Chapters

Josh Brolin recounts a prank he played on Mary Steenburgen while filming in Austin, where he tricked her about her call time, sending her in the opposite direction of the set. Steenburgen got her revenge by having the wardrobe department progressively take in Brolin's pants, leading to a hilarious revelation.
  • Josh Brolin pranked Mary Steenburgen by misdirecting her about her call time.
  • Steenburgen retaliated by having Brolin's pants taken in over several weeks.
  • Brolin's prank involved impersonating a second A.D. and changing Steenburgen's call time.

Shownotes Transcript

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More to see, more to do, more to enjoy. Visit ncl.com, call your travel advisor or 1-888-NCL-CRUISE. Restrictions apply. I'm one of those guys that if I see somebody that I was with for a long time, I'm like the happiest person

I go, oh my God, hey! You know, and they're trying to hide behind a thing and face it, and it's in front of their face. And I'm like, oh my God, how's your life? Are you joining, kid? It's me, Josh! My new baby! Isn't this crazy? Welcome back to Where Everybody Knows Your Name with me, Ted Danson, and Woody Harrelson, sometimes.

Today is a woody day, and our guest is one of our favorite actors working today, Josh Brolin. His films have grossed over $6 billion worldwide. That's just irritating. No, sorry. I don't know why I said that. I'm not the jealous type. He's worked with many of our greatest living directors, the Coen brothers, Oliver Stone, Spike Lee,

Paul Thomas Anderson. He was the voice of the most famous villain since Darth Vader, Thanos. Recently, he was in Dune II. And he stars in the fantastic sci-fi series on Amazon Prime called Outer Range. Outer Range is now in its second season. Please check it out. Mary and I were glued to the first season. It's an amazing, amazing show. Anyway, I can't wait to share with you this conversation with Josh Brolin.

You worked with my wife, Mary Steenburgen, who we all know is a very honest person. So these stories will be true. Yeah. My understanding is you guys were making a film in Austin and you, who are really good at impressions and doing other people's voices, called up as the second A.D.,

and told her that her call had been changed and sent her in the exact opposite direction of where the set was. As far as possible. Yeah. So she then called the office and said, really? I thought this was my day off. And they went, it is. And then...

fell into place for her. And your comeuppance, can I tell the story? Do you remember your comeuppance? Probably not. That's such a good one. No, I do. You do. Here's Mary's comeuppance. Oh, I can't wait. Which was, by the way, a genius. Genius, yeah. She, uh...

Everyone was enjoying all the food in Austin, but going, oh my God, we're going to gain weight and all of this stuff. And I was supposed to be in shape. Yeah. Which I was. And you were in shape and all of that. Mary goes to the wardrobe department and says, here's what I would love you to do.

Once every two or three days, take his pants, his Levi's or whatever, the same pair that you kind of wore all the time as a character, take it in about half inch every two or three days. But make sure to leave the same number on there. Yeah.

Right? Don't, don't fuck it up and like get a different pair of pants and have a different number. So. So you would come out. This is a two and a half week long process. Yeah. And I, and she knew somehow that I was like sneaking fried shit in,

in Austin during that time. Oh, that's great. So you were concerned about your work? I was concerned because I started asking people, I go, do I look bigger to you? No. No, you look good. You look good. I said, really? I don't look big? And then I was doing this. Stretching that. Yeah, I was doing this. I'd walk around.

Doing squats. Yeah. Trying to stretch it out. Maybe they washed it too much. Don't wash my pants anymore. And everybody's really good about keeping the secret. We're dying laughing. Then finally, towards the end of that two and a half weeks, it getting worse and worse for you. She said, okay, go the full Monty. You know, just really take it in. And

They could hear screams inside. Yeah, dude, because it only went up to my knees at that point. I literally, it was not, it was a night shoot. I'll never forget it. I went from a 32 and I think it was down to a 27 or something. And I got it to my knees and I literally felt red rage at myself. You fat, like you undisciplined,

And I was jumping, trying to pull it up and pull it up. And finally the door slams open and I scream, wardrobe. I have to take it out on somebody else because I'm an actor. And there was Mary and like 30 people right outside the door. What's wrong? Cracking up. What's wrong, Josh? No, they weren't even saying what's wrong. They were cracking up. But she did say. Pointing. Yeah. She did tell you to check your front pocket. Yeah.

And there was a note inside the pocket. Was there? I don't remember that part. It said, gotcha. Oh, baby. Maybe you're right. The gotcha was on there. I was very proud of her. That's very good. That's really good, actually. When you're a young actor who's looking up to other actors, and Woody was one of those actors, and Sean was one of those actors, Nick was one of those actors that you literally look and you go, God, if I could do...

