Character Development in God w/ Sarah Jakes Roberts
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Welcome, welcome, welcome to another exciting episode of the Trap Nerds Podcast. This is not an episode. I'm pretty sure this is a promo. You know what it is. We in this piece. Trap nerds, trap nerds. Real n****s like you never heard.

We're giving you reliable gaming news with the best movie and TV reviews from a Blur perspective. All things inside and out of Blur culture. Listen to the Trap Nurse Podcast on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

What's good? It's Colleen Witt and Eating While Broke is back for season three. Brought to you by the Black Effect Podcast Network and iHeartRadio. We're serving up some real stories and life lessons from people like Van Lathan, DC Youngfly, Bone Thugs-N-Harmony, and many more.

They're sharing the dishes that got them through their struggles and the wisdom they gained along the way. We're cooking up something special, so tune in every Thursday. Listen to Eating While Broke on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Presented by State Farm. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Yo, it's Big Bank. Check out my podcast, Prospective with Bank, on the Black Effect Podcast Network. Each and every Monday, Prospective with Bank podcasts will feature individuals, all walks of life, who come together to share their unique perspective and engage in enlightened conversation. This podcast will explore all type of conversations from everyday people, your favorite celebrities. Every Monday, listen to Prospective with Bank on Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple

Presented by AT&T. Connecting changes everything.

Hi, I'm Katie Lowes. And I'm Guillermo Diaz. And we're the hosts of Unpacking the Toolbox, the Scandal Rewatch podcast where we're talking about all the best moments of the show. Mesmerizing. But also, we get to hang out with all of our old Scandal friends like Bellamy Young, Scott Foley, Tony Goldwyn, Debbie Allen, Kerry Washington. Well, suit up, gladiators. Grab your big old glass of wine and prepare yourselves for an even more behind-the-scenes Scandal.

stories with unpacking the toolbox listen to unpacking the toolbox on the iHeartRadio app Apple podcast or wherever you get your podcasts can you maintain your character when life isn't going the way you plan I did not wait until I felt secure to follow what God called me to do our faithfulness is tested in the way that we respond to the things that seem inconsequential is your faithfulness going to end at the point of conflict or are you willing to go down with the ship

What's up, what's up? This is Sarah Jakes Roberts. You are listening to another episode of the Woman Evolved Podcast. I am so grateful to be back at the desk with you. How are you? It is March.

We are still celebrating women's history. So excited about all of the posts that I am seeing on social media. Friday, we had International Women's Day, and I am just so full from seeing women honoring other women, seeing the fellas get in, honoring other women as well. So what's up to you?

ladies, I hope that you are doing something so fresh, so new, so innovative for you, for your family, for your community, that it will one day be historical. And just for the record, that could be as simple as taking a little nap. Baby napping in a world where they say we got to keep on hustling is historical.

Don't feel the pressure to make history. Just be yourself. And I bet you're going to do something historical. How are you? What is going on in your world? Let me tell you. So I am in and out of the gym, in and out, in and out, in and out. I

I did two weeks strong. My legs are sore. Next week is spring break. Here's my problem. If I do not do one specific workout, I do no working out at all. And I'm trying to break that curse. I'm trying to break that curse off of my life. So I'm going out of town for spring break with my girls. And I have every intention of packing a jump rope, doing a little body weight video online. I have to stay in shape. I cannot keep starting from ground zero. It is showing up in my body and I do not enjoy it.

What are you all up to? What's happening in your world? What's happening in your internet, in your web? I'm trying to think. Oh my gosh. Okay, so let's just catch up. I watched Risa Tisa on TikTok. I watched her show. I watched the series. I binge watched it, had it in my ear, played it from the playlist. I know some of y'all say, I don't have time. I don't have time. You

You all are not more responsible than us. Maybe a little bit, maybe a little better, maybe a little bit more responsible. But let me tell you, it was quite the story. I was very intrigued. I like most of you, like when I saw it and I saw it was 50 parts, I was like, there is absolutely positively no reason why this needed to be 50 plus parts long. There's no reason for it. Baby, when she got finished telling that story, I understood it because I was

would not just want to skim over some of the things that she told in that story. I would want you to know every single... When I say every single detail, I would want you to know every single detail because there are just some things that are like, you would not believe what I went through. You wouldn't believe it if I told it to you. So big ups to her, lots of things happening in her world, in her life. And I just love to see...

