, 61. And a lot of my friends who are in their, you know, 40s, 50s, 60s, they're having conversations about planning their own funerals.

and making sure that they have the right picture picked and the music's picked out. God forbid my husband should do it. He doesn't even know what I listen to. I've been married to the man for 26 years and I don't even know every time I put the sweater on that I've had for 10 years, he's like, is that new? No, there's a hole in the armpit. This is not new. So I was just thinking about how

But much still, we avoid anything to do with dying. I had this conversation with Cynthia Loist a couple of years ago. She told me she didn't have a will. I was just thinking about that because when I got this condo, my dad was like, you better get your will in order. And I was like, yeah, yeah, I'll get to it. Ask me if I got to it. Did you get to it? No. It's really important. I can't tell you how important it is to

assign your, I don't care if it's a pitiful couple thousand bucks or a chest of drawers, your shoes, your clothes, your hair extensions that cost you 2,500 bucks, your music on your phone. My vinyl. Good point. Good point. Your vinyl. I read an article not so long ago about a father trying to will his iTunes account and

to his son and the music that he had accumulated and being able to give his kid his password and just, you know, tally ho carry on. And then I think there was some kind of a hubbub with Apple. Well, no, actually Apple,

once you're deceased, that collection and everything that you've bought on Apple. But he was literally trying to will. And I think it was close to a half a million songs he accumulated on iTunes to his son. I'm searching, if someone dies, Apple. Okay. Let's see.

Let's see. How to request access to a deceased family member's Apple account. Every day, people all over the world save these important documents, memories in their Apple devices and on iCloud, including music. So there's an activation lock and you can set a legacy contact access key. I don't have a half a million songs on my iTunes by any stretch of the imagination, but a lot of people have literally tens of thousands of

probably 100,000 tunes on their Spotify, on their Pandora accounts or Amazon accounts. I'm just using iTunes because that was what the article was. But people are very reluctant to talk about dying. And especially if you have children, like I said to Cynthia, you've got Jaya. And you've got to figure out if something happened to you and Jason, or even just happened to you. Jason is going to need some instructions. I mean, we had a really good talk about it. We had a few laughs.

I've been redoing my will since I was 40. So I really didn't start having that conversation with myself until I was, you know, 40, 41, 42. Okay. I feel better. Well, cause I had a house.

And I had a few little things. I got a house. I got a car. I had a good mother. But I just, I didn't really think about it. And I just want to clarify this. It's not because I was scared. I don't think I'm scared of it either. I really am not. I'm not afraid of dying. My dad was mortified. He spent really the last, I'm going to say, good 30 years of his life being stuck in this perpetual loop of death.

I'm going to say terror. Really? Yeah. And I think it had a lot to do with him being raised in a very religious family where you, in the back of your mind, no matter how long you've been away from the church, and my dad split off probably as a late teens, 18, 19, he was like, I'm out of here. The word indoctrination is spinning around the globe a lot right now, but the indoctrination into a religious practice that has been handed down from great grandparents to grandparents to parents to you.

And it's like, you guys may have believed this, but I don't. But anyway, that is part of death, I think, with very religious people. The punishment that they feel like they're going to be facing. And I think my dad thought about that, Sarah. It kept him from having joy, I think, in his life, really experiencing that. There's something to say there about living like in the present, right? If you're living towards something you may never experience. Yeah. That seems kind of whack. On the other side of that coin was mom.

And she was not afraid at all.

is some kind of a belief system. Oh, there's nothing after death. And I definitely don't believe that. I call myself agnostic because I'm a wanderer. I'm like, could be that way, could be this way. Yeah, it's like an Easter egg hunt. When you think about your last days, how do you want it to go? Do you want all your people in one place doing a certain thing? How do you want the celebration of life to go? I would love to have lots of food involved. I definitely don't want to be anywhere near a church.

I think a community hall would be a riot. We used to go to dances out here at the Cooper Memorial Hall and it's on 17th Avenue. It is surrounded with mansions now. When I was growing up, like my parents and a couple of their friends would get together. They would rent the hall for probably 75 bucks and you got the keys to the hall. There was an upright piano. Sounds like a legion kind of.

