cover of episode The Dumbest Internet Debates

The Dumbest Internet Debates

2024/5/17
logo of podcast Burdie Stories

Burdie Stories

Chapters

Shownotes Transcript

Internet Debates I've seen so many debates pop up on the internet over the last decade, and today I figured we'd go over some of the worst internet debates. Some things I don't understand why it's even a topic of discussion. First on the list we got 2D vs 3D.

And this shit has been a debate on the internet for a long time, even though this should not be a discussion at all. It's clearly the Discord mods that are voting 2D. I don't know how somebody could be so sheltered to the point where they're attracted to a drawing over a human. You're telling me you would see this girl right here. What if she asked you out? There is no dude on this planet that would be like...

and my waifu at home. Sorry. I was curious. What is the mindset of a 2D enjoyer? I don't even know what to call it. According to them, it is perfection in two dimension, and the third dimension just ruins it. What's scary is there is an actual group of people who believe this. Some people make memes like this for fun and games, just trolling. But there's some dude who actually...

Married his anime waifu not even trolling I don't know how you could walk around in public with an anime doll and not feel embarrassment and shame mom dad

I humbly suggest you save some money and shop Amazon for back to school. It's for my growth, meaning my body's growing at an alarming rate. And clothes you buy me this year will be very small very soon. Plus, the clothes I love today will be out of style tomorrow. But at least your wallet doesn't have to be my fashion victim if you shop low prices for school at Amazon. Hopefully this is helpful. Amazon. Spend less, small more.

This episode is brought to you by Experian. Are you paying for subscriptions you don't use but can't find the time or energy to cancel them? Experian could cancel unwanted subscriptions for you, saving you an average of $270 per year and plenty of time. Download the Experian app. Results will vary. Not all subscriptions are eligible. Savings are not guaranteed. Paid membership with connected payment account required.

And a lack of connection. It's a doll, bro. What the f***? How do you even build a connection with that? Don't you want to build connection with a real human being? I wonder how that wedding went. Oh, well, I take you to be my lovely wife. I am yours forever and always. Are you going to say it back? Please say it back. Shut the f*** up.

Just imagine how disappointed your parents would feel because you decided to marry an anime body pillow and you like 2D woman over 3D woman. I'm just gonna be walking to a coffee shop one day and then I see a dude with a VR headset on just talking to himself. Is that really where the world is headed? Like that is actually crazy. And now don't get me wrong. Growing up watching cartoons, I had a bunch of cartoon crushes. I'm not gonna sit here and lie.

To say that it's better than 3D Woman is a crazy take. And it feels like this debate is one big joke. But who has this much free time? Seriously, who is making this chart? I don't know, bro, but whoever it is, they probably got some hot-ass breath. The dress. I'm sure when I said that, a lot of you probably had a crazy flashback. People were debating whether this dress was black and blue or white and gold. Dog, it's clearly black and blue. How the f-

How is this even a question? Or, I don't know, maybe I'm just dumb. To the people who see white and gold, tell me how, because I seriously don't see white and gold at all. And around this time, Yanny and Laurel also spawned in. Apparently it was supposed to be like, which one do you hear, Yanny or Laurel? They were both playing at the same time, just at a different frequency.

Laurel was at a lower frequency and people at my school were like dude. It's yanny, bro What are you talking about? Nah, man, it's laurel. Yo, who's team yanny anybody? Okay, it's not that serious console wars this one I understand because a lot of the consoles have different features and different games on it So I get why people would pick a certain one But there's no reason to have beef with somebody over what console they choose to play Like it should just be a agree to disagree type of thing

Ever since video games conception, there's always been some kind of console wars going on. And it's insane that people hold an ego over other console users. If you decide to buy an Xbox instead of a PS5, oh my god, bro, you're broke. Or there's that one guy that just butts in and says... This episode is brought to you by Shopify. Shopify.

Forget the frustration of picking commerce platforms when you switch your business to Shopify, the global commerce platform that supercharges your selling wherever you sell. With Shopify, you'll harness the same intuitive features, trusted apps, and powerful analytics used by the world's leading brands. Sign up today for your $1 per month trial period at shopify.com slash tech, all lowercase. That's shopify.com slash tech. Ah.

hey man pc is clearly superior we didn't ask for your opinion pc is a completely different ball game why are you getting involved in console war and they'll tell you the whole statistics they'll give you the whole lore of their pc well my pc runs at 64 gigabits of ram while your console is stuck at 60 fps i have a pc but i'm not gonna on you for not having one i use it to make videos

Man versus bear. Now, this is a debate that's been going around on TikTok recently. And the debate entails that when you're in the woods alone, would you rather run into a man or a bear? And now on the surface, the answer seems pretty obvious, right? Nobody is picking bear. We're trying to live here. If I run into a bear, I'm getting eaten alive.

But if you'd rather run into a bear, I mean, shit, bro, that's on you. But me personally, I'm trying to find my way out of the woods. And me and my homie I just met, we're gonna find our way out. We're dipping. Like, that shit is scary as hell by yourself. But apparently, a lot of people are choosing bear. They're saying the guy would do weird stuff. Like, bro, this is a hypothetical situation. You do not have to think about it that much. Goddamn. It should just be...

based on the average guy and the average bear. Some TikToker street interviewed people about it, and I feel like this whole thing was just set up to stir the pot. Some people are going as far to say, like, if you choose man, you're never gonna find love? I don't know what this has to do with love.

