Kian & Ayla on Having a Baby, Breaking Up & Why They're Not Getting Married
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He's more to me than my boyfriend. I'm baby daddy now. Yeah, but I don't want to call you baby daddy. So I told him, I told him recently that I want to be engaged for the rest of my life. Are you like scared of the idea of marriage? Of commitment? I'm just like kind of a realistic person in the sense that we never know where things are going to go. Like what if we don't know? It's so hard. We came to each other and we're like, this isn't working out. We should probably separate. And then he moved out.

I knew I wanted to get back together. The second time was a little different. I think we both had the same. We broke up two times, by the way. This episode is sponsored by Caraway Homes. What's up, dudes? And welcome back to the Unplanned Podcast. Y'all. Woo!

Why do you always say that part? You know, I really don't know. It's just always been that way. It's more your personality. I'll be honest with you. I know it's probably premature, but how do you end your podcast? Anything specific? Peace out, dudes. Okay, who came up with this? Was it you? Yeah, when we first started. Well, it's because I always call Abby dude and people thought that was funny. So then we started. He ends up coming up with the most annoying thing for our YouTube channel. That's why I brought it up because I don't think it's annoying. I think it's pretty good. What do you say? Okay, so our YouTube is

our diary of three okay it's gonna be different when we have another one because we'll have four but for now our shortened it's ODO3 our diary of three so for the very end of our videos I say ODO3 O and she hates it because have you

seen back in the day that guy he was what's his name liver king liver king liver king yeah did he get in trouble with like steroids or something people were like he got caught like taking some he's super he's like the most jack you've ever seen in my life liver king is like this guy i don't necessarily love him because he eats raw well okay it's it's in a humane way i guess but he eats like raw meat every single day like like hearts but like but liver liver everything he

He eats anything from an animal. Everything. You guys have never had pork butt? Are you guys not from like the Midwest where people eat pork butt? No, all I eat is this corn. Oh, you can't see it. I have corn tattooed on me. Corn? But his, basically at the end of his videos he goes, liver king out. Liver king out. And he started doing it for

No, I don't want to be associated with Liver King. I like make it so much extra. He just says like, Liver King, out. Here, I would be honored to have Liver King on the podcast. That's what I'm saying, yeah. And eat some raw butt. Oh my God. I don't know if I'd do the ODSB out right there. I didn't mean it like that.

You said some weird stuff, dude. He said he wanted boobs earlier. I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that, you guys. You always put your foot in your mouth. I do. Why are we having a podcast? I'm going to get myself in trouble. I think it's so funny, though. I feel like we could call ourselves the tatted up gang because all of us have tats. Did you guys know that? We're all tatted up. I noticed that you have a sleeve. I noticed you have some tats. And we have tats, too. No, you do not. We have matching tattoos. You ready to show them? Three, two, one. This is so weird. Why do you always

I knew it was going to be there. Oh my gosh. Dude. That's it, dude? What does yours say? Dude. Yep. Whoa. I didn't forget that. I don't even want to show it. You got lip tattoos. I don't even know why you always count down. Do they hurt? No. No. Yes. But it wasn't bad. It was quick. Oh, yeah. That's got to hurt way more than this. Those are fake. His one that hurt the most was in his hand, actually. But I believe that. Made in the USA. Just in case I get lost. Mm-hmm.

Here, I got it. I need to intro you guys. Where all the nerve endings are? It was the absolute worst. Yeah. The worst before that was here because it was straight just bone. There's nothing to kind of like absorb. The palm was like unbelievable. Yeah. I'll never do it again. I feel like it also kind of tickles. No. Zero percent. No. Okay. Zero percent. Maybe you want to punch the nearest thing. By the way, Ayla was throwing me. I was like.

Before I do your intro, you said you have a corn tattoo. Is that because you're from like, are you from Nebraska? I'm from Iowa. Iowa. I'm from Iowa, but it was Sioux City, Iowa. So it was like there was a bridge that separated Sioux City and like the neighboring town where my grandpa lived. I don't remember it, but Nebraska, Iowa, it's kind of the same thing to me. Have you been to South Dakota? Because I've actually never met someone in my life from that state. I feel like that state is actually just like vacant. It's on the map.

And like nobody knows anybody from South Dakota. My mom has like a best, best friend that I call my aunt in South Dakota. Okay. She has like a ranch and all these horses and stuff. So like I grew up South Dakota. It's in like the top left corner of Iowa and top right of Nebraska and bottom corner of South Dakota. So right there was like my home. Oh, sick. So yeah, short answer, yes. You heard it here first, folks. South Dakota does exist. It does exist. We've talked about this before. I just feel like it's not a state. That's where the Mount Rushmore is.

Oh, that's right. That is correct. The president. That's, you know, that. We need to go there. Yeah. Honestly, I would love to go there. Let's go there together.

That's all they have there, though. For those of you that don't know Kian and Ayla, they just started a couple slash family channel on YouTube, but their story doesn't start there. Kian is an OG YouTuber who started in 2010, and he's been in various movies and TV shows. And Ayla is a lifestyle slash fashion creator with a strong following on both YouTube and Instagram. And she was Logan Paul's assistant. Is that true?

I like saw a video pop up when I was researching you guys and it was something about you like being Logan Paul's assistant. And I was like, no way. That's crazy. Yeah. It's, I mean like that's kind of in the beginning of, uh,

I had done social media a little bit before that and I had kind of like started to grow my following and then I happened to him and I were good friends we all lived in the same building it was like where all the influencers lived at one time in Hollywood and he needed an assistant but it was also I always tell people it's kind of like I was an assistant but I was also like a character on his vlog so it was like more than just doing assistant work it was kind of like

him just doing things and like I was I was like playing like a character too like I was always like the mom trying to like get them to calm down and do stuff so my following grew like substantially I think I had like 100k at one point and then I just like skyrocketed because he was posting every single day wow so people just kind of gravitated towards me and they were like oh we really like

I guess. And then that's how that happened. But so, yeah, that was a point in my life. I don't think anyone posts every day anymore. I feel like every day posting is like. Yeah, I don't know anyone that does it anymore. Are you on TikTok though? Yeah.

Because I feel like there's so many TikTokers that do that literally every day. TikTok is way easier to do that, I feel like. YouTube, that's hard. I don't know of anyone posting on YouTube every day. I just watched the Jake Paul documentary on Netflix, and they were talking about this competitive rivalry that they had. Was that weird being the assistant? Did you ever get this vibe of, man, these brothers are so competitive. They just are always trying to... It's all for camera.

Really? I mean, majority of the time they love each other, you know, like they're brothers. And a lot of times like they would have phone calls before videos would happen being like, okay, I'm going to do this and you're going to act like this and blah, blah, blah. And then it looks like a rivalry online. But realistically, like they were fine. They were friends. I don't, maybe, I don't, I don't,

I don't really know. Maybe there was times when it was actually real, but as far as what I saw, it was a lot of just planned out things. That makes me feel better. We actually got in like an argument when we watched the documentary. Oh yeah. Because we have two boys. And so I was like, Matt, never let our boys be competitive. Like they can be competitive. He's like, well, I think competition is good. I was like,

I would too. They were for sure on the same page. They weren't trying to really hurt each other. That's good. Because I was like, they can be competitive with anybody else in the world, but not your brother. Like, that has to be your ride or die. I know.

I don't think you get it, though, because I have two brothers, and we were competitive, but we still loved each other, and we care about each other. You have to be competitive. You just compete with your brothers. That's what you do. And you wrestle, and you beat each other up, and sometimes you hate each other as a brother. I threw scissors at my brother. Yeah. I have two older brothers. They're my half-brothers, and they were fighting. They were wrestling and being competitive. And one of my brothers says, help, and I was super young at the time, so I grabbed scissors, and I threw him scissors. He got it.

I threw him scissors to like think I would help and it hit him and like went in his leg. Oh frick. Oh my goodness. It was cold. I chucked a ping pong paddle. My brother crushed me in ping pong and I was so mad. I threw a ping pong paddle at him. I think I was like 13 or 14 and there's still a dent in our wall where the ping pong paddle went in. Oh I used it on the wall. I thought you were going to say his head or something. No not on him. Not on him. It's going to make me so

sad when they have their first fight. It's inevitable. It's gonna happen, honey. But I just hope that they'll be best friends, not arch enemies. I just want them to always be on the same team. But even you and your brother were, like, arch enemies and now you're best friends. Like, now you guys get along just fine. We also had fights over ping pong. I feel like every sibling, I mean, I used to be so annoyed with my brothers. Like, I would always be like, Mom, this brother did this, this, like, and now...

i don't know we're all so close like it's so nice i feel like it's just time yeah it's just seeing like the logan paul videos and how like wild things were like did you ever expect that dude would get married because i just like i saw that he got engaged and i i just thought that was so like i was like oh wow he's like he's he's gonna be roped up what's what's the word locked up locked up ball and chain oh ball and chain i've heard of ball and tie down tie down there we go

Leave it to you to mess up. I'm sorry. I can't remember stuff. I don't know. I guess I'm... Yeah, I don't know. Like, I'm... I feel like we're all just getting older. Like, everyone's like... It's very weird to... Yeah. Everyone's maturing. You know what I'm saying? And I feel like... Yeah. You know, maybe you watch YouTubers back in the day and, you know...

regardless of just him, like there's so many YouTubers sometimes you just like, you envision them a certain way. And so when people are getting older and, you know, like they're having kids or they're getting married, it's almost like hard to understand. You're like, wait, what? Yeah, because you have this vision of them when you grow up watching them or like you see like a couple of videos of them, like you see them a certain way and then you hear that they're having a baby and you're like, wait, that wasn't part of what I was thinking.

like envisioning so yeah baby marriage I mean people were even shocked when like you know Kian got a girlfriend and I were having stop when Kian and I were having

a baby you know i mean like obviously everyone was so happy for us but like there were so many comments of people being like i've been watching kian since i was like 13 or whatever and it's so insane to me that you're having like you're gonna be a dad you know so i feel like that's just like life like it's but it's cool because then you get to see like everyone's like other people we just grow up you know we like get more mature and this is what happens so yeah i think it's really cool that he's getting married i feel like it's i'm happy that he's like but

- Like that's, I don't know, we all should be, right? - Yeah. - Or not, I don't know. - And like along that same lines of growing up, Kian, did you ever see yourself being a dad or did this just come out of nowhere where you're just like, oh, okay, this is happening, I'm a father, like I'm about to be a father. - That's what I was gonna say, I feel like I keep cutting her off and I feel bad. People say, oh, I grew up watching Kian, it's so weird to like see him become a dad.

