Let's Be Crystal Clear...with Shannen Doherty
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Hi everybody, it's Savannah Guthrie from the today show as we head back to work back to school back to everything we want to help you turn your to do list into your today last your morning routine healthy meals and workout plans we've got you covered so you can take it all on with simple solutions to help you through the day everything you need to know before heading out the door so join us every morning on NBC because every day needs today.

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This is Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty. Hi, everyone. Welcome to yet another episode of Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty. That's right. The hat says it all. Merch is coming very soon, which I'm really excited about. We have some really cute things that we're putting out there. So today's episode...

I don't know. I'm not in a very good mood. So I don't really know what to tell you guys. You know, I think I'm not in a good mood for a couple of different reasons. And one, I'm probably feeling a little sorry for myself, which is not acceptable. And I know that. So I apologize in advance. But I just keep on asking myself, like, why is it that just because...

I'm in the public eye. And because I choose to share certain things on a podcast, why is it just there for everyone? Meaning like even before I choose to share it, it's out there for everyone. I don't understand why people can't get divorced. And okay, so let me back up. My attorneys for my divorce had to file more stuff in court, you know, stuff to compel, all of that good stuff. And

It's not like I go online and look up people's, you know, divorce proceedings and what they're doing and what's happening. And, you know, it's not like I write the briefs that go into court. Attorneys do. Same with my, you know, soon to be ex-husband. Like he doesn't write the brief, his attorney does. So, you know, they do their thing, which is great. That's what you pay them for. But I've never looked up somebody's divorce because I just feel like,

It's none of my business. And if they choose to share it publicly themselves, not just from a filing, but them personally, they do a podcast, they do an interview, whatever it is, then great. Then that's on them. Then they've decided to share that. But I don't understand why the minute we filed...

All these, you know, trashy nonsense magazines. And, you know, I keep on calling them all out, right? This is it's getting annoying. The InTouch weeklies, the TMZs of the world, all of them. It just like, what are you doing? You're sitting around and keep on checking a divorce or government or whatever the hell you want to call it site.

just to see if you can be the first to, you know, drop the bomb and break the story. We all know I'm going through a divorce. We all know it's not the most pleasant thing. So for me, I think, I don't even know if it came out yesterday or the day before. I've been avoiding it. I have refused to look and literally until today when I was going to record this podcast. And

It just was like, oh, my God, there's so many different nuances that people will never understand. And to take something just from a brief so that you can break a story is super annoying to me. But it's also, again, I don't do that. I don't understand why people find it so fascinating. Boredom.

wanting to make money off of a story, whatever it is, I can tell you that it's really hurtful. And unfortunately, there was no way for me to

do it more privately. It is what it is. You can ask a court to have documents sealed all day long. They'll either decide they're going to seal them or not. I've had court cases where certain documents about my health have been sealed, but other things have not been sealed. And this was kind of the case here too. I didn't want this all to be so public. Yes, I discussed sort of what happened, but

But in very broad terms, A, I could get in trouble. And B, just because, you know, maybe I'm not ready to discuss it. Maybe I'll never be ready to discuss like the full details. I don't know. Or maybe I'm just waiting for the divorce to be over. And then, you know, I'm happy to discuss it. But I just think it should be on...

The two individuals that are going through it should be on their terms and not on everybody else's. So, you know, that's been exhausting because obviously a divorce is not easy, especially when you really love someone. And I did love my husband. And when you get so hurt by their actions that you just feel betrayed and like a sucker, it's really hard.

but also because I'm going through a lot of health stuff. I am, as we all know, stage four cancer, which is at this point in time not curable. But protocols start working. Your body adjusts to them, becomes immune to them. Your cells change. Your cancer cells adapt. The molecular makeup of them changes, and then you have to go into a different protocol. But before you even realize what's happened,

you know, your cancer progresses. And I, back in 2016, when I got my very first chemo, I had to get a port right here on my chest. You can get a port either in your chest or I believe on your arm somewhere. And I chose chest because I was told that it was the best place in the sense of like, you're not hitting it all the time when it's on your arm.

And I remember when I finally was told I was in remission and I was able to get the port out because the port was in for, I think, a solid year. And it made me feel awkward, right? Like the port made me feel because it kind of stands out. It's like a thing for those that are not familiar. It's a little round thing that goes into your chest and it kind of pokes out a little bit.

Yes, your skin covers it because they put it under the skin, but it still protrudes from your chest. And I just always remember being uncomfortable with this poured in and feeling like it made me feel more and more and more sick mentally.

