Kyle Dunnigan
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Okay, Dana, I just want to tell you quickly for the people listening that before you hear Kyle, he does mention Bud Friedman. A lot of us do. Bud Friedman was a huge influence. He owns the improv, if you don't know, New York, LA. And he passed away since we did Kyle a little bit ago. So I just want to say quickly, Bud was...

you know, I could over talk about it under, I'll just say he was a huge, huge reason. He was like the first Lorne. I think Danny, you said that it was a guy that, you know, if you get into the improv, Mitzi was at the comedy store. She didn't like me, but like me, got me up and I had a great run doing all these clubs working in the LA one. I worked the LA one last week. So a huge thank you. And, uh, a sad day, uh,

About that, but Bud was was a great great and he's great for comedians.

I would just say, you know, the same thing like Lauren, Bud loved comedians, loved us. And he was very nice to me. I couldn't get out of the comedy store either, which was sort of a scary weird place back then. And Bud was friendly. He was old fashioned in a way. As people know, he had a monocle. He had some sort of weird cadence of talking. I don't know where it came from, but take it outside. - Hello, how are you? - But he gave me great spots and he was very encouraging.

And he was somebody he,

He passed away at 90. He looked 60 when he was 40, but when he was 80, he still looked 60. I mean, he didn't age for decades. I would see him from time to time and go, man, he looks exactly the same. Hello, Dana. Stay out of the aisles. Stay out of the hallway. He was like this, with the monocle and that cadence, he was like this gentleman. Yeah. And just a sense of decorum of like, now we're starting the show. Everybody ready? Yeah. You know, you don't see a lot of monocles anymore. I feel like he might be the last guy.

Well, I was there when he had, you know, regular glasses. Really? Yeah. Comedian got mad. It was drunk and punched him. He goes, it doesn't matter. I'll just use this pot. And that's how the, I made that up. And you go, but you never got it fixed. He goes, yeah, the monocle was only Colonel Clink in Hogan's heroes going back to the 1960s. He had a monocle and then, but yeah, but there's no one, no one does a monocle. You know, my, what is my friend is a comedian in Arizona. Mike Sterner says, yeah,

His friend is Japanese optometrist and every December 7th, he attacks the Pearl Vision Center.

There you go. It's not my joke, but I liked it. Hey. I like anything where it's just out of nowhere. That's a good joke. Okay. But Bud, we'll let you listen. God bless you. Bud was great. Laughed at everybody. A comedian. Created an amazing legacy that continues to this day with improv comedy clubs all over. Yeah. Great guy. Great laugher. And anyway, enjoy our podcasts.

Yes. I have actually stayed at Airbnbs from time to time. And truth be told, I do really like them. I'm being totally honest right now that I've had great experiences with them. Yeah. I mean, you can have your, look at, you go get your own place, you get your own pool, you get your own living room. You're not going to walk in an elevator. You're not going to see people when you're walking around in your undergarments. Yeah.

Yes. And if you don't understand what we're talking about, you should go online. What we're saying is you have a house with a kitchen and a bathroom and it's just for you, tailored for you. You liked your Airbnb over a hotel. Yes. And I do think I've had relatives stay nearby and sometimes it's very nice for them to do an Airbnb and have a little house and they're not underfoot. The last thing you want is your house guest to say, excuse me, um,

Where would I find a towel? That's a toughie when it's- Because they're naked? Well, it's like the 1800th time you say, on the towel rack. Yeah. Thank you. Oh, I was going to look there. People don't even think hotels sometimes just go, hey, I'll go there. I'll get an Airbnb. So you won't regret it. Okay, Dana, before I get to Kyle Dunn again, I have to tell you, I have to get a plug in. What? I bought this at the gas station.

And I used to like this. It says mild, right? So I use it twice. I've been tricked. This is an anti-commercial. No, because it's so goddamn spicy. And what, there's mild and there's medium and there's hot. Which one do you think wouldn't be spicy? Mild. And even when I get it, everyone's like, you're the biggest pussy. Why do you have mild? I go, because I just wanted like the idea of it. I don't really want to burn up. And oh my God, I was, my burrito, I was ripping it apart going, what in here? I'm blaming the burrito.

is so hot. It's that. And I look at the back, it says, you know, jalapeno. I see the word jalapeno. That's all I need to see. That's all I need to see. I go, why, why would it be so hot? And this isn't your fault. You have a lot of free time. But I was so mad last night. And then I called Heather and I yelled at her about it. But she agreed. Cholula is the best that's mild. Cholula has to be hot. I'll get you a bottle on the next podcast. No, it can't be anything. It just has to be red,

Food coloring. Well, how about ketchup? Old-fashioned, okay? That's basically it. Give me ketchup with three pieces of an onion in it. Get some Heinz in that mix, all right? Kyle Dunnigan is one of my really good buddies. Kiel Dunnigan. And he's a sweetheart, and...

We, uh, we talked to him because we're talking to more comedians because when I'm out with these comics, especially ones I like, and they're heavily influenced by us. Now they grew up on it. Obviously they love Dana. They like all the people we've been talking to and they share their stories with me.

And some had auditions. Kyle had a big audition for SNL. The seminal audition in 2008, which Bobby Moynihan was at and Nick Kroll and Kyle, his story about his audition process at the time being a brilliant comedian and impressionist, a natural for SNL. And what happens is very dramatic, uh,

But he's organically very, very funny throughout this talk. And some of these talks with these people are just straight up just laughs. You know, we're just talking about SNL. We're talking about he does impressions. He mixes them and Dana does them. And those are the kind, just different type of shows. And that's what this type of show is. So it's, you know, again, just a human story.

about someone trying to get on SNL and what happens. So it's kind of riveting, actually. And then like the before, during, and after, like when you don't get it, what it's like. And we don't have a lot of those because everyone has it. Everyone got it. Yeah, and he landed on his feed. He has a huge YouTube channel with all this massive, hysterical, bizarre content. Instagram. And he's just a fun guy to have dinner with. Yeah, 100%. Here is Kyle Dunnigan. How's Dana's dump going?

Dana was right here. Huh? Dana was right here, and then he just took off. Dana, we're almost done. Damn, I brought a gigantic sombrero, but I... Do you need a hat? No, I don't. It's just for when we do our things. Oh, right. Chuck Beres, you're too young. The gong show? Yeah. Oh, no, I know Chuck Beres, yeah. He would randomly come out with hats and not refer to them. I did like that. Oh, really? So I was doing that.

I saw you in a hat, like a round circle farmer hat. I was like, I need that because the sun's really bad. And then I got one. Fucking pineapple picker hat. I can either spend hours with greasy sunscreen all over or I can put a giant hat on. I prefer the giant hat. Some people go, no, fuck the hat. I'm going to grease it up for hours. I do both.

Kyle Dunn again is our guest today. That's why I want to be a dermatologist. That's because of the way you look. You know, I went to a dermatologist and they looked at a thing and it was... Yeah. Because I thought, this looks not great. Are we recording? Yeah, light it up.

Let it out. Let me tell you a dermatologist story. So what happened? If you can actually focus the podcast on dermatology, it's good when it's about something. It's a good niche. So what happened? We can always cut this. Which means we won't cut it. Yeah. Go ahead. Well, I just looked at like a little mole spot and I was like, that doesn't look good. I went and the guy looked at it and he's like, you're fine. And then this girl came to visit me for like a weekend. I think I told you, David, about this. And it did not work out.

Like she walked into my house. I knew that was coming. Yeah. She walked into my house. No, he always, that's how they always end. I had, yeah, it always ends like that. I had this house and she walks up, she goes, do planes always fly over your house? She immediately just had all these awful things about my house. I never noticed the planes, like, but I'm in the path. Now I, it's constant. There's just planes around. Anyway, she goes, I don't like the look of that mole.

And I was like, I checked it out. I think it's okay. Chew it off, bitch. She's like, I don't think it's dangerous. I just don't like the look of it. Yeah, yeah. It was just a vanity thing. Yeah. So I went back and a different dermatologist was like, that's a problem and cut it out and it had like... Damn. It got caught. It was...

If it wasn't for her, the point of the story. The girl was the problem? Oh, I thought he said cut the girl out of your life. Well, I was naked on a slab, and this guy's going around with the eyeglass. He's like 90 or something. Yeah. And he's going around, and everything he sees, because I'm covered in stuff, he goes, age, age-related. And a woman's writing it down, age-related, age-related. Yeah, I was for a guy, for a half hour. Should you do anything? Nope, age-related. So.

Sick. It's like Billy Bob Thorne age-related. He goes, this doesn't look like much, but you might have to remove it. I go, my wiener? And then he took that monocle off. He goes, oh, I'm sorry. My wiener is the greatest childlike reference to a dick. Actually, Dana, tell him when you went to the masseuse what she said. Oh, I had this masseuse once, and she'd really start digging, and she'd say, give it, give it, give it, give it, give it. Didn't she go by your wiener and go, you hungry?

