#463 - Becoming A Bidet Boy
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Welcome back to the base- Welcome back to the basement yard, Frank. How- Why are you smoldering at me? Is that what that is? Is that a smolder? Isn't it?

Yeah. You look like me in 2011. Yeah. We did New York One News, or Spectrum One News. Spectrum News One? Something. One of those. And it was really cool. Really, really cool. My boy was there. Didn't get to say hi to him. I was a little upset. Oh, yeah. Let's Go News was there. My boy Let's Go News was there. Yep. And...

What's his name again? Ted Kiernan. Got it. You tried to catch me. No, no, no. I thought his name was Ted for some reason. That's his name. You said Pat. I said... Oh, I was thinking Pat. You said Ted. That's what I meant. Wait, is it Pat now? I don't know. Uh-oh. Pat Kiernan? Ted Kiernan? Now you got to look it up. What's his name? Pat Kiernan? Maybe it is Pat. How did we just fuck that up together? I think I fucked it up and then you got caught up in my web. It might be Pat Kiernan. Pat Kiernan.

Pat? It might be Pat. Pat Sajak? No, that's not him. Pat Kiernan. Pat Kiernan. It is Pat. All right. I fucked up. So you mentally fucked me up. Yeah, I did. But you've been mentally fucked. The reason... Sorry. I didn't mean to. We're remitting him. Brunch Club merch. Bing bang. Oh, we did Spectrum News 1, which was really cool. Full circle moment. Yeah. Kind of not full circle. It was a half circle, but we made it full. I filled that circle up real quick.

That also sounded crazy, too, honestly. Yeah, it's kind of crazy. What are we doing here? There's so many innuendos. But the woman that interviewed us, the journalist, was your prom date. My prom date in high school. Your high school prom date. Yeah. I knew that she worked for New York One, and then when we put out that we were doing Radio City, she hit me up, and she was like, hey, do you want to do a segment? Had I met her before? No.

She said she didn't know if she met me. I don't think so. Because I don't remember... When you said you went to prom with her, I was like... I remember the girls that you knew in high school. And not... I'd never remember her as a topic of conversation. Well, we weren't really like... I don't mean to sound mean. I'm just saying... If you had told me you were going to prom with someone and to guess, I wouldn't have guessed her because I didn't know who she was. Yeah, yeah. Well, me and her weren't like...

We were friends in high school, but we weren't really until...

Like junior year, I would say. Okay. So like, yeah. Like my freshman and sophomore year, I don't think we talked at all maybe. Yeah. Interesting. Joey wasn't going to bring it up and didn't bring it up. Well, I told him in the green room. I was like, don't bring up that we went to prom together because I didn't think in a professional setting people would take it the wrong way or something. Because we went to prom as friends. We were cool and that was it. No one did nothing. Relax. But I thought that it would be weird. I wasn't making any accusations. I know, but I'm saying I think...

Yeah.

And then, you know, just a good time on the news. Yeah, then at the end she brought up that we went to prom together and she had a photo. Not good. I did not look good in that. You didn't. But you know what, though? To your defense, you look the way every boy of that...

age group at that time looked you know it's like when our when when like our parents would show pictures and you're like what the fuck are you wearing why is your hair like that and you're like that's what everyone did yeah you know big 80s lady hair right exactly you know you had big 2000s buzz cut buzz cut helmet it was it was like when you would go would you even say do anything or would you just say just two all around because that's what i would do um at a certain point thomas cut my hair

My oldest brother cut my hair for years. And I know what you're thinking. You can tell. Yep. You could. But yeah, because it was just buzz the hair line up and that was it. I didn't pay for a haircut from, I think, 2010 until 2016, 2017. I was the opposite. I don't think I paid for a haircut until the end of 2020. Oh, man. And haircuts for boys were such like...

It was like a thing. You know what I mean? Like for like, I remember being in like middle school and high school and someone would come with a fresh cut and they'd be like, where'd you get your fucking cut loser? It's not a fade. Like, dude, my guys are Russian. They're not Dominican. Yeah. You know, I felt like a little boy. Yeah. I don't know, but those days are over. Yeah. Now I go to a barber. It's nice. Yeah. I go to a barber too. What's your barber's name? Riley. Riley.

Riley? Yeah, he's a cool dude. Do you guys share secrets or something? No. First of all, I was very shocked to learn that he's only 19 years old. What? Yeah, dude. Okay. How long have you been with this Barb? At least six, seven months. Oh. You know, this is a new relationship. Yeah, I would go though, because I'm not the type that's just like go to an established, or I wasn't, I guess. I would just go and be like, yeah, whoever. This is when I need to show up.

Oh, you had no relationship. I was a single haircutting boy. Wow. A slut. Careful. You would have gotten a haircut by anyone. You just said, walk in, whoever wants it, take it from me. I wasn't getting haircuts often, but when I would, it was just like I'd throw my haircut boobs out and they would say like, oh. Yeah, no, you're a haircut whore is what it is. But I wasn't getting cuts all the time. Honestly, I'd get a haircut like once or twice a year.

Really? Yeah. Oh, there was that period of time where it looked like you didn't get a hair foot for four years. Two years. I just said a hair foot. A hair foot for four years. Two years as long as I went without a haircut. Wow. And, I mean, you saw. And, like, not even, like, edging up the sides or anything. I just got incredible hairlines. Yeah. I mean, you didn't look good. Can we put that out of the way? Fuck you. I think the hair looked great. I just told Boss this morning in the group chat. I was like, yo, your hair made me miss mine.

Oh, he's got long hair now. He's got long. And he's slick in it. He's slick. That's like, yeah, what are you watching? Sons of Anarchy or something? Do you remember how long my hair was? My hair was down to here, dude. Yeah, it's insane. And it was curly, so wet. It was longer. But I would always just be like, yo, I need to show up. I need to cut Tuesday. I could be there at six. Who's available? Damn. But now you're faithful to Riley. Now this dude Riley. Cool dude. I will say this, though. Nice. Say it. Anytime I get my hair cut, I feel like he's being passive aggressive with me at the end.

Why? Every single time at the end, he's just like, are we touching the eyebrows? And I go, damn, that's not bad because he's just checking in. And I go, no. And he goes, you sure? That's that. I don't like that. Yeah. It's all fun and games. He's ha ha's. But like Riley, what the, what are you trying to say? Yeah. You know, these eyebrows, these are the moneymakers. Yeah. I mean, I have a good relationship now. I'm about four.