A woman living out fully what the enemy meant for evil, God meant for good. Like, period. I don't even know. Like, I don't know what she was... Well, I do know what she was doing. I think she worked for...

parole or in the correction office, let me tell you something. I don't know if she realized how gifted she was as a storyteller, as a writer. Maybe she did, but she didn't have a pathway to get there. When she got finished telling this story, I just believe that there was so much affirmation in gifts and talents and opportunities that God knew all along. I tell this story all the time about

When I was pregnant as a teenager and somebody came up to me and they told me, I always knew to expect something like this out of you. And your girl was devastated. I was just like, what energy am I giving off? What's wrong with me that this is something that people would expect from me? It made me question myself. It made me doubt myself. And even as I began to

really develop a relationship with Jesus, really begin to seek righteousness and to get my life together, you know, I still wondered like, am I good enough that that no longer exists? Like, have I gotten to a space where that no longer exists? I started Woman Evolve and I'm like, okay, I started Woman Evolve. But like, I don't know if that, like, am I, whoever that was, where someone looked at me and expected something like that from me, like, am I still that girl?

And when I was worshiping, why am I talking? Okay, yeah. When I was worshiping right before the very first time Woman Evolve ever went on tour, I was feeling all of the inadequacy, all of the feelings of just insecurity and instability. And just for the record, I was going anyway. The tour was planned. It was already out there. I did not wait until I felt secure to follow what God called me to do.

I did it unsure because there was something undeniable that was happening whenever I preached, whenever I shared my heart for God with women. There was something just undeniable where people left and they were like, I want to know who God is. I want to trust God. I want to get back connected with Jesus. Like something was happening that was beyond how I felt. And so I was going on tour.

to create these environments anyway, is I'm worshiping. I'm like, God, Jesus, Holy Spirit, all of y'all come here. Let me talk to you real fast because I just don't feel like I'm the girl who can say anything to these girls. Like, I just don't feel like I have what it takes.

And in my worship, I just heard God say, I always knew to expect something like this from you. And those words have taken on a brand new meaning for me. And there is something so powerful about us getting to a space where what the enemy meant for evil, God shows us all along the way, I meant it for good.

Here's a little secret. Most smartphone deals aren't that exciting. To be honest, they're barely worth mentioning. But then there's AT&T and their best deals. Those are quite exciting. They're the kind of deals that are worth talking about, like their deal on the Samsung Galaxy Z Flip 6.

With this amazing deal, you can trade in your eligible smartphone any year, any condition for a new Samsung Galaxy Z Flip 6. It's so good, in fact, it'll have you shouting from the rooftops. So get yourself down to street level and learn how to snag the new Samsung Galaxy Z Flip 6 on AT&T and maybe grab a ladder on the way home.

AT&T. Connecting changes everything. Requires trading of Galaxy S, Note, or Z series smartphone. Limited time offer. 256 gigabytes for $0. Additional fees, terms, and restrictions apply. See att.com slash Samsung or visit an AT&T store for details.

Hi, I'm Katie Lowes. And I'm Guillermo Diaz. And now we're back with another season of our podcast, Unpacking the Toolbox, where Guillermo and I will be rewatching the show. To officially unpack season three of Scandal. Unpredictable. You don't see it coming. It's a wild, wild ride. The twists and turns in season three. Mesmerizing. But also,

Also, we get to hang out with all of our old Scandal friends like Bellamy Young, Scott Foley, Tony Goldwyn, Debbie Allen, Kerry Washington. So many people. Even more shocking assassinations from Papa and Mama Pope. And yes, Katie and I's famous teeth pulling scene that kicks off a romance. And it was peak TV. This is new Scandal KCBQ.

content for your eyes, for your ears, for your hearts, for your minds. Well, suit up gladiators, grab your big old glass of wine and prepare yourselves for even more behind the scenes. Listen to unpacking the toolbox on the I heart radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Meet the real woman behind the tabloid headlines in a personal podcast that delves into the life of the notorious Tori Spelling as she takes us through the ups and downs of her sometimes glamorous, sometimes chaotic life and marriage. I don't think he knew how big it would be, how big the life I was given and live is.

I think he was like, oh, yeah, things come and go. But with me, it never came and went. Is she Donna Martin or a down-and-out divorcee? Is she living in Beverly Hills or a trailer park? In a town where the lines are blurred, Tori is finally going to clear the air in the podcast Misspelling.

When a woman has nothing to lose, she has everything to gain. I just filed for divorce. Whoa. I said the words that I've said like in my head for like 16 years. Wild. Listen to Miss Spelling on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Welcome to Cheaters and Backstabbers. I'm Shadi Diaz. And I'm Kate Robards. And we are New York City stand-up comedians and best friends. And we love a good cheating and backstabbing story. So this is a series where our guests reveal their most shocking cheating stories. Join us as we learn how to avoid getting our hearts broken or our backs slashed. Listen to Cheaters and Backstabbers on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts.

I'm Angie Martinez. Check out my podcast where I talk to some of the biggest athletes, musicians, actors in the world. We go beyond the headlines and the soundbites to have real conversations about real life, death, love, and everything in between. This life right here, just finding myself, just relaxation, just not feeling stressed, just not feeling pressed. This is what I'm most proud of. I'm proud of Mary because I've been through hell and some horrible things.

