Hour 1: Reacting To Mack Brown's Firing And Weight Loss (feat. Steve Hely)
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This is the Dan Levitar Show with the Stugatz Podcast. Today's episode is sponsored by DraftKings. Stay tuned because you'll hear more about DraftKings and all it has to offer throughout the show. DraftKings, the crown is yours.

I would urge the audience here on this day of magnificent self-promotion beyond making Stugatz's personal record book even more a success than it already is. The Greg Cody Show featuring Greg Cody is a podcast that is climbing high on the list of podcasts in sports because it's a relationship show where Chris is too hard on his old man and his old man is lovable beyond all reason. Greg Cody, go outside and

and reward yourself with a sponsored drum solo we're about to do with you. You are the winner of today's victory lap. Wow. Brought to you by Peloton. You get to go into the other room and tell us how right you were about something and exercise your right to be right.

Great. So get to the victory lap room. There you go. Greg's prize is exercising. Exercising and a drum solo. The floor is his on something that he was right about. He gets to do a victory lap and gets the entire show. It's a giant platform, Stugatz. So much as you've used it to get a bestseller today, he gets a drum solo on a giant platform where he gets to tell the world how right he was.

And he gets to use the Peloton app, which is great. Oh, God, I wish. If I could get punished and have to go out there and instead of the penalty box, I get to do a five-minute core class every day, a dream. I'd misbehave. I'm all for you doing takes while doing a five-minute core class if you wish to do that. I tried one time when I was doing Guillermo Tan to do a...

What is it like on Twitter live or whatever? What's it called? Twitter spaces or something like that. I tried to do one of those on one of my like initial Guillermo tons where I was like talking to like everybody that joined and was doing the class. I'm like, Hey, join Twitter spaces. We'll just talk through this class together. Right.

I don't know how the trainers do it on Peloton, to be honest. It's very hard to talk while you're doing it. Thankfully, and this is going to sound weird, thankfully I had someone bail me out and join the Twitter spaces and just have a conversation with me. Granted, it was a selfish move on his part because it benefited him, but it was Mark Feldman. So me and Mark Feldman hosted a podcast

Peloton ride together one time because I couldn't talk while I was doing exercise. So no thank you on the whole host of class. Feldman in sales. Is he another one of these Feldman in sales people who wants to be on air and wants to be a star, wants to get in the middle? Unknown, but I could see him. Yeah. He seems to be that kind of guy. Yeah. Once he gets the taste. Right. Yeah. Got all the accounts. I mean, it's all himself. Bit of a ham. Reminds me a lot of Stugatz.

That's not a compliment. The sales stugats from another time. Is Greg Cody in position back there? Before we get to Greg Cody's victory lap, though, I want him to work up a lather. I keep telling him it's funny because you're winded. He's already doing it, and I don't know how much longer we have. All right. Just cows chasing. In general, you're saying? Before we get to the last moments of Greg Cody's life, let's play the useless sound montage.

And get him into position here because I need him a little bit winded, a little bit tired when we go out to his victory lap sponsored by Peloton. Useless sound montage, please. All right. I thought we were going to another bit, so we are just – all right. And here it is, the useless sound montage. There it is. There it is.

I love my brother, and I'd lay down my life for my brother, but I would not let him win a football game. Once those guys cross the white lines, there's nothing I can do for them. There's nothing any coach can do for them once they cross the white line. It was a hard-fought game. They made more plays over the course of 60 minutes than we did. I wear sweatpants every day. One play at a time. One play at a time, and that is so important, and we exemplified that. That it's one play at a time. We stick together, we fight for each other, and we found a way. You know, current Vegas, they came out...

and had some fire about them, but they lost. Had to overcome a lot in all three phases. You know, it was a back-and-forth game. That's what these games are on the road in the division. That's a really good football team, and I thought that our guys did a good job of not flinching and keeping the blinders out. I haven't done a 23 in me, but I don't know. Had a good week of practice, you know, did a lot of work, and obviously it didn't show, so no excuses. He set us back and kind of put us behind the eight ball and

