‘National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation’ With Bill Simmons, Chris Ryan, Sean Fennessey, and Van Lathan
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The Rewatchables is brought to you by The Ringer Podcast Network, where you can hear the big picture with Sean Fennessey. Julie was on. Yeah, Julie Roberts. How long did you have her? It's about 18 minutes, but it was honestly glorious. It was great? She was super cool. She Zoomed it up with you? She Zoomed it up. She made some jokes. She cursed a lot, which was fun. Yeah, she swears like a trucker. She kept it loose. It was nice. Van Lathan, higher learning. Yeah. Ringerverse, an emotional reunion.

With Charles Holmes. Oh my God, Charles moved to LA. He's now moved into LA. I took him to Hot Water Cornbread last week. He said that you've been showing him the sites, so to speak. Yeah, within a real... We have to go, because I have to take him deep downtown, like right outside the low bottoms. But first, it's like, yo, I want to connect you with the community. And like, we walked in, we brought Steve with us too. Steve looked around and he was like...

And then before you know it, Steve was literally giving back to the community. He was sharing food with black people at Hot Water Cornbread. I'm like, Steve, don't do too much now. I looked around and Steve was like sharing food. Like we wouldn't got food. I'm like, Steve, you don't have to, don't overdo it now. Have you noticed Vans quietly assembling a crew? It's a little like Tony Montana and Scarface. And I think I'm Frank. You're like, oh, don't worry. I think I'm Lucia. Hey, Tony. You're Lucia.

Pretty soon, I'm just going to be dead and he's going to be taking my bodyguard. You could be the Charlton Heston to Steve's Paul Newman at the March on Washington. You know, like a white ally with great fame and power. I'll try. CR, what are you up to? I actually, this is a great opportunity for me to announce that I'm now the new co-host of the Draymond Green Show. Oh my God.

We are going to spend the season re-watching National Lampoon's European Vacation to scout the next nationality that he wants to punch in the face. That sounds great. Good luck with that. My name is Phil Simmons. This is the Rewatchables. Worse? How could things get any worse? Look around you. We're at the threshold of hell. National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation is next.

I give you the Griswold Family Christmas Treat. Deck the halls as you desire. Hope you're not getting sap all over your sweater, Clark. White cat nibbling on a wire. Pine tree sap inside your nails. Sorry. And great gifts are on sale. Wouldn't be the Christmas shopping season if the stores were any less hooter than they are. Harder than they are. Chubby Chase. Wow!

National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, rated PG-13, starts Friday, December 1st at a theater near you. All right, see our favorite Christmas movie? Is this it? Well, when I'm talking to you, I just never know what we define as a Christmas movie, but this is very high up there. That's why I start with a dig. It's the holidays. It's Die Hard. It's my favorite Christmas movie. That's not a Christmas movie. There we go. Stop. Ridiculous. Get it rolling. That's ridiculous. Lubricate the pot. Do you think it's a Christmas movie, Die Hard? No.

Sean? Yeah, of course it is. We did this. That's right. So what's your actual Christmas movie favorite? Home Alone is my favorite Christmas movie. And I'm staring you right in the eyes. Just keep it moving. That's fine. Mount Rushmore, at least? Oh, for sure. This, Die Hard, Home Alone, and Four Christmases. What do you got, Sean? I mean, I have to say It's a Wonderful Life, right? That's my cliche, you know, movie from the 40s answer. Um...

I do love this movie. I grew up on Home Alone. Yeah. I was eight years old when Home Alone came out. So you can imagine the impact it had on me. I was like, I am Kevin McAllister. Yeah. That's a huge one for me. And those come back to back with the same writer. What do you have, Van? This is my favorite Christmas movie. I'm actually going to ask a question about It's a Wonderful Life in this podcast, which just dawned on me a couple of days. This is my favorite Christmas movie. There's really nothing that's a close second. My

My favorite bad Christmas movie, do you guys remember Surviving Christmas? Yeah. I love that movie. I think that's a good one. I like that. Yeah. So that's one that I watch all the time, but this is my favorite one. I think I like all Christmas movies to some degree. I even watched the Heather Graham Christmas movie. I think it was on Netflix with my wife. What was it that appealed to you about that one? Jason. Well, it was good to check in with Heather. Yeah. We have a long history together. Have you seen 12 Dates of Christmas with Amy Smart and Mark Paul Gosselaar? Pfft.

I haven't, but it's on my agenda right now. Check it out. How is it? You know what? It's not bad. It's not bad. All the holiday movies, first of all, it makes you feel like, oh, it's officially... The first thing that happens with Christmas and the holidays is when you're watching football and they drop the first holiday commercial, which gets earlier every year. I think this year was like first week in November. They were just banging them out. But then you start seeing the ads for the Hallmark movies and the Lifetime movies, and then...

At some point on the streamers now, you see they'll start popping them on. You see Elf. Elf is up there for me. Me too. But Christmas Vacation is my favorite. And I think it's always been like immediately sought in the theater. It was the last kind of part of the Chevy Chase run that he had in the 80s, which we'll talk about. But this was immediately good. It was immediately satisfying. Cousin Eddie showing up, pushed it over the top.

And then for 35 years now, 34 years, it's just been super reliable. It's also crisp, man. It's like, what, 96 minutes? Yeah. It's over and you're like, man, I could have used three more scenes. They just raced through it. Doesn't waste any breath either. That's what I love about...

the National Lampoon's movies. It's some sort of joke in every scene. Either he's pushing it forward with his sarcastic brand of observational comedy, or there's physical comedy, or there's some slapstick deal happening right on the screen. So the movie is very brisk, but it feels like you get a lot out of it for that 90. Exactly.

I agree. It's kind of a weirdly emotional movie, though. It is. I feel like this is the most sincere vacation movie. Yeah. It's kind of the most absurd one in some ways, too. Yeah. Yeah. Absurd and sincere. Yeah. Chris Ryan, The Ringer. Well, being stuck at the house means that they're not on a quest. Yeah. So you don't really know what we're pushing towards other than just Christmas Day. Yeah. So they have to...

infuse it with like more feeling and like, and less like episodic, you know, like the first two movies are so episodic. They're so like, first we stop here, then we stop here, then we stop here. This is like, does it start on like December 14th? Yeah. When they go get the tree. And something else, the other movies, he's so,

He almost at some point becomes unrelatable because he's like this vacation dictator and nothing else matters. Obviously, that's coming from some trauma or something from his childhood. But in this movie, it's very direct because there's a scene where he laments his childhood and where you can tell what he's reaching for. It's very accessible, like why he's doing all of this.

I told this story on the vacation rewatchables, but my dad's brother Greg, we used to call his family the Griswolds and they would go out of their way to go on these vacations and stuff. But Clark, I think the two things he really believes in is family and family being together, then the holidays, which is totally relatable and of course,

The funniest thing about this movie is like the holidays usually suck and you're stuck with a bunch of people you don't really want to see or talk to. And this movie hits that kind of the best. Yeah. When the parents show up, they're fighting outside the front door right away. Then the uncle shows up.

And then cousin Eddie obviously shows up and then you just get all thrown together and you just kind of have to make it work. I don't know. It becomes survival. How much time do you spend thinking about like Clark Griswold as a character with continuity? Cause I kind of liked the idea that he's arrived at Christmas vacation and maybe life hasn't exactly turned out the way he wanted. You know, he's like, I'm still at this job after 17 years.

My kids somehow never get any older, you know? Yeah. My kids are getting younger. My kids are Benjamin Button. Yeah. These yuppies moved in next door. They've got all this money, you know, like I, you know, my boss is Ned Beatty and network and I can't get this bonus. It's kind of like a, it's kind of a dark movie sometimes when you watch it that way. End of the eighties. Yeah.

It seems like he just wants one thing to go right. Yes. Can I just get my fucking Christmas lights to come on? Can I just get you guys to just have the family Christmas with me? And it's almost like this weird commentary on the middle management wasteland that so many Americans were living in during that time. People that like...

we're disqualified from the rat race. Yeah. All I want is Christmas to go right and it still won't go right. My boss won't give me the bonus and all of that shit. That's the John Hughes wheelhouse. That's what I was going to say is I think that it's easy to forget that the movie is actually kind of a movie of ideas and like real themes about real people because Chevy's in it and doing so much Chevy stuff. And he's such a zany comic actor. But,

But John Hughes writes sincerely about the way that middle class people live in America. That's his whole thing. Planes, Trains, Did That, you know, same kind of themes. I just want to get back to my family. I just want to get there. I just want to celebrate the holidays. And the same kind of people. I don't even know who I really like that much. And the Steve Martin character is not so far away from where the Clark Griswold character is in Christmas Vacation, too. Boy, that Planes, Trains ending is still a nut kick, boy.

that's some really, really getting to you. You're well enough right now. I am. I'm so near tears. Have we done planes? Yeah, we did. We did it. You've COVID brain. We've talked about this. Was I on that one? I feel like I was on that one. You might've been. I feel like I was on that one. We're getting to the phase of the show now where we've forgotten the movies that we've done. I was watching Terminator. I don't think I was on planes. I think you were. I don't think I was. I was watching Terminator 2 and I emailed Chris and Van saying how

the first 35 minutes of terminator 2 might be the best 35 minutes to start a movie ever and had forgotten that the three of us had done terminators how have we not done this like bill needs to be put in a home we'll be like you checked out heat kind of an underrated 90s crime movie let me know we could almost do that one multiple times yeah chevy

83, Vacation. Best defense with Eddie Murphy. 85, Fletch, European Vacation, Spies Like Us. 86, Three Amigos. 88, Funny Farm. 89, Fletch Lives, which I still don't support. And then 89, Christmas Vacation. So he bangs out nine movies in seven years. I think all of them did really well. This is kind of the end of the road for him. Funny Farm didn't, right? I love Funny Farm. I love it too. I love it too. It kind of ties into research where it's like he wanted George Rory Hill to direct this. And they were like, well, no.

