My Sorority Nightmare [RE-RUN]
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Welcome back to episode two of Hot Mess. Last episode, I was talking about my freshman year of college, how amazing it was, and second semester, something happened where I was this close to transferring, and that was sorority recruitment. 🎵

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I don't even know where to begin with sorority recruitment. To anyone who's going through recruitment or to anyone who's gone through it, you know what I'm talking about. You feel like this is the most stressful days of your entire life. And let me tell you, it's not that deep. I promise. So I'm going to take you back. We're back at my freshman year of college at the University of Miami, and we rush second semester. So this is

A few months into school, you already kind of have your friends, you know people, and honestly, thank God for this. We go home for winter break, we come back, and it is rush week. All the girls come back to school, and you kind of get this set schedule. It's like four or five days, I don't really remember.

and I'm stressing out about what to wear. Me and my friends are texting in the group chat. We're sending different pictures of dresses. I'm like, my outfits have to be perfect or they're not gonna like me. We're sitting in our dorms. We're getting ready for the first day. At our school, there's two sororities that were kind of seemed to be the cool ones or that's what I thought and that's what I was told. So I had...

cousin that went to the University of Miami as well. She was in the grade above me and she was in the one sorority that I thought was the coolest thing in the entire world. So I'm like, my cousin's in the sorority. I'm a pretty normal girl. Like, you know, what can go that wrong? I slip on my outfit for the first day of recruitment. I think I'm wearing like skin tight jeans. You get a rush shirt for the first day and they put you into these groups and

So you're with a group of like 10 other girls. I don't remember exactly, but it's literally, it feels like camp. It feels like hell camp, honestly. The house that I had first was the house that I really wanted to be in. I remember going in for my first conversation and it's ridiculous thinking back how scared I was, but I think I blanked out. Like I was going in and out of consciousness. I was like, I feel woozy right now. I don't even know what this girl's saying to me.

and part of this is to do with my anxiety, but we were watching the sorority recruitment video that they were playing for us in there, and we were standing up, and I was like, I'm gonna faint right now. I don't feel good. I literally could not speak. Like, this was the scariest thing ever. Then we're going through rounds and rounds, and it's awkward conversations with girls. It's like very small talk. You have to talk about...

What does the sorority do and what do they like and what do you like? And you are talking all day throughout all five days of this recruitment process. So after each day of rush, you go through and you rank the houses from what you liked best to what you like to least. And then the houses also rank you. The second day of rush comes by. I open my card. I had the houses I wanted back. And I think that was a pretty normal day for me. Then this is kind of where the real cuts start to happen. We come back for the third day.

I open my card. I'm expecting to see the houses I like back and the one that I wanted the most, the one that my friends wanted the most and the one that my cousin was in had dropped me. And honestly, I got a little bit of a pit in my stomach. I'm going through every possibility in my head. I'm like, what could have gone wrong? Was this a glitch in the system? Like this had to be a mess up. Like I don't understand how I could have been dropped because I

I thought that as long as I had a family member in there with the last name, I kind of thought it was like, unless you do something really bad, like you'll get in. At this point, I still wasn't that upset because I was like, I like this other house. I had great conversations there. So I come back for the fourth day. I remember getting ready for this so specifically because I was texting my parents. I was so excited because I was for sure excited.

thinking that I was going to go back to this other house that I wanted. I remember thinking, I was like, I look great. I feel great. Like, this is amazing. I put on heels. My feet are bleeding walking across campus in these heels. But I was like, I don't care. This is so amazing. We get back. We're around the fountain on campus and everyone gets back their cards for the last day of rush.

I open my card and I see two houses. Neither of them were the ones that I wanted. I had been dropped by the second house that I liked. Looking back, the feeling that I felt is so crazy, but it's real. Like this is stressful. This is the next four years of your life. This is your social life. Like these are who your friends are gonna be or that's what I thought. And I just remember opening this card and

I looked to my friend who was in another group. I grabbed her and we sprinted to the bathrooms. I was like, you need to come with me now. I don't feel good. And the bathrooms during rush are insanity. There's always girls crying in there. It is just like, it's a shit show because it's not going to go the way that you want all the time. And...

