Enya's Year Of Rest And Relaxation
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Welcome to this episode of Emergency Intercom. Oh, hey. No, you left your voice in your room. Go get your fucking voice. Well, you just did, so. You left your voice in your room. Go get it now. Go get it before we go. No. Should I just pick up what we were talking about? We were talking about being depressed.

And I was like, damn, I can't believe I've actually had my year of rest and relaxation. I also didn't even like think about it like that until you said that when you were like, you have fully had that. Yeah. And then I was like, oh, yeah, I literally did. Because I read books. I want to set the record straight. I read books and I read them fast.

And we'll insert a little clip of me reading my year finishing my year of rest and relaxation in Japan because I was also in Japan and you know I took a day to myself to just read books because I'm an intelligent being and I want to further my knowledge. Why are you as a man reading a book for girls? I think you know the answer to that. Because you're open-minded and loving. Because I'm a feminist. But

I think that's also why it was hard for me to finish that book because I started that book and it genuinely made me feel crazy. There was one other book that Orion had recommended to me, which of course the books Orion is recommending to me make me feel batshit fucking crazy.

But there was like another book that she had given me and I couldn't finish it. I remember starting it in New York and I was with a friend and I was like, I actually have to put this down because it is like fueling something in my brain that I'm like, I miss being like this. And that's bad. And then that's how I felt with my year of rest and relaxation because that's literally what I was doing. Not as gnarly because I was fully just abusing like melatonin.

instead, which that's another crazy arc to think about. And that's also like, we kind of lightly mentioned kratom like that, like two weeks ago. But melatonin is another thing that I think it's like way too normalized how like much it's pushed on young people. People take way too much melatonin one, you're not supposed to exceed five milligrams, the more you take, the less it affects you. And then on top of that, if you take it for long enough, it fucks up your sleep cycle. So like,

after you get off of it and you're like oh I think I can sleep without it you can't sleep without it because your body stops producing natural melatonin I think they make like baby melatonin yeah no they make it for fucking babies which is actually so fucked up but um I used to use the fuck out of melatonin which was like a really gnarly like

Because I was going up to like, this is naughty, naughty, naughty. Do not do this. But it was like having such a little effect on me. I was going up to like 80 milligrams of like melatonin intake. That is so psycho. Like I literally was taking so many because I would take a bunch. That is at that point. And it literally wouldn't work and I would just keep going.

At that point, that is my year of rest and relaxation because she took a bunch of melatonin. She would be like, I took melatonin and obviously a bunch of other like drugs. Yeah, but I would just like do that because I couldn't sleep, but I was so depressed and I just wanted to go to sleep and I hated being up. And then like that started kind of in Miami. And then when I moved, it got like exponentially worse for the next year and a half, like 2018 to like mid 2019. Yeah.

And I would literally just... What do you think caused it? So this really funny thing happened to me. Like, not only did I move and I was like in... I was just in love. And this person, I kind of knew, like, something happened to them. Like, but I don't... Like, you know. Yeah. We've been to the same kind of parties. Yeah. We celebrated. But on top of that, I was also just like a, like...

dreadfully depressed teenager. Like, I think for as long as you knew me... It was so violent. Like, I was always, like, dude, up until, like, I think even the age of 21, that's when, like, this, like, kind of layer of my body shed. And I'm, like, now, like, I still have my...

my downs but like not nearly as much as when i was younger dude it was like so i i like can't believe why are you are you giving me a sexy look while i talk about being really depressed uh like to make me feel better i just find it so hot i can fix you um but what the fuck was i saying that's a knee slapper

But when I got to L.A., it got really bad because I didn't have to fake in front of my parents anymore. Because in Miami, my parents would get on my ass and be like, oh, my fucking God, bitch. Depression isn't real. Like, who gives a fuck? Like, get up and go do something. And I'd be like, fine. So I would have to fake it. And then that's also what started my, like, gnarly melatonin use. Because I was like, dude, I can't balance staying up all night. I need to, like, medicate myself to sleep. Whatever. Became this whole thing. And then when I got to L.A. and it was really bad, here was my schedule.

I would wake up at the beautiful time of anywhere from 4 to 6 p.m. And my favorite coffee shop closed at 7 and was like a five-minute drive from our apartment. So I would wake up, lay around for as much time as I had before. And also, this is so evil, but I had a time because they turned off their espresso machines 30 minutes before closing. So if I woke up at 4...

I could just lay in bed for another hour and a half. If Inya missed this coffee, it would be gnarly. It was gnarly. It was so dangerous and violent. I know. It was so bad. And I didn't have an espresso machine or, like, a little cafetera because I was just, like, a piece of shit. And I was like, I don't want to do anything. I just want to, like, get it and, like, not have to work for it. I just want everything. Mm-hmm.

That I need to sustain like partial life and like kill it there. What's also crazy is like all I was doing was sleeping and being mad depressed. But like I still made time for that coffee. Like don't talk. I still was like don't talk to me before my coffee. Don't talk to me before Inya has her coffee. What's crazy is how many days of like life hanging out with y'all I miss also. I was just thinking about that. Like because I would wake up at like a good time. Yeah. You've always been like.

like a pretty early riser and then you wouldn't be up until fucking six you were like you had just fallen asleep yeah by the time i was getting up so i would like wake up and just be so fucking bored all day long until you got up and i had my like two hours with you before you locked yourself in your room your two hours with me were dreadful because i was just so fucking upset i think i was still i wasn't the worst to be around but like it was hard to be around me because like

- I was so obviously messed up. - It was like anything we said could be turned into a conversation about how depressed you are. Or not even like how depressed you are, but just how, 'cause I don't even think you labeled it as that then until later. But like early on you were just like, "I don't know what's going on."

