176: #176 Mythical Creatures (NOSO)
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Hey, y'all. I feel like y'all messed me up now these last two years. You're overthinking it now. Hello, folks, and hey, bear. Welcome to the Nate Land Podcast. I'm Brian Bates. Aaron Weber, Dusty Slay. All right. Yeah, I think y'all have messed it up. Yeah, it's our fault. I was doing fine. Aaron came in hot, and last week you messed it up, and I messed it up.

Welcome to the podcast, though. Glad you guys are here. Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving. We had a nice, fun one. What did we do? Oh, a golf. Sounds fun. Sounds fun. With the family or just... Me and my brother, me and Derek. Yeah. Yeah. Thanksgiving's a good day. Courses are closed, so it's like you can easily go out. And we went to our course, but you just walk around.

And it was nice. And so we went and played a few holes. A few more than we told my mom we were going to play. But yeah, it was fun. And yeah, it was nice here. I'm trying to think if I had something. I've been taking Holly. I was telling you guys I've been going on this trail near us and I was taking Holly. And I was thinking, dogs, they smell so hard at some spots.

As if they're like, this is the most important spot on earth. And it is to them. It is in that moment. And then you go, and I'll get lulled into it going like, well, let me let her have it. And then it's like, I finally go, that's enough. And I pull her. And then the next spot's like, well, I think I found it. And so then I've realized now as I've taken her these past few days, I'm like, we got to keep moving. Every spot's the greatest spot.

I'm not still giving a little. Yeah. It's a good tree. It's a good, like something's going on, but they, you know. Yeah, they get into it. They get into it. They really, I feel bad because if you're pulling, I don't want to just yank her. Yeah. But then you're just like, I'm not buying anything.

You know, this, you know, we hit a spot where you're like, I'm not buying this spot. Are the smells like their greatest sense? You think where they're like, oh, I got like a baby likes to pick things up and put it in their mouth. Like it's like their taste is their biggest thing. Yeah. Just like baby. You gotta let them do it. Let them learn on their own. Yeah. A little bit. Yeah. Yeah. Let them choke. Yeah. Swallow through Legos. They're going to figure it out. Yeah. And if they don't, you know, you try again next time. Yeah. Yeah.

Start laying them in their bed when they go to sleep. Yeah. They're, uh, yeah, I don't know. I think they're smelling, uh, Todd glass had a joke. Uh, once I heard said about like doors and dogs lick you cause they're licking the salt off of you.

And so he, and he, did you know that joke? No, but I think there's a lot of truth to that. And he said, he goes, you know, all right, the dog, the dog's looking at me because there's, there's always, he's looking at me because it's salt on me, but you know, I still pretend it's giving me kisses. And that really messed me up to be every time. I think if Holly looks here or something, you're like, do you even care? Oh yeah. Do you really care? Are you just, is it, is it all just that salt? I think it's all just something.

Yeah, but does Holly lick you on the face? Yeah, not much. But like, I mean, she would, but you'd have to, it's not like, but I mean, she gets very excited when we come home. So it's like jumping everywhere, but she's not licking us then really. She's not a big licker, but she will.

But I guess they're excited. Yeah. I mean, maybe if you really started breaking down a lot of things that dogs do, I mean, maybe it's not all about loving you, you know? Well, that's what I mean. Like, but you can't, when we come in, when you come in the door and they're so excited. But maybe they're just excited. They're like, yes, the people that take care of me have returned. Yeah. Or they're like, oh, that salt I like is back. The salt licks here. Yeah. Yeah. That's probably some truth to that. But look.

When my wife comes home, it's for the same reason. Yeah. Good. The lady who cooks and cleans, keeps me alive, is back. Yeah. It's like a super power, though, the way they can smell. You just be walking, and they'll just drag you 15 feet off the path to find a Dorito or something in the woods. It's amazing that dogs, I mean...

Bloodhounds, I think, can smell up to something like three miles away or something. Yeah, that's crazy. Yeah, so that thing you looked at there says, let them smell.

It says it provides mental stimulation and reduces stress for the dog. It's how they receive information about the world is through their nose. So they're just trying to soak up the world around them. Yeah. So underneath and I'm just like, come on now, get on. Yeah. But you don't, you know, you don't have all day out there. You can't. I'm out here to exercise, not to stand here while you reduce your stress. I've enjoyed it. It's fun to, I've enjoyed the, the,

It's fun to go out there with the dog and just the bond of you and the dog out there just, you know, alone. But, I mean, I was able to let her off the leash a little bit the other night because no one was out there. And I feel like she got some good sniffing in there. We have not been on this trail before, so it's new. You think a dog would remember a trail? I think so. Yeah, I mean, I would. I don't know. Yeah, that's the whole point is that they smell.

I think so. You think that trail has a truly unique scent such that the dog will remember it's been there before? Maybe not one time, but if you go a lot, you don't think a lot. Like, I mean, your dog knows where your house is. Yeah, yeah, you're right. You're right. And maybe that's all part of it. It's taken in these smells and it's all part of the tracking. Yeah. I mean, if you feed an animal, they will always come back.

Like a deer. Like if someone's like, you feed deer. Well, they take off running. They did not like, where was that house again? You know, where they go. What are you looking for? You remember the lady that was giving us all that food? I thought she was over in this. And the other deer is like, no, no, it's the next neighborhood. It is the next neighborhood over. That is right. All right.

When I was a kid, seeing a deer... Dogs are not alive. They're still wolves. Yeah, they weren't domesticated. Seeing a deer was like a big thing because they were a lot more rare. I...

I mean, a lot of wilderness to run through. Now there's just deer everywhere. The last two weekends driving to my gigs, just every mile interstate, there's just a dead deer on the side of the road. They're everywhere now. Clipped out here. Yeah. Cause we're bad day. Bad news baits would describe it as by dead deer and not alive deer. You could have also said you go drive through the neighborhood. I see just hundreds of deer running through neighborhood, but you, your marker for how many deer there is, is just the,

The amount that you see the bodies of deer. Just being honest here. Yeah. Do you think there are more deer or is it just a function of what Dusty said? There's less wilderness for them to run through. I guess both, but I think there's more. I think there's less wilderness. Well, that's definite. Where I live, it's like they're always bulldozing the woods to build some new development.

And so the deers are pushed out. I can agree with that. And I, but I also think you sure you weren't just a kid and it was exciting for you to see a deer.

Because you're a kid and y'all didn't have entertainment. I mean, I guess that could be true too. Look, in 1930, which is right around your era, the U.S. white-tailed deer population was about 300,000. Today, it's 30 million. So it's a little more. That's a 1,000-fold increase in less than 100 years. I've seen it. Yeah.

Well, yeah. So then I guess, yeah, you were right. You're right. It says down to about 300,000. Was that because of like over hunting back then? It was the Great Depression. I'm trying to think of what's going on. They just weren't. Yeah. They were not doing good. Couldn't get jobs and stuff. They were sad. The deer couldn't get jobs. Yeah. In the 1920s, the species was- Santa wasn't hiring. Yeah. It was just, you know.

There was over hunting. It was before government protection programs in the 1920s. So they were down to about 300,000. Yeah. So they're working their way back up. Yeah. I mean, they're going to have to. Too much. Yeah. Now it's like they're everywhere. They are everywhere. Also, fewer and fewer people are hunting. This is interesting. Really? Yeah. Hunting is less popular than it used to be. Because you go to the grocery store.

Yeah, for sure. And it's, yeah, when I was a kid, it was like everybody, it felt like everybody was being pushed to hunt. Yeah. We were never big hunters. Like no one in our family hunted. Yeah. No, not that. All my friends did, but we never did. Yeah. That was one that we didn't do. When I moved here to Tennessee, I was 17. And at the time, I don't know if this is still the case, but there was a curfew.

for how late I could be driving under 18 years old. I think it was like past 10 PM, maybe midnight, but there was an exception. If you were hunting, they would, they would let you drive. I remember it was like the first thing I learned. It's like a state law. Yeah. It's a state law, but you can stay out later if you're hunting or like you can walk

go earlier. It's like six, it's like midnight to 6 a.m. or something. Oh, I see. But if you need to get up early to hunt, you can get an exception. Oh yeah, you could go, because they have to leave at like three in the morning. Yeah, to get out there. Yeah. So you can't be out unless you have a gun. Is there a gun in here? Is there a rifle in here? And a few drinks in your cooler. You're good to go.

I'm sure there was a lot of people messing with that law. Oh, God. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm on my way to hunt. 1230 AM. He just came out of that bar, though, sir. Hunting for the ladies. Yeah. 16-year-old kid. Yeah.

Yeah. Would y'all have good things? No, no, no. It was pretty terrible. No, it was good. It was good. Just me. I believed you. You would have a terrible Thanksgiving. No, sorry. I regret that. It was just, you know, translating. I have to do a lot of translating for my wife with my family is they kind of speak different English dialects. I know about that.

Well, my uncle, I mean, he puts a dip in his mouth as soon as the last bite's made. At the table? I mean, he's got the spit cup ready to go. He finishes his drink and then becomes a spit cup. So that red solo cup is double duty. So my wife doesn't have a chance to understand him. So there's just a lot of translating going on. But it was good.

Yeah. I was there. Lucy got COVID. Oh, no. Wow. So our plans got canceled last minute. We're going to go to New York city, but we just stayed at home. Some friends brought us food. It was very nice. Oh yeah. Y'all were going to like 10 AM that next year. And then yes, you test positive that night. We're like, but it's all good now. It was good. It worked out well for you.

You didn't get to go to Lucy's family. It has nothing to do with her family. There is always a little bit of relief that like, I don't have to go to the airport tomorrow. Yeah. The day before Thanksgiving and Florida LaGuardia. You know what I mean? So there's a little bit of relief. Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm.

My Thanksgiving was good, but I came to this realization and this is no offense to my family, but as the old people die, it feels like the recipes die with them. So like my sister, you know, I went to my sister's house and she did a great job, but it's like, she doesn't fix a dressing like my grandmother or like my aunt. I had an aunt. My dad is much younger than his siblings. So his aunt, my aunt was like 90 years old and

And she died a couple of years ago and she made the best dressing.

Now the dressing's gone. We'll never have it again. No one has the recipe. So it's like each year as the older people die, so do all the good food. And maybe it's just my family. Hopefully there's some old people left and other people's family to keep it going. But well, you just keep writing. You write a recipe that just makes me sad. I don't write anything down. I don't think people are writing it down because they're just, you know, they just make it. They go, I'm going to make it. Yeah. Well, you should ask them and say, hey,

I think it's, you know, maybe Christmas. You got Thanksgiving. So when you go to Christmas, you go, you know, I was thinking,

Would you mind writing down the recipe for your, and then they go, why? I'd be like, I'd rather not say why. I think for my family, it's too late. I think we've already lost the oldest recipe. Well, thankfully it's just the dressing. It's like when the good stuff comes later. What else is there? I mean, dressing to me, dressing is, is Thanksgiving. I mean,

I mean, to me, that's- I don't like dressing. You don't like it? No. My wife calls it stuffing. Well, stuffing is different. Stuffing is not good. Dressing is a different thing. I don't, yeah. What is the difference? I couldn't tell you, but stuffing often comes in a box. It's Stouffer's stuffing and it's-

Dressing is a homemade dish where your aunt makes it and she has all the ingredients in it. And it doesn't look like whatever you just showed there. Yeah, see, that's stuffing. Dressing would be more of a flat top and baked and you cut it out almost like a- That's certainly not it. Yeah.

Yeah. And it's like, it just feels like it made me real sad this year. And my sister did a great job. It's no offense to her, but it's just not the same. My grandmother made a good dressing too. You're saying for your sister, if she listened to this, maybe don't worry about it next Thanksgiving. You got a year. You got a year to figure it out. And it just, wow.

It just made me sad. Yeah. Now, your wife has to be happy, though, Thanksgiving. It's the one holiday you honor, right? Yeah, yeah. So it's probably a big deal. Yeah, it is. It is a big deal, but it's like, I don't know. It just feels this year. Like, I had a great time. My sister hosted. I loved seeing the family. But, you know, it just felt like, I don't know. Maybe I just...

I hope they don't listen because they'll be so offended that I'm saying this, but it just feels like when the old people die, we lose the old food. And that's the real tragedy of it all. Yeah. Well, one of them, you know? It is. Here's how you're going to find out if they listen is when you go. Well, because there you see there's not one old person left that knows how to cook.

That had some kind of recipe you want? Well, and maybe it's just not that they don't know how to cook, but it's just like my aunt made them my favorite cookies and my favorite dressing. And now those are gone. Other people in the family have attempted the cookies, attempted the dressing, and they're good, but it's not the same.

Yeah. Do you think any of this is a sentimental attachment to the original cookies? Potentially. And also, as you get older, your palate's been expanded a little bit. Maybe you're a little more discerning than you used to be growing up in a trailer park in Alabama. I can't. Big words used for a trailer park guy. Yeah. Go ahead. Answer that question. I didn't understand even two seconds of what he was saying.

Well, my aunt wasn't a trailer park lady. You know what I mean? But you were. I'm saying you enjoyed it. Maybe you just enjoy it less than you used to. It's like knocking on a trailer park door trying to sell encyclopedias. You almost hit this trailer park real fast. And you see if you're going to get rid of any of them. Deep or discerning. Yeah.

You know, I don't know. I don't think so with the cookies or the dressing. Other things, I could agree. But I've had the dressing, you know, up until the last couple of years. You ever have something that you liked as a kid and then you get it as an adult and you're like, ugh. Why don't you make the dressing and cookies and take over? Because you like...

You're like garden and all that stuff. Yeah. So then you could be like, I'm going to do this and you get to take some time with the dressing. You know exactly what you want. But I, it's like, I know it when I taste it, but I have no idea what was going on. Yeah. With the making of it. But I mean, what if your wife made it and then you just,

I think she would like this, be over her shoulder and criticize her. Yeah, yeah. As she makes it. That's a good idea. Yeah. But my aunt's dressing, though, I mean, it would be, I mean, it would get tore up. I know. Keep saying that to your wife as she keeps trying to make the slave family happy. Every dish she brings to you, you go, my aunt's dressing is just...

