#53 The Human Body
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Let's go, folks. Welcome to the Nate Land Podcast. I'm Nate, Brian, Aaron Weber. Welcome, everybody, to the podcast. I started with the let's go. I don't know if that's going to be the... I mean, truthfully, all this being said, I do think I get to decide what I want to say. I mean, that is true. So I enjoy talking about it and being in the mix, but...

How did it feel just now? Let's go, folks. It feels great. I like it. I like it. I like the specific. You threw a poll up on Instagram and Twitter. Let's go and hello, folks. Here's the Instagram results. 1,400 people. 2,000 people voted. 62% hello, folks. 38% let's go, folks.

What I would say is a lot of this is people that don't want change. Yeah. And that's, you know, Laura, you know who over here? People that are stuck in their ways. All three of our whys voted for hello, folks. Oh, did they really? Yeah. Did they listen to it? That's the thing, too. Did people listen to the... And hear the explanation and hear the context for it? Yeah, and everything. I don't know if Laura did. Yeah, Laura doesn't. Here's the Twitter.

hello folks same thing uh everybody still likes hello folks because we've been doing hello folks hello folks uh i'm not saying i'm against i like hello folks i think let's go folks is just stands out more yeah i think that's it's different hello folks is we're just saying the same greeting that's been said for 100 years yeah

Right. You think, well, a lot of it is in the inflection that you do it. I think that is unique in a way. Let's go folks. Well, even the hello folks. Hello folks. Hello folks. Yeah. I mean, who talks like that? Yeah. Yeah. I'm not changing the folks. I know. It's the, you like hello? I like, look, I like let's go folks.

But I wouldn't be upset either way. I think they're both good. I hear it a lot now in the wild, people using it, and it's cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But they're using it. That's almost kind of the thing. You hear it a lot, you just notice it more. People said that with One Fell Swoop, and I did the One Fell Swoop joke. And I've noticed it too. Once I started doing the One Fell Swoop joke, I heard a lot more people use One Fell Swoop.

And so it's like that kind of thing. When you say hello folks and we say it here, you start hearing other people say it, but they're not saying it because they're, they're one of us. No, I'm saying fans, fans of the podcast that I meet are using it. So I, I like it either way. No, no, I know that.

No, I know the fans are using it, but I'm saying that you notice it. I notice it like just on TV. Like you see, you just hear someone say it somewhere and you can tell that it's, you know, like let's go folks is way more specific and nobody's saying that. Everybody's saying hello folks, right? Based on the comments I read, there was a few that said after you railed on let's go for a few weeks, they just don't like the about face thing.

But that's the joke. I know. That's the comedy of it. He's co-opting it, ironically. Some of them said they just don't like Let's Go so much. They just can't even say it ironically. I don't either. And that's why we're making fun of them is for saying Let's Go, folks. It's like you watch UFC. You ever watch fighting? UFC fighting? If a guy gets in trouble, he doesn't go away. He gets closer. That's what this is.

If you go get closer to, like if you watch a guy and he gets rocked and he's got to get it back together a little bit, it's something you've learned in fighting. If someone's going to fight you, run at them. Yeah. Like they say that with a gun. If someone's going to shoot a gun with you, go to the guy. If it's a knife, run. Yeah. So it's almost like we're going. We don't let go so much. We're going. We're getting up in it. You're giving it a hug and locking up with it. We're locking it up. We're getting up in. All right. I'm sold.

That's, we're in control of the let's go. And we take it over. Yeah. And then we make it our own thing. We control the narrative. We're like, we control the narrative of let's go. Yeah. And every time someone says let's go, we enjoy it more because we go, folks. Yeah. That's what I think afterwards. Yeah. And I see someone, I see, you see it on this weekend watching,

Golf was great this weekend. They had eight playoff holes, I believe. Unbelievable. And you see, I saw a guy in the crowd just scream, let's go. Like he's, you know, like the lunatics. And I thought of folks and I didn't, I wasn't angry at that guy. Yeah. You know, I was like, all right. I thought of my own thing. It's not, look, it's not for sure yet. I, we're going to do, we're doing another, uh,

We can do another poll, but I want, we're not doing it now. Give it, let us breathe. We'll keep doing polls until we get the results we want. Yeah. We'll do another one. So how long do you guys want this to go on, if you know what I mean?

We, but I, we're do it again, but we, I want it to be a little, it needs it. Let's let everybody, I want you to think in your soul about this. Yeah. Get into it. I might switch. Let me think about it a little more. Maybe, maybe it's hello folks. Maybe I just want it to be back. Hello folks. Yeah. Can we have both? Huh? Can we do both? We can't. Yeah. You can do, everybody can do whatever you want, but I don't know what the point of, uh,

If it's the intro to the podcast, I'm not going to go, hello, folks. Let's go, folks. You're getting nowhere. That's how someone gets where they go nowhere in life is they go, let's just do both. Let's turn quickly. Yeah, that's what happens. You don't make a decision. You don't make a decision, you don't move forward. You kind of sit in the decision of two things. Yeah.

is that not true yeah i got way more serious than i was anticipating you pivoted that into like real life advice that's that is but i'm but that's uh that's why you can't just sit and do i mean i don't know that's you want you asked if we could do two i'm telling you the reason why i know but we just did a poll where overwhelmingly then he was like let's just let it sit for a while you did a poll was the episode even up

I put that out, I think, three days later. I mean, it's people listen to this podcast like on way. We're acting like we're alive. Like we're on a live show. It comes out. People listen to it. People are going to think about it. I'm letting people think. We're making a decision.

We'll come back. I'm on board with let's go, folks, but I hope the next poll is like 90% hello, folks. I just hope it's gone the other way. Don't just do that just to make a point. That's true. If that happens, I'm going to make sure. Answer honestly. Yeah, we're going to do another poll if that happens. If I see 90%, you better bet we're doing another poll. Just threatening them with polls. We'll do so many polls, dude. Guys, I'll do this poll podcast. It'll be about polls.

But you've already said you hate and don't trust. I don't trust them.

Look, I contradict myself a lot, and that's what it is. There was more than one pastor who have already said they accepted the challenge and did it. One posted a video, if I'm saying it. Let's go, folks. I saw that. Yeah. That was very funny. If you look at Nate Land's Instagram, he started off with let's go, folks. He did it good. He raised his energy up, and it felt good. But you know what I mean? That's what I mean. I think the hello, folks was easy. Let's go. He had to do something. Yeah.

Yeah. He had to get it in there. And his church was clearly a type of church, community church. He needs to come to a very old conservative church like mine and try that. Oh, let's go, folks. People would walk out. What's going on? Yeah. They would be fine with hello, folks. That's how they talk. Yeah. We're trying to get younger on this podcast. They would literally get up and go. Yeah. Yeah.

They wouldn't like it. Yeah, we can look. I want a fair. All I'm asking for is everybody be fair. How does this thing? I want everybody to just think about it. And then, you know, I was too. It made me think I know a fidget with this a lot. People always bring that up.

I bet you would fidget too if you were sitting here. It's so hard not to. Yeah. I always want to grip the bottom of it. Oh, God. It's happening. Here's a work hero. Yeah, who's this guy? It's a loose. It's getting worse. Let's go, folks. All right. Microphone's fixed, but I do get fidgety with it.

Also, let's read these comments. We can talk about some other stuff. David Womack. I started a new job this past week and I have my own office. I'm quite introverted and struggled. I always have trouble spelling quite. I just had it this weekend. Sorry. I'm quite introverted and struggle to meet new people. I was listening to you guys on my lunch break and a guy across the hall heard you and hollered, hello, folks.

Anyways, we're now best friends. Thanks for breaking the ice and helping me make a new office buddy. David, the fact that he's going to hear that you wrote that and probably bail on you. That would be funny. David, I heard Nate talk about, I was just saying hello. No, that's awesome. Bringing people together. Two guys, if they listen to this, they're going to get along.

I'd like them to vote on the hello, let's go folks. Yeah, they're debating it right now at work. What if they break up being friends because one's so bored of the let's go folks and the other one goes, hello folks is how we met. Hello folks is everything. Jen Stevens, let's go folks. It's like our secret handshake. That's what I'm talking about. It's a, it's, it,

Only us know this. It's so specific. That's the thing that kind of makes me go, it's so specific. No one knows, you know, let's go. It's just, it's ridiculous. Yeah. That's the joke. We're in on the joke. We're so much smarter than all the let's go folks. Chase Whitney. Hello, folks. Sound much more greatest average American. Let's go, folks. Feels a little like we're trying to ride a bandwagon because you're looking at it the wrong way. Chase. Uh,

If you're, you got to get it. It's not the, I get like we're doing a fairy saying that's very famous right now. Yeah. But it's, we're making a new one up. Hello, folks is not, everybody talks like that. Mm-hmm.

let's go folks is we're making fun of them and it's new and no one says, let's go folks. Yeah. Nobody says it's a juxtaposition of let's go the way younger people talk folks and the way older people talk, which is a big theme in your comedy. Nate is being in between generations. Yeah. Right. Yep. Look at that. That was a big one.

Ty Burham. Hello, friends. That's what we say over at Aaron Land. So hello, friends, is Jim Nance. Doesn't he say that with golf? I believe. Someone else says hello, friend. Hello, friend. I think Jim Nance says hello, friend. Again, that's along with... His famous thing is hello, friend. So yeah, Aaron Land would seem like a place where y'all would steal someone else's stuff. Yeah.

James Lackey. I have seen every episode. I watch every stand-up special on Netflix from every comedian. The closest I ever came to blacking out from laughing is when Brian says, Kent State Massacre. After talking about Vietnam and Nate says, good night nonstop. The funny thing about that, I rewatched the clip.

I wasn't planning on whispering massacre, like get to sleep. But I said Kent State, just Kent State. And you go, good night. And then I'd lost all confidence in myself. I was just like, massacre. You said it so faintly, dude. I watched that clip probably 20, 30 times. Who needed it to hear, needed to hear. That's a good way to put it. That's how you talk about stuff with your kid in the room. Yeah.

