hi and welcome back to the cancelled podcast i'm shooting up heroin today welcome back to the cancelled podcast okay i'm kidding today is an i'm the most excited for this episode that i've been for any episode i am too i'm excited that you chose right now to drink for the first time so today is day 75 of 75 hard and i am enthralled i am just i'm beside myself drink up and
Oh, I was gonna, I was gonna do this whole speech about how like life has been so good and I feel like I found myself and you know that, but now I just want to try. I think it's been amazing. I think that you have like really, really grown into yourself. 75 days of growth. Yeah. We were just sitting here, um, talking and I said dichotomy and you were asking me to explain it to you. And when I was, she said, she said it was the juxtaposition of good and bad, right?
Or opposites. Good and bad is kind of wrong. Like it's just it's more like yin and yang type of thing. Well, I told her I don't know what juxtaposition means. But I was saying that directly after this episode, I'm going to go back to just being so stupid. I feel like I've been so smart and sharp for the past 75 days. I'm eager to see if like if you're going to be like an extreme drunk or if all of a sudden you're going to be like really like.
I don't know why you would be composed, but... I know. That's the thing. I'm actually really scared to drink for the first time and, like, bring it back into my life because I felt so great, but so bored, you know? Do you think that you'll carry this? Like, do you think you'll try to be sober more often or, like, try to drink less? Absolutely. I think that bender, wild Tana has to be put to rest...
Because she's gonna put herself to rest If she doesn't chill I think so too We were talking about it the other day We were talking about it the other day And I was saying like Well you could just go out and like
two drinks, but I do understand that it doesn't work that way for some people. I suggested she get on like some sort of antidepressant. You're not even depressed, but that makes it so you can't drink more than two drinks. Really? Why? I don't know. I just get like so ill. Like you feel sick when you're on antidepressants? Yeah. Like if I drink more than like three drinks, I will like be throwing up for three days straight. Is that true? Is anyone else here on antidepressants? I can drink so much. Sorry.
Natalie walks in here a few minutes ago. We go, or Tana goes, should we have a glass of wine? Natalie goes, I've had three. She just came from work.
Are you scaring the shit out of me right now? He's sleeping, sitting up with his eyes closed. And it's like actually a very scary thing. We have a giant live studio audience today. We are joined with Amari, Isabella, Ashley, Ty, Ari, Natalie and Trevi and Oscar and Aaron. It's making me nervous. We have a mic over there. If anybody does want to chirp in or chime in, just make it good because God, it'd be awful. You know, why did I look right at you, Ty, when I said that?
I was kidding. I feel like he's going to have some good one-liners for us. Yeah, if you have anything good and you want to throw it in, guys, let us know. I think I exhausted all my jokes before you got up here. I was like testing things out and I could tell it was really funny because Ty was laughing at all. We have such an amazing set of topics today, though. Like a lot has happened in the past week, which I'm really excited to dive into. I know that. So basically today is day 75 of 75 hard. And I've always planned to have a sip of a drink.
To celebrate On day 75 But now I'm sitting here And this glass of wine Is in front of me This is crazy I feel nervous And I feel like
it's a little sad I'm like rest in peace like sober Tana obviously Coachella is coming up I'm like and I'm going to Vegas this weekend you don't want that to be your first like major drinking episode though because that could make it a lot of episode for a lot of people for a lot of people Jeff was telling me yesterday like he was like I just he was like talking about how I'm gonna be crazy at Coachella and I was like yeah I really I don't want to be like awful for you you know sometimes I feel like Coachella can be like it's
Really spread out So I almost feel like You know when you day drink And you drink all day long And you almost feel like You're just not even drunk anymore Yeah But I She's like No Yeah but The person I become at Coachella Last Coachella I was Dude Like we've been Adding up the prices of things And last Coachella I was just like so drunk And like very much In a mindset of just like Fuck it Like we ball That's always kind of How I've done Coachella Cause I always Fuck it we ball Like that's always How I've done Coachella Because
I want to go You know what I mean And I'm like Oh my god I want to go Let's do it And I like Purposefully will be good For a couple months before And then know I'm going to like Ball out And this year I didn't really want to go It just ended up Like happening for work And so I've been having Paige Really like Actually tell me How much things cost
And like that is it is easy sometimes to just like, OK, like this and this and like like not realize how much you're spending. But it is crazy. That's why I'm not going this year, because I was like, if there's not someone I actually not one person on the lineup, I want to see why am I spending so much money? And you I know you spend way more than I do. I spent fifty thousand dollars on Las Coachella. I don't even have fifty thousand dollars, which is so fucking fucked up. I just that's insane. That's really sad. The teachers like who listen to this podcast are like,
That's what I make in three years. I know I don't deserve it, though. I'm so open about that. I've always said. You deserve it. I mean. No, like a stupid Vegas hooker turned influencer does not deserve to make the amount of money I make. You're not stupid. But if I'm going to say that, I should give to charity. So maybe I'll do that later. Okay, we'll do that after this. Anyway, have a sip. Do I drink? Yes. Should we establish something before it?
You know what Natalie just told me? I think I have to do it. Natalie just told me that she already emailed the brand of wine we're drinking to tell them that we could give them an exclusive for this episode. Natalie, that's so lit. Me forgetting about Dizzy. Oh, wait, that's so, oh my God. This is insane. This is insane. Okay, what are we, no, no, no. What are we cheersing to? No, I'm just smelling it. Oh, well, I want to, okay. You go ahead, smell it. Let me know when you're done.
I'm so scared. Cheers to canceled podcast launching worldwide and hopefully for the next couple years tonight at midnight. Yeah, I'm so excited. But also cheers to 75 Days of Sobriety. I'm actually very proud of you and you are amazing and your reputation has shown for it. Are y'all ready for Awful Me? No. Like, literally no. Like, Chris Miles, if you're watching this, like, shut your phone off, you know? Woo! Woo!
i forgot what wow oh god i'm kidding dude we were just downstairs and i facetimed hunter and i was like it's day 75 and hunter flips the camera and just puts on the i hate people i love them video on his tv as a reminder amari just made a joke like what what if she just already started downstairs and she came upstairs and like blacked out
Absolutely. What if I told you guys right now I was just drinking the whole time? No, y'all would know, unfortunately. That's one thing about me is I just can't hide it. I know.
