Transplant (Season 1, Episode 4)
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Hi, Jennifer Simard. Hi, Patrick Hines. How are you? I'm good. And how are you, Cheesecake? I'm good. Yeah, Cheesecake. Hey, give us a quick get out of here. Get out of here. You're real throaty with it. It's so, it's perfect. Get out of here. Get out of here.

So Cheesecakes, for anybody who's new here, we want to explain the format of the Golden Girls Deep Dive podcast. We're going in order from the beginning of the series. We're doing funny, silly, hilarious recaps of the Golden Girls, everyone's favorite show. But we also have a full-time researcher. So these episodes are dripping with like trivia and gossip based in truth, as I like to say. I'm laughing because dripping sounds...

It's dripping. It's dripping with trivia. And then at the end of each episode, we do a fully researched deep dive into something from the Golden Girls universe. Yeah, and Hot Stuff, you're doing the deep dive today. Why don't you tell the Cheesecakes who you're doing? I am. I'm doing a deep dive on Estelle Getty, who plays Sophia. I'm obsessed. Like, her story is so wild because... It's so inspiring because it could be anything.

anyone. Because she had very little professional acting experience before getting this gig. And the one piece of really professional acting experience she had is monumental. And it's just an amazing, incredible, incredible story. It's just like a wonderful rags to riches story, but someone who's just done the work, you know, and like a meritocracy winning. It's just great. It's really, really good. So yeah, so that's coming at the end of the episode. And also Cheesecake's

Join our Facebook group, okay? It's Golden Girls Deep Dive Podcast Discussion Group. It never starts to roll off the tongue easily. We're going to be on season seven and it's still going to be that hard to say. The Golden Girls Deep Dive Podcast Discussion Group. It's like that line that Dorothy has, could you be a little more specific? I know.

It's true. It doesn't really. No, but it's like we only have episodes once a week. Get into the Facebook group to make friends. Talk about the episodes. Talk about the Golden Girls. Talk about your lives. It's really fun. What are we talking about today, girl? We're talking about episode four, Transplant. Oh, my God. This one comes real early in the series. You know, like we've all watched the series 800 times and like you skip around and you know. Yeah. This is one of the ones that I would get to and like skip. I'm going to say sometimes the Golden Girls struggles when it's on a very special Golden Girls. I know.

You know, and there's definitely great stuff in here. So good. Well, that's what I was going to say was that I kind of was glad that like I was forced to watch it because I was like, oh, this is good. There's really good stuff here. Yes, yes. Well, this originally aired October 5th, 1985, written by Susan Harris and Winifred Harvey, directed by Paul Bogart. There was one significant cultural event that happened the week this episode aired. What was that? It was the death of Hollywood heartthrob Rock Hudson.

And it's significant because he died of AIDS. And I knew that he had told the world that he had AIDS, but I didn't know how long before. It was 11 weeks after his doctors confirmed to the world that he, in fact, did have AIDS. He died. And I was looking into this. He never officially came out. He never... No. And it was...

sort of an unspoken, a known secret in Hollywood. And I just thought of this. I didn't deep dive this at all. But as you're speaking and fact check me, please. But I believe he was doing a guest starring role on Dynasty at the time and he had to kiss Linda Evans. Oh. And I remember at

At the time, there was lots of talk about how the virus could be transmitted or not. In 1985, we were real early. Yeah. That's so interesting. I mean, we know that he was really good friends with the Reagans. And Ronald Reagan famously never said the word AIDS while he was in office. But they said he was one of the biggest stars in the golden age of Hollywood. He was a heartthrob. The women loved him. But he was gay. And he died of AIDS on October 2nd, 1985. The week this episode premiered. Yeah. Way to open with a real downer. Wah, wah, wah.

On a very special Patrick Hines. I was going to say, and your one-one-one sounded a little bit like the Golden Girls transition music. So it's a good transition into the episode. Well, yeah, and you'll notice, Cheesecakes, like we did, that every time there's a serious topic, the transition music changes. It's darker. It's a little more serious and respectful. ♪

So the show opens. We're in the living room. Rose is arranging these yellow flowers. She's on her knees in front of the coffee table, arranging these yellow flowers in truly the ugliest way. And I really stopped to take note of this because I also have absolutely no idea how to arrange flowers. Well, I hear you. I did want to say I appreciated that we changed this camera angle. It

We rarely see, if ever, do we see someone kneeling at the coffee table. So right off the bat, I was in. And I think they're yellow carnations, perhaps, but there was not enough filler foliage. You know, it's a long stem flower. You need to pack in more stuff. You're a long stem flower, Jennifer Simard. Thank you very much. Dorothy Spornack is a long stem flower. I'm actually quite petite. I'm like Blanche. I'm petite. I'm petite.

I've always been petite. Blanche enters. She's absolutely frantic. She, too, is carrying a huge basket of flowers. It suddenly looks like a funeral home. Yeah, it's a large, large flower arrangement. Like he says, the place is a mess. You know, she's beside herself. Because, quote, she's going to be here any minute. Who is she talking about, Jennifer? She's talking about her sister. Yeah.

one of her two sisters. We talk about both of them, even though we only see one of them. Let's talk about what she's wearing for a moment. She's wearing a basic ivory dress that's very nice, but over it is a frilly pink apron. And what did you say to me? I promised you that I was going to wear that frilly pink apron for this recording and nothing else. I've broken that promise due to sexual harassment rules. Did you not like the apron? I did like it. I thought she looked very tasteful. She always does. Her clothes in

this first season. Season one is really good. You know, and there's like a mystery spray can of cleaner on the coffee table. I was trying to make out what the label said. Well, because she's like freaking out because her sister's coming. She says she hates her sister. God, I wish she wasn't coming. I just hate her. I can't believe you hate your sister. I despise her. Oh, I wish I'd gotten a decorator. Nancy Reagan's decorator. That'd kill my sister.

Nancy Reagan's decorator. Yes. And here's a little deep dive, Patrick. Yes. Nancy Reagan, for those listeners who don't know, she was the first lady of President Ronald Reagan. She had their White House, you know, house quarters and their Bel Air home and Century City address all decorated by a man named Ted Graber. Okay. And he happened

to be gay. And he lived with his partner, Archie Case, for 40 years. I love that the Reagans loved the gays but never wanted to come to our defense. Thanks, guys. So hypocritical, right? But anyway, one night, you know, they did stay at the White House. And in 1984, I think it was, the Washington Post posted a piece about that very word hypocrisy, saying Ronald Reagan was called a, quote, closet hypocrite.

tolerant. Yes. Oh, my God. I love that. For allowing Graber and his partner to sleep at the White House. But yes, they did. And I really just hate that, you know, me, not thee. Like, well, he's our friend, but publicly, I'm going to protect my political career. And that was the whole thing with Rock Hudson. That's so topic

for this week because Rock Hudson died the week this episode premiered. They really were awful to the gays. I mean, the Reagan administration famously refused to acknowledge that AIDS even was happening. C. Everett Koop, the attorney general, there's a famous story of him pulling Reagan into a closet being like, girl, we got to talk about this. I thought you were going to say there's a famous story of him pulling him into a closet. Girl, kiss me. No!

If you can imagine, see Everett Coop. He looks like the Kentucky Fried Chicken Colonel. Right, but your setup was so sexy. I know. Girl, come in this closet and... Shh, girl, shh. Don't speak, don't speak, Ronnie. Like his finger over his lip. Don't speak, Ronald. Anyway...

Well, Rose wants to know why Blanche hates her sister. And Blanche explains it's because she made her and her big sister Charmaine's lives miserable. Now, these names, Charmaine, Virginia, and Blanche. I love the name Charmaine. It seems like the name you would name like a fancy dog. Yes, in a Spanish conquistador outfit.

I'm thinking one of those, like, froofy poodles named Charmaine. Charmaine. You know? She's your sister. How can you hate your sister? Because she made me and my big sister Charmaine miserable our entire lives. I never heard of such a thing. You never heard of anybody hating their sister? Never. It's Southern. Sleeping with your brothers is Southern. Now, Sophia enters with, and I wrote this down, Patrick, beyond bedhead. Yeah.

Right? Like, her wig is a fright this week. She also has an aerosol can. We assume it's an air freshener. The look on her face is like, who farted? Is what her face says. But we don't know why. She's spraying it in everybody's face. It's never acknowledged. Rose asks Sophia, if you hated your sister, would you clean the house for her? And Sophia says, I'd put Vaseline on the tips of her walker.

But we're going to learn, if you remember, Sophia does hate her sister. Yeah. Remember, like, in an episode coming up, like, in whatever season it is. Yeah, Nancy Walker. Yes. Plays her sister. Which, by the way, I made this note in this episode, too. Nancy Walker and Sophia were both born and raised in Sicily. Neither one of them has any trace of any kind of accent. No. They both speak like they're from... Fluent Brooklyn. Fluent Brooklyn.

And I'm like, is that, I guess they just made a choice. It would be distracting for Sophie to have like a thick Italian accent. I mean, it's like Laverne speaking fluent Brooklyn in Milwaukee. And now Dorothy enters carrying a very fake baby. Yeah.