I looked at myself in the mirror and I thought that. It's just weird. Yeah. And it's like, growing up when I was like a teenager, I hit 21 years old and I was like, 21? Like,

I can drink. Like I'm not supposed to be 21. I don't feel 21. It's weird. Like that's how I felt that I felt about being a dad. I was like, I can do this. Like I'm gonna be a dad. It's just so weird. I grew up thinking this thing of like thinking like a certain way about myself. And then I found that I can like explore new things and like become a dad or like have a serious relationship, buy a house and start a family. It's like, I never thought that would be a thing for me, but it is. Yeah. I think this is also, it, it, it scares us too. So I feel like,

I don't know. I mean, even when we found out we were pregnant, we were scared. - I was gonna ask, was that something you talked about for a while or was it just like, oh, baby's on the way? - Was it planned? - We've been through both ways. - We've had both ways happen. - The second one was unplanned. - Yeah. - That's the video I saw. I told them that the first TikTok I saw was them in the bathroom, Abby crying. I think you were like just woken up or something. - Yeah, I woke him up. - I was so tired. - I was like, get in here. - Yeah. - Trying to get my brain to work.

was like man I could have made it like a cute thing telling him but I was so in denial I was like just get in here and tell me if this is positive that's the first one I saw of you guys I love that you filmed that because that's just so realistic I mean and I kind of wish that I filmed but I didn't know I kind of just took a test in my head because I was like

already late on my period and I've been late before and I was talking to my sister about it I didn't let him know because I had done that before where I'd like let him know I'm late and then he got a little excited one time he was like oh really like you think he's like okay like that that could be kind of cool you know

I'm sorry. I'm eating Pringles right now. I was doing it away from the microphone and then like everybody started looking at me. He was like, give me one. He was like, can we get some snacks? He put it in between his toes. Before we started filming.

Bro, I'm telling you, you gotta try it. Bro, try those cookies right now. Did you try one? I had two of those. They're so good. They're vanilla wafers, but they're a little bit better. We have a new sponsor now? No, it's the vanilla wafers. Literally none of this is a sponsor. We just are eating these. Yeah, Pringles, can you sponsor us? Thank you. I'm so sorry. You were saying a really serious thing. Yeah, I was really on the edge of my seat.

And I just started eating Pringles. So like, please, let's go back. Yeah, basically. So I didn't tell Kian because the last time he got excited and then it was like a letdown because I was like, oh no, it wasn't a letdown. It was more of just like. I was, but it was because we're like kind of trying for a little bit. We like downloaded this app and it was like, oh, you missed your period by three days. Like, and I was like, okay, okay. Yeah. And then it wasn't. So I was like, oh my God, that dumb app. Like, I just don't.

I don't want to do this anymore. That's sweet. Yeah, so the next time when it happened, I was like, okay, I'm not going to say anything. I'm just going to see if it's late again because maybe I'm just off. And I was telling my sister, and my sister was like, wait until you're like eight days late, you know? And I was like, okay, okay, okay. I was on basically my seventh day, and I was like, man, I still don't have anything. I was also feeling like little things that were kind of weird. I slept too.

one day, like fully in the afternoon, like a hard sleep. Not just like a little nap. Like I was out. And that was kind of weird for me and I was like, okay. But we were going to New York because he and his best friend, JC. Best friend. Boyfriend. Boyfriend. Girlfriend and a boyfriend. Boyfriend. Yeah, boyfriend and girlfriend. I'm respecting him. Yeah, he's got all these people in New York. No, they were doing a pop-up shop for their brand. And...

I knew we would get there and there'd probably be like champagne to toast and all these things and I was like okay I feel like I should take it now just so I can like ease my mind I literally was I think I was in a Christmas onesie in February I was just like oh the red one yeah I'm literally just like not even paying attention to what's happening but we had pregnancy tests in the house already so I just took one and I took it went outside sat outside for a little bit and then I saw Kean walking into the bathroom I was like what are you doing he's like going to the bathroom and I was like

okay, wait, I left something in there. Can I just go in there real quick? So I went into the bathroom and I flipped it over and it was not like a faint line. Like it was like line, line. Like you are pregnant. Like there's no chance. Yeah, just said yes. I was literally just like...

Like, wait, what? Because you just don't expect it to be real. You just expect it to be another, like, honestly. It is like an out-of-body experience. Yeah. Even if you're, like, trying, you know it's a possibility. Yeah. And I, like, I took out my phone and just filmed my reaction in the mirror, like, after I already saw. And I was kind of, like, shaking, like, hyperventilating a little bit. But I was smiling. And then...

And then I was like, okay, how am I going to tell Kian? Should I plan something cute, fun, exciting? And then I was like, I can't even walk out of the bathroom right now without hyperventilating. So I just called him in and I propped up my phone and I showed him the test. I hate my reaction. Yeah, his reaction...

You agree with my, I hate my reaction? Well, your reaction. You hate it too? I don't hate it. But it's just funny because it's not what people would think. It's not in the movies. He stares at this thing for no joke like 20 minutes and doesn't say a word. He's just like. Okay. He's like, whoa. There's like one minute. And then he's like, are you sure? It's like 60 seconds. And then he's like, hold on. He goes, is this real? And then he keeps staring at it. And I'm like sitting there talking my mouth off. And I'm like, I had this and I'm panicking. And he's like.

are you sure this is real and i'm like yeah like because he was in shock it's just so weird to like talk about something and then like hear stories about your friends or your parents saying like pregnancy like you hear you hear it everywhere and you know whether it's a lot or a little like you just hear about pregnancy and talk about it blah blah the second it happens it's just a whole different feeling so i think i got like

Like a wave of too many emotions that I just like froze. Yeah, he didn't know what to do. I was like, whoa, it's real. And it's weird because like when you find out, it's like you find out and it's happening right now. Like it's already been happening. Yeah, for sure. And you're like, wait, what? Yeah. I was pregnant then. I was pregnant yesterday. I didn't even know it. Like it's weird. When we found out, were you like seven weeks, six weeks, five? Maybe it was four. Or three? I think it was four.

I think it was five or six. Probably five. It is weird to think that at that point you had been pregnant for five weeks. We knew when it happened too because we had this vacation that we had taken and we were like, oh my God, it literally happened on that vacation because we also have this friend of ours who is pregnant and she told us to rub her tummy and we were like...

We were like, ha ha, okay. Literally worked. This is why our friends were like, rub the tummy, rub the baby. Like, I promise you it's good luck. That's so funny. And we got pregnant. I was like, can't. Keep in mind. Do you actually believe that rubbing the belly made it happen? Absolutely not.

I believe that when women hang out with... I don't think this happened with her and I because it was just too... Maybe it did. I don't know. But I think when women hang out with other women who are pregnant or their hormones start connecting, just like...

You guys probably don't know, but when periods connect, like, you know, when you hang out with your girlfriends, like, they sync. I think that also happens with pregnant women. So I always feel like, you know, yeah. What's going to happen here, then? She has two babies. We have one on the way. What's going to happen after we date? That was twins. It's like Freaky Friday or something. Oh, my gosh. Like, sharing information. No, but I do believe in that part. Were your parents pretty excited? Yes. Yeah. So the parents were kind of, like, because it was, like...

semi-unplanned for us. It was like we were trying and then we kind of gave up and then it worked and we were like, whoa. Okay, so it just took everyone by surprise, I think. My mom was very excited but it was kind of like a delayed excitement. Yeah, because I think no one, I mean, we didn't even live together yet. Really? We didn't live together. We're not obviously married or anything. We've been together for four years, but like, you know. Five. Five.

No, he in... 2019? Four years. Thank you so much. I'm really worried that you didn't know math over there. What kind of mics are these? Sorry.

I'm like, okay. Yeah. No more talking. What's the year? Yeah. I literally never know what year it is, though, to be honest. I always put 2022. Are you kidding me, Abby? And it's been 23 for a while. Sometimes I do have to look it up. And stop counting. You know. Stop. 19 plus 4 is 23. Four and a half months, five months. Because we met beginning of...

But wait, hold up. So you weren't living together? Had you lived together before? Yes. Or you had? Yeah, but it was during COVID. We didn't work out. We broke up. It was not good. So long story short, we tried it. It didn't work out. Our relationship was going good. We've obviously had bumps. And I think we're going through a time where we're like, what is going on? Are we going to continue this? Are we on and up? Are we on and down? What's going on? And then we're going through therapy. And then we found out we were pregnant. And then we just decided to... That was a very quick...

Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Full throttle it. Yeah, but just really quick, when we were living together, we had so much outside stuff happen that kind of affected our relationship as well. And we weren't really connecting on a level that we know how to

now that we've like matured and gotten older we were kind of like if one of us was upset we would just stay silent and we would like separate literally in our apartment we would just like not talk to each other for a little bit it was the game room and then there was our room and then i had my best friend living with us too so there was her room okay and he at one point he and just always stayed in that room and i stayed in our room and we didn't even talk and then i would talk with my best friend

And then it was just so bad. Plus COVID. Couldn't leave. COVID happened. His best friend had passed away. Like there was, you know, then the Black Lives Matter and like it was right in front of our apartment. Like there was riots constantly like outside. It was just so much stuff had happened. And I feel like we had forgotten about

our relationship we were just focused on everything else that was happening and it just separated us so bad so it put like a really sour taste in our mouth of like can we ever live together again because like we don't want to go through that and then I started to feel like a little bit you know when we were getting better like maybe we can live together again like maybe that's a thing but you know and then Kian was still a little hesitant on it hence the reason why we were kind of like I think in therapy at that point just trying to like figure out

But everything just like worked out perfectly. I feel like sometimes it's really hard to base a relationship off the beginning phases because you go through so much. And I believe that like, I think for Kian too,

We just know each other so well now and we know how to like communicate in a healthy way. Oh, for sure. And that's something you have to learn to do. Were you guys broken up like still living together and that's why you were in the separate rooms? Or is that just like where you guys were figuring out, okay, how do we move forward right now? Because this is something that you didn't foresee. We like weren't even talking. We just didn't even, we didn't even break up. We were just in this apartment, not talking, not broken up, just like separate. Yeah, we both had like two heart of heads to be like, we should fix this. Yeah, we were just mad at that.

go to bed silent and wake up hoping that one of us was gonna say something and then both of us our egos were like it's just really weird COVID yeah COVID was very it like accentuated a lot and like helped a lot of other things or a lot of relationships for us it did the opposite and I know it did you know the opposite for a lot of different people everyone's different but for us it for sure didn't help typically like there's like a fighter and a flighter like how would you guys describe your relationship in that she's both she's both she

She'll start it and then not finish it. I'm like, dude, what the hell is happening? She'll start it and then she'll stop it. She'll bring something up and then I'm like, well, we gotta talk about this right now. She's like, no. Yeah. She is both.

