#2616 RHOP 0906: The First Crack
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Hello and welcome to Watch Where Crap Ends, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today, Ronnie Karam. Hi, Ronnie. How are you? Well, hello. How are you? I'm doing great. Thanks. Happy Veterans Day. It's Veterans Day here in the States. Did you have a nice weekend?

I sure did. I built myself a new couch desk. So today I'm doing this from my new couch desk, everybody. Hello out there. This is a new, more relaxed me today. Hope you enjoy it. I'm already thrilled by it. So today we are talking about the Real Housewives of Potomac. Before we get into that, we've got...

We've got all our stuff on Patreon. You should go check out. We have just converted to a monthly setup. So now it's just when you support all that stuff about like, oh, Capit, da-da-da-da-da. You don't have to worry. You can just support it. It's like every other Patreon that's out there now.

There are a few little growing pains. So if you notice something strange with your billing, just message us on Patreon and we will tend to it because we're not trying to mess with anyone or anything. So go check that out. And you can see our lovely faces. You can see Ronnie's brand new setup and his brand new microphone. And aside from that, you know, we got a fun week of recap. So let's dive into some Potomac, shall we?

Let's do it, buddies. Well, it's still Wendy's birthday. Good Lord. How long has it been Wendy's birthday? Jesus Christ is going to turn 50 by the time they stop celebrating this birthday. I don't understand this lining people up to celebrate you like this. I don't do this at all.

I'm like, you want to go to Target? Maybe. Maybe I'll ask somebody to Target on my birthday. Maybe occasionally a happy hour or something. But the full-on giving speeches and what you've done for me, no, I'm not doing that. Get the fuck out of here. I'm already buying you a present and probably your dinner. You don't get a speech. How about Ronnie bought my dinner tonight and here's why I love Ronnie. And then give a speech about me. What the fuck am I giving you a speech for? You got all the presents. You got everything for free. Wow, you were born. Congratulations.

It is funny because later in the episode, Wendy has this realization that, you know, she is enough. Like she doesn't need all these things. She is enough. And then it's like, but also tell me all the good things about me. Because I'm like, I would say I'm 95% enough, but I need the other 5% filled in by you guys. So tell me all the great things I've done. Thanks.

Well, that was also interesting because she was like, well, you know, you guys have known me through so much. I had babies and then I've had all these business ventures. And now I realize I don't need business ventures. I'm enough. No. What happened to your candles? I want to know.

Also, what's the truth about your assistant professorship? I want to know things. No one's enough. Base yourself on work only. I'm just kidding. I don't think this couch desk is working. I was supposed to be in a better mood. Well, we open up. The cliffhanger was Stacey sitting down, Karen, and saying, should I be worried about you? The girls are saying that you need to go to rehab. Should we be concerned, Karen? And Karen's like, hmm.

Thank you. Thank you, Stacy, for asking me. And no, no, you should not be concerned. The one who should be concerned is every traffic median in the country. Because you never know what I'm going to come feel. Don't speak bad about me. I'll tell you who should be concerned. Dear, dear, who are trying to confuse me every time I go out on the road. I'm watching you, dear. Um.

And Jassy is like, so rehab isn't something that you feel like you need at all? No. People don't feel like they need rehab. They wake up there one day, probably tied to something. Okay? No one just says, hey, you know what I think I feel I need? Rehab. No. You are dragged there by somebody. Okay? Or you're...

You're surrounded by family members with caring looks on their faces for some reason. And it turns out you've been fucking up. And then they put a sack over your head. And then you wake up next to Sandra Bullock for 28 days. I'm pretty sure the lyrics to the song are not, they tried to make me go to rehab. And I said, okay, hold on, let me pack an overnight bag. Can you guys, what are my plans? Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, Luann was on Watch What Happens Live with Stacey. They were very cute. They were an oddly cute couple. And Luann, you know, every question was, well, you know, I'm in a cabaret. I'm a cabaret star. So let me tell you a song that has something to do with this. Liza first sang it to me back when I was just a little babe. But she was on there and she's like, you know, as I sing in my song, in my show, I'm

they tried to make me go to rehab. And I say, yes, yes, yes. Because rehab's a vacation. You just sit around there. Rehab's lovely. You just have you time. I was like, I don't think that you said yes, yes, yes when they sent you to rehab. Are you sure you didn't just go to a spa? I called them a pig and threatened to kill everybody, as I recall. But, you know, things are sure different when you tell them through musicals.

Yeah. So Stacey's like, so you never told him that you wanted to go? And she's like, no.

never and karen goes well let me ask you something karen it's very karen is very open and honest by who she is and what she has going on and karen's like well that doesn't really bother me because i am an advocate for people who if we get sick let's help but let's not go to fundraiser as an honor of them and okay and by the way mia has been to rehab herself by the way i just want to drop that one right in there and they're like what

She's like, yes, yes, yes. She started the joint practice because she had an opioid addiction. She was so high on Oxycontin that she actually went and opened up a chiropractor's office. I mean, that truly is the only thing you do do when you're super high on drugs.

First of all, Karen, this is pretty low, okay, to bring up somebody's opioid addiction. Now, Mia goes so fucking low all the fucking time. I think she's literally in the back Googling right now all the charges so that she can read them while waving her finger around. So she kind of deserved it. But this is really low, bringing shit up like this on camera. But second of all, yeah, I don't understand what Karen is saying.

She was doing so much heroin, and that's why she opened...

a joint chiropractic because really at the end of the day at least it had the word joint in it and it wasn't heroin because she couldn't she couldn't find a business called heroin to open so she just opened something called joint and you know baby steps to recovery is what we call it you know the thing is this poor mia she got so confused she said because she thought she was actually going to get a joint and said she opened a joint and then she just sort of went with it but you know that's what opioid addiction is all about

Unfortunately, the first joint chiropractic was burnt down because Mia tried to smoke it. That was sad. I shouldn't be saying that, should I? Well, payback's a bitch, Mia.

So Kieran just stands up because Kieran just mentions opioid addiction just so casually that Kieran was like, God damn it, Kieran, are you kidding me? Kieran's like, no, I'm not going to sit here and act like that should unravel me when I know my truth. Okay, I care what the final black and white is, which is funny. That is the color of the election sign I ran over on that traffic median. So, you know.

And Stacy's like, I just can't believe this. Oh, what? Oh, what? Opioid addiction? What, Karen? And Karen's like, well, you know, Stacy tells us, she's like, I love Karen, but this is just too much at this point. I mean, now we're just throwing out opioid addiction. Mia may be a lot of things, but we're not going to do that. We are not going to do that. Let's see, Will.

You will. Welcome, Stacey. Welcome to Bravo. Well, you know what? My court date is in two weeks, and I know it's hard for you as my friends, you know, to wait. And Stacey's like, well, it just, it hurt me to hear that about you. Yes, well, you know, look who you're talking to. You're talking to a woman who is sleeping with her boyfriend while her husband is in the house with her. I mean, are you kidding me? No, I'm good. Also, opioid addiction, opioid-induced joint opening. That's what, that's happening there. Yeah.