Kevin Gorey. Butch Allman. Nate has gone from inventing words to inventing humans. Watch out, folks. I guess it's Butch Trucks. Butch Trucks. Yeah. He was in the Allman Brothers. All right. Yeah. It's Butch Trucks. That's their uncle, right? Yep. I was wrong. Nick Buback. Nate with It's Weird That Usain Bolt Isn't There. Talking about the U.S. Olympic Trials.

Usain Bolt, the famous Jamaican sprinter.

I guess I meant, yeah, it was the U.S. trial. He should be in it. I'll be honest with you. Why would they not? He should just be around at all the trials. He almost feels like an American, doesn't he? Yeah. Because he's so popular. Yeah. Let him come. Don't you want to see what he would do? I would like to see what he would do. Well, give us what we want. Have him in there. Greg Louganis should go do... We should send Greg Louganis over there. Yeah.

Somebody from my generation. That's our guy. Send him to Jamaica. We give you the same bowl. Rusty Green. I think I know Rusty. 1985, during Live Aid, Phil Collins played the London show. After his set, he flew on the Concorde to Philadelphia and played that concert as well, making him the only artist to play both shows on the same day. That's crazy. Yeah. From London. Yeah. Flew on the Concorde.

Which some people pointed out the reason it was discontinued, some pretty major plane crashes. Oh, man. Concorde. 50% chance. That's how that was their motto. 50%. But you'll get there. That's their motto. I know it's only 50%, but always remember that's better than 60%. They go, 50% chance you get in a wreck. We could be 60%. And they go, that's true. And you go, all right, I'll do it. That's how they would get you into doing it.

50-50 if this plane goes down. Nicholas Wynkoop. If Aaron's dream is to be the reaction guy on the bench warm-ups, then he's literally living his dream right now. Yep. You said that. That's my role. You said that last week, right? That would be your... When we're talking about basketball, the guy who holds everybody back. Oh, that's who I would be. Yeah, the guy holding everybody back on the bench. The bench reaction. Yeah. I'm holding all the crew. I hold them back when we laugh. Yeah, from getting...

You let them loose a little bit. I'd be appreciative. Uh,

Tyler Gamil, or Gamil, while the Disco Demolition Night promotion was a complete disaster, the worst promotion night ever has to go to the Cleveland Indians where they put on 10-cent beer night in 1974. Fans were getting so drunk and rowdy that they eventually overran the stand serving beer and started carrying full kegs back into the bleachers.

Later in the game, one fan ran on the field and got into an altercation with an outfielder from the visiting Rangers team. When his teammates came to his aid, hundreds of fans stormed the field and a giant brawl erupted on the field. It got so bad that Cleveland's manager, fearing for the safety of the Rangers players, sent his own players into the action, armed with bats to protect Rangers players from their own fans. That does sound bad. That could be worse. Yeah, I looked this up. There's some photos.

I think it was Mike Hargrove, who was a longtime manager, who was the player, and he got into an altercation with the fans. And Billy Martin was the manager, and they ran out there with bats. And then the fans swarmed the field, and then the Indians ran out there with their own bats to defend the Rangers. Ten-cent beer night. I mean, a dollar gets you annihilated. A dollar. Look at that one picture of the guy on the ground there. They're just...

That's a fair... Just chaos. I mean, just so... And people drink before they get there. Yeah. So that's so... You think they pregame 10-set beer night? I think so. I mean, I'm sure you know what's happening. And like, they're... I mean, obviously, 1974, I mean, were they 30 cents full price? But they're... They were...

I like, it's like, I love the mindset of just going, it's tins of beer and I were doing some great for you guys. And everybody goes, yeah, dude, I, we appreciate that. We'll go bring our family and stuff and, uh, have some beers. And just to then a guy with a keg next to him and just looking out at the outfielder going, is that guy looking at us? Like he takes it personal and he's got his beer and he's on his, I mean, he maybe brought $2 and now that's his 20th beer. Yeah.

And, I mean, you know, the logic behind going to get the keg to go, dude, I'm not... 10 cents is... For 10 cents, just let me bring a keg out. I'll give you $40 and I should get the whole keg. I think a keg is 173 beers. So how much is that? So that's $17.30. No. Right? No. I think it's...

$1,700. No. It's not... I think it's $170. I would bet. I mean, yeah, $17.30. For a keg? Yeah, if you're doing 10 cents a beer. Give me the keg, keep the 20. Yeah, keep the change on the 20. Keep the change. There was one player who was involved... They're only making $17 on the keg? Yeah, I mean...

I don't know if they're making money on beer at all that night. No. What is 10% of seven? Yeah. That seems so, it seems so cheap that it seems wrong. Yeah. Yeah. I guess we'll find out next week. There's one player that, yes, exactly. We're going to wait a week to find out. There was one player who was involved in this game and the disco demolition night. He was in both of them. Oh, that guy should write a book. Yeah. First half of this, second half of that.

Some of these bars will do dollar pitcher night. It's just crazy. It's crazy how cheap these places will give it sometimes.

Yeah, thanks for that comment. It's your college days, right? Good night. Good night. That was worth a good night right there. Bringing something to the table. Let's go, folks. Yeah, you know, let's go, folks. Good night, folks. I mean... Try to put a button on that segment, you know what I mean? Yeah, let it. On to the next comment. I think it was. There was a button already and you undid it. And now we lost the button. That's what you did with that comment. You know, sometimes...

Cups are a little bit cheaper, and they have to raise it. I went to a place the other day, they charged you for Diet Cokes. I did go to a place, a restaurant. That was a great restaurant, and they charged you for every Diet Coke, and that makes me furious. Did you not find out until you got the receipt at the end? Yeah. 22 days. Yeah. You don't find out.

Sometimes they come up and say, it's insane. McDonald's ain't charging for every Diet Coke. If you go to a nice, it's like a steakhouse, and you charge. Look, if it comes in the bottles, you are obvious that's different. But if you're bringing too many to drink, you can't. When we were first married, Big J's birthday party, we'd go to this restaurant. I want to say it was called Ninja in New York.

And this is, we have no money. You know, this is, whatever, 15 years ago or something. And so we go eat, Laura's the only one working, and we go to this restaurant. It's like the first time really going to like a super, super nice New York expensive restaurant where your bill's gonna, you know, we got a large table of people where, I mean, I think it might be

Like a couple hundred bucks a person. You know, like it might be $1,000 for like a group of 10 people. You know, so that way you're like, dude, we've never done... I don't know. We don't know what this is. We went to Sparks once to get off the... First time we ever went to spend a lot of money on food. We went... This is how...

Southern and basically redneck we are. We go to Sparks, which is the famous New York steak restaurant where the mafia guy got shot in front of. Paul Castellano. Yeah. They killed him right in front of the restaurant. You ever hear that? No. Yeah, it was a big... They named Gotti. John Gotti. John Gotti. He became the new boss. Yeah. Killed the guy. It's like the 80s, right? I mean, it was, you know... And they got him right outside. And so we went there and ate. And that dying...

and they they you know we uh we went in there and ate and it's like a big famous it's a great steakhouse and so i remember the check being like two hundred dollars and then we took a picture of it because we just never i mean we we couldn't believe ever go like what do you mean yeah this is insane this is insane two hundred dollars for food like that's crazy and we remember we took a picture of it and just like we're just a bunch of dumb rednecks uh

But they, so the Ninja thing, so they come over and they bring, oh, we were drinking Diet Coke. This was forever ago. And I mean, it's like $30 worth of Diet Coke. And we're like, Laura was livid. I was too. Like, it's just crazy to be like, tell us. Like, come up and say, yo, man, we're charging you for Diet Coke. So you went to a really nice restaurant and ordered Diet Coke? Yeah. I drink Diet Coke everywhere.

I thought those were your drinking days, so you would have probably gotten a glass of wine. He had just done 10-cent beer a night. I think we were already on edge with how much this was going to cost. This was before Sparks, and so we were worried, too, like, let's try not to go crazy. Just get a bottomless Diet Coke. Yeah. We were not trying to spend too much.

and then uh and it's one like new york is very big it's jay's birthday now we're all gonna pay for it and we all everybody it was like everybody's pitching in and that's also new york too they do that with uh i remember a girl i worked in chicago uh kristin and she uh had she was from new york she had to go to a wedding and she was the bridesmaid i remember she had to buy him a gift and she was like saving a

she was like working, taking extra shifts because she's like, I got to go and give, it's going to be like 500 bucks. And I was like, what? You got to give someone a gift worth $500 like for a wedding? Like you're not your, it's not your daughter getting married. You know, it's, you're just a guest at the wedding. And they were like, that's what they, that's what they do in New York, which I kind of like it. New York is like, it's very much,

It's very sweet. It's very nice. You're really giving them a gift. But that's kind of the expected number? I mean, I think they spend a lot. It's not like in South, you don't give...

giant gifts. I mean, I think you give, I think a hundred dollars would even be a lot for a lot of, like you wouldn't even give that, but it's, you know, I mean where you are and stuff like, yeah, obviously the grandparents, they probably do a little more and stuff like that, but a friend, friend, I don't think you would ever expect someone to get, I remember I was like, golly, that's kind of crazy. Yeah. You gotta, you know, they gotta buy the dress. They got, so it costs this person $1,500 to go to your wedding.

Just one person. I know. I got him a plunger for his wedding. You did, man. That really made me laugh. He got me a plunger. Oh, yeah? For the really nice plunger. I don't know what's special about it, but it looks really nice. It was on your registry. Okay, yeah. And then the description, I opened it up. Who got us the plunger? It was from Brian. I said, I want you to think of me every time you use this. Yeah. That was really funny. Yeah. Yeah. Opposite. Yeah.

The opposite of really nice. The opposite of $500. Yeah. It's a really nice plunger though. You just spent more money at 10 cent beer night. That's very true. For many years, the single guy would get $20, $25 gift as a wedding and then

Yeah, but I think that's what you... But I didn't progress over time. I mean, I was doing that up until two years ago, and then my wife's like, we got to up it a little bit. Got to give them... A little bit more than that. Somebody sent us, and it wasn't labeled, and it was this kit to like...

where my wife and I are supposed to like body paint all over it. Oh, God. It's the weirdest thing we've... I was so... It's from Nate. Well, dude, I mean, I read this... It had this guide of what to do. Like you cover yourself in paint and then the two of you together paint...

paint on this canvas and we were this is the weirdest thing ever and we found out it was a comic that sent it to us as a joke yeah but but reading through it we were like this is who would send us was it hard to do though that's how you button some up uh becky hurley

The reason it seems unbelievable that Ronaldo was able to tank Coke's stock by $4 billion is because, well, it is unbelievable. This is a situation where people took correlation to equal causation and ran with it. All right. I like Becky's. I like Becky's response to that. I like someone that comes in and goes, eh, probably not true. I looked it up, and stock market was just way down that day across the board.

