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cover of episode Episode 16: Tana's Stalker is Stalking Brooke

Episode 16: Tana's Stalker is Stalking Brooke

2021/12/1
logo of podcast Cancelled with Tana Mongeau & Brooke Schofield

Cancelled with Tana Mongeau & Brooke Schofield

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Tana and Brooke discuss Brooke's encounter with Tana's stalker, leading to a deep dive into Brooke's phobias and personal experiences.

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And we're your hosts for Season 3 of Amazing Wildlife, a show from iHeartRadio Ruby Studio and the global conservation organization behind the San Diego Zoo and the San Diego Zoo Safari Park. Listen as we dive into the efforts here in San Diego and spotlight the heroes working worldwide to care for the species you know and love. Listen to Amazing Wildlife on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Cancel. Don't remember doing this at all. I can only hold myself accountable. Cancel. I am Jack. I am Jack.

look how good my life is so what else is canceled i'm so drunk i know and you really didn't come in like i thought you were i thought she was gonna go hello and welcome back to the canceled podcast no and i am hammered and brooke is sober no literally i am very drunk and brooke is very i'm not sober now now here's she just made me check two white what what are these truly i

know but i just need you to chug like nine more like i'm not i have i have a burping phobia and they're very carbonated and cold wait you even so brooke honestly i don't know if you guys know this brooke has the i'm not kidding someone burps and you like try to kill yourself it's not bad yeah yes it is like you it's i think not like you like you're leaving if someone burps it's like a thing it's because

This is how I feel. Okay. And I don't feel this way about everything. Like, I don't care about, like, someone farting or, like, something like that. But I swear, burping for some reason, I have this, like, image in my head. I picture it. I picture, like, the burp, the cloud, like, the gas cloud. I picture it.

picture that happening and then I picture it settling into everything in the room so if I have an open glass of water can't drink it anymore my white claw done for because your burp is in it I actually like when I'm around you I will hold a burp in for so long to the point that I have like indigestion because I don't want you to I don't want you to feel that way but burping is a choice and I really truly believe that

The bodily function. No, no, no. It's not. Because, like, burping, you can always control that. Keep it in your mouth. Hold it in your mouth. Keep your mouth closed. Well, it's like the chewing phobia. I understand. There's certain things that you just, like, do not like. And, like, there's...

You don't always have to have a reason for it. It's just like, you have a phobia of it. You don't like it. I get it. Well, because it feels like intentional disrespect. It's like, close your mouth. But I never knew until right now that your burping phobia was so far that you wouldn't burp. No, well, I don't... I mean, it's like I...

How am I going to be insensitive in that way? Like, what if the viewers have a burping phobia as well? But, you know, I don't care if you burp. And we can't, like, trigger warning. Trigger warning burps. Stop. That's what I want TikTok to become. I'm in, on Facebook, I'm in a misophonia support group. Stop. I am, but it's because. I'm not laughing at misophonia. I'm laughing at a Facebook support group. It's huge. In general. It's a huge community.

I'm so sorry. It's a huge community. Misophonia is the sound of things or the little circles? It's like... No, it's trip. It can be a lot of different things and people, like, obviously there's levels to this shit, okay? I don't have, like, a lot of people have it way worse. I had a really good friend in high school who hers was so bad it was, like, debilitating. Like, she would have to be, like, removed from class if someone was, like, chewing gum kind of thing. I know.

But what's crazy is at that time, I was like, you're ridiculous. Like, get over it. Like, whatever. And until you, like, really start to feel that way. No, I haven't. You don't understand. And then as soon as I, like, really, like, I, it was like I developed it. I swear, I haven't always been that way. And it was like over time, all of a sudden it would, like,

I understand. And I actually genuinely refrain from burping around you at all times. So I do have a level of understanding. All I need to know is that somebody is cognizant of it and like and tries because I have friends who will belch in my face and like literally hands behind their back. There's no effort. Why is that Ari? Ari loves to burp so much. But everyone knows now and everyone's eyes will widen the second they do it. And they're like, oh, no, no, no. No, I'll hit an in-mouth burp with you. It'll ruin my day. This is me with you. I'm like...

Like I hit like an in-mouth burp for you. It's more about, yeah, it's like as long as you're trying. No, and honest to God, I think, I don't know if arachnophobia is only the fear of spiders or the fear of bugs, but I have a crippling fear of bugs. Yeah, I don't know what the bug fear is, but arachnophobia I think is. I have severe fear of bugs.

And it's like a fly will be in the room and I'm like screaming at the top of everyone's lungs. I remember. I made like a funny video in Hawaii. I picked up like a little like caterpillar looking. It was like foam. It was like, it was, it was the end of a pillow. It was like a tassel from a pillow. And I freaked out. I picked it up and she almost beat me.

my ass no and i freak the fuck out and it's like but i under but i do understand it because there's certain things that like that actually upset me that much maybe not burping but like well there can just be a fly in the room and i'm like acting like ted bundy's in the room like i like freak out like someone's gonna fucking kill me like i can't deal because i think i won't gaslight you everyone will always be like it's just a fly it's just a fly and i'm like okay but flies regurgitate every time they land so knowing that when they land on you they're vomiting

on you. That's cute. You know, see, I don't, no, not cute. No, it's not cute. I thought about something cute. I'm sorry. No, I thought about something cute. I was with, I was with Joe. I was with Joe at breakfast. Do you remember my name?

Did we name your guy Joe? Yeah, we named him Joe. It's really funny because the show you. I know. He serves me. That was a whole context. Is that why we did that? I don't remember that. I hate that. Also, the trauma gave me crippling memory loss. I'm really hitting all the victim cards today. I have arachnophobia. I have memory loss from trauma. Sorry. Anywho, I was at breakfast with Joe the other morning and a fly landed on my raspberry and he picked the raspberry off and just put it. And I thought about it and I was like, who?

Who cares? Do you know that just made me gag? You know what I'm joking? See, I have no... In the depth of my throat, I just gagged. I'll eat food off the floor. That's why, like, a lot of people... I'll eat food off the floor. Oh. Like, it's not dirt. Like, I just have a crippling fear of bugs. Well, we know you're not afraid of dirt, baby. Yeah, no shit, bitch. Like, I literally just have a crippling fear of bugs. That is really strange. I don't know. I don't have anything like that. Like, I was playing hide-and-seek yesterday.

I texted Brooke and we were texting about something really important. And she texted me back hours later and goes, sorry, I was playing hide and seek. I was like, excuse me. What? It was the best. I had the best day ever yesterday. I was like, I was hanging out with like, it was like six of us or seven of us.

And we were all at Kaysan's house, so Kaysan has, like, the crazy, like... Kaysan's so daddy. Let's talk about that. He's so hot. No one ever told us that. Let's talk about Kaysan for eight seconds before we get into the story. Okay. So Kaysan's always been, like, an L.A., like...

I believe his family comes from money, no? I have no idea where the keyboard case is. He has the most beautiful home here in LA. He's always been like a very rich friend of like everyone in LA. And FaZe Clan just signed him. Yeah, now he's FaZe Kaysan. Yeah, and he just did a music video with FaZe Clan where like Charli D'Amelio was in it, Addison Rae was in it, Madison Beer, everyone was in it. It was like the most clouded video of all time. Of all time. He said, check this one out. He brought in all his little friends. Like Justin Bieber and shit.