It sucks. It hurts. It feels like someone does not like you. It's brutal, especially when you have other friends that are making it into these houses that you're not. I thought my life was over in this moment. So I'm in the bathroom with my friend. There's other girls crying in there. I'm crying in there. I remember the mascara running down my face. I'm looking at my friend.

I'm like, I don't know what to do right now. She doesn't know what to say to me. She doesn't know how to make me feel better. I am looking at myself in the mirror. All I could think of was that I was going to have to transfer. This was the end of my social life. This was the end of me having friends. This was the end of me having a good time at the University of Miami because I'm stripped of my friends who...

I made really, really great friends for a semester of college, which is very rare, but I wanted to stay with those friends. I loved them so much. I didn't want to branch out and make new friends. I was content with the people I was hanging out with. Then my thought process goes from, okay, I'm not going to be with any of my friends to what's wrong with me? Why am I the only one out of all of my friends that got dropped? Am I not good enough? Why

Am I not pretty enough? Do I not know how to hold a conversation? Am I annoying? Am I weird? Every possible negative thought about myself was running through my head at this moment. And this is the last day of rush. This was not, I get to go home and cry. This was, we're going to these two houses. I wipe my tears. Obviously my face is red and puffy from crying. Then I get ready to go to the next two houses that I had left.

Now, the first house that I went to, I feel so horrible and I want to deeply apologize to the girl that I was talking to this day because we didn't even have a conversation. I went in this house and I just cried. I like was trying. I was like, yeah, no, things are great today. I'm living.

loving rush i'm so excited to be here i'm crying and this is the day that you're supposed to find a girl you get close with her this is the one who's supposed to be your potential big sister in the sorority and they're playing i think they were playing like the guitar something sentimental and i'm just trying so hard to have a conversation with this girl but i could not help from crying um

So, that conversation didn't go well. This girl's probably like, okay, she's a nut job. Next. And then I finally go to the last house that I had. The girl that I got paired with, she is an angel because she sat down next to me and she

She was like, listen, it's okay. The same thing happened to me. Like she could tell that I was upset and she acknowledged it and she didn't make me feel weird for being upset. She was like, listen, I know that you think the other two are the coolest sororities. I know that that's what everyone says. I know that's what...

has gone on and she was like, trust me, we still party. We still have fun. Like we still have a social life. And she started telling me all these fun stories that she had from being in the sorority. And then her friend came over and the two of them started talking to me. I'll never forget this because

I never felt so genuinely cared about in the moment. And, you know, they made me feel better. They were like, listen, it's not the end of the world. I know you think it is. They were kind of insinuating that they had went through the same thing that I did. So I go home from the last day of rush. The next day is bid day where everyone opens the card. That's where you see what house you're in. And then you go and run and you jump and you party celebrate.

i didn't want to do any of those things but after talking to these two girls i was like you know what i'm just gonna stick it out i'm gonna go with this house i feel good talking to them they say they had a good time i'm just gonna try it out the next day comes around it's bid day we go outside on this big open field and everyone opens their cards i got the house where i was talking to the two girls

were very nice to me and I was okay with it. I was still upset, of course, and I just remember seeing all my friends running and jumping together and basically

bid day's fun. They have like pretty cool themes and I remember just being like, wow, like they just have such cool themes. Like they're such cool girls. Like I'm such a loser over here. I did not have a great bid day. After everyone runs, jumps, gets their card, meets their group, you kind of line up on this little stage area on the stairs and the frats come to watch. They all sit there. They see who the new sorority girls are and

I was so embarrassed to not be running out with one of these two cool sororities, which is so stupid. If you're listening to this, don't feel the way that I felt. We're going to get to that part. But I was crying. I was talking to my parents. They also didn't understand what had happened. I was beating myself up and that's okay. If you're doing that too, go through your emotions. But I

I'm here to tell you that I promise it gets better and everything happens for a reason. After rush is over, there's this thing called syllabus week. So this is the first week of classes. You basically go in, you get your syllabus for class, and you leave. So of course, this is the week that all the fun big parties are held because you can go out every night and you can be as hungover as you want and you don't need to be super prepared for class.

