Deep Dive
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Hi folks, Billy Hindle here, the voice of Alice Dyer in The Magnus Protocol. Today I just wanted to take some time to run you through some of the exciting Magnus merchandise, as well as affiliate links, a brand new way to support the show. You can find affiliate links in the description of all new episodes. If you are based in the UK, be sure to check out Phantom Peak, a unique, immersive, open world adventure in London. Use the link in the show notes or code RUSTY to get 15% off tickets.
perfect for fans of escape rooms. Next up, be sure to check out our bespoke merchandise from our partners, including exclusive perfume scents inspired by John and Martin and ex-Altiora. Find out more by going to www.rustyquill.com forward slash S-B-P. Find Magnus and Rusty Quill themed TTRPG accessories, including dice trays, dice towers, and beautiful coasters from Harpscore by going to harpscore.com forward slash rusty dash quill.
See the Magnus Archives polyhedral die set from Dice Dungeon, including an exclusive D16 featuring icons representing the fears. Visit thedicedungeon.co.uk forward slash collections forward slash rusty dash quill to find out more. There are also new designs available on our official merchandise stores for t-shirts,
Stickers, posters, and more. Check the links in the description or go to www.rustyquill.com forward slash support. Thanks for listening. We hope you enjoy the show. To everyone else, this is a desk. But to you, it's a launch pad. You're starting blood. This ain't a desk. This is opportunity.
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Hi everyone, it's Anusha here, voice of Gwen in the Magnus Protocol. Today, I'm here to advertise a very exciting back-hit crowdfund that we will be using to raise funds for the Magnus Protocol Mystery Board Game. We are working with the amazing and talented team from Indie Boards and Cards, the team behind some other extremely successful board games such as The Resistance, Coup, The Sherlock Files and
and Flashpoint Fire Rescue. The Magnus Protocol Mysteries will be an easy-to-learn puzzle game, bringing you a series of engaging cases to solve and supernatural problems to resolve. The game will also feature brand new audio recordings from the cast of The Magnus Protocol. For more information, or to sign up to be notified of the launch of the crowdfund,
Go to www.rustyquill.com forward slash board game, where you can sign up for email updates. Or, for $1, you can also sign up for an early backer reward. This episode is dedicated to Odin Panic. Hello everyone, it's Odin, your nerd named after a Norse god. I hope you enjoyed this episode. I also hope you have a wonderful day, evening or night, whenever or wherever you are. Rusty Quill presents The Magnus Protocol
Episode 13: Futures So what are we thinking? Hmm... On the one hand, this technically counts as breakfast, so I should probably go with something light. But on the other, I'm in the mood for rich and cheesy. Choices, choices. Hmm... Yeah, I must admit, it is kinda weird waking up then immediately going out on a dinner date. Yeah, working nights is taking some getting used to. You seem alright.
You're not too bad yourself. I... I... Are you ready to order? I'll have the baked camembert and he's... I'll have the same. Thank you. Very good. Alice was right. It is easy to make you blush. You just caught me unawares. Of course.
So you asked her about me? Just doing my due diligence. And what else did she say about me? That you don't know how cute you are. Oh, uh, well... And that you're an overachiever, obsessive, a bit repressed, nosy, kind of a recluse... Thank you! ...and very easy to wind up. Well, she's not wrong, I guess. So who do I talk to to get a complete list of your flaws?
No one. I'm mysterious. Hmm. Well, jokes aside, we should probably just get all of our baggage out on the table now. It's risky enough dating at work without adding bombshell revelations to the mix. You wanna start with the big stuff? Okay then. I have a baby. Jack. He's just over a year old now. Cool. And before you ask, no, there's no dad on the scene, not even sure who he is.
I had a couple of wild years after I moved here. It was a really weird time for me, but somehow I got lucky enough to come out of it all with him. Fair enough. Do I get to meet him? That depends on your baggage, Dish. Alright. No kids of my own. Both my parents are still around. I haven't worked up the nerve to tell them that I bailed on my last job yet.
They care that much? I was tested as a kid and they said I was gifted so mum and dad got a bee in their bonnet and enrolled me in every enrichment program they could find. Like the Magnus Institute? No, they were the first ones that didn't want me. That why you're so hung up on them? I don't know, maybe that definitely feels like when it all started. When what started?
Well, after that it all just went downhill. Didn't get into Oxford, so I went to Nottingham. I graduated but I missed the first by one mark. Then I went to work at a legal firm. I was there for years, hoping they'd eventually sponsor me for a law degree. And? I had a breakdown. Stress. There was an incident at work. I freaked out during the presentation.