No, yeah. Not really. No, literally. Or it was like the Migos or like Future. It was just like the craziest video. And it's like, how did you line up all those people's schedules? And he was always our like rich, low-key, well-kept secret friend. And now he's just killing it. Yeah, he's out there. I love K-Son. Yeah. But continue. Like I wasn't really like, we've never been close. I don't really like know him that well. But yesterday we all went. It was like six or seven of us. We all went to K-Son's house and like,

The entire day was just so perfect. It was like everybody, no, the whole time it was phones in the middle, phones in the middle, a pile of phones. And you live for that. K-Stone puts seven phones in the middle. He's like. Of course. And nobody touched their phone the entire time. We like, we sat at, we went to El Pisteo. We had like a nice dinner or whatever. And we went home and everyone played hide and seek for literally like five hours. And it was just so like in the dark. And it was like, I don't know. I thought it was like the coolest thing. Cause it's like a bunch of kids who are like,

Killing it and like playing hide and seek. I love that. Well, it's just like, I mean, I don't have very many friends who can go more than 30 seconds without looking at their phone.

And see, I felt like that was an in-life subtweet. I'm not going to lie. It is. I'm bad at that. Baby, I looked her up and down. I was talking about her. No, I'm bad at that. But I also think it's my ADHD. I just like, I see a text and I get mad distracted. Not to, I'm not trying to Gabbie Hanna it. I get it. Like, don't blame your ADHD on everything. I'm not always, I'm not going to take an Adderall to go to dinner though. I'm prescribed Adderall. That's not a drug use joke. It's like I have crippling ADHD. So I take Adderall to like focus when I work and like live life.

But I hate, like Adderall also makes you a drone. Like, you know what I mean? It makes you so like, hello guys, I am on Adderall. I am focused now. No, and our last podcast, everyone kept saying it was like our best podcast ever because we were being so funny and chill. And it's one of the few ones that I've done without being on ADHD medication.

Because it's like normally I take it, I wake up, I work all day. See, I always ask you, I said that initially because I was like, how do you do that and like still have a personality? I don't though. As soon as I got, maybe I was like my dosage was off or something, but I, my personality just completely like disappears with it.

No one. Like, I can't make a joke. I don't think anything's funny. And then I'm probably going to cry and probably send you to death. And you hate everyone and you want to die. Yeah, I'm so mean. It's so tragic because it's like my options in life are like have crippling ADHD. Like, you're unmotivated to do anything. You can't focus on anything. You're so depressive. You have 10 seconds before you're like, squirrel, no.

Like literally like I have the most crippling ADHD you could ever ask for in this life. Or you take the Adderall to fix your ADHD and your mad focus, but you're like, hello, my name is Tana and this is the canceled podcast. That was like me in college. I like, I feel like my personality, I had like two years of no personality.

But now I have, like, a very convenient lifestyle for having ADHD. Because it's like no one's going to suffer if I sit on the couch all day. I just feel like mine is so crippling that even though my lifestyle is, like, quote-unquote convenient for it, like, I can do whatever I want. No, but you have to wake up every day and, like, get things done and, like, actually work. And ADHD cripples, like, your body. It's like I can't even stand. I can't even go get my phone from, like, the other side of the room. Like, you can't do anything. You're just, like, stuck. I can't get ready unless...

Dude, I just learned about this thing with ADHD called mirroring. That it's like if you have ADHD, you can do anything you want if someone else is doing it. It's called mirroring. It's like as in like if I'm editing and Hunter's editing next to me, I can edit fire. Because I keep being mentally reminded that I'm supposed to edit. That can't be true because I watch my roommate clean all day and I don't do shit. No, but for me, it's like I can't get ready unless someone's getting ready next to me.

Unless obviously I take my medication. That I believe. No, like it's just like, it's the weirdest thing. Like it's like I can work all day if Kyla's there working with me. But if I'm alone, like I'm just like the ceiling is so dope. Yeah. Like, and it's so fucking annoying. It makes me want death. Buenos dias world from the San Diego Zoo Wildlife Alliance. I'm Marco Wendt. And I'm Rick Schwartz.

And we're your hosts for season three of Amazing Wildlife, a show from iHeartRadio Ruby Studio and the global conservation organization behind the San Diego Zoo and the San Diego Zoo Safari Park. Listen as we dive into the efforts here in San Diego and spotlight the heroes working worldwide to care for the species you know and love. Listen to Amazing Wildlife on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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I know for sure. Cause it's like, sometimes you're so motivated and like, did it like so funny. Yeah. But then other times it's like, I, this couch is so sick and I hate it. But speaking, we were just talking about me being dirty. You're not, I don't think you're, I'm not dirty. I'm not dirty now, especially cause I'm single. When you're saying when I'm, when I'm taken, I'm like so stuck in it and I'm like, Oh my God. Like I'm like, I'll just be gross. Who cares? Like Dorito dust in my hair.

No, exactly. Unless I'm with someone who's like mad motivated, then I'll mirror them. Literally that. You are a mirror. No, 100%. I'm a mirror. Like if I'm like dating a guy who like showers every second, I'll be like, let's shower. But if I'm dating someone who's like depressive slightly, I'm like, I love you.

I love the ceiling. That's crazy because you gaslight the fuck out of me about showering too much. No, you shouldn't. But you're an over-showerer. I can't even begin to explain. Brooke thinks like four showers a day is normal. No one takes four showers a day. Not that I think four showers a week is normal. I'm just saying like even that like two. What? I don't know. I don't know.

But point being, I need to tell you what happened to me today. Okay. So you know that I've been having a lot of conversations with you about either A, my stalker is fucking with me or B, my house is haunted. Do you know that your stalker came for me? Oh, yeah. I don't know if he did or not, but keep going. What happened? No, tell me. No, you have to talk first. Yeah. Okay. So basically, I just went to Vegas. And before I left for Vegas, I was at my house and I showered.

Long story, actually. Can I tell you a long story? It's two stories in one. How long? I'm like...

You're like fucking bitch. I'm like ADHD. First comes to first. First comes first is right before I left, we shot the commercial for my upcoming wine. So I'm shooting Dizzy Wines coming out soon. I will promote it. Grocery stores, online. It's delicious and I got really drunk. Really easily. It's actually my favorite thing in the world. My favorite project I've worked on in years. We were shooting the commercial and the billboards for Dizzy Wine and I had everyone come and

And right before it, the night before, I was supposed to self-tan and I didn't. And I woke up and I was so pale and like just iron deficiency. As you know, I'm...

Why do I have so many problems with the ADHD, the iron deficiency, everything? I had so many bruises all over me. I looked horrible. And my makeup artist was like, do not let me glam you until you tan. Like it was that bad. Like I literally was the wall. Damn Alexis. No, no. But she's just honest. I'm just kidding. It's a billboard and a commercial. And it's one thing you can face in the billboard, but like you can't fucking edit the commercial. Like I needed to look like a decent level of good. Right. And so Kyla, my assistant, was like, let's get you a spray tan.

And so we order a spray tan for my like girl who does mine. And she's like, I'm busy. So she sends her like cousin or something who also does spray tan. Not the cousin. And I see her and I'm like, can I please have a light to medium? And she's like, of course. And

I don't believe you would ever, those words would ever come out of your mouth. No, I genuinely promise you because it was like, it was in like three hours. So it was like, I'm not trying to look like crazy. Obviously you want it to be dark and then rinse it off. But like if you're doing it in three hours, I'd like an instant and I'd like it to be light to medium. And so I ordered this spray tan.