But whatever. If this turns into a TikTok clip, nah, I'm about to get fried again. That's crazy. Next, we got sitting or standing. I saw this happen a couple years ago. And a lot of people were making videos asking, do you wipe standing up or sitting down? And it was a question on everybody's mind. Am I a weirdo for wiping sitting down? That was a thought that I had to myself during the aftermath of Burrito Night. I questioned the way I was living this entire time.

You're a danger to your community. You're a danger to the world. You're a danger to all. You're an absolute psychopath. So I stand up and it just, uh, yeah, it did not feel right at all, bro. What the? For those of you that wipe standing up, I don't know how you can live your life like this, bro. It's not that serious, but you know what is serious? People were debating whether to wipe or let it crust. What?

So you're telling me that people walk around every day with doodoo crumbs in their ass? That is insane, bro. How the hell do you not have to get new underwear like every week? And of course this became an internet meme and it just became a big running joke, but some people actually do. Maybe you standing wipers out there, you know, I can understand, but Lenny at Crust? You are absolutely despicable, bro.

I guess some people don't want to use toilet paper, bro. At least use a bidet. It's weird as fuck with the water squirting up your ass, but it's better than nothing. Next, we got iPhone versus Android. Now, this is debate of the ages right here. This one has gone way outside the internet, honestly. It's like nowadays, if you have anything besides an iPhone, you're getting fried. Even though at the end of the day, a phone is a phone. Androids just get memed to death for the bad camera quality.

I mentioned this in my last video, but yeah, it's gotten to a point where girls see it as an ick to have an Android. If he's going for the number and he pulls out an Android, he's done, it's over. Like this right here could be your 10 out of 10 dream husband and you would reject him just because he has an Android phone.

And me personally, I never really understood why this mattered so much. Maybe I just have a different perspective on it because I was that one dude with a flip phone in the seventh grade. That thing was old as hell. It was an ancient brick that barely worked. So you can really only imagine how much I got roasted. I mean, the only reason why I preferred an iPhone over an Android is because iPhones are easy as hell to use. When I open an Android, it feels like I'm trying to operate heavy machinery. And as we know...

Yeah, that wouldn't go well at all. Next, we got the whole pineapple on pizza debate. That shit is not good at all. I don't understand how you could put fruit on pizza. Fruit and sauce. That is a disgusting combination. A lot of you might be like, oh, how do you know? You never tried it. I did. And I did not like it one bit.

Pineapple slaps. It's good. Just not on pizza. There might be a lot of pineapple on pizza lovers watching this video. Hey, that shit tastes like ass to me, but you do you. Maybe one day this video will age like shit and pineapple on pizza will grow on me. Next, I don't know what to call these, but I'm just going to put them all in the same categories.

Is water wet? Is cereal a soup? Is a hot dog a sandwich? Debates that make you question reality and how you see the world. When you really think about it, it opens your third eye. Is it really a sandwich? I don't know. Because it is bologna between a piece of bread.

So it could be a sandwich. We just don't know for sure debates like these went viral in 2017 Especially the one about is water wet both sides were going crazy. And uh, yeah, the answer's no it's not I guess people didn't understand that water was the thing that made the objects wet But the ones about hot dogs and cereal that one still got me stuck to this day. I'm not gonna lie Are we living in a simulation? This has got to be one of the craziest ones on the list. I mean, I don't

really see how we would be, honestly. People are thinking humans are computers. To be honest with you, there are some bots out there. Like, you just look at them and you're like, there is no way that person could be human. I mean, I personally don't think so. I don't know, my mind might be too puny to comprehend this theory. Like, some dude could be typing up in my comments, dude, you're just stuck in the matrix. You need to wait the fuck-

This is way too deep. I'm not trying to get philosophical over here. Are there more wheels or doors in the world? Now this one, I just stayed the hell out of because listen, there's no way I'm sitting there for so many damn hours trying to calculate how many wheels or doors there are in the world.

In my personal opinion, I feel like this one's a colossal waste of time. And people's answers were changing every day because there's more wheels and doors than we expect. Like, I forgot there was wheels on this chair right here. Do we count closet doors? How would we even get the number? I just don't know. Like, I would have to be seriously blasted to take the time to think about something like this. That's probably how this idea was made, honestly. Two dudes were sitting there high as hell and they posed this question. I don't really know a true answer, but if I had to guess, I don't know, I gotta say wheels.

And do we count the wheels on toy cars too? I guess we will never truly know the answer. But this debate right here is the most perplexing debate out of all of them. And it is so controversial. And I probably still don't have an answer to it. And so many of you are probably waiting for me to mention this. Gay son versus thought debate.

daughter bro we getting canceled with this one every year or so this question pops back into existence in my friend group and we just sit there and talk about it we ponder because we need a final answer but when people ask this question on the internet there's a lot of people who actually like get pressed about it because at the end of the day bro it's just an internet debate it's really not that serious but say i were to answer gay son people on twitter would start typing their paragraphs misogynistic oh my god i can't believe it women should do what they want with their bodies

And if I were to pick dot daughter, oh my god, are you homophobic? This is unbelievable I mean after all this is a hypothetical question. So if people get mad, I mean that's on them These are all hypothetical live your life how you want. I don't really care But one thing you should never do is let it crust Yeah, people smell like ass is one of my biggest pet peeve if you want to see pet peeves that drive me Absolutely insane then click on this video