Like hats off to the people who can But that I honestly will say That that sometimes is a blessing Because I'm a little different now But I feel like I used to be where You couldn't tell where I was drunk And I would be saying things I shouldn't say But in like the same way Such a sober way Yeah And it would get me in trouble Pages like that She could take like 30 shots And be like I'm blacked out But she's like perfectly fine Yeah and you can't tell But that's how you get yourself in trouble Because people would be like You were sober and you said this And I'm like I was not there For me like the mind scares
Stays before the slur Like that's like I'm gonna start slurring right now From that one sip I think I am You are a major slur But I've noticed I started slurring recently Really? I'm a new slur Really? Yeah I like it I think it's quirky Anyway tell me what you've got On our list of topics I have such a fucking Fantabulous list of topics I just remembered that You and I are in a fight You and I are in a fight? Yes
But like a fight Like a Like you saved it For the podcast That's how I I can test the severity Of how fighty the fight is Because if you save it For the podcast Like I'm in the clear You know Why am I like trembling Okay you guys I was tagged in a video The other day One of those videos Where it's like You know like those Celeb face accounts Where it's like It shows the before And after of editing Like
I was tagged in a photo and it was a photo of you and I Okay And it shows like the before editing and after Uh huh And you edited both of us bless your heart You made my waist a little smaller She made my tits smaller Wait what? Show me the pic
I literally The only thing that Changed is that You brought my waist In a bit Do you think I was It's like way smaller I was like I would never And have never And I put this Should we see if it was Paige Paige Wait show I have never And would never do that to you Was I refining myself And your tits got caught In the aftermath No it was like Someone went in Blurred my cleavage Made them smaller I would never do that to you And I promise that Hmm I want more likes
Okay, that's fair. But I was just wondering if you had it out for me or not. I don't have it out for you, but this is the funniest thing ever. And it looks like I do, but I'm actually like not. I really didn't do that. I don't know. I can't remember who sent it to me. Are you making this up? I would never make such a thing up. That's why she's getting the boob job. Yeah, Brooke, this is a perfect segue. You know what? This is what did it to me. I saw this photo that you edited of me and I thought my boobs should be bigger, so I scheduled my boob job. I can't believe you're getting a boob job. Okay, I'm not getting a boob job.
Paige. Paige. Watch my boobs get smaller. Or a fan account like Tana Spendy. Sorry, Tana Spendy. Girl, these are on your feed. Yeah, but like from her. I would never make your boobs smaller and I mean that. One sec.
Honestly, that whole segment was worth her just saying that. Anyway. But speaking of, you're getting a boob job. I don't know that I'm getting a boob job. Originally, here's the situation. You have the biggest, nicest tits. That's not true anymore. And there's... Listen. Like, I'm wearing a mattress firm right now. You could shoot me in the tit and it would be like a bulletproof vest with how much is really going on in here. Safety first. But I just...
just don't i mean you know i'm 26 years old approaching 27 okay and they just don't hang like they used to gravity is kicking in there's like a little bit of a stretch mark situation they're like going right left if i lay down one of them touches each side of the bed it's crazy i really want you to lay down right now and show us i sent you guys a picture in the group chat did you
But I went on a trip. I went to Hawaii with a couple friends of mine. And this girl was there. And she had a similar situation where she, like, lost weight. And her boobs just went down to her knees. Yeah. That's kind of what happened to me. And she just, you know, she filled them up a bit. And she looks amazing. And so I... Breast implants scare me. Like, I would get any plastic surgery in the world. They do scare me because I know, like, a lot of people have, like, the breast implant illness or whatever. And it's, like, really... No, it's actually... It's really common. A lot of people get it. Ashley, don't you, like, what... You want to talk about it at all? What do you think?
That is a really good point. She said she would rather have have to be depressed than be depressed with no tits. That's very fair. So I don't know. It's still it's still a thought. I haven't like scheduled it or anything. I just wish they still looked like they did two years ago. I am down to have a month where we post on social media on our Instagram stories and we're like taking a break from the world, like really just like want to meditate and like Zen and like, but we just get like crazy BBL. And then we go to Korea and we go to the ID hospital and I come back with like a new forehead.
Like I want to go rogue on plastic surgery. I think they would know. Yeah, but I'll just be like, I'm just so woke now. Just like not even. That's what all these other bitches do. I feel like I would have to tell the truth. Yeah, that is like an important thing in life. You know what I mean? Yeah. That's really fair. The other night we went to a Mod Sun concert.
And backstage, you were telling a story that was really, really, really funny that I really... Before we get into the Mod Sun concert of it all, because I'm sure I'm not going to get off scot-free. Emphasis on we were at a Mod Sun concert. Let me just let...
Let that sink in, guys. That was so fun, by the way. Like, I was actually, like, I had an amazing, amazing time. You know, I was so, so nervous to go. I hadn't, like, seen Mod Sun in, like, three years. Yeah. And, listen, I want you guys back together. That's my personal opinion. I don't know what the audience thinks, but I don't know. I feel like sober Tana, sober Mod Sun. Well, yeah.
You know, Tyga and Avril are off somewhere doing something. I don't know what they're talking about. But I had a great time at the show. But backstage, you were talking about something that sent your bank account balance under. Okay, so...
I'm not the most financially responsible person in the world. Natalie can attest. Like, I feel like the second I do a brand deal, I have the money. Yeah. Okay. And I don't. You don't. Yeah. A lot of brand deals that you do, it's like net 90, net 60. Sometimes it's 30 days. Sometimes it's... Is that a litter box? Nope. Sometimes it's 30 days. Sometimes it's 30 days.
Sometimes it's 30 days, sometimes it's 60, sometimes it's 90. And so I'll think I have all this money and I spend it like I have it because I know it's coming. Yeah. But then inevitably, like every couple months, I'll text Natalie and I'll say, is anyone going to pay me? Like, I don't have any money left. Yeah. And she'll be like, what? Something seriously wrong with you? But I realized I really had a problem the other day when my account balance went below zero. Okay. Yeah.
If it was just like a purchase of mine, it would be one thing. But what set you over? I was afraid to even check. I went in to my little Bank of America app and I'm like, what did it? You know, what pushed me over? Netflix, maybe. It was a little girl I'm sponsoring in the Philippines for $30 a month. Like out of the goodness of my heart, I started sponsoring this little girl. It's only a dollar a day. But I need a sponsor.