I've gotten better at that. I used to bring up issues and then he'd be like, he would be like, I want to talk about this right now and fix it. And I'm like, I don't want to be around you right now. Like, I need you to leave me alone. And he couldn't understand that at first. He was like, well, I feel like we shouldn't leave this room until it's fixed. I was like, if you don't leave this room, it will not be fixed because I need my space. And then she, she like, she's so, or maybe not now, but she used to be able to fall asleep like forever.

while being upset. Oh, yeah. And she'd just be like, I don't want to be around you. And just like fall asleep within a minute. I'm like, dude, I'm like laying in bed just thinking. That is me. I'm literally like, Matt, how are you sleeping right now? Like, we are upset. Okay, I'm sorry. We are upset. Wake up. So let me just paint a picture. If it's 3 a.m. and you're not getting along, guess what? If you go to bed when you're no longer tired, it's going to be way easier to resolve. Go to bed when you're no longer tired? Because...

I'm laying there. No, no, no. I'm saying you just go to sleep, right? You get a fresh start. It's a new day. And then you can have a cordial conversation. No raising of voices. I just don't know how to go to sleep. I'm so upset. You can do that now. Right? Yeah, I mean, things change. Now he goes perfectly fine if he's upset.

upset so it sounds like you're the are you the fighter then would you describe yourself as the fighter since you're like let's not leave the room until i just want to make sure back in the day yeah i just want to make sure we're going to bed like in a good mood so we can wake up in a good mood yeah we're in a bad mood my blood is like at a temperature of you boil ramen in it and and she's like let's talk about this tomorrow i'm like dude what ayla i i can't sleep right now that's me i'm

What are you talking about? I just thought this was a female thing. Walks upstairs and you're like, yeah, I can't fall asleep in that mindset. No, because the next day, and then I always kick myself because I'm like, gosh dang it, Abby's still pissed off because of last night. And I'm like, today's a great day. I literally don't even remember what the fight was about last night. Like, this is great. Let's get along. No, I wake up in moods still.

Dude. Okay. Well, basically, okay. I also feel like we're describing things that was like more in the past. For sure. We don't really fight now. Like he annoys me every single day. Get ready for children. But it's not like to the point where we're like, we're not fighting. I'm just like, you're annoying. And he's like, I know. And then we agree. And then we just move on. Like I said, I have two jobs. Yeah.

One of them is to annoy Ayla. He loves it. Sometimes I push buttons, and then by the end of the day, let's say I have 10 buttons I can press, sometimes I like to push that 11th, and then it's just a little extra. That one tips it over? Most of the time, it's like I get to 10, and I know when to stop. You're like, I've reached the point. I'm going to back off. It's like his goal each day to hit the 10th button. She just does like, yeah, she'll give me that little like, and I'm like, yeah.

You're like, that's enough. Yeah. I love pushing our buttons. That's the best. When you guys parted ways, though, did you have any intention of getting back together? The first time I for sure wanted to get back with him, I was like incredibly devastated. I cried almost all the time. I was like, because at first I was like, okay, this is good for us. We both had a healthy talk. We individually came to each other and we're like, this isn't working out. We should probably separate. And we nicely talked about it. There was no fight. We cried. We cried.

And we were just kind of like, it sucks that we love each other, but this isn't working. This is when you were living together. Yeah. And then he moved out. Which helped a lot. Yeah. And I would say after the first two weeks, then when the second week hit, I was like, oh my God, I think I made the biggest mistake ever. I should have fought more. I should have done something. And I think he was still fine because he was kind of like in this phase of being like,

okay like a weight off my shoulder like i'm only have to take care of myself now like i'm figuring out my life and i was like oh my god like he's moving on like i'm crying i'm freaking out i tend to have that effect on people relax so i don't know i mean for me the first time i i knew i wanted to get back together with you 100 same the second time was a little different i think we both had we broke up two times by the way you broke up oh there's a first and a second time

The first one was like, they were both for sure, for sure. But the second time was like, we really thought the second one was for real, for real. Oh, really? Like, F-R, F-R. We thought it was like, for real, we're done. But then that's when I came crying back. And I was like, dude, I need you. There was times where I was supposed to be filming videos and I just could not do it. Like, I would be driving to film a YouTube video with my friend. And I literally specifically one time, I can remember, I got like to his doorstep and

I couldn't get out of the car. I just drove back home. I was like, guys, I can't film today. But yeah, I for sure just came crying back and luckily she took me back. And ever since then, it's like... It just takes time for him to realize how great I am. Were you the one then who was really like, no, we need to break up the second time around and then you realized you made a mistake?

I realize I made a mistake, but it took some time to realize that she's the only one for me. What was that moment? That was the moment going to film the video and you got to the doorstep and you're like, I literally can't do this today because I'm so regretful? That wasn't the moment. That was a big moment, but that wasn't the moment I was like, I need her back. I just think it's kind of like the saying, you know the value of something when you don't...

when it's gone. Yeah. Or like something, something like that. But yeah, I just knew like she was the best thing I've ever had. And how can I let that go? Like I don't see myself with anybody else. I don't want her to be with anybody else. Like I think also since I was, cause the second time I, I was doing fine. Like I kind of was like, I mentally told myself like, this is it. So I like, I fully let myself kind of like move on.

And the first time I didn't. The first time I was obsessed with him, if he called me, I was, hello, just waiting for him. And then I think maybe that was probably a little scary too, was knowing that I was kind of like, okay, well, this one was it.

Right? Well, yeah, but I thought the second one was it too. It just took me a little bit more time. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. It's like a weird thing, but you also needed your own space to kind of figure out your life, you know? Yeah, because I deal with anxiety. I just deal with like generalized anxiety, GAD. I don't know. Yeah, so generalized anxiety is sort of like it can happen anywhere, anytime. It could be a lot, a little. Like it could be...

whatever it's just a lot and then at that point I was like I'm just dealing with so much like I feel like I have to like take care of myself before I can like I have to love myself before I can love someone else and at that point I was just like I felt like mentally I was declining and I had to like let go of stuff and it was sounds so sad now but like I think it helped us in the end that um

that we kind of took that step back and yeah I think it made our bond even stronger and was that like a was that a clean break or did you guys like date in between dating each other or like how how did all that work out between the the two breakups

Like, clean break. Like, did you guys, were you like, okay, we're broken up, but, like, then you'd, like, go see each other or, like, still text each other or I don't know. No, it was, like, it was... We, we, when we break up, we break up. Like, we don't talk. The first time, I feel like we had to talk a little bit because of the dogs and the first one was kind of, like, we still had stuff to deal with because we were, like, we had the same apartment and we had to kind of, like, you know, talk about that stuff. The second one, the second one was, like, a clean break. Like, we didn't talk for...

you know a long time yeah until how long was that if you don't mind me asking it's like two three months it was three months right i was gonna say six what the second time it was a long months it was a lot a lot of months it was like three months three it felt like longer for him it was like three months yeah and we were just forever without you clean break this episode is sponsored by caraway homes

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your next purchase. This deal is exclusive for our listeners. So visit carawayhome.com slash unplanned or use code unplanned, all caps, at checkout. Caraway non-toxic cookware made modern. Wait, I'm actually curious just to, I wanted to ask you guys, have you guys ever broken up? We actually didn't. We never, we actually never did. How long have you been together? So you guys have like stuck it out, like high school. 17 and 18 is when we went on our first date.

Okay. If you don't mind me asking, how old are you guys now? 25 and 24. Yeah, 24 and 25. So you guys have been together, do the math thing. Seven years. Wait, no, we should have let you do the math. Sorry, that's not nice. I don't like it when people have me do math. 18 to 25, boom, nine years. I'm just like, I, I, stop. We're just,

I am like just always, you know, because sometimes, you know, for us, breakups, our breakups were so necessary in our relationship because we really needed to figure out each other. We needed to figure out ourselves individually and we still had a lot to work on. He needed to work on, you know,

That's me. Like he said himself, his work, his anxiety. I honestly feel like I worked on being more understand, like letting my ego go with our relationship. I was way more like, I feel like I was kind of hard headed in the beginning. Um,

I understand him now. Like, I know when he needs space. It's not like he's mad. He just needs to be like... It's not personal. It's like... Yeah. You have to... You have to like kind of realize that... Like, we're separate people. Although we're together, we're separate people and we have our own separate needs, our own separate desires and this and this and this. So like...

I just, I've, I've kind of made it a thing where like I separate my anxiety now and she's so like amazing that she knows when I have anxiety, it's not about her. It's not, not about her, but it's not against her. I don't have anxiety because of her. It, she's not the problem. Nothing's a problem. It's me if anything, but you know, she's just so great when it comes down to like just giving me my time and you know,

letting me deal with it by myself because I hate for my anxiety if I'm with anybody it makes it so much worse I have to be by myself I lock myself in a room by myself I feel like trying to talk to him or like calm him down or whatever it makes it worse you just gotta like kinda let him do his thing and then you just let him know you're there but like don't don't like try to be like what can I do is he like

I can relate to that though because sometimes Abby like she can tell if I'm really anxious yeah get really quiet oh yeah people don't notice but she knows it's not you're quiet it's a literally I can tell by if I look you in the eyes I can tell when you're going like what am I eyeballs do like is it a look it's like you just go cross-eyed and you can't yeah but you know you're like are you I'm like shut up Abby I'm like I'm working through it dude like stop asking me about my anxiety I would want to talk

it out I'm trying to fake it till I make it baby I'm trying to like actually I don't have it if you're sick if you're like sick sick and someone goes up there like you don't look so good you're like you're making it like you're making it worse thank you for like realizing but they're like oh do you need something like I can go to the store for you do you need you're like just leave me alone like I feel like crap anxiety is the same thing for me if she's like oh my god are you okay like

are you freaking out? Is your heart beating really fast? And you can't, like, I'm like, dude, I'm like, what? No, just, I just learned, like, I just need to be alone.