They have these moments where they clearly do the close-ups of the child. Yes. And then every other time it's fake. Of course. And later we'll talk about, but like you can tell because every time Dorothy releases its head, it's just bobbing up and down. I mean, she's treating it like a little hot dog, like a mini hot dog. It's funny because they have the perspective shot so you can see the babies. It's like over Dorothy's shoulder. It's not shot at the same time. Right. Because like when she's like talking and holding the baby, it's clearly not.

a baby? No, it weighs like tissue paper. Right. We learned that this baby belongs to Lucy and Ted. We never meet Lucy and Ted. No. We don't know who they are. We're given no context. It's like, do you know them from church, Dorothy? As this episode goes on, like, do we really believe Ted had a little accident water skiing? I mean,

Like, we get so many episodes where they randomly are taking care of somebody else's kid and they all love it. I was thinking when I'm their age, I will love my grandkids. I will be with my grandkids as much as they need me to be. But I'm not watching Ted and Lucy's kid. No. You know what I mean? No, thank you. And the ladies are over the moon to be like...

stranded with this kid. I wonder how moms out there, mom cheesecakes, how do you feel out there about like other people's kids and all that? Because the messaging they're giving us here is that since they all had kids, it's just so wonderful to be around an infant again. Yes, yes, yes. And I can't imagine that's a universal feeling, although a very common one. But yeah, we learned that Ted has had a water skiing accident. Lucy's

taking him to the hospital. I guess they're good enough friends of Dorothy's that they're going to leave their baby with them for the day or the foreseeable future as it turns out. Blanche is not having it. No. Blanche is mean. She doesn't want a baby in the house. They make a mess. Now we cannot have a baby in this house. My sister's coming. Does she eat them?

I have cleaned this house from top to bottom. I have killed myself for two days. Now babies make a mess. In diapers. And unless we use them as placemats, your sister will never know. I've cleaned the house from top to bottom. I've killed myself for two days. But the house also doesn't look any cleaner than it always does. And she just keeps moving the flower arrangements around.

Right. She ordered like a delivery of flowers, but the house doesn't look any cleaner. Like the house always looks pretty clean. Nervous energy. Yes. Sent that way. And I have to say here, Patrick, that Blanche, if you look, television left, is just hilariously carrying six foot tall pussy willows. I know.

She's just like using it like a prop. And I couldn't stop laughing. I was like, what is she doing? I know. It's that whole thing of like, I always wonder what they're trying to tell us. Like she's trying to clean this house and get it perfect and pristine for her sister, Virginia, who she's clearly trying to impress, even though she's like trying to hate impress her. Right. And I'm like, is this something that you think that Nancy Reagan's decorator would do is the

flowers in the pussy was? Right. Well, it's just the sheer volume of them and like the levels and the high. I don't understand. I know. I don't understand. I know. I know. And can we just talk about too, like, boo-chee-boo-chee-boo and how annoying that was? Boo-chee-boo-chee-boo-chee-boo. Boo-chee-boo.

Finally, someone she can talk to. So this is another thing. It's like Rose is now, they're sitting on the couch and they're like talking to the baby. And again, it feels like a little bit of Betty White's overachieving because it was probably that the note was like, Rose makes baby noises because the punchline is like Sophia saying, finally, someone she can talk to. Right. And it's like Betty White, poochie, poochie, woochie, woochie. And oochie, oochie, boo boo. Ha ha ha.

Even I was annoyed. I know, I know, I know. And I guess it would come out of words, sing-songy words that babies who are not verbal respond to, right? It must have just grown out of that. Yeah, I called Daisy Bubba because I used to call her baby. As she was getting older, I didn't want to call her baby anymore because she's like not a baby. So I call her Bubba. I thought you called her Bubba because she had rolled cigarettes in her sleeve and a mullet and a ball cap. You know, there is that, but also the other reason. So...

Blanche goes on about, you know, why she doesn't like her sister. And she's just making Rose stand from her seat on the couch to do her cleaning. And it's busy actress work. I'm going to fluff the pillows. Right. You know, and I do love Betty White here. She does a fake out. Yes. Where she starts to sit in the armchair and then stops herself because, oh, I might get in trouble. Remember when she was like making up lines for herself in the other episode? That's one of these moments where like, I'm such a good actress. I'm going to fill in the gaps. I don't.

Because you know that wasn't parenthetical. Totally. Right. But she says that she hates her sister Virginia because ever since Virginia was born, her parents never looked at her again. And she calls them mom and dad. She doesn't say big daddy. Right. That always bothered me later on. Yeah. You know, like the through line of that. We'll get more on that later. And basically, she's just saying that like Virginia took the place of being the parents' favorite. And I feel like we know that Blanche was like a raging beauty. And she was like, this is the first we're hearing about.

And it's very early in the series. Right, and it's interesting to hear her put herself down. She was the adorable one, the gorgeous one, the brilliant one. She sat in my daddy's lap for 16 years. She sat in my daddy's lap for 16 years. Which I'm not going to lie to you.

I'm also like, there's a point when like 16 is too old. You know what I mean? Well, and also I have this later, but it's appropriate now. This might go to why Blanche is so selfish about Rose getting a date in the previous episode we just covered. Like she's like,

There's a lot of competition from an early age, those foundational roots. Right. Like watching the series in this kind of way where we're really looking at every choice they're making. We're learning about their real characters. And I got to say, like, I know that we know that Blanche is self-centered, but like to actually see it like in the pilot where she hasn't considered that, how this is going to affect Rose and Dorothy, you know, she is a self-centered character. Yeah. She's met her match in her sister, Virginia. Yeah.

Exactly. And she tells us that, like, Virginia got the parents to hate her so much that her dad called her the bad seed. Called her the bad seed even after her sister electrocuted her. Okay.

This is crazy. It was the day before Christmas. They were playing and her sister jiggled the tree. The star fell off. It broke. She told Blanche to pick it up and put it on her finger. She did that. She plugged it in. Wham. Her eyes bugged out. Her hair shot up straight. She did a crazy rubber dance all over the room. Her heart stopped beating for a minute. And Virginia ran to Daddy and told the dad, Daddy, Big Daddy that we don't call Big Daddy in this episode, that Blanche broke the star. Right.

almost electrocuted Virginia. Yes. And then Blanche gets sent to her room and her dad says that Jesus is mad at you for ruining his birthday. Excuse me, the baby Jesus is mad.

Baby Jesus. Even worse. That's like saying, I'm not angry, Blanche. I'm disappointed. Right, exactly. Baby Jesus is disappointed. But she does sound like a really mean older sister. But Rue McClanahan props to her because she buttons the story with great physical comedy by what? Smacking the H out of the Ming vase with her cleaning towel. Now, the only thing, every time I see that vase, we know that later in this season, Rose is going to shoot that vase. Well, for the first time, Patrick, I thought to myself, I think Coco's ashes are in the vase.

You know? Right? That's where he ended up. That's where he is. Yeah. I mean, Vaz is also ugly as sin, as they say. It's so ugly. It's like its own character. I know. In literary terms, they'd call it personification. Totally. Vaz has a heartbeat. It's like Nancy Reagan's interior designer would never, would never. Oh.

Also, at this point, when she smacks the Ming vase, we get a close-up of Blanche. She's standing next to the front door. Now, there's been scuttlebutt all over the internet for years. Do you see the exclamation mark that is carved into the door? I never have. Google it. And you'll see, like, on the door, there is an exclamation mark. And there's been, for years, like, sort of fans wondering if that was intentional and what wasn't. So I looked it up. I did a little deep dive. From CheatSheet.com, it says, years after the door was carved into the door,

the show's original run, when larger high definition TVs were like made and what people were using it at the home, you could really see details of the set that you couldn't see before. And one of them is this exclamation mark on the door. And there's been tons of fan theories about what it is. The one people really landed on was that Bea Arthur carved it into the door early on in filming for good luck. But Jim Colucci, the author of Golden Girls Forever, Golden Girls Forever, by the way, you need to get that.

book if you don't have it everybody it is like a tome it tells you everything you need to know about the golden girls he interviewed the original set designer ed stevenson and it turns out that this guy ed the set designer had spent a lot of time working in florida theater and had fallen in love with a particular florida wood called peaky cypress and apparently peaky cypress is very expensive and he wanted the door made out of that wood but they like the production wouldn't let him spend the money so they built it out of like other cheaper wood and then he went in and painted like

faux grain on the door and it just happened to be that like without realizing it he sort of painted an exclamation mark oh my gosh well you won't be able to unsee it now every time you see the door you're gonna look for it wow i thought i knew everything that's amazing as day my dad works in b2b marketing he came by my school for career day and said he was a big row as man then he told everyone how much he loved calculating his return on ad spend

So he

here we are. We're going to meet the famous Virginia, the most horrible sister in the world. I kind of love how they do this too, a lot, where it's like we never see the scene of her arriving. And we don't even see the lunch that they have. We see them like after the lunch. Yes. So this has been, probably the barbs have been building all afternoon, right? And I want to talk about this for a second. That was a lovely lunch, Blanche. A lovely lunch in a lovely house with your lovely friends. Yes.

Stop making fun of me, Virginia. Making fun of you, honey? I was complimenting you. I heard the way you said lovely. How did I say lovely? Oh, you know very well how you said lovely. Say lovely. Lovely. Oh, you know very well how you said lovely. And I was upset. Patrick, say lovely. Lovely. There you go. That's correct. Yeah, yeah. It's very reminiscent of get out of here. Get out of here. Tell the cheesecakes they're lovely, Patrick. You're lovely. Cheesecakes, you're lovely.

