Deep Dive
Shownotes Transcript
Welcome to this episode of Emergency Intercom. I don't know why I'm nervous because this door is open and people are not constantly walking by. You are so nervous about the public in Paris. I know, because I feel like they're very...
Judgmental of Americans, which I feel like most places are. Also, if you... Did we even say welcome? I think we did. Welcome back to Emergency Intercom if we didn't. Well, welcome to this episode. We are currently in Paris. Obviously, because... So obvious. Like we said, we're desired, we're wanted, we're loved, we're needed. Yeah.
These brands just love us out here. Acne. They're obsessed with us. It's so weird. Loves us. It's weird. Like you need to grow up and get a life because why are you stalking me? You're a stalker. Yeah, we were here for the Acne show. It was amazing. Gorgeous. Beautiful. Loved every second of it. Obsessed with the bags.
In love with the bags. Need the bags. I'm literally wearing jeans from them right now. Oh, yeah. My shirt is from them because. Also, this isn't sponsored. Yeah. No. Just wanted to clarify that. We did come out here with them for the show and it was fucking awesome. And now it's our last night. It's our last night in Paris. What are we going to do? Leave it up to us to leave it to the last minute to do anything for work. Calm the fuck down. I don't know if it was obvious. Calm the fuck down.
I don't know if it was obvious. Calm the fuck down. I love fashion. It seems like you don't because you're buying bootlegs. Babes, you don't know anything about bootlegs. This is like so real. Well, the police are here to fucking get you because it's illegal to make and sell bootlegs. It's also giving like this might be the loudest environment we've ever recorded in. I'm almost like we should check.
But I think it's OK. It's we're adding to the atmosphere. Just imagine this. OK, use your thinking cap. If you're listening and not watching, here's what's happening. We are in a Parisian apartment. So gracefully lent to us by our friend Rain. We're in. It's a Parisian night. You're out with us. You're having a few glasses of wine. You're saying things that in the morning will make you so embarrassed. And you won't ever bring them up to us. And we won't ever bring it up to you.
Okay. Big bleep. Why? Why is that a big bleep? You're a big bleep. You're a big pain in my bleep. Did you hear that? Big clock? It's a big bend. Wait, did they move the big bend to Paris? No, it was always in Paris. Oh, I guess I just am not as well traveled as you because your life is a movie. I have seen the world. Compared to me. I've seen the world. Yeah.
So you're at this Parisian apartment with us. We invite you over. We're all drinking, but you're like embarrassingly drunk and it's so embarrassing, right? You're like... It's disgusting. They won't shut up. Like you're saying things that in the morning you'll regret saying so badly, but we'll never bring it up to you because we're not mean like that. The vibe is just off. Like it's a little sinister, like not really complimentative environment. It's really just like...
You're getting torn to shreds by these people. Yeah, and you're like... But you're trying to make the best of it because, you know... I don't even know what we're saying anymore. Oh, I was giving the viewer a hypothetical that they're here with us. I'm setting the mood for the audio listener. Did you know like 90% of the world can't understand hypotheticals? That's not true. It's probably like 40% of America. That's not true. What do you mean they can't understand it? Like they can't visualize it? They don't have the IQ to...
literally process that information like if it's it's like a goldfish if it's not happening to them then and now they cannot process it there's literally no way yeah is it the same people who like can't like if you're like oh think of an apple they're like they're maybe thinking of the word apple but they're not imagining an apple
When I think of apples, I think of the computer company and the iPhone company because I'm rich. No, that's because you're addicted to your black box. Yeah, it really is crazy. I just every once in a while, I just have to pick it up to look at it.
Getting on the iPhone is so fun. Like, turning on your iPhone and looking at it and, like, falling into abyss. After a long day, like, laying in bed and getting on your iPhone. In dead silence. I really do support it. And I think it gets a really bad rep because people don't healthily use it, myself included. But those moments where, like, you've done a lot of good shit for the day. Like, you got work done. You, like...
communicated with people I don't know like I you literally sound like a robot like you know after a long day of work and maybe some play and communicating with the other people literally that is like how my mind works I'm like okay damn like I talked to someone today like this is fucking lit um just laying in bed with no one around or even laying in bed with like a homie and just being on iPhone and not saying anything to anybody is like
Top 10 experience. Yeah, like the two generations ago, their thing was I kick off my shoes, I have a beer and I sit back and I watch the games. Our generation is I get home, I have an edible, I stare at my iPhone for eight hours. It's 2 a.m. I need to sleep. And go really deep on the...
drama all a-list celebrity i literally am a part of bleep nation yeah we're low-key pro bleep nation yeah um but i think all a-list celebrities are evil villains now um and there's no ifs ands or buts so if you ever see me get to an a-list status um you're evil just know i've turned to the dark side and i'm sinister it's not even that i think all a-list celebrities are like evil but like
I was we were talking about this earlier. I genuinely do believe and this happens, I think, in every space and work environment. And it's just natural when you put a bunch of humans together where that's kind of their community. It becomes high school. There's no way for it to not become high school. And it just will inevitably become that. Hello? The fucking killer is out there.
Somebody walked by really close and I got scared. The killer. The killer is coming. There's just no way for it not to become high school and like there's like gossip and like rumors and like all these things. So it's inevitable. Blink has a crush on Blink. Yeah, like that kind of vibe and there's no way of going around it.
But the fun thing about being like a citizen is getting to watch that unfold on your iPhone. And that's why iPhones are so important to the community because where would we be without iPhones? Think about that. Like we would not be here without like we wouldn't be here without an iPhone. Wow. Yeah.
And this episode is sponsored by Android. Thank you, Samsung. I love a good Samsung Android like sponsorship and somebody acting like that's the phone they use. Like 100% is going to be me if they reach out. Swear to God, I would text only I would throw my iPhone away for a week. Y'all will see me sell my soul to Samsung. I swear to God, like if they reached out.
I'm using the Samsung. I used it in high school. Oh my God. That was my most embarrassing arc ever was like, everyone had iPhones and I was like, I'm going to be weird and different. Like I need to be different. And I tried so hard to be different. Yeah. I tried so hard to be different that I got like the galaxy note five and it was like a giant, yes, it was a giant fucking iPhone that came or a giant fucking phone that came with a stylus. It's really fucked up. Um, it's,
purely my vocabulary that's it but I um got the galaxy note 5 because the screen was giant it came with a stylus and the photos that I took on that thing are the worst photos of me that's ever hit the internet and I got rid of it literally within the week like it was so bad because I know what are the photos and it makes me crack up to what's the name of the phone again galaxy note 5 galaxy note
They're on note 20? Yeah, they're indie. How are they on 20? They just wanted a number bigger than that. Why is no one talking about fast technology? Yeah. That's the real conversation. Think about all the lithium that was mined for those phones. Drew, this is crazy. As big as fuck. Oh my God. Actually, my dad had this phone. My dad had this phone at that time. Twins. My dad and mom both had this phone in the gold.
