How to Learn From Your Mistakes: Let Go of Regret & Move Forward
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Each friend male and welcome to the male robbin's broadcast. So I was at mass general hospital last friday getting a mammogram. And here my boobs are all like, smashed up, like a pancake.

If you ve ever got a mammogram. Like, how does my bob do that and your rims are against the cold machine? And then I hits me, oh my gosh.

H, i've never told you story. The one about how I got breasts implants, and then everything went horribly wrong. IT was like a four year ordeal in life.

You're going to make decisions you regret. I know I certainly have. And the second I got those implants, I knew I had made a huge mistake.

Maybe you, then there two a one I stand a bad financial move, drinking too much and then doing things you wish you could take back. That's the story of my twenty stories and forties, or dating someone everybody warn you about them you thought you knew. And it's only later when the whole thing blows up that you're like they were exactly right.

The thing about regret is that IT weigh on your chest, just like those implants weight on mine and standing there in that hospital at the mammogram last week, I knew I was time to finally share this story with you, because this isn't just about implants. It's about the decisions that change you, the shame that you Carry and the courage that IT takes to admit, I wish i'd done IT differently. And if you've ever made a decision that you wish you couldn't do, this episode is for you.

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Hey, mml l, i'm so excited that you're here. IT is always such an on spend time with you and to be together if your brand new. Welcome to the male Robin's podcast family. I also want to take a minute knowledge for taking time to listen to something that can truly help you create a Better life. So last week, I was in our boston studios all week, taping a bunch of episodes that you're gonna freaking love.

And on friday morning, before work, I went over the mass general hospital to have a mammogram, and before a judge in the story, huge shout out to the incredible nurse dirda who took care of me and the team doctors who then did the ultrasound that followed the and while I was there, i'm standing against that machine, you know, on the truck breeze hold in and you're like, oh my got my bob is like now like a fricking pancake and i'm standing there not breathing and IT hits me. I've never told you this story, the one about how I got breaking plans and then everything went horribly wrong. IT became this huge ordeal i'm still dealing with IT IT was a massive health are too.

I wanted to talk about this for two reasons. First of all, to spread awareness about something called breasts implant illness. And please, if you have anybody in your life with implants or that are thinking about getting them removed or thinking about getting on, please, please, please share this episode with them.

I wish I knew everything i'm about to share with you way back when would have changed the course of the last six years of my life. But the bitter topic has nothing to do with implants. IT has to do with regret.

How do you handle regret? How do you learn to listen to your intuition so you don't do dumb things that you then regret? And the single biggest take away, which i'm going to emphasize to you over and over and over again, if you're struggling with something, do not struggle alone.

Because I learned the hard way, that struggling in silence just makes the thing you regret even more painful and the shame even bigger. So let's get into this, and let's just start with the most obvious question. Why did I get present plans? It's a great question.

And you know, as I sit here now that i'm fifty six, I did this when I was forty seven. This is now like almost nine years ago. And I think about where I was in my life at the age of forty seven.

I hated the way my body looked. And i'm a very health conscious person. I want to live a long and viBrant life.

I take care of myself. I eat organic foods. I eat local. I exercise just about every single day. We talk about health a lot on this show.

I'm not putting a tonic chemicals on my face in terms of the products of the makeup that I used I by natural fiber clothing. You're kind of a get logis to this, right? But I hated the way my books looked so much.

I didn't even stop to think about how off brand IT is to take that good of care of your body and then go, oh, I know what i'm going to do, i'm onna get these chemical balls and i'm going to stick amin my body and they're going to somehow helped me feel healthier like I I was even thinking straight. I hate IT the way my body looked so much. And so at the age of forty seven, i've had three kids.

I've breast fed all of my kids. There's also something called gravity. And I don't know what your body looks like, but I will tell you what my body looks like. When I was forty seven years old, my what were once per key amazing kino size B I would say, boobs, they started to look like dirty gym socks that were hanging off my chest.

Another visual that I could give you, kind of a elastic rubber band stretched out, or how about a cow tongue just laying right there? They were so bad, that is, I would stand there brushing my teeth in the morning. And I be looking at myself.

I my nipples were pointing down and in opposite directions and look, i'm like a confident person. I'm a very body positive person. And so feeling that self conscious about my body, especially when I was naked, i'm going to confess something to you.

I'm not sure i've ever told you before at this point of my life with these like skin sex hanging off my chest. When Chris would walk into the bathroom, I just, I felt like I wanted to cover myself up. Now he never said anything to me about IT.

He loves me just as I am. This was up in my head. This was me starting to obsess about something in my body that I just was like, I, this is awful.