Another movie where I think it's a little bit misunderstood because it has a zany poster of Chevy Chase looking goofy and they think it's one kind of a movie. But when you watch the movie, it's actually a little more sophisticated than that. A little more interesting. Yeah, he's, I mean, he's psych gags for how many years in a row here. Even when he goes in the attic, which is one of the best scenes in this movie. And it's like, all right, he's gonna step on that piece of wood. It's like old school Buster Keaton pratfall stuff. Who does this now?

Physical comedy is not super popular. I think it's gone, man. I was thinking about that. I feel like Will Ferrell could have gone this way, but then just wanted no part of it. I feel like the dude-perfect, jackass era of stunt stuff kind of obviated the need for our big movie stars to do it. Yeah, all my homies. I mean...

Jackass is great. We should just do a Jackass rewatchables. Also, watching somebody get tased in the nuts for real is just different. It's different. I want to love the ballet of Chevy on the ladder, but I actually do like seeing people willingly be shot with riot shotguns. Just get smacked in the face with a giant oversized hand. I'm into that. What's the right age to show your son

all the jackass movies. I have to tell you, Bill, that I have a feeling that if Ben hasn't already seen it, like he's seen something equivalent to it on TikTok or YouTube. Yeah. I was going to say the answer is five years old. That's when we started watching them. That's when we banged out all the jackass movies. So once again, I'm not a great father.

written by John Hughes during this incredible John Hughes stretch that we've covered over and over again. This is a 10 year run culminating in home alone, which becomes one of the most successful movies of all time.

Directed by Jeremiah Chechik. Jeremiah Chechik, yeah. Jeremiah Chechik. Any thoughts on his IMDb, Sean? We were preparing for this. A curious career. Yeah. Never made a movie like this again. No. He shortly thereafter made the remake of Clouseau's Diabolique with Sharon Stone and Isabella Gianni. A fave. A fave.

That didn't work. I think Chaz Palminteri was the male lead. I like that. Certainly he did. I support all the shared skills franchise. I mean, I was watching Basic Instinct 2 the other night. I feel like I just have to support the franchise. He made Benny and June in the Johnny Depp movie. Which was a beloved movie by the white girls in high school. Is that true? Jesus Christ. I think you might have known more about white girls than I did in high school. Probably so. It's tough. Life could have went a different way, Sean.

Well, I'm married to one now, so it's okay. It worked out. And Bronx is Burning, the ESPN miniseries he directed. With Totoro. Oh, wow. And Oliver Platt. God, they were making that as it was airing. We were wondering if you had any thoughts on that one. I just remember that was right when I was getting involved in ESPN content and they ordered like eight episodes of it and the schedule was kind of condensed and they were like finishing stuff as they were filming. Oh, yeah. It was pretty hairy. Wouldn't say he has a...

auteur point of view this movie's pretty well done though it's pretty it's pretty solid the biggest thing i learned in the research from a movie i can't i've watched this at least once a year i think i don't know how many times total but every year i watch this run how this in the research they said this movie may have inspired what we see now in la and i'm sure in other cities but especially here the christmas lights on the houses how over the top it is

I include my house right now. They said nobody really had kind of put the pieces together until this movie. I don't know if I believe that, but I also can't. Seems unlikely. Do you do your own light hanging? Of course not. I can't even freaking brush my teeth. What are you talking about? So what's your, this is very interesting. What's, what, what's your job then? Are you like,

The director of lights? Are you... This is my wife's domain. My job is to walk outside the house and say, that looked great. I see. I didn't want to see you... Maybe like a Mike Greenwell or Ellis Burks jersey on and you're up in the fucking ladder. With the old red side. No, that is not.

That's not me. That was my stepdad, though. Yeah. My stepdad was kind of the... There's just certain people who have the Clark Griswold in them. I'm doing this myself. I'm going to go get there. I'm going to look at the tree. Our friend Zach is like this. Yes. My wife is like this. We've considered a Santa, inflatable Santa for the roof kind of thing. Cool.

Some people, I mean, it's part of, work is the part of Christmas, right? Like, I never wanted to work, ever. So, like, going out Christmas shopping, hassle. Lights, hassle. Tree, hassle. Hassle, hassle, hassle. I would much rather drive through Candy Cane Lane and look at other people's stuff than, like, pull it up from my own side. And then go home to an unlit...

- Somber condo. - Like a somber condo, no Christmas. All I do for Christmas, put the dog in a hat. - So you're Todd and Margo. - Yep. - Yeah. - I'm definitely Todd and Margo. I connected with them so much. I even run in a sauna suit. No bullshit. I run around the neighborhood in a sauna suit. - You're a late 80s yuppie. - A little bit. I'm looking a little fluffy. I need to pull a little sweat. I run around the neighborhood in a sauna suit. I'm them way more than I am the Griswold. - Where do you stand on fake trees, people?

Well, I want to talk about this. We just had a conversation about this. So, you know, my dad is a little bit of a Clark Griswold, too. Puts up the lights all by himself. Vacations in the car, all that stuff. And he called me last year and he's we're FaceTiming and he shows me the tree. He shows me the Christmas tree every year at his house. I was like, oh, wow, looks amazing. It looked really good. It looked too good. Yeah. And I was like.

is that, dad, is that a fake tree? And he's like, yes, it is. And I was like, dad, you raised me to be a real tree man. I've been buying real trees in my home for the last 15 years. You betrayed me. Real tree man and real stick man. I'm sure you did not train me to do that.

But he's made a total change. And now he's like the Bernie Sanders of fake trees. He's like, fake trees are the only way to go. Universal fake trees for everyone. What's his rationale? He's like, no needles. Needles are death in the house. And if you drop the needles and the cleanup is a fucking hassle. And this was the first year where I got a real tree again this year. And I was like...

This is a mistake. I need a fake tree. So the argument I have for fake trees, which I do not have, I have a Douglas fir or whatever the hell we got this year. Yeah. But I want to introduce an idea that Christmas next day, turn off the tree. You know, you just turn it off. Go through New Year's. You're socially exhausted. Go through the first week of January. Get back to work.

That weekend, second Christmas. And you fucking flick the lights back on. Oh, there you go. And everybody is back. And then we have second Christmas parties just to get us through the first month of 2024 where everybody's depressed.

But don't do dry January. Do dry February. You know, like, one more holiday party to get us kicked into 2024. Do we do gifts again? What? Do we do gifts again? I don't know. Honestly, it could just be, like, a holiday party. Because I'm fucking with this. I'm fucking with second grade. Because there's no, like, real reason to hang out in the first couple months of the year. Could it be Super Bowl weekend? Where it's, like, just everything...

As you know, one of my goals in life is to make Super Bowl weekend into a national holiday. Yeah, much more of an event. And everybody gets Monday off.

I like that. Yeah. Look, maybe we can bring together our two philosophies here. Do you have anyone in your life that never gets rid of the tree after Christmas? I've had trees that were clearly rotting. Decrepit. Yeah. And my wife was still like, there's still some, we got a couple more days in here. And it's like, that smell is weird. Like, that smell is dying sap. Yeah. My dad and my stepmom are legendary.

for waiting too long to get rid of their tree. And there was one time when I went back to visit right around the Celtics playoffs and the tree was still up. It was April. And I was like, did she say, my dad's like, yeah, we haven't gotten around to them. Like you're retired. What are you talking about? Is it laziness or the not willing to let go of the season?

It seems like just we'll get to it and then you never get to it. Same reason my dad still doesn't have Netflix since he got bounced off my account. Just won't sign up for it and then complains about how he doesn't have Netflix. You can tell though, like those trees become like basically tinder boxes the longer they live. Like this is just a pure accelerant in my head. It's a fire hazard. Also, I think the tree is like insufferable.

instant happiness though man people the tree is so symbolic yeah my mother and my grandmother put all kinds of weird stuff on the tree like african spiritualist stuff and different onks and all that type of shit hanging from the tree and they leave it up for too long but it's because it just means a happy time and people can't let go of this shit man it's a vicious circle the more you get invested in christmas the harder it is to let it go yeah that's why christmas symbolizes life

It symbolizes death, actually. You go get the tree, there's presents, and then at the end you're thrown out. Right. Yeah. Jesus Christ. Let's talk about Jesus. The reason for the season. That's what it's really about. I didn't want to get into that, but we can. It's a game changer with kids. This is really the first Christmas that I'm having with a kid. Oh, yeah. And it's...

Two to nine. It's still there. It's still the wonder because I'm not around kids anymore. No, it's amazing. They believe it's amazing. Santa Claus, Elf and the... We were doing parent corners on Elf and the Shelf, me and Sal, for years because my stupid kids believed the elf was moving every day and if it didn't, they were in trouble. And then they turn 10 and they're like,

I can't believe I fell for that shit. Yeah. It basically becomes the attitude. We got to bring Sean's daughter a present the other day and I did vicariously realize like, oh my God, this present is like three quarters the size of this child. And they were like, oh,

Yeah. Really, the wonder of the season is pretty amazing. Christmas and Halloween are two of the best reasons to have kids. Another good reason is when you get older, they take care of you right before you die. But those Christmas and Halloween. See, I have to have kids, and I'll tell you why. Because I'm too cerebral about all of this now. I only get Christmas gifts for the nieces and nephews every other year.

It's just too many of them. These motherfuckers are not going to break me every year. I don't even get shit from them. You have a big family? Yeah. I get nothing back from... Well, you got to take care of your crew, too, for when you did the Ringer crew. That's true. You got to get Steve's gift. You almost have everybody else's gift. Steve gives a lot of gifts. I don't get any. You got Lindbergh's gift? No, I should. Is it because he's white? Wow, look at that. Is Lindbergh in the crew? Jesus. Ben has numbers. How about this? How about this? We have a meeting about this later. It's going to be like Christmas.