You've been dating four years? You and your barber. My barber, yeah. I think 2020 is when I started going to him. Wow. I haven't gone to anyone else. That's really cool. I don't plan on going anywhere either. And he's, my understanding, a very famous barber. He's like a well-known barber. Rich the barber. I've never met him. I was going to say he's a cool guy. Not a single word exchanged between us. No, he's a man, dude. I literally went on Instagram and I just typed in barber. And you found him?

Maybe I googled or something like New York City barbers and he was up there and I was like mad nervous the first time I like met him. Oh, it was like a first date. I was mad nervous. You know, what's really funny is like guys with barbers. We went to Jollibee. So we kind of went on a date. You kind of did. You were dating your barber. I went when they opened the shop at like 10 a.m. So I went there and he was like, I'm at Jollibee across the street. Did he show up with like flowers or anything? No.

Yeah, dude. I showed up with flowers in his ducts. I showed up and he was like, I'm at Jollibee across the street. And I was like, oh, all right. So I just met him there. Yeah. What's Jollibee? It's like, I believe Filipino food, but it's like a chain. Oh, it's like a famous chain. It was good. I didn't have it. I haven't had it. It looked good though. So you showed up and watched him eat? No, he was just grabbing. Actually, did he eat? I don't know. But I was like, I don't know. It is funny that like,

You do have to kind of like date your bar and then you like talk like the first couple conversations are just like introductory like what's your favorite color? You know like oh, bro. I went to the barber last week They have a TV in there barbershops love having movies and shows on so they could point with their with their you know with their comb at something You know what I'm saying like oh look at this part, bro. What movie do you think they were playing? You're never gonna guess this Lord of the Rings tell ya no

The fucking... Boy in the striped pajamas. The crazy you guessed that because it's actually the girl with the dragon tattoo. Close. Very close. Boy with the this, girl with the that. Yeah. Different movies, though. And what...

And what scene do you think was playing when I walked in? Haven't seen the movie. Okay. Was she getting her tattoo? Nope. She was full on getting revenge on a guy who did some things to ladies. That was not nice. Cut his cock off? I don't remember exactly if she cuts it off. She puts something in something of his. That was not nice.

Got a sword in his ass? It's a very intense scene. Sounds like it. Definitely not a scene that you'd play in a fucking barbershop, folks. That's cool, though. You know? But, yeah, I don't like the passive-aggressive with the eyebrows. You do your eyebrows? No. I do the middle. Yeah. Okay. That's kind of it. Are you ever going to try a new facial hairstyle, or are you just committing to that? Like, you're dating your face? I almost got rid of it. And did what?

Just buzz? No, not my facial hair. Oh. First of all. Facial hair. I'm not letting my skin see the light of day ever again. No, man, bro. Okay? It's either going to get very long or it's going to be some variation of what's going on right now. Yep. But I'm not going back to clean shaving. No, you can't. It's never going to happen. You've committed to facial hair. Yes. And it's like, I heard someone once say facial hair is makeup for men. Yeah. I've seen my naked face. Ugly, dude. Pfft.

Ugly. I look like I'm sick. We shaved. What did we shave for recently? Oh, last year for the makeup. The direct clean. Well, also for the Halloween makeup. That's right. Bro, my face. I look like dog shit. I look awful. Hated it. I just my face. I look like I'm sick. You know what I mean? I don't know what you mean. You know what I mean? I have no idea. Like I got some like like a bee sting.

Uh, yes, but also like just like my I'm like discolored. It's weird Oh because it doesn't see the light it doesn't see if I if I shaved my face I'm already look at me. You know what I'm saying? I'm a piece of loose-leaf paper. Yeah, you are So under here is what you could see into my mouth through my skin. How white can I possibly be under there? It's like your asshole It doesn't get to see the light of day often. So like you wouldn't just like show people your asshole. I

Like, you would need to, like, you want it to look a certain way. Same with your unshaved, with your shaved face, I should say. Yeah. Your shaved face is your asshole of your head.

I don't know if I like you saying that. Why not? Because I don't know if it's true or not. It is true. I actually, speaking of assholes, it's crazy that this came up. I actually saw something. It's crazy that assholes came up on this show? I think you could fucking, that's a shoe-in every episode, buddy. We should play Basement Yard Bingo. We should watch one of our episodes. Someone created one once. Really? Yeah, and I saw it. Google it. Literally years ago. Oh, well, I mean, look at, oh, so it was with Danny?

No. You cheating on me too? You don't remember how long you've been doing this? Joey dates barbers and dates fucking podcast hosts. No, I, uh, like four, it was like, I don't know, within, within the four years. I'm literally looking up basement yard bingo. Oh, someone on Instagram had posted something. Yeah. So it was in May of 2020. So it was right before me. So the middle is obviously the basement yard thing. And then, yeah, it's all, it's about Danny. He's...

What are they? I'm going to read from like... Do you want to read all of them or just some? Just some. Whatever. Okay. You've heard Joe or Danny fart during an episode. It doesn't happen that often. No. Danny, it sounded like it would happen way more often. But it would... Actually, I was the farter, I think. Really? I think. I may have squeaked one out from laughing. Crazy. You've made me fart on this show. When...

I've not made you fart. Yes, you did. They finished this line, no power in the... Hamptons. There you go. Yeah. The Instagram post notifications are on. I guess they go off or something. Okay. You're a person that watches that's also subscribed to Santa Gata Studios. You always watch the show on Monday. Oh, no. I don't like this. This is not fun. It's not. It's not really fun. Yeah, it's like tag someone that's a fucking rat. I want to...

I want to like, I wish someone would make one. Oh, now it's going to happen though. Someone's going to make it. Someone's got to make a current, current day basement yard bingo, but like make it like legit. Like we say something that's like upsetting or, or Frank says something. You say something all the time. What is it? I try to entrap you or let me ask you a serious question. That's something you say. Oh, well, let me ask you a question that gets said a lot on the show. Yeah. I think that's, that's a shoe. That could be the middle part of this fucking thing. It's every, every single episode. So, uh,

But... You also said... Oh, I remember clear as day. You say that too. Clear as day. And you know what's funny? That's not a sentence. That's not a saying. It's like it's clear... Crystal clear. No, I remember... Wait. Someone recently told me like, yo, clear as day is not a saying. It's like an expression. Well, that's probably another one. You get all your expressions wrong. And I try to tell people like... I know... All my expressions wrong is crazy. I've gotten some. You...

