Megalopolis LIVE!
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Good thing we have a lot of it. And by it, I mean time. We saw Megalopolis, so you know what that means. And it's the Street Body.

Hello people of New York! We are live at the New York Comedy Festival back at Town Hall.

Talking about a fable of our time. That's right, Megalopolis, a film that has been in production since 1991, but then actual production in 2023. Now, here is the thing. I normally spend this time at the top of the show trying to break down the plot, just in case you didn't see it. Oh, it's about a kid who gets a crazy pair of glasses and he learns how to fly. I can't break down this movie! No!

An alternate New York, an architect, a mayor, a Fox News host, I don't know. It seems like so much happens, but yet so little, but yet so long. And yet I couldn't turn my eyes away. The film came out just a couple of weeks ago.

I pre-ordered it. I bought it only to find out it was only available for rental. So I paid $27.99 and then $19.99. I fucked on this movie. I did it all for you because this is a movie for New York. This is your movie. And let's break it down with my two co-hosts. Please welcome to the stage, Mr. Jason Manzoukas. Time! Stop! What's up, jerks?

Let's go! We have to be out by 1130. Fuck it, we're locking the doors! We're staying till dawn! Everybody gets Megalon! Seriously, what is Megalon?

Apparently, it can stop or repair bullet wounds and build buildings. This... Wow. Wow. So you paid twice for it. Yeah. So we both had very, very complicated relationships to this movie because I accidentally, a two and a half hour movie, I accidentally watched 25 minutes twice. What? What?

Because I didn't recognize them as things I'd already seen before. The movie repeats itself so much that I was like, huh, I feel like they did this already. And then they got to a point where I was like, oh, fuck!

I might have talked about this in another episode, but when I saw Requiem for a Dream, the projectionist messed up and played the second reel twice. And I was like, ooh, this is an interesting choice. And then... Non-linear storytelling. I've already seen it, but now I'm watching again. Now I'm learning more. And then he came out and was like, I'm sorry, I fell asleep. And then...

It really fucked me up. I never want to watch that movie again. But the benefit of this movie is no matter how many times you watch it, it won't make sense. It is cryptic at best. It is a series of dreamscapes. Ladies and gentlemen, June, Diane, Rachel. No, because...

We only have till 1130. I knew we were getting too close. We only have till 1130, so I had to come out. I knew we were getting too close. It's so late. So late already. We can't start a show now. We got the coveted 945 slot. I'm 51 years old. I can't do a show at this hour. You know, Paul, did you say you bought the movie twice? Yes. Okay. And I bought it once.

So we have spent 24, 19, and 19. So we have spent over $60 on Megalopolis. Francis Ford Coppola, thank you. Wow. You've gone a long way to making him whole from this. Him personally whole. So I had an interesting experience on the plane because I was sitting...

Sitting next to our 10-year-old son, not the one that was out here, but our 10-year-old and I was, I, well, first of all, I had to cover a lot of the movie with my book and try to hide it from him, but I fell asleep. And I fell asleep for a while, and he woke me up, and I screamed at him. I was like, what are you doing? I was sleeping. And he's like, I thought you were supposed to watch the movie. I go, I am. I am.

Did we ever do that? I would love it if you opened your notebook and he had taken notes for the section that you'd fallen asleep. He just took expert notes on the movie. By the way, our son has said that when we die, he's taking over the show. He did say that. He did say that. Wait, does that include me? No, you get to stay. Oh, I get to stay? Fuck yeah, I'll do a show with two kids. Any babies in the house?

I told, I don't know if I told you this. You brought a baby? What? You wish? Not cool. Don't say you wish you brought a baby. No circumstance is that good.

I wish I brought my baby. Sure. A baby. I wish. I wish I had a baby to bring to a 945 comedy show. Let's play clip 10 because we can look at it. Oh, we're going to watch clips? Well, all I'm going to say is this. Megalopolis was meant to be seen on IMAX. So imagine this scene with the boner in IMAX. We came to pay our respects, Grandpa. What do you think of this boner I got?

Look at how small that is. Move! That bow is not going to produce that many pounds of pork. And move! Move!

This man. Okay, old man Legolas. That is, wow. I mean, watching it again, he seems like if you put a gun in his hand, I wouldn't be as afraid. The bow and arrow makes him seem dangerous and crazy. Yes. Also, I love that he's just closing one eye. For the first half, he's just like, I don't know. And then he's like, ha ha! Cling, cling. Like he's like suddenly Robin Hood.

He's been preparing for this for so long. Oh, do you mean welcome? Do you think that the arrows were made out of Megalon? Oh, that's interesting. I don't think so, because I think only Adam Driver has access to Megalon, which I don't know. From outer space. I believe it is from outer space. Okay, so here's what I thought, and I could be wrong, because I was, again, in and out of my own fever dream, and then tapping into this one, but...

that when he went to go rescue his wife, Sunny Hope, from the water... And was that going to be the daughter's name if they had a daughter? And if it was a boy, it was Francis? Francis! They said if it was a boy, it would be Francis. And I was like, movie, get fucked! Yeah!

I'm not interested in what this is about now. I mean, these names, Caesar Catalina, you have Franklin Cicero. And no Catalina wine mixer jokes to be found. Wow Platinum. Incredible. Claudio Pulcher, Crassus, Fundy, and Sunny Hope.

Well, so I thought when Sunny Hope... Oh, no, Sunny Hope is the virgin, I think. Oh, no. No, you're right. Sorry. That's someone else. Vestra, I think. Vestra, right, yes. Vestra, a vestal virgin? Yes. Oh, my God. Like in the Procol Harem song? The virgin auction. Vesta Sweetwater is her name. What? Vesta Sweetwater is her name. Oh, yes, Vesta Sweetwater. Oh, stop saying all these names. Yes.

They're so terrible. Both Paul and I, I thought Adam Driver did a wonderful job. Me too. I really did because I was like, I was watching his performance and I'm like, well, first of all, that hair was so tough and I don't know what any of us could have done with it. Like it truly was so difficult. And I know the cut. I know it's the Caesar cut, but there were times. Oh, is that what it was?

I think so. Yes, didn't you? I mean, wasn't it giving you full-blown George Clooney from season two of ER? What it made me feel was like, can you comb your hair? It felt like his hair was never... And that's what was upsetting. It's not a cut that any person can pull off. Not even Caesar? Yeah, not even Caesar. How about Little Caesar? Pizza, pizza.

