156: Suffer with Us.. Ft. Shayne Topp from Smosh
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Here we go. Okay. We're rolling. Great. Oh. Are you ready? I guess so. I guess I am ready. You're the first guest I've had on that is familiar with Reddit. At all? Honestly, I've had people come on and they literally sit down and they go, what's your podcast about? And I go, ball, do a little research. Gosh. To not know Reddit though would be a gift. To not know of it. Every day. Every day I wish I didn't know how to read.

That too. That'd probably be nice. For those of you watching and listening today, we are joined by Shane Topp, comedian, actor, fellow Reddit story reader from the Smosh Pit. That's right. Thank you for coming on. Thank you so much for having me. This is cool. I'm so glad I don't have to read

the stories this time. It's a nice break for you, right? Yeah. I love being over here. How did you guys get into reading Reddit stories? Uh, we started doing it on Twitch, uh, back during the, uh, pandemic times. Uh, just reading a bunch from Am I the Asshole? People loved it. And then it took a little bit of a hiatus. We weren't on Twitch anymore. And then our producer, Kiana, uh,

she was like, we should bring that back. We should do it on the YouTube channel. And we did. We did it on a one-off and it blew up. People loved it. And I've been reading tons of Reddit stories ever since. I love it. But before that, I was like, I saw your picture and I was like, why does he look so familiar?

And then I Googled, of course, as we all do. And you were on like iCarly. You're like a little Disney channel star. Yeah, I did some guest stars. Yeah, I've been acting since I was like 14. It's a big deal. Yeah. It's a big deal. Yeah, I started off trying to be an actor, ended up on YouTube reading Reddit stories. I consider it a success. Wow.

Yeah. I mean, I went to OT school. I thought I was going to be helping people learn how to go to the bathroom again after a stroke. Right. And here I am reading Reddit stories. You know what's crazy? Before I joined Smosh, I wasn't working. I was like not booking any auditions.

I was like, okay, I'm going to get my bachelor's in psychology. What do I go and do after that? Yeah. I'm not kidding. OT was one of the things I was considering. Shut up. Yeah. I'm just like, okay, that's a reasonable path. There's job openings. It's a good field. It could be a thing. You're helping people. That's really funny. I feel like this is just, I'm a little shocked right now. Not many people even know what it

is yeah occupational therapy yeah and we're both reading registers maybe we're just like the same person we're probably the same person have you seen Kurzgesagt I always butcher the name but the egg theory yeah like I am you you are me yeah that's what's going on here that's what's happening it's Kurzgesagt yeah Kurzgesagt was right yeah no I've butchered that name before and my fans have called me out for it I don't know how to say it I try I literally try every time to like soak it up as I watch a video and it's just the German it's not sticking no

Okay, well, let's dive in. Great. Okay, this first one is coming from the Too Hot Takes subreddit. It is 16 hours old. Titled, Am I the asshole for wanting my future husband's groomsmen to style his mustache differently for our wedding?

My future husband's groomsmen, along with my bridesmaids, all have no issue fitting a wedding aesthetic. The only problem I have is one of his groomsmen happens to have a more 1920s aesthetic imperial-style mustache with an extra curl.

Think a more dramatic Captain Hook mustache. In my opinion, it tends to be distracting in photos and in person to the point where it's all I focus on. Now, I'm unsure as to if it's just my neurodivergent surfacing, but I need to know if it's an unreasonable request to ask him to change it to something less distracting. My future husband thinks I'm being a bridezilla. Okay. I love this. It's a great start.

Um, anything with a mustache is funny to me just off the bat. Um, I feel like I've heard stories like this, but it always has to do. Typically when I've read stories, it's, it's a bridesmaid with their hair color. Yep. Bingo. Uh, so it's interesting for this to be a mustache. My confusion is how can he change his mustache? Um,

I don't know what you're able to do with that. No. Well, she does include a picture. That is, whoa. That is extreme. It is a very aggressive, like, I'm honestly impressed. I'm curious what product they used. That is a full Salvador Dali going on there. It is very intense. But I think it's one of those things where you wouldn't ask a bridesmaid to change their hair. You can't ask him to do this. Like, this is...

You're just you're being rude at that point. It's part of who he is. Exactly. And if you care about him and you want him to be a groomsman, that's the mustache is part of that. Yeah. I just don't think there's anything he he can do because if it's not curled like that. Yeah. Then it looks crazier. If he's got a full beard where it could just be like combed into the beard, it might work.

I don't know. I've never had a beard. It's hard to manipulate. I've never had a beard of that level or a mustache of that level. It is distracting. I'll be honest, if I was attending that wedding and I saw that, I'd be looking at him the whole time, admiring it.

That's just part of it. And I think they might have to accept that. He could try to brush it into the beard if that's possible. Never heard of that. I don't know. I don't know how beards work. But yeah, I think it's kind of that. It would be a double standard if you asked him to change his appearance before.

because we've already, I think it's been well-determined. You can't ask that of a woman, a woman to do. You can't lose weight. You can't dye your hair. Like you, that's just, you're being an asshole. Your friend was asked to be a part of your wedding for a reason because you love them. You want them standing up there with you to support you on your day. It doesn't mean you can change them. Yeah. And I understand people wanting

people not to take the focus away. At the same time, my perspective is if it were my wedding, I'd want all the bridesmaids and groomsmen to look also super awesome. Yeah. I think that adds to the epicness of the wedding.

That's my perspective. So I don't view it as taking attention away. I view it as just making the wedding even more extravagant. I like that. Did you see the post about a woman who was asked to wear like a blonde wig and colored contacts? And it was every single person in the bridesmaids party. They were like trying to do an Elsa theme, basically. And so I think she

She might have been black or like one of the girls was black at least or something. And so she wanted everyone to wear a blonde braided Elsa wig and like blue colored contacts. I didn't see this, but that is crazy. Yeah. Like, and people were like, you're what? You're changing everything about me. That's crazy. Yeah. The theme is, um, yeah, you have to not be who you are. Yeah. That's wild. Uh, no, I, I,

That's crazy. I think there was a happy update, if I recall, where the bride did get talked to and realized, okay, damn, no, this is starting to look a little weird, kind of giving Aryan race and maybe some other problems. Yeah, yeah. So she did come to her senses at least. Okay, good. I'm glad she had that massive revelation. Yeah. Top comment on this one, just grow one that's more magnificent than his.

Next comment down. It's sad, but I could. I'm a 57 year old woman. There you go. So it's not impossible. No, I think that'd be awesome. Not impossible for people. If the theme was mustaches, then you can, everyone could have mustaches. Yeah. Honestly, this is so weird. And maybe it's like a PCOS thing, but I get like one random chin hair. Really? Like literally, and it's so dark and I, you just kind of feel it. And I do get scared about being able to grow a beard. I think it's impressive. Yeah.

I think if you can, you should at some point. Okay, I'll keep that in mind. Okay, moving along. This next one is four days old coming from Am I the Asshole? Titled, Am I the Asshole for Sending My Daughter to School in Her Pajamas? My seven-year-old daughter, Elsie, has recently started to make mornings more difficult by throwing a fit when we ask her to get dressed for school.

We've tried setting her clothes out the night before, but she still makes an issue out of it. And she doesn't want to sleep in her clothes, so that's not an option either. My wife leaves for work before me, so I'm normally the one who has to deal with the tantrums in the morning. I woke Elsie up, and as always, she refused to get dressed. I wasn't really in the mood to deal with her bullshit, and I didn't have the energy to fight with her about it. So I told her that it was okay, and I'll just take her to school in her pajamas.

She looked pretty shocked because I don't think it was the outcome she was expecting, but the rest of the morning went a lot smoother than normal.

We got in the car and she was more quiet than usual, so I could tell she wasn't really sure what to think of it. But after driving a while, I guess the realization set in and she told me she wanted to go back home and change. I told her she had already made her decision and I wasn't driving her back home now. She started freaking out, saying she wanted me to drive her back home and she didn't want to go to school in her pajamas, but I wasn't turning the car around. So we arrived at school and she eventually went in.

After my wife came home from collecting her from school, she looked pissed. She didn't say anything in front of Elsie, but later in the evening, as expected, she went off on me. She started saying that I had embarrassed her and made us look like bad parents who can't be bothered to dress our daughter. I told her that I'm sure Elsie isn't the first child to go to school in pajamas, and it's not the end of the world.

How old is this daughter? Seven years old. Seven years old. Which is like, what, second grade? Yeah, I don't think... I'm putting myself in the shoes of like a teacher or something. I don't think I would think...

it depends on what these pajamas are. I feel like a lot of pajamas look like regular clothes of just pajama pants and a t-shirt. Yeah. That would look normal. What I am flagging though, is I don't like that he took it into his own hands of like, well, this is how I'm going to parent our child. Yeah. And it's like different. And the way he's talking about his wife is also, it's very light. Yeah.

But there's this thing of like, of course, she went off on me and I think this was right and she disagrees. And I'm like, you're putting this out there for a bunch of people on the internet as opposed to talking to your wife about how you solve this problem.

this dilemma together. Yeah. It just feels like communication could have been had. Absolutely. A little bit. It's definitely giving that like exacerbated undertone. Like it's kind of like scoffing at her, like, you know, she's overreacting again. Do you have stories where the person's not necessarily the asshole for what happened, but they're the asshole for how they wrote the post? Yes. Because that happens every time. Every episode we have, I'm like, I'm

I just don't like you because of the way you're talking about your wife who's not here writing this post. That's not necessarily the case here, but it is still... I think she's justified in being mad at him for doing this and not telling her. Yeah, I think there was a better way to go about this too. One, he could have been receptive to the feedback. I get it. I think this was a good lesson for Elsie to learn. But I hear you. Next time, I'll do something else.

