Donald Trump, Time Bandit
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If you've ever felt like the auto repair business is broken, you're not alone. Everybody's over it. From talking down to selling up to car-splaining mechanics, you're just done putting up with BS. Bad service. Stop!

At Midas, we're on a mission to redefine car care, where, get this, we talk to you like a real person, helping you plan for today and down the road. Imagine that. We're driving forward with this in mind. Reroute to Midas, where we're putting an end to BS. Hello, Los Angeles. Welcome to Love It or Leave It. Tonight on the show, Vice President Kamala Harris is here, and she has a friend. Damon Lindelof isn't here, but Twist, he is.

Then at the end, we cool off with some hot takes. But first, let's get into it. What a week! In dueling speeches this week, Kamala Harris and Donald Trump laid out their economic plans. Vice President Kamala Harris laid out her program in Pennsylvania on Wednesday, including a tax credit for first-time homebuyers, tax cuts for families, and a plan to launch 25 million small businesses. Meanwhile, Donald Trump held up a picture of what appeared to be a giant mousetrap baited with a stuffed cat under a giant sign that read, Free Immigrant Dinner Yum Yum.

That's a terrible plan. Harris emphasized that Trump's loyalties lie with billionaires, not workers. You see, for Donald Trump, our economy works best if it works for those who own the big skyscrapers, not those who actually build them, not those who wire them, not those who mop the floors.

But what about those sitting in the big skyscrapers eating sweet green salads at their desk and agonizing over how many exclamation points to use in an email? Who will speak for them? Meanwhile, over in Georgia, Trump offered this riposte. It's this. It's not muscle. It's all right there. That's a muscle too, they say. They don't say that.

The brain is not a muscle. The heart's a muscle, my dude. Also, a metaphor for compassion and zeal. Sometimes we use strengthening a muscle as an analogy for how we can improve our memory, for example. Anyway, the race is tied, which makes me want to blow my brain muscle out. Also, whenever Trump says, they say, or they tell me, it's fun to imagine he's not making up some unspoken chorus of voices, but it's in fact relaying the conversations he has had with his non-binary, insanely supportive best friend. LAUGHTER

Now that I've said it, you'll hear it that way forever. They tell me I'm number one. What a friend. Here is Trump again threatening to go stand around a McDonald's because Kamala once worked at a McDonald's. I'm going to a McDonald's over the next two weeks and I'm going to stand over the French fries because I want to see what her job really wasn't like. He almost landed that. He almost landed that. That was, all right, let's find this person.

For those listening at home, we're getting hit with this silver alert. Is anyone here in trouble? Or does anyone not know where they are? I mean, I guess it's important we find the person, but also important, show business. During an interview with MSNBC's Stephanie Rule, in which she talked about her economic agenda, Harris confirmed that yes, despite what Donald Trump may say, she did work at McDonald's. Part of the reason I even talk about having worked at McDonald's is because...

There are people who work at McDonald's in our country who are trying to raise a family. I worked there as a student. I was a kid. I do hope we keep having this debate. When did Connell Harris work at McDonald's? God damn it with the silver alert. It's unbelievable. Let's see. Let's see who it is. I mean, it's a serious thing. They did? The alert is to let us know to stop looking? Hey, everybody, good news. They found her. Dead. No, I'm kidding. I'm just...

All right. I do hope we keep having this debate. When did Kamala Harris work at McDonald's? How much more relatable is she than Donald Trump? I mean, look at Kamala Harris talking about caregiving. I remember being there for my mother when she was diagnosed with cancer, cooking meals for her, taking her to her appointments, just trying to make her comfortable, figuring out which clothes were soft enough that they wouldn't irritate her.

Trump responded, Right.

But this sideshow about McDonald's was just one of many ways in which Trump grabbed headlines this week. Here he is launching a line of watches. I think you're going to love it. My new Trump watches. We're doing quite a number with watches. It's a turbulent watch with almost 200 grams of gold and more than 100 real diamonds. That's a lot of diamonds. I love gold. I love diamonds. We all do.

Only 147 of these extraordinary watches will ever exist in the world, and owning one puts you in a very exclusive club. Get your Trump watch right now. Go to GetTrumpWatches.com. It's Trump time. With just weeks to go, Trump is announcing the sale of made-to-order watches, each costing $100,000. Yes, they're $100,000. The perfect gift for the Supreme Court justice who has everything.

You check your Trump watch. Oh no, I'm late for the board meeting where we decide which bird should go extinct next. I will say it's hard to knock. It's Trump time though. That's a home run, unfortunately. Also, it's like, but there were many more moments this week where Trump's inanity and rantings grabbed the headlines. Here's what he said about Russia. As somebody told me the other day, they beat Hitler. They beat Napoleon. That's what they do. He said Ukraine no longer exists. Ukraine is...

Yeah, and it's not Ukraine anymore. He expounded on a conspiracy theory about immigrants. They're actually going in with massive machine gun type equipment. They're going in with guns that are beyond even military scope. And they're taking over apartment buildings. They're taking over. And then there was this. Nancy Pelosi should be prosecuted for that. And she should also be prosecuted

For J6. Trump also invented a new and weird way to creep out women at a rally in Indiana. Because I am your protector. I want to be your protector. You will no longer be abandoned, lonely or scared. You will no longer be in danger. You're not going to be in danger. You will no longer be thinking about abortion. Hey, this guy bothering you says this guy bothering you.

Won't be lonely or scared or thinking about abortion. That's not what Donald Trump offers women. That's what a strong, cold martini in the bathtub offers women. He also encouraged women to please show him the baby. We want beautiful babies in our country. We want you to have your beautiful, beautiful, perfect baby. We want those babies and we need them. Hey, question. Have you ever seen Trump and Rumpelstiltskin in the same place at the same time? No.

But back to Georgia and Trump's ideas. That speech in Savannah actually was an attempt to lay out his economic agenda. It was supposed to be serious. And in between his ramblings, it actually kind of was. Trump proposed fewer environmental regulations and special manufacturing zones on federal land with ultra-low taxes and regulations for American producers. And for American tap water drinkers, exciting new flavors.