So when he had his press conference that morning, Coke was already down $4 billion when he did that. And by the end of the day, I think Coke was actually up from the previous day. It just happened to be at the same time, but it already dropped. It's crazy how big Coke is that just like $4 billion is just, now it's just a bad day that day. I was just talking about that, but there's stocks with oil and stuff. Their company will be worth $2 billion to $30 billion, and it's all like in a week.

It's all make-believe, though. That's what I'm starting to think. Where's all this money? The older I'm getting, the more I'm so confused with going. I think there's something you're like, how does everybody have money now?

It seems like everybody has money. Like everybody, you can't, all the kids can't be doing, building a pool construction. No one, there's no lumber. There's no anything. Everybody's got money. Like we went through a pandemic and everybody's just richer now because of it. Like a lot of people are. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm not saying everybody, but it's, it's just seems crazy to me. Like everybody's like just doing better. I just, it's all, it's where, where is it? And all the money's like,

There's no concrete money. It's all just kind of like, you know, they have $4 billion worth, $9 billion worth. Like, what is that even? It's all just like moving around. I don't believe any of it. What is the stock market? Curare fan. Curare fan. C-U-R-A-R-E fan.

Wrong description of rope-a-dope. More commonly, Ali would be against the ropes, away from the corner, and cover his head while his opponent would be punching him out till he got tired. Then Ali would make his comeback after conserving his energy. Still pretty wild strategy, though.

I looked up that video last week. That wasn't even the right video. Yeah. That video is pretty amazing, though. If you kept watching, he like boops the guy on the head and just totally messes with him. But that wasn't George Foreman. Yeah, that was. Or a rope-a-dope. So it was just nothing. That was like a known nobody boxer or something. A guy that's great, obviously, but not. He ain't doing that George Foreman. B. Andrew Scott.

If the band says their name is just Eagles and you don't have to add the to the front of a sentence, you wouldn't say the Metallica is a legendary band or the Duran Duran were great in the 80s. So you could say Nate performed for a member of Eagles. All right. All right. That makes sense. But at the same time, you wouldn't say what time does Titans play today? No.

They're going up against Jaguars. Yeah. Does it have something to do with being plural? I wouldn't be friends with that person. If someone said, hey, what time did Titans play today? I'd be like, you got to get out of this house right now. And he goes, why, dude? He goes, we're about to get started. Let's go. Dude, get out of here right now. Are you kidding me? Can I have a Coke? Or no, can I have Coke? He came and said, yeah.

He never says the. You know, Coke stock went down. I don't know that. And I'm trying to think of the. Maybe I don't say the that much either. Honestly, I might be talking to myself and I'm going to have to ask myself to leave. Aaron, does that have something to do with it being plural? Or I feel like, yeah, I feel like that does play a role in it. I don't know. There you go. Yeah.

I learned the hard way not to try to add a little thought there at the end. I'd love you to add a thought, just if it could be good. That's a lot to ask. It's going to be a while. It's going to be a while. We're working up to that. We're having a new poll. Let's go, pals. And I'm like, now let me tell you something. I know y'all are going to sit here and

I'm trying to separate even us, the folks of this. I'm going to get my own group. I'm getting down to just me and the guy that runs Aaron Land, and we take off and do our own thing. Matt Conrad. Ken Griffey Sr. was supposed to be on the Marshall plane that crashed. However, he got his girlfriend pregnant the year before with Ken Griffey Jr. and decided he needed money, so he signed a minor league contract instead of staying on the Marshall football team. Wow, that's crazy.

That is crazy. Did we talk about too... Did we say Wahlberg was on that 9-11? Someone texted me that. Did we talk about this? I don't know. I don't either. Talking about plane crashes. Oh, maybe that because they're talking about plane crashes going down. Like King Griffey Sr. is supposed to be on it. Like, you know, that's the 9-11. Mark Wahlberg was supposed to be on that flight. So was Seth MacFarlane, I think. I didn't know that. Supposed to be on the flights. Yeah. I don't think King Griffey Sr. actually signed with Marshall, but I think he was...

about to, and then he got a minor league contract and he needed the money. But he would have been on the team the year that happened. Yeah. That's pretty crazy. Pretty crazy. Yeah. So the lesson there is don't go to college. Yeah. Yeah. When did we talk? What did we talk about with that? The 70s, the plane crashes, Marshall and Wichita State. We talked about my brother too. Yeah. Yeah. True. I don't remember anything.

All right, everybody. We also wanted to give a shout out to Frank Turner. He sent us a book, Plato and a Platypus Walk into a Bar, Understanding Philosophy Through Jokes. You know this book? That's a great book. I've had that book for a while. Yeah. They kind of go through all the different types of philosophy and explain it with one-liner jokes. Yeah, yeah. It's really cool. That's fun. Yeah. Do some reading. Yeah.

to go let me see so what do some reading yeah shove it to the end just go oh that's wonderful get rid of it got that pin uh no i know i will be reading i don't need the pin uh you had to get it i had already i'd already gone all the way over there uh no no i will read it uh

I'll read it. I like the idea of that. It's fun. Yeah. The learning through that. So we have a, uh, one thing Vanderbilt's playing. If you're, I mean, we're watching this Wednesday, so hopefully they're, hopefully it's over. Maybe they're not playing. They just swept, uh,

We will be finding out. I'll be watching it tonight. This being Monday. And Vanderbilt got into the – people that don't know, College World Series. Vanderbilt got into it. They were supposed to play NC State in an elimination game. NC State had players that get COVID, and so they had to cancel. And they did no contest, so they're not letting them play, which is terrible. No one wants that, dude. Vanderbilt doesn't want that. Yeah.

No one's on board with that. It's insane. They shouldn't even be testing these kids. It's unreal. I mean, just you can't let – you're letting all these fans go in and watch games. It doesn't matter. It's like let the kids play. No one's – but there was a lot of like crazy stuff. People started attacking Vanderbilt like we had something to do with it. You're like Vanderbilt had nothing to do with it. I was just watching like a guy on their news. He's a guy in North Carolina like their news –

was like, I don't know, why don't they go test Vanderbilt then and all this stuff? And I'm sure they did. They did, yeah. And then just like someone that you go like, all right, dude, don't bring, like you think it's us? You think it's Vanderbilt doing that? I would be upset, but it's not like I'm going to be like, well, Vanderbilt should be kicked out too. Like that doesn't make sense. That's their logic. How about you go get mad at the NCAA? We will support you. We will be on board with that. But don't start attacking Vanderbilt because now you're starting to make me happy.

Well, as a Vandy fan, it made me mad that I see some non-Vandy fans post, congratulations, Vandy, on your next national championship. They're saying that because we got a rest pitcher for an extra day. It's a no-win situation. If Vanderbilt wins, well, of course, they got a big advantage. And if we lose, then they're going to be like, can you believe that? Yeah, well, go win. Mm-hmm.

And then let it be known. We did get that extra day of rest. What do you want us to do? And then we prepared. It's not like Vanderbilt's garbage. It's not like we're lucky to be there. We're dominant. We haven't played great, but what we did in the Stanford game was unbelievable. And so we're awesome, dude. One funny thing was I saw an interview, and I don't know when it was, with that coach, NC State coach. And I like that coach.

But when he said something, he goes, I don't know what's going on. There's a bug running through our team. And you're like, I don't know. Maybe don't say that. Like, I don't know what that was. That's all I thought. I was like, just don't mention that. I don't know, dude. Everybody ate food last night. No one could taste it. I don't know. We're having a weird tournament. Anyway, next question. And then you get tested. They're like, well, we got to test you now. And you're like, well, yeah, don't say that.

there's some kind of cold running through your team during a global pandemic. Just kind of keep your mouth shut and say they're injured. Maybe they can't say it. I don't know. That was very funny. Yeah, dude, cut it. Don't mention. Say they all torn their ACLs. That would be better than, you know.

than saying we got a cold. Doesn't know about COVID. Yeah. I guess I'm going to bug. You got some bug running through us, you know? Uh, anyway, so, uh, and you guys had a good weekend, right? Yeah, we did. You did, uh,

Chicago Zanies. Four sold out shows. A lot of folks came out. That's really cool. We were talking earlier, when you're meeting people after the show and you're shaking people's hands and podcast fans would go, hello folk. You're talking about it being a secret handshake. That's what it was. They just kind of throw it in there so I knew.

yeah so that was really cool thank you to everybody that came out yeah that's awesome see i think the let's go folks too gives them more energy let's go folks like it starts off you have to bring the energy up a little bit yeah and so when you're when you're meeting and it's it's it's uh you would you would feel more comfortable being like let's go folks and it's a joke i did get some let some let's goes too okay yeah it's out there could use them on the poll

Let's go. Maybe you should have went to Aaron's show and been sitting at home voting on this poll because I could have used you. Yeah, it was fun, man. Really cool. Yeah. I did an outdoor event Saturday, charity event. Anthony and Lee and Cooper are big fans of the podcast. Listen. And it was fun. But it was obviously outdoors. It's so hot. People were, there's bouncy houses. People are spread out.

But to his credit, Anthony, without even asking, he just gets comedy. He got everybody to come move to the front. Oh, great. So we'd all be up for even move the chairs up so they'd be a little bit more in the shade. And then when I was done, you know how we all have examples of crazy things we have to follow. Yeah. When I got off stage immediately after that,

There was some guy there whose wife is struggling with cancer, and they're really down on their bills. They gave him a new car. It was parked right behind the stage there. He starts crying. Then that guy gets up, tells this incredible story. Everyone's totally forgot about me at this point. How he died once, but God brought him back from the dead. He had a reason, a purpose for it. Everybody's crying. And I just told Anthony, thank you so much for not...

putting that in front of me instead of... Please, thank you for doing it afterwards because we've all had to follow. You had to follow something similar to that, right? It was like a soldier. They gave a soldier who lost his legs in Iraq. They gave him a car. He walked out. His name was Nate. They brought him up. They go, these two, these guys, they were giving the car away. It's Michael Finney's car.