After that, they encouraged me to move on, and I did. Six unemployed months later, and I took a job at the OIR. Alice hooked you up? Yeah. Full disclosure, we dated at uni and stayed in contact after. I did my best to help her through her parents' deaths, but after that, we pretty much just dropped out of touch. According to her, she dropped me a line about the job after the most pathetic, vague post she had ever seen.
And now? Now she's a friend. An insufferable, obnoxious, know-it-all friend, but yeah, just a friend. Alright then. That everything, you think? Yeah. I did want to ask you though. Right. The cases at work, do you think they're real? Do you? I asked you first. I... don't know. I hope not. You? I'm pretty sure they're real.
More? Please. Can I help you Gwen? Is it my fault? You'll have to be more specific. Bonzo. One of the cases. Did it really happen? Was it because of me? Yes. Whatever horrible case you read, it happened. And am I responsible? To a degree. Tell me why. Sit. I don't want- Sit.
The world is full of opposing forces. Some benevolent, most not. In order for the wheels to keep on turning, all these forces need to be monitored and balanced. That is where we come in. That doesn't mean anything. And yet it is the only explanation you're going to get. For now. So what? We're the bad guys. We are managing the bad guys.
There should be an email in your inbox. We have another external that needs assignment. It's quite urgent. Gwen, I'll sort it. See that you do. Welcome to the ZorroTrade customer support line. This call may be recorded for training and monitoring purposes. Please select from one of the following options. For sales inquiries, press 1. For technical support, press 2. For complaints, press 3.
We're sorry that you are not completely satisfied with the ZorroTrade app. Unfortunately, all our operators are busy at the moment. Please leave a message, including your account number and an explanation of your complaint, and we will contact you as soon as possible. Thank you.
Listen, you thieving bastards, I want my money. I don't care about your suspicious activity bollocks. I have burnt my entire life to the ground for this stupid bloody app and now you owe me my goddamn money. So you can either pay up or I drop a line to the ombudsman and tell him all about your little projection trading. See what they make of it.
You can't just take my money, lock me out of your app, then expect me to roll over. I've been a user for years. Hell, I've probably invested more via this poxy little program than everyone else put together, and what do I have to show for it? Huh? You owe me. So either give me my money or I'll... I'll...
Is this meant to be like a punishment or something? I'm not a bad person, alright? Wanting to be rich doesn't make you a bad person. Sure, most rich people are dicks, but most of them started that way. Hell, most of them got to be rich because they were dicks. You don't even know me. I mean, sure, I went to public school, but I got there on a scholarship and I worked my ass off.
I had it from the other lads, of course I did. Otherwise they'd have ripped the piss out of me. One time I even faked a broken leg just to get out of admitting I couldn't afford a skiing trip. Classic. Of course Mum and Dad weren't happy but they'd been dirt poor their whole life so what did they know? I earned everything I got. Most of the other lads went to uni, Oxbridge and that. But not me. I had the plan. While the rest of them were stuck translating Plato or whatever, I would be out there earning bank.
I took my entire student loan out and got straight to shorting using Urap. This was back when it had only just launched. I struggled through your first janky interface, your weird background checks, all those damn glitches, but I stuck with it because unlimited margins and deposits was pretty sweet. Made some quick cash shorting failing startups, then used that to broaden into crypto, leveraged some EM ETFs, scraped up a few pennies, then started to go long on a few obvious winners like Omni and Sparkup for some hedging. Easy peasy.
It was good. It was working. I made up with the lads and suddenly I was the one buying the good stuff and, sure, money can't buy you love, but you'd be amazed what personal trainers, high in surgery and hair plugs can achieve on a speccy little finance nerd. Life was good. Bloody expensive, but good. I had a couple of close calls, sure, but something always came along. God bless Bitcoin, am I right?
So, yeah, then I got cocky and I bet against the big man himself. I shorted Dantex hard in 2020, stupid really, but the whole Zurich thing had wiped out a bunch of my portfolio and I got a tip off from one of the lads, so I went all in. And no, I don't blame Zorro Trade for that, but it was a bad time. I remember I was sitting on the deck with Ollie, watching the sun set in the Riviera and I was ready to close up shop.
I grabbed my phone and started messing with the settings, looking to settle up. That was when I noticed your new "Personal Projection Short Selling" feature. It was disabled, buried under advanced lab settings and covered in disclaimers without any explanation, but it still grabbed me. I had no idea what it was and there was nothing about it online. Just that one slider of the warning.
These settings are experimental and may not function as intended. User discretion is advised. You really think that is enough after what you've done to me? But hey, screw it. I figured I was already basically broke, what did I have to lose? I flicked it on and a new dialogue window opened with two words: "Investment amount." Bear in mind that at this point I barely had a pot to piss in, so I put in my last few grand. Why the hell not?
