The following podcast is a Dear Media production. Hello.
who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SpongeBob SquarePants. Yes. Who is a gay couple under the sea? SpongeBob SquarePants. They are not a gay couple under the sea. It's Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy. I'm pretty sure they're a gay couple under the sea, girl. That is like a typical like Palm Springs couple. I feel like Mermaid Man is definitely like the daddy and Barnacle Boy is giving very much the twink of the town. Would you agree?
Yeah, I agree. Everyone, please welcome the ever so cutesy Justice Fester to my podcast. Girl, did you take a melatonin?
Hi guys. Girl, we're in the set of Spongebob today. And if you guys are not watching, we are dressed as Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy. Yeah. So this is the first time that you guys are seeing Justice in my pod. And as like everyone, everyone ever, whoever was online, it's very awkward your first time being online. So that's why Miss Justice Fester is a bit quiet.
I'm a bit shy. He was actually forced to be here today because Princess and Miss K could not film today. And I was like, who do I have? I don't want to read scary stories by myself. And who better else to be here than this really big man next to me. He can protect me from all of the swangs and the monsters. So today, what are we doing today, Papa?
Reading spooky stories. Okay, yeah. So we are going to be reading some spooky ooky stories for you guys. We made a post yesterday on The Baddest Radio. If you guys are not following The Baddest Radio, please follow her because you guys can send in stories just like today. But we asked you guys to send in some dating scurry stories. And the first time, a lot of people were just sending scary stories. And so we made a different post that was like, dating scary spooky stories, please. And we asked you guys to send in some dating scary stories.
And we got some for you guys to read today. But before we go ahead and read some of your spooky stories, I have a couple of questions for Justice Fester to get in the vibes of the Halloween. Papa, what is your favorite scary movies? My favorite scary movie would probably be Haunted House. Haunted House? Or Monster House.
Monster House? Which one, girl? Those are two different ones. Monster House. That's what it is. Monster House. Well, I don't really... Pat said, that's your favorite? I'm not really big on Halloween movies, so I just kind of threw something out there, but... Why is that one your favorite Halloween movie, though? Why was that the one that you threw out?
I just remember watching it as a kid and I thought it was entertaining. Okay, cute. What is your favorite Halloween candy? I asked Miss K and Princess this last week. I like the Oreos with the orange filling. The Halloween...
Oreos? So just regular Oreos, but orange. That part. And would you like to tell the audience why orange filling? Because orange is my favorite color. Do you believe in ghosts, Papa? I do believe in ghosts. Have you had any paranormal experience that you would like to share with us today before we start reading? I have had paranormal experiences, but I would rather not talk about them. He said waking up to you is spooky already.
Wait, what do you mean? You don't want to talk about it. Why? Because it's... You don't want to wake them up. Yeah. I...
I do believe in ghosts, but I choose not to pay attention to them. That makes sense. Yeah. Papa, I'm pretty sure everyone is asking. By the way, this is not going to be the episode where I interview or you guys get to know too much of Justice Fester. We will save that for probably like a Valentine's Day episode or something of the sort. So save your questions and think of questions to ask Mr. Justice Fester. But remember,
You are from the Midwest. Yes, I am. I'm from Illinois. He's from Illinois. And were your Spooky Ookie stories based in Illinois? Yes, they were. I've never had any encounters at all in Hawaii. Oh, period. Except me, of course.
Hold on you guys, I'm gonna try to fix my fan right here because girl, this has to be the hottest episode thus yet. Not because my man is hot and we're both hot, but my AC broke in my attic and that is where my studio is and basically bitch, I literally feel like I am in Satan's asshole right now. So let me fix this fan real quick. Cue in the intro. Bratman to Earth, Earth to Bratman. Girl, you already know who it is.
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Hi lovelies, I'm sex educator Ruby Rare. And I'm Megan Barton-Hanson, an OnlyFans creator, former sex worker and sex positive columnist. In our brand new podcast, The Ins and Outs, we're welcoming you to an unfiltered, playful and inclusive space to talk all about sex in all its glory, nuance and messiness. I feel like we're the sex education people need. Yeah.