No, that was me. That was you? Yeah, no, I went to... Irish comedians for a hundred. Is Dunnigan Irish or British? It's Irish. Irish. I eat her. Yeah, so we have the same... I went to a... This is like a longer story, but a Tony Robbins wanted me to perform at his birthday party. I had... Oh, go ahead and tell the story, because why not? This is a great one. Okay, okay, okay. Do you do Tony Robbins? No, I don't. But I tried to get one for the thing. But I was excited, because I...

I like Tony Robbins. I read like three books in my life. - Yeah, "Awaken the-" - Tony Robbins. - Yeah, me too. - So I was excited and I was nervous 'cause they were paying me more money than I've ever been paid for anything.

in my life. - $750. - No, higher. - I turned them down. - No, I know. You gotta pay what it is, but it was more than a thousand dollars. - Tony does not, Tony. - It was $24,000, more than a thousand dollars. - But what do you net? - It was $25,000. - That was great. - Yeah. - That's wonderful. - Well, yeah, so I was very excited. - That's an adorable number.

I know to you guys that's so no money. No, we don't get it. He has his money bags here. Think about where you are and think of who owns this place. No, I know. Cooling this house is $25,000. All right. Tony Robbins tried to beat you up. Got you in a headlock. We'll let you get through this story. Hopefully, we probably won't. I was nervous and I thought, hey, Tony would say, take care of yourself, little buddy. People don't know Tony. He's like nine feet tall. He has actually a tumor in his pituitary gland and it's

pumping out growth hormones. That's why he's so big. He's growing a foot and a half in the last 18 months. Yeah, he's been... When he was a kid, they asked if he wanted to take it out and he was like, no, I want to be enormous. He could have taken it out and he didn't. Is that true? That's a true story. Oh my God. He is a huge man. I want to be enormous.

He worked. It did, yeah. He really stands out. Yeah. He like, I don't know if you see the documentary, but he puts his hand on someone's head and it's like a giant catcher's mitt just envelops the whole guy's head. All right, I'm getting to the- Because you're a bunch of fucking losers. I don't care. I like the whole story. Hey, you little piece of shit. Yeah, he's a therapist that swears. Yeah, he yells, he's scary. Go ahead. I'm getting comfortable. So I was like, I'm going to go take care of myself and get a massage. I never do that. So I went to this place and I don't want a hand job.

I know about the whole hand-job thing. You're not one of those happy ending... Yeah. David's never heard of those. No. Yeah. But the whole point of going there is to feel better about myself, you know? I don't want to walk... Got it. I don't want to have like...

have a handjob. So I'm like, how do I look like I don't want a handjob? So I take off my baseball hat because guys in baseball hats look like they want handjobs. Very suspicious. You know what I mean? So you take off the cap. Yeah. I'm not saying David wants a handjob. No, check. I like it. So I take that off and I kind of go in jolly, you know? Yeah. Rather than kind of like serious looking around. Slinking in. Embarrassed already. Shame. Yeah. Yeah.

And she gives me a good back massage. She flips me over. She starts doing a little tickly on the stomach. I'm like, oh, this is like going down a hand job lane, you know? And so out of nowhere, she taps my penis and she goes, you hungry? Yeah.

And I was like, oh, no, I just ate. The better question is, is she hungry? She seemed hungry. Okay, got it. I didn't ask her. This is important for our listeners. She looked like famished. Yeah. Someone's the meal and someone's the consumer of the meal. Yes, yes. She was drooling. Then she tapped my penis again harder, like four more times. She was like, no, you hungry? Am I breaking your mind?

And I go, oh, no, thank you, thank you. And she goes, oh, girlfriend? And I go, no. And she goes, wife? And I go, no. I know where this one's heading to. Yeah, and she goes...

That's it? She thinks you're on the other team. Yeah, so I walked out there feeling great. I go to the Tony Robbins thing. And beforehand, they did a Zoom call with me where they go, this is what Tony wants. And he wants me to do Biden on a big screen. No one sees me. They just see Biden. But he's going to introduce me as the president of the United States is here. And I was a little worried because that could happen. He could Zoom in the president. He's met all the presidents. So I said to them, I'm a little worried they're going to be disappointed when they see me

And they were just like, this is what Tony wants. This is a cult. You don't tell what, this is what we do. Yeah. I did the same kind of gig. I want to hear about this. I want to hear yours. Because I'm sure yours is better than. No, everything is ringing true to me. Okay. But I love Tony Robbins. Tell when they play, they play like a videotape before. Yes. So,

Well, it was actually two things. A montage, right? Yeah. I'm making this story way too long. No. Not on fly, right? No, we go forever here. I Googled Tony Robbins' birthday on YouTube. I don't think I told you this. Research. And his last birthday was this big extravaganza with all these stars just like, Tony, you're the best. He's bawling, crying. His wife's like, I love you, honey. It was like his 60th or something like that, you know? Yeah.

So I felt even more pressure. This is the next birthday. So I get there and he's like, thanks for doing this, you little hunk of crap. And he whacks me on the back.

and everybody's super jazzed up, but they've been up since like five in the morning, you know, swimming with sharks. She keeps them going. This is a lot of corporate gigs where they beat them to death. They go, here's your entertainment. They're like. Yeah. It's like raw. Go. We can win. They have dancers come out. You probably saw this. After every speaker. Mine was on Zoom. Mine was on Zoom. Oh, see, that was smart.

I was there. I flew down to West Palm Beach. He wanted me to fly there. Undisclosed location. So anyway, so what happens? So yeah, get to the end of the story. No, you know what? I could do Tony Robbins for the first half hour, and then we'll do McCartney for the second half hour. He's at a trampoline, and I jumped on that beforehand trying to get pumped up. Yes.

And so the guy before me was the secretary of defense, former secretary of defense, Larry Sumners. And he just talked like this. He went over an hour and a half. - An economist, yeah. - It's like midnight now.

And Tony goes, are you ready for the surprise of your life? And they're like, yeah. And they're like, have I ever disappointed you? And they're like, no, you would never disappoint us. And then he goes, and then someone goes like, blah, blah. There's a pause. He'd forgot to play the package they made, this minute package video of him with presidents. Oh, okay. So now that plays for like, okay, whatever.

No, he goes, yeah, the President of the United States. I go nuts. Then they play the package. Then he reintroduces me because he introduced me before he did it wrong. But now it really feels like, for sure, the President. Because in the video they said he's shaking hands with Obama. Yeah. So they really think Biden's coming up. Oh, they 100%. Oh, and there's no way he would fuck us over and have some asshole playing Biden. Exactly. So I'm sitting backstage like, oh, no. It's the nightmare I imagined. So then I pop up on the screen and you hear this audible...

And I'm like, hey, it's Tony Bologna's birthday. Come on, man. It's a good guy. Corn pop. Dying. Corn pop. Just death. Nothing. Really? God, that's so unusual. Nothing from them. Because they're angry. Yeah. And I think they don't even know if it's a joke and they're just staring. And in my head, I'm going, this is the funniest thing. And I've got another 25 minutes. You're hoping with your best bit. Yeah. You're like...

This is just going to get worse. And are you in a suit and tie just at a regular mile? That's a whole nother thing. I went shopping. You know, you're nervous. You shop for a new outfit. Oh, before or after the masseuse. I had to go after. You know what I mean? So I bought these new shoes. They were both left feet. So I couldn't even use it. I had dirty shoes. What? Who does that? I'm making this story up.

I'm telling you 10%. This is going to be a bonus podcast probably. If you want, yeah, go to the Patreon. I think it's his own podcast. Yeah. And then I got a shirt. So I looked, it was a black button and I looked like a magician. Yeah. And I made a joke about that. You have clown shoes on and a misfit shirt. I didn't, I wore my dirty shoes and, because I couldn't fit into those two left feet. They go, I like when the magician made all the laughter disappear. Yeah.

Yeah. It's weird because the screen goes up and now I have to introduce myself. And here's a surprise for Tony. Kyle's not here. This is very normal. They're like, this guy's still going? Yeah, yeah. Well, I walk out and they jump up and they're like, yeah.

Because they're all taught to train you. Yeah, the energy. And then back to like, we hate you. Sit back down. This is very normal. Back to we hate you. Yeah. And I go, I said something about like, I know, it looks like I'm about to do magic. I promise I'm not. And they're like, we hate you.

They don't get any sarcasm or irony. No. It's almost like the opposite because it's all about positivity. And then I, you know, stand up still cutting and I'm halfway through jokes going, don't tell the rest of this joke. I told a joke. I go, um, I did this girl. She was too young for me. She was 19 years younger. Um,

don't judge. I was in college. That's when you experiment. And they go, oh, wait, that means she was like three. Oh my God. Yeah, that's a tough opener. No, I didn't know. That's a good one. If that box. You just go into Bill Maher or something, right? What's your fail safe? Like DEFCON 5, what bit is just never going? You ever get in that situation where you jump to maybe this is what now. Yes, to your sure fires. Yeah, but nothing's working. In your head, you have nothing. Yeah. Oh my God.