It's different than what you're, and maybe, you know, then you can bring in probably some Canada stuff. Yeah. Maybe you're not, because you're not from this country. Yeah. And you could, you know. That's a good idea. I like that. Do y'all do Canadian Thanksgiving too? No. But my wife. Is that a triangle day? Yeah.

Is there a Canadian Thanksgiving? There is, yeah. Boxing Day. I was thinking Boxing Day. So it's like Triangle Day. I didn't get the Triangle Day reference, but now I do. I don't know if I got it. I just said it because- No, it's a good joke. Good joke in the 80s. It's still relevant now. But she made real cranberry sauce. Instead of out of the can, she took cranberries and cooked it and made a homemade cranberry sauce. Very good.

I think my mom's cooking would still meet your criteria. I bet so. So maybe next year you should come to our house for Thanksgiving. Oh, you should try some dressing there. Then maybe you could get, you know. Yeah, get your mom to write down the recipe. Yeah. Get some Bates put in you. Yeah. Mm-hmm. I mean, it's surprising to say this. This is a little more mainstream. The Bates family, a little more mainstream than the Slade family. Yeah. Well, I would. They were. They had a house and stuff. Yeah. Yeah. But I would like to.

Yeah, I'd like to go get some of that dressing. Oh, there we go. So your mom is in like a casserole dish. Oh, yeah. I know exactly what you're talking about. I mean, every church potluck, that's the way it is. That's a good dressing. Yeah. My aunt, yeah, she made the best cookies and the best dressing. And that's who we named our daughter after. Our daughter has the middle name of my aunt. Oh. Yeah.

Because of that. Our daughter's name is Cookies Dressing. And Cookies Dressing slash. Your daughter, she's like, can I live up to this? You go, I don't know. Try that dressing. Yeah. It's not.

Now, were you there when the Iron Bowl was taking place? No, no. I was back home watching it. Okay. Alone. And so my wife will not watch football with me. And I like watching football alone because I like to watch it. I was going to say, increasingly, that's my...

go-to way to watch a football game I truly care about. Yeah. I want to sit alone, hotel room, like right in front of the TV and just watch it. I'd like to watch with one other person that also cares about the game. That way we can cheer with each other. At the same level though. Yes.

But I don't like going to Buffalo Wild Ways or something like that. Like, I'm kind of over that. To watch a game I care about. It's fun to just have the games on when it's whatever. But, like, I want to sit down, zero in on the Iron Bowl. Yeah. You know, in a dark room. That game was fun. Yeah. Heartbreaking if you're an Auburn fan. Your mom was probably pretty upset. She was at the game. And, yeah, I bet she was. Oh, gosh. Yeah. That's crazy. Yeah. Yeah. What a game. Ten years.

From the kick six. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's actually the greatest thing about the heartbreak because 10 years ago, very heartbreaking for Alabama. And they were mocked about it for years and years and years. Well, it's got to be tough for Alabama because it's like Alabama. I mean, not saying anything about Auburn, but Auburn was six and five. So it's like if it's going to happen, it's not in the world that happened. Yeah. And you're made just six and six.

But it would have been, I know they would like to stick it to Alabama. Oh, yeah. I have no sympathy for them. I just want to say that. A lot of family that are Auburn fans, and Auburn was pretty good for a while, and they didn't handle it with the most grace. When they were good. Like Alabama does. Yeah, they're getting borderline arrogant about everything. The Alabama fan, what's the worst thing Alabama fans will say about Auburn? You guys stink at football. Yeah.

but Auburn fans, they think Alabama, they're dumb. You know, they're like the worst part of Alabama. They cheat there. What? I mean, they throw the book at them. So they do love to throw out the cheat and Alabama cheats. Of course. They love to throw out the Alabama cheats line. That's the best thing about, uh,

people getting paid in college now is that they no longer will just say, they go, well, that's what Nick Saban's been doing for years. Yeah. And then Auburn, meanwhile, they're only good player in 40 years. They bought, they bought from a Juco team. But I do got a lot of, uh, Auburn fan friends. So I don't want to go too, too far down that. I'm trying to cut those people out of my life. Oh no. I'm trying to drop this dead weight. I'm just kidding. My mom went to Auburn.

I still like Auburn. I'm still an Auburn fan. I'm an Auburn fan as well. I can go, I can do both. Yeah. I was like, I wanted Alabama to win, but it was a heartbreaking loss. I was like, that's not how I wanted this game to go down. Yeah. I told it. I was like, when we were watching it, I was saying 40 seconds left.

If you said the final scores would be 33 to 24, you could not. I mean, you're like, well, that's impossible. They took that off though. Huh? They took that last. Oh, they did. Yeah. Wow. Uh, I think it was, I think time had already expired before even that last snap. Really? Yeah. I, uh, I saw somebody post about later, like what happened to that last pick six and, uh,

Were there gambling implications with that last touchdown? No, I looked. It didn't affect the – okay. So it – I think it ended up 27-24. So you didn't step out of bounds or something? I didn't even take the time to look to see why –

But I did look up the score, and they did take it off. Yeah. But I think the play clock was already – or the game clock was already at zero maybe when he snapped. I just want to state, though, before we move on, that I don't agree with a lot of things Aaron said. And I have tons of Auburn family and friends, and I don't want to get killed when I go home. And I –

I don't agree with a lot of what Aaron has said so far on this podcast in regards to Auburn. Y'all should hear how he trashes Auburn off mic. War Eagle is all I'll say. Oh, my God. You coward. I just want that to be stated here. I say a lot of crazy things, but I can't make those kind of statements. He might need, when he goes home, a solo stove. Oh, man. How about that? Have you heard the news, Brian? What? Recently, the West Coast—

legend himself, Snoop Dogg, announced that he's done with smoke. It's over. He's eliminating it. How could it be, you might ask, that the dog father is giving it up? Well, we've now learned, as it turns out, that he is going smokeless. Joining forces with the makers of the world's most popular smokeless fire pits are old pals at Solo Stove. It might have been. I'll look it up. Yeah, Drew Holcomb. Maybe I'm wrong. I don't know.

All right. So we'll start with you guys. We'll get to your comments, get into a little bit sooner. That's good. I don't know about that. People are very happy about that. I don't know. On the back end, they're not going to be happy. They're like, they're still talking about this.

The back end? Well, you know, they prefer we get into the topic and have 20 minutes left in the show. Oh, well, we'll be again. Daniel Sims, with your bits on Aaron's outhouse, the heated toilet seat guy, and their tornado flush earthquake.

In the bathrooms episode, you guys have officially delivered the funniest thing I've ever heard. Pure genius and much appreciated. You guys are not making enough money. All right. There we go. Well, you don't know how much money I make, Daniel. Yeah. So just stay out of it. That's true. That is true. I'm killing it. Yeah. Thank you, Daniel. As soon as it's not enough. Nate was skeptical about bathrooms going in. We could turn it around. So many compliments. And then the guy at the end goes, man, you're all broke. Yeah. Uh, uh,

I think he's, I don't think y'all read that. I'm joking. He's being nice. I'm just piggybacking off Brian. Yeah. Yeah. I just make sure y'all. Yeah. I don't know what y'all are talking about. I just wanted to stay out of my finances. Yeah. Yeah. I'm just piggybacking here. Yeah. I was on board with it. Brian took it at a negative place. I was like, I'll get in there too, man. Yes. And yeah, I'm an improv guy. That's right. Uh,

What is this guy, Alabama fan? Is that what you, Dusty, quote? Hey, I can go either way. You guys are not making enough money. That's what Dusty thinks about the Alabama fans. No, he hates Auburn. Auburn. You think that the, Auburn does feel like it's more of a, isn't that like a. It's an agricultural school. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, but it's, yeah. That's not what they would say.

Yeah, but is Notre Dame not obnoxious with Notre Dame? Of course. Oh, of course. Yeah. Yeah, we're very arrogant. Yeah. We just have a reason to be. Yeah, because y'all did good 100 years ago. We're just a good school, and we have a history of being good. For 100 years ago. Well, the last championship was 1988. Quite a while. I mean, look, it's been a while. For someone being such a good school, you would think –

And then basketball, no one's talking about. Y'all have made some appearances somewhere. We'll hop in the Elite Eight every now and then, kind of dip our toes in. Yeah, yeah. The women's soccer has won a few national championships. Yeah, yeah. So what's the arrogance come from, you think? Because you're on TV everywhere? Like you're the Cubs? Like you're on WGN? We're a national brand in a way that few...

few colleges are. Were the first college, were y'all the first college or were the first to play nationally to really play around the country? Because Michigan boxed us out. Yeah. Michigan hated Catholics. So they said, you can't play with our, in our conference. You can't play with us. So we had to travel to California and play USC. And that's how we became a national brand. Hmm. You know, so you owe a lot to Michigan, you would say.

Well, I would never phrase it that way, but I guess so. In a roundabout way, I should think. No, I mean, when Vandy started 2-0, we were pretty cocky. Yeah, but we're allowed to be because we...

Cause you're never been. Yeah. Then we finished two and two. I looked up the Vandy cause yeah, it's been tough. And then it's like, you keep like, we don't recruit cause it's always like, well, we're, you know, it's a really good college. And you look at the ranking of Vanderbilt's college. You're not, we're not number one. You're like, you want to be like, at least be number one college. Yeah.

You know, and then we could be like, all right, well, we're, they're like 18, 19. Like, it's just not even. That's what Notre Dame is right around that. Yeah. Right around there. Stanford's way above both of us. Yeah. So it's like, it's just pick one.

Just either like either be a good school or have a good football program. Yeah. Pick one. Just yeah. You can't do both. Can't do both. Just do it. I want to do a dusty sleigh style backtrack here and just say I'm not actually that arrogant about Notre Dame stuff. I don't want any of that to have been misinterpreted. Well, college football sensitive. You got to be careful. You know, it is.

It is. Uh, Paul Sheldon. I'm sorry. Tolitz was a home run. Very funny topic. What do Nate and crew think about bathroom attendance? I don't know. I'm a hundred percent. Check our after hours. We're going to talk about the bathroom attendance on the Patreon. Uh,

Yeah, I'm not for it. I'm not for it at all. It's crazy that that still is even a thing. I get the idea of it. I wouldn't mind it if it wasn't the obligation of the tipping in there. That's the only thing that keeps you from wanting it. If there's a guy standing there and handed you and it could be a nice experience, but then you're like, I got to go grab. I'll try to do it. It's almost like when you walk in, you're just like, I need to go and just put it in here because I'm going to have to.

You know, you got to have to wash your hands and go get your money. And then, you know, what if they had their Venmo listed? Yeah. That it's just getting too easy. You know, the tipping's out of, out of control. And so it would be like, if you want to have that, have it be like some like restaurant that's like, we're going to pay you.

$400, $300 a night, $200 a night. No tips. You're in there. That's your... Let it be known. You don't have to tip this guy. He's been taken care of. Don't harass the patrons. But you can't even say you don't have to tip this guy. It's a do not tip. You're not allowed to tip this guy. Tips not accepted. There's golf places. There's golf courses that you go to some. They're not allowed to accept a tip. Wow. And they go, we can't accept it. But they do, right? I think you have to...

If any of them, you'd have to really push it on them and quietly do it. You'd have to go, I'm leaving this here. You know what I mean? Yeah. So you do what you want with it. But it's very nice. Go here, throw this away from me. Yeah. And if you're visiting the course, you might be like, all right, I'll do that. But it's very nice to just kind of be like, you go to a place and they're like, we don't allow that. So just come in here, you...

do, you know, all your stuff. Like, I was thinking that you go eat at, like, uh...

You know, if you go, you always see it on TV or movies or something like someone's at a restaurant and they're, it's just, they got a running tab at that. Like, I always liked that. Yeah. Like you go somewhere so much, they just have your credit card or they have your whatever. And then you just kind of like paint it, I guess, as you go. Like, but it's a very cool, like that always looked cool. And like seeing a movie. Have you ever been a regular somewhere?

Like at a restaurant or a bar where you walk in and the staff knows you? No. You ever been like a norm from Cheers? Doesn't that seem fun to do? Oh, I always thought it was fun. I always thought it was that you would see when, because I worked in restaurants, so you would see regulars that come in there every day. And you did. I did like them. Yeah. Like you're always like, oh, that is fun. I've definitely been a regular at a bar.

Charleston? Yeah. But it's like, it was never the norm experience. Yeah. You know? Yeah. There's a place we used to- You're getting thrown out of there every now and then. Yeah. Anything but norm. Yeah. Regularly thrown out of this place. Oh gosh, here we go. Yeah.

The whole town knew Dusty. They go, we get Dusty early, so it's pretty fun. And they go, we're like one of his last stops. We're the ones that have to send him home. Well, there definitely was those. There's ones that you go to early and ones you go to last. Right. Yeah, that's for sure. But there have been a few since I started comedy regulars at Zany's, the comedy club, and they're the best. There was Lee who passed away. Remember Lee? She was the best. She was great. She would sit in that same seat every show. I remember she would –

She would meet young comics. My first time performing there, she'd get everybody's autograph. She passed away? Yeah, she did. Yeah, a few years ago. She was the first you feel like I have a fan. Then there was Brian Bachner. Bachner moved to Charlotte. He's coming to see me this week. I'm going to see him when I go to Charlotte. I still talk to Bachner. He's the best. Yeah, he is awesome.

I love that. Yeah. They have Chelsea there now. Yeah, yeah. She's great. Her and her mom are awesome. Yeah, it is fun. It's being regular somewhere. But yeah, going to a restaurant, they just kind of, if you had a place, I could see it where you could, I could see the joy of it. Be like, I want this back table. I go in there and I eat. Or if I die, they put a little placard on this chair.

That's what I want. Yeah. Aaron Weber sat here. Yeah. This is a different chair. It's barely hanging. If you had a chair, if you had your own chair at a restaurant, you would get enormous. We could tell which chair. Yeah. I mean, yeah. The fact you've stayed in good shape is because you don't have your own chair at a restaurant. If you, we will know.

That Aaron is off the road. He's not traveling no more. He's local. We have to go do the podcast around him at the restaurant. Elliot DeLuca.

DeLuca. That's a fun last name. Elliot DeLuca. That's a fun, that's an easy, like, unless I'm saying it wrong, DeLucia or something. DeLuca. I'm feeling the DeLuca thing. Oh, yeah. Crazy to have Elliot be the first name.