You can't do that in this league. I thought he played his tail off, man. He throws a really good football. You know, it's funny. I think Texas Tech was the first one to offer him when he was in eighth grade. We fought all the way to the end, and that's definitely encouraging. You don't want to be around people that are quitting. Defense, special teams, everybody. We had our moments of adversity, and we were able to come through when it mattered. So it was a complete team win, very resilient from our guys, but you just never lost that edge. We never lost the faith on the sideline and always kind of

you know, figured we were going to find a way to win and that's just what marks a good team. If you can win on the road, you're normally a pretty damn good team and we can win on the road. We just got to operate better. I have to do a better job. I think he continues to improve.

and gets better and better, and it seems like every week. And I think it all starts with his approach. And the guy loves football, and he will compete, and he does it every day. There's humbling nights like this in football. It's all about how you respond. I do know that this team has the capability to be able to respond, and we'll get ourselves off the mat, and we'll have a good week of preparation this week. I figured you guys would be nicer to me if my daughter was here. We had to beat the pressure, and, you know, a year ago, we don't win that game. And so...

You know, it wasn't our best, but it was good enough. I thought he played well. Obviously, he took care of the football, but I thought he battled like crazy throughout the whole game. It was a whole paradigm shift. Like, we were playing so well offensively, and then bang, bang, back-to-back drives with turnovers. And I'm just like, oh my gosh, like, this is really an NFL's film moment.

The snow starts pouring down. It starts getting like, I felt like my feet started getting heavy because I'm squishing through the snow. And man, it was so good. It was so great to end up getting that win.

Look at the smile that just sweeps across Mike Ryan's face. His dead Browns fandom, his killed by killed by Deshaun Watson. Jameis Winston brings Mike back to life. Can't help but smile when Jameis Winston is talking.

Greg Cody is now joining us from the Peloton-sponsored Victory Lap Room. Greg Cody, give us an update on everything that's going and what it is that you're celebrating that you got right most recently. Yeah, I'm working out with Peloton right now. I'm somehow in the middle of all these cattle.

I gotta move a little quicker. I don't know what's going on here, but Peloton helps me. Oh, come on. I tell you what, I'm taking a victory lap for saying that the Houston Texans are very, very, very, very, very far from being a great team.

I tell you what, nobody's been righter than me. C.J. Stroud, little bit of a sophomore slump. Team starts 5-1. Everybody says, you're the it team. You're the new Detroit. Then they go 2-4. Take a big giant crap. Look, I was right. I hate to brag, but these cattle, they're catching up with me. I got to move. No! Back to the moo job.

All right, listen. I'm going to take you guys behind the scenes here because Chris Cody saw it. Listen. I'm going to take you behind the scenes. Keep moving. Move. Listen. Look, I stirred your father. Your father fell asleep like 30 minutes ago. He was staring at his numbers on his podcast. Help. Help.

And Chris Cody comes into the room and both of us jostle him to life. Hey, this is a sponsored segment. We need your effort here. We need you to pay attention. So he was just totally self-involved. Like we were interrupting him. He was just thinking about himself. Hey, we're doing a show. We need you to go in there and give us your best stuff. And that's what he gave us. That is...

After the motivational speech by me and his son, what he gave us is two I gotta move it jokes.

And know that kind of thing. That's the only upset, though. And that victory lap is presented by Peloton. Find your push. Find your power with Peloton. I don't know enough about football because it's on my screen right now. Has C.J. Stroud regressed? He has. I just don't know enough about football to tell you, hey, all those guys sacking you all the time. That going to change the rhythms of how you do your job? The fact that everyone keeps sacking you at what appears to be like a record pace.

Will that affect how good you are in year two? Because it seems like it would. Anybody want to analyze that, or has he just regressed? He just forgot how to play football. Yeah? I think the thing that's concerning for C.J. Stroud are the interceptions. Do you see what they're doing for a living? Yeah. These giant people are coming and harassing him. They are bothering him. It's hard to play the position. Not many people can do it well. I'm asking the question. I legitimately—because the Texans are in and out of the red zone, I'm legitimately asking the question. I don't know. It is possible that people are studying the Texans.