If I could do work that's that dangerous, that's that visceral and emotional and dangerous. You know, you did work with Sean and I believe nominated in your work with Sean. On Milk? Yeah. I worked with him on Milk, yeah. Part of that role came out of you and me and your wife and Eddie Vedder and Sean seeing...

into the wild in, or maybe no country, in Toronto.

And then we all had a night together. And then Matt Damon was supposed to play my role in Milk, and Matt had a conflict. And then Sean said, what about Josh? And I think that came out of that night, which was quite a night, by the way. You're so compelling and interesting to watch. Like, everything you've done, I just, like, I love watching. And, you know, you playing W, like, I got to admit it. First, I'm like, how is Josh Brolin playing W?

you know that's good bush like you just couldn't seem more different yeah but what a performance that was thanks man what a fucking performance and oliver too who you've worked with yeah in a big way you know that was at that point you know it was it was you trust somebody you just trust that they're gonna i remember he wanted to do something a much more like hammering

And I was like, why isn't it more interesting to look at this guy and have that

see the humanity in him and be even more confused about this guy who ended up, who was the forever misfit who ended up as president. What's that? And then look at what we're dealing with now. The ultimate misfit. That's, you know, it's like, there's a, there's a parallel for sure. But I, it's, it was fun to get into that. It was fun. I didn't leave my house. I literally left my house once. I went from my house to work, to my house to work.

Because I was so scared about not getting it right and just staying in it, staying in it. I never understood that thing about like staying character and staying until that. And you're like, you don't want, you don't want to talk to anybody. You don't want to, you just want to stay in that zone. You are really good from my point of view, impersonator, mimic, whatever, dialects. Did you work on Bush characters?

A lot? Or was it forever? Forever. I mean, that's the... Were you just like listening to his speeches? Just listening to his speeches and trying... What was it? What's the... There's that thing on the computer, GarageBand.

And I would tape myself and then listen to myself. I did the same thing when I did Tommy Lee Jones in Men in Black 3. It's an impossible accent. It's literally the most insane, schizophrenic, Lee-created and structured accent because you have this guy who's like, yeah, he's a cowboy, but then he also went to Harvard. And there's a confusion in there that is so personal to him

Yeah. And contrast. Yeah. So he has this lilt, this cadence that you couldn't figure out. Yeah. And I literally for like days, maybe even weeks, trying to get one sentence. And it's the same thing with, it wasn't as tortured with, because when you got it, I remember I used to walk around and I'd go, there was a word, America, America. Yeah. And I would do it all the time on the set. Yeah.

Elizabeth Banks would follow me around and go, America, America, America. Yeah. Yeah. That's when I remember when Bush said his explanation for why, you know, they flew into the towers.

They hate freedom. They hate freedom. They hate freedom. I look forward to a day where women and fish can coexist. You're like, what the fuck did he just say? What? As an ocean advocate, I appreciate it. And women's rights. There you go. But, you know, and then Sam Rockwell also, he did it later in the movie that he did with Christian Bale. What was it called? Vice. And he was great.

He's fantastic. Very different, but fantastic. It's funny. That's the one thing about being a director that I got off. Because being an actor, you know, I'm not a very competitive guy. I think I am innately. But when you're with somebody and then you so you're with actors, it's different. Like old school people, it's different. Then you got your new actors and there's always this kind of weird.

There's like a thick kind of viscous air. You know what I mean? Of competition? Of competition or something. So anyway, my point is that I never really enjoyed working with actors. A few.

but not a lot. And, and when I was directing, it was so much fun to work with actors. Yeah. Cause I think I love celebrating people. And yet with actors like now they're waiting to be celebrated. They're waiting to be caressed. Do you know what I mean? And then when you're directing actors, they look like they're just shitting their pants and they're

You know what I mean? There's insecurities and all this that you're seeing and they don't even know, they're not even conscious of it. And you're coming up and hopefully being able to facilitate them being more comfortable with being naked and exposed. And that was really, really fun.

That's so cool. I'm so happy for you, man. Can't do that as an actor, you know? Hey, man, you know what you should do? You look a little like you're being insecure. Can I help in any way? You seem really secure in this scene that you're doing with me.

