Episode V: Historic Olympic Moments with Bowen and Matt
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Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring!

Wow, that sound of rings, five of them, means another episode of the Two Guys, Five Rings podcast. Well, we start with the five rings, then we go to two guys, and then we do another bread in the sandwich of five rings. Do we start with five rings and then go to two guys, or do we start with two guys and then go to five rings? Well, I'm saying we literally start by saying five rings. You're right. Oh my God, wow. I didn't even think about how this podcast is just like-

I'm sorry to turn you off. This podcast is just like what? It's like a game of really Olympic sport beach volleyball. You know what I mean? Back and forth and forth and back. The ball goes. Oh my God. The ball goes and the men die. And that's on podcasting. That's on podcasting. Now, Matt, let's just catch up. Yes. We...

This is our first time checking in with each other since the podcast is sort of making waves. Taken off. Has taken off in such a way. Yeah, no, this podcast is now a cultural institution in its own right. Things have really taken off, thank God. And I think since I last saw you, I guess my big headline is I went on a little vacation. I went to the Poconos where I took port in...

Took port. I took port. Where I took port in some Olympic sports. I did golf. I watched beach volleyball happen. I saw some sailing happen, but I did golf. I played golf. That's amazing. Do you feel like an Olympian in a way? Certainly no. No.

I think in order to feel like an Olympian in golf, you'd have to be able to hit a drive. Do you know what that is? Do you know golf at all? I couldn't. I can tell you what...

A mulligan is, I think. Well, you're better than me. What is a mulligan? Outside of being the surname of the great actress Carrie. A mulligan is... He's looking it up, everyone, so he can't actually tell me. So yeah, I couldn't tell you. A mulligan is a second chance to perform an action, usually after the first chance went wrong. So a mulligan in golf where the player is allowed to replay a stroke. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

I'm going to say I mulligan all the time. Repeated mulligans. Repeated. I replay a stroke every day. Oh, honey. Replaying strokes till I can't breathe. Girl, I wish you could mulligan in dating. Oh, babe. Let's let's let me just go redo redo. Yeah, this is the two guys section and two single guys. Oh, brother.

Would you be intimidated to date an Olympian? Like if an Olympian got in the DMs and was like, hey, it's me, Olympic bronze, silver, gold medalist. That would really matter. Can I reveal something? Yeah. I don't think he was an Olympian. But he... No, I think he was... An ice dancer for Canada. Yep. Okay. No, not who you're thinking. That's another guy who's in everyone's DMs. Ah!

Our very own Olympic trials. This is another ice dancer. And he's very funny. He might even be listening to this very podcast. And we say shout out. So the Olympians, you're out there. I would be intimidated. To answer your question, yes. Because I have done the thought experiment and went,

I'm not worthy. This is one of our great athletic powers in the world. Athletic minds. This is one of our great athletic minds. I've been on a date with one of our great athletic minds and I did have to talk myself up for it. I was like, I'm nervous. I'm nervous. This is an Olympian. And then guess what? They're just guys. They're just guys. They're just gals. They're just regular folks like us. So that's what it,

One of the things I want to set an intention for as we start to watch the Olympics is, guys, these are just people. These are just people, just like you and I. And you have a chance with each and every one of them. I want to tell the audience that. You have a chance with each. If you are watching the Olympics this year and going,

I want to take that one out to dinner. You can. You can do it. Reach out. Of course. Don't make it uncomfortable. Don't make it weird. Don't make it weird ever. But you know, shoot your shot. Come as the guy on screen. As Taylor Swift once said. Wow. But we got to bring it back to Paris. We got to bring it back to Paris. We got to bring it back to Paris. Our producers will be telling us. Bye.

Well, first of all, since the introduction of this podcast as a cultural institution, we can reveal at this time that Matt and I are maybe being offered a spot on the IOC. And we might have a hand in picking out the next city. Where would be your ideal spot? Brooklyn. Provincetown. Provincetown.

