Giggling about trad wives, Olympics, and fan behavior
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That's 20% off at American-Giant.com, promo code ANYSTYLE24. Sup, gigglers? Gary, fix the Wi-Fi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed. I mean, the day just got away from me. What is up, my Olympic gold gigglers?

Oh my gosh. I feel like I haven't been able to watch any of the Olympics. I actually, I'm so into the Olympics for no reason. They're not easy to watch. You can watch on Peacock, but then there's like too many for someone with ADHD. I'm like, well, am I supposed to watch skateboarding, volleyball? I didn't even know I wanted to watch shooting. And then when they switch it, I don't like that.

Yeah, because you get so invested in one person's story and then they're like, and now time for swimming. And you're like, but what about the gymnast? Not to start the pod off on like a really dark note, but what is up with the one guy on Team Germany that they're like letting be on the team? And he's like a convicted rapist, like of like a 13 year old girl.

Oh my God, I didn't know this. It's like very weird. I feel like no one's talking about it. I haven't seen it. Where did you see it? TikTok. No, people were talking about it and then I looked it up and on TikTok it was the girls were saying...

that he like went to jail for like four years. I'm also like very confused. Does each country have their own like rules set of rules? And then like the people that are there from North Korea, do they have to tell like prepare them? This is the thing before like, Oh, you're about to see the world. Like we like, Oh, by the way, like this is what the world looks like. Do they, how do they not go into shock?

I think that it's this year is giving a little Hunger Games energy. I feel like we've never felt like it before. And now we're like, like, you know, there's like Russia and everyone's like, they're like, how y'all doing? Literally, I feel like the Olympics is probably so much like awkward, nervous energy. No, like it's there's wars happening. And then they're like, let's play like paddle. No. And then like break dancing.

Look, we support all women in the arts. We do. But I also want to know, how do you get something to qualify for the Olympics? Like, what is the rigmarole? Also, shout out to Ali Reisman, the gymnast, who...

Watched my stand-up special And I was like Oh my god This is crazy Oh my god She's been going on Instagram Like trying to explain Stuff Because This is a problem They'll have these commentators Who are clearly like Gymnast commentators And they're not explaining it For people who Why would I ever Be even able to see Gymnasts At any other time Right

Why would I ever know? I don't even know where it is. So they're not explaining it for us. So Ali's trying to explain it, but there's a lot of like world championships. They have to win the world championship to qualify. Honestly, I couldn't get through understanding most of the things, but

Also, do you know that countries pay people different amounts for winning gold? I saw that. So like China, if they win the gymnastics gold, they get like $700,000 or whatever that converts to in their cash. And then U.S., it's like 50K. And then like Norway, it's like nothing. And I'm like, I feel like this... One country gives you like a three-bedroom apartment. Yeah.

One country gives you a plant, the plant that's going to die. That's why I think it's just so interesting from that perspective. America gives you a Kohl's gift cash card.

They just give you points. They don't know. You get like a 16 handles punch card. That's like halfway through. Sky miles points. You get an Applebee's dollar Rita. No, it's kind of weird. And it's giving hunger games. But also, I love how we've gone full negative. I try to be positive. But that's not the space we're in today. It's not the energy we're bringing to the function. This is the energy I want to bring. Wait, I have another negative thing to say. You know what? I'm embracing it.

I'm really disappointed at America's opening ceremony outfits. Wait, the fact you just said disappointed is the meanest thing you could say. No, because I was like, I'm just, I'm actually saddened by it because it's like jeans. That's like disrespectful. Like let's dress up a little like no other countries in jeans. We have to make everything so dressed down and it really like annoyed me. Are you crying? You don't wear jeans to the fucking opening ceremony.

If they're going to do jeans, they could have at least done like a darker wash. Yeah, at least do like a capri. No, I mean, just we looked ridiculous and we could have had like different styles. Like I was fine with the blazer, but we could have, I don't know, made it look more like lived in. You know, they all look very like...

Out of the box. They all looked very uncomfortable, I felt. But you know what? Athletes wearing normal clothes always kind of gives that energy, which is why like they should on full skims. No, like where is Kim Kardashian to save the day? Well, they're sponsored by skims, but I guess just the undergarments or something. Yeah. Look, there's just a lot going on. I do think it's funny. The TikToks of just like the Olympians being like pretending they're in the villa like Love Island. Yes.

The rugby girl who's like iconic. Alana. If I don't get a room at the satai, I'm not going. No. Okay. That's the other thing. Here are these, the best of the best athletes in the entire fucking world. They're competing at the number one thing they work for and they don't have comfortable beds. How do they recover?

No, this is this is the thing. If you're going to spend so much money on like stadiums or whatever they do, put a fucking I don't even know how comforters work. Put up at least a layer thing on it. A soft layer. Give me a feather bed to throw on top.

Get out. What are those hyper pedic, mad temper? Get a temper pedic. Yeah. Like why is temper pedic energy? Couldn't call mattress firm and be like, Hey, quick question. Can you sponsor the Olympics? We actually know mattress firm. Like we're tight. We could have put a call in. Cause we're professional sleepers. We, I know a guy, I would have got hooked him up with mattress firm. Um,

Like I am very concerned about their sleep. Well, cause didn't one of the gymnast guys like get a mattress sent in as he should. I think he did. But my biggest gripe with all of it is that these people train their whole lives in a lot of sports that like they only make money possibly at the Olympics and maybe the world championships. So then they're just like on sponsors, which is like not a lot of money. And then if they don't win, like that's it.

And then if they do win, they get like sponsors for like two to three years. And then it's it's over. You have to figure it out. No, that would send me into a tailspin. And like it's so admirable that you want to be great at something. But I just feel like there's not enough money. And I'm not trying to just be like, yes, teachers should also get paid more money. But there's just something sad about putting your whole life into one niche thing.

And then being really great at it. And then two years later, when you turn 26, you're too old and you have to find a new life. That's literally me turning 30. You just described what went through my head turning 30. I was like, and now I have to find a new life. Well, yeah, their whole identity is in this sport. Also shout out my freshman roommate from Alaska is playing rugby and she's 32. Yeah.

