F1 Is Wild w/ Ryan Sickler | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
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We have killed generations of people. For golf courses. There's a bomb. Wait, what? You just start panicking. There's a bomb threat. That guy. 100%.

Mom, Dad, I humbly suggest you save some money and shop Amazon for back to school. It's for my growth, meaning my body's growing at an alarming rate. And clothes you buy me this year will be very small very soon. Plus, the clothes I love today will be out of style tomorrow. But at least your wallet doesn't have to be my fashion victim.

Well, folks, it is official. Bert has type 2 diabetes. Make sure you support the American Diabetes Association and help Bert and others fight this terrible, terrible disease. In his place, you guys know him as Sickle Cell. Give it up for Ryan Sickler. Yeah. Yeah.

Hell yeah. From type 2 diabetes to sickle cell. I mean, there's a lot of diseases. A lot of diseases. Yeah, yeah. Do you know, and this is embarrassing to even admit, and I can't believe I'm going to say this to you or your audience, but my last name is Sickler, as you know, and that's why you call me Sickle Cell. But I didn't know just until the last year that someone with sickle cell is actually called a sickler.

No. Yeah, did you know that? No. I didn't either. A doctor told me that. He's like, you know what sickler is, right? And I was like, I just kind of found out it's like what they call people with sickle cell. He's like, yeah. So somebody has it like he's a sickler. Yeah. So you are sickle cell. Yeah. I mean, if sickle cell was a person, I guess. Among emergency physicians, use of the term sickler is associated with negative attitudes towards people with sickle cell disease. Oh, wait. It's people that are sickle cell haters. Yeah, it's haters. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

- It's been a fucking wild year, dude. I go back to being on tour, I remember exactly where I was. I remember I had checked in at this hotel in Perth in Western Australia and you called me from the hospital really distraught, I mean emotional, and you went through this whole horrific ordeal

That like, you know, you thought you were going to die. Yeah, they did too. It's really scary. Yeah. From one surgery to. From one, they called it a procedure. I talk about this in my standup right now. But you'll be out. Three hours and you're going home and you're going to be great. And how long did you end up staying? Almost a month. And I called you. I talk about that on stage calling you. Cause the thing was my phone was dead and they brought me a phone phone. And I was like, huh?

I fucking, this is how I grew up. Yeah. Real phones. Real phones. And I knew everyone's number and I still have numbers in my head like 242-5765-5492-2147. They're still in there. 1573. And today I don't know anyone's cause I don't repeatedly put that pattern in my head. I just do this or, or say this. So,

yeah so you do wait did you use how do you know you know my number no I finally was able to charge oh you did okay but I I was like can somebody bring me a charger because my phone's dead and they were like you and your phone are about to have a lot in common I'll step back I got blue shield silver but it's all gonna be like I got Kaiser Permanente right now it went from I remember I

Surgery, this didn't go right to another. It's like this is all back stuff and then it was like, oh, we got some new shit to tell you about. Got some blood. - Yeah, then the clots happened. My whole lungs clot and then it pushes on my heart. My heart swells up and then I pass out. I collapse in the hospital on the bed and I wake up and they're like-- - And they're like, we need to get you out of here. We need this bed free. - Yeah. - Come on, man. - And then I'm laying on the very fucking thing I went in there for originally for weeks.

so my back is not getting any but look my clots are gone yes what's going to say so now it's healthy how is the back it's it's it should be better can you like do you have restrictions are there things that like yeah i can't i still it takes me i i won't i'll feel pain after a 10 minute walk

A 10 minute walk. So you can't run or anything like that? Oh no, I can't ride a bike yet. I'm not allowed to ride a bike. I was going to ask you that. I'm not allowed to do any of that shit. What's the bike restriction? For the back or for... Yeah, the back. Everything's back now. The lungs and everything are clear. And blood are all good. Everything now is just back. Oh shit, we didn't give you your fucking artwork. Oh, I get artwork. I was looking at Garth's baseball card up there. Is that a fucking thing for your dick right there? What is that hanging?

Looks like a dick hole penetrator. Oh, you're opening this fresh? Fresh. Is this fresh out of the plastic? Fresh for you, my man. Yeah. All five fucking foot six of them right there. Six three right there, brother. This... Oh, I see. It's got a handle on.

You can fuck somebody up with that. Oh, you really can. Yeah. Oh, man. That is pointy as shit, dude. I swing it around the house sometimes with the boys just to keep them in check. Just to let them know. That ain't fucking playing. That's alpha as fuck right there. Yeah. Holy shit, dude. No joke. So. Anyway. All is well. All is well. But the back is the big holdup now. Mm-hmm.

Okay. We'll get there. By the end of the year, I'll be there. Yeah? I think so. Like be able to do more? Yeah. I've been in physical therapy since I got out of the hospital. I've been in PT three times a week. What do they have you do? Three times a week still? For eight months now. And it's all back-related stuff you do? Man, I don't want to bore your audience, but here's what I can't believe I'm learning in my 50s. How to walk properly.

like the way my feet strike the ground. They're like, no, you're, you have, I also have, uh, Charcot Marie tooth disease in my legs, CMT bro. So we're working against all kinds of shit. What is that? That's a disease. It's very common. You can look it up. They call CMT. Um,

It's three doctors, Charcot, Marie, and Tooth. Tooth throws it all off. Don't know why it's in there. Charcot-Marie-Tooth disease. One of the disorders that cause damage to the peripheral nerves. The nerves that transmit information and signals from the brain and spinal cord to and from the rest of the body as well as sensory information such as touch back to the spinal cord and brain. So you have this? I have this. So this is...

Something I was born with. Oh, really? Yeah, this is a hereditary thing. But was dormant or something? Or did you know you had it? No, I knew I had this. So classification of this, too, they always say your calves look like inverted champagne bottles. That's exactly what my calves look like. I played soccer my whole life. I should have tree trunk calves. I don't have the muscle and the layers of muscle in there for that build. And you're kind of close to being, I will never forget, you're going to like this.

So my dad had it and, and his father had it. Yeah. See, I have crazy high arches like that. Like my top, my foot's normal, but my arch is like really high there. Crazy high. Um, so I walk fucked up, you know, sometimes my feet will drag on every step. Yeah. That's like the poster. The poster is the 10 years, 10 years. That's a foot. Yeah. Those are two feet. No, like put the feet up there. That's my show them who we are. I have that.

What about factor five, man? Got that also. That's what I found out later. I had, that's the blood one. I had, that's the blood genetic one that you guys will, willfully gave me by pushing sickle cell on me. He's got, we got a sickler over here in room three. And, um,

So my dad takes us to this study in Hopkins. So it's before I'm six, probably 14 because he died. I'm 16. So it's probably 14 years old. And my younger brother's about 11 at the time. We all go to get tested for this shit. And there you're doing treadmill tests and stuff. And they're doing wicked shit where they're taking needles and they're putting it right in the arch of your foot. Damn. And they want you to, they're testing your reaction as to when you should feel it versus, you know what? You should feel it versus a person with this.

I will never forget. They put needles in between the webs of your toes. And one of the things that hurt the worst is on your outside ankle bone, they take this electric prod and they fucking put it right on that bone. And you're like, ah, like that. And it's how long you took to respond. We got a CMT. He jumped. So my dad, we're all in the room while this doctor's telling us what we have and what it is. And he's like, you're basically a step away from being Jerry's kids.

My dad goes, hey, boys, leave the room. We walk right outside. Just put our ear up on that door. My dad lit this motherfucker up. He did? For talking to you like that? For saying Jerry's kids. He's like, what the fuck do you think you're doing? Who the fuck do you think you're talking to? We're like, oh, yeah. He's getting in trouble like we get in trouble. We're out there dying. Like, oh, dad's going off on this motherfucker. He told us we were all Jerry's kids. That's his bedside manner.