The phone panged and a little approving tick appeared and then it was gone. Nothing else. I carried on drinking and passed out around 4am. Oli kicked me shoreside in Le Brusque the next evening. He wasn't too impressed with the mess I'd made of his guest cabin and let's be honest, we didn't really get on anyway. He dumped me at the dock with nowhere to stay and told me he'd send me a bill for the TV. I tried calling up one of the other lads but no one was picking up. That's when I checked the group chat.
Turns out I must have run my mouth the night before because now Ollie had told everyone I was broke. Apparently they always knew I'd end up back in the gutter eventually. I was just writing a proper response when my phone died. I'd been borrowing Ollie's charger. Yeah, I know I'm going long with this, but tough. You can just shut up and listen.
So, it turns out that stepping off a yacht, alone, in some pissin' fishing dock in the arse end of nowhere, in the middle of the night with a thousand dollar case and a lost look on your face is a good way to get yourself mugged. They took everything. The case, my watch, my jacket, even my shoes. But not my phone. Don't know why, it's like they didn't even notice it. Cooked the hell out of me though. Talk about rock bottom.
It took me a while to convince anyone to let me borrow their charger and call the British Embassy. Took me even longer to get through to the Embassy. They told me to go online for an emergency travel permit and it was as I was applying for it that I saw a new email ping up from my bank app. "Deposit received." I opened it and got as far as "Remaining balance."
100,083 pounds 12 pence. Before I was back on Zollertrade reading a notification. Congratulations. In recognition of your change in circumstances, your personal projection short sell has now been paid in full. We hope you invest again soon. Somehow, when I was pissed out my skull, I'd use the app to bet against myself and come out ahead.
It didn't make any sense, but when I checked with the bank, there it all was. Every penny. Obviously you hadn't worked out the bugs for this projection thing yet, but that's YOUR problem, not mine. It's not like I hacked it or anything. Still, I knew it was probably a fluke. Time to call it quits. Only that's the thing with money. It multiplies. Especially when you're good at finding loopholes.
Maybe I should have focused on how it worked, but the wheels were already turning. If by some bizarre twist this really was shorting against what? My own life. I could make bank. I just needed to nudge things in a bad direction and the payout would grow. And no, it wasn't fraud. I checked and there's no regulations about it or anything. So like I said, your app, your problem.
I started with a couple of small tests. Nothing huge. I bet a thousand quid, then picked a fight with the biggest stranger I could. Cost me a tooth, but 400 profit. A good return, but it didn't cover the dental bill to get it properly fixed. I tried again, this time betting 10k before renting a car with insurance and crashing it into a tree at speed. That messed my leg up pretty badly and I got a face full of glass, but I also got 50k profit. That was more like it.
I spent a few weeks breaking myself and sabotaging my life in various ways, and by the end I'd banked a cool mill. It was just so liberating, so addictive, literally cashing in my misery into cold, hard cash.
So as the sun set over the harbour, I opened the app again and dug straight through to the personal projection short selling box investment amount: £1,000,000. You only live once, right? Again, the little ping and the tick, and then it was time to go for a walk. I'd picked out the spot the day before. A cliff about an hour and a half's walk uphill near some old monastery or whatever called Notre Dame du Mai.
It had a decent view if you're into that kind of thing, but more importantly, it was high. Just high enough to really hurt me, not enough to kill me. Or so I hoped. On the way, I made a few phone calls. First to my parents, telling them that I never loved them and hoped they died horribly. Next, I was in the group chat with the lads, telling each of them just how many times I slept with their partners. Even when I hadn't.
Then it was on to my socials, publicly declaring my affiliation with every messed up ideology and psychopath I could find. I ran out of time before I could confess to robbing orphanages to buy drugs, but I think I made my point. Then I got to the cliff. It felt much taller standing at the top. There was a surprisingly chill wind blowing across the edge, driven upwards from the sea, and that coupled with the sheerness of the drop gave me a moment of vertigo. I hesitated.
Was this really worth it? I jumped. I woke up here at L'Hôpital Jean Marcel two days later. Apparently, I was in a medically induced coma since they found me. One leg was amputated and the other was full of pins. Cracked spine in two places. Ruptured spleen. Six broken ribs and a cracked skull. Every second hurts. But when I woke up, I couldn't be happier. I was alive, sure, but more than that, I was rich.
Properly rich. Untouchably rich. Everything was going to be okay. Everyone crowded me when I woke up, but I just kept demanding my phone until finally one of the nurses gave up and handed it over. I had about a thousand missed calls, but I skipped straight to Zorro Trader. I braced myself, looked down and there it was. Almost fifty million. But there was a tiny symbol to the left of the figure. A minus symbol.
And then I saw your notice. Your payment has been suspended due to suspicious account activity, including potential insider trading. Official bodies have been notified. Please repay your outstanding balance or prepare for personal adjustment. That was 12 hours ago and no matter what I do, I can't seem to get through to anybody. So yeah, I need my money.
