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Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring. I still laugh when we do it. I love ring, ring, ring, ring, ring.
And you know what? There's nothing specific to Paris about them. Like, we're going to do this for Milan for 2026, assuming they'll have us back. We're going to do this for Los Angeles in 2028. We're going to do this in Salt Lake City in 2030. The list goes on. Can I say, not me having LA pride right now.
Okay, so are we changing our tune now on the LA Olympics of it all? A little bit. Like, I don't know. So I've been kind of on the fence about the Olympics in LA in 2028 of it all because I live here and I'm telling you it's not necessarily infrastructure-wise tenable to have more people here. But I will say the cultural, you know, moment that was the handoff
was a lot of fun. And I was like, you know, it is fun to have the Olympics in LA. I mean, like in terms of the way that they rolled it out. Maybe I just like Words of a Feather by Billie Eilish that much. Maybe it's just that. I got emotional seeing Dr. Dre up there. TBH. It was cool. It was cool. That was cool.
Yeah. Well, you know, we're getting so ahead of ourselves. Let's get to the two guys stuff first. Okay. I mean, maybe this all kind of coincides. This feels like two guys. I mean, us essentially making it about a pop girly immediately. Immediately. Even Dr. Dre. And I haven't even started on Anthony Kiedis and how hot he is. So we're in two guys land. I knew you were going to talk about Anthony.
I mean, to say nothing of the Long Beach of it all. That was a Long Beach show. And the vibe was very spring break Cancun, but we're in LA. Oh, right. We're in LA. But, um, yeah. Oh my gosh, Matt, how do you feel now that we've closed out the 2024 Olympic Games? And I just want to correct myself. 2030 is going to be in the French Alps. We're going to be back in France in 2030. 2034 is going to be Salt Lake City.
So I was kind of surprised that they're returning to Salt Lake City so soon because I feel like we were just there because we were. 2002, it was 32 years ago. I mean, it is 22 years ago from today, but it will be 32 years from the last Salt Lake City Games season.
Yeah, wow. Old. We're going to be old. We're going to be old. But I feel great. I think this was an amazing Olympics. I think, you know, holistically, not only were they largely and roundly triumphant for the people that we were rooting for, with notable exceptions, which we'll get into, but also, you know,
But I have to commend the presentation of the Olympics themselves by NBC Peacock. I mean, the multi-view option. And iHeartRadio. And iHeartRadio. I mean, just like overall, like this was easy to watch. You never felt like you were really missing anything. And I thought everything was executed really well. And in terms of Paris as the host, I thought...
They did an amazing job and it felt really seamless. It felt like a real celebration of their culture. At moments, it felt very specific and niche, but also global in that weird French way. The humor was there. The vibes were there. It felt like a real success to me.
And they did it their way. That song is so New York coded to me. To close it out with my way. Parisian. That's funny. Iso. She's amazing. Incredible. Incredible. She's very good. Iso. Okay. I must agree with you. I could not have put it better myself. I won't even attempt to. But wow. Just give it a shot. Okay. Well, I'm going to make another retraction right now. Okay. Okay.
I remember saying after the opening ceremony, I wish it was in a stadium. I like that there was a balance because otherwise it would have felt redundant if both closing and opening were going to be in Stade de France. I like either. I like one stadium either in the opening and I like a closing. I think one, it should be one of each. Yeah. One in a stadium, one incorporating some processional aspect or some spatially distinct thing of the host city.
Paris, I think, reinvigorated the Olympics for the world. Tokyo, it was never going to really pop off, of course, with COVID. I don't even... I don't remember getting into Rio that much, as much as I did with this. You know, I would agree. I think this was the most successful... You felt like there was some international pride to be had, whatever that means. It felt like...
You know what I'm saying? It felt largely positive. And I look back on that opening ceremony fondly as well. I agree with you. Me too. So I take that back. But I will say...
