Exposing Our DMs
01:21:38 Share

This episode is brought to you by Shopify. Forget the frustration of picking commerce platforms when you switch your business to Shopify, the global commerce platform that supercharges your selling wherever you sell. With Shopify, you'll harness the same intuitive features, trusted apps, and powerful analytics used by the world's leading brands. Sign up today for your $1 per month trial period at shopify.com slash tech, all lowercase. That's shopify.com slash tech.

This episode is brought to you by Experian. Are you paying for subscriptions you don't use but can't find the time or energy to cancel them? Experian could cancel unwanted subscriptions for you, saving you an average of $270 per year and plenty of time. Download the Experian app. Results will vary. Not all subscriptions are eligible. Savings are not guaranteed. Paid membership with connected payment account required.

Welcome back to this episode of Emergency Intercom. It makes sense. Everybody gets mad because I mention it every single episode, but I was watching Brittany and Sarah's podcast, and they also say, welcome back. Like, it's not that crazy because it's like, you were here last week. I'm welcoming you back. But no, you would welcome them back to...

Intercom. Like, welcome back to Emergency Intercom. Oh, but the problem is we say this episode. Oh, I think Brittany and them say welcome back to... I can't think of the name of their podcast. I've seen two episodes, though. And you loves it. They're so fucking fine. They were cracking me up. No free promo. No free promo. Cut! Cut! Cut! Cut! Cut!

Yeah, it makes... Okay, fine. Welcome back to Emergency Intercom. Yup. Hey! Any updates from your life, Drew? Other than me being the most stressed, anxious, irritable person I think I've ever been, not really much of an update. Our periods literally synced. I know. We actually had... We did actually sync. We actually had an irritable last three days together. And I can't describe...

I mean, what it was actually was I had neglected a bunch of work stuff. And I just like let it fester in my brain that it was like the end of the world if I just didn't get it done. When like in reality, like it's not the end of the world. And I've like calmed down a lot, but I'm still have this like lingering stress and anxiety that I'm like something like I'm missing something like I'm missing like.

I don't know how to describe it, but other than that, fucking awesome. Oh, how was... Also, to give context, me and Drew have been separated for the past week. It's been the longest we've been away from each other ever. Yeah.

But we've been separated. Drew and the crew went on a beautiful road trip, and I went to New York to partake in capitalism and consumerism. Enya loves shopping. She's addicted to shopping. I know. It's actually a problem. I'll explain the road trip. Yeah. So, like, me and Orion...

We wanted to go on a road trip and like a week before we had just been like throwing ideas out there. We were like, we need to go, let's go next week. Like blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. It wasn't really coming to fruition. And I don't think either of us believed it was going to actually happen. And then the night before we left, I was just like, let's go to the Grand Canyon. I've never seen it. And I want to like see it. I feel like it's going to make me cry. Like that's one of those things that's just like so breathtakingly beautiful. And I feel like you have to see it at least once in your life.

And the night before, we booked an Airbnb and got yeses from Christian and Josh. And me, Orion, Christian, and Josh just hopped in the car the next morning at 9 a.m. and drove all the way to...

And we didn't end up going to the Grand Canyon. We went to like a part of it. Yeah, we went to... I mean, it is technically the Grand Canyon, but we went to Page, Arizona. And we went to Antelope Canyon, which is fucking beautiful. It was... It...

Doesn't make sense. I don't understand how that's like a real fucking place on earth. Like we'll insert photos, but it was like genuinely shocking. It like made me tear up. I was like, what the fuck? Like places like this just exist. And like, no one really know about it, knows about it. Like, okay. Like whatever. I mean, granted, like iPhone takes all their backgrounds there. Apple takes all their background photos there and shit. And then in the same day we cruised over to horseshoe bend and

And that's where the iconic photo came from of me surrounded by fucking flies. I couldn't believe the flies in that. I was like, you fully do look like a dead body. I was stinky. I was a stinky boy. We had been hiking all day. But yeah, we just did that in the same day. And then the next day we drove home and it was nice. How was the driving? Christian drove the entire time and it was the most...

It felt like an hour-long drive. Like, it was not... I had zero complaints. Like, it was actually crazy. Dude, that's fucking awesome. Christian's a freak like that. Anytime we do any kind of, like, road tripping, he always is like, I'll drive, I'll drive. But I guess I do that, too. So we end up, like, kind of butting heads. When we went to Big Sur, we would be like, I'll drive, I'll drive. But I ended up doing a lot of driving because I, like...

literally have no fear because also for context Big Sur is like on the west coast like to get there you have to kind of go up the PCH um and that road can be scary because it's literally like on a cliff but I literally have zero fears because again like if we go we go not even that like if we died it would be because I made it happen like no one's gonna it's not gonna be an accident it's not gonna it's like me like I'm in charge here like we're just not gonna die babe um yeah

But yeah, that sounds fucking sweet. Well, I literally went and spent money and bought stupid fucking clothes. The clothes are pretty. Yeah, all the clothes are slay. Like, I have really good fucking taste. I'm going to do a haul on the Patreon. Slay. I almost suggested it, but I was like, I don't know. Yeah, no, I'm going to do a haul. Wow. I'm trying to lessen up on my gatekeeping.

Because it's like an issue. You know what's crazy is one of my friends in real life asked me what pants these were. And he was like, unless you're trying to gatekeep it from me. And I was like...

I was like, oh my God, people like literally think I'm like an actual gatekeeper. People who do that shit too, like face to face. Like if anyone asked me where something is on my body, I will say, or like asking what I'm listening to, I will say, but it's when it's like to a big audience on the internet that I'm like, all of you need to know, like come on.

um but yeah what did i do oh my god actually i have to say this i'm literally so nauseous from those fucking vitamins right now and i it's like bubbling up my throat because i didn't eat it with it i didn't have any food with it and it's like i have vitamin breath is that a fucking flum float no what is that is that i'm going to get it no no folk why is it shaped like this why did they make them short and stout

It's kind of pretty. Ew. No, stop. You can see where, like, since it's clear, you can see the wax. Oh, my God. Your lungs look like that. Yeah, it's bad. That's serve. You're serving apocalyptic sub... Your lungs are serving subversive basics. Yes, they're all ripped to shreds on the inside. And they're, uh...

What's the color palette? Neutral color palette. Earth tone. This is not a flum float. It's a real flume roam. And it's energy drink flavored. And it hurts me so bad. I wanted to show you this. You did it? What the hell? I'm so jealous. Dead ass body. I'll insert it on the podcast. I'll insert it on the podcast.

Ew, dude, I'm jealous. You do not have to air me out. This is actually an AirPods container. It's got my AirPods in it. I'm sorry. I literally saw it on the counter and I was like, is my brain like...

Like warping things because I thought they were tall. Um, so yeah my weekend I went shopping It was a vibe. I cried on my birthday. Oh, you cried again? You know, it's not my birthday unless I cry. You gotta cry on your birthday. No, I actually sobbed my little ass off. Was it like a good one or like a sad cry? It was sad. But it was sad but like also like at the end it was good but like I'll I'll like read like a small thing I wrote. Um

It's not that serious. It ain't that deep. I'm 23 and I feel like I've been pooping less and less, which is scary. I'm getting old and that means that my metabolism is slowing down. Also, I sobbed on my birthday because I'm so terrified of forgetting things and life is so sweet and fragile. And I wish I could just bottle everything up and hide it. And I love living so much. As painful as it is, I'm very stubborn and I don't want to not be a part of the beauty of living. And that's literally why I say it live. It's because I'm... You don't want to miss the beauty of living, which is me.