Trump also reiterated his call for lowering the corporate tax rate from 21 to 15%. But even some Republicans seemed open to compromise. Between 15 and 21, that's the sweet spot, said Matt Gaetz. But on top of the old school Republican... That was like a Michelin two star. It was a detour. But worth it.

But on top of the old school Republican tax cuts and deregulations, he, of course, layered on tariffs and mass deportations. Your wages will rise. Your costs will fall. Your job opportunities will grow because we will conduct the largest deportation operation, sadly, in American history. Who's that sadly for? It's not for them and it's not for us. An easy cut, I think.

You're not sad. No one in that room is sad. Well, you are all sad. You just don't know how to fix it. You've tried suppressing it. You've tried buying a Cybertruck. You've tried calling the HOA about your neighbor's pride flag. Nothing's working. So tax cuts for the rich, tariffs or a giant sales tax for everyone else versus...

Tax cuts for the middle class, loans for small businesses, affordable housing, caps on prescription drug prices. This is a debate we can win. I know we always think Trump is Trump's worst enemy, but the American people know that he is an untrustworthy maniac. There are just a lot of voters who think the economy was better under his administration. So Trump's policies are somehow also Trump's worst enemy. According to the Washington Post, Trump is only six points ahead of Kamala on the economy compared to 12 he had over President Biden earlier this year.

Our goal is to fight to a draw over a question in which our argument is realistic, specific, progressive, and genuine versus a deranged charlatan whose policies would make life worse for all but like 200 freaks. And battle to a draw we shall, like playing a sensitive child in a game he made up or the Korean War.

Meanwhile, Tim Walls will attend the University of Michigan versus University of Minnesota football game in Ann Arbor on Saturday and speak to students about the importance of registering to vote. This is where Tim Walls truly shines. When he's in coach mode, Tim Walls makes Ted Lasso look like Ted Hitler.

Speaking of Democrats making us proud, New York City Mayor Eric Adams was indicted on federal charges late on Wednesday, becoming the city's first mayor to face federal charges while in office. Soon, the rat czar said to her subterranean rodent army as the Q train thundered above. Very soon, my darlings, and all in good time.

The indictment was unsealed on Thursday, and what do you know? Adams faces five federal charges of bribery, fraud, and soliciting illegal foreign campaign donations for all that stuff that seemed, at the time, like bribery, fraud, and soliciting illegal foreign campaign donations. In one text exchange cited in the indictment, an Adams staffer who was arranging another paid-for trip to Turkey texted Adams, to be on the safe side, please delete all messages you send me. Adams replied, always do.

But do you? In another 10 out of 10 text message to see in an indictment, an Adam staffer asked a Turkish airline manager where else Adams could stay in Turkey. The airline manager answered, four seasons, to which the staffer replied, it's too expensive. The airline manager wrote back, why does he care? He's not going to pay. His name will not be on anything either. The staffer replied, super. Super.

Anyway, that's how Adams wound up sleeping at a small Turkish business called Four Seasons Total Landscaping. What a choice it is to do all of this in writing, to type it all out on a phone. In other news, The Guardian published an article alleging that Heritage President Kevin Roberts, one of the architects of Project 2025, told his work colleagues he killed a pit bull with a shovel in 2004. Though to be fair, I'd also be afraid if I saw a pit bull with a shovel.

The Pitbull's owners confirmed one of their dogs did go missing in 2004, but had no evidence that Roberts was responsible, except for that Pitbull skin rug in his billiard room, but that could have come from anywhere.

The evidence, it sure seems like Roberts told multiple colleagues he beat a dog to death in 2004. Kenneth Hammond, the history chair at New Mexico University at the time, told The Guardian, "...my recollection of his account was that he was discussing in the hallways with various members of the faculty, including me, that a neighbor's dog had been barking pretty relentlessly and was, you know, keeping the baby and probably the parents awake, and that he kind of lost it and took a shovel and killed the dog. End of problem." I feel like there still might be a problem.

Another colleague and her spouse recall Roberts telling the same story at a dinner party. Roberts seemed to sincerely believe this was a solid anecdote. Need more proof? When Roberts was on Jeopardy, Alex Trebek opened the Get to Know the Contestant segment by saying, Kevin, it says here you did some shoveling recently. Three other professors say they heard the story around the same time from their shock co-workers who heard it firsthand. Imagine having this kind of office gossip in your possession. You'd be there at 6 a.m. just vibrating in a conference room waiting for anyone to arrive.

wrote the outlet in a statement to the Guardian, Roberts denied ever killing a dog with a shovel. The statement continued, it was actually more of a trowel. Roberts denies it. He says it's a patently untrue and baseless story backed by zero evidence. But then why do these people from separate gatherings remember you telling them a very specific story about killing a dog with a shovel? That dog don't hunt because you killed it with a shovel. Oh.

And finally, speaking of colleagues revealing terrible secrets, an FAA probe into Boeing found that factory workers felt pressured to prioritize fast production over high quality work. Not pressured, the cabins of Boeing airplanes after the doors blew off. All right, when we come back, Vice President Kamala Harris is here and she's frankly exhausted. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up.

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Sucks.

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Shout out to Eartha Kitt. It's time to shift into another gear. It's time to get pumped up. It's time to leave it all on the fucking field. But I've already given you all the pep talks I have. Here tonight to blow the roof off the place, it's Vice President Kamala Harris. Oh, God, that's right, John. All right, who's ready to get high? You okay, Madam Vice President? You seem a little tired.

Well, tired. Why would I be tired? I haven't slept for the last two months. Why would I, of all people, be tired? Needing sleep is a weakness, John. And winners can't have weaknesses. I've never felt better. Never more alert.

I can see every detail on every bird in this room. There are no birds in this room. There are no birds here. I'm actually too alert, in fact. Okay? My brain is processing everything too fast and too accurately. And I'm just, you know, I'm going to close my eyes for one quick second on account of how awake I am. And I'm just going to...

Close them. Right now you're on stage in front of a... Okay, she's asleep. What was that sound? Oh, right now? Yeah. It's almost like we're in your dream. Yeah, what are you doing in my dream? What are you doing here, John? It can't be your dream. It's my show. Oh, no, it's definitely my dream. I mean, look, Teddy Roosevelt is here. Wait a second.