We'll unpick all the big questions like how do we talk about kinks and fantasies? Does stress kill the vibe? Oh, and does wearing socks actually lead to better orgasms? So come on in. Listen or watch wherever you get your podcasts. It's going to be juicy. All right, you guys. Please feel free in the comments down below to force Justice to tell us his ooky spooky stories. Because why don't you want to share it with us, Papa? It brings up bad memories. Was it giving childhood? Yes.
just share us one I don't want to peer pressure you but I don't want to peer pressure you but you first I already shared oh your spooky stories yes I already did I already did
With Princess MSK. Also, you guys, Mr. Justice Fester is not allowed to watch any of my podcast episodes. He has not watched any of them yet, right? No. He's only watched probably like the one minute clips. Yeah. He told me that he doesn't want me to watch them. So I have not watched them at all. Period. We love a man that listens. Because I don't.
If you told me not to watch this shit, I'd be like, I'm already watching it. All right, you guys. Like always, I'm going to read you guys the tea. Yeah. And the tea is basically me reading a page from my diary. Today, I'm going to read My Face Mask Night with Justice Fester because it's the picture that we use to get you guys to send in some stories. So let's talk about it. That's in September. Let me find it first. Oh, okay. I found it.
So this is what the page looks like, you guys. Zoom in. It has our pictures of us just doing a face mask. Anyways, I'm going to read it to you guys. May 24th, 2024. So last night I got pregnant. Oh, why was that the first fucking sentence?
So last night I got pregnant and I honestly already feel like the baby is kicking. I can't wait for my gender reveal party because I think I'm carrying a boy like Dream and Jessica. Oh my God, my friend Dream and Jessica. They were still pregnant around this time. They already gave birth. Shout out to y'all.
My baby might be a Capricorn on Aquarius, which honestly suits my vibe as a Leo mother. Today, I got to spend the whole day with my man. And again, we about to spend it making an inflatable pool, javelin throws, sunsets, and maybe do his brows. Now back to me being a mother. I have to get back to filming on Wednesday or Thursday, honestly. So it's giving work mother. Hashtag woman in STEM.
I have to also pick up a new fish this week. And I'm so beyond excited for that because I miss my fish, Bula, so much. Oh my God, I just choked on my spit. So yeah, I remember that day, actually. I remember this whole entry. Do you remember this day? The day you got me pregnant? Like it was yesterday. Oh wait, I should have read it with my glasses on.
Whatever. No, I'll read it. I'll read the stories with these on. Papa, would you like, would you have kids with me one day? Yes, I'd love kids with you. Period. I really feel like with the pace that we're going, I really feel like I'm about to be the first man with a child. Like, honestly. One could only dream. One could only dream. Is that like your least favorite part about being gay? Very much so. How long have you been gay?
I've been well I've known since I was 14 I came out of the closet at 14 oh so a while I'm 27 now so that's yeah 13 years damn you've been a faggy for 14 years yeah I kind of just never gave a fuck
So how did your mom react? She was in denial at first. My parents didn't think I was gay at all. They just thought it was like a phase because they were like, she was like, I raised you. There's no way you're like, I don't know. She was just a little bit in denial about it, I guess, because I'm more like, like masculine, straight acting, whatever.
A lot of you guys may not know this, but Justice Fester has a YouTube channel. He was in high school and he had a coming out story. I do. Would you like to tell them who your favorite drag queen is and why?
Well, I haven't watched her in a while, but when I was in high school, like, I don't know, my inspo, I guess, or somebody looked up to is Adore Delano or Danny Noriega. Or Angel Baby. Yeah, Angel Baby. I used to think her videos were hilarious. Period. And were you watching her videos and you were like, I'm gay? No, I just thought her videos were entertaining. Papa, since you don't want to share any spooky, ooky ghost stories, don't.
Do you have any fond Halloween stories that you want to share with us today? No. Halloween's usually, I don't know. It's just like, it's not really a big holiday to me. So I don't have like... Well, that's all the time we have for you today. Thank you so much. Oh my God. How dare you talk shit about... I'm not talking... That is the spookiest thing anyone has ever said to me!
I'm not talking shit. It's just I don't have any crazy. I'm hearing a lot of this.
Have you ever thought about your drag name? I've not. I've not thought about my drag name at all. I feel like your name is a drag name. Yeah, my name is pretty unisex. Yeah, just this. Yeah. I feel like, you know how a lot of drag names are like very, either rhymes or there's like, it's like a word that's like a play on word.
Would you do Justice League as your last name? Like Justice League or like, I don't know. Juicy Goosey? That's crazy. It tastes like your dick. Ooh, that's good.
Justice is served? Justice served. Oh my God. Justice is served. That's cute. But your last name is Isserve. Isserve. Isserve. Justice Isserve. That's cunt. Have you been a drag queen before? I'm kidding. In the past, like. Yeah. By the way, you guys, we're going to give you guys a little short story of how we met. We met six years ago. And...