You would say that. Yeah, I guess. But like, you're taking it away like you're pretty. No, bitch, you're just like a fucking fool. I'm sexy, hot. I'm not pretty, I understand that. I'm sexy. You are attractive in a lot of ways. Oh! You are attractive in a sexual connotation. That was real. You're so... Whoa, okay. Okay. Are y'all gonna clap each other up or something? Okay.

- Yo, I'm gonna tap that later. For real. Oh shit. - While I'm on my notes, oh, and then the other thing I did is like, there was, in like Brooklyn, there was this thing, it was, it's called like Area 53. And it literally is what I just showed you. It's like, - Oh, it's like main event. - It's like an indoor, like there's like a little course, like a zip lining, like there's like a thing to fight and like, - Is there a laser tag? - All the shit, yeah. - I wanna do laser tag. - I wanna do laser tag. - So fucking bad. Maybe that's what we do for my birthday. - There's paintballing.

There was laser tag, paintballing, roller skating, arcade. Like, it was an insane array of things. One, when I got in there, I was like, I have not been this oversimulated in so fucking long. I went in the bathroom and they had a DJ and he was just like playing hella... Since the Universal ride? No. Oh my God, literally. One time I cried on the Fast and Furious Universal ride because it was the same sound that made me almost have a panic attack. It was that air like...

The air shooting. It was terrifying, but you were in the blast zone. It like blew you off. It literally blew the back of my neck off. But yeah, I almost had a panic attack in there, but it was a zip line and stuff. And I just like...

It was 21 and up, and I was just really intrigued because I was looking around, and I was like, it is comical. We're all adults. It's not like, oh, I just turned 18. I'm an adult. We are all grown-ass adults. Age-aggressing.

Is that a naughty thing? I don't know. I think age regressing is a naughty thing. Is it really? I don't know. I don't know. I just don't want to get in trouble for anything ever again. Yeah. True. But yeah, everyone was just playing. I don't know. It was so funny. It's cute. I wanted to record so many people because there was this ninja course with ropes hanging down from the wall. And there was this tall ass lanky dude all over.

all alone in the corner playing. And he was like, like really struggling because it's just like a balance thing. And he was about to bust his ass every three seconds. And I was like, this is insane because in any other context, like this man would not want to look this like demasculated. Like, I don't know how, like...

Not to get, like, too deep about it, but I was just like... It was just such a childish thing to see a grown man do that it was, like, hilarious. And I feel like any other context, he would not be okay with, like, being, like, laughed at. Yeah. But because we were all in there just being stupid, it was just, like, funny. That's really cute, actually. Yeah, it was just... And I'm jealous of that. It was fucking fun. I bet there was something like that in LA. I was like, damn, these... That's, like, also, if you're, like...

an old bag like i can say that because i'm literally old as shit um and you like didn't have the college experience and you're kind of like lonely that's like a great place to make friends and i'm being genuine like i feel like that's like a good place for weirdos to maybe but also everyone there was like in big groups of friends so then it's like the scariest place to go alone like you're scary if you go there alone you're a killer you're a killer and a watcher also there

that it was like filling it out. They didn't check our vax cards. All they had was this sign up thing, like the sign in thing that you had to put yes or no if you were vaxed. And there were a few no's and I was like, oh, like what the fuck is happening in here? But yeah, like Drew was saying, I've also been so fucking irritable the past four days. I'm going to blame it on my period because I literally was on my period. But like, really? Yeah, periods are gross.

You shouldn't knock something until you try it because it tastes really good. Periods are so gross at girls. But anyway, yesterday when I was... I'm written by a man. That's like, I'm going to start saying that. Can you shut the... Why is that a bad thing to be written by a man? If you were written by a man, you would have a plump, firm ass and like tiny, succulent tits. No, I had big jugs.

Big milkers. Her firm round ass and her tits that did not move when she walked until she fucked me. Mirakami. Yeah, literally. That's what I was thinking about. Anyways.

I have to tell my fucking airport story yesterday because it was literally the most irritating shit that's ever fucking happened to me. No, it is a nightmare. So, I was just really sad leaving New York. Don't have to get into details. I'm saying it like I'm hiding some shit. It's literally, I just love my friends there. You just love New York, yeah. I love being there and every time I leave, I'm sad. But then every time I'm here, I want to stay here longer. But whatever, it's like a big issue. But, um...

I was like sad leaving and I was like in the Uber fucking crying because I was just like, I don't know, like splitting my time between two places. Three places is like hard. So I was just like really emotional and it was a late flight and I was like, my only goal was

The only thing that will make me happy right now is if I just get in there, get through, get like a Starbucks drink, like a coffee. But like, it sounds stupid, but like, and literally it made sense because I was just like, I don't want to sleep on this flight. Like I need caffeine so I could stay up. And then when I get home, I can knock out cause I'll be tired.

So... Starby. I get to the airport and, like, I go and, like, pay for a checked bag and I'm, like, standing at the kiosk waiting for it to print my fucking bag tag and it just never comes out. So then I have to go get in this dumb line to go with all the other dumb folks who don't know how to fucking use a kiosk, which I think is so annoying. Like...

I'm not kidding. I genuinely think when I am in the airport, I am the only human with common sense in the airport. Like, and I genuinely believe that. I'm not even saying that like on a funny level. I genuinely think everyone in the airport except me is the dumbest person. What if we're in the airport together? Um, I'm still top tier. You're, you're just following behind me. So you're looking a little smart. I'd beg to differ. We can agree to disagree though. Um,

So I had to go get in fucking line, get my kiosk bag, whatever. That took long. And it's already like 7.15. And in my head, I hadn't checked when that Starbucks closes, but I was like, it's definitely not open late. It's like those dumb motherfuckers always close early, which makes no sense. It's an airport. There's hella people here always. Anyways, I get in line at fucking TSA and there was two lines and I saw one that looked short. It looked like it was moving quick and I went to walk there and this lady stopped me and she's like,

Oh, you could go this way. There's two lines this way. So I'm like, okay. And I almost lied and was like, my flight board's in 10 minutes. I need to go now. But I was like, whatever. Let me not be like a liar. So I turned and I went. And as I'm walking to the shorter line, it gets cut off by one of the other TSA agents. They cut it off. And then now I'm stuck in this one big ass line with a family of genuinely four fucks.

And an infant. And I was like, awesome. I'm going to be in this line forever. Everyone's moving slow as shit. Like, they literally don't have a flight to get on. And then this girl, this fucking bitch. She, like, I'm about to put my stuff down. And she comes up with, like, one of the TSA agents. And he's like, all right, put your stuff down. Like, skipping. Was she pretty? No. Okay. I feel like, for some reason, I feel like she didn't have a mask on. Because I know exactly what her whole fucking face looks like.

i know what her whole dumb face looks like because when i got in the airport she was literally waltzing around talking on the phone without her mask on and i was like this dumb like also i get to call her a and a piece of bitch because she's like my age so like i should slap the out of her um so she was literally lounging around talking on the phone and she literally goes yeah i've been here forever like that's what i heard her say on the phone but now this is skipping me wow and i was like

I have a feeling this dumb cunt is on my flight and she fucking lied. Talking about it's gonna be late. She's gonna be late. She's not gonna be fucking late.

