Episode XV: 2026 Milan-Cortina Winter Olympics/2028 Los Angeles Summer Olympics
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Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring. It's the end of a little era. Quite enjoyed myself. Yeah, this has been a lot of fun. We're not just talking about the Olympics. This is the end of season one of Two Guys, Five Rings. With this episode, as we look forward to more Olympics in the future, we must also look back at Two Guys, Five Rings, which has really taken not only the media by storm...

I think that it's changed who we are and how we look at the Olympics. Wouldn't you say, Bowen? Absolutely. I have never been more invested in the materials of the mattresses in the Olympic Village than I have since this podcast. I've learned so much. We've had such a great team that has helped us along the way. We appreciate you all.

I mean, what will you take away and cherish the most after this? We got to meet Greg Louganis. I mean, that was amazing. You got to go back and listen to that episode and that interview if you haven't yet. I mean, that was probably, I would say that was the highlight of it for me, was getting to connect with him and just such an icon and such a legend. And yeah.

And of course, always sharing time with my sister and really, really connecting over world events. I think we got so much closer doing this. We did. And we got to talk about really important things like Billie Eilish, like Lady Gaga. Oh, Ayo, Ayo. We smoke animal. And of course, Celine Dion. I need you. Wait, wait.

That's Leigh-Anne Rimes. That's Leigh-Anne Rimes. I don't know why. Wait, hold on a second. No, no. The fact that you said Celine Dion in Midlands. I didn't like water.

I'm going to get thrown into international court for this. Oh, the producers are laughing. They're sending emojis. They're cracking up. Oh, no. How could I? And of course, Celine Dion. How do I live without you? That's so insane. My French Canadian ass is going... They're taking my card away. Well, it's not about French anymore, okay? Oh, it's about Italian.

In 2026, it's the Milan Cortina Winter Olympics and Paralympics or 2026 Milan Cortina Olympic Winter Games, baby. It's going to be the first Olympics, winter or summer, officially featuring multiple host cities. It's amazing. It's very, I would say, Demi Lovato and Nick Jonas going on tour together. Yeah. In that it's more than one. In that it's more than one. And in that the world will gather. Yeah.

100%. And we will remember it. And we will remember it for all time. Like we are now. And everyone involved is very talented. That's true. You can't deny it. In that way, it's a lot like the Demi Lovato-Nick Jonas tour. More than 3,500 athletes expected to compete from 93 countries across both Olympics and Paralympics. 116 events in 16 sports in the Winter Olympics. Six sports in the Paralympic Winter Games. And a new Olympic sport. Yes. Yeah, there's ski mountaineering.

Sort of the breaking of the Winter Olympics, which was a part of the 2020 Winter Youth Olympic Games. In ski mountaineering, competitors ski uphill and downhill and use mountaineering abilities to race through snow-covered mountains. This is crazy.

pretty crazy. Ski mountaineering is particularly popular in Italy and its roots can be traced to the first crossing of the Alps on skis. So this is uphill downhill skiing. It's going to take strength. It's going to get determination. It's going to take a whole lot

lot of grit. Grit. Seven more Olympic events overall compared to the 109 contested at the 2022 Beijing Winter Games, including the addition of eight new events and the elimination of one event. Uh-oh. Sorry, Alpine skiing, you know, mixed team. You're not in it.

There's three ski mountaineering events, two additional events in freestyle skiing, men's and women's dual moguls, one additional event in luge, by far the scariest Olympic sport. There's now separate men's and women's doubles events instead of one event open to both genders. An additional skeleton event added, it's a mixed event, and one additional ski jump event added, which is the women's large hill. This is...

So specific when it comes to skiing. Yeah. Can you talk about this? Well, as an amateur skier, and we all have to be if you grew up in Colorado. So, gosh, I had my French Canadian card revoked for thinking Leanne Rimesong was sung by Celine Dion. I'm going to get my Colorado card revoked for thinking that...

ski jump was for not knowing what skeleton is. What is skeleton? That's a really good question. I feel like we would know it if we saw it. It's kind of like when someone doesn't know who Stanley Tucci is. You're like, you would literally know who he is. Who doesn't know who Stanley Tucci is?

