Giggling about anxiety, peplum, and trish
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I was going to say what's up my Grammy gigglers, but because I'm losing track of the amount of award shows going on. Yeah.

I have to say. Oh, so wait. What was the G word? Grammy. Like a grandma? Like the Grammys. Okay, sorry. I wasn't following. We're off to a bad start. Let's go again. The Oscars? Yeah. Too much for me. I had three panic attacks. Did you watch the whole start to finish? No. Okay. I was like going to the tennis channel. The second they brought out five people to announce an award, I said, oh, I'm out. Done.

Check, please. See, I was jealous that you had watched all of the... What was the award show before? I watched all of them. All of the Grammys or something. The Grammys were great. And so I was like, you know what? Tonight's my night. I'm going to sit down and I'm going to watch all of the Oscars so that me and Hannah can talk about it tomorrow on Giggly Squad. Jimmy Kimmel comes out. He starts doing his monologue. Next thing I know, I'm waking up and they're announcing Best Picture. And I'm like...

Hold up the phone. I got myself too damn comfy on this couch. Right to sleep. We didn't text at all during it. The Oscars still got my Nielsen TV rating. TV was on the whole time. So I did my due diligence as a good civil servant. Slept through the entire thing. That sounds so peaceful, though. Yeah, so give me the... So I was going back and forth. Jimmy Kimmel, honestly, I feel like he's been doing it for so long. He was like...

what's up guys, I'm back. You're smoking a cigarette. He's like, yeah, it's been a long time. You guys are fucking rich and annoying. Yeah. I think he was good. Like, it was fine. Yeah, I thought it was fine. The John Cena moment was very funny when he walked out naked. Okay. Oh, interesting that you described it as funny. Hot take here. I thought it was so weird. You know what? You're so fucking right about that. And I apologize to the Academy. That was, it was weird. And I was trying to pretend I didn't think it was weird.

Here's the other thing. I'm deep on conspiracy TikTok, like deep, deep, deep. I can't even get out of it. I'm trying to like reroute my algorithm. You're like Amish TikTok, Amish TikTok. I kept getting TikToks of people being like, I think it's weird that John Cena did that because his fan base are young kids.

Yes. So, like, that's weird. Also, if it's weird, like, if it was a woman, that would be so inappropriate. Yeah. And then he's also, like, the tension was weird. And then Jimmy just kept making, like, gay jokes the whole time, like how he wanted to have sex with Ryan Gosling, John Cena. For whatever reason, the Oscars last night were giving me eerie vibes. Like, it was all very eerie. Yeah.

I was like, what's going on? The theater was just big and haunted. Yeah, it was just like, I feel like everyone's off tonight. But let's start off with the fashion. Because you saw the fashion. I actually liked a lot of people's. Oh, because I thought you weren't liking it. No, I actually posted... You were just in a bad mood in the very beginning. Well, I fell asleep. My mood was asleep. I, in fact, missed...

The moment of the show where I could have like gone on my Instagram and been like, I love this, I hate this, but I slept through it. So I wake up this morning, I say, oh, what did Paige think about the fashion? And you just posted a ton of photos with no commentary. Well, I was... And I said, I get it. I was counting sheep. You said, choose your own adventure. Yeah.

What do you think I think about it? I want my Instagram to be interactive. You know, I want it come to play. Were those the looks that you liked or you didn't like? Like, I really did not know what was happening. Okay, well, then I did it correctly. You got beauties in the eye of the beholder. You dumb bitch. No, everything I posted, I liked.

Yes. So I, did you see the Vanity Fair after party looks? Yes, I saw some of them. I loved your best friend, Emily Ratajkowski. Yes. She looked cool. She looked really cool. She's kind of like a better version of my Lord and Savior, Kim Kardashian. Kim Kardashian, it was very similar and Kim Kardashian's didn't hit because it looked like she was poking herself in the chin. A lot of white dresses. A lot of white, a lot of like shiny, light dresses.

Airy mermaid type stuff. I have one hot take. Emily Blunt was wearing a dress called, by the designer, it's called Schiaparelli. Yes. Schiaparelli, whatever. Very Italian. Which McCall was wearing the same designer, Florence Pugh. It had that like, where it was like raised. Everyone loved it.

I didn't love it. I thought it was, I kept wanting to pull it down. Like, I kept wanting to, like, oh. It's giving, like, when you're so stressed out and someone's like, can you just relax your shoulders for a second? You're like, no. I thought it was, like, I thought she looked great. I thought it was, like, I didn't love it, though, as much as everyone was loving it. And I actually didn't like Florence's at all. I liked Florence's. But I think that I like the futuristic type vibe. It was art.

Florence's was pure art. Pure art. I do like anything apocalyptic or futuristic, which does overlap. I just don't like where we are right now in society. It needs to either end or get a little more modern. But yeah, it was giving like spaceship, like if we were all like, there was a gala in Mars. I liked that it looked like wet. Yeah. I liked, okay, it's Anya. Who? Who?

Who's the chess girl? Anya Taylor Smith or something. Oh, the Netflix Queen's Gambit. Queen's Gambit. Yes. Sorry, I'm so afraid to. Sorry, no, I should have gotten that. I should have been better. That was an easy one for me to get from you. But it's not Anna. It's Anya. Okay. It's Anya, I think. Anyway, regardless, that was throwing me for like an hour. So she had a really pretty like...

mermaid type dress. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I kind of remember what she was wearing. But I do have to say what stressed me out is how they all go full glam into another full glam. Yeah. And that was throwing me because I was like, oh my God, you had to change your hair and the outfit. But is that like your dream night? Like that's what you wake up and you go one day I'll have three outfits in one night.

Actually, I would like be, I feel like if I was at the Oscars and I knew I had a second look coming, I'd be like giddy to be like, wait till y'all see my fucking second look though. See, at my own wedding, I changed to a second look and Paige was too blackout. And I said, Paige, what do you think of this? And she's like, what? And I'm like, it's my second look. And she was like, move over. I'm getting a spiced martini. I was drinking whiskey sours that night and I haven't ever drank a whiskey sour again after that night.

Rest in peace to Whiskey Sour. Wait, there was one more thing I was going to say about the Oscars and now I can't. I do think they were good at like the speeches weren't too long. But I'll be honest, I was really flipping around the channels. It couldn't, it was too regal and it took too long for people to walk up to the mic from the back. And in that time, I'm like, I'm already on to the next thing in my head. Any celebrities that presented that you were like, oh, there's so-and-so? Yeah.