You know, honestly, Brooklyn will be cute because it's right here. Provincetown will be amazing because it's so beautiful in the summer and the community. I think it'll be huge for the gays to host. Really, because then the gays will be hosting the Olympics and that would be fun. That would be so fun. A gay host? I love it. Yeah. But listen, to bring it back to Paris. You know, those swimmers were swimming. Did you catch any of the Olympic swimming trials? I...

And being told of the moments. Yeah. And did you? So basically, like, I just want to say one thing. Katie Ledecky, she really is no joke. Her reputation precedes her, but then you watch her and you understand why reputation, capital R in this case, is so important.

is why that reputation is what it is. Did you see the video of Katie Ledecky swimming in the water with a glass of chocolate milk on her head and it doesn't fall off? Now that is just a flex, what we call a flex in the industry. That's what we call ego. Listen, Katie. That is what we call diva behavior. Truly, honestly, as a lover of chocolate milk, do you love chocolate milk? Haven't had it in decades.

So you're not even really, it's not even on the brain for you. I would gladly accept a glass of it right now. I just, it's not what I go for. It's not what's available. Like, let's talk about dairy for a second. I would love to. I was just talking about this with a friend. Imagine you're out to dinner in a nice restaurant. And let's say an Olympian you're on a date with is like, I'll have a glass of milk. Yeah. I would be turned on personally. The boldness that that has.

The consciousness of osteoporosis that that has, I have to say, there was a time in American culture where osteoporosis was one of the top three things we were worried about.

And now that fear is just gone. There was a time when they used to say, you have to have to drink two full glasses of milk a day to get the calcium that you need or you run the risk of osteoporosis, which, by the way, my grandmother described as, and I quote, not a day in the park.

And she said osteoporosis was not a day in the park. And now, all of a sudden, we're not even thinking about it. They're saying, f*** milk. They're saying, milk couldn't even get arrested. Milk, you're not cracking the top 20 issues that Americans care about. Because with inflation, honey... Honey, inflation, number one is inflation. Number two, international affairs. Number three...

Chapel Roan. Number four. Culture Wars.

Number five. When is Severance coming back? And then maybe number six, osteoporosis. So maybe it's certainly top ten. It's not top five. But that is something that we could all rally behind. Osteoporosis was like the thing. There were no party lines with osteoporosis. Because everyone has bones. Everyone has bones. And so this is something that we could really get together. Now...

This is all to lead us into a discussion about... We've got to bring it back to Paris. We've got to bring it back to Paris. Well, today we're talking about the top Olympic moments. And there are a lot of them. I would say the unit of measurement in the Olympics is moments. It's not events. It's not even the people. It's not the medals. It is the moments.

You remember the moments most of all. By the way, I'm looking at these moments and I'm so happy to see a couple of moments here that I was actually watching live in the flesh. Oh, the Katie Ledecky moment. Absolutely. All the swimming trials. We have an engagement to talk about. We have a 16-year-old track and field record break.

that just happened very recently. This is all leading up to Paris. Needless to say, this is shaping up to be an exciting Olympics before it's even begun. Oui, oui, Beau, which of course means in French, I so agree with you. Yes.

And I think that, first of all, I do want to say Ledecky, that is, it's kind of like, of course it's going to be exciting to watch her win. But when someone is so much better than everyone else, you kind of do lose a little bit of the suspense. Like we're just going to be watching this woman dominate and that's earned. But, you know, you wish for a little bit more suspense here. There's suspense yet to be found.

You will find it if you are seeking it out. And I am. Let Katie be the Beyonce. I would say Katie Ledecky is the Beyonce of the Olympics this year. Wow, that's a huge title. To be given the title of the Beyonce of the Olympics, now she's got to come on the podcast. Katie.

Open invite. Katie, we do very well with people with your first name. That's all I'm going to say. We do very well with you and your type and your ilk. And your ilk. Now, let's just quickly talk about the top moments that are not going to be considering the totality of the Olympics of record. But let's just say in these trial moments, first, I want to talk about

These record breaks, okay? So 20,000 people witnessed the first of the nine-day trials in Indianapolis. Record attendance for an endorsement meet, which did not last long because Wednesday's event drew an even larger turnout. USA Swimming announced a new attendance record of 22,209. And that wasn't the only record broken on Wednesday. Matt Fallon captured the American record by finishing the 200-meter breaststroke in, get this, two minutes and...

