A peek behind the veil
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Welcome to this episode of Emergency Intercom. What's up? I suffered from a sickness this past week. We're literally recording this 12 hours before this episode goes up, which we have never done before. We're hoping it gets out on time. We're really hoping here.

I think we've done it. We've done it like 12 hours before, but it's like we actually wake up at 11 and do it and it's not like 12 when we're doing it. Yeah. But yeah, I've just been so sick and I don't feel real. So we had to keep pushing it back because also yesterday I was having an existential crisis and I didn't feel like I could sit on camera. Yeah.

Yep. Now I'm really concerned because I sound sick. Does it make sense? You have a nasally voice. Because I'm like, ugh, this is so annoying. I sound different. And my job is to be a voice to the people. And to sound pretty. Speak to the people. Do you want to tell us about your scary dream you had? Yeah, I was just about to bring it up. So...

I was gonna say it yesterday, so I like lost it, but I'm just gonna say it was yesterday. Whatever, whatever. It doesn't fucking matter. Jesus Christ. But I had... Oh my God. Why did you do that? I just got pissed because these bitches always got some shit to fucking say. They're not even... You can't even hear them. They're not even saying anything to you. They always got some shit to say. But...

I don't know how to fucking start this because I'm normally like, oh, my dream last night. My dream last night was fucking crazy. It was the most vivid dream I've ever had second to the one that I've told a thousand times on this goddamn podcast of me dying over and over again. This one also has to do with me dying again. And it was fucking crazy. Um,

Basically, I don't know how we got here, but I was sitting out front of a church or some religious structure. It was like a church steeple. And above it was like...

the most beautiful like celestial event I've ever seen in my entire life. There was like, you could see like every planet in the sky and you could see like the sun being like eclipsed by like a moon or another planet. And I was like, what the fuck? And there was like a beautiful, it was like a Renaissance painting. It was like the most beautiful outline of this celestial event happening above this church. And I was like, oh, I'm going to record this. And like, cause this is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. So I like took out my phone and started like recording it.

And almost immediately this like Eastern European dude, I don't know what he was like came by, but he, he wasn't speaking like English. Um, and he came by and like, I was recording and I like put my phone really down really fast because like,

I could like see his face and like for some reason like I've never been able to see someone's face like this in a dream and it like really caught me off guard and I was like like I like knew I was dreaming but like I don't know it was really really weird and I saw this dude's face and it was like really like detailed and I could I could like literally draw him right now it was like so scary and he had like really beady eyes and um

He was just like really fucking creepy. I just imagine what that drawing would look like if you tried to draw like surrealism like realism Yeah, and like you giving me the paper and it's like the ugliest drawing of a person I've ever seen. It's the worst drawing ever. Dude I can't like this is an unrecognizable figure.

But yeah, so his aura was like crazy and like he just had this really sinister energy. So I like put my phone down really fast and like he starts speaking at me and I don't know what he's saying. And then another dude that's like apparently with him like walks behind him and like also is staring at me and I'm like really freaked out. And then the only thing I could understand is he was like – he looks at me and he's like, do you want to be shot? And I was like –

no, I don't want to be shot. And then he's like flashing a gun like by his side like this. And he's like, do you want to be shot? And I was like, no. And then I start like freaking out because I see the gun and I start like crawling back on this like bench that's behind me. And then he literally shoots me in the fucking chest right here. And I felt like

Like, like it was like I had been shot before. Like, I don't know how I was able to like make up this pain in my head, but it was like, it started off like it was like my chest was on fire, like in just in that one little spot, it was like really warm. And then I felt like the blood like trickling down my chest. And then I felt like that warmth, like,

Go up into my face and in my jaw and I was like what the fuck and I started panicking and it was so real and I thought it was real life and then I just was like like freaking out and I was like I just got shot and then I woke up and right when I woke up I like grabbed my chest and I still felt the pain in my chest when I woke up and I was like is this my

telling me that like I have a cancerous tumor in my lung or some shit. Like it was so freaky, but I've never like woken up from a dream and still had pain from the dream in the morning. And it was like literally right here. And I was like, there's gotta be some cancer in my body or something. But it was also crazy that I was like dreaming about like religious, like ideals and ideologies. Cause like, what?

It's just not like I've never done that before. But yeah, it was super smoked and super real. And it freaked me the fuck out. And like I went the entire day thinking about it because I was like, dude, what the fuck does that mean? And it was it was like it was painful. Like I have never been in that much pain. I've never had like a physical pain, but I've never had a physical pain from a dream where it's like I was injured in the dream. And then I woke up with like that pain. I've had like.

Not pain, but when I was in such distress, I felt like I was like... I don't know if you've ever cried so hard that your body feels a certain way when you do that. You feel like... Well, I'm a man, so I don't cry. Oh, you don't cry? Yeah, men don't cry. Boys don't cry. I feel like I've seen you cry. You ever heard the Frank Ocean thing? Boys don't cry.

I think that was more of like a like commentary on that. That boys don't cry. Yeah. No, it was like it was like an artistic take on it because I think he believes men should show up. Josiah just farted. Yeah, we have Josiah watching us today because we need to perform to like a real person and Kai couldn't make it because he had a flat tire on his car.

Yeah, Josiah has a stinky bottom, soggy bottom. Yeah, he has a really stinky bottom. He's been farting around the house. And then he also went out of his way. He was like, have you ever ordered from Simply Salad? Which Josiah is the freak who just goes on Postmates, falls for those pictures, and orders from literally anywhere on the app.