I became mildly obsessed with this actress. So the actress playing Virginia is Cherie North. And I love Googling these actors that are on the show because a lot of them are early in their career. She was not. But like they'll go on to do interesting things or they're coming from really a very interesting career. Will you humor me with a little bit of a Cherie deep dive? Yeah. It's quick.

But basically, her professional acting career began on Broadway in 1953 in a show called Hazel Flag. She played a character named Whitey. And I guess this character was like primarily a dancer. She comes from like a big dancing background. And this performance caught the attention of the movie studio 20th Century Fox, who gave her a four-year contract in 1954. Now, this is where it gets really interesting.

Lay it on me. 20th Century Fox wanted to groom Cherie North as a glamour girl who could substitute for get ready for her cheesecakes, Marilyn freaking Monroe. Huge. So they were saying like at the time, Marilyn Monroe was becoming like increasingly more unreliable. And Hollywood insiders at the time said that the studio only gave Cherie North this contract as a way to like scare Marilyn Monroe.

To bring in another, like, bombshell who's like, she can do it if you can't do it. Because not only did she have the same blonde hair, apparently she also matched almost exactly Marilyn's height and measurements. Just with those sexy hooded eyes, those bedroom eyes. I know. Well, it's funny because you see her as Virginia and she's like a very attractive older woman. And it's one of the things we'll learn about her is that she didn't want to do the plastic surgery and all of this stuff. So that's why she had a very long and wonderful career, but she wasn't trying to stay, like, youthful. We are not the same. I know.

Well, look, you're nailing it. Thanks so much. You are nailing it. Thanks so much. But so Cherie, back in the day, quickly started getting Marilyn's jobs. There was a movie called Pink Tights that the studio wanted Marilyn to do, and she didn't want to do it. And they told her they were going to give it to Cherie North in an attempt to scare Marilyn into doing it, and it didn't work. And Cherie North does it, and it kickstarts her career. Then in 1955, she replaced Marilyn Monroe in a movie called How to Be Very, Very Popular, co-starring Betty Grable. The studio succumbed.

suspended Marilyn Monroe for like bad behavior or whatever. Yeah. But this situation of her replacing Marilyn in this movie landed Cherie North on the cover of Life magazine. That's huge. Huge. Under the headline, Cherie North takes over for Marilyn Monroe. Wow. No presh. No presh. But according to Cherie, despite all of this, Marilyn never treated her like a rival and had a really good sense of humor about it all. Doesn't

Marilyn seem like that kind of lady? She's the best. Renee Taylor, I saw her one-woman show and she talks about Marilyn a lot. Oh, really? Yeah, they went to acting class together and Marilyn was actually so humble and insecure and was always working so hard to be the best and it was so nice and so lovely and just a lovely person. It's so funny. The actor's studio is in my neighborhood and I walk by it all the time and I imagine Marilyn Monroe walking up the stairs to acting class or what's the hot guy, James Dean? Like,

Just hanging out in my neighborhood. What's the hot guy? The hot guy is Ryan Phillippe, as everybody knows. But the hot guy from back then was James Dean. But according to Cherie, Marilyn, when she would get stopped on the street in New York and people would be like, oh my God, Marilyn Monroe, can I have your picture? She said, no, I'm not Marilyn. I'm Cherie North. Isn't that sweet? And Cherie says that she wished that she and Marilyn had been able to be actual friends.

friends, but it wasn't like allowed by the studio because she feels like she could have been like a good friend to Marilyn Monroe. That's sweet. It's wild. And I'm also glad that this master plan to use Sheree North, you know, kind of went tits up and that she actually got to do some work. Big, beautiful tits up. Big, beautiful, hooded, sleepy, bedroom-eyed, tits up, Sheree North. Can we say tits up all the time? That's a great expression. That's right. It's like when we have something to do that we don't want to do. Come on, Patrick, tits up. Tits up.

Yeah.

Tits up, Patrick. I need a t-shirt. Tits up. Look, that's our first merch. Tits up. Tits up. Done. So Cherie goes on to have a really great career. She worked steadily for more than half a century in theater, TV, and film. She wanted to age as she aged. She did not want to get plastic surgery. She didn't care about staying being glamorous. She had a long run as Lou Grant's girlfriend on the Mary Tyler Moore show, which means that she and Betty White wouldn't have known each other. I did know that. And I think it's fascinating just how many of those gals work together. Well, it's so interesting because it's like,

She was a movie star that's now doing this TV show. So she comes on as like a guest star, but like she's not like the star anymore. But they must have known that you were the other Marilyn Monroe. Like that's wild. Yeah. She also played Kramer's mom on Seinfeld. She was nominated for two Emmys in 1969 for a show called Marcus Welby, M.D. and 1979 for Archie Bunker's Place. And then she died in 2005 after complications following a surgery.

I know, but I love her. I love knowing the story about her and like seeing her in this episode. And also I love knowing, and I didn't know this. I didn't know she was a two-time Emmy Award nominee. You know, I knew she obviously, how many times have I seen this episode? Yeah. You know, but I love stuff like that. She has this whole full career. Yeah. We're back to the scene and Blanche tells Virginia that the house was done by Nancy Reagan's decorator. Really? Really. But let's talk about you. And she just goes at her like she's made out of ham and she's a rabid dog. She's like...

Never mind about that. Let's talk about you. You look like you lost a little weight, sugar. I have. You know, at your age, when you lose weight, your skin just hangs there like... Yeah. Like leaves on a willow. I haven't lost that much. I don't think that's happened yet. Well, I don't know, but if I were you, I sure wouldn't wave goodbye. You know, at your age, when you lose weight, your skin just hangs there. Right. Like leaves on a willow. Like leaves on a willow.

The two of them with these Southern accents, like I like especially Cherie North. I don't think that's really how Southern people would say things, but I love the way like leaves on a willow. You know, I have to say, Patrick, because we know where it's headed. Yeah. It makes Cherie North's Virginia's commenting on these next few lines a little sadder because because we know, of course, she's lost weight. She's sick. Exactly. As a first time viewer. Yeah. You just think it's, you know, bitchy bantering between sisters at this point. And it's

so savage. It's like, oh my God, you two really hate each other. I don't get the Virginia hating Blanche part. It seems like one directional hate at this point. Right. But Virginia demands that they put an end to it. She wants them to grow up. They've been doing this their whole lives. That's right. And Blanche takes a beat and then asks her, So you're thinking about getting a facelift?

And that's where I had the note here about, I think that explains why Blanche was so jealous last week when Rose hooked up with Arnie. Yes. I mean, that's just savage to your point. Savage. And there's so much like, we really do see where Blanche comes from. We really see why she is the way, because she like grew up with two sisters and they were clearly all battling to be the most beautiful their whole lives. And like that shit never leaves you. It's so shallow. So now we're in the

bedroom. Dorothy's bedroom with baby Danny, Sophia and Rose. And I'd just like to point out, Patrick, the view from Dorothy's bedroom. Is it of City Hall? Go look. I will. What the hell? Miami...

Federal building is right outside her window. Did you not notice? No. I'll look for the exclamation point. Please. You look for the City Hall Palace. I don't know what it is, but it's outside Dorothy's bedroom. The reason I didn't notice is because Dorothy is holding the baby while the baby is crying. And I said, is it just me or is Dorothy the least maternal of all of these women? No, she's walking around just jostling the fake baby. Yeah.

You know, like it's not a human being. I know. Like when you're doing a scene like that, how careful do you have to be to really try to sell it that it's a real baby? You do. Yeah.

You know, and I do take a little demerit, actor demerits on that point for as brilliant as she is. Well, wait till Rose, a couple of scenes from now, comes running in with the baby in a car seat. Well, here's some less demerits, but still you can spot it a mile away. Betty White and Estelle Getty are, they're busying themselves with absolutely nothing, which I'm obsessed with. You called it actress busy work. I did. I did. That's why I had their full names here. But like Estelle is folding blankets and Betty is going through what at

appears interminably baby toys and ransacking the baby bag. Because it's like the baby bag is like a clown car. It's just endless, you know? But she is saying, like, I love the moment where she's saying that the baby is colicky, so you should give him some brandy. It's colic. My children had it. You give them brandy for colic? Yes, after dinner with a cigar. Rose, you give brandy for teething. You rub it on their gums. Oh, I thought I gave it to them for colic.

In their bottles. Well, my babies were very happy. In their bottles?

And I'm like, hold on a second, everybody. I am a recent parent and like my kid is 10. I've had her for a long time. In no world was I going to put alcohol, like literal booze in my kid's mouth. Rose is also talking about like all the things that like the disposable bottle and the pre-made formula and talking about how it was in the old days. Rose made her own formula. I was like, I would not have survived. I could never have had a kid. Fish ointment. I know.

What did they use the fish ointment for? Remember when we had to use cotton and fish ointment instead of baby wipes, instead of pop-ups? Oh, my God. You know, and Sophia chimes in about their version of baby wipes, which is they had in Sicily, they had a leaf in the river. Right. And then Dorothy's like, you didn't have a baby in Sicily. I was a baby in Sicily. A leaf in the river. With no Italian accent. That's what I was just going to say.

to say that like she grew up in Sicily and like I think about this all the time just as like an observer of the show somebody made the decision I want to know that she tried it once like in the pilot they tried to give her the accent they're like oh that is not gonna work yeah because there's no accent and it's never discussed no they could have given her another stroke where it just right that part of the brain you know what I mean

So Blanche enters. Well, she's gone. Yeah. You know, her sister Virginia has left. And Dorothy thinks that that's the end of the Virginia visit. Like, that's the reason we couldn't sit on the couch for two days was so you could have like an hour long lunch with her. And they're confused because they think her sister seems nice. Yes. You know. And Blanche is confused, too. Like, so Blanche and Virginia are going to have dinner that night. And Rose is like, she seemed lovely. And Rue McClanahan was so brilliant in this delivery, right? She was like, yes, she was just confused at how sweet her sister was. She was like, she was nice. And then she said, have a bit.