6.54 seconds. These timers are precise. Let me tell you something they need to be. Because if anything was extremely clear in the trials, it's that this comes down to literal milliseconds. I was watching like a few of the heats and you know, you don't qualify if you're like 0.3 away from where the front runner was. It is heartbreaking to watch it come down to that much.

tiny, tiny, tiny difference, which you have to think they're prepared for. But it is crushing to watch someone just lose by .08 and not even lose, but come in sixth or something, because that's how close it was between the top six. It's wild. Not even lose, just not qualify for the next team. That is...

I can barely conceptualize time in my everyday life where I'm thinking in terms of minutes and hours, maybe. Like for a tenth or a hundredth of a second to determine my career, that is wild.

And we applaud all of you. We applaud you all. And honestly, like, let's just hope that these timers are worth their salt. Because sometimes I'm looking in the ocean. And by the ocean, I mean the pool where they swim, the pool. Sometimes I'm looking in that ocean and I see them all hit the wall at one time. And I'm like, I'm sorry, but who can say who can say who was first? Like, I guess we they got those special cameras. They got those special clocks.

It's up to them, but really very stressful. You don't want to mess up. I agree. We're putting a lot of faith in technology. And typical. Timer technology, camera technology. Matt Fallon, well done, sister. 21-year-old...

Legend who narrowly surpassed Josh Perino's time from 2016 to qualify for Paris, alongside 17-year-old Thomas Heilman, who becomes the youngest U.S. male Olympic swimmer since Michael Phelps' debut at age 15 in 2000. These are the future stars. Current stars. Yeah, current stars. I mean, current events are happening as we speak.

Imagine your thing being the breaststroke. Like you're so good at the breaststroke. Like it is unreal how good you are at the breaststroke because you think like, oh, you want to become a swimmer. Like you're doing freestyle. Like backstroke, breaststroke, these are really leisurely activities you do to get to and fro in the water. But in this Olympic arena, you can be a breaststroke speedster, a backstroke.

stroke raptor oh my god okay you better be a backstroke raptor if you're gonna qualify if 22 000 people have their eyes if you have 44 000 eyes on you 22 000 that's crazy i doubled it because of eyes i'm being ableist and assuming everyone has two eyes and they might not i'm so sorry well speaking of two it takes two people to get engaged listen to this headline

Lily King got engaged after qualifying for her second event. Five-time Olympic medalist Lily King collected two new pieces of jewelry Thursday night at the U.S. Olympic swimming trials. Moments after finishing in second place behind Kate Douglas in the 200-meter breaststroke at Lucas Oil Stadium to qualify for her second event of the 2024 Paris Olympics, Kate

King's boyfriend, James Wells, proposed to her as she made her way out of the pool into the warm-down area. Video of the moment was shared soon after on social media by USA Swimming and NBC Sports. I don't know if I would be particularly open to this moment while I'm dehydrated, sweating, stressed. My eyes are... My head is spinning, and then my man gets on one knee. I guess you're at your most vulnerable and open. Well, I mean...

Couldn't you have at least gotten her a blowout station before the big moment? Give this woman a damn blowout before she puts a ring on her finger. Yeah, let her get her blowout. Let her go put her shoulder pads on. Let her play on her spontaneity. That's the thing about surprise engagements is like you kind of have to tip it to the lady a little bit so they can feel like, you know, they're on top of themselves for their own moment. You know what I mean? What's it called? A very millennial thing.

when a whole bunch of people start to dance in unison. Oh, that of course is a flash mob. Flash mob. Yeah. Is this the new flash mob moment? US qualifying trials. That's why there are so many. 22,000. 22,000. That is a flash mob. Mama gets out of the water. Lily King gets out of the water. Oh, somebody loves you. I was going to have love.

