Melanie Hutsell
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Yes, I have actually stayed at Airbnbs from time to time. And truth be told, I do really like them. I'm being totally honest right now that I've had great experiences with them. Yeah. I mean, you can have your look at you go get your own place, get your own pool, your own living room. You're not going to walk in an elevator. You're not going to see people when you're walking around in your undergarments. Yeah.

Yes. And if you don't understand what we're talking about, you should go online. What we're saying is you have a house with a kitchen and a bathroom and it's just for you, tailored for you. You liked your Airbnb over a hotel. Yes. And I do think I've had relatives stay nearby and sometimes it's very nice for them to do an Airbnb and have a little house and they're not underfoot. The last thing you want is your house guest to say, excuse me, um,

Where would I find a towel? That's a toughie when it's- Because they're naked? Well, it's like the 1800 time you say, on the towel rack. Yeah. Thank you. Oh, I was going to look there. People don't even think hotels sometimes just go, hey, I'll go there. I'll get an Airbnb. So you won't regret it. Dana, you take this one. I got to take this call. Yeah, go ahead. Melanie Hudson.

Yeah. Oh, okay. This is what it's come to. A million Deutschmarks? Yeah. 200 episodes. Put it in cash. And now he's just, yeah. And I'm going to, that thing we talked about the other day, I want in. I'll give you 5%. What? Anyway, can I talk about our friend Melanie Hutzel? Yes. Melanie Hutzel,

A great cast member of SNL, 91 and 94. I overlapped with her for a couple years, David for three years. She was a powerhouse sketch performer on that show. And she's Southern-ish.

And charming. Very likable. Very likable. She was in the show. She still is. We talked about the Oh My God sketch she used to do. Delta, Delta, Delta. Remember that sketch? She did that. First of all, two things. One is her journey to how she got on the show is very charming and interesting. And her relationship with Lauren at that time. We'll talk about that. And then we broke down. We broke down my favorite. Yeah. One of my phrases was,

Her epic sketch that she shepherded, she wrote was the Partridge family. Versus the Brady Bunch. Versus the Brady Bunch. It was huge. And how she got that mounted. Who did you play in that? One of my favorite ones ever. I was on the drums and I was not happy. Were you then, which? I was Chris. I was David Cassidy. I was Chris Partridge who...

I don't know if he's in the credits. He was a fucking, basically a day player. They didn't use him. He'd be running around scenes with no lines. And then they go, Spade, you play him. Get in the drums and we'll make sure Sandler and Farley. And Sandler was in it. Yeah, and you all block me. Farley was Ruben Kincaid. We had Farley. It was like 12 people in this sketch. We go moment to moment. I played David Cassidy in case I didn't get that out. It was great. It was fun. So let's roll. Join Melanie Hutzel.

Melanie Hutzel is here. We've got our technical issues out of the way, believe it or not. Melanie, are you a morning DJ? She's surrounded by keyboards. That's what it looks like. She's got four microphones and three pianos. Yeah, my husband and I, we like to jam, you know, just for fun.

That's recreation. No, my husband is a composer. And so we have our he has his little studio down here. Sexy. I know. Isn't it crazy? No, we do. This used to be our kids playroom and it's now his studio. This is where I do my fun self tape auditions. Hello, Melanie. Sag after. Yeah.

Exactly. So a lot happens. A lot happens in this room. Isn't it nice? You have some V drums in the background. I see virtual drums. Yeah. Would you like to buy them? I already made a bid through Greg Holtzman. I actually made a bid on them. It's a whole Wi-Fi thing. I know your address.

No, no, no. I have a keyboard in my house, but I play like a little kid and guitars. And I do that. I do that stuff. I know what you do, Dana. Chopping broccoli. Oh my God. You said it before I said it. She chop, she chop, she chop. That was literally one of my most favorite

sketches ever along with most of the rest of the world, right? I... Chopper. It was so dumb. Just naive commitment. It's either really stupid or really clever. It's like the whole idea you can't get it out of your head. Is it different every time? Like, she chopper.

Oh, by this point, if I'm doing stand up and they yell for it at the end, I have the guitar. It's 10 minutes. I mean, it just goes. It's like 20 minutes of just. I love that. I love that.

So Melanie Hutzel and I and David actually shared the Saturday Night Live stage from 90 or 91 to 90. I left 93, but I was there three years with Melanie, David, maybe four. And I watched I'll just cut to one of my favorite things you've done. And I watched it this morning, which was the I looked at it today and I go, that is a perfect sketch. Wow.

Some sketches are like, okay, I can't imagine it being better for what it was trying to do. And it is written by Melanie Hutzel and whoever else. Wow. Brady Bunch versus the Partridge family. Susan Day was the host. Wow. Yeah. No, that was a lot of fun.

Yeah. And that was a lot of fun. Tell us how you conceived that. David was on drums. We were in the Parchman family band and I was David Cassidy with a guitar. So tell us how that came about.

that sketch. And also real quick, Chris Farley was Ruben Kincaid, which was one of my favorite moments. And he grabbed and kissed Julia Sweeney aggressively. Right. At one point, you know, Chris, he would tend to commit. Yes. Yeah. Just a little bit. Well, you know, Jan Brady was one of the characters that I came to the show with. And Marcy Klein was,

Absolutely obsessed with the Brady Bunch. So I had that going in my favor. Marcy, Marcy, Marcy. Marcy, Marcy, Marcy. And so I remember that that week, you know, Susan Day was coming. And so.

There was all kinds of talk around the office, and I knew I needed to produce and come up with something cool. And I remember Marcy Klein just kind of like showed up in the hallway, just at some weird moment. She just appeared and she was like, Melanie, as you know, Susan Day is our host this week. And she

We're expecting a lot and you need to get it done. Jesus. People don't know because we're supposed to do this. You know, it's like radio DJs. Melanie was famous for doing Jan Brady and toured with the Brady Bunch. You know, you were that was your tour after or before. Yeah. But kind of before, during and after ish. Yeah. But yeah, I mean, I you know, I say that about Marcy Klein, but

The truth is she was a huge part of me getting on the show. So thank you, Marcy. We love Marcy. She was the den mother, the psychiatrist, the go-to person, the hand holder of the guest host. I mean, she was like a big, big presence in those years.