And the way that this works with fraternities and sororities is they kind of match up and have parties together. So you get a social schedule and it'll be you're with this fraternity Monday, this fraternity Tuesday, a different one Wednesday, a different one Thursday. It basically goes down the list as the days goes on. You have different planned parties. And I knew that none of these parties were going to be with my friends.

In the beginning, they're very strict with it can only be girls in this sorority and only guys in this fraternity. If you're not in it, you can't show up. So I thought that's the way it was going to be for the rest of college. I was like, oh my God, these friends I made first semester, I might as well just never speak to them again because I'm never going to see them because we can never go out together. I went to the parties this week and...

The girls in the sorority that I was in, the older girls, they took me in. They were so nice to me. And God bless them because they were the only ones who got me through this. Like, they just genuinely cared about me. At this point...

We're a few weeks into the semester and I'm doing fine. I made friends in this new sorority, but I still felt like maybe this wasn't right for me. Maybe I needed to transfer. I just, I had this feeling of sadness with me all the time.

all the time. I don't know if sadness is the right word, but I just couldn't help but seeing what my friends were doing and where they were going out and thinking that they were so much better than me because they were in these sororities. I had my guy friends come up to me after Rush during this week of parties, and they would say to me, what happened, Alex? Why aren't you in those two? It was like,

As if I didn't feel shitty enough about myself, then you have guys coming up to you who are like, what happened? Like, what's wrong with you? And all I could say was, I don't know. I don't know. And this is the most shallow way to be. There is no cool sorority. There is no cool girls. It's about who you connect with.

who you talk to, who genuinely cares about you. You don't want to be in a sorority just because they think you're cool. You want to be with people who care about you. That's the point of it. It's to make friends. But...

A lot of people don't care. A lot of people just kind of want the status and want to be in the cool one and want to go to the cool parties or feel like those are the cool parties because there is no such thing as one thing better than the other. I'm finally in a place the second semester of my freshman year where I feel good about myself. I had made friends. I...

Was still hurt by the fact I couldn't be with my friends, but I was getting used to it and We're on spring break freshman year and we hear about this virus that's going around called covid19 of course, I don't need to get into the details of that, but We had our spring break cut short. We were sent home go into a pandemic and The rest of that semester was online for me and selfishly I

was happy at the fact that I got to go home and be with my family and I didn't have to feel weird about being at school and these parties and this kind of gave me time to evaluate everything and get myself together. We go back for my sophomore year of college and I'm still in the sorority.

But because of the pandemic, the fraternities couldn't host these parties anymore. So there was no sorority fraternity party. It was kind of like little apartment parties. And I kind of started to integrate back into hanging out with the girls I did my first semester of college.

We didn't have these assigned designated plans anymore, so we could all kind of hang out together. It's this weird feeling like I just felt like I wasn't cool enough to be their friend. And sometimes I felt that. And sometimes even during this pandemic, they would say, we're going to have blank sorority only pregames. And I was like, right.

really, I can't come over to your apartment and just have a drink before we go out because they were so excited. And I don't blame them for being excited about their sorority and the girls that they're with. But another part of me is just like, it is so ridiculous that you can exclude one person like this. I felt embarrassed. And then if they did extend the invite to me, I was embarrassed to be there. I was like, oh, well, everyone's judging me because I'm at this sorority pregame, but I'm not in the sorority like

I'm the outcast here. So still dealing with these issues a little bit, but it was a lot better. As time went on, I was involved with helping make the recruitment video my sophomore year of college for sororities, and I was on the other side of rush. I was rushing girls, and I was seeing how the process happened.