A lot more than me, and they will tell you, yeah, C.J. Stroud regressed. I say, is it tied to the fact that he keeps getting sacked? Because it seems like that would make anybody regress. But when you start your career as a rookie and you're 23 touchdowns and 5 interceptions, and you're making the game look relatively easy,

Easy, Dan. That's the bar he set for himself. And now he has nine interceptions through half the season. Last year he had five total. So you want to say it's the offensive line, people sacking him. The excuse three weeks ago was Nico Collins was hurt. He could be holding the ball too long. That could be it, too. It could be his fault. Yeah, I think the most concerning game for me was one of his better games. It was against Detroit on Sunday night where protection kind of held up and some of his interceptions were essentially the DB's best.

baiting him into throwing these interceptions where for whatever reason he doesn't put that much zip on and he relies more on touch. Greg, you're breathing pretty heavily. Are you all right? Mm-hmm.

You know, the Peloton workout is working for me. I'm telling you what, you know, it really, they got me going and they needed to with those cattle. I don't know where those came from, but I'm lucky to be alive. It's a fair question to ask if he's regressed. Now, it could be true, like he could have regressed a little bit and the great ones figure it out after the NFL kind of figures you out. CJ needs to move.

around the pocket a little bit more. You know, that's what he needs to do. Bulldoze, do that joke now. Nailed it. Nailed it. You okay? Your father before the show, Chris. I always work out in a necktie and a button-down shirt. Necktie? That kind of thing. I took it off because I was getting so winded. Yeah, that's right. You were not wearing a necktie today. I thought I was. I was wearing my invisible necktie. Oh, that one. Can I forget? Bolo? Zagak.

This is his A material. This is after me and his son stirred him to life, stopped, you know, he was counting his clicks, and we stirred him to life and said, look, Greg, we really need you right now. We need you to bring it. The team needs you. And this is what he's giving us, this invisible necktie. I think this is what they call the runner's high, Dan. It is. Billy gets it. Thank you. All right. So I want to talk about this because I don't think that he was afflicted with the runner's high in the conversation that I had with him before the show.

This is something I have done in many ways. I've become my father. You will see Chris Cody become his father. And throughout my childhood, I saw my father sort of get in a wrestling posture stance with my grandfather and his brothers. And that's what I saw. Like these people were 80 years old and my father would jostle them and grab their elbows. So when I see Greg Cody, because I'm doing things that my father does,

I squared off against him when I saw him this morning by way of hello, like in a grappling and a Greco Roman style grappling stance. And what he said to me, and I believe him thick from 12 beers a day for many years. He says, I'm stronger than you think I am.

I'm tough to get off my feet. That if you and I were actually wrestling, he's saying that I couldn't get him off his feet. Great foundation. Yeah, well, sturdy, sturdy again from Miller Lite thickness. Just just he has been sustaining himself with a diet of Miller Lite for a long time. And now he's just strong. He is uncommonly strong. I don't think that he has any stamina, though.

You're not... Oh, Chris Cody says you're not strong. Chris Cody disputes... That sound was the sound of dispute. I mean...

I mean, you're 70 years old. I'm strong for my age. That's right. With that caveat, I don't know. I don't know the strength of a 70-year-old. I got a tough foundation. I'm difficult to move. Okay. Okay. And that's four. That was good. That one was all right. That one was all right, but you need the first three to make that one work. You got to fall in the ditch three straight times for the fourth one to work. So close to a golden sombrero there. All right.

You all right? Yeah. I believe he's strong. I believe your father is a strong person. I'm not going to say for any age, but I would say that he is hard to get off his feet. Do you think I could get him off of his feet?

Yes. If you lifted me and body slammed me. Well, I don't think you'd allow me to until I tired you out by making you do the Peloton read. I'm not certain Dan could lift you, to be honest. I am here for you two wrestling. I don't know how we ended up here, but I love it. I mean, there's only one way to find out, I guess. There's plenty of room back there. I agree. I agree. That's what I was thinking of. Like, do you think that I could get him off of his feet? This is not one of those fires. I don't know if Christopher can, to be honest. This is not one of those Billy Gill fires that you start, man. What do you mean? What do you mean?

There is context you missed it. I don't think there's going to be any coming back from that. Do you guys think Dan could lift Greg off the ground? Yes. I don't know. Greg is thick, man. I'm satisfied with that answer. I don't need to play it out. Guys, he's wilting away. He's like, what are you, like 180 pounds? What does that mean? Why do you say that? He said that on my podcast the other day, and I'm like, wilting away? I've gained seven pounds in the last year. I wish I were wilting more than I am.