Did you ever go to Alaska to visit her? No. Her name is Alev. Her name is Alev Kelter. And she, shout out Alev, she did soccer and hockey at Wisconsin. She was a two-sport athlete, which was like insane. And then now she's doing rugby. And I turned on the TV and they were like, Alev's beating someone's ass. And I was like, that's not a girl. Oh my God. Rugby is also like, I can't believe they don't wear helmets. Yeah.

That's all I could think of. The thing is, though, not to get all sportsy, but helmets can sometimes cause more CTE. Oh, God. As someone who knows a lot about CTE culture, because I have had sex with a football player once. One time. One time. No, but the Olympics are fun to watch. I just hope that... Then...

not to get all mental health about it but then even when they win they say that they all get depressed like they win the gold and then they get more depressed okay well it's like when people say that like after your wedding you get really depressed yeah because like you're like working for this thing like you're planning it and then all of a sudden like it's over like the next day and then you're just like oh my god so i that like so are we telling people not to chase their dreams

Like, is that the lesson we've learned? It's like, it's not really worth it. Maybe we just took a nap. You want what you can't have. And then when you have it, you're upset. But I do have to say, to be positive, if that's okay with you. Let me check. Yep, that's fine. Oh my God. A little chicken just came into the frame. Definitely. Yeah.

No. Paige, can we get a Daphne update? Can you tell everyone how she's doing? I don't. I'm scared for when I'm a mother to a human because Daphne is the smartest cat I've ever met. She's obviously the most gorgeous. She is the most playful, the nicest. She has the best personality. She's all right. She's polite. She's well mannered. Yep. She's.

She's regal. She sleeps through the night. She snuggles. She runs. She's just perfect. I have to ask the question that everyone is wondering. Is Craig jealous? Of how much I'm obsessed with Daphne? Yeah. You know, he's not because Daphne also, if there's one thing about my daughter, she is a whore. So she will lay on her back for literally anyone who's around to scratch her.

And it's a woman's world. She can literally do whatever she wants. But no, so she likes him a lot. So he doesn't really get jealous. When he doesn't talk. Because she will go over to him. Do you have anything to say to people who say that cats are not affectionate? Cats put that out. Sounds like something a cat would say. And they're liars. They're liars or cheats.

And cats definitely are doing their own PR. They're like, don't get us because we'll hate you. One thing about cats. Cats drool. Drool? Drool. Yeah, cats smoke cigarettes. Cats smoke cigarettes. Cats drool. Dogs, they like have a weed gummy and then call the ambulance. I had like one final positive thought. Oh, yeah. When I got married, the day after I felt

Yeah. Because I was like, thank God it's over and nothing hugely went wrong. Right. And everyone's okay. And we did it and no one's mad at me. Yeah. Like I literally would just wake up, be like, is anyone mad at me?

And if the others know, have a good day. Wait, can we discuss how like in high school when someone was mad at you, it was like the world was over. Like when one of your friends was mad at you. Well, everything in high school felt so permanent. And now like if someone's mad at me, it takes me two to three business days to even like get around to that. You know, I'm like, oh, and what is she pissed about again?

No, that's so valid. I just remember when I'd find out someone was mad at me in high school, I'd be like, how could I be so misunderstood? And how could this happen? And why would it happen to me? And I would never, ever want this person to be mad at me. And it was like my whole life was about making sure this person wasn't mad at me. And you're right. Now you can't keep track. You're like, get in line. I feel like you were so dramatic. Yeah.

In high school? I was just trying to avoid, I wanted everyone to love me at all times. So when naturally something would happen and someone would get mad, it was like the end of the world. See, when someone would get mad at me, I feel like I would double down. Well, yeah, you went to an all-girls school. You guys were like doing like, you guys were like witches. You were like putting spells on each other and shit. Probably. Probably.

Where I was always the new kid. So, like, if I had someone mad at me, that meant, like, we had nothing. We had no one to back us up. Yeah. No, I honestly couldn't even imagine that because I went to the same school from kindergarten to eighth grade. So even, like, going to high school, I was scared. And I had, like, 13 girls I already... That were, like, going from my school. This is how fucked up my life was. I...

in eighth grade to a school. So like ninth grade, all the new kids came, but I was still considered the new kid because I came in eighth grade. And then even more fucked up, I went to tennis academy, came back,

Started middle of junior year No So I just sat in a class That's social suicide Middle of junior year is diabolical Coming back from the holidays You sit down and there's just a new girl And social studies And guess what was craziest about me? I was raising my hand I was raising my hand Like, did she think she was raising her hand? No

I feel like I wouldn't, I would have crumbled with anxiety. Boys and girls, you know, boys and girls. But this is the thing. I was on the boys tennis team, so it gave me street cred, but I wasn't. But it, wait, what a lore. What a fucking lore. No, that's, that's the thing about me. I was not, there were a lot of things I was not, but one thing about me, I had a lore. Yeah. Girls were like, what is going on with her? Cause like I went to prom that year.

Because I went with one of the guys on the tennis team and people were like, who is this girl? But I remembered there were girls that I knew from like the city and Brooklyn from middle school. And when I came into the school, I was like, we're friends, right? And they were like, no, no, no, no, no. You don't just come in and get to this echelon because they were like the cool girls. And I was like, I was like, dude, we used to like have play dates in middle school. And they're like, we do heroin now. And I was like, okay.

We don't have to be cool. Honestly, thank God that you were in like, you got into heroin. No, you could have become a drug addict. No, don't you feel like the like really, really cool kids, at least in Manhattan, like you had to do drugs. Yeah, I could see that. Which is fucked up. Yeah, because you had to have money, like rich family and drugs. And I was so scared of both things.

Rich families? What illegal shit? And now I'm like, if that's how I go, it's how I go. Either things. Why do rich people have to do illegal shit? Okay, wait. This is a great segue. Because speaking of rich people, so I'm sure you've seen all the, like, ballerina farm stuff. Oh, yeah.

