Ep 208: It's Giving Dippin Dots
01:04:00 Share

So I have some big news for vegans and vegetarians everywhere. It's Hellman's plant-based mayo spread and dressing. Made for people with a plant-based diet or anyone really who wants to enjoy the great taste of Hellman's real without the eggs. Hellman's plant-based is perfect for sandwiches, salads, veggie burgers, or any of your family favorites.

To celebrate, Hellman's is sharing some easy, delicious plant-based recipes at hellmans.com. Hellman's Plant-Based Mayo Spread and Dressing. Same great taste, plant-based.

If you're a smoker or dipper looking to make a change, you really only need one reason to do it. But with Zinn Nicotine Pouches, you can find many. Zinn is America's number one nicotine pouch. It's made with only six simple ingredients. Plus, Zinn is the only nicotine pouch with a 10-day hassle-free trial. There are lots of options when it comes to nicotine satisfaction, but there's only one Zinn. Find yours in online or in a store near you at zinn.com slash find.

Warning, this product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical. Hey, guys. We here at This Is Important love Philadelphia cream cheese. It is extremely versatile and can be used to enhance any meal or snack. I love to use cream cheese on my bagels. I even dip pretzels in it. What? I know, I'm crazy. Yeah, dude, it's hella good. You gotta try it. With so many unique recipes...

How could you go wrong? And yes, you could find a ton of recipes on the Philadelphia website. Visit creamcheese.com for recipe inspiration so you can start adding Philadelphia cream cheese to your recipes at home.

Chespirito. Chespirito.

How did a Mexican writer become a symbol of global television? Listen to Nacional Leyenda, Chespirito, en la aplicación iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you stream podcasts. Welcome to This is Important, a production of iHeartRadio, the show where we only talk about what is most obviously very crucially important. Today on This is Important... I look like a fuckboy.

Dude, have they ever made a field of dreams porno? I mean, I thought you'd say like I was dipping her dot, but you're like, I'm dipping my dot. Let's go. Punk rock, getting radical. We're back, we're back, we're back, we're back. Punk rock, getting radical. You need another four inches. Woo!

Oh, my God. You guys. Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot. Remix. Did you clap? Did you clap, Blake? What's up? Dude. We didn't hear you clap. Did you clap? Yeah. Oh, I didn't see you. I made it clap. Oh. I make it clap. Busta. God, that's a banger. Oh, my God. Busta Rhymes. Underrated. Underrated.

Busta Rhymes. Yeah. When you hear people talk about best MCs of all time, blah, blah, blah, I'm like, how is this dude not higher on the list? Busta Rhymes is amazing. Yeah. He's fucking amazing. He's amazing. His albums have a few skips, but his hits are absolutely timeless fire. I mean, remember that music video of...

uh, put your hands on my eyes and see, put your hands on my eyes. Can see if you want to put it with me. Yeah. It's all glow in the dark and shit. That shit was sick. I had to wrap Busta Rhymes in the movie, the intern. Okay. That I co-starred with Ders. Got to, got to. Yeah. I was allowed to, uh,

And she, Nancy Myers, the director, she was like, gave me a list of songs to choose from. That's cool. And I was like, oh, Busta Rhymes would be funny because it's such a hard song to rap. If I nail it, it'll be funny. And then it fucking sucked because I just gave myself so much homework, dude.

Right. Yeah, that's a really difficult. Like another another song would have been probably just as funny. Like, I don't know. It didn't change the movie in any way. I do. You know, I don't even think it made it in. It did. It did. It's in the movie. It's in the movie. Don't do that to him. Yeah. It's like a big scene in mind, Blake. So don't take that from me. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Yeah. It's kind of the linchpin of the film. Oh.

Yeah, you didn't see the movie, dude. Yes, I did. Yes, I did. I for sure saw the intern. I remember there's it's really funny because there's this whole scene where Robert De Niro has a boner and it made me crack up. Yeah. And he's method, too. He's method. He's method. He's like Nancy's like, are you ready? And he's like, no, no.

Not yet. Not yet. Not yet. Not yet. No, no. Give me a second. And then he would open up his drawstring and blow, just blow down towards it. Right. Yeah. Really? That gets him going. Yeah. Ironically, that was on like kind of Adam's side of the movie. And then when I showed up, he had to like talk his boner down to get on set because he was, he's not supposed to have one. Yeah.

And he actually used the same method. Yeah, you hear him in his trailer going, it's too hard! He was blowing down again, but like, differently. A hotter breath. Yeah, exactly. And, you know, please

you know, uh, like and subscribe, take your, take your headsets off. I'd like to talk to Bob. Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I said that. I'm so sorry. I said that Bob. No, he's for sure listening. Yeah. My, my headsets off. Go ahead. Yeah. Bob, I would like to give you a formal, uh, private apology. And then in a second, I'll give you a public apology guys. You can put the headphones back on. Okay. And we're back. And Bob, I would like to give you a public apology. I got a feeling he said no.

No. For sure, Bobby, Robert De Niro is listening to this while he's nursing his child right now. So it feels really good. Okay, cool.

Okay. All right. Bye, guys. For sure. He's nursing his child. Doesn't he have a newborn? Yeah, but men don't nurse, dude. Believe me, I made that mistake. That's right. They can. Please don't. I made that mistake. It's not a mistake. Don't bow to them, dude. You did fine by what you did. True.

Jesus. Well, you know, it was just a joke and they can't actually nurse. It's like a just biologically. But if you let them suck long enough, something happens. It will happen. If you build it, they will come. That's what they say. If you suck it, they will come.

Yes, points! And that's points. And that's points, Blake. If you suck it, they will come. That's points. That's pretty good. Dude, have they ever made a Field of Dreams porno? Yeah, if you suck it, they will come. Yeah, dude, of course. If that doesn't exist, we failed as a society. Would it be Field of...

Creams? Adam, did you write this porno? This feels like everything's on deck for you, dude. I'm flowing. Field of Creams? It seems like Adam's got a memo pad that he wrote all this stuff on. Hey, Field of Dreams. Worked my way to that here. That's real one to two. It's science. Oh, by the way, I realized last episode

I slipped in a word of the day and you guys did not

Get it. Would you guys like to guess what the last week's word of the day was? Was it gank? It wasn't gank. It was not gank. Because that's from the Bay. There's no way that that's just slang for sure. And I said it once, and I know you guys didn't hear it. And then I said it again towards the end of the podcast as Kyle was leaving. I said it, and you guys didn't bat an eye. You guys just assumed that this is a word that rolls off my tongue. Easy peasy, fresh and easy. Hmm.

You are so dumb. To be fair, I think we're kind of bored by the game. I like it. I'm still learning. I'm a lifelong learner. What was it? I do want to know. Oh, you're bored? I'm sorry, Durs. I'm sorry. I never mean to bore you. No, never bore Durs. Dude, that's one rule about Durs. Do not bore him. Keep him entertained. Keep him entertained. He must be entertained. What was the word? Was it...

No, I have no idea. It was clandestine. Clandestine. Oh, shit. You said that word? I did, yeah. A couple times.

That's a comic book. I think it doesn't help that I'm not always listening. What was the context that you said the word clandestine? He said, all right, bye. We'll see you next clandestine. You lose! Well, Kyle goes, I'm like, Kyle, you got a secret meeting to go to. Kyle and his clandestine meetings. Oh. Oh, I didn't hear that at all. Oh, yeah. Me neither. That would have stuck out like a sore thumb.

thumb because what even the fuck is a clandestine I was the only one talking when I said it that second time I said it earlier and I was busy thinking about what I needed to say what's clandestine

What's clandestine? You don't know what clandestine means? It means like a secret or like a to keep something. Like a secret. Will you use it in a sentence? Like a secret society? Secret meaning. It was a perfect thing. I mean, here, I'll look at the definition. That's interesting. Will you use it in a sentence? Clandestine describes something done secretly or in a private place or way. So a clandestine meaning is the perfect use of that word.