And orders. And also his salad tasted like a salad I would eat in hospital while a grandparent is dying upstairs. I was about to say, some random person just made that salad in their home kitchen just like this and delivered it to his front door. And he asked for apple juice and they didn't have apple juice so they gave him the most yellow vitamin water I've ever seen. Like, why is it that yellow? It's like...

It's it's opaque like what's in there? You know what's crazy is that I used to think those were super healthy But they're like the most unhealthy drink you can drink like the name is a complete fucking lie. Oh Azul came to visit today. He's so good. Hi man little bitches. He says he wants food. He looked up at the camera. Yeah Come here boy. Azul podcast feature. Come here bachi.

Oh. Scaredy cat. But yeah, I haven't like had like woken up with like a physical pain from being hurt in a dream, but I have had like waking up and like feeling an aching from crying. But that's fucking crazy. You know what it was? It was your body pulsating because it wants a hit of a puffball. I know. I was in withdrawal. You know what's crazy is that I'd like...

A few episodes ago, I was like, I'm done. Like, I can't smoke them anymore. Like, it's impossible to get them. Like, it's over. Like, it's finally over. And then at the DJ Pauly D party, all the photos that came out, I had a puff bar in my hand the entire time. And all of the comments on TikTok were like, yeah, I thought he was, yeah, fucking right, he quit. But in fairness, it wasn't mine. You're literally giving somebody out there PTSD to a family member who's like, I'm going to stop smoking. Like, you know when kids are like, is this?

If this gets 100k, my dad will stop smoking cigarettes. Or like someone needing a liver transplant and they just can't stop drinking alcohol. Oh my god. Like, mine was a little less like sinister. But yeah, right. Yeah. But we didn't finish the boys don't cry conversation because like I've literally never cried in my life. It's just not true. See? I guess you guys are boys and not men. Boys should cry.

Actually, thank you for that. No, it's an artistic take, but men should cry. Men should show their emotions. Yeah, if they're pussies, bro. Oh my God. If they're not alpha. Men who cry get pussy. Men who cry are pussies and they're not alpha. I'll just say that. I am going to be honest. I don't know. Like when people are like, is it Sigma? Smegma male. Yeah. No, smegma is what comes out of my coochie when I'm eating bad. Discharge male. But...

Sigma is lower and alpha is higher. No, sigma is like... Oh, I don't even...

fuck with that toxic masculinity. They're toxic masculinity, but they're like, I don't care to be a leader. I am a natural leader. Like I don't, I exude leadership qualities and alphas like have to try to be leaders, but smegma males just like have it. Like they're just naturally that. And like, they don't even want it. Like they don't want women to be all over them like me. Like I don't want it. And it's a painful fucking thing for me to go through.

And I just have to push them away. You're adding an extra syllable to that word that you don't need. Woman. No, you need to wow men. Yeah. That's what you want to do. You do not want a woman. You want to wow men. Yeah. You like choked on your tongue with that one a little bit. Yeah.

I was gonna say something and I forgot it was right before the episode started. I was like, oh no, we need to say that on the podcast. I know what it is. What? Should I say it? Say it. Man with foreskin. Oh, I don't remember. Uncut gym. Oh, oh, I was saying, this is so not funny. I was saying like, how many people do you think made the joke?

Post uncut gems being like, oh, let me see your uncut gem. At least 100. Yeah, people have said that. And people have said it in a joking way, but being serious. The way some people just can't flirt without joking. People have definitely been like, let me see your uncut gem. Can I actually see your gem?

Is it uncut? I wish it was uncut. Don't get me fucking started. I wish I had foreskin. Okay, now we don't have to open the conversation of you begging the world for your foreskin back. Give me back my foreskin. If I had it, I would chew on it and then use it as, you know those plastic reusable lid toppers for the fridge? Yeah, I would use that. I would plug the tip of my penis and fill it up and pee into it and fill it up like a balloon.

Why is it amen and not amen? Can I get an A woman? No. Can you get A woman? Yeah. To give me top. Okay. No, you're done. You're done for the day. Wait, I have to look at my notes because I'm literally like, I feel brain dead. I have one. Why was Selfie C the original muser, which eventually became TikTok? TikTok.

And she got destroyed. And no one is talking about how bullied she was for being the OG TikToker. And now all of you bitches are doing the exact same fucking thing as she was, but she got bullied relentlessly for it. Even I joined in on the conversation. Yeah, I made fun of her. Sometimes I don't know why I hate people. I just do because everybody else does. Not...

always but like nickelback for example like okay i have no reason you were gonna say someone who we could all relate to but you're not about to sit here and pitch the argument that there should be no reason why we like don't like why don't you like nickelback because i fucking hate their music but their music is not the worst music in the world

Okay, keep going. But yeah, I'm just saying like there's some people that like are bandwagon- ba- bandwagon hated like SM6, the TikTok band. Like that's not bad. This song sucks. I hate this song. This reminds me of Texas and begging my mom for like a redemption tea with the fucking cross and the angel wings and the rhinestones all over it and it says "revenge" on the back.

Yeah. It's just not for me. Okay, I will say I don't hate Nickelback. I just don't care for them. Yeah, and that's fair. But people online are relentless. But I saw a video not too long ago, like an interview on a podcast with him. And he was saying, like, the reason why they're still relevant is because of the hatred that they got, which is so real, like...

