A 2025 Rewatchables Mailbag
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All right, I'm not sure if this is the first Rewatchables mailbag. Have we ever done this before? We did a categories mailbag. Oh, that's right. We did. But we refreshed them. We came up with, our listeners sent in Cruise vs. Hanks. That's where we got that. Was that before or after I got the vaccine?

Because I don't remember anything after the vaccine. Is this fire bill? It's no longer pulled back. Yeah, fuck it. We have no idea how long this is going to be. It could be one part. It could be two parts. That's producer Craig right there. Craig Horlbeck. CR. Chris Ryan. We've been doing the rewatchables. We had like, was the eight, nine, nine year anniversary. Is that right? Of when we did the heat.

20 years of heat, which by the way, in 2025, 30 years of heat. I was at the Lakers Spurs the other night and a guy shouted out from the crowd, four heat! And that was it. That's all he brought to the table? And that was Victor Wembyn-Yama. Wemby loves it. Four heat, and he's like, no! I sent you that thing where the backup keeper for Liverpool is a big Rewatchables fan.

Really? Yeah. How do we get him the starting job? We have to... Well, I don't want him to get the starting job yet. We have a best friend in the world. He's really good, but Allison is the best. Well, Craig's been our producer since... For how many years? Since 2018? Yeah, 2018. We had Zach Mack initially, then Craig moved in, and we've woven him into the podcast. He's hosted a couple. We decided he had to be involved in the mailbag. I have a lot of mailbag questions. Thanks to everybody who mailed them into the Rewatchables33 at gmail.com.

I'm going to go through these. Is it mostly new category suggestions or just broad questions? What is it? It's all kinds of things. Some constructive feedback. So I think I organized this correctly. We're going to go through them. I'll try to stop after each question. First one, a new category idea from Matthew B. The Chris Ryan Award. Would this movie be better if a main character smoked? Yeah.

It's a good idea. So I've been thinking a lot, big picture about the categories because we had, we had a bunch from the last thing too. And maybe the move is, um, going forward where it's like, let's say you and I are hosting. Yeah. I have a spot. Maybe we get rid of like big kahuna burger or something like that. And I have a spot where it's like, you can take any of the extra categories you want.

Right? Yeah. So if it's like flex position. Yeah. It's a flex. It's a flex spot. Maybe there's two flex spots in the pod. And then we have like 20 possibles. And obviously what it, what's aged the best down waiters, all those stay in, but then,

When we talk about like great shot Gorda. How many of these categories are related to smoking of the flex? Well, that's tough because the answer is always yes. Matthew B had it. Dan White suggested the Sean Penn. I brought my own pack award for excellence in onscreen smoking, which I like. Is Sean Penn the right person for that? Or would you go Jimmy Conway? I think I would bring Sean Penn because Sean Penn also insists on smoking in every onscreen interview he does where he's like, I think that's part of the...

The barrier to entry is like you got to let Penn smoke American spirits on camera. Well, I remember when he came to our old studio to do the BS pod with me.

And it was like a Sunday one o'clock and he stunk a cigarette stand. And I was like, I really admire this guy. This guy is on brand at all times. So you would, you're okay with the Sean? I'm okay with it. I brought my own pack. I like in general, just like knowing what actors did for real in the movie. I think that's a fun. I got it. As you know, this is an obsession of ours and especially mine. I always, I always look for it. And when I watch the guy, the, usually it's actors smoking. Yeah.

I always wonder like are they smoking fake ones I was wondering if Billy Bob's smoking real cigarettes in Landman I was thinking about that in the season finale yeah cause I I want I feel like he's just like you guys need another shot you guys need another angle cause I'll spark up again cause they had do you watch Landman no they had a gasoline scene in the season finale I won't spoil it but he's covered in gasoline

And then somebody offers him a cigarette. He's covered in gasoline. Yeah, he's still covered in gasoline. Be really careful where you ash. Be careful. He's like, I'm already whatever. And he just starts smoking. So then Dan White also suggests, conversely, you have the Sean Penn I Brought My Own Pack Award, the Tom Cruise Which End Do I Light Award for terrible on-screen smoking. I like both of those. So I think maybe we just keep it in mind. That's what I really want to do with the pod going forward. It's like conditional categories depending on...

Where we are. Because a lot of times we just put that on what's aged the best, what's aged the worst. But maybe smoking needs a bigger platform. Yeah, let's put more attention on smoking. Let's promote it. Especially right now. Who is our Mount Rushmore for cigarette smokers? For just actually good ones or the Tom Cruise one? To me, Jimmy Conway is Jordan. Sean Penn, Jimmy Conway. I think... So this is most believable smokers. Gabriel Byrne? Because De Niro did this thing. He'd flip it.

just it was these two fingers but the way he did it do you respect it less if they were real smokers in real life is it cool I think you know or if you were able to act that well but I feel like the assumption is is that all actors are either recently quit still secretly or smokers I think when you act you're just in a trailer and somebody's like you want to have a segway yeah I would love to have it yeah I'd love to have a trailer

They all stink of cigarettes. Edie Falco and Copland, which I was thinking that maybe is an award to the Edie Falco and Copland award for this character somehow became three times hotter because she smoked Blake Lively in the town. We need to start adding visuals to these categories too on YouTube. Like whenever time we introduced that category, we got to show Edie. Right. Yeah. Well,

Sean sent us, what was that Twitter account? The smoking account. It was, uh, it was this, this Twitter account where they measure how many cigarettes were smoked during the movie. And that's the entire Twitter account. That's fun. It's like how many F words, but how many cigarettes? Yeah. That's good. So this guy went through and this was just his thing. I think cigarette smoking in movies. How many cigarettes? It's at cigarette movies on X. Yeah. There you go. That's you. That's actually my website. All right. So we're going to step up the smoking stuff. Yeah. Good start. Yeah.

This is from Cindy Hollenbeck. Bill, you are my spirit animal, which my kids say is no longer politically correct. Ha ha ha. I love the bad news bears, slap shot animal house. Cindy Hollenbeck is my mother, by the way. This is great. She loves bad news bears, slap shot animal house, catty shack, fast times. Find myself nodding along your perspectives. I enjoy everyone's knowledge, senses of humor, dirty jokes and analysis. Okay. Category recommendation in line with Cruz versus Hanks.

Can you find two female actresses? Or she said two female actors, which I probably should have said. That's why you're not the spirit animal. Can you find two female actors as well? I'm thinking of Sandra Bullock versus Nicole Kidman or Michelle Pfeiffer versus Ellen Barkin. Meg Ryan versus Goldie Hawn. You see where I'm going. All right. So I put real thought on this. I like this idea. Okay. I like this Fallen Cruz-Hanks. But I also think Cruz and Hanks are one-on-one as a combo. We don't have the actress version of that. Yeah.

But what I do think we have, I think you could do Julia Roberts, Sandra Bullock, Michelle Pfeiffer, Nicole Kidman and make it a foursome. And we could keep track of that as well. Because I think those are like Julia Roberts versus Bullock is fun. Pfeiffer, we always talk about anyway. Kidman's got a little more drama. Pfeiffer's appeared in a lot of casting what ifs. Yeah. So I think if those were the fours, are there anybody else you would put in there? Julia, Sandra Bullock, Pfeiffer, Kidman.

Because Demi Moore, probably a little too limited. There's got to be somebody more recent, right? Well, I was thinking, so somebody like under 40? Like Emma Stone? Emma Stone or Jennifer Lawrence or something? Yeah. Oh, Jennifer Lawrence. So maybe Jennifer Lawrence replaces Julia. Julia's fine. They almost have to be the same age, though. It's going to be hard to do. Because you're basically looking at these movies and you're like, Billy Crystal's girlfriend in Running Scared. Would that have been better if it was Goldie Hawn? Yes.

Yeah, so... I almost think we just need... It needs to be two people. Cruise vs. Hanks is iconic because it's two. It's got to be... So is it modern people or old people? It's whoever makes the most sense. Cruise and Hanks are perfect equals and they're opposites in a great way. It's really hard because Cruise and Hanks works for super bad and it works for like... Yeah. It works for like Howard Zinn. I can't figure out who it is then because you could go more modern. You could go J-Law vs. Emma Stone. Yeah. Yeah.

But I don't know if that's Cruz or Hanks worthy. I mean, Cruz has been in 15 rewatchables already. There's a... Julia Roberts versus Sandra Bullock? There's also a humor to Cruz versus Hanks that I just don't know if it's there for Julia Roberts versus Sandra Bullock. It wouldn't be funny to be, would you rather have Sandra Bullock or Julia Roberts in Den of Thieves? Yeah, it's like, you know. All right. We'll keep workshopping that one. There's no right answer yet. There's something there. I like the idea of Michelle Pfeiffer just being involved because, as you know, I love her. All right. New category idea from Will Hanselman.

As a long-suffering Lions fan, Dan Campbell is my hero and number one anxiety inducer. I suggest a category called the Dan Campbell scale, given to a character or scene that makes you think, holy shit, are they really going for this as it's actually happening? For instance, the Illuminati orgy in Eyes Wide Shut is a 100% Dan Campbell, Gerard Butler's big neck eating the donut off the ground, 75% Dan Campbell, etc.,

And then he says, best wishes. Thanks for all your awesome work. That's how I felt when they started singing in Amelia Perez. I was like, wow, fourth and 18. We're going for it. Wow, they pulled golf and they're going wildcat. Fourth and 18. What is the all-time holy shit they're really going for this? I really like the idea of eating the donut off the ground. It's a perfect Dan Campbell. Maybe there should be a fourth and a certain amount of yardage scale for the game.

For the Dan Campbell scale. Yes. It's like, was this a fourth and two or was it a fourth and 12? Yeah, so when Neil goes back for Edie, or no, goes back for Wayne Groh, even though he's clear and away free. Oh, that's Dan Campbell. That's fourth and nine. Yeah, that's like I'm faking a punt up nine. It's fourth and nine from the 10. Yeah. But then there's some that it's like it's a tush push. It's a lock. It's a guarantee. All right, that's good. I think we worked that one in somehow. Good one. Congrats to Will Hanselman. Here's a question from Kevin O'Connell.

I think no relation. Why the hell haven't you done a rollerball episode? I was sure you'd do it during 70s sports movie month. The mustaches, the lapels, the bonkers sport, the more bonkers plot, Jimmy fucking Khan. I know you're all riding the high of finally doing Pulp Fiction after teasing it for so long, but to quote the wolves, quote the wolf, let's not start sucking each other's dicks yet.

I feel like every fifth episode, Bill is itching to let the rollerball discussion loose. Is he the only one who wants it? I would love to get into which current athletes would succeed at rollerball, how a rollerball fantasy would work.

What the hell is the point of that scene of those rich people blowing up trees? These are all great comments. When we finish this pod, Craig and I are going to do sort of a footnote pod about which emails we think you secretly sent. No, I did not. Bill is so handsome. When will you let him do rollerball? You are my sun spirit animal. I think...

I think faking mailbag answers and questions is one of the worst things you can do as a host. I would never do it. Now, what's funny is Kevin O'Connell wrote like four or five different rollerball emails over the, he really wants it. Okay. Um, I've never seen that movie. I have no relationship to it. I think it should have gone in probably 70 sports, but I'm sure we'll find a spot for it.