Oh, absolutely. So who cracked the code of like Brady Bunch versus Partridge Family? It's kind of sitting there. It's just you need to put the pieces together. Well, you're the Brady Bunch and then Susan Day came in. Susan Day comes along and then Marcy says her thing. And thankfully, you know, sometimes...

Some people, I think, would probably... I don't know. I could have just froze up at that point, but it felt good for me to have somebody kind of lay it out like this is what is expected and whatever. And so...

When I was growing up, I used to watch the Partridge family and the Brady Bunch back to back, just like we all just like you do, just like we all did. And in my young little, however old mind watching those shows, I would kind of get the character. They were the two shows were so much alike that.

I would get the characters mixed up. And I also had this fantasy that they lived on the same street and knew each other. I had a fantasy about Susan Day, too. I don't think it was exactly that. My wife loved David Cassidy. I mean, literally. It was unreal. But Danny Bonducci was doing those like wisecracker lines. I thought it was so hilarious. So hilarious. And so I.

I just decided at first it was going to be some kind of like dream sequence. And then it just kind of like went from there and became the battle of the bands. Like it just made the most sense. And also it was like, you know, I was so excited to do a sketch that included so many people.

Like almost the whole cast, I think. That's always sort of a home run to be like, they love it when the big casting, they put it early in the show. Half the fun of that is probably, you know, you walk over to Devin's

you know, you go to offices and go, Hey Farley, do you want to play Ruben Kincaid? He's like, yeah. And then you get to go put everyone in. And it's like, you feel like such a big deal for a week. Cause you're, and then if people don't know, if you're listening and you don't know the, you're sort of your own director, whether you like it or not. So,

They have you watching a sketch and you're like, I'm watching the sketch rehearse. I don't know one fucking thing I'm supposed to do. I, they go, you direct it. Yeah. Yeah. You're the director. You're in charge of the choreography, pretty much everything. Yeah. You go meet music and then you go meet with the set design and you go to say, they tell you what. Yeah. Can I just say one thing about watching it today based on that is just,

I didn't realize until watching it today how funny those songs were and so catchy. But you had us all in the costumes. I had a funny wig on. It's always funny right there. I'm saying I'm not a doo-doo. And we're all smiling and it really just made me laugh. And so that starts a sketch off with so much energy, like a band lip syncing with music. Funny look. David's going to the drums.

Yes. And then you guys come in. It's almost like West Side Story throwing it down. And Nealon had this funny wig. This is height. And you had all the Brady's there. What was Sandler's character in that? Because he had a. Adam Sandler was Peter Brady with with the voice actor.

And it's time to change. And he was he was so great. He was you guys were everybody was great. But I have to say, coming from the Annoyance Theater in Chicago to Saturday Night Live, like the biggest difference I learned that week is that guess what?

Not a lot of rehearsal. You know, like from the background that I had come from, we would, you know, for a performance like that, we would rehearse for weeks and weeks and weeks. And it was just like, you know, we blocked it.

And then, you know, Saturday you do the thing. By the way, blocking doesn't even fucking count. Like when you're blocking it, you're just going in, there's tape on the floor and there goes, everyone's just like, it's a dead zone. Everyone just meandering around eating potato chips. You're like, okay, there'll be a couch there. That's where tape is. Your drums will be over here. And everyone just staring off into space. You're like, okay, we got it. But that doesn't really count as getting it all the smoothness. That is that dead zone between Wednesday read through and,

I guess you got it read. Everyone's tired. It's going to be on, right, Melanie? Yeah, exactly. It's on. And then you're probably getting notes to whatever trims or little things. And also you're going into producer mode. You know that he needs a wig, we need a guitar, and you have people helping you, but you're driving it. Yeah. And then, like, to David's point, you run it Thursday with no, just kind of on a floor. The first two times the crew kind of chuckles.

And by like the seventh or eighth time of just running it, it just feels dead. And then when and then Friday you do it again with a little more cameras. Maybe if you're lucky and no one's laughing and it feels even more dead. And then by Saturday afternoon, it's all getting the costumes on and trying to do this rushed thing.

And so by the time you get to the dress show, the practice show, full tilt. Yes. You feel like this is a, we don't have any chance. And then finally you have a fresh audience. Yes. Yeah. I always need one more day, one more rehearse. Cause by the, I I've been on air going, I can't, I don't even know where I'm supposed to go. What's happening. You know,

I don't even know my character. I did see, not to jump away, but I saw one with us just now was Delta, Delta, Delta, and with Woody Harrelson. And I walk into a scene with Woody and I literally drill a hole in the ground with my eyes to look for my mark. It was so unprofessional and embarrassing. That's all I saw. I go, what am I doing? Am I looking for my mark? And I hate when people do that in movies. They walk into a scene, look down, then look back up. I go, all right, you're on your mark. I'm on my mark.

But but I got scared because I said, oh, my God, I just did it. It really it took me. I watched that that one, too, this morning. I did a deep Melanie Hutzel dive. And I thought that was part of your character. Kind of just looking down, like being kind of seductive. You made it work for the sketch. Remember when I go, maybe we could get your books, get those exam notes. And I go, let's meet up later on. Seriously, I mean, you can maybe. I'm sure. Yeah, I remember that.

That's so funny. No, but literally. Yeah, go ahead. I just want to finish off your what happened with you with. No, I was just listening. You listening to you run through like what happens in the process of all that. And I'm like starting to have a panic attack. Oh, yeah. Sorry. I don't know. Me along with Sarah Silverman. And I think Jay Moore started having panic attacks during Saturday Night Live. He does have panic attacks. That's right. And you should have been having them, too.