All it was was just like... And it's also not real hatred. Like, people don't actually hate them. Yeah, it's just like a joke. Like, they were like the butt of the joke for so long. So it keeps the conversation going. That's why SM6 is still around. What is that? That family band. Oh, yeah.

Okay, y'all brought that up today and I was like shocked because I haven't thought about that or seen it in so long. Are they still popping like that? Not like what they were, but they still have a fan base and viewership. And I watched like probably 300 of their videos this morning from like 8 a.m. to like 11.30.

Just scrolling through their feed and just like deep diving and catching up on everything they've done. They were in a Tubi original movie. Like they got casted and it's like a full fucking budget film. Wait, what's Tubi? It's like that free streaming service. Oh. But the budget was insane. It was like, I couldn't believe it.

who's that oh she's still posting she's fucking lit she's still around we need her on the podcast to talk about that i know selfie c being our first guest yeah people would be pissed they'd be like dude why why is that the first person on um also us acting like josie hasn't been on like three times literally not a guest like he's literally not he's just a friend you're more than i guess you're a friend

I'm sure a lot of y'all have noticed we don't have many ads anymore and you're probably thinking, wow, oh my God, I feel so bad for them. They deserve ads. But we're doing our job. You're not doing your job. You need to fucking subscribe and engage with me or I will never do my job again. I like, I can't believe I miss reading ads. I like, I miss the taste. You should be lucky for me to bring all those people to the podcast because I would be a guest.

I actually don't know what he fucking said. That freaked me the fuck out because I was looking at him and I couldn't hear the words coming out of his mouth. And I couldn't piece it together. That was really scary. Oh my God, that was literally horrifying. But yeah, Selfie C being the OG...

Primal, just like everybody jump on and hate this person for no reason. Yeah, but that was also like the big trend. That was like pre... So there's before Christ and after Christ, but then there's before Taylor Swift's crucifixion and post-Taylor Swift's crucifixion. And post-Taylor Swift's crucifixion...

We learned that to not be fooled by the trickery of men who just hate women and want to, like, sacrifice them and fucking, like, tear them down publicly because it's really easy as a young person to jump on, especially if, like, someone you idolize is involved. Then you're like, yeah, that person is a bitch. Fuck her. I fucking hate her because we all have demonic, misogynistic ideas about

just drilled into our heads and it's very easy but before the crucifixion not me I get oh so you think you're better yeah 100% but you just admitted that you like jumped onto the selfie see hate train so I didn't say that and you're fucking freaking out and saying I said that which is really fucked up of you to say that I would say something like that you said it you literally just said it we could replay it I didn't say that shit

I did not say that shit. Wow. Where's my defense? Okay. Yeah. You're a fucking crazy bitch. And both of y'all are ugly as fuck. That's your defense when you're caught lying is that we're ugly? Yeah. No.

Well, you have a huge wiener. All right. All right. Yes, I do. I do. I do. I really have a big fucking schlong. What I was saying is I was going to be like, oh, now I feel like the Internet is smarter. But that's not true because women constantly are getting berated on the Internet. It's literally like a pastime for the Internet is to choose one girl for everybody to make fun of. And we all fall victim to it because it's just entertaining. And it also sucks.

It's a tribe building technique that we haven't gotten rid of when we were like villagers and we all lived in small little tribes all around and we were nomadic. We had to find one common thing to hate. So it bonded us. That's something I learned recently is that like or not learned, but like my mind was changed. I mean, I never thought gossip was bad, but like.

Gossip is actually really fucking healthy. Like, if you think about it... Oh, did you see the thing that talked about how, like, gossip between women was, like, really demonized? It was demonized, but I saw this dude kind of, like, breaking down gossip, and he was just, like, saying, like, oh, it's, like...

It is like me telling you it's like a really good like connection builder. It's like me telling you like I would never fucking do that to you without outwardly saying that. Like when you're gossiping about something someone did and it's also building like community and just like it's actually really healthy when you're talking shit behind people's back. So.

Back to it I go. Yeah, continue to talk shit about people who you claim to love. As long as it's not to their face. Say it with me. Talk shit behind people's back as long as it's not to their face and they can't hear you. The thing is, like, I do agree, but I just, like, love talking shit. But I don't talk shit about people I actually love. I talk shit about people who I literally don't know.

Because I am no better than anybody else on the internet. And I'm like, this is so annoying that they did this because I see somebody said that they did that. And then when it's turned on me, I literally want to kill myself. And I'm like, can everybody stop? And then you meet them in person. You're like, damn, they're actually really cool. They're normal. That has happened to you six times in the last year and a half. It's just like...

You relentlessly talking shit about someone and then you meet them and you're like, damn, I actually had a real conversation with them and I, like, saw their side of things and it's, like, cool. But you have to give me, like, I remember when...

one time we talked about this and somebody was like i think it's so fucked up that anya openly admits to that like you want me to lie like i literally talk shit like i do and like i know that's a fault on my part but the fault in our stars i know that's the fault in my stars but like you have to admit i have gotten better at it like i've been biting my like i that was a new year's resolution for me was to stop saying it talking as much shit or like

myself to like gossip and I feel like I've been a little better at it but that's also because I've been drowning myself in different forms of media and I just haven't been on my phone as much and also I redownloaded TikTok but I made sure to fall on the part of TikTok that gives me absolute garbage nothingness and I'm not on the real side I'm on the side of TikTok where like it's literally just random people from buttfuck Idaho posting shit and I'm like I cannot believe this person has a phone

like this is crazy my uh tick tock feed has been like consuming all consuming like i can sit on that it is crazy how quickly i can go from like no tick tock at all to watching it eight hours a day like it is it is terrifying how like

it is to like fall back into that shit. And it's also crazy that like it's literally mind control and it's like we're living the biggest mass psychosis event in human history and we're all being controlled by these devices in our phones and these screens in our life and like no one is ever really thinking about it or paying attention. And if you are, there's nothing you can do to break the cycle and we're kind of just fucked. Yeah, I like think about that because we've literally talked about TikTok and how much it encapsulates your life.