That feeling that I had of inadequacy is gone. You're going to die being you. So you got to constantly work on who you are to make sure that the stars align correctly.

Life ain't easy and it's getting harder and harder. So if you have a story to tell, if you come through some trials, you need to share it because you're going to inspire someone. You're going to give somebody the motivation to not give up, to not quit. Listen to Angie Martinez IRL on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. When we truly begin to recognize that there are two intentions running at the same time,

It helps us to understand that even though there is one plan that is more visible, there is another plan working. You know, maybe it's undercover, maybe it's under the radar. Oof. I got chills even thinking that, like, ugh. Okay, so, you know, I don't know if you guys watch, like,

The little action, the little action of everything. Everything going to be little for me. I don't know why that little, little, little, little. Anyways, some little action movies where there's like this intense mission going on. And the only way that they can survive the mission is if they start flying under the radar. There are moments where God's plan and the enemy's plan are taking turns unnoticed.

under the radar. And sometimes what we see so clearly is the enemy's plan. We see the way that he's seeking to kill, steal, and destroy our lives. We see the way that we have been damaged, broken, and abused. We see the way that we have eaten from forbidden fruit and can't access God or feel so ashamed that we can never experience his presence in the way that we were intending to

And yet all while that is happening, there is also the reality that God's plan is flying under the radar. Our job in really having faith in God's plan for our life is to get to a place where we trust that even though we can't see it, that God's plan is working under the radar. And I feel like what we experienced with Risa Tisa was this radical swap.

of all of a sudden God's plan throughout her whole experience that was working underneath the radar is now so visible. When you have access to moments like this, whether it's your moment or another moment or someone else's moment, you have to be willing to take note at how God works. She was going through all of that stuff. Even when she told the video,

She reminded me of myself because she's like, listen, there's nothing you can call me that I haven't said to myself. So she has bought into the enemy's narrative about who she is. And now my prayer for her is that she will buy into God's narrative about who she is, that I still have a plan for you, that I still have good plans.

available to you, that there is still an opportunity through your testimony for you to experience healing and growth and development. We have to make sure that we are allowing God's plan to speak as loudly and as clearly as the enemy's plan, because he got a microphone.

It's giving megaphone out here. And God's plan is sometimes a whisper until it becomes so loud, so undeniable that we have no choice but to surrender to becoming powerful in God. It's one thing to become powerful in your own strength, in your own might, because someone else gave you influence. It is another thing to become powerful in God. And when we become powerful in God, it may not be as visible as us becoming powerful in

and our own strength and our own talent. But when it does become visible, there is no denying on a soul level that God is with you and God is for you. That was a long intro. Usually I just check in on y'all, but we was catching up. I was telling y'all about recent teeth. I was trying to figure out what else was going on on the internet. I can't remember. Y'all leave Shannon Sharp alone. Uh,

I have to see what else I be on TikTok for research. OK, I'm on TikTok for research. I am not on TikTok because I have nothing else to do as a responsible podcast host. I consider it my duty to understand what is going on on the interweb. All right. Y'all already know what it is. We are going to have a little question. First of all, the question isn't little. It's a long question. And you know what? I like it.

Because when I say I want to mind your business, I mean, I want to mind all of it. Send me your question to podcast at woman evolve.com. I love to hear your voice. I love it when you send it to me in a video and I have an opportunity to see your face, to see your hand movements while you're telling me this story. But I know some of you all are like, I want you to mind my business, but mind your business at the same time. And in that case, you can send me an email. When you send me the email, I will not.

not mention your name. You can send that email to podcast at woman evolve.com and you can tell it like a T I is and I will share with you what I know in the multitude of counsel. There is wisdom. So I'll share mine. Maybe someone else will write in and respond if you have a similar situation or they have some wisdom or insight that I missed email it to me podcast at woman evolve.com. Let's listen to this week's question.

Since November, my best friend and I haven't spoken because of a party that she wanted to have for Christmas. Before I get into the detail, at one point we both had all of the same friends, which was only five of us. When I entered my second year of college, I backed away from everyone because I realized that I no longer needed to be surrounded by them and it served me no purpose. Everyone is cordial, no drama or anything. We just no longer communicate.

So the only person that I communicated with was my best friend. We've been best friends for over five years now. Long story short, she got mad that I didn't want to attend a party. Petty, right? Because I didn't want to be uncomfortable in that situation surrounded by four other people I no longer speak with and haven't had a full conversation with in like two years now.

