100: TANA’S STALKER IS BACK…
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Hello and welcome back to the cancelled podcast. What were you going to say? I glitched so hard. I know. What other podcast were you going to say? I don't know. This is the only one I have. Oh, maybe you were welcome back to just Trish. Oh, that's exactly what happened. That's exactly what was happening for the visual listeners. Tana is dressed up as Trish. I didn't have time, so I didn't dress up. You see Trish.

I am Trisha Paytas as King Tut. It's so funny. I thought that just for some reason, I assume that she just had like a normal makeup on. And then I go to the video and it's like pink and bedazzled. And you were like 10 minutes away. And I was like gluing rhinestones to my face. Wait, honestly, amazing though. Also, I noticed that the dog downstairs is bedazzled. Was that you? No, that was Ashley. We were just deciding that Winnie also wanted to be King Tut. Of course. Yes, of course. Of course. And then we also have... As if...

This wasn't enough. First of all, you look amazing as Moses. Thank you so much. It's not the most comfortable situation. I don't know if I could survive in the wild with a beard, but it'll do for the day. It's weirdly like it like you look good. Like if I just are you attracted to me? Like I'm weirdly really attracted to you. I'm not even kidding. Like if I just met you and you looked like this, I would be like, that's hot. And I don't know why. That is so nice. I'm like careful. Like I wish more men looked like girls.

Ain't that the truth? Speaking of, we also have Amari as Malibu Barbie. Can you please come show us your look? I'm stretching out my smile so that I can laugh this episode. I love it. What's up? Where my mic at? Wait, wait.

I love when you use. I'll be back. I'll be back. Amari will be back in a little bit for his debut as Malibu Barbie. You honestly look like you look like me after like two shots in a Xanax bar. Like you look like I hate people. I love them. Like you really do. And then we have Amish Aaron as Elvis. Wait, Aaron's sweating. It's genuinely fabulous. Like if I didn't know better, I would think you were him.

So we are the entire Paytas Hackman family today for this episode of Cancelled, which is so iconic to me. Paige was going to be Elvis and then she dropped out last minute. So I honestly feel like Erin as Elvis is so fitting. It's so fabulous. It is so fabulous. I am so excited for today's episode of the podcast, though. I feel like I have so many good topics and I'm going to be clipped.

Okay. At least you look gorgeous. I have a mustache and beard. It's so weird because I think you look gorgeous. Like I look a little crazy. Like only Trisha can really pull this off. No, it's like you genuinely look like beautiful. That's so nice. This is definitely not how I feel my most. Speaking of not feeling my most.

I have to immediately tell you something. Oh no. Obviously last night I was like, oh, I need to self tan. Like if I'm going to be Trisha Paytas as King Tut, I have to self tan. I have to give the full fantasy, right? Of course. I noticed that I'm out of my regular Isle of Paradise. Okay. So now I'm like, okay, we're trying a new self tan. I'm automatically in murky territory. I ended up using the Isle of Paradise oil version of what I normally use. So, and it ended up like

looking fine it's kind of translating on camera a little wonky oscar's been putting a filter on us too that looks like outer banks i'm gonna have to talk about that in a second but you keep going so it's fine okay i wake up i'm like all right it's a little footy on the hands it's a little whatever and obviously a while ago i used to self-tan all the time and every time i would finish self-tanning i would notice the next day that the bottom of my feet look as though i i

I don't even know. You've been walking the streets barefoot for like six weeks straight. And I could never figure out why. I was like, it's so weird. It gravitates to my feet. And then one day on tour, I was self-tanning in a hotel room and you were like, bro, like you're spraying it all over and then you're stepping on the floor. Right? So then I've been trying to be more mindful of like doing it on top of a towel, like whatever it is, you know? And...

For some reason last night, I was just high as fuck. I wasn't feeling self-tanning anyways. You know it's a whole journey. And I was like, whatever. Sometimes I skip that part. And I'm just down to accept what's happened to my feet, right? This one. What's crazy about this is you're about to show me something I noticed 20 minutes ago. No, but you need to see it in full. Brooke Amber. Brooke Amber. Brooke. Brooke. Brooke. Brooke.

- Ben, you're lying. - I'm literally, there's a tear in my eye. - That's like your arm. - Wait, that's a nice like bottom of your foot though. 'Cause that means you've got a crazy arch to your foot. I'm flat footed. That would have been just like one solid block.

Well, no, but the thing is, it's like I thought I think I'm getting flat footed. I'm finally getting to the bottom of my foot journey. I think that's why I think someone said that. I think that's why your feet are growing is because they're like the arch is slowly going away. I think that's why I'm going up so many shoes. But that is easily the like.

Worst thing I've ever seen Yeah no it's so bad And I scrubbed them today too Like this is on there Wait but it's like How did that happen With the oil version You're not even Spraying anything I have no No you're spraying an oil Oh You're spraying an oil I have no idea How I'm gonna take Feet pics this month The lights are going off Oh baby I don't think They want to see that To be honest Actually maybe they do They're getting They're pretty focused

Freaky defeat people Yeah like maybe That's like some But I'm hoping It's so bad though I screamed at the top Of my lungs this morning And imagine Makoa Like I just feel like I've been doing So many things Where I'm like That would have been My final straw 100% Like you know Makoa Was just standing there Like what And then this He told me I was sexy As King Tut You are I don't understand What you're saying You look so cute But this must be How you felt When you were telling me I looked good In my Ronald McDonald costume Nobody was sexy

But you know what's funny? You know what I love about you? Is like so against sexy Christmas, so against sexy Ronald McDonald, so down for beard as Moses Hackman. I love it. But you know what? I've actually done this look once before because I was Billy Ray this year. Oh, shoot. I forgot about that. For Bebe's birthday party. What were you just going to tell me about? We were going to talk quickly about what Oscar did to me in the last episode. Okay.

I think it was Oscar because I refuse to believe that I did my own self that dirty. But like I was so or I think he put an Outer Banks filter on us. No, because everything was like greener to like like our house doesn't. It doesn't look like saturated. Yeah. Like it just it doesn't look like that. But everybody thought I did orange makeup to match my pumpkin hat, which like. Like, OK, OK.

But I didn't But anyway This is my natural skin color And I'm really leaning into it Because Me talking about The bottom of my feet Well I don't Self tan just like Looks so bad on me For some reason And I like try All the time I've tried everyone Isle of Paradise I love But I love it when I'm already Like a little bit tan When I'm really pale like this There's nothing that can fix it So I gotta just lean in I think

it's good to lean in like I have such a like self-tan like it's fuck antidepressants fuck therapy if I feel fucking awful about myself one fucking coat of that orange shit and I'm like oh my god I'm

honest to god though i've never looked like okay with the exception of maybe your hands and feet i've never looked at you and thought like oh her tan looks like shit ever that is just like such a nice lie no i don't actually mean it because i have one friend off the top of my head that i can name that i want to literally like shake her and say never ever ever get a spray tan i know exactly who you're talking about she's gotta stop you're so right she needs to be but who the fuck am i to be talking about anybody's body is

Sorry, I'm trying to adjust so that I can smile in this episode because I already like have been giving bad vibes. You can also just let them know off rip that you're so happy. I honestly am so happy. I really do want to look like this all the time. Like I... No, you look amazing.

I just love cosplaying anything Trisha does. Like I might just run it up for the next 10 episodes, like Tavern Girl, Whole 9. Like I just, when I feel like Trisha. She doesn't like wait for Halloween to cosplay. She'll just cosplay every day of the week. It's so true. I think I might be like picking up that trait soon because it does bring me a type of joy that I cannot express. It is so fun. I've never actually like full-blown cosplayed somebody. Your beard is just so good. What about it?

No, I'm serious. This is the most sexually attracted to you I've ever been. Maybe it's because I'm feeling Trisha-y though too, like in Gear Moses. So I'm like, fuck me. You think so? Are you really getting into character? Yeah. I love that. I love water. Water. He loves water, right? Yeah, he loves water. That's good. Nailed it. Amari just sitting here in platform heels like, cock out. It's so good. Me? I guess before I get into all of my topics, we should talk about our LA shows. Yes.

They were so fucking amazing. I cannot believe that happened. Me either. It's so crazy because we were home for the last episode that we filmed. So I was like, that's weird. Like, because now we're home from tour again. But...

So crazy, so amazing. Dolby Theater. I just... When I was hosting the Steamies and got drunk on that stage, I never thought there'd be a world where I'd ever be on that stage again and be able to redeem myself. Like, I thought that would just be my final memory of the Dolby. What a great memory. What a hilarious memory. And Trisha is just... I can't wait for her live show in December. She's so... I'm so creepy. Imagine me and Trisha, like, seeing me, like, talking about her. No, I love it so much. But, like...

Like she is just so fucking made for live performance. Her performing shallow. When we got home that night, he didn't know like the shallow lore. And so I like updated him and I was literally moved to tears. Like the fact that like she performed it live on stage with us and just fully committed was so fucking. I know she really like, like jumped into character and she was so, it's so interesting. Like Tricia, cause I feel like she genuinely has like,

Like she doesn't truly understand how much people love her. And she's always... She's like, what if I go out there and like people don't know who I am? And we kept telling her like, Trisha, like...

We have like a little tidbit in the beginning of our show where Trish is in it and the crowd goes so crazy every single time that it's like we can gauge how good a crowd is going to be or how loud a crowd is going to be based on how loud they cheer at that like moment because that's like we know they're going to scream. And I always say that it's like it's our Hail Mary. Like if I'm on stage in like Springfield, Missouri, and I like forget a part of my story and like the crowd goes silent, like I'm turning to that audience and saying, y'all love Trisha Paytas.

Every single time. Even when I was going through some stomach issues and had to run off stage to use the restroom, I could hear from the restroom you going, so how do y'all feel about Trisha Paytas? Like it is just so it was such a full circle moment to have her like close out the show. Like it is something I'll never fucking forget my entire life. It was just so amazing. And just the way she was received like literally I don't think they stopped cheering for like 10 minutes during it was so and all the people in just Trisha. It's like seeing their faces. It was I know because no one knew she was

Coming and so many people Just had like love Trisha Paytas Yeah and it was like It just like I wish we could Bring her out for every show Because it's like It was so special And I do just want to say Now that tour is done I hate going on this Whole emotional tangent While I look like this Right now but it's like I'm just so fucking Grateful for our fans Like genuinely like This girl wrote me a letter

um I took a photo of it way at the Los Angeles show and let me find it hold please I'm sorry she just wrote this whole thing saying like I met you in Portland six years ago and she said I was 14 and you were 20 we locked eyes and for the first time in my short life you weren't looking through me like through a screen first time feeling the warmth of being seen as a person and not just a problem and

I felt real and important. You looked me in the eyes, held my shoulders tight and reminded me how loved I was. You didn't let me leave until you knew my name and made me smile and like all this stuff. And she just like went on this whole, I know. No, I know. I know. I know. I know. She said, I'm unsure if our paths will ever cross again. And I need to thank you in this life. You changed my life. You were the first person to ever root for me on my team. And I would not be here without you, Tana. And I'm sure many other fuck ups and losers relate and like all this stuff. And I just like,

That makes me like literally want to sob. I know. Sob my beard off. I'm going to lose my mind. But it's just like knowing that people feel that way at all is so crazy to me. Like crying in the Moses is it just. No, I don't know. I just. And like what a way with words she has. I know it was such a beautiful letter. And I was like, you're not a fuck up. You're not a loser. Like I had to message her after and just tell her like how much I love her. But yeah.