But you're skipping chunks and then you're like, I don't have enough now. And you're speeding through half this and then the clock's going backwards on the piano at one point. And then people, I have pictures. I don't know if you have a website I could put up. We have nothing. It doesn't matter. We don't really good at social media. We barely have audio, I think.

I just got Wi-Fi. I get off, and I was supposed to sing happy birthday to Tony as Caitlyn Jenner, right? So there's a wig. I'm back on where the laptop is where I'm projected like a face swab. And I see the wig there, and...

Go for the wig. No. No? I say, I can't. I need to walk out of here with something. I can't walk out of here with a woman's wig on. So I leave it there. And not crush. Yeah. Yeah. And I just go sincere. I'm like, hey, guys, it's Tony's birthday. How about a happy birthday? I was supposed to be like, happy birthday to Tony, baby. Yeah. And do some, but he's got a big old cock. Yeah. But I bailed on that. And I just did a sincere happy birthday. And they just turned to their leader and they're like, happy birthday. And I use that to sneak out. I'm grabbing my stuff.

And so he thought I was offstage, but I was under the desk. And he goes, did you guys have a day you'll never forget? And they were like, yeah. And then he goes, this is a night I'd like to forget. No. He was talking about me. Have you ever heard Tony Robbins say negative things about anyone? No. He said about me. That's weird. It was rough. That's weird. That is weird. We'll be right back with this show. We're from our sponsors.

Yeah, I was just on a Zoom real quickly, and he was just super enthusiastic, and there were just all these flashing pictures of people all over the world. And he would go, I would do a bit. Like, he didn't like Fauci, so I was like, you don't need a vaccine. It'll solve everything, all that stuff. And he goes, give it up for Dana Carvey. So I'm just in my little room. My wife's cooking dinner downstairs, and he's going like this, and it went on for two minutes. So I started dancing in my room, and just for one landed joke. Yeah. It was during the pandemic, obviously. How much time did you have to do it?

I think it was supposed to be 45. I think it ended up being 35 and they were fine with it. David, do you have a Tony Robbins gig story? You know, I did get a call about a Tony Robbins gig. Oh. You what? I got a call about one recently. Are you being serious? I swear to God, yeah. Because I turned him down. I think what happens is they do these gigs. Yeah.

I was too busy. Go ahead, David. You're not throwing that. Well, Dana, you already did it, though. You were number two. No, but then they wanted me back in person. Oh, yeah, yeah. And I was really, really busy with something, and they only told me five days before. So I said, you know. There was nothing that was going to stop me to get $25,000. I would like that money now that my 401k is 70% down. Because of?

I think I know. Because of DocuSign. Or no. DocuSign, yes. The stock market's been bad. It went down over 100%. I actually owe money. It's negative 28%. No, it'll be fine. Yeah, yeah. I'm fine.

David? You guys are fine. I like when you both do Biden. It's funny talking to each other. Well, I just end with Pirates of the Caribbean. I love yours, your stuff. It's good. We have like different Bidens, which is...

Yeah. The latest one, did you do the whisper yell? Because that's what happened after Afghanistan. Yeah, I'd be like, come on, man. This guy gets this guy, Vladimir Puntang. Not Puntang. The guy. And then it's like, yeah, it's like a little or like a mumble. He does like... My dad used to do this where he'd patronize whisper. Like, I know better than you do. Oh, yeah. Because I know a lot better and I know how to do it. You know, your Biden's amazing. Yeah, he does. Come on.

Yeah, it does that. And you do everything. I mean, you just went at him early because now the New York Times is attacking Biden, saying he makes up stories and bumming. Back in those days, it was a hot oven, but your thing was always just edgy and funny. Kyle on YouTube and Instagram is always something that's ahead of the game. Yeah, you would just go anywhere you felt like going. Even when you do Caitlyn Jenner, you get –

You always wonder, are these Kardashians even aware? I never know. I found a video that they made, because I did a video where they were like, we're mad at you. The whole thing was just like, we're mad at you. We're all mad at you. And then Khloe did a video going, we're mad at you. Oh, really? They did it. So they saw that one. I don't know if they saw the other ones, though. I think-

Maybe just that one. Should we talk about one that you thought might tweak them? Because you're always going for the laugh. You don't seem like you're waving any political party or any point of view other than what's funny. Yeah, that's all I'm trying to do. You do Biden, the fresh prince of D.C., right? I'm trying to finish one up now. They take forever. And I go dark. So, you know, with-

making money on the internet, you've got to keep cranking stuff out. You know, sketch, it's really hard to crank out. I mean, SNL's, they got 30 writers or something, and then... Oh, no, a one-man band? What you're doing? I don't know how you get all that stuff. When you're doing it in the house, and you've got green screens and face swap and all these computer things, and you have graphics, and then I edit, and then it's like...

like I'll be like, Oh, I need tape to tape down this wig. So then I go to the store, I gotta get the tape for the wig and that's a half hour. And I'm like, Oh wait, I need a tie. Then I go to like the goodwill and I get a tie and then I'll shoot for an hour. I'm like, Oh, my ear was sticking out. I got to reshoot that for an hour. Some days. I know some people could help you. I need to find, I need to find a way to get money that I could pay people. Cause that's,

that would be great. Well, you're okay. Kyle Dunnigan, YouTube channel. Go check it out. More talent. It's tougher to make. There's just some ways it's hard to make money. No matter how good you are, just hard to get on YouTube and that shit. It's hard to crank out sketch. Like they do. SNL has got, there's probably two sketches a week that are, well,

Well, they ride about 50, 55 in 24 hours. And two are good. And they take two weeks off every two weeks. It's just like, it's like baseball, you know, most of you strike out. Sometimes three, Kyle. Oh, is it three? No, it's Lauren visiting the podcast. We would do two and then a week off and then three.

three and then we go off then around christmas two weeks off and yeah huge staff churning stuff out and it's a numbers game yeah so i'll like do a few in a row and i'll watch it grow and then i'll stop i'll need to like take a break for like a month or a couple weeks and it'll just i'll drop 40 on my next video so it's like that's i'm trying to figure out how to do the business side so now this next fresh pressing is more like a short film i'm going to release it like

and maybe have people pay like two bucks for it or something. - So it's a parody of the Will Smith show. - Yeah. - Yeah. - He's done a bunch of those. - I know, I've seen them just for the audience. - They're fucking funny. - He's kind of rapping as Biden and running around and then insanity ensues. - Yeah, and there's like sitcom laughs around it. - And the old president will fall up the stairs. - You know, Dana, I think we have a connection. We've been friends for a long time. And for this episode of "Fly on the Wall," we've partnered with eHarmony

which isn't us. E harmony is a dating app to find someone you can be yourself with. We are not dating. I want to clarify that, but the connection is what you want in a dating partner. Um, just someone like if you found someone that listened to this podcast, that's somewhat of a connection. And then you sort of build on that. You want someone with some common ground. Yeah, it's not it. Look, if you want to connect romantically over, you know, super fly or fly on the wall, um,

It just makes us happy. You don't want to be watching The Godfather and the person next to you goes, this movie sucks. So dumb. Yeah. You want to connect on all issues and harmonize in life. Similar sensibility, similar sense of humor, and similar sense of sense. I don't like when they watch The Godfather and they're like, everyone in this movie is so old. I'm like, they're 40.

Watch 2001 Space Odyssey. Too much of this movie is in outer space. I don't like it. When do they land? When do they land? Why is that stupid red light acting so silly? Who's friends with a robot? We know dating isn't easy. That's why we partnered with eHarmony because dating is different on eHarmony. They want you to find someone who gets you, someone you can be comfortable with.

Yeah. I mean, the whole idea is you're going to take a compatibility quiz, helps your personality come out in your profile, which makes all the profiles on eHarmony way more interesting and fun to read. So I think this is the goal of dating sites, and I think eHarmony does it great. It's just finding somebody you're compatible with.

So get started today with a compatibility quiz. So you can find some and you can be yourself with. Get Who Gets You on eHarmony. Sign up today. Well, also, people that are listening should know Kyle is a comedian. Been doing it forever. He up for five Emmys, wrote for the... Was it Inside Amy Schumer? And won an Emmy for...

Girl, You Don't Need Makeup, which I listened to today. What was that? Girl, You Don't Need Makeup. Was it on, Amy? Perfect when you wake up. Yeah, it was on the Schumer Show. My mom has that. I brought her the Emmys. She's very excited. Okay. We'll come back to the Schumer Show. Sarah Silverman, did you write for that show?

I did. Actually, that was a show I was writing and then I had, I was like, I have to get out of here. It was a great job, but I just felt like I was writing too much for other people and I wanted to perform in there. So I started making, I actually, during that writing thing, I figured out how to,

um, do the face swaps. So it was a FaceTime call so they could talk to each other. And that was like a big, um, I just like, I was doing invitations of the writers in the room and they liked it. Then I started doing it online. That's kind of what, what year was that? How long have you been doing this? Uh, 2016 or 16, 17. And so, okay. Well, early on, we'll tell us when you, you probably were into SNL because all, we all were. Yeah. And, um,

- But you did, did you finally get an audition? Or was it one or was it you were trying to get an audition like everyone? - Yeah, I didn't know what to do. Yeah, big fan of SNL. Dana's been a huge influence. We talked about that, but I don't wanna- - We don't have to talk about it. - Yeah, well, maybe we could talk about just a little bit. - We can talk a little bit. - Three sentences. - I'll comment, David, though, 'cause I was an extra on SNL. - When I was there? - This is the worst story. - No, you had left like the year before.