What was that? The Beyonce thing. Oh. You don't sound... I'm not even fucking trying, that's the thing. That's the thing about me is I wasn't even trying just now. But when you're saying that, are you saying that because you think it sounded good and you're like, whoa, I sound good when I'm not trying? Yeah. Okay, yeah. Yeah, more of that. Right. More of that than anything. Anything but that. That was crazy. You literally...

You sounded crazy. Also, you like being unable to sit still doing that. You moved like 38,000 times. Like if someone had to motion track you, it would be like 38,000 frames of where you're hanging. You know what?

You know what the crazy thing is? When you are singing higher notes like that, your body's reaction is to lift your head up, but that's actually constricting your vocal cords. I learned this in music class when I was singing. I didn't take classes. I just know these things. They come naturally to me. Oh, it sounded like you were going to say you learned them. I was going to say I was teaching people. Oh, okay. Yeah, I was teaching people. And so don't lift your head up when you're trying to sing high notes because it restricts your vocal cords. You want to keep it down and open and just...

Let it go from the gut. Like a lot of people are singing from the head instead of the chest. And you just want to go like, let it out.

There is a thing called head voice. Should I get into it? There's like chest voice and head voice. I mean, it sounds like you're pulling shit out of your ass that you maybe saw on TikTok. But like, it just doesn't feel like you knew these things like from the beginning of your life. Like, are you trying to convince us that you just like naturally caught it? I just figured it out. Yeah, I just figured it out as I was going. Oh, okay. And he's mad because Drew is letting the girls have it. And he's... Mm-hmm.

Also, okay, I am tired of this. No more saying things are dupes. You are buying a bootleg. You are not buying a dupe. You are not buying something that is similar. A dupe is something similar to the thing. Which is okay. Which is okay to buy dupes and bootlegs. It's okay to buy dupes and bootlegs. But also, I'm like, when I see it happening to a small company, I'm like, why are you doing that to them? Not that.

A lot of the companies I see happening to are big companies and it's like, whatever, who cares? But like, can we just accept that it's a bootleg? Like a bootleg is fine. Anastasia Better Hills dupe. Anastasia Better Hills dupe. You think it's Better Hills? Anastasia Better Hills. That's what a dupe would be, Anastasia.

Anastasia Butterhill's. Dude, her being found dead in her London flat. She was found dead in her London flat. And that's why it's so upsetting. Stop buying bootlegs of her stuff because it goes to her family now. There have been rumors going around that I died at 15. Babes, I'm 17 and I'm still kickin'.

Like one day you will wake up and look back and be so shameful the fact that you were afraid of your age It's okay. You're turning 25. I'm the only 17 year old in the world to grow a beard like this It's not a joke I just I mean, I've known I've known you for 10 years and you weren't seven when I met you I was six. You're right

But yeah, it's not a dupe. That is a bootleg and that's okay. It's just, it's a bootleg and that's okay. But also don't buy bootlegs from small companies because that's just mean. That little girl in the middle of Iowa selling off Etsy deserves her $30. Her check. Give her her check. Yeah, so what we just found out is Inya is classist and she wants people to be poor.

I also, um, came to the conclusion that scat lovers, like people who love being pooped on and shit on, are- Oh, I thought you meant scat like the music. No. I was like- Are love- are braver in the- I believe scat lovers are braver than the Marines.

And scat is being pooped on. Yeah, like shit on the chest. That is fucking disgusting. I'm sorry. That's what I'm saying. Because everybody's knee jerk reaction is like,

That's fucking gross as fuck. But that doesn't stop them from loving being pooped on and asking people. Could you imagine asking? Like, what if like when we hooked up, I was like, can you poop on my chest? Well, it's different between us because we just have this like we live in our own world when we hook up where like nothing on the outside matters. So there's no social constructs of what's right and morally wrong.

So like we can just do those things. But like, but asking someone. Imagine hooking up with a stranger. That's what I'm saying. Like imagine asking someone and being like, I like, I have this, like I have this thing. Yeah. Like I have this thing. It's kind of weird. Like, I don't, I don't know if like you're in, I'm just gonna say, can you poop on my chest? What would you say? I would, I would crack the fuck up if I'm being honest. I would like destroy that person's life because I would laugh so hard. If it was someone that had like an internet connection,

like was relevant at all I would make fun of them yeah I would spread that like wildflower I wouldn't I wouldn't publicly say it but I would tell everybody I know I would yeah I would spread it like wildflower like cases um it's like it's like this um yeah I would

Also, like, the thing is you definitely have to be, like, seeing someone for a while before you bring that up. Or you're just, like, so far in your life that you're like, I've restricted myself from having this for so long that you're meeting people on apps and that's, like, one of the first things you bring up. I was gonna say, I literally have a billion dollar idea. Million, million dollar idea because I'm pretty sure there's, like, 64 poop lovers in the world. But we need to figure out a way to connect them via...