I didn't do anything wrong. I just used the loophole, that's all. You can't blame me for playing the system. Besides, I've got nothing left. Nothing. So just give me my goddamn money! Oh, right. Darien Laurel. Account number 428813. Thank you. You are being transferred to our adjustments department. Hello?
Oh god, what? Nurse! Nurse! Coffee? Treadnought, I'm still catching up. Yeah, that'll happen when you turn up late and half-trollied. I don't know what you're talking about. Those cheeks don't lie. Either you're reading a particularly saucy case, or someone had a cheeky tipple before work.
There may have been some wine. Come on, then. How was it? Did your eyes meet across a crowded McDonald's? Or was it more of a creative, buckfast, under-a-bridge sort of situation? It was nice. Nice, he says. Is she at least going to make an honest woman out of you? Alice, look, I'm not really comfortable talking to you about this. Since when? It's just...
I get that you might not love the idea of me seeing Celia, but... I just think we should keep things a bit more... professional now, you know? Professional? Sorry, bad wording, um... but you know what I mean. No, you're right. I should probably stop getting tattoos of your face and return all your kidnapped pets. Alice... It's fine, I get it. I'll just find a way to soldier on somehow, despite this crushing blow.
Alice, wait. What? I just don't want things to get weird. Then you're in the wrong line of work? Yeah. I'm sorry. Yeah. Look, I'm happy you're happy. Thanks. But if you ever ask me to be professional again, I'm going to have to take a shit on your desk. That seems completely fair and reasonable. Hey. What? We spent most of the time discussing if they're real.
The cases. Sounds romantic. Mm-hmm. So what do you think? Are they? Does it matter? Yeah, kind of.
If we're working for the Men in Black or covering up ghosts or whatever, then shouldn't we go to the press or... Okay. A. You're drunk. B. You can't prove anything. And C. You signed the Official Secrets Act in your onboarding. And I know all your school friends say treasons bus in and fire, but it won't look good on your CV. Yeah, but look, Sam, you really want my opinion? Sober up and stop trying to make an impact.
Just do the job and take your pay. And what, just ignore what's going on right under my nose? Pretty much. Keep it professional. I'm sorry. It's okay when I say it. The Magnus Protocol is a podcast distributed by Rusty Quill and licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Non-Commercial Sharealike 4.0 international license. The series is created by Jonathan Sims and Alexander J. Newell and directed by Alexander J. Newell.
This episode was written by Alexander J. Newell and edited with additional materials by Jonathan Sims, with vocal edits by Nico Vitesi, soundscaping by Meg McKellar, and mastering by Catherine Rinella, with music by Sam Jones. It featured Billy Hindle as Alistair, Shahan Hamza as Samana Khalid, Anusha Battersby as Gwen Bouchard, Laurie-Anne Davis as Celia Ripley, Sarah Lambie as Lena Kelly.
The Magnus Protocol is produced by April Sumner, with executive producers Alexander J. Newell, Danny McDonough, Lynn C., and Samantha F.G. Hamilton, and associate producers Jordan L. Hawke, Taylor Michaels, Nicole Perlman, Cetius D. Raven, and Megan Nice.
To subscribe, view associated materials, or join our Patreon, visit RustyQuill.com. Rate and review us online, tweet us at TheRustyQuill, visit us on Facebook, or email us via mail at RustyQuill.com. Thanks for listening. To everyone else, this is a desk. But to you, it's a launch pad. You're starting blood. This ain't a desk. This is opportunity.
Oh, yeah.
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Hey, parents. Greenlight is here to take one big thing off your to-do list, teaching your kids about money. With a Greenlight debit card and money app of their own, kids and teens learn to earn, save, and invest. You can send money instantly, set flexible controls, and get real-time notifications of your kids' money activity. Set up chores and put allowance on autopilot to reward them for their hard work. Then, learn about the world of money together. Get one month free when you sign up at greenlight.com slash podcast.
Hi everyone, it's Anusha here, voice of Gwen in the Magnus Protocol. Today I'm here to advertise a very exciting back-kit crowdfund that we will be using to raise funds for the Magnus Protocol Mystery Board Game. We are working with the amazing and talented team from Indie Boards and Cards, the team behind some other extremely successful board games such as The Resistance, Coup, The Sherlock Files and
and Flashpoint Fire Rescue. The Magnus Protocol Mysteries will be an easy-to-learn puzzle game, bringing you a series of engaging cases to solve and supernatural problems to resolve. The game will also feature brand new audio recordings from the cast.
For more information, or to sign up to be notified of the launch of the crowdfund, go to www.rustyquill.com forward slash board game, where you can sign up for email updates. Or, for $1, you can also sign up for an early backer reward.