She's like light to medium. She sprays me. I look fine. It looks great. I sit down in the makeup chair in the three hours of development. I'm talking world. I've logged it. It's coming out on YouTube. That's what happened to Selena Gomez at the Met. World. Did it? Yeah. Bryce just got canceled for lying and saying he fucked her on his YouTube channel. Aw, man.

idiot. But point being, I sit in the makeup chair. It's fine. Three hours go by. She does my glam to like match the original color. I look in the mirror. Worldwide scandal. So I have to like wash this tan off like and it's and then now my body's lighter than my face makeup. It's horrible thing. Body makeup with the whole set. That day,

right before I leave to Vegas. That day, I have to shower off the entire tent. I'm furious. I want to say this bitch's name. I kept saying it in my vlog. I was ready to kill her. Like, because it was, it was like,

a $20,000 shoot, the Dizzy shoot. So it was like being late to it, like genuinely affected money and a lot of people. And it was like, I couldn't show up like that because it was just like a worldwide scandal. So I had to like shower it off, whatever. So I turned my shower on, I take a shower, I rinse the tan off, whole shoot. I have to have KKW body makeup from literally my neck to my toes because like my body was now paler than my makeup, whatever. Point being, I showered it off in my house.

In my shower. And so, you know, I hate my house. And I don't want to bitch about it too much. But my shower. Makes me miss my shower in my old house so much. Because...

It's tragic. It's freezing cold. There's an air vent over it. It sucks. And you know I already hate showering. She said it was freezing cold. You know that she keeps her thermostat on 56 degrees. Well, that's a different thing. I want it to be like that in the room, but why would there be a fucking air vent over the shower? 56 degrees, you guys. Why would there be a fucking air vent over the shower? I don't even know. Whatever. And water pressure sucks, goes cold in 20 seconds. I can't talk about it. Anyways, my shower. Oh, never mind. No, wait, tell me. No, keep going. All right.

So my shower has like options in the shower. There's like three knobs like you can turn it on and then it's like there's a rain vibe. There's a regular shower vibe and there's like a handle nozzle vibe. Oh, yeah, that's tough.

I know. I'm well aware at how I sound. I'm sorry. You set me up. No, but also most showers, you can like, even with the nozzle vibe, even in any shower, you can take your regular shower and have the nozzle on. You know what I mean? Oh, but is it like one or the other? It's like one or the other. So I'm like, what would I ever use this nozzle for? Like washing a dog? Like I'm not going to wash myself with just the nozzle. I used to shower only with my little nozzle. I was like this. But aren't you freezing doing that? Probably. Probably.

Terrifying to me. So basically I always shower with the regular shower. And so I take the shower, I wash my tan off. I shoot the commercial. Next day I leave to Vegas, right? No one comes in the house. Everyone on my team is gone on their Christmas vacations.

um normally we have housekeepers but they came and cleaned like a couple days prior they're not coming till i'm back no hunter's gone aria maria and i go to vegas like no one's there i took the last shower in my shower right right and so this morning brooke i'm like i need to shower i'm still washing off the tan i'm still washing off the tan i'm talking i've showered

Good, like three times since that shoot. Still exfoliating it off. I know, right? Unbelievable. But it's because I looked insane. I looked like insane, like patches of dark tan and then white tan everywhere. You want to know a key? A magic eraser. Like for the walls? Yes. Yes.

Do you know one time I literally graffitied Hunter's walls with lipstick and had to use a magic eraser for every single one of them? Magic eraser solves every problem in the entire world. Every problem. A magic eraser takes off spray tan. You're actually telling me a magic eraser takes off spray tan? Yeah, I'll be like... Swear to fucking God I'm Amazon priming 100,000 after this. But listen, so today I'm like, I need to still wash off the rest of this tan before I podcast. Hence why I'm literally... Look at my... You've never seen me this pale on the podcast. I'm the color of my shirt.

I look insane. Today, I know I am the last person to use my shower.

And I know what setting it was on. Like nobody else would have been there? No one else. I turn. I'm on the phone. I'm listening to a voice memo. I'm holding the clothes I was going to wear on the podcast today in my hand. And I go to turn the shower on. And the nozzle is facing me. And just sprays freezing cold water all over me. All over the floor. All over the shower. All over the room. Absolutely everywhere I'm talking. I literally go. Whew.

Like I scream at the top of my fucking lungs. You know I hate unwarranted water. That's my biggest pet peeve, the way burping is for you. Unwarranted water? Not the unwarranted water. I'm down for water. Like I'll get in the ocean, I'll take a shower. Yeah, but like water with no warning. Water that I'm not asking for. Water that I'm not asking for. Sprays me all over the face, wets my entire head of hair. Sprays my clothes, shopping wet. Aw, man. I start crying. Wait, what?

I had a mental breakdown. Why were you in the shower with your clothes on? No, I was holding my clothes, turning on the shower, sprayed me. I'm like, I'm washing me and my clothes. Like that was the vibe. But also who switched the shower nozzle? Yeah, that is really confusing. You don't think there's nobody who could have taken a shower in your shower? No.

No. Yeah, your stalker's back. Like who switched my shower nozzle? I know it's such a random thing, but I know for a fact I was the last person to take a regular shower and I never switched it. There was no one there. Camera wise, I've seen on the cameras, no one was there. And then Hunter last night was asleep in his bed and he wakes up to his phone being thrown off the bed and shattered.

Oh, man. Can we just like explain that? That's really weird. But then it's like that gives me ghost vibes that doesn't give me. No, I agree. I agree. I don't think. No, no. Hunter was laying in bed and he woke up to his phone being thrown off the bed and shattered. I'm talking shattered. Like it's shattered now. Do you think he had a like night terror and he was like. He said he woke up and he saw it like fly off the bed and he doesn't understand. What the fuck?

and then i was a ghost for sure can't you need to have some like a paranormal person you can even do it for like a youtube video you need to have someone who like specializes in paranormal activity come to your house and like literally i agree but it just freaks me out so hard yeah it's one of those things it's like do i want to know as you guys may or may not know like a lady did die in my house before i moved in and they didn't tell me that happily happy lady and she didn't we don't know that she died in the house no no we live in the house and we know she died in the house

Like the neighbors? No, they were there. Oh, they were there. And they were this whole thing. Buenos dias, world, from the San Diego Zoo Wildlife Alliance. I'm Marco Wendt. And I'm Rick Schwartz.

And we're your hosts for season three of Amazing Wildlife, a show from iHeartRadio Ruby Studio and the global conservation organization behind the San Diego Zoo and the San Diego Zoo Safari Park. Listen as we dive into the efforts here in San Diego and spotlight the heroes working worldwide to care for the species you know and love. Listen to Amazing Wildlife on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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Sign up and download Grammarly for free at grammarly.com slash podcast. That's G-R-A-M-M-A-R-L-Y dot com slash podcast. Grammarly. Easier said, done. But she was 102. It wasn't like someone killed her or something. But it's weird. Yeah, she had a long, she doesn't, girl, she doesn't regret anything. She moved on. She does not want to stay around. She was 102. She was already, she did enough.

Also, I was like right before I left for Vegas, I was laying in bed with a boy. We don't need to name the boy. But him and I...

You know, you know. And I was laying in the bed with the boy and Ari brought a mattress in my room and we put it up against the wall. And it was like fully like up against the wall. Like an earthquake would have to move this mattress from the wall. It wasn't like a propped up, like going to fall over. It was like a leaning against the wall, like nothing. And we're laying in the bed and the mattress flies at my bed and we both make no noise. We look at each other and we're like,

That was weird. Yeah, you have a ghost. And then Ari calls me and he goes, why did you just scream at the top of your lungs? I was dead silent when that happened. I didn't make one noise. The mattress flew at the bed and I was like, like silent. And he was like, I just heard you scream at the top of your lungs. I never did. I would have screamed.