an app what if they're not a scat lover app and we could call it like literally scat we could call it scat and it's like it's like grinder but for poop yeah literally literally scatter that is a that is a thousand dollar idea and yeah that's literally like that's worth that's that's worth like maybe two hundred dollars um

But it's more like you have to invest $200 into it. It's not like you're not making profit off of that. How do these apps make money? Oh, you have to pay for certain apps, huh? I've just never had a dating app because I'm not some like...

fucking like disgusting self-loathing loser who like needs attention like that attention just comes to me and I don't have to like go begging for it and I'm not just so alone and like decrepit and sitting in my room and I'm disgusting and I hate myself and I just need affection and I can't find it because I'm fucking loser like no it just comes to me

That's that I agree with that fully. I would never use any of those apps Did you like that that was me checking the thing That was that was really nice. Yeah, like I wouldn't do that either like let me see your phone Let me go through your phone. Look, it's simple. Let me go through your phone. Okay here look I

No, give me your phone. I don't think you're cheating on me. I'm just like, I want to go through your app store to see if you ever downloaded it. Because I know you don't have it on your phone right now because we're dating. Oh, my God. No, that's not it. That's a different app. Oh, my God, there's three. There's three in a row. Four. Oh, what's that? What's what? What's that? What is the logo? It's an S and it says like Scruff. What's that? What's that?

Give me your phone. No. Oh my God, you're cheating on me. What is that? No, that's for the dog. You said you wanted a dog. It's ZocDoc, but for vets. Oh, okay, yeah. Because I was like, Scruff, like a scruffy dog? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, okay. Yeah, that's what that is. Okay, I got so scared you were cheating on me.

I think the world is ending. I thought I was dying. There was an earthquake the other day and I woke up with my heart racing and I looked up at my lamp and it was kind of moving a little bit and I was like, oh, it's going to fall on me and it's going to break and I wasted all of that fucking money. Me when it's a paper lamp and it literally would have just landed on you and rolled over. And then in group chat I was like, okay, you're a paper lamp. Okay, fuck you. Like, all of you. Well, the night that the earthquake happened, it's when I...

Had the worst sore throat. So let me explain my sickness. When I came back from New York, I had a bit of a sore throat and then it like just kind of lingered off and like went away. No big deal. Then I think because I just like was overly like doing things for like the week I got back. Oh, I'm boring you to death. I'm literally boring you to death. You're acting like your dad. I fucking hate dating you. I hate dating you. I should have listened to everybody in my life. I should have never fucking dated you.

What's up? You know how some people say you're the best mistake I ever made? You're the worst fucking mistake I ever fucking made. Oh my god. You were the biggest mistake. Has Alexa Demi or Cindy Sweeney said that in Euphoria before? No. That is literally a line they would say. You were literally the worst fucking mistake I ever made. I hate every day I wake up and I look at myself and part of me is missing because of fucking you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. Jesus.

You are like, you know how conservatives think that like lizard people run the country? You are one of those people. You are literally a lizard person to me. Well, I'm not conservative and I think lizard people run the country. You're just my little, you're my little star and you think things. Yes, I'm a conspiracist. No, no, no, no, I'm not. But I woke up...

Okay. Why are you doing that? Don't do that. Don't show them all that. Oh my God. Oh my God.

We've been hanging out too much like for the past like few years because I'm getting to the point where like I keep seeing you and I want to grab you inappropriately because it'd be funny to me. No, because it is funny. I've been recently like wanting to get butt ass naked and bend over and spread my ass cheeks so y'all look at my butthole in the eye.

But I won't do that to you guys. But I have been walking around with my hairy ass out for the past couple days. Yeah, my whispering eye. Yeah, I was in the bathroom and Josie and Drew were knocking on the door last night and they were like, come out, come out, come out, wait, come out. Actually, we got it on video. And when I came out, it was just Drew's bare ass. And literally, like, I don't even think I had a reaction. No, at this point. Yeah, it didn't mean anything to me. Oh, and then the other day we were like...

The other day we were laying in bed and Drew was showing me something and his pinky landed on my boob. And he went like this way. It like landed on it and he didn't want to make a big deal of it. And I thought I was so slick. He lifted it so slowly as if like when you're like sneaking around and you're like,

I thought I was being so fucking slick too and I was like, "Okay, we're just gonna act like that didn't happen." But no, and he was like, "Were you fucking grabbing my tit? Fucking touching my boobs and shit?" Why everybody who mimics me gives me a voice like that? What's up with that? They give me a deep fucking huckleberry thin ass voice. "Oh, can you help me put my tampon in?" Remember? I do- what?

I woke up with the worst fucking sore throat in my life. Literally, I've never felt a sore throat like that. And I've had sore throat like pretty often or like enough times that I feel like I've had the worst of it. But it was so fucking bad that I woke up and I actually felt like I was choking and I had woken up to the earthquake and I thought I was making it up in my head. And then I just like got up and got water and I just ignored it. Remember when I said something big is coming?

Coming. Yeah, I remember when I said that. I thought you were talking about you. Oh my god, wait, we literally did say that to Sabrina when I was like, oh, like something big is coming and I was like, oh, it's earthquake weather. Do you remember that? Yeah. And she was like, oh my god, is that like for real? And she got really excited. She's like, wait, you can predict earthquakes? And I was like, no, like you can't do that. Drew tricked our friend who doesn't live here that we would be able to like know if an earthquake is coming and she believed it because she's like from Miami. It's also crazy that

I predicted that. Wow. It is interesting that, like, I'm able to just, like, kind of peer into the future, lift the veil a little bit and just see what's, like, going on behind the scenes. Oh, my God. That's something that I've been doing recently is, like, it sounds schizoaffective, but, like, I've been able to, like, see behind the veil a little bit, like...