Sometimes you do it just to fuck with me. But a lot of the times you're wrong. By one word. Like what? I can't think of anything. We recorded a Patriot episode not long ago. And I said miles an hour. Miles an hour? I was going like 60 miles an hour. It's miles per hour.

Oh, that one is more of like... That's whatever. Is it? Miles an hour? Miles per hour? But it's MPH on the little... Yeah, but like... That one is like, you know... What? It did though? I think though. But speaking of assholes. Yes. Apparently, there's something that came out recently. And it was on like a Reddit post. But it was like a Reddit thread about hygiene. And it says that like, apparently... Don't attack me here. But apparently...

Men are not supposed to wash their assholes with soap. Men or man? Probably all. Yeah, all man. All man. The collective man. Got it. Which crazy that we were just like. I knew you were going to do it. Crazy. I knew he was going to do it. How do we not include women? Men, women, man. Mankind. Mankind, I guess works, but like. Humankind. Humankind. I don't know, man.

I was gonna say, I swear, I was thinking of homo sapiens, but I was gonna fully without, like, fuck up and say homosexuals. Yeah. I was gonna be like, us, homosexuals. Homosexuals as a whole. I mean, if they must, you know, if anyone knows gay men know how to clean that fucking butt. My understanding is like, I saw a commercial recently. For a douche? For, not a douche, but like ass pills for boys.

Men, I should say. I was gonna say, say men. What do you mean ass pills? What do they do? I know someone that engages in a lot of fucking... Anal fucking... Butt fucks. Yeah. And they say that they have fun pills. And I'm like, what is a fun pill? I thought it was a drug. I was like, the hell is that? He's like, no. And he showed me a fucking thing and it's legitimately called fun pills. And it's like...

I think it's like... It loosens you up. Not loosens you up. What the hell is... I was opening up a butt. No, I figured it would be like... It like cleans them out. It's like there's like a lot of fiber in it. So like it cleans them out. So when they do butt fuck...

There's less poop. Less... Or no poop. Right. I mean, that's ideal. No poop. You know? Which is... I saw a commercial for it. I was just like, that's just a crazy thing. I guess it makes sense because you see commercials for fucking Adam and Eve and stuff like that. But a full-on commercial about... About anal fucking. Take these pills to get ready for getting railed in the ready. When we went to Fire Island some years ago...

That's like known for being like there's a heavy gay population that goes I said population Yeah, you did population that like hangs out there and on all the houses. I

Like, there's, like, a boardwalk, and then there's, like, a bunch of doors, and you open the doors, and there's, like, a walkway to go to the houses. And all those, there was this thing on the hook, on the doorknob, like, hooked onto the doorknob that was an advertisement for stuff like that. It was, like, fiber, you know, whatever. I was like, damn, dude, people are getting fucking blasted out here. Apparently, I remember a buddy of mine who is gay told me that, like...

There's like a whole regiment that goes into it. Us straights, we can wake up and just go do fuck. I don't know about all that. You gotta wash it down. I know, but I'm saying a shower. They need to eat lightly. He was going on a date and he was just like, I gotta see what soups they have. I'm like, why are you going... You know me, I love soup. But he was like, if I'm gonna have sex tonight, I need to have something not...

Like heavy. Yeah. And apparently soups is the way to go. Damn. How many, what percent of gay men do you think go their whole career without poop happening during the bedroom? I feel like it's a, it's, it's gotta be a small percentage, right? It's gotta be a small percentage. It's that's, that's statistics game. There's gotta be poop at some point in your career. I'm imagining it's gotta be like,

Every gay man probably experiences crap at a certain point. You would imagine. I do think that there's a chance that I'm completely wrong because I think that they're on top of it. Like, I got to be douching. I got to be eating salads. I don't know what you're supposed to eat. Apparently, it's like some are not as good as others at taking care of themselves. Oh, there's definitely some lazy butt guys out there. There's some.

I don't know why I'm saying that. There's some lazy butts out there. But you imagine there's definitely someone who'd be like, oh, Tommy's like the worst with that shit. Yeah, they get like a reputation. Yeah, it's like you got a dirty butt, dude. You're going to fuck this guy and he's going to shit all over you. Yeah, I imagine. Listen, I imagine gays, if you're watching. Wait, you said that like the president. Gays, if you are going to receive in any capacity, be clean.

Of course. Clean out. Do poops. I think that that's happening for sure. But wait, what are we talking about? Assholes. Yeah, why'd you bring that up? Because apparently you're not supposed to use soap to clean your asshole. What are you supposed to use? Apparently... Wait, you scrub that hole with like a bar of soap or something? Hell... Well...

I don't use the bar of soap. Right. What I do. That would be mean to whoever else uses it. I load up this area of my body. I remember you saying that. With so much soap. And then I use this one to scrape. And then I charter bus it around town.

And then you go crazy. And then I do it again. With your hand? Yeah, oh yeah. Oh, you're digging at your... It's a dig in there, yeah. Okay. It's a... Wait, why are you not supposed to do that? Because apparently it gets rid of essential oils that are supposed to protect your anus. Oh, so your ass is like... Apparently my ass is like ready for lice or something. Yes. Remember they told us that in elementary school? Like, you shouldn't wash your hair every day because lice love a clean head.

Really? You don't remember that? I didn't know that. Yeah, man. I had no idea. But, okay, so you're scrubbing that thing. Don't sit there and ask me as if you're not. What was that? It sounded like an old door. What was that? It sounded like a Florida Goosebumps episode. What did you just say? A Florida Goosebumps episode? A floor in a Goosebumps episode.

You know what? Guys, you can't hear them all. No audience in here to tell me that was bad. I don't need one for that. That was insane. Yeah, no, I've definitely put soap on my fucking bum for sure. Well, you have to. Yeah, I mean. Bro, I don't trust my ass. Well, now I don't know on my what. Now, yeah, now you got to use not soap, dude. I need to buy a bidet.

Dude, I want one. I used to have one. Gio has one, so like when I go to his... They're sick. They are. They are cool, but... It's weird. Bro, your ass is just soaked. I know, but then you gotta damp it dry. Dap it. What is that? What am I looking for? Damp. Dap. Dab. Dab. Dap it in your asshole.