Let's send up another Voyager spaceship and let's put in the Simone Biles, Jordan Childs bowing to Rebecca Andrade moment again. I'm still not over this. That is, I maintain, that is the best of what humanity has to offer in that moment. Sportsmanship, triumph, support, international relations, peace. And we'll get into Jordan Childs later. But overall, an incredible, incredible two weeks.
I'm very sad that it's over. And I cannot say that about an Olympics since Beijing. Yeah, this was great. I mean, I will also say just... And they did it. Like I said, we touched on it briefly, but why not touch on it more? Because this is technically like we're supposed to be recapping the closing ceremony here. But like, I was really surprised...
I had heard about the Tom Cruise of it all. And then I was surprised to really enjoy it. You know what I mean? Like, I was like, hey, when when they showed him on top of that stadium and he looked back over his shoulder and then jumped off of it. I'm like, yeah, I mean, this is the sort of maximalist L.A. Hollywood Olympics that if we're going to go for it, if we're going to have the Olympics in L.A., Tom Cruise should be jumping off a ship.
You know what I mean? Like he should be, we should see his LA plastic surgery. It should be that we should be unapologetic about it pulled tight. Um, but literally watching Tom, I was like, okay, this is warped in several different ways, but he is definitely good at holding that frame, babe. I mean, he is the Hollywood star. He is, he's looking good. He's wearing the hell out of those pants.
loved that he was running up the ramp and didn't want to run like the five steps more to clear the ramp. He hopped up off the ramp onto the platform. He hopped the ramp to say hello to Karen Bass. And Karen Bass, I mean, that's my mayor right there. And to know that she was on the global stage, loved that. Loved that they had Simone doing the handoff. I mean, Simone is the superstar of the Olympics. I think there's no dispute there. And then when he sped off and made it to Hollywood so fast on that little bike,
And, you know, the rings were up on the Hollywood sign. I said, this could be fun. This could be a lot of fun. And then I loved everything that happened in Long Beach, including the beach volleyball players that were just there chilling while Billy was performing. I love that they just continued their game. I love that. And Billy was really into it. I think...
One of the first few live performances of Birds of a Feather. Yeah, I mean, there was a lip sync track, definitely. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that's just a production thing. Her live vocal is so good. And of course, I mean, I'm telling you, what is this, Lost Cult? I was at Coachella when she came out for Lana Del Rey and Billie's voice live. It's very special. Very special, girl. And you know it from SNL.
Of course. We all know it from Oscars twice over. Yeah. I'm just saying being in the room is cool. So to have been on that beach, I mean, shame on those beach volleyball players for continuing to bump and set because a legend was singing. A legend was singing, but that's okay. Volleyball stops for no one. We will see that in four years. I want them to do fencing in front of Pache. Oh, that would be amazing. Wow. That would be hard. It's very hilly over there. Yeah. But you know, um,
We need to reopen the Arclight. How about that? First of all, this is why I say New York came back after the pandemic and LA never did because as long as the Arclight in LA is closed, LA is not working. We don't have a working city until that Arclight is open again. And we need to do it. What are your thoughts on
Speaking of Karen Bass, ambitious, ambitious. I think this is impossible, but I love to be proven wrong. No car Olympics in 2028. She wants this is Los Angeles wants everyone. The influx of hundreds of thousands of tourists coming in.
She wants everyone to be able to access every Olympic venue through public transit. Right now, public transit in Los Angeles, not in a good place. I think we can all agree. Unhoused population, terrible place.
It's going to be tough. But look, I really, I pray. At the end of the day, we love Los Angeles on Two Guys, Five Rings. I mean, what's going to have to happen is they're going to have to change almost everything. And I think that they are. I think that public transit is about to like, they're really going to make a go for it here in the next couple of years in terms of public transit. Four years is not a long time for this kind of infrastructure stuff.
I mean, literally, they're going to have to change a lot because I'm like, you can't even drive on a Tuesday in the afternoon. Love LA. Love what it can be.