I don't know, like knowing that all these people are in this room every night and everyone kind of has that in common, right? Like they maybe say what's on their mind and they don't feel like they fit in because of it or people who genuinely... Knowing I've ever changed one person's life, right? It's like...

mind-blowing and like I don't necessarily know if I'll ever like believe it to that extent but it's just like I just want to thank my fans like so fucking much because it's like I really wish I could go in every single one of those people's minds and they could understand that like I would not be alive if it wasn't for them and just like coming off this tour really looking back at like being in all those rooms every night like filled with so many fucking people who like all have something in common and just I don't know dude like I just was

The past week now that it's over, I'm so sad. I want to go back out immediately. It's so true, the low after tour. Just being with that many fucking people who love you and that you love back as much, I can't believe that was real. And I just want to thank...

My fans, our fans, again and again and again, like, holy fucking shit, I cannot believe that was real. And if you told fucking little Tana, who was suicidal, sitting in front of her dirty door in her horrible house, that, like, it would get better and we'd be playing the Dolby fucking theater. Like, that's... And I just hope that, like, I know that we're never...

putting our role model inspiration fucking hats on. Like I'm not, I don't want to be a role model in so many ways, you know, as I say as King Tut, but like I'm still crying as Moses. So I hope we can serve as an inspiration to people that if you're in a bad spot of your life, like you can fucking turn everything around and like you will find people who love you for you. And like you can be yourself even if it's like, I don't know, like I just remember like

Like the girl in those story time videos was a, the weird kid. I don't know. Just everything I would say. I was always the outspoken fucking outlier, weird kid. And I found this family of people who love me for me. And I just hope other people can like do the same thing. I don't know. I don't mean to go on such an email. Trust me. I have, I've had a whole existential crisis about it. Like since I've been home. Cause it's like, it's such a special experience. And like in the moment, of course you realize how special it is. But like when you finally get home and it's like quiet and you're like, Oh my God, like, I can't believe I did that. And like,

I just I think of like 20 years from now When we're like with our kids And we're like no seriously Like this happened Like mom you're so lame Like there's no way Like you're making this up You know what I'm saying Like it's just so Like it's so cool And I'll never ever ever get over it And I want to tour forever But you know what I mean Like it's I think it's like

You walk out on stage and you hear these screams and you see these big crowds. And when you start doing that every night, it's very easy if you don't make your, if you're not actively trying to make yourself present, it's easy to just fall into that role and understand, yes, that there's thousands of people in front of you. But I think it's little things like reading that one letter and knowing that like she, that one girl in the crowd felt that way. And like that all of those people feel some type of way, like the fact that

There's anyone who's willing to spend money to come like see this in person. Like that it means that much. I just I just cannot fucking believe. And I just want to thank anyone and everyone who came like you have no fucking idea how much that shit like really meant to me. Like I just to both of us. Mm hmm.

But no, like you're saying, it's easy to like dissociate sometimes because sometimes I'm like so overwhelmed by it. And like because it is so like emotional and crazy that I literally have to completely like like remove myself from it. But I like meet and greet, for example, is like the best thing to help with that, because it's like like if I'm feeling that way, the second we start meeting people and stuff, it's like, oh, my God, these are like this is like so crazy. And just like even just like the amount of girls that come into the meet and greet, like fucking hysterically sobbing, like

And I'm always immediately Like I'm so sorry For everything I've said I'm so sorry That you feel raised by me But like it's like I just think about How I feel Like people I would Cry meeting Knowing anyone Like I don't know No but you're being You're being like Trisha right now Where you're like Not acknowledging That like literally The whole world Is obsessed with you You are so nice It's I guess it's just That comes with

Being polarizing. Right? Because it's like if I was someone that just everyone like mass widely loved. But I just guess like knowing that so many people hate me too. I think it's good for me because it keeps me so fucking humble. But it's like I don't want you... You tell me this all the time. But like you shouldn't be focusing on that over the people who love you. And I think that's what Trish does too probably. She just like thinks of those people as like the public. But just I guess seeing people who love you that much in so many rooms. I don't know. I don't want to make this the whole fucking podcast because we do have a million topics. But just...

Even just the people watching at home, like even if I never meet you and you never come to a show where you never comment on anything or anything, just like the fact that you give a fuck at all about me like and her and our lives. And I just can't thank you enough. I fucking love you so much. And if you feel like I saved your life in any way, just know you fucking saved mine.

Okay. I'm touring houses right now. Right. And it's just, it's so hard. This is exactly, everyone's like, why don't you own property in LA? Like I'm like, and I've always just been like, I would rather keep the money in my bank account and rent because it is so fucking difficult. I've toured 20 houses in the past five days. There is something wrong with every single one of them. And you have to care about so many other things when you're buying a house versus renting, like what school district is nearby so that it's like,

Is it profitable or not? If you ever want to sell it or rent it, is someone going to want to buy this house? You know what I mean? If it's by a freeway, you're fucked. If it's the roof, the foundation, the fucking fire insurance and everything. It's just adulting to a new level that is so overwhelming. And so I'm obviously trying to find something that I love, but also something that is...

profitable right yes of course I love your mustache I'm sorry it's like kind of going like a little rogue it's okay it's okay I fell in love with this fucking house I'm so fucking in love with it it's so beautiful but it's on a major street I will never sell it for a dollar more than I can buy it so now I'm just it's sad to have to go tour other houses when I have this one that I love yeah and if it was for rent I could just rent it it wouldn't matter and I can't have it for a reason that's like so upsetting to me but obviously I am also trying to

Find something really safe like gated community like just so safe and

because I need to tell you something about my stalker that I'll tell you after this. So I go tour this fucking house today, right? And it's in Hollywood Hills and it is just like the prime location. Okay. Very Oppenheim group. Like I feel like Christine Quinn would have sold me this fucking house. Okay. And it's just beautiful old like Spanish, right? And it's in the Hollywood Hills. I guess I can say where it is because I'm not fucking buying it. Okay. It is directly above the Comedy Store. Okay.

Like, it's like you only go like right up the hill. Okay. Me with binoculars. I'm like, who's my next victim? It's so in that way. Like, it's like you're right above all the billboards on Sunset Strip. It's so, so bad.

Okay. And it's weird because I'm in the car with Ashley and we're driving there. And I was saying to her, I was like, this is going to sound fucking weird. But before I buy a house, not only am I going to have inspectors obviously come and all of those things, but one of my mandatory things I'm going to do is have a medium come. Like I just like, did somebody die here? Is this weird vibes? Like I've lived in houses that I believe were haunted and I never want to again. Like I think Alomar was so fucking haunted. Like, and I just, yes. Like just,

I could go into detail. Like we lived in that house in Sherman Oaks for like three years, like shadow people walking through the windows. Granted, I was on drugs. And you painted your bedroom walls black. I think that's the thing is that I was in a like a space. I was in an attachable head space. But then the house just and there were weird little dungeon parts of the house that just scared. I don't know, whatever. So I was like, I'm not going to buy something and live in it for five years without having a medium roll up, pull up.

Pull up and wreck. Me turn it off. And so we pull up to this house right after I'm saying that, right? And we walk in and the vibes are just so off. And the house was built in 1920 and it's just scary. I'm like, it's beautiful. It's like Spanish overlooking all of Hollywood. Like it's beautiful, but I'm like,

What like what's died here right who died here and so then the girl trying to show us the house she lets us know she was like this house has so much history. So essentially the people who bought the comedy store when they bought it in like the 80s or whatever whoever was selling the comedy store just threw in this house as well. And so then this house ended up being a crash pad for like all up and coming like like Jim Carrey Robin Williams lived in this house. So people who are doing the comedy store. Yes like

Like the comedy store People owned it So like whenever Someone was doing The comedy store Is this Pauly Shore's mom Yes Yes Okay So she owns that house She owned that house Before she died And like their family Still owns it That's who's selling it Right Oh okay And so Jim Carrey crashed there Robin Williams crashed there If you google the house There's so many drug stories Crazy stories Like all this fucking shit But Legends About this fucking Legends Right And so she's just telling me More about it right We get down to the room That they've now turned into The master bedroom Okay And we're walking through

like on the floor and it's hollow. Like I'm, you know what I mean? You know when you're walking on the floor and you feel like there's something under it, right? And she's like, okay, I have to let you know this. And I just saw a TikTok about this shit, okay? Have you been getting tagged in this TikTok? I saw it, but I'm a skeptic. Again, keep going. So you and I are getting tagged in this TikTok. Like every day for the past week, I've seen my whole mentions of someone talking about tunnels under Hollywood. All fucking week, I'm getting tagged in.

In this thing And I don't know much About tunnels under Hollywood Okay I don't know I don't believe it It's them saying There's like a Starbucks Reserve under Hollywood And like first of all Like I feel like I would just know About that shit Me too Someone would have Slipped up by now Like 100% And so I am gonna go On a deep dive Asking like all my Most famous friends If this is true Because that's what They're saying It's for like I don't know if I have Anybody who would be Invited to Starbucks Reserve In my context Yeah they're saying It's like Will Smith Will be driving Under the tunnels Whatever I don't know

People have been asking us like, hey, can you talk about the tunnels? And I saved it to try to see if I could ask people and whatever, whatever, blah, blah, blah, right? So, but I have no personal lore. And I'm walking through this house and the girl's like, hey, just letting you know, this is hollow. But before the comedy store was owned by the comedy store people, it was owned by the mafia. And like all of Hollywood's A-list would like, it was the place they would go, right? And so there's a tunnel under this house

to the comedy store that Marilyn Monroe used to take like all the time to like go into this house and like yada yada like all this shit like Marilyn Monroe has been in this house. How does anyone build a tunnel that long? I have no idea but I saw the full fucking latch the full fucking thing there is a jet there's a tunnel under this house. They couldn't open it? No they closed off allegedly they closed off like some of the entrances that it would take you to

But I'm like I'm not fucking living in this house No because who's down there Who the fuck is under these tunnels Under this fucking house in Hollywood And the fact that they're just Like you could tell the lady And I were just vibing So she was giving me lore Yeah so maybe like she's not supposed to divulge this information At all And then I leave And I'm googling this house Like just the worst vibe It's beautiful But I'm like

Like the kitchen's been redone. It's gorgeous, but it's like worst vibe. I'm Googling it. Like John Belucci, is that his name? He left a party at that house. I thought you were going to say John Benet Ramsey. I'm like, fuck.