Customers were saying that they were going into the joint and Mia offered to do surgery and she was taking out discs and then trying to inject them. Karen, that is enough, Karen. She had to go to the hospital for trying to inject herself with spinal cord discs. Karen, I've heard enough.

Mia doesn't want to protect anyone. Mia wants to elevate herself. She'll step on Jesus to stand up. And I take this personally. Payback is a motherfucker.

And so Kieran is like, I love you, Karen. She's like, I love you too, baby. I love you too. Such a long, long road of exposing heroin addiction. I need to lie down. So then Wendy's like, yeah, I feel like for my girls dealing with all this drama, but you know, I'm in a birthday bubble because it's my birthday. So happy birthday to me. Yeah, we know. So then Ashley's FaceTiming Dylan and,

Who is like, bubbles are my favorite. Yeah. And she's like, no, I'm slowly getting used to being a single mom. And like, I'm going out with my friends and I'm traveling and I'm establishing healthy routines for my son, you know? And then we see like her son, her three-year-old son on top of the car, on the car roof in the garage, just flopping around. I was like, is this, what part of this is the healthy routine? You remind me, it's like cut to him, like juggling knives.

Well, you know, we have to get him used to living in the same neighborhood as Karen. So, you know, what do you do when you're on top of a windshield and can't get off, you know? Color. That's what I say. Teach them well and let them lead the way. Also, I love that Ashley's like...

Oh, you know, I'm just kidding. Used to be a single mom. So I'm traveling a lot and I'm going out with my friends. Oh, okay. That sounds like a wonderful version of single motherhood. I haven't heard of that one. You guys, I'm a single mom now. Vacation time. Yeah. Night out with the girls. Party. Single mom. Party.

So then now a bunch of the women are sitting at the pool and Stacey's... They're talking about what they're going to be doing today. Stacey's like, so are we just getting adjustments today? I mean, because I haven't gotten an adjustment in a long time. And, you know, I'm sure they were all dying to make a joke about that. But Karen is like, well, I'm actually... I actually used to support me as businesses. You know, I had a joint membership. And we see flashbacks of...

Karen going to the opening of the joint. I still find this to be so funny. And even on this episode, the way that Mia talks about opening up a chiropractic office is like she acts as if she's opened up an orphanage in a remote country. For real. It's like Oprah's school for girls in Africa. She's like, we're going to open it.

every single time she's literally acting i mean look it's the carburetor offices are helpful you know but like the joint is kind of just like one of those generic businesses that's in a strip mall you know and like it has its utility i've gone several times i i was a joint member i used to be a joint member and then i was like i don't need to i don't need to be on this like

They make you sign up for a monthly thing. I'm like, I'm not going once a month. This is stupid. And the receptionist had bad breath and you have to go in and talk with her. And I was like, oh, I was getting mustard gas in your face every time. I was like, you know what? I don't think I need the joint anymore.

You need a little, you know, Mentos chiropractic, man. So then. The point is that she's acting like she's like really saving the world by opening up like a Jamba Juice or something like that. It's like, no, like, let's just relax. It's like it's a joint chiropractic. So, Karen, we see a flashback to 2021 when supportive Karen was getting her back cracked.

And they were really cracking that thing. I mean, Jesus Christ. It was like, I was like, did somebody pour some rice crisps, some milk over some rice crispies? What the fuck is going on over there? It's like three little guys with dippity-doo hair just started dancing around her, you know? So that's a lot of snap, crackle, and pop in there. And then so- They actually discontinued pop. They discontinued- There was no- Now it's only snap and crackle. Did you hear about that? What happened to pop? He was run over by Karen. It's very sad. Yeah.

But did they really discontinue pop? No. But you set that up beautifully. Thank you. You can't talk to me like that. I'm like, what did you do to get canceled? We're just canceling everybody. You can't even make some of the popping sound on cereal anymore. Well, he should have been at the cereal factory not walking on a traffic meeting in the middle of the night. It's not my fault he was there.

I'm suing him for giving me this problem with the police. You know, it's Pop's problem that I have problems with Popo. You can't... Let me tell you one thing. You can't spell opioid without Pop, sort of. He was high. High as a kite on that median wasn't my fault. In fact, I swerved to avoid him, but then I wanted to pity him instead. It wasn't my fault. It was self-defense. Oh, gosh.

Or the baddies start. So yeah, it's like pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop,

And so she goes into the pool and they're like, oh my God, she's even hotter when she's wet. Was the point of this that she was thinking that she was going to jump into the pool and still be kind of like above the water? Like she thought it was going to be like the shallow end, but it was actually the deep end. So she wound up going all the way underwater. Because everyone was like, oh my God. And they even used this in the trailer, I think. And someone just like plopping into the water. And we were like, oh. And I wonder if that was it. If maybe...

Was that what was going on? I actually didn't get it. I was just going to skip over that because they did do weird things where everybody was horrified. Well, I was wondering if it was like so hard to do your hair later or something. Yes. That's what I was thinking. Yeah, they were all like, oh my God, she jumped in the water. And then Ashley was like, I wanted to play that.

the jaws music i was like that's not the jaws music man she's like she's playing like 76 trombones i was like i don't think you ever saw jaws baby no she's like yeah that's the jaws music because that was scary so i don't know i don't know what happened yeah they did they did like this was a moment okay i'm gonna by the way let me just say something

I have been so thrilled with the season of Potomac so far. It has been so good. This episode was a little slam coming. No, no, no. This was at least a poetry slam. This to me was like, okay, this is one of those episodes where they need to fill it up so that way they can end it. They don't have quite enough content to get to the end of the trip. So they're going to stretch everything out. It's my B's birthday.

And so it's her birthday. But the moment I started to realize that that's what this was going on with this episode was when Jassy went into the pool. And then we had like 45 seconds of like jaws and like the pool, like pool commentary. I was like, oh, they got nothing this episode. Okay, it's one of these episodes. Got it. Yeah.

So they start kind of rehashing different stuff from the day. Like, oh my gosh, she talks on FaceTime the most with their partner. You guys, it might be Stacey. Because Stacey loves to FaceTime with her partner. And then we see clips of that where he's like, hi, hello there, friend and only friend. God, glad you're not here because I am only having to figuratively hold you at arm's length. How's it going over there? And she's like, I just can't wait to see you. I'm so excited to stick my...

to stick your way whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa we're not going there yet right all right i don't know i don't know that i'm ready for that but i should you don't take anything

He was also on Watch What Happens. He was the bartender and he was back there just looking cute as day with a see-through, you know, West Hollywood rave shirt on. He had a see-through shirt on. Yeah, he was wearing, yeah, and it had like a pattern on it of like velvet or something. It was like black velvet and then see-through. And I was like, wow, way to dispel those rumors, sir.

We went in to spell all that. But, you know, Stacy's he's really cute, though. And Stacy is fucking gorgeous. My I saw her. I saw her. And I was like, wow, she's a knockout. But she's definitely like, you know.

Like, if you had never told me she had worked on QVC, I would be like, this person works on QVC. And I don't mean that as an insult. I mean, like, she just is, like, so telegenic and TV ready. And, like, she is just, like, she knows all her angles. She knows the camera and everything. I'm like, wow, this person knows what they're doing on that show. True.