And so when I was finally able to get it out, I was thrilled. I was over the moon. I was like, oh, I'm normal again, even though I have like a scar there. I just felt like I had really turned a corner in cancer and had beat it. Flash forward, obviously, I didn't beat it. I went to stage four and I was really on like a lot of chemo pills and stuff of that nature. And when I finally had to start doing an infusion again,

I opted to not do a port and instead I opted to go through the process of getting an IV needle and having them do the chemo through IV. The end result, of course, is that I collapsed all my veins in my left arm.

I couldn't do it in my right arm because of lymph nodes being removed in 2016. And so you have to worry about like edema and all of that stuff. So I really crashed my left arm, but I thought I was fine.

cut to now and I am having to go back on chemo. And I now know that I can't do it the way that I was doing it, that I have to get a port. And it's really hard. Like the idea of going through that all over again has wrecked me. Sorry, I'm going to pause for a second, collect myself.

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Hi everybody, it's Savannah Guthrie from the Today Show. As we head back to work, back to school, back to everything, we want to help you turn your to-do list into your today list. Your morning routine, healthy meals and workout plans. We've got you covered so you can take it all on with simple solutions to help you through the day. Everything you need to know before heading out the door. So join us every morning on NBC because every day needs today.

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That's ChumbaCasino.com. Sponsored by Chumba Casino. No purchase necessary. VGW Group. Voidware prohibited by law. 18 plus. Terms and conditions apply. It's wrecked me in the sense of like, yes, I knew I had stage four. Yes, I knew it was really serious. Yes, I've taken steps to, you know, protect my family and, you know, clean up a lot of stuff. But when you have to go to the hospital and you have to, you know, get put under in a port, put in you.

it becomes very real in an incredibly different way because I have no idea how long I'm going to be on the chemo for. I have no idea if it's going to be, you know, three months or if it's going to be six months or if we're going to, you know, if after three months it's not working, if we're going to change again. Like, I don't really, that's not something that I can predict. It's not something my doctors can predict. And it's,

It's scary. It's like a big wake-up call. At the same time, I got to say that there is some positivity there. And the positivity is that because my molecular structure of my cancer cells changed recently, it means that there's a lot more protocols for me to try. So,

You know, for the first time in a couple of months, probably, I feel hopeful because there are so many more protocols now. Whereas before I was hopeful, but I was still getting prepared. And now I'm like, oh, I don't need to be prepared. I need to go on a vacation. I need to go on a boat again and explore places. I will forever be that girl who is like bucket list, bucket list, bucket list, even if I was

You know, now in remission, I would still always be like, I need a bucket list and I need to start fulfilling it. But so there is hope mixed with my own bit of sadness because, again, I just don't know what all these chemos and it's more than one chemo that I'm going on. We're kind of throwing like the kitchen sink at it. So I think I'm going on two different chemos within the same day.

And I don't know how I'm going to feel. I don't know if I'm going to be, you know, throwing up like I have in other protocols. I don't know if I'm going to be, you know, passed out on my sofa, my den with the AC blasting because I just don't feel well. And that is, it's a little scary. I know that I'm slowly going to lose my hair again, which is horrible. I think this will be the third time

I've lost my hair and every single time, like the first time I lost my hair, it grew back and it was actually really cute. It was like kind of curly, wavy, and

Right now, my hair is like super wiry and coarse and it'll be stick straight, but like coarse where it just goes in all directions. And a lot of you have commented on my fabulous hair. And I got to tell you, this is like so in fashion.

weave basically that this place called Lucinda Ellery out here does for cancer patients and it's pretty amazing you can get MRIs with it it has no metal and it just stays like you can wash it you can go swimming you can do whatever and you've just got this you know

nice hair, but underneath this beautiful weave is hair that's like maybe this long, but it sticks out. When I wake up in the morning, it's really pretty. Maybe I'll take a picture and share it on my social media and track the progress of me going from my weave to my real hair to what it becomes after chemo. And I'm really weird with chemo. I'm like the girl that

doesn't do anti-nausea medicine, and there's a reason for that. When I did anti-nausea medicine, I was more sick. Interestingly enough, I couldn't throw up for like five or six days, but I felt like I was going to throw up. But the anti-nausea was preventing the throwing up. So like on this last protocol I was on, it was –

Well, no, I was on a pill one and then infusion in her too before that. So instead of just throwing up right away, I would feel like I was going to throw up for five days, be really, really, really sick. And then I would start throwing up. So it would last, like my sickness would last, I think, like 12 days. And then I would have to go back on medication.

the chemo like six days later or something. And what I discovered is because I was like, just stop giving me the anti-nausea. And it was so funny because the nurses were like, no, no, no. Particularly one nurse was like, no, you need to take it. And I was like, don't give it to me. I had to call my doctor, Dr. Pirro and be like, listen, you got to tell them that I'm the patient. I know my body better than you, better than anyone. And he was like, that's absolutely true. You do. So I

had stopped doing the anti-nausea. And what I found was that I was sick the first three days, like throwing up, and then it stopped. And then I just needed one day of like pure sleep. And then I was fine. And my life returned like back to normal. So I don't know what this new protocol is going to be like. And it's, you know, it's really scary to know that I go in for my port tomorrow.