This process is so brutal. It's disgusting. You're putting up all these girls basically on a PowerPoint and you're saying yes or no. And I kind of saw the process if there was a girl that was going to be dropped, how easy it was for someone to save her and how, you know, you could stand up for her and all of a sudden she'd be saved. This made me feel like shit because I saw the other side of it. I saw...

that it was easy for someone to be saved. If they were getting dropped, you could say, oh no, well, I really liked them. Let's push for them. Let's keep them. And all I could think was, no one did that for me. No one thought I was good enough to stand up for. And I just was thinking this process is horrible.

I didn't like seeing other girls go through this. I didn't like going through it. And I know a lot of people have a hard time with it. Even if you get into the sorority that you want, there's still other places that drop you and you feel like shit about yourself. So after this...

I got a little really quick and then I decided to drop the sorority and honestly so did my little. We were like, let's get out of here. But I made really good friends through it. Like my little, I still talk to her today. My sorority was one of the stricter ones with postpartum.

Posting drinking on your story. I would post just like at the club on my story in miami Like I always do and I would get in trouble for it and when I get in trouble for things i'm very bad I'm, like well now I just want to do it more like I want to keep doing it I'm, not good with being told what to do so You know The party thing didn't really matter anymore. If anything i'm just kind of getting in trouble at this point and

You're paying to be in the sorority. I have to go to these meetings. There's things I have to do. I just was like, at this point, I'm okay. I'm ready to drop. I don't really think I need this anymore. I'll figure it out. I'll be able to go out without this. And I dropped. In that moment, freshman year, when I wanted to transfer schools, if I could go back and do it all over again right now, I would have it stay the exact same.

Not only was it a life lesson, but I met amazing people. I truly think that everything happens for a reason. I don't think I would be where I am today if this didn't happen. And I can't help but think, would I have been one of these shallow girls who

Thinking that being in the coolest sorority made you the coolest girl and if you weren't in that sorority you weren't shit like Would I have been that person? I don't know and that scares me. There is no cool sororities. There is no cool people sororities aren't for everyone They definitely weren't for me. I'm grateful that I went through this process and This happened to me because looking back now

I'm like, this is the stupidest thing ever. Why are you even talking about this right now? The words that are coming out of my mouth about how I felt freshman year are embarrassing for me to even say, but it feels like your life is on the line. So if you're going through the sorority recruitment process, just go into it with an open mind. Don't be so scared. Just be yourself. It's all gonna work out. Even if it doesn't feel like it, what's meant to be will be. And if you just went through it,

and you're in the sorority that you wanted, that's amazing. But don't turn around and judge people who aren't. That's all for this segment. I just needed to get that off my chest. Spoiler alert.

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It is time to get real with me. I'm going to do my skincare routine right now and tell you guys how a date this week ended up with me in the emergency room. NFL man plans a really nice date for us. We're going to like one of my favorite restaurants. I'm so excited. I go over to his house and all of a sudden before we're going on this date, I'm like buckled over in pain. I'm feeling this pain in my lower stomach. I kind of thought it was gas. So I was like, oh my gosh, like, I don't know.

That can't be happening on date night. I'm bent over in pain and all of a sudden this turns into me not being able to walk. I like literally can't stand up. At this point, I started getting super, super nauseous and I thought I was going to throw up. So I like hobble over to the toilet. I'm like dry heaving and my ears start ringing and now I'm like,

Like ghostly pale. I feel like i'm gonna pass out. I don't know what is going on right now I'm, like I think i'm dying like i'm really not sure so at this point I like go get him because I think that i'm gonna pass out from the amount of pain that i'm in And obviously if i'm passing out like I need someone there to take care of me So i'm like holding on to him I am like screaming in pain like when I tell you like i'm not sure if I was giving birth Like I don't know i've never felt pain like this in my life, but I really thought that it was gas and