Yeah, your giant vats of stainless steel coffee things. And sometimes they'd have a little band. And it was so terrible that it was fantastic, you know?

The bands could be so bad. They were brilliant. There's a fine line between complete hellish music and genius. Just listen to jazz. Who, if you could pick any band, any artist to play your celebration of life, who is it? ABBA. Well, you know, hopefully I'll be kicking around for a little while longer, but it does amaze me. I was just thinking about that, which is why I wanted to talk about it today. The reluctance to speak about your death.

People feel like if they do a will, that it is going to be some kind of a precursor to bringing your death a little bit closer to you. My mom was so, why would I be afraid of that? Why would I be afraid of dying? There's nothing to it. Jan, you're not even going to know. And I think people, when they associate death, they think about cancer.

They think about pain. They think about a long, drawn-out, really horrific physical experience. But I think that probably is the hard part. But the going, I think, is exaltation. I think it's going to be a big surprise for people. I think there is a long line of lineage and energy forces and entities that are there.

bringing you to the fold, which is another article that I sent to you. It's basically a woman who's kind of conjuring a lot of fear in people with the idea of perpetual, everlasting life that never, ever, ever stops.

And it's funny that the responses that she was getting on. It was on TikTok. Yeah. I'll have this link in the show notes. So if you're wondering what we're talking about right now, just hit the link. I'd like to introduce you to a little theory called the quantum immortality theory and Hugh Everett's many worlds interpretation.

Quantum immortality theory suggests that nobody ever actually dies. That consciousness never experiences death. Instead, whenever you die in one universe, your consciousness just gets transferred to a parallel universe where you survive. So let's just say all of these people who are anxiously and excitedly waiting for the end of the world are correct. If the quantum immortality theory is correct, you're just gonna wake up in a parallel universe with no memory of the fact that you've just survived an apocalyptic event.

The only hint, clue to the fact that this has happened would be new Mandela effects. So after the inevitable apocalypse occurs, you're gonna wake up the next day in a new reality. And the next thing you know, you're gonna find yourself on Reddit talking about, "Since when did Pizza Hut have two Ts?" Arguing with people who are native of this new reality, talking about it's always had two Ts.

So what I'm basically implying here is that in our reality, apocalypses happen every day. You don't believe me? Okay. It's been about 65 million years since the asteroids allegedly took out the dinosaurs. So you mean to tell me that in 65 million years, no other asteroids have come through, come through the neighborhood, take us out? You think we're just that lucky, huh?

Her name's Jolie, I think. What did you draw from that? She was suggesting there's a chance we never really die. Ever. And her thought is that even if you die in one universe, your consciousness moves to the next. And I mean, this immediately reminded me of an episode of Rick and Morty. I don't know if you've ever watched that adult cartoon. Yes. You have? Yes, I have. Oh, sweet Jesus, please let me live. Oh, my God, I gotta fix this thing. Please, God in heaven. Please, God, oh, Lord, hear my prayers.

Yes! Yep. I'm not opposed to that idea. But it caused panic. People were like, that is worse to me than just dying. You're in a crash, your life flashes before you, and then there's just darkness. I do not believe that. I don't even know how people can entertain that when you think about a universe. It's ever expanding. What's it expanding into? Welcome to the Jan Arden Podcast and Show. I'm Jan Arden.

We are just blowing our minds today, but we are. We're talking about doing your will. You're actually telling me you don't have a will. I don't have a will. I got to call my guy, Dov, my lawyer. Can I ask you why you're 36? Six. 36. Okay. So you're super, super young.

And you don't have a huge amount of equity, I would imagine. Are you renting your condo? No, it's just me in here. Do you own your condo? Yeah, yeah. I own my condo. So that is a huge chunk of...

of your life's earnings. You're sitting in it right now. So if you did not have a will, it would be so difficult for your mom and dad or your sister or your common law partner, if you happen to have one, I know you're single right now. It would be such a shit show, Sarah, for them to deal with your condo.

Yeah. Like you need to do this like tomorrow. Hear me out on this because you're also single right now. Okay. Maybe I put it off a bit because I was like, oh, I don't need to worry about owning this with someone or kids. Maybe that's why I put it off a bit. I get that. And trust me, there are a lot of, and I'm not going to say excuses. There are a lot of reasons. That's a better, kinder word for it. And then this comes up because people come and go in your life.