I got my billboard behind me and uh it was a great event he would do a golf tournament and it was I have a bunch of magicians on him and comics my dad would do it I got to hang out a lot of old comics like a lot of guys that did Carson and were on Carson a lot and it was it was always so fun to talk to them about 70s and 80s comedy and then in the boom and you know uh

So I always loved it. And they were always so funny, dude. These dudes would just murder. Like there's just such a difference. That old comic mindset. I performed in the round. It was the first time I ever did that in Phoenix, which I've done now since then. But it was one of the first I ever got to do. And when you do the round, one of the best was, I'll have to get some of these guys' names. I'm blanking on the names. I think Tom Dreesen was there. Tom Dreesen has been there.

I met, he talked to my comedy class, comedy college. And, uh, when I first started comedy, Tom Dreesen came and spoke. Yeah. Uh, which was pretty cool. I mean, it was like very, when I, when I first started in 2003 and then I would say, it's funny to start and then go see him again later. Like, uh, not that he remembers me, but I'm like, you talked in our class. Yeah. Uh, and then you're doing comedy and you're like in it. Uh,

But they, I'll get everybody's names. I'm going to try to, because you could look these guys up. They're all very, very funny. And the, so we do, when you perform in the round, you can get confused on where you're at.

And so you don't, you're kind of like, cause you kind of make a circle. I love the performing in the round, especially for me. I don't move a lot and it makes me kind of make a circle the whole show. And so it makes me move a little more, which I think is, is a good thing. And so this guy gets done and there's exits kind of everywhere, but there's only one exit off the stage. And,

And he just walks down the wrong way. And so it's a circle. And it's very easy to get disoriented because you don't really know where you're at.

And when you spin, so he goes, all right, everybody. And he walks down this ramp. And then everybody's like, you know, everybody goes, give it up. And they keep going. And like, I mean, like three minutes. And then he just comes back on the stage. And he's like, the door was locked down there. And he had to go out. And they go, no, you go out that way. And he walked out the right way. But one of them, they gave this vet game. He lost both his legs. He had prosthetic legs. And these dudes that were giving the car away, they go,

We're going to go up and talk. And it's never good when someone doesn't really know how to talk. It was three of them. It's either they're going to do two minutes or 40 minutes. And you don't know which.

Like they're either going to be too nervous and just fly through it or they're going to start liking it and get a couple laughs. Yeah. And then they're going to keep and you can't get them all. It's not going to be great. It's not going to be great. Either way, it's not good. Yeah. And so they went the 40 route and did a lot, a lot of time. And then they bring out the guy. And now that they've the show's gone long, they have to bring me up pretty quickly. So they bring the guy out. It's very awesome.

give it up nate they give him his keys to the car he's crying the whole audience is crying they're like all right everybody please welcome nate bargetts and they bring up immediately me and i'm like oh my wife is mean like just whatever i mean i have nothing and i just just like basically get through the set for six minutes you know never maybe get a laugh on the last joke but it's like no and then the show kind of went back to normal yeah yeah fun that is tough uh also a big thing that happened this week uh

uh which we have video planet fitness is no more it's gone it's gone you've moved on moved on with my life man i felt like it was time and i think somebody pointed out that you both correctly predicted that this is when it would happen it would be a couple weeks after i got married yeah well yeah when lucy starts looking at all the the nonsense bills you you're bringing her a

an education she has to pay off that's going nowhere friendship class in Notre Dame she's like oh great I get I just get loaded with I don't know the most expensive debt on earth I mean you know he brought MTSU and that was he went to college 45 years ago so he's been still paying it off he's still paying it off

Pays off a dollar a day. It's a thing like it's the cost of a cup of coffee. You could sponsor me. Yeah.

Has your college been paid off? Yeah. Yeah. And then mine didn't exist. My parents paid mine off. It was $1,500. I had a joke where I said it was $40 cash. Truthfully, it was $1,500. Yeah, not much less than the actual amount. $1,500 is all they... Because my parents once... I mean, my parents helped at one point everybody with their college debt. And I mean, mine was... They didn't even... It was like a... They told our family...

kind of together like they said uh you know like my brother and sister kind of was like almost like a christmas present and on mine i was like what was mine they're like i don't i think we did yours like fine we didn't bring it up like it was like not even worth mitch it was not even worth it was it was it was just not enough to even really matter like it's and i paying some bills yeah

They lumped in, you know. So, your Planet Fitness, which we have the video. I'm sure some of you watched it. It was on air. We reposted it, right? On Nate Land. And then, so if you haven't, we're going to play it for you. It's a quick video.

I'm joking. That's always the word someone says like that. Guys, don't worry about it. I know you are. It's a pretty quick video. It's going to go through quick. I wouldn't play it if it was that long. No. You ever heard of somebody showing you a video like on their phone and you tap it to see how long it's left? Yeah. And then you see it and you're like, come on. Yeah. No, this was a very, very funny video. How are you feeling? I feel good. I feel like it's the end of a long chapter in my life.

but I think the start of something greater. Hey Allison, my name is Aaron. I am a member of this particular Planet Fitness. I was hoping to cancel my membership over the phone. Unfortunately, I don't think we'll be able to do it over the phone, but we do have other options available for you and I can go through those with you. I've given them $10 a month for four years and I've never stepped foot inside the gym.

I'm not just doing this for me. I'm doing this for the thousands of people, men and women all across this country who have never gone in to play the fitness. That's who I'm doing this for. I'm going to miss not going. It's a big part of your life for a long time. It's supposed to be the last four years. It's been a big part of my life. But it's not going into this gym. So, yeah, I think...

I'm nervous, but I'm also excited. I'm excited about what's to come. I'm excited about what else I'm not going to do. There it is. The official membership cancellation form.

Was it? And you said. Pretty special. Literally 90 seconds. It was that easy. Oh, dude, it was the easiest thing in the world. They don't care at all. Dude, the guy was like my age. I walk in. He goes, hey, I like your shirt. Very sarcastically. And I go, oh, yeah, I'm here to cancel my membership. I don't like your shirt that much anymore. Is that what he said? Yeah, like a funny. He goes, all right, just give me your phone number and I'll cancel it.

I think you could tell you were coming in to cancel with that shirt. You walk in with that shirt. I'm not coming in to work at all. And jeans and boots on. This is a man that's here to cancel. You don't have to say it. It's either cancel or sign up. Right. My intentions were pretty clear walking in there. I feel like they knew. How much money did we figure out that you gave them? So it's $10 a month, and then there's an annual fee of $10.

I think $70 or something like that. So, so it was enough that I should have canceled it. Let's do the exact number. Four years would be on a podcast. We'd like to hear the exact number. That'd be $480, $480 in, in just the monthly fee.

Plus, I think, a $60 or $70 annual fee. So that'd be another $280. There's a computer with a calculator. Yeah, well, we can do the math. $480 plus. I just want an exact number so we can have something fun to talk about on a podcast that's went out to a lot of people. 70 times 4? There you go. That's $280.

How long would y'all's podcast last? Would it just be a lot of like, man, that'd be a pretty crazy day, huh? And you don't talk about the day. The whole podcast is just y'all going. You mean just me and Brian at a podcast? And it's just, you know, it goes, I went to McDonald's the other day. How much did you spend at McDonald's? Quite a bit. All right. So let's move on. Or was it funner to go $30,000? That's crazy.

Pretty fun. Almost $1,000. Over four years. That's it. I think the annual fee is a little bit higher than that. I don't know for sure. So $760 at least. Yeah. At the very least. Yeah. $1,000 probably the worst. Over four years. That's not that much. No. But man, that's so many people that are doing that.

I put that on TikTok, the amount of comments, I mean, hundreds of comments of I've been paying for Planet Fitness for years, never gone in. You've inspired me to come in to go cancel this week. And then I got a lot of comments that were like, I run a Planet Fitness. Thank you for this because that allows us to be so cheap. You basically subsidize to Planet Fitness for four years. Yeah. And that's their business model. And it's very, very effective.

It's a, I'm for their business model. Oh, I, I, I don't begrudge them at all. It's like, it works. It works. We, if we don't do it this way, the people that do will work, use this and can afford $10 a month is like, there's a lot of people that do actually get better and healthier because of that. Right. And then there's a lot of views that are going to die off in groups because you're, because you're a counselor. Yeah.

You're wearing a McDonald's hat the day after you canceled Planet Fitness. You can at least fly your true colors now. That's right. I don't have to pretend anymore. You don't have to pretend anymore. I finally be my true self, man.

Did they respond to you like Planet Fitness themselves? Planet Fitness liked the vid. They commented on it. They said distance makes the heart grow fonder. That's such a good answer too. It's funny. They're great. They have a sense of humor. All right, I'm going to sign up for Planet Fitness. I had a Planet Fitness. I think I canceled.

My mom would have gotten... Your mom went in there and did it for you? Maybe. You think you can... You've probably had it for 12 years. Yeah, whatever, yeah. You've been making fun of him. Yeah, we have. Yours is the thousands. And I'm the white whale that they're like... Yeah, I'm Newman that they... Scott Flaa. I've been chasing Scott Flaa. They've been chasing forever. Yeah, I do like their business model being like, no, look, we don't care. You can cancel. But...

If you're too lazy to go work out, you're too lazy to cancel. But you're not too lazy to go sign up because that day is a good motivating day. And it's also cheap enough that it's not... It's forgettable. You'll forget a year easy. You just won't even notice it in your credit card statement for a while. I remember they would go in and someone would say they'd have pizza parties. I think Louis...

told me that. It's very funny. He's talking about going to work out there and he's like, hey, go in there like, hey, today, now we're going to have a pizza party. And you're like, yeah, that's not... They have like cookies on the way out, I think. It's pretty crazy. Yeah, that's good though. You're just trying to get people to do something. The people that work out real serious...

they're the ones that are like you're like yeah dude you do your own thing that's where you go to your own place right this is not that it's a judgment-free zone judgment-free zone no grunting right we'll turn the lunk arm on oh yeah yeah that's what it is do they have you ever seen it look honestly dude i kind of walked in there as i'm standing waiting yeah it kind of looked like a little bit of fun yeah looking around a lot of people you thought like oh i should have uh should have got a membership yeah

Would you go back and get a membership? Maybe you and Lucy get one. No, I'm never going back. I can't. I've moved on. I want you to go back now. I come out with the black card I upgraded my bad head. I got to talk me into it. So that brings us to what we want to talk about this week, the human body as our topic. Yeah.