For crying out loud. No, I'm the wilting away. What do you mean when you say wilting away? I think since the whole asthma thing, you've lost a good 30 pounds the last three or four years. That's absolutely not true. I absolutely wish it were. You know, I'm flirting with two. You were well over two, like in my 20s. I don't think so, no.

This is an odd argument. What are we arguing here exactly? That he's wilting. Well, Greg is saying he's getting fatter and Chris is saying he's losing weight. And when did it become a bad thing to be wilt? Wilt Chamberlain. I'm wilting like wilt. That's right. What are you doing? The stilt? Exactly. You know what? I'll take a weigh-in.

People should have to do weigh-ins in everyday life, you know? If I don't make weight, I'm not allowed to do the show this week. Oh, okay. That kind of thing. But you still get paid. Oh, that kind of thing. Thank you. Now that you've explained it that way with that elaboration, yes, once you give us that kind of thing, now we all understood. Why should we be doing weigh-ins in an invisible necktie? Let's hear him out. Because it would encourage me, like...

I happen to be right around 200 pounds, right? So when I get on my beautiful new digital scale, you know, I hold my breath. Is the number going to start with a 2? Is it going to start with a 1?

I thought you thought that helped holding your breath. Do you trust the digital scale? I do. I kind of picture you as a guy that's like, you know what, I'll check it at Publix. No, it weighs me down to two-tenths of a pound. Wow. And so I trust it because it's that specific. So when I get on the scale and it says 199.4, yeah! You ran down. It's big. Yeah, all of a sudden it's 199.4.

But when I get on the scale and it says 201.2, it's like, you know. Now I'll have five Miller Lights tonight. No, the whole Miller Light thing is a joke. I do love Miller Light.

I'm going to tell you, I don't know who the beer sponsor is of this show, but it should be Miller Lite. It is. Miller Lite. Save it up you. But the idea that I think... He's trying to show that he loves it regardless. I do love it. He's saying he's ungodly. I do not know that Miller Lite's been a legacy partner of ours for 15 years. No, I had no idea. That tells you my endorsement is legit. We stumbled into it. It's an authentic endorsement from a journalist who is not paid for his endorsement. Mike, you brought up the public scale. That is something I sprint past every single time. I can't.

Because that is the most accurate scale on the planet. Tell us too much truth. My daughters, I don't want it. I want nothing to do with that scale. I think that that's the best truth teller in all of South Florida. The most honest thing we have in South Florida. And it scares me. I do the same thing. I walk right past. I don't even look at it. I walk right past it. No, you tell too much truth. My daughter, my six-year-old, I was like, Daddy, let's go do it. I'm like, no.

I'd love to ask somebody at Publix corporate why they've kept those things. Because you would have assumed that would have been something that had fallen by the wayside. They've got to be hard to move. They're giant. It's a really inefficient scale. That can't be the reason why they still have them. It's hard to move. That is what it is. Publix is like, you know how long it is? They routinely switch things in aisles all the time. That's got to be the heaviest thing in Publix. You tell me there's a heavier thing in Publix to move. Give me one thing in Publix.

I'm normally in my boxer shorts.

That's a problem with the public scale. I can't strip down. You could. Shed some weight. Get arrested. That'd be a bit of a scene. But you know what I do in public? I'm curious if anybody else does this. If somebody's getting on the scale, I have to see how much they weigh. What? It's a toxic trait. I'm with you. I'm with you. I'm with you. My peripheral, I'm like, let's see. That's why I won't get on it. It's the truth teller. It doesn't keep quiet about the truth. It tells the truth teller.

There's a fair amount of sizing up. And I'm like, oh, really? You've got it wrong. It's so big, it's so easy to read. I know. And everybody wants to know. I'm watching a woman get on the scale. I'm like, all right, she's going to be 138. Okay. Oh, wow. I'm curious how much she actually weighs. Over-unders. I love your business. Not in a judgy way, though.

It depends. Yeah, it does depend. I can be a little judgy. It depends. Why do you think I've avoided that thing? It's not numbers. All it spells out for me is the word shame, and everyone can see it. Everyone can hear it. The truth-telling green machine that can't be moved out of public. The shouting to everyone within distance. Hey, fat guy making me groan under his weight. Ha ha ha.