I go in, you know, I start chemo probably a couple of days after this episode is out. I go in for my first round of chemo. And to just be walking into the unknown, I just feel like my life has been unknown for over a year now. Between divorce and cancer, it's like I have no grasp on it and I have no control. And most people who know me know that I'm like a control freak. I like to control things.

And with cancer, there's really no controlling it. It doesn't matter how much research I do. It doesn't matter how much like natural, holistic, like, believe me, you guys, I try everything. I'm very much a person who is open to all of that. And it doesn't help me. And medicine and science has kept me alive and helped me the longest.

But it comes with fear. It doesn't matter, you know, like I asked my doctor today because I had to go get a bunch of pre-op done. And I was like, am I going to lose my hair? Am I going to do this? Am I going to do that? Like I had 10,000 questions for him and, you know, he's fabulous. So he answered all of them. But, you know, sometimes the answers aren't great. Sometimes you're like, oh, again, I don't want to lose my hair. I don't want to be sick. I don't, I want to be a normal person. And, you know,

That brings up with some people who go, well, maybe you should just stop all of it and have quality of life over quantity of life. And I've had that thought. Believe me, I've been like, huh, but I know that my quality of life is actually being here longer. My quality of life is reaching my goals and staying with my family as long as I can and

And really, really pressing the organizations that I work very closely with on cure and research clinics, like one that I'm now involved in. And like, I'm, you know, I'm not the person who likes to give up very easily.

I just don't want my sickness to last that long. I'm very selfish, apparently. Because I just, yeah. So I will, you know, try to be on here a lot more. Not a lot more, but I'll try to keep my schedule here. If I don't do an episode one week, I apologize. It's probably because I'm super sick. But...

I'm praying that that's not the case, just like I'm praying that, you know, the headlines stop and that people really learn to, and not you guys, I'm talking about like, you know, the press, that they really learn that everyone deserves privacy and deserves to live a life of privacy.

in in quiet if they choose to and then it's up to them to share their health diagnosis their divorce their new relationship what's going on with their dog like whatever it is it's

I don't think actors sign up so that they can be in every newspaper. You got to remember, I'm not a reality star. I didn't sign up to be on reality shows. I didn't sign up to be a celebrity and have my photo taken every single time. The amount of press I turn down on a regular basis is insane because I just have no desire to do it. I signed up to be an actor to change out of Shannon into something else and be somebody else. And...

And I just really wish that there was some respect for that. And more importantly, that, you know, our country would lay down some laws like it's like the TMZ. OK, if you're going to write about me, then you're fair game. When I dig through your trash, when I dig through your closet of skeletons, when I start talking about you, I don't really care to talk about you.

B, I don't have time. C, it's too much negative energy and bad karma and I don't want that. But, you know, that is the reverse side of it is that

You don't see actors doing that to these journalists who write mostly false information about them or expose stuff that nobody has the right to know. So I know I'm jumping around from health to press, but to me, it all ties in together because right now I'm asking for privacy. I'm asking to be respected by these journalists.

journalists, that's right, I'm doing air quotes, you guys, because they're not really journalists. They're like, I'm going to be nice and just say that they're not journalists. I'm asking them to respect my privacy right now and to leave me the fuck alone. And I am sick. I'm going through stuff.

And when I want to share it, I will share it. Otherwise, leave me alone. I'll share it with my fans because I love you guys. Journalists, like these journalists I'm talking about, I have zero respect for. And as far as health goes, you know, fingers crossed. I'm praying for the best. I can tell you I'm not going anywhere right now. I can tell you that...

The new researchers that I'm involved with that are helping me cope with all of this along with my main doctor, I really believe in. I have a lot of faith in. Their clinical trials are insane. I will share those guys with you as soon as I get clearance and as soon as I know how they're impacting my cancer. But I'm going to cut this one short today because I'm really tired and I have to wake up

so early to go in for surgery tomorrow. But I love you guys. Thank you so much. Thank you for listening to Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty. Merch coming soon and updates coming very soon. But thank you.

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