Let me just go back. But David... Oh, we're going to dog you that one, yeah. Yeah, David... Fucked you over. You could see in the monitors what was going on in rehearsal, and you could hear it. And I was like, oh, David's the funniest one. Because he was riffing. Yeah, I don't remember what you were doing, but he was like... And then when the air show came, he would freeze up a little bit. Yeah.

He was funny. David was always the funniest. So funny. But very, very low-fi. Rehearsals show you, yeah. I mean, rehearsal, I didn't know back then. They were probably taping him. But you're just bullshitting with your friends saying, by the way, anything. Forgetting you're on camera. But when Kyle was there, we were doing what happened to be one of my favorite ones ever, which was the Gap Girls. Lay Off Me, I'm Starving. Lay Off Me, I'm Starving. And Kyle, not only was he there, he was a...

Ooh. And they put him in the Gap Girl sketch.

And they put him in a primo spot behind us. I was super excited. I was really excited about that. So you were just on camera with no lines throughout the speech? Yeah, and I'm just right next to Chris Farley. I'm like, this is probably my big break. I'm not sure. That's hysterical. I'm not sure, but we're about to go out. And David comes over. He's like, yeah, this is my friend, whoever it was. My buddy was visiting from Arizona. And I'd never done this ever. You guys are flip-flopping.

And I fucking go, can he be in this? They go, yeah. And I go, Rick, why don't you sit here? And they pulled Kyle out. Yeah, well, they flipped me. So I go, we'll get you the back of your head, Kyle. And my friend will get the... And then he became famous off that. He got a deal off that extra work. Can I ask a question about this? Just for a second, because I don't know that part of you. When did you start being a comedian? Yeah.

Trying to be professional. Was your first stand-up at 18? Or were you doing little shows for your parents when you were 10? We have all different favorites here. When I was younger, I didn't...

I remember being laughed at, but not like me trying to be funny, but like humiliating things. Just in school? Yeah. Yeah. And even my very first memory was my whole family laughing. I mean, my grandmother was like, I was like, what's this, Nana? And it was a placemat. We got like a choo-choo place. And she goes, oh, you eat on that. And my little brain was like, eat on that.

on it didn't make sense, but eat it made sense. Like, I think I'd skip that little word. So I started eating it and they came in. I was trying to eat that. And this, my first memory is everyone like, ha ha ha ha.

And then I got to school. - What an idiot. - Yeah, and people would laugh at me, but I wasn't trying to be funny. I was little, I think we were like three little guys, right? - Yeah. - Three of us were like little guys. - What was your height and weight when you entered high school? - All I know is the tiniest, except for my friend Michael, was like a half inch and I loved, 'cause when they'd line you up, it was like Michael year on the end. But I was always number two. But I remember they had superlatives where they go, you know, best looking, most likely to succeed. And the popular girls come up to me and they never talked to me and they were like,

we decided you're the funniest. Whoa. What grade was that? I guess it was like eighth grade. I was like 12 years old. So before school- You know what I say to that? I go, you hungry? And they go, what? And you go, it's early. I'm going to ask you again. But I didn't really know or think I was funny. And then-

- The lobby of the, before you go into school, there's like a lobby and everyone hangs out. - Terrifying. - Yeah. - Junior high. - Right, right. And this big, the big bully, Scott Chapman comes up to me, pushes me and he goes, "You're not funny." - Whoa. - 'Cause word got out that I was gonna be the funniest and he wanted to be the funniest. And I was like, yeah, okay. I don't think you're right. - Beat the funny out of you. - Yeah. And he goes, "I'm funnier than you." Now everyone starts gathering around us. Like there's gonna be some funny fight. - Instead of a funny fight? - Yeah, yeah.

It's eight miles? So what does he say? I backed it. I was like, you are like, I totally agree. This is hilarious what you're doing. So then I got voted class clown. I got upset about it because clown, it kind of hit me. Clown isn't the same. It's not good. Especially when you're 12 and you want to be liked by girls. And it was like the popular girls. I was like, oh, they look at me like I'm this like clown.

So my friend was really sweet and he was intending to do something nice, but he went to the principal or whatever and was like, Kyle's upset. The clown called the clown. So they changed it to best person. They changed it to best personality. Really? Don't shrink down. Don't he's shrinking down in his chair. They changed it.

Did your gift for mimicry emerge at that time? Could you do the PE coach or were you doing it? Yeah, that actually got me attention from girls. I did Michael Jackson, this girl I really liked. We'd be like, do Michael Jackson. So I would just dance like a monkey. Then one time she'd cross it off her shoe, Michael Jackson. I got hurt personally. We broke up.

But did you do the voice or just do a little dance? I do the voice and the dance. I remember this is a hacky impression now, but I saw, one of my first impressions, I saw Christopher Walken at our local...

tiny grocery store, Weston, Connecticut, tiny little thing. I'd never seen a famous person before, you know, so I was following him around like a creep. You know the thing when you go to a grocery store and you're like, oh, I just want to get like some batteries, but then you start going, oh, I need that, I need that. So he had this whole pile of stuff. And right before he got to the front, he just like jangled it all over the floor. And he goes, oh no, my cottage cheese. And the lady was like, it's fine. And he's like, no, no.

No, you get quiet and be like, I'm sorry. He got really loud. And that like bug got in my head. I was like, I think one of the first impressions I did, but I did impressions. But then I started doing standup when I got out to try to make money. Cause there just was no money in sketch. Yeah.

Out of the world of school, out of college and stuff. Yeah, okay, so early 20s, you start doing stand-up. Yeah, and my managers were like, don't do impressions and guitar. So everything that I do well, I didn't do for 20 years until I found Facebook. They told me not to do that either. Yeah. Don't do impressions. Don't do the churchly. Bad.

bad advice that we got. Yeah. Later you go, what the fuck do you know? So then what was your, like those years you got on shows pretty quickly, like Cedric the Entertainer, you were a sketch player. Yeah, that was, I thought that was like a big break because I was kind of a hit sketch show and I joined mid-season because like we need a white guy to pick on. And before we would do the shows like a funny little thing, they would do a prayer circle and

And Cedric is very religious, and he's holding hands with two Jewish producers, and we're just sitting around. I would just stare at the Jewish producers because they'd have to be there like, please, Jesus, help these setups land our punchlines, and we'd be all praying for Jesus. And there was really only a couple of people who...

believed in Jesus, but that was before we went out. Those are awkward. Are you Jesus? Prayer circles are awkward. I'm not religious, no. Okay. Yeah. No. Do you have any affiliation with a political party? No. How do you spell your last name, Mr. Dunagan? Dunagan.

Wait, I want to get to some impressions too. But also, oh wait, when did you do cruise ships? Because my buddy does cruise ships and he said they're tough. My friend was like, don't do it, it'll be really bad. And I was like, how could that be bad? How could it not be bad? How could that be bad? So I go there and... Cruise ships. Three shows a night. And it's a free show, so everyone goes to the show because it's free, they already paid for it. And I'm bombing so hard. Mostly wheelchairs. It was a very old cruise. You hear people leaving and they just...

And then the walkers after that. He, by WD-40, is... And I got... We love when David does that. I know, he does great sound effects. WD-40 gets underplayed in the world. It's out there, though.

Yeah, but I was famous for being terrible on the ship, so I just hid in my room. And then you go and you're looking over the Lido deck and it's like, that guy sucked. Are you the guy that's horrible? Yeah, so you bombed the first night. No, I bombed every night. No, nothing. Three times a night. Three times a night where it was just this awful. And then one time, they make you, after the show, say goodbye to everybody. So you bomb and you gotta be like, thank you for coming. A little tangent. Yeah. So I see this woman sort of hovering. Good game, good game.

you know, around me. And I'm like, oh, here's a fan. We'll have to deal with this. This is nice. And she goes, I have to tell you, you look exactly like my dead son. My son just died a month ago. They were going to cancel this trip and they already bought the tickets and the dad won't look at me. Apparently I look amazingly and sound like her son who just died. So I'm like, oh my God, I'm so sorry. And,

And then I keep running into her because the ship's not that big. At the buffet, by the pool. And then I went to one bar and I'm like, oh God, there she is again. And she's got the rest of her family. And it was like, there he is. There he is. She confused you dying on stage. You both died. Once you died on stage, I was like, no, that's him.

And then she asked me to go rock climbing. Trying to be the son again? Yeah. Wow. And I can't say no to her. So now I'm rock climbing and she's staring at me. She starts calling you Michael or something? She was sort of having this thing with me and I had to do it. And I could tell I wasn't as good as her son. She was like, just climb up. Cool.