Yes. Kamala, my coconut pearl, you're looking radiant as always. You know, usually when he shows up, it's for a sex dream. We call ourselves Rough Riders. Okay, I hate that. I hate that.

But, you know, I guess we're going to have to do something else since you're here, John. Honestly, thank God. And I appreciate that. But what does it mean that I still experience myself as a conscious agent in someone else's dream? Is the whole universe just a product of a dreaming higher intelligence? And when that mind wakes up, we'll cease to exist? Who brought the dyspeptic Jew? Fuck. Honestly, who knows? Teddy, since we can't, you know, go at it how we want to.

Could I ask you for some advice? I'll tell you what I told my son Kermit when I handed him his first gun at age three. Shoot! Okay. All right, all right. Well, I'm here, so maybe we can both just ask Teddy Roosevelt some questions. Sure. We don't normally get access to Teddy Roosevelt. I mean, I get access to him. Okay.

Teddy. All right, all right. Come sit down, Teddy Roosevelt. Well, I think I might. I might take a quick break here. Yes. Teddy, you know, you were vice president who went on to become president. Indeed, what a tragedy befell President McKinley. Yeah. Right. Is targeting suburban moderates in North Carolina, is that the secret? I was indeed the first Republican candidate for president to crack the borders of the old Confederacy.

This is something that I'm very proud of. The first Republican to carry the state of North Carolina. Well, that's an interesting fact. In answer to your question, these United States must be targeted one by one. North Carolina, South Carolina, East Carolina, and West Carolina should be admitted to the union, as I wish it would be.

God, he's so dumb. It's hot. Yeah, it is. He is hot. He's so hot. I want it. Hey, President Roosevelt, it says in your Wikipedia, you don't know what that is. It's not important. Zoology, you're interested? I will have you know I own all 60 volumes of Wikipedia, and I purchased them from a salesman who came door to door. Oh.

Neat. Your interest in zoology began age seven when you saw a dead seal at a market. After attaining the seal's head, you and your cousin formed the Roosevelt Museum of Natural History. It's pretty RFK Jr. quoted, wouldn't you say? Indeed, I was roused from my slumber in Hades.

Because I heard that there was a credible third-party candidate running under the bull moose mantle for the presidency of the United States. And I said, bully, it's time for me to go lend him my support. But that he eats bears. And when I arrived, it turned out he'd already dropped out. So here we are. You keep slapping your knee like that. I'm going to send John out the room.

Wow. That's Kamala's kink. Oh, my huckleberry. My chickadee. My field hen will have our races yet. So I'm just trying to understand the...

You're so crazy, Teddy. So there's a bit of a delay to get the news down in Hades. So I don't know, it's not an internet thing. So you get a paper of some kind. So by the time you got here, what is the traveling that you did to get here? I followed the path of Orpheus, you see. Oh, Orpheus. Yes. Orpheus. Atchison, Topeka, and Santa Fe Railroad. I had to go, I had to take it across the River Styx even. Luckily, we had built a canal through Panama and it expedited the journey somewhat. See, I thought he was talking about the Matrix.

Yeah, in a way he is also talking about the Matrix. Yeah. Do you think America is ready for their first woman president? Well, when I look out at this manful country of ours and I look every man in the eye, man upon man upon man.

Our destiny, as men of destiny, and this is all basically ripped from the walls of the Natural History Museum in New York, that mankind shall man forward, man by man by man, until man is victorious over anything less than man. That was beautiful. What the fuck? What did you eat? What is that? Well, if there's one thing that I look down on, it is a bully.

I hate bullies, too. And I've recommended to every young boy that I came across, if you find a bully, you should confront him. And if that means voting for the first woman to be president of these United States, then I say it's my time to have it happen 124 years after I did it first time. John, go away. Wow. Yeah, it's turning on. Your question, yes, yes, you sniveling man.

All right, taking that feedback. Your daughter had a snake named Emily Spinach. Yes. What a fine thing for a daughter. But it seems like you had strong-willed daughters. Of course she was very strong. We were all strong. We were Roosevelt's. Right. What do you think of your... The word Roosevelt is synonymous with strength. What do you think of your grand... And masculinity, even if it's a woman. Right. You're a strong, masculine Roosevelt woman.

What do you think about that grand-nephew-in-law of yours, Eleanor Roosevelt? Fine. Fine, I'd say. Sure. What? The democratic wing of our family was not as, how should I say, adept with the ladies as I was.

You're saying Eleanor Roosevelt wasn't as with the ladies as you are? Well, my understanding is that she may have had some masculine qualifications of her own, according to my book. No, that bitch was gay. Yeah. That bitch was so gay. She... Hicks. It was her and the reporter, Hicks. So I understand.

So I've been led to believe. President Roosevelt, you got obsessed with simplified spelling and you started spelling everything phonetically in all your letters and pissed off Congress by ordering all documents issued to the White House to be spelled phonetically. People don't know that about you. I think it's one of your best qualities. You're ahead of your time.

What made you decide you wanted everything to be spelled phonetically? Because I was boxed to the face, so I was half blind, and there was no other way to read. Right. Got it. Let me tell you something. If you enter the ring with a boxing glove, and you had to go four rounds against an anthropomorphic medicine ball, you, too, would lose sight in one eye, and you, too, would demand that everything be spelled phonetically, as these United States deserve.

My greatest recommendation to you, Vice President Harris, is that you, if you want to crack the state of North, East, West, and South Carolina, I recommend phonetic spelling. John, I think you should leave... And statehood for Arizona. I think you should leave the room while we have a moment. Oh, he's really going. I'll just be back here. You guys have your moment for one second. I want to talk about guns. Firearms. Yeah, you're a Republican who's super into guns and hunting. And you know, I have a gun. Okay.

There was one person who was way too into it. That is something that does work on certain kinds of swing voters such as myself. A Democrat, no. But with a gun, maybe. I was going to ask. It makes you like me, right? It does indeed. I have a gun right now. Of course you do. It's a gun in my pocket. Well, I speak softly, but I carry a big stick, I'll have you know. All right, I'm glad I came back when I did before this got out of hand. Uh...