But on him, it also looked like, yeah, can you put a comb through it? Can you fix it a little bit at all? Like spread some Megalon in it. See what's up. See what happens. Give it a sheen. Give it a gloss. I really thought that he did a great... First of all, his soliloquy, I thought his Shakespeare was the best part of the movie. And I wanted more of it. Well, yeah, because that was something that was not written...

For the film. But boy, Adam Driver can handle the text. I thought he did a beautiful job. I think Adam Driver was like, can I improvise? Because apparently, spoiler alert, they improvised a lot of this movie. Wait, no. This wasn't tightly scripted.

I want to say this is what is on record. Coppola adopted an experimental style encouraging his actors to improvise and write certain scenes during the shoot and added them at the last minute into the script. The art department and visual effects team, among others, left midway through the production. Um...

It's fair to say it is well documented this movie was flying by the seat of its pants, which is odd for a film that he's been writing since 1991. That's the thing. That is what's so tough. You think there would be some sort of dot, dot, dot plot? Story? It's a movie of ideas. It's like, is it? To me, this movie is...

A guy who has listened to a podcast about Roman history and is really high and going, what would be great is this. And then you have a guy, he's like Caesar and he's like, but it's the city, but it's also the Statue of Liberty, the torches in the other hand. And then they're all running around and then there's about homeless people and it's about New York and it's about life and fucking. And you're like, right, right. But you would never make that movie. You just go home and go to bed.

And he made it. But instead, you sell a substantial amount of money, of your own personal money in your wine company at value to finance this insane movie. Well, there were times, and I know it's a movie about ideas, okay? But there were times where I was just like...

This utopia that he's describing, like the only real difference is that instead of the buildings being like straight blocks, they're swirls.

It's like living in Adam's Drivers. It's like that Hudson Yard thing over there. Yeah, it's like six worlds. I looked at it and I was like, oh, wait, is that what it is? To me, it seems like the future is that we would all be living in a version of a pinball machine. Like, it's like, ooh, it all looked like people were traveling in pinballs and they would go around in pinballs. Yeah. And at the same time, I didn't understand what the...

I want to build a casino. I want to build a pinball machine. And it seems like those ideas could probably exist together. So much of it is about, is analogous to the Roman Empire and all this stuff. And I'm just not one of those people who's obsessed with the Roman Empire. So I was like, I don't give a fuck.

about any of this stuff. And it seems to be just consumed with legacy and time. And the artist, the artist needs to be able to control time. And I was like, buddy, that's not going to happen. We are all hurtling towards certain death. And...

I didn't understand. I mean, at points in the movie, I was like, the female characters are so underwritten. I'm so upset. But then also I was upset by the male characters too. So it was really tough. I mean, the movie does not pass the Bechdel test on any level, but also like... It doesn't pass the movie test. It doesn't. It doesn't. Like, what is... It's in a movie. I don't know. Who is Jason Schwartzman in this movie?

Great question. Who is that character? Who's Dustin Hoffman? Who's Dustin Hoffman? What's the story of the dead wife? Don't know. And when he goes to that apartment and he's with his dead wife sitting over her and Natalie Emanuel has followed him there and she's spying on him and it turns out he's talking to an empty bed. I was like, what is this? Not only is he... Is he going to fuck the empty bed MacGruber style? Not only is he fucking... Not only is he like talking to her...

He's not talking to an empty bed. He is, he is, um, he's tying her hair. Like he's, he's French braiding her hair. Doesn't he imagine there to be other people in the room as well? Yes. And I think that, I think that the other actress, uh,

the mayor's daughter can see his visions, right? Their baby won't stop. He can stop time. She can see his visions because she sees him go to a flower shop that I don't think is real, get flowers to go visit his wife, which is also not real, but is he actually going to an abandoned building?

Or is he just in a mine palace? And why wouldn't he just do that in his own house? But then he also has a flock of kids working for him. Okay, I want to talk about the design department. What are they called?

The Design Architects Department. Yes, the building authority. The Design Association, whoever they are. The DA. The DA. We call it the DA. When they are in his main work loft. One of my favorites. Oh, my God. And they are doing physical. The montage. There's multiple scenes in this movie. Oh, my God.

There's multiple scenes in this movie that I am certain employed the palabolas dancers. There's no doubt in my mind. The fetus, where the fetus turns into dancers. I was like, fucking palabolas dancers.

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On January 24th, Academy Award winner Michelle Yeoh takes command. Gather your people. We're going to need every one of them. In Section 31, a new Star Trek original movie on Paramount+. Section 31 is just a place for people to bend the rules. Starfleet is here to make sure no one commits murder. What a cute idea.

This is chaos. Let's get messy. Don't miss the worldwide premiere of Star Trek Section 31, streaming January 24th, exclusively on Paramount+.

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I was like, I'm in. I don't know why I'm so in. Like, I'm having this, I'm really wrestling with what am I watching? I don't get it. I don't like it. But I'm also like, I can't look away and I need to see it again. Do we need to buy it again? We've already bought it so many times. I think Francis Ford Coppola will come over to our house and do a director's commentary if asked.

Now, here's the thing. I'm sorry I have to go back to the shape people again because I just want to know what we end up seeing in the actual space, in his realized vision.

Again, are those swirls the shapes that they had been creating? I believe his architecture studio, which is in the dome of the Chrysler building, or whatever that's called. It's not the Chrysler building, whatever. Maybe it's called the Heisler building. Yes, of course. Do you guys, because this is New York, did you guys feel like this movie got your city right?

Did you feel seen by this movie, New York City? A movie shot in New York and filmed in Atlanta. That's right, New Rome. But here's the thing. When you see, I mean, yes, we see kids. We see upside down water bottles and tennis balls representing a city. But then when he brings somebody out to like the... The trash. The model of the city that looks like it's just piled up from the trash. Walk around. Close your eyes.

Why? You're an architect. If you look at an architect build a model, it's not built with trash from the garbage outside. It's not like we found a tennis ball and put it on a parking cone. Especially because he is using real architectural tools. I mean, he is standing with, I don't know. T-square? Yeah, T-square. Is it called a T-square? What's it called? I did want to see him get crucified on that. T-square? Wait, is there an architect in the house? Raise your hand.