Anyways, she's moving slow as shit. She has the most things I've ever seen a human fucking travel with as a carry-on in my life. She has two pairs of shoes tied to the sides of a bag and like three jackets on her. Oh, she's a tweaker. Yeah, she's literally like dope sick in the airport. I need aid. She finally gets through. I finally get through. I need aid. I don't have any aid for you right now, Drew.

She finally gets through. I finally get through. And I'm just like so annoyed and angry and like irritable now. Because now I'm just like angry instead of sad. And I'm like...

borderline to the Starbucks. Like, I literally am cutting around people, like, trying to take shortcuts. I'm, like, speedwalking my ass off, and I get as far as I am from Drew right now to the line, and a worker comes and cuts off the line right as I'm about to walk in line, and I just stand there and stare, and I literally start crying. Like, I just start sobbing, because I was like, that was the most, like, irritating opportunity

Also, on top of everything, the Uber was like a $70 Uber and it was like a 45 minute ride. So I was just like, this has been the most irritating hour and a half of my fucking life. And now I have to get on a five hour flight. Yeah. And I saw my ass off and then I told this to Drew, but I immediately put on my finstone on my story. I was like, if my plane crashes today, I will be the luckiest woman on earth. And then I got really scared of my plane.

crashing so i took it it would have been iconic though i took it down before anybody saw it because i got scared oh my god i also took it down because i was like what if my plane does crash everyone who sees this is gonna feel so bad because they're gonna see it and be like she's so silly well i fell in the shower i fell in the shower so it was probably because of me honestly because i use my oh shit it has been has it been i heard it i didn't want to bring it up oh

You bastard. No, we're in a good groove right now, Kai. You don't get to pee. You get to pee in a cup. Yeah, like you're like. You think you get bathroom breaks? What is this, Amazon? You don't get bathroom breaks here. I actually have to really pee bad too. No, we'll go pee together in the toilet. Y'all can hold each other's wieners. Ooh, that sounds cool. I guess I'll wait. Let me think about it.

Let me think about it real quick. I don't know if Kite should be allowed to pee. Welcome back. We just had a piss break. We opened up our holes and just let it all out. Yeah, I just spread and then squeezed. Squeezed? Internally. Oh, okay.

That is actually a crazy mechanic that like humans have. Is that like we just open the gates and they just, it like comes out. Like you flex your abs a little bit. Like I can do it like I unconsciously just like pee. Yeah. That's weird. No? It's weird. Shut the fuck up. It is though. Like it is kind of like curious. Yeah.

But yeah, you were saying you slipped in the shower? Yeah, that's all I wanted to say about it. When? Wait, when was it? When you were in New York. It was in the midst of my anger. Wait, was it the first day you got back from Grand Canyon, though?

I don't remember exactly what day it was. Because it might have been fully my fault. Oh my God. It literally was. And it was the fucking oil pouches, right? Yeah. Those Glossier bath bombs are so incredibly... Okay. Glossier has bath oil things that are so incredibly...

oily like I have bath oils that work and like aren't that oily but those ones you kind of need like two for like the aroma like therapy vibes yeah but they are so incredibly oily it makes it like dangerous yeah it was scary like okay just imagine this like

You butt naked. I'm a butt ass naked, grown ass, disgusting man in the shower. Which is sexy. And I'm just washing my body. And when I wash my body, I step out of the stream of the shower. I don't know if that's a normal... That's something we don't discuss is like shower habits. Like...

Like, no one showers the same. There's no way everybody showers the same. But, like, when I'm, like, washing my body, I get out of the water and I just stand in, like, the least stream of water. I don't know how to explain it. And I, like, wash my body, whatever. And as I was walking back into the stream, I didn't, like, completely collapse. But, like, I, like, did, like, the little foot thing. Like, whoop.

and like slipped and it felt like I was falling for like 30 seconds and I just like collapsed in my side I didn't catch myself on there because like when I went to grab slip down but it like took most of my fall and I just like like hit that on my side no bruise I'm good no lung no lung damage all that like I'm good but yeah no lung damage yeah I didn't like puncture along with my rib or anything yeah

I'm a strong boy. That's fully my fault. And I was ass naked, too. It's so. And I thought about it before. Before I left, I was like, this is going to be the slipperiest thing ever. And then I just like it left my mind. I was going to break something up that I have to ask. I don't I don't know if I can bring it up. I'm scared.

Should I talk about my Tony Lopez DMs? Yes, please. Talk about the fucking Tony Lopez DMs. Are you kidding me? Trolling that man is the funniest thing you've ever done. Or... Close to the funniest thing. Or should we... No, I'll save this shit. This shit is so stupid. Like... No, you save it. I don't even want to read it. Okay. I'm shocked. So...

Tony Lopez, as most of you know, is a TikToker who... Is an evil man. Yeah. Evil person. Not a good person. Um...

Those little Lopez brothers. Those freaks. Bad guys. We don't have to get into what he's done. We all know he's no bueno. But before all that shit came out, when he was still in the hype house and at the peak of his shit, in 2020, randomly, I was like... I went through a phase where I was like, I want to see how many random men I can talk to. And just kind of troll and like...

flirt with and see like where it goes like what conversations can i have with these motherfuckers of course um so tony oh my god looking at the d it's so much um so it starts on july 15th 2020 at 5 20 p.m i just say you are so fucking hot mind you i didn't follow him or anything like i didn't follow him like it was never like that and he's july 17 2020 he says hey queen i say

Hi, Tony. It has an extra H in there. Literally, you and Tony are like two queens maximizing your joint slay. Hey, queen. And he says, hey, heart. And I said, um, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. Hi. He says, what you doing, love? Also, I'll put it all on screen so you can see all this typed out. Or I won't. I will. That's his fucking job. He says, what you doing, love? Smiley face. Oh, wait. Should we read this like you're him?

Fine, I'll be fucking Tony. Okay. You know I can't read out loud, though. We have to, like... Okay. You are so fucking hot. Hey, queen! I'm just, like, I'm really, like, getting into the role. You're, like, you're hella flamboyant. Hi, Tony. Hey. Um, hi. What you doing, love? Um...

Nothing. How about you? Sorry I am so awkward. I am nervous. It's okay. It's honestly kind of cute. Can I sing for you? Please. What is your favorite song? Literally anything Weekend or Frank Ocean. Is this a Casey Frey thing? LMAO. Who is that? Stop playing. Sing me this song. For side context, I thought he was getting a little snarky and rude. No.

Can you sing Suit and Tie by Justin Timberlake? Uh, I might sound stupid, but I'll try. And then I was like, he's catching on and I don't like this. So I just stopped replying. But then he was feeling a little crazy. So four hours later, he says... What's your number? Hi, I don't have a phone. Dang. Dang.

And then months later, like a month later, I go, I miss us. Do you like my haircut? Because this is when I got my pixie cut. I was just making sure he was still interested. I don't know. He sends a crazy fucking photo. I have to see if I can find it, but I have a video of me and Orion opening the photo together. Ew. Ew. Ew. Literally, both of us audibly go...

Because he started, he was trying to, I think, cater to my senses and like be funny. But his version of funny was like silly derp face funny. Derp. Ernie Gerd. So I did a thing. Ew. So I said, do you like my haircut? And he sent like a photo of himself. And I said, yeah.