See, I've seen it. Tell me the lore. Our new favorite word. Tell me the lore. Tell me. I don't know what's going on. I was seeing it in like piecemeal like things like I was seeing it on girls making TikToks. Then I was seeing some of like this girl's actual TikToks. And then finally, I just I turned into an adult this morning, a full woman, because I have a New York Times subscription now.

Would that mean you pay extra money on TikTok or you actually have a New York Times subscription? No, like I have a New York Times like article subscription where I can. Because you wanted to read an article about the trad wife. Yes. And actually there were a few other ones that I wanted to read that I had kept in the back of my head. So do you have the app? Yeah. And I'm going to. Do you have New York Times crossword puzzles now? I do. I've always had that. I've always had that. OK. I just haven't been like Wordle and shit.

It's not Wordle and shit. It's a lifestyle. It's a religion. Okay? Wordle is my religion. Okay, well, I'm going to be honest. I can't... I don't like playing Wordle because... No, because sometimes I'm like, okay, I'm not getting it, obviously, in four tries. And then I hear people talking. They're like, oh, my God, it took me like two tries, but then I got it. I was like, I wasn't even...

Wordle luck is involved with wordle. So don't let it make you feel bad about yourself. My mom and my brother were doing it on vacation and I was starting to get pissed off.

over it because they were getting it so fast and then I was just like you guys are stupid well you're really pretty so yeah that's what my dad said okay can you tell me what happened with the ballerina farm okay I thought they were like planning ballerinas or something like what do they mean farm so essentially there's this woman she is a mother to eight or nine kids okay she lives in Utah she's Mormon she got married at like

23 I don't know early 20s she's married to a guy he's 35 his family owns like JetBlue so rich they live on this like massive massive farm and the article was basically about how she was in the Miss America like for like Miss America but for married women and it was all yeah what what that's so weird

Can we cancel Miss America? I said it. Can we stop? It's a scholarship program. Oh, my God.

so but basically their husbands she studied at juilliard and all of these people are so mad that like she didn't go on to like live her dream and stuff and instead she's been popping out like eight kids with no like drugs she's like having them naturally and basically her whole tick tock is like taking you throughout her life she makes everything from scratch

And she has all these kids and she doesn't have any nannies and she does everything. And everyone's saying like watching her videos, like she looks miserable. Like this has to be the worst life ever. So there were some discourse online of being like, she chose this life. Like she's happy. Yeah.

She's happy. She can do whatever she wants. And then there's other people being like, I know, I know this type of woman. He's beaten her down so much. She'll never be able to get away from him because his family is so rich. She like lost out on doing her dreams. She really wanted to become a ballerina. She's always dancing all this stuff. I do have to say ballerinas have to retire permanently.

at 18 when they get boobs, but can please continue. Yeah. Ballerina is also like a little bit culty. So the first video that I ever saw that I was like introduced to this whole story was she's opening her birthday present. Okay. And as she's opening it, her husband's videoing her and she says, I hope it's tickets to Greece. Okay.

Like the country. I don't know why I just thought like Grease Lightning, like the play. Let me make that distinction to Hannah. It's not Grease the movie in play form. Grease the country.

I don't know why. I fucking hate musicals. I hate plays. I don't even know why that popped in my head. We're so tired right now. No, I'm so tired. I'm delusional. She wants to go to Greece. She wants to go to Greece. This poor bitch opens up a birthday gift and it's an apron with a bunch of like little hole, not holes, like little holders for eggs. No.

no i would just be like perfect this is perfect i wait i go wait this is literally better than grease so wait so they posted that and that's what started and so that was what started like this guy's the fucking worst like how well what did your mom say what did kim de sorbo say if you marry if you marry

For money. You'll work for it your whole life. But here's the other thing. And I want to make this like very clear distinction because I think I didn't even really know what trad wife meant. And like it means traditional wife in the sense of like you do traditional roles. Mm hmm.

I think if you want to do that, fucking pop off. The thing is, it's too hard. I would die. Like, this girl has eight kids and she does not have anyone helping her. It's literally just her. And she wakes up and she, like, milks cows. And it's like, how do you even have the brain function to do this? We're not saying, like, oh, like, she would rather live her dreams, da-da-da, and, like, doing traditional stuff is not feminist. It's fucking...

really difficult for one person to do. I was an aunt for barely two days this weekend. Barely two days. Yeah. Um, I,

I had to take three naps. I couldn't imagine. I was like, let's play. Take a nap with Aunt Hanny. Yeah. And I was like, wait, I think I figured out. Like this childhood thing is a freaking breeze. No, I asked my mom if I could like drug my kids on a plane and give them Benadryl. And she was like, that's literally illegal. No, don't ever do that. I'm like, it's fine. When you have kids, all you do is clean up.

And then they mess it up and then you clean up and then they mess it up and then you clean up. It's just look, it's a lot. But this woman has not said anything like help. No, she hasn't said anything that like she's unhappy. So that's why people are like, oh, you know, like you. We've the Internet has kind of made this up about her because like she does say that she like loves her life, whatever.

But it's Mormonism. It's also, I was just going to say, it's important to note that she is Mormon, that they are Mormon. And so that is a different. There's a belief system that she's been raised on that's different than other people's. We're not going to fight the Mormons today. We're tired. No, I don't have that fight in me. I never want to fight the Mormons. We did fight the Mormons before.

I think you can believe whatever you want to believe. It's just like some things are a little bit more cuckoo for me to understand, but that doesn't mean it's not your journey. There's a white salamander at some point. All I know is that I slept through the Book of Mormon because Craig made me go and it was one of the best naps I've personally ever taken. Well, my whole thing was like,

I did shows in Salt Lake City, Utah, which were so fucking fun. Yeah. And the Mormons, they, the people who are ex Mormons love making fun of the Mormons. And then the Mormons also like making fun of the Mormons. So I was like in deep making fun of all the Mormon shit. And here's one thing about being Mormon though, that like I could see. I,

I love getting away with certain shit when I was in high school. When you're not supposed to drink and you're drinking. If I was Mormon and I wasn't supposed to do something, finding a way to do it would excite me. And that's how... It's not squirting. What's it called? And that's how soaking was invented. Soaking. They put their penises in people's armpits. And whatever makes you...