You're not acting. You're good at this. Yeah. So she's ordering you around like a mom to a son. Yeah. Just climb up. Yeah. And just come three feet up terrified. And her son, I'm sure, was like, bing, bing. You're the worst fake son. Yeah, that was my... Oh, boy. That was the week that Obama was...

Or not Obama, that Bin Laden was killed. Is that Obama? That was my Bin Laden. My mom was like this. That's what you do. My mom points like Obama. Not Obama.

So then how did you become a genius? Are they two different people? I don't know. Points like Obama? I meant to say Bin Laden. There might be something racist in there, but I kept saying Obama and Bin Laden. But yeah, she just...

points like a terrorist is saying their blood will run in the streets but mother's finger gets right in your face like that your mom's in your bits sometimes yeah she's really good actually do you tell her what to do or no yeah I actually surprise her because once she knows she's acting it's over we have to it's over she'll come on stage no when you film stuff at home oh you do the videos and I'll just when she's doing dishes I'll be like hey mom let's I'll just start doing something that is she has to improv it

That's Craig. Yeah. Craig. Yeah, I do Craig to my mom. Which is hysterical. Craig's hysterical. Thank you. Yeah. All right, we'll talk about... You know what's... Go ahead. Oh, you didn't get to your SNL audition. Oh, yes, yes, yes. Well, we want to get to that. We're just creeping up to like, how many years of stand-up and then when do you try out for SNL? Oh, yes. And the first time I did stand-up actually was in high school. It was 20 minutes before. My friends were like, you should do stand-up. And I...

I was like, okay, because I just did what people told me. And I wrote a set in 20 minutes and the set was 20 minutes. So I don't know what, that must've been very bad. First time usually crushes. What's that? First time usually crushes. It did pretty good because I was doing teachers and stuff like that, but I got suspended halfway through it. Everything could go wrong. It's so funny though. Yeah. But the halfway through the host, this girl was like, you have to, um,

You have to stop saying something about, oh, you can't say penis or Miss Ola's going to suspend you, was the thing. And then they were all quiet, like what happened? And I was like, I'm not allowed to say penis anymore. And then I started going, Mike, you're a boss. And then I started doing other names. Then they took me off stage. Anyway. They took you away. Yeah, they took me away in a jacket. But I like when you bump with the microphone with your chin while you're talking.

You hug it like this. He's hugging it. He's pumping it. So when did you start crushing and get the notion, I want to, and I'm highly qualified to be on Saturday Night Live?

I always wanted, like watching you and stuff, not that I felt like I'd be as good as you, but I thought like I can do that kind of thing. That's like in my wheelhouse. So I really want to do it and I love the show. You actually almost stopped me from getting, from losing my virginity. It didn't happen, but you almost-

I was coming home from a party and this woman who was... This girl, she's like 21, was in my Spanish class and she's on a balcony. She goes, Kyle Dunnigan, get up here. Just hammered. And we immediately had... She just decided we were having sex and I remember what happened in between. But then I was like... But I almost didn't go up because I was like, I want to go back and see Dana Carvey because SNL was starting. And I almost... But I...

I wish I had because I didn't think I got AIDS from this woman. I knew I got AIDS from this woman. It was back when, if you just had unprotected sex, you got AIDS. Right. Right when it started, so everyone thought. Yeah. It's everyone's going to get it. But you missed me on the show. I did, and I wish I hadn't. I got AIDS from watching Dana once. Yeah, yeah. So either way, you can't win. I had that effect on people. Fouchy got me, took care of me. We give you the shot, you give me the... The boosters. The boosters.

So you do it accurately. I just punt sometimes. He does it quietly. I just decide how I want him to sound and hope people will believe me. He does quieter Fauci. I'm a Danica derivative. You're not. You're not just crying, laughing, talking about...

Mickey Rooney. Yep. Mickey Rooney. I heard you do it before, but I know it's a true story. Word for word. You worked with him on a play? No, a TV show, One of the Boys in 1981. I was cast out of nowhere. I was just a young stand-up. Fred Silverman, the head of NBC. That's Mickey Rooney's grandson. Then I'm on a 747 with Nathan Lane. He was going. That's right. He was your brother. And so we became friends, and then we met Mickey, who had a .38 revolver. Mm-hmm.

Literally at least once an hour. I was the number one star in the world. You hear me? Bang, bang. The world.

Anyway. He's not kissing you. He's like pulling something. Yeah, he would say things like he needed money and he would just die laughing. Judy Garland never owned a car. It was non-sequitur. Why, Mickey? Because they pumped her so full of drugs they killed her. And then he would just look off into space. Yeah. Yeah. I asked him for money. Joe Louis, Joe Louis.

He'd be there, "Studden ya, studden ya." He's getting right up in my face. He's about four foot 10. He's going like this, right to my face. "Joe Lewis, slam, ma'am, Joe Lewis. This fire plug will take you out." He referred to himself as a fire plug. Anyway, that's another podcast entirely. But when I first met you, it was kind of interesting. I had dinner with you, 'cause David's very social and I'm homebody. And I didn't really know what you did. I just thought you were funny and a really nice guy.

And then I went home and looked you up and went, my God, this is my brother from another mother. I mean, it's an honor that you think that. Well, the evidence is on YouTube. It's like extraordinary acidy stuff. The way you do Stallone now...

It's like a character as well. There's a sweetness to him, kind of. Yeah, it's different than he... He's actually seen it, which is funny. We've had Frank Stallone on the show. Oh, really? And it's really cool to... Because some people like impressions, some people don't like... Why did you find that Stallone, that particular Stallone? He's a great guy.

You just started doing it. Yeah. You know, it's like really, like the punch is still on, you know? It's just really stupid. It's like confidence, you know? Yeah. But super sincere. Confidence, stupidity. Confidence, stupidity, you know? I just did like a, I'm doing, he like makes little movies and the last one, which got demonetized. Everything gets demonetized that I put out, but yeah.

He's like doing a documentary on 9-11, but it was like the day we got 9-11. Yeah, that's it. The first building got 9-11. What about this? Kyle and I joke about like if he goes on dates or, you know, we're obviously both older than our twilight years. Mature. Back nine. And when we're out, I remember I was with –

said Rick, our friend, all my friends are my age, so we were in Las Vegas and we sat at this booth and this girl came. She was our hostess. So they like to blab and then the manager sends her, go talk to those guys. So she just sits with us but no one invites her. She's 21. She's like, hey guys, so if you're in Vegas, I'm like, yeah, that's

safe bet. And then, and then she doesn't have much to say. And so she goes, where are you staying? We're like, oh, the Mirage. And she goes, oh, fine. That's the one that's got a big fountain. You know, she doesn't know anything. And then my buddy goes, you know, I was there when they built the Mirage. I was there opening night. She's like, huh? I go, Rick, quick.

quit advertising how fucking old we are. Like, built them, or she doesn't even know that it was ever built. She goes, what? And he goes, yeah. And I go, oh yeah, and we were at, he goes, remember the dunes before they blew it up? I go, Rick, it's getting worse. The monkeys were better than the bees. Yeah, he goes, ah,

I go, we were at Joey Bishop's 40th at the Dunes. Were you there? No, I'm 21 years old and that was 200 years ago. And we just got to be careful because you've said it before, you slip and say something like, I've got buddies who are like,

You know, do you use compression socks? And she's like, huh? Yeah. I'm like, why are you talking about the oldest things in the world? I even feel old. I go, you don't wear that. And he goes, yeah. And my other friend's like, when I, if I have like soreness and she goes, I know my arm hurt yesterday. And he's like, oh, do you think it's arthritis? I go, what? Like, what?

It's not arthritis. She's 21. Quit saying the oldest, sickeningest words that even I'm at your table going, beat it, old man. Yeah, he's not good for you. What's young schtick, though? What would you say to a peer younger? Like, I love you, okay? No, there's no conversation. It's just she was doing her job to say hi. But this happens a lot.

When fans or just anyone comes up and says hi, and then we just catch ourselves having – it's just too old. You're right. Just references. The old vibe. It is hard. My last date that I had – I don't go on many dates because of what happens on them. And she says to me –

Well, you're a little long in the tooth. And I don't think we were talking about age or anything. And I thought we had a... Yeah, I never heard from her again. Yes, that's how it started. We were talking about that. Long in the tooth. Long in the tooth. Long in the tooth. That makes her seem old. That's an old-fashioned... That is old. Maybe she was 62 with a nice lift. Yeah. Yeah, my dating's not been... I went on a date where the girl was...

She showed up different than what her picture was. Just say that. Very different. Just say different. And she gets in the car and she gets nauseous and every five minutes we're pulling over for her to drool out of the car and then she takes off her shoe and starts rubbing her bare foot like crossed over. Anyway, it's been going well. So anyway, about SNL. I just want to answer one. I know a guy went on a Tinder date with this woman and she'd never, I guess she's

Didn't have a lot of money, but they took her to a sushi restaurant and she just kept saying, I want to stab it. I want to stab it. So she had a fork. She was just stabbing the sushi. What do you mean? Just a little piece of sushi? Yeah. I want to stab it.