I think I had gold too. I had a smaller Android like Samsung phone. And here's what I would do if I got my Samsung ambassadorship. If you're from Samsung, ignore this because this isn't true. I would just do what I did in middle school. I had my in like ninth and 10th grade. Yes, I had or no by 10th grade. I had an iPhone, but whatever semantics not important. I'm genuinely curious how many people who
who are listening have android yeah let us know literally i'm sorry but like somebody with the flip one today in a cafe braver than the marines like flipping it oh she was doing the whole thing she was i love keep putting on a show she felt me watching she was like she was like you want to see how much this shit could flip like i got an ipad no i have a flip no whatever it was no i have android users are braver than the marines and like the ones that like
I love the ones who fight for it. You're lying. It's not a choice. I'm sorry.
But you do you. That was the most elitist thing I've ever said. But I don't give a fuck. It's talking about phones that cost the same amount of money. Yeah. Get a goddamn fucking iPhone. It's not like that big fucking weird iPad shit that you fold up and put in your back pocket is any cheaper than an iPhone. You could have got an iPhone, but you want it to be like a Freakazoid 3000. And that's okay. You do you. But I will be making fun of that because why a phone that flips four ways is
Unnecessary. I think a piece of paper can only fold 16 times before... So we'll get to 16... Or no, it's 7. So we'll get to 7 folds in a phone and then it's done. Yeah, it can only fold... Where would you get 4, though? I don't think so. Yeah, it's the one that, like, the really big, like, iPad one. It just opens like this. Oh, I thought that one... Okay, so I'm mistaking. There's the one that's shaped like a regular phone that folds into a cube. And then there's the... The book one. Right. Yeah, but...
If you use an Android, I love you. I really do. And Samsung, if you want to sponsor me, I'll do it. And I'll just in public, I'll use it. And then I'll go home and use my iPhone like it's my dirty little secret. Next time I get on a long haul flight, I think I'm going to make the journey into bringing my wing bot on the plane and cause so much turbulence that our plane drops a little. Not a lot. Seven feet. Yeah, just like seven feet. Enough to get you lifted out of your seat a little.
And then I'll turn it off and we'll be back. We'll be back to regular airspeed. There's no way this audio is okay. Yeah, I know. It's really bad back there. We should just shut the windows. It's really easy. But it's like the aura, the areola. Do you want to shut it? I think it's doing more damage than good. Well, let's talk about... This is my first time a little inebriated. Rita Ora's tweets.
because is that what you were doing while you were away back in I don't know what it was probably like 2013 2014 it was like before the internet was really really cool and everybody had it and like Twitter was just becoming a thing and Rita Ora tweeted on her account if this post gets 20,000 retweets I'll post a single from my album and
- I'm gonna wait, why am I gonna post that right now? - It literally got nine retweets and then the very next tweet she posted, "Guys, it's really not cool for you to hack people's accounts and say you're gonna leak my album. Like do not do that."
I'm going to post that right now. Literally me when my acne post flops and I turn off the likes. I'm just going to turn off likes and then block everybody who's following me and then turn them back on when like 300 people are following me and my posts are getting 21 followers and then reopen my account to the public and see if I can start from scratch. If I had to start from scratch, I think I would easily go from a million followers to like 150 at max. Like I think 150,000 people.
And that's pushing it. That's a lot. That's not because it's I'm not I'm not giving content out on IG like that. I'd maybe get like a thousand and three hundred and two. That would be my guess if I had to. If I had to guess. Yeah. Yeah. Right. I'd probably get half a million. Well, that's because you're a clout chaser. So you would probably just like use and abuse people like you usually do. No one talks about that.
He's a user and he abuses friendships for flights. How do you think he gets everywhere he goes? Yeah, I don't give a fuck. He sneaks onto jets all the time. Yeah. He's a chronic jet set by sneaking onto jets. And it's really obnoxious. Jet. You know, Bleep Nation can only hold you at so many times. Sneaking on jets. That's how I got to Paris. Let's see those notes.
I love your confidence. I didn't take any notes for this episode. So if it's all over the place, that's why we recorded like three hours ago. So my brain is empty. We recorded like seven episodes in three days because the last episode we tried to record it 14 fucking times. And every single time it failed, whether it was actually check that thing right now.
oh my god i'll kill myself down i will kill myself in front of all of you i will change the trajectory of your life i will and i'll have any upload it it's in my will it's in my i would sell it on dvd i would sell it on okay okay i was gonna say if you want my money collector's item release it to the public um not for free but i have paris fashion week note rita aura tweet about getting hacked
And I love your confidence because I think saying, oh my God, I just love your confidence is the meanest fucking thing you can ever say to anybody. Beautiful, beautiful gowns. Beautiful, beautiful gowns. Do you know what that is? It's Anita Frank being. Oh yeah. You and Josiah are obsessed with it. Yeah. Like being asked about like different singers and they're like, what do you think of Taylor Swift? And she goes,
Beautiful gowns. Beautiful, beautiful gowns. Like that is so crazy. - So slick. - It's like if someone was like, "Oh, do you think Enya, like what do you think about Enya?" So fun to be around.
Nice, nice shoes. That's actually a really big compliment to me. Nice shoes. Oh, yeah. Someone said I was fun to be around. I would start twerking my ass. What ass, babes? The big fat one in my pants that actually hurts when I sit down because it's so fucking big. It spills over the edge. Well, Drew has eaten McDonald's three times since we've been here. I don't need French food.
Like, I really don't need it in my diet. What I need is French McDonald's in my diet because it's new and different. I don't need to be real. I need to be Coca-Cola. Yeah, I need to be McDonald's. No, I had it three times. The first time was fucking great. I was super excited because I had it before and I was like, oh, this shit's, like, really good if I remember correct. Yeah, it's delicious. The nuggets taste like fucking... It's corn! They taste like cornmeal. And then the...
The fries come with like this mayo sauce and I'm a white man and I love miso mayo. Ew, it's literally called creamy sauce. No, that's called extra creamy sauce. This is literally like mayo frits or fries. How are you saying it in fucking French? It's not the ketchup and mayonnaise mix. It's just mayo. It's just mayo with like pepper and it or some shit. You are a nasty motherfucker. And it's so, so fucking good. And then I got it a second time.
And it caused the most horrific pains in my gut I've ever had from food in my life. I really genuinely thought I was dying. Mind you, I woke up that day and I was like, I'm going to go get food at this really cute cafe. Like we should go blah, blah, blah. He's like, I don't want to go. I don't know. I don't know. I'm going to get it. And then he kept getting up and getting down like he was going to go like he literally was having the fight for his life with himself. And then he's like, honestly, I'm just going to stay back and get McDonald's. And I was like.
Okay, like you you can do that. It is that is your freedom so bad And then he told me that he sweat through his clothes it was and you know, it's disgusting is the acne show was that night and I slept in my thermals in bed and The pain caused me to sweat my ass off. It's so hot in that fucking room Yes, and to sweat a stain into the bed and
And then to jizz on Inya's pillow. And I wore the thermals that I sweat through to the acne show. You're... You what? I sweat through the thermals onto my bed and it was like a stain in my bed. What about my pillow? I literally have no idea what you're talking about right now. You're actually freaking the fuck out. Okay. So, do you sweat... I just... I feel like I heard you say you came into my... Like, you creamed on my pillow. I...