I bet he... I swear. And here, you know what? It might be karma. I can't even remember this. It might be karma because when my parents first got divorced... It's crazy that a doctor said that. He said those words to our faces. And with like, you know, just trying to make you understand where you're at. What's going on? You all should have helmets and straws. Are we Jerry's kids? We let us answer. Yeah.

My dad said, hey, guys, leave the room and fucking just rip this dude apart. But in fifth, so my parents split in fifth grade. So in sixth grade, my mom takes us and we live in this, it's a hallway apartment. Someone just told me recently it's called a railroad apartment or something like that. It's just a hallway with rooms cut off. I live in this dump. And, um,

this kid we meet this you know one of these neighborhood kids you know he's trouble but we're like we don't know anybody we're gonna hang out with this kid and uh he shows up at our door one day with all this fucking change and a couple dollars of cash and shit we're like where'd you get that money he's like oh i just been going door to door telling people i'm collecting for jerry's kids and i go you can do that he goes yeah i'm like are you giving it to jerry's kids he's like no i'm like i'm

can do that so we start going and collect them with them you do we collect so much fucking change for Jerry's kids and we go home my dad sees it he's like where the fuck did you guys get all that money we're like oh man we've been going door-to-door just telling people we're collecting for Jerry's kids he's like are you giving it to Jerry's kids we're like no he's like you can't do that that's illegal and you're gonna get arrested we're like what so my dad tells us that they can fingerprint change

My brother and I dump it all in the tub and we scrub it. My dad is laughing his ass off. We're in there scrubbing these fucking dudes. We had like a five gallon bucket of change. I'm not bullshitting you. We went to Rob's.

We went to McDonald's and we fucking gave it to them for the Ronald McDonald. Oh, you did? Yeah. People were like, these kids are so nice. You know, my dad's like, I'm not trying to go to prison. No, they ain't, man. They're not. They're not good kids. They're like, this money's sparkling. I mean, we were just in there scrubbing change because we thought they could fingerprint that shit. 10 million fingers have been on that shit. That's what you get. It's karma. Now I got that shit for collecting jerrys. That's what you did. You did it. Holy shit, man.

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With an incredible duo sure to take home the comedy gold. Olympic Highlights with Kevin Hart and Kenan Thompson. New episodes Monday, Wednesday, and Friday only on Peacock. I'm glad you're doing better, dude. Thank you. That was a scary time. That was a scary time, but I'm good. Scary time. I'm going to get...

Another test done on my arm. Yeah, we talked about this where you said you might get a little bridge to bridge the tattoo scar. Well, the tattoo... It's two separate scars. So what they're going to do is, they told me... So when I do certain movements, I still feel... How many years has it been now? Two and a half? Almost three, yeah. And you still are fucked up. No, I'm way, way, way... But if I do certain movements and certain weight, I'll be like, oh, I'm fine. And then I get to a heavier weight, and I'm like, oh, I'm not fine. And what happens is you start to...

you know it's a natural thing that anybody would do like you're not even conscious of it your body starts to compensate so right like you just like if i were to like push you this way because the external rotation does it a lot to me i'll just like i'll pivot i won't be able to do it like i would with my right hand and i get these weird like weird sensations when i'm doing certain movements so that what they're going to do is they're going to numb a nerve in my arm permanently

No, but it lasts like six to eight hours. So I won't have any use of my left arm. Oh, no use. Yeah. And when they numb it, they try to isolate the nerve and they scan it. And then they try to see if there's scar tissue around that. Because the idea is that

Maybe what's going on is that I have some compression from scar tissue and then it's just as simple as a small incision, scrape away scar tissue and maybe that pain goes away. - That's exactly what they're telling me about the pain in my back now. It could be scar tissue from the surgery hitting my nerves and they wanna give me two epidurals. - Yeah, so I'm flying out to LA in a couple weeks. - I gotta go do that shit too. - Yeah, but I'll be just like this for like a day. - Just one-armed? - Hey man, let me get a coffee. - You're gonna have it.

You just gotta sling it up, bro. You can't. You should just flip it and lay it everywhere. Don't talk shit to me, man. It's crazy that it stays with you. That's my favorite watch. You gotta drag it back up. You have no power to even pull your own arm back up. I better put everything in my right pocket before that day starts.

Everything. It's going to be that sensation. You know, you fall asleep on your arm. Yeah. Right. You got to wait for it to come alive. I fell asleep on the plane coming here and I had my arms next to the seats. And I guess when I woke up, I couldn't I couldn't make a fist and I panicked for a good minute. Really? I was like, oh, no, no, no. It's the worst sensation. And they're like, prepare for a whole day of it.

Just your dead arm. You're going to feel like you're going to tilt over. I feel like the weight, you won't even feel the weight. I know. I feel like I should just check into a room. You should just sling it up and check in, yeah. Yeah. I'm not looking forward to it. You got to get that one with the stick on the hips. Yeah. Oh, it keeps it up? Yeah, it keeps it up.

For people that don't know, you can watch, Ryan has a special on YouTube called Lefty's Son on his YouTube channel. You can watch the Honeydew. You can do the Patreon. It has the wildest stories that I've ever heard. And you have a new podcast called The Way Back. Really fun. It's just nostalgia. It's old school, talking about growing up and times like that. And that seat in the old school station wagon that faces traffic.

I went and got a nice reupholstered seat. One of those, yeah, yeah. I sit on that. Got my grandma's Afghan on there. Yeah, we talked about M-80s and shit. Talked about firecrackers and BB guns. I should definitely be dead from that. Everyone. Any human that makes it past 16 statistically is pretty amazing. It's pretty amazing. Do you ever think about that like a thousand years ago, maybe less, that people would live to 15? That was it.

That's why when people got married, it was like happily ever after. We're dying at 32. That's it. It's over. I got some shit in my lungs and it's over. There isn't anything for this. I've been sick so many times with sinus infections and stuff. Pneumonia would have wiped us out. You're just going to die. You're going to join everybody who we've ever known and you're going to die. I think about all the time too...

At some point in time, there will probably be, whether it's computers or whatever we can put in our body, but people will be able to live forever. Yeah. As long as you take care of the structure, you'll be able to live forever. And then we become like the dyers. Yeah. People talk about like, oh yeah, my great-great-grandfather died. Yeah, yeah. Like, yeah, he was one of the dyers. I mean, what? You're all still living? I don't want to live that long. No.

If you can be in, here's the, I think they said, Dr. Drew told me this one time. He just goes, men in their 70s. He's like, men specifically, statistically, just all, like more so than women, right? The 70s, like if you can make it through your 70s in relatively good health,

that is, you're an anomaly at that point. Is that right? Yeah. 70s is our threshold. Oh yeah. I mean, average, you know, it keeps bumping up because of technology, medicine, lifestyle and everything that we learned. But, you know, every, like now we're at that age where, you know, a lot of friends, parents are sick and like almost every time I'm like, how old are they? The guy, it's always 72, 74. So it's all, that's like, I mean, that's,

sort of in the average lifespan, but the average lifespan, like I said, keeps bumping up. But I feel like if, man, if you could have a good run in your 70s to enjoy that decade of life,

I mean, I hear about people even into their 90s. I'm like, you have to be shitting me. Yeah, I mean, I don't. My Aunt Helen lived in her 90s. She was also blind in one eye. Half her jaw was missing from surgery. You know what I mean? No, thank you. Like, quality of life. I'll take 65 over 95. Fucking. Being in pain every day. Is that the aunt that shit on the walls? That's my grandmother.