She was interested, charming, caring, loving. Just couldn't have been more wonderful. Your Blanche scoop is perfect. Wonderful. Thank you, Patrick. I just wonder what she wants, the conniving little witch.

And again, she just undercuts it. And if she'd really laid into it, it just wouldn't have been as funny. It is really funny. Your Blanche scoop, I just can't get enough of it. Oh, thank you. Let's have more scoop here because we're going to the restaurant. I know. We're going to the restaurant. Now, this is not the restaurant we get for the rest of the series because I'm telling you, every time we see a restaurant, we always get the establishing shot of that very fancy building. We don't get it here. We're in a restaurant that is as bright as a Walmart. Right.

It is so bright in there. You can see shadows everywhere. It is so bright that I was turning down the brightness on my screen. And I have to say, I was a little exhausted at this point because Blanche is still having her day in court. Still.

She is not ready to make nice. No, she's not letting it go. Virginia wants to have a toast and Blanche says, with water? Well, I can't drink. Well, see, it's a little foreshadowing. Yeah. But then, of course, Blanche has to say, you could never drink one Jack Daniels and you'd disappear with half the fraternity house. To which I said, the girls have all the fun. Oh. Somebody give me half a fraternity house. Okay.

I smell a birthday present. What are all these men doing here wearing their Alpha Mega Gamma shirts? Thanks, Jen. I think what's interesting about this conversation is that like Virginia is really driving home that they've fought all their life. They've never had a real conversation and she wants Blanche to be nice. I think Blanche is like her whole thing is like she wants something but she's going to be an heirloom. She wants Big Daddy's water.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, like, she doesn't realize what's coming. And, like, Virginia, I didn't even think Virginia's trying to butter her up. I think Virginia, as we're about to learn, is facing real, like, possible death. And it's like, oh, no, I've been a bitch to my sister my whole life. And I'm like, Virginia's trying to, like, have a nice moment. And Blanche is saying, like, the reason I don't like you is because you've taken everything I've... You took everything. Yeah. And she's like, what did I take? Right. And so she starts listing, you know, cashmere sweaters, poodle skirt. She would just say...

What is a poodle skirt? I can only see it in Back to the Future. Oh, my gosh. They're fabulous. I went in seventh grade, my seventh grade dance in a poodle skirt. You did? And it's like big? It's like a big, poofy, almost like a circle skirt. And it has a little poodle on the side with like a dog leash, usually like in sparkles and glitter. You have petticoats underneath. Oh, my God. Yeah, and you usually wear it with a little tight sweater. And you wore like... Little bobby socks and then those saddle shoes. And it was really fun to swing dance in. Oh. Because that was the era in the 50s. And it was just so fun.

- But you weren't going to your seventh grade dance in the 50s. - No, no.

I'm a ghost. This is my 100-year-old friend, Jennifer. It was a Halloween dance. I can see you wearing with like your little like cat eye glasses. I didn't wear glasses, but I should have. Oh, my God. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But what's the big thing Virginia stole? The big thing that she stole was Tom. And we learned that like Blanche had been dating this boy, Tom, who she really loved. And she like had to go spend a weekend with the relatives. Aunt Augusta. Aunt Augusta. She had to go see Aunt Augusta. And when she got back. Don't.

Don't act so surprised, Virginia. You knew I was dating him. Then I had to go to the country to visit Aunt Augusta. When I got back, I had poison ivy and you had Tom.

I love that boy. I wanted to marry him. We were serious. You only had two dates with him? I was fast. She wanted to marry him. And what's even worse, who ends up marrying him, Patrick? Virginia marries him. And worse than that, Blanche has to be the maid of honor. That's gross. Even then, I was like, you broke girl code. And it's also like, Virginia is shocked that Blanche cared about Tom at all. And I'm like, you didn't want to ask?

You know what I mean? I can see that setting the seeds of like, yes, I'm never going to speak to my sister again. Oh, absolutely. But that's like the one thing I heard in the whole laundry list that I thought was a serious offense because the others were kind of child things, like even the electricity thing.

She electrocuted her sister. I also love in this moment that we learn that for the wedding, Virginia made her wear a horrid green dress. She said, which you know is my most awful color. I just look like a swamp frog. Swamp frog. Sweetheart, production seated you at a table with a bright green tablecloth. Am I the only one that's seeing this? And you decorated your bedroom with green. Right.

Head to toe, Green. Totally. I did love this moment, though. This made me smile. When Virginia tells, you know, would it help to know that Tom fooled around? Yeah. And Blanche says, no. With who? Everyone. Yeah. And like, this is where we really get to the heart of it. Because Blanche is saying, well, good, that serves you right. What goes around comes around. And Virginia's like, well, then I must have been terrible. Yeah, it must have been really bad. And she says, what do you mean? Yeah. And it's the reason she's here. And Virginia says, I'm dying, Blanche. What? What?

I'm dying. Close up on Blanche. A pan in. Oh, my God. That explains it then. Explains what? Why you're looking so much older than I am. And I said, damn, Susan Harris. That was a good joke. Yes, it's a good joke. Because it's a great way to take something really horrific and does add a little levity for like a tinge, a sec. It made me think, though, like I've always wondered how I would receive news like that. If somebody sat you down and told you that they were

dying. It depends on the person and the relationship, wouldn't you think? I think. I've never had that experience. Really? I mean, my mom's wife died and it happened very fast. We got a call. My mom was like, Carol's in the hospital and she's dying. Like, you need to come home. So we went home and Carol died very fast. And it was, you know, 10, 12 years ago now. But I mean, I've experienced death, but I've never like, no one's ever sat me down and looked me in the face and been like, we're coming to the end here. Patrick? No, don't you do it. We're coming to the end here. See,

See, what if I laugh? I would laugh. Well, now we know. Knowing how to speak and understand a new language can be an invaluable tool when traveling, meeting new friends, or just even to master a new skill. But it's not always simple when you're bogged down by textbooks and structure classes. That's why so many people trust Rosetta Stone. Rosetta Stone is the most trusted language learning program available on desktop or as an app.

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So

So we're back at the house for the next scene and Sophia is eating a bowl of Fritos the only way one possibly can. Very, very loudly. And also, let me just say that Dorothy and Sophia, they're sitting on the couch right next to each other. No one does that, but that's clearly just for the camera shot. That's the only reason. If you have a

three-seater and you're two people, you're going to sit on either end of the couch. You see it in sitcoms all the time where, like, the dad is in the front seat driving and the kid is in the back seat. Or, like, his wife is in the back seat and it's clearly just so they can get the camera in there. Anyway, Doc is reading a book. And, uh, Sophia, Soph, Soph is reading the Florida News. And also, Patrick, what, they're wearing what? A nightgown and a bathrobe. Always. Look, I love that Dorothy has no shame. She's going to put her bathrobe on when it's bathroom o'clock. Yeah, and just, like, a wing-tipped collar. Totally. Yeah.

Take the girl out of the masculine, but not the masculine out of the girl. I love that she just goes to whatever TJ Maxx she got it from. And she's like, do you have any nightgowns? I'm going to need one up to the neck. I need one like right up to the jaw. And to your point, Patrick, the only way to eat Fritos really loudly and before we've even spoken a word. Yes. Good old Beatrice Arthur gives us an excellent eyes only take to the studio audience.

Before she says, Ma, could you eat a little more quietly, please? I love those looks of like, she truly can't believe this is happening. No, and those looks, like we talked about over and over, no one did them better. Or since. Yeah, she's just the best at the deadpan take. Yeah, it's what you were saying about make the camera come to you. She's perfect at that.

Perfect. You know, I couldn't agree more. So Blanche enters. She's in a daze. Clearly, the conversation with Virginia is on her mind. We learn that Rose is out driving the baby around to get him to go to sleep. Right. Ted needed minor surgery. He's got to stay at the hospital overnight. I don't believe you, Ted. They're in Vegas. Ted and Lucy are up to no good.

That's the spinoff I want to see. Anyway, they say they're still at the hospital. Because we know, historically, this is like the height of the cocaine trade in Miami. I want to know that either Ted and Lucy are out blowing lines at some club. It is Miami. Or they're out selling cocaine. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Well, anyway, they finally, you know, Rose comes in. They finally get the... Shh, shh, shh.

Shh, he's asleep. They're mid-conversation. I don't understand why they needed this moment. I know. Rose comes running in, carrying the baby in the car seat, but the car seat, the back of it to the cameras, because clearly the baby's not in there. It's a fake baby. Right. Why couldn't Rose just be in her room doing something else? Like, why did we need this moment of Rose running through? Just filler. Just filler.

And to establish that we still have the GD baby. Exactly. Which I got to tell you, there are some B storylines that are really good. I hate this storyline. I do too. I think it's pretty dumb. I love that the women still like having babies. I guess that's what we're supposed to learn from this. Well, Blanche doesn't. She's just like, we're going to have that baby until college. She's just over it. She's like, get that goddamn baby out of my face.