Do you have any parting thoughts for us, President Roosevelt? Because we're here in Vice President Kamala Harris's dream, and she must be having to be woken up in a few minutes for another interview. And I was just wondering if you have any parting thoughts, given that we only have so little time with someone who, you know, is so handsome. That's right. Uh-oh. I cut a figure of raw, masculine, American frontier sexuality.

Take a look, folks. This is what everybody was fiddling it to some 130, 500 years ago. When I stood on the back of those railroad cars and delivered those speeches slapping against my thigh and hip, which absolutely hastened my early demise...

People were looking at me from below the tracks. Atchison, Topeka, Santa Fe, the Indiana and so and so railroad. And they were looking up at me and you could see their petticoats flapping. I know what that means. Wow. We all know what that means. Kamal, any final thoughts? That was hot. That was so dumb. I loved it. Every moment of it. Wow. Before you go, Teddy, can I ask? Yes, my kitten?

Why did you do all the weird crap? All the eccentric hobbies, obsession with side quests that got you tropical diseases. Why'd you do that? You mean the collection of animals? The Amazonian taper? Yeah, the Amazonian taper. Yeah. The giant Wyoming sloth? Yeah, the Wyoming sloth. That I kept as a pet and rode as a workhorse and then ate as a meal? Yeah, why? Because, my dear, I would have gone insane.

The presidency of the United States, you see, is something that is not meant for a mere shoulders of one feeble man or something else. Do you believe that anyone could handle the presidency of the United States, the pressure thereof, for eight years or almost, in case you took over right after someone else was elected and entered office, as I did when McKinley was so tragically shot and changed history for the better? Yeah!

I would have lost my mind, my dear. I had to hunt a dozen rhinoceroses just so I could get to my first presidential election. But then, by God, I won.

They don't know whether to like me or not, and I like it that way. Yeah, I don't either, to be honest. But you know what? What? I like that. I think I'm going to go to a 24-hour gun range at 2 a.m. and laugh like Jack Nicholson's the Joker. You know, the best and only Joker, because that's what I need, okay, to stay positive. And I will become the president of the United States. All right. Well...

I think it's time to wake up. I have never been more enamored of a woman who had all the powers of a man and all the better things of the other sex that I can't even bring myself to say in words. All right. My exotic flower. Uh-oh. All right, get out of here, Teddy Roosevelt. He kept a PG for you. Oh, he's still wounded. God, it's so hot. He's so wounded. I will continue these remarks at a further time. All right.

President Teddy Roosevelt, everybody. From deep within the wells of Kamala's subconscious. And you know, next time you're here, you better be wearing a cowboy hat, spectacles, and nothing else. Well, let's see if I can get my suspenders off. It takes 35 minutes to put them on. Teddy Roosevelt, everybody. Bye, Teddy. Thank you, my nightingale. Kamala, wake up. Kamala, you gotta wake up. What? What?

Oh, no, no, what? Oh. John, what the hell are you doing here? Where are we, a gay haunted house? All right. Give it up for Vice President Kamala Harris and former President Teddy Roosevelt, everybody. All right. I'm going to go take a nap. Kamala's got to go take a nap. All right. And we're back. Please welcome to the stage the man behind the mysteries, the one and only Damon Lindelof.

Hi. Thanks for being here. Come on in. All right. How you doing? I'm fantastic. How are you? Thanks for having me. Thanks for being here. All right. So big fan. When I learned so much about Teddy Roosevelt, there was a lot of Teddy Roosevelt backs that really floored us. He became interested in jujitsu at one point and tried to get the whole military to learn jujitsu. I love a person that leads by just brief enthusiasms. Uh,

So when we were talking about what to talk about, we couldn't believe how many incredible projects you've been a part of. Leftovers, Watchmen, Mrs. Davis was one that I loved most recently, which a lot of people didn't see. No one even knows it exists. Which we're going to come back to, which is exciting. We'll have some fun with that. And here's what I was actually thinking about when I looked at all the different series and movies you've been a part of is a lot of them are incredible projects.

but seemed to me unpitchable that these are ideas that only work once you see them because every single part of them managed to be excellent. But if you described it on paper, like we, I don't even want to spoil what Mrs. Davis is because we're going to talk about it later. But like, even if you describe the leftovers or you talk about the watchman that you were a part of,

it doesn't come across because I like, I'm curious about how you talk to executives and made them understand what you were trying to see, because it is like an act of persuasion. Um, thanks for saying all that. Um,

I think in the case of The Leftovers and Watchmen, Leftovers was based on an incredible book by Tom Perato. Watchmen was a graphic novel, 12 issues of a comic book that came out in the 80s. And so there's some basic familiarity, and then you're sort of trying to explain to someone why it matters to you and why the why now of it all. Lost, which was the first show that I did. Thank you very much.

Just had its 20th anniversary. I think that there are, you know, speaking of jujitsu, I think that like there's something about the entertainment business where everyone says that they want something original, but they actually don't. They want something familiar. So you kind of have to pivot on both feet and say that the show is like, oh, it's still lost. I thought they were found. Twist. Great. Lost again.

But people don't want something original, but you give them something original. Right, you give them something original. And so you kind of try not to talk yourself in circles, as I'm doing now, and make it simple. You talk about the characters, but then you ultimately say, this is going to be a television show unlike anyone has ever seen before, and therefore, how can I possibly explain it to you? And sometimes they buy it.

Well, I mean, but some, they don't actually like, have there been moments where like you deliver like a version of the pilot of the first episode of Watchmen and like, oh, this is different than anything we could have possibly expected. And it's, and we're like, are there ever been unpleasant surprises that they actually were given something unexpected? I think all the time. I mean, I...

there's definitely a be careful what you wish for aspect to it all. You sit in a room with a bunch of writers, as I know that you've done, and you try to kind of delight each other and surprise one another and scare one another. And I start to feel really comfortable when I get uncomfortable. And so that's the idea that kind of turns...

us on collectively. And then once it breaks out of that enclave of the room and suddenly you have to share it with other people, um, that's the moment where they, they realize, Oh, uh, this is not what I signed up for. And I do think that there's kind of like a fun mischief in, in the act of kind of, uh,

being at war with television executives and studio executives, I think the more uncomfortable that we make them sometimes, the more delighted that they are. I don't think anybody goes to work wanting to be bored. I think that people are sometimes scared of losing their jobs. But if you ask them, you know, 20 years after they retire, like, what are the moments that they remember? It tends to be the craziest shit that they permitted. You talked about the leftovers. I love the leftovers. The leftovers...

was obviously prescient in the sense that it was about a bunch of people collectively dealing with the trauma of a sudden loss. You talked about the first season versus the second and third season, that in the first season, I was against any level of humor because humor would not exist in this space. And I think that was completely and totally the wrong instinct. I'm curious, like,

If that was the wrong instinct, because just dramatically, whatever, creatively, the show needed to be lighter. I mean, you threw out the credits and did fun credits in Steve, which I think was like an unsubtle way of making that point. But was it also something that you took away from like even just thinking about post pandemic about how we handle moments of crisis?