Excited for living. Yeah. We don't judge. It's honestly, it's freakier than anything I've ever done. It actually sounds great. We would probably love it because we are tired. And it's like, sorry, I'm claiming religion on this one. Have you seen the man on the street Mormon TikToks? Those are my favorite. They were like, would you kill 200 kittens or drink coffee? And they're like, kill 200 kittens. They're like...

Would you punch a baby in the face or give a hand job? And they're like, punch a baby in the face.

Oh God. But yeah, they would, they're like allowed to take Adderall, but they're not allowed to like drink Diet Coke. And I was like, I don't know. I feel like, I feel like we all should take a second and just like update the rulesies because we're going by all the old rulesies of like old books and honestly men who are dead. So like, what if we like just rejiggered? Hannah, what a great campaign slogan. What are the rules again? So like, let's,

What are the rules again? I feel like we need to update the rules. It's like basketball. Over time, they change where the three-point line is. They made the ball a different size because we are changing and we're evolving. They've changed with the... There wasn't

even a three-point line back in the day. Wow. And you know what? The more you know. The more you know because this is a sports podcast. I think rulesies need to change all the time. Also, rules are made up to begin with. Also, rules are made to be broken. Here's something that we both can agree on and I love when we agree on something in the fashion space. It really excites me. It really makes me feel connected to you and you posted Daisy Edgar Jones. Wait,

someone messaged me and said that she is me and you if we had a baby yeah I could see that I could totally see that because she has like your I feel like head like she has like your hair vibe like slightly unbrushed not too polished and like very elegant but you know what it is you know why

She's European. She's British. Yeah. She's British. So like they do things differently. Let's take it back to like OG, OG Giggly Squad when this was on Instagram live. We were watching normal people. And I was like, wait, have you guys discovered Irish men? They're amazing. I had such a crush on him. You manifested your husband.

Yes. So Daisy, I want to go back and rewatch that. I haven't watched that since that time. I don't know if you should. You'll like, it's like, you'll cry. Oh, right. It's like really. No, I'm going to do it. Okay. You're going through something right now. I love a challenge. There's also a funny part where like, it made no sense. Like there was something that happened that I was like, all he had to do was like communicate with her. And Des was like, Oh, in Ireland, that was him actually communicating really well. Yeah.

No, that was a great show. It's incredible. He's so hot. So this is the thing with Daisy Edgar Jones. She stopped having the bang look and she did like down the middle. And then she went on this press tour. Why do I feel like people don't even care about the movie anymore? They just care about the fashion press tour. Well, I literally kept seeing her in things and I was like, what is she's just like popping around all over town. Well, she had like five outfits a day. Yeah, I didn't even know what she was wearing.

What she was promoting, but she's promoting the new Twister movie with Glenn Powell. So that's on Glenn. I actually was in L.A. last week. Yeah. His name was brought up so many times. Was it? Because I basically was like, where did this Chupacabra come from? And.

Everyone was like look he's been in the business For like a long time And finally broke out My thing was like who decided He's the safe straight white man That we're going to put into things Someone said that of the nerdy guys He's the hottest and of the hottest guys He's the smartest And he's just like the safest bet right now And I think he's likable There's something about him I trust him I trust him but I do have to say I get no sexual energy from that man

Like I'm not attracted to him. See, okay, interesting. I get what you're saying. And I think because I can tell that he is like short, like he is a small on the smaller scale. Is he? Let's see. Because I haven't, you know that I'm not attracted to someone when I haven't even Googled their height. That is so telling. Do you know what it is also? His name is Glenn.

No, that's true. In a sexual forum, Glenn isn't what you're reaching for. I'm not even fighting with a man named Glenn. Like, I'm not even, I'm like, okay, Glenn. Go to a dentist with a man named Glenn? Absolutely. Absolutely. Get my taxes done by a Glenn? 100%. Okay, you know what? He's six feet. So he's really 5'8".

Yes. He's a little too pretty for me. And I want his he's just too. He know he looks like an A.I. movie star. But you know what? I support him and I I do like him. I'm just putting it out there. It's not for you. Not for not for me. But I would hook my friend up with him. He's kind of guy who like you have a friend who's single and you're like, yes, you know, he's not good. He's.

He'll give a good date. I would agree with that. He'll give a good date. And like wholesome and respectful on the date and like ask you questions. Yeah. And she'll be like, he's nice. He's nice. But like, I don't know. We'll see where it goes. And then like he doesn't text her and you're like, oh, OK. Oh, my God. You just nailed that. Just nailed that.

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Additional taxes, fees, and restrictions apply. See Mint Mobile for details. This episode of Giggly Squad is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give BetterHelp online therapy a try at betterhelp.com slash giggliesquad and get on your way to being your best self. Hannah and I are always talking about therapy, and honestly, sometimes we talk about stopping therapy too because sometimes it just gets overwhelming.

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By the way, I did something fashion-wise such a faux pas that I was like, I'm saving it for Giggly Squad. So you know when you pack something for a trip? What are you, a Long Island model? You know when you pack? You know when you're packing for a trip. So I'm packing and I was told like I had to do some meetings. I don't even know what that means because I'm not a corporate girly. So I'm like, I don't know what a meeting is.

So I packed stuff for the trip. And you know when the day of, you're like, there's only one thing I fuck with in here? Mm-hmm. So there's this one solid and striped dress that I was like, that is my dress. And I felt like that girl. I felt good in it. I wore it. Next day, I was like, okay, I don't like any of the other stuff. What is some of the other stuff? I packed like...

I packed a white dress that was just like too bridal. Okay. And then I had like jeans and a t-shirt that I just didn't feel like. Wait, wait, you know what's something that girls do as a community and we don't talk about it. Deep down, we know that we don't want to wear something or that we do. And we will come up with the craziest reason on why we can't wear that one thing. Like I'm sure no one thought that you were a bride. Right.