Me and Lindbergh took literally, we left a screening. I'll tell you how Lindbergh got initiated into the crew. We left a screening in New York and we took a nighttime stroll through Central Park. Well, he's a night owl. Ben doesn't go to sleep. We took a nighttime stroll. He's weirdly jacked. Ben's diesel and doesn't sleep.

The ringer oral history would be like the 12th part of just a limber. He's also been deferring his salary since 2011. So do you believe that this movie inspired the Christmas light boom? I'm willing to believe it, but I don't know if it's true. I think that the run of...

Die hard home alone in this like maybe I could I could see a connection between that and like the modern like obsession with Adore like you almost want to be Christmas movie culture. So I was a little kid before this movie came out and I vividly remember Me and my siblings piling into the car to go drive to the neighborhoods where they really did up the lights So I have to assume that this didn't maybe it inspired it even more but I was happening well I mean I was in college when this movie came out, but when I was a kid I

I mean, the Christmas movie boom hadn't happened. So all the Christmas movies were like, It's a Wonderful Life and shit that was made way before I was born. And my dad's family would always be like, oh, we gotta watch. And I was always like, these...

Movies kind of suck. Where are the movies for me? And then all of a sudden, we just started making them. I mean, you could say this and Home Alone just start and maybe Die Hard. You know what I forgot to mention that I love is Black Christmas, the slasher movie. That's one of the great Christmas movies. I kind of liked the remake of that too.

There have been two. Which one? The one with... The recent one? It was one like 2006. Is Imogen Poots in one of them? That was a month, a few years ago. I like that one. I like a horror movie. Where do you guys stand on the battle between This Christmas and Almost Christmas that splits up the African-American community? Explain it to us. Okay, so This Christmas is a movie with Chris Brown.

Lauren London, Idris Elba. - I like Lauren London. - Okay, "Almost Christmas" is a movie that stars Gabrielle Union, Omar Epps, Danny Glover, Monique. It's a Will Packer production. - That's the one I'm familiar with. - Right. That one to me is better, but I wanna get, I like to start-- - Is the former a Malcolm Lee movie?

I can't remember. So is this like a LeBron versus Michael Jordan type of argument? I don't think Malcolm did either one of them. Because there was all kinds of problems. I feel like The Best Man Holiday is the best one of the Black Christmas movies. The Best Man Holiday is fucking great. It's tight right there. I love The Best Man Holiday. That's kind of like a cheat code though because you're taking all the people with The Best Man and all of that stuff. The Best Man Holiday is good. It's really good. What about Tyler Perry comes down the chimney? What?

Is that also a horror movie? Madea's got a Christmas movie, doesn't she? I don't know. I'm sure Madea's got a Christmas movie. I told you, Tyler's cooking right now, man. Tyler's cooking. Tyler saw the Netflix data and he's like, Tyler is running. He's got his own network. All them shows are hidden, man. What did you think of the Christmas scene in Oppenheimer? Which episode is that? Is that episode three? Ep three? Oh.

I still haven't seen Barbie, Sean. Take your time. This movie had a $25.5 million budget. It made $73.3 million. So now you're just doing all box office returns in that voice. Tripled the budget. Yeah, it's good. Roger Ebert, two stars. Damn, Raj. Raj isn't really ending the year well. Raj the Grinch. It's not his fault. You know what? It's a hard time for film critics. They're really busy.

Yeah, all these top 10 lists. He said, the movie is curious in how close it comes to delivering on its material. Sequence after sequence seems to contain all the necessary material to be well on the way toward a payoff, and then it somehow doesn't work. Fuck you, Raj. I completely disagree. Okay, let me just ask, am I alone in thinking this is

it goes, this is the third best vacation. Wrong. I disagree. Oh, I have it second. So you guys don't like Europe? I think it's the best one. European you think is the best one? No, no, no, not European. I think this one is the best one. And then National Lampoon. I love European, but I think it doesn't compare to the other two as well. I like European a lot. I think it might be my second. I actually think Vegas is ahead of European. Wow. Wow.

man. They did. It's not. They were just like, people love cousin Eddie. He's let's run some ISOs and just to have, there's an elite Ethan Embry performance in Vegas. I actually like Vegas. I would like Vegas vacation more than Euro. Also, I'm a gambling guy, you know, I'm gambling again.

My biggest... Sean likes all Vegas movies. My biggest issue with Euro is how bad Rusty is. He sucks. Rusty just... Yeah, he's bad. It's Sofia Coppola Godfather 3 level bad. She just caught it straight for no reason. She's bad. She's bad, but...

What are you talking about? She was horrible in that movie. Who is it? It's Jason Lively. Jason Lively. Yeah. Not a lot of IMDb. Do you think it's just the right place, right time when you saw a thing for you? I think it led to a sexual awakening. I was just going to say, that's the thing for me. I knew we were going to get that. It was one of the first PG-13 movies. But it was like, it was weird sexual undertones, the breasts and all of this stuff. That's what I remember about the movie. It's horny. It's an Amy Heckerling movie. I think it's got a lot of pizzazz.

Alright. Not for me. CR. Can you save it for Byron Mayo later? Sean, which is... I've never... Wait a minute. Have I heard horny CR before? Yeah, he's in the form of Byron Mayo. It's been a heartbreaking emerging character. New part of the persona. We'll do it later. I'm into it. Have you seen Officer and a Gentleman? Yeah. Okay.

You know when Robert Loggia reveals his lower torso in the first 10 minutes of the movie? Big inspiration for Chris. Byron Mayo has taken over Wayne Jenkins this 2020. We're going to take a break and do rewatchable scenes.

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Slash rewatch $45 upfront payment required equivalent to $15 a month for first three month plan only speed slower above 40 GB on unlimited plan. Additional taxes, fees, and restrictions apply. See mint mobile for details. All right. Rewatch. We'll see an opening. Basically the opening scene, Clark gets tailgated and buys a tree. There's a lot going on here. Um, you ever tried that going under the truck move?

It's hard. Especially in that car. Does that mean you have? I've thought about it. Sometimes you drive by a truck, you're like, could I just fly through there? What the fuck are you talking about? I can kind of see him in his car listening to NBA radio. You're listening to Justin and Eddie. You're thinking about calling in. You know?

I like when the wife says, Clark, I don't want to spend the holidays dead. Just dropping off lines left and right. I like frozen Audrey when they actually get to the trees. I like when he says, there's three of the thimble of the Grithwald family because his tongue's frozen. And I'm going to give that the Den of Thieves Benihana award scene stealing location as well. I like all the trees. How good did you see all those?

But that scene is what I'm talking about, though. Think of all the fun. Yeah, there's 20 funny things in that. There's 20 funny things that happen. And even the last scene, they don't let you get off without kicking you in your nuts with a little bit more funny. Dad, did you bring a saw? Something else, huh, Russ? Yeah, Dad. Isn't it beaut, Audrey? She'll see it later, honey. Her eyes are frozen. Most enduring traditions of the season are best enjoyed in the warm embrace of Kith and Kin. The three are the symbol of the spirit of the Grithwald family Christmas. Dad, I...

Did you bring a saw? And then they've uprooted the fucking tree out of it. It's just hilarious. It's an unanswerable question there. How did they get the goddamn tree? Frozen? Yeah. Don't give me an unanswerable question in the first three minutes of the movie. Right. Well, the tree also changes sizes a couple times. The tree they're getting, there's no way that fits. It's bigger than his entire house. But that's fine. It's a Christmas comedy movie. The parents show up.

the chaos of that scene when the parents one guy says they took a pint of fluid out of my back and then the next parent's like you see this mole and it's just like classic old people shit

Merry Christmas. Oh, Mom. Knock on the door. You promised. You promised. You promised. You know, they took a pint of fluid out of my lower back. You see this mole? This mole on my neck? You think it's changing color? No. Well, you keep touching it, it's getting redder. I've got hemorrhoids. Can you believe that? Oh, my. Isn't that terrible? You're not getting a garage space. I'm doing the parking.

What age does that happen? 70s. Really? Yeah. You come over here, baby, come over here and look at this. What, what, what, what, what my mom got on her thigh? I'm like, I don't fucking want to know. I love you to death. I'm like, what age did they start doing that? 70s. You think this is melanoma? What, what do I look like? I talk about Marvel movies for a minute. You look like an oncologist. Yeah. You think Biden does that now? God, no. No,

No, but Biden's old, where he's just, he's in the White House. He's like, what is that? Hunter, come in here. Come in, chief of staff. Come on in here. Clark shows off the Christmas lights. They don't work. 250 strands of lights. 100 individual bulbs per strand for a grand total of 25,000 imported Italian Foucault lights.

25,000. I hope nobody I know drives by and sees me standing in the yard staring at the house in my pajamas. If they know you're dad, they won't think anything of it. Fire it up, dad! I dedicate this house to the Griswold family Christmas. Drumroll, please. Drumroll. Oh, oh, uh...

And then he thinks they're going to work. This is the drum roll, please. And they just never work. Chevy Chase is the funniest. Shit's not going right for me right now. And I'm trying to save it. Actor. Would you put him and Will Ferrell in the finals? Those are both good ones. I was thinking about... It's a talent that nobody under 40 has anymore.

Steve Martin did this too. He was good. In Parenthood, he's really good at that. Anybody under 40. Sandler could do it sometimes. Sandler's a little over the top though. He has rage. Yeah, right. He did the rage version of it. Billy Madison and stuff. Anybody under 40 would... You have to be a physical comedian to be part of it. I like Vince Vaughn doing this too. I was thinking about this in recasting.