And here's another thing that IT was impacting. If i'm being truly like Frank with you, IT was really impacting my ability to be present during sex. Because what I was present to, especially when I was on top, is that i've got like these bags hanging off me.

And and so I just got to the point where, like, I am so tired of complaining about this that I decided i'm going to do something about IT. Now here's the first mistake I made. I did not do my research.

I did not know what I D I was a complete idiot about this. And I think when you get obsessed about something that you want to fix, like I, I, I got fix, I logical out the window. And so once I got into my mind, I know what i'm going to do.

I'm just going to get some small implants that might lift these gym socks up and and turn them into like baseballs that's on look are not looking for, uh, any massive big implant. I was just looking for turkey like baseball size breast. That's what are looking for.

And so I talked to a friend of mine who had recently gotten in plans. SHE looked fantastic. They were bigger than what I was wanting to get. But he loved her surgeon.

And so I went to this one surgeon, did not even do my homework, did not interview three or four people, did not talk to a lot of people that have implants, and hear about their experience, what they regret, what they didn't. I just went with the first person, complete idiot, i'm owning IT OK. I get in there and I casually, kona, say to the stock, what about a lift and he kind of looks at my dirty gym socks there.

And he's like, on the second of work, you just have a yard of skin and absolutely no mass. I wouldn't able to lift that up like you'd lift that up and basically you'd have no boobs and nip zone against your chest. The second work.

And 哦， OK didn't get a second opinion, not at all. And then check this out. You wanted hear the irony of this whole thing, miss.

I'm healthy. I'm taking care of myself. Let's put some chemically laden like silicon balls underneath my muscle. I chose this product called the gummy bear in plan.

And I chose that product because get this the tear drop shape and the textured, uh, kind of cover on them looks more natural. You know we want the fake things that you're doing to look more natural like i'm in tear drop shape. It's got this sort of textural on IT that sounds great.

Is that what my friend got? Oh, no, that's not what you got to got some melt. No problem. Not going to do researcher either. And what I knew is that I lights the fact that they, quote, looked natural.

And I also liked the fact that if, heaven forbid, something were to happen and I were to rush or tair, that sAiling wouldn't be leaking through my body, right? Because when they named that the columby bear implant, IT really was like a gummy bear. If you like, trump down on a gummy bear and you get that jelly.

That's what IT looked like. So i'm like, OK. I mean, so I go for the surgery.

I'm all excited. I figure i'm going to wake up and I am a whole new male robbins. I am going to have these discrete little baseball boobs.

Nobody y's gona know that I have done this. I'm gonna feel like viBrant. And i'm going to be proud, and my sex life is gonna amazing.

And this is going to be absolutely incredible. When I woke up in my own bed after kind of the medication finally were off, I knew that I had made a huge mistake. And i'm not quite sure why I knew then that I had made a huge mistake because I couldn't see what IT looked like yet. I remember distinctly waking up, and i'm kind coming out of the anesthesia and Chris sitting on the bed next to me and I said, how does that look? Because I haven't seen IT yet and he goes, but IT looks big and I said, IT feels big.

I literally felt like I had basketball on my chest and maybe because I felt so swoon and there was so much bandag is almost like my chin was resting, you know, on the top of this mass that was on my chest and my husband said, me, said, well, the surgeon said that your books are two totally different sizes that he had to try, like twenty one different combinations of implants to get the right look. And they kept lifting me up to see what IT looked like and then lower me down. So IT turned out I had one that was one size on one side, one that was another size on the other side to try to sort the whole situation out.

And ama tisa, I was very clear with this surgeon that I want bobs that are thirty six b that's IT. I'm talking baseball boobs were talking perky high school boobs here. By the time the swelling went down and I got the wrapping off and my implants finally settled in, what size do you think I was?

Thirty A W D.

啊哈 啊哈。 And I remember having these arguments with the surgeon where I would go to know, seriously, I just want like the a thirty six P, I just want like baseball size. And he kept gone.

You know, I always have a lot of women come in here after the surgery and say they wish they had gone bigger and I said, I promise you, I will never walk in here after the surgery and say, I wish we had gone bigger. I just want small, perky little. thanks.

I just don't want my boobs flapping against my stomach as i'm trying to have an intimate moment with my husband. I just don't want these skin sacks that look like half filled water balloons to be hung G G. Around my rib cage.

I don't want to have to scoop IT into my bra and and I kind of tuck the full of skin in there. Are you with me? I know I can feel some of you not along.

And so when I looked in the mere and they were like, so huge, it's not what I ask for. It's not what I wanted. Clearly, the surgeon had taken liberties in terms of deciding what he thought was the right baLance for my frame and body.

And IT was horrible. I felt like my boobs came into the room. Before I entered the room, I immediately hated how they looked. I was super self conscious because, remember, I didn't want, I want to know. I wanted this to be like a subtle, all natural thing.