Because that seems very, Elliot and DeLuca don't feel like they, they feel like you would introduce those two people and just think they would never meet each other ever again. Different cultures. You go, hello, this is Elliot. This is DeLuca. Y'all can meet. Y'all have nothing in common and you'll go your separate ways. But you're very, very nice. I like the first name DeLuca. This is Elliot. This is DeLuca. Yeah. This is, that translates the Luca. Yeah.

And DeLuca goes, do you want to dance? The Luca. Elliot the Luca. What's Luca? Day would be of, right? Of Luca. Elliot of Luca. I got the most simple word there is. I got it wrong. Elliot of night. That's what it feels like. Is Luca night? I knew a guy named Elliot night. Oh. Luca is a given name predominantly for males. That's the first name.

You got to look at the surname. My name is Luca. Sacred wood. Yeah. It's nighttime. Wow. Uh, uh, after two hours and 11 minutes in a podcast about toilets, I don't think I've heard toilet pronounced correctly. It's,

Typical DeLuca. This is probably Elliot talking. Yeah. It's toilet, folks. What do we say? Toilet. Toilet. Toilet. Toilet. Toilet. Toilet. Toilet. Who says toilet? Toilet. I say toilet. I want to object to the let part of it because I think it's toilet. That's how I say it. Toilet. Toilet. Toilet. Toilet. Toilet sounds crazy to me. It sounds like you're saying too much. I never liked the word toilet.

Nah, I don't like it either. I just like to go to the bathroom. Like John? What do you think about John? No, that's... Come on. I mean... Come on. No. My mom says come on. Yeah. You just say you're going to go to the bathroom and then you leave it. My grandpa said pot. Yeah. That's what he said. If you're around a construction site, I understand it's going to be called a few different things. I can handle some, you know. But overall, you're like, I'm just going to the bathroom. Just, you know.

I never was like, oh, do you need it? Where's your toilet at? That seems insane to say. It's in the bathroom. That is. Yeah. Yeah. You want to know where the bathroom's at? Toilet's in there. Chase Peeler. I have bidet seats that cost me a couple hundred bucks. They raise and lower the seat automatically and also warm the seat for you. I promise you the bidet and heated seats are life changing.

Get one for Christmas. I don't understand his obsession with having the seat warm. There's zero appeal for that for me. I'd rather, I want to cool it down a bit. Yeah. I mean, the guy that wants to walk in cooler at his house. Yeah. I'm sorry. He understands.

The man that runs hot. Yours has air-conditioned seating? Yeah, dude. That's what I want. Just blows up. Like a truck driver that's like... I want it like an air hockey table. That's what I want it to feel like. I go in there to cool off.

The heated seat does feel like a bit much. And who wants your bathroom experience at home to be that good? I mean, that ruins every, especially if you travel a lot. Like, I don't need it to be that good at home to where I'm like, when I get out in the world, everything seems so much less good. By that logic, should you go out of your way to make your house worse so that you enjoy traveling more? Well, I don't want to make it worse, but I just kind of,

I said that before I thought about it. But no, but you know what I mean? That could have been the next thing that he said. It could have been. But you know what I mean though? Like this, it raises and lowers for you. You got a bidet, the seat's warm. It's like, it seems like too much. I don't mean I want at home to have a portable.

a potty. Right. When I go to a hotel. But your bathrooms at home should be that where you kick the flusher. Yeah. So you don't have the tank. Tankless. Tankless. But you're saying if you have too much luxury at home,

It's hard to leave. Yeah. It's hard to leave. You're too much of a homebody. Yeah. And there's a danger in that for sure. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, who knows what Dusty would get into if he never left the house. Oh, that's true. Don't ever let me make too much money. That's for sure. I won't ever leave. Yeah. But then that defeats the purpose of how you would make the money.

Well, if I've made enough to where I'm all set, there's no need to make more. Let's build an orchard and let's get into it. Dusty Slay's Orchard. Yeah. Cat Rockwell. That's a good name. Cat Rockwell feels like it's the one in the family, the Rockwell that's not in the family business.

the Rockwell business. The black sheep. Yeah. But the fun one, the one that everybody knows. Yeah. They named her Catherine and she shortened it to Cat. You know, Cat Rockwell. Yeah. Everybody knows Cat. Everybody knows Cat. Cat's the best. But, you know, but she's, you know, do you think she can get to talk to her dad? You're like, Cat hasn't talked to her dad in years. There you go. But they're estranged. But they get back together. But Cat is the one that brings everybody back together too. Awesome. She's fun. She's fun.

I was a restaurant manager for 12 years. Exactly. Worked in a restaurant. She's a regular at some bars. Right, right. The company I worked for had required sanitation training where hand washing was a big deal. Unlike sanitizer alone, the running water rinses substances off your hand. This is especially important because 9 out of 10 people suffer from TPT, toilet...

Oh, yeah. That's toilet paper poke through. That's tough. And unknowingly have 10 people. Yeah. That seems like. Yeah. I don't know how you even. Cause I'm the one of 10 that doesn't suffer from that. Yeah. And unknown. They have unwanted substances on their hands. I mean, I never have toilet paper poke through. Well, you just don't know it. You're one of those. I'm knowing. Yeah.

How do you not know that your stuff's not poking through the toilet paper? I don't know. I don't think we should be talking about this. What I'm just saying. Should we be talking about this? Should we be talking about this? Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. But yeah, that makes a lot of sense.

I don't know how you get that poll, but I am for washing your hands over hand sanitizer. I think both are overrated a bit, but I do. I am for washing over sanitizer. Yeah. Your day is full of to do's responsibilities and balancing work with spending quality time with loved ones while finding time for yourself with everything you have on your plate. Earning your degree online seems impossible.

But at Grand Canyon University, they specialize in helping you fit your bachelor's, master's, or doctoral degree into your busy day. GCU is an affordable private Christian university based in beautiful Phoenix, Arizona. Been there a bunch. That sounds like a word I haven't even heard. Contradictory. Contradictory. In this case. Well, I'm not going to argue with Bluey.

Who knows? But I got my information from the internet and Crocodile Dundee. When he goes to New York and he checks into the nice hotel, he goes, there's two Dunnies in here. And she's like, no, one Dunnie, one bidet. Oh, okay. What a great movie. Yeah. That was probably when you could use that joke. And that was. Oh yeah. That was an edgy, fun joke. Yeah. That was a fun. Yeah. You couldn't, now you can, you know,

Feels like it's been done. It's been done-y. Bluey's a big thing, huh? Bluey's great. I thought Bluey, I'm not going to lie to you, I just typed in Bluey. I'm looking at pictures. I thought Bluey was Blue's Clues. Yeah, I can see that. I think I most, I don't know if I watched, saw Bluey. I don't think Harper was into Bluey. It's come along, I think. This looks recent.

Started in 2018. Yeah, yeah. So that was a couple years. Yeah, yeah. We already, I think, moved on. You just missed it. Yeah, just missed it. Sarah Harward. Harward. Sounds like, I want to say Hayward for some reason, but it's Harward. That's a Harward. Yeah. Like you go Sarah, she goes Sarah Harward. Yeah.

Do you write these ahead of time? Do you write these quips while you're putting these comments together? That was pretty good. Yeah, he thought that two weeks ago. I've been saving this one. When I was in college, I cleaned the buildings on campus to pay my way through school. Oh, good one. I did not expect that coming from Sarah Harwood. We replaced the toilet paper the least in the very first stall closest to the door.

The stall was generally the cleanest and obviously the least used. For the past 20 years now, I'll always go to the first stall. It's the least used and almost always has toilet paper. There you go. That is solid. You know, that's like something that is like something you take on. She took that in college. Right. You know, now. And that's more important than anything she learned in college, I bet. I bet she's the only thing she's still using. Yeah.

Kim Cottrell Cottrell probably Cottrell Cottrell the actress it looks like that Kim Cottrell I think hers is the CA yeah oh yeah could be her yeah it could be her she just goes by Cottrell that looks like a lady that probably into this podcast she ever watched the show yeah I guess

My uncle worked for a sewer plant. Yeah, that's her. My uncle worked for a sewer plant. He found a driver's license in the screen catcher, cleaned it and mailed it back to its owner. Wow. That's very nice. That's probably got to, you got to be like, I don't know if I want this.

But maybe the person didn't know. Maybe they did because it would have, I guess they would. They're like, what? I flushed this down the toilet. Yeah. Oh my God. Who is messing with me? This thing's haunted and I try to get rid of it. Yeah, that would be that. We'd love to see if we can talk to that driver's license owner. That's like, dude, I've been wondering how.

It's a murder victim. The guy who did it flushed it and then shows back up. Good night. Gotta get some edge in this podcast. Yeah. Richard Garcia. I really think I would rather be asked, how has your year been going? Question far better than some. How's your day? I really dislike small talk, but inquiring about my year would actually cause some good reflection. I agree.

Well, you agree because you've had the best year in the history of the world. No, it doesn't. It's not about that. You're tempting people. You're like, hey, how's your year been? Well, my mom had cancer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But have you heard of a little show called Saturday Night Live? But you should be excited because you're this close to someone that's having the greatest year of all time. I am excited. I'm joking. I'm joking. I got to go to Saturday Night Live because of you.

No, I'm not talking about just me. I'm saying in general that I think it's a better...

You know, I look when you're not trying to have a long talk, then, you know, but if you're like, how's your year been going? It's like, you know, it's not bad. I think in a rough start off to, you know, it's, it's, you're actually getting more in detail than the other way. In January, this is the cheesiest question of all. In January, it sounds like you're making a lame joke. A lame joke. How's your year been? You say, how did last year go for you? Okay. Is this year, you say, hey, how's this year looking? You got a lot of good plans this year.

Oh, you look forward. What's your year going to look like? What do you think your year's going to look like? Yeah, we got a vacation. We got all this. So I'm excited. It's got to be more positive. What month do you flip it? March. March. How's your... Yeah, I can see that. But your new year doesn't start till April. Probably spring. So you go, how's the year going so far? Well, we got past the toughest part, winter. And now we're in it. Yeah. Looking forward to some...

Some planting. Some planting. Some made flowers. Yeah. Yeah. How's the garden coming? Yeah. How's your orchard? Taking it day by day and then walk away. Yeah. That's fine. You're going to shut that down. Taking it day by day. Fun guy right there. Rachel Bergeson. Dusty, unless you want to be awoken by what sounds like world's loudest and weirdest meow every day, you do not want peacocks.

My parents live in a rural area and the neighbors that are a good five minute

walk away have peacocks and they are so loud it sounds like they're right outside my window i got a few messages about not wanting peacocks i i am there is no danger that i'm going to be getting peacocks yeah i don't there's a lot of exotic animals that i like and things that i'm into but peacocks are not one of them yeah are you allowed to own a peacock that feels illegal yeah you see them

I see him at a zoo. You see him out in people's yards? You do? Yeah. A peacock? I've seen him in Florida. I think I've seen him here. Yeah. Man, I don't know. Where are peacocks at? I don't think I've ever seen a peacock. I think I've seen a peacock. I've seen a peacock in Florida in the wild. I think I've seen one here.

in people's yards. This person says they have peacocks. That guy wasn't supposed to have it wherever you saw it. Literally, this person... There's so many people that have owned peacocks that they have opinions about owning peacocks. And we're acting like no one... Like it's crazy that...

Yeah, but it's not as common as a dog. That's what I'm saying. I mean, what are we even doing here? We go, I'm just done, but I've seen it. Yeah. Oh, you saw a peafowl. A peafowl. What is that? I like that this paragraph has California listed as if it's a different country. It is. Various countries, including California, and then it ends with North America, which is also not a.

Maybe he is a peafowl. I mean, that's just peafowl. I don't know the difference. Where do peacocks, where do they originate? Where are they at? Where's the bulk of them? If I want to go see some good wild peacocks. Yeah. Yeah, I think peafowl is the bird. Peacock is the male and peahen is the female. Wild peacocks are primarily found in India, Pakistan, Sri Lanka, and Java, Myanmar. That's what makes it so interesting how many I've seen. Yeah. He's seen the tame ones.

I've seen them. Maybe it's not a, I've seen them. I don't know where they're at. I've seen them too. And I, but yeah, I mean, there's no danger that I'm going to be stocking up the backyard with peepholes. Did it have colors?

Yeah, was it plumed up? You may have just seen a turkey. Look, I'll give you some of them were turkeys, but I've still seen. So they're walking around. I do appreciate the heads up, though, but I'm not going to be getting any. That's good. I know we're still talking about you. It was addressed to me from Rachel Bergensen. It was. Bergensen.

Did you put up the bat house? I did put up the bat house. Yeah. Okay. It sounds like you're, Rachel Bergen sounds like, you know, your daughter in 25 years. My parents live in a rural area and the neighbors that are a good five minute walk away, but you're the neighbor that's a good five minute walk away. They have peacocks.

Well, yeah. I mean, by the time my daughter's old enough to write into this podcast, I may have some pee. I mean, you know what I mean? But right now we're far away from it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Paul Rimpel. Rimpel. Rimpel. Paul Rimpel.

That was a good name. Regarding Aaron and the Canadian accent, what would you think if someone said he has a real American accent? Does Aaron have trouble understanding Miss Slate? The vast majority of people born in Canada speak the way she does. Ooh. Um,

Does he mean your wife? I'm thinking so. Yeah, I can understand her fine. But she does have an accent. You can hear an accent. Hannah's family. You tell her when you go, there you go. Tell her to write it down. Dusty, what is she saying? Dusty, could you get your old lady over here and tell her to write it down? I can't. I have a headache trying to understand what she's over here saying. Speak English. Her.

uncles and stuff. They're much more Canadian, but yeah, it's still very, what is the, it's very understandable. What's that? Yeah, that works. Yeah, understandable. Yeah. Yeah. And it's like intelligible. Decipherable. Yeah. No, it's not. No, what's that word? That's what I think you're thinking of. What is it? Intelligible? Yeah. Is that a word? Sure. Yeah, it is. Oh, yeah. Isn't that? I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. That means you understand it.