Well, when you say it like that, though. That did happen. But she didn't just go around people's homes shitting on walls. That was at a public place, though, right? She and a cousin, older cousin...

shared a birthday. Uh-huh. And so they would just go out for coffee. She's older at this time in her 60s. They would go out for coffee on their birthdays and just celebrate, her and Jimmy, celebrate their birthdays. And they went to this old school place in Baltimore called White Coffee Pot. It's like this little face and guy had a little tongue sticking outside. Mm-hmm.

and it was like a little diner spot, and they go in there. They're having coffee and breakfast, and she's like, oh, my God, my stomach's rumbling. I'll be right back. So she goes to the bathroom, and she said she squatted over the toilet, and she shit, and she said when she turned around, she was just mortified that it was all over, like nothing went in the toilet. It was sprayed all on the wall, and she's like, oh, my God, we got to get out of here.

So she cleans herself up, and as she's running out of the bathroom, the lady to come clean it is coming in. And she said she panicked. And she's like, I don't know why I said anything, but I just went, some sick son of a bitch in there did that. It's disgusting. And then she runs out and grabs Jimmy. And he's like, I'm not done with my breakfast. She said, I'll get you some fucking breakfast somewhere else. We got to get out of here. We're not coming back to the little town again. A brown coffee pot. Oh, fuck. Yeah.

So it's stories like that. The whole show is, and it's not a long one, man. It's like 30-minute pods. The way back, yeah. Yeah, I don't want to sit and do two hours anymore. We do that with all the other pods and stuff. This is just a fun, quick hitter. We've already got Gaffigan recorded, Norman, Joe List, so many people. There's like 15 episodes already. Already in the bank. That's nice, man. So you'll be ready to go for like a whole year. That's it. Rip them for a little while and have fun. They'll be right on my YouTube and all that.

Dude, I had the craziest adrenaline rush. I was so keyed up on adrenaline that I needed to take a day down for my body to decompress. Well, that's what I learned with you after that Vegas shit. I thought that would amp me up so much. Like, yeah. And it just, all that adrenaline coursing at once. And then I fell asleep on the ride home. Yeah, yeah. I was so... Because you're so alert. And mentally that night, I legit was...

I don't know, maybe half a second. I felt like half a second off. - You're talking about we went to a track and we drove, we like, you know. - You drove. They drove me back, bro. They drove me back. - But I also remember when you, we went to one of those places where you could pick exotics.

And you picked one and you're like, I want the most, like the bad-ass shit. And that guy was like, you don't want this one. You want this one. Yeah. I wanted the one. And he was like, nah, you want this one. And it ended up being a race car. It was an STO, I think. It was like the Lamborghini STO, but like the race spec. And he were like, I'm going to throw up.

I kept telling the guy, I'm going to throw up. He's like, don't throw up in here. He's getting real nervous. And I'm like, look, I'm good on the straightaways. It's when you tell me to go from 132 to 35 in these S turns, it's fucking with me right now. He's like, watch the, what was it? It was not your gravity, but your... Your RPMs? No, on the dash was your... Oh, what's the fucking word? I'll think of it later. But not your...

It was just the way the car handled. You know what I'm talking about? I can't remember the name of the damn thing. But he's like, you can watch it right there on the screen. So doing that, looking in here and shit, I was like...

It's also 120 in the car. And we have a GoPro footage of it. Yeah, there's a GoPro. And then coming around the turn, I go, no, bro, I'm going to throw up. And he goes, okay. And I'm trying to pull off the track, but I'm so close to puking. But I also have a helmet on and everything. And he's yelling at me because I'm not in that lane. I'm still kind of on the main track. And he's screaming that we're going to get like –

equilibrium yeah that's what it was okay okay and uh i'm like i can't anymore bro i can't i just gotta and i flipped the helmet you're like i'll drive back he's like no i open the door and i'm just breathing and i'm hear him over there going yeah we got one that uh gonna throw up over here i'm like oh god and you had paid for 10 laps i'm on lap five and i'm like i'm done he's like you got five more i was like no i don't no i don't and i'm just i never throw up i'm breathing i'm like

all right i'm good let me drive back the thing he's like you're not driving and they brought the fucking minivan of shame and it was only like 50 feet they fucking drove me back that's hilarious and i went in you're like did you have fun i was like i uh i didn't i had a it was fine it was fucking great and then i was like make sure you get your money back i did half they did they did give me i was i thought they were gonna pull some okie doke shit on me but they were like yeah we'll give you half back

That's because he knew he upsold me. Yeah. But man, I don't know how you do it because like I said, I'm good in straight lines. Yeah. It's those, even carnival rides. I'm good up, down and shit like that. Any of that shit, no man, I can't fuck that. I always send you carnival footage. Yeah. It's my favorite. We start talking about that, about how crazy...

Do you want to know what just happened? What? So I took my daughter to the Santa Monica Pier, went with my buddy Jim and his daughter. The four of us go down, make it like a little dad-daughter night out. We're down there hanging out, and they want to ride the rides, but I can't ride rides. But I can ride the fucking Ferris wheel, and they got a monster Ferris wheel down there, right? So we get on, and two days later, there's a report of a dude that free climbed up the middle. You know how big that is, right?

Look up that Santa Monica, it's called, it says like the Pacific Pier or Pacific Wheel or something, right? It's a monster fucking Ferris wheel. This dude climbed up to the middle of it. There, after scaling it, right there's the story. That thing. Oh my God. He climbed up to the middle of it freehand. Oh, there he is. With a backpack on. Look at him. And then said he had a bomb.

They had to clear the whole pier, like all the way out to Santa, like the whole pier. Everybody had to go. He didn't have a bomb.

And then like two days later, they shut the pier down. Look at him. I was on that. Do you know how pissed off I'd have been if the only ride I could get on? Cause you know how they made the people get off? No, they wouldn't run it cause they were scared. They, they craned them off. So the people that were stuck at the top had to get on a crane and be lowered down. Fuck that. I would have been furious if the only ride I could ride after all this shit's that, and this guy did that. Look at him. Oh my God. That's fucking crazy. Also, also how, like how you learn, uh,

Like when you're in it, they're like, get on the crane. And you're like, I don't want to put me down. And they're like, there's a bomb. And what? Like you just start panicking. Wow. There's a bomb threat. That guy. And then the crane just going right next to the bomb, by the way. Now your face is there. There it is. There's someone on the crane. Look at it. I'm telling you, dude. I would say, nope, no, no, no. You wheel this motherfucker. I'll take my chances. Oh my God. Look at that, dude.

That's insane. And that's not just some carnival ride. That's a landmark, for God's sake. I wonder what kind of charge that is. Well, you got terrorism because you say you got a bomb. So that's in there. There's a lot of charges probably going on in that. Trespassing. Look, they got the arrow. Look at him. Who's up there taking that? Is that the crane guy? It's just a dude out of work, too. He's just like, I haven't been doing shit in a while.

I need to go do something today. That's all planned out, everything. Fuck. Who got that picture? Because if that's the crane operator, I'd be like, bro, pay attention. Stop snapping selfies over here. Fucking lower my ass down. Shout out to Philip Lee. So Philip is a chef.

Michelin star chef, lives here in Austin. He has Sushi by Scratch, which is in a bunch of cities now. - Is that where you and I went? - Yeah. - So he's down here with that as well? - Yep, and he opened Pasta Bar here, that's him right there. So he's like, hey, I'm doing some shit for Red Bull, do you wanna come on F1 weekend? They're hooking all this up, and I was like, fuck yes. So we go to this event they have at Oracle first, where,

We're standing there and they're doing like promotional stuff. And then you just see over the horizon a helicopter come into view and it's carrying an F1 car. And I'm like, you've got to be shitting me. Yeah. Look it up. F1 Red Bull car in Austin flying. Like the guy flew it through like down. It was actually really crazy to see in person. Like.