All right, big guy. Good job, buddy. Yeah, dude. You got to dab. I can't say it again. Dab it up. I used to do that, but then I would get – I had cheap toilet paper, and I'd get toilet paper stuck in my ass. And it would get stuck in your ass. Because you ever have wet toilet paper, and then it just falls apart and it's everywhere? Yeah. Then I would just be walking around with just like a fucking –

Debris of toilet paper in my ass all day. Yeah, I didn't like it Yeah, get it you can so I gotta get the thick ones like the Charmin bears what you can get actually No, you do you have black toilets in your place? No, they're white. Are you sure or is are black? Are you sure I live there? I use it every day. It's white. Okay, it's why you can get You can get an attachment

To go on your toilet to make it a bidet. I know. That's what I did. Oh, you have one in your house. No, no. I had one at the house in Astoria. No longer have it. Right. Might get it again. But I am very afraid of one of the kids because it's just a knob. Yeah. One of the kids is going to turn that shit on and that shit flies. It does. It has a fucking... Wait, if you use Geo's? Yeah. Isn't that a little dirty to use someone else's bidet? Yeah.

It's not powered by his asshole. It's just water. But his asshole was just getting fucking squirted on too. He also shits in it. I night shit in it. What do you want me to... How is that weird? Explain how that's weird. Would you use your friend's dildo? It's not like that. It's not the same water as the one that... It's not spraying his ass and then staying in. Just gotta say, he didn't even say no to using any dildo. Fuck it.

Not using any dildos, Frank. I'm sorry. I'm going to get you a bidet. You can get it installed. Ask the building to install it on your toilet. Ask the building. I'm not asking them. Put in a work order for it. Why not? Because I'm just going to do it. You know how to install a bidet? There's instruction manuals. Yeah, Joey. It's kind of like you have to know plumbing, kind of. No. Yeah. You have to shut the water supply, take the thing off, and plug it in. It's fucking nothing. That's knowing plumbing. Knowing plumbing, turning the water off?

Stupid! You gotta make sure you do the right connections because the one that I had had hot water as an option. Just getting blasted in the ass by hot water. Yo, a burnt hole? Forget about it. No, no, no, not hot like it's gonna be dangerously hot. Oh. You just said hot, bro. You didn't say warm. Alright, alright. Warm water. What, what, you think I'm pouring fucking boiling water in my ass? I didn't know what you meant! No, come on, you should know, bitch. I don't know.

The one at Geo's is a little warm. But apparently we're not supposed to use soap to clean our bunk. So are you off soap now? No, I have to, dude. Why? What do you mean off soap? I have to use soap. You don't follow the science? I don't care what Reddit says. You gotta follow the science.

This is one of those places where I'll let science be wrong. Well, no, you're gonna choose to be wrong. I'm gonna choose to be wrong about science. Yeah. What do I need my asshole to be protected by? Oils to protect my anus from... Bacteria? What do you mean? That's why you wash it away. Wash the bacteria gone. But then you sweat into your butt. And bacteria from skin, water, sweat, drip down, spine, into butt. Come on, why can't I just wash my ass? Maybe that's why.

No, it's definitely, definitely not why, but it's a theory. It's a working theory. I promise you it is a theory we have already debunked. Well, we do have ads for right now. We'll get back to, uh, debunking scientific fact in a bit. Uh,

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what's the word i'm looking for hydrated okay uh and actually frankie at our last show he's like i brought a bunch of liquid iv so that everyone could be good because we had two shows on an after party make sure you guys are hydrated because if you're dehydrated you're not gonna make it through um but yeah so it helps you um stay hydrated um there's a bunch of electrolytes in it i mean it hydrates you better than a glass of water would you just take a glass of water you add this powder to it you mix it up it

They taste delicious. That's the best part, honestly. Even when I'm feeling super hydrated, I'm like, you know what? I'm going to pop one of these just because I like a little, have a little drink. Okay. It makes me feel like I'm drinking a little candy soda or something like that. But it's delicious. But yeah, Liquid IV, amazing. They have an optimized ratio of electrolytes, essential vitamins, and clinically...

clinically tested nutrients that turn ordinary water into extraordinary hydration. And you can get some right now when you go to liquidiv.com and use the code basement at checkout, you will get 20% off. Okay. So 20% off of your first order when you shop better hydration today, but using the promo code basement at liquidiv.com. Go get it, Frank. Man, you know, each week I come here, I talk to you and this week I got some

Strange news. Bad news. I'm kidding. It's not bad news. It's about Patreon. I got you. I pranked you. You got... I got... It's a joke.

Go to patreon.com slash TheBasementYard and sign up today so you can get these weekly episodes one week in advance and then that second tier while you get weekly episodes every single Friday. Folks, you fucking got us over 32,000 paid patrons. It is mind-boggling. Crazy. This whole life that we're living, we often say to each other, like, this is nuts. Literally, at the after party, Greg and I had our arms around each other and I whispered in his ear, not whispered, I probably screamed because of the music. I go, what is our life? We have children. So, thank you for making our life...

minor emotional mental mind fucks for us. We really appreciate it. Patreon.com/TheBassBanyard and then folks, if you're coming to any of these shows, we still have some more shows coming up. I mean, as of recording, we got LA and Seattle in front of us. Actually, at the time you've seen this, those were already done. Sorry, see ya. But then Toronto's coming up and then we got some Texas shows. Hey, D-D-Darling. That was British, not Southern.

Go to TheBasementYard.com slash submit. Submit your stories, your topic, anything that you can answer, like questionnaire, and then maybe we'll talk to you, talk about you. There was a girl at our last show who had a tattoo above her lady parts that said heavenly, and we brought it up, and she was sitting three rows back. So it was a very easy conversation. We spoke to her. She spoke to us also. There was a girl there who was into piss play, and we spoke to her. It could be you. So go check it out, TheBasementYard.com slash submit. Thank you, guys. We're so excited, and let's keep this fucking party going.

Yeah. And also, she was very much into piss play. Her friend outed her, dude. Her! Literally. Yeah, literally. First of all, you screaming is crazy. I know. I did that. I tried to do it away from her. I scared the shit out of me. I'm sorry. Take it the fuck easy. I'm sorry. But yeah, her friend was like, it's her. And then I was like, are you into pissing upon or...

Receiving. And she said yes. Yeah, she liked both. Which is good. Crazy, dude. Are they playing Apollo piss? I don't know. I don't know. Piss, brother. Yeah. I don't think I could pee on someone or get pissed on. I could definitely pee on someone. What? How hard is it to pee? But like when you're in the middle of doing thump, you're not in piss mode. Oh, I mean you can't be in the middle. The railroad tracks, instead of piss, it goes to fucking... It's got to be before or after.