Yeah. Earlier, I was just like, I don't know why I feel like this and I don't want to be here. And I won't say what I was saying, but my thing I said like 18 times a day. Also like just scary because where I was mentally, like it wasn't like a fun thing to hear because it was like so real that I was like not doing good. So I literally was just. It was, I remember it was actually so fucking scary hearing you say that shit. Cause I was like, she fucking means that. Like she literally means that. Um,

And so, yeah, I would wake up and then I would order an egg sandwich from Earth Cafe, which was like that like fluffy like Italian bread. And it would just be scrambled eggs, mayonnaise, spinach, and tomatoes. We need to bring back Earth Cafe. Yeah, because Earth Cafe like is...

- Earth Cafe is awesome because it is literally like NPC food. Although they're Mediterranean plate, that shit rips. That shit is good. But for the most part, eating there is literally what it might feel to be a Sims character and you're like, "I'm hungry." And then someone just fills up your bar. That's what eating at Earth Cafe tastes like. - It's just sustenance. - But yeah, so I would get an egg sandwich from Earth Cafe and then I would go right back into my room

And rot there for another five to six hours, like watching YouTube videos and God knows what else, just sitting in my fucking room and doing nothing until like 7 a.m. Or like sometimes I would just like pop some melatonin, be like, I don't want to be up anymore. And then I would go back to sleep and then wake up. And I did that every day, like without fail.

I did that every day for like way too long. It was crazy. I also do think like living in that dark ass apartment didn't help. That fucking building sucked balls. Like our windows, we were like, oh my God, we have such beautiful big windows. But they were like the bubble and gas inside had expanded and it made them like super fucking foggy and you couldn't see out of them and it wouldn't let sunlight in. So it was just dark and dingy all the fucking time. And then the room or the window in my room was,

Actually, I don't think ever got sunlight. Like if we wanted sunlight. Your room was so dark. It was so bad. And then that's why I like loved coming to this house because my window, I mean, my room is the brightest room I think ever invented and created. Like it's borderline a glass house.

And I don't put my blinds down ever. I don't have curtains because I think curtains and blinds are evil. And you should rise with the sun and be the naked neighbor and let them all see you naked. Also, what helps is like, I don't want to give the layout of our whole house away. But since your windows already know from YouTube, since your windows aren't like

towards the street like it doesn't really matter but like I think about that all the time I'm like if like I've like been outside but you're also a girl and men are fucking terrifying I know so I'm just like literally like petrified also like recently when I'm high in my room I swear someone's looking in my windows like it got so bad girl they're not in your windows they're in your walls you're schizophrenic the bugs are under your skin right now you need to claw them out I always swear someone's in my fucking like no last night

Or two nights ago, I genuinely thought someone got into the house. Like, something I was, like, I was... This is the annoying part about having, like, really good intuition is that when I'm high, I'm like, my intuition is always right. I know this is happening. Also, last night, I was messaging someone on Facebook Market about, like, the chairs we want. Yeah. And he was like, oh, I do, like, delivery, like, via DoorDash. Where do you stay? And I, like, told him the area we stay in. Not, like, our address, but, like, the...

the name of the area and he goes oh I'm there too I could easily get there get them there or something like that and last night at 1am also what the fuck is this setup on Facebook market I've never used it on my laptop but when you get a message it like rings every like two minutes it like will pop back up on the screen and ring and like I'm like I don't know if he's poking me or like what the I don't

fucking Facebook works. Facebook pokes. Oh my god. Do they still have pokes on Facebook? I don't know because I never used Facebook. What the fuck was that feature? What was that feature? It's like, hey, I'm here. It's like, I'm too nervous. I don't know what to say. Hopefully, if I poke you, you'll say hi to me. Oh, so it's like a tap on Grindr. Yeah. Oh, what? Yeah.

It's like you're beautiful. I'm gonna tap you. No taps. Don't fucking tap me. Message me. Don't message me some bullshit. Are those like some bios or like don't tap? Yeah, exactly. That's funny. Mask for masks. Don't tap.

um but yeah i was like really convinced that he was gonna like that somehow he got my address um from my facebook account and that like he was hacking me and like gonna pull up to my room yesterday and i was really scared yeah he got your address i mean he probably i was so scared i turned off my laptop and

went to sleep like that's how scared i was the thing is is he probably key logged your laptop and got your address and all your information and he's probably just been like casing out the joint recently and the person you heard inside the house was probably him finding out the layout of the house so he can get you oh so he could deliver the chairs and put them where they're supposed to go no so he can get you get me what oh get me the chairs yes

So just be careful. Yeah, I like have been thinking somebody's after me. Inya's such a psycho. Like I literally, yesterday I had such like a, like I had like a, or maybe it was two days ago. I had like a full body like, I was like, like,

Something changed inside of me because this used to piss me off and I've shifted my mind frame on it and I used to think it was like an insult to my intelligence and an insult to like everything I am as a being but when you're like, did you lock the door? Like, can you make sure you lock the door? I'm like, yes, I fucking locked the door. It was locked 0.5 seconds ago and it used to piss me off but something changed in me and now I'm just a good person and I recognize that my friend is a fucking freakazoid. I know, you didn't realize I was actually crazy and I like,

Again, we've talked about this, but it is like debilitating how I think doors don't lock when I lock them or anybody locks them. But like it's definitely part of my brain that it's like if you want to do it, if it's going to get done and you want it right, you got to do it yourself. And like the part of my brain that like feeds into like

- That you're smarter and have a bigger ego than everybody. - No, the part that nobody understands that doors don't lock. No one else in this room knows that when you lock a door and turn around, you have to check it 20 times. I'm the only one who knows that information in this room. - It's real, it's real.