J-Law, Jennifer Lawrence, she's really coming with a whole new aesthetic. She's very much giving like 1950s housewife. Yes. Like in a modern way. And I feel because I'm...

An outgoing silly girly. Yeah. I feel like she's consciously trying to not smile too goofy. She's trying to give respect to the fashion community. Yeah. And she's trying to be like, I'm different now. I'm very. And I know what that is because I'll do that in social settings. I'll come in in the first five minutes. I'm like, I'm regal. I have a lot of thoughts that you'll never know. I might have an accent. Ten minutes in, I'm like, you know what's fucking crazy, guys? You're laughing so hard that we can see the back of your molars. Yeah.

I'm puking, shitting, throwing up. And they're like, where is that? So that's what she gives me when she walks into the shows. Yeah, she gives that she always wants to burst out laughing. But she's holding it in and she's like, I'm dainty. Yeah. I'm so cool. I also loved... Oh, and Des' friend won. Oh my God, Killian. So fun. It is crazy. So Des is like... I didn't realize how close they were, but like... Wait, they...

They went to college together. Okay. And, like, that's, like, such a boys thing. They're just like, well, we're boys for life now. And they just... Craig does that. Like, Craig's like, yeah. Like, Steven and I have known each other since we were 12. He's my fucking guy. We, like, met at a gas station. Now we're fucking... He's gonna be in my wedding. It's like, okay, you don't even know his mom's name. He asked me for the time once in the middle of the city. So, yeah.

It's just so interesting to see someone like win an Oscar. He was like, you know, an Oscar winner. And I'm like, yeah, it is crazy. No, that's insane. But also like part of me now that I know more about the industry, the more I feel like it's all such like smoke and mirrors. Not Killian's acting and anything, but in just in general, like the politics of it all. Yeah, because I feel like there this is like, wow.

This is going to get deep for a second. Like, in a high way, not like an emotional way. Then I lost my train of thought. That was the most high shit I've ever heard. You guys, I have to tell you something. It's going to be really high. And I forgot. Thank you.

No, I was going to say, like, it's funny that you, like, meet certain celebrities now because there's, like, a certain amount of degrees of separation. And then it, like, humanizes them. Yes. But I feel like that's the same in anything. Like, even in, like, the workplace where you're like, oh, I'm afraid of my boss. But then, like, when you hang out with your boss for 10 minutes, you're like, oh, he's a fucking idiot. Like, do you know what I mean?

You know what I mean? No, I know. Where it's like, oh, everything becomes so, like, humanized. I was taught—I went on all these long drives this weekend with— Are you okay? No, I'm not. With Tracy Carnazzo. Shout out, Tracy. My opener. We had to drive to West Virginia. It took five hours. And at one point I said— Wait, you drove from New York to West Virginia? Yeah, because you could fly to D.C., but then you have to drive, like—

A couple hours. Three hours. And we were like, let's just drive five. West Virginia doesn't have an airport? What's going on? It wasn't. Where we were going. Okay. Where we were going, there was no. I wore my hunting outfit because I wanted to appreciate the culture. No, I saw that. They loved it. That was really nice of you to do when you were going to their homeland. But you know, I've been wanting to wear it like every show and now I'm like, I have to. But yeah, we were talking just about like.

Whenever it's like human nature, whenever you're doing something, you then chase the next thing. Yeah. And people can talk about like, no, you just have to enjoy the journey. And you do. You do enjoy the journey. But it is...

just human nature to like want to you have to keep living you have to keep being curious and excited and what's next like 10 years ago if we told ourselves like okay and this week for work you have to do this this this and this we'd be like wait that's so cool but like now that it's us we're like I'm exhausted I'm like I can't rate red carpet looks I'm not cool

I couldn't even put a caption on my Insta stories. I can't do an Instagram story right now at 7 p.m. on a Sunday. Get a grip. I actually thought about that with Emily DiDonato, the model. Yeah. She posted that she had two kids. She went to the suburbs. And now she's back working. And she posted that she had this like crazy work day of like nine hours shooting. And she goes, back then I'd be stressed about it. Yeah. But now that I have kids, this feels like a vacation. And I was like, oh my God, your mind is so crazy. Yeah.

I saw a TikTok the other day and it was like when you're talking to yourself in your head, like you're going throughout your day, you're talking to a voice in your head. Yes. Do you think of that voice as you or do you think of that voice as someone else?

Okay. Wait, it's crazy we're talking about this because I have to admit something, you guys. I had a really bad anxiety attack yesterday slash this morning. Well, what is it? I never do. Just this morning. No, now I'm going to cry. Are you? Kristen, we not just talk about imagine if we cried on Giggly Squad and we both started laughing? Wait, like you had a legit panic attack? Yeah, and I never do. Like as in physically you started freaking out? Yeah, and then I started fighting with my mind and my mind won. Okay.

mean to bring this up. It was literally like a TikTok. I was like, this would be fun to ask. This is so weird. I'm not kidding. We're so connected. I just can't. What was it about? I tried to pretend I was normal. Is that why you're wearing a bow? Yeah. It does call me. It's like, you're going to tell the gigglers about your panic attack. And I was like, I don't know. If it comes out. If it comes out.

But then I'm sitting here and I'm like, I have to tell them. I'm like, I saw a TikTok. You're like, fine, I'll tell you everything. I'm like, okay, well. No, so... Wait, about, like, what? No, you know what happened? I think I've just... I've been, like, working really hard, obviously. And I... The weight of the fact that I'm shooting a special in two weeks, I think I've been really suppressing it. Like, I actually... Well, that's how I cope with stuff. Right. Like, the second I think about something, then it's a problem. But as long as I don't, like...

worry about it. I just like wing my way through life, fling my way. Yeah. You know what I'm trying to say? So then I like became aware this weekend that I'm shooting a Netflix special. This is why you were taking long drives. Wait, last night. So where are you when you start like diabolically fighting with your own brain? Um, well, I got, if you want to talk about, I got back on Sunday and I just was like

In my own head a little bit. Yeah. And then you, like, you know when you get, like, hooked on some thoughts that you're like, that's not real. Yeah. But, like, in my head I'm like, this is not you. That's anxiety. You're just nervous. I'm just nervous. But, Hannah. But I'm never nervous. But this is, like...