Everyone should have a panic attack. If you literally get a handle on what you're doing and how under rehearsed you are and then you've got that many people watching it. No, it's live theater on drugs. It's more normal to have a panic attack. If you don't have one, something's wrong. Jay Moore told me, he goes, Spade, I go, he came on, I didn't know him well, but I said, it is tricky and maybe the first couple read-throughs you just get in your legs and

Even if you have good sketches, sometimes, you know, they don't always get on and it feels unfair. And he goes, I know the whole drill, dude. I've heard all the stories I got. I go, OK. I go, I just had a tough time with it, you know.

And then he goes, first thing is he had a sketch kind of high and read through, I think. And then it did pretty well. You know, it was sort of like a toss up and it didn't get on. And he goes, that's OK. That's how it works here. And then two shows later, he had happened again. And then the third show goes, what the fuck is going on? I think fucking kill. And I go, here we go. And then by the fourth one, he had a panic attack.

Well, it's a little quicker than normal, but yes, we all do. You're not feeling any different than anyone. Well, what happens is you're on the show a lot on one Saturday. The next Saturday, you're not in it much. And then you have well-intended friends on the phone saying they fucked you, man. Yeah, you're the funniest one.

I wanted to see more of you. I was not seeing enough of you. And it's just like, oh, yeah. Nothing that you're saying is helping. One time Lauren brought me in. He goes, and I'm sure he's done this to every cast member. He's sitting there opening his, you know, lifesavers. He goes, you know, David, everyone's going to tell you the funniest one in the show. You're not.

And I go, the first half, I go, they are saying that. And then I go, oh. He told me that story as well, but it was about you. Dana, everyone's going to say David. They set me up. David D. But I want it, Mellie, I want it just because that sketch killed so hard, uh,

And you let it, how did you feel like, did you, like when you're on the air show and it's happening, like from your point of view, during the air, was it like, okay, this is in its own way peaking right now? Because that is a great feeling when you know it's gone well. How did you feel personally? It's funny that you bring that particular sketch up because that was definitely like my favorite sketch that I did on Saturday Night Live. It was my favorite moments on the show.

But at the same time, I couldn't feel my body. It was very surreal, very like out of body experience because, you know, it's like I've been playing to a 99 seat theater in Chicago called the Annoyance Theater, which, you know, I was one of the co-founding members of that theater. And, you know, and you felt like a rock star because it was 100 people in this tiny little room.

And then all of a sudden you're on national television. You think it can't get any bigger and then it gets a hundred times bigger. And, but the other crazy thing is you go to the wrap party and you're flying on cloud 10. And then the next day they're like, all right, Tom Hanks. So what do you got? And you're like, is it over already? Like nobody, start over. What do you got? And he goes, Melanie, you didn't write anything. Why not? You go, fuck. I'm still riding my high from last week.

Melody, did you like because you have an entrance in this sketch. Are you behind the slat? Are you in character kind of like talking to yourself as Jan Brady? Oh, my God. You know, are you like like doing it? And then you walk into the scene and try not to think too much. I mean, how do you do that? Because I'll sometimes try to like talk to myself under my breath during the commercial break, like or something to think to get into SNL. Oh, oh, oh, oh.

Yeah. Or are you like Melanie? And then I'll see you in a second. Go out. Are you kind of like just trying to just be Jan Brady or you just. Oh, no, I was definitely in character leading up to that sketch. To be honest with you, I can't remember if I had anything else to do in that show. It was possibly like the only thing. But this is like so random and weird. But.

So I had the Jan Brady wig, the little ringlet curls in the front. That was my actual hair. And so me doing those curls myself was always a huge sort of crossover from Melanie Hustle to Jan Brady.

It's like the weirdest thing ever. But also when you're waiting to go in, we've done that with sketches or I have a, you're waiting to go in, you're trying to think of it, but it's almost better to be light on those weeks because you're thinking of, you're watching the sketch and you're probably going, all right, his spade, he's got a line. Okay. Dana's good. Okay. So far so good. You almost can't even think like, oh fuck, I have to go walk into this actual sketch on TV in one second.

Yeah, absolutely. And I will say this, I have to hand it to Adam Sandler that just there on the floor, like before sketches and sometimes after sketches, he would often go, you're going to be awesome. Yeah.

You're going to be awesome. You're going to be awesome, kid. You got this, Hutzel. Like, don't worry about it. You're so funny. You're so funny. This is probably a terrible impersonation of Adam. That was pretty good. I don't do Adam. I do Adam's character. I will. You know, Dana, I think we have a connection. We've been friends for a long time. And for this episode of Fly on the Wall, we've partnered with eHarmony.

which isn't us. E harmony is a dating app to find someone you can be yourself with. We are not dating. I want to clarify that, but the connection is what you want in a dating partner. Um, just someone like if you found someone that listened to this podcast, that's somewhat of a connection. And then you sort of build on that. You want someone with some common ground. Yeah, it's not it. Look, if you want to connect romantically over, you know, super fly or fly on the wall, um,

It just makes us happy. You don't want to be watching The Godfather and the person next to you goes, this movie sucks. You want to- So dumb. Yeah. You want to connect on all issues and harmonize in life. Similar sensibility, similar sense of humor, and similar sense of sense. I don't like when they watch The Godfather and they're like, everyone in this movie is so old. I'm like, they're 40.

Watch 2001 Space Odyssey. Too much of this movie is in outer space. I don't like it. When do they land? When do they land? Why is that stupid red light acting so silly? Who's friends with a robot? We know dating isn't easy. That's why we partnered with eHarmony because dating is different on eHarmony. They want you to find someone who gets you, someone you can be comfortable with.