Everyone in the theater doing like Left Shark, right? Shark, like just kind of giving that mid choreo that they always give during a flash mob. And literally just think about James Wells, King's boyfriend, just sort of doing a little dance as he walks up to her. Cut to Lilly King, who's just out of the water. Like, oh my f***ing God. Oh my f***ing God, baby. Baby, no. Oh my f***ing God. Baby, no. Baby, no.

And she's freaking out. And then he gets on one knee. And like, I guess you'd have to get married. Then once someone organizes a flash mob, which we're not saying that James Wells did. In fact, he did not. But in this moment, it's like he attempted grandeur. And, you know, she's got to say yes. She's got to say. Although I'm looking at pictures of the moment. It's very sweet. I'm smiling. She seems happy. He seems happy. He's a burly fellow. Is he? These are people who could... Both of them could...

literally move a mountain. These are like actual Olympians in the sense that they can control the elements. They have this strength. I've Googled. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This she looks very thrilled. This is sweet.

So you have to imagine if you're going to propose to your girlfriend at the Olympics, when everyone is watching, you probably know about her, that she's the type of girl that would want that. Definitely. This, this is just her job. This is the thing. Like we can't really put too much gravitas or stakes in these moments. Like,

For them, it's just like, oh, yeah, like another day at the office. Another day absolutely slaying it at the office, qualifying for my second event and getting a ring on my finger, as Jennifer Lawrence in American Hustle said.

I got a ring on my finger. And an Oscar-nominated performance. We stan. And then another moment, a 16-year-old stunner at track and field trials in Eugene, Oregon. We have a sprinting phenomenon and intersectional, a straight-A student

Give it up for Quincy Wilson, who had already become a true future star of American track and field with bullets emblazoned across the front of his uniform. Wilson ran 400 meters in 44.6 seconds, shattering the under-18 world record and breaking an American record. I can stop carrying this heavy burden. Period.

So this is how far we've made it when I mentioned until I mentioned my mile time, which was four minutes and 36 seconds. Wow. And I just wanted to bring up my 400 times. So he ran a 44.66 seconds. I did a 54 in high school and was busting my ass. Couldn't have even dreamed of going faster. So 10 seconds faster than that. And were you a straight A student? No.

Um, actually Bowen, yes, I actually was a straight A student until I stopped caring at math. And I took like a very, very, very easy course, like a Regents course, we called it. I took statistics and I got an A in that, but probably wasn't an A student in math in the way that you would qualify as like a typical, very good student. But I just didn't try. You don't know me. You don't know what I qualify. Statistics is famously very hard.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I guess it depends. But it was pretty easy stuff. But, you know, I'm not calling myself any Quincy Wilson. I'm just saying, you know, this is about Quincy. He's done an amazing work. I mean, I'm starting to get jealous of Quincy Wilson because here's this other little morsel. They...

They, as a new balance, let him design his own racing singlet. Damn. With the Maryland state flag pattern. This is a true... That's the dream. That's the dream. Oh, and this is a good design. He did, like, the pixel camo, black and white, with a pop of yellow. This boy knows color theory. This boy is a legend. Oh, wow. Yeah. He looks great. Wow. These kids are so young. These are young kids, and we...

their achievements. Go off. My gosh. Go off, kids. I believe the children are our future. I believe the... And now we have to change the melody so we don't get sued. Children are our future. Yes. You wanted to say Whitney Houston in a preacher's way. Only love to Whitney. Only love to Whitney. Let's take a quick break and when we come back, we are going to go through the top Olympic moments throughout history. And time.

We are back. We're about to go through some of the top moments across all Olympics history. And then, of course, we're going to award our gold, silver and bronze medal. How about this, Bo? We all remember what we were if we were someone that was cognizant in 1992. It couldn't be us. We were only two years old. Children. When Derek Redmond was at the 1992 Barcelona Olympics and he competed in the 400 meters.

A hamstring injury forced him to pull up during his semifinal heat. Redmond decided to limp on to finish the race before his dad, Jim, ran onto the track to help his son continue and put his arm around his son's waist. Crowd gave a standing ovation, and just before the finish line, Jim let go so Derek, who was in tears, could finish on his own. Sometimes daddy help. My daddy said...

shoot, I'm coming down to the track and helping you cross the finish line. Like a father do. I love my father. I just got to meet him for the second time. Oh, I'm so glad.