And it's been fucking me up. Like, it's literally been... Oh, my God. Have you ever heard of, like, what's it called? Shifting? I am losing you by the day. Like, by the day, I think I need to start supervising what you look at on your phone like you're 15. Like... No, have you heard of shifting? Yeah.

No. It's like this thing that people do where they like shift into a different reality with their like they and they build a whole other life in the reality. And I've gotten on shifting TikTok and it is the craziest shit I've ever seen. I need to take your phone away from you. We need to like limit your screen time. Oh, we really do. You've been going down like rabbit holes that I don't know about. And I'm like, how did you get there? Josie looks awful right now.

Oh my god. But you know what? I do agree with you. I feel like I have seen behind the veil, but in like a crazy way because on my birthday, guys, it was my birthday. I know. Don't even talk to me about it. I will feel myself. We almost made it all the way through without you crying on your birthday this year, but it was a happy cry this year. Yeah. But I've been crying all week alone in silence. Yikes. Just keep that weird sad shit to yourself. Sunday fun day. Let's leave it at that.

I don't even want to say it. God forbid it gets left on camera. I'll tell you after. Damn. Yeah, yeah. Just, you know. Oh, my God. But, yeah, you know, it's just a fun fucking time in my life. But, oh, my God. Why'd you constrict my finger? I was trying to pull it over to me. But keep going. My finger.

But on my birthday, I got so fucking high. And also, I know I've been talking about drinking and getting high a lot on the podcast. It is a problem. Which is a stark difference from the beginning. But I am going on a break. Also, I do want to clarify, it's not a problem. I'm not getting blacked out and shit. It's literally not that bad. But I am going on a sober streak because I just got really sick and I was...

thinking about it and just contemplating my usage and I've just been really bored so then I'll accept any chance to go out and get a drink but I'm gonna go on a sober streak because it will make me feel really good and I will feel way healthier and it's kind of like a tolerance break but it's not really because what like I'm stretching my tolerance from like five milligrams of weed to like back to like being able to get highest fuck off one milligram but I got...

So fucking high. And you know what was freaking me out is because like I haven't even like explained this in detail, but my gorgeous friends took me to a gorgeous dinner and it was super sweet. I got all dressed up. It was very nice. I paid for it. Okay. Yeah. It was $960 and I paid for it.

Oh my god, you literally didn't fucking pay me back. I also didn't pay you for the cleaners or something else. There was something else I had to pay for. Oh my god, I'm literally just everyone's fucking punching bag. Everybody uses me for my financial literacy. It's like, oh my god, Drew, Drew, can you pay for this? Drew, can you pay for that? Yeah, I'll pay for it, but if you pay me back. And then I just don't get paid back. Oh, but it's your fault because you didn't ask for the money. No, I should have people around me and in my life that really...

want to pay me back aren't excited to pay me back to get that debt off their shoulders yeah you're my david dobik yeah i'll never forget that it's bad but that's for another time no we shouldn't get yeah no you're gonna be done if we get into that

I think what happened was we were at dinner and like I didn't really want to drink because again like I was like I'm so over having drinks and the drinks at the restaurant weren't really sitting right with my palate so I was like whatever I'll just have an edible like Orion has edibles I'll just take one off of her Orion has a way higher tolerance than me but

I just didn't think anything of it. Usually if I have a drink and I get high after, like I will never get too high. It's just like balance it out for me. That's not what happened. I took half of this edible. I might've even taken less than half, which was less than five milligrams. And I think what happened was I fully forgot I took it. And when we were getting up to leave, we're like walking around and stuff. And before I know it, I'm sitting in the passenger seat of the car with the worst cotton mouth of my life. And,

And I was like... And we passed all the gas stations in Malibu. Because I just felt bad because I didn't want us to have to stop. Because I... Respectful. Like, I was just like, whatever. I'll hold out. But I had the worst car mouth ever. And then Orion played this song that made me really think about the people in my life. And then it just, like, set me into, like... I'm not kidding. Like...

I genuinely do not believe I'm somebody who needs to take shrooms because if this is how intense I can feel emotionally off of just being high off of weed, I do not believe that. I think shrooms would push me too far and I would have a fucking break because I get so...

I was just so overwhelmed. It was like actually insane. Like I was literally thinking about my whole life and like what it means for me to be alive and what my connections to everybody I know means and all like the love I have and like all these things that I was just feeling so overwhelmed that I started sobbing.

And then it started freaking me out because I was like, oh, I am so high right now that I like can't control how much I'm crying. And then I was with all my closest friends in the world and I was just like so happy. But then it got to the point where we were sitting on the couch and I was literally freaking out looking at all of you. Well, it was because we were watching RuPaul's Drag Race. And I think that's the most dangerous show you can watch on weed. Like also I think hallucinogens and weed are the devil. I've made that decision. Yeah.

Also, you know what didn't help is I saw a video of someone talking about weed and especially when you consume it rather than smoke it, how it has it releases the same chemical compounds as a psychedelic into your system. And for a lot of people, it will act as a psychedelic. And I have been thinking about that a lot recently because every time I get high, I literally die.