Yeah, that's true. And she's also just so funny. I mean, she was really funny and really charismatic. And I think that her morning show stuff probably pays off here, too, because I guess she's a morning show person. But yeah, she was great. She was really, really funny. And she handled all the questions great. So anyway... By the way, a very good job with newbies this season. I think Stacey has been great. I think, obviously, we have our Bronwyn discussion. And then there's someone else. Oh, Talene on Dubai. Yeah.

Goodbye, Dubai, BTW. We'll talk about it next week. And there were some other newbies. I can't remember, but I just remember feeling like, okay, Bravo is doing a nice job. I think Stacey's great. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappin's commercial.

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So anyway, Stacey is talking about how she's like, you know, the feelings I have for TJ, I miss him when I don't talk to him. We pray together. We talk about our future plans together. We work out together. We don't talk about things together. I just want to introduce him to Arabella one day. And Jazzy's like, that's some real feelings right there. Why? Why? Because she wants to introduce to the daughter one day?

I don't know. It's like basic entry-level things you would want out of a relationship, like having feelings and missing each other. That's some real shit right there. Wait a second. You guys talk? You guys talk about plans? That is a real relationship, right? Yeah, just like super basic stuff. But I guess the thing that bothers me, and it's not really religion because I get it, and I think that people who are religious, of course they would pray together at some point. Right.

But I just feel like that's just not a new dating thing to do. But I guess I've never really met anybody at church. Like, you want to pray together? What are you doing tonight? You want to pray together? No, not really. Can we go to a movie or something? Like, that's the ultimate and cheap dating, you know? You want to get together and pray? No, I can fucking do that on my own, you know? Do you want to get together to poop? That's just like basic maintenance stuff, you know what I mean? I don't need you here, sir. So then Karen is like, and you'll be divorced when?

And Stacey's like, well, you know, I really don't have an answer for that because we have agreed. We have not agreed on all the things we need to agree on. And well, you know, Ashley can tell you about that, right, Ashley? What's going on with you? And Ashley's like, yes, June 11th. And I'm going into mediation. So she's not even getting divorced on June 11th.

It shows that the next phase is starting on June 11th for Ashley after all these years. Yeah. So, and Stacey's like, oh, you have a date? She goes, oh yeah, it's going to be done. I want to have an agreement so I can actually file for divorce one day. Okay. So,

So no one actually is the Robin. She is. She is the Robin of divorce. Like we spent years waiting for Robin and Juan to remarry and then they finally did it. And now we're spending years for Ashley and Michael to unmarry. Yeah. And she does this whole thing where she's like, well, you know, we haven't had to sit down for a very long time, but I'm so excited to start this first step of hopefully many, many, many, many, many, many steps to,

that will begin the pre-section of my divorce from Michael, who I still totally want to fuck, which you can totally tell every time I talk about him that I'm probably still laying the guy. So, can't wait. Yeah.

So, you know, I want to ask Ashley, you've got two beautiful boys. Are they meeting your dates or are they not? She's like, absolutely not. Okay. And are you going to do that after you get a divorce? Are you always going to run them by Michael? And she's like, well, similarly, if he's ever going to have a woman around, we have an agreement that I meet her first. So they're just basically talking about kids and arrangements and honestly nothing that's like.

Yeah. And basically, Stacey's like, wow, you know, I didn't even think about that. You know, I didn't even think about that part that, you know, you have to get permission from each other to date. And.

And Karen is like, yeah, that's so much pressure. And Karen's like, well, I'll just give you what I did. I wanted to make sure that I was engaged first. All right. That's what I did. And Karen is saying, yeah, well, Karen's old school. You know, I mean, you know, Mary is like, you know, driving yourself instead of calling an Uber. There's just so many ways. Yeah.

Very old school. She's, Karen's basically like, you know, I'm currently in a relationship with someone who has children and, you know, and this way, like,

He gets to see – she's basically saying the perks of – or the benefit of meeting the kids first is that he gets to see how his kids interact with her rather than like waiting until you get engaged to meet them and everything. And she talks about how when it comes to Greg and his kids, that their comfort and their happiness is just always – she's always going to support that. Whether it means doing a movie night or cooking or anything like that, she's just going to be like –

like the rich auntie in the house. So Jassy is like, well, yeah, you know, I'm in a situation where my significant other has children and it can be really tricky. You know, I mean, I would say that once you knew that engagement was right around the corner and then we see a clip of her looking at rings with Darius, she's like, that would be a more clever time. Like they're all trying to give Stacy advice, but they're all in wrecks of relationships. So,

So Stacey's like, you're literally all what I'm trying to avoid. Especially Jazzy, which we find out as the episode goes on. I mean, Jazzy, girl, no advice needed. Thank you. This was great. I was so happy to find out that Jazzy has this super messy situation. And I'm going to go out on a limb and say the reason why Jazzy was not a...

did not get chosen to be a real housewife is that this background situation is so messy and i'm going to predict that as the woman grill her on it she's going to pull away because she's going to say like hmm do i want to be with an nfl player or do i want to be on this show i'm going to choose the nfl player that's my prediction i thought she was also on the show um

Well, maybe it's just a rumor, but I think there's another show coming out about the Kansas City Chiefs' wives. Oh, yeah, there is. And I think she's on that. So I think this is just like introducing us to her and then she's on something else. I think. Got it.

Maybe. So, Karen's like, well, whatever leaves your ultimate happiness, I say go for it. You know, with children being a priority. Children are the priority, are they not, girls? I mean, I remember Raven, Raven, little tiny Ray, little Ray face looking out at me. I would just say, Ray! I was back before I knew chickens were dirty birds. I forgot what we were talking about. Children. Right. Bored with them. I'm so glad she's gone. Sorry.

What was that? You were saying children are the most important thing. Children are the most important thing. Tell your children who you're fucking. That's my advice. Karen, are you okay?

I'm sorry I may be high off of the opioid fumes coming out of Mia's room. So speaking of which, Jacqueline emerges and she sits down and Wendy, and then Wendy comes out and she's really proud of her leg muscles and she's showing up on her legs and everything. And then now finally Mia joins them and she's like, special memory, this memory, Wendy. Oh, is it a pile of oxy-gutton, you drug addict?

Karen, what was that even about? So Wendy's like, oh, this came for me? Awesome. This is from Eddie Carter Cruz and the dog Zoe. Wait, the daughter? Didn't Cameron contribute to this gift? Cameron's like, I stand in defiance of my mother. Yeah, she's like, I'm not sending that woman shit, okay?

So Stacey's like, well, Wendy, are we going to see that body in this pool? Show me how to model. So Wendy starts strutting around and everything. And they're like, oh, whatever. And then they all start dancing. And then they all start making fun of Stacey because she's a really stiff dancer. This is a godsend for Giselle. Because Giselle was, for the longest time, really up until this season, the worst dancer in this group. And now they've got Stacey. So...

At least as you know, she's doing, I think maybe the jitterbug, I think is what she's doing, but it's still better than Giselle.