Nailed it! Yes, points! I thought maybe you would get it. I thought you'd be like, yeah, you said clandestine. Hey, man, congrats, dude. You got us. Hey, guys, field of creams. Field of creams. Yeah, dude, this guy is a switch hitter. He can go both ways. I love it.

You're one for five, brother. You got us, dude. I'm hyped on you. I got you, dude. This is my new favorite thing in the pod. Field of Creams. Do you have a new word today or are you retiring after that? Are you like, yo, it's over? No, I'm going to get one on deck. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Don't worry. So in Field of Creams, is there just some chick fucking all these baseball ghosts?

Like, there's corn in the... There's corn in the... Corn in the what? Where's the corn? There's a lot of corn happening, right? I don't think I've actually seen that movie, Field of Dreams. I'm going to be honest. I don't think I've watched it front to back. Whoa, dude. It's kind of awesome. What are you talking about? You never... You didn't, when you were a kid...

go to McDonald's. Yes. I did that. 20 piece McNugget. Yeah. And for $10 more, you could get the movie, the VHS movie. Wait, what? Wait, what? You didn't remember this? That was the era. Yes. And your mom goes and you're really bugging her to do it. And you have the last three times. And then finally she just breaks down. She's like, you want the movie? Fine. You get the movie. You know, I'm a child of the nineties. You know, I love all, but,

What was this deal? You could get like Dances with Wolves. Yes, there was like three movies. Wait, is it all Kevin Costner? I think it might have been a Costner. It was a Costner package. Yeah. We got Dances with Wolves from McDonald's is all I remember. And we got Field of Dreams. Wait, wait, hold on. Explain the...

the whole deal. What is it? They were $9.99. They were $9.99. I thought, I mean, I think. I remember them being $9.99. Yeah. If you bought chicken nuggets, you got, I'm so confused. Yeah, if you bought some sort of meal deal package, you could buy the movie for, I guess, $9.99. And then you grab the VHS, and then you go home, and you're like, this is dope because it's a McDonald's version of

No, it's just a movie. I don't even think it had any emblems or arches or anything. No, but it made you as a kid kind of like it more because you got it from the Mickey D's. Okay, but what was even the deal? Did McDonald's have a deal with McDonald's?

Miramax? Did Kevin Cost... Is that what you want it to be? Miramax? Why? Because you're a Harvey Weinstein guy? You're a big Harvey guy? Did Harvey walk into McDonald's? Harvey Weinstein was the purple... What's the purple guy? Grimace? Grimace! He sexually assaulted Grimace. He butt-fucked a Hamburglar and got a deal at McDonald's. He got hand jobs from the Fry Guys. Toasty!

Yeah. Can you get Batman? I either got Batman from McDonald's or from our grocery store. Okay, so maybe this is a Warner Brothers deal. And remember the cool Batman cups and stuff that they used to have? Yes, but this is way different. The Batman Forever. That's what it was. I got Batman Forever, I believe. Of course. From McDonald's with the craziest cup that had the penguin on it.

Well, everybody knows the craziest cups ever was Taco Bell when the Phantom Menace came out. Did you ever have the Darth Maul cup? That shit was fire. No, nerd. Dude, everybody had like seven of those. Nerd. Dude, Darth Maul. We were like in eighth, ninth grade. Dude, fuck you, dude. That's prime Darth Maul age. Absolutely.

Adam was at the regular mall, not Darth Maul. Yeah, I was at the mall trying to talk to girls. I mean, you were collecting cups still. No, dude. Every time you went to even if you didn't want it, if you went to Taco Bell, they would just throw fucking Darth Maul cups at you. So many of them, bro. I'm looking at the Coca-Cola McDonald's Batman Returns Penguin plastic cup right now.

It's fire. My fucking brain is melting. They used to give you so much cool free shit. It was out of this world, dude. And that's why McDonald's has fallen off. They forgot that children want cool free stuff. Go on. I mean, the fact that they don't have a deal with Marvel and they're just like giving you Iron Man. It's crazy. It's giving. It's giving.

Hold up. It's giving Iron Man. It's giving Iron Man. I'm lost. Before the podcast, I don't even know if we said it. And I'll tell Chloe this, my wife. I'll tell her. I'm not afraid of her. Okay? No matter what. No matter how I act around her, I'm not afraid of her. Sounds like it. But the one thing that does bug me about...

is she will say it's giving. Like that's a Gen Z thing. It's giving this, it's giving that. And she'll say that a lot. And it does bug me. And I've told her that it bugs me. And she goes, I like it. I like doing it. It's fun for me. And I'm like, well, do you think this could lead to divorce? Or what do you think? She's like, it's giving divorce. It's giving divorce. It's giving I'm leaving you. And by the way, is that proper usage? I've never heard this in my life.

Yeah, I know. Ders as a Gen Xer, basically. Oh, my God. It's giving... Ders is too old to understand what this is. I like alternative rock and roll.

Yeah, that was the right. It's giving divorce. That is the right usage. Yeah, it was actually perfect. It was crazy. I don't like it either. Yeah. I have to put this Darth Maul cup in the chat because if you guys don't wait, how do I even access the chat? I was just going to say, you act like you know how to click it in there. No, I'm getting here. It's giving. No, I'm getting there.

I'm getting in here. Let me give. You've never seen this dark mall cup. It's giving. Dark mall. It's giving Blake was too old to collect cups. Vibes. Wait, so they just are skipping the word vibes, essentially, Adam?

That's what this that's what the giving thing is. You guys see this because come on, bro. I mean, yeah, this cup is kind of dope. Yeah. But what is laying next to it? It's like that. This is all also like a little dildo. Like, what is the fuck is that? You have to suck his dick. That's straw. I don't know. How do I put this picture in the fucking chat?

The guys learn how to zoom. Cut and paste. This is cool. Copy image. I think that's a pod racer. I think that's his little motorcycle. Well, Blake, I was specifically talking. This is literally 1999. This is my shit. Oh, yeah. Here we go. We got a code. No. Nope.

Redirect notice. I was talking the real 90s, the 93s, 94s, you know, when we were children. Mid 90s. Yeah. Well, I mean, we all mature at different ages. Well, look at this Michael Keaton fucking dancing with Michelle Pfeiffer cup. Yeah. Okay. Well, I don't know if this is should it just should it devolve into us looking at photos of cups?

Yeah, those are tight. Those are tight cups. I do like them. I don't know. I feel like our conversation is giving... It's giving boring podcasts. This is important vibes. Let's go listen to something else. Dude, I will say it is crazy talking to Jen Ziers, my assistant, Michelle. She's great. She's dope. Can't buy a lighter to save her life. But she is 20...

She's 26 years old. So the other day I was like, we were going, me and Danny McBride and a few of the writers, we're going to go see David Spade. He's in town. Okay. You know, I know David a little bit. The writers know David. Danny's excited to go see David. So we're going to go see David. Michelle's like, what are you doing tonight? And I'm like, I'm going to go see David Spade. And she's like, who? And I'm like, David Spade. And she goes, I don't know who that is.