Some gays out there, some people might. Okay, so Sean is weighing in and saying, before we get into Stanley Tucci too much more, he wants us to know that skeleton is a winter sport featured in the Winter Olympics where the competitor rides headfirst and pro... Okay, this is, I thought this is what it was. Headfirst face down on a flat sled, normally run on an ice track that allows the sled to gain speed by gravity. So this is like one of those like,

True death sleds. This is like the luge. Yeah, it's like luge, but luge you lay on your back with your... Right. So your head is back. The only difference is you're laying on your god darn stomach.

face-first skeleton. Can you imagine? There's something about lying on your stomach as you barrel down a mountain slope that makes it feel at least a million times more dangerous than if you were just lying on your back. First of all, I'd rather be on my stomach than on my back, and I'll just say that. I'm just gonna leave that there. I'd rather be on my back than my stomach. Really? Stop. Bowen, stop. Stop. Stop.

Bowen, stop it. I'm serious. If you don't stop. Stop it now. Stop. Other smaller changes have been made to some of the events themselves, including for the first time ever. Men and women will race the same distance across the cross-country skiing competition. Thank God. Equality at last. We have achieved...

Total equality across the genders. We need equality. We need parity. We need cross-country distance parity now. And we will have it in Milan for the first time. I can't believe that. Men and women's legs are the same. You cannot dispute that. I see some AMABs out there with more feminine legs than the AFABs. And I see some AFABs with meaty, muscly legs. And I go, go off. All legs, all legs, equal.

What else? The ski jumping team format has reduced from four athletes to two with competition held over three rounds. You know, there's a lot different. And,

And just to speak about what's going to be going down in terms of the culture, Milan will host the opening ceremony as well as figure skating, hockey, short track and speed skating. And then all across a bunch of other cities is going to be different events. So we're talking Milan, Livigno, Bormio, Tesero, Predazzo, Antoselva, Verona. Am I saying all this correctly? I think you are. Bravo. Bravissimo to Matt Rogers for that.

Beautiful Italian pronunciation. Verona, do you think Romeo and Juliet will make an appearance? I think so. So Verona is hosting the closing ceremony of both the Olympic and Paralympic Winter Games. So Milan will host the opening. Verona will host the closing. And we better see some Romeo and Juliet play. And what about Milan? I want to see Donatella...

strut down the runway. Gaga again. Gaga again. Let me just say this out loud just because I know what happens when we do. Often these things will just end up happening. Lady Gaga is just an Italian girl from New York.

So why would you not send her to Italy to be part of the games? I mean, she is an Italian girl. That's number one. She was in a ski outfit in House of Gucci. She knows what it's like to be on the mountains. She knows all about it. She's been there and back. We need to watch House of Gucci again. I don't know that we do. Oh, wow.

Let's talk about some athletes to watch. From USA, we have Isabeau Levito in figure skating. She'll be just a week shy of her 19th birthday during the 2026 Games, so that means right now she is 17. Wow. And it's going to be held in the hometown of her mother, Kiara Garberry Levito, who was raised Isabeau as a single parent. Levito is the 2022 World Junior Champion, 2023 U.S. Champion, 2024 World Silver Medalist in the senior ranks. I

I think the name on everyone's lips is going to be Isabeau. Isabeau. I mean, that's a great name. Are you kidding me? We are going to be hearing Isabeau Levito. Like, that is going to be the name on everyone's lips. It's too good. To say nothing of Ilya Malinin. Ilya Malinin. Figure skater as well. The reigning world champion and two-time reigning U.S. champion. Malinin will be 21 years old during the 2026 Milan Cortina Winter Games. Malinin is the only skater ever to land a quadruple axel. The

The most difficult jump ever attempted. I didn't think it was possible. It's giving Simone Biles, which has four and a half rotations. Okay? He is coached by his parents, Roman Skornyakov and Tatyana Melaninina.

Both figure skaters for Uzbekistan at the 1998 and 2002 Winter Games. Tatyala Milenina is also the 1998 Grand Prix final and 99 Four Continents champion. And her father, Ilya's maternal grandfather, Valery Milenin, is also a coach. This is giving, I'm sorry, Nepo Baby, but when a Nepo Baby can do a quadruple axel, it doesn't matter. Competing for the U.S., we should say. Competing for the U.S., of course. The land of Nepo Babies. Oh, yeah. It's our number one export.

But Ilya, if this man could do a quadruple axel, he can say... I bet he can. He can't. Maybe if he's gay. A lot of these figure skaters, I'm like, why are you straight? There's so many straight male figure skaters. That's a lie. No, no. I think Ilya... Let's see. My favorite figure skaters ever were the Canadian couple...

Remember who they were? They were robbed of their gold medal. So then they ended up getting one because the Russian judge was cheating or no, the French judge was cheating. Yeah, the French judge was cheating. And so they were they were. And I remember they I remember hearing that they were together and I was like, oh, my God. Wow. But then they've since broken up. Did you know that? Oh, wow.