We'll leave it at that because I feel like I've shared it so many fucking times. I will let him tell his side of the story one of these days because I feel like y'all have heard my side already. But I guess we'll wait for the Valentine Day story. Yeah, don't even get me started on that shit. Do you remember this night that we did a face mask? I do. What do you remember about it? It was cute. Very relaxing.
This was a couple days after you asked me to be your boyfriend. It was. Yeah. You want me so fucking bad. Like, that's crazy. Like, you want me. Wait, this is like the first time that people are seeing me with a boyfriend online. Pretty crazy. And this is probably the most that they have ever heard you talk.
- Yeah, I don't talk very much. - He talks, you guys. He really talks. My favorite thing about you is how calm you are. You're very calming energy. I feel like a lot of people have called that out in a lot of our videos that we film, like when we're trying fruits on TikTok.
Would you agree that you're a very calm person? - Yes, I do very much agree with that. - Period. We're getting very much like the OA and nonchalant couple for sure. I'm very, well, yeah, no, I'm very extravagant, extra and like talks to everybody. And he's more very much into himself
just shy. Yeah. You're super shy, super shy. But Brett thinks that I'm the golden retriever and he's a black cat, so. Yeah. He thinks it's actually reverse. Well, okay, this is what I was trying to say. I feel like outwardly, and I feel like a lot of people and a lot of couples can relate to this, but like outwardly towards other people, I could see people seeing you as a golden retriever and me as a black cat, but
within ourselves i feel like i'm the golden retriever and you're the black cat yeah why are you saying that like i'm making you say agree with me you don't agree with that no i definitely see myself as a black cat i feel like i'm very reserved and kind of quiet kind of like some people think i'm like mysterious so i could see myself definitely being a black cat period
Yeah, I really feel like we have tendencies for sure. You know, I have black cat tendencies and I have golden retriever tendencies. You have black cat tendencies, you have golden retriever tendencies or whatever the fuck. I woke up like this.
I woke up like this is exactly what my mind says when I wake up from my Blissy sleep. Yeah. You guys don't even understand how the Blissy sleeping pillowcases have helped me with my skin and my hair and just waking up flawlessly, honestly. Blissy definitely put the beauty in beauty sleep because if you guys are a face sleeper like me, you guys might struggle with acne like how I used to. But
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That's B-L-I-S-S-Y dot com slash TheBaddest. And use code TheBaddest to get an additional 30% off. Your skin and your hair will thank you. Is there any Halloween questions, any spooky stories you would like to know about me or ask about me or the audience before we start reading these? Yeah, do you have any spooky stories that you haven't shared?
Okay, I will share this story here because I really feel like I already told the story to Princess and Miss K. And I feel like I've been teasing it to the audience about what goes down in my neighborhood. As some of you guys know, I live way up in the mountains here in Hawaii.
And I won't tell you guys my night marcher story. I will probably save that for the story with Princess and Kiefer. Okay, so it's kind of hard to tell the story because a lot of you guys don't know where I live. But to enter my neighborhood, you have to go through kind of like driveway. And then at the end of the driveway is a security hut. And they let you in and out, whatever the fuck. So this was around...
Christmas time, I was coming home from Christmas. I always told people it was during New Year, but now that I'm thinking about it, it was definitely Christmas that I was coming home from Ever Beach and it was 1030 at night. I left Ever Beach at 1030. So that means I got around. I got home around like 11, 1120 and I was coming home.
I was turning into the driveway, like the straight driveway. You know how it's like all palm trees and stuff like that. I'm sure you guys have seen me like running it in videos or like you guys have seen it before. But as I was about to turn in to the driveway of the neighborhood, I saw a lady that was literally right in the middle of the road.
As I was turning. Did I tell you this story before? Yeah, she told me. The white dress. Yes. Yeah. So it was this older woman. Mind you, there is no street lights that were out and open for some reason around that time. Especially at that turn, there is no street lights. The street lights only starts happening at the straightaway. So anyways, I saw this lady at the turn.
And I thought that it was an older woman who couldn't see where she was going. So I obviously turned my bright lights on. And she looked like she was crossing the road. So I thought I was helping her. But she was not moving. I turned my bright lights on. And I'm creeping up to her. As I had my fucking finger. I had my finger on the window to put it down to maybe ask her if she needs help. I...
press the button and I look at her, y'all, she didn't have a face. This woman did not have a face. So I literally pumped the fucking gas. I'm just like looking straight, like, girl, I'm looking just straight in and I'm looking in my side view mirror to see if she's still there. She's still very much there. And every time that I think about this story, I
Always remembered her not having feet. Like her feet was not touching the ground, Papa. And when I got to the guard shack...