It might be the 50th anniversary. I think I had it on my schedule. What about Jimmy Conn July? Jimmy July? Well, unfortunately, we've done most of his movies. That's the problem. Well, look, can we find three other Jimmys to put in July? Sure. Jimmy Stewart. Jim Carrey. Yeah. Which current athletes would succeed at playing rollerball? Josh Allen. So rollerball, they're skating around a rink.

It's like a fake extreme sport, right? It's like football crossed with the roller derby and it's just incredibly violent. Okay. So Josh Allen would be kind of amazing at it. He would be my pick anyway. Craig's got to see that one. Cooper Djean.

new category idea from John Hageman here it is was there a porn parody of this movie he just wants to know yeah could be a quiz style format that would generate some surprising results I'm pretty sure the answer is yes for the Blair Witch Project I immediately thought about how bad this would be for Google and viruses yeah I'll have to buy a second computer

I did find a Reddit thread of like 150 porn parody titles that actually happened. Was that on the Bill Simmons Reddit? It was not. It was on some movies Reddit. There are definitely porn parodies for most popular movies. Do they still do those? I don't know. I went through and found some that have actually been done of movies we did on the rewatchables, including...

Shaving Ryan's privates. Right. Titty slickers. I don't remember that one. Forest hump. Yeah. The sperminator. Come and comer. Oh, yeah. No, that existed. What about boob? Die hard on. Yeah. Good. When Harry fucked Sally. Good. Legs wide shut. Goodwill humping. My best friend's wedding with two Ts. And then glad he ate her.

We should make you guys come up with the porn title for every movie. There's something there. I do think it is going to be when we're doing one now, doing one going forward, I will check to see if there was a porn parody. So like for Manchester by the Sea, what would be the porn parody? They probably didn't do that one. Do they still make porn parodies? Man in the CC? Now it's just like, now they just do scenes. Do they even make movies anymore? That's why I was asking Craig. He's younger, you know? Craig's like, no comment. I don't know.

Category idea from Jordan Grimmer. Best worst five word summary of the movie. Similar to Bill's movie trailer elevator pitch idea. Panelists offer their best or worst five word summary of the movie or their impression of the movie. Example, heat. An LA bank heist unravels or a guy reads book about metals.

So I guess before we get into the categories, we would all have to do a five-word summary of the movie. Yeah. I'm not against this. Or if I haven't seen the movie, you guys text me your five-word summaries before I watch it. Yeah, we're explaining to Craig what the movie is in five words. Godfather, Italian-American family goes through decades. No, that's six words. Yeah. I don't know. I like the game of it. We may try it for a couple of six words. Italian-American family eats dinner. Yeah. Yeah.

A big picture question from Captain Jack. What movie... I'm glad Captain Jack's doing well, by the way. What movie have you always wanted to do, but you were scared nobody would listen? Also, what movie have you always wanted... Also, what movie have you always wanted to do and are scared nobody would listen, but you're doing it anyway? Hmm.

Um, Sierra, you want to go? I mean, Cruising was the movie that I think we had teased for a really long time that we were like, would 17 people listen to this? We'll never actually do it. And then I feel like Culture met us kind of where we were. And now- And Cruising had like a little bit of a revival. Blu-ray 4K. Yeah. Cruising coming out in March. Seriously. The 4K. The 4K. The real Recruiting. The 4K. Yeah. Are we doing the Recruiting when that comes out? What about you?

All right. So the movie I've always wanted to do, but I was scared nobody would listen is Eddie and the cruisers, which we've talked about forever, which is also hard because Eddie and the cruisers is not on streaming. Correct. Not on streaming. You and I, you told me it was on TMC. I have it on cable. It's saved on my thing. Craig's never seen it.

It really hurts my feelings that it's not available. I don't, everything's available. How is it not on TV? We've broken through that barrier before. We got Pump Up the Volume back on stream. The only one that was tough, I actually got a text from a friend of a friend who is a diehard Rewatchables fan and they watch every movie that we cover and she was asking how she could find The Vanishing.

It's gone? You can't find it. The American Vanishing is gone? The American Vanishing is impossible to find. You can't stream it anywhere. Craig. Jeff. Drink the coffee. Eddie and the Cruisers needs to come back. Tubi.

You greedy motherfuckers. You're making so much money right now. Don't think we haven't noticed. Rewatchable's movies are on your carousel. We were watching football the other day, and it was just like Tubi this and Tubi that. I was like, oh, look who's come out and decided to play with the big boys. Oh, you think you're better than us, Tubi. Just put Eddie and the Cruisers on there, or else we're declaring war. So wait, yours was Cruising?

That was the one that I was like, this will be our last pot if we actually go for it. But what's your one you want to do now, but you're scared nobody will listen? I mean, you've certainly sent me a couple. Why can't you just know on top of your head? Pre-vaccine, you would have been able to come up with it. So this is just niche movie that you love, but nobody else cares about. Or you think it's too controversial? It would probably be...

I honestly can't. The cruising would just like be like, if you can do cruising, if you can do proof of life, if you can do pump up the volume, pump up the volumes not available to be seen. Yeah. Then what can't you do? True. Yeah. So like Carlito's way is too big. It's huge. I mean, I'm dying to do that. So what movie have you always wanted to do and are scared nobody would listen, but you might do it anyway?

I want to do Jim Cotta at some point. What's that? It might be a me and Kyle Branter. Jim Cotta? Yeah. I'm not even going to tell you what it's about. Give me the five word summary. So it's after the 84 Olympics. It's Kurt Thomas, this gymnast that won a gold medal

They kind of make it it's an action movie he gets he goes to some country and he's got to rescue somebody But during the movie the action scenes there's somehow gymnastics in them So there's like a pommel horse where he fights a guy, but he swings in the pommel horse I can't even describe how awful this movie is and I was thinking Jim Kada might be mine. All right next one This one's for you see arts from Bobby Sleeth to ease. I

I listened to the There Will Be Blood episode and laughed my fucking ass off when CR did the Jackson mainline from Star Is Born in Daniel Plainview's voice. I'd forgotten I did that. I'd like to have another look at your face, please. Turn around. I'd like to look at your face. I'd like to get another look at you. Therefore, I'd like to nominate Daniel Plainview as consideration for Would This Movie Be Better With category.

And suggest that Wayne Jenkins send some of the other candidates away for a very long time. Yeah. Well, so I love adding Daniel Plainview to that. That's a great idea. Do you feel like there should be a promotion and relegation system? Ooh. We've already got rid of a couple of people. Yeah. But we also, we got rid of one and added, but there needs to be like five or seven. Yeah.

Do you feel like you have some plain view in you in 2025? Sure, yeah. All right, so we'll add him. Yeah. What else are you working on at home? There's another one coming up that's even better than this. Jerry Jones? Yeah. Would this movie have been improved with an eight-minute Jerry Jones monologue? That's a good idea. I'm going to throw that in. A sequel question. Like would Black Panther be improved if Jerry Jones was just like, here's how I bought a cowboy. Just sit in front of a cue card for three minutes. Yeah.

When that happened, at what point during the scene did you realize it was fucking awesome? It took about 40 seconds for me and then I was like, wow. When he got a little misty. Yeah, I was like, wow. Am I on drugs or is this really good? I also think that when they cut away to Billy Bob and Ham and the various reaction shots, they seemed legit impressed. Yeah. I did. I asked Ham and Ham said there was some editing. Oh, yeah. I think Ham felt upstaged.

Calling out Jerry. He was like, settle down. Well, they're like Don Draper. Why don't you lie there with some tubes up your nose while the Cowboys owner does a 10 minute scene? Does Don Draper come back? No. Okay. A sequel question from Steven McDonald. With Den of Thieves 2 out now and Heat 2 being worked on, have you asked Affleck what the town 2 would look like? The answer is yes. I bring it up probably every time I've ever talked to him. He suggests... Does Affleck suggest? No, this is the emailer. Would Shine...

who has strong gem traits, be all grown up running a crew and tracking down Dougie, who may or may not be Shine's pop? That's a possibility. Would they be in conflict or would Doug come out of retirement to mentor her both? Or is there a whole new storyline with Shine and Krista out of the picture? My feeling is... So Doug ends up in... In Florida, right? Florida Keys. Yeah. Right? He's checked out. He's got money. I think Shine is grown up and...

is involved in Charlestown again and somehow somebody's in danger. How old is Shine in the movie? Shine's a little kid. She's like 20 now. Okay. Shine would be 20 and maybe her and her boyfriend now are running Charlestown and somehow Doug, somebody in Doug's life is in danger. Okay. Right? Yeah. And he has to go back and save. So you wanted to go back to Boston. You don't want Miami the town.

Well, that could be the other way it goes is shine and her, her boyfriend. Who's basically like Gary Oldman and true romance. Yeah. Wash up in Florida. Like we got to get our bench on, in the Florida key. And then it becomes this Florida keys crossing the town. Yeah. They could go down and get some mojitos, a little running scared. Right. Yeah. Here's the thing. I think the town has to happen. I think there has to be a heist. And I think it has to be in Boston. Is there another iconic Boston landmark that could be robbed? Yeah.

Beyond Fenway Park? Yeah. Yeah, the Boston Garden's gone. Not like Fenway. No, I don't think so. Maybe they could rob Harvard. Oh, yeah. It's like Good Will Hunting crossed with these fucking spoiled brats, rich kids going to have it.

Get that money back. Rob Harvard. What are you going to rob? I don't know. Important documents. I don't know. So you would set it in Massachusetts or the Keys? Florida. I think people try to redo this. Like when they do sequels, I think they try to just run back the hits instead of like expanding it out. And I think it would be really cool if it like Shine shows up in Florida and is like, I need a million bucks by next week or these guys in Boston are going to kill me because my boyfriend's gotten us in trouble.

Shine shows up. And Doug is like, I'll do one last job for you. Shine shows up. It seems good initially. How'd you find me? We have a how'd you find me scene. Then we have, I'm just drifting around, blah, blah, blah. Do you bring Blake Lively back? Oh, yes. We absolutely bring Blake Lively back. Is she allowed to work still? Sure. Okay. Yeah, she's back.

Think? Yeah. Right? We just won't cast Baldoni in it. He's out. Baldoni is the bad guy. This is it. This is how we heal the loss. We bring all the five families together. Baldoni is the drug lord in Florida Keys. I will say, I think the Florida Keys is one of the great underrated...

movie TV locations. I'm always in. There could be a Florida movie month probably, right? Oh, yeah. What was the movie, what was the TV show we liked on Netflix? Bloodline? Bloodsport? Bloodline. That was set in the Keys. I watched that with Kyle Chandler. Kyle Chandler, yeah. Jesus. Where'd this come from?

I don't know. That's a running bet. You just did like the other day you did like here are the last 25 years of NBA history. You're like, oh, I can't remember if Baldoni is in this. Bloodline had the guy Mendelsohn who ended up in in Ozark. Uh-huh.

It had our guy Kyle Chandler. Ben Mendelsohn's not in Ozark. Wasn't he in Ozark? He was season three? Oh, maybe he wasn't. No. I'll get on it. Who was Laura Linney's brother in Ozark? That was Ben Mendelsohn. Tom Pelfrey. Oh, yeah, you're right. I'm mixing up my character actors I love. I like the keys. New category from Jordan G.