In another message she sent, she said,

I felt like that alone told me all that I needed to know. Everything that I've tried to do with her and the friend group back then for fun and for success was always talked about, but moves never happen. And sometimes everyone would be together and I would be the only one who was told nothing about it whatsoever. I guess her seeing that I do things with the people I've met in college made her feel a certain way. It is crazy that I was called unsupportive because I've

always been the only one who was always there for her in every obstacle. My response was, if you don't want to accept the fact that certain environments are no longer for me, then I don't know what to tell you. She responded, it is what it is. I don't care no more. It has now been three months since I last spoke to her. And before this situation, I kept getting this feeling that God was preparing me for a new season. I started letting go of a lot of things and backing away from people. I'm only 20 years old and I feel like this area that I'm in is a part of me growing. I

I've always been really mature for my age and God is allowing me to see things for what they are and not what I want them to be. I've never been the type to not make moves when it comes to my success because I know that I am on a mission so I can't just talk about things and sit around like it's going to come to me. I have to do what God is telling me ever since I've backed away from so much.

I've changed in so many ways. I'm not the same person that I used to be. I don't hold the same conversations that I used to hold. I'm growing. So I know that if I'm not around people who are doing the same, then this is probably how they would view me as well. But I feel great about this version of myself and my college journey is coming to an end. I've always been a church girl, but being able to actually be in sync as I get older makes situations a

whole lot better there are times when I want to text her because that's my girl but at the same time I get a feeling that's like just leave it alone so Sarah girl what should I do

Friendship breakups are absolutely positively horrible, especially when you are at this stage in your life where you can begin to feel yourself shifting in the direction of more intentionality, of purpose, of getting really serious. And when you begin to shift in that direction and people are not moving at the same rate and the same pace as you're moving in, it can be very challenging, isolating and lonely.

I know this very well. And I think that one of the things that we have to do is really let things be what they are.

We have to be willing to ask ourselves, am I forcing something to be something it's not? Or am I shrinking to fit into something that once was? And if you are shrinking to fit into something that once was, you can maintain the friendship and lose yourself. Or you can dare to stand in the fullness of who you are and risk the friendship changing.

I have to say that in my experience in having circumstances like this, and I have had quite a few, especially from adolescence into my 30s, that one of the things that I had to be careful of was not weaponizing my growth, not using my growth as an excuse to down someone else.

Giving someone else the space to be on a different path at a different pace is something that we do not talk about enough. And while it is true that sometimes people walk away from us and sometimes we have to walk away from people, if we do so thinking that we are somehow better than them, then we end up just becoming prideful instead of compassionate to where they are in their journey.

The reason why I believe that exercise and compassion is important is because at the end of the day, we may be in a situation where we are in the same rooms, where our path is aligning. And just because we can't grow together now doesn't mean that there won't be a season in which we can connect again. And one of the things that I learned is that there were so many instances where I knew that I was broken.

growing in a different direction of someone and made the decision to demonize where they were in order to justify us walking away from one another.

And when I demonize where they were, it didn't make me feel any better. If you really want to get over, get over, quote unquote, a friendship that has no longer that no longer has the ability to serve where you are, then my suggestion is to leave that friendship with gratitude, to be thankful for

for the time that you shared together to honor the role that that person played in your life while also honoring where you are now. And you never go wrong with honor. You do not need to demonize them in order to walk away. And if you have to demonize them in order to walk away, I think it's a sign of immaturity within itself.

to be able to say, you know what, I really did need that friendship. It helped me survive college. It helped me get through this. And that person was a good friend to me then. But for who I am now, that friendship no longer serves me. To say goodbye with respect and honor is the greatest gift that we can give that person as an individual and child of God, while also honoring our growth.

It's not always easy, but when you create boundaries, you begin to really understand who is supportive of your growth and who is just not a good fit for you right now. And it takes a lot of courage to identify that and make a decision based off of what you see.

Many of us, we identify it, but we don't make decisions based off of what we see. And we just end up internalizing the knowing that something is no longer for us. And then just move on pretending as opposed to activating what we know. And you cannot reasonably expect for God to give you more.

more clarity, more vision, more direction when you don't already move on what he's given you as a knowing. Our obedience is not just saying, God, yes, I'll do whatever you tell me to do. But God, I will pay attention to the knowings that you put in my spirit and I will make decisions and I will adjust according to what I know.

And I feel like that's something that many of us could benefit from activating even more. I was just about to send a message. I was going to screenshot a message that came to me and send it to someone else. And I just thought the Holy Spirit just be like, don't do it. And it seems like it's so small and so minuscule like this message.

doesn't have anything to do with a sermon. It has nothing to do with ministry, but what it does have to do with is me being obedient, even to the things that don't seem like they matter. You may not believe that, you know, you pretending to still get along with someone who you know is diminishing your growth or you pretending to say yes to something when you really want to say no is a big deal in the grand scheme of things. But we are tested. Our faithfulness is tested.

and the ways that we respond to the things that seem inconsequential. If you are faithful over a few things, I'll make you ruler over many. This is not just about the acquisition of things, but about the character connected to the little things that God has given us. And so we have an opportunity every day to exercise the type of character required for where God is taking us.