When you put that white dress on. At a 10 a.m. brunch in Los Feliz. Literally. But internally, we're like, this is too going out. Like, I can't wear this. This is too going out. Everything is our perception. Like, you know, when like everyone likes the outfit, but you just don't like like you can. Yeah. And also these meetings like I want to feel good about myself. I was like, I just had a Netflix special. Like, I'm I'm different now. Yeah. But and all those clothes. You're also just. And at the end of the day, you're a woman in like a corporate fashion.

America that you have to like at some like somehow look professional but also like be your personality yeah and I really was like this dress has to encompass who I am so I was putting a lot of pressure on it so I go you know what day two I go I'm just gonna wear it again because I had like two meetings yesterday I'm having meetings with different people today who the fuck cares no one's gonna see it no one's gonna know no one's gonna know

Day three comes. I go, you know what? We did it for two days. Why not do it? If we're going to commit, let's commit. Let's fully commit to the bit. Because this is my thing. Let's prove to myself that I can pack like an absolute queen.

I'm like, I could have just packed a backpack for a week in LA. Cause this is my thing. You know, when you order food, that's good. And then you're like, now I have to eat this meal every single day for the next month. Right now I'm on a real toast and butter. And my mom's at home with my uncle making homemade fucking jam.

And they're sending it to me. And so I've just been scarfing it up. Is she starting a jam company with your uncle? No, I'm like, what in the trad wife is going on at home? Is everyone okay up there? Is everyone okay? I went to Juilliard, but I decided I wanted to make blueberries in my kitchen.

I grew the blueberries actually I would love to pretend to be a trad wife like Des will be like hey can I breakfast I'll be like sure first thing they plant this tree and it'll grow in four years and then that's why like I'm really I'm not against like trad wife because there are certain things that I do like love doing like I love organizing my own shit and like cleaning my stuff and like having my like everything in my apartment like really clean talks I

I know I really should because I do love that and like I know when I have a baby I'm gonna be obsessed with like their area being like completely organized having all the stuff they need like I like that shit but I'm not gonna not like do what the fuck I want do you know what I'm obsessed with looking at my walls and thinking what art would look good on it and then ordering art and then putting it up and realizing it doesn't look good on it

And that's a trad wife. Wait, shout out. Anyone who's like an independent artist of any kind, can you DM me? Because I don't want to buy from these fucking like Wayfair companies. Conglomerates. Yeah. If I'm going to spend money on art that's not going to fit my home, I want it to be a

A small business This is not An ad or anything But I have really Been buying a ton Of shit from Etsy Recently I love Etsy I do love Etsy No I'll die for it I love Etsy But this is the problem With organizing a home Like

You don't know until you start putting stuff around and then you're like, oh, that really doesn't look good. And then you're not just like returning a couch. No. Do people return couches? It's everything so hard. Like I have a bookshelf here that I'm just waiting for someone to pick up. I'm like, I don't know what I was thinking. Where do you put it? I just like have it in my front. I...

I don't know what it is, but interior design truly, truly is a different part of your brain. And I like commend the people that can do it so well. Why don't they teach it in school? I can like pick out an outfit when it comes to like what goes in this room. I'm like, it's a whole different thing. Also, I love, as you know, Bauhaus funky design, but it's a thin, thin, thin line between funky and like,

Crazy aunt who's like on ayahuasca. Yeah. So it's like it's really like it looks like I just got drunk and like ordered everything online and put it in a room like there's maximalist and then there's like you need to see someone to talk about what's going on in your brain. And I wanted to be like Eloise at the Plaza threw up. I love that for you, though. But this is the thing. Why can't we have classes in school that give us like basic knowledge?

life thing taxes balancing a checkbook have you ever balanced a checkbook i don't even know what that means my mom's always yelling at me that i'm never balancing my checkbook the thing is i've never balanced a checkbook once and i'm 32 so i feel like i don't know what you're talking about everything's online bye i have a mental health moment i wrote this down and clearly this was said by someone i don't know who said it or regardless

Worrying is worshipping the problem. Wow. It's like worrying is like fan behavior of the issue. That's my whole personality. Like when you worry, literally be like it's giving fan behavior. Worrying is fan behavior. Wait, that's so true. Except usually it's about myself. So it's kind of, it's like, it's so narcissist. No, but it's like fan behavior of like you betraying yourself.

Of like your not authentic self. No, worrying is choogy, honestly. Wait, worrying is so choogy. It's so choogy. It's out. Like you don't need to worry about that. Worrying is like a farm wedding. I'm not getting it. Do you know everyone want to have a barn farm wedding? Yeah, like a Pinterest barn wedding. Yeah. I can confidently say I never did. I definitely did. There are a few things in life that like,

I know I never, I was never part of that class. You never saw, what are those mugs? The glass mugs? Wait, what? You never saw a glass jar and was like, that's kind of cool? Never. I never thought, let me put flowers in that, put it on my centerpiece for my table. No. So you just attacked my entire wedding? No, I was never part of the girl group that grew up wanting to be a veterinarian. Wait, that was me.

Wait, no, I want to be a vet until I heard that like the cat can get injured. And I was like, absolutely not. I'm not getting involved in that storyline. I didn't even stick around to hear what they did. I was like, nah, I'm not trying to do that. Thank you. I wanted to be a vet so bad. No, I feel like every little girl did.

And I was just Jennifer Lopez. I wanted to be a triple threat. It was like, she can sing, dance and act. You guys are idiots. I didn't know that JLo was like your everything. She was my everything growing up. I don't know why I loved her so much. And actually I do know what it was. It was a very simple pink, juicy couture sweatsuit in a music video. And I never looked back. I said, this is everything I've ever wanted.

this is so out of left field but we are talking about celebrities where is the celebrity do you remember that guy who was like young and like he was the new hot thing and his name was like noah or something noah centineo where is he he's my roman empire i think about him i think about him on a daily fucking basis i woke up in the middle of the night and i was like where is noah centineo

I can't believe you're bringing him up because he, for a solid period of time, I mean, I think he's way younger than us, but I was like, this guy is going to be the next big thing. He is so good looking. Do you think that he was doing his thing and then somehow Jacob Elordi came in and he just got squashed?