I'm not interested in a balcony architect. Yeah, okay. I'm interested in an architect that got their act together enough to get floor seats. All right. What is it? It's a T-square. It is a T-square. All right, well, thank you. All that for we already knew it. Then I appreciate nothing wrong that you did. All right, so it is a T-square.

Here's what I'll say. When he goes to the expo to show off his main invention, it's just a motorized walkway. He's like, this will take you wherever you want to go. It's like, yeah, I just did that at the airport.

This felt a lot like, do you remember when the Segway came out, when they were calling it the It, and it was going to revolutionize commuting and travel in America, and they wouldn't announce what it was, and everybody was like, what's his name, Dean Kamen, was that the guy's name that invented it? He's got this thing, it's about to change the world, we're about to change history, cities are going to look different, global warming is going to get changed by this, and it's this fucking scooter with gyroscopes. And everybody was like, no, guy, no! No!

Well, that's the thing that was so funny about the walkway. I mean, that's what it is. It's a walkway. We never saw people transport on it. We only ever saw them walk on it. Like, wow. Right. But then they get in those balls at the end. Oh, I guess they do get in the balls at the end. But it was also when he's showing his mom. I mean, we haven't talked about the relationship with the mom, but...

When he's showing her the walkway, it looks like it's 10 feet long. That's it. Where is she going to go? She's going to be kicked right off it. I feel like that's like Elon Musk building some length of a hyperloop or whatever that thing is called. Just to be like, see, I can do it. And this was him being like, this is what it'll look like. But it'll be all over and it'll go to these buildings that look sort of like plants.

And then that's it? Is it just a... What is it? What does he want to do? I think it's a vibe, ultimately. It's a vibe. It's a vibe. Megalopolis is a vibe. I buy that. Honestly, I do think, though, that it is a lifestyle more than anything else. Yeah. It's the kind of lifestyle in a city where the news reports they're the richest kids in the world and rumor has it they're sleeping with each other, too. Why did that keep coming up?

It is, I mean, according to my research, Caesar proposes using Megalon to build Megalopolis, a utopian urbanist community.

And Cicero wants a casino that will provide an immediate tax revenue. Wait a minute. That's the first I'm hearing about a casino. You did hear about it. Oh, casino is in that opening scene when they're on the rafters and they go, we want to build this casino. And Dustin Hoffman's like, it's a good casino. And that's when he comes in and does to be or not to be. Yes. But the problem

The problem is, and maybe it's there and I missed it, but I guess we all know that's why casinos come into town for the tech stuff. But that was not made explicitly clear in the movie. So I was sort of like, why is he want a casino so bad? And also, why would they need to get on scaffolding above a model of the city to show what a casino would look like? I don't know because they're all looking down. This is the way to look at it.

The difference, there are two competing interests. One is a single casino and one is an entire city. That's two very different things. And I did want, I did want Adam Driver's character, Catalina, Catalina. Caesar Catalina. Okay, okay, Caesar. I did want C squared to address... By the way, I will say, Caesar Catalina is my favorite salad dressing. Okay.

I did want him to address, like, the infrastructure issue of Megalopolis and also, like, what is going to happen to all the people who are being displaced? Oh, they're upset. Does he have an answer for that? Because this motherfucker is, like, independently imploding buildings with no authority. He's just, blow it. No, I think... And also...

And they're so close. Like, there's no protective gear. There's not a safety goggle in sight. Well, that's what I thought the Megalon was, like, protecting. But then the Megalon doesn't really come. But I think that this movie at points is... Also, why is his wife somehow inside of the Megalon?

Like, whenever he's, like, interacting with the Megalon in its fractal glory, her face is looking through it and she's talking to him. See, I thought he found the Megalon when he went into the ocean after her. Yes, that's what he did. I think that's what the movie wants us to think. Okay. I don't think we ever saw that. I thought you said he found it in space.

I think it is from space. It's from space, but it's in the water. Okay. I mean, unless... I'm so sorry. I know we have some architects here. Is there a Megalon expert here? I will... So a...

Okay, so a Soviet satellite crashed to Earth, destroying most of New Rome, and then Caesar builds Megalopolis out of the ruins using his family forces to fund the project. Okay, so then why blow up part of the city if in the middle of the movie, the satellite is going to destroy part of the city? Like, what's the...

Like, why not just have the satellite land and be like, uh-oh, by the way, I don't need all the 9-11-esque footage that is the result. I was like, oh, come on, man. Here's what I will say about this movie. I feel like sometimes you get a director of a certain age who is like, I need to make a movie to justify that I've been an asshole my entire life.

But I'll put it in a fable, right? It's like, you see, it doesn't have to always make sense. Just ideas, right? Like, let me be. Let me cook. And also fuck some people that's not my wife. Now...

I think at parts, this movie thinks it's so smart and treats us like we're so dumb. It's like when they're driving through the bad part of town and the Justice statue is crumbling down. I like that part. Leaning up against the wall. She's so tired, Justice. I like that part.

There's just so much injustice in this world. But you see, now look, that's a visual, beautiful thing, sure. But then you cut to the car and he's like, justice has fallen down. It's like, well, no, we just saw it. It's not a fucking radio play. Here's the thing that I'll say, because I want to agree with you both. Adam Driver, I think, he's in all of this movie. He's in every frame. He's doing all of the work, trying very...

valiantly to make sense of a movie that is frankly batshit crazy. The thing about watching Plaza or Shire or whatever is they get to just spiral off and be nuts. But Driver's got to hold the whole thing together and he's doing, I will say, a Nicolas Cage level performance. I thought it was great. One of the only Coppolas not in this movie, inexplicably.

Talia Shire's in the house. Schwarzman's in the house. James Caan was supposed to be in this movie. It was going to be his swan song. He was like, Francis, you've got to write me a swan song. And the part that was written for him was the part of Dustin Hoffman. But James Caan passed away before they shot it. Now here's the thing. And what part was that exactly? Well, this is... He dies off camera. He dies off camera. And then when they flash to it in a horrific way...

But why even have it at all? He also has a statue in the yard or whatever. And at a certain point, aren't they, they're unveiling, is it the statue of John Voight? And it keeps wobbling back and forth because it's clearly just made out of plastic. And the giant bronze statue, they're trying to take the curtain off of it. It's just like wobble, wobble, wobble. And I was like, you couldn't get a take where the statue doesn't wobble?