There isn't a Chevy Chase right now. And there hasn't been for a long time. Like a guy who delivers like that. Like those guys are kind of gone, right? I think it has to be somebody that had, like he had like crazy sketch comedy background in front of audiences, right? He's in Groundlings and the Second City, all that stuff. And,

I think you have to, you learn when you're on stage every night, you learn this physical version of comedy that I just don't know if people do anymore. It's a pretty amazing combination of that, the physical stuff and then like the constant ad lib seeming smart ass remarks. Yeah. A lot of, a lot of sap in here.

Plus he's 6'2 and handsome. That's the thing. That was the thing. He was like, I'm going to evolve or devolve depending on how you see him, Cary Grant. It's like, how can a guy this handsome be this funny while surrounded by all these people who are shorter than him, less beautiful than him? But this is, you mentioned this, this is the end. This is the

this is the last big movie that he started it's a 15-year run which is a long time because the first season snl is in 75 and he basically runs that all the way through to 89 which is

And he was late when he got started. I think he was like 31, 32 on SNL. So it's about as long of a run as you're going to have because at some point you got to do the Bill Murray thing and reinvent yourself as a dramatic actor and find Wes Anderson. Right, right. He never really did that. It's kind of what Will Ferrell's trying to do now. Memoirs of an Invisible Man. And then there was like a truly beloved bizarre movie. Remember Nothing But Trouble? Yeah. Right after this. Right after this. And then that was kind of cool.

a couple years after that. But that bombed. I love that movie. I love the movie, but it's so bad though. It's so bad and weird and off. Like, it's just an odd movie. There's like four characters playing multiple, four actors playing multiple characters in that movie. Major Dan Aykroyd check in that movie. And candy. Well, that candy's good. This is a weird time for comedy and I think part of it is the cocaine is starting to wear off.

when you get to this, but this is when 48 hours two happens, which I'm still mad about. Yeah. This is everyone to do an angry rewatchables of the middle of 48 hours to another 48 hours. Plump Eddie Murphy. I kind of like it. I'm just saying the biker gang. I kind of like, listen, I'm not saying I haven't watched it 60 times. It just makes me mad. It's like a, it's an angry watch for me. You have those movies where you're just like, God damn it. Why didn't you get this right? You had all this.

Also, there are new guys coming at this point. Those guys are like, I mean, obviously some other guys. New comedy guys. New comedy guys are coming around at this point and they're kind of seeding it. Yeah, it's volume one of the SNL crew is kind of winded down. Right, right. We're on the precipice of like Mike Myers and all those guys coming. Yeah, Jim Carrey. Dana Carvey's already there. Dana Carvey, guys like that. The funniest man ever, Phil Hartman, is in the mix. Yeah, RIP. Phil Hartman was a little Chevy Chase guy.

in a way, a little bit more of a performer. Did more characters. This is where Machine Gun Kelly kept who he called an imprisoned parlance's bitch. Everyone here calls me Vicky. Okay, so there's four guys right in this time. It's Steve Martin, it's Bill Murray, it's Chevy, and it's Eddie Murphy. Mm-hmm.

It's a real who you got. But Eddie never did physical comedy like this. Robin, too. Maybe Robin. But just in terms of movie stars, comedy male movie stars in the 80s.

Like, the 90s, Robin Williams becomes actually a much bigger movie star. Well, and then Jim Carrey takes the physical. He basically takes the Chevy Chase torch. And, like, Ben Stiller comes along. Like, a lot of people come along. Adam Sandler. Adam Sandler. Wilson. But, like, those four guys pretty much define the decade for comedy movies. Yep. For sure. With Bill Murray. Is your question, which one is your favorite? Who's your guy? I know Eddie is your guy, right? That's your number one? That's my eternal guy. Are you basing this on the actual movies they made or on their persona? I think both. I think they're...

all distinct and cool and interesting. I think I like Bill Murray's movies more and I think I like Chevy Chase as like his style of comedy. God damn it, that's a really tough call. I think Chevy Chase has a better library, honestly. If you're stuck with 10, if you had to take 10 DVDs to a desert island. Oh, I'd take Bill Murray. I'm saying from this, go see Mayor Stretch. Bill Murray is...

But from 75 to 90, I think Chevy has a better library. And then I think Murray catches up to him. What years? What about Bob? That's after 90. After 90. Yeah, 91. Yeah. Because Chevy, I saw it, seems like old times and foul play. Plus all the stuff. Well, that's what's interesting about it, right? Because Bill Murray was there to fill in for Chevy after he leaves in some ways. He's filling the gap on SNL. Yeah.

But then it takes 10 years for Murray to basically succeed him as the male movie star of that time, too. You know, it's interesting when you think about it. Number one, I'll say one thing about Seems Like Old Times. That, to me, was the version of the career that Chevy Chase, like, could have had. Because that's Chevy Chase, to me, at his best.

Chevy Chase. It's an all-timer for me. I can't believe we haven't done it yet. Which one? Seems like old times. He's got all the things that you're talking about. He's a leading man. He's a leading man. He's handsome. He's suave. He's funny. All of that stuff. But I will say, you know, Bill Murray, Ghostbusters is like 1984, right? That's the biggest fucking movie in the world. But Chevy...

In the 80s, I think Chevy has a more consistent run. Totally agree. But in the 90s, then Bill Murray is like firing on all cylinders. He's like a kingpin and he's, you know, yeah.

I loved Goldie Hawn. I just want you to know that. She is adorable. That's a really, really beautiful... Of all the things that have been remade, I can't believe nobody's tried to fuck that one up. Should we do Goldie Hawn month? Wildcats? Well, Sean's shat on Private Benjamin. That's not what I said. I said no one under 35 has seen it. Yeah. And I confirmed. I looked it up that night after you said that. Private Benjamin was a bigger movie that made more money than Full Metal Jacket. I just looked at all the numbers. It was like the sixth biggest movie in 1980. But when the movie was released...

No one under 35 was alive. They made a TV show about it. It was so... It became such a phenomenon. Did you just say it's bigger than Full Metal Jacket? Obviously, it's bigger than Full Metal Jacket. No. These guys said Full Metal Jacket was the biggest... No, the conversation was about what is the best... It was Apex Mountain. Basic training. Yes.

And we said Apex Mountain for basic training. Well, the best is Full Metal Jacket. That was what we were talking about. But Full Metal Jacket wasn't successful when it came out. But it has become one of the great movies of all time watched by all these dorks. But that's not the context of Apex Mountain. You're the one who

the one who invented it? Yeah, and I'm telling you. This is like fucking playing basketball and finding out traveling is legal, right? Listen, you gotta bend your own rules. When it came out, it was that Apex Fountain. It eventually became the best. Okay. So Private Benjamin next week. So Goldie Hawn month. No, we're definitely not doing Private Benjamin. We will do Full Metal Jacket. Before we stop the feed, can we do Wildcats? Oh, with Woody and Wesley? Yeah, I love that movie.

How many Goldie Hawn movies have been done on the rewatch? None. Zero. We've never had the Goldie Hawn conversation. Well, Shampoo is one we got to do at some point. Shampoo? That's great. Shampoo's amazing. Overboard? I was just going to say Overboard. People love Overboard. Overboard, man. Overboard's classic. I love Goldie Hawn.

What's a adorable woman in Hollywood history? Next rewatchable scene. I forgot we were doing that. This has been a good one. Yeah. We're veering. The lights finally go on and off and on and off. Love it. And finally go on.

There's so many good moments in this. The garage extension cord that has 20 things plugged into it is so good. That is fucking iconic. It's so good. You just, everybody had that one weird part of the house where your dad had plugged in 62 things into one Kmart extension cord. Yeah.

It's so good. And then he'll be like, you have to unplug that to plug that in. We just won't use the TV for an hour. I love when Clark's emotional when it goes on. He says to his dad, thanks, Dad. You taught me everything I know about exterior illumination. Eddie just shows up in the middle of it. It's already a really good scene. And all of a sudden, Eddie's there. He's like, hey, Eddie. And he's like, Eddie? And there's this...

SUV and he goes through his family and they look at the daughter. They're like, hey, what happened with Ruby Sue? It's like funniest thing. Her eyes aren't crossed anymore. And he goes, ah, she falls in a well. Eyes get crossed. Gets kicked by a mule and they uncross. You remember Ruby Sue? Oh, yeah. Oh, my gosh.

Her eyes aren't crossed anymore. That's something, ain't it? She falls in a well, eyes go cross, she gets kicked by a mule, they go back to normal. I don't know. And this here's our pride and joy, Snots. Pretty name, Ed. Yeah, we named him that because he's got the sinus condition. Snots, you roll over and let Uncle Clark scratch your belly. You ain't never seen a set on a dog like this one, Scott Clark.

That's okay, Eddie. That's something, ain't it?

And that's the thing about Eddie. Like, they're so, he's so disgusting. The dog has a sinus condition. Yeah, snot. Rocky has a lip fungus. You might not want to do that. Everything is a joke. He's got a lip fungus they haven't identified yet. Eddie is all time in this. I like when he talks about snot. He's got a set of balls on him. Drink a can of Penzolidol. I like when they're walking through the supermarket.

And Eddie's just loading up the car with stuff. It's just like, it's such a funny bit. And he just keeps putting Purina on the... He's just pointing at things and knowing that he's not paying. But he's just pointing at things and he's putting them in there. I love it. It's all Chet doing spit takes watching him put the dog food into his face the whole time. Next one I had was Clark and Eddie hanging out in the living room when Clark's wearing that... I mean, Eddie's wearing... It's like a V-neck, but he also has a turtleneck. Yeah.

And he's telling them about how the dog will hump his leg every once in a while. He goes, it's best that you let him finish. Snots. And then Clark says, can I refill your eggnog for you? Get you something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead? The sledding scene is the dumbest scene in the movie. Non-keloid, silicon-based kitchen lubricant sledding. Yeah.