How about a best call out or what I like to call the Lieutenant Weinberg award for a character unnecessarily calling someone out. What did Colonel Jessup have against Lieutenant Weinberg? Well, it was Vail Dana. Yeah. For example, in old school, when Will Ferrell goes streaking, he says, come on, Snoopaloop. Or in super bad, when Jonah Hill calls out Dave Franco and Jim Sacher for pissing himself as a kid. Who says no to this category? You? You, editorial director Ryan? Yeah.

I'm not against it. We can throw it into the possibles. Yeah. I'm going to keep an eye out for it. I don't know how many movies have this. I think that happens a lot in spy thrillers. You'll all of a sudden get the Ed Norton, Chris Cooper...

uh character to like start screaming at people who are like god damn it i need a secure line and you're just like whoa this guy was just getting coffee a second ago so maybe it's like the lieutenant weinberg drive-by shooting award for oh i like that yeah unexpected like drive-by shooting of somebody else in the movie yeah all right i don't mind that one this is this is a good one we're not gonna be able to give it out that often it's a new category from jake oakman some interesting names

The Jules Winfield That Guy Graduation Award. When a that guy gal so owns the world that they go from becoming that guy to an actual name. Like,

Like it was this role, this movie that elevated them? Yes. So like I think Giamatti in Sideways is a really good one from this, right? Great one. So he says, this is named after the greatest that guy graduation in history when Sam Jackson played Jules and went from that guy from Goodfellas or Jurassic Park to Samuel motherfucking L motherfucking Jackson. Other examples he had, Bradley Cooper in The Hangover, Glenn Powell in Top Gun Maverick. Mm-hmm.

This is a great category and it can be within the Joey Pants award. Yeah. Is there a graduation day in this film? So I thought the Boogie Nights had two. Wahlberg? Cheadle? No, it had John C. Reilly and Philip Seymour Hoffman. Oh. I think before and after, I didn't, I knew John C. Reilly, but I didn't. And then after that, I was like, John C. Reilly, I love that guy. Yeah. So, but Sam is the best one. So I'm going to keep an eye on this one too. I like the graduation concept. Uh,

Just a fact from Todd A. in Dublin, Ohio. Love the rewatchables. Big fan of All Things The Ringer. I can't believe you guys can spend so much time on the woman rounders and not cover the fact that Gretchen Moll's real-life husband, Todd Williams, used to be married to Fonky Jansen. The guy pulled off the real-life reverse Mike McD. Didn't know that. Didn't come up with the half-assed research. How is it that we've done rounders twice? We've done rounders twice. And that never came up.

This is really good. New category from Rob Shire. The Steven Seagal hard to kill award for did the sex scene in the movie need a better intimacy coordinator? Yeah. I was thinking about this. Roadhouse would have this maybe basic instinct. Sure. Yeah.

I just like having a Steven Seagal category. Remember when you didn't know who he was and then we brought him into your life? Yeah. And it was one of the best things we ever did. Now I watch Under Siege weekly. Yeah. Yeah. Steven Seagal heard about no intimacy coordinator in Enora and he was like, I respect it. We didn't have one on Hard to Kill either. Good move. Way to go, Sean Baker. Category idea from Mark in Ottawa. This didn't quite get there, but I wanted to hit it.

For movies that have a huge twist, rate any movie's crazy unexpected twist. And then he said, I actually thought of this when listening to the Sixth Sense podcast, which is clearly a 10 out of 10 for a twist. Psycho's 10 out of 10. Darth Vader being Luke's dad. The Matrix, 9 out of 10. Humans are just batteries. Fight Club, 8 out of 10.

You could also have fun when the intended surprise twist is blatantly obvious. Oregon still being alive in the two towers was a one out of ten. I don't know what that means. Aragorn. Aragorn? Yeah. Lord of the Rings. So that was a one out of ten twist? I guess so, yeah. There's not a lot of twists in Lord of the Rings. So next time we do a movie with a twist, I think maybe we bring in the scale. But then... Is Twin Towers coming in 2025? It's not. Okay. Okay.

But then, this is the end of the email. I've also got a related entertaining story about another plot twist movie, Star Trek, The Wrath of Khan. My Trekkie buddies and I went opening night. The 7 p.m. show sold out, so we just waited in line for the 9.30. When the 7 p.m. show lets out, one of the guys yells out, Spock dies at the end.

parentheses personally I'd rate this an 8 out of 10 some large guy who's in line next to us for the 930 steps out of line punches the guy out and then calmly walks back into our line moral of the story don't mess with the Trekkies

That would have been an amazing thing to see in person. I have a similar story to this, which was like spring 96, like whenever Menace to Society came out. Yeah. I had already seen it in theaters and was going back for the second time with a bunch of friends, but like was a kid and couldn't control myself. So I was like, no, there's just a fucking amazing shot when they go through there. And then this guy's like bang and bang. And this dude just turns around. He goes, excuse me. I haven't seen the movie yet.

I just like melted. You're like, I'm never talking to him again. I had a college professor. I took a film class and he was talking about movie spoilers and how if you haven't seen these certain movies, there's a certain amount of time where if you haven't seen it, he didn't care. He asked the class, it was a big class, two, 300 people. He said, raise your hand if you haven't seen The Sixth Sense. I hadn't yet. And maybe 18, 20, 25 people raised their hand out of 300. And then he goes, Bruce Willis is a ghost. And I was just like...

Are you fucking kidding me? And then he was like, has anyone here seen Fight Club? And I hadn't yet. And I got up and I left. Did you really? Did you go back to the class or did you drop it right there? No, I just left for the rest. Why did he do that? That's so weird. That guy sucked. I forget his name, but look at me now. I told this story in the Usual Suspects pod. I told the story when Jacko made me mad and I ruined Usual Suspects for him. That was the proudest I've ever been.

He was being a dick. I was like, Kevin Spacey. There's nothing worse. He's like, no! Why? There's nothing worse than spoiling a movie for somebody. Category suggestion from George in the UK. The Forrest Gump Premature Ejaculation Award.

What do you think this is? A movie ended too quickly? Yeah. The movie finishes sooner than you'd expected. I was wondering what the reverse of this would be. Like, what is the, they went on for another 20 or 30 minutes longer than I thought? Yeah, it's just like the one more pump. Like, what is the reverse Forrest Gump that where you're like, oh, wow, so Demetheves, like, we're still going, huh? Now we're in England. This movie ended four times. Yeah. Yeah, who did that in a movie?

I was going to say Bradley Cooper and Limitless. Oh, it's the Dirk Diggler. Yes. Jack. Yeah. I can do it again. Yeah. Yeah. All right. A request from Michael Broussard. I love your podcast on the rewatchables. I'm 44. Enjoy listening to you guys talk about films that I love. I've been waiting a long time for you to do the hunt for red October. Many fans and I consider this an important film to cover.

As it was masterfully done with an outstanding cast, please consider this movie for us raging fans. One of my favorite films. So this is just a request. No question. Just do Hunt for Red October. There's a reason we haven't done it yet. Chris knows the reason. Because we're going to go to war with Russia and you're waiting for the right peg. I told you to watch Inside Moves and I would do Hunt for Red October. You didn't fucking watch it. All of 2024. This guy, Michael Broussard, sitting there waiting for us to do Hunt for Red October.

Nope. We have an opportunity for a fun trend every year where Chris and Sean have to make you watch a movie that we do in the rewatchables, and then you have to make the two of them watch a movie that we do in the rewatchables. That's a category coming up. But just so you know. That's what we're hanging on. The greedy overlords of Tubi. I will put it on. And selfish Chris Ryan. And meanwhile, Inside moves on Tubi, at least for now.

I'm going to put it up on Letterboxd. You'll see it when I watch Inside Moves. It's going to be this weekend. You know what? I won't see it because I'm not on Letterboxd. I'll take a screenshot and send it to you. Oh, what CR watch tonight? Theme month suggested from Logan Van Winkle. These names are like nuts. That's because they're all from you. All AI generated.

So this is an interesting theme month. Rotten rewatchables. A month of rewatchables that deserve better on Rotten Tomatoes and currently hold the score of 50% or less. Suggestions. Billy Madison, Ace Ventura, Rat Race. Didn't we do...

Some kind of invert. No, is that on big picture? I can't remember. Did we do some sort of inverted month or something like that? No, I used to do the Rotten Tomatoes scores before Raj. Yeah. And Fantasy would get super upset about it. Yeah. And it was just like, as usual. But now you do Roger Ebert as ChatGPT, which is more offensive than Rotten Tomatoes. Or Brilliant. Depends where you're sitting. Is your dream to replace me and Sean and Craig with actual Siskel and Ebert ChatGPTs? Is that possible? Yeah.

Probably. Yeah, we're a couple years away. I don't mind the idea of Rot Month. I'd have to look to see what movies. There's definitely been some movies that are 50%. Oh, I would like to see the stats on the movies we've done. Like how many below sub-50%ers have we done? A decent amount, I bet.

Do we need like a, like a Billy, who's the guy in Moneyball? Billy Beans assistant? Paul D. Potesta. No, but the fake, the fake composite character. Yeah, Jonah Hill's fake character. We need like a Jonah Hill for the rewatch. A stats guy? Advanced analytics? Yeah, just like an advanced analytics department. There's some really good spreadsheets out there. People, people do the work. We have to, I just have to look them up. Yeah, it would be fun to know the worst rated movie we've ever done.

Well, the most disliked movie ever done was Country Strong. People are still upset. But we did that for your wife, Liz Kelly. The movie's not that bad. People need to relax. People can fuck off. Category idea from Connor Cussin. A suggestion for a new category is When Would I Have Died?

You're the main character or member of a team crew. At what point in the movie do you think you actually would have died? Example in Die Hard, Carl's brother kills me in five seconds. Yeah. Oh, this is good. This is good. Really solid. I have a couple. They're pretty obvious, though. Like, I think I would have swum out after the girl in the first scene of Jaws. Like, I would have just been like... Oh, so you die in Jaws. Immediately, first scene. Yeah.

I'm not making any of the leaps and Raiders in the first with the, with the boulder rolling behind me. Just gets you. Yeah. I just don't have much of a broad jump. Um, then there are moments where I might've died as a bystander, which I really like, which is like my financial advisor is right by the bank robbery and heat. So I can imagine like coming out and be like, I'm really glad I invested in my Roth. Yeah.

That's a good one. What about you? This is a good category. Well, I was thinking about Castaway. Uh-huh. How long I would have toughed it out on the island. Yeah, not knowing what was happening with sports. Forget about family. Just be like, fuck, what's going on in the NBA playoffs right now? Like, chicken, it's April 19th. I wonder who's in round one. Yeah, I think I would have probably attempted what he did with the raft trying to get over way sooner. I'm probably dead within a year.

Um, Amity Vihara was another one. I was thinking I, I, I probably would have stayed in the house too late. Yeah. I mean, you're currently doing it, right? Well, no, we're good. We have a good relationship with the ghost right now. Yeah, it's okay. It's the best it's been. Um, but did you have like a mediator come in? What happened? No, it's good. The ghost likes us. What do you, what do you have? Anything good?