Yeah. Like when someone speaks, you understand what they're saying. Right. Understandable seems like you're, they're like doing something. I get why they're doing it. Yeah. Understandable. What do you say when you write it? Legible. Legible. A verbal legible. Yes. Yeah. I'm thinking legible. Yeah. She speaks legibly. That's what we're saying. Yeah. But I think the answer is, look, in the same way that there is a prototypical American accent,

There is a Canadian one. Like, you all can hear what I'm talking about. I don't. But I think he's implying it's a big country, so people up in New York are some different than here. Not everybody is exactly like you. There's other people in the world, is what I think Paul's saying. Oh, I thought you were breaking the news to me just now. No, no. I think Paul's trying to remind you, like, Aaron, the world doesn't... I know you're Notre Dame. Yeah.

So you, like Notre Dame alum, think, well, there's no one outside of ourselves. Right, right, right. Yeah. And he's saying they have college in Canada, too.

Not good ones. I'm kidding. They have good colleges. What kind of colleges do they have up there? McGill University. What do they do there? University of Toronto. Learn how to move to America. Learn how to get a visa. Stuff like that, folks. I want to say real quick. I watched a video of people in Ireland. They're going up to people in Ireland going, do your best American accent. It's fascinating to hear what people think.

It's all just a Southern accent. That's what they do. That's what they think of an American accent is just a Southern one. So that's, that's what, when I say Canadian accent, that's what I mean. Cause the Southern accent is the best. Let's be honest. It is the best. It's super fun. Uh, Jordan Lenny. I mean, this whole podcast is based on hoping these people think Southern accent is the best. Jordan Lanier. We need a dusty versus Nate swimming race.

Both have claimed to be fast swimmers. Let's see it happen. Bologna, Bologna, Bologna, Bologna, Bologna. Yeah. That's how you say. Isn't that wild? That's how you spell it. Bologna with an A at the end. Bologna can be the, Bologna can be the ref. It would be perfect.

I don't know how this has turned into a me versus you swimming competition. I'm down. Well, I'll do it. But I don't know how that proves that either of us are fast swimmers. Yeah, that would be – we can figure something out. I still – I know – I still like the idea of trying to see if we could one day shoot something, see if people could pick, you know, really like how do we shoot this to show a team out there.

and be like, you got to try to blend in. Yeah. It's Dusty versus Nate. Brian's the ref. I guess I'll sit this one out. There you go. I just can't understand. You do a cannonball. That's what starts us off. It's like the starter gun. I'll just never understand why it is more unrealistic that I could blend in with a swimming team than Brian of the professional soccer team. Look, Dusty, this really upsets you, but the people have spoken.

I just don't understand. There's an objective physical difference. That's what I'll say. Anyway. But not with Brian and a professional soccer player? Less so, for sure. Let's pull up David Beckham here. Brian is closer to David Beckham than you are to Michael Phelps. I don't think so. Michael Phelps is like 6'5". I don't think so. You're 3'6". I still disagree.

I don't think it. Yeah, I mean, yeah, I mean, come on. Yeah, dude. Let's pull up David Beckham. You know, I don't know if you do you really need a ref for a swimming race? Yeah, it's down there. Yeah. What's the ref going to do? So this guy, this guy is this is what Brian looks like. Yeah.

Well, they're going to be wearing a jersey. Well, they're not asking. And you can't wear a jersey in the pool. Yeah, that's the thing. But if you wore that long, he's got long-sleeving shorts on. Yeah. And we're saying from a far view away that you would just be like, oh. That could be Brian.

I just think that soccer players are the most in shape players in the world. You don't think swimmers are in pretty good shape? Swimmers might be the most in shape. And swimming, you got to take your shirt off. Michael Phelps was eating 30,000 calories a day at his peak. And you have to take your shirt off. We're talking about the world's greatest swimmer. Yeah, but you just talked about David Beckham. He's one of the best of all time. Is he the best though? Top 10 all time. You can't even name 10 swimmers.

Michael Phelps, Ryan Lochte. You can't even name 10. No, no, that's fine. Katie Ledecky? Yeah. You can't. You can't. But I would say you're going to have to get to number...

Of the top, I don't know, probably number like 5,000 before you see a belly on one of these guys. Like, so that's what I mean. Soccer players too, though. Such a funny way of putting it. I know, but soccer players, you have a shirt on, so you're just trying to blend in for a second. Oh, for a second? Now that's all it is? No, it's for the whole. I would say the whole game. The whole game. Oh, we got to see the whole game. Okay. Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, I'm going to get out it. I admit that, but just maybe before, I mean, yeah, I just want you guys, you, you, you, you, you want you to choose a short, uh,

sport that you got to take your shirt off. Yeah, but this is again, I think five. Wait, is that dusty or is that Michael Phelps? He's number one. Number one in the world. Not even other swimmers don't come close to this guy. I mean, with all let's do Mark Spitz in all full honesty. I think if you went and went on the women's team, you could fit in there.

He's made that argument many times. Yeah. But I think it would make more sense in the current time that we live in, if you were on a women's team, I would be like, okay.

Okay. I think you would be very hard. Again, my point is. Does that not make sense? Picture Dusty going, they go, here we go. Another swimmer on the women's team. And you'd be like, okay. Like, you know, he's swimming with the women now. And you'd be like, okay. I just can't understand why there's not more emphasis on the idea that

That Brian is going to blend in with the greatest athletes in the world. I'll tell you why, because it's funny how defensive you're getting. It's just insane to me. It's because he has clothes on. I would probably wear a turtleneck. He wears a big shirt and stuff. You have to take all that stuff off. So your best bet is to wear a woman's shirt.

Let's see some other swimmers. Someone said this is Mark Spitz. He was the former Olympic. What's a woman's bathing suit look like? You're going down the wrong road. And you can leave the beard. And that's okay.

And, you know, look, you need that. You need to be covered up a little bit. I mean, come on, Dusty, that you could do that. I would believe that all day long. Just the overalls, full on. Like, we can't tell. Like, does that one have a belly? We don't know for sure. I'll wear it if you wear it. I'll wear it. Yeah. If you wear it, I'm in. Yeah. But I'm saying if you blend it in, if you go over one. Yeah.

Yeah, over here. I mean, I know this is... I need some... I'm not trying to be political, but that's... Everybody knows what I'm talking about. And if Dusty went that route... I need more rational people. You're going to be the same size as the other women. You're the same height to them, probably. You got them by weight a little bit. And then...

But maybe not because they're probably strong. And so if a body bounces out- I just think that we're judging off the world's best swimmer

versus some average swimmers. Somebody sent us a fat swimmer. It was for some small country. Could you Google? Fat swimmer? Or I don't know if he was... He wasn't really fat. In the Olympics? Come on, guys. There he is right there. Oh, man. This guy is... Ethiopian. Yeah. I mean, that could be dusty. Kill for that body. That could be dusty. Yeah, I mean, I look better than this guy. Yeah. So... That's what I'm saying. I would kill for that body too. But I'm just saying...

I'm trying to help Dusty out here. Yeah. Yeah, I just think you guys... You called him the whale? That's so mean. Ethiopian swimmer dubbed Rebel the whale. That shows the standards. The person that wrote that probably is bigger than me. Yeah, well, that's... But this guy, Michael Phelps, is like a phenom. And that's who I got to be compared to. I'm saying...

this thing has gone way too far. I'm down for the challenge though. Now I have to race you just to race everyone here and play soccer against everyone. We can race. What are you going to do? Olympic size pool? Yes. You're going to go lane all the way down, freestyle, whatever you want. Just all the way down, not all the way back. Just down, not back. Just down. All right.

We should get one good swimmer, right? To kind of also- You need a control. We're great swimmers. Oh. We're great swimmers. But I mean like a college- Yeah, yeah. We can fill the whole lane with, I'm saying you would have it shot from far out and you'd have the whole lane. So everybody's the real swimmers except me and Dustin. You see if people can guess out of us. Who's the- I'm a real swimmer. Yeah, collegiate or high school swimmers versus- Yeah. Yeah. Now, how much time do you need to train?

Well, I don't even know where I can train. You know what I mean? It's wintertime. Yeah, it's more we had to set up and film this thing than the training. I'll go do it right now. I haven't been swimming a lot lately. I thought you said last week you needed some time to train. That's why I said that. Well, you wake me up and I'll be. When we initially started this, the whole thing was that we would get a little bit of time to train for whatever sport we wanted to blend in with.

I don't need time because I'm just gonna be walking around. Yeah. Uh, all right. You would tell us about our frames, our frames, aura, finding the perfect gift can be really hard. Sometimes, uh,

Yeah, this Oriframe, we just got it. I don't know where it's at now, but it's... I am a big fan of this. It's named the number one best digital frame by Wirecutter. Wirecutter, they are an easy, thoughtful gift to give your loved ones. You can throw pictures on there. I love the idea. I mean, I always think with phones, it's like you never go look at these pictures. But now with this...

Go to the ocean and swim. That's where you get the best training. That's like some rocky training. You're fighting the waves out there. The ocean's trying to throw you back. Yeah. All right. This week we're talking about. This is the most fired up I've been. I'm sorry. I know. That's why it's so funny. I can't. You walk out with that shirt on. Yeah.

And do you reveal just, and you have that shirt, but as a swimsuit. By the time we're ready, I'm going to be, if we're going to do it, I'm going to be ready to go. Yeah. Well, look, well, let me, let me figure out where we could like, I do what I think I have this thing. It would be fun for us to shoot something like this and we could all kind of do it. And it would almost, I would say all of us just do, we would all do each sport, whatever anybody picks and you got to blend in.

And just see who could blend. It'd be fun and stupid and silly. And that's what we give to people. Pointless. We're trying to give pointless. What's the point of this? There is no point. I agree. Yeah. So we're doing it. We're good. We're a more legit race. I think I can beat you.

Well, I'm ready. Yeah. But, you know, just for the record, though, this whole thing is not about me and Nate racing in a pool. I mean, I'm down to do it, but it's like it's taking on a life of its own here. Yeah. I mean, now it's like some challenge between me and Nate to win. I mean, of course I'm in, but what's the sport you're blending in with?

Well, long snapper, long snapper. Yeah. Well, I'm not involved in this, man. I'm just watching. No, no. You being involved. The person just said the swim. You really took that. It really bothered you.

You can be the other guy. He's a ref. I don't know what a ref is going to do in the swimming race anyway. That's perfect for me. He'll be perfect. He's a ref. You're the obstacle we got to go around. It's like putt-putt. You know every race needs one guy with a shirt on in the pool. So why don't you be that person that goes in? You want to race? Can you swim? Yeah.

You swim fast? I can swim. No, not fast. You want to race? You think you could? I'll race, y'all. Okay. Yeah, yeah. I think we should do both the freestyle. Is that what this is? Mm-hmm. And an underwater. You don't even know the term. It's not important to know the terms. You're talking about underwater. Who could swim the longest underwater? Yeah, I'm down for that, too. Yeah. Yeah. We got a lot of stuff. Yeah, I got a lot going on here. Yeah. All right.

All right. This week we're talking about mythical creatures. I feel like we just did that a little bit with us. Dusty, you are our mythical creature. Wait till we swim. I mean, I can't wait. Yeah. You might, you, you probably can talk underwater. Yeah. I can't wait. Yeah. I mean, I used to, I mean, growing up, I was a real swimmer. I mean, I was really, you know, we saw him in creeks and ponds and, and lakes. And now did you have the long hair then? Cause that could hold you back. Uh,

Yeah, it may. I didn't have it then, but I've had it at various times. How deep were your creeks? It depends. I mean, sometimes they got pretty deep. Up to a foot? We swam in the river a little bit. The river is different. The river is different. Well, we've walked some creeks where it's like this and then suddenly it opens up and it becomes big enough to swim in. Yeah. I've done this, but I mean, you're talking about

That's what, yeah. I mean, this is Rocky IV. You're training out in the mountains and he's going to have, you know. A team of a team behind me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're the Russian. Yeah. So. If I can change, we can all change. Yeah. Yeah. That's how it's going to end. And I had brain damage in the next episode. Did he? Yeah. Rocky V ruins the whole thing.

Oh, really? Yeah. Okay. So there's some new video that's come out just in the last couple of months of a new Bigfoot video. You probably saw that. I did not. I haven't been on. On that kick? What? On that Bigfoot kick? No, no, no. Did I see this? It looks like a Harry Potter movie. I might've seen this. I'm saying I haven't been like, yes, I did see this. But yeah, to me, it looks like someone in a suit. I would agree.

Because it's like the way he squatted down and stuff. I'm sure Colbert had something funny to say about it. A guy that's never going to get on Colbert. No, I'm sure he did. I don't know. Maybe Bigfoot would squat down if he thought a train was coming. Yeah, but I think it looks like a suit in the way the person, in the way that sits down. I wouldn't even believe that.

Colbert probably said, he's hiding behind the Mueller report or something like that. Put a fun spin on it. Sorry, Steven. Well, anyway, that got a lot of national news because it was out there. Now, the guy even shot it said it's probably a guy in a suit, but...

I mean, that's pretty elaborate. Yeah. Oh, so the guy who shot it claims like, I'm not involved. I didn't orchestrate this. No, he was just on the train. But I still think it's fake. He was on the train and just saw it. So this dude was out here just trying to scare people. Yeah. I mean, I think it's complete. That makes me think it's more fake. Like he knew to, you know, he knew a train went by that. And so.

It's a pretty good hoax. Yeah, it's fun. I mean, he was so far away that... So he's hoaxing just for the love of the game, this guy. Yeah. It almost doesn't even... It looks like a guy in hunting gear. Or it's real.

You know, like that. Like a sniper. Yeah. Like that's what. Like gully suit. Gilly suit. Yeah, yeah. What if that Bigfoot just like gotten a fight with his wife or whatever and he's like, you know what? I don't even care if they see me. He just went out and he just had to blow off some steam by throwing this out of the way. He's like, I don't even care now. I don't even care. I don't even care. Yeah. Once out. Let them see me. Yeah. Yeah. I like that. And he realizes what he did. And then he goes, I shouldn't be out here. Yeah. He sits down. We hide by this little bush. He blends in pretty good. I told you.

Are they in a cave? Yeah. I mean, I wish we could see more of the walk. It seems like it must have been a long walk to get out to where it's at. Show us more of the mountain. How far was that walk? You know? Yeah. I mean, it is amazing that big, are they called big foots or big feet? I think, oh, I don't know. Just big foot. Even if it's plural? Oh, plural. Plural.