So like what she didn't eat this much? She ate but I couldn't. Wait I'm seriously crying. Her name is Marianne she's 45 pounds. Gulls. And I literally. Natalie did you just say gull? Fucking. What? So Marianne had prime rib. Oh my god.
Anyway, I'm working on my spending habits. Marianne. Oh, Marianne. Listen, better her than me, okay? I wasn't spending it wisely. Hopefully she is. In the last episode, we were kind of just talking about my love life and how I was like, you know, being a little too close with my fuck buddy and whatever. And then I was telling you how I went on a date with a different guy.
Like right before that Are you still Do you still feel that way About this fuck buddy Or are you We'll get into that We'll get into that But um Right after we stopped Filming the last episode My fuck buddy Sent me a selfie With the guy That I went on a date with And they were together And like hanging out And like talking about me See that shouldn't Have to happen In one of the biggest Cities in the world You know what I mean I think that's an us problem Like I think we are Doing something wrong For sure I'm for sure In my whore era Okay Like
And by whore, I mean single. By whore, I just mean single. Yeah, I kind of feel that way too. I'm like having fun. I'm finally back dating again and like mentally like, okay. So I'm... That's how I feel. Like I'm just having fun. I'm dating and I'm having a good time. You know what I mean? I do agree. But...
I just want to make sure we eventually get back to you going to a Mod Sun show. I repeat. Like I said, I'm having a good time. Okay. What kind of good time exactly? Like a good nostalgic time where you get back together. It is nostalgic. I kept saying this the other night because we obviously, before the show, were spending a lot of time with Mod's friends who I love.
And his sister and like everyone And I hadn't seen them I was telling Maude this I was like I've never had a breakup with someone That was clean other than you I love a little chit chat with my ex's post breakup I love a little reduce, reuse, recycle, run it back turbo I love a little moment like that You know what I mean? And Maude is the only person I've ever dated Where it was like we broke up And we blocked each other And by blocked each other I mean he blocked me And what
We listen I get it we never talked again you know so it is nostalgic and I kept saying that the other night that I felt like we just like transported back to like 2019 in a good way well that's what's good about a clean break I almost feel like you guys can just pick up right where you left off there wasn't all this like messy well yeah yeah except for the songs and the videos yeah oh and his engagement to someone else you're so right but he's I I just feel like he's such a good guy for you why why
Because I don't know He's my only Or like the only boyfriend I've seen you have Where I'm like wow this guy like might make her Better like he's like he's sober He's really nice he loves like he's so good To all your friends He's just like a good guy He is a good guy And not that any of your other exes weren't But like some of them had some like you know deficiencies For sure I mean yeah I'm really happy we went to the show I wouldn't hate to see you guys reunite Obviously you know that's going to be Ultimately up to you
Did he sleep over last night? I have no idea why you'd ask that. Speaking of your exes...
Jake Paul has a new girlfriend and she looks exactly the same as Josie Canseco. I guess that would mean the Paul brothers have similar taste in some regard, right? Yeah. I actually like hot take here. I really kind of ship it. Like I think as much as I can. I think so too because they're I mean she's she's an athlete like really. And I think that's really cool like to see him not with like an IG baddie not with someone in the
She is an IG baddie, but she's an she is also an athlete. Yeah. And not someone in the influencer space. I think he's an athlete now. And I think it's like I think it's dope. You know what I mean? I don't know. I think with his last ex-girlfriend, it was hard for me to be more like peaceful about it because there was a time where I felt like there was a bit of crossover and back and forth with her and I. So it was like I would see that and kind of just be like, you know what I mean? I get that. I have a major issue with.
Or like, I think it hurts more to see your ex move on with somebody who like is in any way similar to you.
Not that she's really that similar. She's not, but like does the same thing. Like, you know, you know what I mean? Like I would rather them move on with somebody who's so opposite for me so I can be like, oh my God. I just wasn't their type. I will never be an Olympic skater, you know, and I can sleep with that. You will not, but we did get skates. I got us skates. You got us rollerblades? Well, they were gifted, but. They were gifted by my soulmate's best friend. They were. Which is just like, that's why he's my soulmate. Like, why would you let your best friend give me roller skates? You know?
That is major boyfriend stuff. I have a lot of random shit if you're ready to get into like, do you ready to get into random shit? Absolutely. I actually want some off camera opinions on this as well. Paige has a theory that has been altering the way I sleep at night. Do you want to, do you want to, you don't want to come on like this, do you? No, I love like this. That was a low blow. Oh.
And the way she assumed, she said, you don't want to come on. Well, if this bitch doesn't have like a smoky wing and a blazer on, she's not coming on anybody's podcast. You know what I mean? Paige has this theory that all men cheat, that all men would cheat. There's not a man out there in the world that
That wouldn't cheat if they were in her theory. She attests this theory that if any man, any boyfriend in the world is locked in a room with Margot Robbie, he's cheating. I'm letting him cheat then. But I think I do. Oh, well, of course. So she's saying if he makes a move on him, every single man ever is folding every time. And Margot Robbie can be replaced, obviously, with his number one celebrity crush. Yeah.
So I think I do like I don't want to agree because I like I want to believe in like true love and like whatever. But I I think specifically like right now, like with social media and everything like in recent years now, it's almost like it feels impossible. Like maybe back in the day when there wasn't as much opportunity, like you couldn't just like.
access as many people as you can now and like you can't sneak around and sneaky dm somebody i will say i have like i feel like i've been in well a one singular relationship but in that whole time i couldn't have even thought about it because it's like i'm so obsessive that i'm like i can't i don't think about anyone else but i don't know i don't know i would like i'm cheating but we all knew that yeah you cheat
I have like a that's like a major conflict of interest in like our friendship because I'm so I am so against cheating and you're just like a cheater wait I thought you just said that pick me to love me I thought you just said that she just said that I have been loyal and I have been
I've been loyal in a few relationships in my life. She's like, I'm loyal to all your friends. I was loyal to you for a cheater, but then when I said it, I'm going to pick me. If you were like, oh my God, I look fat today, and I was like, yeah, you look fat today, would you be like, that's cool? Oh my God, I know you would never cheat. Like literally, I know you wouldn't. I'm kidding for the most part. I've been in several relationships where I haven't cheated. I believe that about you. I didn't cheat on Modson. I didn't cheat on Brad Sousa. You should have.