I felt as though this is a man who would hop onto the track and help his son cross the finish line. He absolutely would. Like if you were ever doing an SNL sketch and you got the yips, I just know that Rulan would jump down from the stand and he would finish the sketch. Well, honey, I've had the yips at SNL for years and he hasn't shown up once. That's not true. You're not categorizing this in a correct way. You never have the yips. You only ever deliver it. Girl, you don't know.

Speaking of daddy, this number two. We have Michael Phelps, eight gold medals in the 08 Beijing Olympics. That was a moment. A total moment. I mean, and he hosted... Speaking of SNL, he hosted the premiere after this happened. Remember that? Yeah, I'm sure Lorne was like, well, he has to get to eight. Otherwise, he's not hosting. Otherwise, it's not interesting. No one knows who he is. It's not interesting. He...

See, he had a quest for eight medals. It was nearly derailed in his second race, the four-by-one relay. Phelps' teammate and anchor swimmer on the U.S. relay, Jason Lezak, entered the water more than half a second behind the French team, but he managed to finish ahead by eight hundredths of a second with the fastest ever.

relay leg. Thank you, Jason. Thanks, Jason. And then the seventh event final, the 100 meter butterfly Phelps hung on to win by an even closer margin, just one hundredth of a second. Okay. Like this is what I'm saying. It's crazy for

For the lag to be half a second behind the French team to be, like, devastating is devastating to think about. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. But, Michael, you legend, you have...

You have earned your name in the annals of history. The annals. Olympics history, which is best represented on this podcast, Two Guys, Five Rings, one of the best pieces of Olympics content ever created. Get this. Two guys, five rings, one ankle.

Oh. During a vault. I know you're talking about Carrie Strug. Carrie's, this is number three, moment number three. In her first of two vaults, Strug sat down on the landing and injured her ankle.

Very, very hard to watch. She was unsure she could vault a second time, but decided to attempt it as she thought her second vault was needed to ensure that the U.S. would get the gold. After limping back to the end of the runway, she took the vault, landed briefly on both feet before instantly hopping onto the uninjured foot. She then collapsed to her knees and needed help off the competition floor. Eventually, her coach, Bella Caroli,

carried Strug onto the medal podium to join her teammates, the rest of the Magnificent Seven. Now, this is an interesting one because, yes, we love that Carrie was able to, you know, fight through it to get the gold, but also, you know, Mama's foot could have snapped off. At a certain point, it's like, but what about her foot? What about her foot? I mean, do you think Bella, Mr. Bella, like...

got what was going on. Like, I don't know. Bella is of course an icon. I mean, who could forget the mustache and the magnificent seven. He actually, he kind of is a prototype. He's kind of like a daddy prototype, like Bella Caroli. Like you see a lot of guys walking around Brooklyn trying to serve that.

You know, I always say Bowen Yang, very powerful with a mustache. Wish I could grow one. IRL. I see you trying right now. I see you. That's for my character in a film. I know. Bowen is shooting a film. His character has a little bit of facial hair. It's a little grungy. Because isn't this your most adult role yet? Absolutely.

This is your most, they're saying this is a huge, this is a huge career transition. He's finally doing a grown up adult role. Like this is your, this is your transition. This is your Miley Cyrus last song. Yes. Oh my God. Last song. Was that the movie that really got her into adulthood?

I would say most famous example of a transition to adulthood. Oh my God. People are really going to be listening to this. Like when will they talk about the Olympics? Like when you can't deny, we have been talking about it, but certainly it's not, but we, we, in essence, we haven't talked about the Olympics. I wouldn't change a thing. No. Um, just like, you know who else bet wouldn't change a thing.

Abby D'Agostino and Nikki Hamblin. Oh, this was an international moment of peace and cooperation and friendship. Talk about it. Well, as we all remember in Rio 2016, I mean, forget the Tongan guy, which we'll get to, our king. This was... Let me set the scene. Go ahead. Nikki Hamblin from New Zealand stumbled and fell in the trap. D'Agostino, who was right behind Hamblin, tripped over her. Instead of continuing...