So, you know, here's me 25 years ahead of you. I change my will about every two years and it is mind boggling. You think your life never changes? You think you're kind of in this static place where, you know, your friends and the stuff you do and you get up and you make your bed, you go to the gym, you go to your job. And there's this static feeling sometimes to life that, okay, I'm this age, I'm in a routine. This is what I do. When I started redoing my will at 43, 44, I was like, oh,

oh my God, I'm not going to leave my blankety blank that. I'm not in that relationship anymore. This person that I was assigning a great deal of my wealth to, part of my house and my royalties, which basically come to my estate in perpetuity. You have songwriting stuff or books or whatever it is when you're dealing with intellectual property. So there's a whole other level to it.

But man, Sarah, the changes that I made going into those years, like it was so wide sweeping. And things like my dog. Like at the time, Middy, I was like, I've got to figure out who's going to get her. Because I had lots of people saying, oh, I'll take your dog when you die. And I'm like, no, you won't. No, you fucking won't take my dog. And I think people would have been surprised who Middy was going to go to. And I think people would have been surprised of...

how very little money I was leaving to relatives. Family versus friends, all that. All of that stuff. Okay, okay. I'm going to get my will. The whole idea, I mean, trust me, there's so many questions as to where we go, how we get there. Some people are adamantly locked into their idea of the afterlife. Unfortunately, there's so much people that are dealing with this black and white pain and pleasure thing

sin. And if you're doing it right, you're going to get through the pearly gates. And it's so funny how this stuff has been carried forward for thousands of years. Everything else has had to adapt and change and modify itself. Every kind of job, every industry, the way we live human life, religion has been steeped and locked into a lot of archaic practices. And don't get me wrong. I love ritual. I think it's important.

I think traditions are important, especially with your family, you know, your Jewish family. There's lots of, you know, when you talk about Hanukkah and Passover and these historical things that have made people really strong and in times of trouble, given them comfort and peace.

purpose. But like, for instance, there's so many traditions, religious traditions, because of some idea they got from religious writings. I don't even want to name the books because I just get into trouble. But writings that are left behind, animal sacrifices by the gajillions. But human beings over, you know, five, six, seven, 800 years, this is what it means. It's one thing when there's 100 million people on a planet and

And it's an entirely different thing when there's eight and a half billion people on a planet and the amount of animals that are caught in the crossfire of people

antiquated outdated completely moot things like that it drives me crazy anyway you're listening to the jan arden podcast and show we're not going to talk about death and dying but if you haven't got your will go get one sarah burke's gonna get one i'll start with updating my emergency contact baby steps jesus at the very least i got the ex-boyfriend on a few things a week ago i was like oh i should probably update that anyway we're working on it one day at a time will included i

I'm going to talk to you next week about what has happened because I am expecting you to get, you can go online and do a wheel kit, you know, and people are like, I just don't have the money to do that right now. You know what? Go get a pad of paper, write down basically, if you have one painting that you treasure, if you have a fricking skateboard, if you have an electric bike, it's going to be up for grabs.

I had a guy that I was in business with, Murray, pass away just before COVID. It has been a goddamn nightmare just because things were not done. You know, he was a businessman, busy, had a lot of layers to what was going on. And it has been

arduous, disappointing, causing a lot of anxiety to a lot of people, his family, his friends, his business partners, holy moly. And he was 49 years old. So young. Yeah. Massive heart attack. And he was gone. Boom. Nobody heard from him for like 10 hours. They're like, that's not like him.

Family, wife, kids, big house, all of that stuff. And here we are in 2023, four years after his death, everything's still up in the air. It is a nightmare. So what I was saying before I went into that little rant, get a pad of paper and write it down and say, I want Jim to get my electric bike. Get a friend, somebody to sign it. It is a legal document. Date it and sign it.

Put it in an envelope and send it to yourself. Then you get a postmark stamp from the government. Then you have an envelope. A lot of people do that with writing, with poetry. When they talk about copyright, they'll send it to themselves. They'll write a manuscript and literally put it through the mail. I mean, that's a little bit of archaic too, but people were doing that in the 70s and 80s and 90s. Who will I leave this microphone to? To me. You got it. Ladies and gentlemen, you heard it here first. I don't know if there's verbal...