I don't know if it's that. I think he, I think he had, I think he took a step back. I think he took a step back because he was in all those Netflix movies and it was like to all the boys I loved before. And he gave such like lacrosse high school energy. And honestly, I felt dirty even watching it. And then, um,

Remember he had that whole PR thing, I feel like, during COVID with Kylie Jenner's best friend Stassi, where it was like they got married and everyone thought it was real and they were dating for a little bit. And then he just went dark on social medias. There is a where is Noah Centineo. I feel like something happened with him. I think something meant like he like something happened where he was like, I need to take a break from social media.

And honestly, I respect that. There's a question that says, is Noah Centineo still sober? He took a year off and now he revealed he hasn't cut out alcohol from his life completely. Okay, that's giving. There's more to the story. That's giving. No, I loved him though. I can't believe that just came to your mind because I am not kidding. I am always trying to talk about with him why.

to anyone who will listen. I'm like, where is he? What's he doing? Where is he? What's he doing? No, this is crazy. Wait, one thing I wanted to say about Daisy Edgar Jones that I didn't say was I'm really happy that we're in a time that like

I knew like all of her looks were phenomenal and I knew like she was on a press tour. So like she definitely had a stylist like who was her stylist because they just like nailed the persona she was giving for the movie. She's like presenting like she was very like sexy, but in like a really sophisticated way and then like very whimsical because it was like a nature movie, I guess. And unique. Very unique. Yeah, very unique.

And her stylist is Danny Michelle, who I like always see her. No, I think she's the best stylist ever. I always see her looks and can like tell it's her looks because they are very like sleek and sophisticated. She does Hailey Bieber a lot. She does Kendall a lot. Can you work with her? I think she's like too busy. Yeah, I think she's like too big for me. What if she's a giggler, though? Honestly, you never know. She could be.

I saw her at the LA Fashion Awards and she... I actually think she present... No, I think she won maybe for Best Stylist. Yeah, she's like 20. No, I think maybe she presented for Best Stylist. Either way, she's great. And I think it's just like a cool fashion like niche that there's more like emphasis on who everyone's stylist is. I like it. I like to know. Yeah, I like that a lot. I also...

I'm like getting into... I actually totally forgot what I was going to say because I just started thinking about jorts. The silence is deafening. Oh, also speaking of stylists, everyone was really mad about what I wore when I interviewed Joe Jonas. Everyone was really mad. What did you wear? Oh, you wore that pleated long skirt. Yeah. Now this is the thing. And my stylist did help me with it, but I went against my stylist because...

I was supposed to wear a tight thing on top and it like wasn't fitting or something happened where it was like uncomfortable. So I was like, can you just get me like a button down top? And she was like, she's at the point with me where she's like, we're chill. She picks her battles. She picked my battles.

She picks her battles. And we're in this like a really good place where she's kind of like, let Hannah have this. You know, you're like you're leaving preschool. You're going to kindergarten. You can dress yourself. And she's like, we're princess costume all week this week. But I felt so bad because like the one outfit that I was like, please just let me wear a loose top. Like, I can't deal with this right now. And everyone was like, fire.

Stylist And I was like Oh no no no no She didn't deserve this But then She redeemed herself Because on GMA No today's show Um

Everyone liked the outfit again. So I just want... Shout out to Tabitha. What was your outfit for today's show? I know I saw Nana. It was like a tan. It was like a tan skirt with loafers and like a blue collared shirt. I'm going through like a collared shirt stage. You're going through like a mailman phase. A hundred percent. Everyone has to go through it. School girl. It's like preppy, but like not...

You know what? It's basically Olympic energy. It's Olympic opening ceremony energy. Opening ceremony Olympic. But I do have to say, there's something about wearing jeans with sneakers that should be illegal.

And I do it all the time. You know, I actually couldn't tell you the last time I wore jeans with sneakers. Well, it was really frown. Here's the other. Here's one thing about my mom. She may not have been a stage mom and she may not have been an almond mom. But if she disagreed with something I put on in a fashion sense, I wasn't walking out of the house like that. And I think that she did train me. But like I didn't own sneakers.

Like I didn't know that girls wore sneakers not for gym class. That is so funny because my mom had to fight me to not let me wear just like my brother's clothes and sneakers. Like my sneakers I thought were for school.

Like obviously you're not like wearing sneakers anyway. You're like, that's for one hour of gym a week. And I'm going to say I'm sick during it. Because I remember all my friends in like middle school would be like, your sneakers stay so white. Like, do you clean them all the time? And I'm like, guys, where are we wearing them? Where are you guys going? We're going to the gymnasium and then we're going back to the classroom. What are you doing? Do you know how opposite we are? When I was little, apparently like I hated like,

picking an outfit to wear so bad. Oh my god it was my everything. To go to sleep at night my mom would dress me beforehand so I wouldn't have a tantrum in the morning in like whatever comfortable outfit I agreed upon that night. So I'd just wake up and she'd send me out. Meanwhile you woke up with like the clueless closet and you were like. I woke up with like birds chirping like bringing my dress over like

No, I wore I literally again, I would wear the same T-shirt like three out of five days. And my mom was like, pick your battles. Summer can be so busy and traveling is a lot. There's a lot of barbecues. There's a lot of parties. There's a lot of things planned. And that's where you have to take your health and wellness so very seriously. That's why I love Thorne's nutritional supplements that keep me at my best and ready to enjoy all of it. I've been obsessed with the Sleepy Girl mocktails for months now. I literally can't fall asleep without them.