It's really tough because you have some incredible actors playing like handmaidens to other men. Like there's the there's Dustin Hoffman, who I guess is John Boyd's second in command. Yeah. There's Jason Schwartzman. There's Lawrence Fishburne, who's like putting chairs in front of, you know, Adam Driver. And I'm like, why the fuck are these guys playing these roles?

That's why I really appreciated Adam Driver is because he was fully doing whatever it is that he was doing. And he really was. And I was like, wow, hats off. I believe that man deserves an Oscar for this film. I would give him to do what he did. I wish we could write in. I wish we could write in for Oscars. By the way, it still could get nominated. It's in contention. This is Oscar season. People are jockeying for it. I will say this.

I don't disagree that he's in a Nicolas Cage-esque film, but I do think he's grounding it in a way, when he's doing that speech, he's like, what are those things? They're little hot dogs and pastries. Incredible. Pigs in a blanket, yes, that's what they are. I was like, wow. But he's not like, he's not scene-chewing. And God damn it, I'm interested in what he's saying. Do I understand it? No.

In the scene where he's doing all of his architecture that we just were doing that montage, he turns to somebody at one point, laid into it and goes, what if what connects power stores it? I was like, yeah, man. What? Are you only now getting to that? You've got Megalon.

This is why I think the movie is so smart and so dumb. It's like, oh, yeah. Power should be stored and controlled. But then they also have this theme. Like, my favorite line of the whole movie is...

someone is being interviewed by a high school newspaper and it's called Dingbat News. Incredible. Dingbat News. Hey, I'm from Dingbat News. And then it was like, I guess a commentary on how like sensational entertainment reporters are. I don't know. I don't know. I was confounded by that scene and I think I'll think about it for the rest of my life because...

It did not feel like the teenage reporter was an actor. And I say that as a compliment. Thank you. It's his granddaughter. Thank you, audience. I knew it was. And I didn't, but I did. I knew there was a texture to how she was. I was like, this is not someone who's an actor. But then there was also another little girl next to her. Now, that little girl, I was like, there's no way she goes to the same school.

and like reads that newspaper, she's way too young. Who is that? And she doesn't have any lines. I don't think she speaks. Is that just another granddaughter? That's my guess. Wow. Why not? This felt like a grandpa giving everybody candy. Everybody gets candy and guess what? You can do whatever you want all day.

But no, there are no rules. Here's what it will be. It's not candy. It's old nuts. Like old, like they've been out for a while. Like they're in a jar. Like, why? These are the nuts, the company's nuts. And it's a lot of them are just like left like those big walnuts. And they're like, yeah, it is technically food. But I'm like, I don't want it. Have a nut, have a nut. And then you have to like take one of those big like almonds. All right, I guess that's what this movie feels like.

Everything okay, buddy? Just think about those damn nuts. I feel like you got to say your favorite line. I'm going to say my favorite line right now, which was, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

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ABC Wednesdays. Tim Allen and Kat Dennings star in the new family comedy, Shifting Gears. Dad, I'm broke and I need a place to stay until I figure out what the rest of my life looks like. So, a couple of days. When his daughter moves back in. The last time you walked out that door, you looked back at me and gave me a double bird. I was 18. The double bird was how I ended up.

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We talk about the fact that we take notes. You're not seeing us if you're listening. We're looking at our notes. Never have I taken so many notes that I'm looking back on and finding confusing as to what they might refer to. I didn't write jokes. I don't know. I just wrote things like Noxzema face. And I wrote Noxzema face because... I wrote Megalon face. Okay, so Noxzema... After his injury, I was like, I think he's had some Megalon done. See...

I like that megalom face. I was talking about Cicero's wife, the mayor's wife. When he gets that phone call in the middle of the night, it looks like his wife just has Noxzema all over her face. And I was like, I always heard that Noxzema, you wash your face with Noxzema. I don't think you leave it on as a base coat. I mean, I think it was a mask, but believe me, I had questions. I was like, how could you ever go to sleep with that thick of a mask on? So why does he Bruce Wayne it?

That's so weird. I also read, I believe this movie would function better as a Batman-esque origin story. Yeah. Driver feels like at a certain point he has no choice but to become a vigilante. And when he gets shot in the eye, I'm like, here we go. Perfect setup. Let everybody believe you're dead. Come back as some sort of Megalon guy. I don't know what it does, but be a Batman. Well, he does have powers. Here's the question I have about powers. And Julia...

Why does she have powers? Why? I think what we're trying to get here is a little bit of like a Romeo and Juliet thing. It's like, here are two sides. Hatfield and McCoy. It's like, he's got the power to stop time. From Romeo and Juliet. The Hatfields and the McCoys. Of course. Classics.

Romeo, oh Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo? But I think the idea is that the only thing that can bring both houses together is both houses have a special thing. So she has the ability to see what he sees in his head. He has the ability to stop time and their baby...

I think their baby is trapped in that moment. Well, that's what I wrote. And it's going to absolutely die. I wrote that too. The baby doesn't have the ability to say restart time. That baby's still crawling around right now trying to figure out how to survive. I thought that if that baby took off on the carpet like at the end of Aladdin, like, it's a whole new world. But I would have loved it if it was a flying carpet. It looked like a little flying carpet. Wait, but here's what, I guess this is the only problem I had with the movie.

movie. Yes. Yes, it's a movie about these big ideas, but I felt like the fact that he had... Well, I don't know. But I felt like the fact that he had superpowers was undermining whatever this movie was trying to tell us. Well, it's trying to... Well, I think the theme there is this line, which Julia says to Caesar, Catalina...

Artists can never lose their control over time. I wrote that down too. I have an update. They can. Yeah. There's something about like... The movie wants to be about how art or the artist can stop and engage with... Art is... I think the idea is you need to let me cook. Right? And then... And we'll figure it out later. And that's... If you look at Francis Ford Coppola, that's his career in a nutshell. But I guess...

I don't know why I'm debating this. His career is like, don't trust me, I'll make Apocalypse now. And then he's like, don't trust me, I make Dracula. Don't trust me, and then it gets worse and worse. Everyone gets a little... But what does he do with the time he's frozen? Because that's also what I didn't understand. Once he's frozen...