When you have a piss. But like, if you're liking it, you're horny. So like the horny starts. So you assume it's before. So the horny starts. Yeah. Absolutely crazy. But good for you. Honestly. We don't shame the kinks. We don't kink shame here. Joey might. I don't. We ask questions though. We do have a lot of questions. Yeah. And we did. We did have questions. We had some.

We had some. We had some. That's why you said that. If you want to be kept anonymous, you can just ask to be kept anonymous and we won't talk to you. If you want to be anonymous, don't bring your friend who is going to scream that it's your card. Yeah, yeah. That was a little mean. The girl with the heavenly tattoo, though, was like, I have a tattoo of the word heavenly and she went, that's me! Yeah. She gasped. She goes, that's me! Yeah. It was great. It was a fun time at that show. Always cool to have those kind of interactions, but we

What are you gonna do? Anyway, don't wash your ass with soap anymore because you will... I need to, dude. If I don't wash my ass with soap... Legit, if I go... You gotta get bidet. Bidet. Lukewarm water. Dude, no. No, no, no, no, no. I need to shower. I need to shower. Of course. You have to shower too. I know, but I'm just saying, like... What do you mean, don't wash your ass with soap, dude? You know what's back there? The science said it! I don't care what science said. I'd rather my ass smell like fucking, you know, Irish spring than...

Yeah. Those are the two words that he was working on for that long, and he came up with Irish Spring and crap. Yeah, I know, but science. Do you trust your asshole's normal, natural smell? Hell no. No, you give it water. Give it hell. Hell doesn't get rid of scent. Yeah, it does. No, it doesn't, dude. I don't know. When's the last time you washed your back? Never. What about below your knees? I do that often.

Neck to knees is the cleanest. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, sometimes I get a little below ankles that haven't seen soap in a while. Bottom of my feet? I haven't done that in a while. I've watched the bottom of my feet because every time, like, I've done that. I used to do it a lot, but then it became just this dangerous game. Because if I'm in a... I should probably do it now because there's grip on the floors of my...

I was just going to say lay down. If you're in a porcelain tub with a shower like that, bro, dangerous. I'm going to crack my head open. What I would do, I would just lay down. It's easier that way. You would lay down and put your feet under the water? Yeah, so what I would do is I would lay down. I would bring my feet to me. I'd scrub the bottom of them, and then I'd put them up in the water. I wish that I had a security camera and I could just watch you do these things. I'm back up a little bit. No, no. I see it. I get here. I do this. I do this.

*whisper* Yeah. And then I... Unbelievable stuff. And then I let the water get it. Not anymore! 'Cause you don't have a... You don't lay down in the shower now. Bro. No, no, no. I haven't in a while. I sit. Sometimes. You sit in there? Well, I have like showered and like Ruby has come in and showered with me and I sit down. We'll say this: anytime any of the kids get in the shower with me, I'm wearing boxers because I do not want my children to remember my wiener in any capacity.

Do you remember your dad's dick? Sadly, yeah. I remember my dad's dick too, bro. Yeah, sadly I do. That's mad weird. So like if I leave the door open or if they're coming in with, you know, because we call it like Ruby likes to do like the car wash. She brings her little toys in and she like car washes them. My dad called it the car wash. Yeah, my dad called it the washer machine. What the hell? Yeah, I don't know. Maybe a Colombian thing.

I don't know, I shouldn't have said that, right? Definitely shouldn't have referenced washing clothes to being a Hispanic thing, you racist pig. If anything, that would make us whites look bad. There's plenty out there to make you look bad already. I don't need to do much. Not wrong. But I wear boxers. Yeah. Because I can't. Yeah, I would probably do that too. It's just weird.

want it it's just weird you know and i'm not like you know i think that people can probably do that and it's fine i just i don't know yeah to each their own personal yeah this is a personal thing there's also people out there that like are like nudists and the whole family's naked running around the house that's a little much for me i bro what is are there what's the closest nudist colony to here i've never seen anything like that knowing knowing the land it's got to be long island

Knowing the land. What does that mean? Like knowing how trashy Long Island is as a place, period. I don't think that nudist colonies are trashy. It's just they're just like... I know. I'm just saying Long Island is a piece of shit. The land? Yeah. Why is the land a piece of shit? Because look at what it has bred. Crazy. Everyone has that one part of their town where they're just like, everyone from there sucks. Long Island is that town for New Yorkers. Let me tell you. It's not a town.

It's a full island. A full island. And technically we're on it. Yeah, technically we are on it. But yeah, I wonder where they are. Because when I think of nudist colonies, I think of trees. Look up closest nudist colony. Nudist colony near me. Yeah, look it up. Honestly, I never thought to even do this. They do meet and greets? Nudist colony. How do you get into a nudist colony? You just got to show up? Show up naked? Initiation fees or something? No, there's got to be. It's got to be like a weird, they need to test you. Like, how naked are you?

How naked are you? Like during like the person administering the test like sits like legs wide open Just to see how uncomfortable they are. I'll tell you what they're all it looks like they're all in Jersey What? Yeah Get the hell out of here. There's no nudist colonies in Jersey. Bro, what are you talking about? There's a bunch of trees and stuff in Jersey. There's a bunch of trees everywhere. Not like that. There's more trees there. Uh, oh, here we go. This is a country club. It's got 4.9 stars.

And it's a nudist? It's a nudist colony. It's got stars, baby. Wait a sec. And it's got a phone number. Here's the first question. Honestly, this is kind of cool. Do they have like an application process? Look at their website. See if they have an application. Day rates are around $35. So $35, you just hang out naked all day. Someone said, is it free to get in? And then a local guide said, no, day rates are generally around $35, worth every penny. Crazy. First of all, country clubs, that's what it is?

No, it's not just a country. This is called like a country club. I don't know that they like have like a, I don't know. Country club. It's co-ed. It's co-ed. Okay. Is no clothes optional? The grounds for the most part is clothing optional. In the pool, hot tub, you must be nude. I guess that makes sense. I guess there's a level of like you're hiding at that point then. Like you're hiding, your shit's underwater. And the way you know like...

My water penis is... The worst penis. Oh, my God. Mine, I'm referencing. I've never seen your water penis. When was the last time you had a water penis? Have you bathed recently? Yeah. I bathed in the hotel because my shoulder... Oh, my neck is fucked up. It's actually better today. But... Oh, there's cabins. You can rent a cabin. What's a cabin at this nudist comedy? How much... How much...