You are accusing me of insane things right now. Okay. And it's actually really scary. Well, the good thing is we have both video and audio recording of you being crazy. Okay. Well, and I'm going to kill myself, so. And you should kill yourself. Oh, my God. I made it a New Year's revolution. Just stop saying that. Revolution. I made it. Said consciously. It's just in my brain. Said consciously. Oh, my God. Said consciously. I just can't stick to my New Year's revolutions.
We have to talk about our hotel room. Okay. Oh, yeah. We, first of all, I think the hotel we're staying at, like, God bless it, but, like, I think it was, I think it's a money laundering scheme. Like, I don't think it's a real hotel. None of the rooms are real. You'll see it in the vlog. Yeah, like, and you're going to see, no, but the thing is, you're going to see it in the vlog and be like, oh, this is a cute hotel room. No.
Let me talk to you about the hotel itself. First of all, we get there and it like I didn't expect it to be that tiny for how much we paid for it. But it's like incredibly tiny. Whatever. We can live. The first morning we woke up, we wake up like every time we're jet lagged, we usually wake up at like 6 a.m. or something. We wake up at like 6 a.m. It's like we're sitting there for two hours. And then all the all the subbed in, all the subbed in.
There's a smell. Like, no, not a smell. An odor. Like a foul sewage. Like a thick fucking odor. Like, usually I only smell this when Drew is like talking to me directly in my face. But I wasn't even looking at him in the face and I smelt this smell. This is dead. In my face is my code for my butthole. It's the code for your balls. And Inya's talking into my butthole. And Inya.
We were like, what is that smell? And we start sniffing around the room and it's the bathroom. And we've realized that for some reason, every few hours, and we've both heard this, we'll hear like the pipes gurgling and sizzling.
and just a stench will erupt and we don't even know what's worse is we don't know where in the bathroom it comes from like i think it comes from the side of the toilet so like the toilet bowl where it meets the weird tile floor i think it's coming out of the side there if we put soap water all around the rim i'm sure we would see it bubble up out of there oh it's like oh god why is my brain so fucking big
Oh my god, it's actually crazy. No, you just use like the tire hole method. No, I'm a fucking genius. And sometimes I amaze myself at like my creativity to find leaks. It's like if you were so smart, it would be cool if you like put it to use and like built a house or something. Hello, I'm doing a podcast. And I guarantee everybody watching this is like, oh my god, Drew is literally so smart. So smart. So smart. Wait, why is Drew subliminally so smart? Subliminally said consciously, Drew is so smart.
It just reminds me, JT had espresso for the first time and she put out her story. She was like trying expresso and then like five hours later, she was like, why did nobody tell me this shit was going to knock me on my ass? Like I've been up for five extra hours. Expresso. Um,
Fuck, there's so many little things like where you mispronounce it like no library. Oh Valentine's Day. It's Valentine's Day. Yeah, I think I mispronounce a lot and especially names and it's really embarrassing because I'll call someone by the wrong name forever and at some point they'll just stop correcting me because they're like this bitch fucking she doesn't even know who I am and that's okay. Also at our hotel, um,
A friend stayed. I don't even know why I'm saying friend. Wait, I just thought of something. I realized if I catch your name immediately, you're going to be in my life for a long time. But if I can't remember your name and I see you a second time and I don't know your name or recognize your face...
That's God telling me that you're not going to be in my life. Because when I first met you, I literally did not have trouble with your name at all. Same with your face. We also had been sending each other illicit photos for like two years on the internet. You were sending me illicit photos for two years. Remember the hay incident? I'm sending you my boobs. My boobs. I was playing with them. I sent Drew...
a live like um silicone mold of my boobs and I played with them all night but let's just say I saw someone's boobs at an age I shouldn't have before they were pretty lit and um I don't feel any kind of way about it um
I was down to see some boobs in geometry and it was really funny to me. In geometry class? No, literally. I think it might have been biology, but I remember. That is a biology study, like anatomy, human anatomy. Yeah, she was just helping me. She was literally just helping you study. And I remember standing in the hallway looking at this DM and I was like, big boobs. What is that? That is literally the only lyric I know. That is not a lyric. What is that from? I don't know.
Someone knows. Friend of a friend. Friend of a friend. Was he a four or was he a ten? I know my mama wouldn't like it if she knew about all my... Was he a four or was he a ten? Is that what I think I'm singing? Friend of a friend. No, I think she does say that. What song is that? It's Bodies. Bodies on bodies and you... That is the craziest note. That's not what that sounds like. Bodies and bodies and bodies. I know my mama wouldn't like it if she knew about...
That's like the straight woman version of Biking by Frank Ocean. What does that mean? I'll let you dissect that. Thank you. No, like, wait. I give people brain teasers.
That's what I am. But you give yourself brain teasers. I don't think you know what you're saying. You can't tease my brain. Bitch, I'm getting on IG. Fuck y'all. I'm sure a lot of y'all have noticed we don't have many ads anymore. And you're probably thinking, wow, oh my God, I feel so bad for them. They deserve ads. But we're doing our job. You're not doing your job. You need to fucking subscribe and engage with me or I will never do my job again. I can't believe I miss reading ads. I miss the taste.
about our hotel is you couldn't use a blow dryer there like you just couldn't use one the power in the entire hotel would go out shut off like the whole room would go out our friend who was also our fucking um outlets electrocute the fuck out of us every time we plug something in it sparks up and like barks at us yes it literally makes a big fucking spark um but i was getting my hair and makeup done for the show you weren't
Like why are you like, why are you lying? I'm not lying. You're gonna make them think I'm lying and I'm not lying. She wasn't. You're the liar. That's the funny thing is in this like relationship. You're the liar. That girl's a liar. I can't say boy in song because I'm straight. So when like, when like a guy is like talking about or like when a girl is singing about a guy and I want to sing the lyrics, I'm like, oh, that girl. You probably just said consciously do that. Yeah, I said consciously calm the fuck down. You're always thinking of girls. What's a lyric about like a boy?
That girl is a gun. That's the vibe I've been on recently. The girl being a gun. The girl in question. I'm thinking of the Usher thing where it's like, you ain't got to call. It's okay, boy. Like he had the crowd do it. It's okay. But you would just say it the way it's sung. You wouldn't say like, it's okay, boy. And he was at my party talking about fucking sucking cock. Sucking dick and cock. Sucking dick and cock.