Anyway, you know what you can have, Sarah? What? You can have my microphone. You can have my microphone. And I want you to have my Bailey Nelson glasses frames collection. You can take the lenses out. You're the sweetest. And you can put in your own lenses. No, they don't look good on you. You're listening to the Jen Arden Podcast and Show. We're going to be right back. Don't go away. Don't go away.

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Welcome back to the Jen Arden podcast and show. I'm still getting over my storm. I'm looking out and there's a lot of branches all over my deck, like little pieces of branches, cones. That was wild. I'm telling you when it's dark and stormy, I like a daytime storm. Just saying. I like falling asleep, listening to a storm. It's either that or waves coming on up on a beach. Oh,

Oh, before we go anywhere, I want to bring this up. There's a cruise ship that's launching in January 2024, the icon of the seas. Listen to this, 5,610 passengers, 2,350 crew. So there's almost one crew member for every three people. Five times larger and heavier than the Titanic. 19 floors, more than 40 bars, restaurants.

and bowling alleys. Apparently there's a church in there. There's golfing, there's water slides, there's mountain climbing, there's like eight swimming pools. Prices from $8,236 a person. Tell me why wouldn't you just go to Vegas? Why wouldn't you go to Vegas, which is the same thing, it's just on the ground and you don't have to worry about sinking, you don't have to worry about Legionnaire's disease or some kind of airborne pestilence?

You don't have to worry about coughing and sneezing and grubby little... You know, the thing that freaks me out more than anything is being trapped on a ship that size, perpetually looking for my room, surrounded by thousands of children.

Because this thing, why is that funny? Because you and I both don't like, I don't think we both like, I love my friend's children, you know, and the cousins and the whatever. But I can get in my car and leave. Yes. Yes. I can get in my car and leave. You can go bowling down the street. Why do you got to bowl on a cruise? I just think it is everything that's wrong with the world, everything that's wrong with climate change.

Imagine the fuel. Imagine the poo and the pee that 7,500 people accumulate

in, is it a 10 day cruise? Maybe they go for a week, maybe they go for two weeks. I don't know. Tell me where this goes to port. So anyone that's been on a cruise and I went with mom and dad 10 years ago for their 50th wedding anniversary, more than 10 years ago, probably 15 years ago. Okay. And because the ship was quite large, a quarter of the size of that thing. Okay. Cause I think there was 1200 passengers and I thought that was grotesque.

Anyway, we couldn't dock at a port and land where they put down the, I know it's not called a drawbridge, but forgive me, the gangplank. You can't just walk off. So we had to take tinderboats. You get a ticket for a tinderboat and you load onto these little boats that they have to lower down. They put you in there. You know, some days it was really rocky. You've all got your life jackets on. It's such a shit show.

taking you to the dock. And then you have to wait. You might get sick of wandering around after 90 minutes and want to come home, but you've got a tinder boat lineup that you have to hit again because you've got a thousand people that probably feel the same way. I've seen everything here. I've

I don't want to buy another fricking rug made out of whatever. I want to go back to the ship. And it's really tedious. It sounds like the culture of excess. That's everything wrong with the world right now. The particular cruise that you just mentioned. We don't need all of that on a cruise vacation. If the cruise vacation is to see the sea, then go see the sea. Don't bowl at sea. Don't,

Don't water slide at sea. You can do all those things on land. Our friend Caitlin Green said, this looks like a great way to simultaneously experience norovirus, COVID, and a severe panic attack. Good point, Caitlin Green. We agree with you. We do. We absolutely do. Roadside attractions. I don't know about you guys, but we always went to BC because it was so close to Alberta. Mom and dad would take us. So in six or seven hours, we could be in the Okanagan.

Or as my dad used to joke, oh, the Irish lakes, the O'Canagans. You're like, dad. Oh, here we are, kids. We're at the O'Canagans. But I'll tell you what, the roadside attractions, miniature land. What's miniature land? It was on the right-hand side of the highway.