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Or choose mobile service where a technician will come to you and do routine maintenance right on the spot. Both are complimentary and depend on your location. That's ownership built around you. Contact your participating dealer or visit FordService.com for important details and limitations. I'll tell you one last story of when my waiter, who's German...

There was a picture of me kissing a girl in a pool that was secretly taken or whatever, but it was kind of all over the place because it just was a weird match of people.

Me and her. Actually, it was just weird because she was cute and I'm gross. That's really the headline. And so my waiter goes, hey. So it's definitely very weird. Obviously, I'm aware of it and it's weird. And then about a week later, the guy goes, hey. He knows me. How was your vacation, huh? I go, okay. And he goes, ah, a little pool party, huh? I go, yeah. He goes, ah, a little fun in the sun, huh?

And he goes, yeah. I saw pictures of you kissing a girl. Yeah, I know. I know what you're talking about. He goes, oh, why do they make you so fat in that? And I go, what do you mean? He goes, you get out of the pool. It's like, I didn't know you were kind of fat, but why do you want that picture? I go, I don't want that. What are you talking about? I go, that's what a paparazzi is. They take

a hundred pictures of you and find the grossest one and then they go they got a jeweler's loop and they go he looks fat and gross here we got a winner run with it and then someone runs into the press room but he goes no I wouldn't pick he doesn't get it he goes no I wouldn't pick that one cause you know you look kinda fat you wanna look good I go

Why aren't you listening? You don't understand what I'm saying. He goes, no. We need to get a lot of people out of your life. No, that guy, he's all right. Let's put on Speedos. Everybody just makes... Go to the beach. I'm an easy target. Promenade around and then run to the web and see if Daily Mail. All right, SNL audition, that's all. SNL audition, okay. At this point, let's just say you're a seasoned stand-up and you probably do...

pretty much any accent and at least 50 top notch impressions. Have you done Amy Schumer's show yet at this point? You've done any of that stuff, writing? No, I had done Cedric, which was a sketch show, but I never worked on any, there was no reason to really work on any impressions or characters because I wasn't doing it on YouTube and there was no money in doing it. Right. I was doing stand-up and doing... It was just shame. Yeah, and you do just...

Straight stand-up. Yeah, just doing straight stand-up. Extremely funny as well. Yeah. Thank you. I always feel like square peg into doing stand-up. Like I'm trying to do scenes in stand-up. That was the same with me. Yeah? I was always, I didn't realize that until later. No wonder it was difficult in a honky-tonk bar. Show us your dick, you know? Yeah, right.

i am a french waiter and now i'm trying to yeah so yeah i so what i did was i just made a random tape of impressions and sent it in not even thinking because nothing was going on and i was broke and somehow they were like flew me out and decided that i would audition and it felt like way too big suddenly it's like the next day i was flying out

And I'm trying to write the thing and I'm really, really nervous. And I'm in a hotel for two days just running it. And you gotta be like, here's my six minutes or whatever. Trying to get it correctly on time, which is the wrong, you know, I know I'm in the wrong mind frame. And I get there and it was 30 of us. It was Nick. 30? Yes, 30 people. Nick Kroll was there and he was talking about that. Yeah. And he was with John Mulaney, who looked really young. I was like, hey, how old are you?

I'm like, do I know you? He's like, no, I'm five. I'm this many.

So I was like, this guy's not going to make it. I've never heard of John Mulaney. Let me absorb that. I'm five. He made jokes about how young he looked. He does. He looked real, really young. Crazy for the high school senior. So he's auditioning too. He's auditioning. And it's the same day as Nick Kroll. Nick Kroll. 30 people. 30. That's a death march. And I'm just like...

white knuckling and I'm just like, please not first. I just want to go first. You know, let someone else figure this out. - So you can hear, can you hear? - No. - Was this in 8-H? - I think people could actually, but I, no, we were in the Conan's Jigs, they were doing the Olympics. - Oh, 6-A. Yeah, 6-4, Rockford Center, got it. - But they're like, first up is Kyle Dunnigan. And I was like- - Out of 30? - Yeah, I know, that's, what are the odds of that? 3% odds? 3.3% odds?

So I went into the, you can do this. Hey. You got this. You got this, buddy. Right. But I'm having trouble. He didn't have this. Go ahead. Spoiler. So they're micing me up, which is nerve wracking in itself when someone's micing you. And the camera guy is like, I'm going to count you in three, two, one. You're writing stuff. I'm getting nervous. This is.

so well told crew guys have too much power to ruin it the mic thing and all the okay kid is that good for you do you like it right now and they're not nervous at all where do you want your radio pack do you want it right in your pocket it's all these questions you don't want to think about yeah

So he goes, I'm gonna count you right into your stuff. Three, two, one, you go right into your stuff. So he said to me, my stuff. So I had that locked in my head. So I walk out and the camera's in front of me and Lauren and everybody are to the left and I'm just staring at the camera. - Oh no, any applause at all? No, just silence. - Nothing's happening. - You just walk out. - Nothing's happening. And then Lauren goes, hello? Like, hello, say hello to us, we're over here. And I go, oh, hello, hi, hi.

And I turn back to the camera and more dead silence. And the guy's not counting me in, you know? And then Lorne says something. I'm already on thin ice. And that just crushed me through the ice. He goes, are you okay? Whoa. And then I start trying to tell him the guy. I go, well, he said three, two. He knows he's about to get tattled on. So he counts me in and the red light goes on. And I'm just destroyed, devastated.

I can't get to any facility or impression. My brain's like, look, all hands on deck to make this guy pass out. Drop the bill. We're not doing any of that. We're just going to breathe, you know, Caitlin, you know, but she wasn't alive. It was alive. She wasn't anyway.

So I can't even, they brought a piano out for me. I can't play the piano. Like I'm just plunking on it. And every impression sounds the same. I'm like, this is Chris Hansen. I'm Chris Hansen. This is blah, blah, blah. I'm sort of outside myself. And then I walk out, like I just got beat up. And then the producers go to everybody else. Guys, when you go out there, say hi to Lorne. Okay? Okay.

And so everyone after me was like, hi. So how not to do it. Yeah. Anyway. And be funny. It's fine. How many were out there? There's Lorne was like 10 people. It was probably 10 people. And they were sort of to your left and the camera was center. Yeah. I didn't know where it played. Yeah. I didn't know if it was good to them or the camera, but the camera guy, it seemed like that was the thing to do. Yeah. What was your Bill Maher there? Okay, people. Do you think you're one of those people?

Well, let's hear Bill Maher. Yeah, keep going. Does anyone else do him? I don't think... To me, your hook was the okay hook.

Okay, people. Yeah. Whiny, whiny, whiny. You think you're this and that. Do you really think? You don't. You're wrong. Church lady, do you think there's a magic man in the sky? There's not. Okay. Okay. It's sustaining the okay. Yeah. Eve was a pig. She was made out of ribs. Okay. I knew it.

Yeah, because he admonishes his audience so directly. You think this and you think that. Everything sounds sarcastic. You think you're good. I bet even if he was trying to be sincere. There we go. Yeah, I'm sort of like that where people think I'm not sincere. Him ordering frozen yogurt. I'll have the rum raisin because it's delicious. Okay. I'll have the go-gurt.

What impressions did you do on SNL audition? The attempted. I did Chris Hansen was big at the time. How does he go? Can you do him now? You're not nervous now? Yeah, he was the guy from To Catch a Predator. Oh, yeah. He was trying to have sex with old girls. His screen name was, yep, you guessed it, Boner 95. He was trying to have sex.

He does like nine notes and the one word sex. He goes, yeah, he's so lascivious. He's got a new show on. I was watching. It's just, everything is so cryptic and it's come out. He's kind of a criminal sort of, which is interesting. Quietly. Yeah. Yeah.

And what was your one that never failed that you couldn't get to that day with Lauren watching? None of them sounded like any of them. Oh, you really couldn't get in the voice from nerves. Yeah, I was so shell-shocked. It's almost like if you're afraid of bees and there's bees around you, I couldn't even begin to get to...

what I, my voice. It's really so inefficient, this thing, because I, Steve Carell, when he auditioned for the show I did in 96, Yeah, yeah, that was great. He came in and he was really nervous. Yeah. You know, and he wasn't really doing well, but I was such a horrible auditioner that later I looked at his tape

And of course, Louis and Smigel loved him too, but it was like, oh no, he was just nervous. Didn't mean a thing to me. It would be always better if you put it on tape and sent it in because then you just do it on your own time, your own speed. You get it the best it is. I know. I think so. And I hear that they do try to rattle you. I know Nick was saying that they... So maybe they do, but they...