Any zombie apocalypse movie, I'm actually probably just ending it myself. Like, I am legend. There's no way I could get anywhere close to where Will Smith got. First 10 minutes, I'm just ending it. I see one zombie, it's over.

I was thinking, I was saying to my wife, because I told her about this category, because I can't see unless I have contacts or glasses. I was thinking basically everything before 1920, I'm gone. Oh, like you couldn't do. I just can't. Like, yeah. Unforgiven. You're just like. Yeah, I'm just. I'm a blind guy. I'm killed in the saloon. I'm like, what's going on? Is that Will Penny? Oh, that's just drunk Billy. You can't see. I'm just drunk and blind.

My watch says we've gone three miles. This app is like having a personal trainer. Yeah, but those apps collect a lot of your personal data. Aren't you worried? Really? That's creepy. How do I stop that? You should go to privacy.ca.gov to learn about your privacy rights and get on the best path to protect your privacy. You think they could help us get up this next hill? One step at a time. Californians have the strongest privacy protections in the country. Go the extra mile to protect your information. Learn more at privacy.ca.gov.

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Theme month suggestion from Josh Lento. This goes to what we talked about earlier. A different host selects the movie of their choice. Co-host. Each week could be a specific selection of one of the rotating hosts other than Mr. Bill Simmons. Bill has no veto power during this month. I was thinking the theme could be referred to as much to Bill's chagrin. Yeah. I think this is a great idea.

What do you do if on Much to Bill's Chagrin Month we put up, like, insane numbers? Because we do Lord of the Rings. It's just Lord of the Rings 1, 2, and 3. And Lebowski.

It's just every Captain America. I do like this idea. Would you be on these much to Bill Shaboon? Yeah. I'm just hosting playing point guard, but. But would you be like Julius Randall and like ruining the vibe and like not passing? No, I'd never do the Julius Randall. I don't think you should host if you haven't seen it though, right? Somebody else has to host it. No, I'd have to watch it. Right, but then it should be still Chris hosting Lord of the Rings. Oh, good idea. Yeah, so it's Chris or Sean. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, that's... It's still the three of you, but just their hosting. But if Van wanted to do one. Or Van, whoever. So basically, if it's your movie, you have to host the pod. Yeah, but there's a lot of thought that goes into this because you want to pick one that he would never pick, but that he would still be a good sport to watch and be into. Or you could make him watch Avengers Endgame. But there are a bunch of movies that I know you want to do, but you're pacing yourself for, right?

Yeah. But it would be, I mean, what was the twin? Twin Towers. Twin Towers, that one. It's the two towers. Two towers. I haven't seen it either. Would I have to see the first one before the second one? Like how prepped am I? Yeah, you should probably see the first one. So maybe it's like no sequels? Yeah. Yeah, that's good. No sequels.

So you do like some sort of UK crime thing that- It'd be great if you, Sean, and Van just chose the three Lord of the Rings movies in a row. Yeah, I mean, I would probably pick something like Hot Fuzz or Ex Machina or something like that. Like, they're not that far out. So I'm just on the pod. I'm like the fourth co-host. And occasionally I have a couple points. Right. But the point is not to pick- Most of the time I'm just like, oh man.

Why this fucking crime drama in the UK? People would love that. That's like when you invite me on to do, I think I came on with you guys to do Alive, right? Didn't I do that movie with you guys? Yeah. Yeah, it'll be like that. I hadn't seen it before. That movie changed your life. It did. Altruistic cannibalism. Another theme month idea from Mitchell Moore, who says, thank you for the rewatchables and all the laughs and insights you provide each week. We really appreciate all the emails, by the way. My suggestion for a new category is unwatchables month.

A group of movies you've mentioned multiple times that you know don't work, but you can't help watching. The list is as follows. Bugsy, Indian Summer, Another 48 Hours, Angel Heart. I really resented that he didn't do Angel Heart. I gotta say, these are pretty watchable movies. I don't love Bugsy, but I don't think it's... It's basically the flawed rewatchables concept. Yeah. Yeah.

But I think we should probably bring that back in 2020. I think we need to do the canceled rewatchables month. That's the, that's such a good idea. Yeah. Another theme month idea from Amy Fleischer. She's calling it shit goes sideways very quickly. Adventures in babysitting empire records. Go don't tell mom. The babysitter's dead. I'm throwing in long kiss. Good night. It's like this too, but that that's shit goes sideways. I would also throw after hours in there. Yeah. Yeah. Decent idea. Yeah.

So this is from Logan in Hawaii. He says, Aloha, rewatchables. His category idea is how would Van Lathan get out of this one? It was a great impromptu moment during Den of Thieves, the Reden of Thieves, when Chris Ryan asked Van Lathan how he'd excuse himself out of an accidental text. Mr. Lathan Jr.'s response was very entertaining and would be a great addition should opportunity allow him to give him rewatch. I like that. Yeah. Like how would you get out of, if you were Karen,

Hill, how would you get out of flushing all the cocaine when Henry comes home from jail? Right. Just like that was all the money we had. Would you? You know, it's like I don't want to live in a world where we have to sell cocaine just to make ends meet. You know? Yeah. What was the right move for her there?

Probably just to be like, what do you want? The cops were searching the house. Did you want to go away for like federal drug possession? The move is she should probably just leave. Yeah. How good would you be at flushing cocaine down the toilet? What is the best way to dispose of it? Like to disappoint it? They always shake it and then the cocaine just gets everywhere. You really gotta like, it's more about how you open the bag and-

No one's ever flushing cocaine down the toilet in a patient way. You know, like it's usually if you're flushing it down the toilet, I think it's because... You have seconds. I think the DA is outside. Would the toilet really flush that well with all the cocaine in it? Where else are you going, though? You can't go sink or shower or something. This is a great YouTube series. Is Chris and Bill try things that they've seen in movies? Well, I worry when I like put gum in the toilet. I'm like, is that thing going to flush? But like two kilos of cocaine just in 10 flushes? Oh, God. Feels like... I don't know. Yeah.

Greg, why don't you go get us a kilo of cocaine? Get us some fake coke. I need 24 hours. Question from Juergen Anderson. Two S's. Hi, have a question for you. Who is Diane Waiters? Do you think Juergen's from the States? I don't. I do not. Okay. This got me thinking, though. We should probably explain who Diane Waiters is. Did he say Diane? Yeah, he said Diane Waiters. That's fair. Because Diane Waiters now has not played for how many years?

We've discussed replacing the name Dion Waiters with a different player, right? Yeah, I mean, I think that Dion specifically works for the movies that we love to talk about and it's a celebration. I was thinking that there is like a Sam Darnold award that we could give out to somebody who has like an incredible three quarters of a movie. Oh, and then just falls apart. Or it's like they're only good in this movie, like Michael Madsen and Tarantino films or something. Yeah, that's good.

I'm only good in this system. Like system. Yeah. System roles. It's like people who are only good in Sorkin or only good in Paul Thomas Anderson movies or whatever. Yeah. Like John Michael Higgins and the Christopher Guest movies. The Sam Darnold reward is really interesting.

Is that for the movie or a character? It could also be for their career. I think it's character who only works in this movie or actor who only works in this movie or with this director. But Sam Darnold's a different one. That's like you were doing good for a while and then the wheels came off. Unless you just want to treat it as he was great with Kevin O'Connell in this system. And then we would have to do the Kevin O'Connell press conference afterwards where he's just like, I just wish him the best on his journey. Anyway, DM Waiters, he played 418 NBA games. He was a lottery pick for Cleveland.

He was a 2013 draft. I think it was the fourth or fifth. He came out of high school. No, he spent. Yeah. He was at Syracuse. He peaked at 15.9 a game on a crappy 2014 Cavs team before LeBron came back, bounced around, went to OKC Miami, finished with the Lakers.

But the reason we named the heat check after him was because sometimes he would just come in and make everything. The microwave. He'd come in and in like three minutes he would have 10 points. So the idea of Deion Waiters was better than Deion Waiters because most of the time he would come in and miss a couple threes. Then every once in a while Deion Waiters heat check would happen. So I guess the question is do we dump Deion Waiters for a more modern heat check guy? Do you feel like there is a comparable modern equivalent to Deion?

I feel like this guy has gotten a little bit legislated out of the game. The Dan Waiter. Yeah. The Lou Williams. I came in and I dropped 21 in 18 minutes, but I can't play defense. And you know, I mean the, the, so Cam Thomas is one, but I don't know what his shelf life is going to be. Peyton Pritchard's a good one these days. Cause Peyton Pritchard's either three points or 28. I was legitimately like, who's Peyton Pritchard for a second. Uh,

I don't know. The Dion, though, it feels like we're kind of stuck with it. It's such a staple of the show. He's an icon of our pod. Yeah. All right. I think I agree. But we can add Sam Darnold just to mix it up. I do like the system actor idea. Here's a heat question from Harley. I don't know if Harley's last name or first name. How many houses does Neil McCauley have and where are they?

So he writes down the house with no furniture where Chris sleeps is clearly modern, sleek, and by the water, maybe Malibu. Yeah, it's Malibu colony. When he meets Edie at the cafe, he says he lives up here. So maybe that's Hollywood Hills. They go to the house, stand on the balcony, great view. It seems too expensive to be a rental. Also well furnished. Then he leaves her that morning. So was he leaving her alone at his house? Was that her rental or his?

Chris Ryan, I gave you a heads up on this question. So what's the real estate in here? Neil lives in Malibu. He lives on the beach. When he says, I live up here, he's joking because she goes, that's really funny. I think he's alluding to the idea that he lives upstairs from the restaurant. Ah, okay.

There's a couple of times where he says things to Edie that are like probably purposely to like lead her astray if she was ever questioned by the police. Like I think he says he's from the Bay, you know, stuff like that, that he did time in the Bay, but he's not from there. And so I think that the house that they sleep in that first night is a rental.

And A, it's movie magic, so obviously people's houses are usually nicer in the movies and TV. And B, it was the 90s, so maybe Edie could get a decent place in the hills that had a good view. So that's Edie's place that he leaves her at. So what part of the hills do we think that's in? I thought maybe Beachwood or kind of like that area. Then where do we think the guy who fucks them over

And then he shoots him through the TV when he's watching a hockey game. What's that guy's name? Oh, yeah. Van Zant? Yeah, Van Zant. Where was his house? Because he's climbing up a canyon on that one. That had to be how it was. So we only think one house for Neil. Yeah. And probably renting. Yeah. He probably rents a year at a time. Maybe an apartment in the South Bay. Kind of get away. I could see him having a safe house. Like a- Torrance? Yeah. Think he has a burner room like Raheem? Yeah.

Definitely. What's the burner room? Raheem had his burner room. He talks about it in Vegas. He has a burner room. It's this hotel room and then a burner room. I don't know what that means. What is a burner room? It's a second room. For what? For whatever you need. It's a second room. If you want to take somebody back. My apartment has three burner rooms then, I guess. Burner room. He didn't elaborate. Oh, man. They just say Joe House has been talking about it ever since. New category from Matt Hennessey. This is wonderful. In honor of Alec Baldwin's Captain George Elbrey from The Departed,

It's the two weeks with pay award for the movie character who should have been fired from their job. This is the Vincent Chase award, right? Yeah. Are we sure this character is good at their job? Yeah, so we'd have to lose Vincent Chase for this? I think we could put George Ellerbee in for Vincent Chase, yeah. Is it time? Vincent Chase 20-year anniversary? I don't know. Entourage is coming to Netflix. I feel it. We might have to keep it around. He had examples. The Mayor from Jaws, the Italian detective team, and the talented Mr. Ripley, and all the employees of Empire Records.