I still like it. Is that what you were using during European vacation? Oh! It's best if you just let me finish. Just let him finish! It's nuts. Oh, Christ. Eddie admits the metal plate in his head, it was replaced because every time Catherine revved up the microwave, I'd piss my pants.

They had to replace it with plastic? Oh, shit. So it's not going to look right. If it gets done, it... Does Eddie... Is Eddie an even better character now that we know that Randy Quaid is a real fruitcake? So I was going to ask, does Randy Quaid being a lunatic hurt... Does Randy Quaid becoming Eddie in real life hurt Eddie? Yeah, I kind of wish I didn't know all the Randy Quaid stuff. It's like the most...

predictable thing. Yeah. It feels like, you know what I mean? Yeah, that he actually became that. It seems almost meta. Yeah. But I love Randy Quaid, man. Clark and Eddie go shopping. You mentioned this. I like when he goes, how's the live, how's the live bait business, Eddie? That's apparently Eddie's business, live bait. And then he talks about how he lost his money and how,

If only we had the money we sent the preacher who was screwing the hockey player. It's not even explained. I don't know. What about his kids? All his kids can fend for themselves. Your kids? Your kids, Eddie. Christmas Eve dinner with the overcooked turkey. Sorry. Why are you crying? I told you we put it in too early. It's just a little dry. It's fine. I told you. Here's the heart.

Is that your Big Kahuna Burger award for best use of food and drink? Or would you go ahead and slurp in the eggnog? We put it in too early. Oh, there's the heart. The heart. And then they're chewing on the goddamn turkey for the rest of the day. And the cat shit and the jollo. I also like when they're at the table and Clark's saying, I saw a sled last night. I think it was Santa Claus to the kids. And Eddie goes, you serious, Clark?

And then Clark doesn't get his bonus. That's when he slurps the egg, the egg noggin. And he has this crazy monologue, which we'll just play. It's good. Hey, any of you are looking for any last minute gift ideas for me? I have one. I like Frank Shirley, my boss right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people. And I want him brought right here. Big ribbon on his head.

And then Clark's kidnapped boss shows up.

And last. What do you have for your favorite scene, Sean? I love the meltdown. I love the don't get the bonus meltdown. That's like the best performance of... That's like Chevy Chase's best movie moment. Do you think he's ad-libbing some of that? Or is it like an actual scripted ad? So they say that he ad-libbed it, but then there was also a rumor that people on the other side of the shot were holding...

cue cards that only had like brainless, dickless, hopeless so that he knew there were words to say, but that it was mostly him. That was good. What a performance. Amazing. He's so good. Don't piss me off, Art. You know, my favorite line, it's not a rewatchable scene, but it's my favorite line. He comes out, he's got the Jason mask on. He's got the chainsaw. And Rocket goes, where are you going to put a tree that big? He's like, bend over and I'll show you.

How dare you talk to me like that? Wasn't talking to you. Incredible. And then the look that... Because we got to talk about Julia Louis- It's coming. Yeah. And the look, it's just fucking hysterical, man. That's my favorite line of the whole movie. Underrated part of Clark is that like...

Deep down, he's a fucking asshole. As much as he's trying to do the super dad thing, he's a wise ass. He's a fucking dick. What do you have for most of your watchable scene? All of those things, bro. Literally, it's the same fucking list. Except for one. One of my favorite parts of these movies are how horny Clark is. Him and the model at the perfume counter.

is fantastic yeah that's first of all crazy crazy crazy performers by him in that scene he's just continuing to say yeah yeah we're all words it's a little bit nipply outside and russ is like up there's dad he knows his father did clark get me too do you think at some point by his own kids yeah yeah what's aged the best julius lee dreyfus yeah yes like

Right as she's filming Seinfeld Chronicles era, she's so funny and everything. She looks exactly the same now. It's weird. She has not aged a day. She's great.

Do we like Todd and Margo? I think that the making, like, torturing yuppies is a very good late 80s, early 90s. What's age the best? Classic junkies. And it's just like, they're yuppies down to the stereo system, to the jogging, to Todd and Margo. To their, like, no tree. To their minimalist, we're gonna drink wine before we fuck in the middle. Like, the whole nine, they're so yuppie. And they get shit on. The 80s audiences probably love that. Nothing good happens for them. Yeah. Yeah.

Juliette Lewis, basically auditioning for Cape Fear as Audrey, just throwing darts left and right. This...

Griswold daughter character was always like the pissy teenager just having that stage in life and I always thought they nailed it. I think she's the best one. Yeah. Also like when the lights don't turn on and she gives Clark the like it's okay dad it's beautiful even without the lights on I was like that's fucking acting right there. As a father of daughters. I was like one day my daughter will say that to me. I like Diane Leight as Clark's mom I thought she does a good job. The uh

Oh, Juliette Lewis saying, do you sleep with your brother? Do you know how twisted that is? The snoring grandparents are great.

Van, Beverly, D'Angelo, first ballot, white girl hall of famer. First ballot. They threw in a nightgown scene for you in bed. She looks even better. She looks incredible in this. Yeah. I don't feel like they gave her enough to do in this. No, I totally agree. Well, I will say this. They didn't, but she is still the ultimate straight man to what Chevy Chase is doing. But it's a lot more just sparky, sparky, sparky, sparky than like giving her actual stuff. Yeah, I agree. I don't think Ty Lue moved the minutes around well enough for her. Yeah.

Take George and Kawhi out and just let her run the offense for like seven minutes. She should have turned to Jeremiah Chechik and be like, I'm not Bones Highland, man. You need to run some plays for me. There should have been her Christmas shopping on her own and getting hit on by some horny sales clerk. That would actually be really awesome is if they had flipped it and then... And Barb had like...

She had like a guy that she was fantasizing about. That would've been pretty funny. That's what happens in Vegas Vacation with Wayne Newton. Wayne Newton like falls in love with her. That's right. She was really good. I just think that's how they did movies in the 80s where the wife was always like the accessory package for the star. Yeah. Or Ellen, sorry, not Barb. The Christmas tree...

when he does it he puts it in and then the next scene when he's in bed and he rubs her head his hands sticks to it sticks to the lamp the thing's just good stuff in the magazine he's cooking in this like i i had that for what stage the best there's just some good chevy stuff like the buying the presents from the hot sales lady all that stuff uh what's

It's like a top fiver. Shitter's full. Shitter's full. Just, man, I feel like that's on my Twitter timeline once a week. That's what the Chargers owner said to Brandon Staley this morning. Shitter's full. What else do you have, CR? The callbacks to the other movies like The White Loafers and Clark screaming, Russ! When he's right there. Otherwise, you mentioned them. I said, yeah, just torturing the yuppies is really a funny, a funny like thread through the movie. What do you

What do you have, Sean? Anything? Just this becoming, I think, generationally, the Christmas movie. Like, this is the number one. I don't think that they knew that when they were making the third vacation movie and they had to beg John Hughes to come back to write another one. And then Chris Columbus, well, I'm sure we'll talk about that. You never would have guessed that this movie would be

I mean, it's been how many years now? 35 years? 30, almost. And it's aged amazingly. It's like it's on every channel for two months every year. What do you got, Van? For me, it's finding out that your dad is a horny freak.

I remember the moment that it happened for me. Oh, no. You know what I mean? I feel like we've talked about this in a bunch of different... I like that we keep coming back to it. It's true. It continues to age well. Did this come up in, like, Sea of Love? I can't even remember what it's called. We gotta do a basic instinct just to bring Van's dad somehow to... Oh, my God. I just remember it, like, you know, let's put it to you like this. I'll tell the story. I know this is like a family podcast. It's really not. But my dad had gone to college once.

with my seventh grade science teacher. And he sees her and she goes, Terry? And he goes, hey, how you doing?

And I'm like, what the hell is going on? And so then I go get in the truck and they talk and he comes in, he sits down in the truck. He goes, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. And I'm like, what's going on? And he's like, yeah, you know, Miss Williams, man. Tell you what, man, 1975. She was something else, boy. I'm like, what the hell? I'm not going to tell you exactly what he said because, you know. But yeah, so that was the moment I realized, hey, he's...

Fucked other women. He's had sex. He's had a lot of sex before mom. I had for another What's Aged the Best. Are we not going to go around and talk about the women? No. What's Aged the Best. This is like when they just started making sequels. And it's just like, hey, here's some sequels. And here's another one. And they're making Lethal Weapon 2.

Same year as Fletch Lives. Ghostbusters 2. Yeah. Back to the Futures 2. Fletch Lives. Another 48 Hours. Star Trek 5. You go through like the... Karate Kid 3 comes out that year. They're really cashing out on the decade. There's another Nightmare on Elm Street. There's a Halloween movie. You just keep going and going. And there's a Friday the 13th Part 8. Jason Takes Manhattan. It's a good movie. I love it. Police Academy 6. Oh, is that City Under Siege? This is the only sequel that actually like...

really had legs, I feel like. I guess Back to the Future 2, but you know. Back to the Future 2 is phenomenal. But you know what I mean. Like out of like the, we're just trying to grab cash for one more. This one actually was good. I wonder whether you can make the argument that this is the, like the sequel of all of those that you just made. This is the one with the longest, the longest legs. Like this is the one that lasted, that still has the most kind of like a hold on people who watch movies. I had this for my Stephen A. Smith Hottest Take Award.

Is this the best number three movie? Because I feel like we've argued about this before. Lord of the Rings. And Jedi. And we have Lethal Weapon 3. Rocky 3. I might prefer International Mobiary to this. Godfather 3. There's been some good threes. It's in the conversation. This might be the three with the longest legs. I think it's a beloved movie, right? That's the thing. Forget about qualitatively. People just fucking love this movie. Avengers Infinity War.