Like fuck no he left a Party at this house to go To the Chateau Marmont And then died like There's so much and I Can't believe it's just For sale and no one Would know if no one Fucking asked I'm wondering it Feels like there's so Much history I wonder That about like I saw The Menendez I know I Hate to bring up the Menendez brothers again I know I don't I love Them so much um their House just sold for 17 Million dollars and I Can't imagine like Buying it and do you Know you only have to Disclose if someone's Died in a house within Three years I kind of get That though and like I Don't know I don't know If I subscribe

If I subscribe to the idea That like a house Is like haunted Because somebody died there You know what I mean Like I also think That like it can be haunted Like no You don't haunt somebody Unless you were like Done wrong by them But friendly ghosts I want a friendly ghost No you What I want a friendly ghost Over no ghost Okay I am so Fucking sorry Absolutely the fuck not I want no ghosts

No ghosts I want a friendly ghost Over no ghosts Because I Like there's things I can't see that they can I don't care if my ghost Is fucking Betty White I don't care if she's so nice And she's chilling with me Like the Barbie movie

OK, like I don't give a fuck. I'm horrified. Really? Yes. I just can't. I can't. We should. Would you ever do like a haunted situation or like a like a speak to ghost? Sam and Colby asked me all the time to do one of their videos with them. I just think, you know, my whole sleep paralysis lore like I had. It was the same as Alomar, like an era of my life where I genuinely was like someone's here. You know what I mean? Is she in the room with us? And like, I don't fuck with it at all.

I'm too paranoid as a person. I just, I don't. I'm not kidding. I never, ever, ever think about being haunted until I'm masturbating. Not kidding. And I've already told you this before, but like that's the only time I ever think like, are people watching over me ever? Because I'm like, how embarrassing. I'm serious. I will never, I would never go uncovered. The faces. No, I'm not kidding. It's literally like me with my Moses mustache on. I'm like. Okay.

I feel like you have to have sex with your boyfriend later with this on. Like, I'm definitely going to have sex like this. Oh, for sure. I made him kiss me when I left the house and he was literally like, this is so... He's like, ew, I hate kissing someone with a beard. I'm like, I have to do it all day long. That is kind of crazy. It's so funny. I'm about to be Avatar with Makoa and we're getting the full special effects. I'm so sorry. Really quickly, I just want to point out that

Did you notice who was Avatar? Who was Avatar? Alabama. It's so funny. The other day I'm going through my house and I found all these fucking photos with photos of me and Alabama Barker. And I was really rats. It's so funny because, you know, I'm not going to sit in that makeup chair for more than three hours. I'm going to be like, listen, make me blue in five minutes. I want that big Sonia Kashuk beauty blender. Like get to work.

Like I'm not gonna look too Here's my thing about it though I saw her photo And it was like Almost so perfect That I'm like I could've done this In an AI app In 30 seconds I know she wasted like Hours and hours And hours of her life I know mine's gonna be Really footy Really really footy But I do think McCone I have to have sex Is it We've already like Kind of planned that For sure But you're gonna need To put like a tarp down

Oh my god it's so bad it's so fucking bad I'm not doing any Halloween cause or I have to do at least one because I have one party that I have to go to but you need to do something like so I think you should do something so good like so I know I truly love Halloween I'd love to dress up but I just haven't thought of anything this year last year I was a deer and I'm like maybe I'll just be a deer again.

You know I live for the full fantasy. What do you want me to be like? Sexy Buddy White? Like, yes. Like, literally, yes. A golden girl? You're kind of a golden girl right now. Oh my God, we could be golden girls. Should we speak on pop culture before we just go down random tangent holes? Tangent holes is not a phrase. Yeah, lots has happened in pop culture this week.

First of all, I don't know if this is considered a pop culture, but they announced the Menendez brothers resentencing today, which I think is going to happen like really soon. Because with the resentencing, they can say,

You deserved 30 years And then they've already Served 30 years And they can be put out Like immediately Yes and so Originally they had served Or they were like Sentenced to life sentences Without parole And now They're eligible for parole And since they've already Been in for like X amount of years They're eligible immediately I'm so excited for them I think that

Everything I said I could have said last week, like all of my takes on it, but I am just really happy for them to start, hopefully begin a more new normal. Same thing as Gypsy Rose and I just... God, that's so amazing. It like literally gives me like chills to think about them sitting in prison like all this time and thinking like they are never going to see outside again. And then now they are because...

people were so i am really passionate and stuff about their kids i think it's so amazing did you know that they both got married in prison did they they both got married since they've been in there to guys no to women outside of prison oh really both of them oh no i didn't know that they yeah and i wish i jumped i wish i got ahead of it to be honest yeah that's so iconic eric is hot they're both like beautiful beautiful people well i just like the pictures gorgeous young eric

Oh, I know. Not me in a beard saying that. I feel like we have to talk about the Brianna Chicken Fry Zach Bryan breakup. Here's what I'm going to say. I was 100% rooting for them to not be the tale as old as time. The lose them how you got them tale as old as time. But him being on Raya the next day makes me feel as though it's hitting the tale as old as time. You know? And it's just like,

You know... What's her name, Debbie? Who's Debbie? Deb. Deb is just somewhere. Deborah is thriving. Someone was saying when the hurricane... Because it wasn't the hurricane, just called Hurricane Deb. Yeah. And Zach Bryan was just... It was something like, you'll never lose the... Of a woman who loves you. I'm fucking brain dead. I don't know. But...

Yes. Yeah. So Deb came before Brianna. And didn't he cheat on her with Brianna? I mean, it's people say that, but I don't I don't think so. Or I think it was just very, very immediate after both Brie and Zach's breakups that they got into new relationships. So much so that it is like very suspicious. Like if my boyfriend were to break up with me, even like my little two month relationship that I have going on right now, if you were to break up with me and start dating someone next week, I would.

Be floored Well people just always Talk about how that is like Narcissism Checkpoint number one It's people who just Can't be alone And it's so It's so scary But like I guess like

I don't know. It's so common. Like his archetype is like so common and it's like you just fill the void and it's like literally like somebody's disposable and Brianna said that in her bathroom floor video. She was like, you can give someone everything and be discarded within days. And it's sad. But this is the thing. She saw him do it to somebody else. So it is like I understand why people are receiving it and they're like, well, you

You were fucking stupid you like you Know what I mean everybody's saying that But I do feel bad in some capacity it's So sad because you always want to Believe yeah I like believe in love like You know what I mean you want to be the Anomaly you want to be the yeah and it's Like I hate you know how many people are Making videos right now that are like She should have known better and stuff I'm like okay Zach Bryan comes knocking on your door And see what you do like be honest yeah It's he you know I know exactly the type Of guy he is like he probably love Bombed her so hard and like of

course like when somebody's telling you all these things you think they're going to be different when you're watching him sing the most beautiful songs in the world and eventually the most beautiful songs in the world about you to these arenas of people who love him and he's vulnerable and he's talented and he's I 100% see how you and then I think that a common thing with women as well though is that you think with a man that

that time put in matters do you know what I mean like I I found myself in this situation a million times where you like she probably at this point right before this breakup was like okay I've put in so much time but it doesn't men don't think like that that's why the taxi cab theory is a fucking thing like that a man you can a woman can do everything for a man for five years and if he's not ready for marriage he will dump your ass and then a year later the first woman who comes by just like

A taxi cab light on Yeah He's gonna marry And it's the same Principle You know what I mean Like the time put in Did not matter In the ways In the end How he was I don't know Dave Portnoy was funny as fuck For tweeting smallest man Who ever lived I know I saw him say today That he like never liked Zach And he always got bad vibes From Zach I've only ever met Zach Like once Have I ever met him

Yes I have I don't think so I just He was at Bree's live show When I went to go do it And so like I got to talk to him A little bit that night I thought we met him I met him Oh you did You did You did Yeah we met him at his show too But I didn't get like Bad vibes from him But you I mean You know there's the story Of him serving his wife With divorce papers While she was deployed No

Yeah so he was married Once before to Rose Only a couple years ago The fact that I know Her name is like so creepy I'm all married with a donkey But yeah so he was married And they were both in The military Or the army I don't know And she was like Active duty like deployed And he just served her With divorce papers No explanation If I'm in the military And someone serves me With divorce papers I am absolutely like Calling all troops And being like Hey can we just move This missile Well just talk about Like are you kidding me Like talk about Oh my god just the

The way that I mean You know the way I handle a breakup Like if it were like That kind of thing Like you're married to somebody And I'm already at war No and the only way You can communicate is letters I'd be putting blood on the letter Like I don't even What do you even do I'd be sending photographic evidence I'd use one of those stamps That you touch and then croak Anthrax Anthrax boots Yes

Anthrax boots the house down. Are you fucking actually kidding me? That's fucked. Okay. I see. There's a lot of lore. That was before Deb and then came Brianna. And there's absolutely zero time in between any of those relationships. That's why people get on him so much online. Yeah. And I felt bad for Bri all along the relationship because everyone was hating on the relationship the whole time being like, girl, like,

He's gonna do to you Exactly what he did To everybody else And you know She was probably like So bothered by that And then he did Yeah that's sad It's just That's a mess It's such a mess It's always the guys Who sing like The most beautiful love songs That are just cheating He has that fucking song Let you down or whatever Where it's He literally says I'm gonna fucking let you down I'm gonna do everything Like that's who I am It's almost like They have too much love In their heart And they have to spread it All over the place Even if

If he didn't cheat on her It's just the Raya The next day Is diabolical It's Olivia Rodrigo It's like traitor It's like you fucking You don't That's It's the same thing to me Especially if it was On any sort of terms Like cause he put out A statement Where he was like

Like he hasn't been Mentally right Since his mom's passing And like he just needs To work on himself Okay Clinton I know Well I'm like Yeah I think I've seen this film before Except not At least Not at least Yeah but you can't Blame that Like and say like Oh you need to focus On yourself and your mental And stuff and then go on Raya Cause it's like Oh are you gonna do that On a date with some other bitch

It's also just like In what world Do you think You're gonna open up That Raya app And it's not gonna get clocked Like do you think You're gonna stealthily Fuck Yeah that's what But I think that they Must have been broken up For a while I think they break up And get back together Quite often actually Yeah He should just sing He should for sure just

How lucky are we? It's been a hell of a week. He's all, it's been a hell of a week. Brie should have titled her YouTube video that. It's been a hell of a week. Oh, that's good shit. The girls on Raya, how lucky are we?