I'm like that on any scale. When I get on the scale at the doctor's office every time I go, you know, my standard joke is these shoes weigh 20 pounds each. Right. Because I want them to realize that I'm fully clothed. Right. I'm wearing heavy shoes. Mm-hmm. You know, take off 10, 15 pounds, you know. The doctors judge a lot. They do. Yeah. Yeah, I don't like it. No, I don't either. Leave me alone. Yeah. Mm-hmm. It's like act. Right. I mean, I'm going there to get fixed, but...

Mack Brown is out at North Carolina. He just informed his team. He was apparently given the option. Hey, step down or we'll fire you. He's going with the fire route. So Mack Brown has left North Carolina or been unceremoniously canned. We'll figure it out. But a nice job has opened up.

A nice job has opened up that should have gotten him fired when he gave up 52 at the half at home to James Madison. Like right there on the spot. He tried to quit though. He quit, yeah. We too, he quit. He's like, ah, I'm done. And they're like, no, Mac...

No, not how it works. That's part of the Mac Brown life cycle. Yes. I'll quit. No, actually, thought about it. Don't want to quit. You're going to have to fire me. This has to be the final job, though, for Mac Brown, right? Careful with that. Always be careful with that. I'm just saying, Danny's 73 years old. Always be careful with that. Isn't he really? Yes. Always be careful with that. Okay.

Peloton has what you need to keep you on track to your goals, no matter what season of life you're in. Friends, we're all different. We have different schedules. We have different needs. Some of us are injured recovering from stuff. Some of us are young parents, youngish parents. We just don't have the time. We're at different fitness levels. That's why Peloton's perfect for you. You can challenge yourself anywhere with Peloton's all-access membership. You can work out where you need to, like at home, on your bike,

Tread a row or you can take your favorite classes to go and take them at the gym with the app. No need for a personal trainer. You got Peloton and Peloton is perfect for mindful moments during the sports season. Your favorite team just lost. You don't know what to do. Hey, guess what? Take a breather, lay down and take a mindful meditation class on Peloton. Unwind.

Forget about it. You know what else you can do with Peloton? Oh, I can't believe we just blew that game. How am I going to sleep? Boom. Peloton has classes for sleeping. Just put it on and fall asleep. Find your push. Find your power with Peloton at onepeloton.com.

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The crown is yours.

Don Levitard. Imagine if someone told you you couldn't have a Corvette. Stugatz. I'm a grown-ass man who's not filthy rich. I can't afford a Lamborghini. Well, I probably can, but...

This is the Don Levitas show with the Stugats.

Stugatz's book is climbing up the charts. He is counting all of his sales throughout the show. He's a little distracted. You will forgive him. Why am I being careful with Mac Brown? Because I'm just telling you that Mac Brown, saying that that's his last job, I would have said that maybe a couple of jobs ago. What's he weigh, Mac Brown? Any idea? That's a good question. I'll check it out. Thank you.

We are being joined. It fluctuates. I'm going to say 210. He's got it. 220. What's his height? What's his height? Give me his height. Is he wilting?

No, I mean, Mac Brown has been living the good life for a long time, and Mac Brown's got a pretty substantive... I recognize the belly of success. I recognize it. He's 5'11". Let's play the guessing game that Greg likes to play. How much do you guys think Mac Brown wins? No, you would absolutely shame Mac Brown at a public scale. You would. I'm telling you, Mac Brown looks skinny. Mac... Oberman's got this. The late Fred Hickman. I was always jealous of this. It's television. They have the face that makes it look skinny, but then they got the...

pear-shaped bodies where you're like, oh, that person's a lot heavier than I thought they were. Taylor tells me that he's a bit of a unit. Hmm.

Taylor's our North Carolina correspondent. However, I was told at the last Flanagan's outing that this show needs less Taylor. So I could... By the way, retroactively, this is Taylor's scoop. He texted me in the middle of it. He's like, I'm hearing things. That's how he talks. I'm hearing things. Mack Brown, I've seen a substantive belly. I don't mean to fat shame him. I'm just saying I don't think he's as skinny. I think of him as not as a skinny person and it's because his face is skinny. Steve Healy's with us now.

And Steve Healy, Stugatz, is going to help us get your book on the New York Times bestseller list. Unfortunately, the Times declined to make anyone available to explain how any of it works. We did pepper them. I don't like the mystery around this whole thing. I mean, I'm just putting myself on it. That's not how it works. We reached out to James Patterson, John Grisham, and Stephen King, and they either declined comment or they said no dice. And so Steve Healy is what we've settled in on. Steve Healy is going to...