H, and I think it's kind of hard to say you wanted to look on natural if you're going to put plastic objects in your own body, but IT is what IT is. Nine years ago, I knew this was absolutely a mistake. And this brings me to the first thing that I want to talk you about, that when you regret a decision that you made, there is so much shame.

And for me personally, I I just was like, you're a freaking idiot mail because not only you spend all this money doing this, but if you get them out after you've just elected to get them and you know how horrific your chest is going to, you thought that you were actually self conscious before this. Just imagine if you take these things out. And now you've got Frankenstein looking jim stocks, but all kinds of scars and stuff all over the and stretched.

So I just felt like I was the dumps person. I hated how they looked. I felt heavier.

I started dressing in bigger clothes. I started covering up my chest. I hated exercising. I don't know how the heck panel Anderson ever ran in that bathing suit with the boobs that he had, because I could not jog whenever I try to do yoga. You know of any kind of twist.

And like, what is is that like A A, A yoga block in my body? Like I kick at my elbow around that dancing? And then over time, IT went from mental complications and this feeling of regret to literally physical symptoms that I did not realize at the time were one hundred percent caused by the implants.

For example, I started experiencing all this numb ess in my right ARM and tangle ling on my pinky fingers and my elbow and under my ARM pit, my rain od syndrome, which is a condition where your fingers and toes can turn White. I got horrible, like when I would go to the grocery store, if I were to pull something out of a freezer like no frozen franchise, or think of ice cream, my hands would turn right. Weights like circulation gone.

I had a really hard time focusing. I mean, i'm talking more than usual and I, I, I felt something was off, but I started always a premenopausal. Something else is just that.

I'm stressed out at work. And yet, looking back, I know that my body was trying to tell me, get these frequent things at a, and this is something that I didn't even realize. Like when you stick a foreign object in your body, your body immediately sees this as a threat.

And so in the case of an implant, what happens is your body creates, which called the capsule of scarcity sh, around the implant, to try to protect your body from this foreign object. And so what was happening in my body is the capsule was getting so thick, IT was pressing against my nerve dings. And the implant themselves, check this out. IT started to freak and move like my cleavage was not this like kind of Normal cleavage, but IT started like an inch higher on the right side. Then IT was on the left side.

And here's a thing, i've done a lot of things in my life that I regret, and whether it's a one night stand or drinking too much and behaving in a way that you are completely modified by or big financial decisions that i'm like, all my god, why did I do that? And I done a good job of basically either ignoring what i've done, uh, just trying to forget about IT. But when the thing that you regret is actually in your body day in and day out, it's very hard to ignore IT.

And so I felt kind of ashamed that I was so insecure about my body that I paid all this money. And now I had this train rec on my chest IT sounds like I was kidnapped and then drug, and then somebody stuck these in my body. I mean, I did this to myself.

And then because I spent all my money on the surgery, I didn't have the money to try to get them removed. And then I also felt like if I get them removed, it's going to make the situation worse. And it's almost like you've ever had this feeling that if you address IT, then you're admitting that you made a big mistake. But if you could, like, just take a big breath and soldier forward that it's not as big of a mistake as you know what actually is and that's how I felt. And if you're in a situation where you now regret a decision that you did to yourself, like maybe you took the wrong job and you left a great job and now you regret IT or you got in a really unhealthy relationship that everyone was telling you just stay away from that person.

And now you're in IT and you've tried to fix IT because, you know, getting out of IT means you have to admit that everyone else was right and you were right in your intuition as well, but you just ignored IT or maybe you've buried yourself in credit or debt like Christina I did and you are so embarrassed about IT that you don't even look for help on how you get out of credit card dead or one night stand really like, oh my god, I think I have to go get screen for ferial disease. What the hell was I doing or you break up with somebody and then you realize they were the person. And now we've moved done.

I I I mean, you could there are so many ways that you can find yourself in a situation like I did where you see the decisions that you made. You see that you spent six months chasing somebody who clearly was an interested in you. They were just stringing you alone, and you just kept on go on along for the ride, ignoring your intuition.

And i'm here to tell you that IT is Normal to make decisions, that you're gonna regret. And here's the huge mistake that you make, or at least I make this one, is that you think you have to navigate this long. It's that shame and that sense that I did this to myself.

I ignored my own intuition. I ignored common sense. I was a complete idiot. And then you isolate, and i'm here to tell you, do not, if you're struggling, face IT alone. Staying silent about IT makes IT worse.

The only way to get through a hard situation is to lean on other people, your family, your friends, medical professionals. IT is not true that you're alone. You may feel alone.