It must be demeaning for you. You know, you've worked with a lot of great directors, but what about working with Oliver? I just specifically got to know what I don't think I've talked with you about it. Maybe I know. I don't think we have. Yeah. Like,

That's a very unique person. Very, very... And a brilliant person. Brilliant person. Breakdown unique. You're laughing. What is unique to you? One time, you know, when I was doing Natural Born Killers and we had this scene where it's like inside a pharmacy and the cops come and they're like, you know, and they shoot out all this glass and I'm like running as they're shooting out all this glass. These giant windows, huge. Yeah.

three huge fucking windows as big as this whole wall here. And, uh, and so, and I'm supposed to be running and then I, you know, jump behind something and, and, uh, and Oliver says, uh,

Because of the glass and everything, he goes, this is an hour and a half reset. Don't fuck it up. Rolling. I'm like, motherfucker. That's my pep talk. That's the opposite of what I'm talking about. Literally. There's no support. I can't imagine you being that kind of director. But what was it like, I mean, to be directed by? Did you guys ever butt heads? You must have butted heads. We did in the beginning.

There's something about, and this is, I'm saying this objectively. There's no ego in this. I don't think. I think that there's something about me that I've learned through the years that scares people. Do you know what I mean? There's like, oh, he's really fun and funny, but if he wasn't, it would probably not be good. And I think Oliver picked up on that. He's like, yeah, definitely. Woody's definitely that way. Definitely Woody has that. Yeah.

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I know there's, I won't say who they are, but there's certain directors of movies that, you know, there's, I don't know how you guys feel, but there's like, you know, you'll hear, this is a really important movie for you to do, which I don't, I don't understand. I don't think, you know, you choose to do whatever you do and you don't know where your career is going to go or what, you know, is going to, you know, the most important movie and then nobody sees it. So apparently you didn't really know and I thought you knew. So I usually go back to me.

And go, you know, is this appropriate for me to do right now? Do I want to do it? Am I into doing it? But I did say no. And it wasn't entirely based on that. Maybe I had some other things going on, but it's okay to say no. And I think ultimately, when I look back, I think it's maybe because of those no's.

that people went, why did he say no? I want to work with him and see if he'll say no. Can I take you back here? You've talked about drinking or sobriety. What was a, was there a, oh my gosh, what will my creative process be like now that I'm sober? Was there ever a, maybe some of this great stuff I'm doing is because I'm drinking, you know? No, no, socially, yeah.

i think i got a lot of jobs because of what or at least that's what i think it's probably not true because of how i was socially when i drank it was fun until it wasn't fun yeah and then so no it was more socially i mean even men in black three and i know you run tapes in your head to try and justify the continuing of your whatever you're doing that's quote unquote working

But I remember, you know, Barry Sonnenfeld saying, I heard you do a Tommy Lee impression when me and him and the Coens were out. I didn't even remember doing it, which turned into me doing that movie, which the studio didn't want me. They wanted Wahlberg.

But, you know, and then I kind of auditioned for it after I had gotten it. I saw this little setup and I didn't really understand what was happening. They said, we would love to hear some of the words. Like we're rewriting. And I realized it was like a second, not even a second, our first audition, even though I had already signed the contract. So there was this mistrust or distrust or whatever it is. But I think, yeah, it was socially. It was never...

No, I knew that my, that I was on perpetual LSD anyway, just in life. Yeah. And that, and that it was socially that I didn't know how to, I'm like, okay, so when you're sober, like I've heard my dad say it. He's like, if you get like, what do you talk about? I heard Will Patton say that he goes, you know, uh, he was working with Kevin Costner and they asked him if he wanted to go out and Gene Hackman. And he goes, but what would we talk about?

And you see the fear in his eyes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like real fear. Like, do you get through a minute of like, and then we did that. And now what? There's the rest of the dinner. Yeah. Yeah. And I think I've gotten beyond that. I think. Yeah. Yeah. You know, they talk about hitting bottom, you know, and I was doing shit at 15 that was far worse than what, you know.

So that last night that I drank, there was a hit and run at Del Taco. There was that. There was, I woke up on the sidewalk. I didn't know where my car was. And it wasn't that that was rare. That was just, you know, the 400th time that it happened. It was so normal when I woke up.

But my grandmother, I was supposed to be at my, my grandmother was on her deathbed. I was supposed to be with my, I was supposed to have picked up my brother and taken them because I was the kind of, I was the fam, I was, I was the one in the family that put everything together and structured everything and controlled everything. Anyway, I woke up on the sidewalk, went inside. My brother called me, where are you? Picked him up.

walked into that hospital eventually. And my grandmother, who was 99 at the time, picked her head up. Everybody knew when I walked into the room, picked her head up and looked at me and smiled. And that was it. I was done. Wow. I said, if this woman could get through 99 years on life's terms, how dare me?