He's going to help us. He's an Emmy-winning writer for Veep, The Office, and Letterman. He's appeared in an episode of 30 Rock, so he knows what funny things are. He's the co-creator of a new animated show called Common Side Effects. It's coming to Adult Swim and Max early next year. And he's the author of the award-winning book,

How I Became a Famous Novelist. So, Steve, thank you for joining us. How would you help Stugatz? He doesn't need very much help. He's sailing up the charts right now as we speak. But what little extra would you give him to goose this thing here? Okay, first of all, congrats to you, Stugatz. I'm glad to be here. I thought I was coming on as a Mac Brown weight expert, but I guess we can pivot to book. No, that's okay. Do you agree with me that he hides a bit of a gin belly?

Yeah. He's one of those guys who like, he looks like he weighs more than he actually does. Right. Some of it's just sort of air and, and I have that. Yeah. What do you think he weighs though? If you had to guess, what do you think? Two, two 12, somewhere around there. Oh, that's a good guess. That's a good guess. I was going to say two 15. I know. I'll be precise. I don't know why, but how,

How do we get on this bestseller list? And what is the New York Times bestseller list? How does it work? Okay, well, that's a great question because they're deliberately strange about it. Nobody really knows. They don't really reveal their methods. They have a long explanation on their website where they say like,

You know, they poll well-established – they say well-established vendors as well as emerging ones. We know that they don't count books that are sold at conventions. So, Stu Gatz, if you're going to like the Stu Gatz Convention or whatever and selling books across the table, not going to work. Good. I'll cancel all conventions moving forward. Yep.

Yeah. No, you got to, the problem for you is you got to sell them in actual bookstores. I think that's the only way the times counts. And I think they kind of underweight like Costco and places like that, that move a lot of books, but wait a minute, wait a minute. What? This doesn't account for the modern age. Stugatz isn't going to sell a bunch of books because people are walking into bookstores. He's selling them because people do it the new fashioned way. They order it online.

They're holding, I mean, they do, they do measure online sales, but, uh, they sort of favor, I think actual bookstores. Now I don't know a lot about, they hide their methods and won't reveal it. So I can't tell you that much insight. You can look at their website and find a bunch of mysterious opaque language. Okay. But I, I have put together what I think are your top five ways to, to sell. Before you do that, Steve, we have an image up on the, on the screen right now. What are you thinking? 240. Well,

I'm upping my estimate. Yeah, 315. Whoa, come on now. 315. 270. You're just saying numbers now. I think it's 245. He's 511. He's 511.

Look, I don't want to do this anymore. That's true. Put it on the Paulette Labattard show. Is anyone 5'11"? I'm actually 5'11". No one's 5'11". Not at 73. Say you're 6 feet. Everyone says they're 6 feet. You're 5'10". You've got a top five list for us? Full proof ways to game the New York Times bestseller list. Are we doing the five? Are we doing outside looking in or just the five?

Let's start with the five. We can do some outside looking in if I can come up with something after. Okay, well, no, that's not the way outside looking in works. You're supposed to do those first, but that's fine. Let's just get to the five. Oh, okay. No, number five. Hey, guys, your show. Hey, number five, I would say sell copies in bulk. You need to be selling copies to, like, the Stugatz Reading Club, the Stugatz fan group. A lot of conservative authors, they're selling, like, thousands at a time to big groups of people, and that moves the needle. I think the Times bestseller was kind of like...

tries to devalue that, but that's just a way to move a lot of units. And if you're not selling in bulk, I don't think you have much of a chance. I love moving units, but you're saying sell in bulk. So if I buy like a thousand for myself, does that count? Or is it one per email address?

That's a great question. People have gotten busted doing that, trying to game the New York Times. I wouldn't recommend it. They're not so dumb that they're going to fall for that one. But Dan can do it, though, right? Again, they're going to be watching that. It's going to be suspicious. It's going to set off the algo. I would say you've got to move them one at a time. But look, if you have a mass mailing list you can reach out to, a bunch of people buy them all at once, nothing wrong with that.

But you yourself, they're all given the same address. They're going to be on to that. Okay, good. We've lost Mike Ryan. He's immersed in breaking news, and we've lost him. So I found out that Mac Brown told reporters before the season that he lost 35 pounds during the offseason. I don't know if the image that we put up there was from last season or this season. So I'll still work my sources.