The guard, respectfully, was asleep, like, as they deserve to sleep. So I'm literally there, like, watching her, like, waiting for her to wake up, basically, because at the time I didn't have the clicker to, like, open the gates automatically. So I'm just waiting for her to wake up. I didn't want to yell at her. So I turn up my music. She heard it. She lets me in.
And I rush home. I grab all my four dogs. I had four dogs at the time. It was Tora, Elle, Leela, rest in peace Leela, and Caillou. And I, and you know, I don't sleep with my dogs in my bed, but bitch at that day, that night I had all my dogs sleep with me and I was, I didn't even wash my face. I was just under the blankets and I had all four dogs with me sleep with me. And I was like, yeah, okay.
And the crazy thing is the next day, obviously this happened my first year of living in this neighborhood. And I had already made like a couple friends that were from this side of the island. And I was telling them about it. And then they were like, yeah, a lady hung herself there at the bridge a couple years ago. And then another one of my friends, shout out to Matt and Ha'a, they were like, yeah, there was like a murder. They found a body there at the bridge. Like, yeah.
I guess apparently like where that turn is and where the bridge is, a lot of things are always happening. Like accidents, freak accidents, suicides, like and all that. So that's my story. Okay, that does remind me. I may have lied because I have experienced one encounter before.
While we were dating. You know about this. I just forgot about it because I pushed it back my head. Oh my God. Papa, no. What?
That was not... It was literally like a month or two ago. Okay, you can tell them. Whatever. We were sleeping in the middle of the night and... It was not in the middle of the night. Yes, it was. We were about to go to bed. No, it was in the middle of the night. Oh, is this when you fell? Yes. Oh, okay. Never mind. I was thinking about another time. So, it was windy that night, but we literally closed every door, every window. There was no wind in the house whatsoever. So, we were sleeping...
And it was probably like four in the morning. I heard, I was faced away from the door. I heard behind me, I heard the door open and I sleep by the door. He sleeps away from like farther away from the door. I heard the door open and I felt,
something cold on my back like up my shirt and then something pulled my shirt and I fell out of the bed and Brett woke up and he thought that I had just fell out of the bed but then I didn't say anything I climbed back up in bed and I didn't go back to sleep because I couldn't go back to sleep after that and then when I got up for work and I was getting ready he was like did you fall out of the bed last night I was like
I'm pretty sure like something grabbed me. I heard the door open and something touched me and grabbed my shirt and that's, and pulled me. And yeah, that's basically my story. That's my story. And I'm sticking to it. He didn't believe me though. I would rather not believe you. I mean, I'm not saying that didn't happen, but for my safety and my mental health, I
Because obviously, Papa, I only see you weekends. I'm sleeping by myself five days in a week. So I'm going to convince myself that you imagine that and I'm going to let myself experience it for myself. Well, I did kind of ignore it and kind of brush it off and I haven't experienced anything since. So I'm going to keep doing that. Well, thank you for protecting me that night.
Alright you guys. I'm sure you guys are bored of hearing our stories. That was probably not even scary for y'all. But it's now time to read you guys more spooky ookie stories. Papa, are you ready to read spooky ookie stories? Yeah, I'm ready. Do you know what a spooky ookie is? Scary.
Spooky Uki is her. Oh my god, my underwear! I'm really out here! Oh my god, girl. I'm so sorry. I'm out here stripping. Girl, why do you get the pants? You wanted that. No, I really did want the Barnacle Boy fantasy more. Usually Mermaid Man is dressed up as a girl and Barnacle Boy is dressed up as a boy, but... Okay, girl. I'm gonna remove... We did it reversed.
Alright you guys, we're gonna start. Thank you guys again for sending in your stories. Story number one. This one is sent in by Ancy. Are you ready? Ready. Me and my best friends are both gay.
In 11th grade, during the peak of exploring our sexuality and having new experiences, my best friend met this one man that he really fell head over heels for. That man was not all up for an emotional connection at that point. But obsession being a dangerous thing, my best friend told me that he found a love spell on the internet. Not just any love spell, but a Latin love spell. As dumb 17-year-olds we were, we thought it'd be funny to give it a shot.