One, I had someone tell me, and this really helped, when you're doing a job like this and you're nervous, you should take it as a compliment because you care about it. So you're nervous because you want to do well because you care about it. But anyone would be nervous. This is huge. No, but I literally was—I'm never nervous. The stage is where I'm my most calm. So then when I was thinking about it and I was just like, okay, now you have to—it's filmed, it's permanent, all this stuff.

And Des was like, I was worried that you weren't getting nervous. Thank God you got nervous. Yeah. But I like, I'm sitting at home and then I posted this thing last night and the gigglers were messaging me because they were like, okay, it's Sunday night. Like calm down. Did you post a quote? I posted a quote. Oh my God, I can't believe I didn't see. The one time I take a nap. The one time. The thousand time I take a nap, something really happened.

No, this is fucked up. You guys, this is fucked up. I can't even say it. No. Okay. Let me read it. I'll read it. Okay. The portal to every next... No, let it out. This is so bad. This is a mental health moment. You know what? Take back what we said. Sometimes you have to quote. I don't know. Let it out. I

These are emotions in your body. Now you sound like a reality TV producer. What's the root of this, though? She goes, just save it for camera. Are you having a bad time at home? We're not at home. Do you want to curse anyone out that's near you? Okay, this is fucked up. The portal to every next level is through the parts of yourself that you avoid. Need we say more? Need we say more? Thank you, Brene Brown.

This girl goes, no, people were just messaging me like, okay, like, thanks for ruining my Sunday. And I was like, well, if mine's going to be ruined, so is yours. No, it is true, though. Like, I feel like the only way you elevate is like when you're uncomfortable and then you tackled that and you're dead. Here's the other thing, Hannah.

What is like your biggest fear? Say your biggest fear comes true and you do this special and it sucks and everyone's like, it fucking sucks. Hannah's stupid. Literally something will happen two weeks later and then we'll sue Netflix and we'll make them take it off their platform. You know, like I'll go there with a pitchfork. No, I love you so much. I think Giggly Squad has brought me like out of actually, okay, now it's a whole thing. I'm sorry. Grace's sister is here and it's like, this is embarrassing.

But it's fine. We never cry. I mean, I didn't cry, obviously. But... You're like, can you cry outside? That's disgusting. No, Giggly Squad... Removing the podcast out of comedy and into health and wellness. It gets moved today.

So, yeah, when I was going through a really dark time, I think every two years I have to have a mental break. You know? It's part of growth. So, like, I was having a really hard time and Giggly Squad kept me through it because whatever was going on, I could sit there and, like, pretend that, like, my world was just me and you joking. Everything was fine. Yeah.

And I do think that comedy has been like my safe space. So then like feeling suddenly like, oh my God, I have something important with the one thing that is my like solace and my like joy. It was like getting me stressed the fuck out. And I feel like I'm more of a depressed person where I'll suppress and then just sleep. Yeah. I feel like you actually cope with anxiety more than me. Like you're good at like, like you'll have a bad time. I've been thinking about it all day.

Okay. I'm glad that we're here because I'll have a normal anxiety and then I convince myself that I've lost control of my brain. Okay. And I'm never going to get it back. Okay. And I need to call 911. Okay. But it doesn't happen very often. Yeah. But every two years. And you're like, I'm going crazy. So like the last 48 hours have been a nightmare. You're like, I'm losing it. If I sound like a dainty, hurt bird...

That's what I am right now. You don't sound like a dainty hurt bird, but it's okay to feel. If I'm like really dainty and shy, it's because I'm going through something right now. Back to my original question.

When you hear the voice in your head, don't jump. Okay? That's what we're going to say first. So when you hear a voice in your head, so like in the past 48 hours, do you think of that voice who's saying all these things to make you nervous? Do you think of that voice as you or do you think of it as someone else? So you're not supposed to think that it's you. Right. And there are, I think that you have multiple voices in your head.

Well, I certainly do. Yes. Yes. And like I've told myself, like the voices in your head are like like something a kid said to you when you were younger that pissed you off. Something a parent said that might have made you question things. Something a coach said. It's the media. Like it's other voices that you've accumulated. Like, you know, when we're little and we have no worries, then society hits us. Right. So there are certain voices that I'm really good at being like, OK, I don't believe you anymore.

And then like this particular voice is one that like I've been suppressing. That you haven't even like acknowledged. I don't even acknowledge her because like that's, I don't know her. Yeah. And this bitch came walking to my door during the Oscars. On a Sunday evening. On a Sunday evening. And was like, Hannah? And you know when you feel her and you're like, and you feel a sensation you haven't felt for a while and you go, oh no.

I don't want to do this dance. Okay, so when I heard that, first of all, I want to preface that I've been in therapy for like 10 fucking years of my life and I've never had anyone put it like this. When I first heard that, when I think of the voice in my head, I think of it as like, that's me. That's my ally. Like, that's who I am. That's your conscious, like, speaking up. Yeah, that's like my gut being like, don't do this, don't do this. And I'm like, oh, yeah, she's right. Mm-hmm.

Well, you're supposed to listen to your gut, but not your anxiety thoughts. They sound the same. Right. It's like, trust your intuition, but it's like, she's crazy. Have you ever fucking met her? Let her be in your head for two minutes. So I did an insane journaling exercise yesterday. Yeah. Where I talked about the voice. I said, she's mean. Writing it down. I said, she's a bitch. I said, she's a ugly little slut. She shouldn't be trusted. She shouldn't be trusted. She made out with a hot dog. She's too fazed.

But I was like writing basically like, fuck you bitch. No, I had a mental breakdown. I told you guys I feel better. I'm over here sending voice notes being like, how many pushups do you think you could realistically do? Actually, when you sent me that, I was still okay. I hadn't had my breakdown yet. Oh my God. But anyway, so yeah, I'm going through a little bit of an anxious moment right now. Okay.

I just think it's important for the gigglers to know because I think that I've worked really hard to have confidence and belief in myself and at the end of the day just be true to yourself. But I do have like, I think I have a disorder. You don't have a disorder. You're being a human and you're filming a Netflix stand-up show that not even less people understand.

I mean, I can't I don't even know how to put it, but like no one gets to do this. You're so right. And like, logically, that's so right. But then you just like you're like, OK, then can we stop freaking out? And then your body's like, oh, no, we already started. The party started. Here's the other thing.