Right. Like that's insane. It's just not funny. I mean, Jesus, I think Dave Fortnoy will really handle it. So I'm just I'm tapped out on everything I have to say. I wish nothing. I genuinely do. I hope Brianna finds a really healthy, happy world. You know, it's been like really pissing me off on the Internet lately as well. Just there has been so much happening. Like I feel like this is always how the Internet goes. There's like a week where nothing happens and then everything happens. And

It's so fucking sad that Liam Payne passed away. It is just like so, so fucking heartbreaking. Like I know that he did some really fucked up things and just the whole situation is so layered. But I think that what's made me really sad is just seeing all of the girls who were like directioners and like how...

how integral it was for like their childhood, how one direction, how it shaped so many people. And I saw Tara's world. She posted this video where she was just like really distraught over and crying. And all of the comments were like, girl, imagine if this was someone you really knew. Okay. Like, like just like coming at her for being so parasocial. And it's, I was having this conversation with a bunch of people I knew and I realized how split it is.

because like I completely understand like if Justin Bieber passed away I would genuinely be because I was such a believer I still am like it did shape and form me in so many ways you know like I wasn't personally a directioner but I can relate like I would be as distraught as all these girls are but a lot of people in real life like hearing them talk about it just people I know are like they can't understand why like Tara's world was crying like that like they're saying like I don't know that person like I would only be upset if it was like and it's crazy to me like

No you can watch a movie And cry at someone Dying in a movie So why can't you cry At a real person dying Yeah Whether you know them or not That affected your life so much I Like you said I feel like I am just old enough To have not really like

Been like a super like One Direction fan but like BB for example has been crying Literally for weeks I ran into Olivia O'Brien in the elevator the other day was sopping With a One Direction shirt on and it's like It really is so it's Just fucking just horrible yeah I think It's it's so fucking sad and it's crazy That people can be so not sensitive To that like who gives a fuck if that Person knew that person or not if you want to talk Insensitive I want to talk about what they're doing to all The girls who are associated with Liam Payne online Like his current girlfriend

His ex-girlfriend, his kid's mother, like every single one of them is getting like in some way blamed for him having passed away. And I can't even imagine like the grief alone like would probably kill me. And then going online and seeing people blaming me for it. It's so sad. It's so sad. And I like they're, you know, all like I think her name is Kat, his girlfriend that he's he was dating when he passed away.

All of her comments are literally like, why would you leave him there? Like, this is your fault. Like, it is like, how can people possibly be so horrible? Yeah, it's fucked. And it's just crazy because it's like, obviously, if this was something he was struggling with, like that was probably not.

An anomaly of a situation for her Leaving him there And they have kids right No he has a He has a seven year old With Sheryl Crow Who is Who is a one Who is a X Factor Oh I know who Sheryl Crow is That's crazy I did not know that was the mother Um

You know what I want to talk about really quickly? Just kind of in relation to all of this that I keep seeing. So allegedly 2C-B was found in his toxicology report in his bloodstream. Yeah. And apparently also 2C-B has been making a lot of

Recurrences in the media Because Diddy It was like found In all of his shit As well And everyone keeps Calling it pink cocaine Right And I just keep Like seeing that everywhere Like on the news Okay so that's what I saw I saw pink cocaine Found in his system I've always made Like 2CB jokes Like

And I've learned a valuable lesson. I even have, we had a girl come up to us at the meet and greet and talk about how she was like recovering from being addicted to Percocets. And I've seen a lot of people in my life be addicted to like Percocets and hard drugs like that and shit like that. And it is, they're all just such damaging drugs. And I have, we talked about this a while ago, but I've just learned a valuable lesson that I need to be very careful with my jokes. Especially right now, I'm seeing all this like pink cocaine shit. Cocaine is obviously a very bad drug, but I think that

It became a much scarier drug when fentanyl started being coming into the mix and calling 2CV pink cocaine, I think is like diabolical. It is such a horrifying drug and it like will have you like talking to walls and shit. Really? Amari, do you want to? Amari has a Malibu Barbie. Do you have something to say? 2C is something. Don't do it.

Amari's 2CB experience. Do you know, I set a reminder in my phone to yell at Amari for doing 2CB years and years ago because I found out this story third party, but Amari was in the airport, left all of his luggage in the airport, like to send it home and then left the airport. He thought he was at a snack shack. He FaceTimed Ty and he was like, I'm at the snack shack.

Fully an airport vending machine. Obviously the news isn't like marketing it as anything, but I can just imagine so many like young impressionable people seeing like pink cocaine and it just sounds so much lighter of a drug than it is. Well not even just that, but like people who are doing it, like literally doing it because they think it is literally pink cocaine. And it's like so, it's so, so, so such a hard drug. Obviously I think we all sing, right?

Right I think everyone in this room has maybe tried it In that realm right like you're like Oh pink cocaine and I just want to be the Fucking PSA right here that just Because it's like just Trish and Fied and like don't bring Trish at all addresses King Tut Being a freak immediate apology for that I'm just Saying I think that it being pink is really Just fucked up

Like it just like it looks so much cuter than it is. Why is it pink? And now it's just all in the news as like fucking pink cocaine. And I'm like, dude, this shit is a fucked up drug. I thought it was like something mixed. Oh, it's mixed with Molly. It's like if you did Molly cocaine and like. Dude, I did. I mean, only one time and I called the ambulance on myself. I would never touch anything even moderately similar to Molly ever again in my fucking life. It's just like one drug being the equivalent to doing Molly ketamine hallucinogens and like.

coke they really hit all the bases yeah they i know and it's just like so scary i don't know i just not that i should be i just feel like we do have a lot of like young fans who are like girls and gays and like listen i get got by pink shit all the time like if it's pink i'm buying it you know what i mean if it's pink i want it more and it's just i don't think this should be one of those well listen we've done the market research for you there's not a drug in the world that you should try because nothing is that good literally at all except like weed weed's not a drug like even this vape being pink like sells me a little more

I'm just saying. Listen, I need to clear the air really quickly because sometimes me and Tana take jokes a little bit too far, okay?

And what started out As a joke Okay Here's the thing This starts in When I was a senior In high school Ball shaver Schofield Yes That's crazy That you knew What I was gonna say Yeah That was cute Yeah I've told this story Before I'll keep it short I told this kid I was gonna shave his mustache In the shower one time Like it was like Like the guy was dating In high school And for some reason In his head He was like Oh I'm gonna actually Tell all my friends That she shaved my balls In the shower And then I became Ball shaver Schofield And I could never live it down So

So now I like... I mean, I made a joke like that to my boyfriend recently. We were like joking about it. I was like, imagine if I put your little pubes in my locket. Like, kidding. Not kidding. I was kidding. And...

Then I was like, oh, I'm going to take this joke a little one step further. And I'm going to tell Tana that there's pubes in my locket just because we were talking about my locket. And I was like, oh, yeah, there's actually pubes in here. Well, because also I don't even think the people don't even know about this. But it's so fucking funny. Every time we're like at a show in a random green room wherever, like I feel like Paige doesn't see the light at the end of the tunnel. So she'll go manic like on tour and she'll just start cutting her hair. Like I can't even tell you the amount of.

Paige has given herself like a butterfly cut in or like a wolf cut or like whatever's trending on TikTok, whatever cut like Paige. And she's amazing. She's taking the salons. She really does slay it. And so she was cutting her hair per usual. And then you guys were joking that like she should put her hair in your locket. No, I did have a lock of her hair in my locket for like...

A few weeks And then she made me Take it out Cause she thought I was cursing her I was sitting with Paige And she'd had this Like quote unquote Bad week Horrible luck The luck in question Is like stubbing her toe And shit Like it really And she thinks I put a hex on her Well she No but she Where she's so high And she just sits up And she goes Tana I have to remove my hair From Brooke's locket

Like she's not saying that you were hexing her, but she's saying that someone else having her hair could be bad juju. And then she actually, the next day we're in like Boston and she comes into your room and like removes the locket hair. Literally, she didn't leave one hair. So I think that...

Which is just crazy But I think that maybe I'm dried up Maybe that put the idea In your head That you needed new hair Yeah so I thought It was like funny Like ha ha ha And so Tana made a tech talk About it Brooke has pubes In her locket And first of all I think you did have pubes In your locket And you're trying To backtrack right now I don't have any pubes In my locket

I can't wink, but I would have if I could. Imagine they're just all on my face now. First of all, his friends won't let him live it down. And I like feel so guilty for having done that to him. And second of all, it was in my head. So like I'm thinking lock it, lock it, lock it. Okay. Okay.

And we just had this pubes in the locket situation. And this girl comes up to the meet and greet. She says, oh, my God, I forgot. And I go, oh, my God, I love your locket. And I look at Tana and I laugh because we just talked about this pubes thing. And she goes, thanks. My dad is in there.

Like you thought we were about to have a funny because it really was. It was right before the meet and greet. I was like clowning you for having pubes in your locket. I'm dying on the hill that the pubes are in your locket. Bad time to say dying on the hill. But then the girl comes up and she's so sweet. And then Brooke, you just thought we were going to have like a little funny like you were going to be like, oh my God, I love your locket. I have a locket. And you and me would kind of chuckle. Maybe we tell the girl about your pubes. I could be like, it was going to be a funny joke between the three of us. But then she told me her dad was in there. And then I had to like literally, I'm not even kidding.

like my jaw hurt from how hard I was trying not to like literally it was gonna hit the ground cry and laugh she ended up making a tiktok about it to the girl she did yeah she was like if you know you know like my dad my dad dad's in my locket like and then Brooke told me that her boyfriend's pubes are in hers and like I really do just think that that kind of encapsulates what a meet and greet experience is like for us okay but just for the record my boyfriend's pubes are not in my locket

They so are. They aren't. It's funny because I actually like, I don't think it's that weird because I saw this TikTok so long ago where a girl was like, essentially. You don't think it's that weird? Because I've been trying to do something with Makoa. Not as weird as that.

This girl was making a TikTok like you're fighting for a text back. Like I have his dread on a keychain. So I've been wanting to do that for so long. Like have one of Makoa's locks of hair on a keychain. Like a little curl. Makoa was like, no, you're not doing this. This is so fucking weird. So eventually I started every time he would brush his hair and lose hair. I started keeping the hair to make my own. OK, see, mine was a joke and yours isn't at all.