Lauren, if you're listening, you don't have to. Everyone's really nervous. You're already really nervous. And I get it's a live show. You better be able to handle it. And there's an argument for that. Like, I wasn't ready to do that show. You know, it's funny when I don't remember this, but Louis C.K., when he auditioned, I think he auditioned where we did at maybe Catch Rising Star or one of those places, Stand Up Comedy Club, where me and Robbie Schneider did. And

And when I was on the other side of it, it was like, oh, there's auditions tonight. If anybody wants to go, like Marcy would say, you guys. And so Downey, so a bunch of us went down because I was still a writer also and performer. I had no pull, but I don't know if it was Lorne, but it was maybe that first one is everybody else. Maybe it's Lorne, but you know, it's still scary. Smigel, Downey, Frank, you know, all of us. And then a bunch of scattered writers and producers. And then Louie said he was going on and we were walking in when they introduced him.

And he said, I shushed everyone to be quiet so he could start. Oh.

I don't remember that, but it sounds about right that you would go, I just did this two years ago. And I know how sick he is backstage going, oh no, I got to go on. And then they're like, you're up there. They're like, well, they're not here yet. And then they go, ladies and gentlemen, and they go, oh, they're coming in. And you're like, wait, that's exactly like a horrible situation. What do you do? Do you not start your best jokes at the top? No one's listening. Everyone's like, I'll get a vodka soda. Do you guys have a potato skins? You know, you're like, no, no, just listen right now. That's the only part you need to hear. And then we can do whatever.

At one point, Lauren did stop me. I got to be seen in a comedy club, but I also did the thing you did with like eight people there. Is that all you've got or is that pretty much? That's what he said? Yeah. But I thought later it was to see if I would blink, you know. But I had a rough childhood. I know yours was a peaches and cream. It really was. So I had a lot of anger in me that I would translate into competitiveness like,

sometimes like I had a little bit of like, okay. I saw that audition that you're talking about. It's online somewhere and you were really funny. I remember that. And I remember thinking, wow, he's really, that's really tough. You were, you were like, um, I remember there was like a microphone, like, Oh, penis. Oh, you started doing Robin Williams. Oh, yeah, that was an easy one to do. I always, I felt like I kind of bombed. I felt very nervous, but you know, part of the

Stand-up and show business is hiding nerves, right? Yeah. That's it. I think his argument is, well, when it's live to the world, we don't need you freezing up. I think that's a legit thing to do. It's sort of true. I just think that if the government...

mandated that you would do Saturday Night Live, you would have flourished because you get desensitized. It just takes time. Yeah, there's also once you have a job, some people, and I think I'm like, once I have a job, I relax. It's more like trying to get the job where it gets really nervous. Yeah, because there's Lorne, this is the thing, and I came on, there was just the original cast, and then there's Billy Crystal, Eddie Murphy years. So the legacy was only 10 years old.

So the people coming in now, it's like 45 years of comedians and pitchers. Here's what you got to compete with. I think you saved the show because- I love you, Kyle. No, I mean, I really, if you think about, that show was dead. I mean, no, you elevated it. You saved it again. You're the funniest guy. I kept it on the air. Yeah.

It's in the baton, but I was like, here, Adam, here, Chris, David. I can't even argue that Dana was so good on there. I want to. Also, that time, I don't remember anyone talking about it. I mean, Robert Downey Jr. was in the cast. In 85, yeah. Did you overlap with him? No, I was right after that purge year. Weird cast. Where Madonna did the cold opening, my first show, saying that last year was just a dream, it never happened. Oh, is that what she did? Yeah. Because it was like going to...

Iron Man for your laughs. He's great, but... But I was nervous as hell and I had shitty shows and, you know, it was just, you do get used to it, but there is an aggression to it. It's a rock and roll show. It's like aggressive. It was scary being in Extra and they're like counting down

and all the extras get nervous. I thought I'd really made it or something, and they sent all the extras into the Donahue room, and they're like, you stay in here. You don't look the cast in the eye. We're going to come in here every 20 minutes and beat you with a stick. And you could feel like, oh, we're...

I remember when Kyle came right up to me and he said, hey, you accidentally switched me in the booth during Gap Girls. Can you just go ahead and fix that? Because it's harder for me to be on camera. Actually, you were in one of my favorite Gap Girls ever sketches I ever did. I know. It's funny. I have a memory of being there. It's unreal. And that was pretty interesting. So you were there as David's friend? You were friends at that point? No, I didn't know him. Or didn't know him. I was in the booth with him. Yeah. No, you were in the booth.

Not with us, but you were in the booth right on camera. I was with your friend. Oh, with my buddy. Yeah, we just flip-flopped sides to the back of my head. I'm sure he iced you once he was on camera. He said once Farley sat down, though, his acting career was 100% over. Because it was funny, funny, then Farley shifted or something and he just, it was like an eclipse. Yeah. It was over.

Arnold said that about Danny DeVito. You never get Danny, never have him sit down because he loses the energy. You got to keep Danny on his feet. You got to pump him up. Oh, you must do Arnold, of course. Who can't you do? Who do you want to do? Who are your favorites that you do? I can't do you guys. Did you do anything on Amy Schumer? No one can do my voice. I have a blank voice. Hi, I'm Danny DeVito. He has a voice. He has kind of a cool...

He's like a throwaway thing that I start to do and I don't think about it. Doing him? A throwaway thing. Can you get to his timber though? Because he has kind of a, this is David Spade, everybody. He has kind of a timber that's a lower register. It's more of a laziness. It's more of a laziness. Because my jaw always hurts. My neck, so I don't move. Does that get you down? Hey ladies, what's up girls? No, it's just sexy. There's only one word to describe it.

When you were on Amy Schumer, you were a writer and did you, we'll get you out of here soon. Yeah, what's Amy Schumer like? Was it fun to be a writer on that? Was it, you wrote some good sketches. It was pretty much a heyday for her show, right? It was a big, big show. Big show. Yeah, it was a really good schedule too because we'd come in and have like really basic pitches. Like this is a guy who owns a hamburger shop, but he's afraid of hamburgers or whatever. That'd be your whole pitch. Bring in five.

And then they go, okay, write scared hamburger guy and this other sketch. And we'd go home for three days and we'd send it in on Thursday. Oh, really? And then on Friday we'd get notes and then we'd fix it. So it's like we lived lives. Oh, you didn't just sit there. Because then we had soaked in sweat and fear like we did. So...

you got trained to be a sketch writer on that show. They hired you from your standup or how did you just network in? Yeah, she just hired me from standup. So there was no crazy audition with Amy there going on. Did you worm your way on? They want to audition me. I don't know if you've heard what happens. Yes. What? What? What are you talking about? We want to trend. We never trend. No, but she's funny, man. We would love you to be on the show, Amy.

Yeah, did you get on the show? Did you do anything on the show? Yeah, originally it was, yeah, I was, yeah, I was on a few things. Okay, could you have a softer answer? And then- I was- What about stuff? He goes, I was- Hi, I was on this show. We'll be right back. What was the highlight so far then? Because you-

When did you just fucking destroy at a club or a gig that you went, okay? Because I've seen some, I think you were at Toronto Comedy Festival or Montreal, and you're destroying just stand-up. You saw me there? No, I saw it on YouTube. Oh, oh. I mean, it was kind of destruction. I remember it being-

Have you ever destroyed? Or are you not remembering this? Dana said I just destroyed. I think you must have destroyed because I look at the talent and then I think of the number of times on stage. I mean, what have you done? He's got to. You were killed a couple years ago somewhere. I'm not going to follow you. If we go out on a little fun night, David likes to hit the clubs. Yeah, hit it. That was Kyle Dunn again. And now Dana Farfo, the living museum piece. That's what I feel. He's still alive.

Let's bring him out. No, you do. The longer you stay around, you become a museum piece. Dana, the road to getting engaged can be long and full of memories. Oh, yeah. Or it can be short and thrilling or somewhere in between. But the road to finding the perfect engagement ring is straightforward path every time. All you got to do is head over to good old BlueNile.com. Good news, David, on BlueNile.com.

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Yeah, because it's such a nice ring. It's an unmarked thing, but then it says Blue Nile somewhere. Yeah. She goes, oh, you couldn't have. You wouldn't have spent that much. Oh, this has got to be a trick. This is too nice. Yeah, no. Right now, get 30% off. Select Lab Grown Diamonds on BlueNile.com. Plus, use code FLY, very important, to get $50 off your engagement ring purchase of $500 or more. What is it?

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i'm gonna do a set you want to go on and you want me to go on i want you go and then you can get out of here and uh we shot the for a little bit he was gonna try some stuff and then when i followed him i go um

I think that stuff's working. I don't know. I think it's done. He fixed it. Yeah. It's not really amateur hour. No one works harder than him. Yeah, he's too good. Or Louis as well, but just as far as just writing. Oh, I know. And workhorse. Yeah. I did the comedy cellar, and it was Jerry Seinfeld went up, then Robin Williams, and then Chris Rock, and then I was next. This is...

Well, that would be a tough spot. After Robin died? Before? When was this? It was just after he died. That's a tough spot. It was a tough spot. Oh, look. Oh, look at this. Oh, the leprechaun man. All right, my last story. We represent the lollipop guild. No, Robin was the fly. I was doing the improv. Yeah.