Sometimes it's not the lack of God having somewhere to take you or the lack of having a purpose or the lack of having gifts or talents, but do you have the character and does it show up in the small things or are you going to activate the character once you get to the big moments? And so I think it's very admirable that you are activating the character that you need now for where God is taking you. And in the perfect world, everyone would adjust to that activation, but not everyone is willing to do that.

And so you take the hard, lonely road of transitioning. And as you transition, do it with respect and honor, keeping your heart open to the ways that that person can grow and the ways that God could bring someone else in your life. Evolve.

Here's a little secret. Most smartphone deals aren't that exciting. To be honest, they're barely worth mentioning. But then there's AT&T and their best deals. Those are quite exciting. They're the kind of deals that are really worth talking about. Like their deal on the new Samsung Galaxy Z Flip 6. Which is a great deal.

With this amazing deal, you can trade in your eligible smartphone any year, any condition for a new Samsung Galaxy Z Flip 6. It's so good. In fact, it will have you shouting from the rooftop. So get yourself down to the street level and learn how to snag the new Samsung Galaxy Z Flip 6 on AT&T and maybe grab a ladder on the way home. AT&T, connecting changes everything.

Requires trade-in of Galaxy S, Note, or Z Series smartphone. Limited time offer. 256GB for $0. Additional fees, terms, and restrictions apply. See att.com slash Samsung or visit an AT&T store for details.

Hi, I'm Katie Lowes. And I'm Guillermo Diaz. And now we're back with another season of our podcast, Unpacking the Toolbox, where Guillermo and I will be rewatching the show. To officially unpack season three of Scandal. Unpredictable. You don't see it coming. It's a wild, wild ride. The twists and turns in season three. Mesmerizing. But also,

Also, we get to hang out with all of our old Scandal friends like Bellamy Young, Scott Foley, Tony Goldwyn, Debbie Allen, Kerry Washington. So many people. Even more shocking assassinations from Papa and Mama Pope. And yes, Katie and I's famous teeth pulling scene that kicks off a romance. And it was peak TV. This is new Scandal content.

content for your eyes, for your ears, for your hearts, for your minds. Well, suit up, gladiators. Grab your big old glass of wine and prepare yourselves for even more behind the scenes. Listen to Unpacking the Toolbox on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Meet the real woman behind the tabloid headlines in a personal podcast that delves into the life of the notorious Tori Spelling as she takes us through the ups and downs of her sometimes glamorous, sometimes chaotic life and marriage. I don't think he knew how big it would be, how big the life I was given and live is.

I think he was like, oh, yeah, things come and go. But with me, it never came and went. Is she Donna Martin or a down-and-out divorcee? Is she living in Beverly Hills or a trailer park? In a town where the lines are blurred, Tori is finally going to clear the air in the podcast Misspelling. When a woman has nothing to lose, she has everything to gain. I just filed for divorce. Whoa. I said the words.

That I've said like in my head for like 16 years. Wild. Listen to Misspelling on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to Cheaters and Backstabbers. I'm Shadi Diaz. And I'm Kate Robards. And we are New York City stand-up comedians and best friends. And we love a good cheating and backstabbing story.

So this is a series where our guests reveal their most shocking cheating stories. Join us as we learn how to avoid getting our hearts broken or our backs slashed. Listen to Cheaters and Backstabbers on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts.

I'm Angie Martinez. Check out my podcast where I talk to some of the biggest athletes, musicians, actors in the world. We go beyond the headlines and the soundbites to have real conversations about real life, death, love, and everything in between. This life right here, just finding myself, just relaxation, just not feeling stressed, just not feeling pressed. This is what I'm most proud of. I'm proud of Mary because I've been through hell and some horrible things.

That feeling that I had of inadequacy is gone. You're going to die being you. So you got to constantly work on who you are to make sure that the stars align correctly.

Life ain't easy and it's getting harder and harder. So if you have a story to tell, if you've come through some trials, you need to share it because you're going to inspire someone. You're going to give somebody the motivation to not give up, to not quit. Listen to Angie Martinez IRL on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Like so many of you, I grew up in church. Some of you did not grow up in church, but you grew up around it. I will tell you that part of my experience in church, and mind you, when I was growing up, it was part of the height of the purity culture. So everything was kind of about like,

performative relationship with God. You do the right thing all of the time. If you can't do the right thing all of the right time, then you do not have as much worth or value as other people, especially as it relates to your body. As it relates to your body, how you carry yourself, there was a desire to be this person who was pretty, I'm going to say blameless,

And constantly, I won't even say pursuing righteousness because like the idea was like they had already arrived and they had achieved it.