No I get it though But then I told Makoa That you were keeping pubes in your locket And he finally said Fine you can have a keychain Oh you're welcome So thank you So honestly thank you so much I'm so excited for my keychain See I knew I was good My joke was good for something It definitely wasn't good For my boyfriend's reputation Amongst his friends Yeah and I just Honestly Miles I'm sorry that I said That you're a build-a-bitch Because he's also not Living that one down No he's fine It doesn't bother him Amari do you remember That time I bled all over Elton John's house

what i'm about to tell that story i fear again i'm touring houses uh-huh and elton john's house is also by the sunset strip in hollywood hills so we were touring a house like right by it he used to live there right um and ashley was like do you remember that time you bled all over elton john's house and i was like oh my god like i hadn't thought about the memory in so long but i just need to tell you how fucking embarrassing this is like i just like

So many of my embarrassing stories I just like completely forget about And I'm like oh my god I did do that So it was Jordan Marona's birthday What were you gonna say Maybe it's because we aren't supposed to tell these stories But it's like it's so good for the The lore Yeah

It was Jordan Marona's birthday and me and Elijah Daniel decided we were going to throw him a birthday party. Okay. And so we're looking at houses on Airbnb because this was before like I had a house. So we're looking at a house on Airbnb to like throw this party in. Okay. And we end up renting this house. We get there and as the guy's giving us the keys, he's like, yeah, Elton John used to live here and he would always throw parties here. I'm like, this is so iconic. And there's Elton John stuff like memorabilia all over the house. And we throw this party and I end up just getting like

Fucking shit face Right Like so Tina So Tina level And especially just Because I was like 18 Like we were so much more Like out of pocket At that time Like coming straight From Vegas Like I didn't know How to throw a party I would just invite everyone And get like Fucking shit face I love that And so I'm hammered And I'm up in the room

Like, and I'm like on my period. I have no idea how this happens, but I go to the bathroom and my tampon had just been in for way too fucking long. Okay. I don't know what happens or how this happens, but I take my tampon out, miss the toilet. I don't know. I don't know. I couldn't tell you. And you don't fix it, right? You just left it. I don't put a new tampon in. Like, I don't know if I was so hammered. Okay. It ends up getting stuck to my shoe and I...

Stuck And I leave There's blood on the walls Brooke Like there's blood I leave and I'm walking On the party for an hour Trail of blood All down my legs Trail Trail Trail Trail Jordan Morona Had to end up Trying to clean it So the Airbnb owner Didn't like Give us a fine He throws up Everywhere He should have Literally sued He throws up everywhere Blood on the walls In Elton John's house And then they ended up Finding me to like Cause it was like On the walls and shit

Do you know what's crazy though too? I talked about this a little on TikTok and it's like, this is now like six years later, right? I still don't have my period figured out at all. Can I just say that? Like it's just like, I think you either, you talked about this on something else or maybe you said it to me, but I will say like there's blood on my light switch in my house right now. Like every morning I wake up on the first couple of days of my period and I just like have to run to the bathroom. It's bleeding down my leg. Like,

And then it's like you put the tampon in and it's like you can't get it out. And then sometimes it's just drier like than a fucking...

Like I'll never have my period figured out. I'm going to be 40 bleeding down my leg or like pulling a fucking birthday card fucking out of my puss like dry ass tampon. I don't understand it. Oh, I don't know. I mean, a lot of you just have a heavy flow. I don't have that heavy of a flow. I actually literally at 27 years old just had my first like extreme bleed through my pants situation.

And I was alone with Lincoln on a flight. Every single period I have, like the first couple days, like it's like it's on my ankle. It's on my ankle. My ankle is so far from my pussy. Like, what do you mean? That just brings me to my next point of just everything being figured out. I'm trying so hard right now to become a person who is type A. OK, but it's just like like.

As I'm just going through all my stuff, I'm also trying to become a minimalist. I'm trying to. But I don't understand how there's time in the fucking day. Okay? It's like you wake up. You're supposed to have a healthy fucking breakfast. You're supposed to take your vitamins and supplements. You're supposed to have gotten eight hours of sleep the night before. You're supposed to be so fucking hydrated. You're supposed to get all of your work done. You're supposed to care about all of your friends. You're supposed to follow up with caring about your friends. You're supposed to wear something cute. Right now, you're supposed to be clean, girl. You're supposed to be this or you're supposed to be that. All of these fucking things. And then you're supposed to clean your house. You're supposed to put shit back as you...

How the fuck do people get dressed every day without trying three things on and then you're supposed to put those things back? - I have no clue. - How the fuck is there time in life to do it all? Like how the fuck are people just naturally type A? - I have an idea. Waking up before 4:00 p.m. - No, no. Fuck you, fuck you.

Fuck you And fuck that Because it's not even that It's like And it's like making meals You're telling me people Cook three meals a day I don't get it either I'm not type A By any means And then they clean up The kitchen all three times

And then they have time to do their job And they have time to be a loving Well it doesn't help that you have like a fucking 5,000 square foot mansion Like it's easier like I live in an apartment So it's not like hard to keep it like together But by myself I can't How do you get dressed without killing yourself? How do you do your makeup without killing yourself? I don't but I come home and it makes me so miserable to live in it That I have to fix it You know what I mean? But I'm not type A Like I'm really not at all Nothing in my life is organized You will not catch me taking a supplement I'm eating McDonald's for three meals a day But

It's just like my own misery that gets me to do it. That's it. Like I don't have time to like clean the fingerprints off my mirror. I don't have time to put like the strapless bra back because I'm wearing the racer back bra. No but it's because it becomes like habitual and like I almost feel like it's like old dog new tricks you can't do it. Like it's like you either grew up that way or you didn't. Like my room looks like someone fucking took a bomb to it right now. Like you're gonna I'm gonna be Trisha as King Tut on the cancelled podcast and I'm not gonna have like eight pair of gold high heels like strapless.

strewn about yeah well luckily you've got help

I know. I just, I'm really trying to change myself. But as I'm trying to instill all of these habits, by the end of the day, it's like I need a tranquilizer. No, but it's because you're trying to focus on too much at once. If you like all of a sudden try to change your whole life upside down in one day, obviously you're going to be like, I'm never going to try this again. It's like if I were to try to like go to the gym tomorrow and try to run nine miles, I would literally like, I would just never go back in my entire life. That too. Like I just, I don't understand how anyone has it all together. Yeah.

Oh my god me neither No nobody but people pretend I guess it's one or the other like I could have a really Hard working work day but then I'm not gonna have a like Healthy yeah like I've been Struggling cuz like my like obviously Murphy's an angel but mouse can just destroy he literally can Destroy an entire house like I woke up This morning and like a dog he has like Destroyed like 20 rolls of toilet paper in Every single crevice of the house and I'm like

Like if I were by myself, I don't think... I think I would have dropped him off at the gas station. And like kids. Like what do you mean people have kids? What the fuck do you mean people have kids? I was going to say, I think that kids might be what helps you... Helps you like...

Because all of a sudden You'll learn new habits No fuck no If my toddler threw SpaghettiOs at the wall I would be like Listen next week Like what do you mean I also have to take them To dance later But your new habits Like you form new habits Because it's going to be Your first time going through Life as a mom So it's like when you Clean up the dinner table After they Like that's your first time Learning it And that's when you get To have new habits No but you're telling me My toddler fucking sprayed shit And now I have to go Like make ravioli That's what your husband is for You're making ravioli He's screaming

cleaning up the sprayage. But then like how do moms have like a slick back bun? I don't know. I haven't gotten there yet. I just I utterly cannot believe like as I'm even just trying to be more put together that there are people out there with little fucking varmints. I know. Like they're put together like Nora Smith. Like there's Nora Smith has got to turn that camera off and just pull a gun on fucking Lucky. Like I would be so sorry.

But I'm just saying, like, what do you mean she's cooking? Fucking, like, what do you mean she's making Capri Sun from scratch in a Chanel tweed, loves her kids, has time to go to fucking fashion shows and sit front row? You know she fucks the shit out of Lucky. Where the hell does she have time for that? I'll tell you what. I think she's that happy because, like, she has such a horny relationship. And not to, like, what do you call it? Speck.

speculate but like you can just tell looking at them that they just like literally they must have sex at least seven times a day and I feel like I would be so happy I'd be like walking on clouds and I would be making fucking bubblegum from scratch if I was getting it like that dude I know it's just it would take up all my time the other day I had like psycho fucking balls to the wall sex midday and it was like I'm not going to clean the kitchen after I got my ass ate I'm exhausted yeah well that's

I slept for six hours after that. What do you imagine that happened? And then like, I have to like pick up the kids from school. Like I can't walk. Like the second I had kids, my husband's never getting fucked again. You think so? Yes. No, I think you'll be so miserable with the children. And that's like all you're going to be able to do for serotonin. Oh my God. I'm like, I'm out of breath even just thinking about it.

You think I'm a sex addict? I don't need to have sex every day, but I need to like have crazy sex like at least once every two weeks. You know, like lately I've been really no, no. Come on, come, come on. We got to give them something. The idea of bringing a taser into the bedroom is becoming more and more normal for me. Like, wouldn't that be so c***y? What did he do to you? What do you mean, my father? To want to punish him so bad. No, I want him to tase me.

No. Or yes, I've been tased. It is so painful. But imagine just a little zap to the ass in doggy. Oh, you want to get tased. Okay. So you're wondering why you don't have energy in the day and you're trying to bring a taser into the bedroom. You're going to be out for the count.

she's like kill me yeah just know Makoa's friends are like in San Diego like just caught a surf someone sending them a clip of this and they're like god why couldn't you have been with like the Hawaiian girl like you know it's just like oh my literally King Tut I'm literally King Tut talking about how I want this man to tase me and doggy and I'm like oh my god I hope his mom loves me forever like it's like fuck

I'm crying. I'm crying off my jewels. Oh my God. It is so bad. This is bad. I'm in a beard. And this always happens to me. It's like the more I'll clown you about something, like the more likely I am to get it. So like, for example, for example, BB has dandruff and that's fine. But I've been, I've been literally making fun of her so much just because I was like, no, I love BB more than literally. Like I've never left anything. Like I love BB, but

It was like our funny joke for a second like if she walked like walked in front of me I'd like pretend to like slip on her flakes like I'm like Like as if it's snowing at all times like her dandruff is so bad that I'm like literally like Choking on it like that was like my joke for a couple weeks And then I went to go brush my hair last night and I saw that I have literal flakes I am dandruffed up. I have the worst dandruff in the world. You could rack up lines of it. Really? I don't know if I've ever well, maybe I

Maybe I've had dandruff before. Well, it's because when I get a bleach and tone, like your whole scalp like has goes raw and then has to like scab over. Yeah. So then that's like the other day, Makoa gave me a head massage. Like I was laying like he was like he was laying like flat and I was laying like on him like we're both facing the ceiling and he was massaging my head and I stood up and it looked like someone did an eight ball off of his black shirt. It was so embarrassing. You're like...