And yes, I have a lot to say about this, as you can tell, as I'm sure you do as well. So everyone, including Karen Bass, can just wait. We have lots of ideas and feelings. Let's go back. The closing ceremonies were great. I loved watching all the athletes vibe. It's a party. The shoulders are dropped. It's done. The count is over. By the way, congratulations to the United States of America for most medals and tied with gold with China.
I mean, this is the thing I'll miss most about the Olympics. The only moment of acceptable nationalism that we as Americans can experience. Well, let's hope not. For now, this is... I do feel refreshed. I miss this feeling of loving country. And I have not had this feeling in a while. And I certainly felt that way the entire time during these Olympic Games. ♪
Speaking of national pride, let's talk about these medals. So 40 Olympic gold medals for the United States of America, 44 silver, 42 bronze, 126 total, followed by China with 91 total medals and 40 gold medals. Then we have Great Britain with 65 total medals. And, you know, France at 64, they hung in there. But really, it was about the U.S. It was about us. I mean, listen, hate us because they ain't us. Yeah.
main character syndrome has never been more apparent. USA has main character syndrome in such a way. And if this was our other podcast, this would be a rule of culture, but we can't. We just can't. Let's see. I really quickly just want to go back to the closing ceremonies, though. A lot of gags besides the LA handoff.
Phoenix loved seeing Phoenix sing their hits from 1999 or from 2000 was their first album. That hanging piano, that vertical piano. Did you clock that? I sure did. Miss Mama playing the piano while being dragged up.
And the Golden Voyager running around in his little Cirque du Soleil ass. I know that's French Canada, but in his Cirque du Soleil ass getup with all those hot little statuesque dancers. I think some of those were some of the breakers. I think Ray Gunn was in there somewhere. Wait, can we talk about the breaking? Let's talk about the breaking. We're just jumping all around. Let's talk about breaking. Come on. That was flop to me. Oh, brother. Yeah.
And now he said it. I don't need breaking. I get why it was concluded. That might be the only time we see it, but I'm happy. Look, this is the thing about the Olympics.
They try new things. Okay. Everyone thinks it's a stead institutional thing, which it is in a lot of ways, but this was the first Olympics to have full gender parity. It was a younger, more inclusive, more sustainable Olympics. It is forward thinking in this way. It has room for something like breaking, even though mixed results, but,
A viral internet worthy, sticky, you know, in the internet sense, sticky stories out of that. Ray Gunn will forever be a legend. And she has, I think, a beautiful attitude about this. I mean, she couldn't help that it was an event and that she qualified for it. You know what I mean? It's like, here's the thing. If you never try...
Sure, you'll never fail, but you'll never succeed. And she is an Olympian. That is something that she will be for the rest of her life. And I just want to say, let's just get into it. So for those of you who may be living under a rock in terms of the breaking of it all, we're talking about Australian breakdancer Rachel Gunn, a.k.a. Ray Gunn, iconic.
has caused quite a stir on social media after a performance at the 2024 Paris Olympics. Breaking, more commonly known as breakdancing, made its debut, as we all know, and Gunn went viral online after her performance on Friday in the round-robin stage of the women's breaking competition. She was swept out without earning a single point. Gunn defended her dance moves. She, um... She tried to wow the audience with a kangaroo dance, among other moves, but she has no qualms about the performance.
being quoted as saying, I was never going to beat these girls on what they do best, their power moves. What I bring is creativity. We all have a kangaroo dance in our hearts. Period! It goes like this. Ha ha ha!
Oh, my God. Wait, the apple dance sort of is giving kangaroo. I think she was inspired by the apple dance. Maybe she was. Had she come out there and done the apple dance, maybe she would have gotten a point. What if the apple dance, when Charlie XCX says, I think the apple's rotten right to the core. What if the apple is an internet culture? I think she was talking about the judges, the gymnastics judges. Oh, my God. What a perfect segue. Yeah.