Not that I'm, like, a connoisseur or, like, you know, the academy. I've heard your hour. It's fucking hilarious. No. Like, it's not like you're going to— It's not about the—like, I am so confident in the hour. Right. It's just— The doing it? Just— The whole thing. Everything just hit me. Like, a physical reaction of, like, you know, the heart and the, like— And you're just like, okay. I feel like it's also probably a little shocking, like—

Two, because it's like, okay, here's the thing that I'm like, I started in this career and I always wanted to get to this point, but I never actually like thought about this moment because I'm like, oh, that's what I'm working for. And now you're here. Yeah. So that's got to be like, wait, I did it. Like now what? Yeah. And I also think I do suffer from anxiety. You suffer from anxiety. And I think a lot of people that suffer from bad anxiety will

like veer away from things. We're like, I don't know, there's something about us where we like lean into the fear. And I always like to try to do difficult things and challenge myself. But no, I just had a little moment. Yeah. And I wanted to let the gigglers know that

But I do think the voice is like not logical and it makes no sense. So mental health moment. Whoever's talking to you all day in your head, tell her to shut the fuck up. But the problem is when you start telling them to stop, then you're like obsessed with them stopping. This morning is the first morning where I was like doing something and I was like, okay, well...

I was just taught that, like, that's not even me. And then I felt sad because I was like, wait, but this whole time, like, I thought it was us. We're just, like, doing life and, like, you're helping me. And then I realized, like, no, I'm by myself just trying to figure it out. I always say your brain is like a toxic roommate.

That, like, is there and you can choose to fuck with her and fight with her or you can be like, you're not healthy for me. The trickery. I'm shutting the door. We have to do taxes and also worry about our brains. Like, it's too much. And I do think it's a culmination of, like, a lot of things where...

I think I've been running on like zero. Yeah, I feel like, not to sound like Selena Gomez, but like exhaustion is real. Like no, like burnout is real. Whenever I hear the like celebrities, you know, they're like in the hospital from a tour and you're like, okay, that's dramatic. No. That's dramatic. So dramatic. You're singing some songs that's dramatic. Stop vaping, you know? Stop drinking Diet Coke all the time and drink a water. I think there's a lot of...

pressure and a lot of stress that could like and I'm I was like really I think I was just compartmentalizing it that was a really hard well I feel like anyone can get like exhaustion and like burnout because it's all mental it's not like we're yeah no we're not waking up at 8 a.m and doing like a labor intensive job I mean my lower back was hurting me from but that's we do a lot of flying I do a lot of flying but I think like mentally you can burn out from any job

Because you're just overthinking, overthinking. Yes. So, yeah, it's literally just overthinking. So, like, the problem is I'm just, like, really, really, really smart. Yeah. So I'm like, I can see this from a hundred different perspectives in a millisecond. And then your brain goes like... And then you're like... I wish sometimes I was dumber. And that's crazy. Ignorance is bliss is a real thing. But also we're not that smart, which is the funniest part about it all. But I do have to say...

I'm happy I'm speaking about it because I feel like a lot of these, like, top performers or top athletes, they have to be viewed as perfect and strong so they don't speak about it. Right. Like, I—but you'll see them in the hospital and you're like, what happened? They're like, oh, they had a stomach problem. I'm like, okay. Right. Like, not showing weakness. Yeah. Or they'll lie about stuff. Right. Where it's like, I think that—

when they have a big thing coming up, they do battle some nerves in different ways. Like everyone has different ways. Yeah. But yeah. So anyway, I'm trying to survive these streets. Okay, well. I love how I said I got in a fight with my brain and I lost. Literally? At the end of the night, I was like, okay, you've lost this battle. I'm going to go to sleep and I'll fight with you again in the morning. Do you ever feel that way?

I just can't believe you started crying on the pod. That's the first time we've ever done that. Like, I was thrown for a second. I thought it was a bit we were doing. No, also, I haven't cried in a long time. Chris, can you support me? Hannah, you want to know why this is so crazy? We are so mentally... We're so connected. It's actually scary. I was just saying to someone, wow, I haven't cried since November. Yeah.

Was it you, Grace? Yeah, it was. Okay, don't talk to HR about that. That seems invasive. I'm just like, Grace!

And I cried this weekend. I cried all day on Saturday. Okay. Okay, that sounds way worse than what happened to me. But was it like a good cry? Yeah, no. It was like I got... Like I saw my mom and I was just like, I haven't seen you in so long. And also like my life. And she was like, okay, let it out. But that's really therapeutic. It was a therapeutic cry. I was just like, help me. Well, actually, I was talking to my mom on the phone and I was crying. And she was like...

Do you want me to come? Yeah. My mom lives hours away. Yeah. And I was like...

Maybe. No. But I remember when I was living in Queens, when I was like 28 or 29, every week I'd have to go over to see her because I would feel like anxiety building up. Yes. And then I'd show up to dinner and I'd just sit there and eat and be like, thank you. And then I'd feel better. I was crying. I think I just haven't seen my mom. No, I'm crying to my mom this weekend, right? And she goes, well, you do this to yourself. You know you can't go two months without seeing me. And I'm like, no.

it's too long. And you

And you know what? Some of you guys are like, you guys are fucking babies. Grow up. Everyone has their coping mechanisms. No, I also don't care because I'm going to be 75 and literally like, I don't know what I'm going to be doing, but I'm going to want my fucking mom. Like you always want your mom at any age when you're like in distress. Yeah, it's human nature. Also, I know things were going bad yesterday. Wait, look at Kate Middleton. She's literally going missing. And you want to know who they see driving up to the palace? Her fucking mom.

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What's going on with the Kate Middleton editing? Because I can't find the photo. What are they talking about? Okay, so the palace. I was telling you about it. So you were out for 48 hours. You were on psychiatric hold. All I know is I posted my Thai journalist investigative report on Kate Middleton and everything went around. No, everything went crazy. So the...

I was going to say the White House. The palace sent a photo of Kate and her kids because it was their mother's day in England the other day.

They sent a photo like, look at Kate and her kids. And the Associated Press set like gets that photo and then sends it out to all of their outlets. And then those outlets are allowed to use that photo. The Associated Press took the photo off of their website and said, we can't endorse this photo because it has been altered too much.