Empire Records is coming up a lot in this mailbag. I know. A lot of people like Empire Records. 30th anniversary coming up. Might be on the schedule. A theme month from Jen Dux, who says she's a longtime listener and loves the podcast. She had a quick category idea. Best FanDuel line odds as we're doing something. I guess it would be what were the FanDuel live odds for, you know,

Oh yeah, what are the odds that Neil... That Neil's about to kill Wayne Grove. Yeah, that he just stays in the car. It's easy just to use heat as the prism for all these possible categories. Best fan, no line odds. How long does Chris stay together with the Ashley Jackson character? What were the odds Charlene was just going to let Chris enjoy this night? Right, right.

Anyway, he asked when is Philly month or she asked when is Philly month going to happen? You've teased some Philly movies. Silver Linings Playbook last year was great. I think there's plenty of meat left. What's on the Philly Mount Rushmore that hasn't been done yet? Well, we've done a bunch. Jen suggested Witness, which I think is in, it's being scouted. At close range is Lancaster, but it's still an awesome movie. And then after that, we pretty much just have 12 monkeys left.

So we did Philadelphia, we did Trading Places, we did Blow Up. Silver Linings. Which I think were three of, and then Silver Linings. And Rocky. So we've done some already. And Rocky. Well, we haven't done Rocky 1 and we haven't done Rocky 2. Oh. Yeah, only three and four. Yeah. Keeping people guessing. Yeah, we did Creed. Yep. Did Creed Live. There's probably a couple others we forgot. Yeah. What was that Vigilante movie with Tom Skerritt?

Fighting Back. That was in Philly. Was it? Yeah. Tubi. Greedy motherfuckers of Tubi. Fun idea from Andrew Rowan. Two A's. I think a good category to add when you're doing a crime heist cop movie is where does the inevitable are you a cop scene rank? Yeah. Compared to Den of Thieves, Departed, Fast and Furious. Yeah.

In general, I think the next time we do one of these movies, we really have to, they need a bunch of special categories. It would be fun to apply this to like Grand Budapest Hotel though. Are you a fucking cop? I was thinking of the heist movie staples. They're on to us. Yeah. Are you a cop?

Nobody's ever broken into this bank before. Yeah. We're here for the bank's money, not yours. And I need to know right now, are you in? Also five things that have to be in every, I do this job and then I'm out. Yeah. One last job for sure. Yeah. One last job. Yeah. Still feel like we can write one of these reader idea from Ryan McCabe. Rewatchables is the best podcast available. He praises us for a little bit here. One of the categories that needs to be improved is the CR thinks Luke Wilson hottest take. You have great ideas.

But as a longtime Simmons fan, thank you, and supporter of mailbags.

They've consistently taught me that your fans have the craziest and best hottest takes. That's legitimately how every great mailbag was built in the old days. He's correct. The emails were great. Tie this to the old fans. Call it the mailbag hottest take. Solicit hot takes from readers and present those for commentary. Y'all do a fine job, but I know readers and listeners would kill this. I'm not against this idea. There's only one. You do have to release the movie a week in advance. This really is like it comes down to one man. Yeah.

Well, I don't think we could do. I don't think you can leak the movie ahead of time because then we're getting all these ideas that would fuck up the podcast. So one thing we could do is on the next show. They can also send them to me. As a special like Wednesday YouTube thing, we could read out the reader Luke Wilson hottest. Maybe that's what we do. I like the idea of hot takes from readers about movies we've done. I think it's a good idea.

Yeah. You don't want anybody getting in your airspace when you're thinking about... Well, you could have them email me and I could go through them. I'm always really hesitant of going on if there's a 500 post thread about the movie. I want to come up with my own ideas on the movie and I always feel like that screws me up. And then I'm like, that was on Reddit. It's like, fuck.

Uh, from James Rowe. He's a day one rewatchables fan. His, his trilogy, Holy Trinity is Godfather Armageddon in the town. I have an idea that while I don't think it works as a rewatchables category is perfect for a bill and CR segment, a fantasy draft between bill and CR of hype moves, heist movie crew members to build your own crew for heist five round draft snake order one crew leader, best friend, road dog to role players. Fifth pick is the first to die. Um,

Did you prep this? Well, we decided we were, instead of doing a draft. We want to challenge ourselves. Yeah, we're going to try to come up with a heist crew together. So the ringleader has to be Neil McCauley, right? He's all-time number one. Are we just doing Michael Mann movies or is this from any film? I think we do anything. I think we do everything. Okay. McCauley's number one. Yeah. He's the signal caller. Okay. Which is funny because he honestly does not live through his heist ultimately. Uh-huh. You know, so it's like he is 0-1 as far as the movies go. Is there a Doug McCrae case?

Who would you rather take orders from? Neil McCauley. Yeah, me too. I feel like he knows his shit. I think you need somebody who's less about the violence and more about the smarts. Let's make a rule that you can only draft one guy from a movie.

Or all the guys from one movie Then who's the fucking size for her? Well who's The number two guy I think has to be Jem right? Who's your road dog is definitely Jem Yeah So now we have a movie with Neal McCauley and Jem I will make an argument Road dog could be Rust from the Ocean's movies Really really good road dog It's a good one Maybe even more fun than Jem Jem gets you in a lot of fights Jem gets you in a lot of trouble

What do we do about, like, can Merriman not be the lead guy, but also be in the crew anyway? Well, in truth, not just oil Den of Thieves. He's not really the lead guy in Den of Thieves. It just gets revealed at the end that that was always Donnie. Right, true. So yeah, Merriman could be third. All right, so far we have Neil McCauley and Jem. You want to throw Ocean's Eleven in there too? Yeah, let's do Rust and Merriman for three and four. I really need Sizemore in here from Heat.

Kind of a wild card. I just need him. What was his name in the movie? I'm blanking. Chris Scher... No, not Scherlis. That wasn't... Whatever his name was. It was Chirito. Chirito. Yeah.

Who blew it all by just calling one guy slick when everybody had just been blown up, but somehow remember that little detail. Yeah. You gotta get the phone book. Do it anyway. Because he needs to be in this so he can have his one big scene. His blinking. I need a one big scene for my number four guy. Sure. I need some size of them. Okay. So let's lose Merriman for Chirito then.

Yeah, I don't know how Merriman and Chirito would interact. Feels like there'd be some alpha dog stuff with them. Little Russell Wilson, Justin Fields. It's like, whose corner is this? Rust is good because he'll keep everybody calm. He's kind of in a non-violent crime. All he's doing is eating nachos in the back and kind of hanging out. So he's in a great suit. Do we need, is there a wisecracking guy for like the four spot? Yeah, I was thinking maybe Buscemi from Reservoir Dogs.

Oh, that's good. Yeah. That is good. Just to bring a little firecracker energy. Yeah. I think that's what some of these movies miss is the one funny. I was trying to make this case with Ben and Thieves, but somebody who's keeping it light. And then the driver is who? Gosling from Drive. That's pretty good. Yeah.

Baby Driver, Ansel Elgort. I'm going to go Gosling. Yeah. Can we take cops and put them in the heist? Sure. You want them to be on the wrong side of the law or you just want them chasing the thieves? I don't know if you've seen this movie, but it's Miami Vice. It came out in 2006. I have. I really like Jamie Foxx's performance in that movie. Me too. And I feel like he could have been good guy or bad guy with the way he plays it.

I almost feel like he could have just been the driver, like the Haysburg character. Yeah. Do we have any room for Gong Li, for Isabella to be in here? To be as like the love interest? Yeah. So who's like your number one heist love interest? Gong Li is basically just saying over and over again that there wasn't enough time. Time's luck. I got to be honest. Lively? I got to say lively. Yeah. Now we're talking.

If I'm being completely real, it's lively. But who's lively dating out of the crew? Well, that's the fun part. Is that maybe she's got something with one of the guys, but Neil's always loved her. And she gets eyes on Rust. Yeah. And it's over. All right, we'll keep workshopping this. The important thing is that Neil has to- Wait, did we pick a first guy to die? Oh, that's a good one. Yeah, we get- Belushi from Thief always had that energy, you know?

It's big doofus. There's no way this guy's making it to the 50-minute mark of the movie. Well, the guy in the town, the guy who gets his head shot off when he's driving, the tattoo guy. But he lasted, I guess, till the end. Theme Months from Josh Brill. Comeback Month. Much-needed hits that brought a star back in the conversation, like The Wrestler or The Nightingale Professor. Underrated Month.

The Other Guys, Great White Hype, Outside Providence, Popstar. Comedy classics, that's easy. In Honor of SNL's 50th, maybe do something for that. That might be on the agenda. And then Oscar movies I thought was interesting. Yeah. Best Pictures. Best Picture Winners. Best Picture Winner Month. Yeah. Best Picture Winner Month. Because when else are we doing like Network or One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest? Yeah. I would do Network whenever. Terms of Endearment? Yeah. Did that win? Out of Africa. Yeah.

New category from Eric Ritvo. This is great. This is going right in. The Don Dawson Sasha Jenkins Award from Dazed and Confused for the actor in the film that you cannot believe didn't become a bigger star. So you would have Dana Willer Nicholson. Fletch. Yeah, be your number one. Mine would be Lisa Elbecker. Wow, that's a good one. But I like naming a category after Don Dawson. It could also be the, who's the guy in Swingers who we never saw again?

Oh, yeah, the third guy. Sue. Oh, yeah, not Ron Livingston, but the other guy. Patrick Van Horn as Sue. Yeah. And he was just never in another movie? It's like, what happened to that guy? I do like capturing, and it feels like a cousin of the that guy. Like, why weren't you more of a thing? Yeah, Linklater movies are really good for that. Yeah. Because he's so good at casting, but then those people are not always, like, super professional. I think we add that to the hodgepodge. Yeah. Where somebody could...

Agree to do that. A plea from Felix K. It's come to this. I'm a 50-year-old man emailing a podcast to request a movie that should have been done a long time ago. Sorry. Scarface! What am I missing? Seems like a no-brainer. This is not my fault. You can say Hunt for October is my fault. There's some that are just, you know, on ice in the refrigerator waiting to be done. We're doing Scarface at some point. Are there any movies that we've done, say, in 2024 that you were like, I wish we had done that earlier?

To open the door for doing it yet again. Yeah later. Hmm. We probably should have done pulp earlier You might build up in your head I also think there are so many movies that you guys did in like 2017 18 that were so good you came out so hot for the first 15 20 movies there's a banger after banger after banger the no But a lot of you didn't have the categories for those you could bring all those back. Yeah, there's some good ones like point break and speed and speed

New category from Josh Ramshaw. The Kyle Bran Award for Is This Movie Better as a Menachem Golan Production. Really solid. Probably not out of that category, but a great show. I would like to add that I would love to do the 80s action...

trailer voice for movies that would like what would be the most inappropriate use of 80s action trailer voice like we're doing Philadelphia yeah like Remains of a Day he's just a butler but what if Manchester by the Sea yeah that's good he's lost everything but he gained it all back maybe that should be added to the director's commentary of the sports announcers like should 80s action voice be there from Eric Hoover

This isn't a suggestion. It's more a fact, but I thought it was interesting. After listening to the Friday Night Lights episode, I would love to submit a nominee to dethrone the undisclosed truck stop coin toss. He's a lifelong racing fan. He says the 1969 coin toss between Ogden Phipps, Claiborne Farms owner, horse racing royalty, and Penny Chenery was the most important in sports history. And what happened was...