That's a great phrase on life's terms. On life's terms. I said, how dare me? And I'd gotten away with, I was 45 years old and I had done, you know, I'd gotten away with a lot. Been in jail nine times, you know, done a little bit of stuff, you know, whatever. So I thought, I wonder if I could do that half of life like that and then do this half of life like this. Then I get to live two lives and not just one.

Well done, bud. That's cool. And do you ever, like, when you go out and you're hanging with people and they're having some wine or whatever, do you ever say to yourself? Never. Not that you're going to drink it, but do you ever? No, no, no. Never? You don't ever feel like. Like I got to leave right now? No, no. Or I start convulsing? Or I start convulsing? No. Can I smell it? Do you ever feel like. Can I smell your glass? Yeah. Right. Can I smell your mouth? Stick your nose in there. Different story. The bouquet.

But do you ever feel like, Jesus Christ, man, like I am dying to have a drink? No. You don't? No. Because the decision's made and it's just... No, it's not even the decision. I feel like something's been cultivated in me that I helped cultivate that my life now is better than my greatest romance of any drink I could have. Yeah. I actually like my life. Not that I didn't before because I loved it before.

except when I would write indecipherable texts. I didn't like that. In sobriety, everything is possible. I just, it's that, and it's, I remember about four years and I wasn't looking for it and I wasn't trying to cultivate it. Four years into sobriety, I remember when my older kids, my kids who are 35 and 30 now, trusted me and I saw it in their eyes. Something, so before that, it was always like, you know, dad,

You know, dad, he's crazy. You know, everybody talks about Josh being crazy. Josh is on edge. Josh is this, Josh is that. And I lived off that. I loved that stuff because otherwise, if the people aren't talking about you, you're invisible. You don't exist. You have no character. You have no, you don't exist. I've gotten used to it. That's awful. Don't say that. But then you get to a point where you get like,

Fuck it. I'm interested in walking through this, walking this labyrinth. I want to see what I can create out of this, this cauldron. This message is brought to you by McDonald's. For the first time in 50 years, McDonald's is unveiling a new Big Mac.

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Thank you to our friends at Samsung. They sent over this new OLED TV for the studio here. We actually watched some cheers on it. I don't know how that happened, but I got to tell you the details, the colors and the contrast. I was noticing things that made me feel like I was actually back on the set. Brass railings, Tiffany lamps. You had an amazing tan that really comes through. You had great skin. I have. I have great skin. That's what I said. That's right. That's what I said.

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And can I go back to, because I want to, the Cito Rats? Yeah, Cito Rats. Cito Rats. What is that? You guys did your research? Oh, Montecito. Montecito. Is that why Cito Rats? It was Montecito. Montecito, which is perceived, which I think it was then too, like some rich kind of, but it wasn't like that then. But there was a group of guys. So I don't know if you ever heard of the Bra Boys.

In Maruba. It's a, it's a, it's a kind of a, it's not a club, but it's a group of guys. And it was a time around the same time. And they all, they all had tattoos, my brother's keeper. And they're in there. You can see a documentary on them and it's kind of an amazing, and I know all those guys.

I know all those guys from those different surf cultures. So there's Dahui in the North Shore, which Eddie, you know, Rothman, I know really well. I know Kalav really well. I know, you know, all those guys. So there was Dahui, there was Wolfpack, and then there was Seto Rats, which was our guys. And Santa Barbara. But you, like, saying, you just...

There was kind of an amazing mix, like rich, poor, famous parents. Yeah, there's only a couple of those, but then there were other, you know, there's like Jason Sears, who was the singer of Rich Kids on LSD. Yeah.

that was a punk band, a hardcore band that ended up doing really well. And that was our group. That was from the Sitorats. And then there was, you know, like a dad who owned a restaurant in the area. And they were just different economically. They were all over the place. A mechanic. There was the O'Donnells. The dad was the mechanic in the area. And it was just, I think because it was the 80s, there was a lot of

And I don't say this from like a victim point of view, but there were a lot of parents that were kind of just doing their own thing. There was a lot of partying going on. So kids were just kind of left to their own, you know, demise, at least in our, in our, you know, so we banded together. Probably 11 when I met those guys, they wasn't the Cito Rats yet, but it was me and Jason and Mike Herbert and a few other guys and Will Moeller and

And then that around 13 or 14 turned into a thing. And that went on until it didn't exist anymore. And you guys would all go surf together. We would hang out at Butterfly Beach all day, every day. We would get up when we had school, at least in the beginning, we'd get up probably 4.30 in the morning, ride our bikes down to the beach with our boards, surf whether there were waves or not, end up in school, sleep in school, get out of school, go right back to the ocean, surf.