But I think even in the moment, she's seven. She's trying to push boundaries. She's trying to determine her own autonomy, you know, what little a seven-year-old does have. And so as a parent, you could have maybe thought ahead a couple of steps and been like, you know, we're probably going to get to school. She's not going to want the pajamas. Let me grab a pair of pants and a sweatshirt and just bring it in the car in case she does change her mind. Because I think when you get to the point of you're at school and she realized that you called her on her bluff,

she's going to realize that the boundary is there. Like, you know, she kind of learns at that point, like I've, I fucked up. Especially if you do that, she learns that you're playing 4D chess that she can't compete with. It's like, oh my God, do I have an original thought? You're thinking of what I'm thinking of before I think it, it would ruin her in a, in a way that I, as a parent might be good. I don't know. I struggle with a lot of stories that

are about parenting. I don't have a kid. You can say like, well, you should do this. But I'm like, if I had a seven year old who was doing this as well, I'd probably cave in. I feel like I'd turn the car around. Yeah, I would. I probably would, too. I'd hate embarrassing someone. Yeah. And I also remember what it was like being in elementary school. Oh, my God. You're going to be judged.

Kids bully for way less. Oh my God, yeah. It's terrible. Especially nowadays. Kids, now that they have access to the internet, their insults are devastating. I mean, I worked in a kindergarten classroom. I was like a teacher's aide back in 2011 and 2012. And it was a kindergarten classroom. And the bullying that was happening back then...

Like technology wasn't even as prevalent. And now like kindergartners have cell phones. Yeah. It's crazy out there. Yeah. I don't know how people are doing it. I wouldn't be able to survive. No. I will say like, it does sound like he did try a lot of different options though. Like sleeping in the clothes the night before. My brother does that with his kids because they are just, they are terrors in the morning. So funny. Absolute terrors. So there are options like he's tried. So it's kind of like, this is a last resort, but. I agree with what you said though about like,

It's not even, is it even the clothes or is it just her wanting to say no? Because like you don't get to tell me what to do. Yeah. So she's going to find something else to do that with. I know. I want an update on this one, even though it's like, it's so simple. Right. Top comment, not the asshole. Your daughter was testing boundaries and she learned the limit. If you had turned around, she might've done the same thing the next day and started a new pattern. But if you had turned around,

By sticking to your decision in a harmless environment when your daughter was in no danger, she learned a lesson about consequences of her actions. Plenty of kids show up in pajamas, costumes, funky, cool, not funky, smelly clothes all the time. Yeah. I agree with that. Yeah. We do have a comment from a teacher, which I think is great.

As a teacher, I see kids coming to school in pajamas all the time, and it's not even an issue. Kids will come dressed in the most random clothes in elementary school, and that's part of the joy of being that young. Ha ha. Hopefully now Opie's daughter will actually consider what she wants to wear to school before she leaves the house. I definitely agree with that. Yeah. She's not going to stand out. No. I mean, yeah. I feel like I saw a TikTok of a little girl wearing like a...

a bell like or snow white or something dressed to school every day and so they had to have like four variations of it funny like always have one in the wash yeah so it's like kids kids are goofy oh yeah you know she's only seven yeah no I agree with that and I agree on holding those boundaries but I do think they should do it together yeah as parents communicate a little better teamwork makes the dream work

COVID-19 and flu viruses disguise themselves to fool your immune system. That's why COVID-19 and flu vaccines are updated to protect you. Stay up to date on COVID-19 and flu vaccinations. Sponsored by Champions for Vaccine Education, Equity and Progress. Okay, this next one, it's a doozy. Okay. Coming from True Off My Chest, posted a day ago, titled, My brother-in-law is the reason why my husband left me. I don't know what to do now.

All right. Buckling up. Getting into it. We're getting into it. Those are little warmups for us.

I, female 38, met my brother-in-law, 38, at uni. He asked me out in our first year and I refused. He called me the C-word and that I am shallow. My best friend told me that it was a harmless comment from a drunken guy who got rejected. I never thought of myself as shallow. It was his demeanor and awkwardness that was off-putting to me. Anyways, he proved my friend right and other than these comments, I have never felt uncomfortable during my uni years because he never bothered me again."

not even looked my way. Next time I met him was when my baby sister, female 28, introduced him to me as her boyfriend. I didn't even recognize him at first because it was like nine to 10 years since that day he talked to me. He was visibly annoyed that I didn't recognize him and he called me a liar. The family was skeptical at first about him, but he seemed to treat my sister right and she seemed happy. Parentheses, he is very rich.

taking her all over the world, and he seemed kind with her too. They got married after a year of dating. They now have three children. I met my now ex, male 40, five years ago, and the only odd comment from my brother-in-law was that I was still as shallow and superficial as I was in university. At the time, I took it as a joke, but in hindsight, when I found out the truth and started thinking back looking for red flags, this was probably a big one.

He never showed any signs that he disliked my husband, and he was always decent enough with his indifference to have a close friendship with my husband and I. Didn't seem odd because he was always kind of a recluse anyways. A year ago, my husband came home and accused me of cheating, and he had evidence.

The guy contacted him and he had nudes, etc. of me on his phone. The guy told my husband that he didn't know at first that I was married, but as soon as he found out, he contacted my now ex. He even apologized to my husband. I have never met this guy in my life. Nothing I said or did made my husband believe me. He left me and our divorce is pending.

Then yesterday, the guy contacted me. He apologized for what he did and told me that he is friends with my brother-in-law. He sent me conversations, endless conversations my brother-in-law had about me for years. He has never forgotten that I, in his words, quote, didn't even give him a chance and only judged him by his looks.

He called me a c-word in that chat too. Both group chat with his friends but mostly with this guy. They planned this attack and my brother-in-law somehow got access to my photos. The reason this guy contacted me now is that he felt guilty because even when my marriage is over my brother-in-law still was angry and hateful especially when he heard that I was on a date last weekend.

So the friend felt that he didn't help his friend, but ruined innocent people's lives instead. Not sure what to do. My brother-in-law has actually been happier and more sociable than usual since my divorce. And now I know why. Although first I thought he felt sorry and wanted to support me. He jokes about me ending up an old maid with cats as companions. And it doesn't sound like jokes anymore. He means them.

I don't want to ruin my sister's life. She's very happy with her husband. I'm not sure if I should tell my ex or not. I'm very heartbroken that he didn't believe me. I love him very much. He is the love of my life, but I'm not sure if I can forgive him for not believing me. But he is a victim in this too. So maybe he needs to know foreclosure. I'm so terribly sad and hurt. I'm sorry this post has gotten very long. Oh my God. Okay.

A lot of elements to this one. A lot of shitty people in this one. Oh my God. So this guy's a monster, has held on to a rejection from over 10 years or nine years ago. Still holding that level of resentment is psychopathic. That's wild. This friend of the brother-in-law's just went along with this plan

I mean, are they both in on... That's a crime, I believe. Revenge porn? Yeah, they both are within that. I think she should communicate this whole thing to someone because that's a crime. And I mean, in regards to her saying, I don't want to ruin my sister's life, her brother-in-law ruined her sister's life. By doing that, you ruin... When you commit a crime of that level, you're ruining everyone's life around you. Yeah. So...

Yeah, she should absolutely tell. I would definitely press charges for the revenge porn. Yeah. I would be very scared, actually, that he still has access to whatever home cameras or your cell phone, your iCloud. Yeah, where the hell did he get that stuff? Because it's, what the hell? That's terrifying. That's scary. Because that's another thing. Tacky. So I don't know what,

I'm not a lawyer, so I don't know what levels of crimes, how many have been committed here, but I know there's at least a couple. He's stalking her. I mean, at minimum, it kind of feels like that. And there's so much to unpack here because it's like, did he plant cameras in her house? How did he get those photos? But at the same time, stalking.

Did he actually meet the sister organically? Or was he still so pissed at this woman for denying him in college one random drunken night that he then sought out her sister? Yeah. And that's something I don't know if she'll ever get a full answer to. No, he'd never admit that. There's no way. No. And how do you, I think it's safe to assume that. But like, how are you going to find that out?

But I am very curious where these photos came from. She didn't really go into more details of what they were, and that's fair. But that's shocking as hell. And it is sad that the husband...

just immediately was like divorce I'm done yeah it's like you don't want to ask a single more I mean especially if she shows her husband these text messages and everything then he'll know I mean at that stage I don't know what I would do as her because now you know like oh you didn't trust me for a second yeah that's tough

But she absolutely should not just keep this a secret. No, you have to tell him. Yeah. You have to. I think like he was obviously probably really devastated.

But it does kind of highlight maybe a crack in their relationship that he didn't believe her. But then again, at the same time, he's got pictures. He's got screenshots. It's tough. He's got this concrete proof. And how do you turn a blind eye to what's right in front of you? It's tough. Yeah. It's so complicated. I can't just demonize him. But hearing this whole story from her perspective, I can't help but just be like, damn, you got let down by everyone. Yeah.

I don't know. And also like going back, it's too late for this for her. But when her I guess she found out her sister was dating this guy. But I I think what he said to her when she rejected him is worth bringing up.

Like, I just be like, yeah, he was horribly rude and misogynistic to me years ago when I rejected him. That's worth bringing up to your sister. Yeah. Well, and the fact that he's still clearly harboring those feelings. I mean, those group chats were recent. Right. Like he's still... And she didn't know that was going on though until after all this, but I think she absolutely should let her sister know. Absolutely. I think it's hard because like,

My sister is so happy. She's in love, but she also doesn't know who she's married to. Exactly. Like this guy is capable of insane, scary, psychotic behavior. Right. She needs to know. Yeah. And that's your sister. You know, like if it's, if it's a family member, you know, the whole idea of like, well, that's, I don't know. I, I would, I would let my family members know.

If they're if I'm like, you don't know this person, they're lying to you. So I'm going to let you know. I honestly feel like I would sit down and have a family meeting and like share these screenshots and be like, hey, this friend of his reached out to me. We all need to know like this information. Like my life was ruined because of this.