Yeah. I mean, the whole idea is you're going to take a compatibility quiz, helps your personality come out in your profile, which makes all the profiles on eHarmony way more interesting and fun to read. So I think this is the goal of dating sites, and I think eHarmony does it great. It's just finding somebody you're compatible with.

So get started today with a compatibility quiz. So you can find some and you can be yourself with. Get Who Gets You on eHarmony. Sign up today. Can I just tell a quick story about Adam? Just like for a quick minute. Absolutely.

Oh, yeah. Take your time. Take your time. Well, it's just it's such an insane thing. And I don't know if anybody has ever talked about this or if he's ever told this on himself. Oh, but little little little tidbit, little trivia about Adam Sandler was that he I walked into the women's bathroom one time. I like it already. And

There was a dude in the bathroom. I'm calling my attorney. Keep going. Was he taking a dump? Yes. That's where he would hide? That's where he would go. And I was like, because I could see his big old shoes, like his sweatpants. And I was like, oh my God, no. I was like, Adam? And he was like, hello, Adam. And I was like, Adam, gross. Oh my God, what are you doing? It's 51 by me. And so-

did that and then later I called him on and he was like it's cleaner it's cleaner in the girls bathroom yeah that's right funny I know that yeah I think Jeremy Irons did the same thing when he guest hosted no I'm making that up Melanie I have a question for you I'm just using the Lou here for a moment when you when now that you're saying it Susan Day hosting it seems like why and I love Susan Day but why Susan Day then I can't remember

Was she in L.A. Law? I think she was on L.A. Law at that time. And she was the reason Johnny Carson got mad at me because we did a Carson on that show. Oh, Johnny.

I didn't write this part, but apparently Johnny didn't know the Partridge family was off the air. So I understand you're on the Partridge family with David Cassidy. How is that show? You know, and she'd already 15 years ago. So you're so uncool. Don't blame him. Oh, well, anyway, that all goes full circle. Absolutely. And I was going to say, it's like.

It's such an interesting thing about impersonations. It's such a, it's such a fine line of like, it can be the greatest thing in the world, or you can really hurt somebody's feelings. I know. And I, I was not aware of it then. I'm more aware of it now. Like I might hurt that person. Even if you really like the person, like Dana loves Paul McCartney, Dana loves all these people and he does them. And you don't know there's a part, because you have to exaggerate an impression that,

and there's a part of the person that probably gets their feelings hurt, but you think, oh, isn't it cool? I do you. Cause you're really getting all the benefit and the person just looks like an asshole. So. No, totally. Johnny liked it, but he liked the impression, but that particular one, I tweaked him a little bit. And, and that must've felt absolutely like crazy to have Johnny Carson be upset with you. You know what I mean?

You know what, Melanie? Like now that I really think about that, I'm like, I cannot even imagine. And I want to hear your stories too, because that's SNL either running into a host or whatever, just these surreal moments upon moments upon moments. And that would be one of them. Like, really? No. Well, I mean, you know. Just surreal. Yeah, absolutely. And, you know, because of my age at the time, I was playing like,

Pretty much any and every young teenage girl that was on television at the time, one of the being Tori Spelling. Now, and then after I had done SNL, I think for a year, we were doing the Real Eye Brady Bunch here in Los Angeles at the Westwood Playhouse. And she came to see the show.

And like backstage, everybody was like, Tori Spelling is here. And she came up to me after the show and she was like, I love you. I think you're really funny. Like, don't even worry about it. Yeah. So that was good.

And then another particular scenario that I still have, I'm haunted by was impersonate impersonating Mayim Bialik because it was just, there were some things about that that,

Namely, a prosthetic nose. Oh, yeah. Which was so offensive. Fuck, we didn't think twice about that back then. You just wanted to get a big laugh and then you just are like, oh, that's so funny. It works. Then you rarely...

think oh this person when i did that one with owen wilson's nose looking like a dick and uh and then they said you have to change it between dress and air it looks too it's exactly a dick and prosthetics like okay okay and then i was in something else and we had to go deal with this other fire we had to put out and i was walking into the sketch going oh my god we never fixed this before air so it's like 15 seconds i go uh what can i do so i just go out there and do it and um

And I don't know, I think Owen wasn't in love with that impression anyway, because it was like, it was thrown to me. It wasn't one of the ones I do. It's just like, you play him, you know, you do this. I was hosting. I got to know him a little bit through Kevin Nealon before the pandemic and a really nice guy. And I asked him about people doing impressions and he has such an interesting cadence. It's such a, you know, and I said, well, what do you think of people doing it? You know, he's like, well, you know, I really prefer that they wouldn't, you know,

And I'm like, okay. So I don't really do them if he's listening now, Owen. We'd like to have him on the show about hosting the show. But he's such a type. But that's it to your example. I just know him now, so I wouldn't want to hurt him. The thing right now is just how to do Joe Biden because...

If you do it a little too heavy handed, are you making fun of an elder citizen or, you know, that one's a little tricky. That's a good point. And one more thing I'll say about Mayim is that I did sort of hear through the grapevine that, you know, she was a teenager at the time. Even worse. Very different. Yeah. And I heard that, you know, she really got her feelings hurt.

And years and years and years went by. And I'm going to tell the short version of this. Take your time. I love these stories. We have to kill eight and a half hours. No, I really was haunted by it. And I felt terrible. And my husband is Jewish. But we were just dating at the time. We went to a synagogue in Westwood. And I saw her.

And like my heart started pounding and I was like, I got to talk to her. I got to talk to her. And then by the time I got to her, she was already gone. And I was like, oh, dang. And then like another couple of years go by and I actually see her at an audition.

And we were auditioning for the same role. And I can't even remember what that was. But we were sitting on a couch together. And she hadn't looked up from her script. She's studying her lines or whatever. My heart's pounding.