Sucking dick and cock. Dude, so many things on the internet are going to age insanely. Like so many things. You look literally every second of our podcast. Every second of our podcast. We're going to look back in two years. We're going to be like, what the fuck were we saying? I feel that way about any clip I see. I'm disgusted. Exactly. But in five years, we'd be like, damn, we were so lit. Like we were so sick. Maybe. Hopefully. Like all of my YouTube videos, I like went back and watched like a few of them. And I was like,
actually what the fuck was I doing? Why was I putting casts all over my body? Yeah, I think I said consciously. I'm always thinking about how you should have said that to me. I'm thinking about how I'll perceive my videos. Have you talked about your chemical burns? No. Do you not want to? I'll talk about it. I'm healed now. I'm a healed woman. And you have chemical burns. So I was doing this shoot and I was bleaching my eyebrows for it because we were like all sitting around and we were like, okay,
Yeah, it's good. We literally have like PTSD with this fucking quarter. I know, it's fucking terrifying. This quarter. Why is this quarter giving me PTSD? This quarter. Oh wait, Kai, blur the screen. I really, because we're in Paris, I smoke way more cigarettes than usual and I know everyone finds me fucking disgusting and repulsive for it, but I really want to smoke a cigarette right now. Alright, blur the screen. Um. Pop, smoke one. Should I pop a perk? Pop a pill. Should I pop a pill or two right now? Yes.
But so whatever. We're on this set and I'm like I am so down to bleach my eyebrows. I've been wanting to. Like I've been thinking about it because I can't do anything to my hair. I'm so down to do it. I...
I literally tell them which this is so stupid because after I told them this they were on the way to get the stuff and I could have easily been like actually I use tretinoin now like maybe this will hurt my skin but I kind of thought about it but I didn't think anything of it because I haven't bleached my eyebrows in a while and now I use really harsh chemicals on my face if you don't know what tretinoin is it's just like a really harsh chemical for acne I think we might have talked about this maybe
Like right when you got it done, the next episode, we probably talked about it. I think that the last episode was that episode. Am I tripping? No, because we've had to go live where you didn't have eyebrows. I don't know what's happening. Oh, we have. I think I did. I think I did talk about this. I don't know. Sorry. I don't know where I am. Drew. I really don't know how we got here. Not me either. Not me either. I had to Google Michael Imparoli from The Sopranos.
Oh, because of the heaven shoot? Yeah. Dude, I love him. Like, why would I have sex with him now? Does he have a wife? See, this motherfucker has got to stop DMing me because he's married. Classic. Classic, classic. Well, I still think that Parisian people hate me.
So you should hit that. I've been thinking about what it means to marry somebody with generational wealth and it's been on my mind. It's really been on my mind because I'm like, I don't want to be the one to have to build out the wealth. I just want the wealth to be there. Oh my fucking God, I need $176 million tomorrow. I really fucking do. Like it's...
I know. And I don't know. Like, we're just not in the area where we're going to get that. This is as good as my life is getting. And I'm OK with that. Like, I'm really happy with my life. But I want to give my kids generational wealth. And I want to honestly, I know we hate the rich and I know we hate hoarding wealth. But I want to be a part of that. I want that. I want that. And I'm going to be honest. Sorry. I want to hoard the wealth.
for my children and me and like I want nepotism babies. I don't care. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. Like sue me. But I'm tired. I'm tired of like I don't want to hold the flag of like guys I made it out. Like I made it out of my situation. I want to be like guys I literally was born into the situation and it's lit. Like that's what I wish I was.
I am so envious of people who are just like born with a lot of money. I wish that was me. And like, that's actually funny because I feel like that was a big conversation recently.
about like um like being envious of like nepotism babies and it's like yeah well fuck you because i like yes i want that duh like what me when i'm pointing out my kids to be good or not even my kids could you imagine me with a fucking child of course i want rich parents the fuck like why is that even that's a different story but what did you say could you i don't even know what i said oh i said imagine me with a child no i don't want to
That would be really bad. I was thinking about that. I was like, any of my guy friends... I'm going to get a female pregnant. I don't know what else you would get pregnant. What else would you get pregnant? Saying... Female? I'm done. I know what you were going to say. I'm over. Um...
But yeah, I wish I was born into like so much money, but I don't want to have to build the generational wealth. And this is as good as it's going to get. And that's OK. I'm just going to live well for my kids and my kids are going to have to do the thing. And I'm just hoping that my kids can make something of themselves. So people on me can sit down and not do anything for the rest of my life. Yeah. I want kids so that they can work for me.
That's kind of my bad. Kids learn for the salt mines or coal mines. Yeah, I'm thinking of like popping out a few, throwing them in the mines with a bird. Canary. Call me a canary. Call me the canary. Um, yeah. Well, fashion week is insane. Oh yeah, this is Drew's first fashion week. What are your thoughts? This shit is fucking crazy. Yeah. I don't know how the girls do it. Um,
Dare I say braver than the Marines or braver than an iPhone or braver than an Android user. Instead of saying braver than the Marines, we're going to start saying braver than an Android user. And I don't give a fuck if I get in trouble for that. I don't care. I really don't care. That's the best sound ever. Their sound design is down pat. When I hear that in public, I laugh uncontrollably. Like no matter what, I'll be like...
Like, it's crazy. It's just me when I'm laughing uncontrollably in here. The TikTok sound. No, guys, I literally. I'm dead. No, I'm dead as fuck.
What was I saying? You were saying that when you hear it in public, you get dead as fuck. But before that. You were saying that I don't care if I get in trouble for saying that Android users are braver than the Marines. But what was I saying that to? Oh, you said the fashion week, girl. Yes, yes. Let me tap back in. Let me tap back in. Let me tap back in. Let me top back in. I'm a top to women. Yeah, we don't.
You don't use those terms for straight relationships. Yes. Do you know what that means? No. Okay. But I think Fashion Week is fucking crazy. And I won't go any further because I do want to participate more. Yeah, I think it's just... But I'll speak my peace of mind soon. I mean, most people know that it's definitely like a game of...
A multi-level marketing scheme? It's definitely a game of playing your cards right and being able to interact on a social level, which is why I think I'm pretty bad at it because I'm not really good at getting in a room and shutting the fuck up and being a pretty girl. I'm really good at getting in a room and talking about balls in my butt and farting. But I think people love it. I think people love it. I think some people love it, but some people are definitely a bit like...
She's a lot. She's cool, but she's a lot. I haven't met someone in a position of authority that we've been goofy around that hasn't loved it.
Like, I feel like everybody in this industry has been like, oh, my God, this is like a breath of fresh air. But you know what's fucked up is I think a lot of people in this industry will love it for their personal sake. My ego is fucking insane. What? I just start, I say shit and I don't even realize how egotistical it sounds. I don't understand, like, how egotistical it sounds. Yeah.
I don't think it's egotistical because we haven't had anybody like outwardly respond negatively to us. At least we haven't heard it. But I know for a fact people have met us and been like, they are too fucking much. Like there's just no way because we're just so abrasive. I think we're definitely a polarizing set of people. Maybe me more so than you because you're definitely like...
on the more timid side when you first meet someone. I just don't talk. No, I talk, but when I'm crazy, I'm crazy. And then I can read energies really well. Like, I can read vibes. I can read the room, and I'm like, okay, they're obviously not fucking with what I'm putting down, so I'm just going to...
mellow down and chameleon to their level. That's one thing about me is I can shape shift my personality. So you're fake as fuck? No, I am like the fakest bitch in the room. It is scary. I'm the fakest in the room. It is really scary. I can like play a character so well. Me when I'm in my self tape. Girl. Me.