And I should have and that's really what I learned. You literally should have. I will say I've only ever cheated on someone if they were like super emotionally abusive or like awful. Yeah. Because I have a problem with breaking up with people. Like if I break up with someone and they're like no I'm like okay. So but then I'm like okay. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Which is not good and I have grown from and I don't think I'll ever do it again.
I would like to think there are people out there that won't cheat. Like I'm hopeful about it because if I get cheated on again, honestly in life, I think I will probably die, but I'm not opposed to getting like a divorce. Like if someone cheats on me, I'll get a divorce and I'll get married again. That's fair. Would you get married multiple times? I think I will get married multiple times. I don't,
No I actually don't think there's That's on my list of things to ask you about I don't think that's like shameful really like especially today I love like Pamela Anderson I love that I think she's the blueprint Well I've always said this but it wasn't until I was at her premiere recently and watching her documentary That I had like an out of body moment Where she was like I think life is just about love And just like try it and just like if it doesn't work Like just keep getting married and married and married And I was like
Whoa I did love that Because she didn't Like give up on it And she was still hopeful Each time Whereas like a lot of people Would be like I give up I hate this And that's how I am Like I think I would get married And as long as it was good It was good And I would do my best To fight for it But if it doesn't work Then it doesn't work And then I'm not I'm
I don't think I get discouraged. Like I've been cheated on. I've been in such toxic relationships. I've been like... But I love love so much and I feel like I'm the type of person that is very hyper aware of the fact that every person is very different. Is completely different. I agree with that. And obviously trust issues are a thing and I have those but I still think I can go into everything new whether it's friendship or anything like that with pretty open arms and recognition that each person is different. I feel... I agree with that. Like I assume the best... Like or...
Like, I just assume everyone's going to be good until they show me they're bad. Exactly. Like, I don't go into a relationship thinking, like, oh, he's going to be just, like, the last guy. Yeah. I probably should. Yeah. They're all the same. No one's going to be, like, your last guy. Speaking of that, something happened. Something did happen. Oh, my God. So, this past week. So, I went on the Zach Sang show. Yes, you did. And I fucking love Zach Sang. But he...
Amari doesn't Zach Sang's on my shit list right now And When I say that I'm not even talking personally Like he is one of the few Like interviewers That I looked up to for a long time Like the first time I ever went on his show I definitely felt very like
Undeserving Of being on his show He's a legend And He's like He really is like a legend At like what he does He's like the best interviewer He's amazing Getting the opportunity To go on his show Never doesn't feel Out of the ordinary And very exciting And I'm very grateful To go on it Because it's like Who'd you have before me Ariana Grande Like I don't Yeah Necessarily It feels like a big deal Yes exactly Thank you The drinking I'm already dumber No you're not No
No for sure Like when I was just saying all those things About like marriage and whatever Like the two last brain cells I have were like fighting I can feel it It's kind of scary So he invited me on a show the other day And I go over there And I'm so excited and I sit down And I feel like when I go on shows like that Also versus like
Maybe an influencers podcast or something like that. I become a little less reserved because I know that if I'm going to talk about something that people really want to know about or if I'm going to talk about something that's a hot and heavy topic or if I something I would want press around even or just anything in general, I'd rather do it there than anywhere else. Yeah. So and I kind of feel like Zach knows that like he knows me pretty well and we're pretty good like friends off camera. So I feel like he knows how much I care
love him and I'm excited to come on his show so I feel like he knows he can ask me anything and I'll like just give him my honest honest answer like so I sit down and we're talking about nice things like sobriety and you know life and cannabis and cancelled and all that type of stuff but then he kind of looks at me and he asks my opinion on being friends with David Dobrik while I'm friends with Jeff and normally when people answer that
I will give a pretty PR trained answer. I've talked about it a lot with Jeff on his podcast, but I don't just need to be going around on every podcast, like making that my thing because it's not really like that's Jeff's journey. And you know what I mean? Like I'll touch on it, but it's like, I don't really need to give my like full fledged opinion. But I was like, listen, if you're asking this right now, I'm going to answer it here over anywhere else. So I kind of give my answer and how I feel and whatever. And then I think you
Think you gave a really good and I mean You did a really good job I just gave My honest answer were like Disrespectful to anybody and I think That you like yeah handled it well I am But I do it from as a viewer anyway I Felt like it was kind of trying to Stir up like a controversy or like be Problematic yeah and obviously I was Kind of dodging that and giving my best Possible answers but I feel like after He saw me kind of openly answer the David question like
With full force. He felt comfortable enough to kind of fucking like be able to ask me anything. I don't even necessarily think it's because you answered it like that. I think he went into that interview knowing exactly what he was going to ask you and like how he was going to make the interview. I mean, that's why he's so good at...
What he does Is he makes The interviews viral And he asks all the Like hard hitting questions Which is great Yeah Until it's at the expense Of somebody else of course Yeah and I didn't really Know that was going to happen And I also go into interviews Like that kind of knowing Like things might not be cut
Like I kind of have to just answer With my best possible answer Because a friend Who's an influencer As a podcast Might be a little more lenient In allowing me to make edits Whereas a big established show This is a little more Like a traditional media You kind of know What you're signing up for Sitting down on a more Traditional media show Yeah That they kind of have Full jurisdiction on If they wanted to literally Use you saying I can't answer that Yeah Like you know what I mean So I'm not saying
I felt like it opened a door for him to ask me about my opinion on your previous relationship. Yes. And we've talked about it a lot off camera. Obviously, Zach and Isaac was a big pivotal point in you guys even getting together and your breakup. Yeah, he had a lot to do with like our like the beginning of our relationship because he was very, very close with my ex. And then I was like close.
close to zach we had like very close friends and we would all hang out together so that's he was like one of the first ones who was like you need to date this guy like he's amazing and so he was like i mean he was very much also a part of our relationship you know we would like if we went out to dinner we would go with them and like yeah he was very involved in the whole thing yeah and so or god and then he was very involved after the breakup also like very um
I mean, of course, I would talk to him about it because it was like a very specific situation. If you didn't see the Zach Singh episode. I basically just... He directly asked me about how I feel about the situation of Clinton Kane's parents allegedly being still alive and Clinton placating that... Placating the opposite of that online. Yeah, so obviously that's like a big part of his narrative. My ex says... Or all his music is about...
His family being dead and they are allegedly alive. And I feel very strongly about this. And I think that's maybe why Zach was like, oh, I'm going to ask Tana because he knows off camera like nothing has ever made me sicker in like the Hollywood space than that story, than that. I think...