- You just seen it come in, and it's just hanging? - Yeah, on a chopper. Yeah, and that's it right there, bro. This guy flew it around. Brandon, that's his name. I met him after. I was like, I wanna meet the chopper pilot. I don't give a fuck about any of these drivers after this. This is the craziest thing I've ever seen.

So he flew that through the city and then lowered it into the promotion site at Oracle. It was really impressive. I mean, what a fucking... They're the best at promotional stuff. I was going to say, what a billboard. What an advertisement for what's going on. What the hell is that up? That's an F1 car. Yeah, it's an F1 car. That's nuts. That was day one. Then the next day, we fucking... He's like, meet me at this. We go to a gun range.

Park and the Red Bull chopper lands behind the range and flies us. You see the chopper? This is like this. They have it all wrapped up.

But they just pick us up in that. In that? Oh, I wouldn't go in that. That's an R44. It's great. Those are great. Nope. He just took the doors off. I'd just be waving at your ass up there. I'd be like, have fun, Tom. Talk to you about it on the podcast. We flew. You got in that? Yeah, we flew out to this place. How many people's we in there? It looks like it fits two. There's four of us. That one we were in was tiny, and there were five of us. Which one? The one we flew to Santa Monica to the San Bernardino. Oh, nice.

No, that was bigger than this. Yeah, I'm saying. And I felt like that was tight. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, no, this was. That looks tiny. That looks like a trash can. Look at it. It does. It's got one fucking blade going up there, too. That's it. No, hell no. It was great. He flew us to this place.

And when we flew, we landed here, we get to start rally drive. This is a place called. Wait, so did you shoot at the gun range first? No. We just get it. We just they're just letting us letting them pick us up there. Then we fly here and we get to drive rally cars in like dirt tracks. You know, say off road rallies. So at first it was Subarus. And then they put us in this thing. Yeah. What is this? This is a all new. It's made by Sierra Cars. And that's Philip in there. It's all electric.

That's electric? Yeah, see, the Subarus are behind it, so we drove those first. That weighs 1,200 pounds, that car that he's in, and it has 300 horsepower. Get the fuck out of here. Yeah. That has 300 horsepower. 300 horsepower. I mean, it's just... Like, that's how it feels, and you're just skimming through dirt. I think about this all the time. There was some farmer back in the old days with one horse pulling his shit, and there's an asshole in the neighborhood next to him with 300 of them pulling his shit. Like, how you doing, man?

that's that that's the equivalent 300 horses yeah yeah that is nuts dude how fast does that go i mean i don't know what the actual can they hit 100 and shit easy that's me right there and i think like it's just right out of the gate you just kind of is it just oh it's like it just starts zipping you know um is it easy to drive yeah it is actually

Like, does it handle better the more you really get into it and shit? It does, and there's a handbrake too, so you can use the actual brakes that come with it, or you can do the... There's the next one here. The next video of this has... Yeah, this is me coming around, and you hit the throttle, and then you pull the handbrake,

Oh, and that makes you do the turn. Yeah, yeah. You start to like kind of. Oh, I see. So you're handbraking on your turns. Mm-hmm. And there he is. And there he is. He was chasing us. He was chasing us. Yeah, I swear to God. I swear to God. And then there's one of the super, he was chasing the cars. What's that coming out behind him right there? That's a drone. Oh, it is. But then, dude, it was so much fun. And then by the way, the prep for this was just like, have fun.

That's it? They gave us help. Just buckle up. And they're like, just go. It was so much fun. We got to drive Broncos off-road in those woods back there on this trail. Damn, dude. Yeah, it was so fun. Then they had another course where they had Red Bull drivers, like sponsor drivers. So we got in the Cam Am. You know what that is? Like that two-seater...

Is that like the off-road thing? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And they had a seven-time world champion named Mia Chapman go, pull up her Instagram because the first video on it is from that day. I'm not in it, but this is what, that's her right there driving that. And here, put your headphones on. This is her driving? She's driving you, so you get to ride with her. Jesus Christ, look how fast they're going. Yeah, this guy's like...

And she's just giving lines on this thing. Dude, we're jumping. She's jumping. You rode with her? Yeah, yeah. It was unreal. She's hitting jumps right there? Yeah, dude. And everybody's going through that. Like, what you hear there is the same way everybody feels. Everyone's like, oh, my God. Look at her jumping over that shit. She's hauling. Oh, yeah. And that's, she said she's driving at, like, 40%. Because she's got passengers here. Like, real dialed down. That's dialed down? Yeah. Yeah.

It was so much fucking fun. - That looks so much fucking fun. - So we do that for hours. Then they take us to COTA and we watch the practice runs.

Then we go back here. God damn, you all day with them? Yeah, and then they flew us on the chopper again. Nope. The garbage can. I would have said, ride me back in one of those. And they flew us to the range. Then we went shooting on the range. When you got back. When we got back. Then we went out to dinner. Then we went out to a party. How long of a day is that? It was a full fucking day, dude. God damn, dude. It was a full day. All adrenaline. I feel like I'd be asleep at the dinner. Well, the next day, people were like, you want to go to this thing? I was like, no. I'll bet. We literally took the whole day down. Like, just...

chilled out, recovered, and then the next day was the race day. So then we took a chopper there, a different one, a little bigger. I think we have video from that. Yeah, so this is going to the race. So we got to like, that's COTA right there. - That's the track. - Yeah, you're seeing people like come in and they let, it's cool on the other video of it, you can actually see like the whole layout of the circuit.

It's fucking this one right here. So this is like, this is us pulling up and this is race day. So it's like, you know, it's just starting to get super congenial. There's so many people, you know, there's like over a hundred thousand people here, but yeah, they just fly you. We fly right to the track and then card us over. And then we got to sit, we got, we had so much fucking incredible access that

Like we got to go at the Chairman's Club on turn two, which you can kind of, you see people come around turn one, turn two, three, four, and you whip around and you can see 12, 13, 14. Like it's incredible. What's their top speed? What are they hitting? Those guys on the back straight will hit like 210, 215. I went to the Indy 500 one time years ago.

Like early 2000, maybe something like that. Might've been 2000. And Danica Patrick was racing that time. She crashed. She crashed? She did that day. I don't know if she crashed or they crashed her. Oh, really? Yeah. Cause that was back when she was doing that. Everyone's like, what is she doing here? Yeah. Yeah. And I just remember we had pit passes and we were able to go down right in the pit. And I just remember standing there and just looking straight ahead and just watching the car go by, like to see how much of it I'd see. And it was,

It was like, it sounded like bumblebees on steroids just going right by you. It's so impressive to see. Yeah, and then they're not just driving that thing. They're getting right on each other's asses, moving inside lanes, outside, everything. You'll see them inches apart. Inches. Yeah, inches apart. At 150, 60 miles an hour. It's really impressive to see. And those cars are spaceships. F1 cars are fucking spaceships. Are they? Yeah.

They're so ridiculous, man. They're so insane. Well, and can't you now, like... Oh, yeah, this was... I don't know how you don't cheat, but can't you now listen to them? Like, can't you, like...

you get like a headset and you can listen in, they were saying, to the pit crews and stuff. - I don't know, I mean, that's probably-- - You can do that, how come another team can't? - They pipe in on the broadcast. Like if you watch the broadcast, you'll have the commentators and then they'll take you to an exchange. So they'll be like, here's Hamilton talking to the pit about something and you'll hear the driver be like, ah, he's going off the grid and like, you know,

- What do these people weigh, too? What's the weight, a healthy weight to get hauled? - Daniel Riccardo was here and he said that you don't wanna weigh anything over 160. - Damn. - Yeah. - They're all that little? - And also, their margins for giving up, 'cause everything's about weight at that level, and fractions of a second are the difference. A second is an eternity.