Are you okay? And then he sent a video of himself. And he was twerking and like shaking his ass. And it was like disgusting. No, literally he had his leg up by his head. It was like a very like. It was weird. I was like you were. He was showing how flexible he was. Yeah, he wanted me to turn that thing out. I love the hair. Thanks. You were scaring me kind of. Why? And then he sent another video. And I think in the video he was like, can't sleep right now. Derp. Like that was his vibe. So I said, this is literally you right now.

What's this meme? When you can't sleep so you stay up looking at memes. And he goes... And sends another photo of...

Then I never replied and then all the shit came out and I was like, I'm gonna continue trolling him and see if he just like keeps replying or is at this point is he like really not fucking with people he doesn't know 'cause he's like scared of getting exposed again or some shit. I'm sure a lot of y'all have noticed we don't have many ads anymore and you're probably thinking, wow, oh my God, I feel so bad for them. They deserve ads, but we're doing our job. You're not doing your job. You need to fucking subscribe and engage with me or I will never do my job again.

I like, I can't believe I miss reading ads. I like, I miss the taste. So then again, like a month later I say,

Also, for context, no more Drew saying his replies because I have not heard from him since, but he sees every single one of my DMs. He opens them all without fail, and this has been going on for a year. August 20th, 2020. Can I see your abs? August 21st, 2020. Is that a no?

July 15th. Let's set up the situations like that we're in. We're in a big group of people every single time one of these messages is sent. And we're projecting the DMs onto our TV through screen share. And it's just a whole group like laughing fucking out loud. Yeah, just like cracking up because we want to see him open it. And he always opens it. Like he always opens it.

Is that a no? July 15th. Do you ever think of me? Oh, this is a year later now. This is July 15th, 2021. Do you ever think of me? July 18th. Hello? August 22nd. September 7th.

Please. Can I call you? I need someone right now. Help. I need a ride. Uber is being weird about masks and I'm not into this vac shit between us. Don't screenshot. And then we sent a selfie of Finn. Come and get me. Now. Can you send a selfie so I know it's you replying and not your manager or something? I know you miss me. Whatever. And then, also this is

all at like 10 p.m. All within the same five seconds. So he opens that. Doesn't say anything. Rude. September 16th. I know you're awake. Give your number. Please. I need to call right now. Please. Minutes later, I say, hello. Your phone is ringing, Drew.

Damn, my phone is blowing up right now. It's actually crazy how many friends I have. Sure. September 16th. Hey, I'm trapped. I sent a photo and I don't remember what the photo is. Probably you in a dark place in our house. There's an air vent you can access me from. Don't share. I know you have a girlfriend, but are you free right now? And then this was the latest one. December 13th. I replied to his selfie and I said, stop, JK, stop.

Crying emoji, glove emoji. Hey, do you know me? Me on first date, the circle with an X through it and the glove. And I said, do you get it in terms of protection? Whatever. What the fuck is wrong with you? And then he saw that. So it just says seen. Dude, such a cursed ass vibe. Sending the no glove emoji and saying me in terms of protection. I have an air vent you can access me from.

Dude, that's actually crazy that you brought up your DMs with Tony Lopez because I, yesterday, was scamming a scammer in my DMs. It was awesome. What's that? Okay, so one of my, like, locals' accounts got hacked.

And at first, I thought it was real. It was like the most strange DM I've ever gotten in my entire life, like from someone from my hometown. And he just said, hey. And I said, what's up? He said, hi.

I really need your help right now. And immediately red flag, like, okay, we haven't spoken six years. Like you don't need my fucking help. And I said, shoot. He said, I need $50 right now. I will give it back to you tomorrow morning with praying emoji. Um, and I are automatically knew it was a scam from here.

And I said, what for? He said, I want to get some medications and groceries from the store. I'm really down at the moment. And I said, what? And he said, what? And I said, sorry, I can give you money, but you have to do something for me. I only have $15 arm.

Okay, where should I send it? Wait, I freed up some funds. I can send you $1,000. I don't want a friend in need to suffer. Okay, Venmo or PayPal? Perfect. I said perfect. He sent his Venmo. And also he's dumb as shit because his Venmo doesn't match my local's name. And he said, send it here and send a screenshot after you send it. And I said, also, I have one more question before I send the money.

He said, Oh yeah, I, you felt.

I didn't respond. I opened it. He said, where are you? Are you there? And I said, sorry, I'm really nervous because I think I loved you and I want to rekindle this relationship. Is the spark still there? Am I wasting my time?

I'm about to send the money, but I need you to tell me you love me. I got this scammer to say, I love you so much with two red hearts. And then I said, oh my God, thank you. I love you too. Can you send me a nude of your body for old time's sake? And then I sent a screenshot that I photoshopped of me sending him money. I sent money to my sister and she has yet to send me the money back. And I think she's going to steal the thousand dollars from me. And then I said, I sent it.

Video call. He didn't answer. I said, hello? Still no answer. Nudes, please. Nudes now, please. I'm begging you. I just sent you $1,000 and this is how you repay me. Video call. No answer. He said, thank you. And I said, nude. Video call. No answer. Video call. No answer. He said, what the fuck? You do me fake payment. Fuck you. And I said, how do I fake that?

Who got it then? The money left my account. It's not a real payment. Don't fuck me, dude, is what I said to him. And then he said, send me your balance. And I sent him a photo, shopped of my balance with the...

with it saying I sent it to him. I said, this, can you send it back? I'm starting to regret this. I don't know how I'm going to pay my bills. He said, I don't see anything here. My dad has cancer and I have to pay for his chemo. I shouldn't have done this. Is there a way I can get my money back? I'll give you $200 if you give me my money back.

He said, I don't see anything. And I said, oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. This is so bad. This is fucked. This is so bad. How am I going to pay for anything now? I have so much love that gave and nowhere to put it. This is God punishing me for something I did. What the fuck do I do? He said, fuck you. Do me fake payment. And I said, please, please send it back. I'm begging you. And I said, oh, my God, wait. Ha ha. It didn't go through. Ha ha.

Thank God, I thought he sent $1,000 away. He said, "I said I don't see anything here." And I was like, "Wow, thank you so much for helping me." Dude, somehow Venmo sent me $1,250 back, so I made $250. What the hell?

He was like, I said, wait, do you still need the cash? And then I sent this photo. I said, my beautiful sister. Yours is so much better. Are you kidding me? And then I just was like, fuck you, scammer bitch. I hope you learned a valuable lesson. How did you even fall for that? Like, actually.

That's fucking awesome. Wait, you think I'll give you $200 if you send me the $1,000 back? I really just wanted him to send me money. I wanted him to send me at least a dollar so I could have just scammed a scammer. I got a lot of fun out of it. Dude, that's so fucking fun. Sometimes in life, you just have to have fun. Write that down, y'all. Quote me on that. Sometimes you just gotta make fun. What?

I was trying to like you made a quote that I wanted to I made a good quote and you made sometimes just fun I said sometimes you just I don't know what I said I literally don't know what I said I literally don't I'm actually fucking dope sick right now like for my birthday I tried H and like I can't like I want it so bad

But I can't go back. I can't. We're going to Mexico and I'm buying drugs over the counter. I don't care. I'm gonna have a bender. Kai, did you realize that you can buy all drugs over the counter in Mexico? What? Yes. You can buy any drug. Not any drug, but like prescription drugs. So I'm about to relax. I'm about to relax. Come on. Wait, okay. I'll go through my notes for funsies. That was a joke.