Stacey is doing that medieval Shakespearean love dance where you put your hand against each other and you sort of go around in a circle with your partner. I'm expecting her to like curtsy and then find a new partner and slowly. Yeah, Stacey's dance will get her into heaven for sure. She's like, I don't drop it like it's hot. I don't shake that thing. I just move, you know, the way that the music tells me.

I just, I just, you know, all the... Stacey, you're just doing a sign of the cross. Wow.

Still, I'm just hoping it'll get me laid, let's be honest. TJ and I just don't believe in dancing. He often says that John Lithgow is the real hero of Dirty Dancing. I mean, Footloose. You won't even watch Dirty Dancing. So they're like, oh my god, please, just stop, Stacy. Please, Stacy, just stop. It hurts to watch you, you know? So they dance a little bit. And then, of course, one...

wendy is sitting there clapping her ass in someone's face no it was uh mia mia was yes mia was twerking on karen's face and karen is like okay get your ass off me i'm not gonna okay i'm not over your ass because i'm oh i'm good i'm choking on my own karen impersonation i think i have to speak like a normal person she's like i'm not over your ass because i'm gonna be on your ass in a minute

So then Giselle comes. Her version was better. She said it was funnier. We just hear birds. Birds start squawking and flying out of trees. And then all the leaves fall off of the trees. And cats start losing all their hair. And Giselle's like, I'm back. So Giselle comes back. Because, guys, I left for less than 24 hours. Because my children had an event.

They graduated. It was sad. I cried. They're so big now. They're huge. And they graduated. I'm a mother, a mother who let her, I was like, oh my God, please, please stop her. Stop this monologue. I can't take anymore. Between you and Wendy with it's her birthday. Enough. Taylor, I'm wrong enough.

I literally still do not understand the timeline here. Like, I just refuse to accept it. Like, at this point, it's got to be like 11 a.m. or noon or I don't know. Like, based on where they go and what they do, I just, how far is it to fly from Potomac to Lake Norman? I'm going to look up right now. I'm going to look it up. It's driving me absolutely nuts. It is, okay, to drive, it's a six-hour drive. So flight, I don't even know how you can't get flight information. Okay, fine.

I just, I don't know. I just feel like something is up. I feel like there was like a day we didn't see personally. Well, I can't believe that they would cut it. I mean, from watching everything they're doing, they are twerking. I mean, what, what, what could they possibly have cut?

So then Giselle's like, well, so was it fun? Because she sees Jesse sitting in the kitchen. Jesse's doing her makeup. But then we get the best taste of Jesse that we've had so far. She's like, so how was everything? And Jesse's like, I mean, it was fun if you weren't in it. She goes, what does that mean? She's like, baby...

we've got people that are basing their business off an ex dealing drug money. And I mean, it's just, it's, it's been a lot. She's loving it. And she goes, whose business was funded by drug dealers? And she's like, okay. And Ashley was asking about case scar. And if she actually had a scar, something like that. And she's like, she clearly has you. She has a visible scar. She's like, well, that's what I said. I said, do you have glasses? And then Ashley said, no, she doesn't have glasses. So that's what's been going on.

She was so funny in this scene. She was like, well, what did you do, Jassy? She goes, well, I listened and I was like, okay. She goes, well, is this last night or is this morning? Do we need a nap? She was like, oh, that was breakfast. That was the breakfast conversation. She goes, oh, so is everybody mad right now? She goes, well, I wouldn't

Call them mad. She's like, well, who should I check on right now? She's like, well, no, look, they serve this food, so everything is all good. So then everyone starts to come up to the... Everyone starts filtering up to this room, to this dining room, and saying hello, hello, hello, and everything. And everyone's saying hi, and...

And Giselle's like, well, clearly all hell broke loose. Everybody should be exhausted from the shade and the screaming of it all. Like, let's just have a nice day. Can we do that?

So, they're like, oh, Giselle's back. Yay. And Jacqueline's like, these ladies don't know how to act when you're gone. It's like you're one of the only ones who realizes I'm a badass bitch and I'm here to stay. I'm Jacqueline. And no one's taking Jacqueline down. Am I right, girls? No one's paying attention to Jacqueline. Okay. Yes. Like, this is Jacqueline. Jacqueline is really trying to stake her claim.

So now they're all... Mia's like, okay, everyone, let's do shots. So she serves tequila shots. She's pouring tequila shots into people's mouths and everything. She pours some vodka into Stacy. Stacy's like, do I have to swallow what TJ says? It's a sin. They're like, no, swallow! So then Mia takes this Casamigos bottle, and when we say that she inserts it into her mouth, I mean...

This lady could have a side career as a sword swallower because that thing goes deep. First of all, also, that's a communal bottle, so why are you sticking so much of it into your mouth right now? She deep-throated the bottle, and then she swung her head back and took it down her lungs. I don't know. And then she was like, yeah, ladies. And so they all start making deep-throat jokes, of course. She's like, that's how you keep tuning in, ladies. Oh, man.

So then, uh, laughing. So I'll just basically admitted that she's fucking both of those guys, you know, at the same time. Right. She's always like me. Yeah. You just solidified what we've all been thinking. So they're like, wow. Stacy's like, that is a special skill that most women don't have. And if I wanted to gain that skill, I know TJ would not be where I'd be practicing. Yeah.

Okay, so then now Wendy and Giselle are talking and she's like, you know, yesterday I walked out on Stacey on the balcony and she was like twirling her hair while she talked to the guy. And Giselle's like, so do we know this TJ person? And she goes, what do you mean do you know him? You can go. They're in the car now. She's like, Google him if you want to. She goes, I'm going to.

And she's like, oh, he's an actor. He's a walk-on actor. She goes, oh, an actor? She goes, yeah, Thomas Anthony Jones. So she goes to a working actor. She said he's a working actor, right?

I think she's like, oh, that makes me proud to brag. Like, yes, he is an actor because there's definitely like some thirst going on with this couple. Like last week when TJ was like, did you tell them about us? You want you want to tell them you want to share about me? You want to share? You want to talk? Make a storyline. Come on. So she's like, yes, he's a working actor. Everyone look at his IMDb. It's actually really impressive. So they do. Of course, they look that IMDb right up.

And she's like, yeah, well, okay, well, this is just the back of his head. So we see the IMDb, and it's like, days of our lives, Dr. Jim McGonigal. And Stacey's like, oh, yeah, he's been on so many things. NCIS, ER. At one point, she goes, he's been on so many things. ER?

And then she just paused. I was like, honey, ER has not been on the air for 20 years. Come on. So Wendy's like, so he does like extra work? She goes, no, babe, not extra. Meanwhile, all the crowds are like, one episode, one episode, one episode. Which, hey, that is good. That is the dream for the actor. But we're like, let's not talk about him like he is the second coming of, you know, Richard Grieco. Yeah.

Work is work, you know what I mean? And so Giselle's like, so when are you going to see him if he's in LA? And she's like, well, he's going to come in this week. It's really important. He just tries to come in every other week or so to make sure that I'm okay. He comes in so we can make sure we're not coming. So

So Giselle's like, so are you guys going to have sex? She's like, no, no, no. We haven't actually had sex. And Giselle's like, damn. But who said they didn't want to have sex? She's like, we. We both decided we don't want to have sex. And any time we start to get horny, we just sit down and watch chicken run until the feeling passes.