I don't know how you want to proceed forward with your marriage, but like I personally don't want any more contact with him. That's a boundary for me. And like everyone kind of needs to have that like sharing of information because otherwise I could see the parents being like, oh, you know, just forgive. The amount of times that happens in stories is shocking to me. It's exhausting. You have to at this point expect that the parents would be like, well...

we don't know or he's a good guy or he's just hurting. No. Yeah. It's crazy. Damn.

There are a lot of comments from OP, like so, so many. People are definitely talking about suing. Can you and your spouse sue for defamation? I don't know about these things. Not sure if police here care, to be honest. So maybe they don't live in the States or somewhere. Well, that's extremely serial killer behavior, dot, dot, dot. OP responds, so you understand my fear, which the top comment on this one does kind of pick up on the fact that

It wouldn't shock me if this guy found your sister and is dating her just to remain close to you. And OP does respond, I feel so too. It makes it even worse. I hate that there's children involved in this too. Yeah, three. That sucks. I don't think it changes any of the actions she should take. But that sucks. That situation sucks. Yeah. Really bad. That's a monster. And I think unfortunately...

I think the sister stays with him. Like I just, if we're imagining how this plays out, if everything else in their life is perfect, I don't think she's going to let this ruin her life. Yeah. It makes it extra scary how much he can put on a facade that even OP was like, oh yeah, I think things are fine. And then it turns out, no, he was obsessed this whole time to a degree that is...

borderline fiction. That sucks that they're, she should cut her, cut him out of her life. And if that means cutting her sister out of her life, I don't know what you do. This is a situation that doesn't have a good outcome no matter what. No. And you honestly need to for your own safety. Yeah. Oh yeah. This is just not safe or healthy for you anymore. Right. We do have some insight about the nudes and like how OP thinks he got them.

Someone commented, Which I will just say, like,

It's not her responsibility to go through extra steps to hide these photos. That's crazy. Especially nowadays with all the software that I've heard about in Reddit stories. We've had situations where people have found like, oh, our friend was making AI content with us. And it's just like, there's no...

It's not your responsibility. And yeah, there's almost no escape from it for some like until laws are made. It's just unfair. Yeah. But well, an AI is starting to look so believable. I mean, even with like deep fakes that's been happening for for years now and it's it's despicable like ever.

It's going around right now because I think Taylor Swift is like starting to be brought into it and they're talking about legislation, which is amazing. Like it needs to happen, but it's not on the victim's like responsibility, which they're kind of toting that line of like, are they victim blaming with that comment? Yeah. But OP does respond. They're on my iPhone and my husband's.

Which if he had the pictures, how did he not recognize like, oh, she sent these to me? Like, you know what I mean? Like, ah! Right. Yeah, especially then. But OP does comment shortly after and says, oh, God, I just remembered something. My sister has my passcodes. He is an IT guy, but maybe it wasn't that he hacked my accounts or something complicated. Maybe she just gave him the password. That's, yeah. I mean, if it's on their iPhones, it's probably...

and this guy knows IT, it's probably something he accessed. It's still, that's such a breach of privacy and it's still the same level of behavior that I think is so dangerous and wild.

No, it's... Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know what to say. It's nuts. No. And it's still very fresh. I mean, it's only a day old. I think... I just feel... I feel we're going to get an update on this one. So we'll all keep an eye out. There's a lot more comments from OP. So if you want to get into that, I will be sure. Morgan, post link. Post link. Remember. I'll try to post a link, you guys, so you can go read. But I think OP...

has been well supported by friends and family she makes a comment that they believed her at least good and then does say like i'm very hurt and angry that he didn't believe me but let's face it i would have probably done the same thing if he so wait is are they back is the spouse back with her yet or no comment about that yet comment on that i'm hoping it's only a day yeah only a day i hope that i hope that works out because if it's only a day he's upset right now

But if he can, you know, if they can clear up the situation. I think so. I think this is, I think it's salvageable, especially with all the proof. Yeah. Like this guy coming clean. She has all the proof now. And if they were really in love, like I'd be able to forgive. I'd be able to be like, I'm sorry. Like we got to move past this. Like I still love you. So I think there's hope. Right. We'll watch for the update. Fingers crossed. Yeah. I mean, and the spouse sees that proof and then

I don't know what you do if you're the spouse and you found out her brother-in-law did this. I mean. Hopefully nothing that would get charges pressed against you. Exactly, yeah. No, I mean, he could try to kill him. Yeah. I mean that genuinely. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, people have done that on other stories. Yeah. So, yeah, I would go the legal route and get some coin for all of your suffering. Awful. Awful.

Mike Tirico here with some of the 2024 Team USA athletes. What's your message for the team of tomorrow? To young athletes, never forget why you started doing it in the first place. You have to pursue something that you're passionate about. Win, lose, or draw, I'm always going to be the one having a smile on my face.

Finding joy in why you do it keeps you doing it. Be authentic, be you, and have fun. Joy is powering Team USA during the Olympic and Paralympic Games. Comcast is proud to be bringing that inspiration home for the team of tomorrow. Okay, this next one, it does need a bit of a trigger warning. If you are sensitive for animals getting injured, I would recommend skipping this story because

Um, it, it's going to get worse before we get better here. Okay. Okay. Damn. Yeah. So this one is coming from AITAH, 14 hours old. It is titled, am I the asshole for not wanting my boyfriend anywhere near my pets after what his parents told me?

Throw away account because my boyfriend also has Reddit, but he doesn't follow this thread. Just in case, though. I, 24 female, have been dating my boyfriend, 23 male, for two years. We met at an animal shelter when I was looking to adopt my now third dog. Our love for animals is what originally drew us together. We talked for several months before we started dating, and I met his parents pretty soon after we decided to make it official.

We do not live with each other, but we do visit each other quite often. We have talked about it and agreed to give it more time before we take that next step.

That time eventually came when we decided we should take the next step. I went over to talk to his parents while he was at work to discuss it with them. They seemed pretty happy about it, that we were finally talking about being serious. Everything was going well until I mentioned that I live with a few pets and that they would be coming with me. I have about three dogs, two cats, and a turtle. That's where their faces changed.

They asked me if their son knew about them and if I trusted their son to be with them. It was an odd question, but nothing worried me more than the look they gave me after I answered their question. The mom told me that the reason they didn't have any pets was because their son would end up killing them.

He would unalive any animal that he came across when he was in his teenage years. The father told me, quote, he wouldn't have a reason to do it. He would just do it and then throw them away. I was horrified.

I could not wrap my head around it. They continued to tell me about all the pets they used to have. They said that he stopped when he was 17 and that they think he grew out of it. I simply thanked them for letting me know and left. I still love the man, but now I don't know what to feel. I postponed moving in together with the excuse that my lease ends soon and that I wanted to wait until then.

He has asked to come over and I've declined and the times where I have let him in, I've asked a friend to watch over my pets. He has asked about them, stating that he misses them. He has brought food and new toys for them, which makes me feel bad for not wanting him near them. When he does come by to visit and I can't find a babysitter to watch over them, I would keep a close eye on him and I would actively go out of my way to keep my pets away from him.

Ever since his parents told me, I lived with the thought that one day he would unalive them. He hasn't shown any signs of wanting to hurt them. He has been great with them, and my cat even sits on his lap when he is over. But now, I do not want him anywhere near them. Am I the asshole? Okay, before we get into the serious stuff, these parents just being like,

Oh, so you have pets, huh? You know, Greg used to kill all our pets when he was a teenager, you know, but he grew out of it. He grew out of it? Like, what? The parents talking to her about this in such a, like, we don't know what this conversation sounded like in person, but it just sounds so, like... Nonchalant? Nonchalant. And I'm like, what? What is happening? And so they told her all this with the son not in the room present. That's what it sounds like. That's...

What? Okay. And also the parents, the way they're talking about this, I'm like, if my child as a teenager, like, especially, I was like waiting for him to be like when he was three. Yeah. I'm like, okay. Like before he knew what was happening, he was a teenager. Yeah. Full on Jeffrey Dahmer style killing animals. I'm like, dude, I...

Did they put him in therapy? Did they do anything? It just feels like they just accepted it as a thing. And they kept getting new pets and he kept killing them. And they were like, yeah, there goes another one. It's so bad. I'm confused, but this is the most messed up story I've ever heard. But I'm just baffled by the parents and the way they're going about this. But I can say if I was in...

This is tough because I feel like this is, sadly to say, you hear about this with men. And this is obviously one of the clearest signs of a future serial killer. I would not be able to do this. If you're in a place where you're trying to hide your pets from your partner, you can't be with that partner. No, it's done. You're done. I don't even know.

I don't think I would be able to communicate this and address this. And I maybe, and that people could say I'm in the wrong for that. That's fine.

I would have to just go. I'd have to make an excuse and get out. No, I'm in the same exact boat. I don't think you can proceed forward. And like, I mean, you saw me lock the door to the studio and like, I'm a little bit of a paranoid person when it comes to safety, but like him even bringing food over, I'm like, okay, well, is that food already poisoned? Like, is there...

Nefarious intentions by like the toys is like that toy like laced with something like no matter how good of an intention he might have now in the back of my mind and maybe OP's mind, you can't even assume it's a good intention anymore because of this information you learned about.

And the fact that it was up until age 17. Okay. What was it? 17 and 364 days. Was it right before 18? And he just didn't want to be like prosecuted as an adult. And that's why he stopped or he moved out and got sneakier. Yeah. Like he was at an animal shelter. I know. What was he doing there? Wait, that flip up is crazy. That's weird. You don't go from killing animals to then going to the animal shelter. Like,

why was he there? Yeah. No, it's, and especially that's not far removed because he's young still. Yeah. They're in their early twenties. Early twenties. So that's only, you know, they're saying, oh, when he was 17, it's like, no, say, say six years ago, he stopped doing this. And I'm like, that's too recent, too recent. And they've been dating for two. Yeah. So he was only a couple of years removed from this behavior. I,

No, I'm out. I'm out. I'm fully out. Yeah. Unless the parents are just fully lying.