My dad never, ever stopped there. We would beg him. It was probably two bucks each to get in, if that. You pull over on the highway and it was to scale like a Western town, a European town, a carnival, a little mini carnival that were like up to your kneecaps. It was all these recreations that you could walk through. And it's still there. And I actually went there as an adult a few years ago.

I pulled over just to do this thing. And I can't remember exactly what it was called. I know where it is because I still drive by it every time I go to Vancouver. But then there was another thing called Fantasyland. And my dad actually took us there one time. He's just like, this is so stupid. It looks so cheap. I could do a better job than this. Like that's how he wandered through it. But I was in awe. Like I think that's where my love of gnomes originated. You have a love of garden gnomes? Yeah, I got tons of them. I've got- Really? I must have.

or 80 gnomes strewn through my trees. When you walk down to the river, there's a lot of gnomes. Some of them are exposing themselves. I've got gnomes that are giving you the finger. There's a lot of nasty gnomes out there and that seems to be the ones that people are buying me. Yeah.

Note to self, when I come visit, bring you a gnome. Some people collect snow globes. You collect gnomes. You know what? I'm going to will you my gnomes. Can you imagine? I end up with this like letter served to me. You have inherited 400 gnomes. Let me ask you this. I just keep swinging back to this because I didn't get a chance to ask you. What would your idea of a funeral be like for yourself?

And do your parents ever talk about this with you, what they want? Can you be cremated? Do Jewish people cremate themselves or do they have to be buried? We're supposed to be buried in a Jewish cemetery. Although when you have tattoos, you can't be buried. So I'm out. Can you just explain that a bit? To be honest, I don't know what will happen because I think this generation of people with a lot of tattoos, like my mom and dad didn't grow up. And I think a lot of people their age didn't grow up with as many tattoos. Wasn't like as cool of a thing.

But I have two tattoos and my parents were very upset when I got them. How old were you? Were you a teenager or were you older than that? And they freaked out. First one, I was 16. Second one was 2010. So I would have been, I don't know, my mid-20s. I think...

It bothers my mom more because of the, you know, the Jewish culture more so than it actually bothering her personally, if that makes sense. Okay. And she's way over it now. But to be honest, I don't know what the rule is. I call myself Jewish. Like we follow a lot of the traditions, but I actually don't know what I should ask. I will report back to you about this next week. I'll have a chat. So what would you want? A rock band playing at a celebration of life. I was telling you, I went to see my favorite band ever.

a few weeks ago, Weezer. There is a lesbian Weezer cover band called Sheezer. Maybe Sheezer could play at your funeral. I wouldn't want it to be sad. I would want people to be coming and sharing their memories. You know, there's always a eulogy and there's always...

like a very sad tone. I would want it to be like a party. But that's kind of the, that's, that's sort of the religious aspect of it. I remember going to funerals with my mom and dad, like what, if he had a colleague that passed away in his sixties or something and you know, people sat in church. This is probably a church that this guy has never gone to in his life, but that's what you do. And there was the casket sitting up there, but I just remember this priest. Do you know that I never said one thing about what the guy liked?

It was nothing but this religious rhetoric of the almighty, all the father in heaven, Jesus, all God and father. Amen. And I just sat there and I thought, this has got to be the worst tribute to human life that I've ever heard. And I was 15 years old.

And every alarm in my body was going off that this isn't right. People should be getting up and telling stories about this guy. And, you know, even for my dad, I'm like, if anyone would like to come up and say stuff about dad and his brother got up and my cousin got up and just talked about it. Here's a maybe warped idea that I'm going to throw at you. I'm not someone who would want to plan a huge wedding and bridesmaids and all these things. You maybe have

Come to realize that over the last few months on the, I think we know that story. Anyway, what about those people that you would say are your bridesmaids being in charge of your arrangements at the end of your life? Those people who know you the best, making sure that all the things that you would have want with your people are all there. Funeral maids. What would you call that? Yeah.

I think just your, you know, your trusted companions, your fellow travelers. Even in my will, I've got these crazy heads on my wall. Don't leave me one of those. They're called bassons. I must have. Well, I probably have 50 up there at this point. Is this show Intel? Because then I have to show you my vinyl collection. Oh, yeah. See? It's probably 10 grand over there. Oh, for sure.