I'm sure a lot of y'all have noticed we don't have many ads anymore and you're probably thinking, wow, oh my God, I feel so bad for them. They deserve ads. But we're doing our job. You're not doing your job. You need to fucking subscribe and engage with me or I will never do my job again. I like, I can't believe I miss reading ads. I like, I miss the taste.

But yeah, and then also I do this thing where like I'll check if the front door is like bolted and locked and like we literally have like an insane lock system. We have like 14 locks on our front door and we didn't even like, we moved in and it had locks all over the front door and there was a lock, there is a lock on the outside of my bedroom door so that whoever was in there, probably a demonic spirit, there were blood handprints on the door

inside of the closet you remember seeing them there was something fucked up going on in that bedroom and honestly i think me having such a bright and light spirit moving in there made the spirits or demons or whatever move out um and i'm just such a good person that i was able to do that but yeah who the fuck lock what are you locking in that room from the outside your child yeah but there's a balcony door

that doesn't lock from the outside. -It had the landlord special when we first moved in where it was sealed shut from the paint. -Yes.

um but yeah um sometimes at night i go to lock the door and i think somebody's already inside behind me like even though i just locked it like that's how deep it goes like i'll go to like lock the doors again and it's like mega bolted like literally a human being would have to break through the door itself to get inside and even though it's like that i turn my back and i am convinced somebody is inside right behind me and i have to run to my room damn yeah well i've been watching this new show that like

I'm like, why is no one fucking talking about this? Because it's actually so sick. But has anybody seen Squid Game? You mean one of the biggest shows that ever aired on Netflix? Yeah, like Squid Game. It's this small little thing that I've been checking out recently. And then I stumbled upon another show called...

strangest thing. No, no, it's stranger things and you know someone in the show. So I don't know what like... The craziest thing is there's a song in it called Running Up That Hill by Lauryn Hill that became the biggest song ever made and she made it for this show. So like you know a lot but you know so little. So like what's happening? Because you know these shows and things exist but like your information... I don't know. I just don't know what you're talking about because like I wouldn't know if I knew it. You know what I'm saying? Yeah.

The strangest thing. The strangest thing about it all. Someone said that. Never mind. Who was that? I don't know. No, no. There was someone that like, we like a random fucking person. Maybe it was like an Uber driver or something. Said that, oh, we were in the hotel in Miami in the lobby. And someone was like, damn, that's just the strangest thing is Finn walked out.

And I was like, oh my fucking God, that is so sick. You know what's funny is they probably didn't even correlate that they were making that joke. Like they literally were just like, that is like, cause that was a random ass fucking hotel for y'all to be in. Like I placed them in a hotel in like Havana, California.

Little Havana, which is a lit ass area. But for tourists, is it like the most popping? Ooh, na-na. Because that's like the one hotel in that area. That hotel was fucking insane because it was smaller than our podcast set and it slept four people apparently. And it was the messiest. Like we were walking on three inches of debris every night to get to our fucking bed. Dude, it smelled so bad in my room. It was disgusting. You know what it is?

I thought those rooms were bigger, but all the king and queen rooms are really nice there. I don't know why they even have those quad ones. But also, if you want to let me stay for free and I can review it and give a good review and lie. It was a nice hotel. No, it is a nice... Any hotel that uses the Labo or ASAP, I'm like, yeah, I'm in. Yeah, it was a nice-ass hotel, but I think what it is is that's a kid's room that you get and you put your kids in there and then you're across the hall so you can have sex with your...

that fully is a or it's for the friend groups who go to miami and come back and nobody's friends anymore yeah what's up with that i've been thinking about that i've been thinking about that actually yeah because miami changes people miami brings out demons and people that they didn't previously know about you can just be hedonistic and nice and evil right not me though never mean not our friend group though right so was that good or just like whatever

Is that good or just whatever? Like, is that a good price or whatever? Like, whatever the fuck price. It's just like, whatever. It's good. We've recorded four days in a row and I have nothing else to say. Yeah. I think people who say that they like enjoy tea, like drinking tea are fucking lying. Like you are fucking lying. No, but like it's tea. That's like tea, sis. Like I love drinking tea. Like Herman the Frog drinking his tea. Like the tea. Oh, I'm going to sip my tea emoji. Yeah.

The Kermit the Frog. Wait, is there like a video of like the puppet Kermit drinking tea and that's where that started? Like why did like the frog emoji and the tea emoji become like a joint unit? I don't know. But that era of Twitter where Kermit the Frog was like the reaction meme to everything is actually so embarrassing to look back on.

and like i was a part of it oh it's because he was in a lipton tea commercial so yeah the whole thing let me sip my tea and then like i can't i literally can't jim henson literally was like freaking the fuck out in the afterlife when this was happening his goddamn grave do you remember the dark cloaked um dude yes i feel like that's still like a thing i don't know

Oh, my God. Yeah, Kermit the Crab era. Why can't I fucking say Kermit the Frog? Yeah. I don't even remember, like, the punchline set up to that one, but. It's like me talking to my evil self. Me, he's a fluffy dog. Me to me, steal him. 22,000 retweets. Save all that stuff. Oh, my God. I tweeted this. It's at Anya. Oh, my God. Our landlord calls me Phillip and in your arm. On.