Well, anyway, Jordan Stoltz is a speed skater from the USA. Stoltz, who will be 21 years old during the 2026 Milan Cortina Winter Games, is the youngest ever single distance world champion in history. Stoltz first tried speed skating on the frozen pond behind the family's house. After watching our icon Apollo Anton Ono compete at the 2010 Vancouver Winter Olympics. And let's just say

many young people were inspired watching Apollo Ant on Oh No! at that Olympics. I'll let people fill in the blanks there. Yes. Yes. Inspired to do all kinds of athletic feats. Yep. Getting physical. Oh, we

We've got Jesse Dickinson, cross-country skiing, the most accomplished U.S. cross-country skier in history with three Olympic medals, two overall World Cup titles, six championship medals. Michaela Schifrin, also for USA, alpine skiing. Having amassed 97 World Cup wins at the end of the 2023-24 World Cup season, Michaela Schifrin is the winningest alpine skier of all time, male or female. She's the first athlete in the history of the World Cup to win in all six disciplines.

slalom giant slalom parallel slalom alpine combined super g and downhill chiffrin's mom is eileen served as her daughter's first coach and still works with michaela to this day i have to say all these names have like star quality yeah michaela chiffrin jesse diggins jordan stultz isabella vito

Come on. Come on. Isabeau? Isabeau. I'm not over it. I'm still not over Isabeau. Isabeau is the one to watch. And let's just say there might be a new sort of Adam Rippon figure. I hope for a new Johnny Weir Adam Rippon. I want a new gay icon to come out of this Winter Games. Yeah.

I also have to say, while we're so excited about the 2026 Milan Cortina Games, it really like... I think we've discussed it on the podcast before, but we continue to wrap our heads around how the Los Angeles Olympics in 2028, the Summer Olympics in 2028 are going to happen because...

Bowen literally was driving yesterday in LA on a Monday afternoon, like when there was supposed to be no traffic and it was hellish. It's like, I give it all up to God when it comes to logistically figuring out the 2028 Summer Olympic Games, because there's so many reasons for us to see greatness and glory. But I wonder if we're going to be seeing just traffic and pain. I'm going to say this. Let's say volleyball is...

is supposed to start at 11 a.m. on a Tuesday. Let's say on the west side. Roll the cameras. No one's in the seats. Athletes aren't even there. What's the actual start time, you think? What time do you think people will actually start playing if it's at 11 a.m.? Noon? No. That is so generous. 2.30, 3 o'clock? Yes.

It's Los Angeles we're talking about. Let me tell you something, especially because all of these venues are going to be used at the same time.

Just go with me here. Last week, I went to the Olivia Rodrigo concert at the Kia Forum. There was also a football game happening at SoFi Stadium. And also down the block, I believe that Bruno Mars was performing. There was no way to move in any direction. So anyway, there are tons of venues that are going to be used across the city. They're just all going to be used at pretty much the same time.

And the city's not made for it. But, you know, Karen Bass, we're going to see. We're going to see. Karen Bass, we have faith in you. The nice, sustainable thing is that there are no new venues built. I think that's the historic thing. First time in Olympic history that no new permanent venues will be built. And I want to talk really quickly about the new sports that will be added. Breaking will unfortunately not return, but... Oh, it's officially not returning? It's officially not returning. ♪

Here are the new sports on the Olympic program, baseball and softball. They have been part of several Olympic games, most recently in 2020. So they took one Olympic game off in the summer. Now they're going to be back for 2028. Cricket makes a second Olympic appearance, returning after an absence of 128 years. Last time, if you do the math, was in 1900 in Paris. What else do we have?

Lacrosse, similar to cricket, lacrosse returns to the Olympics after more than a century, but this time in a faster paced sixes format on a smaller field, sort of akin to rugby sevens. Lacrosse and its traditional tennis side format was a metal sport in both the 1904 and 1908 Olympic games. It also was a demonstration sport in the 1928, 1932 and 1948 Olympics. It's honestly so shocking to me that lacrosse hasn't been a part of the Olympic conversation because lacrosse

It's such a good sport. Growing up on Long Island, I don't know if lacrosse was huge. Honey, Colorado had the Mammoth. The team was called the Mammoth, and those games were electrifying. Okay.

Yeah. No, lacrosse is no joke to the point where even me, someone that like was not I would have had no impulse to play. I had a lacrosse stick and really tried to get good at it because it was taking over the culture. So honestly, that's like a blind spot for me that I did not know that lacrosse wasn't just always a thing. Maybe we were just from two areas that really embraced it. Yeah, I think so.