That's a really interesting question. I mean, Tom Parada wrote the book sort of in response to 9-11 in a lot of ways several years later, and The Leftovers came out before the pandemic. But I think I, like you, am a Jew. I was raised in the Jewish culture, and we do not do humor and sadness and death at the same time. There's a rending of garments, and there's a sitting of Shiva, and we're not an uncomedic people. But I think we tend to take loss very seriously.

The Catholics, on the other hand, they're having a fucking great time. They get, you know, an Irish wake is like, oh, I would literally like kill somebody to get to be invited to one of those things. And so I think that's sort of like the energy of,

how do we respond to shocking loss to create like sort of the entire parabola of we're kind of quietly going insane and sometimes insanity is quite fun. And that was the energy that we got into. And I think that when we were all sort of

it's hard to think about and remember how crazy we were in the first couple of months of COVID and like March and April of 2020, when, you know, my wife and I were, were literally like comparing notes with leaving our groceries out in the sun and, and how we should like wipe them down with Clorox and, and, and et cetera, et cetera. And it's like those things, um,

actually make us feel better psychologically, these rites and rituals. And so that's a lot of world religions and cults are sort of based on these are the things that you need to do to feel less pain. And the show is really fixated on that idea. Yeah. But then-

I mean, it would be nice to have like an Irish Shiva, you know? It would. Like there's no reason. You can mix it up. Yeah. It's like, it's funny. It's, it isn't, it isn't a space for alcohol, the Shiva. And it's eight days. Right. Isn't it? Or six days. Too long. Seven. I don't know. I was, I mixed it up with Hanukkah. I don't know. I'm not sure. Yeah. It's not, it's not Hanukkah. Yeah. But it, and we've always said that. It's, it's beautiful. Shiva's awesome. I don't want to, you know, I have been to some excellent Shivas, but they're, they're not laugh rides. Hey, no, no.

Listen, the Shiva community is not going to be upset. People know that Shiva's are not fun and there's nothing wrong with admitting that Shiva's, they're no fun. They're not, they're not fun, you know, but they could be a little bit drunker. Uh, as the creator of lost any advice for someone who just left an island, uh,

You know, you got done dirty. Thank you, man. And no spoilers, I haven't seen last night's episode yet. We watched Religiously with my family. We are huge Survivor fans. We're...

Very, very excited to see you on there. And I can't wait to see Andy go, but I will say there is glory in going first. Like if you go fifth, if you go ninth, the worst thing you can be on Survivor is the goat at the very end, you know, the third, the person who gets literally no votes. You went hard. As you said yourself, it was a perfect episode. Thank you for saying that.

It's, um, no, no, I agree. It is the funniest way to go.

I just have one question, though, which is there's that one clip that they show us and you're kind of introducing yourself to your tribe mates. And I think you must have said that you were from L.A. because one of them says, oh, are you from WeHo? Yes. And then you said, no, not from WeHo, but I have this podcast. It's kind of a big deal. And it's called, have you guys heard of Pod Save America or Crooked Media or whatever? And they were like, no, no, no. And I was like, in the Venn diagram of people who know what WeHo is.

but have never heard the podcast, I just felt like that was a very narrow sliver. So did we miss something? Was something edited out? - So first of all, so that's Anika who's getting a lot of shit for the fact, people are like, oh, you're gay and you're from Los Angeles, we ho? No.

I think there's more people knew about. I think like there was more information. It's an edit. It's a joke. It's the edit was very fair, but yes, there's a lot more, there's more context there. Like there's a moment where I'm like, I love Tik TOK. It is very embarrassing and I deserve to be embarrassed, but there was a longer conversation. You know, it's so there was that. As a 51 year old, I think 41 is still quite young. So no. And that's what I thought too, until I got there. Yeah.

So you just announced a Green Lantern show. It's called Lanterns because we all agreed that the green was stupid. Right. So now it's just Lanterns. So Green Lantern, Lantern, the Lantern. So you can make anything you can imagine? If you have this magical ring, yes. And the fights are still closed? Yeah. Yeah.

Interesting. Interesting. Can I see about World War Z? Please. I love World War Z. And here's what I think was cool about World War Z. It's a rare success for the reshoots. Like people like it was like it was, you know, covered as like a cursed production. And like it got like kind of like criticism for that. And oh, the end had to be changed. I liked it. Why wasn't there a second World War Z? I want to see what happens. I want to be in the world more. I would love to see another World War Z. Yeah.

Any more Brad fighting zombies, great. I hear they've been working on it for a number of years and could happen, could maybe not happen. I haven't gotten any inquiries. I always sign up for zombies. They're the best.

Yeah. Do you like slow zombies or fast zombies? Fast ones. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Although who wrote that book that talked about how the only chance any of us would ever have would be against slow zombies that if we're talking about a world with fast zombies, we're fucked anyway. Slow zombies are the only way we got a chance. That's a book. It was a whole book. Wow. I think it's the zombie survival guy. Um, what was up with that polar bear? Yeah.

Still working on it. Yeah. You never cracked that polar bear. No, they, there was a, you know, do you really want me to answer? There's a, there's a Dharma initiative. They, they came from Ann Arbor. They were doing experiments on the Island. Polar bears are very territorial. They were trying to medicate them so that they wouldn't be so aggressive and, and, and, and basically extrapolate that into some form of world peace. One of them got out and started biting people.