And that's like an awkward thing to say obviously when you're with a guy like I don't want to be like hey Like I don't know what's going on down here He said to me he was like maybe your appendix is rupturing like I don't know what's going on this went on for like 30 to 40 minutes and I was just like obviously We cannot go on this date and he's like we need to take you to the er right now Like I have never been in this much pain in my entire life

So I had a pair of clothes at his house. I put it on and we are in the car on the way to the ER. At this point, the pain got a little bit better and we're sitting in the emergency room. I still, I'm so confused what's happening to me. I'm scared. I literally think that like my appendix, I'm about to have surgery. Like, I don't know what's going on. So we're in the waiting room waiting to be seen. And lo and behold, these guys come up because they recognized him first. I heard them saying his name and then they recognized me and they asked to take a picture with the both of us.

I'm buckled over in pain. These guys are like, oh, like, we just want to take a picture. I'm like, they probably think, like, I don't know, I'm having a baby. Like, why are we in the emergency room together? And I'm like, oh, Lordy, here we go. This is about to be an experience.

The nurse calls me in to go and to get like my blood done and he's like do you want me to come with you? And honestly, I was scared. So I just was like yes, like come I did not think before saying yes for him to come in this room with me I told the doctor the symptoms that I was having they're taking my blood which also scares me so I couldn't look and because it's my Lower abdomen pain. They're asking me questions about like gas they're like

Have you been like pooping regularly? Are you having chronic diarrhea? Like what's been happening? Are you constipated? And this guy is sitting across the room from me. He like has his head down in his hands because he obviously knows it's awkward for me. It's awkward for him. I'm like, oh my God. Oh my God.

Like, I don't even talk about peeing in front of this guy. I'm like, this is not happening right now. Like, why did I tell him to come in with me? Just kill me right now. Like, the doctor's asking if I'm going to shit my pants and the guy that I like is sitting across from me and I tell him that girls don't poop. I'm like, oh my God, like what is happening?

They lay me down on this table and the doctor is feeling around in my stomach. I'm obviously texting my girlfriends at the time what's happening. And I'm like, I think it's gas. So they're like, girl, you better clench those cheeks right now if he's sitting in the room with you. And I'm like freaking out. I'm like, oh my God.

Oh my God. So we proceed to go into the next room. They take me in first to get a CAT scan. I've never had anything like this done before. They gave me iodine, which they were like, it's gonna make you feel really hot. So I'm basically laying down on this bed. It's rocking back and forth through this machine. They have iodine in my arm. My body's like a million degrees. I'm freaking out. I don't know what's going on. I come back from that scan and they tell me basically that I have a huge ovarian cyst on my right ovary.

So I text my friends. I tell them that it's an ovarian cyst. And thankfully, a few of my friends have actually dealt with this before. So they were like kind of telling me what it meant, what the procedure is, like how to deal with this. But at this point, they had to put me in for another scan, which was like an internal ultrasound to kind of like check out the cysts, see what was going on. I'm still very anxious and nervous at this point. I have never had a cyst before. I really don't know about these cysts. And I

Obviously all of the scariest thoughts are running through my mind at this moment They were telling me they basically had to check to see if it was good if there was blood flow to it If I was going to have to get surgery if we were going to leave it alone I'm getting this internal ultrasound. This also took like an hour We were probably in the er for a total of like four hours I also don't know if this is like a super severe issue Like i'm talking about this with the doctors in front of this guy. I'm like, oh my gosh, like

I just, I want my mom right now. Like I want my friends. Like I was just so nervous. So it actually turns out that these ovarian cysts are a common thing for girls to get. I ended up posting about it on my TikTok this past week, kind of saying that's what happened just to like let everyone know I was okay because I had posted in the emergency room.

and the amount of comments that i got from girls that have also had these cysts have been in this pain it turns out that basically mine had ruptured a tiny bit like there was a little bit of fluid and blood and they said that they just needed to monitor it and make sure that it was going down in size and not getting bigger but they basically were like yeah you need to go to the gynecologist like within the next two days and you need to go back every week which this is just scaring me at this point because what if i hadn't gone to the emergency room