Once he's freezing time, he's just... Why does he walk off the Chrysler building and say, stop time? And then he's like... Because I think that that's him learning the power. I think that's the first time he's doing it. Really? Why would he say it? Because I... You laugh! Don't laugh at me! That's a real question. Wait, are you saying... So I thought stop time was him forcing time to stop. Like, I didn't think the magic could happen without stop time. I agree.

But what I think, what I'm curious about is Paul is saying that's the first time that's occurred to him. So like that would mean as you are falling off of the top of a skyscraper, you think to say, stop. Oh, no, no. Maybe, maybe, you know. Oh, shit. It worked. No, you see. I see what you're saying. Fuck, I wish I'd saved my wife.

I think what happened was this. I wish I'd known this. I would have stopped Tom. But here's the thing. He couldn't have saved his wife because he can only stop time. He can't do anything with time.

with time or actions or wouldn't it be cool if he could like go and mess with stuff but he can't he only stops it but then and restarts it it's like that girl in that show small wonder small no small wonder is a robot this is the girl uh yeah it's a it out of this world boom she puts her fingers together um

What I think was this. Like, he was at, like, you know, he was at a pizza place, and they're like, what do you want? He's like, uh, uh, uh, stop time. Oh, shit. Everything stopped. He's like, huh. Next day, stop time. Oh, shit.

He's like, let me go on top of the Chrysler building now. And then I think he was testing it. So this is like his, we're seeing him like, oh, I got something. But that plays no part into the film. I was waiting for a stop time bullet. No, yeah. No, he got shot right in the face. He never, exactly. By a child killer.

Or I guess he is not a child killer, a killer child. So we do know, we know there are guns. Kids have them. It's not like everybody's got a tiny bow and arrow. I would have loved it if he's like, thanks for the autograph. Did he say der club? No, I didn't hear it. You have that? I, I, I, so everyone said it. So I wrote it down. I was like, I think I'm pretty sure he said der club. Do you think that's an improv or do you think Coppola was like, the line is der club?

It's scene four. You find me cruel, selfish, and unfeeling? I am. I work without caring what happens to either of us. So go back to the club. There it is. Fine. The head wag is everything. That is pretty great. The head wag says it all. Declare. Declare.

How was work today? Okay. I think. Now, I did something today. Here's what I want to talk to you about because I want to give it its due. When you saw this movie in the theater, there was a moment where someone was to walk in and do a line

in the theater, okay? They fix it in the video version. Someone just pops up, but it still is breaking the fourth wall in the sense that we're watching a linear movie, and then all of a sudden...

We're watching a movie screen and someone's standing up in front of the movie screen. Wait, play that. Okay, I will. I'm going to first play this. I was in an active blackout for much of watching. I have so little memory. So you would be watching the movie, right? I'd rather not be. And then this would happen.

I would just stand up and go, "Mr. Catalina, you said that as we jump into the future, we should do so unafraid. But what if when we do jump into the future, there is something to be afraid of?" And then he would answer me and I would leave the theater. - That's it? - Yes. - That's the whole bit? What's that meant to do? - I don't know!

But they couldn't figure out enough people to do it. So a lot of the times what would happen is Adam Driver would be sitting, staring at the audience in silence and then go, give his answer because no one had prompted him. So the audience had this uncomfortable moment of like, I feel weird now. But this is the scene. I'll play that scene too. But it was such an odd idea, but also weird.

but yet not interactive because it doesn't make any sense in the movie. I read somewhere when it premiered at Cannes, and I think that this is what happened at Cannes, that someone walked up and that moment happened, but someone said the movie is both doing way too much and too little. Yes. And it's such a confounding experience of like there's so much in here and there's nothing. It is the quintessence of neither nor. Yes. It is. It thinks...

It's a European art house tone poem, and then it's also interested in investigating time and art and architecture and all this science and all this stuff, and then it's also not interested in any of that? I said it felt like I was watching an acting class where two people, I can't even tell if they're talented because I don't know the text. The text is bad. But it's like, I guess they're doing the best job because I've seen people like, this is a scene from a play that you've never heard of. And I'm like, okay, yeah, I guess...

I can't fault them. It feels, you know what it feels like? It feels like, you know, there was that rash of movies of Shakespeare interpretations that were put into modern context. Or it was a, we're going to take Richard III, but we're going to put it in World War I. We're going to take this and blah, blah, blah. This feels like it's that, but they were like, we're going to take...

not Shakespeare. We're going to kind of put it in a bunch of Roman stuff, but it's also New York City, baby. And it's also about politics. Let's play that scene too, because I just want to go show you that scene too. This is the interactive moment of the film, which I wish maybe when we buy it, we'll have the option to have the line. By the way, Lawrence Fishburne does the voiceover

As voiceover and in real life too. And sometimes he does it and sometimes he doesn't. Sometimes text comes on screen and he reads every bit of it. Sometimes text comes on screen and it's just text on screen.

There's no rhyme or reason. I don't know if he's telling me this story or not. I don't know. I don't know if this story is from his own fever dream. Yeah. I watched Lawrence Fishburne in that scene, in the dear club scene, and I noticed that he walked off camera, and then he's only shown at the very end. I'm like, oh, this motherfucker got out of frame real quick. Although when he does come back in, I laughed so hard. There are moments in this fucking...

fucking thing that made me laugh. Oh yeah. He comes back on screen and there's some weird like space diorama hanging from the ceiling and he I think it's pronounced diarrhea.

Lawrence Fishburne comes back in and just sort of resets all of the little ornaments coming up. And I just thought, wow, to let actors out there like this. Hanging out there. Just trying to fucking stay alive in these seats. Trying to effortlessly deliver lines like, there are only two things impossible to stare at very long. The sun and your own soul.

Wait, I know I can stare at the sun quickly, but I can't look at my own soul at all. Never mind stare at it. I just want to hit this one more time. Did Lawrence Fishburne marry him and Sonny Hope in the back of a car? Okay.

So this is what I wanted to say. I would say one of my top two performances in the movie is by the Citroën car that they drive. Oh, I love that. It has more character than most of the people in the movie. I thought the way that it redecorated itself for the wedding was quite beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful. Quite beautiful to look at. By the way, who played Sunny Hope? Because I thought she looked exactly like...