I don't know. I think it's going to be interesting, right? Yeah, I think so. It's pretty fun. I think so. You guys, well, there are 78 organs in the human body. Let's name all of them. Is that everybody? Unless you've had an appendix taken out.

You think there's like 70, but is there one guy that's like 79? Is there one human that is 79? With an extra organ? Could be. There's got to be one. A mutant. Yeah. There are five vital organs. Yeah, I was going to say, back up. A mutant. Mutant? How do they say muted? He's still saying it. I struggle with the word. Mutant. How did you say it? I don't know how to say it. A mutant. Mutant. Mutant. Mutant. Mutant.

A mutant. A mutant. You would be, if they had like Wolverines, if the X-Men was real. Yeah.

And you just have to – you would be who they show on the news. We don't want these mutants in here. And then they go. And that's how they would – That's how they'd fight back. I mean, that's probably – you might get a role in the movie, to be honest. I mean, if I was – if you're – if you make – whoever makes X-Men is listening to this, and you want a good Southern, you know –

Person that's not acting. It's, we don't want those mutants over here. They ain't going to come to my plane of fitness and work out. Just the lunk alarm is going off the whole time. And it's Brian over in the corner. Well, get on out of here, mutants. I could say a rival would or two. Everybody has their words. Yep.

Bartholomew. Bartholomew. Wow. There are five vital organs essential for survival. Can you guys guess them? The brain. Your turn, Nate. Heart. Yeah. The lungs. Yep. You need at least one of them. Kidney. Right. At least one. There was one left. The liver. Boom. You guys nailed it. Pretty easy. There's only ones I could name.

Ask us to keep going. You can still live a fairly normal life without one of your lungs, a kidney, your spleen, appendix, gallbladder, tonsils,

It goes on some of the things. And if you're yourself, artificial replacements and medication, you can remove your stomach, colon, pancreas, salivary gland, thyroid, bladder, your other kidney. And if you want to keep going, you can remove your eyes, nose, ears, larynx, tongue, lower spine, and rectum. Kind of get an overall, you know, trying to cut some weight. Turn around a little too much.

And so I started getting rid of stuff and a garage shell. Reminded me of Kramer when he went to, went to Lane with him to sign his thing to not stay alive. She's like, yank it like you're starting to mow it. Like you're starting to mow it. Because this says, supported by machines and intensive care unit, they could also take away your skull, heart, and your remaining lung, at least for a short while. Yeah. Yeah.

You can still go to the coffee shop. Just keep it. Question number three. You could eat, but machines do everything else. She's like, I would stick. He's like, that's right, because I'd still go to the coffee shop. Most of this stuff, spleen, pancreas, gallbladder. I had to look up what they even do. Yeah, what does a spleen do? It acts as a filter for your blood.

It recognizes old or damaged red blood cells and removes them from your body by breaking them down and saving any useful components. Probably would like a little more respect than we're giving it. I feel like we don't give it any respect. I know. We're not even right now. I think it would be like... It's the name. I'm kind of keeping things clean and good. Yeah. Got a pretty big role. Like, I would say the heart knows my name.

Like, you know, like it's, that's how you tell the heart. Yeah, dude, I can walk up to the heart and talk to it. I don't have to.

It's not like the heart's like, who's this guy? What organ is the heart? Like, who is that guy? That's the Conor McGregor. Who is that guy? It would probably be the lungs because I learned that one lung is smaller than the other because of the heart. Yeah. Because the space in your body. The heart's right next to it. So wait, that doesn't make sense. In which part your heart would know about the lungs?

Well, I was just thinking about as far as respect. The lung has to bow down to the heart. Yeah. I mean, it's like the spleen. Doesn't even know he exists. Doesn't even know. What is your toxils? The heart's like, what? Yeah. What are you even? Who let you in here? And you're like, you're barely in. That's what he would say. You're barely in the body.

You're outside the box. You're so close to the exit, dude. When I need to know what the weather is, I'll hit you. Other than that, beat it. I'd rather talk to the tongue. Disgusting that is. That's what I think the heart is. The tongue's a big talker. The tongue's a big talker. When I need to know the wind direction tonsils, I'll give you a heads up. But I don't think you... You got some nerve coming down here and thinking you can mix it up with us down here.

And then the spleen is, you know, respected. Yeah. The large intestines is about five feet long. Small intestines, 22 feet. That's pretty long. Yeah. Yeah. Very long. I think I knew that. I didn't know the number, but I knew it was really long. And you knew the small intestines was a much longer one? I think I did know that. Yeah. I don't know if I cared. It's going to be a long next hour there. I'm giving you the good stuff off the top. Yeah.

There's some parts of our bodies that... It's only going to go downhill from here. I can't wait. Let's get to the interesting stuff. We're way past that. Yeah, I'm done. Some parts of the bodies that we don't need, scientists say because of evolution. The appendix. That's one of them. It used to be when we were only eating plants that the appendix served a function, but now it says it serves no real function.

But we still have it. We still have it. Yep. It can kill you. Yeah. If it eruptures. Yeah. Might as well get rid of it. Might as well get rid of it. Do you think there would be a day where they get rid of it? Like the tonsils? Like they just want to go. There's no reason for it?

I mean, I think that's one reason they get rid of it pretty quick. That's such a weird, arrogant thing for doctors to be like, you don't even need it anymore. You're like, well, it's in there, buddy. Why don't we leave it alone? Guy that just showed up in the room. That's what I want to say to these. You know, we don't need that. You should get rid of it. Should I? Should I just run in the store real fast and go get rid of my appendix? How many of you throw that in my head and let it live? Better have it and not need it then. Yeah. Then turns out we need it at some point.

Wisdom teeth serve no purpose. I have three. Did you get them taken out? No. No. Still there. I got my tonsils and I have my wisdom teeth. So you got all the organs. I brought everything with me. That's right. I'm a loyal guy. If you show up, I bring you. You want to see the end of this movie? I let everybody come. Yeah. Yeah. And on the night, y'all just start bailing on your, you start getting rid of people left and right. Yeah. I bring them all.

It's funny that you still have your wisdom teeth because the reason it says that we get rid of them is the human brain grows larger. It reduces space in the mouth, crowding out the third set of molars. But over time, brains have gotten bigger, so there's no room for them, generally speaking. So my brain can't grow as far? It may not be as big. That's why they get to stay. How big can they possibly be?

I mean, where is this? Come on. Well, this is prehistoric man they're talking about. Although, why don't we address that when you're reading this stuff? But I mean, there's some cases apparently that... This is like the most story in 1997. It still works today. You know. I haven't got mine taken out. I have three. I figured that. I have three. I don't know. That's a very funny put down to say to someone and they go, I don't know, I wasn't too that. Yeah, I explained a lot. That makes sense. Goosebumps. Goosebumps.

Goosebumps. Great books. Says our ancestors' hair would stand up to make us appear more threatening to predators. Goosebumps said this. It seems like they would say it.

That's how you read that. Goosebumps, like the way he talked to a spokesperson of Goosebumps. He showed up in the room. He came in and he's like, hi, everybody. That's how Goosebumps only talk. What's up, everybody? Welcome to the... And you're like, all right. Hey, hey. And he goes, but if I relax, I'm going to go away. All right. I'm really excited right now.

What did you say about them? I forgot. I was about to ask for the fact again. Goosebumps make your hair stand up on your body, which makes this seem larger to predators. Kind of like when a cat's hair raises up on its back. It's to scare away predators. Oh. Oh. It's like peacocking? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I don't know if goosebumps does that too much. I mean, yeah. I mean, I guess this is prehistoric man. Yeah. Are we getting to...

Now, man, I'm just trying to... Yeah, I'm just talking about some parts of our body that we don't need anymore. Yeah, we don't need goosebumps anymore. Well, they don't serve a purpose to scare people off. Well, maybe they do. But generally speaking, that's not what they're used for now. Male nipples. Most men don't need their nipples anymore. I got dumb fat ones I'd like to get rid of. Every fetus starts out as a female. And eventually testosterone causes it to either become male or female.

That's all going to change pretty soon. I think that's what you're supposed to say. I'm going to get rid of that. Have a special show and make an announcement. Get the pink, the tailbone. Our ancient ancestors used to have tails. You have a tail in the womb, right? As a fetus, you have a tail.

I'm pretty sure some people are born with them. Yeah. I mean, it's pretty rare, but people can have tails. Yeah. Just to have to cut a hole in your jeans your whole life. Yeah. Just that alone. Just the tailor cost of, it's like you're playing a fitness that if you have a tail, who had a tail and what movie did they, uh, George, or Jason Alexander is a tail. Oh yeah. Uh,

It's the one where Jack Black. Yeah. Bates Gwyneth Paltrow. Yeah. I can't think of that. I regret looking at that. Sorry. My bad. Guys, don't look up vestigial tails. Yeah. Did you just know that word? No, it's on. I Google human tail. Oh. And then that's what it's called. Well, look at the people also ask. Can a human have a tail? Yeah. Yeah.

Humans do have a tail, but it's only for a brief period during our embryonic development. There you go. It's most pronounced at around day 31 to 35 of gestation, and it regresses into the four or five used vertebrae, becoming our coccyx. In rare cases, the regression is incomplete and usually surgically removed at birth. So if you're born with one, they usually just take it off. But I guess maybe if it's too big, they're like, this kid is just going to grow up with a tail. Oh, if it's too big, they can't. I don't know. I mean, why else would they leave it around?

I just be different. Just to set the kid apart a little bit. Yeah. We all need a thing. We all need a thing. We all need a gimmick. You had Planet Fitness. It's gone. Yeah. That was like your tail. Yeah, but I could have been the tail comic. Yeah. I could have.