That's a thousand percent how I felt. I felt alone in this struggle, and I was almost embarrass to talk about IT because I did IT to myself. But here's what I want to highlight for both you and me.

And this is what I would tell myself if I could time travel back nine years ago to just after forgetting the end, which is you're not stuck with this meal. Everybody makes mistakes. There is always a way.

Your job is not to pound yourself the ground for making mistake. Your job is to find a way to make a Better. And there are a million things I could have done.

I could have one to my doctor. I could have gone to a different doctor. I could have talked to other friends that had in plants.

I could have talked to my family. But I was so stuck in the regret and the embarrassment over the decision. You and I did nothing.

I bought bigger shirts and button ups, and I just pretended, yeah, is the creator and really happy I got this. Uh, and that was a huge mistake. Do not face the thing you regret alone, because we all have done things that we regret.

And IT is way worse when you sit with IT, and IT gets immediately Better when you start to talk to someone else about IT. So I live like this for three years like that I can feel in my body right now what it's like to live day and and day out, beating yourself up over a mistake that you made. And you might be thinking yourself, what actually changed me.

And the moment that changed my life is such a pivotal moment that I can put myself at the scene of what happened at exactly the right time. So it's three years later, I have been living with these things, and i've been starting to think in the back of my mind. I have to do something about this, my keynote speaking careers taking off, which means i'm seeing more and more photos of myself on stage and i'm seeing myself covered up and i'm seeing how I look and i'm going that doesn't look like me.

Have you ever had those periods of your life where you think you look a certain way and then you see a photo of yourself and you're like, oh god, like that's what I look like for o OK now look, and i'm all for body positivity, but lets have somebody honesty right now, there are times in your life where you do not like how you look and that's where I was and so it's now gone from this hit my stomach of making mistake to this intuition trying to knock on the door and go now open the shop and let's fix this and when we come back or in to jump right back into the story because i'm sure you're also going, well, meal. What was IT that made you finally want to do something about IT? I will put you right at the scene of what happened when we return, and I want you to share this episode.

With someone in your life who may be struggling or beating themselves up over a mistake because IT would be a marvellous way for you to support them and remind them that they're not alone and there is things that they can do. And while you hit that share button, we're going to hear a short words more sponsors stay with me. Did you know that if you shave, one third of what you remove is skin? what? I had no idea.

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Welcome back is your friend mell Robins. And today I am sharing this deeply personal story, something i've never on the podcast, about getting breasts in plants immediately, immediately hating them, and then living with the shame of this decision that I made and feeling so stuck and so alone.

And one of the big takeaway from the experience of my life that i'm gna keep saying to you is that you are never alone and do not, for crying out that do not try to face something that you're strugling with alone. Don't do IT. There is always somebody that you can talk to.

And so that brings me to the part of the story where i've now been living with these things for three years and filled with shame. I hate them. I frequent hate the implants more than I hated the like skin socks that were hanging office.

So what changed? A great question. And this was such a pivotal life moment for me that I remember exactly where I was.

I remember exactly what I was wearing and exactly what happened. So i'm getting off a plane. I flown into loss figures because i'm giving a speech there the next day at this huge conference.

And IT was a jet lue flight again off, and i'm walking down the hallway to go down the escalator to the baggage claim. And a woman that I know who was also a keynote speaker was coming into the terminal to catch a flight. And SHE yelled to me, and I love her so much.

She's been a huge inspiration of mine, particularly in the keynote speaking business. And we hug, and we quickly catch up. And then i'm like, where are you going? I'm going to cleveland to go to this doctor, and then SHE drops this far.

Ami SHE says, you have been talking about my brain fog, and I have been losing hair, and, you know, my mom died of cancer. Well, that made me start to look into my breasts and plants. And mell, i've learned that my breasts in plants are making me sick.

My breasts in plants are the reason my, my hair is falling out. It's the reason why my hands or em. It's the reason why I have all this brain fog.

And now that my mom is gone, there is no way that I am going to take a chance and leave these things in my body. And so SHE said he had track down the leading surgeon on breasts, implant illness and explore surgery. I'd never even heard the word explained.

I'm like there's a name for the surgery for getting these things out of you. That's cool. And so he said, here's what i'm going to do.

I am going to send you a link to this doctor. You can learn more about her practice and why she's doing this. And then SHE said this, he said, male, I mean, to send you a link to a facebook group, it's invitation only.

It's on a public group. You have to request to join IT. And then they let you in. And at the time, there were hundreds of thousands of people in this group that was all about breasts in plant illness. And SHE said, i'm going .

to warn you.

when you get into that group, you are going to be shocked at the stories at the research about breasts implant illness. And as he was telling me this, I started to kind of feel that pit your stomach that you feel right is like the trailer is happening before a horror movie.