Like, if you start to weigh over that, you're giving up something that they would rather not because you're just weighing more. You know, it's going to hold you down that, like, that minuscule amount. They told us, too, that they gave us a tour. And there's a room, like, fucking three times the size of this room of just, like, computer towers. And they're like, yeah, this is for when they're driving. The car is sending...

back to engineers in each of their home countries. Nah. In real time, and then those engineers are analyzing, sending the information back about adjustments that need to be made. In real time. They're doing it in the car itself? In the car, or when they pit. Or tell these guys, hey, this is what he's... Little stuff. Nah, dude.

Yeah, they're analyzing it to that degree. All right, so what's the fastest you've ever had before you got all these nice cars and shit? What's the fastest you ever hit a car on the road? Hit a car? No, not hit. I mean, what's the fastest you ever hit driving a car on the road? Oh, probably like in the 130s. Damn, what was it? A Ford Mustang GT. Oh, yeah. Yeah. The 5.0 back in the day. Yeah, yeah. And then I drove a...

a 986, like a earlier model came in

like that i had in la probably like 135 coming back at night on what like the 405 on the 101 like coming from like oxnard yeah oh out there yeah yeah but then i don't i don't try i really don't go like on whenever you're in a car like a performance car there's always someone who wants to race you and they always come up and like either they make a signal or they rev their engine and it's always a guy like in a honda or something who's like what's up bitch like like i'm good like i don't want to

be dangerous on there, especially now that I have the ability to go to these places where you get to do it. But won't a Tesla wipe anything off the road these days anyway? Well, from a... It's like starting a... Just stock car on the streets. Especially zero to 60. Yeah, it'll crush. Yeah. Once you get like...

moving though. You got to catch up to it first. Yeah. Yeah. Those things are lightning. I mean, it is crazy that you can just buy one. There's so, it's so crazy that someone can be like, here's a check. Can I have a metal box that goes zero to 60 in 1.9 seconds? And drives itself. Yeah. And drives itself. And they're like, yeah, go for it.

There's no tests. No special drivers. They don't make you fill out a form. There's no background checks for that shit. I mean, this is a fucking missile. Yeah, it is a missile. There should definitely be a background check to get a test. I did drive a friend's car at that track. Most of the cars I bring are... An F1? Yeah. Well, not an F1, but at that track, at the Koda track. I drove my friend's car, which is automatic. I bring mostly manual cars there.

his is automatic which is so much so much faster and can sit like on that back straight I hit 170 damn yeah but that was I couldn't do it in one of mine his was just so so I mean the fastest I've ever hit in anything is that car in Vegas was one I feel like I don't know what it was 140 50 somewhere in there that's fucking then we break down to 30 and my stomach was a fucking car dude you know what my so my cousin came my cousin came

For this whole weekend. That was the fun part. It's like, Phillip invited us. And also, I gotta give a shout out to Peter Attia, who is a fucking obsessed fan. Like, I thought I liked cars, and it's like, no, I guess I don't. Because, like, his level, he's super, super in F1. He gave us tickets to...

in the turn 15 grandstands, which is amazing. - Is that the best one? - It's probably, I think it's the best grandstand view you can get. You see people come all the way back down that stretch and you see them go through 12, 13, 14, 15 into the carousel. So you really get to see a whole portion of it and you get to see them do that shit like speed. That's actually turn two. So those guys, yeah, it's really like,

They're like fucking spaceships, dude. But the tickets he hooked up were unbelievable. Unbelievable. But my cousin was visiting and he works in, that's him there, Juan Luis. Shout out to Juan Luis. When we were at rally school there. He was telling me that, you know, he's from Peru, but he does a lot of work in Mexico. And so we're always like, oh, what's that like? Because he has to go to like all the regions because it's in agriculture.

"Do you ever worry about the cartels?" He's like, "Nah, everything's cool." They always tell you, "Just don't go there and don't be there after sundown." It's all part of that world. But he was saying that he was in Sinaloa on a week where the government had gotten a hold of one of the cartel guy's family members. Might have been Chapo's son. And so they sent in

all the federalists, all the cops, for a presence. The police are here. And on that weekend, a military chopper flew into the city. And he's like, so you know, everybody, all the citizens are like, oh, wow, the cops are here. Look at this. And as that chopper was up there,

a fucking missile came out. Nah. Blew it up. So he's like, the cartel guys had like anti-aircraft. No. Yeah. And they were waiting for that helicopter to come and do that. Blew it out of the sky. Blew it out of the sky. Yeah. So everyone's like, oh shit. Ha ha.

How are the tomatoes? How are the tomatoes coming? All right. Go back to my farm. That's crazy. Well, I remember like anti-aircraft. I know. It's crazy, dude. I don't know if it's the same weekend that he was talking about. I remember sometime in the last 24 months,

They got a hold at one time. The government got a hold of El Chapo's son. And didn't they let him go pretty quick? Well, because the cartel just came down the mountain in tanks, started firing at the police in tanks, and then they were like, you can take him back. Yeah, you can have him. That's nuts. Yeah, dude. Tanks, and they can't do anything about it. Nothing we could do about it, yeah. They were just like, you got it. We'll give him back. Could you imagine if the National Guard flew over like...

And then someone shot it down. And they'd be like, we're not going to do anything to you. Oh, hell no. Yeah. That's how big of a presence that is. That is a big presence. Yeah. It's not like a hundred guys, you know. I don't know if you remember me telling, this is a while ago. I wrote and produced on this piece. It was a Ferrari racing club. Uh-huh.

It was basically, it wasn't basically, it was these guys. They're all rich dudes. I mean, these guys like... That shit's so expensive. Oh, man. Those clubs are so... They all own their own Ferraris. Yeah, and they have support teams. They have support teams. So what they did was, the guy I worked with, his name was John, and he was a young, good-looking dude, and he was an attorney for Philip Morris, I think, or against Philip Morris, I think it was, and then won all these cases.

So he had fuck you money. He owned a mansion in New Orleans. He had the original land speeder from Star Wars, and he would drive it to work. No. Yeah, he would drive it to work. New Orleans is one of those cities that are like, yeah, you can drive that. Yeah, people see you like, oh my God, it's a fucking original land speeder. He had the original R2-D2 NC3PO. He would license those out to Universal and just make money off that as a revenue stream.

He then... Remember the first...

black gold rim Lamborghini Countach poster when we were kids, like all the rage. He bought that one, that one, the one in the poster, that one. Yeah. He went and got that one. He had every year of every Ferrari ever made every year of whatever it was. And one of the things he'd say, he would go to Italy and he'd come back on his private jet. And he said, I would, I'll take a model. I'll bring them back with me. And I'll tell him straight up, like,

I got a Wednesday, Thursday. If you want to come back and fucking hang out Monday, Tuesday, you can. And he's like, they get right on the private jet. They go back. He says before they land, he has a control. This is before. This is good. I don't know how many years ago.

He would set the lights in the pool and the house. He could put the temperature on everything. He said he could operate C3PO, and he'd have him come over and act like he was lifting up their dress a little bit. And he'd be like, oh, C3PO. He'd do that shit. This dude was loaded. Yeah, it was a good game. So he also owned a Ferrari, and he told me that owning a Ferrari, a real Ferrari part of it is like owning a horse at a stable. It stays in Italy forever.

At the track. I know someone who did that. And he said, I'm only allowed to drive that car when I fly to Italy, and I'm only allowed to drive it on that track. It's mine to be driven there. But they all loved cars so much that he got about, I don't know, it was probably about 12 or 15 rich fucking dudes. They all had their own Ferraris, and they picked six tracks here in the US and basically tried to simulate what was going on in Italy here. And they would do each track twice. So you got 12 tracks, but you're doing Jersey twice, like...

like Tampa twice or whatever. And these dudes had so much fucking money. And I had so much fun, so much fun watching them drive. And then a couple of them crash them and they go off because they're not, you know, they ain't a racing team. I sit down, I taught this one dude, we're in Jersey. I go, what are you doing after this today? He goes, oh, I'm going to hop on my private jet and fly back. I'll be home in like 20 minutes. Kids will swim in the pool. I go, Jesus Christ.