So those are going to just be at my memorial and people can take one of those heads. Oh my God. Take a head on your way out. Yeah. Just grab a head. And I think a lot of my little artwork stuff, take a whole bunch of my stuff there laid out on tables and literally take something of mine home. I like that. I did that with all moms. She had, you know, those plates, those decorative plates that you can buy and put on. People hang them on walls. They hang them around borders. My mom was running out of space. There'd be like...

geese chasing a child through a field and there'd be six kittens in a basket and there would be a lamb, you know, on a hill. Like that just needs to be laid out at a table and people will just take stuff. See how I keep going back to this dying thing? So this was another article that I stumbled onto last night. I apparently went down a rabbit hole because I was up with a 747 on my roof because of the storm. So I was just reading stuff.

trying to console my dog. In 2001, Dr. Linda Kramer, she went to the bathroom, this is a woman in her late 60s, something happened, brain thing, blah, blah, blah. She was clinically dead. I think her husband died.

Got her together. It didn't really say, but she must have, somebody must have found her. She regained consciousness in the hospital. They told her she had been dead for 15 minutes. She remembers being pronounced dead. She went to heaven. This is a doctor, a doctor that was very skeptical about this stuff. Linda Kramer was just like, uh, I don't know. This is that whole light at the end of the tunnel thing. She said she could take the form of anything she wanted to be.

She said she was walking behind this medieval woman dressed in medieval clothing. So she became the medieval woman. And as that woman was looking back, she was the medieval woman and she was looking back at Linda. It was all interconnected. And I watched the video clip of this woman, of her telling this story to Linda.

CBS News or something in 2001. It was so fascinating of how committed she was to talking about where she was. She said that 15 minutes was more like five years. She said they just walked everywhere. Anything you wanted to experience. She said there was a mountain range that was so massive. She said it made Everest look like a little pebble on a hill. And she just really had a hard time articulating the scope of this event.

world that had no physical limitations. Some people get there with meditation. Isn't that wild? I would do that.

I wish I could meditate to that extent. I've never been able to get deep enough into it. A lot of people say if you get deep enough into meditation that you can tap into a former life or a former time, like on a different plane. Well, she said she was a person that was afraid of dying. And after that experience, she was absolutely cavalier. She lived her life in such a different way. And I guess that's why I'm kind of going back to this is that I don't want people to wait forever.

in their lives. Oh, someday when I'm this skinny or someday when I have the right boyfriend or girlfriend or someday when I have the right job, you know, then I'll start doing the things I like. I cannot stress to you how important it is. There is a time limit to this. I'm not trying to scare anybody. It's all going to be fine. Every person that's gone before us in the history of life

has crossed over to another place and we carry on. We're such intrepid beings, but do the things you want to do. Make sure that you're in a job that you like. I think COVID was a huge catalyst for prompting people a little bit that there is a time limit to this. And so many people quit their jobs. So many people, there was an exodus out of cities. I'm one of them. I quit.

Yeah, not doing it anymore. And it really made people move that needle. She claimed that despite having extreme fear of dying prior, she wasn't afraid. She said there was absolutely zero fear. There wasn't like, get me back there. Get me back there. I got to go. There was no, I'm going to miss my children, my stuff, my money. She just completely gave in to what life really should be like.

The fact that we do everything to avoid talking about it blows my mind. And I had a mom that talked about it when I was eight, nine years old. We were at the dinner table and she had conversations about it. That's wild. I don't think my parents ever would have. It was the same as her talking about what kind of sandwich do you kids want?

What kind of funeral do you want? Well, she didn't talk about funerals and stuff like that, but she would always say, you're going to die at some point and you better do things that you like to do. Now, yeah. And it wasn't like, well, you kids, there's something that we need to talk about. She was just like, you're going to drop dead at some point. It wasn't padded. We weren't in a room filled with bubble wrap.