You know, like, oh god, what's gona jump out at me? So I give to the hotel, I crack open my laptop, I request to join the group, and I get letting I spent the next five hours, main lining, everything in that facebook group. I had no idea that breasts in plants can make you sick.

And the amount of research has been done in this is shocking. I can't believe more people are talking about this, that breasts implants can cause auto immune issues, circulatory ory problems, issues related to focus can make your hair fall out. I can cause all kinds of things.

I was completely naive and unaware of all of this, and i'm going to confess something to you. As I was sitting there reading all this, I kept thinking you're a total freaking more more on mal like you didn't even look into this before you got your breasts in plans. sure.

When I picked up the be in plants, I got handed a little pamphlets that probably had, uh, warning wanger jonet that was printed in size like point zero zero four t and the truth is, when you get yourself all excited about something, you don't look at the warnings anyway. You think you're the exception. So to die.

That's why when your friends weren't you, I don't like that person. I think i'd stay away from that person. You go on the date anyway because you think you're the exception.

And so i'm sitting here looking at all of this and i'm jaw on floor. And now, of course, i'm feeling like I have an alien in my body and I need to get this out of my body like now. okay.

And I want to share with you a twenty twenty one study of breasts implant illness that was published by the national library of medicine. There were hundred eighty two respondents in the study. Ninety seven percent of the respondents to the study report that implants have negatively affected their health.

Ninety five percent identify with the symptoms of breasts implant illness, ninety six percent of respondents had implants placed in for cosmetic reasons, and the most common symptoms that are associated with breast implant illness or brain fog, fatigue, joint pain and her loss. Sixty percent of respondents learned about breast implant illness from a friend or a family member or social media platforms, not from their doctors. No warning about the adverse side effects of putting a plastic implant in your body.

And you wanna get this. Forty percent of the respondents in the survey had had their implants removed, and after they were removed, ninety seven percent of people reported relief of all of the symptoms. And that was my experience too.

But i'm jump in and ahead of the story. So I had almost the symptoms and the symptoms that I had, fatigue, joint pain, brain fog. I also dry eyes.

I would break out in these rashes, like around my chest. I had trouble concentrating, memory loss. I had thinking here, I felt depressed.

I mean, all of IT, not to mention anxiety. And i'm going to tell you what I did next. But there's a really important point here.

For three years, my intuition and my body had been going, 啊 啊啊啊 啊啊啊 啊啊啊， no, no. For three years I had known that he was a mistake. I had known that they didn't feel right.

You just know when something doesn't feel right and you're like trying to force IT, whether it's a relationship or financial purchase or no, doing something like I did to my body that I then regretted. And there is something about seeing this facebook group that allowed me to finally here, the truth of my intuition, what had had been saying to me all along. And i'm telling you right now, if there is something that you regret or a decision that you're struggling with, your intuition is knocking on the door.

You've got a open IT. You've got a open IT like you don't have to manage. thanks. What if you made them Better because you're a really smart person and so am I.

But if you get upstairs in your head and you start over thinking, inspiring and all this stuff, you're never going to see that you can always make a situation Better through the way that you think or what you do next. All this information was out there. I could have turned into my intuition earlier, and I could have started to look into breasts, implants and removal.

And I would have learned all this a lot sooner. And i'm telling you this because I guarantee you, if you're struggling with something or you regret something, or you made a huge mistake, the issue isn't your ability to make things Better. The issue is how much time you're spending with regret, which is keeping you trapped in this mistake, because you actually hate the decision that you made.

And ninety nine percent of decisions in life can be reversed. I say that again, ninety nine percent of decisions in life can be reversed. And everything that you do that you regret, you can apologize for to yourself.

For another person, you can learn from IT. You can do Better if you learn from IT. Something's only a problem if you keep repeating the pattern. But if you make a mistake and you learn from IT, that's called wisdom. And here's the coolest thing that I discovered, the second that I started talking about IT, i'd talk about that anybody like I I know that i'm in fixed mode. I don't have shame anymore because now i'm a solution mode.

When you stay alone in your head about the one night stand, now you're getting screen for veneration, al disease or your, uh, you know, you spend too much money on something and you can you can buy groceries for a month and you feel really stupid about your shopping addiction. When you keep that stuff silent, you are gona stay stuck the second you start researching and talking and going, this is something not going to live with. I'm going to figure out how to make a Better IT is amazing how the world just sends the right people into your orbit.

Because what then happened is after that speech in vegas, I then fu to santiago where at another speech, and my dear friend jodie, who has been my friend since elementary school and all that takes us a friend from elementary school, they just drop the truth bombs on. You're right. So we're sharing a hotel room and Sandy ago, that's our thing.