And I go, you don't know who David Spade is? And she's like, I literally have never heard that name before. Is he like a musician? I'm like, he's a comedian. That's crazy. He plays the microphone. There it is. Nice. She's like, what movies? And I go, well, Tommy Boy. Yeah. Oh, boy. She does not know that movie. Does not know Tommy Boy, even a little bit. That's crazy. Even a little bit, dude. And I was like, oh, I officially feel old.

right now because I would absolutely put Tommy boy in one of my top 10 funniest movies or at least most formative. Absolutely. No problem. Like that was like a huge movie to me. Oh, huge. Oh, for us. I haven't rewatched it in a while, but I guarantee it's still pretty funny, right? So very funny. I mean, very formulaic. Uh,

But I don't mind that as long as the characters are being funny in the formulaic movie. I personally don't mind that. Does not matter. It's all good. Yeah. Yeah. It even helps actually. Yeah. Sometimes. Yeah. Right. It's pretty simple. That's what people like shit on the outlaws and like it's a little formulaic and I'm like,

yeah correct what do you want it to be do you want to be like solving a fucking riddle yeah it doesn't matter yeah we were just trying to be funny we were just trying to be funny in it and it's uh yeah say uh yeah so it really it kind of it took it took me back and then and then i was like going through like bands of that i that she just doesn't know i i don't know i well this is a deep cut i posted the other day that

LFO. I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch. That dumbass song. The first dance at my wedding. You don't have to shit on it. We know you love it, bro. Don't shit on your homies. I loved making fun of it back in the day. It's giving denial. No, I didn't. I didn't. I love it. I didn't. I didn't fart.

No, I was making fun of that song and I posted, I saw like a thing on Instagram. So I posted the video of them

singing summer girls yeah and then i wrote this is our generation's montana boys you know those tiktok guys that just like wear cowboy hats and like are sexy yeah they really make me laugh oh yes that's that's not a band because i was like oh i guess montana boys is like a fucking band no they're just like a group of like good-looking thick cocked young men that wear cowboy hats and like kind of

squints and looks at the camera and they're like very successful on the internet because of it. And one of them is dating Kristen Cavallari from like Laguna Beach. Oh, nice. Yeah. Sure. So that's cool. That's cool for them. I think she was the computer wallpaper back in the day. Perfect. She's like our age and this kid is like 22. So, you know, that's pretty tight for her. Good for them. Go Montana boys. And she was like, I have no idea why.

I know who the Montana boys are, but I've never heard this song in my life. I think that's fair. That one's fair. It's a one-hit wonder. It's like a one-hit wonder. Yeah. If she had never heard of NSYNC, then I'd be like, okay. That would be worrisome. Well, dude, that was the...

What happened with the cop that pulled over Justin Timberlake? What happened? Yeah, that's true. Damn. So the cop pulled him over for a DUI and didn't recognize Justin Timberlake. That sucks. He's saying I'm Justin Timberlake. Yeah. He's like, okay. That really fucks up my whole plan if I get pulled over. I'm like, if they don't know who Justin Timberlake is. No. That's why you can't do it. You can't do it. Yeah, you gotta Uber, brother. You gotta. You gotta Uber. I'm drunk now.

If Justin Timberlake gets pulled over and he can't get out of it, oh, bro. Oh, yeah. I think that the move is don't say, do you know who I am? You just start working titles of things you've been in into sentences. Fuck it. Just start dancing. I know it's been a long week.

I'm kind of a workaholic. Yeah, but I have to poo. Look, I'm not an intern anymore. I'm not an intern. But look, is it a monarch legacy of monster situation? Is that a monarch butterfly? I was driving and a goddamn monarch butterfly hit the windshield and freaked me out. I don't know, man, but if we don't get this over soon, it's starting to kind of be loose butthole. I got to take a shit, brother.

Just let me know how long this is going to take. You're not saying titles anymore, but yes, exactly that. Because he's not biting. Look, I'm not an outlaw. I'm just driving drunk, okay? I'm just driving drunk. Look, I'm not an outlaw. At least I'm not high on dope. Hey, what's that over there? Is it cake? Yeah, there you go. See, you're nailing it now. You get the format. That took me so long to even understand what the hell is it cake. Yeah.

Is this a car or is it cake? I'm not drunk. He's like, this guy's fucking hammered. This guy's fucking wasted, dude. Your body cam footage is just you thinking things are cake.

And you lie going, no, I was trying to let him know I was on the show. Nobody believes you. Is your gun cake? Don't judge them. It's just me getting shot by a cop. Oh, man, I was on my way to a wedding. My buddies Mike and Dave need wedding dates. Ah, not a man. Is that gun cake?

Sorry, I was driving and I was reading the... What is the fucking Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse? What was the name of that movie? What was that movie that you were in? Scout's Guide to the Zombie... I was just reading the Scout's Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse. Lost track of the road. Is that... Is your gun cake? Is your gun cake? Is that baton cake?

He's hitting you with a baton. Is that cake? Is that baton cake? Oh, it don't feel like cake. It don't feel like cake. That's a strong cake. Get up and come down with the sickness. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. That made my tummy hurt. Hey, sorry. I missed that traffic light.

Yeah. You ever see that episode? You're definitely on IMDb right now. Yeah. When we first met just a few minutes ago, I wasn't drunk. Right? So you are now? Look, man, I understand you caught me. It's game over, man. It's game over, man. It's game over, man. You caught me.

This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Hey, guys. Do you ever find yourself comparing your life to others on social media? Yeah. I do. Do you get caught up wishing you had someone else's life? Well, unfortunately, comparison is the thief of joy, and it's easy to envy others.

It might look like they have it all together on their Instagram, but in reality, they probably don't. Therapy can help you focus on what you want instead of what others have so you can start living your best life. Therapy can really benefit your life. It's helpful for learning positive coping skills and how to set boundaries. It empowers you to be the best version of yourself. It isn't just for those who've experienced major trauma, etc. If you're thinking of starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online.

It's designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and switch therapists anytime for no additional charge. Stop comparing and start focusing with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com slash this is today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp.com.

H-E-L-P dot com slash this is. Top reasons your career wants you to move to Ohio. So many amazing growth opportunities, high paying jobs in technology, advanced manufacturing, engineering, life sciences and more. You'll soar to new heights just like the Wright brothers, John Glenn, even Neil Armstrong. Their careers all took off

It is summer, and on NPR's Planet Money podcast, that means it is time to grab your notebooks and your headphones and tune into the economics crash course for your ears.

Planet Money Summer School is covering the economic history of the world. From the birth of money to the Industrial Revolution to modern trade policy, we've got the lessons to keep you sounding smart at the beach with help from real economic historians. Every Wednesday until Labor Day. Listen to Planet Money from NPR on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

Guess what, Mango? What's that, Will? So iHeart is giving us a whole minute to promote our podcast, Part-Time Genius. I know. That's why I spent my whole week composing a haiku for the occasion. It's about my emotional journey in podcasting over the last seven years, and it's called Earthquake House.

Mango, I'm going to cut you off right there. Why don't we just tell people about our show instead? Yeah, that's a better idea. So every week on Part-Time Genius, we feed our curiosity by answering the world's most important questions. Things like, when did America start dialing 911? Is William Shatner's best acting work in Esperanto? Also, what happened to Esperanto? Plus, we cover questions like, how Chinese is your Chinese food? How do dollar stores stay in business? And of course,

is there an Illuminati of cheese? There absolutely is. And we are risking our lives by talking about it. But if you love mind-blowing facts, incredible history, and really bad jokes, make your brains happy and tune in to Part-Time Genius. Listen to Part-Time Genius on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

Well, Justin Timberlake did say this is going to ruin the tour. And then the cop said, what tour? Like, what are you talking about? And then he goes, the world tour. So he was doing it a little bit. He didn't say I'm just I tried from NSYNC.