Queen Abby stopped to make sure Nikki could get up. Both athletes resumed the race, but D'Agostino soon realized she was injured and fell to the ground too. You can't write this. This time, Hamlin is the one who stops to check on D'Agostino. They both managed to cross the finish line. Hamlin more than 90 seconds behind the winner of the heat and D'Agostino more than two minutes back. But...

This was something that made you say, this is the human spirit. This is part of the human condition for all the pain and suffering that defines life as a human being on this planet, in an inhospitable world. There are moments of gorgeous friendship and care and mutual aid. And this is what the Olympics are all about. I could cry.

I am crying. You are. You know what this makes me think of? Go! So confusing sometimes! Like, they were the original CharlieXCX and Lorde. Like, when they stopped and they said, they worked it out on the remix. Like, they worked it out on the track. Let's work it out on the remix. They truly did. Like,

Let's work it out on the remix. But they basically like, if you don't know what we're talking about, listen to Girls So Confusing version with Lorde from Charli XCX and then go back and watch this. It's literally New Zealand. Yeah. New Zealand. It literally is. And let's pretend Charli's from the USA. Let's just pretend. This moment was giving you, I'm glad I know how you feel because I ride for you, Charli.

this literally someone needs someone that listens to this podcast needs to take a clip from Abby D'Agostino and Nikki Hamblin and put it to Girl So Confusing remix of Thor you have to please do it for us that can't because we don't know how to do that they say we have the same hair we're just two gay men living in this world and our next moment is one gay man being diving off a board

I think, to me, Greg Louganis is, like, one of the most compelling, interesting, like...

I'm just going to say, this is my contender for gold medal. I'm just going to come out there and say it. Can I say something? I agree with you two. And let's just reveal, Greg Louganis wins the gold medal for this episode. We are standing. We are gay men supporting gay men. Okay? And this is a moment, the Greg Louganis moment off the diving board is a moment that could have enveloped society in gay shame. And yet we are here to tell you

36 years later that we are more prideful than ever. Matt, I want you to tell the people about the story of Greg Louganis. It was the 1988 Seoul Olympics, okay? In the preliminary round of men's springboard diving, Greg Louganis struck his head on the springboard during his ninth dive. He collapsed into the water, earning a score of 6.30 points. That cluster.

Before the final dive, he received several stitches from a US team doctor and easily qualified for the final, which he won comfortably. Seven years later, Louganis not only publicly came out as gay, but also revealed that he was HIV positive and had been at the time of the Seoul Olympics. Louganis admitted he worried that his head injury had possibly contaminated the water and risked infecting other divers, and also struggled over whether he should have told the team doctor about his HIV positive status.

Mario Lopez played Louganis in a memorable made-for-TV movie adaptation breaking the surface. This was the definition of overcoming. I...

I literally was about to say, there needs to be a movie made about this. And you know what? When I looked at the document, I thought, wow, Greg Louganis looks a lot like Mario Lopez. And then I realized in the document, our producers had been kind enough to put the poster for Breaking the Surface, the Greg Louganis story in the document, and it is Mario Lopez. So actually, we'll never be able to know how much they look alike. We'll never be able to know. Can I reveal something about my personal history? You may, always. In the early days...

As in the early days of the internet and the early days of my life, in the time that I was grappling with the fact that I was maybe attracted to the male sex. M-E-N. Yep, M-E-N. M-E-N. One of the Googles that would come up would be Mario Lopez shirtless.

Mario Lopez shirtless all the time. But I also have to tell you something. I'm looking at Greg Louganis. This man was no slouch. Greg is forever a hunk. But Mario Lopez and what would come up, thanks to J-Lo, after she wore the Versace dress, which led to Google Embersurge being a thing, was I had a trope of Mario Lopez as Greg Louganis pictures of him in a little Speedo and me going, that'll do, pig. That really will do, pig.

And you know what I mean? Like, in many ways, Bo, because Greg Louganis dove...