Is it like deer? Big feet sounds crazy. I would think big foots. Big foots? Yeah. They're never seen anywhere. I mean, it's so hard. And then when guys just were out in the wide open in the middle of the day. You always think when some of them, you're like, how does, if you went to the train conductor and was like, let's stop it. Let's all go solve this once and for all. We'll solve this one. Yeah. Yeah. Like, let's go up to it. Yeah. It takes a train so long to stop though. And it looked like it was going over a bridge or something, didn't it? Uh-huh.

Or maybe not. No. No. Look, you got to do some climbing and they're going to have to say all the, well, what if people get hurt and they sue it? Like, yeah, that stuff. How can you not have just a flat, you know,

If you're like, if the stranger that goes, if anybody does this, you're on your own. If you get hurt, you cannot, you know, we're all act normal, but you will pay your own bills. Like, you know, we're trying to help as much as we can help. But, you know, cause then, because all the companies, they talk about liability. I don't really know what, you know, they're liable for this stuff, but how could you not just have a sign that says we're not liable.

See, you know, there's so much. Well, they would never do that because they're liable for like all this kind of stuff. There's some stuff, right? Not responsible for lost items or stolen items on it. They have signs like that. They can waive liability. Yeah. Yeah. But then they, but then they're, I always hate that in a hotel parking lot when the hotel says not liable. If your car gets broken into in the night and it's like,

Why, though? This is your parking lot. You can't give me some kind of safety? We're not even watching the parking lot. Just a heads up. Well, that means they're not, yeah. Yeah. I think they really encourage you, don't leave your luggage stuff in the car. Take it in with you. What if this train stopped? Big feet.

came out of all the mountain and just rushed the train. That's what I want to see. Like when Bigfoot is finally exposed, they're like, yeah, we're here and we're taking over. They're like deer. Yeah. There used to be not that many of them. And now. Yeah. 30 million. 30 million. Every mile down the interstate, there's another dead Bigfoot. And we think. Yeah. Just hitting seven foot tall men with your car constantly. And we think they're primitive, but they got guns and they're like ready to go.

Yeah. It's a real takeover. You think they need guns? You know, I don't know. I don't know if they need them, but why not? Couldn't hurt. Yeah. Couldn't hurt. Yeah. Yeah. They would probably take them. Yeah. Yeah. Why not? If you offered it to them, they'd be like, oh, sure. Yeah. I'll keep it on me. Yeah. Okay. Something goes down. So you just mean you've been so busy, you hadn't kept up with like the latest Bigfoot thing.

Like the newsletter. No, like any news stuff. Like I haven't. Yeah. I like Twitter. I don't, I don't have that on my phone anymore. And so, and I don't even know my, uh, I had a different one too. I don't know my login. And so it's like, I just haven't any kind of like, it's been pretty good. Any kind of up to date kind of stuff. I don't really know what's going on. Uh, which has been nice. Yeah. Yeah.

So, but I did see this. So whatever that tells you. Yeah. There was also just a new Loch Ness monster sighting. Pretty good one. I mean, not as good as that, but usually it's nothing. And this one, at least you can see something. I do believe in the Loch Ness monster. I don't know if I believe in these pictures.

I do believe in it. Yeah. But why are they not just skim the whole lake? I think it's a really, it is a really big, I think it's harder to do than you think. Right there. You can see it's pretty, I think it's, it would take a lot of resources that they're not willing to commit to find a mythical creature, you know? So like there's a new documentary that's coming out, I think next year. And they just saw, I guess something while they were out there and they didn't get video of it, but they, uh,

Now I guess you can collect DNA of the water and send it to someplace in Colorado to find out what it is. Colorado's really got the scoop on it all, huh? I guess so. I guess so. Man, that's a good looking picture right there. Yeah. Looks like an alligator. It's like a hippo. Yeah. It says he took these pictures in 2018, but he was afraid of public ridicule. So he's been holding on to them for five years. I think it was a woman that took it. Wow. And now she's fine.

Yeah. It's just like, I guess now the public will be more receptive to this. They need to know about it. Yeah. Cause as time goes on, we're less likely to ridicule. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think the world has got more ridicule. Yeah. Like you should have released it five years ago. Yeah. Yeah.

Anyway, they sent off this DNA to this lab in Colorado and they said it came back algae based, which is so funny to me because I feel like they just collected some algae. Yeah. But they were all excited. They're like, oh, okay. Tell us it's, it's, you know, he's an algae based monster. Uh, they like, they spun it to make it seem like. Algae based as opposed to like a carbon based. Yeah. Here's what I believe happens when you do that. When you send it off.

Then that facility gets it, sits it on a table and they go, and then they Google where the lake is and there's no, and it doesn't even really matter. And then they go, we're big, you know, and they really are not doing anything. They're just, it's people in a room going, we're a scientist. And we, this person has to give me a hundred dollars to do this. And then I mail a letter back and I go algae based. That's what my aquarium is. What do I care? And then, then the people go, Oh,

Ooh, algae-based. Yeah, I agree. Because I don't know what, you know. To me, that sounds like nothing. Because if you can do that, how can you not scan that lake? Because it's harder than, if you can take DNA from a lake, how can you not scan it? Well, I think you have to get close to where you actually saw it.

I know, but just go take a thing over it, like a printer, and just scan it. Or just a whole document. You can scan a picture. It's funny. You can...

You can... Why not just... Like a giant printer that just go over the whole... Yeah, just like a giant printer. 15 miles away. Yeah. You can park your car in the driveway. Why can't you land on the moon? That's the same analogy. That's not the same analogy. You said you could scan a picture so you could... Are we not scanning the moon or something? Don't they scan the moon and like show the surface of the moon? What do you mean by scan? Like just...

Just check it out? You know how you see a 3D thing of like when they show a drawing of how deep the ocean is? Yes. Here's how deep the ocean goes and they show you where it goes. How do you know how deep it goes? I don't think they do.

then that's fine. Then you can't do it. Well, the depth might be one of the easier things to figure out. Well, you drop a bloop, see how long it falls around. Yeah. Or something on a string or something. Oh, yeah. You have a string that's 50 miles long. It's not 50 miles deep, dude. I think the deepest they can go is like seven or eight miles. And I think it goes deeper. Like the ocean? Yeah.

But if they can figure out how deep the ocean is, why can't you just scan this one lake? Loch Ness, its deepest point is 755 feet. So they know.

So that's not even that deep. It's the second deepest lake in Scotland. Wow. That's not even the first deepest. How deep is 755 feet? Yeah. About 755 feet. How many miles? 126 fathoms. 5,280 miles. What is fathoms? A feet is a mile. According to George Washington. Yeah.

Yeah, 5,280 feet. Easy number to remember. It's 14%. 14% of a mile. I don't even know what a fathom is, though. That said, 128 fathoms, which sounds awesome. Yeah, a fathom is a unit of length equal to six feet. Huh. Why don't we use that? Fathoms. I'm about a fathom tall. You're about a fathom tall. Yeah. Dusty's about half a fathom. I'm a half a fathom, according to you guys. I'm a half a fathom. Yeah. Jeez.

But if that's the second... Roll Tide, brother. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Fathom. That's a good... Fathom is fun. Fathom, Fortnite. We need to start pulling this stuff out. You know what I mean? Knot. You ever talk about knots? No. I've heard of it. But people say knots. In like aeronautics? Yeah. Or nautics. Yeah. Yeah. Like in the water. Yeah. Slightly more than one mile. Oh, so what's the point?

Anyway. Well, I think that, yeah, I think it, I don't think they can really, I mean, like some of you do 3d. I mean, they have your, your mapping. The whole world is mapped. The whole world is mapped. They've got a Google car that drives up to around the whole United States of America. We can show you every street in America. So you can't make one of those to go underground. I think it was harder. Yeah.

I just like that summary. But that doesn't mean their answer can't be, well, water's more. That's a little bit tougher. How do you wake up at night? Yeah. What is that Kramer? When he goes. Telling time. Telling time. What about night? Well, night's a little tougher. Look at this. Here's a 3D rendering of Loch Ness. But even if you did that. This is what you're talking about, right? Yes. But you want to include all like the fish and everything in it. Yeah. I mean, just maybe type in a big thing. Type in.

A giant object. Is there a well-like creature swimming around? Maybe if that pops up... What if there's caves under there that they don't know about? Well, then you can keep exploring that. You can be like, all right, maybe there is caves and that's why we don't know. But if it's like we scanned this entire lake. So there it is. You did that. And so if you do that, you can't also...

Have some kind of something, sonar, something that beeps and goes like, hey, there's a whale over there. We can see if there's sharks and whales and we go and can track them. I know we don't have a tracker on it, but... I feel like there has been sonar that is beeped and they think it might be something. Well, who would be doing this? I don't know. Maybe just any of our...

the government's any of the money that they're using. I mean, do something used for any of the- Fun stuff. Yeah, do some fun stuff. I don't see what else, again, what else is being sold. Would there be a reason? In this case. Would there be a reason though that they wouldn't want us to know about a Loch Ness Monster? Well- I mean, I don't know. No, there could, yeah. Maybe there, yeah. If you want to go down that road, but I'm saying- But I mean, is there though? I don't, I'm not saying there is, but I mean, you know.

Because if we have all this technology, why would they not want to just go, all right, it's not real. It's not in there. Yeah, I think people just – the word that decision gets made, those people are not talking about the Loch Ness Monster. And so that's what I think. That's why I don't think it gets done. Because whoever could put money into this is just – their days are full of just –

you know, making bad decisions and choosing to do stuff. they're not talking about the Loch Ness monster because they honestly, they don't have time to talk about the Loch Ness monster. So they don't, they don't think, well, no one cares about the Loch Ness monster. It's because they don't live in a reality where you go, no, we're all talking about the Loch Ness monster every day. Yeah.

Well, it's like people that live around this. We can't get past it. People that live around this lake say that they've spotted it, you know? Yeah, again. Yeah, I know. But this is like Bigfoot. Like there has to be, you could, you can't tell me we sent out, been like, look, here's 30 guys. You're our Bigfoot team. Whatever you need, you can have. We want full proof of a Bigfoot. Why not go figure it out? Either because it's not real.

I think Bigfoot's different, right? Because if this thing is supposedly in this lake, then it's like what you're saying. We have all this tracking. We have all this scanner. We have the rendering of the lake. Why not go in there and just be like, all right, it's not in here. We've officially can tell you that it's not in here. Wow.

Why not just do that? Yeah. I mean, if they did, the enthusiasts would be like, you don't know. It's a giant lake. There's no way you could scan that whole lake. I don't know if you could ever convince somebody of that.

It's also hard to justify the funding for that. I'm guessing if you're an elected official. I don't see how. There's a lot of funding for things that doesn't make a lot of sense. Yeah, there's, I mean, if you really. I think this is funding people could get behind. Easy. I honestly believe people would get, because they'd be like, at least I'll get to see something done. Right. Like, this is the thing, I'm telling you, when they go, when you give all this money to cancer and all this stuff, and nothing is getting, it feels like we're getting nowhere. But if I were running against you, I'd make you look like a loon, dude. I don't.

I don't think you would. Yeah, you want to get $50 million to go find a unicorn. I'm trying to solve real problems over here. What was your plan to solve it? Because you don't solve it. I'm actually going to show you that I can solve a problem. Well, yeah, we're going to cross the Loch Ness Monster off the list. It's a thing that's been going around. The healthcare system is failing. I mean, you're wasting time searching for fairies and leprechauns. Yeah, but no money. The healthcare is... It's Ireland. Yeah, you're just putting money into wasting money into like, who knows, it's sending money anywhere. Yeah.

You're just, otherwise you're just sending money to pointless things that we keep coming to. At least I'm trying to solve real problems. But you're not because every, every election is, well, let me tell you how I can solve. Nothing has actually ever been completely. So like, it's nothing like, I wanted to show you something that's marked off that goes, we're done. You'll get to the bottom of it. We're getting there. And this is the, this is where we're starting. Yeah. JFK stuff. You could be like, we're going to get done with like, I'm going to solve this.

Here's the stuff. It is solved. It is done. And then that's done. If they could say there is a Loch Ness Monster, imagine the tourism that could come to this area. Right now, there's tourism off of a conspiracy of a Loch Ness Monster. Well, they might not. They might kill it if they go and there is no Loch Ness Monsters.

That's the other thing. You don't want to reveal that it's not there. And they might not let them go. So I could see they go, no, you're not allowed to go do it because maybe you do want the myth of this thing. Like it's fun to say it's there or whatever. They could solve stuff. But what if we found out there were a whole species of these things? That famous photo was now 90 years old.

Yeah, what if there was a whole species and we could start breeding them and have them in zoos and aquariums? And now it's suddenly a new animal that we've discovered in the 2000s to be like, look what we did. Look at this great achievement. Is the belief that it's only one thing or is it like Bigfoot where it's a bunch of them? Well, that's why my point is they call it the Loch Ness Monster. Or Nessie.

Nessie. Yeah. Yeah, she would have to be dead now. Yeah, I was going to say, if it was there, it's probably gone. But what if there were multiple? What if you found the body of it? What's the oldest animal that's ever lived? Turtle, right? Yeah. 200 years old? Yeah, like 200 years old. So have they been talking about Loch Ness for... That photo's 90 years old. They think that might be a circus, or not a circus, but just an elephant that they let in the water. I don't believe any of the...

videos and pictures, but I believe accounts of people that say they've seen things. Yeah. But the only thing with that is like you do, you can hear stuff and see stuff. Like if you go out, if you're out in the woods on your own, you're going to hear whatever your mind wants you to hear. Yeah. If you want to see a Bigfoot, I, you can, you can go see a Bigfoot because your mind is just, it's the brain is,

I do think there's something in these, like some mystery in these lakes and oceans that we don't know about. I agree too. I mean, we know nothing about the oceans. Yeah. I'm going to concede a point to you guys, because I'm reading this at the university of Copenhagen has been tracking a shark in the waters of the Arctic that they believe is between 272 and 512 years old.

First of all, it's a huge range for age. Who knows how old this thing is? But if we're able to track a random shark in the ocean, surely we can just track down and find an individual thing. But you got to catch it. They caught it and then put a tracker on it.