Vestra. Yes. Haley Sims. I thought we were supposed to make a connection between, I thought as well, they were meant to be somehow connected and they weren't. I have a very big idea. I have a very big idea that just came up. Oh my God. Yeah. This is a Megalon theory. Megalopolis type idea. You did a shot of Megalon in the green room, so I'm ready for it. And Paul said a number of times, you got to let these men cook. So babe, just cook. Look.

You know what? Turn our mics off. Just Paul. Give him a spotlight. Yeah, just let him cook. Back to those nuts. Now, the what if Sonny Hope was an alien that he fell in love with and when she died, it's not like that he found the Megalon

in the ocean because that's where it crashed. It's like she is Megalon because she's an alien from that planet and that's why she is so intertwined with Megalon. That's why when he gets it on his face, he sees her. She is one. She gives him the visions. She's like an alien race that's trying to like help our race become more... Okay. I don't mind that. It's certainly not in the movie. You're doing...

You're doing a lot of work to help the movie because that is categorically not present. But I want to be clear. Upon getting shot in the head, Adam Driver is given Megalon treatments that ultimately make his head appear to be totally normal. Right, he's shot through the eye. Shot through the eye. He then takes Megalon and builds moving walkways with it. What are you doing? This is a medical breakthrough.

This can cure so much. And what he's doing with it is making moving walkways? What is Megalon? No, I think the Megalon was already, like, it was like this. It's like, we can use it for moving walkways, but what if we also used it for gunshot victims? Yes. Like, so, I think they just found enough. It's like George Washington Carver found a lot of things for peanuts. He also made a dress. God, you are nuts. Wait, what's going on? Are you okay, man? Nuts?

Wait a second, is this episode sponsored by nuts or something? Big peanut has got to be people. Is this festival sponsored by big nut? Big nut. Planters. Comedy fest. That would absolutely be a thing that would advertise on podcasts. Get big nut. Nut up. But I mean, but I think what we're saying is Megalon is a tool for

of an alien world. Right? Wouldn't that be so interesting to make a movie about that? Nope. But I mean, I'm just saying, even though the movie is not telling us it, that's what we are supposed to believe. It's not a material found on our planet. I don't think so. I don't think so, but I guess what I come back to is, is what, where,

Where else is Megalon in Megalopolis aside from the walkways? Yes. And it's Vestra's dress is made of Megalon. Oh! Only certain points, though. Right? Because when she's singing that song, she's in a white dress. And then at the end of the song, she's like... Well, I think that might be the Megalon looking like a white dress. Got it. Because the Megalon seems to be able to change its properties. So, you see, it's moving walkways. It's dresses. It's gunshot victims. It's everything. Yeah.

I mean, yeah, I guess. You know that they went to Taylor Swift for that part. I felt like they definitely went to Taylor Swift for that. For sure. I mean, it seems like it's a, yeah, I mean. Well, and how obsessed everybody was with the fact that she was a 16-year-old virgin? That old man bought for $10 million. $100 million. I'm so sorry, Paul, to correct you. $100 million to support her virginity?

That's what was so... I had to tip my hat to her, though. I really did, because I was like, this bitch is on to something. She's not getting money. She's not raising funds for them to take her virginity. She is raising funds for them to just sort of salute it. Oh, oh, oh. For sure. No, I thought the winner gets to marry her. Oh, I don't think... I thought the winner... Hang on.

We'll only hear from the architect in the balcony. Do you think that she was supposed to marry whoever it was? No. No, yes. There's a little bit of confusion. Okay, let's see. Who says no? Okay, shut up. Time stop. Who says yes? Okay. Interesting. I thought no. I thought everybody was supporting her virginity, and then they play the sex tape, and then it's revealed she's a 23-year-old non-virgin, and she's stuck on the Mac the Knife half moon.

Terrified out of her mind in some sort of coliseum where the wedding of the century is happening and people are being murdered? I don't know. And she's just also like hustling during this wedding and making a buck. Yeah. It's also like, why put a hat on a hat? Right? She's supposed to be a virgin. This movie loves hats.

Everybody's got a hat in this movie. We have not talked about the scene, and you know it was improvised, where Shia says, pick up my hat, and then they all throw their hats, and they all pick up their hats. That was truly clown work at its best. It was so good. I was like, this is so funny. My favorite character in the movie, full stop, is Shia's sidekick, who we meet when he's the tuba player in a parade band. Shia's like, hey!

And the guy's like, drops his tuba and is like, yeah, what do you want for the rest of the movie? The tuba player is an essential member of Shia's crew. What? And Shia's crew. What a glow up for the tuba guy. Shia's crew all look a little bit like Shia. One of them is Balthazar Getty, which is interesting. Oh. But here's what Coppola had to say about Shia.

He is an actor who, this is the quote, deliberately sets up a tension between himself and the director to an extreme degree and whose method was so infuriating and illogical it had me pulling my hair out. He then compared the actor to Dennis Hopper in Apocalypse Now. So not an easy shoot for Shia, right?

Or at least for Francis Ford Coppola. Because Cheyenne's doing a lot. Oh, is he? Oh, I thought it was pretty measured. But see, there are... Like, that tuba player, I would have loved the entire movie to be about that man's journey. That's an arc. That's a character on an arc. That's an interesting arc that I think I could understand. Yes, rags to riches. And is the tuba player the same one who decides to kill...

Well, he puts out the hit. He thinks he's killing Caesar. He's also the character who in the third act appears to have the character from the Marvel Universe bullseyes tattooed on his forehead. And I was like, when did he become bullseye? I think... I don't know. I don't know what went on there. One of my favorite moments was when Caesar Catalina...

finds out that he's going to be a dad. And by the way, this is often a trope in movies where men take so long to figure out this information. It's like, it's so confounding to watch. It's like, sir, you were a part of this. You have to have known this was a possibility. He takes a solid minute and we watch his face. And again, it's so compelling because it's Adam Driver. Go through every human emotion.

And land on your, we're going to have a baby.

And I just, you know, again, it's a trope. I see it in so many movies and it just delights me every time. The surprise. But he is, you're right, he is so good at landing preposterous stuff such as the scene when they then, he and his beloved Julia, they meet with her parents, so now his soon-to-be in-laws, and Giancarlo Esposito is her father, who is the mayor, who is his son.

sworn enemy. He's Cicero, and they are at odds. They are enemies. They play cards. But for the first half of the scene, Adam Driver's just carrying a casserole dish around, like an old-school casserole dish. Not like an old Pyrex casserole dish or a Corningware casserole dish. That's exactly it. It's actually what it is. The blue and white Corningware square, small-sized casserole.