But that would also be scary and weird. And I'd probably be out for that. And even if even if that were that's not his fault, if his parents are just making up a crazy lie, but I'd still be scared and get out of there. Yeah, it's really weird. I'm so confused about the parents and how they didn't put him in therapy. But Opie does have some comments and there's like a little bit additional info about

He has told me that his parents did punish him a lot when he was younger. Quote, I did a lot of dumb shit back then and they would beat my ass for it, is what he would say. As far as I know, he has never gotten into therapy. He has told me that he used to have a few pets, but that they died. I don't quite remember him telling me how they died. He looked so sad that he didn't want to push the subject. He treats my pets well and would ask to see them quite often. Sometimes he would just ask to come over just to play with my dogs.

He has said he started volunteering at animal shelters at 18 and has continued since. He moved out at 19 and doesn't really visit his parents or talk to them often. Dude, that switch up is wild. I'm actually scared. I don't trust it either. Oh, man. That sucks. Yeah. That sucks.

Would you call him out on it or would you just like for your own safety, just like break up? Oh, if I'm in her position, if I'm in her position, especially I'm if I'm going to call him out, I need a group of like 10 men behind me. Like I need I'm like, we have to have a I'm going to have like because I am fully prepared. If this is true, then you are. I don't know what you're capable of and I don't know what your reaction is going to be. Yeah, I would not fault her for just getting out of there and not.

Yeah. You have to. You just, oh, a lot of, those are a lot of the comments too. OP run now. Oh my God. Yeah. Like you have to, like, I'm going to put another spin on this. What if his parents have narcissistic tendencies and they made the story up to keep their son at home? That's, that's what I said. Like, but even if that, even if that's the case, I'd still be tripped up and I'd be like, I gotta get out of here. You know? Cause if that's the case, I feel bad for the son.

But I don't know. I don't know. That to me is a pretty wild assumption. I'm not saying it can't be true. Yeah. But weird. Yeah. Well, OP does comment back. He moved out at 19. He hasn't stayed with them in years. So I don't know. Like, it doesn't seem like they have good reason for that to be a case. Yeah. And then like that doesn't really make sense. It's not really believable to me.

Anything's possible. Yeah. But it's not, that's not what my mind is jumping to. And there are a lot of parents out there who would tell people stuff like that, but they would also downplay behaviors like that. It's like, yeah, you know, I used to do this stuff. But the fact that they're warning her is strange. It's just, it sounds like the beginning to a horror film. I would agree. As of 11 hours ago, OP has not confronted him yet.

So we'll see how this plays out. But top comment, not the asshole. What the actual fuck? You're not overreacting here. If his own parents are telling you he used to harm animals, that's a huge red flag. I get it. He's been good around your pets so far. But can you really risk it? And what was he doing in the animal shelter? Getting new victims? Nuh-uh. No way. It's a blessing that his parents told you about his past. So he works at animal shelters, but he doesn't have a pet of his own. I don't like that.

Yeah, Opie did comment on it. And essentially he was just going to give back and help out because he loves animals so much. So it was a win-win for him. It's fishy. Yeah. It's fishy for sure. No, it sounds like the Antichrist. It's a little convenient. Yeah. Damn. Oh, God. Yeah. That's rough. That is rough. That's really rough. That's recent too. Yeah. Man. Yeah.

You really find the devastating ones. I know. Well, okay. So I felt... I didn't even introduce our theme today. Our theme is the worst stories you've ever heard. I know. Traumatizing Shane. That's the theme today. It was kind of like a mix of like...

what the hell is going on? Yeah. Like, what do you mean? Like, what do you mean here? And like, well, I had to read it. So now you have to share in the suffering with me. Right. So it's kind of that, but we're going to get a little lighter on the next one. No, it's okay. I can handle it. It's going to get

better. I can handle it. For a second. I just am a little shocked. I know. No, last thing I'll say on that one, I'm curious your opinion. I've said it a lot, which is under the age of 25, if someone's in a relationship where they're

especially something of this level, but even much more minor than that. If you're under the age of 25 and you're not happy in the relationship you're in, I'm like, just get out of it. Just go. You're young. Experience other relationships. That's my mindset.

You know, like I'm the same. You don't have kids if you're not married. It's like I mean, even if you are married, but especially when you're 23. Yeah. And especially like, frankly, like women dating like men who are under 25. I'm like, he doesn't know who he is yet. So you don't know who you're really dating. So if you're not happy, especially if they show any sort of dangerous behaviors, get out. Yeah, this is this is just this is not worth it.

I would be done, but I completely agree. I think a lot of people put so much unnecessary pressure on themselves to have these mile markers. I found my person at 25. We're engaged two years later. Married by 27. Kids by 30. Don't do that to yourself. No. Don't put that pressure on yourself. Everyone goes at their own pace. And you take this as a lesson learned. You dodge the biggest bullet. Oh, my God. Like, you...

are going to be so much better off for this. And you'll have peace of mind going forward. Because if you stayed with this person, you would constantly be sleeping with one eye open, looking over your shoulder, and that's no way to live. Yeah. And if the parents are to be believed, and that's a true story, there's a very good chance that she will wake up and hear a story about him killing someone. Yeah. Like, just honestly. Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, this is like they talk about animals like hurting animals is like the gateway to serial killing. Like it's you don't hurt innocent things if your screws are all tight in your head. Like there's something here. Right.

What's the worst? What's the worst one? Was it this one today? Or what is like the most standout? Violence towards animals is always super jarring. I'm sorry, everyone. No, no. I'm here. Like I can withstand listening to the stories and talking about them. You can hang. You can handle it. It's just I just mean like

When I read about a person, I'm like on my scale of how bad of a person are you? Oh, yeah. This is up there. And it gets beyond like, you're an asshole. It's like, oh, you're a horrible, horrible monster. Yeah. But I hope the parents are lying.

I hope so. Fingers crossed. I mean, there's always a chance. Always a chance. Did you read The Coconut Story? The Coconut Story? Oh my God, Shane. Man, you are really, you're making me feel like an amateur over here. You've read Poop Knife, right? Of course I've read Poop Knife. Okay. Of course I've read Poop Knife. Everyone that's listening is like screaming at me, don't read The Coconut Story again. The Coconut Story. Yeah. Maybe I have heard, I don't think I've read The Coconut Story. You definitely

Definitely remember it. Is it an old one or is it newer? It's in the Reddit Hall of Fame. Interesting. Yeah. Huh. I'll let you ponder that one. Okay. Okay. All right. I know what I'm doing right after this. Everyone's like screaming, no. It can't be that bad. It involves maggots, so. Oh. It might be that bad. Okay. But it's not called the maggot story. It's called the coconut story. Good. Okay.

Okay, moving along, lightening things up a little bit here for a second. This is coming from our Too Hot Takes subreddit posted a day ago titled, My 60 male son-in-law, 28 male, has the opportunity to become a NASA astronaut, but my daughter, 27 female, is holding him back.

In 2012, my family and my now son-in-law, 17 male, now 28 male, were sitting outside of Dulles International Airport to see the Discovery Space Shuttle fly in. It flew right over us and was one of the coolest experiences I had ever seen. And for everyone else, it was just that. But for my son-in-law, it was clearly something far more than just a cool experience. Fast forward almost 12 years later, and my son-in-law is now a test pilot in the Air Force.

He has flown various aircrafts, including the F-16, F-22, and other aircrafts that I don't even know about. He's very young for his position, but he has been very dedicated towards his end goal of being a NASA astronaut. Despite lacking some of the various requirements, his superiors have recommended him to NASA with a lot of positive feedback. He's so close to achieving his dream, with the only problem being my daughter.

She is terrified he'll somehow die in either a training accident, flight, or some other obscure way. She has apparently thrown many tantrums over it, throwing things, hitting him, and threatening to leave him and take my grandson away. She is refusing therapy, and my son-in-law has said he is considering to cease further attempts to make it into the astronaut program if it means he stays married.

I can't stress how rare of an opportunity this is, not just for him, but anyone. And as for someone whose witness his passion manifest, I want him to go for it. And I don't want my daughter to stop him. But I also don't want their marriage to fall apart because of it and have my grandson shared between them.

My daughter has acted this way before when he has taken his career in a different way as expected, but I don't want to advise my son-in-law to continue with his career on a possible bluff just for it to turn out to be real this time. He wants advice, and now I need it. Okay.

Don't be mad at me. Okay. But I knew I was coming on this show today, so I did check out your subreddit. Did you see this one? And I saw this one. Good. Okay. You're prepared. So I'm prepared. Okay. This one's funny for me because my dad and my grandfather were both in the Air Force. Okay. So my dad flew F-16s. What's funny... Flex on us. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. I don't know how to fly at all, but they did. Okay.

This is funny to me because I'm pretty sure...

I mean, he's a test pilot already. Yeah. What safety is going to be different here? I actually am pretty sure like astronauts aren't going to space every day. No. But test pilots are probably flying far more often. Yeah. It's also one of those kind of things where you know how you're so much safer in an airplane than you are in your car driving to work or home every day. I know. You don't realize that. You're more likely to get hit by a fallen coconut than attacked by a shark. Okay.

Like stuff like that. Yeah, I'm pretty sure. Oh my God. No, I totally- But you get the idea. There's weird shit out there. Yeah. But I don't understand. She must be thinking of like movies and all the like things we've talked about in movies, but I'm pretty sure astronauts actually are overall, it's not too dangerous, but there's also a chance I think you could be an astronaut and not even go to space. Yes. There's so many parts to the job. There's so many. I-

So my fiance is like, oh my God, he's so obsessed with space. He's going to like, I thought you were about to be like, he's, he's an astronaut. No, he wants to be. He's such an astronaut and I hate him. Oh no, he wants to be, but there's, there's, um, there's like this point where he almost went into the air force because he wanted to be the first one to go to Mars. And so knowing what I know and this guy's age, he probably is in the running to be one of the,

like if he's going into this program now, he would be working towards the Mars missions.