I'm an actor. Actor arc. I'm like, I'm a chameleon. Anything you tell me, I can play a character so well. Then they're like, oh, say your height and age. I'm like, my name is Enyi Manzar. I can play a character very well. I'm 5'3". 5'4 on a good day. I think I'm 5'4". I'm not 5'3 anymore. At least in my head. I don't think I'm 5'3". I'm 6'2". You're not 6'2", babe. Babe, I literally am. Babe, you are not 6'2". I'm not 6'2". Yeah. Yeah.
Thank you. I can tell. I'm 6'1". Sometimes you just have to add an inch. Me about my wiener. But I think definitely people find us appealing for their personal lives, but maybe not a work scenario. I just think I'm an ego testicle, like an egomaniac. You do have huge ego testicles. I am going to start saying ego testicle like so casually in conversation. I'm going to be like, oh, it's an evil ego testicle.
It's an egotistical, like, maniacal freak. You need to stop with that damn name, bitch. That's going to be so annoying to keep track of. I don't care. But, yeah, also, is this a cow? What is this drawing that's in front of us? I think it's a cow with a cross. Yeah, it's really freaking me out. It's kind of offensive.
I need chapstick so bad because my lips have been chapped like all fucking day. And for the first time ever, I don't have it in my purse because I've been switching. Oh, cool. I have a note that's literally 26. 21. 21. How do you feel when this episode comes out? You'll be 25. 17. You'll be 17. I mean, sorry. I was. I'll be good. We'll be good. Whoa. Don't want to talk about it. You don't want to talk about it.
It is funny being the age of all the finers that I used to make fun of for being on the internet. I'd be like, bro, you're so old. Why are you on the internet? Get the fuck off the internet. Now I'm that age, which is funny. Now I'm at the point when I meet a 20-year-old, I feel like the annoying old person who's like, you're 20. And it freaks me out. I'm not doing it on purpose, but then I get subconscious and self-conscious and
What's a good one for self-conscious? Self-conscious. Shelf-conscious. Self-conscious. Shelf-conscious and self-conscious. Self-conscious. Yeah. Shelf. No, it's shelf-conscious. I guess self-conscious is self-conscious. No, shelf-conscious is too much. I can't. Yeah, I get really like self-conscious and self-conscious. I look so grumbly.
And I just really think about my age and it freaks me out. And it's really interesting how much I thought I would have done by this time. And I'm this age and I still have so much to do, which is like both nice and terrifying because it's nice because when I put it into perspective, yeah, I'm like, good. I have so many years left to live. I have so much to do. I have so much time to do that if I'm lucky enough not to die on my plane flight, on my flight tomorrow, on my plane flight. Yeah.
on my plane tomorrow. That's going to be awesome if I survive it because every time I get on a plane, I think it's going to crash. I know. It's really bad. I text everyone. I know. I love you so much. I love you so much. Like me texting my dad. I love you so much. It's taking off. Sometimes if I'm only texting one person and I forget to text everybody, I'll be like, I feel so loved in my life and I love everyone. You know what's crazy? You know what's crazy? What's crazy? Is that I will literally sit down
On my flight for like the first 15 minutes, like convinced that it's going to go down. Oh, same. And in my head to go down in the takeoff and landing in my head, I'm writing like monologues of what like I when the plane's going down, what I'm going to FaceTime.
two people when the plane's going down and be like i love you so much and who i'm gonna call and what i'm gonna say and then i go as far as writing notes in my notes app so they upload to like iCloud exactly so they can see them after the plane crashes i said consciously um but let's talk about at the fashion show one of my favorite musicians of all time wanting to have sex with me
Yeah, let's talk about it. That's as far as it goes. But you can vouch. I can vouch that a staring was happening. And I was not having it. I was like, no. Don't do this to me. I'm just so desired, y'all. It really is crazy how desired I am. I mean, I was sitting next to you, so it could have been either one of us. No, it was 100% me. It was 100% you? Yeah. 100%. No doubt. Well, I think it was me. Yeah.
Oh my God. Why would it ever be you when I'm sitting next to you? Pick me. Choose me. But yeah. Well said consciously, I thought it was me. So, you know.
Yeah. We're never going to be able to do a drunk episode with the both of us because Drew is straight edge now. It's crazy. Drew is a reformed straight edge. They just invited me out after this. And he's freaking out. No. And I literally am like, how can I get out of this? I do not want to go. You don't have to go. Because even me going is pushing it because our flight is tomorrow morning. But Whitney was like so hurt when I said no. And I was like, damn. Yeah, because they all want to go out dancing. It'd be nice. It'd be nice. Said consciously you might have FOMO. That sounds like my worst nightmare.
I don't think I will this time. You don't think said consciously you'll wish you. Shut the fuck up. Oh my God. That's not even our joke. That's literally Josiah's joke that we stole from him. It's so good. I wish I remembered the other one. It's said conscious in something else. What is the other one? Also, we might have been yelling this whole episode because we put the mic so loud. I'm eating this. I'm eating this fucking mic too. I'm going to eat you out. I'm eat you up.
Wait, what? Me when I'm late to the joke though. What else can we talk about? Okay, no one's talking about how me, you and Barbie are in a three-way relationship and that the internet just hasn't broke it yet. What?
That me, you, and Barbie are in a three-way relationship and the internet hasn't broke. I don't give a fuck. But she asked you not to say that. I'm tired of being hidden. I'm tired of being hidden. Well, that's just the price that comes with dating such a gorgeous woman. Gorgeous woman. Gorgeous. Sorry. She's just so gorgeous. Gorgeous. I'm really trying to make every word pronounced wrong. Go back to a time when I wasn't allowed to drive. I don't want to...
I don't want to be able to work. I'm honestly like we got to get over this hump of like girls like working. Like I don't want to work anymore. I don't want to do anything, even though my job isn't very taxing. So I'm complaining kind of from a throne and it's a little bit dismissive of people who actually have to work when my work is on my iPhone. But I just don't want to do it anymore. And I'm really sorry. And I'm sorry to my family. I know I told you I'd get you out the dirt and like maybe get you a house one day.
But that's a lot of work and I just don't want to do it. It's a lot of responsibility. I just think I'd rather like chill. That's my vibe recently. Like I just want to chill. That's honestly so true. I just want to exist and chill. I need $170 million. Yeah, but I think we could definitely like we could social network our way there maybe.
i don't think we could i would have sex with elon musk that's really nasty i really would i would have sex with a lot of people but not elon musk if it meant that i could have the world i would do it i mean grimes did it but i don't think she needed to she was just like she's just that kind of girl i wouldn't have sex with him i would not have sex with him for any amount of money there's like a lot of people as much as i want everything in the world there's a lot of people i wouldn't have sex with to get to it but there's a lot of people i would have sex with for free
And immediately. Without question. What's his name from Ex Machina? Oh, Oscar Isaac. We mention Oscar Isaac every episode, I think. He's the it boy. He is my it man. I love him so much. Oscar Isaac. Honestly, this is a gross one. Willem Dafoe. We saw his giant wiener. It's massive. I'm literally not joking. Willem Dafoe could get it. Yeah, he can get it. Willem Daflum float. Yeah.