I did not fit in in church because I kind of knew like, listen, I'm trying to figure out how you do this thing. Like, how do you even get to a place where that is your experience? How do you get to a place where you are living blamelessly and righteously? And no one was really explaining it, or at least maybe I wasn't paying attention, but no one was really explaining it. It just seemed like either you get it or you don't.

took many years to finally learn that character is something that is developed. It's not necessarily something that you just get. I think part of why I am such a advocate, I guess, for gentle parenting is because even the idea that you do something wrong, you get a whooping and you're not supposed to do it again is a little performative. At least it was for me. Let me speak about my... Let me sweep around my own front porch and

And as a result of it being performative for me, I never learned why what I did was wrong. And I never felt a conviction necessarily to do right as much as I was like, I'm either not going to do it again because I don't want to whoop him, which I think was the goal, or I'm going to do it differently next time instead of the challenge of...

this is not the kind of person you want to become. A person who makes these types of decisions are X, Y, and Z. And these are the types of relationships that they lose and the type of people they attract because character is so important. We wasn't breaking it down. And so, as I said, many years for me to get to a place where I'm like, okay, I need to have character development for myself so that I

Understand the value of integrity, of honesty, of loyalty, of, you know,

communicating in a way that makes a person feel safe and being a safe place where someone's secrets are safe with me. That was something that was developed for me. It wasn't something that I just got naturally. And maybe it's just me, but that's a part of my experience, creating a space for other people to be vulnerable. All of that was developed through character development.

And so if you are in a position where you are constantly undergoing the process of character development, I want you to know, one, you are not on your own. Secondly, I want to encourage you to be intentional about understanding what type of person you want to be.

You know, as I'm talking all about power moves, I'm reading it, I'm constantly consuming it and just trying to figure out how do I continue to unpack everything that God gave me when God gave me this book.

But part of it really was just this practical guide to developing characters so that you can show up in the world in a way that gives you confidence. And our character is developed through submission to the Holy Spirit. So when we talk about what type of person you want to be, what are the values of the person you desire to be?

I will give you an example. As a mother, I guess I want to be easy to talk to, but I also want to be committed to telling the truth.

I want to be a parent who can apologize. I want to be vulnerable with my children about the choices and decisions that I made. I want to help them understand why they may be making some of the decisions that they have made. And so that requires dialogue and intentionality.

And what's wild is as a teen mom, you know, raising a kid at 14 versus raising kids at 35 is obviously completely different because at 14, I was just doing what I thought I was supposed to do. Tapping that Laffy Taffy, yelling if necessary, and

And my child, you know, very respectful, loves me very much. Yes, ma'am. No, ma'am. All of those things. And yet, like, he doesn't ask me for anything. I can remember when he was maybe in middle school and I looked at his shoes. I was like, are your shoes too small? And he was like, yes, ma'am. I just didn't want to ask you for anything. I had trained him to think similarly to the way that I think that I was raised and that your needs matter.

And no matter how legitimate they are, could be an inconvenience. So if you could just keep them to yourself, unless absolutely necessary, that would be ideal. And so now even in his 20s, I'm constantly asking him, not necessarily just what do you need, but how did that make you feel? And making sure that I am creating a space where he can tell me what he needs without judgment. And so...

Those are some of the things that I want to hold near to me as I seek to be a mother that moves in power for my children. And who I am as a mother, though there is certainly overlap, may be different than who I am as a businesswoman. As a businesswoman, I want to be direct. I want to be clear. I want to be concise. I want to be compassionate. I want to maintain a boundary of

And so as a businesswoman, I'm having to navigate how does that show up in my decision making? The problem is there is who we want to be, but then there is who we are in the moment. When it's time for me to actually activate those things, how do I make sure that as a parent, I'm not tapping back into what feels normal and culturally acceptable for me? And how do I make sure that my actions align with my desire?

and that I am showing up in the way that I have consulted God and come away with as my blueprint for an existence that looks more like Him.

If as parents, we are the closest reflection to God, our children first experience, what precedent do I want to set for their relationship with God? And am I taking that seriously? That is part of what I asked myself. I was looking in Job 1 and part of the reason why I was looking in Job 1 is because Job was not just chosen because of

Job wasn't just chosen as some random person in the Bible. Job was chosen because he was blameless and upright and one who feared God and shunned evil. As a matter of fact, one of the titles within Job 1 says Satan attacks Job's character.

And so Satan attacks Job's character. He says, have you considered that Satan is roaming to and fro looking for someone that he may devour? And the Lord says, have you tried my servant Job? And

The Satan said, no, okay. The Lord says to Satan, have you considered my servant Job, that there is none like him on the earth, a blameless and upright man, one who fears God and shuns evil. And Satan answered, the Lord says, does Job fear God for nothing? Have you not made a hedge around him and around his household and around all that he has on every side? You have blessed the work of his hands and his possessions have increased in the land, but now stretch out your hand and touch all that he has and he will surely curse you to your face. The enemy...

attacks what Job possesses, but the attack was really on his character. The Lord says to Satan, behold, all that he has is in your power. Only do not lay a hand on his person. Oh, this is so good to me. When I want to, I begin on my own nerves. I want to say this the way I hear it in my head.