We get a room with two queen beds and then it's like a girl get away. And we anchored around the speeches that i'm giving. We have so much finance. We're standing in the bathroom, in the hotel yet again.

I'm brushing my teeth with my underwear, standing next to my elementary schoolers friend and jody looks at me in the myr and SHE points at my chest in the myer and goes, that doesn't look right and like what you mean she's like a male that in plan on the right IT looks like a half a chicken breast that is just hang and off of you and it's an inch taller than the other one and and i'm like, oh my gosh, a by the way, there's a word for this. It's called contracture. Basically, the scar tissue that encapsulated the implant had grown so hard.

IT was not only pushing against my nerves, IT is literally polling the implant up in my body. And that's why I felt all the nameless impression. And so as duties like I shouldn't look like that, that does not look right.

That's not good work. I've seen good work and that's not good work. Well, and am I great? OK? I may just leave IT to an elementary school friend, just drop a bomb like that on you and think, god SHE did.

Because IT was just more more evidence on lining with what my intuition had been telling me ever since woke up from that surgery, which is these things need to get out of your body. And here's the thing that i'm in a morning I hadn't even gotten the bad news yet. I'm going to tell you what happened after we take a short break to hear a word from our amazing sponsors.

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Walk back at your friend mell Robin. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for being here with me.

Thank you for sharing this episode with people in your life that would really benefit from this conversation, whether it's about implants or it's about regret and learning from mistakes and forgiving yourself and moving on where at the point in the story where that's IT, I am now going to do something about this. I'm talking about IT. I'm sick of living with the mistake in the regret.

I am telling people on researching. So I reached out to doctor lujan fang, who has an entire clinic in cleveland. SHE is dedicated her career to explain surgeries.

SHE is one of the world's leading experts on the topic of breasts implant illness. In fact, he is conducted multiple studies, and SHE is leading the charge on doing research to try to get explore surgery covered by insurance, because it's not. And so I call them up.

I explaining that I had bumped into the friend. They put me on a year long weight list for explain surgery, and I was told that I need to pull my medical records. This is where the story takes a scare return.

So I call my original surgeon who I wanted to kill, uh, for doing such a horrendous job in the first place. And IT took a few days for them to get the medical records because I did have the medical records of the doctor. They had him at the hospital where I got the surgery, and I get the records back.

I send them to doctor fans clinic in cleveland, and almost immediately I get a funk off them. And they tell me, now, holy cow, your breaking plants were recalled over a year ago because they have established a link between that particular breasting plant that you had in your body to a rare form of limper a that is caused by those breasts implants. So i'm now finding out from the x plant surgeon, not the person that put them in me, but from the person is gonna them out, that my implants were recalled over a year ago.

They're not even sold anymore. why? Because I know you're going to ask. I had the allergen biocel textured implants. Eighty four percent of people with this type of rare cancer have the exact same impact. Is now a class action lawsuit.

I was so angry because they had been off the market for over a breaking year, and I never got a single notification from the doctor who put them in me, doctor, fans, team, then expert, ted, the surgery. So I now have a surgery day, and I have the perfect surgeon. There is no doubt in my mind that he is going to do an incredible job.

I cannot wait to get these things out of my body. I have about a month before the surgery y's gona happen. And what i'm now dealing with, which you're going to deal with when you really face something that you regret and try to make a situation Better, is this spiralling of the negative thoughts?

I still had all these negative thoughts that were haunting me, like, first of all, I had spent so much money on the first surgery, and now I was about spent twice as much money to get them removed because it's not covered by insurance. And here's a thing that really kills me. You want to know something crazy about the freking breast in plant industry when the breaston plans kept pulled from the market.

Do you think allergen was covering people surgeries? No, you want to know what they were willing to cover a new set of implants with a pair that was not recalled. I mean, give me a freaking break. So i'm angry about that. And I know that this is something that so many people in a similar situation also deal with.

I mean, I couldn't stop thinking, what if this looks horrible afterwards? And I remember after the surgery of a really good friend that had a double masc to me, and I just had implants put in, and he was saying herself, you know, here i've gone through cancer, and I already feel so beaten up. And the implants that they put in are safe, and they make me feel Better.

And besides, if I then take them out after cancer, like it's still terrible. And so i'm saying this because if this is what you're thinking, IT is completely common. And all I can say, and it's what I said to myself, is you have to trust your intuition.

Nobody can give you the right decision for your body. Only you know what is right for your body, only you know what the right medical call is for your health. And you have to, in these situations, tune out all the fear and turn out all the recommendations and just take in everything and then tune into yourself.

And I just kept telling myself, I know this is the right decision. I know it's gonna be O, K. I trust this surgeon.