The 1969, I'll skim it through, but the 1969 breeding season, this horse called Chicada did not conceive. Cicada, Chicada. Cicada, yeah. Cicada? Do you know this story? No, I know cicadas, the insect. Only one foal was due in the spring of 1970. The winner of the coin toss would receive...

One fall, the first choice in 69. The loser would get second choice in 69, the lone fall of 1970. Ogden Phipps wins the toss. This is how we'll decide who gets to pick the movie the other people have to watch. We'll do a coin toss live on camera. Ogden Phipps wins the toss, gets something royal, 1969. Chenery gets the second choice in 69 in the 1970 fall, Secretariat. Mm-hmm.

And he says, imagine losing a coin toss and ending up with Tom Brady, Michael Jordan, Babe Ruth, and Secretariat. That's got to be the best coin toss. I always thought it was Neil Walker, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar in the 1969 NBA draft. But no. New category from Pat in Wisconsin.

Best application to a high school lesson plan. And he says, for years, my colleagues, former colleagues, and I have utilized movie clips or entire movies into our instruction as social studies teachers. Examples, U.S. history, there will be blood, U.S. oil boom. Argo, Iranian hostage crisis. Pulp fiction, jewels in the robbers and diners, a metaphor for U.S. and German tensions following the Zimmerman note.

Is that true? I don't know, but it just seems like this guy wanted to show Pulp Fiction to his class. Crime and justice. Catch me if you can. White collar crime. Psychology. Rain Man. What about Bob? Memento. Mean Girls. The Strawberry Daiquiri Scene. Philosophy. Groundhog Day. Um...

I don't think this works as a category, but I really appreciate the spirit behind it. Yeah. Using movies to connect with high school kids who don't want to be in your class and are probably on their phone. That's right. I used to have an eighth grade history teacher who would show movies from different historical eras than the ones that we were studying. And it was clear that he just needed a class off. He'd be like, we're doing the colonial American revolution. Let's watch Spartacus. Right.

Yeah, throw on the rewatchables for the students, you know? This is the best idea of all the ideas, and sadly, we probably won't be able to do it. It's a new category idea from Colin W. A few years ago, I was jokingly brought up to have a category where you call Rosillo and ask what he thinks of the film being discussed. Just live on air. I feel like we as listeners have missed out on more than a few gem takes from RR by this having been implemented in the podcast.

This would be an incredible category. Does Russillo like this movie? What's Russillo's take? Calling Russillo unprompted and unannounced. If he doesn't answer, he doesn't answer. I don't know why we don't do this. This is my favorite idea we've ever had. This is by far the best idea. So we just put him on speaker and just call him if he answers, he answers. I'm like, hey, Friday Night Lights, what are your thoughts? Does Russillo have the highest batting average

on the rewatchables in terms of like appearances to the amount of incredible moments. Yeah, it's almost like we don't want to book him anymore. Right. Town, Vision Quest, Wolf of Wall Street, is that it? Deliverance. Yeah. Margin Call. I think he's done like five or six. Deliverance. That was his choice. I like this Rusillo idea though. We're going to have to try. Yeah. So good. We should try it right now. Let's pick a movie. So we'll do Before Sunrise later this month.

Call. We just call him and he's like, ah, Ethan Hawke, fucking movie sucked. New category. I thought Jesse could have done better than her, man. I really like this next idea too. New category idea from Thomas P. Is this movie perfect in that does it accomplish its stated goal? For example, Dazed and Confused attempts to capture the beginning of summer in 1976 in a small town. Can you imagine a better version included in the soundtrack?

Does the actor playing Mitch take it from perfect to almost perfect? The answer is yes. Other perfect movie candidates. Stand by me. Devil Wears Prada. Die Hard. Not necessarily the best movie ever, but movies that perfectly achieve their goal. Love this. I love this idea. It's a great idea. And my wife. It's a better way to rate movies. Yeah. My wife had Devil Wears Prada on, which we've watched a bunch of. It's one of the most rewatchable movies the last 20 years, I think.

And I was watching it. I was like, this is like a no-hitter of a movie for whatever it was trying to do. Yeah, it wouldn't change a single thing. The plot makes sense. Even Adrian Grenier as the boyfriend is hilarious because he's so bad. Yeah. So I like the idea of did this movie achieve its ceiling? It's also cool for movies that are like

B plus, B minus movies generally, but for what it was doing, you couldn't have improved it really. No, the Sandlot is a 10 out of 10. It did exactly what it needed to do. So do you think this is, where would we put this in the episode? I think you would do after Who Won the Movie. Yeah, Who Won the Movie and Is This Movie Perfect? Or right before Who Won the Movie. Yeah, I like that one. Top of the pot idea from Katie Mount.

This is another good one. I would love it if you all added a food and drink recommendation to accompany the film we're supposed to be rewatching. My husband and I plan our weeks around rewatching and listening to your podcasts. Oh, that's nice. That's nice. So it would immensely help my meal planning. I already have a steak on a paper plate planned for rewatching Den of Thieves.

but still decide between a box of wine or champagne or beer to go with it. Oh, man. I would go. That's an interesting one. Yeah. So what's the, what's heat? We got to go back to heat. So what's the food and drink for heat?

The chicken, because remember, he's like, I'm sorry if the chicken got overcooked. Was overcooked. So, overcooked rotisserie chicken for heat. So, were you just picking an item from the movie, or is it whatever you feel like is the perfect pair? I took it as, like, the mood for the movie. Oh, so, yeah, because that's interesting, because, like, for instance, for Blair Witch, you would do basically, like, gas station snack banquet, like...

Jerky, Doritos, you know, Dr. Pepper, everything that they get out of the gas stations, which you would eat during that. You'd feel like shit afterwards, though. I think the problem with this category, which I really liked, is it's really up to the person. They know what the movie is. Take it from there. 60% of them are also, should I be smoking during this? No.

This never quite got here, but Luke B thought we should do a Brad Stevens Award for the best basketball lineup you could possibly make for the movie. Oh, that's fun. Yeah. Guys, you slot five characters into roles, positions, and a starting lineup. He said, for instance, Neil's crew from Heat. Neil's the point guard. He's a Chris Paul type. Chris is the gunslinging shooting guard.

Trejo's the bruising meta world piece, Corey Maggette type, and Sizemore's a Horace Grant, Serge Ibaka, David West, traditional Swiss Army Knife power forward. I like that this dude stopped watching basketball in 2011. You know, just like Ibaka and David West. He's like a Luol Deng. Trending topics today. They're Corey Maggette in there? This is a good one for an ensemble movie to put together a basketball team.

So like Friday Night Lights we just did. Yeah. So Riggins was what? Riggins is like a banger. He's like a rebounder. He's like a under size four. Saracen's like a 5'9 point guard. He's like Jose Alvarado. Boobie Miles shooting guard. Boobie Miles is like the Kobe. He goes down. Category tweak from John Wolfe. This is great. A cousin of the Mally Rubin did this movie need a better sex scene.

I thought of this during the Redentive Thieves pod. Didn't we need a scene where Pablo, 50, and crew play a pickup basketball game against Butler and the sheriffs? Then he asked, didn't Shotcaller need a better sports scene? We get no prison ball. Couldn't Goodfellas have fitted in a softball scene like they're playing for the Deli team? Basically,

How do you have shoehorned a sports scene into this movie for no reason? The best version of this is American History X when we have the Helter Skelter pickup basketball game. I was watching Maverick again the other day and the football scene with two footballs is just like in the movie theater. You're like, what are they doing? Even though it's basically the volleyball scene for the first one. Yeah. It's so awesome. Yeah.

It's just such a chill hangout. I think we keep this in our back pocket. I think you could work this into every movie. How can we shoehorn a sports scene into this? You guys have to come up with one. I think it's great. So before sunrise? A little five-a-side soccer? Yeah, he all of a sudden is...

Yeah, I mean, looking at these movies, like, body double. Is he, like, going to play racquetball one day? That's a good one. Instead of acting class, racquetball gets claustrophobic.

It's too much. It's too tight in there. We should test drive that one. That's a good idea. This would work, I think. What are they playing in Hereditary? Oh, man. What would they be in Hereditary? And you have to kind of make it work. That's a school football game where they go and something scary happens. But I would just love it if Toni Collette was just like, why don't we settle this out on the court? Just like dunking on her son. Well, Great Santini had all those great basketball scenes in that. You've never seen that one.

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These are really good. He wants us to add the Jason Tatum, he's only 19, breakout star award. Yeah. Someone who obviously jumps off the screen. That doesn't happen enough. The Nick Saban Offensive Coordinator Referral Award, an open opportunity to give out references of comparable films. If you enjoyed this movie, I recommend you also watch this. We could just call that recommended if you like. Well, we could- It's got double features similar to that, right? Yeah. Yeah, but maybe-

Is that better than double feature? If you like this movie, try this. Or does Tubi do that? The greedy overlords. Evil Tubi. It's the next recommendation on the algorithm award. Yeah. Next algorithmic recommendation. And then he says he wants us to change the title of the Kid Cudi Pursuit of Happiness needle drop.

He said, the ringer dramatically overestimates the importance of Project X and culture to that. Disagree. We underestimate it. Yeah, I disagree too. He said he offered the Johnny Depp's Black Betty airport walk and blow. That's definitely not happening. It's really funny that you think Black Betty and blow is bigger than the Project X one. He did offer the Billy Bats Atlantis beatdown in Goodfellas. That's fucking incredible. Pretty solid. But we're not getting rid of Kid Cudi. New category from James Winston. Thought this was Jameis Winston for a second. Yeah.

The I used to fuck guys like you in prison award for the wildest, oddest, most fucked up line of dialogue in the movie. We'll keep it in mind. Yeah. Can you see some of these? I didn't think I sent some of these to you. I can see them. How do you see them? You sent the whole thing to me. Oh, I did? I didn't mean to. I only meant to send you like seven. Yeah. No, you sent them all to me. Oh, shit. I really fucked up. I meant to only send you seven. Well, I'm not like following along. I have no idea where you're going with these. New category from Daniel in Mexico.

How about a category called, would this movie work in another genre? Example, Tropic Thunder is a survival drama, Rosemary's Baby is a comedy, or Mrs. Doubtfire is a horror thriller film. So they did that with The Shining with the family dramedy, the Torrences. I like when they recut trailers. Yeah. I often think about how this movie would be different if Curb Your Enthusiasm music was playing. There's a great one, Mrs. Doubtfire is a horror film on YouTube. Oh, is there? Yeah, a trailer. That's good.

A burning question from Robert G. This is good. You've given the opportunity to have either Cruz or Hanks on for rewatchables as your co-host. You can do a movie they've been in, a movie the other's been in, or a movie of your choice. Who's a better co-host? What movie are you doing? Is the play for them, one of them to come on, a movie you haven't done yet that's theirs, like Cruz for All the Right Moves or Hanks for Turner and Hooch? Or is it more interesting to talk about a movie the other one's in?