No I'm not kidding It wasn't even fixable I have the word Like you pat my head And like see like But that's a good excuse At least The Alps fall off

And there's no shade to the dandruff community. I just like there's nothing wrong with having dandruff. There's that's not the thing. It's just funny because it's like I've never had dandruff in my life. And then I make fun of her like one time for doing it. And all of a sudden I'm just like, I have some great products for your dandy. Don't worry. You can take them on the way out. Green apple head and shoulders. So really you just have to moisturize your scalp. But did you see that the Kardashians had a screening for Wicked?

At their house and like Ariana Grande came. Yes, I did. How funny is that? First of all, I just love the card. I love that. Like anything that those kids want, like they can just make like, you know, that like Chicago was just like, mommy, can we have wicked at home?

And Kim was like, fine, like Ariana. But how funny over Pete? Like how? Like, oh, it's just like, like what? Like, how did they even get there? Not Pete. No, I'm bringing up Pete Davidson in a fucking King Tut outfit. No, but me. I'm like bringing up Pete Davidson in a fucking King Tut outfit. Kim has always been supportive of Ariana. And I remember when her and Pete broke up, she was posting Ariana Grande songs.

Was she? Yes. So it's like they're probably just so past it. I was just imagining like... I think it's just like a universal experience. Everyone's like, yeah. Imagine watching a three-hour movie and like you know like...

And Penelope were like Throwing shit at the walls Like it's just like Imagine all those kids In one room Like just screaming No who's the bad one Rain's the one who like Wreaks havoc Let me just stop I'm also like It's just I don't need to be Talking about those kids In this outfit It's just like Oh my god I can't even Amari are you ready To come on Miss Malibu Barbie Yeah

Malibu. Oh, wait. No, you're Trisha. Oh, Malibu. And now we welcome Malibu Barbie to the podcast. You look amazing. Holy shit. Brooke, can you believe we made such a beautiful child? I can't believe it. I'm never getting a boyfriend after this episode. No, and Malibu's going to send us a cease and desist. Right. Baby's first cease and desist. That's coming.

oh no that is kind of it's funny more because to me you you're giving me like i wore that dress in cabo on my birthday and those shoes you look amazing that's how my legs look after literally one time being cold do you know so i wore these shoes one time i dressed as barbie for halloween and charlie jordan was having a party okay was that the one that was like super controversial why everyone was like saying that you were showing follower accounts to get in

Oh, that people were showing follower counts to you? You had to like show a follower, your followers. Oh, I think people said that, but that did not happen. I know, that's what I'm saying. Like I will, I will vouch for Miss Jordan. That did not happen. And she is not, she would never do that. But her house like probably holds like a thousand people and like literally like.

I don't know. Here I go with numbers. TanaCon, 20,000 people outside. 5,000 is a lot. 5,000 were at the Dolby Theater. Yeah, like no, Tana Marie. Here's what I'm going to say. Not quite, but... The address just ended up getting sent around like crazy. There were way more people than like where her house could fit. There were so many people outside like down her fucking street, whatever. And I show up and I'm as Barbie and I have this big ass Barbie box, okay? I have this big ass Barbie box. And so I get there and I'm like...

trying not to wait in the line. Like, obviously I was like invited and so many people outside were not invited. So I'm like shoving through people in my Barbie box. And this was when DJ was still alive and I miss him so much. And we grew up with her. So I feel like you get a little more like leeway. It's like, no, we went to high school together, bitch, move. And DJ was still alive and he was one of our closest friends. So he comes out to get us and...

He's helping me just mob through people in my Barbie box. Okay. And I'm not going to lie to you. I did not look my best at this time of my life. Okay. This was a time of my life where I was, you know, if the Crunchwrap was there, I was eating it. Okay. That sounds delicious.

and i knock over these guys with my barbie box right i like hit them all and i'm like move like get the fuck out of the way and i'm holding it like this you know what i mean i'm knocking people with my barbie box i pictured them like flying into the pool like and it was like soundcloud rapper ass guys okay and one of the guys just stands up and as i'm walking away he goes fat ass barbie just knocked me over that would ruin my month it did are you

And you're already feeling like, God damn, I'm just so big and boxy with this outfit. Are you kidding me? I walked in Charlie's house. I walked in Charlie's house.

I was just so defeated. I was like, I don't even want to be here anymore. And I remember DJ was just cussing them out. God, I love him. But it was, yeah. So that's why it's funny. These shoes were just in the pile of shit to get rid of and then I'm already put them on. That's my favorite story you've ever told me. That's why I'm getting rid of the shoes. Because you were never fat ass Barbie. I was definitely giving fat ass Barbie, I fear. Oh God, I don't know how you guys do this. My legs have been shaking literally since I put these on. Aaron,

Erin asked me to go downstairs and get him a water. I was like... You know, you could have taken the heels off. Like, that was an hour ago. You just kept them on this whole time. You're so committed. The straps and just all of it. It's just too much. I don't understand how you girls do this. It's... Who said that? Caitlyn Jenner. She's like, I don't know how you girls do it. It's so funny. I'm wearing heels today. Yes. It's so funny, though, because, like, this is literally me, like, leg hair and all. Like...

Brooke goes, you couldn't have shaved your legs? I didn't know until two minutes ago. First of all, welcome back to the cancelled podcast. Hello. It's actually really funny because, I mean, I know you don't really love Reddit. I don't give a fuck what people say on Reddit. Like, I just read it and I'm just like, you don't know me, whatever. But last episode, Paige and I were sharing a mic and...

people literally thought that I was trying to keep as far away from you as possible. And I was like, you guys were sharing a mic. They even got into like, Oh no, Amari's left-handed. I'm right-handed. Paige and I were just sharing a mic. I know. And they're like, I can read his body language. Like he told me this also, there was like a, at the end of it, I'm like, I'm like, we gotta go. We gotta go. And Tana goes like, let's end Brooks, Brooks over it.

And I got cooked so bad. We had meet and greet after that. So I got so many comments that were like, oh, do you have somewhere else better to be? And we'd already been podcasting for so long that day to the point where we had to like switch locations. I know. I was just like, you know how I get like I get so anxious when I feel like people are like waiting or something. And like, but but then we had the girls. So like we wanted to obviously be like there for the girls. I don't know. Anyway, just know.

I don't hate Brooke Context matters People are so crazy I just love like the way people Like I'm like damn You really have time to speculate No but I did say something wrong In that episode bad I said That I didn't No one cares about Vincent and Sam No I didn't say no one cares I said nobody knows What you're talking about Nobody knows who they are No No I said nobody knows What you're talking about You said nobody knows Who you're talking about Well you know Cause I remember I was like Oh I do

I know but that was First of all I was so wrong And second of all I think I was just like Being a c*** Like I was just like No one fucking knows What you're talking about I also think you don't like To film for long And that's okay I don't and I got grumpy But like you can't do that And like justice for them Cause like they didn't They just caught us Stray out of nowhere Because I was just Being a f***ing c*** Like for no reason And like I watched it back And I was like Damn like

What was she going through? At the end of the day, like you're on tour, you're hungry, you're waiting for your chilies. There was a meet and greet that was already. No, but it's just like something I was saying to Bibi. If she's pissing me off, I'd be like, no one fucking knows what you're talking about. You know what I mean? Yeah. And it's just like, I don't know. I feel like there's a closeness between all of us. And it's like, we all talk to each other in a certain type of way. I know, but Sam and Colby were. Sam and Colby were. Sam and Vincent. Yeah.

It was just Sam and Colby, right? Holy shit. Yes, there is. Sam and you fucking with the

Okay, well now I made it worse. Sam and Vincent, they didn't deserve it and I'm sorry. I love that. Speaking of Sam and Colby, you know, one time years ago, I told Sam that he looks like Ed Sheeran if he was hot and like, I fucking love Ed Sheeran. Ed Sheeran is hot. I've been Ed Sheeran's biggest fan like, for the longest time. One of the first artists I was ever like, knew like, every song on the album front to back. Like, I love him. So I did not think that that was gonna like, he was like,

You're an asshole. I was like, what? What? Sam said that to you? Yeah. He was like, that's evil. That's one of the meanest things someone's ever said to me. And I'm like, wait. Well, you're only supposed to tell someone they look like somebody if that person is significantly better looking than them. I think Sam is significantly better looking than that you're in.

I know, but I'm saying Ed Sheeran should have been significant. Like, if I came up to, you know, somebody and said that they looked like somebody who was way prettier than them or something. I did that to somebody one time. I literally told this girl. I was like, oh, my God. Like, you look so much like do people tell you? No one has ever told her this, by the way. Do people tell you you look like Lauren Gray? Because I was like trying to make this girl's day. OK, I was like really trying to give her a major compliment. And this girl was like, no, no.

And she was like, oh, don't say that. Like something like that. And I literally wanted to be like, Lauren Gray is so fucking much prettier. Like I want to say that because I'm like, no, but like you won't, you are not going to like. You're not about that. Yeah. You're not about to say that like you're offended that you look like one of the most beautiful girls ever. Like you're so fucking weird. I literally want to smack her in the head and say, no wonder no one told you that. Nevermind, bitch. Yeah. I was like, I was floored. I tell you.

I think it was really funny that you were talking about like the bleeding all over Elton John's house story because you guys want to know something? I don't know if you know this story, but back in high school. I'm about to get cooked as King Tut. Oh, yes. Oh, and you deserve to be for this. Back in high school, we'd have sleepovers all the time or whatever. And one day she wakes up before me. Her dad picks her up and she leaves. And I wake up. I'm like, oh, where's Tana? Whatever. I go into my bathroom.

And it's like it's my personal bathroom. I go into my bathroom. This is so unfair. I have no control over this as well. And I'm like, why is there like blood on the toilet? Like I think I'm like kind of like dripping down the side of it. No, like I have no control over this being told. I am so confused. Like like what? Like who is bleeding? And I'm like, OK, like obviously it goes up periods, whatever. I look to the side of the toilet. There is a bloody tampon.

Bloody ass tampons sitting on the floor. I just want to say really quick. She missed the trash can. So you just told me a story about the time you threw a tampon on the floor. Now he's telling me a different story of the time you threw a tampon on the floor. Isn't there a third story about you throwing a tampon on the floor? Like some assistant came out and said she had to pick it up. No assistant had to ever pick up my tampon off the floor. Was I thinking of the Jordan story then? Probably. Yes. Like no, I would never do that. And Jordan didn't have to clean that. I was just so blacked out that he was like helping me. But I was thinking there was a third story.