And so people were like, what's altered about it? It was clearly. So then it was like, obviously, that's an AI photo. That's like not real that they were just like, here's a photo. So then when they took it off, Kate had to be like, as an. This is like the craziest response. As an amateur photographer. And it's like, what? I've like. Did she take a selfie? So she didn't even take the photo. Like I play around with editing. It's like, OK, no, that's not it. So something's going on.

A lot of people are like, oh, maybe she was pregnant, had a miscarriage, or like this was a scheduled stomach surgery. Maybe she really is just recovering. They said you're not going to see her till Easter anyway. I personally think something's going on with her husband, like her and her husband, because she wasn't wearing her wedding ring in the AI photo. But that's why wouldn't they put the wedding ring if it's a fucking AI photo? I don't know what's going on over there.

I also like even if she had surgery, like it's not the end of the world for people to see you. They also there was something where it was like the day she had her surgery, like they went at night after an event and they had like a car that they saw like going to the hospital. But then they never saw her leave the house. It's like all weird. And then other people are like, OK, well, she doesn't want to like be around for two months. Let her not be around for two months. I'm like, OK.

I want to hear Meghan Markle's thoughts. No, I was just going to say, you know who's... Get her on Oprah right now. She has a podcast. Oh. Or she just signed, like, a big deal for one. She's probably in L.A. being like, oh, so I'm not the whole problem. But also, like, can we normalize disappearing? I bet. Me? It's like, um,

I have a new bill to pass. You can disappear for a couple days. Well, that's what J-Law did. That's what Anne Hathaway did. Yeah. No, honestly, it'd be so shit. It's shit. Because you have a husband. You can, like, disappear. Even if you don't have a husband, you could disappear. Okay, I'll come. Okay. Actually, like, J-Law doesn't have an Instagram. Someone else doesn't have an Instagram. And I was like, ooh, that's fucking cool.

Yeah, but... But I have... I'm addicted to posting and I love my Instagram. What do you think is going to happen if TikTok legit gets banned? Like, where am I going to get my... Oh, my God. I was compartmentalizing that. All my knowledge. I was compartmentalizing that. I've diagnosed myself with, like, three different things this weekend. Like, how? I'm... Don't... Everyone keeps telling me it's not going to happen, so I'm just not even thinking about it. But also, like...

Everyone's about like free speech and then you're like taking away something that's giving free speech. I'm not getting into the drama at all, but like. That was so political. I know. This is a mental health political podcast.

Wait, I know it was really bad yesterday because I Googled how to process an emotion. Hannah. Hannah, like how to speed up the fucking process. It's not a cake that you're putting in. I was like, maybe I don't know how to process emotion. So I Googled it and I was literally trying to read like, okay, how do we process emotions?

And I was like, what is an emotion? I would love to know what Google said. I blacked out. Like, I was... I couldn't... Actually, let's see what they said. Here's the other thing. I feel like I can't process emotions because I can never identify what emotion I'm feeling. Yeah. Because they said, how do you feel about it? And I'm like, I don't know. This is why... The first thing it says, draw how you're feeling. I said, fuck this. That's...

Make a gratitude list. Punch a pillow. Okay, Gary. Okay, toxic masculinity. Scream. Let yourself cry. I said check. Rip paper into small pieces. That would annoy the shit out of me. I wouldn't like that. Because then you just have to clean it up. It's basically make a mess and clean it. Vent. Okay, that's what I'm doing. Gossip. I'm gossiping. So anyway. Get a voodoo doll. The one thing that helped me in my darkest time was...

I'm being so dramatic. I'm sorry. No, I love it. Is that nothing is stagnant? Yeah. Time is a construct. Time is a construct. But like however you feel, it never stays the same. And I think anxiety stems from you thinking it's going to last forever. Bad times don't last, but neither do the good times. Nothing lasts forever, including us and existence. Strong people know what is an issue, and I can't even think of it. Ignorance is bliss.

Okay, what the fuck else did I write? Oh, I have an update. Yeah. First of all, we were calling Trish Cyrus. It's Tish. Trish is better. Here's the other thing. Tish is Trish. That's the same person. Like, come on. Oh, yeah. Someone said it's... Okay. Oh.

Tish is short for Patricia. Your mom said that. She said we were all so idiots. She's like, sorry. She didn't such a mom. She's like, sorry. I thought that was common knowledge. I thought I raised you better. So Patricia should be Trish, not Tish. Because then it's Patricia. Right. That's just grown up. That's the same name. So we apologize about that, but like...

I feel like that hasn't gotten better, that drama. That hasn't gotten better. No one said anything. Everyone's like freaked out about it. The silence is deafening. Someone, I think it was Teffy, was like, can someone just, can you speak up, Trish? Yeah, just say you didn't. Just say something. Yeah, say one thing. Because now it's getting bad. But this is the thing, Zaddy's, I get it. I get it. Yeah, but also like.

Here's what I always like to do in, well, because I have to do it because I have a boyfriend, so you have to explain things at a fourth grade level. Okay, that'd be like if I, you know, like how you have to put it. Wait, that happens so much with the male brain where you have to be like, okay, imagine if I did this to you. I'm like, okay, here's a blank piece of paper. I'm going to, this, I'm here, okay?

So like I always try and do that and like when I think about this. You do it with snacks. I'm like this cheese it's me. Okay. Someone goes. Make eye contact. Keep eye contact. Doing the tish trish thing like with my own mom. I'm trying to like put it into perspective. I would beat my mom's ass I feel like. I'd be like stop. Well it also. Like you're embarrassing me. Well this is the difficult thing. I want my mom to think.

that my man is attractive. Because if your mom thinks your man's ugly, that's embarrassing. Yeah, but not to this level. But not to that level. Also, just, there's no boundaries, there's no respect. I wonder who made the first move. But regardless, if he made a move on her, I'd be like, if I was the mom, if I was Trish, you made a move on me, I'd be like, okay...

First of all, my name is Tish. Second of all, like, that's creepy. And then I call my daughter and be like, your man is a creep. He's hitting on me. Yeah. And, like, there's just more. There's so many men in the world, you guys. There's so many. No, literally. Like, there's too many. There's too many men. No, there actually is. We should start something. And every time I've ever been annoyed at a man, I literally just remember. Why are you guys laughing?