Personally, I think a re-cruising with Cruz is the only choice. So this is a good question. As a co-host, Cruz or Hanks?

So it's almost like a subcategory for Cruiser Hanks. I think that Hanks would be able to kind of go in different places and riff with you and talk about... I think Hanks... Let's be honest. Hanks is a better cover. Yeah, but the huge tell us incredible stories about the production of the films that he's been in. Even if he hasn't been in it. Just the entertainment factor is so much higher if Tom Cruise is sitting next to you. Like,

Hanks is better as a podcaster. Like he could hang in with all of these. Do we know the crews can't hang in as a podcaster? Cruise from a, I can't believe this is happening standpoint is better. The upside of cruise is higher.

If we're doing like Before Sunrise with Cruise and he just fucking goes on a tangent about when he filmed Mission Impossible 5 in France. Yeah, he's like, I've been to Vienna. You may remember it from Mission Impossible 1. He's just acting weird and doing Cruise stuff. It's Cruise. It's not even close. I'm going to go Cruise. Yeah. I would feel safer with Hanks.

But what does that even mean? That the pod won't be a disaster? No, I just feel like it would be a safer bet to be a good pod. There's a Cruz version of the pod. Yeah, like there's a Cruz thing where you make too many cigarette jokes and he's like, cigarettes are poison. You know, like he gets really mad at you.

We also had Robert G. also said, you need to get Berthon on for Sicari or the account rewatchable as co-host along with CR. If CR can muster up the courage to do Wayne Jenkins with Berthon on the pod, keep it. Otherwise, you got to retire it. I disagree. From James McGowan, I'm slightly older than you.

That's my line. But I'm sure you remember the CBS late movie. If the outlaw Josie Wills or Kelly's Heroes was playing, I was staying up. You could do an old school broadcast TV rewatchables month. I also love the Hollywood nights. I think that would be tough. So what would be some examples of movies from that era? It's all the Westerns. Okay. It's towering Inferno movies like that. Poseidon Adventure. Yeah. Poseidon Adventure.

I don't know. Those movies are pretty tough to watch now. Yeah. I tried to watch Poseidon Adventure. It's rough. Hackman's in that, right? Yeah, there's a lot of good people and it's like, ah, this should be good. And 20 minutes in and you're like, they can't get Shelley Winters up on a cliff. Oh yeah, I forgot about that. She's like, leave me here. Oh my God. Really rough.

A tweak from Mark McGowan. Big fan of the pot, he says. On the Redentive Thieves show this week, you threw out drinking milk from the carton for Apex Mountain. I want to submit the scene from Terminator 2 when the T-1000 kills John's foster dad through the milk carton while he's drinking from it. Who knew the T-1000 cared so much about proper hygiene and etiquette? What did we say the best one? We said Anchorman, right? How do you beat an Anchorman for drinking milk out of the... We haven't done Anchorman yet. We haven't. It's on the list.

Was that 04? Yeah. Missed the anniversary. Category section from Mark C. Where would you cast Philip Seymour Hoffman? This is a great one. Honestly, no movie that he couldn't improve marginally. So maybe every movie we just try to figure out what part he would have played? Yeah, like Godfather 3. Could he have been a cardinal? Why not? I really like this one. That's good. So maybe it's right after Cruiser Hanks? Yeah. We'll test drive it. Where would you cast Philip Seymour Hoffman? Yeah, we'll test drive it. It'd be tough to do it before Sunrise.

New category from Kevin Paulman. The sideways. I'm not drinking any fucking Merlot award for life imitating art presented when something ridiculous in the movie unexpectedly gains a cult following and becomes a bonafide thing. Examples. Sideways. When Miles' Merlot tantrum arguably torpedoed Merlot sales for years and counting, which we talked about a lot. Office space. The rise of the red swing line stapler. Big Lebowski. Jeff Bridges turning into the dude in real life.

Rounders, the Poker Boom and Empire Records, Rex Manning Day, another Empire Records. There's not enough times this happens, but I like the spirit behind it.

My favorite part is Jeff Bridges turning into the dude, which I think actually happened. Yeah, you could do what should have been trending out of this movie. Like, what trend should this movie have started? Right. You know, should Goodfellas have started a Layla revival or something? You know what I mean? Did Jaws significantly affect people going into the ocean? Yes. I was terrified of the ocean. Yeah, it's affected Bill. It really did. I remember walking by the ocean the next summer and being like,

being afraid to go in category tweak from Mike Roy Lance this is great he says he thinks he's listening to every rewatchables episode he wants to lose evil laughing Ramon Raymond people hate Ramon Raymond yeah we're good I saw Andy Garcia out the other night no way yeah he's like are you the fucking asshole who does the rewatchables he wants us to replace Ramon Raymond with Wilford Brimley from the firm he says it's the hardest he's ever laughed listening to a pod I think we need more Brimley

If we had Daniel Plainview and- And Wolfer Brimley? For 2025, we're in pretty good shape. Yeah, that's good. Who do we drop? Ramon Raymond and- Have we ever done Philip Baker Hall? No, we can drop him. Okay. Yeah. It's always funny to say his words last. Yeah. Philip Baker Hall. What was Brimley's character in the firm? Did he have a name? Yeah, he did. Tell you what it brings, Mitch. Heartache. Random question from RoF. William Devisher was his name. Oh, okay.

Do you think movie theaters should invest more resources in auditoriums and anniversary movies and also feature more old school rewatchable movies? What do you think, Craig? You're a younger guy who likes to go out and do stuff. I think... Do you like going to Alamo Drafthouse? I've actually never been to an Alamo Drafthouse. They're opening one on the west side, I heard. Yeah, we just saw, I mean, they put Interstellar out.

last month and it was huge and among like everybody i know people were thrilled to go back and see it but is that an la thing or is that an around the country i think it did uh really well like wasn't it like in the top 10 box office or whatever is that true yeah i think they're out on imax i think there is a thirst for that for people to go re-experience what something could have felt like 15 years ago when it came out because that's not seven is on is on imax imax right now and i was like oh yeah

Because it's something you can't recreate. I mean, I don't know about really old movies, but movies like of the 2000s that kids who are 20 years old now wish they could have seen. I think that works. I think it's a thing. Chris had a good point about Seven. Probably not a theater you want to be in with the other people there. It's just you and 17 guys by themselves.

That's a good category. What's like the worst movie audience you'd want to be with? Exactly. I think I told this story in the rewatchables when I saw Henry Portrait of a Serial Killer by myself in Boston at the BU theater. Was there anybody else at the theater? There was like eight other guys and we were all kind of like monitoring each other. We were like, what are you...

What are you up to? Everyone like separated perfectly by six seats kind of watching. Worst movie to see with your parents or your in-laws? That's another good one. Oh, yeah. One night we were like in the last week, should we watch Enora? And I was like, no. Enora's in the top. That would be way up there. We skip the first hour and then we can come in. The first shot of Enora, you're like, I don't want to watch this with my mom. I would say number one would be Monster's Ball. Okay.

Make me feel good. Don't open your eyes, Mary. So this one caught my attention. Category idea from Michael Morrison. Would this movie be better if it was directed by Spielberg or Scorsese? Ooh, that's fun. Could that be follow Cruz and Hanks? That's good. I like that.

The only problem I had with it is, are there arguments? I feel like each one would be naturally easy to figure out. Well, I think that they've circled each other and enough projects over the course of their career. They've had slight overlap here and there. Schindler's was a big one, right? Wasn't that the big one that Scorsese was going to direct and Spielberg took over? Yeah. Right. But any crime, action-y thing will go to Scorsese, right? I don't know. I mean, you could make the argument that it would be fascinating to see Spielberg try something like that.

Well, let's test drive it with the last couple we've done. Home Alone 2. Den of Thieves. Spielberg or Scorsese? I mean. Probably Scorsese. Scorsese. I need your kid Scorsese. Friday Night Lights. Spielberg or Scorsese? Spielberg. Yeah. Home Alone 2. Spielberg. The Gambler. Well, I don't know. Scorsese really has a feel for New York. The Gambler? Scorsese. Disclosure? Definitely not Spielberg. No. Running Scared. Scorsese. Yeah. Yeah.

The replacements? Both of them say no. What about Meet the Parents? Probably, I could see that being Scorsese just because he's worked with De Niro so much. Body double? Spielberg. Oh, interesting. Yeah, because he's a big Hitchcock guy too. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, I think Spielberg. Last one, Halloween 4.

What do you think? Probably Scorsese. That was the last one. That was the last one. I forgot about Sweet Halloween 4. That was great. That was awesome. Yeah. Category ideas from Johnny L. The Bill Simmons Hardcore Award for most inappropriate Google search on a work computer inspired by the film. Really doesn't happen that often, but it's... I like having a word. Sometimes it happens during the pod and it'll be like, don't Google that. Don't Google that. Yeah.

The innocent bystander award for the background character whose life is forever changed due to the actions of the movie. But of course, it's never acknowledged in the film. He says, the girl on the Girl Scouts team in Dodgeball who tests positive for PDs gets her team disqualified. Beaver tranquilizer? What happens to her down the road? That's pretty funny. And,

And then last idea, the memorabilia from this movie you'd want the least. Yeah, that's really good. I think maybe we add that. It's like memorabilia you'd want the most or the least and you get either choice, right? Yeah. Like Demi Moore's substance body at the end of the film. Right, yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. Question from Steven M. Why would you guys do a rewatch on Rocky III and Rocky IV before the Oscar-winning Rocky I? It makes no sense. Yeah.

Bill would you like to take that one? I don't know. I don't know what Craig's doing. I don't know what he's doing over there. We did Rocky 4. We did the first. I don't think I've done a Rocky with you. Yeah. I've been saving you for Rocky 1. Thank you. I did Rocky 3 with Sal and Gus. My buddy Gus because we had watched Rocky 3 together so many times. And did you do 4 with Kyle? Rocky 4 was Kyle. I think that was during COVID. Yeah, maybe. It was Zoom era. It was a Zoom pod. It was.

And I just did it in the order of Rocky movies that I like. My favorite is three. Really? My second favorite is four. One's slow. Yeah. And features the controversial seduction scene. And then two. Which really, Rocky should have gone to jail for 10 years. That's really rough to watch. No intimacy coordinator on that one either. Yeah, Rocky made some mistakes. But Rocky one, we probably do one. And then maybe we do Rocky two, but it's just the last 25 minutes.

From her waking up from the coma. It's a mini rewatchables. First hour and a half of that movie. Shoot that in the sun. Oh, movie suggestion from Elijah. Big fan of the rewatchables. You've already done Alien. I'd love to hear you guys discuss Aliens. Me too, Elijah. It's one of the best sci-fi action films ever. One of the better sequels. It's immensely rewatchable. I just rewatched Alien last week. I have never seen Aliens.

CR, any thoughts on Aliens? I like that movie. Oh, you do? Yeah. Had no idea. Are you out on Aliens? No, I really like it. We've been saving it. It's a classic. And just the new conversation alone would just be incredible. I saw Aliens on a date. Did you? Yeah. It's a long movie for a date. Nothing happened after. Not the future sports gal. Nothing.