That's like number 18. Yeah. That's not even, that's not number three. It's a great movie. Avengers is, it's the third Avengers movie. Those are like comic book people. All right. Get out of here. One thing about Back to the Future 2. Not a huge fan of 3. Back to the Future 3. Not a huge fan of it. Is that the Wild West one? Yeah. That sucked. Would you say that Back to the Future 2 is,

I don't think it's held up nearly as well as Christmas Vacation. But it's got the sportsbook stuff. But it's got the sportsbook stuff. It's got the fucking shoes, the hoverboards. I feel like it has a kind of a special place in pop culture. I hope we do that. I like that movie. I like that movie a lot. I do not acknowledge three.

One more what's aged the best is just the electrocuted cat, which they almost cut out and the test audiences loved it and they kept it. It's just the cat going through the forest. That cat has a tough run in this movie. Starts in a box. As you know, I was delighted because I hate cats. We're going to take a break. Shots fired at Mel.

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Some quickies. Kid Cudi pursued happiness, a word for best needle drop. Here comes Santa Claus as the SWAT team shows up is really strong. I love Mala Klikimaka. That's a huge, huge song in my house growing up. That's mine. What do you got for Great Shot Gordo, Chris? I enjoy the network homage when they shoot Brian Doyle Murray down at the other end of the conference room table. He's just like, just leave it there. Yeah. I like the closing credits. It stays on Clark.

and he's staring up and it's like the end and it's like man this is staying a long time it pans back and snots is like one inch away from his crotch it's sneaky you gotta keep watching I bet Gordon Willis loved that shot too Gordon was like that's funny stuff right there

The Madler Rubin Award for Did This Movie Need a Better Sex Scene. Yes. I'm going to say hell yes. Beverly D'Angelo is begging for it in the night going soon. She's like, let's keep this rolling, guys. Let's go rated R right now. What the fuck are we begging for? She's giving us a special.

She had the night out. She was ready to go. Oh my God. She's frisky. She got him in the nap. It would be great if Chevy Chase and Beverly D'Angelo had done the sex scene from Sea of Love. She has him up against the wall mounting him from behind. What are you looking for Sparky? That's the genius of the movie though is that he's constantly being you know drawn in by these supermodel women but his wife is so fucking hot. Yeah.

Butch's girlfriend award weak link of the film. Well, we got to talk about it. Russ's kids went backwards in age. The kids have changed every movie. I think it's like a bit at this point. They're making it. So there's a, I was going to save this for my Stephen A. Smith out of stake, which is really more of a theory than a take. Yeah. But Sean and I love this horror movie called Speak No Evil. Did you ever see that? Yeah.

Is there a chance that the Griswolds are like the Speak No Evil couple who are just replacing their children every four years? Oh my god. And renaming them Audrey. That's dark. That's fucked up. That's dark. That's what the movie says. That'd be an amazing reveal. It's like the new Audrey. Yeah. That's really funny. We found her at Mount Rushmore. And he's like, Audrey, you look different. Yeah.

You look like that girl from Cape Fear. So I'm going to rank the kids. I think we'll all probably have the same rankings, right? I wasn't prepared for this, but go ahead. Yeah. I actually like Juliette Lewis as Audrey the most out of the three Audreys. She's the best Audrey. I agree. And I'd have Dana Barron second, who went on to date Brandon Walsh in 90210. And then the one from Euro, Vacation third. Dana Hall.

Anthony Michael Hall is obviously the best Russ. I would have the Christmas one second. Yeah, Galecki's good. Yeah, Galecki. And then Jason Lively is just last. Just keep adding Rustys. I still have them last. And then Ethan Embry is third, you'd have? Yeah. Who's, I don't remember, what actress plays the daughter in Vegas? I don't remember.

I don't remember either. Yeah. I didn't even feel like looking it up. Fair enough. What's aged the worst other than Randy Quaid in real life? In 2003, NBC aired a spinoff called National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 2, which featured Cousin Eddie's family

On a Christmas vacation in the South Pacific, Randy Quaid, Miriam Flynn, so that's the couple, plus Dana Barron, who's the original Audrey, reprised their roles. The original Audrey? The original Audrey came back. And Ed Astor and Fred Willard were somehow in it. I either saw this and blocked it out of my mind or never knew about it, but this movie exists. Wait, so there's no Clark, though?

There's no Clark. It's a Cousin Eddie movie. But Audrey would be like, I guess I'll go on this South Pacific cruise. Maybe they run into her on the cruise ship. Okay. Just passing along. Any other What's the Age of the Worst fan? I was going to ask the question. I'm fascinated with things that have culturally expired.

It's a Wonderful Life as the defining Christmas movie every single year, has that culturally expired? This is a great question. This is the Private Benjamin question. The answer is yes. When I was a kid, they

They would run it. By the way, when we're talking about Christmas movies, I forgot about A Christmas Story. Yeah. Black Christmas, same director as A Christmas Story. Yeah. But like when I was a kid, there was like a whole block of It's a Wonderful Life over and over and over. And you could not have Christmas without it. It's the grandma movie. I haven't seen it in a long time. It just seems like it kind of fell out of the cultural...

Set it aside as a Christmas movie, it's literally one of the 50 greatest movies ever made. I encourage you to revisit it. It is amazing. It is touching, scary, weird. It is not this hackneyed, cliche, sentimental, gloppy thing. The one second of the movie that we see in Christmas Vacation is what everyone thinks it is.

That's not what it is. And it feels very modern because of the idea of it. But setting all that aside, it was like a major, major, major post-war movie in America. It's 1946, and it's America looking for a more hopeful future.

We're like, we're really far from that now. You know, we're 80 years on from that movie. So it definitely doesn't have, I don't think it sits in the same cultural space that it did when we were kids. I also think it's a consequence of, I have this very distinct memory of whenever I would go home from college or like when I was living in New York. And even back then, it was still kind of like, we only have like 10 channels, 15 channels. And if they're showing It's Wonderful Life, that's just what you were watching. You know, it was, if they're showing Ten Commandments, it's just what's on TV for the next two days.

And now you're like, I'm going to go watch Top Boy. I'm going to go watch Yellowstone in my room. Call me when dinner's ready kind of thing. I think it's like a consequence of like, there's just too much for people to choose from. So they're not like going back to the same movies on the same day together. Did you ever see Jimmy Stewart do the poem about his dog on The Tonight Show? No.

I haven't ascended to you. Okay. It's one of the greatest moments in the history of network television. Do you know what I'm talking about? I don't. I have no idea. So look that up on YouTube. Is Castaway a Christmas movie? I mean, under the fucking diehard definition, I would say it is. He goes away in the holidays. He says, I'll be back. In the spirit of Christmas, sure it is, Bill.

Yeah. We're just never going to agree on this. I feel like Elf has replaced It's a Wonderful Life. Yeah. I feel like Elf is the movie for the current under 40 generation. We were going to do Elf at some point. I didn't want to do two Christmas movies in a row. Elf is great. But Elf, we'll do Elf at some point. Elf's got the Peter Dinklage, Dion Waiters. All time.

Rename the award. Was there a better title for this movie? Oh wait, can I do one more of What's Aged the Worst? Yeah, let's hear it. Clark's credit score.

I feel like every movie he's like really over leveraged. Yeah. And he's just like, yeah, don't worry about it. We got travelers checks. Don't worry about it. Like I'm, I'm way like I, as long as this thing happens, we'll be able to afford this lavish trip that we're on right now. And this one is really funny with the, with the, like you would not put an above ground pool in hoping that you got a bonus. Right. Yeah. Yeah. You know what else? These movies, they are,

they really get into workplace violence a lot. He's doing two different people kidnapped, kidnapping bosses. It's really, it's an eat the rich commentary that's going on in the National Lampoon situation. The Ref, another Christmas movie featuring a kidnapping. Featuring a kidnapping. That movie's bad. Kevin Spacey, where you at? Damn.

Was there a better title for this movie? Would you just go Christmas vacation or do you like having the National Lampoon? I like having the National Lampoon. I also, most people probably just refer to it as Christmas vacation. That's what we do. Best quote. I like when he says, Christmas is about resolving differences and seeing through the problems of petty life. I think that's pretty much true. Clark says that near the beginning. What do you have? Anybody else have a hottest take? I disturbed you with mine. I had my, is this in the running for best number three sequel. Okay.

It's certainly one of the most rewatchable. You have any takes or not? Not really. I don't know if it's a take. I wasn't hinting at it, but I feel like it's the best Chevy chase dramatic performance. Oh, like,

Like, you really believe the crisis of Clark in the movie. Where he's like, because of what Chris was saying, he's like over leveraged on a pool in his house. But he's like, we don't have enough money in the bank to get through this. The movie, at some point, and maybe I've watched, this is the third time I've watched it this Christmas. We watched it twice when I was in Baton Rouge with my mother and my grandmother. At a certain point, it gets weirdly, oddly touching. Like, there's a scene where after he's talking to his niece and

And, you know, they're talking about Santa Claus and he goes, I can't even afford to be an elf. And you're like, fuck, man. Like this guy has hinged this big thing for his family. He's out of these dreams. It's like kind of an American thing. Yeah. It actually kind of gets there as far as that's concerned. The scene when he gets the, he thinks he's getting the bonus check, but he gets a lifetime. That was a little good times. James Evans ish, where he thinks something good is about to happen in the whole family around him. Oh, it's going to happen, dad.

And then he gets kicked in the balls. We don't do Christmas bonuses here at Spotify. Like, is the Christmas bonus in corporate America a thing that people are still like, I don't know what my bonus will be and it will arrive on December 22nd. It's usually set in a contract. Yeah. Well, like, I knew guys that had them, but they were all like these weirdo financial dudes. Yeah, they're all like, I'm going to buy so much cocaine now. You know what I'm saying?