I know that, but they found this. They found it. Well, if we catch the Loch Ness Monster, we shouldn't lose him. You think we'll tag it and throw it back in? Yeah. Like it's a bass? I just don't think you, how would you not already found it? Like I just, there's something that tells me they don't want you to go look for it because it is, the whole town is built on this. Yeah. If I went to the Loch Ness, you know, if you, it would all just go away.

There's a clam named Ming who lived to 507 years old. And then a 2006 marine biologist accidentally killed Ming by prying open the shell. Oh,

How do you accidentally kill him? You accidentally pried open his shell? I think you just mix it in with your lunch that day or something by accident. And just, you're like, oh, man, that was Ming. What was that? Killed by Ming? How would he not? Ming was the name of the clam. I'd like to know the name of the scientist that killed Ming. Well, saying accidentally killed it, you pried it open. So that's, you know. And then, hey, why don't you just grab another clam and go, oh, that was a Ming. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. How are you going to tell?

Yeah, I mean, it's like, yeah, I mean, there's some mystery out there. And I, you know, it's like, you know, they just, when did they just, we talked about this, but when they discovered the gorilla, like the early 1900s or something, it's like, yeah, we need our own discovery for this millennium. Yeah. The oceans, 91%, I don't know how they know this if they don't know the species, 91% of ocean species have yet to been classified. Right.

And more than 80% of the ocean is unmapped, unobserved, and unexplored. So there could be a lot of stuff in there. That's what I'm saying. Maybe this lake has some cave connecting to the ocean and Loch Ness dips back out. I think people don't want to go look for stuff too. If you really look at it, to go map an ocean is probably very boring and takes a lot of time.

A lot of money. A lot of money. Again, I don't know where you make the money up to be. But whatever it is, the money is, you know, it doesn't make sense for like our earth to be, we're all on this earth.

We should all be like, let's map the oceans. That's my whole argument against space exploration. It's like 90% of the ocean is not explored. And we're like, let's go to Mars. We can do both. I'm saying. They're doing both. I know, but it's. Let's put some focus. I know what it means. It's like, let's. Let's go to our home planet. Let's go really figure out these oceans. We have to leave Earth at some point, though. Why? Really?

because the sun is going to explode. Yeah, but that's in billions of years. Well, at what point do we have to start thinking? I think we could map the ocean before we get there. I think we just do what we do and then they're in the ones that need to leave will know how to leave.

It's not for us to... That's the problem. You're trying to figure out a problem a billion years away. Well, that's a pointless problem. At some point, you have to, right? I thought you were going to say our natural resources would run out. Well, that's part of it too, but also... Maybe there's more below the ocean. There is an eventual... The sun will explode. The sun will die. It will swallow the earth. Yeah, well, we've got some time on that one. All over the place. We do have time, but...

How many planets out there in the universe have there been where they, that just died off because they didn't, but you're looking so far that you're not, that you're forgetting about the people that are, that the problems that are right now. Right. Yeah. What did they say? Don't put the cart before the horse. Yeah. You know what I mean? You're in your cart is way ahead. Yeah.

You just brought the cart, left the horse back there. And they go, well, who's going to carry this? You got to look for it. And you go, well, the sun's going to. How's your light year been? You know what I mean? Yeah. How's your light year been? Yeah. That's good. If you want to help the people out that are going to have to solve this, you need to go solve. You need to just be the master of our assigned master of our own domain.

You need to just let's know everything about our world. Who cares about what the future is? Let's have the answers for this. Absolutely. I mean, what are your answers about the future are all like, kind of like guesses. What if we could actually give you a no, that's the thing.

Nothing is fun in solving the actual problem that we need now. You don't think it's fun trying to figure out how to go to a different planet, set up shop on Mars? Very, very fun. Yeah. And a child would think like that, that it goes, well, all right, well, here's your fun ideas on how to get to another planet. Uh-huh.

What's our oceans? Well, oceans are dark and I don't like them. So that's your answer to oceans? Under ocean civilization down there. They actually have all the space technology that we need. And the key was right here all along. Yeah. Guess what? When the sun explodes, why would we not want to just go live underwater? Yeah. It'd be nice and cool down there. Yes, exactly. Yeah. Plenty of salt for the dogs to lick. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah.

Why would you not figure that? That's the same thing as living on space in a planet. You got to breathe, but it's much easier. We can work on this problem. And you know how many people can work on it? Everybody. All of us. Because there's no water. Yeah. Even he believes there's an ocean. Yeah, exactly. We got everybody. Everybody's on board. Everybody's on board with it. Okay.

All right. Well, because, you know, because there's the money is better used in a make believe like because the more I can go raise money, everybody can see the ocean. So if you're trying to raise money, everybody's like, well, there's the ocean. But if I go, all right, but there's Mars and there's all this stuff that only this person knows and you get to believe in that person and go like, ooh.

That person's saying a lot of stuff that I've never heard. And I bet they're right. I like them. So yeah, go do that. Solve how to get to Mars. Let's walk into NASA and go, listen, we're shutting it down. All of you now focus on the oceans. You're now called no. So yeah, you're going to focus inwardly.

Inwardly. Yeah. Instead of outward. What is NASA? National Ocean Space Organization. Yeah. Ocean space. I like that. NOSA. NOSA. Yeah, NOSA. National Ocean Space. National Ocean Space. Ocean space. Ocean space. Yes.

No space. We got rid of space. Well, it's like the ocean, the space of ocean. What does A stand for? Ocean stuff. Ocean stuff. National Ocean Stuff Association. NOSA. NOSA. No so. Organization. Yeah. But not organization. We just do National Ocean Stuff Association.

And you say ocean again. No, sir. Because then once you get to the ocean stuff, then everybody goes, well, something space has got to come out. And you go, no, ocean again. We're doubling down. Yeah. We only do ocean stuff.

And we're the national, we're the national, we're the national, uh, national ocean, sea ocean, just to, you know, so we're all bodies of water. Yeah. So it's like all bodies of water. Uh, while you're looking that up, why don't you tell us about it? Hello, fresh dusty. Oh, I'd love to.

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The holidays are right around the corner and HelloFresh can take the stress out of you. There is a remote island called Sumatra and there's a creature called the...

Orang Pendek. And it's kind of supposedly a mix between like a monkey and a human. And for over 100 years, local villagers, different people, tribes have said that they've spotted this thing. Oh yeah, I've seen this video. These guys on this motorcycle were out riding. And this is kind of recent. And there's video of them like, and they see the thing running. It's wild. That's a spear in its hand.

Oh, really? Oh, man. Yeah. Now, I think it knocked one of the guys. This video is wild. I mean, it's hard to see. Watch this. Yeah, there he is. He looks back at the guy knocked down and then they kind of take off. They see him a little bit more. There he is running.

And then if you're listening at home, just go. And then he runs into the grass. Yeah. So what about that interaction? You would think this is anything other than a human that just looks totally like a human being to me. It runs. It does. Yeah. Just like an uncontacted tribe guy. Okay. Kind of got lost. That's what it looks like to me. Is he naked? Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Well, they wear a little loincloth, but they don't... I mean, to bring Lebanon into this... Naked. That's why I don't think we're that deep into science and stuff.

I don't think they let us because of that. Every smart Southern person we got, we got just a guy going, what is he, naked? And you're like, dude, we're trying to solve real stuff, man. And then that just gets- It sets us back. It sets us back. And they're like, we can't.

Walk this guy out to talk to the world about, I think we found an untouched alien. He was naked. And the whole universe is like, what? This guy's in charge? We'll listen to him. Yeah, that's true. Now, I read the comments on YouTube. People say it's fake, but...

I don't know. Not everybody. That's what the comments said. Everybody's like, break down the comments. I read the comments. Typical stuff. They said fake. So here we are. I've seen this video. I don't know. I don't know what it is, but I don't think it's a human. It made me want to go ride those dirt bikes. Yeah. That'd look fun. Yeah. That's what I thought. I was like, you know, I've never rode a dirt bike. And I was like. It seems fun. Yeah. You can wear a helmet. I like anything with a helmet.

Yeah. Yeah. Especially if you took your dog, your dog probably sniffed for a while after that thing went into the grass like that. Yeah. That would be, I don't know. You'd have to keep it, you know, maybe get one of those like e-bikes, probably take one of those would even be better. We're not doing an ad, but it's, if you took one of those and rode it, probably not as fast, probably for, you know. But you don't think on some remote Island, there could be something that.

We've never encountered before. Yeah, yeah. But there's a bunch of stuff we haven't seen yet. Yeah, I bet there's more. That's why we need to leave here and go to Mars. Yeah. We don't even know everything. Where are we going to tell Mars about us?

When we get there. Mars is like, how's your oceans? We're like, well, we only know about 10%. We didn't do the motion because with oceans, we're all the good stuff. When we meet Mars, the first thing you're going to go, dude, tell us about your oceans. No, he's going to have a lot of water. We've been to Mars. There's nobody there. We barely been there. Yeah, that is.

Yeah, we sent a robot out there. That's like going to Earth and being like, well, I drove the old Hickory and no one else is on Earth. It's a whole Earth. It's a whole world. Okay, that's true. They could be on the other side. And Mars is bigger than Earth, right? A good bit bigger. No, it's smaller. Is it smaller? How much smaller?

How much? I'll say two-thirds of Earth. What does that even mean? How many Americas can fit in Mars? Mars is only slightly more than half the size of Earth. So you could land in the Grand Canyon of Earth and ride your rover around and be like, there's nobody around. Nobody. Yeah. You got to see the sky. How are we going to move all...

Some people ain't moving. Yeah. And we're going to need to know about the oceans. That's why you're already, because you want to, when they start moving people, you're like, well, I said from the beginning. Yeah. Where's all the, we should be moving. Yeah. Unfortunately, I don't think those are the people that are going to get an opportunity to leave. It's just going to be. Yeah. When is the sun really going to. Billions, couple of billions of years. And we're planning it now. Well, no, I'm saying, I think we should. I mean, at what point do we need to think about it?

In 4.5 billion years, the sun will die and our solar system will not survive. Dude, that's so funny. I'd say in 4 billion years. The arrogance to think we could solve something that society, 1 billion years from now, they would still use our stuff. At what point do you get started?

At 4 billion years. Yeah. Yeah. Give it that 0.5. 500 million years. I think right now it's still like on discovery earth mode. Yeah. And when you're a million years from now. Yeah. If you want to say a million years from now, you're going to still be like, I remember when I invented that, uh,

wrench that's supposed to help the spaceship go to Mars. And they're like, yeah, we do remember that, man. Thanks, dude. Oh, you're still using that, aren't you? Yeah, we could have figured it out probably on our own because we're, you know, we can breathe underwater now because we're millions of years different. That's what you think. Imagine if these cavemen were sitting around going, we should invent something like a wheel or something to get in there. Go. Come on, dude.

But think about where that wheel's taking us now. But what if they were like, we won't need the wheel for another 4.5 billion years? But I'm saying you invent the wheel for the time being. If a caveman goes, hey, I'm building this wheel so when we have to move to another planet, you'd be like, well, you're obnoxious and annoying and not solving the problems we have right now. But what if also by getting started, you're doing something?

the most amazing thing human beings have ever done. You think there's any value in going, let's do the most amazing thing that's ever been done before? There is for the people that are on the earth right now and for the future. But if you're skipping ahead and you're really mentally thinking about

the end goal, the end thing, like, well, let's get started because then we can use this for Mars. That, I believe, is arrogant. And that, I believe, is... This is arrogant. Not you're saying that. I'm not saying you're... I don't mean it, but you don't. But that thought process is ridiculous, I think, to be like, well, that's the same thing where they go, if we have so many problems here, let's solve the problems here and not worry about this other kind of stuff. I get your, like, whatever. You could be going to... You could be doing this stuff, but...

They solved the wheel for them. And then the wheel, I can't say it, but we still use it today. Obviously, that's changed everything. But if they would have said, we're going to make this now for cars...

And they only thought about, well, how can we use this for a cart? Well, now you're like to the cart in front of the horse thing. You're so far, you can't even solve a problem now. Because if you, like if you, the first will would not have worked on a car. But if they're trying to make it for this, like it's something you can't even imagine. You don't even know what Mars looks like. So if you're trying to be like, well, this is a thing that's going to use for Mars one day. I'm sure everything will be used for Mars.

As it goes forward, just dominate your time on Earth. Let's put it on the calendar. Yeah. 4.5 billion years. And then we'll start to pay attention to it. I'm all for space exploration, though, because a lot of other stuff could happen. Asteroid could hit Earth.

Right. The dinosaurs can get wiped out. You're right. I'm not saying you don't go see this stuff, but if everything you're solving right now, it's like be awesome at your time. When your time is here, be the best at your time and create things going forward. What if the cure for cancer is at the bottom of the ocean? It probably is. You know what I mean? Yeah. What if it is?

And we're like out here looking at space. What if it's on Mars? But it's like, if you were like saying like, I'm when someone invents something and they're trying to invent something for, here's the invention of if I'm trying to make people that are deaf, be able to hear. And I want the people on earth that are deaf, that technology probably can be used to look at Mars. Sure. But I mean, but solve it for the deaf people. Don't start thinking like, just skip the deaf people and be like, I know, but,

It'd be more noble if you were really saying that, but you just said we should move cancer research to find the Loch Ness Monster. Yeah.

No, no. Go down in our oceans. Hey, I think we have the money for a lot of things. Yeah. Yeah. Right. And there's other projects. You could go do it. The Loch Ness Monster thing is just to be like, just show me that you will solve something. Yeah. Nothing is being solved. If you're only attacking problems that can really never be solved except with time, well, then that money is just like – or whatever your time and investment is just being –

like kind of lost. And if everybody's doing that, I'm not saying you don't have some people doing that, but if everybody's doing that, no one's ever getting to the end of something. So nothing is really getting solved. It feels like no one's just going like, Hey man, that thing is over.

So you're all of our brain. And the Loch Ness, I'm not saying you go do it for the Loch Ness monster, but it's like, just show me that you can solve something. If you, the technology you could use to solve the answer of a Loch Ness monster, I would imagine would be pretty good technology for Mars or wherever you go. You can go track down, like whatever it is. How are you going to track down a planet if you can't track down an animal? If you don't know the answer of your own planet, how can you not?