I had a friend, which, by the way, I don't know if you've done this, but I still have yet to talk to a therapist about anxiety or get on medication or whatever. But it got better after. That's why I was interested in what you said about your anxiety journey. Because with me, for whatever reason, being with Abby really helped. I felt like I could just totally be vulnerable with somebody. But not talking about it.

Oh, yeah. Just being around. Just being there. I think just falling in love took me out of that. For sure. It was able to transport me out of that dark place because I used to be up late at night with a lot of pressure in my chest and couldn't sleep in high school and stuff. And I didn't tell anybody because I didn't want to seem vulnerable or weak. Opening up is the best medicine. Yeah. I've taken medicine and I've talked to therapists. I hate anxiety, so I've done everything I could possibly do to not –

to cope with it. And just opening up is the best thing I've ever done. It's the best medicine. Especially as like selfish as it sounds,

hearing that other people have anxiety like I do, like I don't wish it upon anybody. Yeah. But hearing that people struggle with it, um, how I do just makes me feel like I'm not alone. It makes me feel good. And like, we talk about our struggles and like how we cope with them differently. And like, dude, try this. Yeah. If it doesn't work, Oh, you should try this. Like, yeah. Yeah. Cause a buddy told me he was like, uh,

a therapist told my friend that if he just like looks anxiety in the face, so to speak, and is like, hi, anxiety, hello, like acknowledge that it's there, but don't give it any energy. Yeah. He was like, that really helped me. And like that, that helped me too. Cause I think a lot of times it's like, I tried to try to be the macho, like nothing, nothing can stop me. I'm like, I love this. Like you try to just like,

through it and then it's worse. Like you're like giving it energy. Yeah, you could do it for a little bit but you know, it's there and you can't make it go away just by like being a tough man or whatever. You gotta deal with it so I think like not giving it the energy or just like looking it dead in the face and just being like, you know, I know you're there but you're not. I feel like it's even hard as a partner sometimes. Like I don't know if you've ever felt this way but like,

it was really hard for me to learn how to navigate around his anxiety because you know initially you think if someone's going through anxiety what should I do I should like be

be there for them ask them if i can help try to like do something to comfort them and it was just so hard because everyone's anxiety is so different so it's like i had to learn that that's not necessarily what he wants he wants to know that i'm there and if he needs me i'm around but like just being too invasive or trying to like do what the what can i get you like do you need something like can i scratch your back can i do all these things it was just like i will always take that

Okay, well, the scratching back... Even... No, I will always take that. Whoa, whoa, whoa. He'll take it unless he's feeling hot. Then he'll be like, don't touch me. Oh, I hate being hot. Yeah, but... I don't know. I feel like...

I always used to take it as like, you just don't love me. Like, you just don't want me around. Like, like if, if you're feeling stressed, you should want the person you want, like you love to be next to you, to be like helping you. And I, I like learned over time that it has nothing to do with me or anyone else. It's,

severely just like his brain and like his emotions trying to like fight each other to calm down but it's like this what's like how you said like you want to do nothing but help me right but that was too much for you and I used to think you didn't like I used to be like okay you just don't like you don't like you're mad at me you don't love me like whatever

whatever. And then we have a moment right now. I know. Yeah. And then I realized like, okay, wait, it's not me. Cause help comes in different shapes and forms. Like you said, you want to help me. You are helping me way more by not doing what you want to do. I know. So help just comes in like, yeah. And you have helped me like more than you'll ever know.

That's so sweet. You know what I mean? Yeah. That's really, really precious. I mean, yeah, you've helped more than you've ever known. If, like, when you just take a step back and kind of, like, hear how other people, like, work or, like, yeah, she's, you know, she's like my rock. Do you, okay, so, like, that is really, really sweet. I might cry. Me too.

Me too. I might tear up a little bit. Look at me. I might. Don't do it, Ken. I might. I think it's all this water I'm drinking. It's just coming out of your eyes now. It's overflowing into my eyes. He gets emotional. When you isolate yourself and kind of go off to deal with it on your own, do you meditate? Do you go to work as an escape? Is there something that you do that helps you?

calm your nerves and helps you fight through it. I mean, the word escape is just, like, the best thing in the world. Like, everything I do is an escape, so... I mean, it just...

It depends, really. If I play a game, it'll make me feel better. If I go in and if I can just take my mind off of whatever's going on, whatever I do, it just helps. So if I'm in a room alone with no one saying, what do you need? Do you need anything? Are you good? Are you good? If I'm just in a room alone playing a game, reading a book, texting my friends...

I don't know. It's just something about being alone. So it's nothing specific, I guess. And do you guys think – because I noticed you were saying, yeah, we needed – like with the first breakup, you were like, you know, that'll happen. And I was curious, did you think – did you like move in together too soon or –

Yeah, I guess that's the question. We could have. Honestly, I don't know if it was that we did it too soon. We'd been together for about a year already, maybe a little bit over a year. And we felt like we were ready. I feel like it was time. Maybe we could have waited a little bit longer. I also think it was just, you know, the situation. I also had my best friend come live with us, so it wasn't like we were getting the, you know...

him and I moving in on a place together it was like we also had another person so there was there was and then my sister came to live with us I just feel like there was so many things like I was I kept saying so many outside things that happened that like really just affected our relationship and instead of us being mature about it and looking at it as like okay we are not the problem it's all these other things let's try to like come together and like really work on us

we let everything affect it and then we just were like we don't work i think a therapist told us like was it a therapist maybe that you want the problem i'm not the problem the problem is here and we're fighting towards like the resolution we're fighting together against the problem but in my head we were the problem yeah i was either wrong or you were wrong or there's something wrong with how you think or something wrong i think but like

In, you know, in reality, it's not how we think. It's like we have to kind of come together and work together on like getting this issue out of the way. But for the longest time, it was either I'm the problem or she's the problem. And it was just hard to navigate that. We're also very different people. Like we are. Mucho diferente. Completely opposite. Like he is introverted, a homebody. I like to party. Yeah, on Fortnite. Like, oh,

alone in that room. That's crazy. That's crazy. I feel like you guys would be fun. That is crazy. That's fighting words. You, yeah. Do you play Minecraft? I don't. So there's a couple big games that like everyone talks about that I just haven't gotten into yet. Really? Okay.

Please don't get him into it. Okay, I don't know. I would still play it today. I think it's so much fun. But when I was in seventh grade, me and my buddies would Skype and play Minecraft. Oh, Skype. That's so late. It was so much fun. That brought me back, bro. Whoa. Skyping with your buddies while you're gaming. Yeah. Now it's a thing called Discord. Oh, I've heard of Discord. Yeah, Discord. I love that you said you've heard of it. This man doesn't even know what this is. I don't game. I'm not a gamer. Don't get into it. Don't get into it. It's like Skype. It'll take over your life.

And then it'll take over your life. I could use a little bit more alone time, to be honest. Well, you'll find this out really soon. When you're a dad, you just don't have time. That's what I'm saying. I think – well, actually, Noah, you have time for whatever you make time for. So like obviously being in – That's good, actually. Thank you, baby. I like that. That's on the podcast. We repeat that again. Yeah, Matt. How are you going to manage your time differently now? How are you going to manage your time? Yeah, let us know. No, but all I'm saying is, yeah, you – whatever you make time for, you have for –

That did not sound – That was better the first time. Let's cut that out. I'm just kidding. We can keep it in. We want to be like real relatable, you know? So – Oh, Matthew. I'm going to stop. Oh, we got the whole name right there too. Matthew James. Oh, Matthew. He calls me Matthew James whenever I say something. Matthew James when it's like – when it's bad. Yeah.

No, but like when you're a dad, it just sucks up so much of your time. But you can still find pockets of, you know, pockets of joy in the things that you did before becoming a dad. But it's just not like you can't do it all, right? You don't have all the time in the world now. You have to be selective. So like if you want to game, you can still game. But like maybe if you also would like skateboard and I don't know what else you like to do. Baby wear while you have baby.

like have that's true so i'm like i'm making music now he will he'll he'll make sure he can find a way to get on that computer no actually that's you can totally double like multitask because i'll write songs and hop on a call with the producer and like make music because i'm trying to like make music and grow following on spotify and i'm like baby and i'm like where during these calls dude i'm like on like a three-hour song right and i'm just like rocking my kid and then like my other son will come in and be like what

"Ah, Dad!" And then like I'll pick him up and I'm like still like trying to write songs. It's distracting but it's also really fun. You're making me feel like I can shred seven hours of Fortnite with a kid attached to me. You could! Oh well, that's not the point of this podcast. Wait, I'm still so curious. How did you get from the point of like you're broken up, you get back together, then to the baby conversation? 'Cause you said like this was like something you were talking about before. It's just like a lot of time-- Did I cut you off? Sorry.

no i didn't even say anything i was i was you know me i heard the beginning of it instantly start talking she had a thought yeah she's like dibs no go ahead you can say your piece and then i'll figure out if i need to butt in honestly it's just time like there's so much time that passes we've been together for four years i want to say five um a lot a lot of time has passed and like we realized like we're both humans we're both adults we go through things it's like

There was just a lot of time that passed and I've realized my love for her has just grown so much and we want to continue that and I guess spread it. Yeah, there wasn't necessarily a specific...

talk of being like hey we should talk and like figure out do we want kids it was more of like we've always wanted them actually well we yeah we both want kids but we were never thinking like okay let's do it at this time at this age or whatever and it was like it was more of i had a scare i thought i was pregnant and then we were in the car heading to the store to get a pregnancy test and see if i was pregnant or just bloated and turns out i was just bloated but um

Kian was like I remember we were in the car and he was like I think it'd be kind of cool if you were pregnant and I was like wait what? that's so sweet and he's like yeah I think it'd be kind of cool if you were pregnant he's like I feel like we're romantic he's like I feel like we're

You didn't say cool, but you said something similar. Yeah. Dope. Sick. That'd be sick if we had a kid. Yeah. It wasn't something like that. It was kind of just like, we've talked about it. Like, we've both wanted kids for so long. And we've both wanted to kind of like move in together and start our lives. Like, not just us. We wanted like a little diary of things. Oh, yeah. He also told me I can't. That I have to be pregnant. We're going to live together.