I mean, it's like she hasn't had sex because she's so stiff. Okay. Have you felt around? You need to know what you're working with. What if it's like a thumb? She goes, what if what's like a thumb? You know.

His thumb? His thumb is very much like a thumb. I do really want to know. Wait, did I just say that? Go on. His thumb is very thumby. It's on the nose, although his thumb is not usually on his actual nose. His nose is also on the nose. I would say that everything is exactly the way it should be.

Elbows and elbow. Unless I catch his nose, which turns into my thumb. I go, I caught your nose. Turns into my thumb. I'm like, your nose is a thumb right now. But then I put it back on his nose and that's not a thumb anymore. That was our first fight. Our first fight was when I stole his nose. He accused me of doing witchcraft and said that was paganism.

And I had to explain to him it was actually just a very common thing that people do. And he still said, you're a heathen. And then, you know, we got through it eventually when I said I could put him on TV. He actually tried to have me burned, which is crazy. And they said the new administration hasn't taken office yet. Yeah.

But give it time. Yeah. That being said, we did do particularly well on QVC when we sold some steaks that you can burn people at. I was like, my boyfriend tried to burn me at this steak and it was a wonderful experience. I think we sold out of that lot. Yeah.

He said, the stakes are high. I said, no, that's probably Mia. But if she is, she's going to be on one of these stakes. So it all just kind of worked out. And then she deep-throated the stake. It all was full circle. Can't crucify this bitch. That's why I got fired from QVC, because it happened live on the air and everyone was horrified.

So Giselle's like, so have you sexually assaulted him and felt around? She goes, I would like to, but well, can you do oral? And she's like, I don't know that he's really willing to do oral. You know, this is just very difficult, but you can direct your attention to other things. The Bible, brain, going to the zoo. Where did that come from? She's like, yeah, prayer. I'm horny. Let's go to the zoo. Going to the zoo.

And then she couldn't think of anything else. That's it. She's like, hey, that lady's at the zoo again. Is there something weird? Should we have her followed? What is she doing here again? Who is that lady doing flash dance next to the tiger cage? So I just want to hang her in a chair.

So Wendy's like, how old is he? He's in his 40s. 41. And, you know, he has been waiting for a wife all this time. And Giselle just starts cracking up because she's like, oh, no. Yeah. She does the whole, you better drive the car first thing. And Wendy's like, I'm just getting to know Stacey. And I don't want to doubt her, but it's odd.

It's, it's, it's a little, yeah, there's something fishy about this. I'm not believing it because it's not the whole religious thing because he's fucked plenty of people. She's already said that on the show. It's like he's reclaimed when a man is reclaiming his virginity, right? When he starts dating you, there is an ulterior motives period. I'm sorry. And he still hasn't fucked her. It's been years. I mean, if it really was religious, he would say, then let's get married and then we can fuck.

But this whole like, oh, it's just religious. No, you don't reclaim your your virginity like that at 40. Give me a fucking break. No. Here comes one right now.

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So now they arrive at the joint. And I have to give a shout out to our note taker, Jessica, who writes, they arrive at the joint with an exclamation point. Jessica's very excited about this. And you know what? I am too. Because we were back at the joint. And everyone's like, oh, wow.

Well, we're at the joint. And Giselle's like, why are we going? Mia's like, well, I just want to show you guys where I started. So they walk in to this random joint chiropractic. And Mia literally goes, I'm here. I don't know you. Of course you don't know her. Because you haven't owned this joint in years. What are you doing walking in? This is a high school graduation. The chiropractor's like, uh. These people, all they know...

Is that they got a call from Bravo that was like, hey, we want to shoot a scene from the real Housewives of Potomac at your joint chiropractic. Is that okay? They're like, okay. I don't know why, but sure. Okay, fine. So she's like, yeah, I don't know you. And the guy's like, well, hi. I'm Dr. Chad. She goes, oh, well, nice to meet you. Oh, my boyfriend actually played a Dr. Chad one time.

Yeah, on St. Elmo's Fire. Have you ever heard of that? It was a failed pilot, a spinoff of the movie. Yeah, didn't really take off.

Here's an extra. I'm Dr. Chad. Nice to... Welcome to the joint, okay? It's like, well, we're actually selling all of our joints. We had 97 joints, and we're selling them because the business partners couldn't get along, which is mostly Gordon's fault. And, you know, this is where it started, guys. This is the first place I ever cracked a bet. Are you one of the doctors?

I am a doctor. I'm a doctor. Yes, I am a doctor. No, you're not. What are you doing? Do you think Mia even had anything to do with this joint chiropractic? I don't, there's no point. But again, she really is acting like owning a joint chiropractic.

is like i don't know owning a factory somewhere i don't know like i just it's just like it's just like you're just a nameless franchise owner and she's like yeah this is where we are and this is sort of like my stomping ground by the way is dr mcdaddy is is he here or where's dr mcdaddy and dr chad is like oh um

You had to go up to Virginia? I was told I had to come up with an excuse. Because, like, you know, Dr. McDaddy doesn't exist. He doesn't exist because Dr. Chatterjee is just like, go along with the delusional lady, you know? This lady is with the lady who's always at the zoo, you know? She's got to be crazy. So just go along. He's like, Dr. McDaddy.

So Mia's like, yeah, I no longer own this location, but this one was one of my original babies. I still have 22 other locations that I'm going to be selling soon for concrete. I don't know. Her talking about the joint being one of her babies reminds me of What's-Her-Face being like, like, Donkey B. I'm like, please. It's just a joint. Yeah.

And they're all just standing there in the lobby. It's like cricket sounds. And they're all just looking at each other like, okay. There's no tour of the office. There's none of that. It's just like, well, this is where it all started, ladies. Stripping taught me something. Oh, yeah. We're not. We're not. We have hundreds of businesses. And Giselle goes, so...

is this your busy time? Because there's nobody in there, you know? And nobody comes in the whole time of the tournament. It's acting like they're on, like, a tour of, like, a GM plant. Like, this is... It's like we're at the Guinness... We're at the Guinness...

Guinness tour again. Like, this is where Guinness beer started. A global sensation. Like, well, ladies, we are here. This is the joint care of Rantic. This is where it all began. One of 13 franchises that we bought. Just soak it all in. So Wendy is just like, this is not a good birthday thing. It's my birthday. So now they go to lunch. They don't even get adjustments, right? They don't even get their backs cracked. Nope.

No, they just stand in the lobby for a minute and then decide to go to lunch. So they go to lunch and everyone gets a round of shots and Karen's like, oh, I'll have a coffee, please. I'll have a coffee. I'll have that with cream and vermouth and vodka. But please don't put any coffee or cream in that. Thank you very much. Would you like any soda pop? Oh, flashback.

So then... I got it. Pop is still dead somewhere. The end of this episode is going to be like, in loving memory of Pop.

So they order. And then Giselle's like, well, I came and I got downloaded on the T from Jassy. So I want to make sure. Kierna, are you okay? Yeah. I didn't like hearing that you were crying, you know, and all that. And she's like, I was very upset, Ashley. I was very, very upset. And she's like, Ashley, would you like to apologize? I'm just reopening a wound because it's fun for me. I could talk about my children going to college. Would anybody prefer that? It's like, no, no. Okay, fine. We'll do this. We'll do this.