When the Lord says, but do not attack his person, the Lord is saying that you can attack anything around him, but keep his person intact, who he is as a person you cannot touch.

But the enemy is of the philosophy that if I touch what they possess, then I will touch the person and that person will end up cursing you. And I think it just shows us the difference in how God thinks. I'm thinking about that analogy about the enemy meant it for evil, God meant it for good.

The difference between how the enemy is looking and how God is looking, when Satan is looking for a way to attack Job, he is looking for something that will ultimately affect his character. Because if your character can be impacted, then you will no longer be the person who can be faithful over what God has given you. Can you maintain your character or

When life isn't going the way you planned, can you maintain your character when you're losing friends? Can you maintain your character when you are under attack? Man, I'm thinking the beginning of this year,

We were under such attack and I wanted to hide. I wanted to quit. And I was, you're talking about going back and forth with the Lord. I was like, Lord Jesus, ooh, this may be the end for your dog. Like she just got up here. Maybe it's time for homegirl to sit down. And, you know, I felt like God really challenged me. Like, are you only going to be faithful once?

When it seems like things are protected, when it feels like things are on the rise, when it feels like you're checking all of the boxes, you did everything right and you still experience calamity, is your faithfulness going to end at the point of conflict or are you willing to go down with the ship?

Because I've been faithful to you because you trust me. Because you know that if I allow this to happen, then it must be because it needed to come down or it can't come down. Like, are you going to ride with me on that level? And I got breakthrough and my break, God be talking crazy to me. I got breakthrough. My breakthrough basically came. I told my husband, I'm going down with the ship.

Like who says that? Like I'm supposed to come out with something so inspiring, so encouraging, but I was so settled in this, like I'm going down with the ship. Like I meant it. Like why?

I don't want to say Titanic me, but like I'm going down with the ship. You know what I mean? Like, God, if I am on this boat, you called me to it. I had confirmation. I didn't ask for it. You allowed me to be in this position. And now the very place that you place me in, it feels like the sand is sinking me.

I am not going to question whether or not you sent me here because I just saw too many signs. I know too much to turn my back. And if I'm sitting here on sinking sand, then God, I am going to trust that you have something solid in the midst of the sinking or that the sinking is just an illusion. And I have to imagine that that is how Job fell. Not that it didn't hurt him. When we read all of Job, we see that he cried out. He got upset.

He was frustrated. His friends turned his back on him. But when it's all said and done, God ends up restoring. His character stayed intact regardless of what was happening around him. And that's what I want for myself. I want to have so much character that temptation doesn't get me, that calamity doesn't threaten me. And I'm going to have to fight for this. It's not going to come easy. It's not going to come naturally.

But I have decided who I want to be in God. I have decided who I want to be in Jesus. And when I make that decision, I am going to fight to stay in that place. Y'all might have to take this clip and play it for me when life gets hard. And I'm okay with that. You know, you may have to come get me when I'm sinking and when life doesn't look the way that I thought that it would. But I am committed to figuring out how to stay connected with God no matter what.

I am committed to walking this thing out for a lifetime. And I want to encourage you this week as we talk about becoming powerful in God, to not look to become powerful in the media, to become powerful in your community, to become powerful in your church, at your school, to become powerful in a relationship, to become powerful that so much, to become so powerful that it begins to border arrogance, but to become so powerful in God that

that you resemble a life that looks like Jesus, where you become obedient even until the point of death, but ultimately you experience God's glory because you were willing to become powerful even when it looked like you were maybe weak on the outside or under attack, that you stay committed. That faithfulness,

is the faithfulness that we experience from God. And I feel like, you know, Paul says it is our reasonable service to return that level of faithfulness. And I am telling you, when I look at the Bible and I look at what those people went through in scripture, like none of it looked easy. None of it looked easy. I don't know why.

We got to this place where we were just like, this thing is going to be easy. Like there's nothing that suggests that it's not going to be hard, that it's not going to break you into a thousand pieces. And so you probably want to like, child, then why? Because I want to be on the right side of history.

I want to maintain the faithfulness that God has exhibited towards me. And there is nothing more powerful than God's glory being able to show up in your life to partner with God in such a way that makes God tangible for other people. It is my profound belief that it is the only thing that will actually make the world a better place. And so why do we stay faithful? Because faithful is the...