Right. Yeah. And then did you see the videos afterwards? And I think it was like proven that it wasn't like, uh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I know what you're talking about. That it wasn't him in the concert, but he looked so strung out. It was him like singing in,

In a concert. Yeah. And his eyes just look bloodshot to hell. He seems cool, man. Now I'm like kind of in on JT now. I know. I'm kind of like I want to party with Justin Timberlake a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. I always like this solo stuff. But now I'm like, maybe we got to go golfing with this bro. He seems cool, dude. Yeah. Yeah. He's your guy. I can't physically golf. But yeah, I want to drink with him for sure. I can't even drink that much anymore. Fuck. Whatever. I just want to do drugs with him.

Yeah. You can rake the sand traps. Yeah. You could drive the golf cart. That's cool. Yeah, that's fun. Yeah, hand you guys beers. Yeah, Spotlight's pretty sick. Yeah, man. Have you guys seen or done those, like, stand-up surfboard, skateboard-looking things that, like, you put your...

clubs on. The hell are you guys done? It's giving old Manders. It's like, uh, it's like an off-road fucking skateboard that you put your clubs on the front of and then you like zoom around the course. That sounds so dumb. Is that real, Bam? Yeah. Hello!

Oh, that sounds kind of fun. If any of the producers are listening, can you just put that in the chat, please? It looks next level, but I'm like, if you're not in your 20s or under 35, you're going to eat shit and die doing this thing. It's going to be really funny to see like just a bunch of just John Daly looking motherfuckers just blackout drunk on a course just eating shit.

What a legend, though. John Daly's got to be the coolest professional athlete of all time, right? That guy is fucking sick as hell. I wonder. That's your guy? I wonder if he is or if he's just like your drunk racist uncle. Is he? Is he racist? I wonder how cool he actually is. Is he racist? I don't know. He seems like. I think he's cool. I think he's actually cool. I feel like he's cool. I think he's down. I think he gets it. There might be like one or two races he doesn't fuck with, but he's cool with the rest. Okay.

Yeah. He's racist only to a couple. The biggest ones, probably. Oh, man. We don't like that. Yeah. I was hoping it was like a niche racism. Like he had a couple of run. And by the way, I don't know. And maybe he is cool. I thought he like really doesn't like Icelandic people, which I'm like down for. Oh, shit. And then Durr's is.

He's not from Iceland. He's from Norway. That's different. No, but Bjork comes after him. Those are the Icelandic countries, right? Icelandic... No, that's Scandinavian, I think, is what you're... Oh, really? It's a different thing? Ah, fuck if I know. I'm racist towards them. You're giving never-traveled...

Hold up. Uh, yeah, no dirt. Uh, dude, this, this thing is actually so sick. And the fact that I don't have golf boards. Okay. Everybody TII nation, go to www.golfboard.com golfboard.com. We don't not affiliated. We don't own these. I've never seen them. Uh,

Nor do I really golf, but I want one delivered to my house. And my wife is going to see it and go, it's giving divorce because it's fucking huge, dude. This is how I want to pick my kid up from school. It looks like they're kite surfing. This is giving divorce. It's science. So it's a full on little...

Oh, yeah. Because it's bigger than a Lime scooter. It's like a proper off-road vehicle. It's huge. It's four wheels. It's four wheels. It's fucking huge. Yeah. So, yeah, golf board...

Feel free to send us a gaggle of these. I want a golf board. Yeah. I will take this down the freeway, the 405. Now, is it safe to strap my child to my chest and take the golf board? There's no doubt. There's no doubt in my mind. Sweetie, I'm going to go to Chick-fil-A. I'm hopping on the golf board. Give me both. This one has a cooler. This one has a cooler on the back. Dude, these are sick. Yeah, those are sick. Good pull there, Dersi. Good pull.

Really good. Yes, points! Run your errands? And are people really doing this, though? See, when you said, have you seen these, where have you seen these? Because I've never... Yeah, who's riding this? This seems like a deep cut. Yeah. I've never heard of this. I just feel like...

I feel like Instagram, they think they know me and they're like, hey, honky here. Yeah. Send me videos of this. Yeah. So you've been looking at a lot of golf stuff lately and this started to pop up. Have you? Are you starting to dabble in the golf there, Jersey? Is that what's happening? Your honkiness is finally. Yeah. Yeah.

It's finally come out. No, I can't. It takes too long. It's just like... It does. It takes a long time. I cannot enjoy something that takes that long. Um...

I like playing nine. I took my kids to do some putt-putt this weekend. That's sick. Around the corner. Putt-putt goes fucking hard, bro. They had a mental breakdown. Nucky grandma! Yeah, why hasn't putt-putt had a real resurgence? I feel like putt-putt needs to really come back. That was literally all my family would do for like

something fun. Like that was it. Like if we were like, yo, what do you guys want to do? It's like, we're going to go to miniature golf. And how about the last hole where you hit it in the thing and it goes away? Get a free game. So good. Get a free game. Isn't that the best? It's the best. Well, you'd pocket the ball and just go again.

Of course, but it was. No, I did not do that. That seems a little bit fucking whack, brother. That's not whack. That's just being a teenager and you don't have the money to play for it. Maybe that's why every putt-putt golf is closed now because these freaking guys would just loop back around and do all three courses. You're supposed to pay every time. My girlfriend in high school worked at the Dippin' Dots in the middle of

of the putt-putt course. Say less. It's science. Say less. He was the fucking best, dude. So you'd be putt-putt and he's the best. And then stop to the Dippin' Dot hut in the middle of the course that you just fucking stood there all day and served up some

Space ice cream. How good are Dippin' Dots, though? Are they good? Oh, they're so good. Yeah, Dippin' Dots rock. They're delicious, right? It's the ice cream of the future. It was the ice cream of the future. Didn't catch on. They're usually not good, but it's such a rush to eat them. Honestly, they don't taste good.

No, they're disgusting. They're very watery. They're disgusting. I thought they were pretty good. From what I remember, they were pretty good. No, dude, they're bad. Oh, my God! No, no, no. That's because after you got the Dippin' Dots, you knew you were getting a little more after that. I was Dippin' my Dot. Okay. Okay.

Young love. Adam, your dick's a dot. I'm pissed now. It's giving a dot. I mean, I thought you'd say like I was dipping her dot, but you're like, I'm dipping my dot. Yeah. Huh? Your dick is giving dot, bro. It's giving a dot. Uh.

Yeah, she worked in the middle of this, of the putt-putt, and it overlooked the parking lot where I would buy my weed, and she did not like me smoking weed. It was a little bone of contention that we had. You're throwing your life away. Yeah, totally. That sucks. Smoke weed every day. I remember one time specifically, she texts me, and she's like,

are you buying weed right now? And I look up and she's just in her little Dippin' Dots outfit, just like against the chain link fence, watching me like,

Buy drugs. I'm not touching your dot tonight. What's the end of that story? That was it. She caught me. Then he roasted a bowl and she said, fine, you can have dipping dots. Fine, you can have it. So Blake, did you think that was going to be a good ending to the story? It was not my story, man. Don't help him out. He's a killer. How many flavors did dipping dots even have?

They had a bunch of flavors, dude. They got all kinds of flavors. I feel like there wasn't that many. Yeah, I think they had a dozen. I feel like, I don't, why is this shitting on Dippin' Dots? I think it's a cute childhood story. Look, Dippin' Dots. Because I'm trying to remember what was the point of Dippin' Dots other than like little children. Are you out of your mind? What was the point? You're the one who, what?