But it's my birthday. We know, Wendy. Again, I'm confused at how Giselle went to a graduation ceremony, had a graduation reception, and then was able to get back to Lake Norman before lunchtime on The Real Housewives of Potomac. This is really bothering me.

So my only explanation is that the reception that Giselle and Jamal held for their daughters happened on a future date and they just edited it earlier. That's the only way this makes sense to me. And I know this is a point that I think negative three people care about, but it's on my mind. And this is a forum for honesty and transparency. All right. Well, I hope that you one day get that figured out. Thank you.

thank you thank you so um they uh kieran is like uh so kieran is like you know

Ashley says, well, I already said I'm sorry. And Kiernan's like, well, that was just piggybacking off Mia, in my opinion. And I was very offended, though, when you, of all people, dragging drug dealer. And Mia goes, why is it me, of all people? She goes, because you have a very colorful past yourself. She goes, I'm a colorful past not in the drug industry. And she's like, well, strippers, drug dealers, I think they're kind of close. She goes, I'm not.

That's not the same thing, baby. It's legal, illegal, okay? She goes, well, I never sold drugs, but it was obviously very pressing for you to bring it up. And she's like, well, when you're a drug dealer, honey, it's kind of illegal. Being a stripper is not illegal. She goes, okay, well, selling us is fine.

Jacqueline's like, not selling ass is fine. That's a prostitute and I am here to stay. And Mia's like, well, I called you on your shit and you didn't deny it. So, you know, it's a fact. She goes, okay, okay, okay. So what's my current man doing? And she goes like, I just, I was like, okay, we're going to move on. Okay. I didn't realize how annoying this fight actually was. I shouldn't have reopened it. It was like, it was like, look at that security while you're posted on the corner. Mind that business.

so all right so like my man's my man's got a real job now so yeah and then mia goes oh yeah a quote-unquote social worker okay okay what does that mean is social worker code for something bad

but also like, I think she's just like dismissing it. Like, like, Oh, that's real impressive. He's a social worker. Wow. And you call yourself glamorous says the woman who just gave him a tour of the first joint chiropractic she ever opened up. Yeah.

So Jassy's like, guys, I have an event. My man is being honored. And every year the Super Bowl winning team gets to go to the White House. And I'm putting together a party. And I've made a huge point to invite all of the single men. And we don't know if these single men will be from the Kansas City Chiefs, but I'm just going to suggest that they will. I mean, watch it just be like random people like around the block. There

They're all going to show up thinking that they're going to be attached to a football player and then get to meet Taylor Swift. And it's just going to be some randos from Jassy's life. So Jacqueline's like, oh, well, I want to come because I'm like in my whole workout mode now. I've literally lost 15 pounds from last year, which is why I'm basically running this show now. Am I right, girls? Yeah.

It just makes me feel strong. Like, don't fuck with me. Potentially Karen, who might be listening to this right now. Giselle's like, oh, are you saying that to Karen? Because I heard there was a lot. Do you guys want to fight again? Because I missed it. And Karen's like, no. I'm so busy dodging dots. I'm like this. Bing, bing.

I'm like a pedestrian in the 70s watching near a Dodge dealership, avoiding dots. Did that make sense to anyone? You're too young to understand that. Remember, she's like Wonder Woman. Do you remember that show? Just dodging things and she had underwear that were made out of metal. I used to think, God, how does anybody get into those underwear? It'd be really nice if she figured that out and would let us know. Sat there in the audience just watching that the other day.

God, someone get my underwear off of me, please. It feels like metal. I've just put... Bing, bing, bing. That's right, Stacey. Keep reflecting. What I would give to have an invisible car.

Darren, Karen could get out that DUI. What? I wasn't driving. I'm just merely walking, and by walking, slightly floating above the asphalt. It would be another charge. It would be like reckless endangerment, driving an invisible car. Shame. Shame on you. Drunk. Drunkenly. It's not invisible. It's Belvedere colored. It was Wonder Woman who had the invisible car, right? She had an invisible plane. Oh. What's the point of that?

invisible car. I mean, cause she could fly country to country or she could, you know, take on monsters and they wouldn't see her coming and stuff. And invisible cars, way worse. People just talk about that. Terrible concept. Yeah. That's a terrible, terrible concept.

Terrible thing to do. So then Jacqueline's... She'd get rid of it all the time. Let me tell you something. She would have permanent whiplash. And Jacqueline's like, well, I feel like there's a lot of ass kissing around here today. Okay. And now they're getting back in the sprinters. And Giselle's like, well, I thought we were going to dinner tonight. And they are. They're going to Charlotte's Finest Rooftop Fahrenheit. That's such a stupid name. Why were you...

Everything's like abusing me this time around. When I watched the episode, I was like, this episode is boring. But now as we go through it, everything is cracking me up. I love that someone was like, let's build a rooftop bar in Charlotte and we'll call it Fahrenheit because it has height in the name.

And the Farron, we don't know what that has to do with anything, but it just seems fun. Let's go with it. People are like, it's really hot up here. I'm sorry, but it's called Fahrenheit. Sorry, you're really going to complain. I'm sorry, Americans only. If you have the metric system, you have to go to Celsius next week. No kidding. Good luck. Oh my God. All those people who don't believe that 32 degrees is freezing.

Okay, so now they're getting ready for dinner and Eddie and Wendy talk. We get to see Zoe the puppy. Very cute. And then Jazzy FaceTimes with her boyfriend and we can't really clear him. He just sounds depressed. She's like, hi, baby. How are you? He's like, it's okay, baby. So she can't hear him very well.

And so she says, you know, just like last year, he doesn't have a contract. And he doesn't know what team he's going to play for. You know, it's like being fired. It's like Jacqueline, you know? And I really want to be available for him to talk if needed. But the signal's just so horrible. The calls are not going through, baby. So this is a bad relationship. Because if you're freaking out that you can't talk because the signal is bad,

That is the sign of a shaky-ass foundation. Didn't we see this somewhere else? Where did we see this where someone couldn't talk to the... Couldn't, like, speak to the person that they needed to speak to because the reception was bad and it caused, like, a meltdown? Well, because it just... It was obviously not the reception, but they just kept using that over and over. It's like they were the only person... Wasn't it on the Valley? They were, like, the only person that... Sorry, but the reception was bad. I just...

Yeah, I was like, I need to get the good reception. Otherwise, it's going to be... Oh, no, it was...

Was it Southern charm? I don't know. Don't do this to me. So then, um, now they're just talking about the day and stuff. And Giselle and Ashley are gossiping about the girl, the girls. And then Ashley was like, yeah, you know, the K and me, I think that did kind of catch me off guard. Uh, you know, just going at it about the scar. And she's like, so do you want me to tell you my good news? And she goes, sure. She goes, okay, well, you know how I'm working on healing and thriving.