What? No, let's not put that out there. I'm kidding. No. But we basically were like so... We were more... It was funny because we were more on board with having a baby than the thought of moving in together. Well, just because the sour taste from... Isn't that random? That's hilarious. Isn't that weird? COVID just like ruined it for me, bruh. It was just very weird. I was like, I just don't know if we could do it again. No, we did it again. It's been absolutely the best. It's been seamless. So how pregnant were you when you guys moved back in together?

Four months? Three months? I would say... I'm bad with timelines. I would say it was like three and a half months. Oh, okay. Three and a half months I was pregnant. Wow. And then we moved in together because I still had to like get rid of... I had to end my lease and then I wanted to move in. I was able to get out of my lease a month early because my landlord was really sweet and was kind of like, I get it. You're pregnant. We'll get you out. So I was able to do that but...

It's just so funny how we had so much anxiety and we were stressed. Like, is this going to work? And then when we just did it, it's like, I don't know. It's just been so... I mean, it's building back up, though, because the baby's almost here. It's going to hit you so hard. It's the best, though. We...

just got done with our baby room. Yeah, we just finished. Less than a week ago. That was so much stress for me. I don't know if you guys had stress dealing with that, but like, we don't really have much of a baby room. Oh, okay. Our second baby has no room. I was going to say, your first one you did though, right? The first one you were like, we put it together the last like week or so, but they don't sleep in their own room. That's what we're thinking. We're right there. But I was stressed out

about it it was the nesting thing though dude it's a motherly instinct totally hormonal because abby was like so anxious to get the baby room set up and randomly one day we got this feature wall done we like paid this guy to like make this nice feature wall and we like made this fun theme and it was ready we're like not planners that's why this is called the unplanned podcast we're like horrible about like we're a mess i thought it was because the baby was unplanned

Yeah, it's all of the above. It's just you guys as a whole. We're just a mess. We're just a mess. We're a mess. But we got this done early, right? Because of the nesting phase. Honestly, Matt, let's be real. I'm pretty sure the only reason that you kicked it into gear at the very end is because you wanted to make a nursery tour on YouTube. Actually, that is not true. What?

actually no I'm not even kidding that's also in my mind too but yeah for our second kid though like this is just totally stereotypical second child we literally his room is our closet

We don't have a room for him. I feel like that makes sense because what everyone's been telling us is it's really fun to get the baby's room ready and you'll probably use it sometimes when you're wanting to sit in the rocking chair and maybe for feedings. But realistically, this baby will be in your room the whole time. So I'm kind of like... You think Octomom did it eight times? Oh my gosh. Yeah.

She has a 10-bedroom house. A new theme. Every kid. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. Jeez. Too much. That's so funny. I don't know how the people, especially like, I always thought it'd be fun to have twins. Like before we actually thought. He said that too. And it was like, this would be so sick. And then you have a kid. And then you're like, bro, twins would be a nightmare. Happens every time. That'd be so hard. First time. I would still love to have twins. But we don't have a boy yet. So I'm not in that stage. But I just, one is so big.

Like, already? Like, I'm so... If she had two in there? Yeah, I would be scared. Are you uncomfortable? I wanted to ask, yeah. How has your pregnancy been? My pregnancy has been... You know, in the beginning, I was a little... I think in the beginning, if we lived together, I might have been a little bit less stressed. Because I think us not living together was stressed on me. Because emotionally, like, I needed Key in there all the time. And he wasn't. Because, like, he was in his house. I'm so clean when I'm pregnant. Yeah. And...

We also were dealing with like kind of a dog situation. He had gotten his old dog back and our dog was living at my place and his dog was at his place and they didn't get along. So I wasn't even going there a lot because I was like trying to separate them. So for the first like couple weeks, like months. Speed bumps. I was like tired.

Not eating because everything made me feel like gross except for applesauce and bread and cereal. And your weird pickle juice ramen tuna fish sandwich. You have weird cravings? Explain this pregnancy craving. They'll smelt the whole house out while they do. That's before I was pregnant. I have this weird thing I eat and it's even before I was pregnant. It's basically like. It soaks bread in pickle juice and smears tuna on it. No, I don't. What are you saying? You're making this up. What is it?

You should know. Pickle juice, tuna, bread, ramen. There's no bread. Okay. It's basically... I make ramen and then I take tuna out of a can and I put it in a bowl with mayo, pickle juice, everything seasoning and...

Parmesan cheese. Mayo and pickle juice. Those are Matt's worst food. I mix it up and then I add it to my ramen. So it's like a sauce on your noodles? It's like a tuna salad almost on my noodles without the lettuce. Is this canned tuna though? Yeah. Oh no. I actually like tuna but like canned tuna there's just something about that flavor. I don't know. I love it. There's like a film on top of brown and it's like pink and she's like ooh yummy. I gotta have all of it. Stop.

Did you get any weird cravings though? No. I always kind of wanted one because you see them on the movies. I'm like, I wonder what I'm going to crave. I like craved Taco Bell. Like nothing. Oh yeah, I don't have any weird cravings. The only thing that's been so incredibly different for me is like I never cared for sugar ever. Like people would eat pastries in front of me or cakes and things. I'd be like, yeah, okay, I'll take a bite. But like I don't really want it.

Oh my gosh, the second I got pregnant, sugar became God's gift to this earth. - So did you think you were having a girl then? - I did. I was like, okay, I'm craving sugar so much. Like I always want something sweet and I never wanted that.

and he's a boy, but you know. At one point, excuse me, so many people, not so many, like three or four would look and be like, you're having a boy. Oh yeah. What? They instantly knew. It's crazy. I didn't know that was a thing. Yeah. Like three or four people that we had, like we hired someone to do something for our baby room. And he's like, he's like, uh, my wife, I'm going to, I'm going to ask my wife what she thinks because she can tell. And then I guess, did you take a picture or FaceTime or something? Maybe, I don't know. She's like, he sits,

it's sitting high so she thinks it's a boy. And then other people would be like, it's a boy. Everyone knew. There wasn't one person who told me I was having a girl. They were like, it's a boy. So weird. And I was like, I didn't know that wives tale is like true. I thought it was just like one of those things where. See, I don't actually think it is though because I had two boys and I carried them totally different. Really? Yeah. Maybe it's a vibe you're giving off. Maybe. I don't know. Yeah.

Actually, we did have a psychic tell us we were having a boy that was going to have blue eyes. Yeah. And our son had blue eyes. Yeah.

And neither one of us had blue eyes. I honestly get scared to go to Psychic. I didn't go to one. I was at Disney World. We were just at Disney World and we met this girl. She's on the bus with us. She was very nice on the bus with us and she just told us like... She's like, you're going to have a boy with blue eyes. We're like, funny. And we're like, that's funny because I have dark brown eyes. Yeah, brown eyes. I have green hazel eyes. Neither one of us has blue eyes. Yeah, he does. What are yours? Did you just ask what mine are? Like dark, dark or like hazel. Oh my gosh, Kian. Kian, tell me...

your girlfriend's eyes eye color right now. I just told him. Oh, you know what? I do know one thing. She does have dark eyes, but she wears contacts that are a little tinted. All right, see, I didn't want to speak anymore. See you later. because we want to do a YouTube video

She instantly cuts me off when I get it right. She's like, wait. No, we're going to do a YouTube video after this podcast, and it's who knows their partner better, unmarried or married, and he's already failing at just my eye color. You wear colored contacts. No, but it's not like it's, I have brown eyes, Kian. It's just the outer part of it. Take those contacts out. I can't.

She has dark brown, but she wears like a little... He's like, I'm going to fact check this. Yeah, she wears like little tinted... Like a little tint. Little tinted. It's basically brown contacts for brown eyes. Okay. It's a weird thing. I saw it... So I've had contacts my whole life. Not my whole life. Since I was like 14, 15. And one time I went into my... Like...

optometrist and they were like oh we have these new contacts they're like if you they basically enhance your color and I was like that's cool like I want to try that so I did and I got these contacts that they're brown contacts for brown eyes

And Kian's like, well, maybe you don't have brown eyes. She has brown eyes. So if we had a baby that had blue eyes. It could happen. My dad has the bluest eyes in the entire world. Like they're like this blue. It's funny looking at Kian's eyes right now. I'm like, I can't even make out your eye color. Like your eyes look almost black. I don't have any pupils. It's just one big pupil. I've been told that too. I don't even see your pupils. Really? I don't. Really? I can see. There's like a little dot in your eyeball. I can see that. Do it towards the camera. There's no way.

Can you see that I'm freaking out now? I don't have any pupils. Yeah, yours are dark, but I just feel like mine are like midnight. Yours are like a 738. Yeah, mine are like, oh my God, I might not have any pupils. Do people always ask you guys when you're getting married? Yes. Oh, especially now. Especially now that you have a baby? Like comments and stuff. Is that why you hesitated a little bit when I was like, how did your family react? Because like, was anybody in your family like one of you guys to like get married before you had kids? My mom is not before. Well,

I feel like my mom, the second she found out we were pregnant, she's like, you're going to get married, right? And we were like, no. And then she kind of was like, you have to get married. But her reasoning was more because she wanted us to be on insurance together. For like tax reasons. And I was like, I don't want to get like not forced into marriage, right? Like I just don't want to get married for the wrong reasons. Like, oh, it's going to save us a lot of... I feel like we should stop saying that. What were you thinking? We should stop saying for the wrong reasons because it's not like we're...

holding off on marriage because it's wrong. I know, but having someone be like, you should get married now because you have a son. You should get married because tax benefits. I was like, well, I'm not getting married. We didn't want to be pressured into something that we didn't agree on. This is my wife. She saves money on taxes with me.

You guys do live in the state of California, which I'm pretty sure has some of the highest stats in the country. I know. So the marriage thing... And then with my parents, they split when I was eight. Love my parents. They can be in the same room now and they're great, but they split. I don't have any great memories of my parents being married and it being this great grand thing. I don't know. My parents started going through a split recently. I mean, they're back together now, but it was kind of like they were literally...

inches away from signing divorce papers. But then they decided to like work it out. So I think for us, I was telling him too, it's kind of like lately and I might just be because I'm pregnant. I've been feeling more of, and I don't know how to explain it, but this is the best way I can do it is I'm not in this need to get like married right now, sign paperwork and be like, this is it. The deed is done. We're officially together.