I'm like, oh, this has to be what shrooms are. And I know people who like love shrooms are going to be like, it's nowhere close. I don't care. For me, bada bing, bada boom. Like same thing. It doesn't make a difference. But that was also in my head. And then that was freaky me out because I was like, oh my God, did I accidentally just take like...

Did I accidentally just get, like, super high, like, on a psychedelic on my birthday? Like, what's happening? And I was just thinking so much. I did put PCP into your drink. Oh, my God. That's what did it. Yeah. That had to happen. What did it? This woman in the gift shop at this restaurant. Oh.

- Oh yeah. - Was like, she had such good vibes. She was going around hitting all the wind chimes and shit, which there was like a frequency of sound that I've literally never felt in my life. It was more of like a feeling than a sound. And it was the most beautiful thing ever. And then I was like, oh, I wanna buy that giant ass wind chime. It was like $50,000, not actually, but it was really fucking expensive. But anyway, she had good vibes. And then she was with her husband, I'm assuming.

And right when I walked in, they were all staring at me and I was like, this is like really weird. Like, why is everybody looking at me? And I was like, do I have something on my face? Like, I guess it is weird that I'm at this restaurant and I'm looking the way I am. Like, this is a nice restaurant, whatever. I didn't think too much of it. I was really insecure though. And then like he, everyone started like smiling and like smirking at me. And I was like, am I in a nightmare? Like literally what is happening right now? Like, why is everyone laughing at me? And then like, I walked past this guy and he's like really like,

like laughing under his breath, looking at me. And then his wife walks back over to him.

and like i make like a round around and they're just like following me in the entire entire time and like actually what is happening yeah and then right before i leave like the wife picks up a book of jesus christ and was like this is you this is literally you and she like points it and i have a picture of the picture oh yeah i want to see it so bad because i don't think i saw it but yeah i uh she said i looked like jesus christ and i in in her defense i literally did

because my hair looked like that. Oh, for real. But yeah, that was my story. Really grasping at straws here for me. I don't think we have mold poisoning anymore. I think we have like carbon monoxide poisoning or like a little gas leak in the house. Yeah. Somewhere. There's got to be a gas leak somewhere, whether it's the boiler room or like

The AC is just pumping gas into our house or something. Or we just need to forfeit and finally go on medication. No. To normalize our brain. Absolutely not. Absolutely not. Yeah, right. Right. I agree. I will not take normal pills. Normal shouldn't be in the dictionary. You know what the new word in the fucking Webster's dictionary is? Goblin mode. And I'm literally not lying.

That's so sad. They added it and it's goblin mode and it means to be... What do you think it means? I don't know because I've never heard that term. Like how... Just off the top of your head. Like when people are like, oh, I'm on demon mode. Like I'm doing like naughty things. That's what I thought, but it's literally the exact opposite. It's like being like a slob and like lazy and shit like that.

Like, how many times have you... Who says that? Literally no one. I've literally never heard it once in my entire life. I guess a part of me is annoyed at things like that being added to the dictionary, but, like, they're going to have to be able to deconstruct what the fuck we were talking about in 40 years when they look back at everything we were saying, and the people are not going to have any context clues of why the fuck we sound like this, because we sound like idiots. And I really want to stop saying like as much because...

Because I hear myself talk all the time. We always listen to the episodes. I'm always listening to myself say like. But I just don't know how to not do that because I speak so fast.

So I guess what I have to do is have pauses. There's like a buffer there that the word like is like a buffer for you. Yeah, it's fully is. But I'm going to attempt to not do it as much. Although I think I did it quite a lot in this episode. Because when I was talking about the birthday thing, I think I said like probably 8,000 times. Yeah. Right. Right. We should replace it with right. Right. Right.

Yeah, I don't know why I say like all the time. Like I want to like literally know why it's in my vocabulary. Because like, oh, literally there it is. A fully is just a buffer because I feel like, but see, using it in that context, it makes sense. I feel like most people who don't say like as much say um. Because I've been paying attention a lot to how people who are just talking constantly speak.

And they'll usually go, um, but that's what I was thinking. And, um, and they'll say, um, a bunch. And like is for the quicker, uh, quicker speakers. Yeah. I, um, oh, I just said, um, and like, uh, I was really insecure by in the beginning of the podcast, but then, um,

i got over it because i don't give a what people think about me also people are really quick to point out saying like a bunch but listen to yourself you just don't realize you do it because you're not being recorded and there is no video evidence of you doing it but i feel like it's so common especially within younger people although i get really like upset with myself when i watch

People who I kind of look up to speak for a long period of time and they don't say like. And it makes me really sad because I'm...

- I'm at a loss for words. - You're at a lack of words. Something has shifted in this space. Not pointing it out as Josiah, but like something has shifted in the last like 10 minutes. Do you feel that? - Yeah, this has just been a hard episode because I have nothing to give the world because I, oh my God, we were at a meeting yesterday and

I was freaking the fuck out. It was the most schizophrenic I've ever seen in any of my entire life. And I was like, no, like, please, like, turn it on. Like, just turn on like normal person, please. I couldn't do it. You know what also doesn't help is we were with...