And then we get a flashback to Ashley singing everybody her Healing and Thriving song. I think this is over. Healing and thriving, now I'm just surviving. Surviving. You're having cream cheese with chai, sing. Healing and thriving, and life's not drunk or thriving. Okay, that's enough, Ashley. We've changed all the lyrics to be about my running with the coppers.

So healing and thriving. Listen, music isn't something that should take you 20 years to adjust to get it ready for the public. We heard it. We don't need to hear it anymore. Okay. You're not going to do something to it that's going to make it suddenly pop off the charts. Okay. It's over. Healing and thriving is over. But I put an EDM beat to it. So now it's like healing and thriving.

And now, and Giselle's like, oh God, why did I start a leggings company with this idiot? And she makes Giselle listen to it. And Giselle's like, oh, so idiom doesn't mean, because it's not that at all. And now she's like, well, it just means like girl power, you know? So now it's like girl power. Okay. That's enough. I don't need you to sing this apart live. And it's just, well,

Also, Healing and Thriving with an EDM beat. I think that song already exists. It's called Rhythm is a Dancer. Okay, let's not act like you came up with that melody. It's called Rhythm is a Dancer. Just listen.

Just listen and you'll see. So she's finding herself because these past couple of months have been totally different. Instead of pretending to be married to Michael and doing whatever she wants, she's been pretending to be married to Michael and doing whatever she wants. It's been really hard, guys. So now she's going to put her song to an EDM beat. And it changed. It's life changing.

Yeah, she has really leaned into what brings her joy and happiness, as opposed to all those other seasons where she was, you know, working in corporate America. So upset with her day to day nine to five job that she famously had season after season after season, just, you know, pushing paper around, going to meetings, doing big things as opposed to, you know, I don't know, doing yoga. I don't know.

Doing more yoga, TikTok dances. I'm glad that she's finally leaning into what brings her happiness now. So now the girls are all gathering to go out. And Mia's like, everyone, eight minutes. And Jacqueline says, oh my God, somebody stinks. It's like stink pussy or something, right? Season three on its way. They're all checking.

Jacqueline smells Mia's crotch. She's like, it wasn't you. And even if it was you, I would never say so on TV because I am here to stay and I am not your sidekick, but I'll do whatever you need. So then they're just like laughing about the smell and like, you know, girl code, got to make sure my girls not smell like fish up in here. So then Karen's wearing like a small dress. Everyone's like, wow. She's like, I look like a hooker about to breastfeed.

So anyway, they get in the sprinter van. Didn't really get that. So then they get in a sprinter van and they get some housewives craziness going on. They decided to do something that we have never seen on these shows. And it's actually a nice breath of fresh air. They paid very much, very much, very fuck kill. So who would you like to take a ferry with? Who would you fuck? And who would you kill? Yeah.

And this went on for about 25 minutes. It just went on and on and on. On and on. It was like listening to Ashley singing Happiness and Thriving. So then they go to the restaurant, Fahrenheit. And Wendy's like, go ahead.

It's my birthday, and I'm going to remember this birthday forever. And Karen's like, this was a good one. This was a good one. I mean, it was a lot better than my 2020-20-22-2555-444. I was basically just giving out phone numbers at this point. Am I right? Carry the one. So then Wendy is like, you know, I usually just celebrate this birthday with Eddie.

And in adulthood, I have not done a celebration where I've invited outside people, mainly because I also live two hours away from the rest of the cast. But what I also realized is I never felt like people would celebrate me. And everyone's like, oh, Wendy, why? Not you? Come on, Wendy. She's like, no, it's funny because you all met me when I was 35. And when you all met me, I just had a baby and I was so unsure of myself.

Roll the footage of me being so unsure of myself and sad and me at 35. Never happened. I am a doctor. I've got four degrees. Wendy literally gives another speech. Okay. I'm so sick of Wendy giving speeches. I love Wendy. I think Wendy's having a great season, but goddamn.

So she gives another big, long speech about how she's been through so much and, you know, all her businesses and all of her this and all of her that. And then Ashley's like, you know what? This is where they all start giving speeches back to her. Ashley's like, you inspire me so much to be just like you, the way you are.

I don't know, quit your job, quit the other job, quit the other job, and then quit that other job. It's really inspiring, Wendy. Wendy's like, thank you so much, Ashley. Thank you. Thank you so much.

Okay, birthday girl, it's my turn. I love where we are, specifically at Fahrenheit, looking at the beautiful buildings of Charlotte, but also in our relationship. It's been stale for some time, and now it's rich, and I'm here for all of it, whatever it actually is, and I'm glad that we've been able to save our jobs by pretending to enjoy each other. So then they joke about the vagina, flapping vaginas at each other.

And Jacqueline's like, oh, so that did happen, huh? And Wendy's like, no, vaginas were not touched.

Stacy says, wow, there's not a lot of women that I admire, Wendy. And I just have to say, I admire you. I love what you've been doing with your fries. They're crispier than usual. And that took some time getting used to. But they're delicious. And you can never go wrong with a Frosty. Am I right, ladies? Jassy goes, I think that you're brilliant, creative, creative.

altruistic and inspiring. And Giselle's like, what's altruistic? What's going on? Where's the altruism coming from? And now she's, oh no, she actually asked what does that mean? And now she goes, oh, it means that you give up, you keep others without expecting anything in return. And Giselle's like, uh, uh, okay. And Jassy goes, I had expectations when I met not only the group, but you as well. And you did supersede those expectations, Wendy. You were a big superseder.

And put his super seeds. What is that? Is that like when you get a lot of seeds at the garden store? So then Karen's like, you are a wonderment. Yeah, I've said it. Said it. Now that's not a word, right? No, that's not. I don't think so, Giselle. But it is fun to keep you on your toes, Giselle.

You are a wonderment in how you take on so many challenges in your life and only do them a little bit before you move on to something else. That is a true wonderment. And you succeed in not succeeding. You're a sample of bladder of half-baked job ideas. Congratulations. I love that about you. You've been there for me. You've been there for me when I've been falsely accused by a traffic median of driving over it. So thank you for being a good friend.

So then Kierna is like, I just hope God continues to shine his light on you and just keep doing what you're doing because you've always been the glue for everything that I've been through. And for that, I love you. So did Kierna come on as Wendy's friend? I don't remember that. I don't know what that... Well, you know, I guess... What does that mean? Are they really close in real life? Wendy...

Well, Wendy was, remember, Wendy was Team Candice, and so she was really, like, she took Kieran aside with the whole fight and everything, so maybe that's what that's about. So then Jacqueline is like, initially when I met Wendy, it was very rocky, because she was basically looking at me like, who are

are you okay but there's definitely more warmth in you as opposed to bitch why are you here and as you can see i am here to say i'm not just a fly-by-night girl i basically am going to be a real housewife i'm already like ready to start my iconic fourth season so um i don't know what your attitude was about because clearly i'm america's favorite in conclusion wendy sucks okay happy birthday

So now they toast to Wendy again. And then Ashley's like, well, cheers also to Stacey opening up and giving us her man government name who has an IMDB. And Stacey's like, oh, I just feel like there's been so much focus on me when we haven't talked about Jassy's man. Jassy, let's talk about your man. That sounds fun. Like, you are so shady. You make it sound like you're being so sweet and she's just handing this girl over to the wolves.