You don't know the answer of the planet you're on. You're telling me Mars ain't going around faster than a Loch Ness monster? If you go see an alien and you go to the alien, you go, do you know everything that exists on your planet? They're going to go, yeah. Why would we not know everything that exists on our planet? We're going to go, well, there's a lot of stuff that people wonder about. I just don't know why you can't do both. I think we are. You're not doing both, though. The answer to stuff is not getting solved. The Loch Ness stuff is not getting solved. You can.

go read all your articles about the future that you want. It's all like if this happens and this happens and this, it's all that kind of stuff. So I'm just saying there feels like there's a lot more people thinking about the future than there is about the present. And the thing is you need to be dominant in the present. The present is what sets up the future. We need the cavemen to make the will just for them to get their things around. I don't need them to make the will to think about the car.

I need them to make the will to get their family food. And that's it. Well, what I'm saying is now in 2023, we have, a lot of us have our basic needs met. We can afford to start thinking long-term about the. But you can't keep bringing up problems like the world toilet, you can't, the toilet, you like that, like that thing, or like any other, you can't keep bringing up these things and being like, well, there's homeless and there's hunger. All right. That then it's not solved.

Either they're unsolvable and we need to have to somewhat...

Yeah. Move on, like figure this out. We're getting clogged into this system to be that you can't move forward. It's like getting stuff off your list. Like if, if you want to go have a, I'm trying to work on it now. Like I, we talked about it before, like sitting in silence, like really knocking something off your list. If I need to go work out or need to go run in the morning, if I need to go do this, I need to, if it's, if it's, and I'm not,

good at it. I'm just learning, but I have to get it done. And then I don't think about it the rest of the day. But if I'm thinking about it the rest of the day, it becomes an overwhelming thing. I then don't want to do it. And then I can then talk myself into going, I'm just going to go to McDonald's. I'll start tomorrow, all that kind of stuff that happens in the real that if that can happen to me, I'm no different than a scientist, not God.

They're just people. So they're going to have the same emotions and feelings that anybody else would have. So you would just go, all right, well, you know, we got homeless everywhere. We got all this stuff. And you're like, yeah, that doesn't bog you down. And you're going to sit and go, oh, well, we need electric cars. Yeah, man. But like,

I can't really focus on electric cars when I'm getting every light I stop at. I'm getting asked for money. Like, is there something to this? You need to clean it up. You know what I mean? Like, there's, of course, there's going to be people that can do it. You got to delegate. You can do all the things. Let's pay the homeless to look for Bigfoot. I mean, that's one of the better ideas I've ever heard. Yeah. And because that's fun. Yeah. I

I would go out there with them. Allocate some government funds. You could say, you would say, if you, again, if your taxes went to, like, you're like, all right, I like sometimes it's,

The world is where the, the, the, uh, the, everybody on earth, humans are not dumb. They're not dumb, but you get talked to very dumb. Right. And so you, they end up going, they use so many words and they make so much laws and all this stuff be so big that no one could ever go through any of this stuff.

And so no one can just see what you're like, well, what's the money going to? It's like kind of this, we're saying this, but then it's going to 50 other things. And then all you hear is like, we're trying to find Mars. And you go, well, I'll go to that. Well, what does that look like? That looks like a bigger thing than Mars.

Just going to, that looks insane. And you're, you know, it's like a giant, giant thing. And if you want to just write it off as going, yeah, the money's going to go to Mars. Okay. If the money's going to go to that toilet, is it going to give a family? That's what I mean. If you're going to, we're going to give money to Derek.

for what they do with G.O.D. And they give to, they go to Africa. But I'm, he's, I've given money to like, there's water in this town. Yeah. And I can see the water in the town and the people are going, there has to be a version of that with everything that you can't just go, well, it's a bunch of stuff you don't understand. Well, there's a point that I have to, maybe if we don't understand it, we shouldn't be going that far ahead. Yeah. Like go, go far enough to where you should be able to always explain it back.

Like that's almost everything that you should look for should be like, well, can you explain it to a regular person? That's not in your field. That's an Einstein quote. Einstein said the exact same thing. Oh, really? About, about. See, there you go. Nailing it. What about like a private company like Elon Musk?

Yeah, he can do whatever. I mean, you can go, anybody can go do whatever they want to go do. I'm not, I don't care what people do. I'm just, but Elon Musk made Teslas. You're seeing Teslas. Whatever you want to say about it, it's like,

We needed electric cars. There's an electric car. I can ride in the... And he's moved forward. Whatever it is, something got solved. Yeah. He has that... Whatever else he's trying to... I don't... What about SpaceX? He's trying to go to Mars and stuff. Then he can go to Mars. I'm not saying you can't go to Mars. I don't think he takes...

you know, it's just, it's his money. That's right. That's why I'm asking. So it's like, if it's your money, I'm not here to tell you how to spend it. I'm just saying it gets very loose. But we could use an ocean political. We could use an ocean. Yeah. And maybe we know more about the ocean than we, maybe there's a reason at least just come out and go, you know, while we're not going for the ocean, because we generally think there's nothing that we've looked at where we think there would be stuff and it just would be a wasted, uh,

resource to go look, but give the answer. And maybe they're afraid of awakening the great octopus down there and they find out that they're highly intelligent and they do take over. Well, they did just find, I think you're searching for that quote, two octopus cities kind of made by octopus. Am I saying, I don't know what plural of

Octopi? Octopi or octopuses. Either one works. So there's some crazy stuff going on in the oceans. See, that's what I'm saying. Maybe they're like, listen, we get down there and start messing around with them. They're going to be like, well, we'll start coming up there. Yeah. Every time we go to the ocean, we come back with something. Yeah. I mean. Look at this guy. We don't. Every time we're down there going, all right, I'll go look. We're like, well, look what we found. You're telling me this guy doesn't have some wisdom? Yeah. Yeah.

He could tell us. Those things have been around for a long time. Yeah. Why don't we try to make them be able to talk? That's what I'm saying. Yeah. What about this? We will at NOSA. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. NOSO. NOSO. National Ocean Sea Ocean. Yeah. I like stuff. Ocean stuff. Stuff is fun. National Ocean Stuff Ocean. NOSO. I don't know. I feel like the other O should be National Ocean Stuff Ocean.

Obviously. Obviously. Yeah. That's what it is. That's what it is. National ocean stuff, obviously. Put a little comma in there. Yeah. Ocean stuff only. Oh, no. There you go. Ocean stuff. Look at that. Notre Dame. That's why he went. That's why you need college. It is. Because they come up with stuff like that. Look at these words. National ocean stuff only. National ocean stuff only. Yeah. We're not even doing that. Right, right, right. Only. And people try to bring in other stuff. We go.

Not till we've explored all the oceans. I don't care about the weather. The Loch Ness. We'll make that exception. Obviously, the Loch Ness. Yeah. Some lake stuff. We do some lake stuff. We do a little lake. Water related. Yeah. Yeah. Water related. Yeah. We're mainly ocean. Yeah. We'll go check out. Obviously, if people want us to go look at some lakes, we'll go look at some lakes.

It's got to be at least a knot deep, though. And then ASL... A fathom. Yeah. ASLS, which is another division and some lake stuff. And so we have a smaller...

On top of no-so, we have a smaller ASLS. And that branch is, what do y'all do? We do some lake stuff. What was Lou Gehrig's disease? ALS. No, no. So we won't make it A. So we'll get rid of this SLS. SLS. Some lake stuff. So SLS. No-so. No-so. And lake.

SLS. Some lake stuff. Maybe make it one long one. No, so... And then do A-L-S. Attach. Slars. What do we call it? We'll call it slars. S-L-A-R-S. Slars. That's some lake and river stuff. Yeah. I like the slars. Yeah. We'll do river. No, so and slars. You can almost do sleigh. Some lake and...

All right. Nevermind. Yeah. Yeah. Why it's tough. Yeah. The why is tough. Some lakes and yeah. Yeah. And why, why are we here? Yeah. All right. What about this? I like slurs though. Slurs sounds like you're, you know, you're struggling to say it. Yeah. And,

And I went in my hole. I'm going to do a dusty callback because this is the day of the dusty callback. Yeah. I'm not trying to preach anybody. I'm just, this is me. Of course. Like I'm kind of thinking out loud. Yeah. So I can't control those thoughts because they were just going. Right. I'm just asking a question. Sure. I want to just be dumbed down to me. Yeah. Let's figure out how to find everything on earth.

The idea that we think we've got it all figured out or we're just not going to explore it is unacceptable. We got a lot of people without a lot of unemployment. Let's put them to work. Yeah. Let's get some funding and be like, hey. If you're unemployed. Find Bigfoot. That would be, yeah. Look, there is no unemployment. Rickshaw driver. Unemployment is your finding Bigfoot. That's what we call the new unemployment. Oh, sure.

You want to be homeless? You're finding Bigfoot. Yeah. We'll set you up with a tent. You can camp anywhere you want. Anywhere you want. You got to be- We're going to have 7% of the population looking for Bigfoot at all times. That's a ton. Yeah. It's a bunch of people. And you're going to get them out in the woods-

You know, so we, you know, it's not. Well, there's an organization called SETI, Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence. We can't, but I mean. But my point is that's the same thing. That's real. They make coolers too. Real. Yes. But even looking for aliens, like we have submarines. You don't have spaceship. It costs. Why would you choose the thing that costs you?

Is it a billion, a hundred million dollars? A lot of money. Every one? Probably. That would just blow us out here. At first. And then you get to Mars and you find it. And then you melt the water on Mars, the frozen water that's on Mars. You melt that and then you can separate the hydrogen and the oxygen. You can make fuel from that. So it's going to cost less money eventually. But if we have the technology of all this map reading and all this, why would we not be using it on the oceans? And we already invented submarines. Right.

I'll give you those dime a dozen. He goes, what do you want? It's like a penguin. He goes, the guy that sells penguins is like, what do you want, a submarine? I'll give you a submarine. Throw in a submarine. Yeah. He goes, it's like a Honda Accord. He goes, I got too much. I got too many submarines. How many do you want?

That's what I'm saying. Yeah. Make Mars come to us. Yeah. You know, make Mars go. The whole point is to get farther away from the sun. Mars is like, we'd like to see what's going on on Earth. And our best move is just to hop over a planet. What about go to the moon? Well, that's a good place to start, right? Yeah. What's the next one? They're going to go. In a million years, when they're still reading our books, apparently, that we wrote, because thank goodness, they go, well, let's go back.

Can you imagine? They're going to go, let's go back four billion years ago. We're laying the foundation. That's the whole point. A guy that went to Notre Dame wrote. You have a biological drive to preserve the species. We probably need to leave this planet.

You don't feel any respect. Do you care? This genuine question. Okay. I'll give it. Do you care at all? Whether humanity continues to exist down the line indefinitely. It's hard. It's, it's hard to really wrap you like you can say you do. And I don't know if anybody can. It's unimaginable. I can't even, if you found out, if I told you definitively,

A million years from now, all humans are dead. That wouldn't bum me out a little bit. But you're talking about 4.5 billion. Well, let's get there. All right. It would, yeah, it would, it would, but it would bum me out. And it also wouldn't, because who am I to be thinking about a million, the people in a million years, like,

you're, you just overly don't think about anybody that's around you. I can impact what's around me. And hopefully that impact will then translate into a million years that they, these people are great people that I can just try to influence great people around me. And then that influence can keep spreading, keep spreading and keep growing. And so that's the thing that you could, that you could hope for. But no,

No, if you think if you're going to sit there and go like, I'm bummed out about the world ending in a million years. How do you even have a feeling for that?

How do you even emotionally have... I wouldn't be bummed out by it. You can't even... Yeah, you can't even... To me, and I'm saying it's not... I'm not saying it like I'm saying it to you. It feels like a very me problem. Like it's someone that's not thinking about other people. Even though you think you're thinking about the easiest people to think about the farthest away, which is like I get to care about people that I can't even imagine their existence. Right.

But then I get to be like, ooh, I care about these people. As you're looking at a person that has problems, you go, but I'm thinking about a basically Loch Ness monster. What do you think people are going to look like in a million years? What do you think the world is going to look like? I have no idea. You probably can't imagine. I think we're lucky. You're already sad for them. And you can't be sad for the people now. That seems crazy.

So, no, I don't think I care. I think you can be both again. You can be sad for the people now. That's the loony. You can't. But nothing. That's how stuff doesn't get solved is when you do both. 20, 50 times. Yeah.

What'd you say? 2050 tops. I think everything's gone by then. Yeah. And you're not even bummed out about that. That's a real answer. Yeah. Yeah. I think you can't, it's only being worried about the future. If you want to talk about where anxiety comes from and all this stuff comes from, it comes from problems that are not here. Yeah. That's where it comes from.

It's the person that's in it is usually not anxious. I don't know. This I don't know for sure. But I'd imagine when you don't have money to pay for your bills and you're working two jobs, you're not anxious. You don't have the luxury to worry about people from a million. That's so arrogant. That's so crazy. But you would think, I want them to solve Loch Ness Monster real quick. No, no. I know. But I'm not saying you don't go solve their problem. But I'm saying at least...

I'm giving you a problem that can be solved. Right. It is in front of us and it's right now. Versus a problem that you can always come back to me and tell me it can't be solved. Right. Going to Mars is... I don't know if I will ever be alive. I don't know if...

any of it we might not know this for 200 years if we can go to mars or not and then just one day be like never mind pluto's not a planet like you go your whole life learning i mean i had that joke about it but you learn your whole life pluto's a planet just to like that just a blink of an eye they go nope not a planet and you go oh okay well i mean i spent you know 15 years

That's how long I was in school. No, but you know, I spent forever in school telling me it was a planet and y'all just wiped it out. That's how heartless scientists are. Yeah. Yeah. It just goes away. It just goes away. Like it just seems, you know, like let's, let's maybe. I think humans will go to Mars in our lifetime.

In our lifetime? Even mine. In your lifetime? Yeah. I mean... Yeah. I'm not saying living there. I'm saying the first person...