I guess I'm, I'm a, that would be so cool. So cool. I want to believe, this is a separate conversation. You want to believe this is real? I want to believe, I want to believe like I will see people go to Mars. Yeah. Like I, I never want to go. I have no desire. No, no. Keep me down here. But I would love being like here on earth knowing like there are people there. That's so cool. I want to terraform the fuck out of Mars. Let's do it. Let's go. You know, let's get some Starbucks there. But, but I, I don't,

I'm a skeptic of if it's going to happen soon. Like, I don't think this guy would be able to get in the running for it. It's interesting because they're trying to do... They're planning missions right now to create the moon base. So sick. The moon is going to be like the hub for the Mars missions. And so I think they're predicting... That's so sick, dude. I feel like I've heard four years. I'm very much like...

As far as Earth is concerned, I want less like human stuff. Yeah. Less technology. I want more forests and everything. But when we talk about the moon, I'm like, turn that into a whole base. I would just cover that. Would you go to the moon at least?

I said this in our podcast of like, I'd go to space if I could go for just a little bit. Yeah. I don't want to go too long, but I feel like it's a huge commitment. If you go to the moon, you're going to have to be there for a while, you know? Yeah. I don't care about necessarily. Do you think we have actually been to the moon?

Oh, yeah. Okay. Yeah. Just seeing where you're at on that. No, I established on your podcast that I don't believe the moon is real, that the Earth is flat, but also hollow. No. Yeah, we've been there. Okay. Buzz Aldrin's out here punching people who's saying he wasn't. I think he was there. He was there. He was there. Okay. Yeah, apparently SpaceX is going to Mars in 2024. What?

We're going to Mars. This year. All right. I hope I am proven wrong. But let's see when manned missions will start. Yeah. As early as the 2030s.

Okay. So wait, SpaceX is sending like another drone there or something? Yeah, they're trying to like send, I think, supplies. Cool. More soil samples, all of this stuff. I don't know. Like, again, it's kind of like to your point though, like test pilot stuff is maybe more risky than these space missions that are so intensely prepped for because, I mean, after the...

the Challenger accident where like the teacher and civilians were killed. I don't think NASA, because of funding, they can't afford bad accidents and bad PR. Like they have to have their shit locked down. And I just started watching the show on Apple with Austin Butler. Masters of the air. So good. Yeah. So good. But I started watching it. I'm like, the storyline sounds familiar. And being from Duluth, Minnesota, I'm,

We have this like World War II museum dedicated to this pilot named Richard Bong. Got a bridge named after him. Big deal. He is like the record holder for like the most kills in combat. So he had like 40. He's like an ace or whatever that means. Yeah. And he ended up dying in

As a test pilot. So it wasn't even during World War II. He died during an accident for like testing a new Lockheed like plane here in Burbank. So it's like he made it out of the war. World War II, arguably like the pyro like guerrilla warfare of the sky times only to die in Burbank, California testing a plane. Yeah. Like so it's like test pilot. Yeah.

Right. No. Yeah. That's that sucks. Yeah. But yeah, I guess also with going back the thing with Mars, once people are going there, I think that's a lifetime commitment. I don't I think you come back. I've from from the random articles on the Internet I've read. I thought if we if someone gets on a spaceship to Mars and.

the ability to come back from Mars is not there. Like those, those first people going there are going there and they have to stay there. Those colonizers. I know. Yeah. Fuck them. That, okay. Well, that's a different, different thing.

Yeah, I'd be upset. But I feel like that's not her concern. Yeah, you can address that down the road. Yeah. Maybe he'd already be retired by 2030 if he's 28. You know, they retire young. I don't know. This is a stupid joke, but is his son, the pilot, is he Big Bird? You're gonna have to explain that one to me. Big Bird was almost on that, on the Challenger, I believe.

Oh, my God. Sesame Street, Big Bird, right? This is some smosh inside joke lore. Oh, my God. Okay, but actually, I'm really gullible. I'm actually fairly certain. We have research that is being done. My team is on this right now. On the history.

It's on the History Channel. Okay, so it's real. It is real. Holy smokes. Yeah, Big Bird. Oh my God. We had a guest, Elise. Wow. Elise from, she has this joke on our Try Not to Laugh series forever ago where she's like, this is an alternate universe where Big Bird was on the Challenger. It's an insane joke. I never have said, let me just clear this up. I have never made a Challenger joke, but.

Just for the record, guys. Ian Hecox of Smosh has made several across our channel. What would they have done? Like, would they have been like...

He was able to fly out because he was a bird. What would they have done to keep Big Bird's character going for the plot on Sesame Street? Have you seen that other Apple show? What's the one? The morning show? The space one. For All Mankind? For All Mankind. It's on my list. It's an alternate reality. If Russia made it to the moon first. If Russia went to the moon first, but what if one of the seasons of For All Mankind was they took that premise? Big Bird. What if Big Bird was on the Challenger and then they go through how the Earth would be different?

Wow. Culture could be changed. We managed to take a story that wasn't too dark and we made it dark. We made it. We still found a way. We made it awful. We still found a way. Yeah, I feel like he's got to go for it. I feel like no matter what choice he makes here, it's kind of a catch-22. Yeah, it sucks. It sucks that he's being put in that position. I hope...

I hope it's a bluff, but that's not a great bluff that she's apparently already pulled before. Yeah. And it's not one you really want to like find out. Yeah.

And I get it. Anxiety. Sure. Like my fiance wants to go to the moon. Like he is like his goal is to go to space someday. And if he doesn't make it there while he's alive, he wants his body to be shot out into space. Okay. That's I mean, that's reasonable. It's better. Just canoned right at it. Apparently it's a thing. Yeah. You can buy it. Yeah. So but then I told him, I'm like, what if some alien found your body and brought you back?

That'd be so funny. Like that's, you could be a test, a guinea pig in some alien lab. Oh my God. Yeah. You find out 500 years from now, an alien brought you back and buried you in like Ohio. Oh God. And you're just like, that's, that's your legacy. Ohio. Sorry, Ohio guys. People from Ohio listening. Just like, whoa. Yeah. What did I do? I guess what's worse than Ohio is Wisconsin. Yeah. It could be Wisconsin. Yeah. It could be Wisconsin. Yeah.

Bakersfield, California. What is up there? I don't know. Or down there. I don't even know where it is. It's so... It's somewhere. Irrelevant. Yeah. Damn. We just pissed off several states and cities. It's all in good fun. You guys know I'm kidding. But...

Top comment, he's a test pilot already. That's like one of the most dangerous jobs on the planet. How is going into space any more dangerous than that? Someone else goes, this is also what I was thinking. NASA pilot actually sounds like a safer job option. Yeah. They can't lose those guys. No, they can't afford to. They invest so much into them and their training. Right. Yeah, people are like...

Considering that the test pilots continue flying while the majority of astronauts do not end up actually undertaking space missions, this is certainly more true in a statistical sense. And then somehow Secret Service got brought into it and someone goes, I would leave my husband if they were a Secret Service agent. Fuck that. Seriously, Secret Service is safer than being a garbage man.

It's the mundane things that people don't realize are the most dangerous. Garbage trucks do freak me out. I get really scared driving by them. They're a monster. Crazy. Can you imagine getting stuck in one? Oh, God. I've thought about that. Oh, and then you see the videos of the little raccoons stuck in them. The garbage cans. I haven't seen those videos. You haven't? Oh, my God. I ended up on the raccoon side of TikTok for a while and foxes. I don't know how. And these people go around checking big garbage boxes.

Oh, is that the one where the raccoon, they open the door and the raccoon's holding both sides of the door? Yeah, they're trying to get out. Yeah. Oh, I love them. They're just so cute. So sweet. I've always wanted a raccoon.

I think there's a Reddit story that we read about a raccoon that went to a wedding. I read that one too. Yeah. Pebble. Pebble. Pebble was the best. Yeah. We classify some people and animals as legends. You know, they're not assholes. They're legends. And Pebble's a legend. Yeah. For sure. That was a great way to put it. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Moving along.

This next one is coming from Am I the Asshole? Three days old. Titled, Am I the Asshole? Forgiving my sister-in-law three days notice that I would no longer be making a cake for her daughter's third birthday after finding out she and her parents told others about my history.

I, 28 female, love to bake and will often make cakes and stuff for friends. And since I met my in-laws in 2018, I'll do it for them as well. My sister-in-law asked me to bake her daughter's cake for her birthday, and her birthday is this weekend. She asked me back in October, and we discussed what she wanted in detail. It's not my first time making her cakes, but it is my first time as her sister-in-law officially and where I felt like I was truly a part of the family.

Three days ago, I was out grocery shopping and I ran into a family friend of my in-laws. This person is not someone I like very much. She's a bad gossip and seems to have some malice in her while sharing gossip about others.

I try to be polite to everyone, and I normally don't talk to her. But she stopped me and went out of her way to ask me when my husband and I are having kids. Then she mentioned me being a foster child and an affair baby, and she did it in a way that was meant to come across as concern, but was really her being intrusive and cruel. She mentioned that my in-laws and sister-in-law were concerned about our kids not having anyone.

I told my husband when he got home from work and I was a mess. It might seem dumb, but I felt like his family betrayed the trust I put in them and they did the one thing they were asked not to do, which was tell people about my history. It's not something I want to broadcast to everyone who knows me. My husband confronted his parents and sister and they said they only mentioned it to, quote, a few close circle of people.

And they defended it when my husband said that wasn't okay. Sister-in-law said it's not like people wouldn't find out eventually. And he asked her how they would find out if they never told them.