I know. And then finally, I just I was like, Mayim. And she was like, yeah. And she goes, oh, hi. And I was like, hey, I just want to say something to you. And I said, I did an impersonation of you on Saturday Night Live. I was not happy about certain things. And I just want to I want to apologize to you and say that I'm sorry. Like I had tears in my eyes and she looked at me and she was like, I really

I release you. Oh, that's cool. That's funny. I know she was like, I release you. And then she was like, I'm not going to say that. I didn't feel that back then. She said, but, you know, we can let this go. And it was just like so nice. And that's such a that's almost like a Star Wars thing. I wish Johnny had said that to me. I release you. I absolve you.

What? Who are you running with then? Were you with Beth Cahill and Siobhan? Was that sort of your squad? Siobhan Fallon, Beth Cahill. Betty Cahill. She likes to be called Betty now. Betty Cahill. Hi. Betty Cahill. Really? Betty. Yeah. Betty Cahill. Julia Sweeney was in there. Yeah. Julia Sweeney, Beth Cahill, Siobhan Fallon. Yeah. Those were my crew. Ellen Claghorn. Ellen Claghorn. I loved Ellen. I love Ellen now.

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7-15-24 and 9-11-24 and Dell will donate $1.75 for each eligible product within your purchase to ComputerAid capped at $1.2 million total. For details and restrictions, go to dell.com slash deals. When you met Lorne, this is kind of a funny question. Maybe it's got no good answer, but how long did you wait to meet him? So...

When so when I was working at the Annoyance Theater, we were doing the Real Eye Brady Bunch and we were also doing a show called the Miss Vagina Pageant, which was obviously, you know, we were making fun of beauty pageants and the objective, the objectification of women. Is that what they do? Yes.

I'm sorry, what? Is that what those do in those beauty pageants? I guess they do. I never really thought of it that way. Just a little bit, David. But anyway, we had created this hilarious show. It was all women and so much fun. And that's when I sort of developed the sorority character and played Miss Tennessee. And so...

you know, SNL scouts were coming through Chicago and, you know, they always go to the typical places. They go to ImprovOlympic, they go to Second City, but there was an ad in the paper for the show called the Miss Vagina Pageant. And they were like, oh,

a comedy with all women. Let's go see this. Wow, that's cool. They did a deep dive. Okay. Yeah. That sounds like Kismet or something's going on here. Yeah. And so Beth Cahill was in that show. Kate Flattery was in that show. Susan Messing, just so many people. And so over a period of time, like every week for a while, there was a different SNL scout

coming to see the real i brady bunch and the miss vagina pageant and um so then the next thing we know and we you know we're just this tiny theater you know um our artistic director mcnapier was just all about the work and you know uh do you know someone's there we knew that there were scouts yeah we knew that there were scouts and um

So anyway, like this one week. I'm getting nervous just hearing this. I'm nervous and sick. Go ahead, sorry. So this one week, Mick gets a call and we find out that

uh, Lauren Michaels wants to come see the Miss Vagina pageant. And, but he can only come see it on a Wednesday night at midnight. I was about to say Wednesday at 9am. You're like, and he, and he would be bringing his friend Quincy Jones, uh,

Perfect. He brought Cher when I auditioned. He always brings the biggest celebrity so she deals with the pressure. Exactly. Exactly. And so, you know, there was like all this weird talk of like, you know, people just felt weird about

putting on the show at midnight. Like, I don't know. No, it sucks. It's too late. It was just a strange feeling. And then finally, like, it's like, oh, no, we're doing it. We're going to do the midnight show for Lauren. Yeah. And so we got that together. We invited every friend and friend of a friend of a friend to come to this midnight show. And and he was there. He was there in the front row with Quincy Jones watching this

you know, crazy show with all these women. And then from there, we found out that four of us would be going to lunch with Lorne and Mike Shoemaker the next day. Mike Shoemaker. Mike Shroomtaker. Now a producer on Zeth Meyers. Yes. Yeah. And then...

three out of the four were flown to New York. Oh, after the lunch, one fell out. After the lunch. Someone fell out over the lunch. Who ordered too many crab cakes? Yes. Oh, what a drag. And also, she didn't use a napkin. Yeah.

Sorry, go ahead. Wrong for. So I remember after the lunch finding out that Lauren wanted to talk to me and have a conversation. And so we literally walked along Lake Michigan together. And I remember one of the first questions he asked me was, what do your parents do?

He asked me what my mom and dad did. And I was like, I know. And it was, it was, there was something kind of sweet about it, you know? And I was like, well, my dad works at Alcoa aluminum company and my mom is a hairdresser and,

And I was just like, and then I was like, I just want to say right now, I want this more than anything. And if I were to get this job, I would work harder. I mean, I was just like, blah, blah, blah. You literally said that. Oh, wow. I don't think anyone says that. That's a good thing to say. I've never heard of anyone saying that, thinking it, but that's good. That's good you said it. It shows you. Probably it came off so genuine.

It just kind of came out. It just kind of... That's like out of a movie. That's like Norma Rae or something. If I get this job, I'll work harder. I mean, can you remember exactly what you said? Like the phrasing? I'll do Lauren. So what do you think about this show? Do you think you might want to be part of it? Are you okay with being famous? Lauren, if you were to give me this job, I...

I want just please understand. I want this more than anything in the world. And I know you've probably heard that a lot from a lot of other people, but I will, um, I'll work harder than I've ever worked in my whole life. And, and, and you won't. Okay. Then long, long pause. And then Lauren says, well,

Right. We're going to go get some mini tacos at the Four Seasons Bar. It's always a walk, Dana. Lauren goes, come by the BH Hotel, maybe take a walk. I go, okay. And I walk and he goes, this way, we're walking.