First of all, I mean, I'm not mad at you, obviously. I think you spoke about it, like, very well. And you spoke about it with me in mind, which I appreciated. I don't feel necessarily the same about, like, the Zach situation just because he... I have been very adamant about, like, not wanting to talk about that online. Like, at all. Okay? If I wanted to talk about it...
Would be a big story I could talk about it here on Cancelled I would have come on here the first episode And just laid it all out That's a good story It's a true story and it's a good story Netflix even I just love that joke And if I wanted to do it I was going to do it And I feel like I've been I've gone back and forth There's been moments where I'm like I'm fully saying that online Because I get so fired up and upset About everything that happened And the lying and manipulation And stuff and I get like
Like high on it And I'm like Oh I'll say it online But at the same time It's like It was such a traumatic situation And I was so sad about it That I was like I don't want to talk about it online And ultimately I decided Like if I'm going to go up and down About it so much I'm never going to say anything publicly About it myself Because Yeah
And that's why I tried to speak as much as I could from my own personal thoughts on it. Yeah. And not yours. I never want to speak for someone else. I loved the way you spoke about it. Honestly, like I felt like you did a really good job. And I mean, that question was a bullet point on a piece of paper to ask you that day. And that's what I don't appreciate is like I wasn't there. Yeah. And I understand. I wasn't there. And it drags me into it when when.
Zach particularly knows I wanted nothing to do with like carrying out like that story. Yeah. Telling that story. I wanted nothing to do with that. Yeah. And it was not only told but told with my name. Attached to it. Attached to it. And like it as my relationship story and I wasn't there to speak for myself. I don't appreciate that at all. However. I understand that.
I will say I feel like relieved about it for sure. Like, I don't want to ruin anyone's reputation. I don't care like what they did to me. I wouldn't do it to you. I wouldn't do it to anyone here. Like, well, it's a fucked weight to carry. I think to know that and know that,
People don't know that you know what I mean And even I found myself Like feeling that way I referenced it on Zach saying but even like Seeing Alex Warren like feel some Type of way it affected a lot you Know how it affected me God and everyone knows how it Affected me specifically Zach knows how it Affected me everyone knew and Like everyone here can attest like it was A really traumatic and like Horrible situation yeah
So like obviously I'm better now and like I feel okay now and like I have to talk about it now because it's like otherwise the only narrative that's out there I have nothing to do with. Yeah. But I just I think it was slimy the way that it came about for sure. And you obviously have your truth and your side to that story and that is completely on you if and when you wanted to tell that, you know? Yeah. There are like elements to that obviously that I'm never going to say like
At all. Yeah. But what I was trying to say before is like, I do feel like some sense of relief just that like, I'm like, okay, okay. There we go. Like, cause that, you know, that was so much of it. Like, of course I was really, really sad about the breakup. Like as anyone would be,
In a breakup. But like. I couldn't say. Anything online. About like. What happened. I said. I said. He cheated on me. Yeah. And that's like. That's a hard enough thing. To deal with. And then. Yeah. But it's like. The way that I reacted. To that breakup. And how much it affected me. Did not match. He cheated on me. You know what I mean. And like. There was. It was this huge. Like.
extreme like lie situation that was like so much bigger than that and like I couldn't talk about it so now I feel a little bit better that I can be like okay this is why it was so crazy yeah and I think that all Zach should decide we both kind of knew that at some point it was going to come out and at some point you and I would have this conversation truthfully I like I wanted almost not that I never wanted it to come out in my perfect world I wanted no one to ever know about it I don't know why I feel that responsibility to like protect him or like
salvage his reputation but i do it happens when you love someone but if somebody were to talk about it i truthfully i wanted it to be zach because i was like he he was really close to the situation and he's somebody who loved clinton so like that mattered to me because it was like that affected how i felt about the situation yeah it's easy as an outsider to be like he's fucking insane that's crazy like he's horrible yeah but like somebody who knows him it's like different sorry now i'm sad oh i love you don't be sad
You could be Marianne. I can't afford Marianne. I love Natalie taking up the star bro branding while you're crying. But no, no, I'm glad like I wanted it to be him. I just think it just like I just didn't want to be attached to it at all. And so it sucks that like he chose your episode, my best friend in front of him. It felt like, yeah, just slimy.
I agree I actually I fully agree And I would say that to Zach's face And I would say that now And even after I left I called you And I told you what happened Well what you guys don't know So I don't want to seem like You have any responsibility In it at all Because like Tana called me Right after it happened She was like Just so you know Like this is what was said And Zach is a good friend of mine Like
And so I like she told me she was like, it's pretty bad. Like just warning you. And like she told me she's like, I weighed in on it and I gave my honest opinion, whatever. And so I separately reached out to Zach and I was like, hey, like I don't appreciate that being your choice. Like
Bringing it up with you I agree Because if he It's totally Within his right To tell that story That was his best friend Like Clinton was one Of his best friends And Clinton went on his show And kind of And he lied to all of us Like he Yeah It was so Zach was completely Within his right To talk about that It affected him directly And like his show Was the way I found out That's the way Everybody found out Yeah
But choosing your episode was didn't leave a good taste in your mouth. It made it about me. And at that time, I didn't even know how about me it was. You know what I mean? Yeah. And then he told me he cut it and then it came out anyway. He didn't tell me. So Zach's on couch all motherfucking days. No, I mean, like, listen, whatever. Like, again, I thought I should feel no responsibility to protect anybody's like reputation. It's stupid. It's stupid. But.
But I've been there and I understand that. Zach himself didn't ever respond to me. He relayed the message to somebody that he cut it and I was sleeping fine at night thinking like, okay, like I can live another day without having to worry about this story. Yeah. And from the beginning, you and I have kind of had a conversation about how I always will say to you, I don't think that you should feel a guilt or a weight on your shoulders to protect something that is so awful and could potentially...
Inevitably come out I know But I understand I know that I shouldn't But the way Like what I know Is so different Than like what I feel If it were any of you guys Like if it were you Like
It doesn't matter what you did to me. Like if you did the worst possible thing to me in the world, it's not like I would still never want something to come out that could ruin your whole career. Yeah. Like I still loved him. I had a good relationship with him. Like he was he was a good boyfriend, which made it was so much. That's what was so horrible about it. And it is scary that someone can be such a dichotomy of two things.