Texting Charlie. The man won a championship in the greatest college football game ever played. This is how we're remembering the end of his career. Number four. You guys owe him an apology. Okay, number four, be about Donald Trump. The last, like, since 2016, a ton of books on the bestseller list have been about Donald Trump, insider accounts of Donald Trump, how he ended up with Trump.

Books about sort of like the rise of fascism that scare everybody. So haven't read your books, Dugatz, but I'm hoping that there's a lot about contemporary politics, some insider stuff from Mar-a-Lago. Right now, Melania is on the bestseller list. How are we plugging into that demo? Here's a quote from before the season. I'm feeling the best I have in 20 years. Number three for you.

Okay. B for old people, like young people are on TikTok. They're not reading books. If this is for kids, I mean, there is a kid's bestseller list. You could go that way. Uh, for the, for the kids illustrated edition. But other than that, you need to be hitting like a 55 year old woman who reads a lot of books in a year. And unfortunately for you, I don't think you're exactly positioned for that. Uh,

Don't hit a 55-year-old woman, Stukas. Apparently the photo that we threw up there, though, was from the James Madison game this season. Oh, wow. Yeah, that changes everything. Wow, so the scoreboard at halftime was the second most embarrassing thing that game. Number two.

I would. OK, you explain why everything's fine. There's a lot of books on the bestseller list that are about why we're in the predicament. We have we are like what's going wrong with society. Don't know if that if you cover that, Stugatz, I don't think this is. He does not. This is not this is not shaping up great. He'll do well with 55 year old men. You made a 55 year old woman, but it can be 55 year old men. Right.

Sadly, women read a lot more than men. I don't know if that'll sound like a shock to you guys, but women are cranking through books and men read like one book a year. So you're on an uphill battle if your target audience is men. Put it on the poll at Levitard Show. Do women read a lot more than men? Yes or no? Number one.

Well, you've got to have a murder in there. Is there a murder in the book? Is it true crime on the nonfiction? Every book on the fiction list has a murder in it. Basically, you're in trouble if you don't have a murder. Wow. Okay. He's murdering nothing except for ethics and all of publishing. I did murder Kevin Durant's career.

I mean, so does that count? Yeah, it should. Yeah. Not, it doesn't sound like it. Uh, his book is called common side effects. That's $5. It is, uh, I'm sorry. That's not his book. That is the new show. He's got coming out. Common side effects. It's adult swim and max early next year. That's $5. I corrected myself. Uh,

I mean, you can see what's happened. I pivoted away from being a book writer to TV because there's no money here, man. You're in a tough racket. Well, you didn't get the Random House guarantee on the front end that Stu Gatz did, sir. That's why we made him an author, just so that he could cash the check. Listen, you need to get to Random House, okay? That is the key. All right? That's the key to writing books. Get to Random House. You got yourself a bestseller. All right? They treated you right? Yep. I'm telling you, they're printing money over there. They gave it to me. I mean...

There you go. Printing money. Sounds illegal. Steve, thank you for being on with us. We appreciate it. My pleasure, guys. Good luck to you two guts, and good luck to Mac Brown on his weight loss journey. Yeah, I don't love what we did to Mac Brown there. That is an accomplished career, and I did it. It's my fault. But it's just, look, man, I just noticed.

I, too, have done the thing where I just put on sweatpants because it's all gotten out of control. And I'm just putting on whatever the school gives me. Whatever the school gives me is my wardrobe because it fits nice and I can just go into work and I can hide and swim in my clothes. And the pandemic got a lot of us. And Mack Brown was skinny when he had Vince Young. And then when James Madison is scoring 52 by the half in your home stadium at the end of your career, comfort food, I get it.

Understand how it is one would stress eat, as Steve just mentioned it. And Mac Brown not only won a championship, won a championship at a school that when you do, you should be golden forever. You become a monster icon because Texas thinks...

at least in part because they have Mack Brown, like they're entitled to be atop the NIL game and on top of the SEC game because they got all the boosters. They got all the money. Like you think Texas A&M has money. Nobody's got money like that school and they expect to be at the top of sports and Mack Brown at the end got run out.