Someone can't write. But how much is the daily cost to rent a cabin? Is there any discount for seniors over 65? Michael. If anything, seniors should pay more. Yeah. Yeah. They've been through enough. Yes. They've been through enough. No, they should pay more. They've set up this whole fucking world that we're living in. I don't know if this one's still... Look, if you need to pay to get into a nudist colony...

Over a certain age, you should pay more. Like men 65 and up should pay like $200. There's one open. This one has a 4.8 star. Well, I don't love that. Oh, nope. Oh, is it? I can't see. I honestly, I'm not even kidding. I can't see. It's just people at a bar that are like naked. That's crazy. That's wild, dude. Where is that? This is in Jersey. Damn. Oh, no, this is PA. Also damn. Oh, okay.

Got a pool, three foot deep, everyone's naked. The drinks look good. Look like a nice frozen drink. Oh my god, the best mojito I've ever had in my life. Let's go get it. Imagine someone's just like, yo, you want to get the best mojito you've ever had in your life? They're like, yeah, and they just strip naked and walk into this place. They do have events. Partying naked since 1945. What the hell? They have? What events do they have? Um... If you're like in like a band and you show up... Bro, hold on. Do you need to be naked? Maybe...

What the fuck? But they have like this one Sunday 3 p.m. to 7 p.m. live poolside music by One Left Nut. Get the fuck out of here. Says it. Get the fuck out of here. There's a petting zoo. Oh, that's dangerous. No, I think it says dress as a farm animal or furry.

Wait. Yeah, I think they're the petting. They're the one who... They get pet. Yeah, this is fucking... If you're into nude stuff... What part of Pennsylvania? If it's Philadelphia, I'm going to piss my pants. No, it's not Philly. It's... I actually don't know. That's just the address. I just know it's in Philly. I don't know where it is. It is in Philly? No, I mean, not Philly. I mean, PA. Yeah, there's a... One Left Nut, he performs here all the time. Or she. I imagine people see him all the time. Yeah, there's a lot going on here.

Can you... I need to... Oh, groovy body paint theme. That one's probably fun. Mardi Gras, that can get crazy, I imagine. Deck party with turning the tide. Yo, listen. You need to hit up a manager for this place and get him on OPL. I mean, dude. Fucking go crazy, man. These guys, they're probably living it up. It's like a resort. Everyone's fucking naked as fuck. There's pools. There's a...

There's a full volleyball court. All the players naked. Can you imagine? It's one thing to be naked walking around. Playing volleyball naked. Forget it. Flopping wiener. Imagine if there was a basketball court and someone dunks on you butt fucking naked. That would be wild. A wild posterization there. Bang. Balls. Not taking any charges, dude.

That's crazy. Good for them, man. They're going crazy. I never knew, but yeah. I never knew either. Out there kind of like in the woods because you can't be like walking around like Metro City naked. Zero percent chance I would ever do one of those. You? I couldn't. I don't know. I'm too like... I'd walk in like, hi. I feel like if... I feel like I could if...

If we were doing it, being like, yo, we gotta do this. I would do it. I don't know. No. Because Joey next week is going to be like, yo, 40,000 patrons. You want to go to a fucking... And I'll be like, no! You do that! No, I wouldn't. Um...

I think like if we were doing like you know how Nicole Richie and Paris Hilton had that fucking show? The surreal life? Oh no not the surreal life the simple life. Yeah where they like they're like worked on a farm and like if it's something like that then like I could probably I could probably So if a big company like a big media mogul Disney no they're not gonna do this one. Uh. Ew. Discovery Max. Discovery because they own HBO now. Oh. 30 million a year each.

30 million? Why are you saying that like no? Yes. All right. They're not listening. We'll take 12 million a year. Oh, wow. You cut a great deal. I mean, that is... For what? To go on a nudist colony and just live? To have our own show. Maybe one episode, but we'll get it. Yo, you have to admit, though. We'll say we don't want to do it. But listen, you have to admit. No, I don't. No, no, no. I don't have to do anything. No. When you go skinny dipping, because I know you've gone skinny dipping before. It's kind of...

Better. No. Swimming naked is better. Absolutely not. It is. I don't know whom... Why do you not think that? Because it sucks. Why does it suck? Because there are fish that can touch your cock. In a pool? I don't think I've ever been skinny dipping in a pool. I've only been in a lake. It's scary. I've done it in a lake in a pool. It's like it's... Which pool have you skinny dipped in?

I mean, I had a pool. You skinny-daped in your own pool? Yeah, I taped. Really? Yeah. When? With whom? I don't know. I've done it. Skinny-dipping at a pool in an alleyway in Astoria seems like a crime. Yeah, well, it was my own pool. Still seems like a crime. But, like, I've been in there and been like, I'm taking these up. Throw them on the deck. I've done that. What the hell? I don't know why. Yeah, of course. If you have a pool in your backyard, dude. Other pools? You're going to dip. I don't know.

Whose pool have you skinny dipped in? I don't know. I know that I've done it in mine. I know. I don't have a pool, so I'm fucking safe. Some of our friends had pools, though, so he's obviously not safe. Who had a pool? Several of our friends had pools. There was the one, like, trap house we would go to that had a pool. Never in there. Danny had a pool. Danny had a pool? Oh, yeah, he did have a pool. Oh, maybe. Maybe I have daped on that pool. You daped in that one? Maybe. Why? A dare? I don't know.

Damn. I'm not doing it for like some crazy reason. I skinny dipped in the lake and I was afraid. We skinny daped together. Do you remember that? Slow down. We weren't holding hands or anything. We did it at the age of 19 because girls said that they would do it if we did it. So we were like the idea of seeing tits. Yeah. Is worth the possibility and honestly probability of seeing each other naked.

I don't think the sentence, like, if you guys skinny dip, then we'll skinny dip. And we were already in the water. Yeah. I think we might have even suggested it. Like, we'll skinny dip, and then you skinny dip. And then we were already in the water before they ended. Yeah, no. Crazy. The amount of stuff that 19-year-old boys would do to just see tits. Like, we knew people that two guys, do you remember this? No. Two guys were like, they asked a girl, they were like, if we kiss each other, will you show us your boobs?

And they did it. The fuck? Crazy. You're just young idiots. Young, dumb, and? Free. You don't know that saying? What? Young, dumb, full of gump. Oh. The fuck? I guess we have more ads. Thanks. Jesus. I was thinking the Weez Khalifa song. Oh, that Weez Khalifa song. That little Weez Khalifa song. Little Weez Khalifa. I like him. He got that song black and yellow. Yeah.