There's the tampon in Turks. There's the tampon in Turks where I took it out on the beach and I dug a little hole like a rabbit, but I don't want to. Mid-argument too. Mid-argument takes her fucking, takes her fucking tampon out. I know they're not biodegradable either. No, I ended up taking it inside after I pulled down. I don't believe that. I promise, I promise, I promise. I have to clean up this tampon myself because what I'm going to do, there's a bloody tampon on my floor. Like, no, I had to clean it myself.

And I threw up into the toilet instantly because I was so disgusted. The fact that you kept being my friend is crazy. Like in high school, like that's terms for termination. The fact that you just dipped out after doing that is what's crazy. Amari, I promise you it wasn't on purpose. Like I probably meant to make the trash can. I also just flush tampons now. I do too. And you know what? Like, sorry. Nevermind. Keep going. You know, I always know she's used a bathroom too is because the toilet paper will always be like at the floor. Okay. That goes back to my whole type A thing. How the fuck do people

people

It's always at the floor. I know you were about to say put it back. No one else is even detaching it from the wall. No, just no one. It's that my like the sheet always comes down and touches the ground. But I don't understand how anyone like keeps it. She is the only person I've seen. What are you pulling it like this? Exactly. She's the only person I've seen in my entire life. I will always know. It's a two-hand task, by the way. You pull it and then you hold on to the little roll and you rip it off. Well, I just really want someone to say something nice to me. You look beautiful as King Tut.

It's bringing out your yellow eyes. Tana in bathrooms. They are. They're like gold, like gold green. They are kind of yellow. I can't see shit because it's all pink. By the way, I'm really sorry about that tampon. And I'm really sad that it's in the same episode as the Elton John tampon because now it's just like there's no... The Elton John tampon being a real sentence too is just so mad lib. Tampon Tanny. I just... I'm... Yeah. Yeah.

I have nothing to say. There was like this huge controversy online recently because that girl, Natalie Joy... I don't know why I said that girl. I like literally know her. She talked about how she flushes tampons and like the whole internet was like, are you fucking stupid? Like I've never even heard of that. And I'm like...

Never not flushed A tampon I understand If I'm in a place Where there's a sign That says not to I'll follow the rules Or if I'm somewhere With footy irrigation Okay If it look If it's like the toilet Looks like it's like Older than like Five years old I will flush it Or I'll put it in the shower Well like You know what I mean Like if it's a porcelain toilet That's like one of the things Like I don't A toilet is no longer Porcelain these days I

I 100% will make sure when I'm moving into a house that there is like Toto toilets because I'm not, I think it's so gross in the trash can. I agree because I would be so disgusted. Like honestly, like if I went into someone's bathroom and I saw bloody tampons. No, it's more so like the smell. But the smell. Oh, I've never. Well, I mean the smell that I smelt that one time was actually pretty crazy. Well, it's, I know it as the smell of like the girl's bathroom in middle school.

Because that's when like everybody starts their periods and I just know they were like all confused. Oh my God. I'm still that confused, but I will say I do. Didn't you just make a TikTok about how you're like blood on the walls and the light switch or something like that? Yeah. Yeah. Wow. You know what's your best friend in that scenario? A magic eraser. You're so right. No, not for removing spray tans. She's like, where do people find the time to get a magic eraser? Yeah.

No you should have them Like you should literally Have them on your like Countertop Because that is like A magic eraser Can do anything Except for remove a spray tan Do not do that You know that Brooke said That one time on the Cancel podcast That she uses magic erasers To remove her spray tan And then Lauren Gray did it And she got a chemical burn Chemical burn

I'm so sorry, Lauren. And that was kind of the moment that we realized that we can't just be giving advice on this podcast. No, but that was the lesson to the people. Never take medical advice from the canceled podcast. Not that that's really medical advice. You never take any advice from the canceled podcast, except for earlier when we said don't do drugs. Yeah. Um, I want to, can we talk about what I want to tell? Yeah, we can. Okay guys. So last episode that I was on, actually, we were talking about how I'm newly single and, um,

You're going to love this shit. So we had broken up like prior to our breakup and we got back together and you being willing to do this dress like this is so awesome. I was just thinking the same thing. I'm taking a break from my massage because it's literally giving me a come. Yeah, the wig is really fucking itchy, but whatever. And so

we broke up and then we had a talk that got us back together. Amongst this talk, I, when we were in Europe, I had noticed that there's this boy that he was following and they were friends, they were coworkers and stuff, but like,

The guy's good looking and like he's successful and stuff and whatever. I don't know how close they actually are. I've met him like twice and stuff. So it's like, I know they're not like besties. And so I noticed the way that they were commenting on each other's photos after I like did some stalking and stuff. And it was like, there's hard eyes and there's just like all this like stupid like shit or whatever. But at the same time, I'm like, okay, let me calm myself down. Like they could just be like homies or whatever. So when we have this conversation to like get back together and stuff, I was like, okay, let me just...

bring this up before it haunts me. And I say, I say, how close are you? And so, and so, because I noticed some comments when I was talking to Instagram and I was like stalking your Instagram and I was seeing these comments and it just makes me a little uncomfortable. Yeah. And I feel like it takes a lot to make me uncomfortable. Clearly. Yeah. And he was like, it was kind of like a, you're crazy. Like we're just friends, blah, blah, blah type of thing. But I'm just like, but here's what I want to say. Okay. Um,

These comments. Can you bring up the Valentine's Day comment in specific? He posted a photo on Instagram. It was like, will you be my Valentine? And then that would do it for my ex-boyfriend commented on it. Absolutely. Mind you, we spent Valentine's Day together. Like we like had a picnic and stuff. And like it was just like. And I understand benefit of the doubt. You were even saying this in a way where you were like.

I could just be crazy, you know, and like overthinking. It could, like Ari could post something and you could comment on it like daddy hard. It's like you and Ari are that close as friends and like, do you know what I mean? Like he would know. But you also hadn't met this guy enough and if you're dating someone for so long and it is their close friend that they're close enough to be commenting like that, Amari should have met this person more than twice, right? And so then,

I just didn't appreciate that, in my opinion, he gaslit the fuck out of you. Like, you're crazy. That's crazy. Like, what? I'm your boyfriend. I've only met this person twice and you guys are commenting on each other's photos like that and he's good looking and he's gay and he's single. Yeah. Yeah. And you guys are spending all this time together if you guys have worked together. So then today, we still follow each other on Instagram because...

I got to stay lurking. Duh. Um, and, um, I see that they're at like, I don't know if they're at like an orchard or a vineyard or something like that together. But, um, he posts something like of them, like picking apples or something. And it's like, that is so fall date coded. And your ex is so the type to do that as a date. Yes. But it's hard to, because a couple of days prior you posted with your ex. Yes. I was, I was trying to stir the motherfucking pot.

So then was he doing that to stir the pot back? I don't know. Well, he started it by posting practically a fucking nude on his Instagram. Okay, thirsty. But at the same time, like I said, last episode, I did talk about how I got back on Hinge. Also, my teams have been flooded, by the way, with so many turbulent facts.

That are your guys' fans I don't really respond to them But I have also gotten a lot of Genshin Impact players DMing me And now I have so many friends that play Genshin Impact So ha ha You showed us Can I tell you something though? I talked all that shit about Genshin Impact

And then the week later I get an ad for a game Called Travel Town And I just want to say This game is ruining my life It's so funny that you fall victim To like a game ad Like I can't even I just swipe right out of it No I see the ads And I download them all the time Really? I'm like the prime victim For like genuinely gaming ads That's so funny Like I can't even

even picture it but if you think about it it's very me coded like i'm such a like instant dopamine addict whether it's vaping whether it's alcohol whether it's gambling whether it's anything like that so it like phone games get me so hard but this game is so fucking stupid there is sorry this is not an ad okay but if you want to sponsor me i would love to stop spending my real money on it

They actually did send me some energy in the game because they saw that I posted a TikTok about it. So like, that is so funny. I'm trying to stay in good graces. I've spent hundreds of US dollars on it in the past week and I'm literally buying a house. Like I need that for like the tiles in the kitchen. Like I can't, the whole game, all you do is you sit there and you like merge seashells to make better seashells. There's no purpose. There's no final boss. There's no nothing. It's taking over my life. All I think about is Travel Town.

and i talked all that shit about genshin impact it's like at least i almost wish i was at least playing like a roller coaster tycoon like something where i could like build i don't think it's that big of a deal because there are times in your life that you would just sit there and do take a perc set you're right you are right there could be worse but it's just like i never thought i'd be 26 dressed as king tut with a travel town addiction i thought i'd have two kids like i thought i'd have two kids any day now when is it when should we start having kids you think

i'm thinking about it in terms of canceled like if i came here and i was like like got it by the way i think now really like if i wasn't afraid of being pregnant i would already have kids no i wouldn't i'm lying right i'm lying no i just like i'm afraid it's gonna like really like knock me down the like you get your driver's license first yeah yeah you can't be a soccer mom with no van wait can we just circle back though it is always the person they tell you not to worry about oh i'm

sorry I got really off track yes it's always the fucking person they tell you not to worry about and it's so funny because I genuinely like this guy was so unlike people you've dated I almost felt like you had found like your Makoa in a sense that was so pick me I didn't need to say it like that well no but I know what you're saying like he was so like nice guy that like it was like oh my

Such a nice guy. Even with those comments, like in London, when you asked me like, hey, should I be worried about this? I very much said to you that 99% of people you were dating, I would say yes, but this guy is such a anomaly of a good guy. He's nothing like...

like any of us, like no drama, like just so honest. And so it's, it was really shocking for me, the Instagram story today. And I want him dead. I'm going to respond to it later. I don't know if you should respond because then it's also like, what if it reverts back to the whole, like,

We're just friends. Yeah. And then we look crazy. I'm like, and then you look crazy. But yeah, I don't know. I do. I've been feeding into all BB's drama because I'm like, you're not going to do my friend. I need to have BB on to talk about her Bobby Blandino lore. That shit is. I feel like I've been watching a fucking episode of Bad Girls Club with BB's life as of late. But we got to have her on to talk about it. Yeah. She like was selling his D-pop, I think. And then she told me that she dropped it off at Buffalo Exchange. Yeah.

I know and now she's getting like these DMs about the T-pop it's like such a deeply like rooted it's just so interesting like the many different like moving parts there are of this situation we have to have her on to talk about it and like in the dozen of like brown haired blue eyed girls who are involved in this situation yeah they all like have the same exact look it's such a it's so nutty the only question I will ask because I know you just want to talk about it with Bebe is were they like were they dating or seeing each other no it was like it was definitely a situation that I always find myself in where it's like you are walks like a duck talks like a duck does not want to be a duck okay

Like, yeah, he was like they were spending every waking second together. And then she's like, should we date? And he's like, no, it's just hard because it's like when these boys become famous for being hot, they're going to act accordingly. And you always want to hope that they're not. Yeah. You know what he told one of her other one of the other girls? He said that he's afraid of Bebe because he's afraid we're going to talk about him on the canceled podcast. I'm like, humble yourself. And here I am talking about him.