I'm stronger than that. I have willpower. I said, I refuse to take birth control. I'm very much serving fertile, but I do want to get pregnant. Not for the sake of having a baby, but for the sake of the drama. And then getting to drink alcohol with cum in my ovaries. Oh my fucking God. Because technically if I drank while I found out I was pregnant, it's not like a baby baby yet, so it's not the fun of being like...

thing i guess no once you're once you're serving positivity in pregnancy like you're serving baby to like a very small scale we don't have to get into that literally what are you saying right now i'm saying i'm pro-choice okay that's like that was a long way to say in the end we got there yeah are you sure yes um

I actually don't care. Also, this is really fucked up because like this is coming from like my brain and like a flow of consciousness. I actually don't care about learning things that are important on an academic level. I'm literally an animal. I want to have sex and have fun. I,

Hedonistic. Yeah. We're all on the same page. Why do I have to learn things? Like, I don't, like, I don't give a fuck. It's all society bullshit that society just made up for us. I know. We sound like every teenager. Like, this is like, this isn't going to work in real life. Like, I don't need to know this. Literally everyone in Euphoria. Um, yeah.

I wish I did learn how to pay my taxes. Yeah, I still don't know how that works. I just hope and pray. I give it a little prayer and I'm still here. I evaded my taxes for like three years and I finally paid them all this year. I finally paid for your balls, your ball surgery, your big balls.

You wanted them enhanced and I gave that to you. I do. No, you did. I did. They're big and I mean, now you literally have to wear like something to hold them down. It's actually, I have to wear a girdle down there. Grandma's panties. Why do I genuinely think I'm the smartest person on earth when I'm actually so stupid? Yeah. So right after that, like academic thing, I actually think I'm the only person in the world who can make right decisions. Like, and I, and I believe that with my whole chest.

I am right. I'm always right. There's like no fighting that. But you say that like kind of jokingly, but you have been right 92% of your life. Yeah. You know what it is? It's like as stupid as I am academically, I have like...

I have good intuition and like I'm pretty emotionally intelligent. So and I'm also pessimistic and like that works out for me because I always am like that bitch is trying to do something slick. And it always is like that, man. I want to blow something up so bad, but I know I'll get addicted to it and become an actual problem to society. I think what we need to do is we need to buy a building and blow it up. We need to buy or like rent out a building.

Like, we need to, like, find a plot of land, construct a little building, and blow it up. No, I want, like, big. I want, like, a big, big fucking building. I've said this before, so we're on the same page here. Yeah, but I want, like, I want to, like, make a flyer and, like, give free drinks so people are, like, tempted to go for, like, free alcohol because you can get anybody to go anywhere if you put substance on a flyer. Okay, David Dobrik. Oh, my fucking God. Ha ha ha!

I don't know if I'm allowed to say that. You could get anyone to be in a 4 minute and 20 second vlog if you got some alcohol in there. No, we need to keep touching on this before you move on. I need to keep touching on you before I die. Come on. Clap me up. No, we need to...

We need to find building demolitions near us. No, but the thing is I want it to be so fucking dangerous. Have you ever seen one of those demolition videos and something accidentally flies really close to someone's head and they don't die? I need that. I want that. We can recreate that with Tannerite. Do you know what Tannerite is? Yeah, it's the thing that Tiger King was blowing up.

Oh, actually, yeah. You can buy it over the counter at Walmart in Texas. You can buy a bunch of Tannerite. We should buy it and blow it up in the house. It's a legal explosive, which is insane. But the reason it's legal is because you have to like, you can't like just ignite it with a fire. You have to like shoot it with a gun.

but we could get a bunch of Tannerite and blow up a house with it. Theoretically, we would have to like literally have like an automatic rifle and like blow up a bunch of it at once. Yeah. Well, no, you just make a big pile. There's a video. Yeah. There's a video of someone doing, putting a bunch of Tannerite in a car. Um,

and shooting it and like a door from the car flies at them at like terminal velocity and they have to like dodge it it's like the scariest thing I've ever seen I just want to blow some shit up but yeah I know I'll get really addicted to it I know it like I know it and then I'll be like I can blow everything up and I'll blow someone up if they piss me off like I will if you give me the power I'll blow you that leads to the next thing I said I don't know if I want to read this

No, the last part though. The last part is facts like the neti part the neti I don't know why I can't read I'm like losing my brain. I'm losing my brain Sucking dick is like using a neti pot. It literally can have the same effects Personally, they get clears your sinuses. Yes, literally like I literally I mean it makes sense like like if you press here on your face and

Oh, something that I unlocked in Texas when I had COVID is I had one of those Theraguns. And if you put it on your cheeks while you have congestion, it like shakes it all out. And congestion is really just inflammation of the sinuses. It's not that there's snot up there. It's not gets trapped up there and it inflames your sinuses. So if you just massage it and like... What are you doing? What? I'm just massaging my face. Next time, next time, your congestion just suck dick.

It literally works. Like, dude. But then you're going to give the person a disease. With your snot? With your cold. Okay. I guess. I have one note that I need to read. We need to save Mason Ramsey, the yodeling kid. What is... Are y'all seeing that light? I'm not kidding. It's fucking coming.

It was literally the cat. I thought I was being like skit toys. You know what's awesome? It's our reactions because my brain saw that in the corner of my eye and I was like... I know, I saw it and I was like, okay, the shield is thin. We're combining worlds right now. The veil is thin. If you see a lot of shit out of the corner of your eyes, the veil is thin. Okay, I understand.

Psycho suspense. Yeah, I was like, what? What's up with him? Where is he? That's the thing. I don't know where he is. We need to free Mason Ramsey. Okay, so Rebel Wilson and Mason Ramsey. They're trapped somewhere. I think, okay, what made me write that down is like Mason Ramsey. Okay, I'm cutting for Mason Ramsey. I'm going to start the hashtag cutting for Mason Ramsey. Remember that one?

Cutting for Axel Weber. Do you know Axel Weber? No, but do you remember when it came out that like, I know, I think it came out that like Zayn was smoking weed and like people were like cutting for Zayn. Like people were so freaked out by like him smoking weed. That's got to be the most traumatic shit to experience as like a celebrity. I'd be so fucking pissed. I'd be like, y'all are dumb as fuck. Y'all aren't loyal enough. Our viewers are not loyal enough. No.

Never once have I seen that abstract. It's always, "Free Kai! Free Kai!" It's never cutting for emergency in a drama. It's never cutting for Drew and Inya. No, please actually don't partake in that because I'll fucking shoot you in the face. If you partake in self-harm, I'm not angry with you, but I'm disappointed in you. We can joke about it. We are allowed to joke about it. Yeah, we are, baby.

I'm sucking Drew's finger right now. But I'm going to look into Mason Ramsey. People who are just listening don't know that that's a lie. I'm going to look into Mason Ramsey right now. And you can just carry the podcast and I'll get some information. I'm trying to think of anything else. Okay. Immediately. Sorry. Yes. This is a bit, no? What is he singing? His song, but he's working at Subway.

I don't know. I think it's a bit. It's like when Trisha acts like she was working at Domino's. He's in his Trisha Paytas era. That's toxic. If that's a bit, that's as far as I'll go. Acting like you're working just like a regular job. Yeah. Why are famous people obsessed with doing that? Being like, I'm just like you. Like...