But it's hard for me to tell people like, oh, my boyfriend, because to me now that we're having a baby together, he's more to me than my boyfriend. Yeah. He's not someone that like I would easily just let out of my life or call it quits. Like I would we would work on it. We would we would fight for our relationship. We would like, you know, we're in a more committed relationship.

I'm baby daddy now. Yeah, but I don't want to call you baby daddy. That sounds so terrible. You need a baby daddy t-shirt. You're my girlfriend and baby mama. So I told him recently that I want to be engaged for the rest of my life. That's sweet. Oh, that would be so cute. And now he's like, so you're going to break my bank account? No, she wants a ring. And every morning I wake up. Oh, you want the ring now. Every morning I wake up, I can't breathe. She's like, I'm not.

So look at this cute one I was talking about. She even got a fake ring for a video. Yeah, she's... That's so funny. She's in my grill. Here's the thing. When we got married, so like we were young, right? So like we didn't have any money. I'm not even wearing mine right now. Oh my, you're not wearing your ring? I'm actually wearing a silicone ring. The ring... I've heard a lot of good things about that. We had no money. So the ring that I got Abby was, it wasn't a real diamond. It was moissanite, which is actually more ethical than...

I actually love those ones, which is weird because they're shinier. They're so brilliant. It's very sparkly. I love them. And she picked it out as the first one she saw in the store. It was like boyfriends. He was the first boyfriend I had. So I picked him in the same ring. I just didn't want to waste my time. My point is when you said breaking the bank, you could get a ring for $5. Literally, my ring is $5. I want everyone to know on the podcast, I told him that it can be super fake.

I want to do a brand deal for a ring. Give me a ring. Do a brand deal. I don't even care. Just get me one. Do a brand deal. I don't even care. I'll do a brand deal. I'll be like, look, I got this. I just have to promote it. That's fine. Put it on. And now, thank you so much to K Jewelers for sponsoring my wife. Or whatever. I love when he messes up. It's so cute. Honestly, though, K Jewelers. Or my fiance. Baby mama.

mama remember baby mama honestly though i we've actually done a brandy with kid rulers and they were really easy to work with so if you if you work with them that would be maybe as a push as a push present wait as a push present you propose it's either that all of this pressure only makes him go arthur and not doing it let me tell you oh it has to be his idea yeah it's either that or a golf cart

I've recently been thinking a golf cart sounds great. Wouldn't a golf cart be great for both of us? We can only ride it in our neighborhood. There's literally, you can't go out into the street. 7-Eleven.

Wait, bro, Slurpees? You get 7-Eleven Slurpees? Oh, that was a craving for her. I love them. That was a craving for her for a little bit. When we lived in Hawaii, there was a 7-Eleven a minute from our house, and I would go all the time. It's just unsafe to live that close to a 7-Eleven. Like, I... Oh, my God, 7-Eleven. All the possibilities are endless. Did they have sushi? Wait, did they have sushi at your 7-Eleven? I don't know.

Ew, there's no way you guys beat that sushi. Oh, I like their sushi. I can't do that. No way. Guys, come on. You're telling me you actually ate the sushi at 7-Eleven? Yes, of course. We'll eat anything. We really will eat anything. We did a whole video eating only 7-Eleven for 24 hours, and then our camera wasn't working, so we had to refilm the whole thing. No audio for the whole thing. Yeah, we didn't have audio in the first video, so we had to film that video two times. So we ate all that just for... What was the worst thing you had? Oh, man. Did your stomach just, like, kill you after? Yes, but there is good stuff, though. You have to just... You have to know how to look for it.

Like, what about the roller taquito thing? Yeah. They're chicken wings. Oh, man. Okay, the taquito's not bad, honestly. I don't know if it tastes bad. That's my guilty pleasure. I just imagine my stomach hating me after for it. Yeah, that does definitely. Yeah, that's what I'd be scared of. Okay, we're getting off the subject. Proposing, okay? So you, but this has to be your idea. No, you can't talk about it because then he's not. Oh, shoot. Shutting down. We are shutting down. He just powered off. Power off the podcast. Sorry, I can't power back on for this.

See, we did things as traditionally as you could do it. Really? We literally didn't live together until we got married. Okay. We are so opposite compared to them. We waited two years. We got pregnant and then moved in together. I feel like maybe...

like maybe because you're in LA it's a little different but especially like where we're from in the Midwest like do you feel like people being like questioning you even here absolutely really I'm not here but like not even my family but I just know like the traditional route the traditional route of like

There's kind of like... Not a checklist, but there's kind of like steps to do it in. And we skip steps and we're doing, you know, step number seven and step number one, like switch. We're just doing it kind of almost backwards. And for sure, it's not like the traditional way or the right way to do things. So we're for sure getting like asked and like...

Is marriage coming up? But it is kind of cool that we can show people that even if it's not the traditional way, everyone is different. And we are making... It's working. Totally. We're still doing great. You know? And like... Go team. That hurt. Well, you punched me in the back of your wrist. But it's worked for us. And I mean... Yeah, the only thing that Kian still has to do is take your time. But eventually...

You think wedding is down the road? Not even a wedding. Just marriage. I just want to be engaged. I'll get you a ring. Oh, just engaged. I just want something more than we're boyfriend, girlfriend. I want something that's like... Yeah. I'll get you a ring. You get me a golf cart. Fine. That would be awesome. That's untraditional, but what if I agree to that? Great compromise, everybody. I mean, really? Really?

You're also putting on a ring too though. What? Really? You are putting one on. Yeah, because you know what? You have to propose to me then. Hey, try this one on. Yeah, you have to. Whoa, I'm going to be married to Abby? It's silicone. Yeah, I like that one because it's not uncomfy. That looks good on you. It's silicone. I actually... Does that make you feel some type of way? I just love seeing it because like it's just, I don't know. Are you like scared of the idea of marriage? Of commitment? Of like...

Or does it just feel too formal? I get scared of like... I'm just kind of a realistic person in the sense that

I love him so much and I want to be with him forever. But like, what if that's not true? Like, what if we... Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. It's so hard. Like, I just get... Because then I watched my parents. My parents were together for 30 years and they literally wanted to do a divorce. That's why they call it the big question because it's a big thing. And what's sad is like people that...

This sounds so sad. But people that get divorced, like, they never got married thinking they would divorce one day. Right? You don't get married to be like, ooh, one day we're going to divorce. They obviously meant it. They obviously, like, were fully in on that. So it's sad that, like, that happens. But I don't know. I think, like, even the people that it does happen to, I would...

Maybe I'm wrong, but I would probably say that most of them probably would say that they made the best decision they did in that moment. Yeah. And maybe they learned or something. 100%. Maybe things went south, but I don't know. You just... You make so many decisions in life...

With so many unknowns and hindsight is 20-20, but you don't know what the freak you're doing when you're just figuring it out. My dad not always told me, but for sure has told me multiple times. I don't know if it's a good thing to tell your son, but he had always told me my dad's very not traditional. He's always said, do you know what the number one leading cause of divorce is? I was like, oh my God, that's a huge question. I will hear you need you want to never do it.

He's like, what's the leading cause of divorce? And I was like, I don't know. Cheating? He's like, marriage. And I was like, oh, okay. His dad is... Yeah, we should not talk about what your dad has told you. Love my dad, but... Your dad is amazing and he's so funny, but he's very against traditional life. There's not a good... He got married and had three beautiful... Five beautiful kids. Like, loved...

my mom for 13 years like it was great but now I feel like when you talk to him he would just say how you know because he's his own person and he's getting older but like there's no perfectly painted picture for me yeah I have to paint something myself so it's like it's kind of hard making these decisions based off of

Like me making my own decisions and like, I don't know. It's just scary. It's a scary world road to navigate. It's, it's crazy. Abby shared this TikTok with me like a couple of years ago and I, it really, I don't know. It really, uh,

I love it. And what it said is like being single is hard and being married is hard. So choose your heart. Or maybe it was more about like about like maybe it's not fitness. I don't know. Maybe it was like we're like, you know, working out every day is really hard. And also like being overweight is hard. So choose your heart. And so it's like life is hard no matter what. Yeah. So you have to just choose one. Like you pick your struggle. That's the thing about life is unfortunately, no matter what your circumstances are,

rich or poor or I don't know like whatever situation you're in like there's going it's going to be hard and so you just get to choose that but and we're like also we're very you know and you can agree to this too it's not like we are 100% never gonna get married like we've always said we might change our mind down the line huh

B. Okay, yeah. Kian's like, no. Just kidding. No. It's a joke. We really, like, we've always said if something changes down the line, it changes down the line. Obviously, my mind has changed a little bit differently. I'm still scared to get fully married and, like, sign paperwork and do all that stuff. I want to show people more that we're, like, committed in a way that, you know, that's why I want the engagement. But...

I think it's just because we've been, we've seen stuff from our families. So like, have you guys, are your parents both together married? Yeah. So you guys had that upbringing knowing that it can work. Yeah. You know, for you, I think, didn't you say your parents even tried again and it still didn't work?

Yeah, so it's kind of like he saw it twice and then he's like, it just doesn't work. So why would I put myself in that situation? How about before an engagement ring, I get you a mood ring so I know how you're feeling. If they could actually get a mood ring that works for a husband to know or...

Have you gotten better at deciphering what she actually means? Because Abby all the time will say one thing and she means another thing. We've been together for seven years. I still can't figure her out half the time. You act like it's so hard. But then we discovered it was recently just playing with my hair. He just ignores it. He knows exactly what I'm feeling and he just is like, yeah, okay. He goes back to the stream room.

I just feel like I know Ayla too well. She knows me too well. So at this point, that's why I think we don't fight anymore. Like argue because we just know. What is the secret to not fighting anymore? We know what it's serious or not. I truthfully just don't feel like I'm kind of just tired. Like that's

Realistically, I don't want to fight with him. There's a lot of times when my friends will be like, I'll say something about what Kian did and they're like, what? Yeah, sorry. I'll say something about what Kian did and they're like, oh my God, how do you not want to rip his head off? You know what? I'm like, honestly, I just don't. I don't know. That is the common theme I've seen among all couples that have been married over 50 years.