Our manager who at this point I feel so comfortable around that I don't have to put on my fake business hat and act like I know what the fuck I'm doing at any point. So that didn't help. But also because I am just so fucking congested in the head right now, I can't hear as well, if that makes sense. I just am suffering from like congestion all around and brain fog. And we were at this restaurant yesterday and it was like full.

full of like exactly what people make fun of LA for when you know when people are like oh LA is so like this and then normal people will be like that is not what LA is LA has all of this and rarely are we in the situation where it's

very recognizable all the fucking transplants are in a room us included and I'm just looking around and I'm thinking about it's just freaking me out and I'm like what are we doing here why are we here and then that was freaking me out and then I'm like getting questioned about like my career and what I want to do with my life and I was just freaking the fuck out because I could also barely hear people so I couldn't be as witty because I literally like I already have a hard time listening because I'm always waiting for my turn to talk but now I really couldn't hear so I

people were talking to me and like making jokes to me and I was just like dude that area just has the worst fucking vibes possible it's the scariest street we also just had such like a weird day yesterday like we experienced something we've never experienced before early in the other day and then we had to go have an in person meeting which is something we haven't done in so long and meet new people and like it is like just weird industry shit that like yeah I don't know that like

I don't know. I don't know how to navigate it. It was just a really industry day. Yeah. I've been shifting recently into my alternate reality. Oh, this whole episode? Yeah, I have like a... Like anytime you see me staring off into the distance, I'm shifting into a different realm and it's me with my family of five years. Oh. Yeah. Oh, it's like you built a family. No, I'm... It's a distant like future. So I built... Like I literally like...

like made them oh like i didn't like have sex with someone and make babies like i just like like put it together okay yeah like you know the scene from robots um where they build their child oh yeah yeah i forget the penis that's kind of what i have going on in my world all right well thank you guys so much for watching this episode super awesome girl we gotta do media oh yeah sweet wow thank you josie

My media of the week is Saturday Morning Doze by Ernest Hood. I like to be with you in the sun, Bridget St. John. By the time I get to Phoenix, Glenn Campbell. And me, Mayor Venganza La India. That's my... And Tonight Tonight by the Smashing Pumpkins. That's my media. Oh, and then my movie is we watched Bottle Rocket and it was fucking awesome. Bottle Rocket was sick. It was so inspiring too to like...

like josh was explaining how it was created and like he just ran it was it bill murray he ran into bill murray wes anderson and was like uh they like kind of really got along and he was talking about this movie he needed to be made and bill murray literally gave him like a blank check for this movie and was like how much money do you need to make this movie and he was like eighty thousand dollars so they made bottle rocket on eighty thousand dollars and it's

Good proof that you don't need a lot of money to make good movies which like I never thought that but like you do need some money, but also It was crazy cuz like the entire time I was like this place is so familiar where they're filming like it looks so familiar and they filmed a lot of the movie like 30 minutes from my hometown in Texas, which I thought was like Really really green out

And then just we deep dived on all of them, like all the characters in the movie. But to be fair, that is equivalent to 150K today. Word. So it's quite a lot of money. Mine is Bittersweet Symphony by The Verve. Erase slash rewind the cardigans.

I've kind of been on a Cure, the Cure binge recently. Oh, that's awesome. I've never really listened to the Cure like that. Same. I have by proxy. Like, we've all heard every song they've ever made. But Friday I'm in Love by the Cure is really cute. I've just been, like, in Porcelain by Moby. Like, Josh described it perfectly. It's like, like...

At the end of a movie a song plays and it's like the happiest song ever because they like won They like did the thing they were trying to do or they got the person they were trying to get like whatever it ends up being and it's just like Like celebration music kind of and that's kind of been my vibe. It's just really happy music Um, this playlist is so that although it's it's like a playlist somebody made me. Um Oh god, where is it? But this is full of all of that sweet

Like all of these are that vibe. All of these songs are so like, remember? What? Us listening to this. Uh-uh.

Oh my fucking god. We talked about it. But all of the songs on this playlist are so like that. Like we did it. I was thinking about doing that the other day. Driving home after doing our first and only self tape ever. That was our first and only one together. And being like in the car ride home. Being like wow. We got the role. We're gonna be famous movie stars. Why did I just.

Also, Somebody Else's Guy by Jocelyn Brown. In what movie? What movie should I say? Let me check the old letterboxd. How the fuck did y'all find our letterboxd? And like, how the fuck did y'all find our letterboxd? Like, we haven't mentioned them by name 26 times. I just don't think I've said the name of the letterboxd more than once. I have to stand up, sorry. How the fuck do I get to my... There we go. You watched me spit, you nasty boy. Mm.

Josiah watched me spit. I have media as well. Okay, let's hear it. Let's hear it, babes. My movie is Parasite. My song is a star-spangled banner. I'm looking at your nasty-ass feet under the table. I know his toes. My other song is Finger Fuck a Chick by Jocelyn Hernandez. Okay. Respect. Respect. And Parasite actually is, because I watched Triangle of Sadness, and I was like, yeah, it's alright, babe. Triangle of Sadness is a masterpiece. I won't let you...

put triangle sadness down like that because it's such a good movie finding out that the girl at the end or not at the end but the girl is dead she died before the movie was released changes the entire ending of the movie yeah really yeah and she killed that role she fucking slayed out for that role um

Okay, well that was the episode. It's crazy how last week everyone was like, I think this is the best episode they've ever done. And now this week is going to be the worst episode. Yeah, easily, easily the worst episode we've ever done. Something was wrong. Well, I'm really fucking sick. Yeah, no, I feel fucking crazy right now. I feel off. And Josiah's here, so it's like... Yeah, it's because we don't have fucking Kai. Okay.

Yeah. All right. Bye. Literally numb. I thought I was like on the wire.