Of two things Where they can be such An amazing person In one light And then You find out These awful things Yeah And I also understand Completely what it's like To love someone so much That you're wearing These rose colored lenses Of I know how awful It is what they're doing But I love them so much That I still want to Protect them Yeah and just Any person Like any emotionally Abusive relationship Or like toxic relationship Is
I mean you've been in Like once you've been in it You can speak on it And understand it But if you haven't Like it's easy to just be like Yeah well any situation Like that too Like if you can step out of it With an untainted mind You could say Cut and dry And black and white This is what I would do And this is how this should go But then when your emotions Become so involved You know
It creates like a fucked up mess And that's why That's why I've always felt So passionate about it Because I can see it From an outsider perspective And my thoughts are How can you do this To my best friend And how can you do this To anyone Well you guys are all So good about it Listen At any point Someone could have made a video It would have been a viral video I thought it was gonna be Lila I thought it was gonna be Lila I thought it was gonna be Lila Tana offered me like
So much money for it. I offered her so much money to let me... But here's what I'm going to say. Not... I don't think I'd profit a dollar if I made something about that. When I was saying that, I meant that in the regard that like I truly... And I still do. Feel so passionately about airing that out as hard as I possibly can. And that's why...
You know it was so hard for me even on Zach to not go in on how I feel. Because I can look at it without having been in love with this person and be like, fuck you. That's the thing. I think that's the point I was trying to make before. It's like if I were an outsider and this were happening to you, for example, I would be like, run for the hills. What are you talking about? He is insane. Like whatever. Yeah, but love comes in the mix. Yeah, and there were so many like,
Yeah There's so many factors to it That like I mean I'll never explain I never plan on talking about it at all To begin with But it just sucks now Because there's this whole story Like I'm getting tagged In these TikToks all day People are messaging me like Why are you still talking to him And stuff And I'm like It just Like it just The whole situation Like sucks Yeah But
But I think you're going to end up being with someone really amazing. And I think you're going to have a great relationship and move on completely. And I think so, too. And honestly, I've been doing good. I think that's why it bothers me so much is like I've been doing I've been really doing good, honestly. And honestly, ever. Obviously, I think every person after that is an upgrade. But I think you've been really taking it there with your your
the potential suitors yeah and listen no shade to zach saying i love zach saying i think he's amazing but no i'm serious like well i feel like i just really went in on him like i didn't mean for it to be like that i just i hate how you feel i hate that i have to talk about something i didn't want to talk about i hate that the way i wanted the wine oh no i thought look at i thought she was doing this you can't have the wine i don't even need the wine
I think now that it's out there, it's good that you said how you feel about the situation. And this is my special request for the people. It's not going to help me or make me better if you make if you bully him or me. Yeah. OK, I think no one is bullying you because how could you? And I hope that in the future, moving forward, you can know that anything that does come to this person is not a situation you created yourself.
In you were dragged into You know But it doesn't make it any easier And this is It's your hot crier I look like fucking Jabba the Hutt when I cry I don't mean to be like a baby Bitch I just hope you know Like on a complete side note If this ever happened to me
Like I always said Oh I'd fuck his dad Oh I'd fuck his brother Oh I'd whatever It was crazy It was pretty crazy But I'm glad now Because I feel like I looked really crazy For a long time Everyone was like Girl like Are you good online And I was not good And that's I think that that as well Well hold on You look hot
I know this is going to end up in a photo dump. You're going to be like, yes way. That as well from a best friend perspective. I never thought you looked crazy online because if someone cheated on me, like, you know how I acted even when Brad cheated on me. Cheating was the least of my worries. I literally didn't even care about that. But there's a part, there's a part of you that with your best friend, you're like, you know what I mean? I want it to be like, yo, like this is why she feels, you know what I mean? Um, that's always going to be a thing. It's fine now. We're chilling. Things are good now. I mean, but it, it's,
It's a heavy situation, you know? It was really heavy. And honest to God, some good stuff came out of it. I'm not sure what yet, but probably something. I'm like, Marion is getting sponsored. Marion. Honestly, her foundation matches. Like, when I cry like that, it's like... I don't tan my face, so my skin underneath here is like three shades lighter.
A second ago, I just told you I thought Lila was going to be the one to break it. Would you like to hear something funny that Lila did that I caught her in today to lighten up your mood maybe a little bit? I would love that. Who could help me tell this? Sorry, guys. That was like real drama. Brooke, don't apologize. I think that it's like...
I just appreciate... I appreciate what's real as is no matter what. I would rather someone be completely real and completely honest about whatever it is, whether it's funny real or it's real real. And I think that we had to address that today. You said downstairs, you were like, talking about this in front of a live studio audience might be a fucking thing. Because I knew I was going to sob because I always do. But honestly, at the same time, we all...
were there for you and around you and in the group chat when this situation was happening and we all feel the same way. So, you know, we're all here for you. I am. Like, that's the problem. Lila. What'd she do? She texted, don't cry. I love you. I think you should leave the tears count. But... I'm stunning. Lila texted the group chat. And I don't know if you saw this text a couple weeks ago. And she goes, I'm so...
Trevi, come here. Yeah, come. Come here. Come here and tell this story. I think Trevi will just do it so much more justice than me. We're at dinner at Harriet and it's what is it? Trans Day of Visibility. You know, Marsha Molinari, H. Wood Group, the whole nine. The dolls are dolling. And Lila talks in the group chat. She goes, OMG, OMG, OMG.
I like submitted everything to Warren Lentz a few months ago. I finally got verified. And I think like a few people sent in the chat. They're like, whoa, congrats. Cause like there, you know how she was verified before and like got deleted. Oh, I, I thought she was verified.
what so she isn't she was never very new account well her like what seventh new account i think a few people were like wow congrats like that's really cool like she just like really see and the thing about lila is that i feel like she once she says the lie it's the truth no she believes it every time it's the truth and so do we we eat it up every damn time i've done it i lie so hard that i believe myself
Me too. Wait, not a good thing. Yeah. And Lila, if you're watching this, I'm so sorry. But like, it's just too good. My new favorite thing is like whenever I do something bad, I'm like, I look at her and I go, like, you wouldn't do this to me. It's so gaslight. So like I didn't see her take her purse and pull out a debit card and go click on meta verified purchase. You're kidding. Yeah.
I watched her type in the numbers. No, no, no. I had to put a flashlight on my phone to help her take a picture of her ID front and back. To get meta-verified. To get meta-verified.