Matt, what does a husband always say to you? Happy wife, happy life. Dude, I swear. Well, it rhymes with husband. Happy husband, happy life. There's nothing for us. He wants her to be about him. We don't get nothing. I'm going to cry again. We don't get anything. It's funny. I tell him all the time. I'm like, you're so lucky to have me because I don't

I don't get mad. And I voice that a lot. I'm very lucky to have Ayla. I don't get mad a lot of times. And he's also so funny, which is really annoying because I laugh a lot. Wait, give me a compliment and then take it away. He's so funny. So like when he does something bad, I'm laughing because he starts being funny. And then he's like, see, I made you laugh. Everything's good. And then he goes back to the stream room. He's like, we're good. Okay, bye. And then he leaves me because I'm like happy, but I'm not.

You keep talking about streaming. I'm like, I want to try a stream with you. No. I'm so curious. I need to stop saying it. Because I suck at video games. It's so fun. People would make fun of me so much because I'd be horrible. Like, I probably am the worst video game player in the world. There's only one way to get better. No, man. I'm worse than you. Play nonstop. Abby's... No. Okay, if we're playing Mario Kart on the Wii, that actually is one game that we love to play Mario Kart together. I smashed that game. She's so good. But the Wii remote, Abby is so good at like using it and tilting it. No, man. No one plays Wii anymore except for...

For you with your cousins. I do Switch. Not Wii. We play on the Wii. We do Switch sometimes. She plays... She likes it on the Wii. I don't know any of these things. You play on the Wii? That came out like 2008. That's why we really don't play video games. Oh, you guys are like parents. They're like playing...

old game. The Wii. Get out our Atari, everyone. Guitar Hero, was that what you said? No. Guitar Hero is so fun. I loved Guitar Hero. That's the only game I could actually use to play. I had Rock Band as a kid. We got it for Christmas and then me and my two brothers, we like, one person took the drums, one person took bass, and one person took guitar. Also, don't hate me, but I've been, I have to pee. She has to pee. I have to pee too, so bad. You guys go pee. I have to pee more

Sorry to interrupt your schedule on programming, but we do have something to share with you guys. Speaking of share. We would like you to share this podcast with your mother. And I want you to share it with the 26th person in your contacts list. Yeah. Wow. I would like you to share it with your fur friend. Your furry friend? Your furry friend. Nice. Your hamster. Why did I? I just like. Ayla, close up. Close up. The person.

The person in the McDonald's drive-thru line. Dude, that'd be funny. Like, what if instead of, you know, doing what we do, which is like order what the people in front of us order, because we like make that video all over, like all the time. What if it's just like, I'm going to shout back to the person behind me. Go follow. You know what? Share it with, when you go to order Postmates next time or DoorDash and it says leave a note, share it. Put the link in there. That's very specific.

share the podcast plug the link of the podcast in there plug the link because we people need to hear these like awesome conversations that we're having about relationships and dating and getting married everybody goes through this at some point in their life whether they make the decision you know to to actually get married or not they will be thinking about this at some point share the podcast now back to the episode

We are now officially back. Yeah. So something I could totally relate to you on the opposite end of like the whole marriage thing is you guys were saying you felt all this pressure like to get married and are still feeling that. And I felt the opposite of like pressure not to get married because when we were young and like 19 and 20 engaged, we were like,

People were like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Like, why are you doing this? Like, it's funny. Because it's so young. Yeah. The manager at the pizza restaurant that we worked at was like, you guys should just move in together first and not get married and just like see if it works out. And we were like, well, we don't want to do that. Matt was way more hesitant when it was like time for us to talk about like starting a family than it was for him to get married. Like he was like, oh, yes, yes.

I was all in. So it's like the opposite. Yeah, we're flipped. I know, we're so flipped. I was all in on Abby, but then it was like, whoa, we're bringing other kids into this world. These are individuals that don't even exist yet. I knew I wanted to be a dad, but we became parents pretty young, I would say, compared to most people. And so for you guys, why? And all the responsibility is yours. Yes. Nobody else's. It's yours. Yeah. And so I guess my question is, what is it? Why?

why did you guys feel more comfortable with having kids before, uh, before marriage? Cause like for me, it was the exact opposite. Well, for the marriage part, there's nothing in the world that can, it's gonna sound so cheesy. Oh gosh. Make me love, make me love her more. Like, Oh, I was really scared. This was going to go a bad way. There's nothing that can be like, there's nothing that can like make me love her more. Like,

prove to her that like I don't feel like I don't I don't feel like I have to prove my love to her like I love her with all my heart and like

The kids thing I felt like was so easy. Not so easy, but it's like I already know I love her and there's nobody else I would want to like start a family with. So I just knew that was going to be with her. And I was I felt comfortable. She makes it so easy to be like to like want to start a family with. She's so caring. And like ever since I've known her, like the main thing she's always said she wanted to be was like everything.

A mom, right? Yeah. Yeah, every time someone asks you, like, what did you want to be when you grew up? You just always say a mom. A mom. So, yeah. I think also... I'm the lucky one. It's like kind of...

it's my i don't know it might sound weird saying this too but like the reason i think we are so we know that like being parents is like what we want to do and we know that like we would be good together as parents is because like when it comes to us dealing with like each other we love each other very much we've been through so much we've like had our ups and downs we've had our breakups we've gone back together we know that like when it comes to us like there's just

there's so many different levels to our relationship. And we really don't know where things, we never know where things are going to go. Like we know we love each other more than anything in the world. We know at this point we're for sure like we're always going to fight for each other. Like, you know, that's not a question. But when it comes to having a baby, we just both knew that married or not, we would be so good together as parents. So like we knew bringing a child into this world is,

He was ready. I was ready. It's something we both had agreed on. It's something that like, we also know that even if Kian and I don't work out down the line, we will still be great parents. We'll still be cordial together. We will like be able to,

Make sure that this boy has the best life. I was going to ask you have like any kind of birth plan or like how are you just like we're just going to go in for it. Baby will come or do you have anything any expectations for the big day? We for sure need to write up our birth plan. But I've I've kind of come to the decision lately that I think I just want Kian in the room. Mm hmm.

I know my mom is not going to be happy about that. I said that. That's what we did too. But I just want to... I want to experience like having this baby like with just Kian. Like we're together. We're doing this like as like a team. And we both get to like experience him coming out for like the first time together.

And then we can bring our families in. And also, I get very anxious when I get too many people talking to me. So if I have Kian in one ear being like, you should do this, calm down, blah, blah, blah. And then I have my mom being like, I have four kids. I know what to do. Bend like this. Do like – I'd be like –

everybody get away so i feel like i just need him to be there to just calm me down along with the doctors and the nurses so that's the only thing that just me i'm the doctor that we know so far there's like so many people in and out of the room yeah and then obviously our parents can come visit us like once the baby is there like you can come to the hospital and like say hi and everything but in the delivery room at the time how do you think you're gonna feel are you like nervous are you gonna

pass out. Oh my God. It's not pass out, but I've talked to her about this before. Like I don't do good with blood at all, but I feel like in that moment, I feel like it's just so much adrenaline and it's like a real life moment. I feel like I'll be able to get through it. I just, I'm not going to be able to like look and like realize what's going on. He'll be behind me. There's no way he can be like, Oh, you're not going to look. My birth plan is going to be the holding her hand, like looking at her. You got this. Yeah. And I'd be like this. Don't look down there. You got this. Don't look down there.

Yeah. See, Matt watched the whole thing. He even watched the whole C-section. Very bloody. A lot of blood. Matt.

No, get this. I can see the C-section. I was laying there and I could see in the reflection of the light. There's no curtain. There's a curtain, but I'm looking up at the light. There's all these like, I mean, it's a surgery. There's all these intense lights and it's a plastic thing around it. You watched? Yes, I did. Not the whole thing, but like I keep peeking out and be like, wow, that's crazy. There's like her belly. Oh, he would not. He would not. You saw like organs and stuff. Yeah. Yeah.

Oh my God, we need to stop this podcast. Oh, sorry. I'm going to go away. He is very, very queasy when it comes to blood. Do you think you're going to cry when he comes out? Yes. Probably. How quick do you do skin-to-skin as the father? With the C-section, it wasn't as quickly. I actually had to be like, okay, can I do the skin-to-skin thing now? I feel like I should probably do that. And they're like, oh yeah, you can do skin-to-skin. But nobody told me like, all right, it's time for skin-to-skin. You have to ask for it. You have to advocate for yourself in the hospital. For both the babies, you guys had to do that? Yeah.

Uh, a little bit, yeah. It really depends on, the hospital dictates a lot. Like, it depends on the hospital that you're at. So maybe that's why it's good to come in with a little bit of a plan because we didn't really have one and then we were kind of just like, you guys want to tell us what to do? But then they kind of go based off of you a little bit. That's good to know because I knew that like, when you have the baby, it goes straight to the mother. Right. I didn't know. Right. Like,

I didn't either time because both were kind of different. Okay. So it just depends on the health of the baby and what's going on? It kind of just depends on how the end of the birth goes. Like, I think most of the time, like, right to mom. Right. Like, I got Griffin pretty quick.

It was different because I was getting stitched back up for like 40 minutes or a second. So they put his face right next to mine, which was really sweet. Oh, yeah. I've seen the videos. Okay. I just didn't know. Like, I knew that was kind of the traditional thing is like straight to mom. I didn't know dad's.

Yeah.

Crazy things happen. I'm very excited. I want to do skin to skin. I'm going to walk into that hospital shirtless. Yeah. Oh yeah. The whole weekend or the weekend, the whole couple of days. I was going to be there shirtless. Yeah. I don't like a weekend getaway. A weekend getaway. Yeah.