Go, go off King. They were dots of ice cream. It was weird and crazy. I know, but the flavors were ass. No, they weren't. Well,

I don't know if the flavors were ass. I think that the quality was butthole. It was all butthole ass doo-doo. Okay, I think you guys... All right, hang on. But there's like strawberry shortcake. There was like... Yeah, there was a lot of good flavors. I feel like maybe you guys got bad batches or maybe as time went on... There's one batch. It got worse. Of course, of course. Quality got worse.

But I'm telling you, my girl that worked in the Dippin' Dots stand in the middle of the putt-putt course, her batches were on paint. Okay? Okay. So you're claiming you had the hottest Dippin' Dots in the country. Like, where was Dippin' Dots discovered? Who? I don't know. Like, in a lake. I feel like it was a Six Flags situation for me. Water parks and Six Flags. I don't know if...

if they're discovered or not. It wasn't like they're in the Amazon jungle and moved a bunch of branches out of the way and they're like, you don't know that. Look at this cave. It's filled with dipping dots. Which founded in Padua.

Paducah. Paducah. Kentucky. How the fuck? Paducah? Paducah? Paducah? Yeah. That is in the middle of nowhere. Kentucky in 1988. Paducah. Wow. It started in his parents' garage. What the hell? Oh, yeah. You know it tastes good. It was originally invented as cow feed when Jones, who specialized in cryogenics,

was trying to make efficient fodder for farm animals. How are they going to make the fucking Flamin' Hot Cheetos movie and we don't got a Dippin' Dots movie? This is interesting. This is really interesting. By the way, did you watch the Flamin' Hot Cheetos movie? Not at all. Don't even know where to see it.

Kind of good. Hulu. Hulu, yeah. Not bad. Wow. Yeah, in 2011, they filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy, and they are fully foreclosed. So, yeah, it seems like they're... Dippin' Dots? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Dippin' Dots is gone, dude. That shit is bad. But I'm sorry. I've had Dippin' Dots in the last 10 years. Fuck.

Fucking disaster, my guy. So in 2022, JJ Snack Foods Corporation announced that it was going to acquire Dippin' Dots for $222 million. Dang, that's a come up. Yeah, that's pretty good. They overpaid on that. That's crazy.

Don't case. Yeah. What would you pay for Dippin' Dots? You lose. What would I pay for the whole company? Fitty Mill? What would I pay? Nothing. But they have the vending machines of it. No, what you got to do. Here we go. Is you don't buy Dippin' Dots. Okay. Well, you do buy Dippin' Dots, but that's not your main investment. Your main investment is bringing back putt-putt golf. And then you get a cute high school girl. Interesting. To be in the middle of.

Of the Putt-Putt course. Because it's cute and it's family-friendly entertainment. Okay? And that's what we're bringing back here on This Is Important. Right. It sounds like a plan to just wrangle a bunch of high school girls at them. I don't know. Yeah, what the WTF? You get the high school girls. You get the cute high school girls. So, yeah, the way I see Dippin' Dots is... Is mostly with high school girls. So you start with one high school girl.

I disagree. Yeah, I think it should be a 35-year-old man in the middle of the golf course just overseeing. I do think that Adam's plan does not work at all unless there is just a high school girl in the middle of a putt putt. There kind of has to be a high school girl there. Which is a cornerstone of consumerism. Summer job. In California, you don't see a lot of high school kids working.

You don't see them working. Okay. I'm pissed now. And it bugs me. Go off. Where are you not seeing them? Where would you see them? In Newport Beach. You just don't see them. You don't see them. They're not hosts. Wait, wait. Who's working at fucking Yogurtland? It's not a grown man. Yeah, they are. Really? They're grown people. Yes. In Newport Beach, those kids are... They're adults. They're adults working.

What the hell? Yes. And in L.A., there are adults working. That's crazy. I know where you're coming from. That's what I'm saying is in Charleston, you go, you see teenagers working everywhere and it's dope. It's kind of cool. It's like, yeah, it's your first job. You should learn how to bus a table and be the host or hostess. And, you know, you don't give them any real responsibility. Right. But it's kind of cool to see teenagers have jobs when in L.A. you just don't see that. Is there anything better than like a...

a fucking stone stupid hostess or host who's like taking you it's like when you when you see it you're just you you you're like okay it's fine you're a stupid dumbass I love it it takes you back to I was just telling Chloe this the the Publix grocery store down the street from me here in Charleston I'm like it's either people that have Down Syndrome a lot of people with Down Syndrome doing people hosting

No, working the grocery store, working at the grocery store. Sure, yes, yes, yes. It was a lot of Down syndrome people. Yeah. Like probably five or six. And I was like, that seems like a lot. A horde. That's a horde. People with physical deformities. Yes, sir. Yeah. Physical deformities. A lot of them. I would say I counted probably three or four. That's a troop. You just described. And then the most stoned teenagers...

you've ever seen. You've ever seen, dude. And I was like, oh, that was me at my grocery store that I worked at. I love it. Just wildly stoned. Bro just walked into the set of X-Men. It was wild. I was like, well, I also was a little high. So, you know, when you're a little high, you're clocking everything a little too much. A little too much. Yeah. The walls start to kind of close in on you a little bit. No, no, no, no, no, no.

Not me. I smoke enough that they don't, man. They open up. Watching them interact with like people. It's just like maybe they're shy and stupid or both or whatever. But it's just always like, all right, cool. Like you're you're you're starting. This is it. Yeah.

You're entering the workforce. And I'm never rude or mean. Like, I'm taking it easy. I'm like, yeah, we'll need menus. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we're going to need menus. Yeah, they're trying their damnedest. And yeah, water. We do want water. Yeah, water's great. Yeah, there's one girl that works at this grocery store here that she smiles, but it's so brief. The smile comes and goes in a millisecond. It's like...

Yeah. And then she won't look at you. You're like, hey, how are you doing? I see her all the time. I'm at this grocery store constantly. Yeah. And I'm like, hey, are you an intern? How are you doing? And she's like, yeah. Is it cake? Is it cake? I haven't been in a lot. I'm working too much. I guess some would say I'm a workaholic. And then she just goes.

Just blips you. And then I just go, I was the star of Pitch Perfect. And she's like...

Do you love him? The fastest smile. Dang. I wonder what her deal is. Maybe she'll open up eventually. Blake, were you this person at the movie theater? No, I was actually... No, I could see Blake being like, hey, how are ya? On top of his shit. No, I was not. No, I was not. Today I'm dressed as Ace Ventura when nature calls. No, I'm not an extrovert at all. You guys know that about me. Yeah, but when you're on a good one, you are.

Well, I wasn't drinking back in high school. And I know you were all hopped up on soda and sugar. You're back there, you know, eating a little sugar. Well, you have it. Yeah. You hit your stride every once in a while. You were. I actually I was a host of a restaurant at BJ's. I used to like see people. Hey, but Blake.

That's when you were 22 years old. Yeah, you were a fully formed man. I was in college. We're talking 16, 17 years old. Yeah, but it was a really hard job, and I don't like you guys talking shit about hosts. It's really hard. We're not talking shit. We're saying that I want to see more teenagers. It's not hard. You literally go, how many in your party? Four.