Because his great seasons weren't great enough and he ends his career in North Carolina with us making fun of him because we're talking about the way public scale's grown. I think it's a terrific job, though, that just opened up. The Carolina job. It's always going to be a weird one because it's never going to be the most important sport to that school. However...

People have no idea what a revenue generator that school is, what great resources they have. Everybody inside the ACC is envious of their situation because to other conferences, they're probably the most appealing program to bring over. So I think...

Some really good coaches should be poking around that job. Mike, in terms of generating revenue, you mean the other sports at Carolina. I agree. There are several popular sports at Carolina that aren't popular at other schools. Plus, they have major boosters. Carolina is a massive, massive program, but they've never really gone all in on football. And if they ever do, that's a possible sleeping giant.

Guys, can you please get me the sound from the Manning cast of Vrabel talking about Urban Meyer not knowing who he was and whatever sound is available to us on Owen Wilson and the stories being told everywhere about what Urban Meyer doesn't

know. The Vrabel thing stunned me. I thought that was a joke. Like, it's one thing I've heard of, like Pukanakua said the other day, that he didn't know that the Rams were in the NFC West. I believe that that's something that happens, you know, pretty frequently among athletes who don't care about, didn't grow up caring about the division. But I was shocked to learn that Urban Meyer doesn't remember

member famous people that he's worked with. Well, so the Manning cast is this like a side cast, for those who don't know, during Monday Night Football where Peyton Manning, former quarterback, and Eli Manning, quarterback, also related, not just a coincidence. They come on and they kind of do like a watch-along of Monday Night Football. And during the Manning cast, they have famous guests come on. It's usually Bill Belichick, and then they'll have like a celebrity of sorts, and then they'll have someone else come on. So, they had Luke Wilson come on. Because Luke Wilson can't do anything without Owen Wilson...

Owen Wilson came on and he joined him. And they did, I guess, like a brother thing. And they did a movie together. And that's all they ever do together. So they came on the Manning cast together because they need to hold hands to do things together. Why are you taking the Wilsons out? I'm not. I'm just explaining to people who don't know what the Manning cast is. Why would you do that? Luke Wilson is an actor. And Owen Wilson is an actor. Arguably more famous than Luke. Let's just play the sound of Owen Wilson and Luke. You never see one without the other. Thank you. We asked you to set this up to avoid confusion. Well, I'm trying. Yeah. So then anyways. I want to hear more about what the Manning cast is.

the Manning cast is. Let's play the sound of Luke Wilson and Owen Wilson. Owen Wilson talking about Urban Meyer doesn't know anybody. Who are you? How do I know you? I'm on your team. So Owen Wilson... Coach knows who you are now.

I still don't think he did. That's a little like when Larry Bird went to Indiana and was dealing with Bobby Knight. They just didn't see eye to eye right from the get-go. So Owen Wilson was in a celebrity flag football game, and his coach was Urban Meyer. And then Urban Meyer, as you could hear, went up to him and he said, Hey, how do I know you? And then Owen Wilson said, I'm on your team. Oh.

Put that up again, please, Mike Ryan, as our chief investigator in matters of people giving you phony baloney colors in their hairs. Mike Ryan has found... You can throw up that quad box again from the Manning cast. I think we have an unprecedented four dye jobs all on one screen. Yep, I'm ready to call it.

From the bottom on down, that is all hair dye. Owen, you see. Oh, yeah, definitely Owen. I'm with you on all the other three. I don't see it in Owen. But this is your thing. Owen's hair is darker. That's not how that works at this age. Yes, this is stunning accusation to make off of this video. He's saying Eli, Peyton, and both Wilson brothers are all dyeing their hair. Wow, Eli's a little young to dye his hair, isn't he? Nah. He's the most obvious of the group. Really?

Let's play the sound of Rabel, though. This one caught me off guard. Even by Urban Meyer's a bit of an airhead standard, this one caught me off guard. You know, I can relate with Owen Wilson. I was listening earlier, and Urban Meyer asked him, do I know you? And Urban Meyer was coaching the Titans. He was coaching the Jaguars, and he actually said the same thing to me. I said, yeah, I'm the head coach for the Titans, and I worked for you for two years.

Are you kidding me? That's insane. That's crazy. That's unbelievable. Wow. Not very well like this guy, huh? I mean, label wouldn't even tell that story if it hadn't been told first by Owen Wilson.

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