We prepared everything that was mentioned, candles and everything. We did as the spell instructed us, not realizing what we were stepping into. The desired results were here within a week. We started paying more attention to my best friend and would spoil him. We got to know that the man was married and had kids. The moment it was revealed, my best friend pulled out
But shit started going downhill from there. We heard he divorced his wife, ignored the kids, and not just that, but every relationship he got to in later on, he would break up and get very abusive. We felt guilty about it and we contacted a spiritual acclaimed person and stated everything. He made us do a spiritual cleansing for 21 days and after that, we didn't hear anything about him for years.
Later, we got to know that he moved out of our city and was living elsewhere sanely. So be careful, y'all, because some shit isn't to be played with. I put a spell on you. How does that make you feel, Papa? It's crazy. Speak into your fucking mic. That's crazy. That's crazy. Wild. Girl, I can't with you. Have you ever considered...
Doing a spell on anybody? No, I am not a witch and I will never claim to be a witch. How do you know that I didn't put a spell on you? I don't know that. I would never do spell on you, Papa. I know. You're too cute to see. I don't think a spell would work on me anyways. What do you mean? I mean, I feel like I'm pretty headstrong myself that I would not fall under a spell.
Period. Your head said, I'm strong. Please keep that away. Exactly. Period. How would you feel if someone did a love spell on you? How would you even know if someone did a love spell on you? I guess I wouldn't know. Period. All right, Papa, would you like to read the next story? Yes. From Anonymous. This is my spooky dating story. When I was in college, I was also a working student in a fast food chain.
I used to work at night since my classes for morning. One of my classmates is courting me at this time and he used to wait for me after my night shift. So she's
She can walk with me until I ride the Jeep to come home. One night when I go out for my usual night shift at 11 p.m., I expected him to be outside the store where I work, but he's not there. So I stand and wait and try to text him, but my phone died. So I said to myself that I'll wait for five minutes and I will leave even if he doesn't show up. While waiting, I saw a man's figure on the dark side of the abandoned establishment nearby.
It was the same height as him and the same build, so I walked to see if it was him. As I was three to four feet away from him, I noticed that it's not the guy who's courting me. It was a man and he was crying. I can't see his face, but I hear the sobbing sounds from him.
I step back because I was afraid to approach a stranger in the middle of the night. One step back and I hear him say, I don't know. You're going to have to read that part. I hear him say, I'm having a hard time because I've been here for a long time. Basically is what he's saying. His voice is trembling. I was so afraid at this time, but I replied,
Just go home, brother. The night was deep. Then I walked as fast as I could to the Jeep station. In the morning, I receive a phone call from the man who's courting me. I'm so sorry I fell asleep. Did you hear about the news? There's a man found in the abandoned building near your workplace who was almost decaying. The theory is he's been dead for three days. I was so afraid to talk and had a bad fever that day, so I called out from work and school.
To this day, it was nine years ago, and I still think about it when I fall asleep. Papa, do you see my thigh right now? I have chicken fucking skin. Oh my God. Ew. I need to exfoliate.
Sorry. Wait, that was actually spooky. That was kind of creepy. I don't really know how to feel about that. And I love the fact that it happened in the Philippines. Would you ever talk to a ghost? Well, there was another word right there. I just couldn't read it. I skipped over it. Umuwi ka na. Can you read that for us?
Would you like to read that Filipino word? Period. It's giving very much go home. It's already night. Oh my gosh. Did you ever hear about the fact that I think 12 out of the 200 people that you meet in the street are ghosts?
What? I've never heard that. It's true. Well, let me fact check that real quick. 12 of 200 people. I've heard that there's a one out of like 10 chance you're walking by like a sociopath. You walk by a sociopath or something? Period. What about a sociopath? Yeah. Or a psychopath, whatever. Period. Sorry, y'all. I lied to you. I fact checked. It says two out of 200 people that you meet in the street could be a ghost.
That is crazy to me. Spirits are crazy to me. Period. Would you ever talk to a ghost? Like if you... Like what are you talking about? Like my ancestors or like... Well, no. I guess in this case, like this girl saw a ghost. Well, not a ghost. This girl saw a man, a figure, and was like, I've been here for so long. He's been there for so long. I don't even think I would even find the words. No, I would talk. But if he doesn't talk back, I just...
Bye. That gave me the heebie-jeebies. Even though it might not feel like it in Hawaii, pho is most definitely in full swing, especially in this household. My house always smells like pho, especially with everything that Kat, my assistant, has been cooking every weekend. We have Friendsgiving lined up, we have actual Thanksgiving lined up, and we just have a bunch of game nights lined up where we cook and host.