She called you arm. I know. A-R-M. Arm. Like Justin Bieber. She'll just like give us like

nicknames and like not call us but and then she like comes to the front door and she's like hi drew like hi drew but on the phone she's like philip and then i literally heard her call you fucking arm i don't think you're hearing me she called you arm and your name is india like it's insane i because she she usually calls me on like she'll just call me on and then i'm like

I'm like, okay, I understand that like not everybody can say my name, but on is like, that's a first, but it's literally, I think it's because she's too lazy to get it all out. Like she's just like, and I think for you, she's literally, I know she's awesome because she's just like,

I don't know. She's like so classic. Like she's just an older woman takes care of herself and like dresses up for like shit. And she loves, she loves, I think she was nervous about like having kids move into her place. And then she like every once in a while just come by for like a maintenance and shit. Also, the other thing is she just lets herself in. I know, she just comes into that. Which I don't think is legal, but I find it endearing because she is like mother. Like she's like. Yeah, I don't mind because she's like a sweet, like old.

older woman. So I'm like, you do you. Yeah, but we have our beef because she's a landlord, but like, whatever. She's awesome. She also is awesome because when Azul went missing, I think she kind of felt guilty for it because what happened was when the painters were in the house cleaning, she kept going in and out and leaving the doors open along with the

painters um and then nizul got out during that um and she saw me freak the fuck out and be like oh my fucking god my cat's gone um and now every time she comes in or when people are working on the house she's always like close the door close the door close the door close the door they have a cat in here close the door and like she's really on it and like we'll go like when they were redoing the whole like complex she like kept going to the guys to come in and like look around to fix things she was like close the door behind you and then like for any balcony she would tell them like

You have to ask her when you could come because she has a cat. Tell her. We need guests on this podcast so fucking bad. We're talking about our landlord right now. Like, what are we talking about? What are we doing? What is going on? Well...

I thought it was awesome. I think it's awesome too, but I'm just like, I took myself out of it and put myself in their shoes and hearing someone talk about their landlord. Bro, everybody has a landlord and knows about Kermit the Frog sipping tea though. Relatable. I actually don't give a fuck at this point and I don't care who hears this, but I think we should talk about the Jaden Smith hangout stories because I was thinking about them the other day and I was like,

That was insane. Like that era was fucking insane. It was like peak Jaden Smith being like, I don't even know what you would call him. Everybody being obsessed with him. Yeah, everybody being obsessed with him and like him just saying the most like cryptic shit online and like people eating it up and being like, what the fuck does he mean by that? And literally being one of the most famous people in the world. And one day we were kind of just like,

hanging out. I don't know. It was just like in a big group setting and he was there. And we were at a friend's house. Yeah. Showing him their music. Yeah. And we just so happened to be there. So we like met him. Yeah. And also what's his name was with him. Moises. Moises Arias was with him and had a giant which I thought was really wholesome endearing and cute and had a giant Louis Vuitton duffel bag with him with like a

God knows what it was like the biggest bag I've ever seen in my life. But anyways, we like go upstairs. We're hanging out for a little bit. He is literally sitting in the window like fucking Batman, like perched up, just like silhouetted by the moonlight. Yeah, Jaden is like silhouetted by the moonlight. And he's just like saying the craziest shit I think I've ever heard anybody ever say in my life. And he was just talking about like not to air too much of his business out, but like he was talking about the schools he went to and like

what they did at those schools and I was like, yeah, and I was like, oh, this is some like, actually like demonic LA shit, like whatever, like this is crazy. Granted, I had just moved here and I'm from shit ass nowhere, Texas. And I was completely culture shocked by someone going to a school that wasn't that learns magic. Like you're learning magic at the school. Like that makes no sense. His school was like super based in like,

It was literally the school of magic like he was telling me that they would like do magic under the stairs. This is also when he was a fucking kid like literally- We have to preface we don't know this person like we've met him maybe twice and like I guarantee he doesn't even remember my face but- Yeah. So he just kept going- Oh especially your face because it's like so forgettable and indistinguishable. Oh wow. Wow bitch. Wow.

But anyways, he was sitting and just like telling, he like commanded the room obviously because he's fucking Jaden Smith and everybody was like, you're Jaden Smith, you're Karate Kid. Like, this is crazy. We will listen. Yeah, we're going to listen to this. And he was sitting there and then he started going on about this giant like amulet sitting on his fucking chest. And it was like a necklace. It was like the biggest thing I've ever seen anybody have on like their body. Yeah.

And he was just explaining it was like it's a quartz crystal wrapped in copper. And he was saying that this is like a GPS locator for satellites in space that like if he ever gets lost, they can beam down and like find him from this GPS locator.

sitting on his chest. And it was like, but it wasn't like... It's like an iPhone. Yeah, it was like... No, he literally, he made that comment. He was like, what nobody realizes is we've always had iPhones. Humans have always had iPhones. I mean, he's not wrong. Like, he isn't wrong because like there are...

for every generation they've had something that they were like this is like the like most like interconnected like piece of technology we have at the moment like this is what keeps us connected and he was like if you go all the way back something as simple as like a rock with like like something written on it was someone's iphone that was their everything that was like what kept their information so he was actually spitting fucking bars but at the time i was like that's pretty freshly 18

And he had been talking for two hours. And I was like, what the fuck is he talking about? And why are we listening? I'm so scared. I was like, this is LA. And Moises kept asking what was in my backpack. Because he had a big backpack. They were bonding over their backpack. He just kept asking me, what's in your backpack? And I was like, nothing. He just wanted to be able to show what was inside his. Because he was proud of his cameras. He was freaking me the fuck out. Because we also, when we listened to him. Wait, but let me, before we move on from the crystal around his neck.