Yeah. How was that comment last week? Well, he had a tail. Yeah. What'd he talk about? A lot of tail stuff. You can tell which jokes he liked. He's wet. He's wet. Oh, he likes this one. Oh, here we go. This must be his closer. Here comes the punchline. He got really going up there.

Knocking the water off the stool. Everything turns around. There you go. I'm sorry. Everything's got to be in front of him. The curtain's moving. When he walks to the stage, he's like, can I walk to the back a different way? You get hit in the head with a backpack on a plane. Boom, boom.

An average-sized man eats about 33 tons of food in his lifetime. Well, give or take. It's about the weight of six elephants. That's how much we eat, six elephants. That's all. You know, you'd think he'd eat more elephants than that in a lifetime. You would have guessed more than that? Six elephants? If you think, just think of it in the elephant realm. Yeah.

African elephant. You're going to eat the big ones. The big ones. Yeah, you're going to eat six of them. And they brought you six and they go, that's enough for your life. I think. Got a ration. Yeah, like day one, they just give you six elephants. You got to make this last, buddy. For your life. Yeah. And then once you got to the first one, you'd be like, that's a little quicker than that. I'm four and I'm already done with one.

Then two run off and you're like, I didn't know how to lock them up. And now you're down in three. And you're like, oh my God, I got heat.

I flew through that first one. And the other two kind of caught wind of what was going on. And now the third one's, they're pretty old to be honest. Can I get more elephants? They go, no. We gave them to you and then we gave them to you. The average person produces enough saliva in their lifetime to fill two swimming pools. Probably a little bit more than I thought. I don't think I would have thought. Two swimming pools?

Of spit. Yeah. Yeah, that's a lot, dude. Mm-hmm. That's way more than I would have thought. I mean, I would have guessed like a... This table? Yeah. Like a cup? Yeah.

I'd say like 10 gallons. Yeah. Yeah. How often do you spit? I used to spit a bunch when I was a kid. Well, you didn't have to come out to count. Just the sloth in your mouth that you swallow. Well, then how do they count it? I don't know. They don't know, dude. That's an excellent question. There's no way a person even knows that. There's just zero chance of that. There's zero chance I believe a doctor could ever know this or a scientist.

I just go along with it. Yeah, right. That's what you do when I tell you stuff. Two swimming pools. Come on. I don't know. Maybe. Maybe not. Who knows? Yeah.

They can find slob whatever they want to. If you go, I got about one filled. And they go, they can find some more. And they scrape together. And that pool starts changing a little bit. And they go, that's a pretty big pool. That's an Olympic-sized pool. You go, well, you said pool. So above ground, kid's pool. Kiddie pool. Yeah. What kind of pool are we talking about? 50% of your hand strength comes from your pinky finger.

That deserves a little more respect. The pinky finger? Yeah, 50%. You mean like grip strength? Yeah, like lift that cup without your pinky. You can't do it, can you? Yeah, no, you can't. But it's twice as hard. That was so easy. I mean, I think the most famous way of drinking is to drink with your pinky off the cup. Yeah, what are you doing?

I guess you don't want to bring your dumb gorilla hand in here knocking the china all over the place. The cut Larry. The cut Larry.

You're like, could you take your pinky off? Sorry. And then you're like, oh, I'm like a ballet dancer. Speaking of cutlery, did you see the interview with, I mean, I know you didn't, but Demi Lovato was on doing some interview and they asked her what her favorite dish was. And she was like,

Oh, probably coffee mugs. She thought they meant... She thought they meant like dishes. She talked about it for a while. Yeah. She was like, they can hold hot stuff. Yeah. The interviewer was like, okay, that's not really what we meant, but... Did you just let her go and then correct her? I think they were just nice about it. That's good. It's funny because no one ever goes, what's your favorite dish and means?

plate or yeah cup or well who would ask somebody that yeah what's your favorite thing that you put food we should just say food that's because the person it's a weird way to word the question yeah what's your favorite dish that's a person that's kind of like you just ask it like we're talking dude like be normal yeah and just say what do you what's your favorite thing to eat yeah like don't say dish you say a dish the dish the guys the whoever asked the question is the problem

You think? I don't, but... I can't ever imagine thinking somebody's asking me, what's your favorite, like, plate or saucer or anything? I know. I agree with that. But, like, why she gets confused is because how many people go, what's your favorite dish? And mean, like, food. Like, no one really says that either. I know you say...

in the right circumstance you can say but if you're asking me 100 questions yeah just ask what kind of food i want to eat right it's no one's fault and i look yeah i know that this is a funny thing yes but i would say before we before you rail on one person let's talk about the other person be like don't say weird dude don't like no one says it like i agree that was a strange way to word it humans are the only animals with chins we're the only ones

According to this. Yeah, according to this. You're telling me a gorilla doesn't have a chin? According to them, the chin has to go at least straight down or forward. It can't just proceed backwards. Yeah, that's what someone says. A scientist says he got called out. And he goes, no, but it's got to go back. And you're like, all right, dude, it's a chin. Yeah, they pull up a gorilla. I mean, he's got a chin. It looks like a chin. Looks like a chin to me. Type in gorillas, do they have chins?

This is what we've got. This is the human body episode. This is our tagline. The gorillas have chins. Even chimpanzees and gorillas, our closest genetic cousins, lack chins. Instead of poking forward, their lower jaws slope down and back from their front teeth. It looks like a chin. I mean, that looks totally like a chin there. Yeah. Let's read for this. A chin-stroking mystery. Yeah. Yeah.

What was it? If you go back to it, it said one thing is what animals have chins is the question. Humans. Humans are the only animals that have chins according to them. We're the only ones that can say it.

That's why. That is true. I'm sure others have it. They'd love to tell us about it. But they can't. You can see like a lot. Like an elephant doesn't have much. You know, it just like goes down. It's like a lip. It's got that trunk to cover it. You could have an elephant. You could let him chew on your arm for quite a while. And it just would be like, it'd get slobbery. You're like, all right, dude. One of the ones you have to eat. I'll tell you. And he starts eating you. You can't do that. I... And he said...

The elephant goes, we were provided one human to eat in our lifetime. That happened. Yeah. But the human doesn't know that. So it's them against each other. And he doesn't realize it. He's like 16. He finally goes, are you serious? And then they come together and they die alone at 17. Your liver is the only organ that can completely regenerate itself. If someone donates their liver to someone, their liver will grow back to its original size in about six months.

I did not know that. It's like a lizard's tail. Yeah. Or fingernails. Someone's got to give you one. If you lost your liver, yeah. If you donated your liver, yours would grow back. Oh, mine would grow back. Oh. So we should people just give livers away. Mm-hmm.

You should give them away a lot more than you do. Once a year, just get it out of there. Yeah. You think that works an unlimited amount of times? Or at a certain point, is your body like, how long are we going to keep doing this? I Googled, could you donate a liver multiple times, and I couldn't find an answer to that. Yeah. There's your answer to the first question. Yeah.

I mean, you start just asking a couple other questions. So I can do this forever? And then he goes, I don't. And that's when he goes, you know, we're the only ones that have chins. And you go, are you serious? That's how they get you off. You go, a gorilla doesn't have a chin? You go, well, it doesn't. And then once you start challenging that, he goes, you know, you eat six elephants a year. Like in a room, you go give me six. Like you don't even know what's happening. Yeah.

All these answers can't. It's the next question just destroys the one before. I don't know, dude. I mean, why would I look that up? I know one buddy of mine, his liver grew back. That's what he told me. That's what he would get down to. I got a buddy of mine. A friend of his. His liver fell out and it grew back. Can you imagine donating your liver? See you guys in six months. I'll be back. Your body sheds about eight pounds of dead skin a year.

most of those cells settle as dust in your home oh that's fun that's that's what dust is a big portion of dust is dead skin cells i feel like i didn't need to know that yeah well you had to fill some time so we had to do it uh i'm just saying i got plenty of stuff those are the good ones though i'm saying i want to be pretty aware of dust when i get back home yeah it's just just dead skin floating around how did i know that

Well, that seems like one of the easier ones. It seems like it makes sense, but I don't know. No, the amount that you just leave a human locked up for a year and then... See how dusty their house is? Yeah. Yeah.

You've lost weight. Oh, wait. Yeah, yeah. This place is a mess. I remember seeing a story about a study, you know, people that do medical studies and stuff for money, where they paid a guy, I think, $30,000, $40,000 to just lie down for months and never get up. I was thinking about that. How much did you make? That was good, Brian.

What did they do? They just wanted to observe the effects of being horizontal for a long amount of time. So these people volunteered and did it. And they got paid a lot of money to just lie down. Yeah. And they said it was pretty rough. Yeah. Just being on your back for months. Could they stand? Yeah, that's got to be...

It's got to be crazy. I'll look that up. We'll come back to it. All right. How fast could the human body run? So far, the fastest anyone has run is 27.5 miles per hour by Usain Bolt. One of America's greatest runners. Yeah. He's got the world record 100-meter dash in 2009. That's the fastest. But if you went 15 miles an hour for four minutes, that'd be the four-minute mile.

15 minutes 15 miles an hour for a mile would be four minutes i should say that's been done right yeah but when floyd baxter broke the four minute mile it never been done and then right after that a lot of people started doing it but that was a big milestone i feel like yeah mentally you just know we talked about that right like it can be it can be once you know it can be done then you're like oh we can do it was it roger bannister i think floyd bannister was a baseball player

Is it the people that made banisters? The banister brothers. The banister family. The banister brothers? In a helm, yeah. A couple ne'er-do-wells. Yeah, the least honor they made was from this track stuff. Yeah. And now someone's broken, for two miles, broken the eight minute, which is even more impressive. Somebody did two miles in seven minutes, 58 seconds. Oh, we can keep going forever.