Honestly, if I was alone, I probably would have like dealt with the pain even though it was so excruciating and like thought it was gas and like let it pass but because I was with this guy he was like something isn't right like your body's reacting to something like let's just go let's get you checked out. Let's just make sure everything's okay. And obviously everything wasn't okay. So I don't know. It's just so crazy that like I was at the gynecologist in August and they don't do these kind of like

imagery scans and no one had told me that I had this cyst. Like apparently it's been there for a minute. The doctors had told me that it's pretty big. So yeah,

Now I'm asking questions because I am clueless. I don't know what this means. And they're telling me that basically it's like a balloon. So if it twists, which is like if you were to twist a balloon, the airflow wouldn't be able to go in. They have to do these scans to make sure that it doesn't twist and that the blood flow is regular because if it twists, then you might have to go in for surgery.

And from what I hear, the surgery itself is not too bad, but the recovery is pretty long because they have to go through like your lower abdomen muscles and it can just be like a pretty intensive surgery. But also a lot of girls have gone through this and I've had no idea. Like reading these comments from girls, I'm just like, why is this not more commonly talked about? And like, why have I never seen this before? Why have I never heard of this? Why have I never been checked for this? So I feel like this is...

A good reminder that if you're feeling like something's off, maybe just go get it checked out. It's better to be safe than sorry. Now, basically, I've been to the gynecologist. We basically just either have to wait for it to go away, hope it doesn't get bigger, hope it doesn't rupture, and hope I don't have to have surgery.

But this has left me with a really weird and anxious feeling. Like I feel a lot better knowing what it is, but I have this kind of weird crampy feeling in my lower right stomach. And now that I know that it's there, I just keep thinking about it. And I was even at dinner last night and I haven't felt anxious like this about a specific health problem in so long.

I kept saying to my roommate, Kristen, I just was like, I'm so scared right now. Like, what if something happens? What if we're at dinner? What if I feel this pain again? I woke up in the middle of the night and I had to go to the bathroom. I was so scared that I was going to feel this pain again. I would be lying if I said I wasn't still a little worried. And I know that I got it checked out. I'm going to keep getting it checked out. But it's just this

Underlying thought in my mind and I just I don't know I feel like I can feel it now more that I know that it's there and it's scary, but Hopefully everything is okay. I will keep you guys updated. I'm supposed to be getting my period this week So they said that after that it should start to go down But that's basically how my date night ended up in the er another thing So we get into this room and the doctor asks me to pee in the cup

I go to the bathroom, I pee, I bring it back. I was clearly so dehydrated at this point. Like I had not drinking any water. I'm trying to get better now about drinking water because this was a wake-up call for me. My pee in this cup was brown and I'm carrying this brown cup of liquid into the room. He literally was like, um, have you drank water like ever in your life? I'm like, oh, I'd like...

This just like couldn't have been a worse, less romantic date night. But I'm honestly really glad that I feel close with him and he was able to bring me and like kind of initiated us going to the emergency room because clearly I needed to go. All in all though, girls...

If you're dealing with this or if you've dealt with this, you're not alone. I hope that this helps someone listening or educates anyone else because I really didn't know and...

I'm happy I know now and I'm happy I have this platform where I'm able to speak to you guys and let you know what's going on in my life. But this was probably the most unromantic date of my life. That's okay though. They can't all be 12 out of 10s. I think that's all for this Get Real With Me segment though.

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Welcome to the first ever What Would Alex Do segment. I had you guys last week write in questions or scenarios. I'm going to tell you what I would do.

Maybe it's not going to be the best advice. I don't know. But a lot of these things I've had similar experiences to you guys. So I'm going to share with you guys what I did and what I think maybe you should do or maybe not do. I don't know.

All right, let's get into it. You guys wrote a lot of questions about guys. The girlies need some boy advice. What should I do if I found a pair of Lululemons that were not mine in my boyfriend's apartment and he says he doesn't know who they belong to? Run. I mean...