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You don't know. Nope. Oh, I forgot. Skinny dipping? Were we there? Oh, we were talking about date. Yeah, we were talking about skinny dipping. Yeah, we were talking about that. Hey, man, what are you going to do? Haven't done it in a while, though. Me neither. I couldn't tell you last time. Technically being in the tub is skinny dipping. Why do they call it skinny dipping? What is it even like that? Yeah, mine should be called fat girthy dipping. Giant, massive dipping. Yeah, who the hell... Double dipping. Who the hell came up with the term skinny dipping? Yeah, if anything...

Can you look that up? Can you look up the origins of the term "skinny dipping"? Let's look it up. I want, like, it should be like massive fucking big, big bulbous dipping. Crazy girthy dipping. Oh, we're fucking idiots. Why? It comes from you only being in your skin. So... It should be skin dipping. Yeah, but that's not skinny dipping. That sounds like something a fucking Marvel villain does. You're dipping your bare skin into water of some sort. Bathing naked, swimming nude.

I don't know. Bro, people that skinny dip in the ocean, I'm convinced, are just asking to get eaten. Do you think a little piece of bathing suit is going to save you from something? Yeah. What? Howt. What and howt? Bro, I was a full-on water pisser, and then someone told me that, like, oh, you piss in water now, and there's this bacteria that finds your stream, fucking swims up into your cock, and makes your giant...

Big hog. Explode. Just this big old dong of a dick. Yeah. Just absolutely just like explode and now I'm terrified to pee in any body of water. Not that I'm often in bodies of water. Well, you said that you were like a pisser. I was a big water pisser. Bro, the lake? I would sit in the lake all day. I've peed in the lake. Bro, at the lake, we would sit there and we would... We would sit in the middle of the lake on life jackets. We would have a cooler of beer with us and I would piss...

So much, dude. So much piss. Why are you yelling? And like, I wouldn't play it cool either. I would just be like, yo, I'm pissing. Like, that's the dream. What's the dream? Just being able to just piss. You can. You have the dream. You're living it. We've mastered plumbing. You can piss wherever. Basically. No, you can't. You want to piss in public? Us as a nation have done a disservice to public bathrooms. Bro, you see the public bathrooms in like Japan? They're like self-cleaning and shit.

We need to get better with that. Could you pee or put in one of those bathrooms that like is like a double mirror? Like when you're in it, it's like in time. You could see everyone, but it's like you get in, you lock it and it gets like opaqued. Yeah. Hell no. I'd be like, yo, I'm shitting and everyone's looking at me. Hell no. My body wouldn't poop. I wouldn't. I mean, pee. I could pee anyway. I got to pee right now. Don't. I'm doing the classic pee pinch. I don't think that's good for you. It's not. It's definitely not crazy. It's all right.

It isn't. You're pinching your wiener. On stage, in your pocket, pinching. It was just like once or twice. Yeah. And then I suck in so there's less pressure on my... Bladder? Bladder, yeah. I don't think scientifically that's correct. Anyway, also want to talk about the Olympics. Have you watched? Not a single second of it. I watched a little bit in the coffee shop this morning. I watched... What? Because I went to a coffee shop? No, just go. Just go.

They had it on the TV. Going to a coffee shop to watch the Olympics is so stupid. I didn't go to... I got to... I went to get coffee, you dumbass. Okay. All right, go on before I flip. The things that you choose to get upset at are ridiculous. Before I flip. I don't give a fuck if you flip. No, I watched highlights of Simone Biles because, I mean, we said it previously in another episode, like, she is not human. Do you remember her boyfriend came out and he said some stupid shit where he was just like...

I'm not Simone Biles' boyfriend. She's my girlfriend. People are like, hey man, read the fucking room. You are not Simone Biles. I don't remember what that was, but yeah. Gymnastics is one of my top faves. I like watching that. I like swimming. You know what? I like the horse. The pummel horse? What the hell is that? It's the thing. Oh, where they just spin their body? Yeah, they do all types of shit and then they flip off of it. Have you ever tried to do the rings? I've tried and...

Take a wild guess how that went. Not good. Yeah, bad. You probably just hung from them. I did. And that didn't even happen, like, too long. I've gotten on a balance beam before, and I'm like, just walking across this is difficult. Like, crazy shit. I've run that, like, runway to, like, that little trampoline. You jumped off that? I did. I did. I did. I did. Oh, I'm not doing that. It was crazy. I almost lost both my ankles. Bro, one time I was watching the Olympics, and a guy was doing the...

The pummel horse thing. And he fucking fucks up his hand. And he's like, walks over to his coach and his finger is like dislocated. Fuck. Come on. What are you doing? It's going this way. I don't believe that. How hard could that one be? His coach was just like, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap.

Two. Thank God. If you were coming with a third, I was getting ready to pummel your horse. I know. And then he just got on the horse and then did some sick routine. I feel like the spinning, that's not too hard. The flips and jumps and stuff, that's the stuff that's hard. The rings is crazy. All of it is hard. I don't think the one where you just move your legs around. Try it. I think I could do it. I think that you think you can too. But I know that you can't.

I think if you give me... Because I'm currently training to dunk a basketball. If you give me a month of solid training, I could do it. Not at a gold medal level, but like... I'll give you five years, Frank. I'll give you five years. Fucking kidding me. Why did I bring that up? Oh, the Olympics thing. So the... What's it called? The... What's that shit called? The intro? What's it called? The opening ceremonies? Ceremony. Yeah. The... What's... I don't know why. I didn't remember what it was. But...

Opening ceremony Apparently there was like A scene A part in that Where there was just like A dude like Naked on a fruit plate Or something The dude naked And then he was blue Yeah I saw that First of all Gotta say I've never been naked On fruit But that sounds crazy Yeah I would love to lay On a bed of grapes

Tell me that wouldn't- That's probably nice. I was gonna say, tell me that wouldn't feel sick. Or just completely covered in grapes. Like, imagine being submerged in grapes up to your neck. Do you know how bad I wanna run- I wanna, like, stomp my own grapes? Do you know how bad I wanna do that? You could.

Do you know how bad I want to, though? Go do it. Do you have, like, the little balls? And, like, you're just, weep, weep, weep, weep, weep, weep. If you go to, like, something. I'm sure there's, like, a winery that allows people to do that. Oh, that would be so cool. Imagine laying. What fruit would you, like, be most excited to lay in? Grapes. I like grapes. That's the only fruit you can think of. I mean, I guess any berries. Blueberries. No, it, like, stains your skin. You think grapes don't? No. Like, legit grapes that make wine? Mm-hmm.