That sucks. And can I say, like, Jordan Childs, they could never make you not my bronze medalist. These Romanian girls, bless them, would not have bowed to Rebecca. And that is still the thing that I think is the most important thing to come out of these games. The medals, LeBron, Steph Curry, we love, Shaqiri, we'll talk about all these things. That is the moment for me of this entire Olympics. Jordan Childs was a huge part of that.
We're talking about a four-second window. Let's just summarize what's happening for people who don't know. Yes. So, the U.S. is appealing a ruling that has forced Jordan Childs to return her bronze medal. Basically, U.S. coach Cecile Landy sent in an appeal, what people are saying, four seconds after the one-minute time limit for scoring inquiry. She sent in an inquiry a minute and four seconds after Jordan left the floor.
CIS, Court of Arbitration for Sport, which handles these inquiries and these appeals, has now got ahead and said that Jordan has to return her medal. I think they have the last word on it. Jordan is taking a big break from social media. It's so devastating. And this process is maybe months, years long.
We really hope this does not demoralize Jordan to such a level that would discourage her from competing again. She has such a bright future. That would be insane. Well, that's up to her. You know, but you know what? And not to like produce, have producer brain too much on this, but this is an amazing story going into LA 2028.
Not an amazing story. We wish it didn't happen. But this is something that is another opportunity for triumph, even though it is devastating right now. We are all feeling for Jordan. There are, frankly, some racist attacks going on on the internet against her from, let's just say, like, corners of the internet, internationally speaking. But yeah, it's really unfortunate. The International Gymnastics Federation, FIG, said...
On Saturday, it would respect the court's decision and elevate Anna Barbosu of Romania to third. IOC confirmed the ruling on Sunday. Before the closing ceremony, it is reallocating the medal. It feels like this is one of those moments where you give them both the bronze medal and like, this just feels ugly. And just, I don't know. Everyone's Steve Harvey in this situation.
And then these are, you know, all of these girls are the Miss Universes. It's like, you can't do this. And Jordan, age-wise, will definitely be back, right? Absolutely. Because this, I guess, I mean, we'll get into the athletes who are announcing retirements in a second, but...
You know, there's precedent for her to come back and slay it off again. You know, I would love for her to come around, like work her f***ing ass off and come around and slay the all around. Like, I think this, you're right. There is like a ready-made narrative here for an amazing Olympic story. But wow, the pressure of that and the disappointment of this moment is probably a lot. I hope she does take care of herself. Clearly she is.
Yeah, but this is that thing. Remember we said in the very first episode of this, like the pressure of this is so intense. And, you know, I recently watched Simone Biles on the Call Her Daddy podcast with fellow Olympic podcaster Alex Cooper. And she was going on at length about how when she like had her sort of moment in Tokyo where she had to pull herself out, one of the first things she was thinking about in the midst of her sort of like
downturn was what is Twitter saying? Like that is something that is really on the minds of these athletes now. Like,
These people are not only on the world stage, but they're on the world stage in the year of our Lord 2024. And they're young and they're online. I mean, you see these girls after they get off, like when they stop, finish their medals, they immediately flock to each other and talk about what TikToks they're going to do. You know, like they are not immune to the intense pressure, of course, that comes with any competition, especially on a global stage, but also the mindset.
that is being talked about and dissected and, you know, disrespected on social media regularly. So my thing with Jordan is she's got to go to great lengths to make sure that she has mental clarity because everyone's obviously got something to say about this and they would anyway. So just hoping the best for her because she deserves it. I mean, how many times did we jump out of our chair watching her compete? Like she's a true superstar. Yeah.
And we love you, Jordan, if you're listening. We know you are. Other wonderful things that have happened since our last episode. Sha'Carri! I can take this. Sha'Carri Richardson secured her first Olympic gold medal after a thundering anchor leg in the women's 4x1 relay on Friday. Oh, the anchor leg of a relay bow. You ever watch one live? Never. One day I'll take you to a track meet. Oh, by the way, I have to update everyone.