I'm like, I'm sitting here like, have I done that before? Like as a bit. And I'm like, we did work the heaven store, but it wasn't as a bit. We actually literally worked. That wasn't a bit. That was a vibe. That's the difference. Some of y'all are making bits and some of us are literally creating. Curating vibes. I'm going to put my ID vibe curator. Like, cause that's kind of what I am. You need to actually start that fucking app soon. My vibe curation, the vibe curation destination. VCB. Oh, VCD.

BCD tofu. Let's hit that spot actually soon. I'm gonna fucking hit you in the face, bitch. They got that really creamy fucking tofu. Come on. Come on, tofu. I'm in my meat-eating era. I love a good meat in my mouth. You are in your meat-eating era. She actually is. It's crazy. I love filling my hole with meat. All of her orifices are just filled with meat. Yeah, it's honestly like it's toxic. Whores. Whores or pores? Whores. Oh.

Pores filled with meat. I literally, if you gave me the option every day to eat prosciutto with cheese, crackers, and honey. Specifically creamy goat cheese. Yeah, that cream. We just love a good cream. We're actually on the cream team. We love a good cream and meat combo. We're on the creamy meat. Get the fuck away from us. Don't touch his hand. Reach a little further. Reach a little further. If you want it so bad, you gotta reach. You gotta get in camera, man. Come on, you should get to me too. Lift up. Oh, you've been in camera this entire time. I just was looking at the wrong side.

Like E.T.? Phone home. Hey, that's what I'm going to make a rap called phone home. E.T. phone home. What? Okay. Like what? What does that fucking? E.T. hell. Like Lucas is saying. E.T.A. P.T.A. Paul Thomas Anderson. Speaking of, I saw Magnolia in theater and it was different from how I remembered it. I'm going to be honest.

That's honestly the most awesome review of a movie ever. I was so excited. Your jaw like... You had a big underbite. I remember it being...

Like a lot better. Yeah, it was awesome. And then what it was is the environment I was in. Let me paint a picture. It was at the Beverly News Cinema. Literally, how are you going to paint a picture? Bitch, I'm a fucking artist. I can paint a picture with my fucking words. It was 7.30 showing, dark outside, a little chilly, a little foggy. We show up to the Beverly News Cinema, which is...

Quentin Tarantino's theater that has to be on film. He's such a fucking weirdo about it, which I respect all of his weird quirks so much. But it has to be on film. And obviously that attracts the most disgusting crowd of people you can imagine. Like, cinephiles, like, just gross people who are obsessed with movies. Like, immediately after... I almost just said something so bad. I know what you're gonna say. And just keep it by your tongue. By your tongue. Um...

The most disgusting group of people that immediately after they watched the movie, they went to Letterboxd and wrote, saw on 35 millimeter, because we saw it on 35 millimeter, because it has to be on film if it's going to be in Tarantino's theater. We pull up. We had our tickets already. I'm going to break in and play a DVD on these motherfuckers. He would freak his fucking, he would lose his shit. I'm not kidding. He would freak out. Yeah.

Just imagine the crowd of people that were there. It's just gross, gross people. Well, we sit down in our seats and obviously like we do a little trolling. Like our group of people were trolls. We do a little trolling. We're loud as shit. We're making jokes. We're obnoxious. And the movie hasn't started yet. No one said anything, but I could feel eyes darting. And like it wasn't a good vibe that we had curated. So like we all like settled down. We all immediately understand that like, oh, like we...

Shouldn't be rambunctious in this because people are actually angry with us. So we chilled we chilled out and then I went to the concession stand because he played like 40 previews before the movie for some fucking reason and When I came back someone had sat in the seat right next to mine, which like okay, not a big deal I was scarfing down my fucking hot dog. I ate the shit out of that hot dog One of the best movie hot dogs I've ever had if not the best movie hot dog I ever had and

I start smelling the smell and I'm like, oh dear fucking God. And it was like, it was like a shit odor mixed with the stale cigarettes. And like, do you know, like when you wear a mask a couple of times, like your breath, like kind of imprints on the mask. So when you put it on, it's not disgusting to you, but like if you smelled someone else's, you would like be physically repulsed. Yeah. Well, that smell was radiating from this person. So he had been wearing this mask that he was wearing for ages at

Probably since the beginning of the pandemic. Maybe months, potentially months. And he sat down next to me. He just smelled like cigarettes, which I can get past the shit smell and the cigarette smell. But what happened next was an atrocity. It was a war crime. Like I actually was, I should, it was a hate crime. Like it was not okay. He was sitting there.

And he had taken his mask off. He was burping the entire movie. And it was the most rancid fucking burps I had ever smelt in my entire life. Like, like, piercing. Stop it right fucking now. Furious, like, hot fucking guttural, deep gut burps. Maybe from his...

colon, like maybe or ascending colon, like maybe from like a part of his body that like burps have never come from before because they were rancid. Like burn your eyes, make your eyes water. Yeah. I fully would have gotten up and moved. No. And it was the entirety of the movie. And I was sitting next to Elsie and I was embarrassed because I was like, I hope Elsie doesn't think I'm the one burping. So in every periodically, like he would burp and I would like actually like gag and

I'm like actually about to start throwing up now. Like I'm not kidding. It was like that bad.

My eyes are watering again. I have watery mouth. And you know when your mouth goes watery right before you throw up. I would, like, have to lean into her airspace to, like, breathe air when these burps happened. And it wasn't, like... It wasn't, like, oh, like, once every ten minutes. It was, like, once every five minutes. And it was so hard to enjoy this movie that I had already seen. And it's already the longest fucking movie ever made. It was three hours. It was a four-hour affair. Like, the entire event. And, like, I just, like...

That's why it was better or worse than I remember. But it's still a classic and the soundtrack is fucking incredible. That sounds like a fucking... Ew, dude, I fully would have left. I would have been so mad. I considered it several times and I was like, I can't make a scene in front of all these people. But yeah, it was really, really bad. That's just gross. I don't even have anything to say. It's just so nasty. I'm thinking about them. Yeah.

You're going to cry. Well, I didn't see any fucking movies. We were on a good one right before we left. I know. It's literally because I don't have TikTok, so now I just watch movies. Oh, wait. On the plane? What did I watch? Oh, no. I didn't watch a movie. I read a book. I was reading. I've been reading more. I've been watching more movies because I don't have TikTok anymore. Should I delete TikTok live right now? No, I need it. I don't know because one of the things I wrote was this. What?

Also, I haven't had TikTok for like a week and I think it's made me a bigger bitch because I have too much time to wither away and think about things that shouldn't bother me. So I'm going to get it again, I think. Well,

Wow. Because like now I'm just like, instead of being irritated. You detox for a week. Yeah, instead of being irritated with random people. But I think I still can't even do it. Like I realized I had it on my iPad and on the plane I started watching and I was like, I really don't fucking care to watch anything right now. Like I don't care to watch a TikTok. It just gives nothing to the world. Yeah, it's just like not the content I want. And I was like, if I'm going to dedicate like even an ounce of thought, I'd rather dedicate it to a show or a movie because at least that's like...