And I also know, and i'm going to remind you of this too, that no matter what happens, you're not going to go through alone, especially now that you're talent people about IT, you're not going to go through IT alone. No matter what happens, you're not gona go through. So fast forward, I get to clive on.

I have the surgery. IT was a massive procedure and by massive, I mean, IT was like a six hour long procedure because when they open you up, it's not just pop those puppies out. That's not what they're doing when they open you up.

SHE not only has to take out the implant, but the real danger, particularly given that I had the implants that were recalled, is SHE had to pick out every tiny piece of scar tissue that had encapsulated itself around the implant. SHE also discovered when he got in there, that that freaking surgeon had cut my pectore muscle like right in half. So I had to have like another hundred and forty seven stitches in order to stitch that sucker backup.

And if you're wondering when he took him out, SHE then did an extensive lift with the skin that was still there, which also then proved to me that that first surgeon was working lying. Of course, you can do a lift, but an implant is much easier. And IT does the work for you.

And you probably make a little bit more money because you ve got a product in there. And I know i'm sounding cynical, but the whole thing made me so angry. But the surgery was a huge success, a huge shot out to doctor hanging in her entire clinic.

SHE is a complete artist. I now have baseball size, all natural, uh, bobs. They look perky, like they were in high school.

I could not be more thrilled to have this foreign object out of my body and to have my health restored. Now couple things, my personal experience. The second those things were out of me, I felt two hundred times Better within a week.

The tingling disappeared. Within several months, I could not believe that I had lived so long with my lung capacity constrained, with the nominee's, with the fog in my head. I was unbelievably liberating, which is another important point, because nothing feels Better than trusting your own intuition.

Nothing feels Better than when you find the courage to admit yourself. I made a mistake, and i'm gonna what I need to do to make things Better. And the thing is, though, i'm not out of the dark, I still have to manage the fear that I have about these implants and this connection to this rare form of cancer.

In fact, every six months, I get a mammogram and an ultrasound just to make sure that nothing new has developed. And i'm proud to tell you that after several years, it's been three years of these six months appointments. This last one that I did with the team at mass general, I got the all clear to be able to go back to an annual breast cancer screening.

Holy cow, and that brings me to something that I wanted. Drive home with you. You will do things that you regret. So in life, i'm sure I got a long road ahead of things that i'm GTA regret. It's part of life.

But you always have within you the power to face anything, to learn from your mistakes, to lean into the things that you regret and make sure that you change the way that you behavior. You change your habits so that you don't keep doing IT because, you know, if you do IT once, it's a mistake. If you do IT again and again, it's patter.

There's two totally different things. And you know, one of the takeaway for me from this whole experiences, do your homework. Well, IT sounds dumb that i'm giving myself that advice, but I just got so locked on to fixing what was a problem with my body that I didn't give the decision, the space and the consideration that IT needed.

And the other thing that I learned from this experience is I was quiet for far too long. I hit, I hit underneath baggie clothes. I hid beneath a smile. I hit the embarrassment by not talking about IT. And the reason why I was quiet and the reason why I hit IT is because of the shame and the regret.

And if that's what you're doing right now, you have to tell someone, you know, I hope this story is gonna inspire you to pick up the phone and tell someone about the thing that you're struggling with, or tell someone about the thing, the thing that you did that you regret. Another thing that I learned from this experience, there's a facebook group for everything. I guarantee you, whatever mistake or struggle or regret or shame that you feel, there is a group of people online in a controlled setting who are sharing their stories and simply jumping into that environment.

Even if you do IT under a fake name, IT will make you realize you arent alone. You are not the only person that made this mistake. You know what? You are your human. And I want to remind you of something else that's easy to forget.

When you're in the spiral of self sabotage and you're struggling with something that you regret, there's a lot of things you've done in your life, just like me, that you regret and you learn from him. I am very controlled about my drinking so that I do not say something that I regret. How did I learn that by making a lot of mistakes and learning from him? And so I want to remind you that there is a lot of things that you've done in life that you would do differently.

But the only reason why you know you would do them differently is because you learn from IT. This experienced thing that you regret is teaching you something, and perhaps what is teaching you is that your intuition has been right all along. You just need to slow down and find the courage to listen to IT.

IT is never too late to clean up a mess. IT is never too late to learn from a mistake, and any regret that you have, IT will hat you unless you are willing to talk about IT. And here's what I truly want you to remember.

We all make decisions that we regret, but it's not the regret that defines you is what you do after. It's the choice and the decision that you make to face IT, to learn from IT and then move on from IT. If the shame, the guilt, the what if s they don't have to hold you hostage anymore.

In fact, i'm inviting you to allow you to lift you up to become stronger, wiser and more compassionate. Ask yourself this question, what if this isn't the end of my story, but the beginning of a new chapter? Because, remember, regret is just a form of self punishment.