A complete from Scott Murphy. I really hate that these pods are so long, but damn it, there should be a fact-checking category, particularly with Bill quoting other movies. For years, he's been saying cross the beams instead of cross the streams. Ghostbuster. But he managed to equal that during the longest yard pod. When the Anacod Steel is brought up and he goes to quote Wall Street, he says, blue oyster loves Anacod Steel.

No, no, no. It's Blue Horseshoe. Blue Oyster is the bar in the Police Academy series. I know he's old and his braid is becoming mush, but damn. Either get it right or stop quoting other films. I disagree. That gives the show its flavor. It's so fun. Yeah. You need that. It's also like, it's always that, this pregnant pause where it's like, should we correct him? We all look at each other. It's hard to host. I agree with you. I know. Yeah.

Plus the vaccine. Yeah. Right. Pre-vaccine. The polio vaccine? Is that what you're talking about? Pre-vaccine. Half the time you guys bring up a character's name from a movie, I have no idea what you're talking about. I don't mind having... I can't believe how good you are remembering characters' names. I'm...

I'm fine with fucking up occasionally. I fucked up in the Meet the Parents with Owen Wilson, Luke Wilson for like five solid minutes. Yeah. And you wanted to be corrected earlier on that one? No, Kyle eventually. During a break, I told you. Yeah. An ad break. And Kyle was nice enough not to correct me. Do you then say, I can't believe I've been saying that wrong or do you just push through? Yeah, I acknowledge that. You acknowledge that. But would you rather somebody correct you? Which Wilson was it? Was it Luke or Owen? Owen was in the movie. You were saying Luke.

Yeah, see, I still can't get it right. But Luke's in your head because there's a category named after him. Would you rather somebody correct you after the first mistake or kind of let it sit and tell you? No, I think it's funnier if I don't know. Okay. You're doing it for the game. New category idea for Jacob Murphy. Every now and then you guys talk about some great names in the rewatchables movies like Mitch McDeer, Kelly Leak.

These names should be given the category of the Brock Landers and Chess Rockwell Award. Yeah, this is up there. The Whip Whitaker Award from Flight. Yeah. So you could talk me into this just being a standard category. Best name. Best name. Best character name. Yeah. Because we always talk about it anyway. Maybe it goes in what's aged the best. I don't know.

New category from Daniel C. The Carl from Walking Dead Award for what character would survive the longest in the zombie apocalypse. Classic rewatchables examples include Gem in the Town, Buck and Boogie Nights, and Tubbs in Calderon's Revenge. This cannot be a category, but I like the spirit. I like that he threw in Tubbs. Yeah, he was really speaking our language.

New category from Zach Smith, suggesting the Barney Cousins Award for most inexplicable accent work. Recent winners, Carrie Elwes and Twister, Lindsey Krauss and Slapshot, Dennis Christopher and Breaking Away, any bad Boston accent. What's wrong with Lindsey Krauss and Slapshot? I don't know. He's drive-by. But then he says, Barney could also be a great addition to the Wayne Jenkins category.

I'm not against that one. Hello, Chris. So we're going to add in a character on a movie that's not available to stream at all? Hello, Chris. Drink the coffee, Chris. New category idea from Michael Connor. I would love to see a new category called, what is the perfect age to see this movie? Love this. Great one. Seeing The Breakfast Club at 15 is so much better than seeing it at 10 or 25. What's the perfect age to see Goodfellas? One minute from now.

Has Ben seen Goodfellas? Goodfellas is the best. I have to imagine for most movies that are great, it's like 16 to 22, right? I think it's end of high school, beginning of college. Yeah.

I think there's plenty of films that are better than early high school. It'd be weird if it was like 48. Right. But the movies from that like 95 to 97 era, 99 era are the ones that I still think about the most probably because of what age I was. I mean, if there's movies about parenthood, maybe you want to be a parent first. But most movies, for Superbad, you're never going to say 38 years old is the best time to say Superbad. I think one thing I've noticed is the movies that are serious but then have –

are secretly funny are the ones that have aged the best for me like Heat and Goodfellas that are great movies I loved anyway but Goodfellas is so fucking funny now when I watch it like he just I was texting you over the break about Tommy

When he shoots Spider and then he gets mad at Spider. Get up! What the fuck, Spider? That actually, I mean, we did Silence of the Lambs live. Yeah. It was mostly as if Silence of the Lambs was a comedy. So in some ways, I think the movies sometimes age where it's actually better like the 35th time you've seen it than the first time, you know?

Because I feel that way about... I definitely feel that way about Goodfellas. I enjoy it as much now as I ever did. But I would say sometimes movies hit... We talked about this in the past with like... When we did like Kicking and Screaming. Like you have to see a movie like that. That's about those characters right around the time that you have to be the same age. Yeah. My son really loves those...

kid in the it's a summer and the kid who's got the job for the summer and all these people yeah snack shack yeah yeah he loves those movies he's always like dad where are more movies like that i agree the summer movies movie suggestion from used car cowboy this is just a weird email i'm gonna read it the 1978 invasion of the body snatchers would be awesome he wants us to do it a plus movie plus it has jeff goldblum playing a character called belichick

who ends up completely stoic, emotionless, and it features the 1978-79 Golden State Warriors. I'd like to imagine Brooke Adams' boyfriend was watching Jerry Maxwell and Alvin Martin from Inside Moves taking that team in the playoffs. Also puts me in mind of finding out how many people in my life were pro MAGA. I think you used Car Cowboy just did the whole pod for us. Steven and Charlotte from Massachusetts wrote this one together. Hey, everyone. Love the show. My dad and I are big listeners. Had an idea for a new category.

The Kathy Griffin in Pulp Fiction, Mike Myers in Inglourious Bastards, Lena Dunham in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood Award for most jarring casting decision. Yeah. Thanks for such a great show. Hope you're all staying safe. It's kind of like the casting choice that took you out of the movie, which for me was, and we talked about this, my friends over the last few days, Stanley Tucci in Conclave. I'm like,

Yeah, Stanley Tucci. Yeah, you're like, I've been watching you make pasta in your home on YouTube for the last three years. But Ralph Fiennes didn't bother you. No, no. Right. This is an interesting category. I'm trying to think of a recent movie that we've done. This casting took me out of the movie for two minutes. You can overcast a movie. Like, not everybody needs to be someone. Lena Dunham in Once Upon a Time, you're like, okay, it's Lena Dunham.

Sometimes it's not the movie's fault. Sometimes you'll be watching Running Scared and you're like, oh my God, that's Jimmy Smits. That's a pretty... This is more like the side... I think Lena Dunham in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood is a great example of this. Maybe that was a little bit too much mustard. Yes, it feels like stunt casting to a degree. The reverse is Tom Noonan in Heat. Yeah. It's all out there. It's a good one though. A Rocky IV nitpick from Paul.

On the 39th anniversary of the end of the Cold War, I have one nitpick regarding the greatest movie ever made. Pauly says, what about the Rose Bowl game? But the fight takes place on Christmas Day, one week before the Rose Bowl. I don't know what to do with this information. I'm just passing along because it obviously has been bothering Paul for a long time.

And then Danielle pointed out with the Hereditary episode, we mentioned it was piano wire. Yeah, that's what I thought. It was a rope saw. They're used to cut down trees. And the only reason I'm really mentioning this detail is to emphasize the details Ari Aster puts in his films. So it was not a piano wire. It was a rope saw? Yeah. I was unaware of that. Rope saw would make more sense due to the area the family lives in. Oh, yeah. Utah. Likely used to make the treehouse.

Dave Van Buskirk wants us to do The Sure Thing, which has been on the list forever, but it's another movie that's just not available. Also a big one. I'm a One Crazy Summer fan and a Better Off Dead fan. So Sure Thing, just not around. A slew of categories from Brian Greer. The Jenny Gump Award for the character who seems nice, but is actually a terrible person. I really like this one. Maybe it's a conditional one. The Pam Beasley. Yeah. Mike Wallace in The Insider. Would this movie have been better if someone died?

Yeah. Not against it. The Ice Storm Award. Would this movie have been better if some of the characters randomly had an affair or fucked? A little dark. And then he has monthly themes. Vengeance is mine month about characters seeking vengeance, but then dog month. Best in show, Marley and me, Turner and Hooch.

You know, I've circled Dog Month for a while. I can't find the fourth movie. So those are the three? Those three would definitely be in Dog Month. I don't know what the fourth one is. And it seems like you would want to present like a positive. Well, the Simmons family loves dog movies. Marley and me is so sad. Man. Dog's Purpose. Really good.

Oh, okay. The sled dog movie that, what's his face made? Cuba Gooding? Paul Walker. Eight Below? Yeah. Awesome. What about that Channing Tatum dog movie recently? Oh, the... Dog. Dog. Hasn't gotten there yet. Homeward Bound, big one for me as a kid. Carl Rice writes in, for categories, I like the idea of the heat. Okay, motherfucker! Award for the moment the movie steps up a notch.

Yeah. Yeah. Not bad. I like that. That's like Denzel Washington giving Ethan Hawke angel dust. He's like, oh, you like to get wet. Didn't know that. Last one from Jackson in Toronto. He loves the show, listens every week. He's been thinking about Full Metal Jacket for 30 years. Sergeant Hartman has a smart-ass response for every answer the privates give. In one scene, he asked Joker, do you believe in the Virgin Mary? And Joker says no. The response gets a slap in the face, but also Joker gets promoted.

Whole pivotal scene built around the response. What would have happened if Joker said yes? Would the response be outstanding? There's no way the sergeant could have given a disgust or response for answering. Yes. I think there should be a category for what would have happened if they just did or said blank. Hmm.

Yeah, so this is a little bit of a cousin of the online idea of diehard, what if he just leaves in the first five minutes? You know what I mean? There's ways in which movies could be over in 15 minutes. There's a horror film, like what if they just moved out of the house? But if there's a pivotal line that if this person had said X... What if he had said this? Yeah, there's something there. We got some good ones out of that, though. In Glorious Bastards, if he does the correct three, do we easily win World War II? I can't believe I screwed up...

I can't believe I screwed up and sent you the wrong doc. That's okay. I sent you, I meant to send you a doc. Did you feel like it affected my performance? No, I only had wanted you to prepare for seven things. Instead I sent you a doc with seven emails. You jumped around. That's fine. We'll use a couple of those. I mean, the most important thing is that Daniel Plainville and Plainview. Yeah. Daniel Plainview.

How'd you correct me? I don't know. Daniel Plainville is starting small forward for Indiana. And Wilford Brimley, what's his character? Davis Shaw. What's his kid's name in There Will Be Blood? H.W.? Yeah. Yeah. I saw H.W. What did we say we could do? Like a Wednesday rewatchable?

That was the Luke Wilson mailbag. So basically people would write in with their Luke Wilson hottest takes. I don't mind having people send hottest takes and doing a special little mini episode and seeing if it works. Craig Horlbeck, Chris Ryan. We'll be back next week with an actual movie. So thanks for your patience. But the rewatchables will be kicking back in every week after this episode. Thanks to everybody who sent in

Really fun, great email questions. We didn't get to nearly all of them, but thanks for that. If you ever want to email us, therewatchables33 at gmail.com. Good to see you guys.