Okay, you grab four menus. Right this way. No, no, no, no, no, no. What you guys aren't understanding is the politics of the restaurant. A lot of times the servers come up to you and they say, do not seat them in my section. Or they say, like, if you seat another person in Megan's section, I'm going to come over here and beat the fuck out of you, man.

it's like really it's a dog-eat-dog world out there because it's for tips oh so I'm mistaken all these people had death threats and that's yeah terrified dude it's crazy yeah I didn't know it's crazy and also I think Blake's making that up I'm not dude I'm not the servers really are very aggressive because they're working for tips I think Blake was making some death threats I wasn't I was really nice guy dude I

I was a really nice guy. Then you went Hollywood. Why are you saying that in past tense? Like you were a really nice guy. Well, because now I'm Hollywood, bro. Yeah. Don't worry about me. Don't worry about me. Blake's kind of off the board this episode, huh? Yeah. And when he goes to find it, it takes so long.

Oh, yeah, the bitch. Hey, in post, can we just shorten up the edits of the amount of time it takes? Sorry, dude. We're like, hey, he's Hollywood. And then you see him look off for like 15 seconds. Fuck it. It's hard. It's hard. Dude, it's a really hard job being the board guy and then talking to you guys is really hard. Well, I'm glad you do it because I wouldn't want to do it. So I'm glad you do it. Thank you. You guys keep me on my toes.

Yeah.

It is summer and on NPR's Planet Money podcast, that means it is time to grab your notebooks and your headphones and tune into the economics crash course for your ears.

Planet Money Summer School is covering the economic history of the world. From the birth of money to the Industrial Revolution to modern trade policy, we've got the lessons to keep you sounding smart at the beach with help from real economic historians. Every Wednesday until Labor Day. Listen to Planet Money from NPR on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

I didn't know we were going to go there on this.

People that I admire. When we say listen to your body, really tune in to what's going on. Authors of books that have changed my life. Now you're talking about sympathy, which is different than empathy, right? And basically have conversations that can help us get through this crazy thing we call life. I already believe in myself. I already see myself. And so when people give me an opportunity, I'm just like, oh great, you see me.

Me too. We'll laugh together, we'll cry together, and find a way through all of our emotions. Never forget, it's okay to cry, as long as you make it a really good one. Listen to A Really Good Cry with Radhi Dablukia on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. In a world where TikTok didn't exist yet, las películas no tenían color. The comedy of a genio mexicano crossed borders y conquistó the heart of America.

And his catchphrases are part of our culture, but...

Sonoro y iHeart's My Cultura Podcast Network present Nace una leyenda. Chesperito. I'm Felipe Esparza y te llevaré de viaje por la obra del super comediante Chesperito. From his television debut hasta la cima del éxito. ¡Síganme los buenos! Listen to Nace una leyenda. Chesperito. As part of My Cultura Podcast Network en la aplicación iHeart Radio, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you stream podcasts.

Guess what, guys? Guess what? Talk to me. I've been buying a lot of shorts. Yes!

Let's go. I've been buying a lot of basketball shorts. That shit's important. Okay, okay. And you wanted to get to this last week, and I guess we just forgot. Yeah, we forgot. Gotcha, bitch. So these are basketball shorts, or these are gym shorts? Basketball shorts. Gym shorts, basketball shorts. Okay, what is going on? Those are different things. What's going on? Those are different things, just to be clear. Yeah, they're basketball shorts, but I wear them to the gym. Basketball shorts, got it.

Very shagadelic. A while ago when we were on tour, you gave me one of the best compliments because you normally don't compliment what I'm wearing, Blake, because I don't dress that cool. I kind of dress just like a fucking regular-ass, boring-ass dude. Not cool. Don't have cool fashions. And Blake, you saw my shorts. You're like, whoa, those are really cool shorts. I love those shorts. And it filled me up. It juiced me up with pride.

When my boys gassed me up, filling up the tank, I felt good. I was like, let me vroom, vroom. So then... Wow. Perfect. Since then, I was like, I was coming here to Charleston. I only brought a few pairs of shorts, and I was like, I need some more shorts. Blake gassed me up. And then I couldn't. They were...

they didn't make any of the cool colors of the brand that I had before. So I was like, I got to dig deep and find some. So then I started looking up cool basketball shorts. My God, the algorithm, as soon as you do that, it'll push them towards you. Because I found a lot. I found a lot. So these are basketball shorts. These are basketball shorts. Old school mesh. Oh, yeah, mesh. Oh.

Oh, okay. You kind of got something that kind of looks like clouds. Yeah, they're like clouds. Can you bring those a little closer to the camera? Yeah, look at the mesh. I love a mesh short, dude. Perfect for hot. Hey, wait, hold on. I got to ask you, Adam, how hot is it over there?

It's very, very hot. I think we're, it's like in the 90s every day. The 90s. Very, very humid. Dipping dots don't stand a chance, bro. Yeah, and I'm not even taking tags off of them yet, you know? Okay, and now am I seeing Michelin Nest? What am I seeing? Where are these from? These are a brand that I just bought from Legends. Legends. Legends, mate. Okay.

I also bought a Legends t-shirt because I was like, oh, maybe I would buy a t-shirt. Yes, sir. But then on the back, it says Legends across the back. And I'm like, okay.

I don't really want a shirt that says Legends. Those are nice. That's like a paisley, like a burgundy paisley. Yeah, a little paisley. Get your bandana on. Get your Kendrick on. These are the ones I consider these are real heavy hitters. These are a floral print, but it's not knocking you over the head with it. And I might have spent a little too much money on these. Yeah, wait. What are these all running at? $70? Most are like $65, $70. Whoa. These are...

These are triple that, triple that. That's pretty crazy. These are like $240 pairs. I'm not getting a good focus on this. Wait, did you just say $240? Oh my God! Yeah, I might have went a little big time on these. No, those are not $240. They are, Blake. They are. What the hell? Are you serious? Who makes those and why are they $240? These are John Elliott's. John Elliott.

oh yeah yeah that's an insane amount of money for basketball shorts but that's that's john elliott that's 240 that's right blake that is right that is right even if i like them and that would make me not like them those are a designer play on basketball shorts you buy 240 dumb ass t-shirts no no stop it don't do that no no no no no no and i and i flip those you've never bought

a $240 vintage tee. No, no, no, no, no. I would never spend that much. No. Okay. He buys them cheap. He sells them high. Okay. Well, that's crazy. Why are those that much money? Why are those that much money? I have no idea. No, these are, these were very expensive and, uh,

you know i felt bad about it but then the fabric the quality sure is so much better so much better he turns into sebastian maniscalco they're gonna have to send me a pair just so i could kind of like understand why john elliott oh but dude i slid in their dms i was like i love your stuff and they're like thanks

Good for you. Everyone does. Good for you. Yeah, it's expensive. Who's John Elliott? I got to get on my John Elliott. Adam, how's your dot looking in these? Are you poking through? My dot. Oh, that's fun. Camo? Yeah, these are some camo prints. And is that John Elliott? No, these are not. These are a company called Arise. Arise. These are, I don't know, probably 60 bucks or something. You know, regular amount of money. Okie dokie. Kind of still expensive, but yeah. Nothing to hear. But, um...

Chloe doesn't really like these because she says I look like a fuck boy. Was her exact. It's giving fuck boy. It's giving fuck boy. Give me a hell yeah. And then I got a few standards. Jesus. There's more. You know, champion. Nice. High quality. White ones because I'm a brave dog.

Oh, yeah. You got to be careful with white shorts, dude. Do you? Yes. If you sit in your period and another. Hey, Blake, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, bud. I got this one on sale, but it is John Elliott. Oh, boy. How much? How much is that one? That.

That looks like a knockoff Spurs shorts. Yeah, they kind of do. Yeah, they're kind of. Why not just get it? Why don't you knock it off? Fuck you. No, I think that one was like one hundred and fifty or something. Yeah. It's like I got one hundred dollar discount. That's a steal. Wait, hold on. What is the John? What are those shorts doing that is any different than the champion one? They're better.