Not, I don't want to sound like an old bag and be like, TikTok is so stupid. Because I do, like, I'm sure you agree too. There are TikToks that, like, do cater to, like,

cultural importance and like they're teaching things and they're funny. Architectural TikTok, I love it. Yeah, there's like a lot of parts of TikTok that are really good but for the most part like at the core of it which is also how I use it it's kind of just like to look at yourself to like see trends like that's not really I didn't use it to see trends but like a lot of it was like

Also fueling this weird game of like... Trying to find something first. And like... I don't know. Like I just don't... There's like such an undertone of competition. And like...

insecurity in TikTok that it was starting to like really feed into me. And I was like, I don't like that. Like, I don't want to carry that. And like, that's crazy that you thought about it like that. Cause me, Jake, um, me and Jake had like a really long phone call where we literally said the, those exact things where it's like, I think the introduction of like comments with like, and being able to like a comment is like one of the most toxic things. And like it rise to the top of like a comment chart. Like, I think that's one of the most toxic things ever.

The internet has ever done. Because already. The internet is an incredibly hateful place. Because like people. I mean. We perpetuate it. It's like. Whatever. Yeah. But like. Being able to like. Say something really fucking hateful. And then watch it rise the charts. It just like. Triggers something in your brain. To like. Be like. Okay. Like. I'm gonna get addicted to. Saying mean things. And hopefully. It rises to the top of the chart. I think also like. Not. Of course I know that I perpetuate. Like a lot of like. Hate and bitterness. But.

And not to be like, but I get a pass. I think there's a really big difference between the bitterness that's on TikTok. It is so driven into... It's driven by morality. Yeah, like morality and ego and like... Better than thou. Yeah, like mentality that it's not a fun bitterness. Because I can get down with like... The camera's not recording. I'm not kidding. Shut the fuck up. You're so annoying. I can get down with like...

Like, and what's crazy is for the first time we're having a real, like, introspective conversation for, like, the first episode in, like, eight and he has to cut it off. Like... Can't help myself. But, yeah, I'm down for, like, bitterness and, like, gossip and, like, being a fucking cunt. Like, I live for it. I love it. But something about TikTok, like, cuntyism is really, really deep. And, like, it's just a lot of anger. I think literally the pushing point was...

Which, this is gonna sound stupid, but, like, I saw this thread where people... Someone said something about someone I know. And the sentence itself, I was like, this is a perfect, like, sentence to prove how fucking delusional the people specifically on this app are. Because it was a sentence along the lines of... It was talking about someone I know, which maybe this is biased. But I think if it was about anyone, I'd be like, no, you're pushing it. Because basically, the sentence was like...

I hate so-and-so and that they have this empire that they built. They don't deserve it. And I was like, do you hear yourself in that sentence? Like you hate this person because they built something. It's not even like this person who I'm thinking of, like comes from like money.

And like. Nepotism. Like. It's not even like that. You're literally. The sentence you just said is insane. Yeah. It's like. You don't think this person deserves the thing they worked for. Lacking critical thought. Yes. It's just like. It goes. It's just. Think. Think a little bit. I'm the last person to say. Think before you speak. No. Because I literally. There really. I think there really is a difference. And I think that's why. Like. Like.

Not that we get away with it. I'm sure there are people who don't fuck with how bitter and annoying we are. But there is something to be said. Because it's always been on the internet. Think about Fran Lebowitz, for instance. She's bitter and annoyed by everyone and frustrated to the core of her being.

But she's a really good comedian. And not to be like, we're really fucking good comedians. But there is a difference between we say our stupid shit and then we move on. There is such a deep hatred in TikTok that there isn't a moving on. It's kind of coming from a real place. Yeah, it's coming from a very real place. And then it's not fun. And I found myself, because I am bitter, leaning into it. And then I was like, I don't like this. This isn't a fun game. Y'all are all so fucking angry. Like...

Literally watch a movie. I've said it so many times. TikTok is the worst thing in modern history to happen to humans. Like, it's so evil. It's diabolical. Will I stop using it? Probably not because I am addicted and my brain loves the little serotonin hits. But I find myself, like, scrolling for hours just lost on it. And I'm like, what did I watch? I couldn't tell you the last video I watched other than Mason Ramsey. That is a curious case. We need to...

figure that out um but yeah i don't know if i'll get tiktok again like i do miss it for like because again in that same context like i love a good serve moment like i love a good reason just for like being pretty yeah like to get on there and be pretty and be sexy and i like love watching other people feel themselves and whatever i don't know if i'll get it again because i'm just like maybe this is better that i don't do this and i have a lot of movies to watch i have a lot of

You got to catch up. Things to catch up with on the other side. So I think I'm going to chill. I'm going to chill off TikTok. I did get it back to comment on, I can't say her name. Soley? So toxic thought syndrome. Oh, yeah. I did. I didn't have to redownload it. Or I guess I technically did because I got on my iPad. But whatever.

iPad baby. Yeah, I commented on her TikTok. But yeah, I'm off the app. I don't fuck with it. It scares me. It's too much. It's too mean. And that's coming from a certified fucking cunt. Yeah. I feel like the second I'm like, this shit's too mean. It might be real. It might be like crazy because I am a fucking bitch. Also not to mention this like, it made it where like anybody can feel like a tits.

tinge of fame. So like you like post a video and like you immediately go viral and then people are like addicted to that. I just, it just like depresses people. Like it, cause like you get like this, like you build this like really big audience, but like it doesn't really translate. And then, I don't know, I've just seen like a bunch of people like posting on like close friends and things like that, that like came from TikTok. And it makes me really sad because I'm like, these people are awesome and genuinely funny people. But like, I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I haven't fleshed out that thought. It's a really, like, recycling app. Or not recycling, but it, like, rinses through people, like, so quick. And it's just, like, it's really not. The turnover rate is crazy. Yeah, it's just, like, not really good. And, like, I think as I get older, too, I don't know where I've said this, but I've said this before. Oh, I was having a conversation with a friend where I was, like, the older I get, I, like, really do feel bad for...

Like the younger generations behind us. Because we got like the internet where... A lot of people use the internet for like...

using the internet's sake. Like, it was just, like... It was a fun place to go and disconnect and, like, find things to be interested in. And it wasn't so, like, in tune with your life. Oh, well, describing getting on the internet as, like, disconnecting from reality, like, in a healthy way, kind of, in the beginning. And now it's, like, you have to disconnect from the internet because it's unhealthy. Yeah. It used to be, like, a fun escape from reality. And now I think it's, like...

it's it's this hyper reality that doesn't fucking exist it's like just all these I don't know it's a huge conversation but I was like I feel bad for like the younger generation because the way they get they have to use the internet now is really like intertwined with their real life so they have to be on it even though it's like unhealthy because like the thing is when we were using the internet and when people even older than us were using the internet like

we were using it because we really liked using it and now i feel like most teenagers have no choice but to use it because that's the only way to really connect with your friends relationships yeah that's why we need a decentralized internet right kai yes we need an internet peer-to-peer owned internet not owned by these evil corporations like google and microsoft and don't say all that we're not going to get our ads

I love Google, Microsoft, and Apple. Please sponsor me. But no, genuinely, like, if it wasn't controlled by these, like, money-hungry corporations, like, it would be a fun place because that's what it was in the beginning. It was, like, everybody was learning what it was. But when you really think about it at this point, it's, like, so far past that. It's just now it's human nature. It's always been human nature to want, like,

like fame and like attention and to feel seen now it's just on such a grand level that like no that's what i mean it's like in they like infected our lives with it like they like pushed it on to us in like very unhealthy way like now like you literally cannot survive without the internet basically i had i had this idea i heard this quote um jim carrey said where he's like

I wish everybody could experience fame so they could know that it's not that great or something. Something along those lines. And I do think that TikTok's really bad, but my optimistic thought was that it's almost democratizing fame so much that it is allowing everybody to experience that thing that Jim Carrey was talking about.