I think so. But it's a fun, it's a great sport. I'm very happy that it's returning to LA. Flag football making its Olympic debut. Very, very, very cool. Yeah. And we got squash. Squashly making its Olympic debut in LA. Although squash was a demonstration sport at the 2018 Youth Olympic Games in Buenos Aires. Buenos Aires. P.

Paraclimbing has been added to the Paralympic Games sports program, bringing the total number of Paralympic sports to 23. Aside from the new sports, new events on the program, coastal rowing, beach sprint format. Meanwhile, the modern pentathlon events will no longer include the equestrian discipline and instead feature obstacle racing. I mean...

pentathlon crazy concepts. Oh, yeah. You got to ride a horse, too. Wait, what? Now you don't anymore. No longer will include the equestrian discipline, but you got to do obstacle racing, which is, wow. I mean, listen, I'm not a child, and the concept of an obstacle course doesn't do what it used to do to me. You used to be able to say the word obstacle course to me, and I'd be like, let's go. But not anymore? I loved obstacles. Now I'm kind of just like...

Less obstacles. I'll do a course.

I'll do a course. I'll do a regular course. All my obstacles are up here. I'm pointing to my head. Exactly. Mental. Did you know I did? One of my track events was the steeplechase. Do you know what that is? Yes. I did the steeplechase like three years in a row. It's a distance race on the track. It's like usually 3,200 meters, but you have to do a hurdle. Two hurdles. One is a regular hurdle and one is a hurdle that you like you step up on the hurdle and use it to jump over a tiny little water hazard. And then you have to do a steeplechase.

And you get a little wet when you do it. And I remember I was so excited to do this and it was by far the hardest thing I've ever seen. Wow. At the time. At the time, physically, I was like, wow, that was so much harder because you think about running two miles in general, it sounds difficult. Now, Ad, you got to jump over a damn lake. And honey, that's bringing your mile time up at least, if there's a lake involved, at least two minutes. You're adding big seconds. And for the last time,

What was your mile? My mile time in high school was 436. Wow. Wow.

I'm going to miss hearing you say that. Maybe I'll just have to keep saying it. But no. Listen, before we close this podcast out, this season of Two Guys, Five Rings comes to a close. I want to know, in terms of the opening ceremony, what do you want to see in LA? Just draw up your perfect program. Who performs and what does it look like? I'm just thinking out loud. I want a...

Bears in Space moment. I want Ackbar to have a whole sort of like moment during the opening ceremonies. I want...

I just want the floor to be dirty and carpeted for that time. I want the theme of the LA Olympics opening ceremony to be dirty carpeted floors, which is an LA thing. It's not a New York thing. Specifically, it's LA. I'm staying at the Chateau Marmont right now. Dirty carpets are everywhere. Um,

And let's see, I want Gwen Stefani to come out and do her Christmas songs. Because why not? That'd be kind of fun. I want... Oh, no doubt would be amazing, actually. I mean, like, I just saw them in Coachella. They were incredible. No doubt as an opening ceremony in LA would be really good. Yeah. I want there to be a Joan Didion retrospective as performed by... Katie Parham? Haim.

Katy Perry. I'm sorry. Yes, Katy Perry. I think Haim should have a moment. Katy Perry featuring Haim. Doing Joan of Arc. Katy Perry featuring Haim. Yes. What about you? I agree with everything you said. Nothing additive? Let me think. I want the person who shot... Miley. Party in the USA. Party in the USA. Yeah, it's party in the USA.

That would make it perfect. And I also think it's the perfect way for us to end with that wish, this podcast. You are truly my sister in sports. I didn't know you were beforehand, but now I know you are. Do you have anything to say to me? You are truly my sister in international relations because sports and international relations are what the Olympics and Paralympics are about.

And I have had the privilege of traveling to international destinations with you. I see your character come through. I see your curiosity open. I see your spirit just receive the wonders of this planet. And that is also what the Olympics are about. And I've had so much fun. I've had so much fun with you. Let me tell you something. You and I, we are an international relation.

And that is a rule of culture. It is rule of culture number 100. You and I are an international relation. This has been and will continue to be Two Guys, Five Rings.

Thank you so much for listening. You can follow Two Guys, Five Rings on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite podcast platform. And be sure to watch the 2024 Paris Paralympic Games, August 28th to September 8th on NBC and Peacock. We end every episode with a song. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.