Right? Casserole dish. And I was like, now what the fuck is this about? And why is he making it look so effortless? What's in the dish? What's in the dish? What's in the dish? What was in the dish? There was nothing in the dish. There's so much. There is so much here.

I mean, Saturnalia is Hanukkah, Christmas, New Year's. Oh, it's all of it. It's everything. It's interesting because you were talking earlier about how... It's also Halloween. Everybody was encouraged to improvise and all of this. And who is the true author of the movie? You know, Coppola has been writing it since the 90s. Actors were encouraged to write. But I would say a full quarter of the movie was written by Marcus Aurelius.

And just quoted by Julia. Because she speaks in just Marcus Aurelius quotes for, I'm going to say, four minutes straight. Absolutely. It is in, I will say, it is in WGA arbitration. I was looking at here just like, so when he originally announced the film, it was in 1989. He planned to move to Italy to work on two productions in the next five years.

And he called the film so big and complicated it would seem impossible. That's where it started in 1989. And that's where it ended. It's, by the way, true. And by the way, so he went to Rome to make Megalopolis. And a year later, he released The Godfather Part III.

What's interesting is that it is a New York movie. They talk about it being America. It is not interested in being Roman or Italian or anything like that. I think it's much more about...

I think what it is, honestly, if I'm really looking at it, I'm saying this is Francis. Okay, Paul, if you're really looking at it. Up until now, you've been looking at it rather obliquely. You've been looking at it like through a bag of nuts. Yeah. Just like. I'm trying to get into it. You're looking at it through like eclipse glasses. I'm taking out all the raisins of this trail mix, and I'm going to tell you what nuts are in here.

I think what he's trying to do was, I think originally he was talking about how the Roman Empire got corrupt and took this really beautiful society and it fell apart. But then Trump came and he's like, I'm going to do a politics version. So he took the original idea and he's like, politics, right? And then it gets really muddy. And then it's like, because I think that there's a couple of things at play. And that's what it feels like heavy handed at points. It's like, it's like,

I'm a populist. I'm for the people. But everybody is kind of like Trump at a certain point too because it's like they're all kind of villains. Shia is very Trump coded. Right, yes. And there is a whole section that feels very J6. Yes. Yes, 100%. But then I also feel like

But I also feel like... Okay, New York. New York's like, I don't know about that. We're on board for September 11th, but J6 was cool, right? But I also feel like...

The other person for the people is Adam Driver, right? Adam Driver is like, I am for the people. And then when he tells everybody, then they all get behind him because they hear his speech right before he's getting arrested or maybe that was later. God damn it, I forgot where. But yeah, the end of the movie really happens very quickly. Nobody's a good guy, right? Everyone's a villain? Yeah, because Adam Driver's a drunk and he's a mess and he's...

doing a lot of things. I don't know, but is he a good guy? I guess so. He's got this alien. No, I think everyone's a villain. Yeah, except for the baby at the end. Oh, yeah. You know what? No. I'm so sorry, June. The baby is a villain. I'm sorry.

I'm putting the baby in the villain category. I hate to disagree with you, but that baby was a fucking asshole. The baby is now the only person on the planet. The baby, yes, that baby's too powerful. How many years is the baby just like... Just scrounging around for food. Just waiting to learn... Little bits of milk. Yeah. And what happens to the people frozen in time? But also...

Also, what I noticed was when they would be frozen in time, time frozen, wind still blowing their stuff all over the place, blowing their dresses. So time is stopped, but the wind is still going. Right, right, right, right. You can't control nature, but you can control time. I was...

very upset because at this point I don't think we know or maybe we do know she can see him stop time. Yes, she knows. But she can't stop time herself. She's a time-stopping viewer, not a participant. She's a witness of time-stoppers. But now at the end she will be stopped. She will be stopped by the baby. No, but at the end when he says freeze time, she stops too. Or maybe she's pretending like Aubrey Plaza did when she was a statue in the bedroom.

Let's go to the audience and see what they have to say. Not once does he stop time and be a creep and look at boobs and stuff. All right. Come on. Hi, how are you? Good. What is your question? So you kind of touched on it, but the end with his speech right before everyone in the crowd basically wants to kill him. Right. And then when he's done with his speech.

They're all behind him? But like his speech meant nothing. Right. At that point, it would be really hard to get everyone back on board because they hate him so much. I know. But that's how convincible, that's how dumb you people are. That's how stupid you are. He says a bunch of words and you're all like, yes. And honestly, that's why the movie needed to be longer. Yeah.

That ending, I was like, now you're picking up the pace here? Why? Why now? We should have had a moment. Everyone's wearing great shirts out here. I'm not going to comment on all the shirts. You got a great shirt yourself there, sir. They're all how to get made shirts. Thank you for wearing them. Yes, okay, and you had the notebook. You did it all. I love it. What's your question? The question, well, it really was...

To June's point, who really was playing a lot of these characters? Have you guys ever seen characters fade in and out out of the credits? Because everybody had their characters named except for right at the end where the name title faded in and out of The Fixer.

Did you guys see that? No. Well, who was it? You're saying that, like, the Fixer wasn't a real person? Dustin Hoffman's character didn't actually have a name. Oh, I see what you're saying. But right at the end, if you look, the Fixer pops up right under his name and fades in and out right before it does. So maybe that's when we were being told who that character was, what his role was, really. Yeah.

Just right in the credits. I applaud you for watching the credits, sir. I do too. I applaud you. The minute the movie went to credits, I turned my brain off. I died a small death.

These guys have had their hands up very passionately. Now you're pulling back from it. No. All right, here we go. I came here because I... Okay. What do you got? Okay, okay. All right, here we go. Did Julia pretend to be a sixth grader in their meet cute? Was that what happened? Say it again. Yes, you're right. She sneaks into the office by pretending to be a sixth grader, but he sees through that very quickly. But I think...

She's also dressed like Red Riding Hood in that scene too. Yes. I firmly believe there are many, many scenes that were shot and are just missing that are the connective tissue for the absolutely bizarre nonsense that this movie does. Fair enough. At least we got to see Jason Schwartzman play the drums. Loved it. Loved it. I am in the balcony. Watch out, Paul. Watch out. Be so careful.