Faithful is the gateway for glory. Faithful is the gateway for encountering God's presence. And since you're going to be in someone's presence, like we're going to be in the presence of anxiety. We're going to be in the presence of depression. We're going to be in the presence of evil. Anytime we turn on the headlines that Lord knows is evil all over the world. Like we are going to be in the presence of something. Why not be in the presence of God? And because God has asked to dwell with you, among you, inside of you.

Why not maintain your ability to tap into the presence of God, regardless of what other presence are around and allow that to edify you and to become what you are committed to. So character development.

begins in our relationship with God. It begins in us really understanding who we want to be in God and living that out loud. And when we begin to make those choices and decisions to live out who we want to be in God, it changes our life. It shifts us. We align with other people who are on a similar journey.

I preached a message, a mirror and a model. It's on YouTube. If you haven't seen it, go check it out. It really begins to break down even further this notion of our spirit being a reflection of God's image. And when our spirit is a reflection of God's image, it's a reflection of God's image.

it should show up in the way that we speak to people. It should show up in the way that we create. It should show up in our humility. It should show up in the way that we are confident because we are made in the image of God. It doesn't mean I always have to get things right. It means that I can apologize. And when I get them right, I can celebrate. Like, it's just beautiful to have a spirit that you can tell is aligned with something that is so much bigger than you. It is humbling and it is just transformative.

So, we're going to be talking, as you can imagine, about becoming powerful, what it means, what it doesn't mean, shedding definitions of pseudo power so that we can lay hold of God's divinity in our life. And I am excited to be your companion.

on this journey. If you have not, please pre-order my book, Power Moves, Ignite Your Confidence and Become a Force. I ask myself over and over again, like, how do I break this down? How do I break this down into bite-sized pieces that are within reach and tangible for the reader? And I believe that God's given me such rich wisdom and insight on how to get it done.

I'm going to see if I can get PT on the podcast next week so we can talk about becoming powerful in a relationship, becoming powerful as a unit without losing your individuality. I just feel like there's so much that we can unpack and I would love to unpack it with you. So I will talk to you next week. I love you so bad, which is my daughter's got me saying that y'all pray for me. I am raising an alpha. She's an alpha. Oh,

Y'all pray for me. I hope you have an amazing week. Let's pray before we go. Man, character. Okay, before I pray, I just want to say this. A lot of us have taken on the character of our culture, our environment. And as opposed to character being something that relates to our morality and our ethics, character has become how we play a role in environments and situations that no longer serve us.

I want to challenge you to no longer be a character, but to have character. If there is an area in your life where you are stuck in a role that makes everyone else happy, everyone else comfortable, but you have no character within. You have no boundaries. You have no sense of what's right or what's wrong. You have no sense of balance.

integrity to what God has called you to do, but you have the comfort of other people's acceptance, I want to challenge you to at least define what it would look like to have character. Once you have created that definition, let's pray about how we take what we have and allow it to flow into who we are. Holy Spirit, thank you.

Thank you for giving us a guide, for recognizing that we needed more than just clever ideas, that we needed someone who could walk this thing out for us. So like my mother said when I was a little girl, thank you God for Jesus. As we prepare to go about our day, God, I pray that you would highlight for my friend the areas where they need to experience growth and development.

that you would do it in such a way that it doesn't make them feel shame, but rather hungry. Hungry for your power, hungry for your spirit, hungry for your love to lead them, guide them, and direct them.

And as they begin to lean into the direction of that growth, God, I ask that you would show them signs along the way that says, you got this. Keep going. Keep pushing. God's covering you. He's with you. He'll never leave you nor forsake you. I thank you, God, for the opportunity to share what you have done in my life.

to share what I am learning and unpacking about who you are. God, I pray that I've said something today that has added value to your kingdom. The same way that you're highlighting areas of growth for them, do it for me too. I say that with much trepidation because I am stressed and feeling like I have something to do makes me feel even more anxiety. So I pray that when it is highlighted, that I would not shun it or feel shame, but embrace it.

from a place of love, because that's the place in which you are highlighting in. Bless their weak God in all that they do. In Jesus' name, amen. Welcome, welcome, welcome to another exciting episode of the Trap Nerds Podcast. This is not an episode. I'm pretty sure this is a promo. You know what it is. We in this piece. Trap nerds, trap nerds, real n****s like you never heard.

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Hi, I'm Katie Lowes. And I'm Guillermo Diaz. And we're the hosts of Unpacking the Toolbox, the Scandal Rewatch podcast where we're talking about all the best moments of the show. Mesmerizing. But also, we get to hang out with all of our old Scandal friends like Bellamy Young, Scott Foley, Tony Goldwyn, Debbie Allen, Kerry Washington. Well, suit up, gladiators. Grab your big old glass of wine and prepare yourselves for an even more behind-the-scenes Scandal.

I just filed for divorce. Whoa. I said the words that I've said like in my head for like 16 years.

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