I know I said in the last episode of Two Guys, Five Rings that I was going to find a track in L.A. and I was going to see what my mile time is now because as we know, when it was in high school, it was blistering four minutes and 36 seconds. Wow. It is incredibly hard to find a public 400 meter track here in L.A. I've even asked noted...
runner pat reagan about it and he said it's like almost impossible so this may have to be a storyline that gets followed over into lost culture is this so if you are someone who just listens to two guys five rings you're a two guys five rings head please join us on our podcast we would love to have your listenership your readership even and it is there that i will close the loop so to speak on uh
my mile time as of today. Are you Tom Cruise? Because that handoff was excellent. I mean, call me Sha'Carri.
because she carried us to a gold medal in the four by one. So the Americans, which are Sha'Carri Richardson, Gabby Thomas, who, by the way, took the gold to 200 and amazing, amazing. Melissa Jefferson and Tanisha Terry braved a wet track in rainy conditions to win the team's 12th Olympic medal in the event. They did it in a time of 41.78 seconds, a season best. Thomas ran the third leg and got her second gold medal in the games. Like I said, her first gold medal was in the 200 meters, which was amazing to watch.
And when Thomas handed off to Richardson, the U.S. was in third place. Richardson had to reel in Britain's Daryl Nita and Germany's Rebecca Haas. And when she did, she flashed a look to her right and backward that said, you ain't catching me. It marked a sweet close to the Olympics for Richardson, who came into the Olympics as a favorite, but surprisingly fell to Julian Alfrid of St. Lucia in the 100 meter race.
So Sha'Carri Richardson gets her well-deserved gold medal and an iconic moment of looking over her shoulder at her competitor and saying, so we love Sha'Carri. You did it. Wish fulfillment fulfilled.
Go off. We hope you are getting the manicure of your life right now. Now, women's basketball and men's basketball, both winning, both golds going to the U.S., beating France for both now. Really amazing stuff.
I was kind of into the basketball this time in the Olympics. Love basketball. Love basketball. Steph Curry and LeBron James screaming into each other's faces. I said kiss, but that's just my fanfic. Can you imagine? That would be amazing if they kissed. But I'm a fan of we just stick together. I mean, I think that is LeBron's...
Second most memeable moment in his life. The first will always be, can't believe this is my life, just smiling through it all. Can't believe this is my life. My life, just smiling through it all. Can we just flash that just on the Insta reel right now? You know I want a soundboard so bad. I've wanted a soundboard forever.
Anyway, that's also a narrative that will carry over. So we mentioned it earlier, but several Olympians will retire after Paris, including the legendary Simone Biles, who at 27 was the oldest woman to make an Olympics gymnastics team since the 1950s, will be retiring. However, Biles did speak to Hoda
the legend Hoda, about her future in the sport and if she's considering competing at the next Summer Games in LA in 2028, to which she said, you know, never say never. The next Olympics is on home turf, so you just never know. I'm just going to relax and see where life takes me. And...
She really should just relax. I mean, like she's done so much. She's earned it. I would love to see her commentate. Oh my gosh. Are you kidding me? Yeah. I love watching her talk. Like I said, I love that interview. The call her daddy interview. That was great. Like she's very telegenic.
Oh, incredibly so. Gosh, I'm really emotional. But you know, there are some fun things to carry us over into the Paralympics. There are some fun things to carry over into Winter Olympics in Milan and also the Summer Olympic Games in Los Angeles, as we mentioned. All right, Matt, let's quickly give out our medals and close out this wonderful episode as we cover the closing ceremonies. I'm going to give bronze to...
I'm gonna give bronze to Sha'Carri. What a moment.
- That's a great moment. The looking over the shoulder, the unbotheredness of it, the personality in there. We love it. - We love it. There's so much going on. That is a sort of almost lab grown Olympic moment that I just love. And it's Sha'Carri who is such a perfect icon for this 2024 Olympic Games of like, you know, perfectly reflecting of the time that we're in. What's your silver?