My bonus was an eight ball. Casting what ifs, Chris Columbus was supposed to direct the movie and had a personality clash with Chevy Chase. Yes. You don't say. Not undifficult. And even for as much as we obviously love this movie, it's interesting to read the John Hughes stuff around the time of the film and afterwards where he's like,

yeah this has kind of become just like a chevy chase vehicle thing like it's not it's not like what it was in uh national ampoules vacation where it's like more about the family and stuff like that well it worked out for chris columbus because john hughes is like here's this other script i have and it became home alone one of the most successful movies the last 40 years here's a good one this isn't a casting what if but it's a good casting thing ruby sue

The daughter in this movie who has the scene with him talking about Santa Claus was in one other movie that we've done on the rewatchables that came out two years earlier. Can you guess the movie? 1987. Yes. That's not. No. What? Say it, Sierra. I for sometimes she looks like Newt from Aliens, but I know we have no alien. Was she all dirty in this movie? No. Okay.

She was the little girl on Fatal Attraction. Oh, wow. Who Glenn Close took to the amusement park. And his rabbit got boiled. She boiled a rabbit? So her two big roles were her rabbit got boiled and she got tortured by Glenn Close. And then she's in this movie getting tortured by Cousin Eddie's sewage leak. That's great. I will not be ignored.

Crazy. That's that guy. Brian Doyle Murray is not of that guy. I don't think so. He's excellent in this movie. Nicholas Guest? Doris Roberts isn't of that guy. No. Nah. William Hickey. We did the last time. He's William Hickey. Who's the guy that... Wasn't William Hickey nominated for an Oscar? Yeah. Who's the guy that Clark's... Sam McMurray. Sam McMurray. I have him right now. His buddy. His colleague. His work colleague. He's a huge that guy, right? Sam McMurray. I didn't know his name until I looked it up for this podcast. Is he a voice on The Simpsons?

I don't know. He resembles Princess Skinner. I don't know him from this. There's another movie that I feel like he's more etched into my mind. Is he more of a heel? Like more of a bad guy? Yeah. There's another movie. He's the voice of Duff Beer on The Simpsons. I feel like he plays the police or something like that. And there's another movie that I know him from. It's not this one.

IMDB says we know him from Raising Arizona. That's it. Raising Arizona. That's it. That's the movie. Yeah, that's the movie I know him from. And JLD's husband, whatever. Nicholas Guest. Yeah, he's that guy. What else has he been in? I assume he's related to Christopher Guest. Not sure. I didn't do my Nicholas Guest research for this episode. Dion Waiters and Cousin Eddie. Oh, I have JLD. Over Cousin Eddie? I think Eddie's in too much of it.

And he's fucking Klay Thompson in this movie. I think it's JLD.

That's pretty good. What about Nicolette Scorsese as Mary the sales clerk? So I was trying to do some research around this young lady last night. Not related. Not related to marketing. On your work computer or personal device? Incognito mode? Incognito mode fantasy? No verification on any of those questions. The one image I could find of her not from this movie was a series of paparazzi photos at a movie premiere. Hmm.

And she is on the arm of a young Sean Penn. And it says Sean Penn with date Nicolette Scorsese. Did you watch the Sean Penn on Bernthal's pod video? Of course I did. Oh my God. Incredible stuff. I like, I really like John Randolph in this movie, Chevy's dad. Yeah, he's good. I didn't know anything about him. I'd seen him before. I didn't know if he was that guy or John Waiters or whatever. But he's got a really interesting story. He was a blacklisted actor who,

who had a career in the 50s, and then he and his wife refused to testify during House on American Activities. Didn't work for 15 years. And then in 1966, John Frankenheimer grabs him, and he's like, you know, he was somebody who was trying to resuscitate the careers of people after that. Put him in this movie called Seconds, and then he works as a character actor for like 30 more years. Wow. That's a movie in and of itself. It's a really interesting story.

So J.O. Day, we're going for Cousin Day. That's my vote. All right, DM winners. Recasting couch, 2023 version, who would you have as Clark? This was so hard. When I tell you that I couldn't really picture somebody. Would you do Will Ferrell? Just call it a day? You could, but I kind of think he's too old and he's oddly too goofy. Can I go sideways with a brain breaker? Could Chappelle do it?

I think he might be too old. Well, he's only 50. What is Dave Chappelle's around the same age? Is Clark 50? He's 50. I looked this up. Chevy Chase born 1943. He's about, he's like, he's around 50. That's what I was thinking. I always thought Chappelle was an actor. Yeah, that's like 46. That's,

I just wanted more Chappelle acting. I feel like he could have been in a movie like that. He doesn't do anything. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. Chappelle just smoking a cig, like putting Christmas lights on. I don't know. Will Ferrell's 56 and Chappelle's 50.

So who's an actor who's... I mean, the person who I think is actually trying to have Chevy's career in a weird way is Ryan Reynolds. Ooh. Oh, that works. Oh, yeah. You know, that's the comic tone. He's a touch too good looking. But that works. He doesn't have the everyman quality. He's too jacked. Deadpool is essentially like Fletch with a suit on. Exactly. Jon Hamm, though. He's a little too old, too. Yeah. Ben Affleck?

Too old. I guess he's too old. That's the thing. Who is... Christmas Vacation presented by Mint Mobile. That's the thing. It's like, who's in the age range right now? It's like Ryan Gosling, you know? Well, it's like Chris Evans' age range, right? Yeah. Oh, have you guys seen American Fiction? Yes. Sterling K. Brown. Oh, great call. Like, Sterling... He's too old, too. He's in his 50s. I don't know. I know, but it's the whole black thing. So, like, he could be anywhere from 35... He's 47. Yeah, right. So, Sterling... To me...

Court, I love you. I love Jeffrey. I love Tracy. All my peeps. The single best thing about American fiction to me, he's hysterical in the movie. Sean and I were talking about the other day, like most people would have had him in the lead role and Jeffrey Wright in the other role. Flipped it around? Yeah. Interesting. But the move was to do what Jeffrey did. But Sterling, he's so funny in the movie. There's a cutaway to him on having a phone call with his brother in the movie that is super, super funny when he's in Arizona. Yeah.

Half-assed internet research. The old Dodge pickup that tailgated Clark in the beginning was also used in Overboard and They Live. I love this.

The stories that Dodge Pickup could tell. Wow. Chevy Chase, when he flips out and starts punching the decorations in the front lawn, he actually broke his pinky finger when he punched Santa Claus, which is why he started kicking stuff because he was mad he got hurt. So when you watch that again, he punches Santa Claus, breaks his pinky, and he's like, ah, and just starts kicking stuff. And it might be real and not totally in the script. That's the Jaden McDaniels right there. Yeah. Yeah.

Chris mentioned this. Cousin Eddie's shoes are the same ones that he gave Clark as a gift in the original Vacation. They do a little callback. And then the soundtrack, there's some good stuff with it. Holiday Road, for some reason, is not included. Maybe they didn't want to pay for it. But the opening song has had a whole history in a high school musical. It's just a bunch of the stuff. Made of staples, right? Yeah, and there was...

a bootleg soundtrack that came out that wasn't

official that exists and there's like 10,000 copies of it and people have it. Really? It's a great Ray Charles Christmas song in this movie. And then the score is by Angelo Badalamente, which is the weirdest thing ever because his whole career is basically David Lynch movies. Yeah. You know, he did Twin Peaks, he did Blue Velvet and Christmas Vacation. It's very, very unusual pick for the composer. And then our girl Beverly D'Angelo improvised grabbing Chevy Chase's crotch when the SWAT team held up the house. Um,

Telling you, man, she was upset. Yeah. She got like in shape. She was like, am I going to at least get a shower scene? They're like, no, no, we're going PG this time. Yeah, they changed the whole thing. They didn't come back to it. And then after this, she has maybe like five or six years of being a sexy Hollywood actress. And then it kind of just like dissipates. Well, she jumps right from this movie to a classic that has not been on the rewatchables yet, Pacific Heights. Oh my God. Yeah. Yeah.

The Tenet from Hell. When? I'm putting that on the calendar. I watched Flight again, by the way. Flight's now like... Flight's hanging over... It's circling the runway now? Yeah. Upside down. It's inverted. It's upside down. Apex Mountain. Nobody in the cast.

Being trapped in the attic? Does it ever work better in a movie? Everybody's worst fear, right? Oh, shit. I'm trapped in the attic. That's also when Black Christmas. That's where some of the craziest shit happens is in the attic, yeah. The Jelly of the Month Club? I don't think it's ever been better. Okay. He begs for the Jelly of the Month Club. Christmas lights, I'm going to say yes. Yeah, I have Christmas lights. 35 years of Christmas lights. Can we just... My thinking is taking me here. There's been a lot of accomplishments...

in Chicago. 89-90 Christmas in Chicago. Has it ever been better? Yep. MJ, crushing. Suburban Chicago. How are the Hawks doing? I'm not a big hockey guy. I don't think the Hawks are doing great. What else is going on? Well, Kevin McAllister's stuck at home alone and Clark Griswold's got the fucking lights up. It's the Christmas town. We're on the fumes of the 85 Bears. The last round of Walter Payton. Yeah, we're still talking the refrigerator Perry.

It's pretty good. Obviously, Home Alone is right around the corner. I think for Chicago, you can make a case. I think we litigated this before, that 85, 86 was the peak. Ryan Sandberg. 85 Bears. 85 Bears, they get Jordan, Ferris Bueller. All the Hughes movies are adjacent. It's a good argument. Septic tanks? Septic tanks getting empty in the street? Definitely. That's what I learned about them. They know what it was. When is the top of Christmas movies? For me, it is. But...