My history is that both my parents were married to others and had children with their other spouses when they had an affair. I was the result. Both sets of first children were technically adults or close to it when I was born. The day before my fifth birthday, we were in a car crash together. My parents died and so did the people in the other car. I was the only survivor and

and I was in the hospital for a few weeks after. Nobody in either of my parents' families wanted me and I was brought up in foster care the rest of my life. I never found a family. After hearing sister-in-law say what she did and realize how unapologetic they were and hearing how little they cared about what they did to me, I asked if I could speak to sister-in-law for a second and told her not to expect a cake from me after going against what I wanted and having such little care for the harm it caused.

She went crazy and said it was only three days until the birthday party, and my husband backed me up and said, so what? She and their parents were blowing up his phone so bad he had to block them. And I worry that I'm being a bit of an asshole saying no with such short notice. Am I the asshole?

Well, my take is no. No. Not at all. No. It's a third birthday party. Like, yeah, you have three days. They're three years old. They don't give a crap. Go to the grocery store. Literally throw whatever at a three-year-old. They'll eat it. They don't care. If it's delicious, if it's sugary...

Three-year-old me, I don't remember what cakes looked like when I was three. No. I was eating anything. I think I had the Barbie cake like every year from the time I was like... Oh, where it was the dress? That is the coolest cake. I remember going to a birthday party and seeing that. Okay, that I would remember. That was a cool cake. I do remember. It wasn't even my birthday. I kind of want that. I think I want it again this year. That's pretty cool. Yeah, it's iconic. But...

still three days is plenty of notice. Yes. Uh, so the, obviously that's unimportant to the story, but, uh, it helps. It helps. Sure. Uh, to be that upset. Yeah. Even day like, yeah, you, you messed up like the, you broke this person's trust. They're not going to do you favors now when you break their trust, but especially that's, it's not a big deal to me to be blowing up their phone to that level. Yeah. Uh, they're selfish. They're selfish people. Um,

And they feel guilty, maybe. Or maybe. I don't know. I don't know if they're just kind of getting defensive and gaslighting or if they truly don't care. That's so crazy. I just, I don't know. That sucks. It really does. And I feel bad for OP because it definitely is like the most traumatic childhood by the sound of it.

But what's really sad is, like, OP has taken on that story of how she came into the world and, you know, this accident tragedy as, like, that's my burden to bear. Right, yeah. And then these people are weaponizing it against her and saying, well, we're scared for any future children you guys could have because, you know, you don't have any family. Okay, well, one, we have you guys, right?

So what are you calling yourself? Chopped liver? But also...

People lose their parents all the time. Like, just because I had this as my start doesn't make me any less of a person. Right. Like, what? They're operating on some, like, royal court types of mindsets of, like, well, your family lineage, unfortunately, is not good. It's... They're just being weird about this where I'm like, I kind of don't care whose people... I don't... When I meet people in any sort of capacity, I don't think about...

their parents or their families. I'm like, you're an individual. I respect you as an individual. That's so strange to say. There's so many people I know too. I mean, this is sad to say, but it's like,

A lot of people don't have parents, even if their parents are alive. And so it's, you know, a lot of people have unreliable families. I feel like that's almost more common than not. I would agree. Yeah. And so it's just what a strange thing to hold over someone. That's not her identity. It shouldn't be something she has to worry about how people are going to view her.

at all. No. That sucks. It's really sad. Because growing up without family is already hard enough, but to be judged for... That's something I didn't even know people judged people for. Yeah. That's shocking. Yeah. That's some... That is some...

Old school. It's honestly more surprising and common than you would think. Like, my mom, I have, like, two siblings from my mom. Older brother, younger brother. We all have different dads. And growing up, people would literally judge us for it. And, like, I literally got called a bastard in elementary school. What? Literally. Literally, like, medieval times. Like you're from Game of Thrones. Medieval times. Yeah, it was so...

You're nothing but a bastard. Literally. Like, what the hell? And like, it was like really, like I would go over to like kids' house and like I remember this in third grade and like their parents would ask me like, oh, like are your parents home? Like, are your parents together? No, my parents aren't together. Oh.

Oh, okay. What? I remember it like it was yesterday because it was like at that age, it was so traumatic. That's wild. Yeah, people are really judgy and like a baby born out of wedlock. Like I think people in the South are still kind of goofy about that. I guess, yeah. Throughout the United States, there's different pockets where it's going to be viewed very differently. Yeah, it's goofy. That's one of those. There's a lot of areas where I'm like, okay, I understand my experience differently

being in LA for so long is different than certain places because that's not something I feel like you get judged for here. No. At all. Because in fact, I feel like most people I know, I feel like the wild thing is when someone's like, my parents are still together. You're like, what? Whoa. Whoa. Yeah. Crazy. I know. It is wild.

Top comment on this one. Not the asshole. They treated you like family to your face, were willing to have you bake cakes for them, but they couldn't not share your personal backstory to others after being told explicitly not to. Huge violation of trust, and I'm very happy to hear that your husband is backing you up and setting a boundary with his family. I'm also very sorry to hear you're going through this. It must be heartbreaking.

Which, how refreshing is that? The husband. The husband. That's so great. You start to prepare yourself for it never to happen when you read these a lot. Yeah. Because what is it? Nine times out of ten, they don't. Oh, my God. They side with the in-laws and say, you're overreacting. The husband never backs them up. I feel like parents rarely back them up. The amount of times siblings. Siblings, I'd say, are the most likely. They're 50-50. Maybe 75-25. But that's probably the best percentage out of all of them, right? I would agree.

So sad. It is. OP does respond. It is. I feel a little like another family has just proven they do not care about me at all. And after going through that my whole childhood, it's not easy to face again. Poor thing, man. I know. At least she has a great husband. Yeah. And that's what the next comment down says. Family is what you make it. Your husband is a rock star and he has just proven how much he cares about you.

Which that is good. Yeah. And if you're going to have one of those people let you down, she got the better of the two. Because if your husband lets you down, it's just like, damn. Yeah. There's a couple other comments from Opie.

And apparently they're trying to like people are asking like more specifics of like who they told. And OP says all of them shared with a small group of friends, which would add up to like 10 people. They sometimes have these dinner parties. My husband never liked them, so we never went. But during one of those, they told them, which is like I can't even imagine.

sharing that like how did that come up how did you find context to even make that relevant that's so much to tell to yeah it's not like just like a small piece of information you can accidentally slip up and say it's like it's a whole story yeah

Well, and like, I think it's like someone here comments the way the gossipy friend said it sounds like they think of it as some sort of bit of gossip themselves. Quote, you know, she's a foster kid. Like they knew something they couldn't wait to share. They don't care. And OP goes, it was the affair baby part for me too. Had that thrown at me a lot as a child. So crazy.

That's nuts. Yeah. People have affairs all the time. It's just like, does it suck? Yes. Is cheating wrong? Yes. Is it the child's fault? No. Like... Right. I'm a little baffled by this one. I am baffled too. This sounds... Like I said, this sounds like it's from some sort of fictional fantasy world that I'm reading. Yeah. Well, and someone does even ask too, like, what the heck does that have to do with you having your own kids? I don't understand at all.

I don't understand where any of that's coming from. No. And OP responds, the implication was my kids will carry the burden of being the child of an affair baby, that they won't know one whole side of their family, and therefore it would make life awful for them. And I will bring kids into the world who will be hated as much as I was slash am for simply being born for being me. As we talked about earlier, I do think like,

Gen alpha kids can bully on a level that we probably couldn't ever comprehend. Yeah. But I don't think they're going to give a shit about this. No. I don't think this is in their criteria. No. There's so many other things that they'll be able to make fun of her kids for. Yeah. Like kids are getting made fun of for all sorts of stuff nowadays. I agree. How much you suck at Fortnite or something. I don't know. I probably aged myself 15 years by saying that. But...

I just think there's a lot of stuff on the tier list of what kids are going to go for before they care about your lineage. Yeah, I mean, there's people out there like Robert De Niro still having kids. Scorsese's having kids. And his daughter, I think there's what, like 60 years between him and the daughter he's making TikToks with. And she is very beloved on social media. So like embrace it. It's just a part of your story. Yeah, I don't think, no.

She's fine. Yeah. She and her husband are fine. Yeah. I like how he was so supportive. Honestly, good. And good. Like these friends were not friends. No. You found the true colors of that group. And now you know. Now you can avoid it. That's often my thought with those types of stories. Like you didn't lose a friend. You found out they weren't your friend. Exactly. Okay. Moving along. Would you ever let someone use your home for a home birth?

Oh, wow. You know? Maybe you have a pool in your backyard and they wanted a pool berth? You know, I don't have a pool. Do you have a bathtub? My bathtub's not great. I think I would... I think my reaction would be similar to this. I'd be like, oh, yeah. Oh, gosh. You know, I think they're doing...

I think I'm having some maintenance done and I can't remember exactly. When's your home birth going to be? There's asbestos in my walls. Yeah. There's some lead paint. Oh, gosh. I, you know. Neighbor cooks meth. It's just not. Yeah. You know, my neighbor, he's Heisenberg. My husband, he's

He wants to be an astronaut. I'm trying to make that not happen, but he also murders our pets. There's a lot going on right now. Yeah, you don't want to get involved. Yeah, so I'd say no, not right now. Yeah. So this is coming from AITAH one day ago. Am I the asshole for not letting my sister use my house for her home birth?

My younger sister is currently four months pregnant and has always been scared of hospitals. I knew this wouldn't be easy for her, but she's decided to forego the hospital altogether and wants a home birth. The only issue is she and her significant other live in a thin-walled apartment, so for obvious reasons, she can't do it there without someone thinking something's wrong.