I was mad at you about something. I'm realizing now in this very moment, that's what I was mad about, which is I was really into lost. I was really into lost. And then I think you in an interview were asked about the polar bear and you said, Oh, we're not really sure what that was there for. There was an interview. Someone gave an interview saying, we are not totally sure when we put the polar bear in, we weren't sure what the polar bear would be. Are you sure that wasn't JJ? It might've been JJ. Yeah. We were, we're, we both wear glasses.

Well, it was a print interview when I was younger, so I didn't know. I wasn't in the business at the time. I was just mad because I thought, if you don't know the answer, neither of us know the answer, then what are we doing here with a polar bear? I'm going to be honest with you because I don't want you to be angry. There were some things, a few things on Lost that we were figuring out as we went along. You son of a bitch. But the polar...

But the polar bear was not one of them. In the very early days, we were like, they were doing weird experiments and the polar bear got loose from a cage on the island, which is kind of more or less what it was. I hate when that happens with my polar bear. Thank you. All right. Well, I'm glad, honestly, I'm glad we resolved that. Now, that's a good example of how your shows inspire intense, longstanding fandoms. I am no exception to that, which is why we're going to play a game we're calling Master of None. Oh, my God. Wow. Wow.

Here's how it works. I'm going to go into the audience and find volunteers. You're going to ask our audience questions about the best TV show of the last 10 years, Mrs. Davis. Okay. I love Mrs. Davis. I don't think anybody's seen it, so this should be interesting. Be honest. How many of you have watched all of Mrs. Davis? There's three people. Wow. Peacock, everybody.

All right, do you have questions or do I need to get to the start? This bit's gonna go great. All right, so it's time for Masters of None. All right. Hi, what's your name? Sarah. Have you seen Mrs. Davis? Not at all. Okay, Damon, ask the first question. This is great. First question, Sarah, who is Mrs. Davis? Any guess, just shoot for it. A woman in a pier. Wrong. Who's Mrs. Davis?

Susan Sarandon. No, that's just an actor. That's a good guess. I haven't seen it, but I assume AI. Yes! Hey! All right, Damon, go to the second question. That's true. It is an AI. It's an AI. In the first episode, we find out that Mrs. Davis, who is an AI, as we've just established, wants to destroy what ancient item? A, the Ark of the Covenant, B, the Holy Grail, C, the Shroud of Turin, or D, the Three Sacred Treasures of Japan? Hi, what's the answer?

The Holy Grail. That's right. Wow. This show sounds great. It's really good. Nobody saw Mrs. Davis. Nobody saw it. Nobody saw even a shot of it. You don't get nice things because you didn't watch Mrs. Davis. Hi, what's your name? Jack. David, ask another question. Okay, Sister Simone, the disgruntled nun played by the terrific Betty Gilpin, she's amazing, on Mrs. Davis spends her spare time debunking what profession and why. Wow, if you get this...

Taxidermy. No. Chiropractic. No. That's a good one to debunk, though. ER doctor. ER doctor? Did he say character debunks doctors? They're not debunkable. They're good. AI. No, that's not a profession. That would be good. Psychiatry. No, getting closer. Social work. Debunking social work? Somebody's got to.

It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic. It's magic.

Big, big shout out to Tara Hernandez, who co-created the show. She's an amazing writer. Next question. Which is not something that happens in the show, Mrs. Davis? A. Despondent upon discovering his liver transplant was fake, a man enters a rodeo to prove himself. B. A man is electrocuted by lightning. C. A pope reveals an ad for sneakers. Or D. Someone gets crucified big time. Out of those, the lightning seems the most boring, so I'm going to go with lightning.

Wrong! They all happen in Mrs. Davis! All of them. I think they're gonna want to watch the show now. Finally, what is the Lazarus Shroud? What is the Lazarus Shroud? Any guesses? Oh, I have the last one. I got nothing on this. I can... Oh, yes. I remember what it is. And it's insane. This is an unguessable thing. Why don't you tell us, John? Oh, it's a special suit that protects you from the acid inside of a whale's stomach. This is a show on peacock. Yeah.

All right. We were ahead of our time on that. Didn't RFK have some whale carcass? That's right. That's right. All right. And this is the final question. Oh, you're supposed to ask it. Oh, why do you think this show spoke to me, John Lovett, so deeply? Um...

Okay. Why do I think that it spoke to you so deeply? Yeah. Why did I like it so much? I think you have a background in mathematics and then you segued into creativity. And that strikes me as the kind of person who wants to have

and sensical answers to the world, but you've come to sort of migrate at this point in your life to realize that you don't, but religion doesn't provide you with the answers that you crave. And so shows like this speak to your sense of how the world works and why we're all alive. I mean, that's incorrect. It's because McDornan is hot, but... He is. He is very hot. Damon Lindelof, everybody. Thank you.

When we come back, it's time for Hot Takes. Don't go anywhere. This is Love It or Leave It, and there's more on the way.

Support for Love It or Leave It comes from the International Rescue Committee. The IRC works in more than 40 countries, serving people whose lives have been upended by war, conflict and natural disasters. In places like Gaza, Ukraine and Sudan, displaced families are experiencing war, extreme hunger and life-threatening injuries. The humanitarian suffering in Gaza is catastrophic. The ongoing violence, bombardment and blockade have caused more than two million Palestinians, half of them children, to be without clean water, food and critical medical care.

Nearly 1.9 million Palestinians, about 80% of the population, are estimated to be internally displaced. Some have been displaced multiple times. The lack of safe water, medicine, and healthy food contributes to the spread of diseases, and children are especially at risk. In Gaza, the International Rescue Committee is direct

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This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. What's something that scares you? Share a fear no matter how big or small. I'm afraid that I might go on a reality show and spend months getting ready and then actually end up going home first and having that be a secret I keep from people until the day on the calendar arrives. We're going to talk about this later, but I think that you actually won in this scenario compared to others. That's true. I'm glad to hear that, Tommy. I can't wait to hear more of your thoughts

in an actual show, not an ad. We all need therapy is the point. You need therapy. I need therapy. I need more therapy than ever. Actually, when you go on certain reality shows, they'll give you a therapist. Really? Yeah. I should have given that other guy one.

I hope he's taking advantage. It's entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and switch therapist anytime for no additional charge. Therapy's great. I texted my therapist and I said, after the election, we gotta start therapy again. So that's something I did. That's good. Visit betterhelp.com slash love it. I just think it's a good thing to do. Everybody needs therapy. I'm actually in a very good place, believe it or not.

Believe it. It's true. But maybe you're not or maybe you are and you should just get some therapy anyway because everybody needs it. Everybody. BetterHelp. H-E-L-P dot com slash love it. BetterHelp.com slash love it. And we're back. All right.

It's time to sit back, relax, and enjoy an ice cold glass of Heinz ketchup because Love It or Leave It is headed to the Roxian in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania on Friday, October 4th. We'll help take the hedge off the last few last for election day with comedian Mateo Lane, playwright R. Eric Thomas, and PA's own congressional candidate Janelle Stelzen. We want the Roxian to be as stuffed with lowly fans as your sandwiches are stuffed with French fries.

So grab your tickets at crooked.com slash events. See you there. That one's almost sold out. Also, Empire City. Earlier this week, Eric Adams became the first mayor of New York City in history to be federally indicted while in office. But we all know that corruption doesn't stop in City Hall. So who is the badge created to protect and who does it really serve? From Wondery, Crooked Media, and Push Black,

Our newest podcast, Empire City, the untold story of the NYPD, takes a deep dive into the hidden history of New York's police department, one of the oldest and largest forces in the world, giving you everything you need to understand policing's past and where it's headed. Follow Empire City. Couldn't be more timely. It's excellent. It is excellent. Wherever you get your podcasts, binge all episodes early, ad-free with Wondery Plus, in the Wondery app, or on Apple Podcasts. All right. Please welcome back to the stage, for the first time, our wonderful guests, Allison Reese and James Adomian. Woo!

Hi, Allison. Hi, James. Nice to see you. How are you? Pleasure. How are you? All right. Now it is time for Hot Takes. Here's how it works. A take will be thrown up on the screen for each of us. I have genuinely not seen these. These are written for us by the producers of the show. You have 30 seconds to try as hard as you can to defend the take. If you don't like it, you can skip it, but the next one may be worse. We'll each get one skip. Let's see what we have.

Ellen did nothing wrong. Skip. Skip. That's the one you... Too far. Project 2025 isn't all bad. Um...

Yeah, here's why Project 2025 isn't all bad. Every once in a while in a cartoon, the coyote will end up dressed in a beautiful dress and have lipstick on, or Elmer Fudd will somehow dress up as a beautiful woman to try to trick Bugs Bunny into something that isn't good for Bugs Bunny. Yeah.

And in many ways, that's what the Republican Party is. It is nice that Project 2025 just there is no it is the removal of any doubt about what they represent. Like this is this is who we are. It is down on paper. I like that. It's it's reminiscent to me of how I really like New York mean over Midwest nice.

Because I know what I'm getting. Yeah. As opposed to like guessing of like what the fuck it means when you say. Yeah. Like who's the lipstick on a pig for? You're still fucking a pig and it's not persuasive. Let's see what's next. James, from the right angle, JD Vance is kind of hot. From the right angle, JD Vance is kind of hot. What angle? Face down, lights off. No.

I'm sorry. That was my fault. That's on me. That's on me. That one's on me. I'm sorry I did that. That's on me. Look, I was given a play, and I did it. I'm a football player. You know what? The coach calls the play. I do it. J.D. Vance would be fine if he wasn't a public figure or, like, doing anything. If you...

Right. Like if it was just some guy that you would run into in the community, like out and about like, Oh, it's this guy at the bar. That would be fine. If he was just some guy you'd run into and be right, he would, he would be wrong and kind of laugh at his own jokes. Yeah, no, there, there's something interesting about Vance versus Trump. Like why does the stick from Trump give Trump the same lines as Vance? They work for Trump. They don't work for Vance. I feel like it's the difference between, um,

anger and disdain. Like Trump always seems angry. JD Vance always seems like he's full of like anger plus disgust. Like Trump doesn't do that in the same way. Trump is furious, but almost like there's a, his anger, despite everything we know about him, there's a performance of hope inside of his anger. Like he's, it's his version. He's righteously indignant on the behalf of people. With Vance, it's disgust and anger, it's contempt.

it's disdain. It's an unsolvable anger. He really did get picked in the, like the depths of his emo phase. Yes. Well, that's why he has the eyeliner too. I mean, he's got, he's got peeling posters of Ronald Reagan up in his bedroom, talking on the phone at night. Remember when that story broke that Josh Hawley had a picture of a super, super hot guy holding a baby in his dorm room. And he said the reason he had the poster up in his dorm room is because he was pro-life. Let's see what's next.

Allison, I wish I could give birth to Mudang. I love her so much. She is my daughter. No. You people weren't here last week. I think Mudang is gross. Sorry. All right. I wish I could give birth to Mudang. I love her so much. She's my daughter. Have you seen my slimy, bulbous daughter, Mudang? Isn't she gorgeous? Here she is now. Mudang, my sweet honey. I'm so excited.

Hungry, hungry. She's a hungry, hungry hippo, and I need to get this some marbles quickly. My sweet, sweet daughter. I think she's going to change the world, and I think she's beautiful and not disgustingly wet at all times. Mudang. R.I.P. No, Mudang's alive. What? Guys fall for it every time. All right, let's see who's next. Oh, okay.

It's the silver alert. They went missing again. Are they testing the system? Maybe. I think it's sort of percolating slowly through the room. Nerds need to calm down already. Nerds. Yeah. Nerds, of which I am one. Uh-huh. And so I know what I mean and what I say.

is that we need to calm down. We need to take it down a notch. We get too upset about the wrong casting decision or our favorite shows ending poorly or great or being divisive. All of these things. We got to live our lives, man. We got to get out. We got to get in the ocean, take hikes, get some sunlight, be with our friends, eat good food.

And you think nerds can do that? And argue about who the best joker is. Because that's really the only question that matters. And I am curious, who is the best joker? Who do you think the best joker is? I think the... This is a bit of a cop-out. I will say my two favorite jokers. Okay. Well, I'm going to do three favorite jokers. Oh.

But I'll say this. What a politician. I'm going to say Heath Ledger to me is the greatest joker. Like I think that's, I don't have a, I don't have a, I don't have an impression. I don't have like a contrarian take. I was going to say that Mark Hamill's cartoon joker is phenomenal. And the, was it Cesar Romero? Cesar Romero, yes. In the Adam West was so funny. He's the funniest. He's so, he's just so hammy. I love those. Who's your favorite joker?

I was going to go with Heath Ledger. He's, he, he's, he's a fan favorite and fantastic. Won the Oscar. Yeah, no, I, it's, he was wrong. And here's why. Oh, because we're always wrong. Right. Because if we're right, then we can't fight about it. Well, and that's why we as nerds need to calm down. Well, here's what I do. I think that like two things have happened. I'm actually, you're like, I think part of the reason. So being a nerd used to be a hard skill and then it became a soft skill.

Being a nerd used to require knowing how to get information, where to go, who to talk to, the stores, the library. Like there were steps you had to take, people you need to know. Like it was being a nerd required being a bit of a detective. To have a hobby took a lot of work and it became more of a soft skill. You just, everyone has access to everything. And so how do you prove how much you're a nerd when all the information is available to everyone all the time, when you can go on YouTube and find the deepest of deep cuts of

it's everything has been flattened. And I think the way people demonstrate now how, how much they are nerds is in part by their passion. And I feel like that create, and because you have access to the people and that creating the things you're passionate about, it's kind of like, it's a, it's a reinforcing, it's a vicious circle, right? The only way I can prove how much I'm a nerd is through my emotion. And Oh, by the way, I get feedback on those emotions in a way that wouldn't have happened a generation ago. And I think that together has like been like a toxic combination. Yeah.

I would also say, in addition to agreeing with everything that you just said, that when I was a nerd in the 80s, which is when it was absolutely terrible,

Like, there was no upside. But now, like, President Obama is also a nerd. And so our territory, nerd territory, can be infringed upon by jocks who like science fiction, but nerds can't fucking play sports. So we don't have our own territory anymore, and that's why we get so feisty about... Right, because people still claim the mantle. As a cool ally, I just want to thank you...

For having this conversation. My ears are open and I'm learning and I'm listening. That's beautiful. And I really, I just, I appreciate what's going on here. I think the best Joker has to be from 1989, Jack Nicholson. Wow. Winged freak terrorizes. Wait till they get a load of me.

Pretty good. Jack Nicholson was awesome as the Joker. You know, not enough is said about how the 1989 Batman really is the thing that opened the door to movies only getting to be about one thing. And that's Hot Takes. When we come back, we're going to end on a high note. And we're back. Because we all need it, here it is, this week's high note.

Hi, Lovett and team. My name is Laura, and my high note is that on September 27th, my husband Mark celebrated 12 years of sobriety. I am so proud of him and grateful for how committed he is to his recovery. Without this commitment, we would not have recently celebrated nine years together or have our beautiful two-year-old son, Jamie.

Importantly, Mark is of service to others and is involved in leading a recovery group and also sponsors others to help them get into recovery. Mark, you are a wonderful husband and dad, and I love you so much.

Hi, Love It. I'm Kendra from Chicago. And my high note is that with so much help from my amazing bandmates in She's Crafty, Chicago's all-female BC Voice tribute, I hosted a hugely successful postcards to voters event at a local bar this past week. I hosted two other nights in June and early July where a total of 10 people came and shared

Eight of them were my close friends. This week, about 50 people showed up on a Tuesday night and wrote 1,000 postcards.

People are so excited and want to do something. It gave me so much hope and I realized that even in deep blue Chicago, in a deep blue neighborhood, people aren't sure how to find opportunities to volunteer. So it's up to us unhealthy political weirdos to not only help our communities find those opportunities, but to create them.

So love it, audience. Let's grab the normies in our lives and LFG. Thank you.

Huge news. If you want to send us a high note, it's L-O-L-I high notes, lowly high notes at crooked.com. We did it. We did it. It only took us eight years to finally get our own email address. Or if you're a friend of the pod subscriber, you have the exclusive ability to leave us your high notes without the hassle of a call or email. Head over to the friend of the pod discord server and post a comment in the love it or leave it channel or the high notes channel for a chance to hear it featured on the show.

That is our show. Thank you so much to David Lindelof, Alison Reese, James Adomian. 37 days until the 2024 elections. If you haven't signed up yet, do me a favor. Sign up at votesaveamerica.com. Have a great night and have a great weekend.

Love It or Leave It is a Crooked Media production. It is written and produced by me, John Lovett, and Lee Eisenberg. Kendra James is our executive producer. Chris Lord is our producer. And Kennedy Hill is our associate producer. Hallie Keeper is our head writer. Sarah Lazarus and Jocelyn Kaufman, Peter Miller, Alan Pierre, Will Miles, and Mahana Del Shiki are our writers. Evan Sutton is our editor. Kyle Seglin and Charlotte Landis provide audio support. Stephen Colon is our audio engineer. And Milo Kim is our videographer. Our theme song is written and performed by Sure Sure.

Thanks to our designer, Bernardo Serna, for creating and running all of our visuals, which you can't see because this is a podcast. And to our digital producers, David Toles, Claudia Shang, Mia Kelman, and Matt DeGroat for filming and editing video each week so you can.

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They're back. Verizon Small Business Days are here. October 14th to the 20th. Meet with our experts. Get one-on-one advice, a free tech check, and special offers. Like a free 5G phone when you switch. Don't miss out. Call 1-800-483-4428. Or go to verizon.com slash smallbusiness. Offer available for select 5G phones. New device payment purchase agreement and select biz unlimited plan required. Credit applied over agreement term up to 36 months. Terms apply. Limited time offer.

Carl's Jr.'s Big Carl fans know nothing beats the layers and layers of flavor of a Big Carl. Nothing beats that charbroiled beef, American cheese, and tangy Carl's classic sauce. Nothing. Except getting a second Big Carl for just $1. Big Carl just one-upped itself for just $1. Then buy one Big Carl, get one for a buck deal. Only at Carl's Jr. Get burger! Get burger. Available for a limited time at participating restaurants. Tax not included. Price may vary. Not valid with any other offer, discount, or combo.