If he says he doesn't know who they belong to, not looking great, you know, at least maybe if he has like a sister or like a mom hanging out with him. I don't know. But honestly, I was in a similar situation to this. I wasn't dating the guy, but I'm going to tell you what happened.

So my freshman year of college I was getting with this guy I go over to his place and I see a girl's Dress like mangled. It was a zebra print dress like at the end of the bed now. I was not dating this guy. So Technically, he didn't owe me anything But like at least clean your room you pig like i'm coming over at least clean your bed sheets Like I don't know. I was just so turned off by the fact there was another girl's dress there like Sometimes guys just are not paying attention so I

I'm going to tell you what Alex would do. I did not get mad at the guy. I kind of just like made an excuse left or whatever because I was just grossed out. And I found out the girl that he was getting with. And you're probably thinking, oh, gosh, like, what did she do to that girl? No, this is one of my best friends to this day. I didn't know her at the time, but I knew that we had class together.

So I went up to her after class. We like kind of made small talk and like kind of brought it around to the fact that we were getting with the same guy. Me and this girl became best friends and we just both ditched this guy because we were like, okay, he's slimy. Like we don't need to talk to him. And honestly, it blossomed a great friendship. So, you know, this guy had great taste in girls because we're amazing and we're best friends to this day. So I don't know in your situation, I

Maybe, maybe she's, I don't know. Good luck, Charlie. What would you do if you thought someone was cute at the gym?

I would probably not talk to them because I feel like I'm looking at my low at the gym. Like I know some girls like do their hair and makeup for the gym and I aspire to be them. I'm not really looking cute at the gym. And I'm also not that great with going up to guys first. Like I would kind of prefer if they just came up to me because I always have the mindset of like, oh, well, if they wanted to, they would. So I probably would never say anything. Yeah.

I think you could go to the gym though one day preparing, follow this guy, stalk him, know when he's going to be at the gym and maybe this is your day, shoot your shot. But like in a way, I would probably more so just ask him like, what are you doing? Where do you live? Or like if he's like, if your gym has a little bar, a juice bar or something, like follow him around. Basically stalk this guy. Oh my God, I'm like terrified of dates. What do I do? Help.

Big Al loves a date. I would pretty much say yes to a date with anyone. I just think dates are so fun and they do not have to be scary. I think my love for dates started when I was in college because it was either sit in the dorms and go to the dining hall or microwave the mac and cheese I had in there or go to a nice restaurant in Miami and get dressed up. Of course, I'm going on the date. So I don't

think they have to be that scary though I usually trick myself into thinking that I'm already like best friends with this person so I kind of just try and like joke around with them have fun keep it light you don't need to go into it like so serious that always makes me feel better just like laughing about everything just go have fun and if it sucks then you never need to go again but at least you tried what is the most crazy out of pocket thing a guy has ever said to you

So my experience with the guys that are from born and raised in Miami, they're always a little bit cocky and their way of flirting with you is like kind of shitting on you. So one time I was at the bar with this guy. He gave me his card. He was like, oh, you can order a strength. Like just tell the bartender and here's my card. So I'm at the bar. It's very crowded. The bartenders are very busy. I could not get their attention. They were running back and forth. So like

10 minutes later, this guy comes back over and he's like, where are the drinks? And I was like, oh, like the bartender like hasn't really looked over yet. This guy looks at me and says, maybe if you had some tits, the bartender would pay attention to you. This was before my boob job.

But even so, like what? Excuse you. In that moment, I was so upset and like humiliated, which I shouldn't have been. But I just obviously didn't feel good. So I handed him back his card. I was like, OK. And I just walked out. I left. I called an Uber. I went home.

Flash forward two weeks, I see him out again at the bar and I kind of set the scene for the same scenario. And now I'm going in with a plan. We're looking for revenge. So...