No, but it's like so jarring. It's weird. Like doors will shut here. Yeah, but it's kind of like a weird like... That's what happened to me. That's what I was kind of trying to say in the beginning. I just had a situation. I live on the first floor in my apartment. Yeah, I told you this. I know, but I forgot about this. Can you please sell the podcast? Yeah, I live on the first floor and I have in my room like a sliding glass door, like a back door, but it's to the side of my building. I don't even... I feel like that's bad to say because it's like, is someone going to come kill me? No. Anyway, I got a ring, but...

In the middle of the night, I've never, I've never, I've always lived either alone or like my roommates are always gone. I never have felt like fear being alone. I've been sleeping at home alone since I was four years old.

Independent queen. Well, no, I'm just like that. I don't know why I'm not like really that afraid of things, but no, I'm the only child with abandonment issues. I can't be alone. The next day. And I was so excited. So I took NyQuil so that I would be able to go to sleep early and like wake up early and have a day. Yeah. So I went to bed at like maybe like 10 o'clock and at like 1130, I, I hear, and I knew the sound because the bed, like the, I can't get out of that door. I can't use it. It's not functional to me because the screen is like, like stuck.

So I can't open the screen to it. It's a screen to a bedroom door. And then the actual door, obviously, like, it opens. But, like, if the screen can't move, then I can't get outside of it. But I could hear the screen moving. And there's, like, the side of my building is, like, well lit. So it, like, I can see through.

The door, like straight out because it was dark in my room and light outside. So I could see straight out. And I knew, I literally knew it in the moment. And I just roll over and I see a guy yanking the door open. Like he's trying so hard to get the door. He finally gets the door open. I jump out of bed so fast, obviously, but I'm dead silent because I'm for a second. I'm just like.

there's no fucking way. Right, it's William. There's literally no way. Why do I kind of think it is my stalker? Because he stalks my best friends. See, I didn't think... I never even... Again, like, maybe I'm just naive, but it never came to my mind. So I...

stupidly turned on my light really quick because I was like, oh, that'll scare him. Like, maybe he'll, like, stop trying. But then I was like, what the fuck are you doing? Like, he's going to shoot me or something. So I ran in my roommate's room. He doesn't serve me shooter. He doesn't give me shooter either, but I don't know who this guy is. So I'm like, why would, like, I don't know why I would do that. Like, make it known that I'm in the room. But,

He I called the police the police like it was like five police officers that came and they were like, oh, sorry I can't find him. I'm like, oh great. No, I'll sleep. I'll sleep fine in here from now on That's a tragic thing about like someone just showing up and leaving is it's like the police like obviously they're like there for you But like if no one's there like when they yeah, they just like they told me it's like they were like probably It was probably just like a drunk guy like trying to get in somewhere, but it's like right. It's not and

And then I didn't think... I never... Like, it never crossed my mind about, like, a stalker or anything, but I tweeted about it. And then all the Tana fans were like, oh, William's coming. And that fucking... All of a sudden, now I'm like, I can't sleep in my room without being like, oh, my God. Well, no, it's because...

Again, I don't mean to talk about my soccer too much because I hate talking about it. Because I feel like it fires them up. It makes me really uncomfortable to talk about it. But it's like I've always talked about it. So I guess like whatever. And at this point, I'm at the point where I feel like he's fucking with us so much that talking about it almost makes you feel safer. Because it's like if I die, at least everyone will know it was him. Like knew what the fuck was up with that. Yeah. But like he's always fucked with me and my girl best friends. So like there's not a part of me that doesn't think it was him. Great.

That's perfect. Sorry. Anyway, I'm moving. Buenos Dias, world, from the San Diego Zoo Wildlife Alliance. I'm Marco Wendt. And I'm Rick Schwartz.

And we're your hosts for season three of Amazing Wildlife, a show from iHeartRadio Ruby Studio and the global conservation organization behind the San Diego Zoo and the San Diego Zoo Safari Park. Listen as we dive into the efforts here in San Diego and spotlight the heroes working worldwide to care for the species you know and love. Listen to Amazing Wildlife on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

I also want to move too. There's so many robberies around my house right now. Well, LA is just a scary place right now. Literally like in the depths of Beverly Hills. It's like people are just getting robbed left and right. It's like, I don't know. Daylight. There's no such thing as like bad LA, good LA anymore. It's just like everyone's scared. Amari needs to take his Rolex off. No, entirely. And I'm like, actually, like everyone keeps telling him that because it's like,

People keep robbing people of Marlowe's jewelry. Speaking of bad LA, I'm mad at Bryce Hall. Why? And it's annoying because we're touring. Aw, man. Like, no. That's my new bit. Aw, man. Aw, man. Like, no, Bryce, obviously he's my bestie, but I'm mad at him right now because he said one sentence on the internet that really upset me. And I want to hear your opinion on it. What did he say?

Bryce, I love you. We're touring. You're my best friend. You just say some, obviously you say some dumb shit. Bryce, you're so hot. And obviously Bryce, Bryce is honestly, Bryce is one of my favorite friends because it's like I say some dumb shit, but he makes me feel like everything I say is like Einstein level. Like the level of things Bryce. It's like backhanded. It is. Like the level of like stupidity and the things Bryce say sometimes and the level of stupidity that Bryce says sometimes. Her glitching saying that sentence. Because I'm drunk. Maybe it's you.

Makes me feel like I'm Einstein compared to Bryce. Okay. So last week he was reacting to Reality House, the show we just shot, which I'm about to talk about with you as well. But he was reacting to it. And he verbatim said that he feels like I am more hated on the Internet than him. And you disagreed. Yes. Yes.

Do you think Bryce is less hated than me? Yes. Oh, absolutely. I don't. And I don't even think it's, like, negotiated. I actually genuinely think that that's, like, really very true. See, and I hate that. But I don't, like, I don't think that that's warranted. That's not to say that I think that that, like, should...

be the case, but I think that, like, women just generally are more hated, like, by default. Yes, but I feel like Bryce is so hated. Like, that's our bit. Yeah, but he's got that, he's got that, like, like, like,

cult TikTok following that like of course you have TikTok followers but those people are Tana fans like he's got just like TikTok on like on lock yeah oh yeah I'm like are you kidding we're all like Addison Rae like I think Bryce is equally as hated as me not necessarily more but I do think he's equally as hated and I'm sick yeah well we all have we're all wrong sometimes

No, I'm honestly more mad at Bryce for just saying it. Just like, don't say that. No, yeah, he shouldn't have said that maybe. And I would be like offended by it for sure. Because he, I mean, of course, he's pretty problematic on the internet. We know that. But he's very deliberate about it. Like you don't think, I feel like Bryce is as hated as me. I feel like our cult followings are...

Obviously they're different but I feel like they're really cool. You definitely have like a really loyal following too and I think that's true. Love you guys. Stay gorgeous. But his are like the younger the audience the harder they go. So that's the fact. I'm just sick about it. I'm fucking sick. And the less involved they are in actual like problematic like you know what I mean? I feel like you have the older people looking at you heavy. I will never ever say this. I'm serious. I think I'm one of the more hated people on the internet but I do somehow think I'm less hated than Bryce Hall. Maybe I'm

Maybe I'm completely delusional. Yeah, it's okay to be delusional. Humble me in the comments. I'm just sincerely furious at that.

No, I think they're wrong. I think you guys are both like probably equally problematic. But I think any but what's I feel like he's more clearly deliberate and you it almost seems accidental. All this. That's true. Like I just exist and people want me dad and Bryce is like, hate me. I hate me. I hate you all. You know what I mean? Yeah. Bryce is like, this is hysterical. Let's keep it going. Yeah. Yours feels accidental.

