cover of episode 116. Quick Thinks: Don't Sweat the Small Talk

116. Quick Thinks: Don't Sweat the Small Talk

2023/11/21
logo of podcast Think Fast, Talk Smart: Communication Techniques

Think Fast, Talk Smart: Communication Techniques

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Matt Abrahams: 许多人害怕闲聊,尤其是在节假日。但实际上,闲聊是一种被低估的连接、学习和创造机会的方式。它不像网球比赛那样需要来回击球,而更像集体玩抛接豆袋游戏,需要合作才能保持对话的持续性。成功的闲聊关键在于将目标设定为展现兴趣而非有趣,这有助于减轻焦虑。在回应时,适当的回应比快速回应更重要,暂停可以帮助思考并避免说错话。复述对方所说的话可以帮助减缓速度、仔细倾听并验证理解。在不知道说什么的时候,可以尝试“Tell me more”,这能给予对方更多表达机会,也给自己更多思考时间。沟通中的错误是正常的,应将其视为“错失的镜头”,并尝试不同的表达方式。在即兴发言中,简洁明了比冗长更好,避免像“造钟”一样,而应直接“报时”。即使是即兴沟通,结构也很重要,它能使沟通更紧凑清晰,例如“是什么?所以呢?接下来呢?”三个问题的结构。练习是掌握闲聊技巧的关键,应避免使用陈词滥调的开场白,尝试与环境相关的独特问题。结束闲聊时,应避免使用生物性借口,而应采用“白旗策略”,即提前发出结束信号,并留下一个开放式问题。 Rachel Greenwald: Rachel Greenwald提出“你的目标是感兴趣,而不是有趣”的观点,强调在闲聊中展现兴趣而非试图成为有趣的人的重要性,这有助于减轻焦虑。她还提出了‘白旗策略’,建议在结束对话时提前发出信号,并留下一个开放式问题,以更优雅地结束谈话。

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Small talk is reframed from a stressful tennis match to a collaborative hacky sack game, emphasizing the importance of keeping the conversation flowing rather than focusing on individual contributions.

Shownotes Transcript

Even if you don’t think you’re a natural, anyone can become proficient at the art of small talk by utilizing the right tactics and behaviors. In this collaboration with *Harvard Business Review, *strategic communications lecturer Matt Abrahams shares his tips and techniques for cocktail party chit chat, networking small talk, and holiday dinner-table conversation.

Watch the full video on HBR's YouTube channel).

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