You live in Manhattan? He's like, yeah, yeah. I go, how'd you get your money? Because I'm interviewing these guys. How'd you come up with your money? He's like, oh, my father owns 10 skyscrapers in New York. I'm like, buildings. He's like, yeah, my dad owns buildings. Okay, that'll do it. Okay, yeah. Yeah, I know a guy who drives in a Porsche GT3 club, and he said on his...

weekends he'll go through 15 grand in tires i don't know tires yeah just on tires my god yeah and i met i met another dude that's a lot of fucking money on tires in a weekend this dude i don't know if i've ever spent that much on tires in my lifetime this so far i'm trying to do this is a weekend tires yeah this dude because you know you never know who you're talking weekend tires you know you never know yeah and so

Somebody said something. I was at a party. Tom likes cars. He's like, oh yeah, I like cars. I was like, yeah man, what kind of cars you got? I tell him a couple things about you. He's like, yeah. He's doing it really unassuming. I got this one, I got this one. That's a good car. He's like, yeah, I got...

A couple that I keep in Italy. And I go, you keep cars in Italy? He's wearing like a Hawaiian shirt, right? He looks like he's fucking there to change the ice. I was like, what? He's like, yeah, I keep that one in Marinella. I go, you keep your cars there? He's like, just for when I go there and when I drive, you know, just to have it. And I was like, okay, this dude's pretty serious. And then...

I'm talking to somebody else and they're like, oh yeah, he's a billionaire. I was like, oh yeah, that's clear now. Billionaire. He keeps his cars in Italy. Yeah. Just for fun. Yeah. Yeah. That's big time. Big time cash. 15 grand in tax. God damn. It's so much money. God damn.

Yeah, some of those dudes, I don't know if some of those guys will travel and drive with a crew, like their own pit crew. Oh, they had their own, like the trailers they owned too, to transport the car. I'm like, you guys fund all this? Just for fun. I'm like, you still have money left over? And they're like, yeah, we're just doing this for fun.

It's basically their equivalent of some dude's golf weekends. With all the finest gear. Yeah, yeah. That's what these guys do. That's their version of it. Yeah, you really got to back up a truck, though. And there's nothing coming in. It's all money out. Oh, yeah. They're not getting sponsored. No, no one's paying you for shit. You could be the fastest guy that day, and you just get a high five. Dude, the one guy, he was my favorite dude. He had this black and gold car and...

It was a Latin phrase on it, and I can't remember exactly how it went, but it translated to, I come in peace ready for war. And that's on his car, and I was like, fuck it. I just love that fucking motto. And I go, where'd you get your money? Like, what's your family business? And his family business was, he was, I think he was British? No, he was Italian. What am I saying? Duh. And his family were jewelers.

who worked with the Italian royalty. Oh, Jesus. Yeah, so he's busting out watches for us to see. Like, we can't touch and shit. Yeah, he can look at it. Yeah.

Yeah. For the Cavalry show. He's like, I'll get a couple for you. I'm like, Jesus. But like you say, his jewelry shop was the sponsor. Yeah. It wasn't like fucking 76 or Arcos coming in and throwing money at these guys. It was all money out. You met a dude whose money came from the latches on planes, on the doors. Come on. He made the latch. Because you think about that. You're like, there's always things you go...

Then you go, well, someone's got to make it. And then all the planes are like, yeah, we need that latch. That's what he makes. You know, that's what his company makes. I got one for you. A guy I used to work with swore to us that a girl he dated's grandmother, you can look this up if you want, because I think it was a lady.

You know that little plastic pizza tray, the table that comes in your pizza so the lid doesn't hit the cheese? Yeah. That little thing? Yeah. That's her. They made that. Gazillions of money. Really? Gazillions of dollars. I mean, because you think about it, if you're going to mass produce those, they're probably less than a penny to make. They're just a little plastic thing. Sure. And that lady fucking... That thing. Yeah, that little table right there. Somebody made that. Mm-hmm. I was like, yeah, I'd give it to you for three cents.

Is it an old lady? Oh, look, the fundraiser. Yeah, there she is. That lady of Argentina. Yeah, there you go. That lady did that fucking thing. Somebody did that, right? Yeah, somebody had to do it. That's got to make her gazillions of dollars. The patent was filled. Oh, look at that, though. It was filed in 83. Oh, Carmela of Dix Hills got a similar one, so that might be who he knows. Failure to pay maintenance fees in 93. That's what you get, man.

Wow. Yeah, there's things like that you never consider. I also learned about how they were telling me how you think cartels are ruthless. They go in Latin America. The real crazy thing now is mining. What do you mean? People, there's gold mines. Oh. And the families that control that, they're like, they make gold.

They make cartels look like Girl Scouts. I'll bet. That kind of money. Yeah. Because they'll come in there and just wipe out a fucking indigenous community. And they dig and do what they want. And it's so much money that it gets ruthless. Yeah. Met one of those guys, too. You met him? Yeah. Well, how'd you meet this guy? Just family. Through your family, you met this guy? Yeah. And they just wipe out towns and shit? And he's a real jovial guy, too. I'll bet. He's like, how you doing? Ha ha ha.

It's good to be here. Fuck those people. We have killed generations of people. For golf courses. That's fucking crazy. It's pretty wild. And it really is like being a Saudi prince or something. If you have a gold mine that produces. Oil, any of that shit. That kind of money. Fuck. Yeah. Scary though.

Because they end up controlling entire regions. Yeah, regions. And the business that flows in and out. And then they just get, in those communities, they just also put the government on payroll. So like judges, cops, everybody's like, yeah, man, dig wherever you want. Yeah, I'll sign that. I'll sign that. No problem. Yeah, pretty wild. That's scary shit. I think about...

I was a big fan of Deadwood back in the day on HBO, that series. It's partially rooted in history and what's the family that lives up. It's got the family.

The Hearsts. The Hearsts up in Northern California with that Hearst Castle and shit. Oh, right. They were the newspaper people, right? Yeah, and they came in, and the way they made their money, if I remember correctly, was there was all this gold out there, and it was, I believe, the Black Hills of South Dakota, and they would come in and scare people and just say, hey, the government's going to come. They're going to make this place like every other state

And you're not going to get the money you're supposed to get for that. So how about I give you

two million right now two million back then oh my god yeah and we'll call it even and they would take that and then he'd have a literal mountain of gold that was worth gazillions you know and he's buying off these people and that's how they just started stacking their money once they started doing that they started buying towns and banks and shit like i'll buy your bank then yeah and then they go like i'm buying a bank i just own everything yeah i just take it all hearst town yeah

Yeah, you don't get to be someone like that, being a nice person. Hell no. No. No, man. I've always vibed with that old mafia mentality. Like, I did a report on when I was young and that the Valentine Day Massacres, just that whole, he wiped out the top guy and then sent the biggest fucking bouquet of flowers to the whole funeral.

You know what I mean? Like I've always loved that mindset. Like, there you go. There you go. Did you ever do the, uh, Alcatraz tour? I did. I still remember cause I, I think I was the only person that laughed on the tour that they took us to the hospital wing and they were like, so Capone had, well, he had fucked up some guy and the guy was in bed recovering and, uh,

They said Capone went to tickle his feet so that the guy, because the guy was in pain. He's like, stop. And then they go and Capone punched him in the stomach. While he's laying there and you laugh. I laughed and they were like... I was like, it's a funny thing to imagine, right? I have pictures of me in black and white sitting on the toilet in there and stuff. Yeah. You go in the cell. But I'll tell you this. I really did have a weird feeling at Alcatraz. I've had it a couple times. It's a weird feeling. And...