Here's where the issue comes up. I have a house, a shitty small one bedroom, but a house. She wants to have the baby there so she can have a home birth somewhere familiar and safe. There's a few issues I have with that. For one, I have a one bedroom, so she'd either be giving birth in my bed or on my couch, neither of which I look forward to cleaning up, not to mention there's the risk of something going wrong and not to sound insensitive, but I don't want to be found liable for anything.

I called to explain all of that to her, and she guilt-tripped me, calling me a bad sister, saying I was being selfish. I reminded her that she should probably just go to the hospital like a normal person, or if she didn't like the idea of that, she was welcome to call off the pregnancy since there's still time. Okay. Now she's been shaming me to everyone in the family, and I have relatives on my back saying I should just let her have the baby here.

That took a turn. That one comment. I was not expecting. There we go. There we go with what I said of like, you're not the asshole. Okay, you're an asshole for saying that. Like, that was weird. Yeah. That's a wild one to say. That's strange.

Also, four months. Four months, yeah. That's a little far. You just get rid of that. What the fuck? That's crazy. She's not... But going back, she's not the asshole for saying no. No, it's her house. One bedroom house. I've never heard of that. Yeah. Huh. It's a small setup. That sounds cool. Maybe 800 square feet. That's tight quarters. In LA, that's probably like... Still a million. Two million dollars. Yeah. Yeah.

No, that's completely fair. It's your home. And, you know, that's that's fair for her to want to do that. Yeah. You know, that's that's within your own parameters of how you get it done.

I don't know anything about the science or medical stuff behind births or home births. So I can't speak to the safety or all of the ramifications and things. That's probably why I would also say no is because I'm just like, I am so uneducated on this. Yeah. I don't feel comfortable saying,

having it in my space. I would be the same way. I would assume it is dangerous. Maybe I'm wrong. I don't know. I mean, it depends. Is it truly an unassisted home birth? She's just showing up, no team, no doula, no midwife. That's true. There's a bunch of other people that could be involved in this. If you have a well-educated

or midwife, they would be able to recognize signs of distress and then hopefully be able to call like an ambulance. And then you go to the hospital. And then you go to a hospital. But like maybe she's doing this because of costs and it's cheaper, but there are places where you can give birth that don't resemble a hospital. Right. Because she said she's scared of hospitals. Yeah. Which understandable. Like they're scary sometimes. Totally. Oh, for sure. You know, pass with them. Yeah. Yeah.

But to just show up at your sister's place. To pressure your sister and to make her feel guilty for that. It's just... Yeah. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. These types of stories sometimes are hard for me to relate to because I'm a person who operates on the mindset of like, I can't assume someone's going to do something for me or allow me to just have it just at their place like...

I, I'm, if I like want to do something to that extent, I'm like, okay, how do I do this myself? Um, or with your partner, your problem solver, you'd take it upon yourself versus assume other people. Expecting someone else is going to just solve it for me. Um,

Yeah. I assume there's probably still ways for her to have a home birth somewhere. I would think so. But... Which the top comment does pick up on. There are birthing centers that exist specifically for what she wants. She doesn't need to take over your house, and a center would have connections to the hospital in case it became medically necessary. Yeah. Somehow, I think sister is thinking of ways to give birth for free. That's the next comment. Which... Yeah. Hey. Hey.

It's expensive. No, it's some bullshit. It's crazy. Do you know that if you get a C-section, they charge you for taking the baby and putting the baby on your chest? Yeah, I believe it. They do crazy stuff. They charge you for Band-Aids. It's that whole trend of ask for the itemized receipt. Oh, yeah. And then they suddenly cut a bunch of stuff off because they start to realize how much it looks stupid. Yep, Band-Aid, $500. Yeah. No, it's all a giant scam. Yeah. Oh, God.

God, as someone that was in healthcare, it is by far one of the most frustrating systems. Oh, so annoying. Yeah. So annoying. Yeah, this is interesting. I think she needs to look into alternative methods. I'm really fascinated by home births and like pool births. I actually am very curious about dolphin-assisted births. Sorry, what? Yeah, you can give birth- Dolphin-assisted birth. Yeah, you can give birth with a dolphin.

Yeah. Okay. Yep. Dolphins love pregnant women because they can hear the baby in there. Okay. Yeah. How does the dolphin assist? So there's something about the dolphin's sonar that apparently women report decreased pain. They're getting into it. I don't know how clinical they've gotten, but it is a thing.

Let me see if I can find a picture for you. Look, I don't know what I would even try to argue. I'm so baffled. Yeah. Some people are very, very opposed to it. They think it's a bad idea, probably based off of the one dolphin study that NASA did. But...

Did you hear about that one? No. Oh, yeah. I'm getting so much thrown at me in a row. We're on dolphin births right now. And now we're moving on to dolphins in space. Well, this is so dolphins are extremely smart. Like they have such a crazy brain and like their white matter and all this stuff is just like way more advanced than ours. So they thought we could teach dolphins how to talk.

Or at least communicate with us in cohesive ways. Sure, sure. So there was this one study that NASA did, and they had a couple dolphin trainers work with these dolphins to get them to communicate. And one of the ladies ended up satisfying the dolphin. Okay. So it just, it took a turn. Wait, where was the communication? Like they were talking though? Yeah.

I still don't... Maybe I shouldn't ask any more questions. So they were using devices to facilitate...

Conversation. Conversation. Yeah. Like they strapped a little readers up to the dolphin's head to read brainwaves and all this stuff. But the one dolphin started becoming very sexually frustrated. And so the marine biologist, you know, tech person ended up like jacking off the dolphin. Okay. Yeah. There's a lot on it.

Okay. Yeah. No, I'm not surprised. I know enough about dolphins to not be too surprised by that result. But so the communication... It didn't end up working.

There was no really talking. Oh, okay. They understood them a little more, but no, dolphins did not end up talking. No dolphin words, no. They understood them enough to know that they're disgusting. Turns out they're just as awful as every other dude. Yeah. Wow. Okay. This person, gentle birth method. I gave birth with dolphins.

There's a whole article on it. I'll post it. I'll post it. I guess like if you're going to have birth assisted by any animal, I guess. Sure. Take dolphins. I'm curious. I'm really curious. I'd maybe dabble.

Okay. After that other story you just told me, you're like, yeah, sure. All right. Well, maybe we're separated by a net or something, you know? But the sonar can still get through to me. Okay. All right. Hey. We'll see how it goes. It's a long way off. I respect it. I respect it fully. Oh, man. I'm just scaring the shit out of you today. No, no. I...

My reactions are genuine, but I'm having a great time. Okay, good. You're just thinking about revenge when I come on next week. Right. That's right. Yeah. Okay. No. Yeah. All is fair in Reddit war. I'll cook up some really awful stuff. Okay. Yeah. Okay. One last one from us. We're ending on a little bit lighter of a note. You said that about several of these. Well, you found a way to make it dark. We're ending on a lighter note. So my boyfriend kills...

animals like okay i did say that was gonna get worse oh you did you did say that okay okay okay so this one from the too hot take subreddit it's four days old am i the asshole for calling my husband a dick for thinking our new home is more his than it is mine

My 35 female husband, 37 male, and I have recently moved into a new home, a bigger home, where we're hoping on raising our kids. Five female, three female, two male. Well, I do not currently work. I have a degree to get a job that will pay me well, but my husband and I both decided that I should stop working for a bit to help with the kids. My husband makes a lot, in my opinion and in general, and it's mostly his money paying for the house.

And because of this fact, he has taken a liking to calling our house, quote, his house instead of our house. This has annoyed me a bit, but I've just been going along with it. And every time I bring it up, he goes, yeah, right. I reached my breaking point about two days ago when my husband had his friends over and he made a remark saying, quote, my money did this.

I was very, very upset at the remark, but I waited until his friends left. Then I kind of flipped him off, to which I eventually called him a huge dick for continuing to say his after I told him that I don't like the phrase. He's been sleeping in the guest room since, and we haven't really been talking. I'm asking here to see if I'm the ass for what I said.

No. No, I don't think so. The hell? No. That's crazy. I would be so annoyed because we all know like stay-at-home moms and the cost. Like if you total up like each job a stay-at-home mom does, like a cook, a cleaner, like it surmounts to over six figures. Yeah. Especially nowadays. Yeah. Oh my God. I also think it's just like lonely to think that way. Like this is my house. I'm like, that's sad.

That's sad you're not sharing this space like you're not part of a team that all is together here I don't know. I just think it's like isolating yourself. I

You know, when you, you know, because there's that element of like, oh, he's putting himself above her. But it's still kind of making yourself alone in that way. I don't know. It's, I'm not surprised to come across these types of stories so much. But it's sad. I don't know what you do. I mean, she's not the asshole in this situation, but it's just like, where else is this type of behavior showing up? You know, is this the one thing where he's super selfish and shitty? Or is this...

a microcosm of a bigger thing. Yeah, it would be interesting to see if he's like that in other areas because it does kind of beg the question then, does he respect her sacrifice of staying home and taking on three kids and saving them childcare and all of those things? And she has the ability to go work. She could easily do that and contribute to the house. She's making a sacrifice and I would say arguably has the harder job

than he does of just going to work every day and getting able to check out from kids for eight hours a day. Like,

I don't understand how so many dudes think this way because if you've been around kids of almost any age, under the age of 10, for like an hour, you know of just like that's the hardest job. I could not do that. Love them, but whoo-wee. Yeah, and I mean, yeah, I think kids are awesome. I have nieces and nephew and stuff, but I –

After a day of hanging out with them, I'm like, this is brutal. Yeah. This is so tough. I think I would love being a parent, but I acknowledge that I'm like, it's so exhausting. Yeah. And if you have someone who's taking on that fully, oh my God. You should be showing them that respect and praise as often as you can. Yeah. It's goofy. And it's such a...