We'll go there. Well, under Dusty's world, you're like, yeah, I mean, we might go to Mars. If you're listening, I'm using quotation marks. Yeah, we're already there. We shot a movie there. Matt Damon shot a movie there. He's been on Mars. Group Potato's up there. Yeah. He's fine. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. We might go to Mars. I would not – I hope not everybody's looking for that. I hope we have more people looking at the stuff we need here than the people that we need looking to go to Mars. Won a comedy award.

Yeah. That movie. Comedy or musical. Yeah, it's crazy. And there's good music in it. I saw them win a comedy award and the directors were offended. Yeah. At the Golden Globes. The Golden Globes. Whatever it was that I was watching. His buddy was the, what? Yeah. The screenplay? Yeah, Drew. Yeah. But they seemed to be offended that they had won a comedy award. Because it was up against...

Probably some real comedies. No. What's that movie about? The financial movie? The Big Short. I don't think that the comedy was offended that that movie was. I think they were like, this was a more serious movie. This was not really a comedy. Everything Matt Damon does is a little tongue in cheek. You know what I mean? It always looks like he's thinking something more than what he's saying. It is a good movie. I liked it, but I didn't think of it as a comedy either. Yeah.

Let me share this because I've been trying to share it for the last hour. Well, if you would have worked on your problems with the time it was happening instead of pushing it off into the future. You're right. Do two things at once. I mean, I'm older than any of you guys. We could have the Loch Ness Monster solved when I was a kid if I just got on it.

So you've got a predator on your shirt. Trying to figure out the deer and lemon first. It used to be a big deal when we saw deer. It was. Because I remember it'd be in the paper. Next day, get up, front page of the paper. What about four deer last night in Mr. Johnson's front yard? What? All dead. So this Colonel Remy Van Leerd, he was a Belgian pilot and fighter ace,

Fault in World War II, broke the sound barrier. He's kind of like our version of Chuck Yeager. Very well-respected guy. He said he was flying over the... That's all right. I have no idea who Chuck Yeager is. That's what he's our... Yeah, he was... Like the drink? No, Chuck Yeager was... He played... He was in the Allman Brothers. The Chuck Yeagers. All right, I'm sorry. I forgot my audience here. Yeah.

He's our juggernaut. Our juggernaut. Another guy I don't know. Oh, he's good. He's like our Michael Jordan. He's our Michael Jordan. He's our Leonard Skinner. Yeah. He's like our generation's Humphrey Bogart, just to put it in context. Anyway, he was flying over the Congo in Africa. He said he saw a snake 50 feet long. Wow. Wow.

Uh, it had a head, uh, three feet long, two feet wide. They took a picture of it. Then he told the helicopter fly back around, get closer to take a picture of it. The snake reared up 10 feet, like it was going to attack the helicopter. So they got out of there. So I'm, I'm setting him up. He's, he's not some lunatic. He's a guy that was very well respected and says he saw this giant snake in the Congo. Uh,

Just another, we just don't know what I'll picture of it. That's it. Oh, it's hard to tell what that could be. Earthworm. But yeah, my point is this guy, you know, he was very credible and we don't know what's out there in the jungles either. Yes.

Well, I love this story. Yeah, I love the jungles. Yeah. And that stuff is, yeah, what's going on out there? I mean- We don't know a lot of stuff. King Kong lived on Skull Island. That was kind of loosely based off the Galapagos. I can't say that word. The island. Galapagos. Where they have their own environment and things grow differently. There's giant tortoises and there's just maybe places out there. I like that Skull Island. King Kong Skull Island. That was great. Yeah.

The movie? Yeah. Yeah. But he lived in a place where there were giant animals because they had their own environment. And there's places in the world where they said everything's smaller because there's not enough food to eat. So over time, they evolved and there's baby pythons and baby elephants. Or not baby, they're small miniature. And hobbits come from there. So things can happen.

You know, it could be giant things and parts of the world we don't know about. All right. I'm into it. I mean, I agree. That's what I'm saying. Is there a lot more stuff too? We didn't really get to. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I guess we can stop. Yeah. We can stop and try to combine with another. Cause it is fun. Yeah. Yeah. To talk about when you add it up for another episode or something. Yeah. Let's just stop then.

Yeah. All right. Yeah. And look, anything I said, I don't know what I'm saying. I'm just asking questions. None of us know what we're talking about. No, you're just asking questions. It got heated a couple of times on this one, and I like it. I mean- I don't know how it got heated. You got heated about swimming. That's about it. Yeah. That's about it. Yeah. But well, all right. One time it got heated, and I'm into it. We had a lot of water talk here.

I talk about swimming a lot. And then we haven't done so. Well, I feel like we make fun of it. But with you here, Aaron, we do get into the college perspective, which is how everybody else is. Hello. You're college. Yeah, we're in one building, the whole college. Yes. Single room school. Single room school. I know about it. Every day. Naked people. Naked. You see how many deer? They got...

I saw 17 deer on the way to this school. I'm in Manhattan. Yeah. Auburn Agricultural School. Come to Middle Tennessee State University. Yeah.

They were doing some work there at Middleton State. Yes. But I think it is a good perspective of a college. And I'm being honest. Mm-hmm. That. I didn't mean... This is supposed to be a dumb, fun podcast, but it's... I had a great time. I had a great time. I had a great time, too. I'll add it to my end-of-year airing of grievances. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I always put Nate's airing of grievances during Festivus. Yeah, but we got...

No, so no, I mean, yeah, it's Lars Lars came out of this some Lake and River stuff. And I think there should be a bit of a organization for homeless people tracking down Bigfoot. I mean, that is, we got that too. Yeah. Sometimes you got to weed through. What do you, is it hard to get a diamond? One of those things. Yeah.

If you're listening, that was Dusty and Nate that were on board with that. It's hard to get a diamond. It's hard to get a diamond. I am on board with it. And I think a lot of homeless people will be on board with it too. That's fun. I think I would volunteer for it. Yeah. If you go, we'll give you this amount of money. Give them supplies. Supplies. Yeah. Food. Weapon of some kind. No. Well, yeah.

You could give them, you train them. If you're dropping them way deep in the jungle or whatever, yeah, give them a whack. You're dropping them. Yeah. Paratrooping out of a plane. Yeah. Yeah. We're just throwing homeless people out of an airplane. Parachutes. I mean. Don't be ridiculous. Yeah. Don't be. Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, I feel like a lot of times you're searching for something and that's what kind of leads you down that path. Right. Now you're literally going to be searching for something. And then they, you know, we make sure that everybody's taken care of. I don't know. This one might not need to come out. We're filled with vibe. Maybe we'll do one. Before we release this episode, we'll do one.

We do one call Tuesday night. Everybody's still cool with all this. We release it for an hour and then reevaluate. Yeah. Yeah, we'll release it today because there's all the people that listen to it very early. They're going to be our sample audience. Yeah, that's our core group that they can let us know like, hey, was it? Everything was all right, right? Like, you know, they're like, yeah, yeah, you're right. They're like, you know, I don't know. It doesn't matter. We're just trying to be fun. Yeah.

Uh, and nothing's funner than making homeless people go find big. Well, you know, I would like to say that I'm talking about paying them. You know, there's a compensation. You're not a real job. You know, they don't have to do it. Kramer and Newman with the rickshaw. Yeah, that's it is. It is that they don't have to do it. We're not saying it's, but it's, it's like, if you want to get paid, I just think it's a job. It's a job. It's, you would offer it to people to go like, you know, the way people go to, uh,

They study abroad. It's kind of that. Yeah. Very similar. So you're offering it to anybody. They're going to spend a semester. Looking for Bigfoot. Looking for Bigfoot. I just think if I were homeless and I were like, man, I'd love to get out of being homeless. You're still homeless. A lot of people think he's homeless now. I'd love to get out of being homeless. And then somebody comes along with an opportunity and an adventure. Hmm.

I'd take it. Am I going to have a home now? No. You're going to be in the jungle. No, you would have a home. Maybe after. You'd be the next Neil Armstrong. I mean, if you were the guy that found Bigfoot. Yeah. I had a joke about that a long time ago. I was like, imagine watching the Bigfoot hunting shows.

Like, oh, yeah, my joke was like, I watch it because it's fun and there's a chance the world will be different because it like it always be like if they come on and said we have Bigfoot. Yeah, it's everybody's got to be like, well, it's different. And there's proof and there's, you know, yeah, like that's even aliens. If they come and go, here's an alien body.

That's why probably. Except for when the Mexican government did that. Not long ago. Exactly. But it was proven that it was fake. But it was. Was it? Has it been? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. They said it wasn't real pretty quickly. Oh, okay. I thought they were like, this is. But see, that's even the Mexican government. They did something.

Yeah. You know what I mean? I'm on board with it. I'm on board with it. I'm on board with the fact that they had some fun and we saw where our money went to and it went to pay. And it could have probably used a better, more money to pay for a better, the one that would have lasted. A better fake body. Yeah. Than what they did. So I'd be disappointed if I was a Mexican that my tax money went to such a bad body. Yeah.

They learn from it. Yeah. I think your taxes should go to some pretty fun stuff. Yeah. You should be able to see some stuff. See some results. I like it. Yeah. Throw us a surprise party every year. Yeah. Don't tell us the date. Everybody gets one. Everybody gets one. Everybody gets his day off. We tell you a week before. Yeah. Mm-hmm.

And it floats around. You never know what it is, but man, you're happy when it's, I like that. Yeah. You get a call the next morning. Yeah. Do some stuff like that. A lot. You know, let's clean some, do some housework, clean some stuff up. Yeah.

I think it's a great idea. I love it. All right. I'm going to go ahead and say Nate's not here next week, but I'm saving the comments for when Nate's back. Oh yeah. I'm not following the sword for this one. Yeah. I want, yeah, yeah, yeah. Wait for the, yeah, I won't be here. So yeah. Yeah. Safe. Yeah. You really get some, we can go comment heavy. If you've got some good ones. I think that's going to happen whether we like it or not. Yeah. And remember, I don't, we're, uh, none of this matters. None of this matters. It does. We don't, I don't mean anything. Yeah.

Yeah, you're just riffing. Just riffing. We didn't write this stuff. Well, Brian wrote some stuff down, but the rest of us didn't write anything down. I spent all week researching. Yeah, but we didn't. We didn't write anything. We're writing this down. This is stuff we believe in our hearts so much that we say it off the dome. Yeah. That's funny that you do. You're like, we didn't write it down. This is just what we believe. This is unfiltered who we are. Yeah. I can't.

This is just stuff I think about all day, every day. You can't blame me for this. It's not my fault. Yeah. It was fun. All right. I will be in...

Knoxville. All right. Well, Evans, Georgia, Knoxville, and then, yeah, Knoxville. I'm a big fan of Knoxville. Yeah. I like that city. It is a good city. And then, so I'm excited. Now, yeah, Knoxville. Then I got Atlanta, Tampa. Maybe something else. Some other Savannah, maybe. Savannah, Georgia, maybe.

I think you are in Savannah. Yeah. And then I am in Savannah. Yeah. And then, yeah, that might be it for the year. No, I got no, the rescheduled shows. So John Augustine's wedding. Yeah. Our first guest on the podcast, John Augustine's getting married this week. Yep. He's doing it. So, yeah, I got for December, I got mostly just company Christmas parties. So yeah.

but you guys can't come to them. Yeah. Like you're going to them. I'm performing that though. I'm not just showing up. You know he's working. Crashing. Just letting y'all know I'm working. Yeah. A lot of company. Hey, look at how baits come in. Make,

Making the money. Walks in. They ask you to act like you should play a character that walks in and goes, did you see all the deer out there? I saw a naked man walking by. And then they go, Brian Bates, everybody. He goes, how you doing, folks? Or maybe dress up as a soccer player. See how long. See if you could blend in with the company.

Oh, you could do that easily. I know. But you got to walk in and just see how long it takes before they realize you're a comedian. That might even be after your show. They still don't. I don't know. Sorry. Just a mean speech. Yeah. They go, I don't. This guy. That guy's just one of the more confident workers we have. Mm-hmm.

that he wants to share about his personal life. Why would we care? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Had a baby late and they're like, why would anybody want to hear about bonuses? Why is this man that works with us talking? Yeah.

I got a big week coming up tonight. I'm in Charlotte, North Carolina at the Comedy Zone. Thursday, I'm in Greensboro, North Carolina at the Comedy Zone. Friday, Saturday, I'm in Greenville, South Carolina at the Comedy Zone. That's a great run. Sunday night, I'm going to finish it off in Charleston, South Carolina at the Sparrow, which is in North Charleston. So...

Seven shows this week. Great run through the Carolinas. I know. I'm going through the Carolinas. I'm pumped. That's fun. All right. Well, Thursday I'll be at CB Live in Phoenix, Arizona, and then I'll be at the weekend, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, at the Tempe Improv. Yeah. Great club. It's going to be hot. Nice. Yeah, Tempe's great. All right. That's it. Look, as always, we love you. You know.

We care for you. I care for you. Aaron cares about your future, future, future children and only them. And he looks at you as if you're in the way of him getting to the kids you can't even imagine having.

but I care about you and only you. If you remember one thing from this podcast, take that away. Yeah. One second. I want to show you one more thing. Hello, fresh. What's incredible. That's incredible. Lauren just sent me this. Oh, that's the new logo. We got it in the no show and some lake. Well, we got to be slars now. We got to change. We'll change. What is ASL and some lake stuff?

ASL is sign language too. Yeah. That's great. That's a great logo. But I don't mind that too. No so and then ASL. And some lake stuff. Yeah. ASLS. But I mean, we are getting a little. So slars. Yeah.

Under that. Some lake and river stuff. A bit too many stars for me, but we could do more water. Maybe that's the fish. Those are air bubbles. She made this now while she was working. Now it's so good. You could have been carrying the homeless over there.

She could have done a lot of stuff over there, but this is what she was doing. So, uh, no, that's awesome. All right. I love it. No. So, uh, yeah, we love you. Uh, promise you that, uh, have a great, I do. Yeah, me too. Do you? Uh, all right. Uh, we love you. See you next week. I won't, but then the next week after I'll see you after that. And y'all can tell me all your stuff. Yeah. All right. Bye.

Nate Land is produced by Nate Land Productions and by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife, Laura, on the Audio Boom platform. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land Podcast. eBay Motors is here for the ride. Remember when you first saw the potential?

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