Just if you zoom in on the motherboard of an iPhone, it is made of, like, crystal and copper and shit. So, like, he's kind of right. But, yes. I didn't mean to say that. But...

Like, he just kept asking what was in my backpack. Also, I don't know why we're being like our friends. Like, we had gone to fucking Brockhampton's house. Yeah. Because Ian was like, oh, come listen to the album. And we were like, okay, yes. Yeah, we're the biggest stans ever right now. It was like saturation two. It was literally like, I was like, this is what being in LA is about. This is fucking like...

lit and we went to their house and we were like cool we're just gonna sit here and listen to the album and then they're all like he's here and we're like who's here and then they're like jayden smith is here he pulls up in a fucking giant gmc and everybody goes outside to greet him except we stayed in the

room i think with matt because we were all like i'm like too scared to go out there and like i i didn't like this wasn't where i thought my night it was literally like he's here he like he's here it was like it was ominous almost and like they like went out and like got him and whatever and then we ended up in like role mills room at the time it was like the studio yeah so it was like this small room and like the whole band wasn't in there it was literally like

I think like Matt, Ian, Merlin, Romil, Jane and Smith, Moises, and then us. And then me and you. And then us. Oh, I love this part. This is my favorite part of the story. It was in a dark room because they turned up. Like the darkest room. They turned

It was the darkest room I've ever been in. I don't know what the vibe was. But I was just hyped because I was like, I get to listen to this album. But obviously, I'm like an 18-year-old who's like now like from Miami, like sitting in front, like kind of interacting with, I think that was like the first like famous person I had really interacted with. So I was just like sitting there dead silent and not being able to enjoy myself all the way because I felt like I was being perceived by this like new human I was interacting with who I knew is like,

one of the most he was he's like fucking jaden smith so we were just like sitting there listening to this album and then we're like okay we're like all getting comfortable and we're like this is okay like it's not that deep the room is dark we can enjoy ourselves and like freak the fuck out that we're listening to this awesome album for the first time and then all of a sudden you just hear like like a like like a flash like you know like really big flashes how you can hear them winding up from electricity

And it literally, it genuinely blinded us. Like, I was disoriented. Like, it was a Call of Duty flashbang. Like, you throw a flashbang in a room. It's like... And, like, you're, like, your ears are ringing and you're, like, trying to, like, get into this album. And also, like, at the end of the day...

But Moises Arias is flashbanging you. It's literally like this small kind of foggy room because like someone had smoked in it or something. Like, I don't know why there was smoke in it. Like, it felt like it was a foggy room. And it was just Moises going around like to everyone to get their reactions. It was like...

I want those photos so bad. I want those photos. It's literally a Men in Black device. Yes. It was wiping our memory from the album so we couldn't leak it. It was literally insane. It was so insane. Like, literally, like, and then it's just, like, like, also just so over-simulating because it's, like, saturation era, just, like, like, like, it's just so... I would argue that

would argue that saturation 2 is my favorite album but like of the three but it was just so much dude it was literally fucking insane and me and drew like we thought that's when we thought it was over we were like okay now jason smith's gonna leave but no but then we all got brought up to the seminar in the

big room upstairs and then he spoke to us for like two hours and I mean like yeah like the iPhone thing like he said about just stuff that if now I heard like a young James Smith saying that I'd be like this kid is way too intelligent for his time like he like he has too much to think about

But at the time I was so greened out. I was like, what the fuck is this? And then Moises is like grabbing at my fucking purple bag, which also was like, why did that purple bag give me so much attention from like random men when I was like, I know it's because you had the pussy wagon. Um,

But I was given that by somebody. Yeah, it was hanging off that bag and people were like, oh, damn. She knows shit. She's so different. Yeah, she knows. But yeah, he was like, what's in your bag? And I was like, I don't know. She knows Beyonce and Lady Gaga telephone. She knows. I was like, I don't know. Garbage. And he was like, let me see. And I was like, get away. Like, I wasn't.

I wasn't saying get away, but I was really like, dude, you're so high and you're freaking me out. And I watched you a lot as a kid and now you're like really proud to get right back. He is the most interesting human I've ever seen like interact in rooms. Yeah. I like, I really want to like have. I wish we had like one-to-one conversations with them because like it was mainly them talking to us, but like,

I wish I was able to just like inquire a little bit and just dig a little deeper, especially into Moises' areas. Also, his boxed water shit was actually so advanced and really sick. Does he own boxed water?

Is it just water? I think he owns boxed water. Not boxed water. I think it's the blue one. Oh, yeah, the blue one. It's not boxed water. But still, like his water company was really advanced and he was like doing shit in like Flint, Michigan when still no one has ever done shit for it. And he was just out there giving out free water, which is so fucking sick. But yeah, his his whole mission with that. I was like, damn, that's really cool. Is it still a thing?

Just water? Yeah. Yeah, I have it. The coffee shop I like in Miami carries it. So yeah, I put a few dollars in Jaden's pocket because I just like still fuck with him. Yeah, he's just a boy. Like buy your friend's stuff and their products and their services. Don't ask for it for free. Yeah, like that's what we do with our friend Jaden. I wish we could...