And part of me is like, I don't know, maybe we'll see like a mass disillusionment to fame and we'll see like, since everybody will get their 15 minutes of fame, everyone will learn that it's actually not that great. But I think if anything, it's getting people addicted to it. Like, and it's making it more...

It's like tangible. It's like just out of reach. Yeah, because it used to be like, oh, I would have to bust my ass to be famous. And now it's like so tangible that people get it for a little bit and they don't get to experience it maybe on the level that Jim Carrey did. So it's like such a small like context of what that means.

That they're like, oh my god, if this is what the little bit tastes like, I want to know what the big part of it tastes like. But yeah, I guess I do get that though. But I'm just very pessimistic and I'm like, look at all the fucking influencers we've seen that just like... Yeah. No, but

No, but there is some good to it because like, I guess the one up about influencers is because they're so like humanoid to the public eye, like versus celebrities. They're very like this ethereal thing that you can't touch. They feel so out of this world. And with influencers, there's a lot of cons to this, but the pros of it is with influencers, they're held at such a human standard that they really get like,

you really just start to see that like, oh, these are people making like a lot of mistakes, which the con of it is then it like fuels this idea that like, you're not allowed to make mistakes. Yeah, you're not allowed to make mistakes. And like, but I guess it is like a little humanizing to the idea of like what it is to be a celebrity. But there's still that weird divide. Yeah, that I'm going to shut up because I should like go on about this forever. We should blow up the TikTok servers.

I was going to say we should blow up the letterbox servers. We should get all the cinephiles into one theater to go watch Blue Valentine or some shit. Like some really sad shit that they're like, this is the epitome of late. This is the fuck. I always fuck up that word. Epitome. What is epitome? Like that's not a word. I made that shit up. I think that's how it looks like it would be pronounced. It's like epitome. No way. Epitome. Epitaph. Oh, okay.

No, it's literally because that's how it looks like. It's what do we pronounce? The epitome of fucking sadness. I'm trying to think of a cinephile like, this is a classic. There is no beating this. Every time I watch this movie, it's so good. What, like Taxi Driver? Phantom Thread. Oh, yeah. Wall Street. Nah, Fight Club, they'd be like, really? We're still talking about Fight Club? A real one is Castle Blanca. Okay.

I've never seen Casablanca. Isn't that that olden-ass movie in black and white? The Artist is a really good black and white movie. Have y'all seen that? And it's a silent film. Who would have thought? Um...

I forgot what I was saying. Oh, yeah. We should get them all in there and then blow up the Letterboxd headquarters while they're in the movie. So all of them get out their phone at the end to go leave a review and it's not loading. And then we watch them all freak out. And then what's that explosive you were talking about? Tannerite. We blow it up, but not like to hurt them, but just like...

So they all get really scared. And then they never watch another movie again. Yeah. And we can all just go on and enjoy every movie we watch. And it doesn't have to be this weird... I don't know. We've set up these... Never mind. Never mind. There's all the rules. The rules to cinema. Why can't I enjoy Marvel and then also enjoy...

Good movies. Like, why does it have to be one or the other? Why can't I like Spider-Man No Way Home and then enjoy Chunking Express? Exactly. Why can't I watch both of those in a row and be like, this was the best night of my life? This is... I've said it before, I'll say it again. Anytime I watch a movie, it immediately becomes my most favorite movie I've ever watched. Immediately. I've been catching up on all the fucking classic 90s movies and I'm like, why? Why are y'all so weird? Why?

90s was full of fucking monsters. But they're all such good movies, so whatever. I can't fight the truth. With that being said, let's get into media. First, it'll piss you off. What is it? Something. First, it'll piss you off. Then I'll set you free. It's probably the other way around. What is it? God damn it. But first, it'll piss you off. It'll set you free. But first, it'll piss you off.

Literally me when I watch all the movies that are popping on. The truth will set you free, but first it'll piss you off. My media of the week. Dude, I got into another conversation about he who shall not be named. Surrender. What the fuck? By suicide. What?

Wandering Star by Portishead and So Far Away by Charli XCX. I've been on a binge of Charli XCX and Sky Forever and Lana. Charli... Did you listen to like pop tune stuff or her OG stuff? No, I'm listening to like... What's it called? My... Something Romance.

Oh, True Romance. I was thinking My Chemical Romance. True Romance, such a good fucking album. Literally undefeated. Like, that album, no matter what year I listened to it, like, it is so fucking good. Sky Ferreira, Nighttime My Time. Yasss. Like, come on. Tatted up. Tatted on your body. Get into it. It literally is. Like, it... I actually need to get a couple of tattoos removed, but that's another conversation.

Okay, mine is Latin-esque. Actually, I think I've said that one. It's okay. Scratch that. There's no people. Between the Bars, it's a cover of Between the Bars by Chris Garnier. I surrender. Then we got You Are by Lionel Richie. Hey Rich Boy by The Millionaires. What the fuck? Yep.

I just got a bunch. And then since I watched Magnolia, One by Amy Mann. What's that? That's what I played. One is the loneliest number. My movie recommendation, Happy Together. Curious. Haven't seen that one. It's another one car away movie. It's really good. Oh, wait. Let me see the cover. It's about the two guys. Oh, no. I haven't seen that one.

We're like dating and stuff. Okay, I watched Magnolia. Good, watch it. It's probably Paul Thomas Anderson's magnum opus. And then I watched the most disturbed movie I have ever seen in my entire life. Oh, okay. I was going to say more disturbed and I was literally going to mention that one. Yeah. The Skin I Live In.

Be forewarned. It's really fucking gnarly. It's gnarly as shit. There's a lot of movies that I watch that I'm like, this was a good movie, but it's really gnarly. But I don't recommend them on the podcast because I don't want to start up too much conversation. But if you guys want...

good good uh plot and story and screenplay and good writing the skin i live in is a classic but be forewarned like there is some very gnarly and like it could be triggering yeah yeah dark um tones in it but that director has like re like a crazy yeah if it's pedro what's his name yeah uh i don't know how to say i

Pedro Almodovar. I really want to watch a bunch of his movies. We should watch one tonight. Yeah, that's the one that we saw at the Academy Museum. Yeah. I really want to watch. I want to watch the one when he shrinks down and becomes a little person and goes into that girl's vagina. That one looks good. That one. What is that one called? I can't think of it.

Oh, I think that one's time me up, time me down. But I don't remember. All right. No, that's not that. Oh, fuck. I can't think of the name. All right. Well, that was this episode. Thank you for listening. Peace and love. I put on a new bracelet that I just found. It says Green Friday.

Oh, wow. Yeah, I just found it. I went through all my shit recently, all my drawers and my Heidi spots that I put all my sentimental stuff, and it was really great. It was awesome. I found so many little things that I'd forgotten entirely about. I found a Phillips Hue light just hidden away. Oh, where are you going to put it? I think I'm going to put it behind my desk and have it. It's one of those ones that shoot up at the sky. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm going to put it behind my desk, I think.

Or maybe in the plant corner. But yeah, I recommend go through your little things, your pile of little things that you haven't seen or touched in years and you will be super happy you did it. All right. Well, thank you guys so much for listening. See you next sleigh.