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Oh, I have this new thing to say to fights with your significant other. Whenever like Des gets annoyed at me, I just look at him straight in the eye and I just go, I'm your lesson. So I'm like channeling North. Whenever anyone gets annoyed or pissed off at you, just go, I'm your lesson, you're welcome. Wait, what the fuck is channeling North? Channeling Northwest. Northwest.

Oh. Because she's Kim Kardashian's lesson and everyone's Kim will just be like, she's my lesson. She's my lesson. So then I thought you spent a little too much time on like horoscope TikTok that you're like, I'm channeling like North and like the North Star. I'm like, no, no, no. What is channeling North? I can't add something else. And can I actually attack astrology for one second? For sure. So.

two things happen when i click on the tiktok ones they'll be like okay leo and it's leo season shout out they'll be like leo everything in your life is gonna be amazing this month you're gonna get everything you want and then immediately you feel nervous like okay well now i feel like i have to get all this stuff because the horoscope guy told me to so you feel all this pressure to be great or or or it's like you're gonna get all your manifestations and you're like wait i hadn't been manifesting anything so what did you like now i have to like think of them

you feel unprepared thirdly today they were like it's august um just some updates and i'm like oh i'd love to listen and they're like there will be serious you know um communication breakdowns financial issues and i'm like i am literally just trying to wake up and

and survive and now I have all these things I have to worry about which worrying is worshipping the problem so now I'm worried about all these things I wasn't worried about before I saw this fucking astrology TikTok I find it best to stay away from astrology TikTok I went through a real dark time where I was like the psychics on TikTok are absolutely correct and I had to work myself out of that

Yeah, I do think that if you're having trouble making a decision, psychics can help lead you to your gut that you're having trouble addressing. But if you're just like having a good day, don't go on astrology TikTok. It'll take you down places you don't want to go and you'll find issues you didn't know you had. Remember when I said that I like think I have curly hair? This is what I'm talking about. Do you see these waves? This is so good for an audio podcast. Yeah.

I just need anyone to believe me. Do you have like, are you just fully doing side bangs right now? Are you trying to grow them out? Like, where are we? No, I mean, I still have my bangs, but when I let my hair air dry, I literally look like a 90s mom. And I was going to say you look like Topanga. No. And so I just go to the side and then I do a full side part when I'm air drying. Shout out to all the girls who have widow's peak and can't put their hair to the side.

Just like you're not alone. Wait, one of my girlfriends had a widow's peak and she got it lasered off. See, I didn't even know I should be insecure about my widow's peak until a couple episodes ago when you guys witnessed Paige verbally assault me. I always forget you have one. You don't really. I forgot I had one. I don't really, but there's something happening that, oh. I think you just have an uneven hairline. There's a lot of things that are uneven. Also, I can't wear a hat.

Like two types of girls, girls that can pull off a hat and girls who can't. And the girls who can pull off hats are so cool. You pull off a hat like in the airport when you wear your Nike hat. Thank you so much for saying that, because you do coming from the same household that wouldn't allow me to wear sneakers taught me that sneakers weren't even a real shoe. Same woman said that baseball hats are for baseball games and that it's you should not be wearing those types of hats anywhere. And that's one thing that I've fully rebelled on.

And every time she sees me, she says, it'd be better without a hat. But I love your travel outfit. I love my travel outfits with my hats. Do you want to hear something so silly that I realized? First of all, every Delta stewardess is a giggler. Every Delta stewardess. So I famously sleep on planes, like to the point that they're like, should someone check on her? So every time I wake up, a Delta stewardess is so cute.

And they put together these little care packages of snacks. And then this last one put together a care package of all these Delta headphones. And I was like, I feel like, are we going to get in trouble? Like you stole a bunch of Delta headphones. I'm so glad you brought this up because I literally forgot to tell this story. I literally almost needed to ask a Delta stewardess for fucking help the other day. Not really, but someone was trying to talk to me on a red eye flight.

No. I get on this. No. No. No. No. No. Just wait. No. No. That's illegal. That's illegal. I actually almost turned to him and was like, I'm calling the police. Like, this is so violating and so fucking rude. And you don't even give like talk to me energy. I don't. That's something that would happen to me. I don't give talk to me energy. That's something that would fully happen to me. I would say sorry after. Now,

Now, I may have given a little bit of talk-to-me energy on this flight because... It was common. No.

Imagine common ruins your red eye flight. You're like, I have a gripe to pick. So because my mom was on the flight with me, so I was, she was standing behind me and I went to like put her bag up first and then I walked back to my seat. So I was like interacting with another human. No, that's like, it wasn't. No, whatever. So I sit down and this man says, who's I'm sitting in the middle. Okay. So two people in the middle, I'm,

I sit down. He's already sitting. He says, where are you coming from? Nope. And I look around. I'm like, well, we're we're on we're on the same plane and at LAX. So I'm coming from L.A. and we both have tickets to go to New York. So like I wasn't understanding the question. How old was he? Probably like late 40s. Had an Australian accent.

Okay, so he's a spy. So he's like asking me where I'm going, whatever. And then he goes, do you fly Delta a lot? And I'm like, oh, yeah, sometimes. Then he starts asking me about the menu. And I'm like, it's 1130. I'm skipping dinner and I'm going to sleep. We're on a red eye flight. They're literally turning the lights off. I put my headphones on.

He starts talking to me again, being like, I'm going to have your dessert. I say nothing. I just look over at him. I'm like, okay, dude, now I'm done. I fall asleep. I sleep through the whole flight. I, I literally am sleeping so hard that the flight attendant has to come over, wake me up and say, put your seat up. Like we're landing. Oh, that's the best. Oh,

headphones still on i like can't see i'm putting my seat up i'm putting my seat up you're deaf you're blind no literally you could jump me in this moment and i'd give you everything like there's no i have no fucks given at this point i hear him talking and i don't even move my head i just move my eyes because i'm like there's no fucking way and he goes tell me the story about your shoes

And I was putting my, I had flats on, like little ballet flats. I'm putting like my silver ballet flats back on. I'd like taken my socks off that I pack, taken my socks off, put my ballet flats on. I just ignored him. I was like, it's 6 a.m. You sick fuck. It's always these middle-aged men that want to talk.