I would love to have another conversation with him. But yeah, that was like the most insane thing. We could easily worm our way into a room with him somehow. Yeah. We're like fucking parasites. But he would be like, who are these freaks? Like, I don't remember them. Or maybe he does. Who knows? But yeah, that was like the most insane thing I'd ever witnessed. Because I was like, I'm literally watching James Smith like go on a tangent that I...

Honestly, didn't have the intelligence to keep up with. And I was so... That was like my most overstimulated night like I had ever had in my life. Especially after being flashbanged. The iPhone thing is really interesting. Yeah.

- It literally is such a good take. Like it's true. Like we have always like-- - Like humans crowding around a fire. - Yeah. - Looking at the fires tell stories. - Everyone looking at TikTok on the couch. Like it's the same thing. - It goes back. He was literally on his shit. - The inherent and incessant need, the inherent incessant, not primal, but

what's it called? Royal blooded need to have entertainment while I feast. And that's what I do. I eat and I can't eat until I watch television. And that's from my royal blood. - That's what you think? - My colonial blood.

Colonism is here to separate us. You didn't even say it right. Colonism. You're the worst colonizer. Colonism? Colonism. It's like in the guts. It's in your colon. I'm in your guts. Drew appropriating colonizer culture right now and failing at it. I know. You like don't even know shit about it. You don't know shit about it. Well, I just bought like 36 houses in Japan in a really run down neighborhood so I could rent them out. Like I'm

doing what I was put here to do. What you were put here to do. Everybody who is a landlord, you could trace them back to evil. Yeah. Except our landlord. Except for... I mean, but even still, she has her moments where she's mean as fuck. She's a bit evil. Yeah, but like, you can't stand a landlord fully. But just don't say anything to me when I am a landlord.

It's in my cards. I'm going to be real. Actually, I could never do that to someone. I have to clarify. I could never do that to anybody. Oh my. There's just so much fucking piss.

Oh, also, I want to say it, but the last time I saw Moises was at an arcade and he was going in on the boxing thing. Of course. It's literally, you know the video of me running up and hitting it? He literally saw us doing that and was like, that looks fucking fun. And that's why we need to hang out with him because he would fully get it. He gets it. He would be able to hang, I feel. Because he literally saw us running around and fucking hitting the shit out of it. And then when we all finished, he went and started like,

hella playing with it and he was there before us and nobody had touched that machine. Oh my god, I want him on the fucking podcast now. That's our first guest. Alright, listen everybody. People would be like, oh, but like, where is Orion and Josh? No, no, listen, listen, listen. Everybody, clip that last thing and say Drew and Inya on Jaden Smith. Blow it the fuck up.

So we can have a contact point of contact with Jaden Smith. Don't do that. But you could clip it if you want and post it, but don't feel the pressure to. You can't because I'm going to legally go after you and get it taken down. I'll just text my friend and be like, yo, link me with this person. Link me. Let's link. Link and build. Yeah, let's link and build. I want to get you at a table outside of Air One and pick your brain.

That's what I'm going to start saying to people. I want to go get some food at the hot bar and sit outside of Irwan and read your brain. This is my go-to. I just love the way you see the world. Like you just see it so... So how? So good. So differently. Your viewscape on the way we live is just so... I was trying to mimic that one guy that I was showing you on TikTok. That like the male gaze guy. Oh, yeah. Right.

we won't get into that when will we move past right right i don't think ever i think it's in our vocabulary forever right just like yas is in my vocabulary till the end till the day i die oh fuck i just said a kanye lyric i'm a texas guy till the day i die you didn't though now you did do you want to cut it or like cut it

You like are giving like your brain is fully fucking empty right now. It's just because I've spoken so much. What did that say? 45 minutes. Because I missed it. I love my little app. Wait, can I show them? So we don't like, so we have kind of like an idea.

of how long we've been recording for. There's no way you can see that. Kai has this little app that shows you. He'll hold it up and he'll hold it up for like three minutes and we're obviously looking at it and he's just holding it. Well, like that's the hard part is because like we want to be able to acknowledge that we've looked at it without being like, okay, cool, Kai, you can put your phone down. Dude, this hasn't been recording and I'm not fucking

Yeah, I can see that it has been a piece of shit. That gets me every single time without fail. I guess Kai because he somehow thinks it's going to be his fault and he gets like scared. Wait, but the way Red means recording. What the fuck are you doing? Have you ever seen the YouTube channel Red Reans Recording? No, but I like actually can't wait to play Fortnite. OPN.

What was that? What? What was Red Bean's recording? It's a current YouTube channel. That, like, unlocked something in my brain. Wasn't that, like... It's a current music YouTube channel. The key of awesome. The key of awesome. Is that not, like, a really old YouTube channel? It's probably, like, seven years old, but he still posts today, and his content still fucking eats. Is that fucking up the audio? Like, you doing that? I think it's gonna sound good. It's gonna sound cool. Thank you. Oh, my gosh.

Oh, you're being a B word right now. You're not even going to say it because I love you. Dude, what is this episode? Like, what is happening?

There's going to be so much to be cut because we're just dead. I don't think so. I actually think it's a good one. To be honest, this is the best episode we've ever recorded. I was like, this is a really good one. You're a really good one in bed sometimes. But you just don't have a gauge of when you're good. Yeah, I don't have a gauge because I'm fucking straight, bitch. You would have a gauge. What? G-A-Y-G-E. Well, I'm a G-A-Y-M-E-R gamer. So let's talk about it.