She has never been in for the baby being here. And I made the joke that Dorothy was the least maternal, but maybe it was Blanche. I feel like we're going to learn that Blanche's nannies raised her kids. Even though Rose is childish in nature, like the most childish in behavior is Blanche. Sure. She's spoiled. And she's the one that wants to be the center of attention. She's not going to want a baby around that's going to be the center of attention. Yeah. She's never gotten out of her toddler stage. No. And it's Virginia's fault. Yeah.

And Charmaine. Don't forget Charmaine. I love Charmaine. We're going to meet Charmaine eventually, right? Isn't she the one that wrote the book? I don't remember. Vixen, Story of a Woman. I can't believe I just pulled the title out of nowhere. You did, out of nowhere. Vixen, Story of a Woman. Oh my God. I think that is Charmaine. So they ask her, how was dinner? Yes. And she's in shock. Okay, this bit is fantastic. Okay.

This is why they needed Rose running through. Yeah. Because Rose has run into her bedroom with the baby. Mm-hmm. And this is where Blanche tells the girls that her sister is dying. And somebody says, what? Right. Rose misses the first half. Right. And only hears the second half. So she assumes it's Blanche who's dying. She says, because she enters, Sophia points and says she's dying and points at Blanche. What? Dying. She's dying. Oh, my God. Blanche! I didn't even know you were sick! Oh!

Not Blanche, her sister. Oh, thank God. Oh, honey. I didn't even know you were sick. Oh, my God. Your fake rose lines are so good. Because it's exactly like Betty White is so committed. And then she goes, no, not her, her sister. Oh, thank God.

Brilliant joke. Brilliant delivery. It's so good. Oh, my God. This is where it's like she came here to tell you that and Blanche says, no, she could have done that over the phone. She wants something from me. And this is where Dorothy wastes no time absolutely scrolling

Yep. At Blanche. Dorothy's internal rage through this entire first season is wild. And again, to Rosie. Right. She says, oh, enough already. The woman is dying. What could she possibly want from you? My kidney. On a very special Golden Girls outro music. After commercial break, Patrick, very special Golden Girls intro music. Go ahead. The kidney. The kidney.

My kidney. Why would you need a kidney, Dorothy? To feed the cat rolls. Don't sound like her one bit, but there it is. To feed the cat rolls. So we learn that Virginia is going into renal failure and that Blanche's kidney is her only hope. Hmm.

So I did a little bit of a deep dive on kidney failure because I know, I mean, I think we all know that like kidney shit is bad. Yeah. And that it's hard to get a kidney. So here's what I learned. It does sound like just terrifying. Yeah. I thought it was one of those organs we don't really use. But because we got...

Oh, okay. See, my rose is showing. My rose is showing. Do the kidneys get used a lot? Because you got two, but you only need one. I'm going to give you a 50-50 shot. Okay. Yes or no. I'm going to go with yes. Yay. Because Virginia's dying because hers isn't working. That's right. That's right. So, kidney flus.

failure and renal failure are apparently the same thing. And it just means that your kidneys can no longer remove enough waste in your blood. And if you can't find a transplant, you can go on dialysis, right? So dialysis is a process where they hook you up to a tube and essentially over the course of like four hours, it drains your blood slowly and cleans it and sort of recycles it back into your body. And you have to do that three times a week. And if you don't get a transplant, like the life expectancy on dialysis on average is only five to 10 years. And it's also like

a miserable existence. You can't travel. You can't do anything. You're hooked up to this machine like three days a week for hours and hours. Oh, it's so rough. So Virginia would be a blood relative donor for Blanche. And there's a lot of advantages to that, obviously. It's a higher likelihood that your body won't reject the kidney. That is the biggest problem in kidney transplants is the body rejecting it. So they do a lot of things to make, like to find the highest likely match. And obviously a blood relative is going to be a high likely match.

But also the process goes much faster. They say if you have a relative or a person, a live donor who's willing to donate a kidney to you and they're a good match, it can usually be done within a few months. But if you get on the national waiting list, you can wait three to five years, which means you can die on dialysis before you actually get the kidney. Which is what happens...

here. Yes. Yeah. So more on that as the episode progresses. But that is what Virginia is facing. Like if Blanche doesn't say yes, she's going to have to get on the waiting list and she might die on the list. And they put that in the text. What happens if she doesn't get your kidney? Yeah. She'll die. She'll die. Exactly. And so you hold her life in your hands. So like Rose says, what are you going to do? And Blanche says, I don't know. To which Sophia says, glad you're not my sister. Yeah.

which is kind of true. Like, but then again, I have a great relationship with my brothers. Yeah. So like, I would absolutely give them. My question is, is this a real question for anybody? Like if I'm sure, no, I'm sure. I mean, if you have like medical complications or whatever, I get it. Now that I have a kid, I would probably save my kidney in case she needs it or whatever. Although we're not blood related. So it might not, who knows if I can get that for her. But like,

to me in a moment like this it's like all right Blanche you're in your mid to late 50s like probably you're not going to encounter anybody else who's going to need your kidney she's your sister I understand the setup here like the tension is Blanche hates her why would she do this for her but like for me I'm just kind of like I don't know there was a time when I was younger when I was like when I learned that the kidney thing was a real thing that I'm like there are strangers who just donate their kidneys to science they just like you can go and donate your kidney just because somebody needs one and

Maybe this is too private to ask you, but on your driver's license, do you? Oh, yeah. I'm an organ donor. I am, too. Yeah. I am, too. But other than that, cremate me. You know what I want done. I've already made it clear. Spread me in the theater district and a little bit in front of the Oscar Wilde Memorial Bookshop. You got it. I'm here for it. And don't you worry. I love that we got that out of the way in the first episode. We know each other's wishes. We know each other's wishes.

we're back to the episode and blanche is like too stressed out she goes i need something to eat and i was like oh that's so interesting because like today it'd be like i need a cocktail i need a drink right she'd run into the room and make herself a martini or whatever but they needed to justify running into the kitchen and in this next segment in the kitchen this is ridiculous i love it so much yes so blanche takes everything out of the refrigerator and sophia rearranges all of it on the table and what i could ascertain we have yeah we have some fried chicken wings i was like is that a

plate of wings because we're not in the cheesecake era yet. No, no. Chicken wings, like mashed potatoes, grapes, crudités, egg salad, perhaps some potato salad, a half-eaten pie. Yeah.

And she does all this only to not eat it and leave it for the other girls to clean up. They put a bowl in front of Dorothy that looks like a bowl of chicken pot pie. That was what I decided it was. There's so much food on the table. So much. I love the... And it was like a barbecue. Like, it was all very... It was all very 4th of July. It was...

Somebody prepared a full plate of wings and then had none of them. Well, they ask her, didn't you just have dinner? She says, oh, I couldn't eat. Yes. I was just too stunned. But she's saying she doesn't want to donate the kidney because she's afraid of like how it'll affect her appearance. Yeah. She's afraid that her ankles will swell up, her eyes will puff up. I'll look just like the Pillsbury Doughboy. And also like you. Thank you.

Thank you for that. But also like you said about your daughter. Yeah. She's like, she's not my daughter. Right. She's my sister that she hates. That she hates. And it's like, are you going to murder your sister by way of not giving her your. That's a savage way to take out your childhood trauma, Blanche. So like once Blanche exits, we're in the kitchen and Rose asked Dorothy what she would do. And she says like what anybody would say.

For my children, I wouldn't even have to think. I mean, I'd give them both my kidneys. I'd cut them out myself. Me too. I'd give them my heart. I'd give to all my children, except Phil. Why not Phil? Because he never calls, he never writes. I only hear from him at Christmas when he sends me a cheddar cheese nativity scene.

I'm Catholic. I can't spread a wise man on a Ritz cracker. She only hears from him at Christmas when he sends me a cheddar cheese nativity scene, which she has no use for because she's a Catholic and she can't spread a wise man on a Ritz cracker. I mean, the funniest part was the food and the fact that she just took it out and left it. I know. And that plate of wings. So the next day we're in the living room. Blanche is pouring Virginia some coffee and the coffee is set up on the end table. So Blanche, what I noticed is she had to move her precious flower arrangement. Oh, yes.

Right? That's right. Right. There were so many flowers in that room. And they're, you know, they're still talking it over. You know, Virginia's being very understanding. And she's like, this must be hard for you, Blanche. And Blanche is like, yes, it is. Like, we're talking about a vile organ of my body. Now, Sophia enters. Yes. And I guess grabs the sort of uneaten mini cheesecakes. Is this her first cheesecake appearance? Oh, my God. I think you're right. I think I'm right. I wonder if, like, after that, they filmed that scene and then they did the cheesecakes. Like, Winifred Harvey had, like, an off.

moment. Yeah, maybe. And it was all going to be cheesecake going forward. Maybe. You know? But I swear it looks like little slices of cheesecake. I also just made the note that, like, I really hope I never need a vital organ from anybody that I'm directly related to because I am not going to be as understanding as Virginia. My whole MO here would be like, you're telling me you're going to let me die? Yeah.

Well, also, Virginia is taking care of Blanche's emotions. Exactly. And, like, I don't see much taken care of in reverse of the woman who's actually dying. No, because I feel like Virginia's doing that reverse psychology thing where she's got to get the world's most self-centered slut to get her. But enough about me. But...