Like it was every day and then all weekends. But yeah. It sounds kind of idyllic. It's kind of amazing if you think about it. And now it's some, and there's always this kind of tragic ending, which is horrible. But, you know, a lot of those 36 of those guys, probably out of 50 guys died during the heroin epidemic and during some other things, car wrecks and drinking and

and all that, but amazing human beings, man. I mean, like literally a family that you would hope for.

True loyalty. And I think that's something that's like bled into my life. And I get off on that, you know, rallying people up. And I mean, we were like that on No Country. You know, Javier was sitting in his haircut and his whatever in his one bedroom apartment with the shades drawn and, you know, dark. And you're just like, bro, you got to get out of your fucking head. I'm never going to get laid again. And you're like, come on, it's going to be fun. And we go, me and him and Woody would go out and we'd have a blast.

I like that whole communal thing. Yeah. I've always liked that. It's one of the great things about this business. Like when you do a project and you come together and it's so tight, but then the worst part of it is it ends. Like I'm going to see you and we're all going to get together. And then suddenly, where is everybody? It's the weirdest. And I think my daughter, going back to my daughter becoming an actress, would call me after a movie or something and saying, what is this feeling?

And I was like, ah, that's that thing. Because you get so close to people. It's so intimate. And you don't, especially if you're doing projects that are good, then you're more exposed than I think you would be if it was some...

You know, not to put like some series or some cosmetic whatever that you were doing and it didn't have any kind of creative, you know, possibilities or outlet. You get super close. Yeah. I got super close with him. Super close with Javier.

You know, super close with Kelly McDonald when I did Dune recently. I mean, there's like some of my closest friends. It's wild, though. I think it's really wild with Javier. When was No Country? Like 18 years ago or something. And then you get older and then you do another movie together. Like the idea of a director saying, what if we got Josh and Javier in the same movie again?

You're like, that's really cool. And then these old guys show up, you know, and it's not as I think the the mentality toward the work is different. You know, I think back then it was like, not that it's not now, but all in. And now it's like, this is what we do. This is what we've done for 39 years. And this is what we do. Then we go home.

Was it an odd thing for you? I'm sorry to interrupt, Teddy. No, no. But, you know, like having James Brolin as a father, being this incredible actor, and as a kid, you were like...

I know you kind of grew up a little away from that, you know, the Hollywood vibe, but what was it like? Like definitely like a shadow, you know, shadow where you want it. And I think it was a good thing for me because these were very, you know, our trajectories are very different. But I think in the beginning it was always like, oh, you're Jim's son. I mean, I remember there were, that was one time or two times,

It was a casting director that said, oh, you want to, I walked in and I had, you know, a couple of monologues that I had learned. And she said, like, I don't remember who it was, but she said, so you want to be an actor, huh? And I go, yeah. And she goes, aren't you Jim's son? I go, yeah, he's my dad. And she said, oh, okay, well, act. I go, what? She goes, act. And I said, well, I have a couple of monologues and all that. And she goes, that's what I thought. Thanks for coming in.

And I was like, what? And that's the flip side of like, I'm not going to help you because of this nepotistic thing that we know happens and which is impossible. Like we all know it can get you in the door in the beginning. And then if you don't prove yourself, you're boom. That's it. Yeah. And nobody knows that nobody cares. Yeah.

So I think that that idea, because of things like that happening, you have this blanket that you think exists and there's a couple of different proofs that it does exist. So you're like, okay, I'm going to go do theater. And I met this guy, Anthony Zerbe, which was probably the best thing that ever happened to me, who's my best friend who I just saw. He's 87 now. I just saw him. I love him. We just had breakfast together and he was somebody who,

We did this series called Young Riders, which was a Western. And every kid on that series, after you do 22 episodes, what is it called? The hiatus. Everybody, you know, you want to do a movie. Got to get a movie. Like, this is all building this thing. You have to build this structure. And Zerbe came up to me and he said, come with me to Rochester, New York and do a play. And I was like, no, man, I got to do a movie. I'm like, I'm going to fall way behind.

in the race you know and i did and i ended up doing he had this thing of three plays and rotating rep three new plays and rotating rap i do two of the three and i did that for five years

Every summer? Every summer. Then I started doing other theater beyond that. He was kind of a mentor, wasn't he? I never looked at it as a... I think now it's like, of course, he was a mentor. But he was just one of those guys that I'd get up to go to work and I'd open my front door and there'd be 17 plays or books. And you'd go check this, and I'd read every one.

and you go there's william blake and here's this and read these poets and then read the read these plays read mammoth read this read this so i got this kind of great education in my early 20s that i don't think would have happened had it not been for him yeah fantastic great person amazing human being yeah yeah i agree yeah did you talk about your mom yeah all the time wasn't she an animal activist mary mary's prodding this story about

Somebody who, was it a reporter or somebody came? She had big cats. Tell me, talk to me. All right. So I just sold this book. I just wrote this book. I just sold it to Harper Collins and it's not published yet. It'll be published in like a year. And I wrote a bunch of stories and some of it's prose poems, some of it's, you know, and you, I remember reading you poetry back in the day. Yep.