You go, this is my high thought of the day. Maybe we should start something. You don't want me to start something. Okay. I won't start it, but I'll shut it down. Speaking of start something, I'll end it. Oh, I'll end some shit. I thought of doing a meditation app. Wow. Did you call Melissa Wood Help too this weekend? I was just close. I was DMing Melissa. Hello, it's an emergency. Melissa Wood Help. You said you'd be there when you need me.

No, do you know who I did call? JG Whatmore. Gabby Bernstein. And we did tapping. If you Google do yoga retreat, that's when I'm really going to call your mom. I mean, you've told me you wanted a silent meditation retreat. I've never done silent. Okay, so when I'm going through a hard time, it's weird. I'm not trying to compare our traumas. But I do have to say, so I turned on a YouTube. Meditation.

And that shit is so corny. Like, I started laughing because it's like, you are everything the universe wants you to be. So I think what I'm going to do when I get out of this, because I'm still in it. Yeah. I'm deep in it. Yeah, you're here. When I get out and I'm feeling free again, I'm going to do a meditation app of, like, what you, like, normal, like, or, like, kind of funny. Yeah. Yeah, like, it's not that bad. Your brain is lying to you. She's a cunt.

And you're also going to start a rap career? You're that bitch. Hannah, I love this. Our Patreon's just us meditating, just doing guided meditations, but it's just, like, so stupid. I feel like Giggly Squad is a guided meditation. It's like us making a Nutella sandwich, and we're like, this calms us down. You grab a slice of bread and... The problem is the more you try to calm yourself down, the more it makes you not calm. The last time I had a panic attack was...

like a like a legit panic attack and it was from my own brain was the night before I was supposed to leave for Mexico with Craig and I like legitimately convinced myself I was getting kidnapped and I had a full-on panic attack and I called him in the middle of the night I was like I can't go like I can't physically leave my apartment and he was like calm down you know like just don't think about it you're gonna be fine

I'm like, yeah, that worked. I got to go. He goes, I just beat up every kidnapper in Mexico. Also, you've never been kidnapped and you're 31. So I think your time's over. So how long did it take you to feel better? Like how long did it take me to come out of like that physical situation? Probably like a couple of minutes. But like mentally, probably like 48 hours. Yeah. So that's where I'm at right now. Because then you're just like your energy is like low because you actually just used so much.

Okay, I have an update on my period, everyone. Oh, yeah. Update on my menstrual cycle. Is the period in the room with us? Because you don't have her. Certainly not. I went to my doctor. Here's the other thing. Sometimes doctors, like, I almost feel like it's a bit. Yeah. Like, I'm like, wait a minute. Are you tricking me? Because she came in. She's the nicest, honestly. And she was like, yeah, like, um...

we don't know what's going on. What do you think is going on? I'm like, I don't know what's going on. That's why I'm here. That's why I signed in, gave you my insurance card, and I sat here and waited because I don't know what's happening. And she was like...

I know you don't want to go back on the pill, but to get your period again, we can either do one of two options. Give you this antibiotic that you take for seven days that like induces your period or you can try this vitamin and it's like not like the other pill, I guess, is like for people that are like trying to get pregnant. So you like get really fertile, but also this vitamin is too. So like that's kind of freaking me out a little bit.

I just ordered it on Amazon. I haven't taken it yet because I'm like scared a little bit. Also, the fact you can get it on Amazon freaks me out a little bit. No. And then I was like, okay, like how do I take it? Like what do I do? And she was like, I was like, how long do I take it for? And she was like, oh.

like forever and I'm like wait what's happening and then she gave me like a pamphlet she's like you can read about it this and I was like I don't want to go to medical school like that's why I'm here didn't you read about it no I go give me a fucking spark notes right now I'm like I don't know this is because we don't know enough about the woman's body no we don't know anything about it and I'm like okay so what is even happening up there like should I go get an ultrasound she's like no I don't

oh, I don't think you need one. Like, just take this for a couple days, see what happens. No, growing up is realizing the doctors actually don't know anything. Yeah. And sometimes you have to, like, go to multiple doctors. And I feel like there's a lot of OBGYNs that are gigglers and just, like, a lot of, like, smart people. So she told me to take this vitamin called berberine. Berberine?

Burberry. I'm like, I love that store. She's like, take a bunch, eat a bunch of blueberries. Go to Soho, go to Burberry and just get a purse. So I don't know. I have to see. I was obviously on ZocDoc looking for doctors. Yeah.

I didn't know what it was. I've done that one time, too. And I've emailed. I'm like, it's an emergency. Can I please make an appointment for this week? And they, like, immediately got back to me. And they were like, if it's a real emergency, go to the hospital. I'm like, okay, that's dramatic. I just want to, like, be. Now you're projecting. I just want to, like, see if I could get an Oscar. Like, yeah. No, so what happened is I searched for just, I'm like, doctor New York City and doc doc with my insurance.

The first girl that pops up is a girl that I went to high school with. And I said, absolutely not. And I go, oh, my God, am I the age where my friends are now doctors? No. And then I was like, I know this bitch. She's not OK. No, it's that. It's really scary. Because you realize that doctors are humans. I know this girl. Yeah.

She should not be a doctor. I literally, not that I'm ageist at all, especially not to my own fucking age. I like was in like a work thing and I was like, are we sure she can do it? She's like in her early 30s. And then I was like, oh my God, people say that about me. Like, and I was like, I take that back. Obviously she is qualified for this job. Like I would be also. Well, you're becoming aware of your own ageism and misogyny internally. And here we are. We're growing. We're learning. We're growing. We're learning. We're changing. Um, yeah.

Just like my French nail bed that's been growing. Hannah, we have the same nails right now, honestly. I'm no nail polish. I did no nail polish for two weeks. It looks cute. I'm just trying to get them somewhere. Yeah. Get them to a space where they're comfortable. Same. One thing I learned recently is that clothes...

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I actually don't, no. It gives me the ick. No, I'm giving myself the ick. No, you're not giving me the ick. It's not that I don't like you and you're weak. I'm not used to you being weak. Like, I feel like... I'm going to cry. I feel like you're someone that... You're the one that was holding us up. What are we going to do now? I'm like, okay, well, now we have no foundation. We're staring at a ship. I'm like, it's giggling. What's happening? You don't have to leave because I have a lot of responsibility to handle it.