I'm trying to suck on that Willem Daflein float. I'm trying to think of any other like what are like really gnarly like celebrities who you're like, oh, you can get it. Like just like nasty. This dude, I always forget his name, but he's from the Oz. I'm looking at the prison show. I don't know what that is. That doesn't exist. Oh, good news is I looked at the Ox. Oh, Z. Now, why the fuck is Christian texting me from his goddamn flip phone again?
I'm going to say put that shit away. He tried so hard to make it fucking happen. Is it that guy? Or like the main guy? Look up cast. If it's the guy who I'm thinking of, it's your Don. Because you can't even say that one publicly because that one's really fucking nasty, Drew. Okay.
Oh, that's not the worst. He just looks like literally a Sims character or something. He actually looks like he's made of clay. He looks like this person looks like he's molded from clay and not lit wet. The thing is, is if you get it, you get it. I got really scared you were going to say this, Mother Walker. If you know why, you know why. And that's that. Like, I swear to God, I'll tell you after this, but if you get it, you get it.
I'm trying to think of a really gnarly one on my behalf. Like, one that I've said and people have been like, ooh. I can't think. I think Willem Dafoe is, like, probably the most, like, ooh. But he was really hot when he was younger, too. So that's, like, not the craziest one. Mine is, like, my woman crush is, like, Beyonce or, like, Britney Spears or Lana Del Rey. Those are just, like, really prominent people.
or miley cyrus or ariana grande yeah but those are just like really they're all so hot with big boobs but those are i mean do you like their music and stuff no i don't listen to girl musicians okay oh well damn why'd you say like i don't listen to pop stars okay but you just want to like i listen to deftones
You are a Deftones girl. You can't have hate without love. You have to be the most polarizing thing ever. And that's why we're so loved. You can't have hate if you can't have love. No, that's not... There's no way you're the first one to say that. And if you are, it's not the best thing. Like...
Do you think that was good, what you just said? Yeah, because if we didn't have hate, we wouldn't know how good love felt. I know, and you keep saying it. Heaven is a prison. Heaven is a prison, and I'm not joking. Heaven is a place on earth with you. That's tea, though. No, I don't mean like the clothing brand. I mean like actual heaven is a prison. It's a prison experiment. Like it's purgatory? Yes, because it's going to- It's like in The Sopranos. Oh my God, it scares the fuck out of me thinking about like eternity in heaven with like-
Never feeling anything bad. I don't want to be in heaven if I can't get on a plane and go to the Bahamas. I can't do that. Because in my head, when I think of heaven, what do you think heaven is? When I think of heaven, I just think it's living again. I think it's me and Lana Del Rey. You're straight? Okay. I think it's me under the Eiffel Tower. Just with the one you love. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
No, heaven is a place on earth with you. We're some of the worst people in the world because why do we hate tourist places so much? Why is it like a killer? Because we're different. Yeah, we have to be different so bad. We're not like the other guys.
no it's really really it's literally a disease it's a disease to be this much of an opposition to everything everybody on the planet likes that i'm like the second you want to eat near the eiffel tower you know how different i want to be is the second i go mainstream if i ever do go mainstream if you bitches let it fucking happen jesus fucking christ but no one the brain
don't like us that much. The second I get famous, the second I get mainstream, I am switching up and hating myself. That's how different I want to be. Like you're anti-you. I'm not posting photos of myself anymore. I'm about to be my anti-era. Anti by Rihanna or anti like everything? Because we're already anti everything. Yeah. I listened to that album again for the first time in a long time. Except for love. I love love. Why are you saying it like that? The earthquake is coming in L.A.
Yeah, the big one? Mm-hmm. I hope I'm not there. I fear it's coming in the next 10 days and I'm going to be there, unfortunately. I won't be there, so I'll be chill. But I'll miss all my things. All my things will be lost. What about me and Azul? I could find new ones.
You are replaceable. What did we have a hypothetical about? Oh, I kind of talked about this on your blog, but like, I don't give a fuck. I was telling Inya that today I was going to split away from her and all of our friends to go explore the catacombs alone because you can book a tour for like 48 euros, which is cheap as fuck to go see like skeletons and shit. And I don't know if that's a moral to say, but.
Might be.
And I'm sorry if it is, genuinely, but I can't see a reason why it's bad right now. But I said I was going to go explore the catacombs on my own. And then I asked Danielle, I was like, oh my God, imagine I got lost in the catacombs. What would you do? You couldn't fly home, huh? And she was like, no, bitch, I'm flying home. And I was like, if you got lost in the catacombs, I would fucking stay, no matter what. I would be here for you. And I don't give a fuck. And she was dead set. She was dead ass. You know what, matter of fact...
I would return my flight. I would get a La Premier Air France flight, spend all the money I have on that fucking one-way ticket, and I'd have so much champagne on the flight that I'd get drunk, and I forgot you even fucking existed. And I'd get home. You don't know how much this hurts me. And I'd get home, and I'd go to my dad's 50th birthday party, get drunk again, wake up on... Oh, that's on Drew's birthday. Get drunk as fuck on his birthday. Commemorate his life in a way, but also celebrate my dad's 50th year of life. And then...
Go the fuck to sleep. I would miss my own birthday to go into those fucking caves. She's trying to put a cigarette on me. Y'all see this? To go into those fucking caves and get you out on my own. The thing is, okay, here was my take. Here's what I would do. If Drew went to the catacombs. My mama Bertram. That's literally my take is my mama Bertram. Mama Bertram, Pilot Jones, Harley Davidson and Pilot Jones are dating and they gave birth to Laurel and Yanny.
the golden white dress on i was about to say green needle what the fuck is that the green needle dress what is that green needle green needle storm what is that i'm gonna make you smell like cigarettes you bitch this is our worst episode ever this is easily our worst episode ever okay here's what i would do in this hypothetical i would okay you didn't give my side of the story listen
What do you hear? Green needle. I hear brainstorm. I swear to God I do. Now look at brainstorm. Brainstorm. It doesn't say that. Green needle. It doesn't say brainstorm and you want to be different so fucking bad. This is your need to be different jumping out. On my entire existence, I hear brainstorm. On my entire life right now. I just don't understand how that's a thing. Just like the green and blue dress. Just like Laurel and Yanny. You mean white and gold? Yeah.
It is not white and gold because you said blue and black. It's white and gold versus blue and black. Yeah, and it's blue and black. Wait, or is it black and gold versus blue and black? I don't know. I know how it works because it's literally white and blue. No, that dress is black and blue. Yeah, it's black and blue, and I don't give a fuck about what you say. Okay, so. But the Adidas sneakers, the new ones that came out. What are you talking about?
You've seen it? The Nike shoe. Stop! The Ugg. So... What the Ugg? Drew didn't give my side of the story. Basically...