Yeah, mine's really... Every time you stumble into something, everyone's like, oh, that... She fucked up, but it's really... You're like, that bitch. She's smarter than you think, y'all. I don't know. I don't know. I honestly... I'm not even saying it in a way that I'm, like, very sure of it. I'm more, like, sound off. Like, I, like, I'm not sure that I... Let us know. That I believe. I could be wrong, too. I also... Also, I feel like I might have a warped understanding because I'm so close to you. Because you're like, I hate you. No. No.

No, but I see like, like, I mean, I see like day to day, like what you get. And I don't feel like I feel like you're way more supporters than you have haters. But like, I don't know the haters that you do. I'm like, they are committed. They I know 100% people want me dead. But I'm just saying I don't know. I just I don't know if I agree with Bryce Hall. But anyways, buy our tour tickets coming soon. Brooke's coming. So do I. Wait, but I want to talk about one more thing. What is it? Speaking of being hated on the Internet.

Me. Oh. She looked at me like, no, no, no, no, no, no. Here's the thing. Reality house. Oh, no. So reality house. Not a big climber herself. Kian and JC have been shooting the show for three seasons, and I desperately wanted to go on the first and second, but things came up. So it was kind of like a running joke for me to, for a fact, be on the third.

And they text me and they're like, please be on the third season. And I'm like, I know because I'm just furious. No, I'm kidding. I'm not. I'm actually not furious. I was a joke. I'm just drunk. But they were like, come on third season. And I was like, OK, listen, I I know there's a lot of athletic challenges. I'm not going to be able to do them. I'm not an athletic girl. You're aware of that. I can't walk down the street. I've seen you bust it down at the club.

And that's fine. I'll shake some ass. I'll throw some ass easily, especially for like some men or some money or some. We need a real incentive. 100K not going to cut it. Well, let's we'll talk about that as well. But I'm saying point being even know even when it comes to money, like like I said on TikTok in high school.

In middle school, there'd be a field day. There was a field day in middle school where I punched myself in the face and made my nose bleed so that I would be able to go home so that I wouldn't do it. You didn't feel like there were any other alternatives? No, they were like, you have to do it. And I was like, check this one out. I'm going to gush blood.

That was my, before the nose job, that was my big thing. I could make my nose bleed in four seconds. So I'd get out of anything. Like actually my party trick, like genuinely. And then even in high school, there'd be like a mile and I would lay on the ground. I walked the mile too. I was like, no, but even before walking it, I would lay on the ground and pretend like I fucking passed out so that I wouldn't have to run the mile. It wasn't our walk the mile or whatever. Like I'm, I'm not agile. Like the most agile thing I can do is like maybe ride a deck.

I'm not here. The talent in this one. And Ethan.

And even when I work out, it's like walking on a treadmill until I feel like I burned the calories. I've seen she run before. She can run if she puts her mind to it. But at the same time, it has to be very controlled. When it comes to severe agility, it's not in my book. Yeah, I get it. You don't give me Serena Williams vibes. Right. Thank you. Thank you. And I told Kian and JC, I would love to shoot Reality House.

but I will not be able to complete any of the physical challenges. And they told me, that's fine. We want you there to stir up drama, be a, you know. That is her true talent. That's her calling. They've seen, like, I've shot reality shows. Like, my thing on a reality show is to come in and just cause chaos. And that's just that on that. And so we get there, and the first challenge is to rock climb a, like, 20-foot wall. Like, okay, Spider-Man. And I said, hey, I'm not going to do that. Also, secondarily...

People are coming for me like I was in it to win it. And it's like, it's awesome that I'm doing this. I'm so grateful for the opportunity. But I know that nobody started watching the show with the mindset like, oh, I think Tana's going to really take this one home. That's my point. And then I'm there on the show and there's so many people that are deserving of the winnings. You know what I mean? Like there's a single mom who's like barely doing internet stuff and like up and coming. There's people who just like,

Deserve it Want it to win it Like the way I'm gonna make $100,000 Is with a foot pick And that's just that on that Okay Onlyfans.com Slash Shannon Mojo I'm gonna fucking I'm gonna post a foot pick I'm gonna post I'm gonna post a butt pick Like I'm not going to win $100,000 By rock climbing Especially if I'm rock climbing Competing with agile people

buff ass man. It's not going to happen. Yeah, you can't snap those nails, baby. I know you just sat in bed for three hours for those. And I was getting paid to like have that look, have those nails, like have the Swarovski crystal moment. And I was like, listen, I'm not going to rock climb. And I never thought in the moment, like obviously Kian and JC acted very frustrated with the fact that I wasn't going to rock climb. But afterwards we had several conversations where they were like, we weren't frustrated. It was for the drama. That night we talked about it.

Right, but then it's shitty because it paints you in a way that's like, oh, you're just not down to participate with the show. It kind of looked like you were like the delinquent. And it's like, I love the show. I support them. I'll fucking fund it. I love them. I'm so proud of them. But everybody knew going into it that Tana was not going to climb no rock wall.

Like, it just like that, like, and it like broke my heart because the entire internet is like, why would you agree to the show if you weren't going to do physical challenges? I told them I wasn't going to do it. They still begged me to be on it. I said, okay, to, you know, come in for drama, chaos, fun shit, stir up shit with Bryce, whatever. And secondarily, anyone acts like if I were to win and take home that prize, that I'm

that anyone would be happy. - Yeah, I know. I feel like at that point everyone would have been like, there were so many people more deserving. - The cancellation would have been 10,000 times worse

Yeah, and then it's like, I climbed that rock wall for nothing if I'm going to still lose the game. So you might as well just get ahead of it and not climb. I can't fucking climb. Like, imagine me. I can't climb either. Imagine me like, I'm like, shut up, Miley. Like, grab it. Like, I'm not doing that. I can barely fucking walk on a fucking treadmill. Like, hello. And the entire internet is so mad at me for not doing the physical challenges. And I'm just like,

That's, babe, like I said, I punched myself in the face to get out of field day in middle school. I've been like this since birth. And I was, I made every single person in the production of that show well fucking aware of that. And everyone wants me dead because I didn't fucking rock climb. I'm like, baby, clear your name. She was never going to climb. Also, even if I did climb, I would have placed last. Yeah, that would, see, I watched the episode, baby. Me and my roommate sat there. We watched it. We were so entertained.

After I saw it, good news is they had that literal Spider-Man climb the wall. It's like, after that, why would anyone climb? It's like, baby, I know I'm not going to be faster than that. So it's like... Buenos Aires World from the San Diego Zoo Wildlife Alliance. I'm Marco Wendt. And I'm Rick Schwartz.

And we're your hosts for season three of Amazing Wildlife, a show from iHeartRadio Ruby Studio and the global conservation organization behind the San Diego Zoo and the San Diego Zoo Safari Park. Listen as we dive into the efforts here in San Diego and spotlight the heroes working worldwide to care for the species you know and love. Listen to Amazing Wildlife on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

please listen to this it's my favorite thing i've ever heard in my entire life so you guys saw lila on the podcast before right and you know she does her sugar daddy thing right we're sitting at brunch and i'm like i already have to leave within 10 minutes i went there to take a couple shots and like be tipsy for the podcast i ended up getting really drunk but that's why i went there and i'm sitting with lila and she's on the phone with his daddy she like answers the phone and she goes

- Hi, I'm so sorry. I was just in school. I've been doing three years at UCLA. School is the most important. - Wait, that's admirable, but. - School is the best thing in the world to me. It's the only thing that matters. Like you can have fun, but education is the number one point. - That is so true, Laila.