With a fucking mustache on my cheek Look at us right now Yeah It's nothing against them as people No it's just like you don't It's kind of one of those things It's like if you're gonna go for a TikTok boy You have to You have to know 100% Like I think they're so fun I have them at my parties whatever But I just I want Bebe to find someone

Dude BB cracks me though Cause all her characters Are so different Like she'll call me And she'll be like Spikes is on the phone The other line And I'm like Who the fuck is Spikes She was just in her Stepmom era too Like they had a guy That had a three year old Stepmommy guy She had Spikes She had a guy Who she saw For like two years And then told me That he lives in his shed Holy fuck

We need to have her on an unpacker. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We really do. Because I just fucking love her so fucking much. After the show in Seattle, Portland. Portland. It was so funny. We had like a big dinner table rented out. And this big back room because we thought everyone was coming. And then you fucking, you don't come. Everyone doesn't come. So it's just like five of us at this big ass dinner table. And they gave us a speaker because it was like the back room of this restaurant. And Bebe's playing Lana Del Rey sobbing at the head of the table. Like so main character. I forget what she was even saying about that table.

She's like, how do you want your steak? She really does have so many characters, too. I remember for a period of time, like, when Paige was, like... I think it was Paige that was on Raya or whatever. And she would say, like, there was, like...

Like every single boy that she like had like interest in or whatever, it was always like the one friend in common was Bebe. When I was on Hinge, it was every single photo like by Bebalds. I almost thought she had someone else doing it for her. Dude. The devil works harder, but Bebe works harder. But I'm not kidding. She'll be hinging at the wheel. I'll look over and I'm like, am I in danger right now? Like...

That is hilarious She is so amazing I love her Yeah I love her More than anything in the world I really do And I know Bebe's gonna find the right guy And I'm so excited for the wedding Like you know what I mean I just I am She would be the best Like she She is the best girlfriend to me Aww Yeah Bebe is awesome I wanna talk about Smile the fucking movie Have you seen it?

No. You need to go. I saw the first one. So you need to go watch Smile 2. The girl in the second one. I saw the trailer and I was like, someone should get ahead of it with this girl because she's about to pop off. She ate down. It is one of the best scary movies I have seen. Like a modern day scary movie in so long. Really? And they're definitely going to make a third one. It is like so has the potential to be like this generation's like.

You know what I mean? Really? I have a hard time with scary movies sometimes. Smile really fucking freaked me out. The first Smile, I actually left the premiere. I remember that. I went to the premiere and it's in one of those like bougie theaters where all the seats like lay as bed. So there's only like 15 people and it's all like influencers, right? And I have a really fucking serious problem where I scream at jump scares so obnoxiously. I cannot help it. Like I cannot hold it in. Even if I take a little like zany or get high, try to calm myself down. It's still...

I'm screaming at the top of my lungs and we're in this premiere with like Lauren Gray and like 15 other influencers. Lauren Gray catching three references. She's like, leave me alone. This is now the Lauren Gray episode. No, but I couldn't stop screaming and it was like other influencers were like laughing at me. So I left the premiere. I was like, this is too embarrassing. I thought it was because they didn't have alcohol. No, I was sober. I was a

We postmated our own one. I remember Natalie like brought in like seven bottles one time. No, that was the same premiere. I was sober at the time, but that was everyone else's issue. Oh, okay. But so I ended up watching the end of Smile 1 on my own time. And then we went to see Smile 2. Brooke, get this. Okay. First of all, Smile has always like, it really like is one of those movies that freaks me the fuck out. Like after seeing it, I don't want anyone to smile at me ever. Like it's like just very scary. Like it's like. Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Like, that's so scary. Okay, anyways. We go in, and the plot line of this movie is like, she's a touring...

Okay. She's a touring singer. We were two days off of tour. She's like in her green rooms, like doing so many things that like we do. And she goes to like pick up from a drug dealer. Obviously I've been in so many places of life like this. Okay. No longer now, but, and then he ends up infecting her with the smile, like disease. And I'm going to like spoil it a little, but she like,

Like essentially it's like once someone smiles at you and yeah, that's how the first one was right dies in front of you with a smile. You're infected. And like, that's how it like spreads.

And she ends up like going on stage with it at the very end and infecting everyone. Wow. That like literally just got me. I did not sleep like that at all the next night. Like it is such a fucked up movie. It's insane. And it was like just so close to like, like I'm sitting there and I'm like, there's no fucking way this is the plot. Like we're one day off tour and that's the fucking plot. Yeah. That's crazy. And like the meet and greet scene. The meet. That circles me back to my stalker. Okay. Yeah.

there's a meet and greet scene where like a fan comes up with a smile and now I'm going to be like, if one, and it's so fucked up too. After we were leaving the theater, the janitor looks at me and he goes, did you enjoy the movie? Like did it to me? And I was like, Oh my God, I don't be, you don't do that. And then he told me I look like Alex Cooper and asked me if I host call her daddy. So there's that. I don't, I wish I did. She's serving by the way, the fucking SNL, everything. I love Alex Cooper. Anyways, I'm circling fully back to just creepy people at the meet and greet.

You know my stalker and you know his lore. You know everything about this man. And I always say that he like comes in waves, right? Like he'll stalk the fuck out of me and do a bunch of crazy shit. And then he'll like chill out for like a couple months and then he'll be like right back, right? And so the other night after our show at dinner, Amari opens his phone and he's like, Mr. Stalker just DM'd me. And like he doesn't DM you often. Yeah, I get like the least of it because I'm not...

I get the least of it Because I'm like Not a girl Wait what happened to your hair It was getting really itchy I've had it on for some time I know I keep wanting To take my mustache off But I'm afraid of being clipped I'm wearing this Till three days from now Um Yeah

You look cozy. So he's DMing Amari, which usually to me is a flag and a sign that that means he's going to ramp up again. Right. And when he starts reaching out to the friends and like whatever. So I go to his DMs and he DMs me like every single day as if we're having full conversations. And I've always said like, I don't block him. I don't follow him back. I don't engage at all. And obviously even talking about it, I know. Yeah. Could be good or bad, but whatever. Honestly, I have someone sitting outside my house with a Glock nine right now.

Sure do. And I saw him pull it out when I pulled up. Really? Yeah, because there was a crazy outside and he was like... They were literally like having a standoff and I was like... I'm so... I thought I told you that. That's like full glock in here and he's like... You're just like mustache on. He was a crackhead, so it was like fine. Yeah, the crackies are...

Not as scary to me as my stalker, right? Yeah. But so anyways, I go to my DMs with my stalker and he'd been DMing me all day. But do you want to get this, Brooke? You and I, when we walked into our green rooms at the show, at the first day in LA, we look in our green rooms and there's flowers and they let us know that those are flowers from a fan. They were beautiful. They had photos of us attached. They were silk flowers, peppa flowers, whatever. My stalker responds and says, happy to see you got the flowers.

No, that can't be right because the girl who owns the company messaged me about it. Right? I remember Seth saying these are from a fan. Because there were real flowers and then there were a set of fake flowers. I wonder if they were from different... Because each of us got two bouquets. I do remember Seth saying like these are from a fan. Yeah, and she tagged us in it and was like, I figured you'd want these colors because your apartment's this color. So I think they weren't from him. Maybe he sent different flowers and thought you got those. I don't know. I'm just...

I fear we're in the season. He always waits till this time of year too. Yeah, it's a perfect season. He also proceeded to tell me happy birthday. And mind you, like he hasn't messaged me in like months. Like I'm sure he probably messages the girls, but he really leaves me alone for the most part. Can you show me his thing? I want to see if he messages me. What does he say to you? Why does Tan... Well... Sometimes he calls me ugly.

And it's so funny because it's like my own damn stalker. He messaged me the other day and he was like looking a little pale. Oh shit. It's like you're stalking me. You're stalking me. What do you mean looking a little pale? Like if you think he'll be like looking a little tired. Wait, why'd he

He said, I posted that I wanted a baby because I was with a baby. And he said, the things we ask for on the internet when we have willing donors. Oh, great. Oh, man. Got to block him. Don't block him. Which is so scary during Halloween. Because imagine him like at a party in costume. Michael Myers. Oh, my God. It is so fucking scary. Like, he's just so fucking scary. I was showing McCall more photos from the other day because McCall was tripping after the flowers. And I'm just like.

I wish so badly he was like the body type that I could take. Like he's just a big burly ass man. Yeah, that's spooky. I'm watching the Zodiac Killer like three episode thing right now and it's fucking me up. It's so scary. That is like just like whatever. Well, I mean, I feel like we should move over to the Patreon, but I just want to say this is my favorite look we've all ever had. I love it. We love you.

Thank you for also being Elvis. Oh, baby Elvis. We put him to bed. Yeah, we put baby Elvis to bed. But I love you guys so much. By the way, I just want to say, if I was weird on today's episode, so my doctor changed my Adderall prescription. Oh, to what? Well, it's not that. It's like, you know how the shortages are? Yeah. So like the ones I always get like weren't available. And so I picked up these other ones like prescribed to me. But what kind? They're white squares. Oh, okay.

Which is so weird A square Adderall And he's given me These before And I just I remember I took it one time To edit And I never took it again Because I felt Is it Adderall though It's not like Ritalin or something It's like generic Four Adderall Like it's one of those Uh huh You know what I mean But I took it today But isn't that just like Amphetamine salt Yes but it wasn't just those Like obviously It's a white square It's weird as fuck I took it today And I'm touring houses And I'm having to like Hold the walls while I walk Like my spatial awareness Has been so fucking off Maybe that's what happened With the tampons

I'm done. That's how I'm ending the episode. If I'm acting weird, it's because I can't smile. I just...

I feel a little weird and off today, but I can't express to you enough. Being Trisha Paytas' king tot was the highlight of my year. Me too, but it kind of matched Moses' energy because I feel like he doesn't crack up laughing much. That's true. He's always just in my head. He's very matter-of-fact. Yeah. And only speaks when spoken to. There are tunnels under LA. Zach Bryan is on Raya. You should ask Paris Hilton about those tunnels. Yeah, that's a good one. That'd be a good person to ask. That's a good one. Oh my God, I'm supposed to see her tonight.

Oh. And I'm dressed like King Tut. We got to go. Let's go over to Patreon and talk about shit. Holy shit. What are you supposed to do with her? She has like an event. Oh. I guess the makeup's kind of Paris. Yeah. The makeup. At least you're like in glam. The glam in question. Oh, fuck. Okay. We got to go. We'll be on the Patreon talking our shit. We love you guys. Canceled. I love you guys. Thanks for having me.