Well, I'm glad you feel better after this because my anxiety is sky high. Okay? Everything's going to come crumbling down. I go, oof, this has been great. I feel good now. I do this, honestly, I just trauma, I think I trauma dumped on you guys and I apologize. No, that's what it's for. Let it out. Put it in the book. But do you ever like leave a conversation and you're like, oh, now I just caused all these issues in their life and I'm leaving. No. More like my mom. Like my mom's having a great day and I go, oof, and she's like, what? And I'm like, ah. No. And then I'm like, thanks, mom.

Sometimes I'll call my mom and try and be like, I'm like, be an adult. You know what? Don't put this on her. She's got so much. And you're like, what's going on? You're like, what's going on with you? And she's like, Paige, you okay? And you're like, okay, really not. And this part of it was like, hi. And I go, how are you? I just started telling a story that I was just like,

Wait, but don't you feel like, like, okay, if I were to have done this and, like, called my mom crying, I'm like, I'm just, like, really stressed out. Like, in high school or college, my parents would have been like, okay, like, you can feel sorry for yourself for an hour. Get it together. Now that I'm older, though, it's almost like they're more like...

My dad treats me with, like, literal kindergarten gloves. He's like, are you—how are your emotions today? Are you feeling stressed? Anyway, I wrote about peplums. I wrote, no peplum, please.

No. I'm so into the peplum. I'm very excited it's coming back. I think it's very cutesy. Okay, that's where me and you differ because you want it cutesy. I don't like when things are too cutesy unless it's a bow that you're then like ironically wearing. Like I'm wearing a bow. Okay, but I'm going to tell you something. Did you see Gabrielle Union, her outfit for the Oscars? Yes. Okay, not...

A peplum where it like poofed out, but like longer top, longer pants. I feel like you would look very good in that style. Not to argue with you, and I totally respect your opinions. Yeah. My torso is so long. Yeah. When I wear a long shirt, it looks like, I look like Winnie the Pooh. But what if you're wearing like a flare longer pant? Maybe. I do like the idea of peplum because you can bloat.

100%. It's made by someone who bloated. It was made by me. A bloater. A bloater. Yeah. But I don't, I kind of like to show my waist. Yeah, you like to cinch it up. Because then I feel like I lose stuff. I just feel like peplum is not feminist. It's homophobic. It's homophobic. Also, it's...

Just calling things homophobic that like clearly can't be anything is my favorite trend on TikTok. I realize my sunglasses are slanted.

on my face. And then I was like, are my sunglasses cheap? Because they definitely were not made with love. Right. They were like $3. You're in a fragile state. I'm in a fragile state. I hate saying this. Could your ears be off? Could your head be off? And because I'm in a fragile state, that's the first thing I thought of. I said, you know what? It's you because you've been the issue this whole time.

And I think my ears are off. Really? I think my ears are off. I just, I don't think they are. But I feel like I've never seen you with a not-scented sunglasses. Wait, so every time I wear sunglasses, you're like, that's tilted.

I think like a smidge. It's like basically your ears and my orbital bone are fucking everyone's day up. No, and then it doesn't match with my widowspeak. That's supposed to be centered. I think my ears are, one of them is a little higher. So we're going to have to do custom Chanel shades. Or just live this slanted life that we lead. Wow. What else is going on? I mean, what else is going on? I feel like.

Courtney and Kendra? Oh, I wrote down Courtney and Kendra, but that was supposed to go in the Tish Trish thing because it's like, that's also the same name. Oh, Courtney and Kendra, the same name. Yeah, like that's the same person. Amanda and Chelsea, that's the same person. Oh, yeah, like Jennifer and Stephanie. Yeah, what do you think is like the Hannah? The Hannah.

I feel like Paige and Sophia, that's the same person. That's the same person. Paige and Jennifer to me are similar. Oh, so rude. Do you ever meet someone and they tell you their name and you go, that's not your name? All the time. And then, so I... Like Grace now is not in my head, not Grace. It's Grace Battle. Oh, Grace Battle. Like I can't say... No, but you know when like this girl's name is...

Brooke. But I fully introduced her to everyone as Chloe. And that sounds better. Her name is Chloe. That girl looks like a Chloe. And she goes, my name's Brooke. And I go...

Not to me. You know, once your brain decides it. And then later on, I just kept being like, clerk book. And you're like, here's the thing. Me and my brain right now, enemies. And she's telling me Chloe. And I really can't go with anything different right now. I'm in a fragile state. I can't speak back to her right now. She's in full control. Sorry, we're not speaking at the moment. And that wasn't me. That was my brain. But yeah, I will. Once I decide someone's like name is not their name, I can't see them as their name like ever. Yeah.

But sometimes parents make mistakes. Yeah, like people like it's like the same when you have someone in your phone as like, oh, where you met them. Then like in your head, you're like, that's Matt Bodega. Yes. And that's just his name. Or you misspell his name on your phone and you're like, he's misspelling his name on Instagram. Right. It is very difficult to when like, I don't know, like Austin Kroll in my phone will always be Austin spelt.

The correct way. To me, he's always Krill the Warrior King. Yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah. Some people are like their Instagram names. Yeah. Like my friend Dominique. She's Dom Chacha. But she recently changed her Instagram name to like her first and last name. And you go, unfollow. And for the first time, I was like, how the fuck do you spell your last name? I was like, that's insane. Oh, well, she's Polish. That's like, that's. And like in, like when I talk about her to my brother, I say Dom Chacha. Dom Chacha.

Obviously. Yeah. I remember when I took, I decided to make a stylistic decision with my A's.

Everyone goes through that. Did everyone experience this? Everyone in middle school is like, what if I did it like this? Yes! I changed. I actually rebranded. I actually rebranded. Wait. Does everyone do that? I feel like in like sixth, seventh grade, you're like, I'm a woman and my A's go like this. You stopped like harding your I's and you're like, I'm a fucking adult. I'm practically in college. You harded every I. Every I.

Couldn't get through a goddamn test. They're like, you can stop doing that. I'm like, it's adorable and my name has an I in it. I'm not going to miss out on this opportunity. You know what's sad? Because these days are not writing in notebooks. Are they not?

Like in college, you guys aren't. Oh, you are? Well, you're a hippie. She's writing. She loves the environment. She goes, I'm attached to the earth right now. She's like, I have a farm. I'm friends with the Amish. It's funny because there's this one thing about me that no one would ever guess.

This is my fun fact. I have horrible handwriting. Like, the worst. Like, nobody, every time someone sees something that I wrote, they go, you didn't write that. Wait, that's so upsetting. It's so upsetting. You feel like they see this part of you that you've been hiding. Yeah, they're like, wait, what?