When will it stop? But can you? There's a, there's a, theoretically there's a, there's a limit. Yeah. You can't run a mile in 10 seconds. Right. Where is, where is the limit? What is, yeah. When does it stop? Yeah. When does the body reach? When can the human body not get any better? But everybody's body is always going to be different. You're going to grow. Like, that's what you always see. Everybody always says it. Like, look at kids now. Yeah. When you see young kids,

like kids in high school, you're like, were we that big in high school? Like, I don't remember being that everybody's so big. Yeah. And you're like, I don't think we were that any, I mean, we had some kids that were that big, but it feels like kids look older now, a lot quicker, uh, you know, uh, all this kind of stuff. So yeah, I don't know. Does it,

Yeah, it is crazy to think, like, when, what would stop? Like, Usain Bolt was the fastest. Someone's got to be faster than him. Yeah, you think hundreds of years from now, his records will look silly to people. Yeah, I don't know if they, silly, I mean, they always, the records always look silly anyway, and the fact that it's always like 0.5, and they're like, well, that's ridiculous. It's not, in your head, you want it to be like eight seconds. Yeah.

I mean, Katie Ledecky. Oh, I watched hers. Did we talk about that? We've talked about her before, but did she just do the Olympic trial? Yeah, she did the Olympic trials. And I'm so, I mean, she doesn't even. Did she get it? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, dude, no one's even. Did Simone Biles make the team? Yeah. Okay. And then, so the girl that came, the race was the second place. And the girl that did it was 15th.

which is kind of crazy. And I like, yeah, because I have it. I think I got to record it because it was a show Harper. But this girl was like 15 and then she died.

She does it. But Katie Ledecky's, she's got the world record for her thing. She's the first 23 records of the world record. 23 are all her times. 23 world records. 23 world records. One through 23. And I think it's the 800 is her. And 24th is the next best person that's ever lived.

Next best person is 24th. When they showed it, they go one page and they go to another page. And there's not even like one in the middle. It's straight her. It's crazy. And so like with her being that fast, yeah, I don't know. Maybe someone's going to catch up. I mean, she beats them by so much. They're not even in the screen. You just watch her. And you can almost just watch the second race.

And they'd be like, oh, yeah, by the way, just so you forget, Katie's racing and she's going to win. She won a while ago. She won a while ago. Now we're trying to do the second half. She's up there getting a Diet Coke at the concession stand.

And she's backing popcorn. You're like, oh, she's not racing this? No, no, she finished. I feel like from the sports episode. That's what I'd want to see is how quick can she get out and go do something before they finish. That's what they should do. Katie, right when you get done, I want you to go. Can you get a hot dog in the third row? Could you, by the time you get done,

I don't know. You've eating half the hot, like you've, no one's going to come and go, did you buy that hot dog? They realize you've eaten enough of it. They're like, oh, that's your hot dog. And how far up the stands can you get? Can you go buy it?

You know, like, have you already showered? Could you change? Could you have jeans on? Yeah. Could you have jeans on by the time everybody else finishes? That's what I was going to say. That would make the Olympics more interesting. That would get ratings up. Then she's got something to race towards. Yeah. I mean, what is she racing to? Yeah. Well, I want you to go get some, you know, have some jeans on a hanger.

in the locker room and she's got I don't know even she gets to the end that she jumps up and sprints yeah she's got to run and go put some jeans on I love that yeah that would make it awesome I feel like from the sports episode we talked about another swimmer that was coming on that they thought was it the 15 year old are they saying she's the next big thing

I don't know. She barely won, but I'm sure she's 15 and she's going to the Olympics. She's got to be. Yeah. But no one else is even close. Close to Katie. As a general rule, a person can survive without water for only three days. What's the rule? Three days, three weeks, three months? It's like water, three days, food, three weeks, three weeks.

Something else. Three months. I don't know. You heard that oxygen three months. I don't know. Uh, maybe it's air three minutes, water three days. Yeah. That's all through three weeks. That sounds right. Uh, people who have had hunger strikes though, have gone. You need that. You need that. You need that number though. You need it to all be three. Just so you remember. Yeah.

Like that's how dumb we are. Should I stop holding my breath? Then you go like, no, dude, three, three, remember? Three, three, three. You go, oh, yeah. Because I haven't been drinking water. My body, it feels fine. But you do this every time. You always think it's four, four, four. And that's three, three,

Three, three. Always remember that. Three. Just every three days, do something. Every three of something, eat, breathe. Just get three. Just put it on your bathroom mirror. Three should be your favorite number. Yeah. People who've done voluntary hunger strikes have gone up to two months without eating. One guy died in prison after a 66-day hunger strike.

So you can go a lot longer without food, is what I'm saying, than you can without water. How long could someone go without sleep? The record? 264 hours, which is just over 11 days. Man. Can you imagine? 11 days. Tristan just sent me...

a link to apparently this is what i was thinking of this is the three days three week three months rule of adopting a dog oh it had nothing to do with what we were talking about i still think there's some i think there's something to what i said i think i i've heard that okay well you make me feel like a real idiot over here it's it all about yeah three well maybe it's four four four yeah yeah i feel like i can hold my minute i can hold my breath for

Not three minutes. I could do over three minutes, no problem. Over three minutes. All right, I'll get to that. I'll skip sleeping. No, the sleeping thing I don't know. Sleeping stuff is good. You think you could hold your breath for over three minutes? I think if I absolutely needed to, you can always do it longer than that. Oh, I mean, all right. What? Of course. You're like, if I gun to my head, I'm forced underwater.

That's what I'm saying. I think everybody could do everything. That's another plan. This is how the Krispy Kreme challenge started. This is what we've been reduced to now. Holding the breath challenge. I'll eat as many Krispy Kremes as you can hold your breath. I don't think I'm going to get that many. Let us lock you in a thing for three minutes. Like a what? A coffin or something? My dad has a lot of magic stuff. I can get to a lot of things.

That can lock you in water. Oh, water. No, water is a different. Well, it's got to be. Are you a cheater? Well, how are they going to make you hold your breath unless you're underwater? An honest guy. Be truthful, dude. And you go, I swear to God, I'm not doing it. You just talk like that. I promise you, I'm not breathing. I promise you.

I found it. I'm sorry to you, I'm not breathing. The survival rules of three. I don't think that's a touch screen, if you don't mind. Handling that computer like a gorilla just got it. You just bend it backwards and...

I mean, your pinky is the strongest part of your, if you don't mind jamming it through that. I mean, that bent backwards like that was. I got it, man. Hold it by the base of it. Yeah. I mean, could they have made this infographic any more difficult to read? Three seconds without. Let's follow a little loop-de-loo down here. Yes.

Three seconds without hope. Without hope. What is that? If you have no hope, you can't survive three minutes without air, three hours without shelter. Three days without water, three weeks without food, three months without a companion. I go golfing in four hours. What shelter do I have? I guess the cart. I've walked three hours without shelter, like in a hurricane. I think it meant extreme heat or cold. Yeah.

This is three weeks without food, three months without water, three days without a companion? No. I mean, no, three months without companions? It's crossed up. This is the worst. This is the worst chart I've ever seen. Oh, they're saying which one's true? Why don't they just put it right next to it? It's all supposed to be true. I can't have three months? I can't survive three months without a companion? It seems like a dream. I'd like to try.

Fantasy camp. I had to call my wife in two weeks. How long do you microwave? Oh, he's got another one here. Yeah. Another graphic rule of three. Okay. Three. You can survive without air or in icy waters for three minutes. You can survive without air or in icy waters for three minutes if

You can survive for three hours without shelter in a harsh environment. You can survive for three days without water. You can survive for three weeks without food. There it is. You can? I know. You can survive without ice and water for three weeks. Oh, I read that.

That was all. That was the guy, the dish question. Yeah. How did you read it? I was reading it completely wrong. I was the dish guy asking her that question. That's how that was being read. You can survive. Like it's like it's a positive. Like you can survive. Like I easily can survive. But they're saying that like, no, this is all you can do. Yeah. Three hours without shelter in a harsh environment.

Which those naked and afraid is that three days without water, three weeks without food. Wow. All basic. Your body tells you this. Now, if you don't know those rules, you've got the four steps. Well, maybe you're good if you don't know the rules. Maybe you can do four days because you're like, well, I didn't know there was three. And you go, how did you not die? Well, I never heard of these rules. You can actually go to four. I went 48 years without a companion. Yeah. I mean, come on. Barely had shelter. Yeah.

So sleeping, a 17-year-old high school student set the world record for longest going out sleeping. That was the guy who went over 11 days. But after three or four nights without sleep, you will start to hallucinate. I bet I could do longer than people. I could do longer than a normal person. I never just nod off. Really? Never. I mean, no. You never just watch golf on the couch and just fall asleep? No.

And the only way is if I like really did something, like if I am not on much sleep and I'm laying there and like I could close my eyes, but I don't like,

I never wake up and go, I've been asleep for an hour or something like that. Like, I never nod off. I mean, I try to think. Yesterday, we had our golf club championship this weekend. And I've been getting up at like 7 every day. And I don't go back to like 2. So, I'm not on much sleep. And I lay there and watch golf. And I would close my eyes trying to go to – but I'm trying to go to sleep. I don't ever just like – just nod off. My club championship, I just missed the top 25.

this weekend yeah 26 there's only 26 players that was my big thing all weekend was to go just trying to battle out for a top 25 how many players are there 26 uh what's the longest you guys have gone without sleep

uh because you slept probably a couple days you slept for 24 hours i slept for over 24 hours once yeah i used to pull all-nighters all the time and in school and i think i've done two in a row i think i've done 48 hours yeah maybe a little less than that i think i've done about the same like you know you choose some like your weird flights or you're not and i don't just fall asleep i have a hard time

Kind of getting there. So, yeah. What's yours, Brian? I remember once staying up in college all night to finish a paper and turn it in early that morning. Yeah. So it was probably close to 24 hours. Yeah. But that's it. I need a lot of sleep. Yeah. Like a koala bear. Yeah. I don't know if they need sleep. I think you're right. Don't they...

Yeah. Don't they sleep most of the time? It feels like a koala bear. Yeah. Don't you think? That's probably a good animal to describe for you. It's like a sweet animal. It's like sweet, weak. They sleep 18. Has to stay kind of really up and high and head and can't afford to get attacked. Wouldn't last long. Wouldn't last long. Koalas sleep 18 to 22 hours a day. So you nailed it. Yeah. Yeah.

But they did a study on people's sleep habits and found if you regularly got four hours of sleep at night, that was the equivalent of adding eight years of aging to your brain. So it's bad. Yeah. Yeah. Bad to not get sleep. Yeah. Yeah. That was word of like the can thing. At first I'm like, oh, it's a good thing. Wait. Yeah.