They're doper. They've got cooler color combos. You saw the floral print. That was kind of sick. Those were dope. They were dope. Those are cool. And basketball shorts, I mean, they're going to be basketball shorts forever. That's true. They're going to be basketball shorts forever. What does that mean? They're durable. They're durable. They're durable. They're durable. They're durable. It's not like a t-shirt where you wash it a few times and they look like shit.

Basketball shorts kind of just look, they hold there for a long time. They're going to lose their elastic, right? Waistband when it starts going. Well, the elastic is like, but you can replace that. But is that what you do, Blake? You replace the elastic in your basketball shorts? You can if you really love to pair. Is that what you do was my question. I don't, but I don't have very expensive basketball shorts. So I just like. By the way.

I said I went down a rabbit hole. I'm not buying a ton of those expensive basketball shorts. I see. But you know why I'm not? Why? Is because they all sold out and I couldn't get any more. I tried. I really tried. I was actually really sad. I was trying to bust the bank. And so I want to throw this out there because I only work out in shorts that have the built-in brief. Hate those.

Absolutely hate this. Because then you're only, A, I don't want to do more laundry, and B, like, fucking underwear, it's just, there's too much, it's too much fabric, it's too much, too much stankin'. No. That makes sense to me. Too much hot, hot heat on my dot. Mm.

It's very hot. Hot on your dot. I got a hot dot. Hot dot. This is the thing. I have two different things. If I'm just working out like lifting or like gym, then I don't wear stuff with a built-in underwear. Adam, this is how we get in shape like him. If I'm running, I do need the net. I need the built-in undies. I need to be very snug when I run.

I need my balls to be really close to me. I hate the, because they never fit me properly. Well, your dick is a monster. You're a monster. And so it ends up like not being able to come over my ass. Yeah. Like I can't pull it over my ass. Wait, wait, can we pull that? I'm going to come. Can we pull that audio? Like that clip? Come over my ass. Come over my ass. Can we pull that clip? I'm going to come.

I'm going to come. That's why I've always hated the inner lining. It sucks. It sucks for me. And how do you feel about this new biker short lining movement? Because I can't get on board with that because I feel like

You hike it up so it's supporting your nuts and your dick, and then slowly your legs pull the fabric down, and then your dick ends up just kind of down under your nuts in a way. You guys are going to want to go on our YouTube to see Ders explain this. Please subscribe to YouTube because it's a visual thing. Smash that subscribe. Smash it. What happens to your dick? I want my dick up and to a side, and when you wear the biker's,

It just creates a pocket where your dick just goes straight down onto your nuts in the front. Right, right, right. Kind of like tucks into it. And then the fabric of the shorts kind of rides up on the bikers. I don't know. Who loves this biker shorts movement under the shorts? I don't like it. I think Ja Morant.

I think it's Ja Morant. It's Ja Morant. You think Ja Morant is the one who started the biker short movement? I'm talking about the built-in-ness where it's part of it. Yes. The first time I noticed it was Nike and they're like, Ja Morant shorts, and then they had the bikers built in. Oh, so he's one of my favorite basketball players. Yeah, you rock. Mostly for his gun violence. Yeah, it's fucking cool. That's kind of why I follow his story. He's your favorite shooter. He's my favorite shooter. He rocks. Shooter, shoot.

Shooter shoot. Yes. But now I guess I don't like it because I fucking hate them, dude. Right. Oh my God. It just makes it hard to buy things. It's like when the skinny jeans became super popular and it was just hard to find pants that fit my body. And it went that it was that way for 15 years. I remember it affecting you in ways. Yeah. Yeah. It was so hard. I,

I couldn't actually buy new jeans. I couldn't do it online. I had to go to a store. That's why I had 13 pairs of Lucky Brand jeans. Right. Lucky you. That's a lot. That is a lot. That is a lot. Hey, when I go all in on something, I go all in. I want to say that if you did have 13...

You wear like two or three of those, right? Hey, lucky 13. Isn't it though? Lucky you. Yeah. Not seven. That's a lot. And they got you. And, and, and we also saw, I mean, he had 13 pairs of basketball shorts. There's more down there too. Uh, they just were in the dirty hamper. So I didn't want them out. Are you wearing two pairs a day? Like, why do you need so many shorts brother? I work out every day. Okay. That's obvious. That's obvious. And I come your shorts. Yeah.

I always jizz in my shorts. Sure. No, I, you know, I just, I fell, I'm a, you know, I have an addictive personality. I'm not able to do crack anymore. Be the alcoholic that I used to be, which sucks. It sucks. We all hate it.

It sucks. Everyone hates it for me, too. People are like, oh, you're not chugging tequila like the rest of us. You're a bitch. And I'm like, I know. I do know that your personality is actually super boring. It's super boring if I'm not drunk. No, his personality is Budweiser built by Budweiser. Who am I? Oh, dude. Oh, so. Oh, so real quick. And we'll talk more next week about this. I'm going to go to Medellin, Colombia and get stem cell treatments.

What the hell? Yeah. Right. I'm going to Medellin, Colombia. Why and what and why there? And what is what? What's happening? I have heard that Colombia's medical services

situation is like super dope down there and that's why everybody has like plastic surgery. Yeah, it's super duper dope. What if I came back with a new face and be like, it was just stem cells. Hot, hot, hot, hot. I wouldn't do that face, but yeah, you could come back looking insane. They say after a few months, it'll settle. Yeah, it's supposed to settle. I have no wrinkles. Yeah, be good for the pod. So apparently there's three dope...

There's one in Panama. There's one in Tijuana. And then this one, which I've told is one of the best ones, is in Colombia. It's called bioaccelerator.com. What is this for? Sorry. This is for your... My body, my health. Okay. And my autoimmune thing that I have. Okay. Under the hood. So, yeah.

yeah so apparently it helps with autoimmune diseases it helps with regenerative growth of like muscle muscle damage uh damn it thought for a second we gotta tell celine dion bro let's yeah fuck i mean i'm sure i'm sure she might know yeah she might know it's science but i don't know yeah i'm really excited about it i i think i'm gonna go uh in august so this is uh they like

inject the area with the cells and the cells glom on and go to work like little doozers? I mean, I talked with the CEO of the company last week just to be like, I'm coming, I'm doing this. And he's like, okay, good. I'm going to come. Yeah, absolutely. I'm coming. Do not come. And then it won't come over my ass. Fuck it!

So I talked with him, and then I have a consultation with the doctor, essentially, on Friday. And then I'll tell her all of my ailments and figure out the best way to use my teeth. No, I'll call. So wait, are you going to make a little vacation out of it? Because that place that you said, where was it again? Medellin, Colombia.

That sounds like a place that would be kind of cool to kick it for a week. Super dangerous, I think. I think there's danger to it, but there's danger to every city. Danger is my middle name. I'm just going to wear my $250 basketball shorts. Yeah, dude. Leave the Rolex at home. Fuck it! Yeah. Wear Rolex on each wrist and just play it by ear.

I got the stem cells and lost my hand. Someone hacked off my arm. Well, so for sure, this is like a little city that's super cutty and then like really rich people roll in to get their bodies fixed. They see you coming a mile away, right? Yeah. Like, oh, it's a workaholic. That's all right. He's going to roll up like coming to America. It's bumper.

Well, what they did tell me is they're like, it's connected to the hotel is connected to the medical facility. So you don't. Interesting. And then this super high end mall. I love it. It's all connected together. And so they're like, you don't have to actually go outside if you don't want to. And I'm like, because it's that scary. I'm like.