And they said, you know, I hosted it a lot when I was in the beginning before SNL and all that just to get on stage. I mean, of course they go, Bud would say, David, why don't you stay in the halls? Don't stand in the halls. And he goes, do you want to host one night? It's not about the money. It's the honor. And I was like, do I get a pineapple chicken dinner at least?

Because I'd have to eat there. I had no money. So I was, now and then they'd have a showcase night. So they had me do seven minutes for Star Search or, you know, whoever. And I'm standing there waiting. And it's a good crowd. It's packed. And I'm next. And the guy's finishing up. He got the light. And then behind me, I hear, her. Touched shoulder. David's face. And I go, oh, hey, Robin. I don't know Robin really well at all. I met him through Bobcat. And I go, oh, hey. And then it hit me.

you're not fucking gonna go all right you know and he goes i'm just gonna jump on real quick i go of course and then he went on did 45 and he annihilated raped and pillaged and then and while i was like a salmon because he walked off and the whole crowd left with him and i was trying to get to the stage the street yeah like the pied piper yeah i was like excuse me pardon me like bugs bunny and i finally get the stage was about 18 people out of the whole club and

And all the people that went to see me left, they're like, ah, it's not going to get any better than that. I had one run-in with Bud where I was at the comic strip in New York and I was eating Chinese food. And he goes, hey, can I have a little bit of that? And I go, nah. And he goes, I don't know who you are, but you'll never work in L.A.

I thought he was joking. I thought he was joking back. And he may have been joking. I still don't know to this day. Who was talking to you? Bud Friedman. He was in New York? Yeah, he's still on a comic strip. Yeah, I thought we were kind of joking. Take it outside? I did him on SNL. Didn't do very well. Take it outside. Take it outside. And the monocle did kind of bomb it. Just for the fans listening, Robin Williams, I got to know him really well the last five, ten years of his life because he moved out to Marin where I was raising my kids. Played a little local theater. Yeah, the shyest, sweetest...

The dichotomy between the powerhouse on stage, and to me it's like Elvis charisma, because he was so introverted, so shy, and so deferential, called everyone boss. Okay, boss? All right, boss. And then he would go on stage, and he had such likability, and to me, he was like a Shakespearean actor forever.

coming on stage as if he had nothing. So he created this whole, because he was always saying, oh, did I take anything from you? He was always making amends. I said, no, I tried to be you. I stole your whole act. Yeah. And- Right, he walks on like he's got nothing and then he's-

Even the improv, it's a Rolodex of like, if I think of this, I do have a joke about that. Yeah, yeah, right. If you say this. And his commitment, you know, pick up a little plastic thing. Oh, flying saucer. There was just one time, I think it was Albert Brooks that said, Robin, it's okay. Because when Robin would get on, he couldn't stop himself. Yeah, yeah. Anyway.

All right, well, enough about Kyle. Kyle, thank you for coming on. Let's start the podcast. I'm warmed up. Kyle did a great job, and Kyle's a guy you've got to check out on YouTube. Kyle Dunnigan, okay, compliment alert. Good, yeah. If you like comedy, you've got to go on Kyle Dunnigan YouTube channel. KyleDunnigan.com? Dot com. Dot com. KyleDunnigan.com. I wear your merch hoodie.

And I've sold a couple since then. Really? There's a plethora. I love it. And what is your latest favorite voice? Is it Biden? Because he's so current now? Yeah, Alec Biden. Also Alec Baldwin. Yeah, that's a really interesting take. We have a little bit to finish off today, our little impression cavalcade. Hey, Alec Baldwin, how are you doing? Doing well. We're thinking of finishing Rust, but I haven't pulled the trigger yet. My wife...

Ilaria. Ilaria. Born in España in a little town known as Boston, Massachusetts. Well, what does Elon Musk think of this? It's pretty cool. Yeah. Yeah. Rush is probably going to be a pretty cool movie. Impressive jukebox. Doesn't Alec Baldwin's wife have another little baby named Ilaria?

they're all called elaria they all have 19 but it's not an h it's an eye it's illaria it's it's illaria and there's an illaria he did a instagram where he went off on i love my children sure i'd like to be playing poker with the guy sometimes or going to a film or seeing an opera or playing

playing golf and he listed for 20 minutes 100 things he'd rather do what's your trump what do you do so terrific my trump it's the best trump it's gotta be the most fantastical trump it's really not but it's like silly it's like exaggerated I did him before before he ran he was present stuff but it never got better there's people who do it that guy on SNL does it really really well yeah his is yeah I do trans trump yeah

Trans Trump. What is that like? Don't ask. It's the same. Don't ask. Oh, okay. Trans Trump. He's trying to get elected for the next 2024. Look, we'll just end there. Listen, thank you so much, carling.com. I was going to do Trump applying chapstick. We're going to put it on. We're going to put a lot of on. Let me tell you, the lips are going to get soft. You're going to love them like you wouldn't believe.

Cherry, grape, all different flavors. Ray Liotta, the late great brilliant Ray Liotta. How do you do Ray Liotta? Chantix. You know, it was that Chantix commercial. I did a thing where he's like, try fucking Chantix. Why would you want to quit smoking? Why would you do that? Why would you want to quit smoking?

See, it works. How would Sylvester Stallone sum up? I hate when people do this to me. Oh, my God, yeah. Sum up the podcast, Stallone. First, I like the beginning when everybody said Kyle was funny. Then the beginning got a little weird when Kyle was talking. Then the end was nice when people said Kyle was funny. That's a good summary. All right, everyone grab a protein bar on the way. Enjoy it. Thank you, Kyle. Thank you, guys. We appreciate it. Thank you. Bye, guys.

Hey, what's up, flies? What's up, fleas? What's up, people that listen? We want to hear from you and your dumb questions. Questions, ask us anything. Anything you want. You can email us at flyonthewallatcadence13.com. Who's the next question from, Dana? Let's see here. It's Samantha Washburn. Samantha Washburn. I like she goes, here's my dumb question. Funny already. Yeah, she's playing along with how we do it.

Do you try to hang out, talk with certain friends before performing or appearing on something to get you in a funny mood? Or do you just spring out of bed every morning and start cracking yourself up with your own jokes? Are there, this just keeps going. Are there people in your life that bring out your funniest version of you? Who? Rack them. I love it. That's.

That's a reference for people don't know was almost going to be the title of this podcast. It was David's idea. And it's based on when in pool, when you're a great pool shark, you say rack. Yeah. You hit the last one in and you go, right. You get all the, you know, like you just nailed all the billiard balls. So if you nail a joke, you go, right. So that's funny. She didn't use it in the perfect sense, but I liked that she used it.

Because she started with, here's my dumb question. And it was rack them in between. Not so good. No, it was very good. Samantha. She gets it all. Okay. Sam, Sam, Sam Washburn. So Dana, this is a good question. Now I will say I do try to surround myself with funny people, even,

I don't say even females, but if I date someone, I like when they're light on their feet or just laughers or fun. Nothing too serious or heavy because there's enough of that in the world. So Dana makes me laugh. We're having dinner tonight and it makes me laugh. Yeah, we are. You're going to come late.

Is that me? No. You're so funny because you're the only one that goes to dinner earlier than me, which is shocking. I know. You like to get a big steak and fries and then lay down to go to sleep at night. I like to be kind of empty. I can't sleep. I can't eat and go to sleep. I have farmer's hours. I poo in my car on the way home.

I thought that was a private thing you wanted to tell me. And now it's beamed out. I like when I get a little gross and Dana goes, Oh boy. Okay. So let's get back to this. Who does Dana's wife is very funny and she's exactly that. She's light on her feet. She's has an incredible sense of humor that she's a human laugh machine, but it's real. Um,

So it's, yeah, puts me in a good mood. When I go to Dana's and she's there, she laughs, she's funny. She adds funny things and she just gets all the whole thing. And, uh, she just, just like talking to other comedians. And I do like being around people like that. I don't wake up cracking up, but sometimes I do laugh.

- By yourself? - Yeah. - What do you, yeah? - Isn't that embarrassing? - That's healthy. But there's two things here. There's one is before performing. I don't think, the only thing that gets me turned on

It's when I go out to an audience and I get a big laugh and then I'm immediately into the mode of being funny. In life though, hanging out with you or Lovitz or Dennis Miller or any of our rowdy friends, a funny person starts making you laugh and then you kind of bounce back. So that's- Some people just drop your energy. They don't have to be hilarious, but some people are just almost the opposite. Like for some reason you walk away feeling woozy or you just feel like in a bad mood or you're kind of down and-

That's just a chemistry thing. So, yeah. Anyway, long story short, rack them. This has been a podcast presentation of Cadence 13. Please listen, then rate, review, and follow all episodes. Available now for free wherever you get your podcasts. No joke, folks.

Fly on the Wall has been a presentation of Cadence 13, executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade, Chris Corcoran of Cadence 13, and Charlie Finan of Brillstein Entertainment. The show's lead producer is Greg Holtzman with production and engineering support from Serena Regan and Chris Basil of Cadence 13.