Everybody's answer. You know what's crazy? As we've been sitting here naming Christmas movies, now there's...

there's more competition for the top spot than I thought that there was because The Christmas Story is one of my favorite movies of all time. I didn't even think about it. But I still would put this one as my number one. What about Tyler Perry Puts a Star in the Tree? Have you seen that one yet? No, I haven't. Like, here's the thing. And Bill, I want you to be careful because... All right. I'm just making title jokes. All right. Maxine's boy. No. No.

But no, it's my favorite Christmas movie of all time. A good category would be like, how could this be a Tyler Perry movie? Tyler Perry's Christmas bonus. It's a good category because all of his movies...

they almost get there to a point to where you're like, oh shit. And then it's like, it's Tyler Perry. He knows what he's doing. But like basic instinct could be like Tyler Perry's I fucked a serial killer. But here's the thing about the movie though. But here's the thing about the movie though. Here's the thing.

The question is, when you do the Tyler Perry part of a basic— By the way, Tyler Perry, tremendous success. I got to say that. You think he's listening? Okay. He's literally doing the Scrooge McDuck into the gold coins thing right now. He's doing it. I love Tyler. He's just saying, whenever you think about making a movie into a Tyler Perry movie, you have to think about where Madea fits in. So the question is, if you do Tyler Perry's basic instinct,

Where do you put Madea into that movie? She's in the interrogation chair uncrossing her legs. So Madea should be the woman that she's dancing with in the nightclub. She's Roxy? She's Roxy. That's dope. That's dope.

Gabriel, you usually... Medea, let's have a little talk. Man to man. What does he have to say in the bathroom? Medea pulls out the 22. I just watched it. Douglas is naked for 48 seconds for reasons that remain unclear. He's just like, I'm going to walk around with my ass out. Like, that movie to me was...

That was my awakening right there. Basic instinct. Yeah, my mom was talking about it. She went and saw it and she was saying all of this stuff. I was like, that didn't really happen. Medea is Gene Triplehorn? Gene Triplehorn is throwing heat in that fucking movie, guys. The movie's amazing. We did a rewatch of those. Gene Triplehorn is throwing heat. It could be a good live one. Mal kind of closed it down. I can't imagine ever topping what Mal did on that pod. It's kind of like Ryan on the Town. That one's in...

on Mount Rushmore. Yeah, we're never doing the town again. Yeah. I just sent Russillo and Chris, there was a picture of Blake Lively at Taylor Swift's birthday party. And I sent them the picture with the text, I got Sean to babysit. I'm going out for Taylor's birthday. Tyler Taylor gets sick bees tickets. She's got sick cheese tickets. Pickin' nits. Would they really just all go to breakfast without Clark? What happened there? Yeah.

Yeah, that's ridiculous. Clark's not going when they leave him in the attic. Yeah, they leave him in the attic. He's in his pajamas. Everybody else is dressed. Hughes rips himself off like one year later with Home Alone. Like you really leave in the house without your kid. Yeah, maybe that's where I get the idea. There's a full moon from December 18th to December 24th. Just going to point that out. Usually that's not how full moons go. There are also no mountains in Illinois. Great point. Is there anywhere to even go downhill? They go twice to the mountain. They shot in Colorado. So, yeah.

Any of the pick and hits? Oh, the, obviously the tree, the tree, the tree, you're going to uproot a goddamn tree out of the frozen ground. I got another one too. The related to trees, the second tree, you know, the squirrel,

squirrels not jumping out when you're bringing the tree in the house. Squirrels are the jumpiest creatures of all time. True. Was that squirrel sleeping in there? Getting away. That's not happening. I mean, we could pick, it's a comedy, but you could pick, it's like, you couldn't slide down that fast and go that far and end up at a Walmart. That's hysterical. I'm not going to do that. Yeah. Sequel, prequel, prestige TV, all black cast are untouchable. I think we've broken that down like every way you could. Yeah, Madea's Christmas bonus. Yeah. Love it. Blair Underwood as Clark.

Is this movie better with Wayne Jenkins, Danny Trejo, Catherine Hahn, Steve Buscemi, Sam Jackson, JT Walsh, Byron Mayo, or Philip Baker Hall? I was looking for some place to put Byron here, but the SWAT team busting in at the end is just pure Wayne Jenkins. Goddamn, Clark! I didn't know I was with Super Kidnapper! You're like Paul Dano in the yet-to-be-released-in-Eville-a-new-movie podcast!

Listeners, and what's with all these senior citizens hanging out in your living room? You got the fucking cast of Cocoon in here. And motherfucking Diane Latch. You better let your boss go. You're long a fucking time, big boy.

It's not just about the volume. The intensity. It's like the heat wave. Wait till Wayne Jenkins checks in on Ted Leonis moving the Wizards to fucking Virginia. How says that's not happening? Okay. Yeah. I mean, I know he'd be more concerned with the Ravens, but... Just what Oscar who gets it? Chavs. Who? Chavvy.

You want to go Randy Quaid supporting? Who won supporting actor this year? In Oscars. 1989? Where do you have to beat? Isn't that Driving Miss Daisy here? Whatever could beat that. Please let it win. Okay. They always do this. When you look up the 1989 Oscars and then it shows them wrong. Because it's like 1990. At some point in my life, I'm going to figure that out. This is going to be sick. Yeah, it's Denzel and Glory. Oh, man.

Can you imagine if fucking Randy Quaid from Christmas Vacation beat Dead, Cell, and Glory and then Bill was the only guy who was like, yeah! There he goes!

Love that guy. He could have gotten a nomination. This is a good Oscar. Driving Miss Daisy is awful, but it's born on the 4th of July. Dead Poets Society, Field of Dreams, My Left Foot for Best Picture. And then you've also got Crimes and Misdemeanors that year. Do the Right Thing, obviously. Danny and LA. Randy Quaid in Vacation is just as good as Dan Aykroyd in Driving Miss Daisy.

I was going to say Marlon Brando in a dry weight season. When was the last conversation about that movie? I have never seen that movie. Tyler Perry's a dry weight season. A dry weight season is good. I've never seen it. Yeah. This is the first I've ever actually heard of it. I've never seen it before. Criterion Collection, check it out. This was the year that Michelle Pfeiffer did not win for The Fabulous Baker Boys, which is a top 10 Oscar crime. Can I be honest with you? Terrible. Michelle Pfeiffer, maybe not, but that portrayal,

All time minted Hall of Fame white girl. Love it. On top of the piano. She should run the Oscar. Probably unanswerable questions. Why didn't we have more Griswold movies? Especially as Chevy's career started to drop in the 90s. I feel like they could have

pumped on out like every three years we could add an easter movie we could have done thanksgiving yeah yeah it feels like they just could have kept this going i mean people don't like working with him he's not a nice guy he's really not a nice sorry chevy he's a comic genius he was you know and you know what it's interesting with his career because as long as he was it's like anything else they put up with the asshole

And sorry to say it like that, but that's the word. They put up with the asshole for as long as the asshole is hot. And then the first opportunity they get to not do it anymore, they bail. That's what happened to him. He would keep getting like, oh. You signaling Chris right now? I'm not part of Van's coup. Did Todd and Margo stay married after this holiday week?

Divorce. They don't have kids. They don't have pets. She seems really fed up with him by the end of this. I think it's over. And I'll be honest with you. Todd didn't really do nothing. Nah. Todd sucked. Go over to the house and yell at him. But, I mean, for what?

He's got to stand up for his house. I know. I think that it's underrated how fucked up it is when Chevy's like, bend over and I'll show you. Talking to your wife and I'm wearing a ski mask or a hockey mask and waving a chainsaw. The guy's got a chainsaw on his fucking head. The fucking cops are getting called. Yeah. Any other unanswerables? We did everything, right? Yeah. All right.

Best double feature choice has got to be The First Vacation. I would pair these together and that's a fun three hours and 40 minutes. Or Home Alone. Or Home Alone. I like Four Christmases just because totally it's pretty similar to this or it's in the same ballpark. The Indian Reds won an award for What Happened the Next Day. Did Clark ever get the pool?

They go under construction? Probably happens, right? 20% on top of that bonus. He's got enough money. The better question is when Brian Doyle Murray gets back and talks to his CFO about bringing the bonuses back, and he's just like, can't do that. And he's like, all right. He's like, here's what happened. They kidnapped me, but I realized I was wrong. I mean, that little decision is going to cost him a couple million dollars. A lot of people are working for him. What piece of memorabilia would you want from this movie, Vin? I want the fucked up slit.

Oh, the silicone sleds. Yeah, I want the silicone sled with that iconic for me. I was thinking Bear's hat. Bear's hat's great. Just because he wears it for the first half of the movie. But the sled's a good one. What do you got? I like Clark's Tasmanian Devil coffee mug in the office. And then he's got the Wally World mug that he has around the house. Also, Blackhawk's jersey is pretty good. The old school Blackhawk's jersey he's wearing. Coach Finstock Award for Best Life Lesson.

Nobody has an easy holiday season? I'm about to have a three-person Christmas this year. Me, my wife, and my daughter. Those are the best. And I think the lesson of this is don't invite people over for Christmas. Why do you think I live in LA? Make them travel. Got away from all my family. They have to come see me. You want to be a part of this? You're like, come on, Michael Corleone in Tahoe. I'm here, yeah.

It's a large body of water. You gotta... Mine is, if a dog starts humping your leg, let him be. Let him fish. That's fair. Who won the movie? Chevy. Agreed. Chevy. Chevy across the board. Yeah. We don't have Craig today because he's not here, so we can't get his take. I'm sure he enjoyed it. But we are...

Yeah, I wonder if we could just have Craig dub himself in at the end. He didn't die. Well, I was excited for his take because he didn't really like the first vacation. Tyler Perry's Greg Kohlbeck's funeral? Yeah. Madea's little eulogy. Good to see you guys. Happy holidays. Happy holidays.