And then five minutes later. So we can all congratulate her on being verified. And she, you know, it's just like, like I said, it is the truth. Like once, five, it only took like five minutes. It was like a hop, skip and a jump. And there was a blue check. I'm like, I suck dick for that shit. That's so hilarious. She just looked at it. She just like, she got like a little emotional.
She's like... I was like, babe, that's fully, like, that MasterCard did that. Like, that was $7.99. Yeah. That's fucking... Like, you paid for that by eating Tara's world's pussy. I know.
Do you know what I mean? Like, that's not. Wait, so you can just pay $12 right now and get verified. Oh. Dude, I saw it. Lord knows. I'm like, Marianne knows I cannot afford that. Seriously. Anyway, so then it just happened. And then she was just like, she texted. She's like, she's like, how do I make them think? She's like, how do I think? How do I make them think that, like, I got verified, like, naturally? Wait, but why would we be impressed by that? I just learned.
Well, I mean... And it's so funny, too, because, like, Warren Lentz, for those who don't know, Warren Lentz is going to send me a cease and desist. But Warren Lentz is a guy that works in this industry, and he's managed creators, and he's an amazing guy. He just texted me the other day, I'm going to church, is there anything you need me to pray for? Like, that's the type of guy Warren Lentz is. Like, he's out here...
First of all, receiving that text a little backhanded. Like, you're on your way to church and you're like, hey, Tana Mongeau, is there anything you need me to pray for? I'm like, yeah, day 76, bitch. But, um...
And all of my best friends were going to be around for that. But he's just an amazing guy who works really hard and is very honest and established in this industry to throw him in on that. To be like, yo, Warren, let's... And so specific. Like, this is exactly where I got. I did it a few months ago. He told me it would happen right around this time. I would get so embarrassed if I got verified right now. And I think she...
Honestly, yeah, because it has the little... But, like, her... I think she, like, ran and, like, you know, Lila, please kill me if I'm wrong, but, like, her being like, this is, like, insane. Like, it's on Trans Day of Visibility. You know what I mean? I'm just sitting there, like, you know, with my Red Bull. Wait, but have you heard of... In a dream, if you will. In a dream. And watching them just down Marsha Molinari's tab. Sunny vodka, like, the whole night.
Oh, no. That's kind of, that's like an amplified version of, have you ever told a story? I know this is happening to you. Have you ever like told a really exaggerated version of a story accidentally in front of somebody who was there? I don't know. She does that to the internet. Wait, wait, but what was the question? I'll take it as far as like gaslighting the person who was there. So like, oh, you don't remember that? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. I've had, well, I've had that happen where she'll tell a story and I'm like, I'm like, Jay-Z was not there. Like, Drake was not there. Or like, absolutely. And the words like, he said that verbatim. Well, I did not say that at all. Wait, am I in? Verbatim is great. Wait, is there a group chat I'm not in? No, this was in Roach. Google Trans Day Visibility. Am I not? Find the date. Scroll up. No, that's...
It is absolutely in the group chat. You know, honestly, I can never really talk about someone being dramatic or fabricating a story normally because I, you know,
I'm drunk. I run. Yeah, I, you know, I'm president of that company usually. You just, you embellish a little bit for the fun of it all. And there's nothing wrong with that. And I'm just a very dramatic person. I sincerely will believe something like happened that way. And it's like, which is just insane. I'm so drama. Lila, like if, if I'm the COO, if I'm the COO, Lila's the CEO. Can I please answer that? Wait, can we debunk this?
Can you hand your phone to Trevi? Mine. It's a picture of me and Paul McCartney. I want to ask her how she got verified on the mic. Oh my god, wait. Honestly, can I? No, like, congrats. We were just talking about it. Congrats. Put your phone like this. She declined. I know she, like, that's to call somebody and then not answer when we call right back. Why are you ignoring me? Loud. Just yell it. Wait, Lila! Verified!
Lila I hope you fucking choke and I hope you lose your blue checkmark. Can you believe you're the most sober one in the group? Maybe Trevi? Wait, what? What's the actual fuck? You know there's like a thing in sobriety where they're like, well this is like very AA, but they're like, yeah you might not drink but you still act drunk. Really? What do you mean? Like someone who's like, no like with your relationships.
Like you still act like an alcoholic even though you don't drink. Like manipulative, lying, cheating. Those aren't alcoholics. Those are all pre-existing symptoms. Yeah. In my friend over here. Thank you, Trevi, for coming in.
Okay let's we're gonna do some pop culture topics Get the tear gone like hit a one I can't it's just a part of me now I actually have amazing pop culture topics for us today Okay This news that I'm about to discuss for us to talk about today came out maybe an hour ago
And that's why we're going to take a break after this episode For anybody watching right now too who is a little frustrated with the delay on these episodes We're going to get a little better with shooting more current Because it actually frustrated me to the core downstairs Knowing that we are like talking about this within the hour And someone will break it before us Yeah BFFs like their turnaround time is like before you even film the episode Like I'm trying to get like Dumois over here discussing this one okay Yeah
Kylie Jenner and Timothee Chalamet. Wait, what? I believe it. But like, I feel like Kylie's like a, like a, and we air this TikTok. Just such a woman. Basically someone sent in to Dumois that Timothee and Kylie are dating. And then all these people were saying, making confirm it. What I will say is I love that for her. I feel like it's like a good reset for everybody in her position to get like a really malnourished looking like.
Little Twinkie looking I never thought Kylie would be into the like Dying men I could see it from her If you think about it That's Look at her All her sisters Just Like Kim went to Pete Actually that's it Kourtney to Travis Kourtney went to Travis Yeah
Stassi and Jaden, you know what? That makes perfect sense. It's crazy the way that like the type of men that people in Hollywood go for like almost become a trend. Like we do that. Oh, for sure. But like we like we did that to them. We were like, I love little malnourished looking like sucked up little. I just I've always been a Kylie Jenner stan and I. Yeah, I should hate you. For sure.