Find a friend. Like find a friend. Send a text. Literally send someone a text message in this moment. I've been the victim of this too many times to the point that like I have to like go to therapy about it. Like how does how do I keep getting stuck in these situations? How do I get out of it? I do have to say one thing happened on a red eye day.

Where a dude was snoring in front of me so loud that I couldn't sleep. And part of me was like, do we have a community moment where we...

off this man. There's so many times I'm looking for a community moment. Like I'm not fucking kidding you. I was like, can we vote him off? Like everyone's upset. He's outnumbered. I'll put a pillow on his face. Like just don't tell anyone. Like what do we do? I recently had a community moment. I was sitting at a dinner and there was a guy sitting at the dinner making our waitress uncomfortable and I locked eyes with the waitress and telepathically I said, if you punch him in the face, I've got your fucking back.

And like at that moment, I'm looking for a community moment. I do have to say New York City is really good at community moments. Yes. Because something will happen and you know someone will be having a slightly worse day than you and be like, shut the

And you're like, we got her back. We got her back. No, it needed to be said. It needed to be said. I did something stupid. Well, Des was like, did you download anything on the plane? Because I was complaining how American Airlines didn't have a TV on the back of the seat because I'm a monster. No. It was like a five hour flight. You raw dogged it? Basically. Yeah.

Well, you know what happened? So this is so embarrassing, but he's like, did you download anything? And in my head, for some reason, like AirPods, I'm like, definitely downloading, downloading

Must take four hours, like, to download a full show. I was like, I don't have time to download. Where do you live? What farm are you living on where you've just, like, you've excommunicated, you're like, Wi-Fi is a figment of your imagination. Downloading is not real. I'm going to blame ADHD on this because I think, like, some things I get too overwhelmed with. And I thought...

Okay, downloading means it has to... How many terabytes is that on my phone? And I just don't want to break my phone. And I'm like... Well, this is why you need a freaking iPad. Okay, let's not go that... I'm not... That's social suicide. Okay, you know what? You worked tirelessly to get me a cat. And by the end of 2024, you will have an iPad and a Stanley. What do you do with the iPad when you're not on a plane? I put it on its charger.

I color with it. You color with it. Okay. Sometimes if Craig is like watching a show and I want to watch something on my computer, but I don't want to grab my computer, I just grab my iPad. Okay. And I'll watch on my iPad. What else do I do on my iPad?

That's pretty much it. It's really for travel. And then like sometimes when you are traveling for a long time, you're like, I don't need to bring my computer. I have my iPad. Do you ever feel embarrassed that people can look over and see what you're watching on your iPad? Not embarrassed, but sometimes I'll watch something and I'm like, I don't know if I can watch a sex scene on a flight. True. Yeah. Yeah.

I was watching Dirty Pop on Netflix, which is about Lou Pearlman, who created the NSYNC and Backstreet Boys. Who are you, Backstreet or NSYNC? NSYNC. Okay, good. So long story short, I was like, what if I just press download? It took literally six seconds to download. Yeah, Hannah. Yeah.

It's 2024. How have I been traveling this long? So then I get there, but obviously I only have like 10% battery. So I have to charge my phone and then I don't have AirPods. So I can't watch it while the phone is charging. And that's when I said, you know what? You know what?

I'm not meant for this life. I'm becoming a trad wife. I have to become a trad wife. You're so lucky on when we go on tour. I'm going to change your freaking life because I'm buying you an iPad before we go on tour because I'm not, I'm not dealing with you. Two, I have all the cords, all the headphones, all the chargers, all labeled, all in like as little, anything you need.

It's just going to appear. And I'm getting you a Stanley for the tour. Should I wear the same outfit all of tour? I love how I'm playing it like, dare me to. I feel like you already are planning on wearing the same travel outfit. So what I kind of want to do with my outfits for tour is I kind of want to wear like that sports jersey everywhere. But I think I might save that for my stand-up tour and have more respect for like the Giggly Squad aesthetic.

Like I can do that on my own time. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Because we're going to do like photo shoots. But like be you. I'll be me. But I want to maybe I'll go like a little funky. I would love you to go funky. You know, I love I want you to go baggy. No, I really want to make Giggly Squad tour. Like like I want to wear weird things. Yes. I think we have to be fast. I want to like experiment with like different things. Oh, like what if I just pop out in a wig?

Oh my God, that would be great. Like if you're thinking of getting extensions, you can try it out at Giggly Squad Tour. Like try it out for the night. Like it's a try. How would you describe what the girls should wear to Club Giggly? I feel like it's like something that you have been wanting to wear out, but you're like, no one's going to get it. Or like, he's not going to think I look hot in it. Take a risk. You can take a risk and be like, I want to see if this like looks cool. Yeah.

For me, I want to see ties. I want to see jorts. I want to see sparkles. I want to see capris. I want to see tube tops. I want to see tube tops in the crowd. Anything else you want to see in the crowd? You want to see flowers? No, I don't want to see... No, I mean, I want to just see like...

You want to see effort. Yeah, I just want to see. I want to feel like we all are going to the same function. Like there's nothing worse than feeling like you're overdressed or underdressed. I want no one to feel like they're overdressed because I want everyone to go too hard. They're underdressed either. But if they're just wearing like Giggly Squad merch, which is going to come out soon. Oh, shout out because we had things we were supposed to say.

We're coming out with like a merch drop, but we first wanted to come up with a little teaser merch of like something that was really relevant that we love that you guys were like, we want you to make this into a shirt. So we're going to do that first. And then we're going to have more like Giggly Squad General merch coming out. I feel like we had another announcement too. We added a second Chicago show. You guys, thank you so much for giggling with us. We love you so much. And best of luck surviving this week. And I hope you get a lot of gold medals. No, no.

best of luck best of luck no good luck out there because it's it's been hard recently i don't know why but it downloads some movies yeah wi-fi is real don't forget it also it's august like how is it august already we gotta go goodbye we gotta go bye