Here's what would happen. There is no side of your story. You are an evil person. No, you didn't explain. Okay, so it's my dad's 50th birthday the day before Drew's. By the time this comes out, it's already passed. I've had the shindig of my life. It's been the best night of my life. I celebrate my dad's 50th year. And he is skipping my birthday. Okay, it's not my fault that both of them happen to fall on milestones. I invited Drew. I told him I would get him a ticket and he ignored it. It is just as much the half of my life because I don't plan on living past 50.
As it is the half of your father's life. So basically I was with you for the half of your life if you're not living till 50. So this birthday isn't that big of a deal. No, 25 is one half. No, but you said that you don't plan on living past 50. I plan on living at 250. Oh, well, I'll be there for the day you die.
See how I'm fucking treated. This is just disgusting. Okay, so listen. My dad's birthday party is on Drew's birthday. So technically, and we're leaving tomorrow. So let me paint the picture for you. Today, it is March 2nd. Tomorrow's March 3rd, which is Friday. And Saturday is March 4th, which is my dad's birthday party and Drew's birthday. Drew today on March 2nd was talking about going to the catacombs and getting lost. And I'm like, okay, well, first of all, you're going to get found. You're not going to die in the catacombs. Like, I don't think it's that big. Okay.
Blur the screen, Kai. It's not that big of a deal. So you're not going to get lost and it's not going to be that big of a deal. So what I'm going to do is I'm going to get on the flight back to enjoy my dad's birthday because I just can't miss it. Also, I funded this party. It's the big extravaganza of his life. Like I have to go like it's literally like if I if I was investing in a festival, it would be crazy not to go. And that's what my dad's birthday is. It's basically the new Coachella. So I have to go to my dad's Coachella birthday event. And then what happens is right after
the party I'm gonna be drunk as fuck but I'm gonna get right back on a flight back to Paris because by the time I land back in Paris they're gonna have found Drew but it was enough time yeah I did it's actually very impressive because I can't do that um it's been enough time that might only be a guy thing blowing O's is only a guy thing yeah who told you that me I guess it does that is how that works if you think it and you're a guy that's hmm like I mean like you yeah
What the hell? So by the time I get back, it's already been big news in Paris. Drew is famous. He's famous. It's like, but famous kind of in a bad way because they're like, stupid American gets lost in the catacombs. Like that's the, I can't do a French accent. It's not a good vibe. It's not a good vibe, but you're famous and they're all looking for you. And by the time I get back, it's them taking you out of the catacombs. I just so happen to land and get right to the Zara by the catacombs in time. Oh, bitch. And I'm pushing through the crowd. That's what. And I get to Drew and I'm looking for you. I was looking for you.
y'all i was looking at how far the cat yeah you would have saved me but i would have been like dead probably well you don't even i don't even know if your iphone works down there so i'm gonna do like be outside of the catacombs at zara you're gonna go in and explore that's what i discovered today is that the catacombs they built a zara and a mcdonald's a block away and some dark evil energy is in zara and that's how i know which
Which is crazy because it's like what I just I guess I don't really understand the catacombs. Like, I don't know what it is. And I hope it doesn't have some historical, really devastating. Not really shit. Like past. I think it's Catholicism. Per. So it's my jewelry. What are the catacombs? Come on now.
It's really funny because every time I'm in Paris, I'm with a bunch of friends who I know from the U.S. And then we're all hanging out at a restaurant or something and we're talking. And then I have a moment where I like zoom out and I look around and I'm like, oh, my God, no one else here speaks English. I'm freaking out. Like I'm like, where am I? Why am I here? This is like a different country. And it scares me. Do you poop on flights? Hell no. You don't poop on flights? Even that long ass flight? You didn't have to poop once? Not once. But you just don't poop. So I'm not talking to a real person right now.
Literally, if I had to, I literally wouldn't. If you had to poop on a plane, you wouldn't poop on a plane? No. That is weird. I will poop anywhere. Those toilets are nasty as fuck. You could be banging down the door till the fucking dogs come home. I don't give a fuck, bitch. Fuck you. And guess what? I'm going to play TikToks loud too. I love getting in a public bathroom and playing TikToks and watching TikToks while I shit. I don't give a fuck. This is cunt. Oh, that is. That is really good. My next IG pic. Would it be improper to take an IG pic there? I mean, I posted all my stories, so why can't I main feed post it?
- You posted the catacombs on your story? - Should I go take a picture in Jesus' tomb? - Yeah. - Do you think I get flocked with a bunch of religious people who are like, "This is so insensitive." - Probably. - That's a good picture. You look so gorgeous there. From here, it looks like you are at the catacombs. What's been your favorite moment being here so far? - The McDonald's chicken nuggets. - Oh my God, this man. - I wish I was joking. - You're not joking. - I'm simple. - Something's wrong with you. - It's really easy to please me.
I'm so fake because I'm constantly like, I hate it in Paris. And every time I get here, I'm like, this is amazing. And then I leave and I'm like, that was fucking awful. Like, I love doing that. It's the same thing I do with food where I'm like, that tastes disgusting. I need another bite.
like i need to have more of that also i think the the workers at the bar think i'm a drunk at the hotel yeah every night you've ordered like a sad drink because i go and order drinks alone and they ask you and they're like you want to drink and he's like no and then i'm just there alone and then wait last night oh yeah we came back from the acne show and we were like so tired i was like i just need food i really wanted to try the restaurant at our hotel which is actually gorgeous that restaurant is amazing amazeballs
Awesome sauce. You're pretty awesome sauce. Rafflecopter. You make really awesome sauce. I make Rafflecopter vibes. You make me Rafflecopter. Why am I literally a Rafflecopter vibe? I'm random. I'm so random like that. Oh my God, decinate. Why do you have a scar above your eye? Did you hit your eye as a kid? Should I tell the story? I feel like I know so many guys with a scar around their eye, and it's usually like a skateboard hit my face. No, it was at church camp, and-
We were playing ultimate frisbee and one of my friends threw a frisbee for me to catch and I missed it and it went under a truck that had its tailgate down and I went underneath and I forgot the tailgate was down and when I was coming back out, I came out right where the tailgate was and I lifted up really fast and gashed my eyelid open and it was so sick. I wish there were photos of it and there was like blood all
all down my face. You would have been viral on Tumblr. Yeah, it would have been so fucking lit. But it was a scary amount of blood, but it didn't really hurt me that bad because like it just didn't hurt for some reason. And I like look at my body and I'm like, oh my God, that's like a lot of blood. Like it was a serious amount of blood. Like half of my face like covered both my hands, like dripping off my chin onto my chest and body. And like so much that I was like leaving a trail of blood. And there was like a little pool of blood in my lap in the car.
And at the time, like I was at this church camp, my babysitter, who was also like the youth director at the church, was the one like that was putting on the camp. And she rushed me to the hospital because she was like everyone was fucking terrified. But they did a really good job at not acting scared. But I found out like five years later that like people literally thought I was dying. They were like they were like, I've never seen that much blood in my life.