We got there, and originally, right when you get on the little island there, there was a Native American indigenous tribe that was speaking on whatever they did to them or something. I don't even know. I'm ignorant. It's so crazy that someone could escape from there, that water. Oh, and shark infested, cold. That's a hell of a distance. Look at that distance to anywhere.

But when we got out in the yard, did you go out to the yard? Yeah. That's where I felt like people had been shanked and everything out there. I felt a dark presence out in that yard. Look at that. When you see it from that angle, too, that we're right there, I think that's the most kind of intimidating one. Because...

- So, oh yeah, is there one, only one escape? Like that, that, that-- - Successful? - Successful? - I think so, but they also don't never, they don't know if that guy drowned or what. But I think a few people got out of there, or tried to get out of there. - Did the three-- - Three. - The three men did escape the island, but most likely drowned. Oh, so they don't consider them to be, who escaped, how about who escaped successfully? Is it just the, oh, and they're assuming that they all drowned? Wow. - But they got out though, which is nuts. - It's nuts.

Yeah, I have that. Escaping prison stories are always insane. And the tunnels they have to go. Like, I would freak out in there. I'd make them come get me. You know what I mean? I'd be like, I can't get out of there. I can't climb through a tunnel. I scrape with a spoon. Look at this story. John Anglin allegedly wrote a letter to the San Francisco police in 2013. Wow.

He was the only one still living, the writer claimed. Well, yeah, but it's a letter. How do you know that that's the guy? I mean, how do you know it's coming from him? Like the D.B. Cooper type shit? Yeah, yeah. That story is amazing, too. That is great. Did you watch that whole? I did. Yeah, that was great. I did. I think that dude is him, too. Which one? The one that they were saying they thought was him? That died? I think the guy that died is D.B. Cooper. Yeah. Not the one still living. I don't think so. It was so compelling to watch. It was. And the funny thing is those yearly...

Like Comic-Con type things where they all get together. But how about like back then? What year did he do that? What year does it say? 71. I wouldn't trust a parachute in 1971 or kicking open the door of a plane in 1971. An airliner? Fuck no, man. Yeah. That's crazy.

I'd love to be able to do something like that and get away with it, though. It'd be fun. It'd be fun if you got away with it, but you'd be waiting your whole life. Because you know somebody somewhere, some young 20-year-old something that's like, I'm going after this. Don't you think that a robbery would be like robbing a banker or a museum would be such a thrill? Yeah, a bank would be. I wouldn't care about the museum development.

the bank would be the museum would just be like the fun yeah but the bank you got you're scaring more people so if that's really what you're into you gotta feel like you got a bunch of them there yeah because the the whole thing with the uh museum is you want to do it without alerting right right so it's got to be secret shit yeah but it's just fun to know the bank you're going in the opposite yeah you're not going in the same way you know it's give me all your fucking what um who was the guy that got caught in santa monica

Oh, Whitey Bulger. So I think he was at Alcatraz. He might have been. Was Whitey Bulger at Alcatraz? Can you imagine going your whole life and then someone recognize... How did it even get recognized like that? Yeah, he was there, dude. Look at that. In 1956, he was there. Dude survived Alcatraz in the 50s and couldn't get out of the Santa Monica in, what, the 90s, the 2000s? Thank God. That story's incredible. It's nuts that someone was like, that's fucking Whitey Bulger. Yeah. Yeah.

There it is, Santa Monica. Yes, his address is on there. Where was it? What was his address? I want to know how close I was to Whitey Bulger. Little apartment, too. It's up for rent. 1012. Oh, he's off 3rd Street, man, down by the promenade, man. Living large. So the FBI agent that was part of the task force from Boston flies in, and they wait for him.

in the garage that's how this went down yeah yeah so what they did was they alerted him that there was a problem with like his vehicle or something in the garage so he comes down and it's just fucking a hundred agents so the lead guy might have been the guy right there cuffs him he admits to who he is you know and he goes don't you feel a sense of relief that it's over and he said whitey bulger goes fuck no

Fuck no. You know how he died? Uh-uh. You don't know how he died? Dude, they put a lock in a, like a, you know, master lock keypad in a sock and beat him. Who did? Prisoners. This whole story, the whole story of how he ends up getting killed is so crazy.

Because they never really follow up on how this happened. Like this is the kind of thing that if you're not a conspiracy theorist makes you kind of go, okay, what the fuck is going on? Because he is a high level inmate. Like that you treat people like that a different way. There's a whole different protocol and they move him.

into general population at one point and they're like how did this happen and everyone's like i don't know what do you mean this is like the most he was number one on the fbi most wanted list and then he just gets transferred like he's in protective custody and they transfer him into gen pop and they kill him like on the first fucking day they beat him to death they beat him to death because he's a rat you know yeah they held him down and beat him with a fucking lock

an 80-something-year-old man. That's a fucking brutal way to die. But when they're like, well, why was he transferred like this? And why was he? And they're just like, I don't know. I don't know. You're like, what? That doesn't make any sense. There's all these checks, all these protocols for high-level inmates being transferred. And they're just like, yeah, I don't know how that happened. It was a mistake. It doesn't add up. It was a mistake. Yeah. Yeah.

And then he got killed. He's 89. Damn. Can you imagine living to 89 and being beat to death in prison? Oh, my God. Dude. I mean, the plot started with a phone call to the mother of Sean. The murder of Bolger was planned as soon as the mobster had arrived in West Virginia. The plot started with a phone call to the mother of Sean McKinnon, one of the men accused in the killing the night before the high-profile inmate's arrival.

Yeah, we're getting ready to get another high-profile person here tonight. McKinnon allegedly told his mother the day before the 89-year-old Bulger arrived, a recording of the play. So he was just basically like, I know what's happening tomorrow. As soon as they saw Bulger come into the unit, they planned to kill him.

Yeah, it makes no sense that they would put him in a regular cell. I mean, he's as high profile as you... It'd be like throwing the fucking president in Gen Pop, basically. People like this are always kept in protective custody. It's like they wanted him dead. They did want his ass dead.

Which, I mean, it actually lends to his claim that he wasn't an informant and that he had FBI people as paid informants. Because that's always what he said, right? They were always like, you were a rat. He goes, no, I was paying the FBI. So they were the ones giving me information. And then he's just fucking killed because they threw him in with everybody else. Beat to death. What a horrible way to go. A 90-year-old man, essentially. It's just fucking crazy. 20-year-old fucking...

Yeah, cold-blooded killers. Yeah. And I feel like he's Boston, crime boss, but I feel like the guy that killed him had said something about Massachusetts. I feel like that goes back. There's the guy. Prosecutors won't seek the death penalty either. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Ah, there's a mob like a motherfucker. Yeah, you're okay. Where's this guy from? I feel like I saw he was from Massachusetts or something there. How about that? From Massachusetts. See, that shit goes back. They were waiting on his ass. Man, you got to live a long time to wait to get that motherfucker. He was already serving a life sentence. It must be somebody's grandkid in there. You better take that motherfucker out. The moment he arrives. Yeah, not a lot of remorse in that face. Not at all. Yeah, he's like, huh?

Another life sentence? Yeah, I already have one. Yeah, give me another one. Sure. That guy's a light. He was like made for crime. Criminal his entire life. Whole life. Yeah. Yeah. Whitey Bulger. Look how fucking much Johnny Depp looked like him right there. He did look like him. He really does. Yeah, he did a good job. What was that movie called? Black Mass? Was that what it was called? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He looked just like him there. Just like him. Look at his eyes down here.