Is that a selling point? Because to me, I'm like, I want to see where Pablo Escobar lived and go do the thing. You want to find the hippos? Oh. Those hippos. Is it really? That's what we're talking about? That's where Pablo's from? Medellin, Colombia. Yeah, yeah. That name, I feel like I've heard it, but I don't know the history behind it. Well, did you not watch Narcos? I didn't. No. What the fuck? Really? Yeah. It ends with the guy getting a butt lift. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah.

No. You have to go watch... It doesn't? It doesn't end with... I'll tune in. I'll tune in. It seems cool. Now that I have context, I want to see where my boy is going. That sounds awesome. You didn't watch Narcos. Dude, why not? I never watched Narcos. Oh, I was... There was a time in my life when I wasn't watching anything. I was only reading...

I'm not buying that. Lots of books. Lots of books. No, there wasn't. Did you watch Narcos? I started it and then I was kind of not into it. See? It was so good. Adam, you're obsessed with cocaine and stuff. To me, it's not that cool. I'm not obsessed. Adam, you have a higher tolerance for TV than I do. What does that mean?

Like you are willing to just start and go all the way through. If you start, you're going to finish. You're committed. You're in. That is true. I start getting offended. I am rewatching House of Cards right now. That is like that is a dense rewatch. You're a Kevin Spacey guy. You're in. Huge. Kevin Spacey guy. That's another one where I started that show and then he like turns the camera. Zach Morris styles like time out.

these fucking people, dah, dah, dah. And I was like, Oh, I'm about to go fuck the dude at crafty. I don't like this show at all. Now. I like, I like that. He does it. I know. I'm sure that's fine. Uh,

But Narcos is really, really cool. No, I do think I would really like that show. And anyway, so it's... Medellin, Colombia is where Pablo Escobar is from. Crazy. Yeah, yeah. So I would like to see, you know, do a little sightseeing, but I've been told it's kind of dangerous. The block is still hot out there. I also was told that I can get...

cocaine. It's giving murder. I could get bodyguards to take me around. I'm like, hilarious. Oh, hell yeah. Hilarious. You gotta do that. Maybe I will. Let's go! And there's no doubt that they're gonna rob you themselves. That sounds fucking cool, dude. You know what? I hate talking about countries like this. I don't like it. Because I'm sure there's a fucking zillion wonderful people in Colombia and there's few bad apples. I bet it's awesome.

And I bet it is dangerous for tourists. I don't like shitting on countries. They, we look like marks. I think it will surprise you. When I went to South Africa, they were like, the crime's crazy. And I go, okay, but like, I don't want to shit on the whole country because there's a few like people that have cut your arm off. Cause you go to Cape town and people are, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Even though Portland was pretty scary. Yeah, so that's kind of the big news in my life. I'm going to find out more, and I'll keep you guys abreast to that. Okay. It's kind of exciting. Have fun out there. Abreast is the word of the week. I have people that have told me that have gone there.

A fellow actor. I'm not going to say his name because I don't want, you know, I don't know if he wants it out that he does this. I have no idea. Right. But he was telling me he fucks hookers in Columbia. He goes there and he just fucks hookers. No, he goes. He did it. And he's an actor and he does like.

the like a seal team type shows and movies where it's like action. Every episode is a damn action movie. You know what I mean? Yeah. It's Chris Pratt. So he had a bad back and he was like, my back is so bad. I was thinking about retiring. He went down there to this clinic, did this treatment. They fucked it right up. And he's 90% better and he's back doing it. He's like, he's like, I'm back, baby.

See you. You go on their website and Tony Hawk is like he went down there. He's it like cured him. It cured his son, Riley, who had a bad back. Yeah. And then it's like a huge laundry list of I guess Joe Rogan goes down there and a lot of the UFC guys. So wait. So wait. You were and I want Blake to get ready on the board for this one. You were talking about Tony. Oh, yeah.

Huck to it. Oh, that's cool. I think I said Tony. Huck to it. And his son, Riley. Huck to it. Cool. Spit on that thing.

That's really awesome. Before we go, Adam, I have to ask, since we're talking television, are you partaking in Clipped at all? The Clippers documentary series? No, I'm not. I will. I will. I think I will get around to it, but the reviews were really bad, and then also... They changed the name of it. Yeah.

Also, I feel like I just lived through all of it. It's weird that it's just happened so... They made it too quick. I was like, make it in 10 or 15 years. Like, just all... What is the series focusing on? It's called Clipped. It was when... It was about... Donald Sterling. Sterling. The owner of the Clippers. And he was racist. And his weirdo girlfriend... V Stiviana. Yeah, his...

weirdo mistress fashion icon go ahead yeah she wore the bear coat but then they show the players and they're like this is supposed to be blake griffin and you're like what yeah they don't look anything like not even close oh this is like oh yeah so it's just from a few years documentary it's a thing no no no no it's um who's playing doc rivers uh lawrence fishburn right uh

And then my boy Ed O'Neill is playing Donald Sterling. Yeah, he crushes it. Does he? He's really good. I'm sure he is. I mean, he's a good actor, but I mean, the show doesn't look great. It's cooler if you watch it. It's cooler if you watch it and you think of it as Al Bundy, like his future. Like it's in the Married with Children universe. Wow, yeah, I'm sure I would like it a lot more. It makes the show really good.

Any take back? No, I think we stuck the landing once again. We did it again. It's kind of crazy. Wow, look at us go. I would like to take back speaking on behalf of Robert De Niro's penis. The word of the week is penis. Poop dollar! I would like to take that back. How come? I'm just curious.

Yeah, is there a word that you want to get to? Yeah, supersede is the word I was going to try to squeeze in. And I could have, I think. I think that word might have slipped past. I mean, I think, to be honest, at De Niro's age, having a baby at this age, he must have a supersede. And this is another episode of

Yes, points! This is important! It's science. It's a bagel. Yes, points! Hear that? Pumpkin. That's fall calling. And the pumpkin spice latte is back at Starbucks. From that first sweater to late autumn weather, it's all a fall in just one sip. Order ahead on the Starbucks app.

Does money stress you out? Let Facet flip your financial chaos into clarity. Finding Facet immediately put us at ease. Facet's innovative approach to financial planning ensures your money works as hard as you do, enabling members to experience the joys of having your finances in order. That makes us Facet for life now, I guess. Visit Facet.com.

FACET.com to learn more. This ad is sponsored by Facet. Facet Wealth is an SEC-registered investment advisor. This is not an offer to buy or sell securities, nor is it investment, legal, or tax advice. These testimonials are from current Facet members who are not compensated. All opinions are their own and not a guarantee of a similar outcome. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp.

It's a simple truth. No matter who you are, mental health challenges can affect you and how you manage them can make all the difference. That's why everyone should have access to mental health support that meets them where they are and helps them get through. BetterHelp provides online therapy on your schedule. It's flexible, simple to use, and more affordable than in-person therapy.

Connect with a licensed therapist selected just for you. Learn more at BetterHelp.com. That's BetterHelp.com.

If you're a smoker or dipper looking to make a change, you really only need one reason to do it. But with Zinn Nicotine Pouches, you can find many. Zinn is America's number one nicotine pouch. It's made with only six simple ingredients. Plus, Zinn is the only nicotine pouch with a 10-day hassle-free trial. There are lots of options when it comes to nicotine satisfaction, but there's only one Zinn. Find yours in online or in a store near you at zinn.com slash find.

Warning, this product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical.