It's the top. It's Jackson Claude. It's your favorite show. The fast five things you need to know. We'll start your day off swirly. It's the toast. They sound amazing. Welcome back to the toast and happy.
Oh, Monday. Am I okay? I was about to think Tuesday. I don't know why I would think such a thing. There's never been such a Monday in the history of Mondays. Let's try that again. Welcome back to the Toast. Happy Monday. Tourney Lou Freebush here. Excited to be sitting down with one of the world's leading Disney adults. It is my sister, my co-host. If only that were true, Claudia. If only that were true. Like last time we went to Disney, we went to Disney a year ago. Now that we live in Florida, I do think it's like an annual thing. One, our passes are so cheap when you're a Florida resident because I guess
like some of our taxes go towards Disney so we get kickbacks I'm not complaining I had the same takeaway last year which is that I am not the elk of a Disney person like I'm having fun because my children are having fun and I'm happy to be here and it is the happiest place on earth but I am not made of the stuff that Olivia is made of and that my husband is made of where they thrive in a Disney like environment it
It's important that when going to Disney with the kids and taking it, you know, taking on this journey. And again, I've never done it, but it's important that there are people in the group who can handle it and people in the group that can. I just feel like that dynamic is really important to balance each other out. Yeah, everyone has their strengths. This time I didn't go on a lot of rides because I'm a nauseous queen and I watched this stuff and I got the food. So every time they came off a ride, pretzel.
It's really nice to be the person whose job it is to watch the stuff. The thing is they have stroller parking at Disney, and this is actually like to Disney's credit. You just like park your stroller at stroller parking, and you go on the ride, and you enjoy your life. And there's really like – I mean I don't know, but there's like not crime at Disney. No one's like pillaging the strollers that are filled with stuff. I'm sure you could find everyone's everything in there, but it's really –
Like you're operating on the honor policy and it works quite well. Well, to any, you know, aspiring criminals listening, it seems like Disney is ripe with opportunity. The only problem is it's so expensive to get in the park. I don't know if you can make up for your ticket, especially if you're not a Florida resident and you're not getting those savings.
Right. And it's not like the New York City subway where you could just sort of like hop the turnstiles like they have maximum security. Heck no. It's maximum security at every turn. And I do think seasoned Disney people, which everyone there is like they travel. They like they don't keep valuables in their stroller. People's got their fanny pack. They wear their fanny pack on the ride that has their room key and their money. Yeah. So people have it games. But no, it really is lovely that that's actually not a concern anymore.
You don't need someone to watch the stuff, though I'm always happy to offer. I love like my favorite thing when being at an outing is like being the person whose job it is to like sit and watch the stuff. Now, this is my question for you, because obviously I haven't been to Disney as a grown person. I went one time like when me and Ben first started dating. I was doing like a work thing in Orlando and he made me go and I had like seriously the worst fucking time of my life.
So when I think about the future, obviously, like as a parent one day, it's sort of rite of passage. You have to take your kids to Disney. I definitely really worry about the amount of like standing and walking like on my body. And I'm just curious if you feel like there's an adequate amount of seating available. Like are there lots of benches? Like I feel like I would always be looking for a place to sit and not being able to find one. And that's what concerns me about the future. There are a lot of benches. There are a lot of like perches where –
there's like a fountain you can sit on. Yeah. Like there's seating. What I would like a little bit more of, though, I know it's tough given the natural elements, a little more shade. I,
I got a sunburn, I guess. Yeah. Because I was wearing a T-shirt that when I went to Linky yesterday on my LTK, like it is a sleep shirt, but it was the right shade of blue. So it's like very flimsy. It's a type of sleep shirt where you wake up with a titty out. Yeah. It was like flimsy and thin. So not only was like my chest exposed, but I don't even know, like it's not for sun. So I did get a bit of a sunburn. And I do appreciate shade, but I know it just depends on the solstice and the trees. Of course.
But there are so much is dependent on the solstice. Yeah, there are places in which to sit, but there is a lot of walking and that's just the deal. However, you know, there is Disney VIP, right? Yes. I know all the celebs do Disney VIP. I heard it's like $5,000 a day and that's insane. Yeah, I think it's like I guess we only go for two days. That's why it's like quoted $10,000. That's insane.
Well, maybe. But do you get a golf cart? Perhaps not. So insane. This time I was at Disney VIP was looking good. Yeah, of course. But like what's VIP about it? They help you like cut the lines and stuff or do you get a trolley? I'm pretty sure it's like no lines, easy entrance, like back entrance into the park. No lines there again. When there's the parade and the
show at the castle and everything you're the fireworks you are front row like all the way to the top if I were to ever do VIP we need to be with more people so that we're really getting bang for our buck and when the kids are a little older and they actually do more rides right now we just like you know futz around on Finding Nemo like that's not what the lines are for yeah no that's not VIP worthy yeah so that's the takeaway one day I will do it though and I'll let you guys know how it is
Well, I like that you got dressed for the occasion with your Disney outfits. Like you were giving Disney adult, but it's nice to know that beyond the facade of your Instagram story, like there was a woman suffering. Yeah, I am not a Disney adult. Like, and I don't say that with pride, you know? No, no, I just want to say the reason I keep calling Jackie a Disney adult is because, you know, as a protective mama bear, like you don't post your kids on social media. So it literally looks like you and Zach and Olivia and Zach went to,
Disney's the four of us just like bopping around Epcot. Yeah. And so that's why I keep calling you a Disney adult. But if you knew the real subtext, you know it's because Jackie's a queen. Yeah. I understand that. And I can take that. And I just want to say like being a Disney adult like means a lot of things. Of course, of course, mental illness. But it means you have strength. It means you have fortitude. Yes.
Like, could I say it also means you have courage, like because you don't give a fuck what people say about you. There's so many. I feel like it's really become like within popular culture, like jokes about I see it on like every like late night show now, like Disney adults is kind of like the punching bag of society. And let me tell you, they kind of just take it. You need to have a really strong sense of self to be a proud Disney adult. Yeah, it's very true. I was actually like looking around and I was thinking like it's the happiest place on earth. And it really is. Like, even if you're tired, you're in a bad mood, like you can't help but be like
cheered up by the music and the vibes and it's like the joy what if they just like went to Disney every day and just like live like you know people do that and just like enjoyed it all the time and yet no unless that's how you become a crazy person because like it's not the real world but I understand why people want to do that like why can't every day be a day at Disney I understand like the feeling of wanting that
Yeah. So I, um, I don't follow her, but this girl always comes up on my TikTok. She is like a bona fide Disney adult. She and her family moved to Orlando to be near the park. And so she'll like drop her kids off at school and she'll be like, all right, let's go on a walk. And she goes on a walk in the parking. She gets like, she'll go on to get my, I'm trying to do 10,000 steps. And so it's just like, it's her park, like where you would go for a central park walk. She's going to Disney. Yeah. No, but it really will make you a crazy person. Like thinking that that's how the world is that you don't have to look over your back that no one's like, you're
Really, Amy Adams in Enchanted, like walking around with your head up your ass. That's hilarious. That's what it is. You know what? It's nice. She's a quintessential Disney adult. I kind of get it. I do get it, but you have to be cautious. Okay.
Of course it's a slippery slope. You need like the right dose of real world and a sprinkle of Diz. And because you've decided to like make it like a max once a year type of thing but our sister Olivia who is like probably I would have thought like the least person I would suspect to become a Disney adult but meanwhile she like loves it so much planning with the apps. She thrives. She thrives. Do you think like she itches like she's counting down the minutes till next summer or like
I mean she could go without you but it's obviously more fun to go with all the kids together. Well she was going this weekend. She's like I think we're going to go to Disney this weekend. Like it just works out timing wise. The weather's going to be really good. Like we're going to go. Do you want to come?
And I couldn't say no because I knew it would be amazing. But it was really like her trip and we just hopped on. She was itching. She was itching. She was itching, but she would have gone without me. Right. It's like if we had plans, if this was the weekend that I had a wedding, if this was the weekend I'm in New York, like she would have been going without me. Well, Santa's coming to town, by the way. I know. I'm coming to New York this week. Bright lights, big titties, Jackson cleared. Straight from Orlando straight to New York.
Jackie's never been to my studio. You haven't seen the new digs. We're going to be filming here this week, which I'm so excited about. We have lots of fun and exciting projects. We're filming a commercial. We are. I'm like really like leading a life of regret.
Yeah, because, well, first of all, my Makatonim sister is getting married this weekend. Makatonim sister that we've been talking about. Ben's sister. I'm sorry. You guys are crazy. Ben's sister. Thank you. Is getting married this weekend. So Jax is coming to town. And of course, Jax never comes to town. So when she does, we like have to, you know, check off a bunch of things on our list. So much so to the point where we can't even enjoy the weekend because now we have a million things. We're interviewing somebody for the podcast. We have a merch photo shoot. We have a commercial photo. Like, why? Why?
Why? And now the redheads are like, let's record in person on Saturday. Oh, no, Saturday we're supposed to hang. No, I said, I said Saturday is my one like free day to enjoy. I actually, I'm going to think about it. I'll let you guys know.
Yeah. I feel like the redhead community will be okay if I push the episode back a week as opposed to like giving up my Saturday when I literally will not have one free moment in New York. And that's why I'm leading a life of regret because like, I just get so excited. I'm like work, like boss, babe, like I'm literally landing and getting a haircut. Like I'm just, it's crazy talk. That's really crazy. I know, but I want a haircut for Thursday. Like I want, of course, of course, of course. So duh, got to get a haircut when I land at the middle of the night. Well,
Well, it'll be an exciting weekend, a week for the toasters, Jackson, Claude, together in the big city. It will be an exciting week for the business. I just like, I just feel like unbalanced, you know? I feel like I'm grinding too hard. How many bags did you pack? You think I packed already? How many bags did you pack? Three. How many bucks did you pack? Two. And how many of yourselves are you bringing? Actually, three. Three.
Three bucks, two bags, one me. Oh my God. Speaking of musicals, something we have to talk about that's going on online. Mickey Blonsky. Thank you so much. You read my mind. Every day we wrap the show, I'm like, fuck, we didn't talk about Mickey Blonsky.
Which is so crazy because when nobody's talking about Nikki Blonsky, we are talking about Nikki Blonsky. It's so true. But now everybody's talking about Nikki Blonsky and we've kind of like not been a leading news source. And by the way, like the silence is deafening from us. So she's kind of having an organic moment on social media where a lot of like her crazy behavior over the last...
15 years since Hairspray came out, is just being revisited. Like wild interviews. She's been on Cameo for a while. And I guess if you're like us and you love Nikki Blonsky, I'm surprised we don't have one. Like a Cameo for Nikki Blonsky. Are they now going like $1,000 a pop now? She better have increased. She's the number two. The last time I checked, the number two most requested person on Cameo. I don't know how much she's charging. She better be charging minimum $1,000. Nikki, get your bag.
Nikki Blonsky cameo. $100. Nikki. She has 2,000 reviews. Wow. She's done a lot. I also want to say, I know everyone says this about everyone, but I don't say it lightly. And I mean it when I say it. That Nikki Blonsky does need to be cast on the next season of White Lotus. Yes.
Like that's how we can make things right. Heal. In this world. So let me tell you, if you guys don't know what's going on, this really originated on TikTok, but it's definitely like taking the entire internet by storm. Just like this really organic movement of just identifying and looking at Nikki Blonsky's career at a glance and how strange the whole thing was, right? If you don't know, she played Tracy Turnblad in like the most recent adaptation of Hairspray, which is the best one, alongside Zac Efron. Excluding Hairspray Live.
alongside Zac Efron, Amanda Bynes, like a star-studded cast. And she was cast through like an open casting call. She was a hairdresser in New Jersey. As Tracy always is.
It was totally kind of like a fairy tale, right? Plucked from obscurity, big Hollywood production. You're kissing Zac Efron. Like it's literally, you actually can't even write a fairy tale as storybook as that. I'm in love with you no matter what you weigh. Without love. I like how Tracy always has to be a casting, an open casting because like God forbid they made a fat person famous up until recently. Now,
Now everyone's like talking about, you know, when she was on the PR train for Hairspray at the time, I don't know if anybody thought anything of it, but like with hindsight, like she was doing and saying a lot of weird things, mostly about Zac Efron. She was clearly like in love with him because again, this was an actual regular person who
starring alongside, think about Zac Efron at the time, like off the heels of High School Musical, like a true teenage heartthrob. She's just a regular girl. And so she was like the type of girl who would go to like a Jonas Brothers concert and shave her vagina, like thinking that they were gonna have sex. But like, this was actually a real like moment for her. So she was like really bizarre on that,
press tour he was with Vanessa Ann Hudgens at the time and she was just like on the Wendy Williams show telling everyone that like Zach and Vanessa aren't gonna last like I think she really thought that like he was her boyfriend I think she had a hard time I just want to also say I like at
In defense of Nikki, Zach does this. And I've seen some of his clips from that time where he's kind of leading her on. But every time he's in a movie, he pretends like he's in love with the girl, the lead. He did it with Sunday and Greatest Showman. He did it for Baywatch. He does it for everything. And he did it with Nikki. And like, I'm sorry, she's the kind of girl, if you give her an inch, she's going to take a mile. That's actually a really good point. I'm here to defend. So.
So then like everything Nikki Blonsky's ever put out on social media is now under a microscope, like her incredibly bizarre tweets, her cameos, of course. And she's just kind of this person who really spiraled downward after Hairspray. And I actually did not know that she had a big scandal. Oh, I didn't know that either. But also I need you to
clarify spiral downward because it seems like this has been her personality since Hairspray. So you just mean like her career take like not ascending. Yes. Yes. Her career not ascending. But I did forget like I guess there was like a she had a little bit of momentum after Hairspray. It's not like she did Hairspray and nothing happened. I had totally forgotten. And now that people are resurging it, I saw the I saw like an old trailer. It was an ABC Family commercial for a new show they were doing called Huge.
And it was about a fat camp. And Nikki Blonsky is the main character. And like all the characters are fat. And it's like the craziest, wildest thing. And so she had a TV show on ABC Family. I think there was like a little bit of momentum for her. And then she ended up in a big scandal in the Turks and Caicos airport where her and her family got into like a physical and verbal fight with this other passenger who happened to be a girl who –
either won or was a contestant on America's Next Top Model. She also just like happened to be famous. There were some racial slurs thrown at this girl's family by Nikki and her mother. It was mostly Nikki's mother, but Nikki was there too. And that kind of put a halt in all the momentum that Nikki was gathering at the time. And now I think what we're seeing is like,
The direct fallout of that because she really she did go back to working as a hairstylist and but she is also this like weirdly famous person. And I don't think she knows how to do both. Yeah, it must be tough. It must be confusing. It's definitely confusing. And I think that's what we're seeing reflected in the content. Yeah, but I think she's living her truth.
I would say she's living her truth too. And if we don't see her in the next season of White Lotus, like that's such a brilliant point. She wasn't, she's a good actress. Like she did a good job as Tracy. Yeah. And she would be a good like character actress. And I think we need to give her. We just need her to play herself. We need to give her another shot. You think? Yeah. Like I just think we're not done with Nikki Blonsky yet. She's having this moment. And I know people say that about everyone. They need to be a next season. No, they don't shut up. Agreed. Nikki Blonsky does. Yeah.
We are also going to be recapping The White Lotus at the end of today's episode. It was quite an episode. Yeah, we'll be recapping the latest from Sodom and Gomorrah. What a sick fucking show. Yeah, no, and I think it gets worse, and I have a theory that I want to share, and I came up with it all on my own. Okay, yeah, we will be recapping that, but I was...
Seriously in shock Sick When I was watching I was seriously sick No and like the whole time I've had this huge pit For Thomas Ravenel Like is there a worse feeling Than knowing when you go Right When you're going to jail And your family Will be in financial ruin But I actually think That's not as bad as Saxon waking up Realizing like He had sex with his brother We'll save it for The I think I'd rather I think I'd rather go to jail I think I'd rather go to jail as well And you know That's my biggest fear Yeah I will have new fear unlocked
Blacking out and having sex with your brother. Well, Nikki Blonsky and the Disney, by the way, do you think Nikki Blonsky is a Disney adult? She kind of has the elk of a DA. She does have the elk.
I don't know. It might be hard for her. She probably at one point like went and VIP. Oh, it's so true. And now she's in GA and that's tough. That's why also I can never go VIP because I'll never be able to go back. It's so true. It's kind of like flying first class. Like once you do it once, like everything else is terrible. It's almost like a taste. It's too rich for her blood. And it's like if you can stand it, the economy or GA, like stay, stay.
That's actually, now I'm scared. Now I'm not going to ever do the VIP. When they were doing the press tour for Hairspray, they absolutely did a VIP trip to Disney. It's just like, Disney was definitely somehow involved in the project. Oh, and of course, like that one clip where Zac Efron went to rehab and they're like, have you spoken to Zac? She was like, I picked up the phone. And it's like,
Okay. So did I. She's actually not real. I'm sorry. Like a character setting needs to be done on her brain. She's so crazy. But like, and she doesn't even, that's why she's so great. She doesn't know she's being so entertaining by being such a freak. And then the hotel in West Virginia. Yeah.
If you haven't seen the clip of Nikki Bonski at the hotel in West Virginia, she's like being an influencer. Like she obviously got this room for free. So she's tagging the room. And it's just, it's like exactly what you would expect from a classic influencer showing the room, showing the room service throughout the trip. But it's an actual roadside hotel. Like, and she's like, look at this view. And you guys, she's being dead serious. It's an actual parking lot. It actually sounds like satire. Cause she's like, look at this view. Like, thank you, West Virginia. And it's a parking lot.
West Virginia, you've been amazing. It's satirical, 100%. You would think it's like an SNL skit about an influencer. But it's not satirical from her. It's earnest. She's dead serious. She got this obviously free hotel room. You guys, and she's like, look at this room service. And it like actually comes in a brown paper bag. She's so fucking funny. I'm sorry. You guys absolutely have to, that's of all the videos that have come out for me.
The West Virginia hotel room is the best one. No, but also it's not even like the content. Okay. So maybe you got your room service in a brown picket bag, but you take like a party pick and like, we don't know where it's her take on it. It's the aesthetics of her content. And she has like Vaseline on her lens the whole time. It's like so blurry. Like 100%. It is performance art. It is.
So funny. And then the cameos are just so crazy. Like she opens it up and it's like someone's like sister pass and she's like without love. No, no. She opens them all the same. Good morning Baltimore. It's Nikki Blonsky from Hairspray. Sorry about your sister. She introduces herself like her name is no longer Nikki Blonsky. It's Nikki Blonsky from Hairspray. She has to remind people. Nikki Blonsky nay turnblad.
Literally. Oh my God. It's nice to see everybody picking up and noticing things you and I have been noticing and talking about for years. Not to be so annoying. I know, but we've really been trying to sound the alarm here. We have. We're always talking about Mickey Lonsky. We're also always talking about Hairspray. And now would be a great time. I hope Hairspray streaming numbers are gone way up. Yeah, people need to educate themselves.
and put some respect on her name. She's so funny. Oh my God. I think I also need to watch that show huge. I think so too. But like, what if you fall in love with it and there's no more? I know. I don't think I will fall. Based on some of the clips that I saw, like, I don't think it's a show that you fall in love with.
I don't know. Nikki Blonsky. She's got that Blonsky charm. And do you know that guy Heartthrob Anderson? Heart Rob Anderson. Heartthrob. He does like that. He's like a social media guy. His username. His name is Rob Anderson. But I think his username is Heartthrob Anderson. He like watches old movies and recaps them. He's the one who made like that Julia Stiles. I know him. You know him. So he did a recap of Huge and it actually made it look so fucking funny. That's really funny.
So that's what I'll be doing this weekend. - Okey dokey. Uh oh, did I copy Selena Gomez? - Oh my God, wait, I had something I wanted to say about Selena Gomez. Oh, do we have a story about her? - No, but we could. I've got a slot. - No, no. No, I don't want to. - And I'm not afraid to fill it.
No, I just want to say, because now that I feel like we talked about it on the podcast, my phone heard me and I've been getting served like Hailey versus Selena content and like the lyrics from Selena's new album being pulled out of context. You're so embarrassing. Yeah, right. So there's like a lot of things like that. I just, I really want to remind people and I'm not taking any of it like seriously at all. She literally posted it herself. Selena is one of those...
artists who I feel like I don't study their lyrics because she's a collaborator, right? She's not known for her songwriting. Yeah, it's like, who does Julia Michaels find embarrassing? Correct. Who does Phineas find embarrassing? Because they tagged like a long list of songwriters and collaborators and partners. And so like people...
looking into it as if it's from Selena's diary. We need to take a step back. You can do that with Olivia Rodrigo. You can do it with Taylor Swift. You can do it with artists who you know really like. Gracie. Who you know are really writing from their own experience. Sometimes they're the sole songwriter on an album. Did you see that list of people, her and Benny tagged? There's a million songwriters. So people thinking this is like directly from her journal. I think we need to take a step back. That's like thinking Katy Perry, you know? She's like, she's known for other things as a pop star, not her songwriting. Katy Perry's also a songwriter.
Is she? Yeah. Yeah. That's like her voice. I don't know.
Oh, okay, fine. That was a bad example. But I understand what you're saying. And also like, say they, all these 30 people like did pull from Selena's own, say all these 30 people did pull from Selena's own experience and she's like telling them what she wants to sing about. So it's like 30 people in a room, like writing a diss track about Hailey Bieber is really embarrassing. So I want to believe, that's not what it is. I want to believe like the first one where it's just like someone wrote her song and she's singing it. But the fact that it's Benny, like didn't make me feel like it was more personal because of the relationship with Justin. Yeah.
No, because like they're billing it as their album. So they're really seeing someone else's thought, like story and words. Like, yes, that's sometimes it's weird to think about with certain artists that like, it's like this deep and they talk about the music like so personally when they really had no hand in writing it. Yeah. That's just kind of a weird part of the industry. And I feel like that's what's happening. And this is not meant to be shade at all. I think Selena as a pop star is known for like other things when like, I wouldn't say her songwriting is her leading attribute. Yeah, I agree with that.
So keep that in mind when you're like dissecting. We can be crazy investigators with Taylor Swift. Like we know that was in her notebook on the side of her nightstand. Like we know that. I don't think that's the case here. Understood. Good point. So that was what I wanted to say. Now are you ready for the Fast Five stories that you that do need to know?
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Thank you, your clorder. You're welcome, your norder. First story, the big news of the weekend. Jonas Conn took over the American Dream Mall with Jonas Brothers concerts, events, food, and more.
Yeah. So Jonas Conn. It took over my weekend too. Yeah. I could tell. I could tell you were affected by it. I didn't talk about my weekend in the pre-fast five banner because I literally did not one thing. I laid in bed the entire weekend. I went to the diner. I watched Friday Night Lights like I did nothing. But I consumed so much Jonas Conn content. So like I do feel like I was there. It's almost as if you were at Jonas. You were mentally you were at Jonas Conn.
Yeah, I was actually more so like analyzing Jonas Conn. I find the whole thing very confusing and I'm not coming at it as a hater. But the whole thing felt so off brand to me for the Jonas Brothers. It feels like something you would do just like a later stage in your career. Very like New Kids on the Block. How they have like a cruise. Yeah. So here's what happened. Jonas Conn, which was a celebration of all things Jonas.
20 years in the making, Camp Rock. They did it all. Pizza Girl, Sheena Shea was there. Took over the American Dream Mall on March 23rd with the Jonas Brothers, their brother Franklin. We know him as Frankie. I just want to say, it's kind of a banner year for Sheena Marie Shea, even though her show got canceled. The Jonas Brothers want her, Lady Gaga wants her. Don't worry about her. Oh, and she got plucked out of very few people from the old show to go to the new show. She set herself up for success. This didn't just happen to her. I just feel like she needs to get credit for laying the bricks.
Yeah, but I think the Ariana year, like the most previous year, was kind of a hard year. The jokes were like Sheena's. Oh, and do you know that she was on Masked Singer?
I did know that. That's what I'm saying. She's having a great year. Yeah. So All American Rejects and other acts playing multiple sets and Jonas themed activities, food and photo booths located throughout the mall. They also did a Chicks in the Office podcast taping. Jay Shetty was there. Oh, yeah. Big Time Rush performed. Big Rob, you know, from Burning Up. They really like they plucked the Camp Rock cast was there. Their entire life.
lore every joke they had the mall's best pizza stall turned into Jonas pizza for the day Mrs. Fields sold Jonas cookies and Yardhouse had shake by the ocean and around the clock all had Jonas themed menu items so as somebody who was virtually there you know in a virtual sense I could tell you it looked like an event that was really well done I think a lot of times yeah
A lot of times ever since Fyre Festival, like you are worried that like this big event being put on by celebrities is going to, you know, leave you in the middle of the Bahamas with a cheese sandwich. And it wasn't that. It was really well done. I saw like people complaining, like my VIP ticket. But for the most part, that's life. That's life. For the most part, like it looked like a safe event and a well-organized event. And sometimes VIP isn't about the view. I don't know if they build it, but sometimes it's just about like the privacy. No, and like just being away from like the mosh pit.
So it looked like it was really well run. It was organized. It was safe. It was really for the fans. And it wasn't like the Jonas Brothers showed up for three seconds. Like they were there all day, multiple. Oh my God. What music is playing? It's coming from, sorry, the volume on my iPad was on from this weekend. Oh man, I thought we were like about to be pranked or something. Claudia, I thought you were having fireworks outside of your studio. I'm like, do you not hear that? No, and you had like a late reaction. Because I was waiting for you. I thought it was coming from you. I'm like, she died.
That was really crazy. It's a Capital One commercial. Kind of a beautiful beat. What nerve. So kudos to the Jonas Brothers for not like, you know, alienating their fans in like a parking lot in New Jersey. Like it really was. It was really well done. I like that they like leaned into all of their lore. I just can't get past. I really feel like they got into like some sort of bad financial deal because this is something like you do once to make a ton of money.
Like the way people say like Bruno Mars is in gambling. Like I feel like Kevin, like somebody, not Kevin, it would never be Kevin. No. Like somebody within the group. I don't know. It just feels so incongruous with the level that they're at as celebrities. I just feel like did they even make that much money from this?
A lot of people were there and they did two sessions. Like they did it twice because so many people want to take it. It's like I saw a line through the parking lot, like thousands of people. More than you could play to at a stadium? I don't know. And they're playing MetLife Stadium, they just announced. So like, I don't know this. I need someone to explain to me like what, besides nourishing. I just feel like for the Jonas Brothers, there's easier ways to make money. Yeah. A big commercial deal. Because it was a lot. It was a long day for them. They weren't just doing. I don't.
I don't know what the strategy is here. Like maybe they want to enter that legacy phase of like new kids on the block where we're like, you know, a band for moms. And like, hey, we're always here for you. And like, that's kind of a nice place to be. It is, but it just doesn't feel like that's really where they're at naturally. They're releasing new music. They do big collaborations with relevant people. Like, but it does feel so random to me. Unless like the American dream.
paid them millions of dollars to do this? I was talking about it all weekend. So when I brought it up to Ben, he like didn't care. And he's like, maybe the mall, because it is like one of those billion dollar malls, maybe the mall paid them even more. Okay. So say the mall paid them $20 million. Divided by three after taxes. I'm sorry. To make a couple mil in a day. That's pretty good actually. Yeah.
I really, I found the whole thing so confusing and that's not to say it was a bad event. It actually looked really pargy. I agree. And if I'm like, if I'm a big fan, like a diehard fan and I get to go like, and they're playing into every joke, every movie they made, they're not shying away. I love that. But this is seriously just not something you do.
Not they're not at their peak. I would say like when they came back, they had like a year where they were really peaking. But they're still like an extremely relevant like they have hit songs and cool. They released new music constantly. Very cool. They announced all these projects. Joe's releasing a solo album. I'll like really never understand the solo. Yeah, I know. Stop. Yeah, just take your best songs. Yes. I'm on the group album and stop.
Agreed. I mean, but imagine having to split stuff three ways. Like that's tough. No, I already like lament over having to split shit with you. I know. But the thing for them that they need to know is like you make five times more when you're doing it as a job or a split of three ways. The math, math. One thousand percent. And like it being in New Jersey, like a homecoming, like I get I get the whole thing. Yeah. I just I have questions. I don't. I have questions. Yeah.
Yeah. So maybe someone who has insider track, if you work on like the marketing team and American dream, like just, or if you sound, if you work on like the Jonas brothers, like business management team, like, do they need the money? I don't think they need, I don't think they're in a desperate situation. I think this might've been like a huge payday and who would say no to that?
Or this is their way because they did cancel like a big part of their tour for some reason. Remember? Yeah. But maybe this is a way of like giving back to the fans. Giving back to the European fans by doing a Jonas Con in New Jersey. That's so sweet. Jackie, I'm genuinely looking for answers here. I understand. Because do you feel what I feel? Of course. Like the strangeness of this? Okay. Yeah. And they're like, it's like at a water park and they have their fans in bathing suits. Like, I don't know. The whole thing just is confusing. I heard there was a bathing suit component. Yeah. Because you know the American Dream Mall, like one of the big attractions. Where people ski.
Okay, so one of the big attractions there is when they have an indoor, that's where I learned to ski. If you guys remember, I vlogged it for Patreon. It's one of these insane malls. So they have an indoor ski mountain. They have an indoor water park and they had like a concert at the water park and everybody was like in their bathing suits. Like, I don't know. It just feels, it feels like something you do when you're over the hill and you want to still make money from your former glory days. Now, obviously this was on a much bigger scale. I don't think the New Kids on the Block cruise is as well executed as this.
I don't know. I really don't know. The more we learn, the more questions we have. Correct. Well, if you know anything, let us know. Please.
And if you went, how was it? I thought I heard overall it was like a very premium experience. Yes. Are you ready for our next story? Mm-hmm. As much as it pains me to say the good guys are making news. The good guys are making news. Their first episode. Jackie said she opened up TMZ today to like. It's the first story. Pillage for stories. It was the first story. It's the first story. I have to be honest. I listened to TMZ.
The episode while I was getting ready this morning, I thoroughly enjoyed myself. It was so crazy how Drake and Josh were able to just like snap back and be Drake and Josh again and how their chemistry, they remembered lines from the Amanda show. Tony Pajamas. Their dynamic is just so the same as it was. It was a really great episode so far. I don't even know if we talked about
Like once it wasn't. Oh, you did talk about once it was announced. I did briefly talk about it, but I didn't want to talk about it too much before people could watch it. Now you can watch it and listen to it. It's available everywhere. And it's actually really crazy. I feel like to Josh and Ben's credit, because there is this like big heavy thing they need to talk about, right? Like everything we learned in the documentary last year, like the show that brought everyone so much joy. Drake was going through like one of the worst times of his life and he was suffering abuse at the hands of somebody who was supposed to protect him. Yeah.
So it's hard to like navigate that conversation while also being nostalgic and funny and light. And I feel like the episode really it's two parts. So the second part comes out on Thursday. But I feel like they really covered both kind of because that's what people want to tune in for, like the fun Drake and Josh. But, you know, we just learned all of this from the documentary last year. We also need to unpack that a little bit. They're very open to with one another because they did have this like public fight.
Yeah. And people thought that like they had major beef. I don't think they had major beef, but they just hadn't spoken, you know? Yeah. And I think it's just like the longer things go without speaking, like the more miscommunication there is, the more inferences people make. And it just drives you apart, especially when like so much of your time together was during your formative years and everybody was like struggling with major issues. Yeah.
so it makes sense how they got to such a bad place um but I was watching listening to the episode and I really feel like and I know we're so anti-reboot like I know that we are and I feel this way but I feel like Drake and Josh like deserve like a movie buddy comedy because I was also realizing like I liked Drake and Josh like passively like you said on the show last week I don't remember you liking Drake like I liked it when it was on I watched and I enjoyed it but for someone like
like Ben, like it's his Hannah Montana. Like it shapes him as a person. Yes. And by the way, I've been reading comments all day from like YouTube and even Justin Bieber. Yes. Ben is like a part of a big generation of men whose Hannah Montana was Drake and Josh. So for me, like you want to bring Hannah back. I will. That's a good idea. Anytime, any place of all interested parties are on board in a real way. And I feel like
feel like there is actually the potential here to do like a movie we don't need a TV show like a movie like Drake and Josh adventure and it's like really well written and they get to like have their buddy comedy moment because Drake was saying that's what I always wanted like you know Johnny Carson and his guy and right Lucy and Desi Ethel yeah and like they
They found that in each other, but they couldn't even enjoy it because they were just both being so taken advantage of by the industry. And I feel like they deserve like one time to really enjoy it and do it right because it comes out of their pores. Like they get together and they're already like bada bing, bada boom. And so what Drake was saying, because you're right, and I completely agree, is Drake lives in Mexico and they were asking him about that. And he basically said like,
Drake and Josh was on in Mexico on the equivalent of like Fox 5 here. Basic cable. Every kid in Mexico. He says he is the most famous person. He has so many work opportunities in Mexico, more so than he would ever have in America or L.A. And so when you think of the impact just even outside of the states of the show, it's actually really crazy. I never thought about it. Like did people in other countries watch Hannah Montana? Yeah.
I think so. Okay. Yeah. It's just everyone has like their show from their time, but like Drake and Josh is just as big as Hannah Montana. And when you think about like that show, it's,
a part of who I am it's in my DNA and that's how Drake and Josh is for other people and I just feel like there's more here because it ended you know before its time and while they couldn't even enjoy it imagine the kind of comedy they could be making if they like were on good terms and I just feel like it with the right writers and producers and like something high budget like this would kill
And the crazy thing is, is that it's a show titled off of both of their real names. Because I'm sure they would never want to work with Nickelodeon or Paramount. And they shouldn't. Like, it was such a traumatic, terrible... But technically, like, the intellectual property of the show belongs to Paramount. But it's their real names. So, like, you literally could just go... Like, you don't need... Maybe it could be Josh and Drake. Or maybe they'll work with Paramount. Like, maybe it's all new people. And maybe they would do right by them. I don't know. I mean, it's a good way...
to undo some of like the PR damage that that documentary did. Yeah. I just feel like there's still this need for it. And what was so funny was the story about Justin Bieber, how Drake was like beefing with believers on Twitter and like just talking trash to them and like inadvertently to Justin. And then like Justin saw all of it. And then Scooter saw him at a club and was like, is that really you on Twitter? He's like, you guys are seeing that. He's like, yeah, man. Like Justin, he was like, Justin loves Drake and Josh. Like he's so bummed out. No,
No, Justin is like literally the target demo. He like he was he was a Ben. And imagine like Drake is like talking shit about you and your fans. And the thing is now I think like, you know, hindsight, of course, is 2020. Like I think there was a couple of years where Drake was like having sort of like a public image issue. He was acting really strangely on social media and in real life. And now we know like why that was. He was like truly spiraling in like a
In a real way, not just online. So I think all is forgiven probably from Justin Bieber. Yeah, yeah, I would hope so. Especially because like the way he describes it, like he didn't mean anything by it. He didn't realize that like he would ever see it, which I feel like in the early days of Twitter, like, yeah, you don't realize you're just like fucking around and that totally reaching so many people. So it's been really good so far. I think I have like 10 minutes left and then part two comes out later this week. So it's just.
Been a treat. Good on the good guys. I did listen to their intro and everything and their new song, which is really amazing. And they played it twice because then Drake wanted to hear it.
And like right at the beginning and the guy who worked on it with Josh worked on Drake's album. And Drake was like, do people say like your song sounds just like my second album? And I believe that the part, the guy who Josh worked on the, Josh wrote the good guys theme song, but then when it came time to like have it produced and made. Yeah. I believe he also did the Drake and Josh theme song. Right.
So Drake Bell's like, yes, because he's a singer. Yes. Yes. And just like the fact that Ben is a part of all this is not lost. I mean, I saw Ben getting a lot of hate for not being there in person.
And I just want to say to my husband's credit, he literally had a flight and it was the week. Remember, I was sick on that Friday and Ben filled in for me. I was so sick. He was so sick. Like, no, he's not leaving. And by the way, as a podcast listener, which I am when I listen to stuff these days, like it really doesn't affect me. The podcast listeners are so chill. You know, it's the video community that have like a lot of high maintenance needs that are up your button around the corner. Get rid of the frames. Get rid of the. No, we love you guys. But the people listening as a podcast, like they are so chill.
It's so true. You know what? I should have asked for an advanced copy of this podcast because when Zach and I were driving back from Disney yesterday, he like wanted to listen to a podcast, but like everything I was suggesting, he was like, no. So I was like, okay. Oh, you really should have just asked. I didn't even think of it. He would have loved that. He would love that. You would love it. So good on the good guys. Happy for them. I guess. Feather in TNN's cap. Like it is still about us. It's true. They make us look good. We invented them.
It's so true. You know, like we literally copy everything they do now these days, like with their theme song and their little intro video. They could have had a podcast about TNN and they'd say, okay. So true. But no, we invented them, okay? Yeah. Don't forget it. Our next story is a twofer because the Paul brothers are making news. What's the other one doing? I know Jake got engaged. Jake got engaged and
And they have a reality show on Max that's dropping this week. It's called Paul American. And they're all in it. And it sounds amazing. Oh, that's a cute name. Yeah. So they are now doing press for Paul American. They talk to TMZ Sports about the show. They're peeling back the curtain of their family in a new reality TV show. And they're telling viewers that people will see them in a way that they've never shown the world until now.
Well, I saw that the younger one got engaged. I actually recently started following his fiance on social media because I was really surprised to find out she's not like what you would think Jake Paul's. She's an Olympian. Deeply accomplished speed skater, right? Mm-hmm. Jada Leardom. She's international. She's far enough. I don't know where she's – I think she skis for like the Netherlands or something. But he like flies around the world and like comes to her competitions. It's just like not what you would have expected from Jake Paul. Yeah.
And I actually really like her content. I followed her the other day because I saw this video she posted on a PJ. And then they find out that this weekend they got engaged. Not to make everything about me, but the timing was kind of weird. No, I know. But maybe they were getting high engagement, so they were served two more because they were obviously so happy in their relationship. You know I love the Paul brothers, and I'm going to be watching this show because everything I've watched of theirs, the one thing...
They're not what you think. What was that series called?
Oh, no, that's their podcast. Untold. Untold Jake Paul, yes. Was so good. They're not what you think. And now they're like living very traditional lives. Like Logan just had a baby with Nina Agdal. You all know her. That's what's shocking. And so you would think like Jake Paul got engaged. But no, Logan like really settled down a little while ago. And it's like they're oddly traditional. Yeah. And they work really hard and they're having a lot of success. And I think it will be like a great show because they're just huge kids.
personalities and their worlds are very interesting so well i'm curious to see like their lifestyle like at home because they know they live in puerto rico that's like a business decision they made to avoid paying taxes and let me just say i respect it heavily i'm definitely some something i'd be interested in doing one day um and they lead these like very extravagant lives i know people like locals like hate them like taking advantage of like the tax system um
But that's something I definitely find interesting. Yeah. And I also, the Paul brothers always remind me of Tommy Fury because that's how I was introduced to him. And I also need to mention like Tommy, Bambi and Molly were all on vacation in Dubai this weekend. They actually extended their trip. They didn't post together, but like they are, they didn't like, they all posted. Did you see the paparazzi pictures of them landing at the airport? No, I didn't. Was it lovely? Okay, something really bothered me about it. Wait, hold on. Okay, let me tell you. Yeah, pull it up. Okay. And tell me if you'll notice. Molly May.
Is that a good search? Yeah. Yeah. It's her, Bambi and him like leaving the airport with the stroller and the suitcases and stuff. Okay. They were classic pop paparazzi pick. Let me know what is wrong with this image. Okay. There's a lot of images. So I'm just looking. Yeah. You'll see it in all of them. I'll see it in all of them.
she's pushing a stroller and a luggage and he's only pushing one luggage and he has a free hand. Correct. They have two big luggages, two checked luggages and a stroller. She has one stroller, one luggage. He has one luggage. What the fuck are you doing, bitch? Take both suitcases. Oh, and there's like
And there's like a security guard not helping at all. No, the security guard is pulling one. And then in this picture, Tommy's pulling three. And Molly's pulling one. Unacceptable. Why do they have so much luggage? Unacceptable. When you're pushing the stroller, like that's it. Especially when you have a husband and like professional security. No, and not just a husband, but a husband whose job it is to pull weights. And with these sorts of luggages where the wheels are 360, you can put the...
The handles like this and then just push them at once. It's very easy. I was very upset. And when I opened the comments, I saw other people being like, why is she carrying a suitcase? And I was so glad I wasn't the only person having this thought because it would bother me so much. Yeah, it's hard. You could see she's struggling. Um,
But I'm going to focus on the positive, which is that they're clearly back together. I am so happy for them. I'm happy for her because I know that's what she wants. I'm happy for Bambi because this is what's best for Bambi. And Tommy like keeps alluding to the fact that he's like healthier than ever and happier than ever. And I think he said he didn't cheat. He didn't cheat, but he was a bad partner. Okay. So that's something you can work on. Because he was abusing alcohol and out all night and you can hear from just not being. But.
like obviously not bad enough for her to stop loving him and wanting to be with him. So I'm glad that they can now be in the best relationship possible. Complete agreement. And Amazon better have been there with them cameras. I want the rekindling recorded televised. And Tommy looks good. He looks well. Strong. Yeah. Yeah. Not strong enough to carry three suitcases. But of course. Yeah. So Mazel Tov to them. Congrats. Are you ready for our next story?
Four? Number four, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Amy Schumer shares that she's back on weight loss drugs after having a horrible experience with Wagovi. Can I tell you that video she posted made me chuckle hard. No, same. She was just posting, it was just like a random video and she was sharing it because the company that prescribed her the medication is a company she's invested in. So it was obviously like, she was sharing a lot in this video and she wasn't intending to be so funny. She made me laugh. Well, she's just a funny lady. But yeah, she had like a couple things.
couple things that she wanted to say. She obviously like wanted to post a video to talk about her positive experience with this company that was so positive that now she's invested in it. So it behooves her to talk positively about it to her millions of followers. Why she decided to do that while she's driving in the car. I mean, she could have, you know, been sad in front of her ring light and, you
She does have the craziest social media, let me tell you. It is so poorly managed and not a shade at all. Like, it's clearly run by her. So she'll, like, take a screenshot of something and it's like there's a picture of her on the side. It's just not, like, a pargy influencer. So it's very on brand for her to, like, make this chaotic video. But I actually thought she was going to crash. No, I know. And people love that about her and I think it's really great. And I actually wasn't worried about the driving aspect because it's not like she was looking at the phone and she's probably...
probably a good driver and she can drive and talk at the same time you know it was just like why are you gonna do this big endorsement for your new investment like as a half-assed remark while you're in traffic I don't know I have no idea what she said was years ago and she said this before she went on Wagovi she was horribly nauseous because she has that thing that Kate Middleton thing of horrible nausea during pregnancy and apparently transferred to like when she was on these drugs and she was so sick she couldn't stay on it which I think she was bummed about and
And I think the anti-Ozempic movement, they love to reference, well, even Amy Schumer. Like she's been open about the fact that it ruined her life. Like I think they cite that often as like a reason why people shouldn't take it, even though she's clearly the exception. What's the name of that thing?
The Kate Middleton nausea. Oh, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Because literally like three people have it. The two of them are them. And so you like can't use them as... Examples. High premises gravidarum. Yeah, HG is what they call it. Right. So she has...
talked about how one time she used the drugs, it did not work for her. And then she never used it again. So that's kind of the end of that story until she shared, she's actually been on Manjaro recently. She got like a new prescription. I know the drugs, everybody's like, they're all the same. They're actually really different. And you can have a terrible experience on one and an amazing experience on the other. And she's having a really like pleasant experience on Manjaro. I think it's doing what it's supposed to be doing without making her terribly sick. And so she wanted to share that, which I love when people share stories.
positive ozempic experiences because it never gets shared so I love that for her and I'm excited for her all thanks to midi health which also diagnosed her as perimenopausal interesting she's being so funny like I'm sorry she was saying like that um
She basically was saying that these drugs can be really expensive unless you're diabetic or medically obese, which the Internet does think that I am like she was being really funny while also talking like very relatably about something very real. And to me, this is like the number one way to get into my heart while also like making a bit of money.
Correct. Invest. We love to see a woman in business. Yeah, but someone like Amy Schumer at this point can't go on Wiggo via Mojaro's epic and not tell us at this point just because we're all very invested and she keeps it so real. Yeah. And of course, she feels the same. She's like, of course, I would tell you. I do think there was a time where talking about your being on one of these drugs was extremely brave. Yeah. I think now it's kind of been detonated. Is that the right word? Diffused? Yeah.
Yeah, kind of. It's not so much of like a triggering hot topic anymore. Yeah, but people still are lying. Oh, yeah. People are still lying about it. I saw someone like someone's like getting called out like you're totally on it. And it's like, yeah, she probably is. I'm going to text you because. Oh, I know who. Yeah. Do we talk about this person already on the show briefly? No. Oh, okay.
I'll just text you. But why text me who you think? And I'm just like, I'm sure you guys can figure it out. But it's just like she's deciding not to say. But of course she's not. And I feel like any celebrity who's like always been overweight and is now not like they're probably on it. Except, except, and I want to talk about because I've been seeing a lot of people talking about this. Lizzo.
Lizzo, you don't think she's on it? I actually now, I don't. I think so much time has passed that she's started her weight loss journey that if you were on the drug for that long, you really would have lost like probably more significant weight. How much time? When did she get canceled? Was that two years ago? No. Maybe a year. When was it? Let's search Lizzo Banana. That'll do it. Lizzo Banana controversy. The lawsuit. They're not giving me time, Gemini. Okay.
Here, NBC News. This is from August 1st, 2023. So it's a year and a half. Okay, I think that if you were consistently using one of these drugs while also changing your lifestyle, which you can see on social media, she works out a lot. She's eating very differently. I think she would look much different.
I think it's happening, like, very slowly for her. She looks amazing. And, you know, I was very critical of her when she dressed up as Zip for... I do not think she's on it now. I really don't. And, like, why not? I don't know. Some people, like, have, like, I think moral...
issues with it so that's i think some people some people are like anti uh unnecessary drug right it is like an injection so it's not like an ad that you pop yeah so if you're like a natural swirling it doesn't work and it makes them sick right right right people have their reasons i'm not against anybody who doesn't want to be on it i could could never be me you can't relate
Can't relate. I'm so excited to get back on it. And guys, like God, you know, when I bounce back like skinnier than ever, like don't start rumors about me. I'm on it. Okay. You don't even need to ask. I'm not gonna do a big patron reveal. I'm on it. I can't wait to see how it feels one day. It's gonna be like that Lisa Frank meme. You have to tell me like when the day comes, I will fly down. I want to be on site for the first injection. Watch, I'm gonna get nauseous.
Yeah, you have hyperpigmentasia. I don't have HG, but I am nauseous swirly. Watch. What was the story here? Amy Schumer. Oh, Amy Schumer. We didn't go very far. No, we didn't. Like, we're still on track. We're just talking about a Zempic, which we always are. Are you ready for our fifth and final story? If it's our fifth and final story, that's brought to you by Booking.com. Booking. Yeah. Yeah, it is.
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On booking.com. Booking.ya. Can I get a booking.com, booking.ya from you, Jax? Booking.com, booking.ya. You did too much there. Booking.com. That's so rude. That is really, really rude that I tried my best. Yeah. Today's episode is also sponsored by the ASPCA Pet Health Insurance Program.
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Thank you, Tert-surance. You're welcome, Jert-surance. Our final story is some new couple news that is taking multiple worlds by storm.
Okay. Tiger Woods confirms that he is in a relationship with Vanessa Trump, who is the ex-wife of Donald Trump Jr. I thought it was going to be Jennifer Aniston out with Pedro Pascal. Yeah. Yeah. I'll tell you. They had like a three hour dinner. Yeah, I saw that. I'm texting you. What? She's texting me drama? Major. Got it. Okay. I thought that this whole time, I thought he was gay.
Tiger Woods? No, he loves the ladies. Isn't that his whole thing? He can't stop like driving in- No, Tiger Woods. Oh, Pedro Pascal. Pedro. So I was just like shocked to see Jennifer Aniston. And good to know she's not dating Barack Obama. That conspiracy theory, I guess, is debunked? I don't think so. Just because you go to dinner with someone for three hours, they might be like working on a new movie. It doesn't mean that he's not gay. It's not like they're like seeing- Maybe he's friends with Barack. Yeah, maybe like Barack went out the back door and it was like a double date. Yeah.
Right. Barack went out the back door for sure. Yeah. They had dinner for three hours. Could mean so many things. Yeah. So I wouldn't say like new couple news, but just, I guess. No, no. That's just where my mind went because I saw a picture this morning. But yes, not only are these two dating, which I think.
came out a few days ago the real news is the incredibly bizarre instagram post and caption that tiger wood shared announcing his new relationship whilst also asking for privacy yeah so but a few days before that like it was like came out in the press that they were dating but not confirmed by either one of them so then he confirmed it he said love is in the air and life is better with you by my side we look forward to our journey together through life together at this time we would appreciate privacy to all those close to our hearts
Okay, so why did you announce it? I think to confirm it and people were talking about it. So it's like, yes, we're together. Please give us privacy. Okay.
I just feel like they're too famous to have to even acknowledge a rumor. Like he, in their own universes, like he is the most famous athlete of all time. Like I would say he's up there with like Michael Jordan, right? Yeah. Michael Jordan's not out here confirming rumors. Like, I don't know. It's just kind of like lowbrow behavior. Yeah, I agree. But this is like huge for the golf world. Of course, like Tiger Woods is Tiger Woods. Well, it makes sense. I could see how they would have met. Like this doesn't feel so random. And then her old,
oldest daughter, Kai, is like a professional golfer. So imagine then like your stepdad is Tiger Woods. Oh, wait, that's kind of crazy. You know what I was also thinking, not to bring it back to Drake and Josh, that was the original blended. Drake and Josh walked so Drew and Adam could run. And so now Vanessa and Tiger can sprint together.
- Correct, right to the altar. - I actually, what I like about this story a lot is that like she has five kids and I feel like sometimes, you know, the woman you write them off like Don Jr. has had a long-term girlfriend since, he's in another relationship.
woman and the mom like it's left behind it's like oh hell no she's with Tiger Woods like Mike I had the same thought I like this for her because I feel like you know he's a bit of a philanderer her ex-husband he's always you know out and about different women and she's just kind of like you know the lowly ex-wife at home and she definitely is stunting on these hoes with her new man who's like so rich and
So famous, so talented. And you just know that daughter who golfs is like, I don't want to be spending all the time at mom's house now. Yeah. And I think Don Jr. Probably golfs. This is probably like his hero. 1000%. I just think it's great for women. Yeah.
actually agree with you it reminds me of Giselle like having a baby now after Tom kind of it's a yes yes in a totally different way it was a win for women in the bucket of just like female empowerment like things women can do when you thought you left them behind and just kind of turning that stereotype on its head of like the OG wife getting left behind for the younger woman right right
five kids and a tiger it's a good way of looking at it yeah so mazel tov to the happy couple truly and we will respect your privacy of course just just like you asked just after this story now correct privacy starts consider it private yep our lips lock the throw away lock them up and throw away the key are you ready for white lotus recap
As much as one can be ready to talk about something so disgusting. Let me tell you, I thought that initial incest scene was like the end of it. Right. And did I miss something or they set us up that way? No, they set it up that way because we're just seeing it from two people's POV. So I think and that's what made it so much more shocking. The first incest scene is how Saxon Patrick Schwarzenegger remembers it.
And it actually turns out that the brother, so the Saxon is the younger brother. Sorry. What's the Lachlan? Lachlan is the older. No, Claudia. Yes. You're wrong. You're wrong. Don't waste your time. Lachlan is the younger brother. You're a hundred percent right. Lachlan White Lotus. Oh yeah. Okay. Wait, maybe I'm wrong.
I just want to get this right. Oh, you're right. Okay, so Lachlan is the younger one. Wow, I need to rejigger my brain. I've been calling the younger one Saxon the whole time. So the first incest scene is the POV of Patrick Schwarzenegger. He thinks...
that his brother was having sex next to him. And he was jerking himself off. And he started jerking off because there's like porn happening next to him and he feels sick with himself for even doing that. You know, like that's his brother. When I saw that, I was like, oh my God, that is sickening. That is so twisted. By the way, it's inexcusable, but obviously the second one, like what actually happens, makes it seem like not so bad because as it turns out, that's actually not what happened. He didn't just jerk off.
He was jerked off in his sleep. He's just... Patrick Schwarzenegger is just sleeping there. Really? That's how I perceived it. Me and Ben. While his brother's getting fucked. And then he wakes up and there's like a masturbation occurring. I think he thinks that like it's himself. He's on drugs too. Oh, I didn't get a sense that he was sleeping. I got a sense that they were all on drugs. Like they're all caught up there having a threesome. He's also...
Saxon is also hooking up with the girl, but at the time that the girl is hooking up with Lachlan, Lachlan is jerking off his brother. So I perceived it that the older brother had sex with the girl.
And went to sleep. And the girl had sex with the younger brother. And then the younger brother also got the older brother involved while he was sleeping post-coitus. I seriously feel so nauseated. I know. And it's like the way Saxon is feeling and reacting the next day, especially as he discovers like more and more bad things. It's like, it's so real. Like how do you wipe this from your mind? Like I don't even know. I seriously have the biggest pit for him. And worse than for Thomas Rabineau. Of course. Spacing like ruin and destitution. Of course.
Lachlan, this little pervert, is so like unaffected by it. And... Well, he doesn't remember it. And my thought was that he was lying about not remembering it because he's just like a true fucking freak. But it turns out he doesn't remember it. And then when he does meditate at that place and remember it, he's not as horrified as he should be, but he's shocked. I think he's shocked. And he's probably like,
I don't know. He was looking at the tushy in the first episode. Things I did that. Yeah. So now it's like. He also was the one to lean in and kiss the brother first. Yes. And like make the kiss go longer. But he was also drunken on drugs. It's quite brilliant because we like hated the older brother the entire time. And very slowly they started to show us like actually the freak here.
Is the younger brother. He was staring at the tissue. He made the kiss go longer. He started jerking off his brother like he's a freak. And now he's spending the night with Piper at that place. So I just don't even want to know. I feel like he's going to fuck Piper. Oh, my God. And my theory is that Piper finds the gun.
And Piper kills her whole family because everyone is more sick than the next. You know, she hates her older brother. Then the one brother she liked is going to try and I think like, like have sex with her. That's what I think. Then he's going to find out about the dad. And then maybe he spares the mom because she is kind of innocent and all this. But she's she created these monsters. Like, I think because the family is so twisted. Like, I think it has to be them who who start killing people. I don't think Piper is a killer.
Well, that, but then I think I could see that being like the white lotus flip. It's like, look, she was trying to reach serenity, but the evil rich family got to her first. Like I could see that. When she was talking to the monk, like it's clear that she was having existential issues when she came here. Yeah.
But I don't think enough to kill. Like, she hates her older brother. She's not going to kill him. That's why she's running off to Thailand to get away from all of this. No, I could really see. I could see it being the mother more, finding out about everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She kills the husband. She kills herself. She's so funny. Yeah, she really is. You can't live in China. She's seriously funny. She said, at this point in my life, I don't think I could live an uncomfortable life. Facts. Facts.
I actually can't with this family anymore. Like they make me sick. They make me sick with a pit. Like the dread I feel for them. And it's like they can never go back home. No. So I hate that family. I hate the Bangkok storyline. Like I find it's – I don't give a fuck. I think we all are with you on that. So really the only joy I can feel is those three girls. And they actually are – it's really written quite perfectly. It's very, I think –
Not that I have friends like this, but you know, like there are female friendships that are just like this. And Carrie Coon having a fucking breakdown on last night's episode. Like I'm not mad. I'm not mad. She's so crazy. And like, she's not wrong. Right. Her friend did push Valentin on her and then slept with Valentin and you're in a relationship. And why were you pushing him? So she's so valid. But like I'm with Leslie Bibb, like we're on a trip, like must you ruin it? And then get so crazy and drunk. Like I actually, in the context of the argument, like,
she's right like Michelle Monaghan's a bitch but in the context of the trip like I'm with Leslie Bibb like can we just chill and not her throwing Leslie Bibb under the bus yeah no I agree like Michelle Monaghan is wrong and clearly that's something that she's done throughout her life and then they're reunited after so many years and all the stuff of like high school goes you forget like you right it doesn't matter washes away but then to like do the same thing that you've always done some people never change it brings up old issues and then you're just as mad and it's years worth of anger coming out but the fact that she can't
Compartmentalize and just enjoy the trip and like just know like this is her friend and her friend is like this and she's a man eater and she's a bitch and she's going to take what you have and what she's telling you to take. Just know that. No, and it's like you're now 40 and you've been friends since high school and it's like either accept people for who they are or don't be friends with them anymore. That's valid too. Yeah, and not as like supposing to feel bad for Michelle Monaghan when she's like, everyone talks about me. I didn't expect people closest to me. It's like if these are the people closest to you, you've got a problem.
You're screwed. No, I don't feel bad for any of them. The only one who I feel like a kinship to is Leslie Bibb. And I really started to like her last week when they were all partying and she's like, to what end? Like we're married old ladies. Can we go home? And they wouldn't leave the villa and like they were making her take the shot. So it's like, she's down to fun and have clown around and have fun. But like these two are taking it so far in different ways. And I actually felt like
in this episode it was the first time any one of them wasn't like saying something to one friend and a different thing to another like what she was saying to Carrie whatever her character's name is is the same thing that she was like the same energy she was sharing with Michelle she wasn't like talking shit with Carrie and then being like oh yeah she's crazy with like no now everything is officially out in the open which it has not been at all yeah
Belinda and porn chai getting it on and then her husband, I mean her son coming like seriously cringe. I don't know like to what end, like how that plays into any of this, like objection relevance. Yeah. And when guy talk. Belinda needs to become a bit more stealth. Like the fact that she doesn't say to the manager, what's his name?
I don't know his name. That she's like, oh, you know what? I was mistaken. Like she clearly sees this person is like not going to have like take her side. And people think that he's going to run and tell Greg anyway. So it's like she should have just downplayed it when she saw Greg. She should have acted like everything was normal and also been like, you know what? I was totally mixed up. Like I actually remember like, you know what I mean? She's not a good actress. She's not a good actress. Like in life, she's just not like.
Oh, I don't mean the actress herself. I mean like the character. She needs to be acting more. She's showing all her cards. Yeah. She's so like volatile. She's going to get herself killed. A thousand percent. A hundred percent. Like Bangkok.
Whatever. There's someone I read a theory that because, you know, Rick sees her husband and then the episode ends and it's like her husband is his father. Yeah, I think so. Something like that. But like, how can you? I don't care. Is it going to be him with a gray wig? How could it be so clear? No, I literally don't give a fuck. Unless they're able to tie it to the whole thing somehow. Yeah.
Right. Yeah. At some point, all these storylines get closer together. I don't have a theory as to how any of these random things are connected. And there's the dinner party next week.
at the dinner party at craig's house saxon though saxon should pack his bags and leave he should never see those two girls again because they're a constant reminder of this heart the fact that he wakes up the next day and goes to the pool to hang out with them like no nuts you hide your head in shame and you never like you don't go and like then recap yep when guy talk got his gun back like i actually was so relieved like he gives me he is also like a walking pit he because he's stupid
do bid as fuck. Like if he's in charge of the safety of this facility, it's no wonder there's going to be another shooting. Yeah.
And the girl, Chelsea, Rick's girlfriend, I actually really like her. She's like a good, she didn't like contribute much. She's not a part of the threesome or anything, but she's like a good supplemental character. Like when her reaction, when she's hearing about your brother jerked you off, so funny. She's a great actress. As much as there can be a moral compass on the show, I think that she is that. Supposed to be some sort of. Yeah. I like the, when the two girlies are together and,
And I feel bad for the other girly that, you know, she's in the dog house, but she acted crazy. Yeah, I don't feel bad for her. She's nuts. I know, but I like her. I can't like her. She was participated in the incest. I know. I can't like her. I don't know. She's funny.
And I know, and it's a good strategy. I know that like these types of shows are always like one-upping each other with like shock factor, right? Because what's everyone talking about today? The incest. And incest is a really crazy line to cross. I'm not going to lie. And I found myself watching it and like, not to be judgmental, but I was like, this is fucking gross. I kind of hate that like this is, because there's so many TV shows now, everyone's always trying to like outdo one another with like the crazy, and it's always like sex related and
I don't know. Did we really have to go there? Not to pose like a psychological, sociological question on the community today, but like, did we really have to go there? No, I don't feel that we did. And I feel like if you had Nikki Blonsky on your show, you wouldn't have to like sink to such depths because she could carry it. Because if you have to have an incestual storyline in order for, and in a modern day setting, right? Because we keep comparing it to Game of Thrones, whereas like incest was perceived differently. If you have to like have an actual sex scene of incest, like to get people talking,
Maybe we need to try new writers, you know? And also to say, last night's episode was actually very good. Like, me and Ben were talking about it a lot. Like, we have a lot to... It wasn't a bad episode, but it's like, at what cost? Seriously, I feel sick. No, it's thought-provoking because they're, like, throwing the craziest shit against... But if that's what you have to do, it's like...
There's not another way. And let me tell you, Ben had a totally different takeaway from the episode. He loved hearing from the Buddhist leader, the monk. Oh, actually, I liked it too. I didn't like love it, but I appreciated it. No, he said that's so wise. You know, Ben is obsessed with like Asian cultures and spirituality, central. And we went to bed afterwards and like I literally flipped over. It must have been like an hour into my sleep and he's on his phone. I'm like, what are you doing?
He's like, I'm just reading about all the monotheistic religions. He's like, and then I was like, what are you reading about? He's like, I'm on Kabbalah now. Uh-oh. He's seriously so scary. Yeah, he is. Reading about Kabbalah. He's Piper. He is Piper. And you are Victoria. Herpose. Yeah, that's Victoria. You could have given me all day to guess her name. Never would have come up with Victoria. I only knew it because she went, oh, I remember when she went up to the monks. I'm Victoria Ratliff. Got it.
Never would have guessed. The Ratlips is also their name. That's our show. That's White Lotus. That's the Fast Five. That's the Good Guys, unfortunately. And that's my favorite Disney adult doing her thing. And that's my favorite turdney adult. I am a turdney adult. You should open up a park called Turdney. Yeah. It'd be really popular. Thank you guys so much for listening to the Tesla Monday Morning Show. We tell the Fast Five stories you need to know every Monday, Friday, and YouTube. So if you're watching us on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up. We are...
Excuse me. Also available as a podcast. We are. Podcasts can be found. We are. That's Spotify. Oh, in case anyone wants to know like what's happening to me this week with my pregnancy symptoms is I have developed carpal tunnel. And apparently that's extremely common. It's from swelling. So are you going to take a break from your devices? It doesn't even like it's it just happens not even with my devices. It will be worse if you're on your phone a lot. Actually, like that's how you can make it worse. It's both hands. That's how you can make it worse. Do you want to get better or do you want to get worse?
Well, if I'm not on my phone, I'll just be worse in general. So it's like it all shakes out. It all comes down to the wash. I don't know. Physical pain or mental pain? Leave a five-star review about how beautiful, stunning, and wickedly talented we are. Is that the end of it? That's the end. I was like in the middle. I know. We went a little sideways. But we do love you. And we are saying bye. Love you. Bye.