Lila's never set foot in a school in her fucking life. She's sitting there telling this man how much she loves going to UCLA for 30 fucking minutes at this brunch. She's never. No, Lila's a businesswoman. Listen to her. Now she's more respectable in his eyes. Now he's going to think of her differently. She's brilliant. No, but it's just absolutely fucking insane. And she's right. She's just like,

lying she just maxed out a different sugar daddy's card too on 10 000 can we talk about this for eight seconds ten thousand dollars in postmates oh no are we gonna get her sent to prison she's setting herself to prison

I took one look at her fucking 16 foot Christmas tree and I was like, hmm. What are you postmating to spend $10,000 on postmating? She'll postmates like a couch. She'll postmates things I didn't even know you could postmates. She went to my makeup artist house like last week and my makeup artist had like a LED fireplace that she got on Amazon installed. Super cute. Lila orders it, gets there the next day, realizes she can't set it up and throws it away. Hmm.

throws it in the trash can lila come on i'm like no come on i've been i've been with you since the jump no lila she's just she's just insane i want her on the podcast soon like honestly she's got some stories right now she does just every time i talk to her she's like the most entertaining person we had her at my little birthday thing the other night and she literally every single person there was like why don't you bring lila around more she's perfect it's funny because i have certain friends though who are like scared of lila

She's very, very abrasive. Like if you're not down for the crazy friend, like Josie, for example, Josie will not step. She's terrified. It's funny. Like it's very different. I'm going to Miami with Laila this week. You are. Can we talk about that?

I'm not going. I canceled. That's what I want to talk about. Sorry. Here's the thing. So you guys know a couple of podcasts ago, the one that made Hunter want to die, the Tao podcast. And I'll do it. Yeah. We talked about that billionaire. Right. That we were kind of on the finesse vibe of. I love him. I think he has a great personality. Do you? I do. I do. I actually do. He does. He does.

It's just different when he's in love with you. Yeah, I do get that. I get the ick from anyone who gives me like, don't talk to me. Basically this billionaire. And I love him. And if you're watching this, I fucking love you. I'm going to Miami with him on Wednesday. Right. And I think he wants to marry me. And it makes life a little hard for me. It does. He actually, you actually accepted his marriage proposal in the group chat. He did propose to me and I said yes. But also like, it's just very...

Hard for me. It's a lot of banter, I think. And it's like funny and it's like, ha ha. But then when it comes down to it, it's like, oh. Until it's not. But point being is Wednesday at 8 a.m. I am going on his plane to Miami. Yes. And Brooke.

canceled was canceled love the plug i was on the plane and i'm actually disappointed because we were in a group chat it's like five of us in the group chat and i had four of the numbers the fifth one i was unsure of so i texted hunter and i was like hey who's this fifth person in the group chat and he goes jordan belfort no i'm sick i'm like not the wolf no i'm fully about to be on a plane with the wolf of wall street snoop dogg's son

influencers and these billionaires. Cordell and Snoop Dogg. I went to high school, like grew up with him though. So I've known him forever. So it's not that weird, but I'm saying like,

We're all supposed to go on this plane to Miami. It was me, Brooke Hunter, these two billionaires, Snoop Dogg's son, Tessa Brooks, Bryce, which I just found out is going on this plane. Well, if I knew Bryce was coming, I'm pretty sure Bryce took my spot, right? No, no, no. Who took my spot? Ari. Ari, because once you canceled, I put Ari on the plane. But point being is we were all supposed to go on this jet to Miami. Brooke just canceled.

Sorry. And I understand you hate Miami. That's like a whole thing. Like Miami is my favorite place in the world and it's your least favorite place. Correct. Why is it your least favorite place before I've only ever had terrible experiences? I believe it. I think it's I like Miami so much because I'm from Vegas. My truth is that I don't I don't enjoy drinking when it's around people. I don't know. I like I love I love drinking.

get one thing straight, love drinking, in environments where I have, like, a bunch of my friends and, like, whatever. And, like, Miami, of course, like, you guys are going to be there, but it's, like, I don't have control over what everyone's doing. And, like, if I'm just, like, in a club and 99.9% of the people there, I don't know them. So you're just, like, fuck it. I'm, like, what?

Why am I doing it? I've also made so much of a life in Miami for myself that like I go there and I see so many of my friends. And I'm sure if I gave it a fair chance and like, I just, I kind of go into it every time assuming that I'm going to hate it and then of course I do. Well, Miami's also very chaotic and I think you're more like planned and LA is like a more chill vibe. Yeah, I want to be like in a confined environment of like seven people and like blacked out.

And Miami's such a vibe of like everyone's on like Molly and like no one like, you know what I mean? And I don't, I hate, I don't like, I loved it when I moved here to LA but like,

now clubbing it's like I can't hear you I can't see you I can't like why what's the fun in this and I'm like clubbing I'll die on the table and be happy and it's also like I grew up in Vegas and Miami in my opinion is entirely Vegas with the beach so it like serves me very much like hometown vibes like let's be crazy like whatever so I love Miami but I get it you hate it I do love like a boat vibe I would love to just like be on a yacht

Well, hi. You can still come. Please. I can't still come. They gave my spot away. I don't care. I'll literally take it away from someone else. Like Bryce, suddenly you're flying jet blue. Like, I don't care. I want Bryce on the flight.

light true someone else i don't even know but i mean point being is brooke bailed on the miami trip so did hunter i'm not like i'm not hating i'm just saying it's like a primary now i'm going yeah true you're not gonna go without hunter but i'm saying point being is now i'm on this jet with these fucking billionaires and all these random people and whatever and like i love miami but i was just in vegas for five days i really don't want to go yeah it's gonna be really like overwhelming i

I really don't want to go. I really, really, really do not want to go. But the billionaire, the guy that we've talked about who's paying for it. All of us are still unsure about whether or not he's a billionaire, right? Right. He could be like a fat multimillionaire. I don't even know. But I'm saying. That's just where we settle. That's just his nickname at this point. But point being is he has verbatim told me like, I will cry myself to sleep if you do not go.

And like, I would love to not go, but I feel like I'm. Yeah, you can't bail. And honestly, I'm proud of you for acknowledging that. But you know, I really want to. I know. But now it actually is too late. It's too late and it's whatever. And worst. You poor thing. No, I'm like, so I'm sorry.

Stuck on this jet. Stuck on this jet with Jordan Belfort, Bryce Hall, and, like, a billionaire. But, no, I get it, though. Like, I mean, I didn't want to go, and I'm not going. But I had the good sense to know that I was going to cancel last minute, and I would rather do it earlier where they had time to fill my spot. 100%. But he told me from the jump, like, if you don't go, like, this is a miserable trip for me. And he's, like, paying for everything I'm doing. So I'm like, I should just go. And obviously there's... Well, it's going to be... You're going to have a great time, and you're going to, like, be glad that you went. But it's just, like, the getting there that is, of course, like...

I just want to puke at the thought of Miami right now because I just did Vegas, and I'm so sad. Oh, you better take a week off. I'm like, I hope you rest this week. Buenos dias, world, from the San Diego Zoo Wildlife Alliance. I'm Marco Wendt. And I'm Rick Schwartz.

And we're your hosts for season three of Amazing Wildlife, a show from iHeartRadio Ruby Studio and the global conservation organization behind the San Diego Zoo and the San Diego Zoo Safari Park. Listen as we dive into the efforts here in San Diego and spotlight the heroes working worldwide to care for the species you know and love. Listen to Amazing Wildlife on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

I post all these TikToks alleging what I thought would happen with Bryant Laundrie. And a lot of the things I said came true. And I'm weirded out about it. Like I'm making a worldwide press where I need to read you this. Let me read you this article. Tana Mongeau's TikTok just solved the missing murderer Bryant Laundrie case and it makes complete sense. Who wrote that? Right.