And then they're just stories. But as we got to Kimberly Witherspoon, who's at Inkwell Management, who's my lit agent, and she said, you know, there's a lot of stories in here about your mom. And I go, yeah, she's a big personality, had a big impact. And then she goes, well, do you want, like, maybe we need to focus on other people. And I would try. Anyway, I totally, the whole point before I get into my mom was,

People have an impact on your life and people have an impact on your life when they're bold enough to say what is on their mind. You know, other people won't. People will say, no, I don't want to create a thing. I don't want to make you feel insecure. My mother was the opposite. My mother had zero filter. So as crazy as she was and she was absolutely fucking nuts.

Um, she was, uh, she gave something to me that allows me to, um, open the pores of whatever filters exist. And I'm really grateful to her for that. So she was animal obsessed and, uh, she ended up working with Fish and Game and she was a way station for all animals that had been illegally taken out of the wild. And, um,

And they tried to domesticate them. She'd find those people, have them jailed, nurse them back to health and either re-release them or find the most habitable zoo. So we had a lot of animals growing up. Big cats. Big cats, wolves, bears, all kinds of stuff. I mean, there's one, there was a guy who was working on our ranch up in Paso Robles, California, Bud Applehance.

And my mother was five foot two from Texas, from Corpus Christi, Texas, and had a voice like as deep and severe as any man's voice you've ever heard in your life. And so Bud Applehand, she got this tiger in. Was it a tiger? Yeah, it was a lion. It was a lion with a big mane.

And she got, and it was only for like a week or something. And she told him, she said, look, he's not eating. You have to go in there and show him how to eat. You have to sit next to him and show him, put your face in the bowl and show him how to, he needs help. And, and, and my dad was like, my dad just walked away. And, and, and Bud goes, you just want me to get in the thing and just sit down? I mean, he didn't know any better. Poor guy.

And so he goes in there and she goes, well, sit next to him. And he's like this and the thing's just sitting there with a face on the paws. And she goes, now put the bowl up to your face and then just lower your head like you're eating. So he's like, this is a tough, tough dude, country guy.

Like that. And then he gets up and the lion goes, you know how they look up like a dog and they just go one eye, the other eye, the other eye. And then he moves forward and she goes, oh good, he's moving, he's moving. And he moves toward his thigh and the lion opens his mouth, these fucking four or five inch long fangs and then slowly closes the mouth around the guy's thigh. Around what? The guy's thigh.

and you hear the rip of the jeans,

And you hear, and Bud's going, his teeth are going into my leg. His teeth are going into my leg. And my mom, when she would get nervous, she had this thing. It's like a condition where she would laugh hysterically. So you hear, the teeth are going into my leg. The teeth are going into my leg. And she's trying to talk, but she can't because there's just wheezing with this laugh. And she's got a cool king in one hand and a Dr. Pepper in the other hand, which is always what she had.

And she's trying to say, don't move, don't move. But she can't because she's laughing so hard. And the lion just kept its teeth in there for a while, looked up a couple of other times. He didn't move. And the lion slowly lifted his mouth or opened his mouth and then moved back to where he was. He said, get me the fuck out of here. And that was in a nutshell. And I haven't told that story a lot, but that was... That's Mary's favorite story. My brother got 60 stitches in his leg.

From animals. Fell in with the animal because we had to do it. You know, it was one of those when you give your kids, you know, you want them to like a normal, like you as a parent, you know, you get out there and you're like, you know, pick up the hay or go feed the dog. Yeah. We had to feed the wolf. You know, it was a different deal, man. Go clean Lefty's cage. But I'm eight. Yeah.

You know, and you're raking and you're looking and you go, if I look too directly in the eye, it's a challenge. Yeah. But if I look away too much and if I don't make any eye contact, then I'm like that cartoon with the steaming chicken. Yeah.

Yeah, man. And then you go out into life and you become an actor and it's all good. All those skills. All those skills. So, yeah, she was she was she was really she was something else. She was something else. She went out with a truck driver for six or seven years, looked very much like my dad.