Where she's kind of like, she can't be mad because if she's mad at Blanche, then Blanche would have a reason to not do this. I feel like as an acting exercise, you know, Cherie North is like, let me make her feel like I absolutely have no expectations to guilt her into doing this thing that like any normal person would do. They seem like they have Sophia coming in and out, that they're using the clearing of the end table to justify all her little one-liners as she comes in and out, you

You know, I love the Sophia one liners. You're going to give it to her or not. What does it mean? A little less bourbon. It's a big decision. Sophia. She's got to think about it. She's family. If you can't count on family, who the hell can you count on? She's Italian.

Now, thank you for this because one person really tries to get the group applause going. It does not take off. Yeah, the studio audience. They might as well have said, come on. Let me hear it.

It's so funny when you hear that in a sitcom. It's one person thinking they're leading the charge on the group applause and it doesn't happen. I have to say, I'm with the clapper. If you can't count on family, who the hell can you count on? Yeah, but I mean... Even if it's chosen family. In fairness, she did electrocute her that one time on Christmas Eve. You know what I mean? And blamed it on her. And blamed it. You're right. It straightened her beautiful curly hair. She deserves to die. Exactly.

Well, Virginia tells Blanche she'll understand if she says no. And Blanche wants to know why she didn't ask Charmaine. The two of you are always closer. And Virginia says Charmaine's kidneys are basically conjoined and can't be separated. This is where we learn that Charmaine is a mess. I love it. Leave it to Charmaine. And they bond over the following. Because it's just too good. Like, I love Charmaine. Me too. Just invisible Charmaine. I'm here for it. Have you read her book, Vixen's Story of a Woman? No.

Get the audio book. It's wild. But they finally have a bonding moment over their hatred. Yes, yes, totally. But how she always was able to get out of anything. She could never help mama because she had heart flutters. She could never take gym class. No. Her hip uterus. She never did any housework because she had a spastic colon and now she has attached kidneys. They say that girl is some kind of mutant.

Oh, and Sophia says she would offer her one of her kidneys. I love that in every episode it's reinforced that Sophia is just peeing everywhere. She's incontinent in every episode.

She is absolutely incontinent. And of course, Blanche, no one can make it about Blanche more than Blanche. Totally. So, you know, again, reverse psychology, I guess. But, you know, Virginia's telling her, look, if you decide not to, I'll understand. I'll swear. And, you know, Blanche is like, sure, you'll be dead. And everybody was saying Blanche killed her. Like, let's make it about you yet again. But it's also like Blanche.

It's kind of true. Yeah. Like, you literally hold your sister's life in your hands right now. And then, very good psychology telling her, you know, it's a terrible choice and I don't know what I would do under the same circumstances. I was like, Virginia, say less. Like, you're not helping your cause here. You're literally admitting to your sister. Well, not with a narcissist. No, I...

You know? Totally. I love clinical narcissist. Yeah. And Blanche says, are you saying you wouldn't give me your kidney? And she's like, yeah, I don't know. And then this is the line of the episode. Blanche says, well, I'm not surprised. You never even lent me a Kleenex. Besides, I'm a size eight.

Your kidney wouldn't fit me. There's not room in my body for your kidney. There's no room in my body for your kidney. Oh, my God. She was Marilyn Monroe's also ran Blanche. Uh-huh. She's just too fat. Her little petite, perfect bodied Blanche. There's no room in my body. And again, she says it's just so quiet and subtle. I mean, it's just like little mini ice daggers. I know. Oh.

The way she delights in being skinny, it is my favorite, favorite, favorite thing. Now, it turns here and it's, again, I think it's one of Rue McClanahan's best acting moments and it's all done with the face. Yes, yes. So she asks her, you know, it's like, are you scared? And her sister says, terrified. Yes. I guess anybody would be. I guess.

And Virginia goes in to hug her sister Blanche. She says, Blanche, whatever happens, hug. And Rue McClanahan's reaction is Emmy-worthy good. She inhales her breath and just her look on her face while her sister says, I love you. I mean, it's just so good. They are all really good actors. They are. You know? Then Virginia grabs her clearly empty suitcase. I know. She basically picks it up with one hand. We already know she's the size of a Clydesdale, thanks to Blanche.

I mean, she's packed nary a piece of clothing. Nary a piece of clothing. Well, she's going to die. What does she need her clothes for? Oh, my God. That's so funny. What do you do in that moment? If that's you, do you pretend? Do you use two hands? It's the same thing as the baby. Like for some of the most brilliant actresses in the world, there's not a whole lot of mime. Totally. Mime acting here that they're very successful in, you know, and maybe it's

It's just maybe it's just it was several takes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know. I have this image of you now heaving it off the couch and dragging it out the door with both. Oh, oh, these shoes. These Ferragamo's are so heavy. All right. So we're in the kitchen and Rose is on the phone. And I just want to say the phone on the wall. Yes. All right. This was the next step up from the rotary phone that we all had in the 70s.

Like when you got the push button phone that she has, that saved three hours out of your day. 100%. Oh my God. Did you have a rotary phone? Yes. When I was a real little kid, we had a rotary phone. Yeah. And now this is a push button phone. The push button phone. They do have a rotary phone in the living room because I remember that's what Kate uses to call her dad.

That's right. That's right. But the one on the wall, that's what I had in my kitchen. I mean, this is just a filler scene, but it does give my biggest laugh of the episode. Okay, what is it? Which is when, like, Rose says she called the doctor. Like, the scene opens with her hanging up the phone and she's called the doctor. And she said, the doctor says it was the first time he was called because the baby was sleeping during the day. Beat. And then I think he called me an idiot. Yeah.

And I scream laughed. I know. Can you imagine a doctor being like, you idiot? Yes, I can. I know. Probably in season five, episode one. Probably Dr. Bud. We'll get there. And like, whatever. So this part of the scene ends with Dorothy saying, this has to stop. We can't keep going in and waking the baby up all night. Like, he's got to sleep. Right. And Blanche says, he wasn't the only one who was up all night. Right.

Blanche in her melodrama era. She announces that, of course, she's going to do it. She's going to go through with the surgery. I feel like it's weird that we're patting her on the back for not just letting her sister die. Yeah, they're like, oh, you're so brave. You really are. She wants to get to know her as adults and be friends. She says, after all, she's the only family I have. I thought you had a sister, Charmaine. Blanche, what does Blanche say? She says, oh, you can't count her. Why, she's an awful, selfish, neurotic woman who made me and Virginia miserable on tie line. Which I just think is so

funny because it's like now it's like you can just see the triangulating of the sisters. And how many times has that triangulation happened? Totally. Remember Blanche, you were always closer to Charmaine. Why didn't you ask her? That means like all the growing up Charmaine and Virginia picked on Blanche. But now it's Blanche and Virginia against Charmaine. It's just so funny. Exactly. So she says she's got to go pack. And now presumably it's the next day, the next scene, right? Because we have a costume change. Right. And they're basically like, finally, Ted and Lucy are back to get the baby. Finally, I have Dorothy's

Fia and Rose are at the door with the fake baby. Yes. I will say, as they're saying goodbye, Rose calls the baby Pussycat. And to me, it felt like one of the writers was like, oh, my mom used to call me Pussycat. I'm going to put it in here. And they're like, oh, let's keep that. I thought the same thing. That might have been the origin story of that. The baby leaves. Oh, God. Can we just say, bye-eezy, bye-eezy? Bye.

Bye, Z-bye. Yeah. So, like, Rose and Sophia talk about how much they hate hospitals because they're talking about how, like, Blanche is going to do the surgery or whatever. And we get this long monologue from Rose about how she holds her breath in elevators. And one time that resulted in her fainting. And then she had, like, an x-ray where she had to keep holding her breath. It's like this long...

law. It's endless. And it keeps cutting back to Sophia, who's making the, like, what are you talking about face? It's very funny. So Dorothy comes back in. She's got great news. Yeah, she says, Ted and Lucy said that we could have the baby again next month when they go away for a weekend. Which is what they did this weekend, I'm convinced.

100%. Lucy's like, Ted had an accident water skiing. Right? They just wanted to go get it on. They did. They're on South Beach all night just dancing, drinking. That's all they wanted to do. We've got these old ladies that are willing to take the baby for a whole weekend at any time. So excited. Dummies. But Blanche enters. Guess what? Everything's fine. Blanche is fine. She looks like a million bucks. You know what's not fine, though? What? That bow blouse. What?

Now, bow blouses were really a thing in the 80s, and I hope they never come back. They shat. But everyone's like, Blanche, what are you doing here? Did something happen? And Blanche explains the best possible thing happened. They couldn't use my kidney. My blood vessels were too small. But of course they're too small. I've always been very petite.

That is the joke that just keeps on giving. Well, yeah. It's just affirmation of everything she believes about herself. Exactly. But this is where we learn that the most wonderful thing happened. Virginia was able to get another donor. She's a retired Mormon school teacher. The kidney is showroom new. The wildest thing that ever passed through it was Ovaltine. But the whole thing

thing is like this would never happen so this was the other part of my research into the kidney transplant is that like unfortunately if Blanche was not a donor match Virginia would have been put on the list like they wouldn't have found somebody for her like immediately because like the list is three to five years long and this was like a thing that actually upset transplant activists at the time that it was like painting this really rosy picture of like and the world is desperate for people to donate their kidneys and so this was kind of like smoothing that over but we're gonna end it

the sad kidney portion by, you know, doing a Blanche joke, which is the best part. It was that hunk of a doctor who examined me. He's going to be in Florida in a few weeks. Wherever she goes, she meets a man. And Sophia says, soda hookers. Again, a word we would never use now. You could never use it now. No. Blanche is just...

saying that like now, you know, she loves Virginia. She loves her sister. She's so excited that now she's going to get to know her. And isn't it crazy that sometimes you have to almost lose someone in order to realize how much they really mean to you? Let's go out. Let's celebrate life. They all have different ideas of what celebrating... Let's go out and do something crazy. Sophia says, let's fly to Freeport and gamble all night. Ma, we can't afford it. To which Rose says, let's go to Disney World and go on the teacups. Oh, too wild, Rose. Too wild, Rose. Yeah.