Black Mass. I thought that was about Shaq's asshole when the movie came out. But it's about... I guess it's about his heart. Cold-blooded dude. You watch anything good lately? I started watching...

This Edgar Allen Poe show on Netflix, The Fall of the House of Usher. Really? Yeah, I started watching. I like Edgar Allen Poe. I thought they were going to be one-offs, like here's an updated version of The Raven and The Cask of Amontillado, but it's a series, and they're telling a story of what's going on. I'm only about four episodes in right now. It's good? It's good. It's fucking different and good.

Um, but it's the dude's whole family. And it's like, I forget he and his sister when they're little, that's the mom right there. That younger looking lady there when they're kids up a little bit. And then, uh, they bury her in the backyard because they're kids and she dies and they don't know what to do. And then one stormy night they look out and the fucking coffins all dug up. And then the mom's in the house and she's possessed. And now, uh,

Oh, shit. She's basically going after these two and their whole entire family. And that's it, too, right here in the IMDb thing? Yes, it's all part of it. Part of it, yeah. Wow. That sounds cool. It's different. I don't watch much anymore. I don't have time for it. I don't want to sound like one of those people who say, I really am looking for something to watch. I started watching Breaking Bad again, just as a background. Really? Because I feel like it's better than anything else I'm seeing right now anyway. It is pretty amazing. I've only seen it once all the way through, but...

Between legit, I have Stella half the time. I don't ever get to watch TV. When I do, it's just football on Sundays. I make time for that because it's the only time I really have for myself. Then it's on the road if I'm not with Stella. If I'm not on the road, then it's recording three podcasts and doing town spots. I don't know. By the time I get home and I want to watch something, I find myself falling asleep. I'm like, fuck it. I just go to bed. I passed on...

Parties all that weekend. Yeah, I bet. So I was like, no, I'm too tired. Yeah, I'm too tired down here. I'm too tired to stay up late. I stayed out late last night, and that's the latest I've been out in a long time. How late were you out? I don't know. It wasn't even that late. Probably midnight, 1230. Are you here tonight, too? Yeah. You're going out? Yeah. Well, I'm going to go do shows, but I don't go out. That's the other thing. I don't go out. I feel like our jobs...

I can't remember the last time I've been to just a bar. Yeah. I'm not a club guy anyway, but our jobs were out and among people drinking and having a good time. And I feel like I've met the quota of that in your life. Yeah. So when I come home, I just want to get the fuck away from everybody. I don't want to do anything. I just want to be by myself. Yeah. I'm the same way. I just don't have it. I just like, I don't know. I, so I try to take responsibility for sleep.

I try to own, so that I'll go, it just didn't happen. I try to make it like, oh, it's on me to do it. And I just, my whole life, my whole day, everything changes when I get good sleep. Everything. I feel better. I work out better. I make better food choices. I work better as a comic. All of it comes back to sleep. So every time that I'm like,

pushing it, staying out late, or just being up late. I just feel like I pay the price so much. Yeah, and I'm up late doing nothing. I'm not doing anything. I just got a CPAP machine. Did you really? I did. I didn't realize I even had sleep apnea, and then I did a study.

Where did you go? You went to a place? Well, I went to this one. My doctor referred this guy. It was in the same building. And I go to this guy, and he's just trying to sell me a mouth guard that he makes that insurance doesn't cover. I'm like, I'm not interested in your device. I want something that, well, we don't have machines. I'm like, what am I talking to you for? So I went to Santa Monica Sleep Center and did a full study. I did a study with him, too. It was like this ring finger thing, but it wasn't. What's the sleep study like?

um you go home um you do the full study and then they it just records into a machine then you give it to them and then they tell you so i'm a moderate on my side but on my back i'm a severe my i guess i stopped breathing like 59 times in a minute i mean in an hour so every minute i'm fucking not breathing on my back

And they said, my tongue is wide. And when I relax, it just slides in the back of my throat and it blocks it. So whatever. So I started with the one that just up your nostrils, but you got to keep your mouth shut. And I, if, if my nose is clogged, my mouth automatically opens. I'm not,

and she's like well you can use tape i'm like i don't want to tape my mouth shut i use tape sometimes i know you turn me on to it yeah she goes well you should probably use hostage tape and i was like she goes i said hostage i was like that's real she goes yeah you have a beard it's heavy duty and i'm like they call it hot that's what i use could you imagine though they call any other like tape yeah you know it's like i know hostage it is a real fucking it does get your attention but it's good

So I switched to the fighter mask so I could keep my fucking mouth open. And I've been sleeping way better. Is it a notable change? Definitely a notable change. I'm probably two weeks into it right now. And I'm still getting used to getting the seal proper and all this shit. But my scores are all, say, very good, very good. And I definitely have...

Right now, what I do feel is more in the tank throughout the day. Like I don't find myself tired in the middle of the day for a minute and having to rally. I should do a sleep study. You should just do one. Yeah.

Because severe also for a lot of people, the questions are like, are you falling asleep while you're driving and shit? And I'm like, no, I'm not doing that. But on my back during sleep, I'm almost killing myself. That's crazy. So you travel with it now? I didn't bring it this weekend because I just got it and I should have. But I did take it to La Jolla with me the whole weekend when I was headlining down there and used it the whole time. But this time I didn't have time to pack and I was like, fuck it, I'll just old school die. Holy shit, old school die. Yeah, bro, old school.

school guy all right um but i get excited about it now when i want to put it on and go home and sleep yeah like man how much sleep am i gonna get and then i get excited about looking at the app and what kind of score i got and i'm like okay i do feel better yeah and also don't i don't wake up slow and cloudy you know what i mean i wake up clear i wake up i'm up that's the difference trying to get out of this fog i'm up and i'm pretty because if you stop breathing once a minute

For sure, you're not rested. No. Yeah. At all. Dude, I thought I was having dainty little... I keep telling them, like, oh, you grind. I'm like, I thought I was having dainty little sleeps. I thought when I woke up, I was just getting up because I had to go to the bathroom. I didn't realize in my sleep, I'm going... Well, did anyone ever tell you that, like, shared a bed with you? Like, were they ever, like... Not really. Not until recently. Tell you about snoring? I mean, I would get snoring, but I wouldn't get, like, you're not breathing, like, you're, you know, and...

And just recently that happened. Yeah. I was like, what? So I wonder how long that's been going on to, you know, has that been happening since my 20s or. Right. You know what I mean? I don't even know. By the way, I forgot that earlier when you told me about the CMT and you guys got. Did your brothers all have it, too? Oh, yeah, we all have. I'll have it. Everybody's got it. I went and got tested again for the second time when I lived in L.A. and.

in my 40s, I want to say. And the guy's like, look, man, if you're in your 40s at this point with this, you're at the point where you're as far as you're going to get. You're good to go here. So if you can go, go. But I mean, I played soccer my whole life. I played all sports my whole life. And back to PT, the other thing I'm learning how to do is breathe properly. That's wild. Like,

Really breathing from your lungs. And then, like you know from PT, like I'll be in a position where I'm like, just move your shoulder there. And then just a twitch. And you're like, God, I really feel that in that muscle now. Like I'm learning so much of that. So I got my exercises I do every day, and I love it. That's awesome, dude. It's always good to see you, man. Same. Thank you for coming in. Thank you for having me.

Don't forget, check out The Honeydew. Don't forget the new podcast, The Way Back, debuts in January. And check out Ryan's special, Lefty's Son, on YouTube. And we will see you guys next week. Bert and Tom, Tom and Bert. One goes to the top of the swath, the other wears a shirt. Tom tells stories and Bert's the machine. There's not a chance in hell that they'll keep it clean. Here's what we call...

Two bears, one cave.