And now it starts getting dark. I go, are we fucking lost? He walks so far. I'm like, Lauren, I don't even know if we're in BH anymore. And he's like, this way, take a right. He has the 10,000 step thing going. I was at the Beverly Hills hotel with him, like maybe a couple of years ago and I'm driving off and he goes, I go, where are you going? He's just walking. Well, I haven't gotten my 12 or 10,000 steps, but Lauren is a touchstone like that for all of us as well. The most eccentric, brilliant,

Like there's only one Lorne Michaels. That's why everyone does an impression. Do you have any kind of little bit of impression at all, Melanie? My impression is of your impression. It's just, yeah, it's just very...

you know like once you once you break the code it's just there's a lot of little different ways to do it some people do it very very shy you know yeah others are like it's really like fucking good you know he has a lot of these different rhythms but you know i didn't meet with him every once in a while like uh you know in his office in his office just you two okay yeah just the two of us i you know i often uh

had it in my heart to talk to him about, you know, maybe, maybe the women needed a little more airtime type situation, which was when I really look back on that, like it was, you know, I had a lot of guts. I guess you're, you're, you're so honest. No, I love it. I mean, we're unionizing the women on the show. What?

Yeah.

of when it was a little it was harder it was definitely a subject that we that was brought up a lot i i remember that i remember even we did gap girls there was a i think julia was a little sideways about now they're playing girls when we don't have enough parts and it was like oof i get what she's saying i mean i get it all it was it was you know it's such a tough place because it's every man for himself and everybody wants to be on everyone and if and if every and if

If it's not treated fairly, it's almost...

so much you can do. There's only so much you can do. And it's all up to everybody above us. And it's hard to have a heart-to-heart with Lorne. And it's hard to go to Lorne and say a complaint in quotes or a fix or something you'd love to discuss that's a legitimate problem. And it takes balls to even. But, you know, man or woman, he definitely likes sketches where a lot of people were active. And that's why I just fell into church chat accidentally. But then I had Jan Hooks

doing Tammy Faye Baker, you know, and you love to always have Jan in a sketch cause she's, she's, that's the thing. It's like chemistry between two people is, is, you know, that's, that's golden on a, on a, on a live TV show. And, but it can't be forced. It has to, it has to come organically and, you know, um,

Anyways, I don't know where I was going. Well, who did you connect with the most on the show? Did you and Beth? Beth was there one year. But did you have people that you were kind of like sort of buddies with on the show that you would hang out with the most? Well, I think that was the thing. I mean, you know, I look back on you and Jan Hooks and David, you and Chris Farley and you and all the other guys. You guys had like this chemistry. And so, yeah.

Yes. To answer your question, the people that I had chemistry with were Siobhan and Betty Cahill, Ellen Clegg Horn. And I tried, we tried for years to get a thing, right. To get a thing going. And it just, it's one of our biggest regrets or I wish I should speak for myself. It's one of my biggest regrets is that that never happened. But it wasn't that we didn't try. And, um, um,

So, you know, that's what was interesting about my time on the show was that after that first year, I didn't have Beth and Siobhan anymore and they had left. And so then you're kind of looking to other people, Julia Sweeney and some of the guys. Where do I fit in? Yeah. Where do I fit in? Because there was.

The older set, Dana, sorry. No, you're right. No, we were the veterans. And then I call them the junior varsity, but the new people came in for the first time where you had a cast and then another cast, like, you know, another team ready to go because Lorne didn't want a cast to leave en masse. So he wanted trainees, so to speak. So that was a very intense time to be on Saturday Night Live, I think, in the early 90s because of all that.

I was shadowing Dana like someone at Arby's or something. I was like, I go behind Dana and just watch what he does and go, okay, when you do it, you got to go like this. You go out there and kill. And I'm like, God. When Lauren wanted to mess with me, David's ready anytime. Right. Because David would sit behind me and read through. Yeah. I mean, you're right. It was an interesting time.

And, you know, I always sort of looked to the to the older, you know, all of you guys, you, Dana and and of course, Phil and Kevin Nealon, you know, sort of as like this anchor for the show. You guys were settled and had been around. Well, we had 100 shows under our belt, which is such a hard show to get relaxed to do. You know, Dana, I was watching you on Saturday Night Live when I was in high school.

And then you're there.

And yeah. And in college, like, you know, we did a we did a show at the University of Tennessee called All Night Theater. And my friend Mark Rowe. Oh, I played Tammy Faye Baker. He played Jim Baker at like three o'clock in the morning. And so we were copying you and Jan, which is what the way I would have thought is like Jan. Tammy Faye Baker has a sister that she never met. And then you you have.

dueling Tammy Faye's sketch. Stuff like that. I rebuke you. Do you remember a dumb sketch where you, I don't know why I remember this because it was famous people who sing with their dead relatives and

And you were Tammy Wynette, I think. Yeah. And they go, I'm not dead. And you go, I'm actually not dead. And they go, that's how rumors get started. This is how rumors get started. Yeah, exactly. I remember it because someone, I think Natalie Cole came out with Nat King Cole. Oh, yes. And so we did a whole thing of. And Chris Farley. Who did Chris Farley play? Oh, my God.

It was so funny. Anybody. Anyway. Anyway. That one just stuck out my head because I thought, is there any impression you didn't ever get to do that you wish you got to do? Or is there something that came up years later where you're like, oh, I love this. Or accent or character. Um...

That's a good question. A French chef, an Italian waitress. You could probably do every president since, and that would have been fun. Yeah, go ahead. You know, I always wanted to do, I had all these like Southern characters that I wanted to do that I would bring to the, to the table. Paula Deen. Paula Deen, Paula Deen. Oh, Paula Deen, yes. But I remember there was the sketch of,

I don't remember that much about it, but Steve Korn and I had written it together. Great writer. And it was just called The Country Christmas Show. And I remember that Glenn Close was going to be in it with me. Oh, Glenn Close, yeah. And I remember the song. And this is how it went. Oh, great. Ready? This is how the beginning song went. Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome.

welcome, welcome, welcome to my country Christmas show. Hi, I'm Jenny, Jenny Jean Hutzoff. I love

I literally. Jenny Jean tight jeans. And I just made that up. It's already catchy. Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome. So yes, I remember the song. That's all I remember. We talked to Tom Hanks and he remembered the whole subway surfing song of a sketch we did that I was in and I helped him write. And I did not remember one line from it. And it got cut, right? It got cut. And he sang the whole song. He sang the whole song. Just had some photographic memory. Remember that Dana? I was like, holy shit. Yeah, that was weird.