You're like not though. I wouldn't consider either of us actually like to be gamers because playing Fortnite is like it's like what it used to mean when you only played like Call of Duty. Like I don't think if you only play Call of Duty and Fortnite you get to consider yourself a gamer. Well now I'm playing Yu-Gi-Oh on my Steam deck. I wouldn't consider that.

That's like playing solitaire. Like you're not serving. No, but there's more thought to it. It's like chess and the more you learn about it. Also, I was watching competitive. Playing chess does not make you a fucking gamer. It makes you a fucking nerd ass loser. Loser. You're a loser. I can't do anything. Do you see how I'm treated? I just have hobbies and I want to put a label on myself. This is why I can't label myself because people don't let me label myself. I'm labeling you for you. You're a fucking nerd, bitch.

bitch true also you have a victim complex and I have a giant cock like what's the fucking difference like I'm confused like I really don't know the difference victim complex giant penis like they're synonymous they are pretty synonymous

Well, the new Fortnite update is fucking lit. Also, I've been getting into Pokemon VCG, which is just competitive Pokemon. And it's fucking lit. It's fucking lit. Video game lit. You saw me watching it yesterday. I know. And I was into it. I was like on the couch, like lean forward watching because it's like nail biting. It's like sports.

I've also been watching so much basketball. I have to read this. This is like the funniest thing I've ever read in my life. And you didn't really have a reaction to it when I read it out loud. But I was like, this is like a banger. Like, damn. Well, I got two actually. I got two. You didn't have a reaction to what I sent you last night that literally made me crack the fuck up. I've been on a really crazy SNL like...

See, this is... Because I don't have other social medias, I've become the most generic human in terms of consumption. I'm literally watching SNL. Well, no, because... It's fair because Kiki Palmer tore and they're finally going with like green out humor because they saw Please Don't Destroy is like doing numbers online. So they were just like...

oh, this is what the younger generation wants to see. And like, who fucking cares about all the old dying freaks? Like, this is what we're going to start doing. And that is what all the cast members of SNL said, which is actually like kind of fucked up for them to say they don't give a fuck about their older like audience and they want them to die. Yeah. But they should. So we'll see if we'll see if they correct that. But yeah. Kiki Palmer. I think we did. We talked about that yesterday. No.

But she... But at this point when this goes up, it's going to be so old. Fucking destroyed. I know. She's so good. She's hilarious, dude. Like, this is her moment. Yeah. All of the skits she was in, I don't know if you've seen any of them, are so fucking funny. There was another one I watched last night that I hadn't seen that, like, was really fucking good. She's just been so good. But show the thing that made you crack up. I'm sorry.

The reason men can't satisfy y'all sexually no more is because y'all are overdoing it with these toys. Stop tasering your pussy every night. It's damaging the nerves and feelings. Yeah, and tasering. Stop wing-biting your- Tasering. Does it say tasering? Yeah. That's fucking awesome. No, like literally, I'm not kidding. Okay, I was going to say something crazy, but I'm not going to say that. But-

Once you go to like Wingbot, going back to analog is really difficult. Like it's just like it's unnecessary. It's like having a car and then being like, I'm going to take my bike eight miles today. It's like, no, but I'm hungry. And like I can get to the store in like three minutes. That analogy is so sick.

Do you think that it actually does desensitize stuff? Because I was talking to my friend about this and she was like, yeah, I use my vibrator and I'm a little bit concerned about being able to have normal sex. I don't think so because I still have enjoyable sex when it's not included in the picture. Yeah. I don't think so. But what I was going to say is I tapped into analog not that long ago. I was like, I still got it. I can still tap in.

I can still tap into analog when need be because okay they need to figure out how to make vibrators with an undying battery like I don't give a fuck if you have to put lead in there like anything so that I don't have to plug it in why do I have to plug it in that's so crazy like I don't care where you gotta put it there lithium to make yeah like give me a lithium battery give me something I can't put on an airplane and I'll just buy one for different locations respect respect um

This is also awesome. Hey, my sister is thinking about getting her nipples pierced. I know you're not photoshopped. So is she allowed to see yours? I'm for real just going to show her my phone. She won't let me see I just offered because I'm taking her and she's complaining about how all these models photos are fake as fuck. It doesn't matter. It doesn't affect me either way. So it's up to you. I don't care. I just told her I know some females who have them and I could try.

So this dude hit up a girl. Trying to get pictures of her tits. And on his Snapchat and was like using that as an example. That's so funny. I fucking love that. I used to want my nipples pierced so badly. It was the Finsta era. I know. I still kind of want it. Should we go get our nipples pierced and belly button pierced? I want my hairy, disgusting belly pierced so bad.

We should do it before we go to spring. Like literally now is the time to do it because the problem is every summer rolls around and I'm like, I wish my fucking belly button was pierced. But then the problem is you can't go in pools and like do all the fun stuff. And also the sweat makes it like more prone to infection. And that's my biggest fear with like piercings is getting an infection. So now would be the time because it's all cold and you're going to be bundled up. And you're not going to be all sweaty and nasty. Although like if you, I guess we would literally have to get it next week because it's,

yeah during its healing process will be in really cold places and i think wearing too tight of clothes is bad for it because it like will tug tug it i would be the bitch to get a fucking belly button piercing and rip my shirt off and it fucking rips through my or your fucking belly button falls off it turns into an audi and just shrivels off you know if you poke if um you're a guy and you poke your belly button you can feel it in your penis tip try it kai what what would you say your belly button really hard oh i think i'm

Oh, what the fuck? I know. Whoa. You try it. See if you feel it anywhere. Okay, we're literally sexually satisfying ourselves. We have to stop. I know. I'm like, I have to because I'm like digging in my fucking skirt. We have to stop. All right. Well. Oh, okay. I'm going to show you the clip and you're not going to think it's funny. Like, but I think I thought it was so funny because it's so bad.