All from that gash. I don't think I ever had any serious injuries as a kid. And then I broke my clavicle. Because I was responsible and I took care of myself and I wasn't a fucking idiot fool. And you doesn't know what a clavicle is? I don't. Like, I'm not kidding. Like, when you said that, I... I don't know what that is. It's your collarbone. Then fucking call it what it is. It's your collarbone. It is a clavicle first.
It's a medical term. No one, like, why would you even say that? Because you broke your clavicle. That's like saying, like, um. It's just professional. The professional name of, like, your chest. Your decolletage. Your sternum? No, or I guess that's the medical term. But it'd be like, oh, your decolletage. What the fuck? I've never heard decolletage. You've never heard decolletage? No, never once. Let me make sure that's a word. Because now I'm embarrassed. Girl, you're making shit up right now. Decolletage. That is. It probably is. I've just never heard it.
Declatage, a low neckline on a woman's dresser top, a woman's cleavage as revealed by a low cleavage. So I guess it doesn't mean chest. It means like tits. Massive knockers. It's like sexy word for tits. What is there to talk about in Paris? Like what is the talk of the city?
The talk of the city is that I love walking around alone here. I think this is the only city where I feel really good eating alone. Like it feels nice and like comforting to eat alone. New York, I feel good eating alone. LA, eating alone is too much of a statement. And I would say the same about like even Miami. Like I don't want to eat alone in Miami. It feels really sad. Yeah.
And like disappointing. But like here in New York, I feel like eating alone is a vibe. L.A., it's not a vibe. L.A., I feel like people are like, damn, this girl's so sad. She probably just went through a breakup. And I'm like, no, dude, I'm just hungry and I want to eat alone. But like I won't do that alone. I think I've eaten alone in L.A., like out at a restaurant alone, maybe three times, maybe four, maybe five.
Probably twice. But usually I don't like doing it. I'll take the food to my car and eat alone in my car. I've done that a lot. I've eaten alone more in Japan than I have in LA. Yeah.
Japan, it feels good, too. Oh, my God. We were in Japan last month. Now we're in fucking prison. We were not. I love this place. In prison France. We're in prison France. That's why the fucking Eiffel Tower is made out of cage. Okay. Paris is hella illuminated out. It's a weird core here, y'all. Like, it's dangerous as fuck. Are you going to deep dive or, like, give your conspiracy? Well, just the amount of gold everywhere is weird as fuck. And there's...
fucking caves of skeletons underneath the city underneath the Zara yeah it's very very eerie
Should we wake up at 5 a.m. and go to the catacombs before we leave? Yeah, I literally would. I would not do that. I'm sorry. Don't tease me. But you love when I tease you. I do. In that way. I do. In the way that I do. Oh, my God. I just thought about our flight back. Oh, my God. Flying from L.A. to Paris is the worst flight of all time. The worst flight. The worst flight. I will never do this again. I wouldn't wish sitting up straight upon any of my mortal enemies.
Oh my god my tailbone hurts so bad I wouldn't wish sitting straight up for 10 hours on any of my M&E's My M&E's But subconsciously I think I want my M&E's to go through I want my enema's to go through that I've never done an enema I have
Is that when you put water in your butt? Yeah, I've never done that. Oh, it's like the solution that draws water from your colon into your gut to deconstipate you. People do that in their regime too, right? Yes. It's really bad for you though. Throw off your pH. Don't put stuff in your regime. Period. Period. Don't put stuff in your regime unless you're on your period. Period. Well, that was our episode.
weirdest episode ever i don't think we said anything i don't remember anything that happened that was the episode let's tap into some media i haven't watched anything um i've been watching a lot of basketball you know what song i listened to on the way over here on repeat young and beautiful wow and then i put on summertime sadness that's really good just a crazy fucking vibe
Young and Beautiful will always remind me of this one day in Miami when I lived there in our first home and it was raining a lot and my grandma was visiting from Honduras and
And it was thunderstorming outside. And I just finished watching it. And I was listening to Young and Beautiful a bunch and looking outside. I was like, it's so gorgeous. And then the lights went out. And then my grandma forced us all to put our electronics into a container and put them in the corner of the house because she thought the house was going to get struck by lightning because she didn't understand technology because she basically lives in a fucking...
concrete hut and I'm like girl that is not that's not how it works over here love her you don't need to do that but it was really cute because she was really scared and then I went and grabbed my phone and she was like please please put it down we don't want to die and I was like fine I was like I swear we're not going to die though but she forced me to put my iPhone away alright say your is that your media young and beautiful yeah
that's it that's all they get um mine is setting sun you'll never get to heaven i won't cry anymore alternative version by marvin gaye death tones yeah just death tones in general but none of their heavy shit only the tiktok songs oh my god you're weird like do you even know what year that band came out like when they debuted
White horse. Oh, per. You actually do know a lot. How do you know about that? Do you know about Radiohead too? Yeah. I had sex with Tom York. Oh my God. You know the song Creep? Yeah. It's about me. I don't know if that's a good thing. Oh, it is. Oh, it's creep in a sexy way? No, like in a stalker, like creepy way. Oh, like you're scary. Yeah.
Well, my other song is Spring is Coming with a Strawberry in Its Mouth by Roger Doyle. I've already said that, but I've been really, really listening to that while I've been here. It's just been my vibe. And then Alex G, Pretend. I'm going to go into Withdraw, I think. Of what? Me? Oxygen. My touch? Oxygen. Of my touch. Holding On by Tirza. We saw Tirza for the first time ever.
period the other day on our TV. And it greened me out. It was really shocking. Yeah, I don't know why I've never seen her. But I've seen her on the cover. Yeah, I just never thought that's what she looked like. Yeah. All right, well. Thank you guys so much for listening.
When we see you again, we love you. We may not be alive. We love you so much. When you see us again, it may be an AI rendered episode of us because we may not make it. They probably thought I was drunk, but I am kind of deliriously tired right now. Like it's kind of crazy what tired does to me.
I've been sleeping for like 14 hours a day though. I know. Drew's been sleeping a lot here. Like I've been waking up before you. Like yesterday I woke up at like 9.30, 9.45 and just sat there in bed until like 11 and I like woke him up at like 11.30 because I was like, dude, he's not waking up because I was just going to wait for you to wake up and be like, let's go eat. But then like almost three hours passed. I was like, dude, I think he died in his sleep. Yeah, no, I don't know what it is. And wait, you've been sleeping? Oh no, you sleep late here. Yeah. Um,
But I think my schedule is just still really off. Like I don't think I ever got used to like Paris time zone because I'm like waking up like I wake up at like six and I'm like awake for like an hour or two and go back to sleep till like 1130 because I'm just like, why am I up?
Yeah, I mean, like, I've just been here so many times the past year that I just, like, I'm used to it, you know? Yeah, I feel that. This is my third time here in the past year, which is kind of crazy. It's, like, the most I've visited anywhere that isn't Miami or New York. It's insane. And I probably won't ever come back because I will be passing on my flight tomorrow, so... Yeah, we hope you're happy. Oh, and the camera's dying, which is perfect. Peace and love and unity and respect. Bye. Bye.