Um, he, he, he used to truck for union 76, spent a lot of time with him. I spent a lot of time in, in, in, uh, truck stops and my mother didn't fly. She only drove and she wanted to go constantly. She was constantly moving. So it was like 50, 60,000 miles a year, you know, but she'd wake us up at two in the morning, which was not uncommon, you know, cause she was from Texas and she'd,

She'd wake us up at two in the morning, my brother and I, my poor brother. I could deal with it. I was easy at the war thing. And he was like, why? Tears kind of welling up in his eyes. And she'd go, let's go to Whataburger. It's like fucking two o'clock in the morning. We have school. She'd go, I need a Whataburger now. Let's go.

And my dad, I'd hear my dad upstairs like, oh, you know, like putting it like trying to hide behind a dresser or something. And we'd go. And that's not that's not bullshit. We spent four or five days on the road and we go get a Whataburger and we come home. And then I get a note and Josh was sick or whatever. And I miss her, man. I miss her because she was a big she was crazy while it was going on.

But it was, you know, there's still people who come up to me and they go, God, your mom. I miss your mom. I miss that in life. There's not many people, especially in this day and age of extreme fear and uncertainty of how to act. It was nice to have somebody who just didn't. It's not that she didn't care. She just couldn't help it. How about that? She couldn't help it. Yeah. Yeah.

I love you, buddy. I've missed you. I missed you. It's really nice.

Really nice to catch up a little bit and see your face. Are you still writing poetry? I'm just writing all the time. Do you sing? Does it go to song ever? No, like my daughter writes really well and it goes to song really, which is a beautiful voice. I had a band when I was like 24, but it was more like a, you know, scratchy voice blues band. But no, it never, I don't need it to translate, you know?

Somebody said something about, I've always taken pictures and do you want to do a photography exhibit? And I was like, no.

Writing is what I do. Writing is my thing. Writing is the number one love. Scripts? No. Yes, I have, but that's never the point. But did you do more prose or what? Prose, stories. Poems. It used to be more poems, not so much anymore. More prose, poems, and stories. Yeah. And I think the writing's getting better, and I think doing this book...

was the best thing that ever happened to me because you're not just writing for yourself, but you're writing for somebody else, which has a totally different, you know, and I, and I've become a better writer because of it. I've become a better technician because of it. And it's fun to, to, to write in the way that I do and actually understand the grammar around it and how I can best utilize what, you know what I mean? Yeah. So it's been a good, it's been a fun road learning how to be a better writer, but yeah. Wow.

Will you tell me something really quick? Because my first instinct when you reached out to me was that you guys have always been really close. We were, well, you know, we'd make each other laugh for whatever it was, eight years together on Cheers. Nine months out of that year, you're showing up every day and playing and having fun. And yeah, Woody, for me,

Because I didn't have that older brother, younger brother thing. Yeah. Woody was my older brother, younger brother thing. It was all the brothers. Where, you know, that kind of, if you don't have a younger brother, older brother thing, you don't know how to compete. Yeah. You know, and he kind of taught me how to compete.

And yet know that there was, he probably wouldn't kill me. But he might because of the brotherly thing. It's worth the growth. I got to taste that with Woody, which I love. But then we would see each other.

in a smoky haze once or twice a year, you know, and it was lovely. It was wonderful, but never really got to hang like this. And I, I mean, I hear stories from you, Woody, now that I had no idea. And it's just a joy to hang around.

So this is a bleed over from working together and that thing that we talked about, about how you get so close with people. Yeah. The intimacy level is so high. Yeah. And then afterwards you go, what happened? Yeah. And that's not something you always felt like it was a major, major loss, not staying that connected with him. Not that you could have.

But not having that day after day after day. Yeah, I think so. And also, I mean, loving somebody or whatever needs to be fed. Totally. You know? Totally. So it's, yeah, I love Woody. Well, not as much as I love you now, having spent whatever it is talking in this kind of setup. Yeah, it's been a real gift for me, I will say, Teddy.

Me. Good. And, you know, and now we get to hang with Josh. Like, you know, I hardly ever see him. You know, it's yeah, we got to spend more time together, dude. I know, man. It really makes me so happy just hearing you, you know, your stories and talking and like I miss that. I know. I know. Last time we saw each other was at the Academy Awards. That was the last time. Me, you and Javier. Yeah.

which was a nice moment. That's that moment where you go, yeah, 18 years ago or 17 years ago, this thing that was inseparable. Oh, it wasn't because of that. It was 18 years later, you were all at the Oscars. We just all were there. And we saw each other and it was like, you know. Yeah. It's an amazing thing for those who aren't actors to be

In this tribe and acting and doing a job together, it is so intensely intimate. It is. Even if it's fleeting sometimes, it is. If you're doing your job, you're opening yourself up as honestly as you can to the other person to let them in. And I love the idea, I think now especially, and as a 55-year-old guy especially, and as somebody who has older kids and a four-year-old and a two-year-old,

I love this idea. I don't know where this comes from, but of like, why does it have to only be on a set? So like I'm the guy when we're writing, when I'm with a group of guys or a group of new guys writing our choppers or whatever in this old vintage, which looks like an affectation, but it's quite not. And then it's usually the biggest guy who looks like he's spent half of his life in prison. That's the first guy I'll go and give a big hug to and maybe a kiss on the cheek.