All right, so now we're getting to breathing. How long could someone go without breathing? Permanent brain damage begins after only four minutes without oxygen. So that's a three through three is a lie. Well, if you get to four minutes, you're going to have brain damage. So yeah, maybe stop at three. But what's the record of holding breath? So the record just got set. March of this year, a guy in Croatia held his water underwater for 24 minutes. Held his water underwater? I'm sorry. Held his breath underwater. Yeah.

He brought his own water to this? Is there some water that's a little like, oh, why is the middle of that water looks weird? Yeah. I don't trust these results. So how long? 24 minutes. He held his breath underwater for 24 minutes. That's longer than an episode of Friends, they said. Or any sitcom. What? What was the record before that?

I don't know. David Blaine's done it for like... Yeah, I'll say David Blaine did it. I remember this. David Blaine did it for 17 minutes. So 24 minutes to beat it by seven. New Yorker for oxygen-assisted static acne. What is this? 17 minutes. I just don't know if I believe this. You can hold your breath for 17... And this dude did 23 minutes? He said he trained his heartbeat to slow down and...

Yeah. If you can train yourself, yeah, your pulse is so slow when you're holding it, like 10 or something. Crazy. It says most people can hold their breath somewhere between 30 seconds and two minutes. Navy SEALs can hold their breath underwater for two to three minutes, sometimes more. And they did 23 minutes. This one guy did 24 minutes, 37 seconds.

But I want to, is there, is it just as simple as holding your breath? Like most of us have seen. I got to be honest, that does not look like the guy who I think would have the record. That guy looks like he has no lung capacity whatsoever. Yeah, he's like in his 50s or 56. There he is right there. But he did it to raise awareness for people.

He broke the world record for the longest. This is the first I'm hearing about it. I mean, he's got brain damage. He got brain damage like eight times over or seven times over. Not seven, six times over. And then you're going, he's like, well, I'm raising awareness to what? It was up there in Croatia. Can you imagine coming out of the water after 24 minutes? They're waiting to interview you.

What's your favorite dish? Yeah. Coffee mug. Sorry. Plate. I don't know why I said that. Let me just catch my breath for a second. You go, I don't know why I said coffee mug. It's stupid. Plate. You know. I'm sorry. Let me get my brain. A bowl. A bowl. That's, yeah, okay. Go ahead. And they're like, no, your food. Oh.

It says he broke the record for the longest time breath held voluntarily. And they stipulated that like somebody, somebody who didn't want to held it for 30 minutes or something. Yeah. It's a great Seinfeld joke. The involuntary, the bobsled. Yeah. Involuntary. It's the luge, right? The luge. Yeah. He goes, ah, they put you on it. He goes, didn't even want to do it. World record. Like just threw him down there.

So how long could a person live? A recent study said that even if you survive all diseases, like they cured cancer, everything, and you didn't get hit by a bus, the longest our bodies can just hold up is somewhere between 120 to 150 years. Pretty long. Yeah. The world record is 122 years. Wow. That's the longest person to ever live? Mm-hmm.

Just seen everything. When did she... When they died? She died in 1997. I mean, just... Man, she was born in 1870. She said, I want to see Nate graduate. Yeah. And then I'm out. 1875 she was born? 1875. So, I mean, she remembered the 1800s. Like, talk about... She was an adult in the 1800s. She was an adult. Yeah. She could drive. 25, I mean, she was... Huh? She could drive. She could drive. They didn't have cars. Not legally, yeah. Yeah. She...

I mean, that person's got to be like, what is it? So it says she's born 1875, 25 in 1900. 1925, she's 50. Yeah. She's 50 in 1925. But she didn't just die. She died over 20 years ago. She couldn't vote until her 40s. You know, that's pretty wild. Yeah. And then she stuck around another 70 years. Yeah. Yeah.

Good for her. So there's a lady in West Virginia who holds the record for recovering from death. She was declared clinically dead for 17 hours after doctors failed to detect brain activity. Her son stated that her skin had already started to harden. Her hands and toes were curling up. They were already drawn up. She was taken off life support and funeral arrangements were in progress. However, 10 minutes after being taken off life support, she revived and recovered. Yes, you do.

I tried to see if she was still alive. I got hit by a bus on the way out. I know, I know. Oh, man. This happened in 2008, and I Googled her name to see if I could see if she's still alive, and I couldn't find her. Velma Thomas. How could you not find her? There's Velma Thomas's, but not the one that... I don't think that's her. Is that the story you read? The ABC News? Yes. This is not the right person at all. All right. I'll get back to it. I mean, how does this...

I mean, you can Google me and find a lot of stuff out. And a lady that... She lived until she was 94. Thelma Thomas passed away in 2019. It's super easy to figure that out. Well, that's not her. That's not her? Well, she was 59 in 2008. So unless she really aged when she came back to life, that ain't her. Things just move a little faster after an experience like that, man. So, yeah. I mean, I found that person, but...

Woodbury, Tennessee. She's from here. Different Velma Thomas. There's a lot of Velmas out there. A lot of Velmas. I didn't know that was an actual name. It's a good name to survive death. That's how this story. I mean, I knew Velma from Scooby-Doo, and I thought that was a made-up name for the show. No. No. Scooby was. Is that what got you headed that direction? Was it because you said Scooby? What? What do you mean?

Because Scooby was a made-up name, and then you said Velma. You go, there's another one. Pretty good. No. It's just I've never. There's Dale. Have you ever met a Velma before? Velma lives in Woodbury. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, we can't even find out if she's still alive. Yeah. You don't know her. She's doing fine. I don't know if I've ever met a Velma. Yeah. Yeah. I've never met a Shaggy either.

No. But Shaggy sounds like a made-up name. Yeah, so does... That's why I said so does Val. So does Scooby. Because it's like... Scooby's a dog. The rest are people. Don't ruin it for me. I haven't seen it yet. Shaggy is like Shaggy Clothes.

I was thinking Shaggy. I know Dan Shaggy. But they're shaggy clothes. Like Shaggy's like a... He was like a hippie, right? Velma's like a name. Yeah. He's a what? Like a hippie? Yeah. I would think Velma's just like an old... Like Myrtle? Yeah. Myrtle's... Yeah. You know? I've never met a Myrtle either. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah.

So how much exercise is good for you? Oh, geez. All right. Here we go, Aaron. Why to moderate running? Runners have lower risk of death than people who don't exercise. But in a surprising turn, people who ran too much actually had a greater risk of death. Yeah. Ha ha. All right. Take that. Get some... Get some good stuff? I mean... What? That's... I think we've been doing some good stuff. We have been, and you just went exercise. I was getting to Mr. Planet Fitness over here. I was...

I just read basic. Hey, everybody, if you run, it's good for you. But if you did it too much, I guess it would be bad for you. I think most people would think the most extreme athletes would be the people best in shape. They are the best in shape. They're absolutely the best. But not the healthiest. I would bet they're the healthiest. For you to even get to that level, you have to eat better. Did you hear what I just read? That if you do extreme, you have a greater risk of death. Because you're climbing a rock.

You're on the side of a cliff. That's why. Like, you're not, you know. This is ultra marathon people. Yeah, you're putting yourself in heat exhaust. Those guys are in the, their activity that they're doing can put them in a bad position, but they're healthier than a guy that runs in better shape than a guy that goes, I run a mile a day. Mm-hmm. Yes.

Scientists believe weightlifters have reached their saturation point by how much we can lift. Like there's not going to be any more. Yeah. The record for heaviest deadlift, the guy lifted 580 pounds from the floor over his head. He lifted over 1,000 up to his thigh. 580 pounds? Yeah, over his head.

that's so much this guy looks weak dude these guys i mean these guys look insane the world's strongest men yeah they they just they look like you tell me me and them are the same thing no you're healthier yeah that guy's gonna have a heart attack i think they have chins uh do you guys know how many bones we have in our body

206? Yeah. Yeah, that's what you were going to say too, right? Yeah, I don't know. I was going to say, I don't care. But 206 is a good one. Yeah. All right. You're right. I don't care. But we're born with 300. But then some of these bones fuse together. Where? Where are that? In the hands? Mm-hmm. More than half of your bones are located in your hands, wrists, feet, and ankles. It's a song. Head, shoulders, knees, and toes. Yeah. That's where that came from.

Yeah. All right. So it gets some steam going. I do the human body episode with Andy. Every episode. Yeah. Every second, your body produces approximately 25 million new cells. Where do the old ones go? That's a good question. I guess they're dust also. Yeah. They become dust. Well, the spleen filters them and cleans them. We learned that earlier. That's true. About 60% of your body is made up of water. Okay.

Like the, like earth, like the lakes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's, that's a great office quote, by the way. Right. Just, there is a small part of me that's excited about these changes, but 70% of me is water. Did we wrap this up? Yeah. Like done, done. Yeah. Like there's anywhere between 60,000 to 100,000 miles of blood vessels in the human body. Okay.

160,000 miles. It'd be enough to travel around the world more than three times. Yeah, that's crazy. It's crazy. Had they tried to do that, you think? Yeah. I don't know. I didn't Google it. They looked it up. Yeah, that was basically, right? I think that's about as good as I'm going to get. Yeah. Yeah, it ran its course. Yep. You know? This was like, I think this would be, if this episode is a human body,

This guy, you know, he died at like 43, 44. And it was, I don't think it was a surprise. People didn't even ask how he died. There you go. I've been waiting for this call for quite a while. According to your bio on the internet, this is your birthday, June 30th. Oh, today's the day? Yeah. So happy 43rd birthday. Thank you. Yeah. June 30th. Yeah. All right.

All right. That's it. Let's go, folks. Let's start doing that. We'll figure that out. Don't worry about the polls yet. It'll be in a few weeks. It's a propaganda. Think about it. Yeah. It's about to be. Think about it. Just think about it. That's all I'm asking. All right. See you all next week.

Thanks, everybody, for listening to the Nate Land podcast. Be sure to subscribe to our show on iTunes, Spotify, you know, wherever you listen to your podcasts. And please remember to leave us a rating on comedy. Nate Land is produced by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife, Laura, on the All Things Comedy Network. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovation Consulting in partnership with Center Street Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land podcast.