All the time. The past couple weeks, my house literally smelled like fall because of everything that Kat has been making. We have Friendsgiving, we have actual Thanksgiving, and we have game night every weekend. So my house definitely always smells like fall with everything that we're baking. Kat being the baker that she is, one of the first things Kat requested for me when she first started working for me are new kitchenware. If you're looking to upgrade your kitchen like I did, well, because Kat made me,
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Story number four, anonymous. So this story is about a girl who my brother dated at the time. To be honest, I didn't like my brother's girlfriend. In an effort to get brownie points, my brother's girlfriend, who we will name Nikki, had a sleepover, invited my cousin and I. Nikki rented an old house with two other girls. My brother drove us to the house and dropped us off. It was my first time visiting the hour and the hour of the house just gave me off bad vibes.
The house was very old and small. The house was built in the 50s. All the lights were dim and it seemed like the lights hadn't changed in forever. In the entrance of the house, there was this old grandfather clock.
Nikki said that it was already there when they first moved into the house. Once we settled in, Nikki introduced us to her housemates. It was a chill night. Not much to talk about, so we all knocked out. But in the late evening, I had to use the bathroom. Everyone was still asleep, so I tried to be quiet as possible. I still remember how creepy the house felt as I walked into the bathroom. It was a California hot summer, but that evening felt cold. Girl, I
I kid you not. When I sat on the toilet, I started to hear a music box. The crazy thing was it sounded like someone was holding the music box up to my left ear. That's how freaking loud it sounded. What was even scarier was that I didn't recognize the melody. To clarify, I grew up in a Filipino household that was obsessed with music. We know how to name that tune.
But nothing about that music box sounded familiar. Frantic, I opened the shower curtain and nothing was there. Girl! I don't want to read. I feel like it's going to get scary. There was nothing on the left side of the wall, just the toilet paper hanging. I thought I was dreaming and I pinched myself to see if it was real. The music box sound continued to play right by the toilet.
Oh my god.
I asked them about the old grandfather clock. I thought maybe the music came from it, but they all said the old clock never worked. It was too old to fix and too big to throw out. I knew that house was cursed. That was the last time I visited. All of them moved out a couple weeks after. My brother and his girlfriend ended up breaking up too. It probably cursed the relationship to be honest.
okay, I really thought that the grandfather clock was foreshadowing to something. Maybe that is where the music was coming from. But for it to not even have a role in this story, I'm like, girl, you really built that up and you should write a story. You should be writing books, bitch, because the way you built that up to seem like
Like the grandfather clock was the one making the music. You ate, but it didn't. And I love that too. What did you think of that story? Yeah, it was pretty, it had a lot of potential. Yeah.
But it didn't necessarily. You know what creepy, what is the creepy music that always creeps you out? The song, I think it's like Insidious, where it's like. I can think of a couple like TikTok noises that are like creepy. Yeah, the one that's like. Tiptoe through the window, by the window, where are you all at?
That one? Yeah. I saw the guy who sings it too and he looks... Girl, I love him. He looks... I love like a vampire fantasy. You know what song used to creep me out when I was a kid? I don't know why. Don't ask me why. It's not creepy anymore, but...
The song that's like, why do birds suddenly appear every time? I've never heard that song in my life. Okay. Well, maybe that was the melody that was playing in his left ear. Why do birds suddenly appear every time?
That was actually pretty good. I know. Thank you so much. All right, Papa. Story number five would axle. Hit me. All right. I've never been a fan of online dating, but after years of failed relationships and constant nudging from friends, I finally gave in. One rainy Friday night in July, I matched with a guy. I'd rather not mention his name now for reasons that'll become clear, but let's just call him A.
His profile was striking, dark, sharp eyes, and a smile that should have felt warm but didn't. Am I A? There was something unsettling about him from the start, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. His bio mentioned something about fate, which I normally would have rolled my eyes at. But maybe I was just tired of swiping. I swiped right. We started messaging immediately. He was smart, interesting, but vague when I asked about his personal life.
It felt like he always turned the conversation back to me. At first, I didn't think too much of it. We talked for a few days, and by the end of the week, we had plans to meet in person. He suggested a small cafe in Makati I'd never been to.
A Wednesday evening, 7 p.m. I showed up early, feeling that mix of nerves and excitement you get before a first date. The cafe was quiet, barely anyone around except for a couple in the corner and the barista scrolling through her phone. The air was thick with the smell of coffee. He arrived right on time. I wish I could say that the feeling of unease I had online disappeared when I saw him in person, but it didn't.