I go, where are we going to take it from there? I think that's the part of my mom that came through because I'm like, why does it always because I work less because of the kids, I've cut my workload probably in half. But that feeling to me is everything. I know. I'm nodding my head when you say choppers. You got to tell me what you're talking about.

choppers motorcycle motorcycles but real choppers oh vintage oh i had you hanging out of a bell helicopter no no no choppers so much happier like yeah 1937 knucklehead 1968 shovelhead 1956 oh really yeah wow like old old

And amazing. They break down always. We're going to go to Virginia City at the end of the month. It's like a thousand mile ride. We'll break down 17 times before we get there, but it doesn't matter. The one time I had a motorcycle was like a 19...

47 Canadian army bike with a sidecar. How great is that? Yeah, it is cool. It is. Except I was never allowed to ride a bike ever. And the only time I did because of my parents was in this movie, Cousins, where my character rides that thing around. And little did I know that it was a Harley too. And you need to be an ace rider.

ace mechanic to have that old a bike. So it became a flower pot in our backyard. Just a bunch of parts everywhere. And flowers growing out of the sidecar. Yeah. Hey, can I ask you a question? I just wondered about this. You married two actresses. I did. Why would you marry two actresses?

When you think after the first time, I'm not going to marry another actress. But then it happens again. I mean, I love Diana. No, I know. I'm just saying it's kind of wild. That's a good question. You married an actress. This is not a popular question. Can I withdraw it? No. No, I like it because we talk about this. Not often, but we talk about it because not only that, I was on top of that.

I was engaged to an actress, and then I had a couple of actress girlfriends before that. I'm one of those guys that if I see somebody that I was with for a long time, I'm like the happiest person

I go, oh my God, hey! You know, and they're trying to hide behind a thing and their face, their hand is in front of their face. And I'm like, oh my God, how's your life? Are you joining, kid? It's me, Josh! My new baby! Isn't this crazy? Remember you and me and the sex? How crazy was that? I'm doing that with her now. Life is so much fucking fun, isn't it?

That's really how I see it. And I realized that not other people, most people don't see it that way. And they're like, please go away. Please about face. That's great. But fuck it, man. It is a crazy fun life. And that's what was super interesting to me when you called or when you texted me.

And I said, there's no reason to do this. And I listed all the ways. And at the end of it, I said, I'm in. Because it sounds to me like you guys together

I'm all in this bubble at the beach right now. We're not doing anything. It sounds perfect. Yeah. It sounds perfect. On my end, what happened was I felt awkward asking you. I know you said. You called me out on it in this great, great, no, wonderful, poetic, late at night voice message. Memo. And I didn't...

I didn't. At one point you said, and sure, I think was the word or something. And kids, we were surrounded by grandkids and would come screaming through right at that point. So I went back and listened to it two or three times. And every time I couldn't tell if you said sure or not.

And so, and then the fucking thing disappears. I didn't know voice memos disappear. That's what's great about the voice memo is you leave it and if you don't save it, if it goes to the end and if you don't save it, it just disappears and it fucks everybody up and it's so much fun. So these guys, I asked these guys, yeah, maybe ask them, but I don't,

I don't know. I don't know if he said yes or no, but ask him. Of course I would say yes. Of course I would say yes. Why not? Well, thank you for doing this, buddy. Thank you, guys. You really mean so much. No, I'm glad. It fills me with joy to see you, man. Me too. I'm the same. It's nice to see you both again. Thanks for this. Thank you for many things. Of course.

Well, there you are. Josh Brolin, thank you so much for being with us today. Be sure to check him out in Outer Range on Amazon Prime. It is amazing. I've seen the first season and was riveted. He gives a brilliant performance. That's it for this week's show. Special thanks to Woody and to our friends at Team Coco. Tell a friend if you like the show and give us a great rating and review on Apple Podcasts if you feel up to it.

We will see you next time on Where Everybody Knows Your Name. Take care. You've been listening to Where Everybody Knows Your Name with Ted Danson and Woody Harrelson. Sometimes.

Special thanks to Willie Navarrete.

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