Blanche, of course, knows a bar over in Cocoa Beach where they can go pick up over-the-hill astronauts. Okay, now, this is interesting. So this noogie? Yeah, Dorothy. This knuckle noogie? Yes, gives her a noogie. Right, now, if you go back to the opening credits, this woman is in there because of how they're costumed, but Dorothy puts her hands, she throws her hands up.

Oh, interesting. So I'm guessing that the hands up was an outtake of an edit that they didn't use. But it's this moment. Oh, interesting. It's like everyone is wearing the exact same thing. So the chances because they do repeat costumes in this show. For example, in this episode, at one point, Rose is wearing a blue dress with white stripes. Yeah, she wore that on the cruise. Yeah. And in the opening credits, she's in that. So they do repeat costumes.

Which makes sense because they're, you know, not meant to be like wealthy. Right. But I swear what they're all wearing is exactly this moment. Oh, funny. But it's not the noogie. It's the palms up. So I'm sure this was just a different angry take. Yes. Because the noogie looks like it hurts. It looks like she actually pinches her. Mm-hmm.

You know? So anyway, then Rose says, or there's some rocky road in the freezer. They all jump up and scream and run like they haven't eaten in a week. No, it's unbelievable. Like they're just chasing each other down like they're going to run out of the rocky road. In a way that would never happen in real life. And I feel like a lot of the episodes end like this was

Some big moment that would never actually happen. Well, and I will say, just as someone in the business, beginnings and endings are always the hardest. How do you button it? Totally. And just a little mini, mini, miniscule deep dive on Rocky Road ice cream. Oh, please. It originated in Oakland, California, and generally consists of chocolate ice cream, nuts, and whole or diced marshmallows. Ha ha ha ha.

I don't enjoy nuts in my ice cream. I don't like Rocky Road ice cream. Me either. I never have. No. And it was really popular in the 80s. It's like in every show, it's like the big treat. We'll go get some Rocky Road if you're real good. And because of the marketing around it, I couldn't wait to try it. Me too. And I was like, wow, we both had the same experience with Rocky Road. Yeah. Beginnings and endings are the hardest. Like, I don't know.

How's that for an ending? Boy, we both had the same experience with Rocky Road. Dot, dot, dot. That is very funny. Cheesecake, don't go anywhere. Right after the break, I'm going to give my full deep dive on Estelle Getty. Tell them how much they want to hear this. You guys want to hear it so much. You want to hear it more than I want to sleep with Laszlo. We'll be right back.

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All right. I'm so excited to do my deep dive on Estelle Getty. Thank you for letting me have this one. This one means a lot to me. We did really well, I think, about deciding who we wanted to do. Totally. We each did the person I think we wanted to do. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So Estelle Getty was born Estelle Scherr on the Lower East Side of New York City on July 25th, 1923, which is funny because in episode five, 1923 is when in Sicily that pepperoni salesman comes between her and Mama Celeste. Oh my

Oh my goodness.

So they say it was a very typical immigrant family on the Lower East Side growing up experience. But she would describe that, like, she would come home from school and, like, her dad would be working in, like, the front part, like, the commercial part of the apartment. And then the family, like, the mom would be cooking in the back and the kids would be, like, sitting at the table doing their homework. And I'm like, I desperately tried to find an address so we could, like, see if that building was still there. I couldn't find

one. But it sounds either like a unusually large building or a very small cramped situation. I have a suggestion. Yeah. Could we ask the Cheesecakes to maybe research that and get back to us? Cheesecakes. Because someone has the technology to figure that out. If you can find out the building where Estelle Scher, S-C-H-E-R, grew up on the Lower East Side, we'll go down and do a little video in front of that. Wouldn't that be wild? It would be. So,

We learned that from the minute she came out of the womb, basically, it seems like Estelle loved the theater. And she's like us, like you and me. Like, she loved the theater. She said going to see live performance in the city was the one luxury her dad, Charles, made sure the family got to experience. His favorite place to take the family was the Academy of Music on 14th Street. Do you know this building? Yeah. It was an

old opera house that would do operas but they would also show movies and they would do vaudeville and she says her most vivid memory of going to see shows there was early in her childhood it was a night when the whole family went and saw a movie and then saw five acts of vaudeville can you imagine

imagine how amazing that would have been. And she described seeing the joy on the faces of the live performers and the way they were making people laugh. And she said she just knew that that's what she wanted to do. And like the theater and the stage was where she belonged. That makes me so happy because that was very similar to my story. My dad was a teacher and didn't make a lot of money. But every summer, you know, they would have these tickets for families at our local theater. And that's how I got the bug. Wow. Because he prioritized culture. Yes. And it

It feels like that's what her dad did, too. And, like, for them to be growing up in New York City, even in 1923, it was all at their fingertips, you know? Good dad. So she says after graduating high school, she was living at home and she felt a lot of pressure to get a, quote, real job. But she desperately wanted to be an actor. She says her parents were a little bit nervous about that. She says it wasn't the most respectable thing to do on the Lower East Side where gangsters were welcome, but actors were not. Oh, gosh. So well said, Estelle. I love that.

So she finds a secretarial job in the city that would allow her to leave for auditions, usually during her lunch break. But it seemed like it was a cool place that would like, she had a lot of flexibility. She was also a bookkeeper. She could kind of come and go. And this is where she starts taking every theater gig she can get. So looking into her, the legend is that she did so much theater in New York. And I just assumed that it was

so much Broadway and off-Broadway. Not the case. She was doing like local way off-Broadway theater at like La Mama or like local theaters in Queens. Very low paying, if paying at all. She was booking shows constantly and having the time of her life. She even did a stint as a stand-up comedian in the Catskills. Yeah, she did. Right? Like it did not go well. Apparently like women did not work out in those

gigs. It was a very sexist time for women in comedy. You don't say. I know. Only back then. I was going to say, thank God we solved that.

So in 1947, she's at a party and she meets a man named Arthur Gettleman. And she says she was drawn to him right away. And especially she was taken aback by his ability to keep up with her quick wit. It was like the first man she ever met who was like funny and could like really keep up with her in that way. When they were introduced at that party, Arthur proposed on the

spot. It was a joke, but it was also kind of like love at first sight. They get married nine months later on December 21st, 1947. They settled down in Queens and had two sons, Carl and Barry. For the next 20-ish years, Estelle Getty, who would go on to be one of the most famous people ever to be on TV, for the next 20-ish years, Estelle works as a mother and wife at home, keeps that secretarial job during the day, and at night, almost every

every night of the week she was off performing as an actress in some local non-professional production. She loved it. She didn't care if she wasn't going to get famous. She didn't care that she wasn't making money. She would like meet her kids at home after school, make them dinner, set out their nightclothes and then like go off and do her shows for 20,

20 years. Yeah, it's how we all started. It was a hobby. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And you don't think of that because we see her as this incredibly successful professional actress. And we make up a backstory for her. We just assume she came from the theater means that she did 15 Broadway shows. Not the case. This makes me love her even more. I know. So in 1979, when she's almost 60 years old, right, a play called Torch Song Trilogy comes into her life. Now,

Now, I'm not going to cry. Oh, I might cry. Yeah. Torch Song Trilogy, I'm not going to go too deep into it here because I think because it's technically part of the Golden Girls universe because we got Estelle Getty from it, I want to do a deep dive on it all on its own because it means that much to me. This is a play that is very, very, very important to me. But Torch Song Trilogy, it's a groundbreaking play by, at the

time an unknown gay playwright and actor named Harvey Fierstein, which you've said like the Cheesecakes know who he is. He was like the brother to Robin Williams in Mrs. Doubtfire. He's that big, heavy gay guy with that voice that you just know. But he wrote this play. It's a four hour, three act

play that centers around Arnold Beckhoff, a gay Jewish drag queen and torch singer who lived in New York City in the 1970s and the 1980s. And Harvey Fierstein wrote the role of the mother specifically for Estelle Getty. It was one of those plays that wasn't written all at once. It was like he wrote the first part of it and people came to see it. And then he wrote the second part of it and people came to see it. And finally, Estelle Getty, who knew him just from the

scene. Like they knew each other because like he's like in his 20s and she's in her 50s. But she's like an urchin of the New York theater and everyone knows her. She finally says like, all right, hot shot, write a role for me. And he says he's like, I was stuck writing this third playwright.

play and why not give Arnold a mother? So he writes the role of the mother specifically for her. And the play would go from off-off Broadway to off-Broadway to Broadway to touring for four years. And Estelle Getty does the whole thing. She's been there the whole time. It is her

only off-Broadway credit. It is her only Broadway credit. This was the only professional theater she did before booking the Golden Girls. That's just syzygy because we know what's coming up. I know. What are the chances? I can't state it enough. She's basically doing community theater until she books Torch Song Trilogy, which, by the way, was a huge

huge hit on Broadway. It ran for, I think, four years on Broadway. It won the Tony Award. It really is groundbreaking. I can't say it enough. I gotta also say, I'll give myself a little plug. When it went to Broadway, it went to the Helen Hayes Theater. So Estelle Getty made her Broadway debut at the Helen Hayes Theater. When True Crime Obsessed, my other podcast, was the first podcast to play Broadway, we played the Helen Hayes Theater. So Estelle Getty and I made our Broadway debuts on the

same stage. So Estelle Getty stays with the show for the entire seven years it's running anywhere. Broadway and then the tour. Her performance was a total powerhouse. Harvey Fierstein said of her performance, the thing about Estelle was that you couldn't catch her acting. She was just being. If her character was supposed to be angry, Estelle got angry. If her character was broken hearted, the actress was broken hearted.