If anything, it grew. He looked exactly like his pictures, sharp, handsome, but something about his smile. It just didn't reach his eyes. Oh, fuck no.
I couldn't shake the feeling that he was looking through me rather than at me. We ordered coffee and made small talk. At first, it was a typical conversation. Work, favorite books, places we'd like to travel. But then as time went on, his questions started to get more personal. Too personal.
He asked about my daily routine when I got off work, what time I usually got home, whether I lived alone. I brushed it off as awkward first date nerves, but something about it put me on edge. I tried to steer the conversation back to neutral topics, but he kept pulling it back to me. My likes, my habits. I could feel his eyes on me the whole time, like he was studying me, cataloging every answer. It felt like a conversation meant to make me feel close to him.
but it did the opposite. We sat there for about an hour and by 8.15, I was ready to leave. I gave a polite excuse mentioning I had to get up early for work the next day.
He insisted on walking me to my car, which felt unnecessary, but I didn't want to be rude. So we left the cafe and headed to the parking lot. The walk was quiet, but not in a comforting way. The streets were damp from the rain earlier, and the dim streetlights cast long shadows on the sidewalk and walked a little too close, his hand brushing mine more than once. My heart was pounding in my chest, but not from excitement.
I was anxious on edge, counting steps until we reached my car. We got to my car, I thanked him and quickly tried to end the night. But before I could get in, he stepped closer, a little too close for comfort. There was something about the way he looked at me, like he already knew me better than he should. Like this wasn't our first time meeting. That night, I couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong. I locked my doors, double checked the windows and tried to forget about it. But sleep didn't come easy.
The next day, I decided not to respond to his follow-up message. I told myself it was just an awkward first date, but deep down, I knew that that wasn't it. Then, a week later, I noticed something strange. Little things like items in my apartment not being where I left them. My phone charger wouldn't be on the opposite side of the room or my keys would be on the hook where I always hung them.
At first, I thought I was just being forgetful. And as the days passed, I started to get the same feeling I had on the date, like I was being watched. One night around midnight, I heard a noise from my living room. It was subtle, just a faint creak of the floorboards. I brushed it off as the building settled. But then I heard it again, closer this time. My heart raced as I lay there, trying to convince myself it was nothing. But the feeling of being watched never left.
I can't explain it, but I started to feel anew more about me than he should. Like the questions he asked on our date weren't just to make conversation. They were to figure out how to get in my life, how to be in my space. It's been months now, and I still can't shake the feeling that someone's watching me. I haven't seen or heard from him since, but sometimes late at night, I still hear those soft creaks in my apartment. I lock my doors. I check my windows. But deep down, I know something's wrong. He's in the walls.
So a stalker slash sociopath. Sociopath. Oh my God. Girl, I keep getting goosebumps. Well, you probably have, but you're wearing tights. I don't have goosebumps. That was creepy. That was creepy.
It was wild. Be careful who you go on dates with, y'all. And honestly, trust your instincts. Like, bitch, if the red flag is on, just... Also, I don't know why, but...
I feel like, have you met people like that before? Like when you, when she was describing some, like how his smile. Yeah. When she was describing a smile and eyes, I could picture somebody. I could picture it like that. I've met so many people like that where I'm just like, is anybody home? And not because you're, you look dumb, but like, there's not a soul in between those eyes. I've definitely met people like that before. Have you met people like that before? Yeah. I would have went and used the restroom and just disappeared.
Girl, but you don't know people, girl. But I know how they're, like, if they're creeping me out or not. And my intuition's pretty good, so. Period. You do have good intuitions. I don't fuck around. What if in the first date, in our first date, I was like that? Well, bye, Felicia. Like that. Or, wait, how do they smirk like that? Well, good thing we did not have that experience. Period. But.
I can't say I've ever had an experience like that actually. Like experience as in you've never gone on a date with somebody creepy? No. Or just creepy in general? No. That I thought would give me sociopath or stalker vibes? No. Period. And I would call the police immediately. I feel like, first of all, girl, move out. Second of all, yeah, I would get a dog.
I can't be... Like, my brother was like, my brother was like, I love that you have six dogs because I feel like I... It gives my family, like, a sense of reassurance that I have six dogs. I guess, like, even my mom was like, I love that you have six dogs because I know you're safe. My dogs will kill and murder a bitch. And I'm also very protective, so... On the weekends. Fuck around and find out. Okay, period. Wait until our February episode.