We were just, you know, plunged into this is what you need to think about. And so I always did when I was a kid. And I think it really pushed me in a direction of like, what do I really want to do? Yeah. And like living for today. It's so important. Yeah, exactly. So before we wrap, should we talk about next week and what we're going to do? What do you think? Yeah, let's do it. So

Sarah, you're coming to golf with me. You're golfing in the tournament? I golf. It's a shotgun start. It's for Enviros. It's the eighth annual Enviros Jan Arden Classic. We raise money for at-risk young people. The program right now is dealing with fentanyl, opioids, heroin, which are unbelievably difficult to shake. So yeah, Sarah has put together a foursome because there was a few spots left. I

heard her pals are flying here to Calgary. Do you want to hear the team name? Come on. Tell us who you guys are. Go ahead. Drum roll. We came up with the party girls. Party girls. But you're physically golfing. Yes. I golf every year. It's a shotgun start. So everyone's everyone starts at a different hole. You know, there'll be a hundred and whatever, 40 people out there, 180 people out there. I don't even know how many. What's your team called?

We don't have a team name. You know, I have a couple of friends that come along. My cousin's coming this year, my cousin Tracy. Fun. And that's my dad's sister's daughter. And she is a defense lawyer and she never takes any time off. And so she's going to come up from Lethbridge and she's going to golf with me. But then my friends, Lisa and Bev, Bev Oldham, who works for Enviros and she's going to be retiring in August.

She's going to be, I think, our honorary caddies. We've got some caddies coming out. Not really. I'm just like, bitch, grab me my club. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Two of the girls in our foursome, they're like, but we are really bad at golfing. I'm like, come on. It's going to be a great time. It's a great cause. It's fine. There's some great golfers. There's some terrible golfers. There's a silent auction.

We do a little speech. I meet everybody. I take pictures with everybody in the morning. There's coffee, tea, there'll be pastries and stuff. And then you get a, you get a lunch bag and then we have a really nice dinner afterwards. And there's a silent auction. There's all kinds of stuff that you can bid on. And you know, they announced the winners, the worst team. I think I would, I think I've been the worst team a couple of years in a row, but my cousin's a great golfer and it's best ball. So for those of you who are not golfers, yeah.

You have a four-member team and you each take a drive. Boom, boom. There. Fred's ball goes the furthest. It'll be my ball. So everybody goes, they pick up their ball wherever the hell in the bush it went, whatever lake it plumped into. You go grab your ball and you go up to where he was and then you shoot from there. But everyone in your team, you have to use two of their drives. So you can't use...

The best drive all the time. Like even when you have the drive that goes 10 feet off the tee box. Yeah. At some point you have to take Jan's drive and everybody has to hit from there. But it is such a riot. It's going to be so fun. The drink cart goes around. And what this means for the podcast next week is we're going to do this on the fly. There's not going to be a lot of editing because I want to enjoy my trip while I'm out with the girlfriends.

So I said to Jan, how do you feel about recording in person together, but not a lot of editing? Like we're just going to kind of wing it. And you were up for it, but I was thinking we could throw to our audience now for next week.

We're going to do ask us anything. Do you like that? Yes. So if you want to voice note us, that's cool. If you want to send us a DM, Instagram, Twitter, we're on threads now, I should mention. We've got a threads account. Whatever you want to ask us, there is no boundary. Obviously, we don't have to answer questions if it concerns some kind of

practices that maybe we don't want to talk about? We'll make sure we have some stuff to pick from, but send us your questions. Yeah, anything. By that time, we'll know who won the golf. No, we won't. We won't know who won the golf tournament. We will by the time. Yeah. Will we? Yeah, because we're going to record your golf tournaments the 19th. We're going to record a couple of days after the golf tournament, so we'll be fine. Okay, that's fine.

That's right. I was so shocked, Sarah, that you were coming out to the golf tournament. Why? I cannot tell you. Well, it means so much to me. You know, we're hoping to raise 40 or 50 grand. There's a success rate that Enviro should be so proud of. I, you know, I venture to say it's like 70 or 80%. And anyone that's dealing with the drug crisis right now knows that getting people out of that circle of...

Sorrow and integrating back into society in a good way. Yes. And we always have an alumni, one of the clients from Enviros, and it's an outdoor program. So it involves trees and camping and your personal best.