Aww. Yeah.

So in 1985, Estelle is finishing up the national tour of Torch Song Trilogy. The last stop was in Los Angeles. And the show was a huge hit in L.A. Everyone who was anyone came to see it. And Estelle Getty in particular got a lot of attention for her work. And she started doing a bit of back and forth between New York and L.A. She lived in New York, but she would come back to L.A. for auditions. She was like 60. And that travel is grueling.

And she made it clear that that kind of traveling for work was not for her. So she promised her manager, Juliet Green, that she'd come back out to LA one last time for two months. And it's during this time that she's asked to audition for the Golden Girls because two people had seen her in the play and really wanted her to audition. Tony Thomas, the executive producer, and Judith Wiener, the casting director.

Now, Susan Harris, who created the show, says that she created the character of Sofia Petrillo with no physical type in mind. But according to Estelle's memoir, Estelle remembers hearing that the Golden Girls producers were looking for a, quote, big, fat Italian mama with a bun. And she did not think she was right for this part. She thought she'd be much better for a Dorothy.

Can you imagine Estelle Getty as Dorothy? No. But knowing they wanted her for Sophia, she decided she would do it her way, that she would play her as a tough broad from Brooklyn, and her goal was just to go into the audition and just make them laugh. That's all she wanted to do. Smart lady. So she goes in, and by all accounts, she absolutely...

Absolutely nails the audition. Everyone loves her, especially Tony Thomas. He says she's the one. The only problem is there was a big concern that she might be too young. Like, could she actually pull off playing an 85-year-old woman? And so for her, the casting process takes over a month because they kept calling her bitch.

back. But the only note they were giving her was to not change anything. Can you imagine that? Right. They're calling you back and you're like, please give me a note. Give me anything. What was really going on was like they just needed to convince themselves that she could pull off 85. But they weren't telling her that. Well, she did such a good job. When I found out in real time in the 80s how young she was, I was flabbergasted. I know. She was the

second youngest of all of them. Yeah. Like seeing her, you know, out of makeup. Yes. I couldn't believe it. I know. It was stunning. Yeah. So her manager, Juliet Green, she gets wind that what's going on here is that they need to be convinced that she can pull off 85. I mean, we don't know exactly how many times she went back in, but I'm five, six, seven, 10 times. I know. People just like, don't think like she needs to know she's doing a good job, you know? And they're saying to her, like, you're doing great. Don't change anything. We just, we're not sure yet.

But Juliette, her manager, every time she would go back in, she would add something to make her look older. So they would put powder in her hair or they'd get her a long frumpy dress. And Estelle herself, now there's a purse in the early seasons. It's a wicker purse. And this apparently is like iconic.

And it was Estelle herself who decided that her character, Sophia, needed a purse. She was basing Sophia on people she actually knew in her real life that were that age. And she said, people like that have purses. Their whole entire life is in there, like their medication, their money, everything is in there. Sophia would have a purse. So Estelle goes out shopping, finds this wicker purse, decides that it has got to be part of the outfit for the auditions. And the purse, like it works. It becomes so iconic that the wardrobe department agrees.

like had replicas made just in case of an emergency. That's awesome. So Estelle, of course, gets the job. Sophia is instantly iconic. She'd be nominated for seven Emmys and she wins one time. Now, Harvey Fierstein, after her death, wrote this. At the height of Golden Girls popularity, there was no more beloved character on television than Sophia Petrillo. Estelle Getty, who brought Sophia indelibly to life, was awesome.

awestruck. Quote, I have the highest TVQ score of any woman on television. She said, now remember the TVQ score rates how well-liked an actor is by the viewing public. At the time of the Golden Girls, Estelle Getty had the highest TVQ score of any woman on television. Fierstein writes, it was true for several years, Estelle Getty, formerly Estelle Gettleman of Bayside Queens, was the most popular, likable, and bankable star on any network.

work. She was bigger than Carol Burnett, more saleable than Mary Tyler Moore, and surer to deliver viewers than Cher. A trifecta. Isn't that wild? Was it popular, bankable, and what's the third thing? Saleable, sellable. Like she could have sold a sitcom just by being on it. Yeah. You know, like this is a woman who did 25 years of community theater just because she loved acting. And also what that says, like she nailed her audition. Like she was honing her

acting skills during that time, you know? Yeah. She's a great actress. All that compliments given to her by Harvey about how she's just being on stage and it doesn't have to be on Broadway to gain experience. Yeah. And like, I just had always thought that she had all these decades of years on Broadway. No, it was like local community theater in Queens.

So after Golden Girls, she would go on to play Sophia again in The Golden Palace, which was the one season sort of spinoff that didn't really work. She also played Sophia in 52 episodes of Empty Nest, which was a successful episode. Yeah, which was the successful spinoff of The Golden Girls. She also becomes a bit of a movie star. She gets a supporting role in the Oscar winning film Mask.

She also gets a supporting role in that movie Mannequin starring Andrew McCarthy and Kim Cattrall. And the title role in Stop or My Mom Will Shoot starring Sylvester Stallone, the poster for which has her smiling at the camera while holding a machine gun. Oh, God. I've seen it. You know, before we get to the end, we'd be remiss not to say that it cannot be overstated how much Estelle Getty loved the LGBTQ community.

Q community. And, you know, we've been saying a lot that like Golden Girls premiered right at the beginning and sort of like the apex of the early AIDS crisis when there was no treatment, there was no cure. People were dying left and right. And Estelle coming from the theater had so many friends that she lost, you know, she was deeply affected by the crisis. She lost many close friends and

and family to the disease, including her nephew, Stephen Schur, for whom she was the primary caregiver after he was diagnosed with HIV in the late 80s. Oh, God. You know, in addition to the countless fundraisers she participated in and just like lending her celebrity to the cause, she helped open a hospice for AIDS patients in Greensboro, North Carolina, Stephen, her nephew's hometown, in 1996. It's called Beacon Place, and it's still in operation today. I've heard of that. Yeah. Yeah.

Estelle Getty died in the early morning hours of July 22nd, 2008 in her home in Los Angeles as a result of Lewy body dementia. She was buried in the Hollywood Forever Cemetery where her headstone was inscribed with the words love and laughter and a Star of David to indicate her Jewish faith. I love that. Good job. Thanks. May she rest Estelle Getty. May she rest Estelle Getty.

Cheesecakes. And maybe it's not just plain cheesecakes. Some of you are raspberry coulis cheesecakes, baby. I don't know. You know what? I'm a blueberry cheesecake. Are you a blueberry? I'm a classic New York cheesecake. Give me a nice firm cheese. I get very disappointed when it's too mushy. Oh, me too. I can't believe we're talking about this now, but I'm going to do it. Please. It has to be a graham cracker crust. 100. What are these monsters that do like a cake? You know

what i mean like a pound cake crust or something how were you raised who raised you everybody but them is invited to join the facebook group if you're making your cheesecake without a graham cracker crust and you're in the facebook group i'm gonna ask you to see yourself out but for those of you who are doing it the right way golden girls deep dive podcast discussion group which is not it's like staying out on the lanai it's impossible but join us we're best friends in there it's so fun it's moderated by the amazing sasha it's a very safe space come and make friends share memes be

Yeah. Be a human being. Yeah. And rate and review us on Apple Podcasts. You know, give a little review. You got to click that thing that says write a review. Don't just leave the stars because when you do this, it bumps us up in the algorithm. It helps new people find us. It helps grow our community. Be like my therapy session. Use your words. Yeah.

And follow us. Follow us on Instagram and TikTok at Golden Girls Deep Dive. Also, my cheesecakes. I make another podcast. It's called True Crime Obsessed. I make it with Jillian Pezzavale, who is fun and funny and hilarious. We recap true crime documentaries. We've got something like 400 episodes covering everything you've seen on Hulu and Netflix and Max and everything. If you love true crime or you just love like fun, interesting, funny content, go check out True Crime Obsessed. That's right. Yes. And think.

you for being a friend by telling a friend about the Bethel podcast.

You can't even say it. I'm going to say it for every episode for the rest of my life. I love it so much. Thank you for being a friend by telling a friend. But it's so stupid. Thank you for being a friend by telling a friend. Period. It kind of loses it at the end. It's like, that's the end of the rhyme. Yeah, you're right. Oh, God damn it, Patrick. I mean, it was a great idea, but let me, this is why we're partners. I know. I'm going to come in and edit. You know what? Thank you for being a friend, Jen Samard. You're welcome, idiot.

Cheesecakes, we love you. Thanks for listening. I love you more than Patrick. Bye. Thank you.