My silver medal goes to Anthony Kiedis, who was performing in a boot. Something happened to his left foot, which doesn't surprise me at all. Anthony Kiedis of the Red Hot Chili Peppers strikes me as someone who often does something that hurts his left foot.
And I have to say that, by the way, his autobiography, Scar Tissue, one of the greats, one of the great celebrity memoirs. Oh, I love Anthony Kiedis. You don't have to tell me twice. I love anyone who's that hot, that stupid, that talented, and that able to still get up there and do his thing in a boot. And if you don't think he took his mesh tank and put it over his head so he couldn't see and showed his belly and torso and walked around that stage in a boot, putting himself at high risk to hurt his right foot,
You'd be mistaken. Legend, and he wins my silver medal. There's a benevolent sort of masculinity there that's reminiscent of jackass. I think there's that sort of world that I'm really, really hopeful about. No notes. These should be the men who lead us forward. And our gold is going to... I think we're going to break this tie between the US and China for most golds.
And we're going to give the gold to the United States of America. The gold medal is won by the U.S. And when her sang the Star Spangled Banner...
I said acceptable nationalism. I said I am proud to be an American where at least I think I'm free. Yep. Well, I changed the word no to think because sometimes the illusion of freedom is better than nothing. Wow. Yeah. Her really shreds on that guitar, too. Good for her because gosh,
Still very early in her career, Oscar winner, Grammy winner, got to perform at the Olympics. Adele introduced her at SNL. And she was Belle in the live action Beauty and the Beast. So that's part of the EGOT, I'm sure. I think if you arrange the letters of that, you get EGOT.
Yeah. Beauty and the Beast tea. Any other thoughts? I hope it's not the last time we see breaking. I want everyone to still... You took it back? No, I'm taking it back. I want everyone to see what happened in the breaking competition. And I think that people should feel inspired. And I do still think we should add singing, which brings me to Celine. And I think Celine should be an Olympic gold medalist for singing. And that's where I'll keep it. Absolutely. Now...
I just want to say the thing we're not pointing out about Ray Gunn is that this entire situation is like a 2007 comedy movie starring Chris Lilley. Yeah. Like someone who qualifies to be the Australian breaking representative. And it's, it's, it's someone doing Chris Lilley moves. Yeah. As Mr. G in Summer Heights High. Um, this would have been like,
Vince Vaughn film in 2004. You know, like, it's amazing. Like, let's just, let's just like appreciate this moment. Like, it's really, it's kind of fun. And like, God, thank goodness that she has the right attitude about it. I'm sure she's like, I'm sure there's a level of embarrassment, but like, internationally, I mean, this is the other thing about the Olympics this year is
This is our first genuine monoculture in a long time. And I think this is a very good moment for monoculture. And this makes the case that sports is culture. And we should probably talk about sports more on LotsCult. Maybe.
I think the Olympics had a brat summer. Let's just say that. Let's just say that. It's so funny that you mentioned Vince Vaughn because I was just walking back from Barry's and Vince Vaughn is getting a Hollywood star on the Walk of Fame today and they were set up. And so it's like, that was such an LA thing. And that is so LA 2020 Olympics coded, like the Hollywoodness of it all. Barry's Bootcamp is so... I hope Barry's has a huge moment at the opening ceremony.
Oh, yeah. I want Kyle K to light the torch. Kyle K is my favorite Barry's instructor. Shout out, Kyle K. Love you. I want Ian McAndrew, who's my favorite Barry's instructor. Well, sorry. No, that's New York. That's too New York. Damn it. We love Ian, though. We love him.
Okay, so you guys can follow Two Guys, Five Rings on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite podcast platform. And be sure to watch the 2024 Paris Paralympic Games, August 28th to September 8th on NBC and Peacock. And let's close out with a song. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do,