That's so not like your aesthetic. I'm like, I know, whatever. Just like go with it. And I saw like my uncle like retired and he had all these cards on the table that people wrote. But I just kept looking at everyone's handwriting and I was like, oh my God, this is calligraphy. Have you ever seen someone you don't really like and then you see their handwriting and you go, I take back all the bad things I've ever said about you. I respect you so much. That's how I feel like when they write something and they use like the wrong words.

Yeah. Like, there. I'm like, oh. Do you know what's a canon event? Seeing your boyfriend's handwriting for the first time and realizing he writes, like, a four-year-old's. But, see, that's how I feel people think about me. But as someone who knows you to your core, it tracks. Non-sexual thing that guys do that, like, I find attractive is when they write really fast. And it's, like, scribble. Like a doctor? No. Just, like, I don't know. It's very boyish. What are they writing? I...

Probably nothing. Where did they get the pencil from? We didn't talk about Just Ken. Oh, I missed it. So did I. Thank God. I think the universe did that. I do have to say, he's an amazing performer because he was in the Mickey Mouse gang. You are obsessed with the Mickey Mouse Club. It's so niche and I love it. I saw clips. I felt like he also didn't want to do it.

I felt like he was like, I think it's weird they asked me to do this, but I have to do it because it's the Oscars and I'm Ryan Gosling and I'm going to do it. But like some people argued his singing was better than most like male pop stars out there today. You know who else's singing is really, really good that people don't talk about? Who? Zendaya.

Oh my god. She's so good. She's so good at so many things that she, I mean, it's actually probably annoying that she's like, should I have a hit record? Or like, should I be a runway model? And she's also a dancer. I mean, of course. One other hot take. What was I going to say? She's someone who doesn't really have like Instagram. Well, she has an Instagram, but I feel like she's like. Well, she hides her man. She's very private. And you just have to see clips of her. Yeah. So I was driving to West Virginia. Yeah.

This actually could have been when the drama started. I decided to listen to the whole Ariana Grande album. Oh, yes. I saw that. I've never done this in my life. No, you're living your best life on Snapchat. You guys. Don't believe Kylie Jenner. It's all about Snapchat. Follow Hannah Burner. You guys, if you've been listening to this episode, you go, I feel really bad for Hannah. Follow me on Snapchat. It'll make me feel better because I'm trying to become a Snapchat star. I love it. Because I...

Because I'm just trying to find something to give me joy in life. So, you know, people are like, I love that album. I've never listened to a whole album. Me neither. I have top 40 tastes. Give me the hits, baby. Just the hits. I go, I'm going to listen to this like the story she wants to tell. I didn't even know artists did that. I was like, wait, it goes in order? You're telling us something? I've never done it before. Never in my life. So she starts off basically being like,

We're not compatible. We're divorcing. And then she, and it's very like her like whispering. Yeah. And you know, I don't love it. Cause I'm like, you're Ariana Grande fucking belt. Give me like, like, it doesn't have to be a ballad, but like, don't just voice it like this the whole time. Like AI could do that. Yeah. You want to hear stomach. You want it to come from your chest. Yes.

Yes. The whole album or just this particular song? A lot of the song was very like... All the songs were very airy, a lot of them. And it was very like...

like Brandy, the boy is mine vibes, like 90s, like it's very retro 90s. So the song that everyone was like, where the music video has the dog in it and everyone's like, oh, it was about her stealing the other husband, but it's actually about Mac Miller. And people were like, I feel like this album made people not mad at her anymore that she stole someone's husband.

See, the press is being like, this is the greatest thing ever. And then you press in the comments and people are like, stop trying to push it. So there's a lot of PR happening right now. Because the Boy Is Mine song is kind of like, it's actually a good one where she's like, that boy is mine based off of a Brandy song. But then if she's singing about

The Spongebob, the whole thing, it kind of loses the point. Okay, we lost the plot here. Because you know you want to be like singing to something like, yeah, that's fucking hot. Yeah. I don't want a song about like how I got Spongebob from another woman. No, I don't want it either. Like when I would listen to her songs and she had just broken up with Pete, like I'm into it. She's dating Pete. I'm into it. Thank you, next. Yeah, and then it's like, okay, but I don't... Even if Spongebob was available...

And also the last man on earth. I'm not investing my time. Keep it to yourself. No, keep it to yourself. And look, obviously we support short kings. We support redheads. We support men in the arts. Yeah. The last one's hard, but we do it.

But it's a weird flex. Weird flex. Yeah, let's bring that back. That's what I think of the album. Weird flex. And I thought Yes End was good. I think everyone's like Yes End's not the best. I thought Yes End was the catchiest. I also liked her Oscars dress because she brought her whole comforter with her and she was like, I'm gonna stay comfy. Very giggly coated. I liked it. I liked it too. I don't. Love the hair. I don't love the hair. She's a brunette. She's a brunette. When is she gonna address that she's Italian?

What is she? It's almost like she doesn't. She is not proud of the community? I feel like we should bring her a lasagna, like reinforce these are your roots. Yes. These are your people. Yes, I think something happened and she's went awry. Yeah. She's listening to some other voices in her head that are not Italian. Right. I'll tell you that right now.

No, but hers- No, there is a voice in my head that is 100% Sicilian and she's terrifying. She'll burn your fucking house down. One thing too with Ariana is she had that phase where like she only wore her hair in a ponytail. I loved that phase. But like I've seen her with her hair down and she's-

Stunning, gorgeous. So you know there's something going on that she has a particular view of how she looks, which I get it. I think she wants to look very innocent right now. And the blonde, really pale gives a lot more innocence than brunette, high pony eyeliner that gives like... I just stole your man. Yeah.

So I think that's also a PR play. It's a lot of strategy involved that's honestly above our pay grade. Yeah, we can't. We cried this weekend to our moms. No, we both cried to our moms. Giggly squad, I love you guys so much.

Decompress before you go into the office if you just listened to this. Maybe take a minute for yourself. Do a 10-second meditation. Sage your room. We really apologize for this episode. It's unlike us. I was caught off guard just as much as you were. I'm trying to bring up a TikTok. Hannah has a full-on meltdown. Thank you so much for listening. We'll be back next week. You never say the goodbyes. We're in a crisis here. Goodbye. Goodbye.