I'm like, oh, I'll get us drinks. He gives me his card. I go over to the bar and I'm not getting drinks for me and this guy. I'm getting drinks for the entire bar for me and all my friends. And we're getting the most expensive tequila. He comes back over and he sees that we had just gotten all these drinks. And I was like, oh, yeah, but you give me a card, right? That's fine. And he was freaking out. But these guys also like to act like they're the shit. He handed my friend this specific bottle of 1942 tequila.

before and he was like this is probably the most expensive thing you've ever held in your life so they like to like be cocky flaunty like Pretends like he can buy the world. So I was like, okay. Well, then you can buy these drinks So i'm like we'll have 13 shots of 1942, please And he was like freaking out. He's tweaking out. He's like wait. Well, wait, this is my parents card You can't do this and I was like, oh really? and

I forget exactly what I said, but he basically like because of his ego like couldn't say no and then me and all my friends had a great night and That's what alex did in that scenario the love of my life wants to fly me out to his state But I have an important test for class that I can't miss What would alex do my senior year of college? I

I was very good at going to class, getting my test done, and then going straight to the airport. I would definitely make sure you take your test. Don't skip out on it. And then you can see the guy because I don't think any guy is worth failing a class for. But just tell him you need to flight after your class. Get the test done and then go to the airport. What would Alex do if your best friend FaceTimes you in her ex's car?

because they have been sleeping together. True story. Well, first of all, she's not your best friend. I would definitely cut this person out of my life. She would not have my number to be FaceTiming. And I think people need to realize that it's okay to kind of cut friendships off when they aren't healthy or when they aren't adding to your life. That's what you would do in a romantic relationship. So

you know, don't treat it any different. I think if it's your best friend, definitely have a talk, like definitely sit down. I think that's the way to go about it. I don't know. There's always two sides to every story. Doesn't look great there, but I think definitely have a talk. And if it's someone who's not having your best interest at heart, that's what friends are for. Then you are totally fine to cut that person out of your life. I've had to do that a lot this year and I

I just don't want people in my close circle that don't have my best interest in heart. And I can make a whole other episode on this with friendships. But, you know, definitely respect yourself and you should have a friend that respects you as well. But if I picked up the phone and she was in his car and I knew in that moment...

I probably would like go off. Big Al can go crazy sometimes. All right, this one's a little different. This just asks me about my hangover cure. And I feel like I get this question a lot because I do post going out, but then I'm pretty good at like doing things and getting up and going the next day.

I think it depends. There are two types of hangovers. There's the one where you're like a little nauseous, don't feel good, don't feel great. And I think actually sitting in bed all day and like eating to the hangover makes it worse. Of course, though, if I have nothing to do, like I will sit in bed and order food and do nothing. But I think like forcing yourself to get up and go out honestly makes it a lot better. And, you know, you have a little nausea throughout the day, but you're OK.

On the other hand, there's the hangovers where you are spinning. You can't stand up. Like I've had a few of these this year and I'm

not cute literally nfl man was driving me home from his place one time and I Was like, I don't feel good. I don't feel good. He had to pull over the car I'm in the parking lot of this bank puking the people in the bank came out and were like giving me a cold towel I was like, oh my god This is honestly like this just could not be worse right now If it's one of those spinny nauseating hangovers and you can't get out of bed then honestly like

I feel like a cold compress on the head. Sleep as much as you can. Chug Pedialyte. This has actually been a newfound discovery of mine. I don't know where Pedialyte has been in my whole life, but it's honestly so good. I just put a straw in there and like close my eyes and just sip. And soup. I love soup. I think soup always helps.

I think that pretty much wraps up episode two, which is crazy to say. For the What Would Alex Do segment, there is the Hot Mess Instagram and the Hot Mess TikTok. If you go to the link in the bio, there is a website where you can write in these questions. I think the scenarios are kind of funny, so I can really give you advice on what exactly I would do.

But I guess that's a wrap. Episode two. I'll see you guys next Thursday. Bye.