Hi, how are you? So what's your name? Marissa. All right, Marissa, what's your question? So at one point, like, the mayor's daughter, I forget their name, and then Caesar were, like, on the bed, and they were doing, like, patty cake. Oh. Oh, yeah. Do we think that was, like, before or after? They did it. Well, that makes me feel like, do we think she is supposed to be a sixth grader? Yeah.

Aftercare? Or was that like foreplay? Like, what's going on there? You know, there's parts of this movie that you all are reminding me of that I think I very intentionally tried to put away. That scene was one of them. This movie has such an unstructured Terrence Malick-ian kind of tone poem vibe, but none of it makes sense and none of it's interesting. Yeah.

It's as if there's a million puzzle pieces on the floor and we all remember a handful. I love a puzzle. I love a puzzle too. And what's your question? So they have like television and obviously like a Fox News type of thing. I'm just curious if this is like a future type thing. Like where's all the cell phones and laptops and things like that? The future is shockingly low tech. Is it the future? Yeah.

I don't know that this is the future. It's not. It's an alternate reality in the past. It's just new Rome. I think it's the future. I think it's futuristic. I mean, I only know that because, like, there's so many lesbians out and about. Yeah. And so I have to imagine that that's the future. I gotta say...

I loved, and I don't know why I didn't think I was going to, I loved Jon Voight in this. I think that Jon Voight did levels that I was surprised at. He played drunk, he played old, he played archer. But I do feel like he's doing a lot. I like when he's flirting with, he's flirting with whatever her name is, Champagne Wow or Sham Wow.

Wow platinum? Wow platinum. I will say this. The movie does look beautiful in many sequences. I thought so too. I was confused that there was actually a Roman Coliseum doing Roman Coliseum things. And one of the things was like, okay, chariot race. Got it. Wrestling. Got it. Guys running through walls. Weird. Don't get it. Don't think that that's a thing. Never heard about that. Looked cool.

felt anachronistic. Obviously, we had an opinion about this movie, but there are people out there with a different opinion. It is now time for Second Opinions. So if you care to find me, look to my Amazon. As someone told me lately, everyone deserves second opinions. And if I'm rating so low, at least I'm rating free. My love for Drop Dead, Fred Con Air, and Deep Blue Sea

It's time to find my second opinion. I'm gliding high in opinions and soon I'll match them in renown. And nobody in Amazon, not Jason June or even Tall John is ever gonna bring mellow stuff. Amazing. Amazing. That's it. Everyone go back to your seats. Great work. That's it. You're done. Get out of here. Great work.

You did it. You did what we needed to be done. Normally, we go to Amazon for five-star reviews. Unfortunately, there are no five-star reviews on Amazon. There are, however, 175,000 reviews on Letterboxd. And we went to the...

Five-star reviews, of which there are 5%. 5% of 175,000 reviews. Now, the most common rating, by the way, is two stars. Okay, so here we go. This is titled Portrait. This was a cute movie. And the people who didn't understand it are just dumb. I'm sorry, it's not even that hard. Five stars. Soup! Soup007 writes...

New York better welcome this in the next 20 years, bruh. Caesar got a fucking Crunch Lab and shit, what the fuck, absolute fucking masterpiece of a film by FFC. I don't care what anyone says. Sex, drugs, and Megalon. Five stars. Five stars.

MeJu wrote, if I had 120 million and was a film director, I would also make a film about the destruction of New York and the United States and dedicate it to my late wife. In my house, everything by the Coppola family is praised. Here it's a five-star film and fuck the critics. Anyone who's a fan of Coppola's Old Testament, the Godfather trilogy, has to at least be happy for the director's personal achievement. I love you, Franz, Ford, Coppola. I love you.

What you do now stays forever, heart emoji. Coops writes, like if you built a time machine specifically with the intent of bringing Shakespeare to the present day and asking him to write a script set about a decade from now inside of 20 minutes while high out of his mind, and despite all of that, the whole thing pretty much makes perfect sense.

I was on the film's wavelength from the start, and I stayed there for the entire runtime. One of the most sincere and optimistic films I've seen all year. In other words, I'm a big fan! Caesar clearly took massive inspiration from the Virtual Insanity music video during the design process. Oh, I would love it if when he's showing his in-laws the moving walkway, JK just walked out and was like, Virtual Insanity!

Shelby writes, to be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Megalopolis. The humor is extremely subtle. And without a solid grasp of Emersonian literature, most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. The fans understand this stuff. They have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes. To realize that they're not just funny, they say something deep about life.

As a consequence, people who dislike Megalopolis are truly idiots. Five stars. Here we go. Would you recommend this movie? Absolutely yes. Yeah, it's something to see. You New York! You're the best! Eat shit!

That's all from New York. We have a great t-shirt that we created that night, Sex, Drugs, and Megalon. You can get that at tpublic.com slash stores slash hdtgm. I love that shirt so, so much. My book, Joyful Recollections of Trauma, is available wherever

ever. You can get your books, your eBooks and all that sort of stuff. How did this get made is going on a giant spring tour. Head on over to hdtgm.com for tickets and information. We are going to be going to a bunch of new places that we've never been before, and we want to see you out there. So

Make sure you get tickets early because they've been selling fast. We'll also see you up at Sketch Fest at the end of this month. That's Dinosaur performing up there. And Dinosaur will be performing at Largo along with How Did This Get Made's rescheduled shows in March. So check the schedule. Check the calendar. Check the website. Check it all. And also, if you want to watch a brand new comedy show with myself and Rob Hubel,

Make sure that you are following Enter the Dark Web on YouTube. It's a weekly show where we find the weirdest stuff on the Internet and we challenge each other to test it out. Anyway, Enter the Dark Web. Rob Hubel, Paul Scheer. It's a blast. People, that's it for today's show. A big thank you to our amazing How Did This Get Made team live online.

on the ground in New York, and also here in Los Angeles. We will see you next time for Last Looks. And by the way, if you have a comment about Megalopolis, we want to hear them. Just head on over to our Discord, discord.gg slash hdtgm, and you can leave a comment in our Megalopolis section, or you could just give me a call. That's right. Leave a voicemail for me, and we will play them on the show if they're good. All right.

That's all for now. We'll see you next week for Megalopolis. Last looks.

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