Right. Like someone who does not have accurate brain cells. I'm just saying. Not that I do. Wait, I want to write for the Daily Mail. What do you think? Tana Mongeau isn't just a social media superstar. She can now add professional private investigator. She wrote this. Like, right. Like, right. She's like, not only is she gorgeous and beautiful. Like, literally. Professional and private investigator to her resume. This sentence. I should have wrote it. Is there anything she can't do? Yes.

Yes. Like a lot. Like drive. Ride a bike. Okay. For months, the Brian Laundrie-Gabrie Petito murder case has captured headlines and ended in the finding of Laundrie's remains. Mosher just cracked open the case on her TikTok by providing a more than logical and plausible explanation of what happened to Brian Laundrie and his family's alleged involvement in the case. Hello? Huh? Like that's the point. Oh, that's crazy. Is saying that like what I...

It's just, I don't get it. Like, I just said that I felt like there was a chance that he might have attempted his own life, even though they were saying that he had passed away for random reasons. Okay. I believe that. I would kill myself if somebody was looking for me and I murdered my girlfriend. Yeah, like, what? I would. I'm just mad at the family, though, for not, like, helping. If you had a kid and your kid died.

committed murder on someone and you were like kind of aware of that would you not like I don't know it's hard to say it really is hard to say because it's like you don't know I don't know what it's like to have a kid and like love them that much

but it's true but i'm also very like i i already you know you're guilty like you don't know i'm the guilt guy got the guilt complex like that would kill me like knowing that's not doing anything about it like it would i wouldn't be able to do especially it's like if you love your son and your son has a girlfriend you love her too especially if she's been with him for years and one day why would you do that why would you fucking do that and it's like almost like

it's funny Amari's mom was just saying to me like if you ever went to jail I'd fucking like leave you there so that you learned like why the fuck you went to jail and you wouldn't do it again and it's kind of like I was like damn like love you mom wish you'd bail me out but like like fair because it's like if I fucking yeah that I mean yeah for sure I feel like a lot of like people are like that or like people who have to like see their kids go to prison and stuff they're like

Okay, well. Like, if you're innocent, okay, but if my kid killed someone, I kind of would be like, maybe go there. Maybe go to jail. Did you know what I just did? What? Exactly. Do you know, do you guys know what I just did? And you burped? I burped, and I was like, that's... See, but where does it go? Like, literally, just like, it just like, that's what, it comes, like, it's fine. You can go like this. And then you, like, swallow it? No, it doesn't, it like, it's just, you don't have to go...

No, I agree. I don't really make the noise. I'm like a type. Like, I get that. But you and I had a conversation once where I verbatim asked you, would you rather someone burp next to you or fart in your mouth? And you verbatim answered me that you would rather have someone fart in your mouth. Because farting isn't usually optional. Like, farting is usually like, okay, I had to do that. No, I almost feel like my asshole's on lock. Like, I could hold a fart for years. Okay, asshole Kegels, like...

I'm just saying, I can like really hold my farts and let it like out. Like a little. Yeah. I mean, not even that, like a, like it could just come out like without anyone knowing that burping, I'm almost like, I have to like do something. Okay. Well, I guess everyone's different, but me personally, I think the burping is a choice and I think farting is involuntary. But don't you feel like butthole hair, but not hair, sorry. Don't you feel like butthole air is way grosser or more gross? I'm sure it is. And I'm sure if we actually like, we crunched the numbers. Yeah.

It would like, I mean, it would probably be like right now. You'd rather me fart on you than burp on you. I mean, I prefer that you don't do it. Like it would be none of the above for me. That's not the question. Like if I sat on your lap right now, would you have me fart on you or burp on you? Fart. I would. I don't know why. I don't know. I think that's insane. I'd rather someone burp on me 10 times over. So when Brooke says that, it blows my mind. But none of my phobia is irrational and I know that.

No, but that's okay. I agree. I'd rather someone punch me in the face on some like crazy shit than like put a bug on me. Okay. So like I get it. Well, we know that from that story. Did you ever put out that story time? Which one? When you had the like your literal tooth fell out.

No, I was just going through it the other day. Basically, when I was dating Chris Miles, we were fucking. And she literally said, beat my ass. And he was like, no. Well, no. Like, obviously, everything was consensual. I just want to start it off by saying that. But we were fucking and I was like, hit me, hit me, hit me. And he was like, OK. And he kept hitting me harder and harder. But I kept saying, hit me harder. And eventually, this was a... The whole room looked like a murder scene. No, it was horrible. Like, eventually, he like slapped me in the face. And then one of my veneers... Well, she has faulty veneers, OK? Yeah, exactly. It's not like he like...

Broke her nose or something like she has faulty veneers. No 100% and so he slaps me my veneer comes loose and then I started gushing blood and it was completely in pitch black dark and

And so I was like sucking his dick. And in my head... I hated the hand motion. Visual listeners or visual viewers, I am so sorry. I'm sorry. So I'm sucking his dick. And in my head, I'm like, damn. I try to keep head like spitty. Like I always say, like it should be very spitty. You don't want any like friction. Should be the wettest you can make it. Give them that toothless, gagless, throat fuck wet 5,000. With that being said...

In my head, I was like, this is a little too lubricated. Right. And shit went by, whatever. And then eventually the light comes on and we look at the bed. Could you not tell? No, I promise. Especially with that iron deficiency. I feel like if you tasted blood, you didn't even know. I never tasted it. I promise you. But I wasn't hitting a taste vibe either. I was hitting like a...

oh right just mindless toothless gagless throat fuck got it and so basically we were fucking for like a really long time and then eventually the light comes on after we're done fucking and there's a pool of blood on the bed that's like I kid you not I wish we could flash up the photos it was

I have them. I have them, but it looks like someone got killed and I don't know if I want to show it. We've done enough to Chris Miles. Like, we do not need to put that on her. I'm just talking from, like, probably the width of my arms, like, fully extended. Looked like this couch, y'all, the bed. At least from, like, my wrist to my wrist. Like, this big, like, huge...

Pool of blood. Looks like someone died. And so I get up and I'm like, did I... And I just had my period and ended it. So I was like, there's no way. And then I walked to the bathroom in the room. And my tooth is spewing blood. I'm not talking like bleeding like down, like it's falling down. I'm talking like...

Like waterfall. Like out. Like fully out. Like spewing, spewing blood. And it's all over my body. I look like the movie Carrie. Or like fucking like what's it? Jennifer's body. Like down my entire mouth. Down my entire body. It's all over him. So I'm in the shower compressing my mouth. Like breathing.

Like because it's gushing blood. The doctor came. Washing our entire body. I call my dentist. I'm like scream crying because I'm bleeding everywhere and I'm like dizzy from the amount of blood I'm losing and that's not. Dizzy wines out now. That's not a dizzy wine pun. Like I'm actually like seeing stars. Like I'm losing so much blood. Like I'm spewing blood. Like no lie. Like I'm talking waterfall like completely. And so then my dentist and a doctor shows up. They like pack it but then for the next like

five days i'm just gushing blood like i'm clotting it every single second like i'm holding gauze to it every i have so many videos of it i filmed a story time about it but it is like it's kind of like a tough situation but when i got done with the story i just felt like i sounded like someone beat the fuck out of me yeah that's true and i know he never did like i like i was genuinely saying it was consensual and like a mishap happened with my tooth it could have happened like with her like

like nudging herself the wrong way but it was just well okay it took a little hit but I asked for it I said hit me like I wasn't like I wasn't saying like don't hit me I was saying hit me okay well I hope you're not having to say don't hit me

I'm just saying, I bled for days and days and days, and then I had to get my gums sutured. Not the sutures. I had to get my gums sewn back together and a new tooth put in. And that did happen during sex. Stop it, Tommy. Is that your probably, like, would you, like, note that as, like, your worst sex story? No. Oh, God. People kept asking us on Twitter our worst sex stories. Do you have one? What's your...