For sure But something about Seeing her Stormy stalker Something about Seeing her go From Travis to Timothy Like feeds something In my brain You know Yeah well You agree that Timothy Goes Timothy Then Travis right I was more so Just saying the dichotomy Oh I thought we were Rating them I think Timothy Is like one of the
I'm way better than I think they both are sexy sexy sexy sexy I would and just in very different ways you know I feel like Kylie's kind of the majority of her life with the people she's dated had a type and this is like one of her first like oh hey look I don't have a type well then she's gonna you know she's gonna like
I don't know I think she's gonna go through like a major rebrand pretty soon here do you think that this Kylie and Timothy moment kind of like Kendall and Bad Bunny how people are saying it's like a distraction what is she distracting us from I don't know like it hasn't even happened yet yeah something big's coming I don't know I don't think so because I don't know do you think she sent that into to me Kylie was like honestly I'm gonna that would be so funny to like start sending shit like
I've never thought about the fact that I could so easily do that. Yeah, you could. I probably couldn't, but you should be like, oh my God, I heard Tana Mongeau is dating. Kim and North got banned from TikTok. No. Which is like... That was like my favorite content. Ever. Ever. So funny. Ever. Honestly, I feel like that made everybody see Kim in a new light. I feel like everyone was like...
It's funny because like right now, obviously TikTok is in that whole legal battle of getting banned or whatever it is. Imagine Kim just bought the app. Think about my mental health. If they ban TikTok, I have no reason left to live. Seriously. Not one. At all. Speaking of no reason left to live, Trump was indicted. Okay.
If I know what that means the Barbie movies coming Out man cut the fucking bit I need to Black out this is just a joke by The way I just want to say like very quickly The like heavily being Insane after 75 hard is very much So a joke and I feel like I learned more about Myself in 75 Days than I ever have and I will take the things that I learned And apply them to my Life I will say sorry To cut you off you're
I don't know if you'll want to speak on it because it's like you, but I feel like every single thing I see of you right now, every tick tock, every podcast you go on, all the comments are like very positive and everyone is really team Tana right now. And they're seeing that how smart you are and fun and grown. That's really nice. And I really appreciate that. And I appreciate all the people saying that she's like, that's
But I'm shooting up in the back alley later. No, I think it has to do a little bit with your 75 hard. Obviously you've been smart all along, but it's like, but I do know, I think it has a lot to do with my 75 hard. I think that that side that people are seeing has always been and is a side of who I am all the time. But that side can kind of be overshadowed by a wild, crazy side. And I mean, maybe it,
A little more so than deserved I guess Because people like to see crazy way more than they like to see wholesome and grown So maybe I don't know I don't think so Not right now But I think people like a good story arc So people have been loving this sober That's all there is right now I haven't been wild in 75 days And I think I went on this journey because
I started off this January pretty rough, pretty crazy. Hey, Ashley. Hey, Ty. Hey, Paige. I will say, like... Had a great time in Miami, but... This sounds horrible, but I'm almost always not... I'm like, I always agree with the internet. But, like, usually when, like, you're...
really crazy or in some sort of thing it's like it's almost the same in like our your personal relationships kind of thing like when the internet thinks you've fallen off like so do all of us yeah I'll speak for me only but like right now what I'm seeing is like the same way all of us feel where we're all like oh my god love her right now and I think that that's why I was so afraid for day 76 because I don't want to feel like I just like
Am erasing that you know You aren't but you're not undoing all That it's like you know like I mean it is you were eating healthy The whole time but it's like it's like that it's not like One bad day of eating is gonna Just completely undo your 75 days Like you're still gonna you're still way Better off than you were before you look amazing You're acting amazing I feel like you're You're good to go and I feel like
If you just drink less often. I'm just be wild less often just in general. I've enjoyed my little grandma era just in everything and my mature decision making era. You know, actually think about the things I do and say before I say and do them. I think that one of my biggest flaws as a human and maybe I'm maybe everyone in this room has a different opinion on what it is.
I'm like, I'll name some. Yeah. Is that I am so yin or yang. I'm such a like boomerang with everything I do. I'm either like working so hard or I'm taking five days off. Like, or I'm...
In a super toxic relationship Or I'm like literally In the healthiest Relationship ever Yeah I'm wearing Emo boots And chaps And nipple pasties Or I'm in A suit and tie Okay Like I You know what I mean Like I'm Yeah someone Complicated the bottle Yeah
Like I'm blacking the fuck out and wilding. I know what you mean. It's like it's very like one or the other. You were kind of telling me this the other day because I said like just drink a little less and you're like no it's like all or nothing. I am such an all or nothing individual with everything I do. You know what I mean? Like I'm spending a week of my life being so unfiltered and rogue and saying the craziest shit or I'm like oh I just...
you know, I'm just, I'm beyond that. Like, it's like everything I do is so, so, you know, I'm spending $50,000 on Coachella or I'm asking someone to Apple pay me for a water bottle that they bought. Wait, there's a name for this. I'm like, is anyone here? I'm an extremist. I know. I think it's like bipolar. Maybe. Yeah. But even just manic, but manic is,
It's impressive no I'm listen Listen I'm in no shape to Diagnose anyone I think things Like that usually come in Waves it's just like I'm Very much like decisive and Extremist on everything that I do and I struggle with that and Everything like I'm either Eating a full pizza to Myself or I want kale like It and there's no fucking In between and that's Something I would love to Work on and I have no Idea how so if anybody Has no moderation really I Feel like yeah I'm kind of Well no I think I'm Actually the opposite I Think I'm always so Indecisive I never
Never know what the fuck I want to do or say or And not even if it's indecisiveness It's just like still I just I'm Really bad at balance I'm really bad at a middle Ground I'm really bad at A 50-50 you know you just you commit to whatever Bit you know and but that can Be scary and I would love to be able to Change that so I hope
I can I would love to make an active effort on that But it's it's one of the few things about myself That I feel like I can't like nitpick and diagnose and figure out Like I genuinely don't know how to change that about myself Like I'm either like I think someone's my soulmate Or I want them dead Like just everything I do is so Extreme Yeah and I don't know how to fix that And I would love to but I don't know either Well we're gonna keep you in check We're not gonna let you get to the I hate people I love them Phase ever again
And it's gonna be good Stay tuned for me at Coachella But this is a rollercoaster of an episode Yeah sorry this was a really extreme episode Sorry about that But all amazing topics And I love to talk my shit with you girl Me too And Cancelled comes out tonight at midnight Oh my god It's out in other countries right now This is the first time we've shot an episode of Cancelled Season 2 Where an episode is out already And there's no one else I'd want to
I'm very happy that we're canceled. Love you guys. Love you guys. I'm blacking out. Stay true. Lila's verified.