It's such a like schematic of something like it's, I have this pet peeve with language a lot where just changing one word just can irritate you so much. And the example I have is with like, say you have a friend, right? And your friend is talking about someone, you know, or you might even be friends with, like, it could be a mutual friend of yours, but instead of saying like, oh yeah, like, you know, our friend, Sarah, they go, yeah, my friend, Sarah. And it's like,

But I'm friends with Sarah, too. And it's so...

I don't know why it even bothers me. Like I'm hearing it now and I'm like, why is that even a thing? But it's just the language where it just feels like you're discrediting like my relationship with Sarah too. Like I want to be included. I want to be in on the fun and the inside joke. And like, I'm here too. Like, what are we? Like I live here, me and your three kids live here. And there's, there's obviously room for like slip ups. And it's been like, Oh, I'm just talking that way. But he's made it abundantly clear that,

Because he's not, it's not just slip ups. He's saying, look at what my money has bought. He fully believes this, buys it,

I don't know. And to be willing to sacrifice your relationship over something of that level, it's like, she's not asking for anything. She's asking for you to just show her respect. That amounts to no nothing for you. It would be so easy for him. The amount of times you read Reddit stories where a dude throws away a relationship for something that is physically nothing.

I'm just always blown away by it. I'm like, it's not that hard. All you have to do is say something different. All you have to do is change your thinking. Just see her point of view. Yeah. That's literally all you have to do. Yeah. Or just even apologize. Like, apologize and then correct the behavior going forward. Bro. Like... I know. I know.

This has been seen by 2.9 million people. Wow. Which that to me, like, it always blows my mind how expansive Reddit can be and how far and wide it reaches. Did that come from your subreddit? Yeah. That's crazy. Your subreddit is nuts, dude. It's popping off. I've come across it a lot over the years. It's popping. It's always so funny because we come across a story. Yeah. I'll be looking at it like, this one's awesome. I'll be like, oh, it's too hot takes. You can use it. No, no. You can use it. Other people do.

Really? Yeah. There's other podcasts that use the stories. Some of them don't give credit. Well, if we ever do, we obviously... I know. You're good people. I feel like you have to shout out the subreddit no matter what it is. I agree. Because it has different vibes. Well, it has different context too, like Petty Revenge versus AITA. Like you're going to know. Am I the Devil is when it gets real good. Yeah. Oh my God, that one. Am I the Angels? Good too. So comments have now been locked. Thank you to Outtakes moderators. Someone goes...

This reminds me of an old joke about a man who comes home from work to find his kids running wild in the front yard, still in their PJs, covered in mud. He goes into the house, and it's in total disarray. The dog threw up on the floor. The baby is screaming in his playpen with a stinky diaper. Dirty breakfast dishes are still on the table. No dinner cooked. Toys everywhere. Cran marks all over the walls. In the middle of it all is his wife, just laying on the sofa, serenely reading a book. The husband demands, quote, what the hell happened?

The wife says, well, you know how you've been coming home every night, getting pissed and demanding to know what I did all day. Today, I didn't do it. There you go. Mic drop. Yeah.

There is a little bit of an edit from OP. I didn't expect this to blow up, but let me just make some things clear. My husband isn't a narcissist or a financial abuser. The house is one of the only things he actually calls his. Most of our other things or assets he calls ours, even though he's bought most of them. This post is just mainly about the house.

No, we will not be getting a divorce. I love my husband and I know he loves me too, but he can be a bit overconfident. He's a good dad and is determined to give me and my children a nice life. Okay. So don't call it your house then, asshole. Yeah, I don't know. It's also that it's tough. It's this weird mindset of like, well, he bought it. It's like, well, no, you...

You would have that money if you weren't making this sacrifice to raise your children together. So like, I don't think it's like this idea that that's not his money. No. Like if you total up what that child care would cost, if you weren't taking care of him, if you were working a job, it would be more money than most jobs. So I don't know. I think it's.

I disagree with a little bit of that, but I trust her that this is just more like... Sometimes there's dilemmas where I view it as like a sitcom dilemma. Yeah. And I'm like, okay, this isn't a situation where you need to get divorced or you just run. That was a reach. Even for me, which I'm quick to jump to divorce. Yeah. It's just like...

I don't know. It's just like, okay, I could see this dilemma on, you know, everybody loves Raymond or something. Yeah. I wish OP would have given a little bit more context about his upbringing in the edit to just be like, you know, maybe he went through something as a child because then I could see it being more like acceptable, but,

For example, like if he grew up without a lot of money, his single mom didn't have a house, bounced around. Then I could be like, maybe he just has that scarcity mindset with money and is so proud of what he did with his money. My money did this. Maybe it's just such a point of pride for him based on those previous insecurities he dealt with.

then I'd be like, okay, I see the full picture here. I wish, I wish we just had some, some more context. That's always the tough thing with all these stories is I'm like, there could be one sentence missing that changes my whole POV on the whole thing. And obviously it all runs on the premise of like, is this person telling the truth? Yeah. But yeah, there's a million things that could always be added. Um,

And we also don't even know how he sounds as he's saying it, which to me, I'm someone like body language almost matters more than what the actual words are sometimes. So I don't know when it's stuff like this. Who knows? Most of the other stories, though, today, pretty clear. Yeah. At least the the.

the discussion was pretty simple. I wasn't, I'm not too worried about my stances on any of these. You feel like you're in the clear with the people? I think, I think most of them. Okay. And I stay pretty open-minded. A lot of times after we read stories, I read our comments and people point out

ways that I things that I missed or ways I might have been wrong and I'm always very like oh snap I yeah I hear that absolutely my opinion's often different by the time the episode even airs yes my my opinion's different and they'll be like oh Shane was wrong on that I'm like I know I literally agree oh it is so painful to be the one editing because I'll literally edit and be like

Oh my God. How did I miss that? No, no, no. Morgan, stop. Like, I want to add this in. Like, I feel the same way because there's so many different ways to analyze a problem. And like, you could have missed one detail that like totally flips it. And you're just like,

I didn't even pick up on that. I was so focused on this. I totally miss that. Happens every time. It's interesting just sitting here, listening to you tell them as opposed to reading them because I feel like I miss super key details sometimes when I'm reading it. I don't know how, like I just, a sentence as I'm reading it,

I'm not comprehending the importance of it sometimes. I don't know. Yeah. But listening to it, just purely listening to it, I feel like I catch on to a little bit more sometimes. Did you take an ACT or an SAT? Neither. Oh, you're just, yeah. I was an actor kid. Yeah, you just didn't need it. I was doing options for youth.

Just genius. Savant child star. Yeah. Yeah, sure. Sure. No, I basically didn't go to high school. That's crazy. And then I was like, all right, I'll give, I'll do college. You were a kid with a Kugel. Or what are the Kegel? Not a Kegel. Not a Kegel. Kugel. Kegel account. Everyone's dying. Pelvic floor exercise. Yeah. No. I've been doing Kegels for a while. I got a lot of money saved up. How'd your, how'd your Kugel go? It went okay. I didn't actually get, iCarly didn't pay that much. Yeah.

Yeah. No, you're not getting a lot of money from guest stars on Nickelodeon. That's a bummer. Yeah. That's the life of the actor, man. That's a tough gig. I just met another Disney star recently. And like, you would think she basically had her own show. And like,

is not like, Oh, it doesn't pay what people think. There's no money from that stuff. It's crazy. None. And no residuals either. Yeah. I was going to ask though, because I feel like I actually, it's funny you say that, like listening, you, you take in more because I'm the opposite. I get more from reading, but that's because like on the reading ACT, I got like, it's out of 36 and I got a 34 on that. So reading, reading's like my, I am absolutely a visual learner. Yeah.

And I, there's things to be both. It's just interesting that I, there's so many times where looking back and I go, how did I miss that? I was sitting there reading it. I think I'm sometimes focused on pronouncing it. Like I sometimes get caught up in performing like of, am I saying this all clearly as opposed to taking in the information? Yeah. Well, you're going in like blind, blind too. Like, you know, I don't know. I truly don't know. So that's also the thing is I'm like, I can't prep my, I'm someone who takes a minute.

You know, when I hear a story, if I can get a couple minutes to really process, my true opinion usually comes like later. Yeah. You gotta weed through some stuff. I like to mull things over. So Reddit stories is scary for me because I hear a story for the first time. Yeah. And then I'm like, okay, what is the perfect layered story?

response and view on this often complicated situation. A lot of gray area at most. And there's so much too with culture and different countries and different places and different laws where you're just going to miss because I'm like, I'm not some expert. I'm truly some guy. I try to make that clear. It's so funny how often, I think it's a little bit more of a meme

that our viewers talk about my bachelor's in psychology as if it's like, as if I'm a doctor and I'm like, it's truly nothing. I have no knowledge. I'm not qualified for anything. Just a guy out here. I'm qualified to be a bartender in LA. Okay. Not even that. But, you know. Hey. Bachelor's in psychology, okay.

That's about as much as it gets you. Okay. That's a big deal though. Psychology, that's tough. Oh yeah, it was fun. That's a tough gig. Yeah.

Yeah. Well, thank you so much for coming on. I think you crushed it. Thank you. The people will tell you. I mean, you'll know otherwise. But hey, we're just out here. We're just humans trying to, you know, cipher through the mud of Reddit and all these problems. But thank you for coming on. And where can people find you and listen to your show? Well, thank you. This has been so much fun. You can find me. I'm on Smosh, Smosh Pit, where I...

believe you'll be coming on yeah our show yeah next week and i will be reading the reddit stories um

It's going to be good. All of Shane's links will be in the description of the episode. So be sure to go check it out. Watch him reading Reddit stories instead of me for a change. I know a lot of you guys like listening to Fall Asleep and Shane's reading is really good too. So add it to the rotation. But thank you guys for being here. Again, we're on tour coming up really soon. So make sure you get your tickets because they might even be sold out.

By the time this comes out, merch is on sale and Patreon is there as always with amazing stuff. But until next time, guys, bye. Bye.