Oh, absolutely. And it's not even a sex story. I didn't even have sex with him. I told you this. Oh, baby, don't worry. So you knew about this. This was like at the beginning of mine and your friendship, like very beginning. You were doing you were still filming like Tana turns 21 and whatever trauma. And I remember one night you were like, hey, can you come film this? Like we're going to do like a girl's night out, like whatever. I was like, yes.

And so I went and I was like, you know what? This is going to be like a good pregame to hang out with this guy. And the whole night I'm drinking, I'm all excited to hang out with this guy because he's like – he's a musician and he's someone that I – like at the time I was a fan of. And you were a fan of him too. So I told you about it and you were like – but we kept in touch and he was talking to me all day long, like just being so sweet, like –

Like he'd call me like darling, whatever. He makes one of my favorite songs of all time. He does. And he's amazing. He's from another country. And so he has like a perfect, like beautiful accent. And he makes these like amazing love songs that are like so romantic, whatever. So you're like, this guy's like a romantic. Like he's going to be like such a sweetheart, whatever. Calls me one day in the middle of the day, like 11 a.m. And he's like, middle of the day. It's kind of dawn to me. That's bedtime for Tana. Yeah.

And he's like, like, hey, babe, like, like, would you want to hang out today? Like, we could just like have a drink, whatever. Like, just like just like a casual day. And I was like, you know what? Yeah, I go over there. I've never met this man. I go over there in my pajamas. We'd only ever talked on like Instagram and text now. But like, but like, we've never like met. We've never FaceTimed nothing.

And I go over to his house and he's so sweet at first, like whatever, for the first like maybe 10 minutes tops. Yeah. 10 minutes in, this man jumps me. Like he's like just...

Not like he doesn't beat my ass, but he's like all of a sudden just so aggressively like making out with me. And that was like not my vibe. Like, babe, it's new. Yeah. Like I wanted to have like a cup of tea. Like sweet kiss. Like maybe a shot. And he's like trying to hook up with me. And I was like kind of trying to like and it's not like like I wasn't like non-consensual. I don't want to make it like a scary story like that. It wasn't that way. But he goes. He's just a little too aggressive in your head. He goes, call me master. I go, what?

He said that? Yes. And it's crazy too because I don't want to talk too much about his music, but it's very simp. Like, I love women. Just sweet, like very wholesome. Like I've, oh. His music's so wholesome. I don't, it was, it was like master or like something. And every time I would say something, he'd be like, or like, he'd be like, good girl, good girl. And I'm like, don't.

Don't do that at all. I love a good, good girl after you've bought me a gift. I just met this man. This is our first encounter. Like that's weird. You're weird. He doesn't know where I'm from yet. Yeah, so maybe say you're like a weird masochist if that's what you want. Yeah, but like, you're brave as fuck if you're going to do that the first, like the first 10 minutes of meeting someone. Like baby, all I have to do is tweet it. And I think you're a weird fucking narcissist. Like, and it wasn't even just like limited to like sexual activity at all. It was literally like,

Can I have a water, master? Yes. That was an actual thing that happened. I'd be like, do you have like a glass of water? And he'd be like, master. Master.

Stop. I want to. And that's so out of character for me, too. I'm not even like a dirty talker at all. I am very like, like, unless it's like, like somebody that like. Can't relate. I'm a whore. But I mean, no, but also in that moment, I would have been like, can I have a fucking water? You weird. Yeah. And I'm just like, and then like to top things off, we're just like, we're hanging out like, like kind of hooking up a little. He's playing his own Pandora station.

Like his own music is coming on. I also don't care. He's like... I don't care if you're literally Justin Bieber. I don't care if you're Justin Bieber. Do not play me your own music ever. That is the one thing that I will say. I like... The man I'm in love with is a musician and I...

don't play me your own music ever. I could not agree with you more. Send it to me and I'll listen to it by myself but if I'm gonna have to you're gonna have to watch me listen to it and I'm gonna have to think about how I'm responding if I'm doing the right thing making the right faces don't do that to me. And it's fine if we're like friends or if it's like over time you're like I made this song can I please show you it? But first date you're like check this one out and it's like nine songs and

you know my type is entirely musicians so I've dealt with this so much it makes me want to jump off the Empire State like when you sit down with a guy and he's such a fucking narcissist it's just me it's like it's my it has nothing to do with them it's like 90% of the time it's like okay I'm gonna love the song and I'm gonna like you know what I mean it's not that it's just awkward trying to react I feel nervous like am I like am I am I bobbing my head enough like

Like, what am I doing? And then, like, God forbid, too, when it's terrible. And you're just like... And you're like, I love it. And I can't lie. That's the problem. I can lie, and I love lying. But in those situations...

In those situations, I don't want to lie. I want you to suffer for what you just did to me. 100%. It's trauma. I've dealt with that with like 30 people, unfortunately, because I just attract narcissists who make either good music or horrible music. It's really tricky. And I feel bad because I don't want any of my friends to ever think like, oh, I can't show you anything. But it's just like,

Like, especially if I'm talking to you or whatever. And like you said, it's how you do it. If you're like, okay, I need your critiques. That's one thing. But if you're like, check out this song. It just means. No, exactly. It's like one thing that if I know you and you're like, I heard this music. But when you sit down with a guy on a first date and he's a musician, he's like, I just made this shit. It's fun.

and then shows you nine songs after that. It's like beep, beep. You're like, I get it. And you're like, bitch, shut up. I get it, but like, chill the fuck out. Like, it's just such a thing with musicians because like a lot of times it's self-assessment. Well, it's the same, but like, not that I'm, I'm like, I'm not much of an artist myself, but imagine if I sat down with a guy and was like, oh my God, how funny is this TikTok I just made? Like, it's just like, it's exactly like, I just think that extreme narcissism is not it. And they're like,

It's so funny. Like, no, that's embarrassing. And you can laugh at it on your own time. But like, I don't want you to have to laugh at it in front of me. Should we go? Should we go on a throuple date? I just sent you flowers and said that I'd love to have a threesome with you soon. She sent me flowers. The card said at least I could do something on time. And it was a day late. Dude, but I'm not going to lie. I paid an exponential amount of money for it to be on time. So I blame the flower company. You door dashed them. They were from door dash. Oh, then that's on Kyla. I paid. I knew it.

I paid $150 extra for it to be there on your birthday. I got the door dash notification. She door dashed them. That's on Kyla. Second sentence, though. Second sentence, though. I sent you flowers. I asked you to have a threesome with me. That was very sweet. Okay.

I love this Brooke and Tana cast and I will eat your butthole later and I would die for Brooke and we're killing it at the canceled shit. So now I'm going to fuck off because I'm drunk, but I love you. Love you too. Can't wait for our next threesome. I would die for you. Thanks for tuning in to this week's episode of Canceled. Tana Mosher is canceled. A DWE Talent Production.

Buenos dias, world, from the San Diego Zoo Wildlife Alliance. I'm Marco Wendt. And I'm Rick Schwartz.

And we're your hosts for season three of Amazing Wildlife, a show from iHeartRadio Ruby Studio and the global conservation organization behind the San Diego Zoo and the San Diego Zoo Safari Park. Listen as we dive into the efforts here in San Diego and spotlight the heroes working worldwide to care for the species you know and love. Listen to Amazing Wildlife on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.