Yes. So Jassy is like, oh, well, see what happens when you give children liquor. Okay, I guess we're going to direct the shade at me. Anyway, I am so thankful that you did ask about Darius, who does fuck me. Well, he's been the best thing that ever happened to me. And he is someone that I'm going to marry. And we've had some bumps in the road. The bumps are ages three and five. And we've gone through those bumps. And, you know, he's a great father to two boys who were born within a range of, you know,

one month to three years ago. And, you know, like they were either there or they were already created before me. And the children are three and turned one a month ago. I'm like, wait a minute. What? And she goes, yes. Well, so we were dating, but it wasn't really official. But then he had impregnated somebody. I'm like, oh,

So he was cheating on you? No, we weren't official. So, okay. So you're putting up with a man and constantly cheating on you and having babies with other people because he's rich. Okay. Got you. Is it possible it went the other way around? Like he was cheating...

He was cheating on the baby mama with Jassy. I feel like that could be a possibility. Yeah, she was like the other woman or something. She's the other woman. Yeah, scandalous. But basically, you know, he's famous and he's rich. So he's going to get away with that. And they're like, oh, yeah, yeah. That's what it's like when you date a sports guy. Yeah, it's just how it is. You know, they're like, I've done it. Who said that they did it?

Mia. Well, because of Jassy. A couple years ago, when he and I were dating, she was maybe two or three months pregnant. So she was already pregnant before we even had sex. And he did not know. And that was the delay in me knowing. And they're like,

Oh, uh-huh. Okay. And so Ashley actually does successful math. She goes, so you've been together two years. The baby is one year old, the first baby. The gestation for a baby is nine months. So they had to have been dating for three months prior to him conceiving the second baby. Another six months, she finds out about the baby. So two plus two is not equaling four here.

Yeah. And, oh, Kieran is the one who's like, oh yeah, I've seen this. I've been through this because I dated the one who was in the league and, you know, he had two women pregnant at the same time and they happened to be twins, you know, and I dreamt about it. And then I saw the woman in my dreams and they're like, wait a minute, two sets of twins. I was like, no, don't interrupt her. I love her. Like a dream, a dream. He was having babies with multiple people, twins even. And then it turns out he was having twins with multiple people.

Like, I need to know this side of her. And they just like totally shoved it under the rug. I know. She's like, they were twins. It happened to be that they were twins. And then they were switched at birth. So then one set went up to New York City. One stayed in Jupiter Hollow. But then the one set in New York City, they had to actually buy the hospital from Jupiter Hollow. And so then later on in life, the ones from Jupiter Hollow had to go to New York. Like, Kieran, I think it was not a dream. I think you just watched big business.

So then Karen is like, yeah, so it was two people pregnant at the same time. That's all I'm going to say. And for me, I couldn't do that. I just couldn't get past it.

Which pregnancy did it for you? The first or the second? How many kids were here before Kierna was like, I'm out of here? Kierna has dated and had a very interesting dating life. My God. She's dated an NFL guy who's had two sets of twins with two different women while he was dating her and a drug dealer. Girl, what app are you on? It sounds like a fun one.

Mia's like, can you tell me what team he played for? He was straight. No, I mean like actual team. Oh, just leave me alone, Mia. She goes, no, tell me because like what team you play for. Because like that sounds really fucking familiar. I say that because the same thing happened to me. So I'm just trying to make sure it's not the same guy. Is it the Ravens? And everyone's like, oh, not the Ravens. And Keno's like, no, he played for Jesus at this point. And bottom line is if you date any form of a successful man, you should be prepared for

uh, prepared. And it just, I was like, even if he's not successful. Yeah. You should be prepared. I met, I met a pre I did. I was married to a preacher and he was still pulling this shit. Okay. Uh, he just impregnated a, like very young parishioner, like two years ago. So I get it. Okay. Yeah. At least yours caught balls. Okay. Mine just catches confessions. Yeah.

So Ashley is like, you know what? We support Jassy. This is not a conventional relationship. But I think it's true. We're learning that not a one size fits all for everybody, which is my way of saying you can stop giving me shit about Michael Darby because you all are in relationships. Yeah, exactly.

So then Giselle's like, oh, that just means he was cheating on you, girl. It's okay. Just say that. He cheated on you and you still want to be with him. Just say that. I had a dating Jamal storyline just last year. We've all been there. So Stacey's like, I would like to make a toast.

Well, to toast, really, because isn't it wonderful? No one really thinks toast enough, but it's really always there for me. Also, Ashley Darby, who's married to a man who looked like toast. Ashley, you are just so inspiring. The way that you are so upfront and honest about everything makes me want to be as upfront and honest about everything as you are, which is why I'm not telling any of you bitches anything. Thank you.

you know, thank you're giving me the courage to be a little bit more open about talking about my life. And I'm a little bit more open. And then I'm a little bit more closed. I actually opened the door a little bit. I peeked in, I saw what was going on in the room and I just closed it. So that was fun. You guys got all you need. So then they chose to her. And, um, you know, Stacy is like thinking about how being a single mother and all that entails, you know, she'd be crazy not to ask these women who've had so many different life experiences, how they've made it.

so then food more food arrives they all have fun they all go back home i'm gonna go back and jackie tried to be funny she's like oh my god stink ass pussy am i right and they just look at her and now she's like yeah we need to go back and then you guys need to shower because some of you guys really stink it's a good one right they just all look at her like shut the fuck up man who is this

Can someone please let the staff at Fahrenheit know that when I said I'm here to stay, I didn't mean the actual restaurant. Okay, I know I'm going to break some hearts. That's what they call me, a heartbreaker. I am here to stay, though. So everybody's leaving, and they're kind of bored at this point because it's been kind of boring. So they're getting up, they're grumble, grumble. And then Wendy goes, hey, but guess what? Not only am I 40, I got four degrees. And then she does that cackle, and everyone's like, oh, God, shut up.

please just shut up so they leave and then uh we wake up and wendy is just like boom like she just looks like she ran into a brick wall you know she's like i just i went to bed at three and then we see blurry footage of the night before people party and stacy's like hi everybody i did morning shows so i was used to being up in the morning i feel great how are we

Yeah. And everyone just looks like a mess. And then they're talking about Jassy and, you know, like they're saying, like Mia's saying how like, oh, well, no one wants to be the other girl. I see it as someone who is the other girl. And then Jacqueline's saying that Jassy and Darius are going to be getting a house together. And Mia's like, so I was assigned peace. I got a house. I like, she's like, no one wants to be other girl, but I did get a house out of it.

And Jacqueline's like, oh, this is giving me goosebumps. So then Giselle is checking in with Wendy. And Karen's like, well, even though Mia sucked as a hostess, this trip helped me have something other to do than think about my court case. So for that, I am grateful. And basically, they're like, wow, that was fun. That was fun. Let's go home.

And they go home. And that was it for our little trip to Lake Norman. And now we return back to Potomac next week, where Karen will have to face the truth, bitterness of that cold case. Well, we'll see what happens. In the meantime, thanks everyone for being here, for listening. And we will catch you on the next episode. Bye, everyone. Bye.

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