All right, y'all. I hope you guys enjoyed that little story spooky-ooky time with us. Let's turn on the lights, shall we? And on the third day...
Papa, how did you feel about those spooky-ooky stories? There was a lot of, they built up a lot. Yeah. The ending wasn't, there was not an ending that was just like mind-blowing or anything. I don't know. Nothing actually ever happened. It was just a lot of suspense, I think. Yeah, which I love. I was going to say, you guys should be writers, bitch. Especially the first, the two Filipino stories you read were,
Y'all need to write up some motherfucking stories because bitch, those eight. What was yours? The scariest one that we read?
Probably the last one that I just read because of the suspense in it. And it felt like somebody... I felt like I was being watched as I read it. Ooh, I like that. No, I kept looking out the window because I have this window open right now and it's just giving me... Just the description of somebody's smile on their eyes. I could think of multiple faces right now that I've just got... Like give me like kind of just a weird feeling. The scariest one for me is the lady talking to...
her potential date that it wasn't and it turned out to be the i guess the spirit of somebody that had passed there a couple days earlier and him being like i've been here for so long and they only found their body yeah that creeps me out but i will say i i would agree with you with the last one because to my point of whenever people ask me if i'm scared of ghosts i'm really not scared of them
I'm spooked by them, yes. I'm more scared of real fucking people. And I think that's why that is what makes that story scary. I really just don't like the thought or like the feeling of being watched. So that just doesn't sit right with me at all. I like to watch you.
Well, I'm talking about like when I'm alone and I feel like, like if I'm in the middle of the night, I don't know, I feel eyes on me or something. That's no, that. I wouldn't even know how to shake that feeling off. Yeah. Anyways, let's talk about something more light and cheerful. Do you, okay. I was going to ask, do you know what?
time it is. You obviously don't because you don't watch my podcast. But Papa, at the end of every podcast, I talk about my favorite products of the week, things that I've been loving. Would you like to start with your product of the week? My product of the week is Pure Protein, Costco. Papa, can you sit better? Like, can you sit like...
You are literally sitting like a child. Pure protein. Costco. That's how you keep muscles. Period. What flavor? Chocolate chip. I like the peanut butter one more though. The chocolate peanut butter one? Period. Girl, you really go through that so fast. I don't even know how the hell you eat. You eat like four of those a day. That's how I keep these broad shoulders. Okay, girl.
You're such a boy. Anyways, let's talk about girly pop things. All right, y'all. I'm going to talk about my favorite LED mask. You guys have seen me probably wear this
In so many of my Instagram stories, it's giving jabberwockies. It is from the brand Desi, D-E-E-S-S-E Pro. This is a Desi Pro LED mask. It was recommended to me by my esthetician. Shout out to you, Miss Jackie. Not only does she have everybody putting yogurt on their face, she also got me putting LED masks all over my face.
Papa, would you like to tell them what your favorite light setting is? We both use this. Oh, I like the mode number five, the anti-aging. The anti-aging. He likes the red light. I like mode number four. I think it's the blue one, which is calm. Yeah, it's just regular LED light. I like to use this after I use a face mask just to like calm my face down. How often do you use this, Papa?
I try to use it once a week, but sometimes maybe like once every two weeks. Yeah. I feel like every time you're over, you use it at least once. Yeah, I try to like once every weekend when I'm here. I personally like to use this two to three times a week. But all right, Papa, did you have fun in your first podcast filming?
Yeah, it was pretty fun. It's pretty easy, actually. Hopefully they like you enough to have you back. If y'all want justice back, let me know. And if you don't want justice back, let me know as well. I would not take it personally, honestly. Would you take it personally? No. If they're like, bitch, don't have this back. I'm just kidding. I'm pretty sure they love you. I hope so.
Do you have any words for them? Thanks for having me. Period. Thank you for coming, Papa. Where can they find you? You can find me on Instagram at justicesking.
Or... TikTok, Justice Fester. Period. And like me, you guys can find me everywhere. Everything, everywhere, all at once at Bretman Rock. Make sure you guys follow The Baddest Radio for more bad bitch episodes. Of course, give it a rate, a like, a thumbs up. Whatever you want to do. I love you guys and I will see you guys on next week's video. Aloha!
Bye, beach. I'll see you next Thursday. Yeah. Don't forget to follow, rate, and like. You can follow me at BretmanRock on everything and follow the podcast at The Baddest Radio on all social media. Bye, beach. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.