This like joke that was on SNL. It literally made me crack up because this was like a, this was like a, like a Barney moment, but it was like so funny because he really believed in this joke. It's so stupid. - I'm just saying I stand by that joke.

immediately after like you know you wrote it and was like that's not the best i've ever done but for some reason it's so good like respect but i have one more little thing no i can't do that no okay you were the worst fucking you went okay okay yeah you can if you want but should i just start going into media oh i forgot we're doing media okay um well let's get into media

Was my like whisper really warm? Yeah. And I like felt it on my hand. I tried not to make it warm. Well, you made it warm. So little boxes on the hilltop. Little boxes made of ticky. Remember what you're fighting for. Little boxes on the hilltop and traffic and suburbia.

And a 95. Remember, that's what you're fighting for. What are you saying? It makes perfect sense to me. Little boxes on the hilltop. Okay, I'm going to give this album away. I've been listening to it for a very long time. It is Charles Stepney, Step on Step.

I really like that album has been just on rotation for the past few weeks. It's really good. It's really sweet. Just a good listen. And it's really long. So it's like an hour and 17 minutes. And that's what I've been listening to in the car. And then also this song just reminds me, I've already said it, but like it like reminds me of like looking out the train window in Japan and just being like, damn, life is so sweet. We were in Japan. When you like...

live it to love the people you love and learn to get what because you say we were in Japan and like I don't know it just made me think of everything in such a sweet way but can't get it out of my head by electric like orchestra I also just love the color because I have these but

I really have been wanting for so long a pair of glittery, like Dorothy, like super Dorothy ones, but I can only find costume ones ever. And then like Miu Miu makes like silver ones. Like, but I need like these, I need Rapetto. Rapetto, if you're listening, I need you to make these in glitter. And I know maybe you're worried because like they might not sell the shoes. They might not sell as well because like for somebody to own like glittery Dorothy shoes is a big statement.

But I will get a pair. So that's all that matters is if you sell one and I will buy them. Yeah. And I'll be happy. And you know what? To make it worth your while, I'll buy two. I'll buy one in this size and then one in a bigger size so that I could put thicker, longer socks. So now you have two sales on your hand. So think about that. Yeah. You have two sales on your hand if they go on sale. Right. Because they're way too expensive.

Okay, so my media is Bad Vibes by Palmistry and Blade and Isabelle Love's Story. That's a cool song. Also, wait, where the fuck is that at? Oh, no. Hold on. I've been listening to Trent Reznor and Anarchist Ross again and Sugarstorm is...

still a fantastic song it's actually my top song of 2022 sugar storm is and then it's a little lost by arthur russell hyper ballad by which is so funny because i like i guess a lot of your music i don't hear you play because you play in your room yeah and also when i'm back in texas yeah but yeah i discovered arthur russell crystal by afx twin and then the fifth is such great hi it's remastered by the postal service which i love that that's in my top five and i've been playing pokemon

And why is my voice doing that? I feel like I sound like I'm about to start crying. I'm not, I'm just so sad and emotional. - Oh my God, get over yourself. - It made it onto my top list of songs too. So that was both like... - Yeah, but mine was my number two.

That was not my number two. My number two was It's a Rap by Mariah Carey. My top five is like so funny. It's Waters of March by Art Garfunkel. It's a Rap by Mariah Carey. Healing by Todd Rundgren, which is really fucking annoying because two of those songs are in Worst Person in the Fucking World. So I watched that movie and was like, God, those songs are so good. And I listened to them so much.

I Would Die For You by Prince, which is no shocker because that was like my song. I would die for you. I need to make a new edit of the whole year footage. I'm surprised Wild Horse is listening. And Couldn't Love You More, John Martin. It was like, it's number seven. Because number six is Oh My Love.

Number seven, actually, is Mercury by Steve Lacey, then Fuck All Night by Jay-Z, and then Wild Horses by Prefab. I might post this. I might take out all of my really deep cuts because I'm a piece of shit and I don't want everybody to have what I listen to because I am a gatekeeping cunt. But I might like maybe make a little public playlist.

Nice. If you're fucking lucky, bitch. Motherfucker. So after Such Great Heights, it's Hotel Breakfast by Blade, It's Not Up To You by Bjork, True Love Will Find You in the End by Daniel Johnston, and Chroma Key Dreamcoat by Boards of Canada.

I think my top artist was Boards of Canada, which is fucking lit. You know what's so annoying is you mentioning that Daniel Johnson song just reminded me. I had Josh cracking the fuck up because I kept singing it wrong on purpose. On purpose?

All right. Bye, guys. What do you mean? Do you know what on person means? I have no idea what that means. One day when you say something to me, I'm just going to fucking deck you in the wiener. See, I love that. But I kept messing up the lyrics and be like, did you know that's actually what the word said? And he was for some reason that was making him so laugh. I was like, true love will never find you in the end. Like, did you know that's what he said? And then he just for some reason that was making him crack up. And I'm like, bro, you've never listened to the fucking song. True love will find you in the end.

All right. Bam. Thank you, guys. Don't give up until true love will find you in the end. This is a promise with a catch. Only if you're looking will it find you inside the light, the light. Dude, it honestly sounds so good. Thank you. True love will find you in the end.

You just laughed.