I'm going to be in there shirtless. I'm so excited for you guys. We're really excited too. And it's cool that we get to see you guys and do this right before we're about to have a baby. We'll see you again soon because we're going to do a YouTube video about

but after that we'll see you with a baby cause like next time we're on the pod we'll have a baby have you ever had a baby on the podcast never save it save it for your kid actually we did we had our baby your baby was wrapped up our baby was wrapped up to Abby so we filmed the episode oh yeah okay but that's fine you haven't had a second like a not your baby a guest baby never had a guest baby on the podcast save it I was gonna ask we talked about this earlier but you don't you haven't decided on a name yet

No name. We have three in the running. Put them in a hat and just draw one. We have three great names and I love all of them, but people have their opinions and then we keep going back and forth. Like, is that too, like, not based on what we're using? I'm going to tell everybody else who's listening to this podcast, if you love a name, you and your partner, don't tell anybody because we loved this one name and we were so set on it. It was Kean Jr. Yeah. Everyone else didn't like it. Wait, that's sad.

changed our opinion and i feel like it's hard we we honestly might still do it but yeah but we we keep going back and forth like is it too basic of a name is it something that's like what if it's something that we're thinking this is what i've been going back and forth on it's like is it something that i think is cool now that in five years i think it's like a not cool name thing i feel like once you know your son as that name i feel like you'll never question it he makes the name

Especially five years down the line, you'll be like,

I would never call them anything else. Right, right. Like they make their name. Yes, they like fit into it. I have heard though of a mom who changed her kid's name a year after they were born. A year after? Yeah, because they're just like, you know what, that's not the right name. And they just change it. So you can always do that. That's the minority though. That's like 1%. I've never gone through something like mentally where I'm like, ooh, this is a cool name. Like I just thought of this and it's a cool name. It's like something silly. And then like a year down the line, I'm like,

why did I do that? Yeah. There were kids in high school where you're like, your parents, what were they doing around the time of your birth? That's interesting. Yeah. Like, I don't know. I don't want to call anyone out, but especially nowadays, like there's some crazy names just being thrown around and you're like, all right. Yeah. So I just, I don't want to. I feel like we don't get it. We'll talk about it off the podcast. Okay. We'll talk about it off the podcast. I don't want to get into that. All right. We'll talk about it off the podcast. I don't want to let him say his name. Yeah. What were you saying, Kenyon? Yeah. No names.

names. I just don't, yeah. Names are a huge, huge thing that I just don't like. It's the biggest thing we're dealing with right now and especially that we're getting close to having the baby. We're kind of freaking out. So much pressure. It's like the first decision you make for your kid. That's like huge. And like I obviously listen, you know, I think about names and then I...

Sometimes you categorize names together. Like you're like, oh, well, if this name, I always associate with this behavior. Oh, and get this. Since it's your first kid, you're kind of setting the tone for future children. Right. Because you can't have...

like a really common name and then like a crazy wacky name and then like a I mean you could but it's the hardest thing ever and I really did not think it was going to be this hard but it is so hard pick it before you get like really hormonal after the baby comes oh yeah well we for sure we for sure have to have it like I told Kian like we need to sign the paperwork at the hospital we're not changing after the hospital but like I kind of just want to see him you get your birth certificate at the hospital okay wait actually get this you have to go pick it up

And we've never picked up either one of our... Oh my gosh, that makes us sound like horrible parents. Yeah, we don't have either birth certificate. We have their socials. They mail that like right away, but they make you pick up the birth certificate. That's why this is called the Unplanned Podcast. Are they holding... I couldn't tell you where because I haven't gone to get it. We need to go... Yeah, do that. You have to. Right? I'm going to go and get both of them, I guess. Interesting. I wonder if they're holding them and they're like... Dust off spider webs. Like...

These irresponsible parents have never... There's no... There's probably plenty of parents who don't. It's so embarrassing. It's fine. It's not good. We'll figure that part out, but yeah. I feel like we have to go to, like, the courthouse. Also, yeah, by the way... You guys go there. You guys can go. Hey, you're looking.

We can go to the courthouse together. You guys can get married and we'll get our birth certificate. Honestly, yeah. We'll be like, hey, what the heck? What are you guys doing here? You know what's weird, Matt? They keep saying we signed the paperwork, which obviously we did that, but do you have any recollection of signing paperwork? I think we officially signed the paperwork. What if we're not actually married? No, really. What if? Hey, come over here, you guys. And we're just like, oh, he's signed here. Sign here. All right, you're good. And we're back on the dance floor. It was so quick. Wait, it was that night? Yeah, we signed it that night. She didn't do it on her own.

remember you sign more paperwork buying a car is what you're saying yeah okay yeah I mean that's a lot of paperwork a car it's like getting a car we signed so many things for a house you just keep signing pages you don't even know what the freak that says I guess to get married I think it's just one signature so yeah it's so it's so weird to me that's insane and it can be it can be like literally do you have to pay money to get the marriage paperwork why do they have no recollection of the paperwork I'm gonna say it's free but like it's actually not

It's free. We might not be married. We're 100% happy we're married. We're legally married. Whoa. What if it was like $10 just to get married? I don't know. I'm guessing it's not. Yeah, but then it's like thousands of dollars to get divorced. Literally. I'm sure you could do a cheap divorce and like not have lawyers involved. But then one of the partners, if it was a messy divorce, could like screw the other person over. You know what I'm saying? Okay. Which is probably why you guys aren't getting married. Yeah.

Yeah. There's just a lot. Yeah. There's a lot. Do you know that technically our house is just in Matt's name? So therefore, if he were to divorce me, he could take everything. That's not true though. Because we're- Look, they're both like so- It's not true because of the state. We- You can also- That is so funny because it's like we're more like-

oh yeah we're for sure going in on a house together we're for sure signing together more than we're like yeah marriage i don't know if we could sign that yeah we're already talking about getting a house together we're way backwards we're so backwards that's hilarious insane no but the state the state that we live in though um it's it's like a 50 50 state with marriage so like if why'd you google this what's a prenup i just knew what prenup is like you don't know what that is

Want to protect... Say someone's really rich. Yeah, say someone's like a billionaire and they marry somebody who's not a billionaire. He's like, what if you're a hundred thousand dollars... Can you still say it?

A thousandaire? It's just to make sure that people have their assets protected, right? So if someone, I don't know, thought maybe someone's marrying just... Why are you saying assets? Can you just say money? Their money is protected. Yeah, I see. Does everyone have to sign one if you get married? No, no, we didn't do a prenup.

because we had no we had no money you're like should we do it literally we combined our finances because we were both like literally 20 and we had no money so everyone was like you guys combined your bank accounts when you guys were not even engaged and we're like yeah because it was about 500 in there i don't know what we had yeah well honestly i mean i feel like we yeah that's kind of the only thing we've done

is we both have our own bank accounts and then we recently have a joint account now. And that's all of our work that we do together is now for our joint account. So it's kind of like we're learning how to share money and do all that. And then we're evenly gonna go on the house, our next house together. So like we're kind of starting in like, I feel like that's our only on track. You don't wanna buy it just yourself? Nope. Nope. Let him move in. Yeah, let you move in.

Yeah, no. Matt kindly let me move into his house. That's so nice of you. Matt kindly let me move in. Ayla is your landlord. I'm paying her mortgage. Oh, Kian would not last in the house if I was just a landlord.

Why are you sitting down? Get up. You have to put down a security deposit. You wouldn't want that. Anyway, I'm so excited for you guys. Thank you. Thank you guys for coming on the unplanned podcast. If you haven't already checked them out on YouTube, they have a Keen and Ayla YouTube channel. You can also find them. I think you guys have individual channels. Instagram. Are you changing it then to Diary of Three?

So we have our, I have like my own channel that I do and I post like basically like updates on like my life being pregnant and blah, blah, blah. Kian does have a channel, but he doesn't really post on it anymore. He has his K and J channel that he posts every Friday. That's his one thing he's been doing with his friend for forever. Wow.

Oh, yeah. And then he has like a video. Yeah, we don't even forget. You're a streamer. Yeah. You play video games and stream it. It's too much. People watch that. Too much going on. You get paid to play video games, essentially. Yes. Aayla doesn't like that. That's crazy, though. Every time I go in there, it's like, you're going in there to play Fortnite. I'm like, but. You're like, I'm making money, babe. I know. I know.

I love it in the sense that like it's cool that he gets to like, you know, be a part of his, like he gets to talk to his fans, like, you know. Yeah. But it's the gaming part. Anyway, we don't have to get into that. But yeah, we have multiple channels. If you could find one, there's multiple. Yeah.

Very cool. Thank you guys so much for coming on. Real quick, I wanted to shout out Wander for letting us stay at this beautiful home. We're in Malibu right now. This is not our house. This is not our house. I'm sure you guys know that. It's a very nice house. I'll have to show you the view where we're literally staring at the ocean right now in Malibu. It's beautiful. I need to check out Wander myself. I know. And it's a smart home. It comes with a Tesla. Every Wander house comes with a Tesla. That's the thing that

blows my mind. Isn't that cool? It's a free Tesla with the house while you stay there. The car's just there for you. What? Insane. Isn't that cool? Insane. Okay, whoa. I'll have to give you guys their contacts. I'm sure you can leave. So many cool locations. One in Tahoe. They have one in Bandon, Oregon. We've stayed at the one in Oregon. Surfside Beach. Blew me away. The one in Oregon was, I did not know what to expect. It was the prettiest house ever. It was the best. We went on a baby move.

and Joshua Tree. Joshua Tree is sick. Please send me their contact. Vail. We went snowboarding in Vail. We did a vlog of that trip. Wow. That sounds bougie. We all go on a snowboarding trip. Get our babies on board. We should go to the Lake Tahoe one. We could all go snowboarding. I love Lake Tahoe. Oh my god, we haven't cut stuff now. With a newborn? No, it's not a snowboard? There's no way. Hold it. I'll strap him to me. I want to get him a little board. Get a little ski suit. No, but this is cool now. We have a... He's moving so much. We have a couple... We don't have anyone to do this. Well,

couple friends we don't have any mom and dad friends yeah we don't have mom and dad friends we'll be your first let's go that'll be fun baby play dates yeah baby play dates and as always now this is where we say peace out dudes oh okay okay so we say one two three peace out we might be cutting this bit at some point okay we can do audio three no do it in your voice okay what do you say peace out dudes yeah well i was thinking like should we do their bit because they always do the uh let's do it

Let's do it. She has never done it. She hates it. Wait, what do you say again? O-D-O-3. Yeah, because no one can say that. I don't even know why I do that. I don't know either. Wait, O-D-O-3? O-D-O-3 out. O-D-O-3 out. I don't know why I do that. Because I think actually Liver King does it. He goes, Liver King out. Wait, can you?

So I do that way. Why don't you boys do it? And me and Abby will do it. No, come on. Everybody has to do it. Okay, fine. Here we go. Ayla, this is the first. I'm going to watch you. I'm just going to do it minimal. Minimal. Minimal. Yeah. Here we go. Ready? How are you ending it? Thanks for watching. Thank you for watching, guys. Go visit Wander. Subscribe.

And as we always say, we all said that so bad. Let's go.