Mario Lopez was able to pretend to dive or act diving so that you could grow up, be gay, make gay friends, me being one of them, we could make our gay podcast, and it would lead to us having this gay podcast about sports. And I honestly feel like for this episode to end with us commemorating Greg Louganis and being able to say thank you and giving him a gold medal arbitrarily because that's how we feel today as hosts of this podcast, Two Guys, Five Rings,

Life is so beautiful. I'm still crying. I'm still crying. This is why Greg Louganis wins the gold medal. I just want to quickly talk about some other moments. Go ahead. A lot of moments. I mean, it's the Olympics after all. It's made of moments. Of course, we have Michael Johnson at the 96 Atlanta Olympics. We have the Tongan King at the opening ceremony for Rio. Pita Tafetofua.

Truly, like, everyone thirsting. One of, like, the pure moments of, like, global unity where everyone thought... Global thirst. Yeah. Global thirst where everyone's like, that is one of the most wonderful men to ever exist. Usain Bolt, at several Olympics at this point, just dominating in the field.

Atlanta women's soccer for the American team and women's basketball for both the Atlanta games and Tokyo in 2020. And don't forget the fierce five. But you know, Carrie Strug is folded into that a little bit. She was a part of the magnificent seven, but I love when the gymnasts like to name their group. It reminds me of like when a group of high school girls would have a name for their group of friends. Did you have them at your school? We didn't really have them at my school. One group of girls at my high school named themselves the stilettos.

Stilette. And then instead of stilettos, they were stilette hoes. I understand. Very millennial, like, we want to grow up to be sluts ideology without really understanding what that is. But, like, also...

not having a full grasp on the wordplay. Stiletto's doesn't really roll off. And then there was another... So that was... I remember when I was in 11th grade, the 10th graders were named the Stiletto's, the cool girls in 10th grade were named Stiletto's, and the 9th grade girls, who everyone in my grade would be like, oh, this generation coming up under us is such sluts. They were called le-s***. L-E-s***. Like, we are le-s***. Yeah.

I kind of like that. I know. They were the coolest people there. It's kind of punk. It's kind of punk rock. It's so punk rock. So Greg Louganis gets the gold medal. Congrats, Greg. Who earns the silver medal for all of these all-time Olympic stories, Beau? Carrie Strug makes me sad. Like, I want to give it to Carrie. Give it to her.

No, because honestly, if I think about Abby D'Agostino, Nikki Hamblin, I could cry almost as much as I do. It's so confusing sometimes. I'm so happy we made that connection because it's so real. It's so real. Or, you know, if it were 2016, and if Joanne by Lady Gaga had just come out, we would be telling people, you need to put, Hey, girl! We don't need to keep one another!

I personally, and you can outvote me, outweigh me, I want to give silver to Abby D'Agostino and Nikki Hamlet. I think it's a really good choice. And then can I pick the bronze? Yes.

Yes. Carrie, because I don't want her to have gone through all that pain for nothing. We need to give her the bronze. Because what would be worse than us just being like, oh, we're concerned for her. So we're just going to completely overlook her achievement. Like, come on. We have to give her something. Take the bronze of your all time Olympic moments, Carrie. So bronze medal to Carrie Strug. Silver medal to the girl so confusing, Lillian.

moment and the gold medal goes to Greg Louganis and it goes to Greg Louganis every day and we choose you Greg and you look hot in these pictures of these throwback photos I'm taking maybe even hotter than Mario Lopez who played you

Just saying a lot. Them spitting words. This has been another epic installment of the Two Guys, Five Rings podcast, which is now in the cultural lexicon. Yes. This is our analysis at the top moment. Somehow we made them very, very, very gay. But that's what the Olympics are. Listen, in the original Olympics, these men were naked and oiled up and throwing the discus. There's nothing gayer than that. Honey, let...

let's just say back in ancient Greece, they didn't discriminate. All right. More on that later in this podcast. I'm sure. I'm sure. Watch every moment of the 2024 Paris Olympics beginning July 26th on NBC and Peacock. And for the first time, you can stream the 2024 Paris games on the iHeartRadio app. And that's our episode. And we will serenade you out with the tunes.

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