Isn't it so crazy what you remember and what you don't remember and then what other people will point out to you? It kind of makes me worry about my brain a little bit every once in a while. But I do have a memory about Tom Hanks. When Tom Hanks was on the show and all of this was so obviously...

surreal and weird, like talking to these famous people. Yes. For all of us. Yeah. For all of us. And I remember it was just like, you know, that those weird hours on Tuesday night when everybody's writing their sketches and all stressed out. And he's just kind of like walking from office to office, just having fun, figuring out what everybody's going to be doing. And he was just like, he looked at me and he was just like, man, he goes, you're set.

you're all set. He goes, you're going to do your sorority girl movie. I love it. It's going to be awesome. And you know, like you're, you've got your career and it just come from Adam Sandler's office. So they, they just had this thing of supporting Melanie. I know. And,

And I thought that was so nice of him to say it never happened. But well, he he wanted to be a cast member. He's the least pretentious. I don't know what you would call him superstar. I don't know what you could call him today. I don't know. Megastar. But he just has no pretense about it.

No pretense. And, you know, somebody else that was like that was John Goodman. Oh, yeah. I love he did the show a couple of times within the three years that I was there. And I remember the second time he came around, like he asked me, how's Claudia and Steve doing? That's my mom and dad. And I was like, he remembers my parents names like that.

That's so nice. That's next level. The talent to cold read 50 scripts essentially on Wednesday as a host and certain ones really stood out. I mean, John Goodman would make in the moment changes or, you know, you get just a bare note, but he was, he was a brilliant cold reader. So was Danny DeVito, Hanks. That was Alec Baldwin. Alec Baldwin, which maybe you'll relate to this. I think I've said this before, but Victoria Jackson, uh,

Would because he would host occasionally and she goes, not going to happen this week. I go, what? I'm not going to fall in love with him. I'm not going to fall in love with him.

Okay. And then by Friday she go fell in love with him. Oh yeah. She said she couldn't look at his eyes cause they were so blue. Once I saw them, I was in love. No. Oh, that is okay. I'll, I'll, I'll speak to that. He did. Alec Baldwin came into my office and I, I couldn't talk.

Like he is. I literally couldn't. I felt like he was so good looking and so famous. And yeah, it was like when Sharon Stone was there and all the guys were freaking out and Sharon Stone comes in her slinky dress, comes into your office. Hi. So sweet. Everyone was like, God damn, no one this pretty and famous will ever be in my office.

little room again. And our offices, if people don't know, are so tiny and gross. They're just like a gross couch that's been there since Tim Kazerinsky. And everyone is like sitting on the same couch year after year of year. And they're like, Hey, and they come in there and some people just beam like superstar, you know, and you're like, Holy shit. I did a movie with Anthony Hopkins once and just meeting him in this little room in this haunted hotel with Alan Parker. And he was so intense in that voice. It's like, put a camera on this

But I remember Lorne Michaels, speaking of beauty, Paulina Porizkova came in on my first show just to hang out, I guess. And she was sitting in the read-through and she kind of looked like she had a mask on, you know, and it was fun to ask her, what is it like to be you? But I remember Lorne saying, you can't marry a face, right?

Oh. Eventually, there's like that thing you get used to the face and then you need another face. Ha ha!

But yeah, those people that are so charismatic put a fucking camera on them. I mean, I just feel like there's nothing to me. I'm like paper. I just need a wig or an accent or something. I'm like the invisible man. David has a great voice. He doesn't think I think he does, but. You know, I think you said it twice, so now I believe you, but. You have a voice. Fred Wolf and I talked about that. You have a cool voice, like an interesting voice. Yeah.

You do have a cool and interesting voice. And I think that, you know, when you said that, it kind of makes me think about like the standups, you know, the cast was comprised of standups and then you have the people with the improv background. Right. And David, you did.

you know, stand up. I don't know how long leading up to Saturday Night Live. And then you come on. You'd been out there for several years, several years. And then you have to do characters. Right. But and then, Dana, Dana, you are so amazing at characters and also did stand up. So so I think I don't know. It's something that I've thought about a lot of just like

I feel like a lot of times people who were standups that came to the show had a better ability to sort of like protect themselves and, and look after themselves, you know, to whereas people from an improv background, it's like, we're all in this together. And I'm not, and I'm not saying that standups aren't like team players. Well, look, okay. Finish your thought, but I have a thought about that. Go ahead.

Yeah. I mean, you know, it's like, I, if somebody were watching me on the show,

There's no way that they had any idea who I was as a person because I was always doing a character. Yeah. And David, when you would go on a news update or whatever people, we could see David. Yeah. We could see who you were. I mean, I learned that's why I never thought I'd be on the show because quickly Dana, I just was thinking I barely was doing standup and writing standup and trying to get good at that. I was in the middle. I wasn't even a headliner.

So to go on the show, it's a whole new muscle to learn. I wish I could have taken a year of classes of improv to go, here's how you do it with these people. And here's how you write sketches and get immersed in characters. I think I just resigned myself.

I wasn't going to be as good as Dana and all these guys and Phil. So I said, I like the Bill Murray type, not in any way am I as good as Bill Murray, but he was always a little bit of Bill Murray in his sketches. And I said, I think that's the best I can hope for. I'm sort of a version of myself. And when I had a Hollywood minute, Lauren was like, do that more. Like, I think he knew I wasn't going to be doing crazy characters. He finally said, just be a version of yourself and that will be easier life for you.