Yeah... No, they don't. No, like blueberries, bro? Blueberries would be cool. I have wanted, like, I've seen, like, people bobbing for apples, and I want to get in that. You want to bob? I want to bob with the apples. I've never, I've never done that. It seems very hard. I don't have a huge mouth. I feel like I have bobbed an apple before. Have you? Yeah, I think so. Do you have to stick your face in the water? You're supposed to get an apple, and by any means necessary.

What a ridiculous thing. Yeah, crazy that we decided that was a game. Candy apples, by the way, garbage. I used to be a big candy apple fan. Really? I haven't had one in years. You know what's fucking garbage? Cake pops.

WACK! Shut the fuck up. You like cake pops? Hell yeah, I love cake pops. Dry, falling apart. Yo, big cake pop. Then you've had a bad cake pop. It's literally like eating drywall. No, they're whack. You've had bad cake pops then. Real cake pops are not dry. Wack. You cook the cake.

And then you mix in frosting. And that's your pop, baby. Whack. No, dude. You've not had a good... Joey said it. Dry, drywall. You've had bad cake pops. I mean... I've had such fucking good cake pops. Where do you get them? Because the only time that you get a cake pop is like leaving a communion party. Starbucks has them.

But I also- I'm not going to- I know, but like also I've been to like several parties. My sister-in-law, I think it's like Parties by Sabrina or whatever. Go check it out. She makes fucking cake pops. Good cake pops. I'd rather have a slice of cake. Give me a slice of cake. Sure. But cake pops are the best part of the cake on a stick. Most shit on a stick is whack.

I don't- I don't- You know those like, uh, cookies on a stick? Trash. What the hell is a cookie on a stick, Joey? It's like you get them at the same thing. It's like a communion or something. It's like wrapped in plastic. Joey, I've never had a cookie on a stick. And I don't think you know what the fuck you're talking about either. No, it's like a cookie. No. Food on sticks is way, way, way good. Yo, you know what's fucking banana pants? On a stick? Korean corn dogs.

Bro, they have them by me and I- I- Becca and I said we wanted to get them. Are they- are they? Unbelievable. Damn, we have to. Unbelievable. Hot dogs and cheese. It's- the amount of times we talk about food and I leave here and I'm like, I want to eat all of the shit right now. Bro. Is honestly impressive. For 4th of July, we went to Gio's and he bought two boxes of like Korean corn dogs.

That will kill you probably. That took a day off my life. But my God, they're so good. And they have the other ones that have, they're like dipped in whatever the fucking, whatever that is. But they have like little slices of, not slices, but like little cubes of potatoes on it, around it too. So it's like, damn! Crazy. What? Good that you were low with that. Yeah, yeah. I was staying low. You get a little higher, you get a little crazy. Fucking play that game or anything. Now I'm hungry for fucking dogs. Get a Korean corn dog. Also, you dip it in like a Chipotle mayo.

That's a top three condiment. It is, bro. I wouldn't say that. Who's your podium? Hot sauce. It's like I've asked you this so many times. Hot sauce. Is your gold? I would say gold. Wow. Ketchup barbecue. Mayo. Regular mayo is four. Chipotle mayo. Chipotle mayo you can dip shit in. You're dipping like fries into mayo? No, but I'm not. No. How much mayo are you eating? No. What's going on over there? Blue. Blue cheese up there.

Blue cheese. Blue cheese. Way higher than mayo. Yeah. Mayo sucks. All right. We got to end this episode. Not that it sucks. It's just like, it's just not like, like it's not. I don't know about that. I don't like you right now saying blue cheese. No, blue cheese is up way higher than mayo. Okay. I thought you were saying blue cheese sucks. No, no, no. Mayo. Like compare. I mean, blue cheese. Mayo's good. I like mayo. I have no problems with mayo. Mayo and I. Feta, bro. Feta or blue cheese? Oh, feta. A thousand. I'm talking the blue cheese dressing, not like blue cheese. How do you feel about ranch?

Bro, people lose their shit for ranch? So okay. I'm so confused by it. So middle of the road okay. Why is ranch this like cult thing?

I like, bro, I like ranch. I don't have no issues with ranch. It's fine. But like, don't like these people that put it on everything. Get the fuck out of here, dude. Yeah, like I've seen people like put the powder and like drink it in water. Like you guys are nuts. Those people need to be shot in the back of the head. I'd like ranch, but bro, it's not, it's not a top three. I take it back. They need to be shot in the front of the head so they can see the gun coming and be terrified because of their actions. Ranch is not a top three. No, it's not. It's not. Barbecue's above it.

Way above it. Chipotle mayo's above it. Whatever. Hot sauce is above it. Salsa. Is salsa in this game? You can't put salsa in this game. Can you put guac in the game? It's not a condiment. Neither is salsa. Ugh.

Yeah, no. Both of them are the same thing. Salsa is middle of the road. Salsa is guac, bro. No. Those are the same thing. Guac is its own thing. Explain how those are different. They're used the exact same way. The consistency. The thickness. Idiot. The viscosity. Where you put it on shit. It's the same thing. A taco. You put guac on a taco, too. Yeah, but it's thicker. So? I don't like what you're doing here. I don't like what you're doing. Frank's checked out. I can tell. No, I have to pee like a racehorse, but I'm just saying. I don't like this fucking...

Salsa is a condiment. If salsa, well then guac. No, guac is too thick. That's not how that works. Yes, it is. Not everything's black and white, Joey. I know how often you're sitting there and screaming at the world. This is what he does when he doesn't have a rebuttal. He's going to try and make me sound racist. I was going to try to make you sound racist. Go take a piss. Where can they find you? Not here. Don't shoot. I don't know.

I'm pissing in your pants right now. What would you do if I pissed my pants right now? Frank, I swear to God, I will Venmo you 600 bucks if you stand up right now and piss in your fucking gray sweatpants. Not enough. 600, not enough. What is enough? $60,000.

Where can they find you? Because I'm not doing that. I've always had it all over for him. You guys can follow me at Joe Santagato. Patreon. Patreon.com slash TheBasementYard. The Frank Alvarez and all the foreign social media. And then TheBasementYard everywhere. You know where to find him. He's big internet baby. That's enough. Guys, go follow the show at TheBasementYard on TikTok and Instagram. And that is all. See you guys next time.