And letting nature heal you like fresh air, blue skies, rain, clouds, whatever it is, great counseling, great healthy food, water, walking, physical. And these guys come out of it. Anyway, one of the alumni's come. Everyone in that golf tournament is bawling their heads off. We're sitting there at our dinner. Everyone's having their beer or their wine and hanging out. And you have a young man talking about this program.

And that, you know, a lot of them are counseling now and helping, you know, paying it forward. And it's an incredible program. And I think my involvement has a lot to do with my older brother, who I've talked about many times on the show. That's what inspired us to come out, you know, like, I think it's really important. Thank you.

It's really important that we don't write these people off. Just because you have a past does not have to define your future. And addiction is not a character flaw. It's a disease. But I wish my brother would have had something like EnviroS, like this program up at Shonda, to be able to...

you know, do zip lines and rock climbing and just getting, it's almost when you start feeling your body again, you're like, oh, this feels good. And your brain is making its own serotonin and endorphins. And I'm just, I'm really thrilled you're coming. And then you and your girlfriends are going to, you're going to come and stay with me for a night or two. I know. What do I need to know about you as a morning person? Are you like up chirping with the birds? I'm up, I'm up at 5.30 usually. Oh my God.

But no, you won't even hear me. Poppy and I get up and, uh, but I'll make sure. But one thing you do need to know is that I don't have any animal stuff on my house. So don't expect cream in the coffee. I've got oat cream. Don't worry. We're good. I'm not going to make you bacon and eggs, obviously, but I've got,

I've got just eggs and I've got all kinds of great... Don't worry about us. I just want you to know, like, I'm not going to go out and get ham. Another Jewish... I will also not bring ham to your house. So don't worry. Well, I'm not saying... I mean, I'm not...

that much of a freak, but if people are coming here expecting that, but I can do waffles. I can do like vegan pancakes and waffles and you know, I just don't use eggs. I use like Don't worry. Applesauce. Okay. But we'll definitely watch a movie. We'll definitely do a podcast. We'll definitely, we'll walk down to the river. We'll get a good picture on Jan's road so that we've got that. Okay. We have to have that.

I think we have to go out to Bragg Creek. We'll go out for some deep fried pickles. Oh, now you're talking my language. Yes, but I have a gym. We're going to work out together. First time workout. We can go work out. You can show me a few tricks of the trade. I'm so down. I'm so down.

I'm so down. Okay. So between now and then though, please send us your, your questions. Cause we're going to totally be winging this next week and we're going to put it up almost exactly as it is from the recording. You know, sometimes there's some editing, but in this case next week, we're just going to kind of fly. So DM us, check out our threads accounts, the same as our Instagram at the Jan Arden pod. And we can't wait. It's going to be really exciting. Is that our show? I think we got to wrap. Yeah.

Yeah, I think we're out of time. Well, listen, I didn't mean to sound preachy. I love you guys. Jan Arden Podcast, hit that subscribe button so that you don't have to look for us week after week. You can hear us on iHeart, Spotify, iTunes, wherever you're doing your streaming, you can find us and give us a little review because that helps us too. It helps people find us. And get your well done or Jan will have something to say about it.

No, seriously, get your will done. We love you guys. Thanks for listening. You mean the world to us. We love all our listeners and tell your friends. Sarah, as always, you are absolutely fantastic. You're such a pro and you just make this so easy. So keep doing what you're doing. And I know you got a lot on your plate. So thank you. Thank you. I'm not the only pod.

Sarah has her own podcast too, Women in Media. So check that out. Go check out Women in Media. She talks to Debbie Travis this week, this past week, the wonderful Debbie Travis.

who also has a podcast called the Trust Me Pod. Trust Me, I'm a Decorator. Yeah, Trust Me, I'm a Decorator Pod. But the handle, sorry, is the Trust Me Pod, if you're looking for their socials, with Tommy Smythe. So there's so many podcasters, Cynthia and Josie, who have got Unmentionables, that podcast. If you're looking for other podcasts to listen to over the weekend, that's just a few. And Sarah Burke is producing all of them.

And this one is by far and away the best. I'm not saying those podcasts are as good as this one, but anyways, we love you. We'll see you next time. Toodly-doo. This podcast is distributed by the Women in Media Podcast Network. Find out more at womeninmedia.network.