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So my only thing to add to this is that when you're coming up through stand-up, the dog-eat-dog world and the survival mechanism of stand-up, the Friday night late show where the middle act is trying to knock you off your pedestal and you got to do an hour to drunk people. It was just, it was, it's an emotionally violent sport.

SNL is in a different way. So you're coming from that thing that I must kill every time, all the time. And there's good and bad that comes with that. It took me, by the time I was doing Carson, I was relaxed. I wasn't pushing. But my standard in my head of the amount of laughs I should get was like that of a stand-up. But I didn't realize until later doing stand-up in small clubs

recently with my sons that I was a sketch player the whole time. There was just no groundlings in San Francisco. All my bits were character driven, which was kind of hard to land, but it good in a small room. But I do feel like the standups have a dog eat dog sort of survival instinct of to kill, uh,

And then we learn to be sketch players and play well with others. You know, you don't ever when you're out there with your friend, you want to you want to play fair, not not undercut or overlap. And, you know, with Hans and Franz, you know, I had my friend there with Mike and I in Wayne's World with Phil and I and Carson Sandler and I doing the Pepper Boy when I hosted. So there was such a high for me.

of getting used to the idea of being in something where someone else is supporting me or when Jan hooks would do her thing and really loving that, you know, but when you're a lone gunslinger, you're like, I got to kill and I got to be, be funnier than the other guy. So that's all I had that. Yeah, absolutely. It's like, you know, when you're, when you're by yourself, you don't have anybody else to blame for not getting the laughs or whatever. Um, and so, um,

Yeah. And the other thing about the stand-ups is like, once you're off the show, you have that to go back to right away and make money. Right? Yes. And you go right back into your craft. And so for me, after I came off of SNL, I went back to...

improv theater and that doesn't pay the bills. Yeah. It's a different check. It's a different, it's a different thing, but I did do that. Uh, when I, when I moved out, of course, I mean, that's what you're good at. And that's what got you where you were. It's like, you got to stay out there and that's a good way to be, to constantly be in front of people.

Absolutely. Absolutely. And I miss it like crazy right now. And I'm hoping to get back into the Corona stuff. You know, no one thought there'd be anything negative about COVID, but there is. There is a couple of things.

Yeah. Yeah. No, I know. Everyone thought it was going to be so great and it wasn't. No, I know. Everybody thought it was going to be great. Melanie. I don't know if, uh, Danny, anything else to add? This is very interesting conversation. Uh, thank you for having it with us. Yeah. I mean, uh, this is, uh, uh, illuminating, you know, I, I love hearing how people navigated that and how honest you were with Lauren in two ways. And I, I would say that, uh,

You were powerful as a performer when you chose to be. I mean, you had a really, you had a lot of commitment and strength. And that room is kind of a rock and roll room because all the ambient noise and stuff. So you do have to like, you know, project everything.

And you had a lot of power and, uh, you were so funny and, uh, it was so very interesting just hearing your journey through that, that land. Well, thank you. Thank you for, for saying that. And thank you both for having me on your, your new podcast. It's, it means a lot to me and it's so, uh, great to see both of you and, and you both meant different things to me at the time when we were kind of like all going through it together. And, um,

Yeah, I mean, you're exactly the way I remembered you as so genuine. She looks exactly the same. Maybe one year younger. First of all, I just wanted to say there's a Dorian Gray thing going on here with with Melanie. But that's OK. The time machine worked perfect. I don't know how you're staying. I think it's so useful. That's very nice. But but you came out very genuine then. I mean, I was in my own kind of surreal world doing Ross Perot and all these things. But I do remember how just genuine you were.

in real you were as a person and there you are. So that's a pleasure. That is so nice. It's a, it's a pleasure to see you guys. And, you know, I miss it. You know, it's like once you do Saturday night, Saturday night live, how do you,

How do you follow that? You know, it's just kind of like it's in your being and your spirit. And it's like the one thing that everybody in the world wants to talk to you about. Right. And, you know, when I think about live TV, you know, there is nothing in the world, not even childbirth, honestly, that will bring you to the present moment in such a way that is so powerful.

powerful. And it's just, you know, the three of us are, we are three of 156 people in the world that were on that show.

I didn't know that statistic on my own. I was listening to Bobby Moyahan was talking to Mayim Bialik on her podcast. And he said that? That's interesting. Well, he actually said, how many of us are there? Like 150? Like, I don't know. And then my husband, Fred, looks it up. Yeah. And so it's like 156 people. Wow, he was a good guess.

You know, so it's just crazy to really think about that. And it's something that I look back on fondly. There were

hard things about it. There were awesome things about it. It was a dream come true. And, uh, I don't know. That's all I really have to say about it. Oh, all positive. Oh, you get what wisdom when you, as you go on and you, you, you substitute any kind of bitterness or, or, or regret with gratitude. Yeah.

How lucky was I to get on that silly show? Yeah. Yeah. That's a good... Yes, I agree with your assessment. But I do... I enjoy when I go back there sometimes and do a guest spot. It's never the same because you kind of see, but it is a one-off experience. So that's... Hence our little podcast, which is fun to hear the human side of this, the effect on people's lives. But anyway...

You've been awesome. We don't know how to wrap things up because we're not professional. It's hard to know how to wrap things up. I'm sorry. We did a good job. Yeah, we did. It's so great to see you both. You too, hon. Be well. I hope we run into each other in LA at some club or some little theater. Sure. Why not? Sounds good. Oh my God. It's Melanie. Oh my God.

This has been a podcast presentation of Cadence 13. Please listen, then rate, review, and follow all episodes. Available now for free wherever you get your podcasts. No joke, folks. Fly on the Wall has been a presentation of Cadence 13, executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade, Chris Corcoran of Cadence 13, and Charlie Finan of Brillstein Entertainment. The show's lead producer is Greg Holtzman with production and engineering support from Serena Regan and Chris Basil of Cadence 13.