And here's another thing to understand about what a colossal horrent ous waste of time IT is. The biggest mistake that I made once the implants were in was staying quiet. And you do that because of the shame in the regret that you feel.

And if you're still swelling and regret, are you struggling to move on from a mistake that you made? Here's what I know IT has told on you. And IT is a gigantic waste of time and energy.

There's not a single story that you can tell me of a human being that regret something and somehow regretting brought back the moment from the past and allowed you to fix IT regret is punishing yourself for the past. The opportunity is for you to no longer be quiet, but to open your mouth to talk about the mistake that you made, to ask for help. Because the second that you do that, you start looking to the future, you realize that you do have more power.

Your mistakes or the regret that you feel can only define you if you allow IT to see there is power in what you do. Once you realized you've made a mistake, there's power in you making a decision to face IT, to speak about IT, to learn from IT, to make a Better. You can push past this.

You can learn from IT. You can come stronger, wiser, more compassionate. You could even have perky high school boobs if you want.

So ask yourself this, what if this mistake isn't the end of the story, but the beginning of a whole new chapter? The second that those implants were removed, I felt this enormous sense of freedom. I could breathe Better.

I felt lighter. I felt the burden of everything that i'd been beating myself off over was lifted. And i'm telling you something that my invitation, I want you to picture this mistake that you made and the regret that you feel almost like an implant.

It's something that is inside you that you Carry around. And at any moment you can decide to extract IT. You can speak about IT, you can learn from IT, and that is exactly how you move on. As i'm really reflecting on this and where you might be in your life.

It's easy to forget that you're human and I don't know about you, but I tend to learn more from my mistakes than from the things that I do, right? And this was a big mistake, and he taught me a lot. And one of the things that had taught me is that regret is something you choose to Carry with you, almost like a psychological implant.

You make a mistake. And when you make a mistake in life, you always have two choices. You can learn from IT, or you can beat the hell out of yourself over IT.

And for far too long, I made myself miserable. I made myself feel terrible about the mistakes that i've made. There's a Better way to live.

You can free yourself from this burden. And the first thing you need to do is to stop being so afraid of this mistake that you made. Stop bashing yourself over IT.

And the only way that you're going to stop that bashing is by speaking up, by asking for help, by leaning and and doing the research, by finding a group of people that have dealt with the same issue. And those actions make you feel less alone. And you want to know what else has actions? Do they empower you to see that there are things you can do.

There's always something that you can do. There's a different way to look at something. There are options to make something Better. But the most important thing is learning from the mistake.

If you allow yourself to do that, you will free yourself from the regret that you feel, and you will be able to stop looking at the past and start creating a Better future. And you deserve that. You do.

So, whatever IT is, here's what I want you to remember. We all make decisions that we regret, and you and I are going to make some decisions in the future that we are defining gonna regret. You are not going to make a bunch of mistakes that we spend a little time beating ourselves up over because, you know, if you make a mistake and you feel bad.

So mentally healthy response for a day or two, but you've GTA be able to learn and move on from IT because it's not the regret that you feel that defines you. Unless you allow IT to your power isn't what you do. After the mistake that you made, you get to decide how you're going to face IT.

You get to decide that you're going to learn from IT. You get to decide that you have the power to make any situation Better, to make your life Better, because it's true, you do. And so if nothing else, I hope that this story that i've told you and the lessons that i've learned from IT have inspired you to give yourself a brick, to free yourself from all of this shame and realize that you do have power over the situation.

There are things that you can do or learn. Make IT a little bit Better. You can make a plan. And finally, as you've been listening to me tell you the story, you are probably thinking about someone in your own life who needs this reminder.

Maybe they are not listening to their intuition, or they're ignoring symptoms, or they are stuck in this cycle of constantly feeling ashamed of the mistakes that theyve made the past, or beating themselves up over something that they did. One of the hardest things in life is realizing you can't make someone else get Better. You can't free someone else from the regret that they may feel, but I didn't say you couldn't help them learn how to.

At some point, the person who made the mistake has to choose to forgive themselves. It's almost like an explain surgery that you do for your soul. In your mind, you remove e, this toxic thing inside you that makes you obsess over the mistake and the regret, and just fills you a shame that, honestly, the first step is deciding that you're sick, tired of suffering over this, and it's time to make a decision to do something about IT.

And so share this episode with anyone in your life who could benefit from the story. And a reminder that everybody makes mistakes. The real power is in learning from them. And thank you for spending time together with me and listening to my story. Thank you for sharing this with people in your life who may have implants or are thinking about getting implants and thank you for taking this topic seriously.

I know you're going to share this foreign wide, which is gona help me with this mission of getting the information out there and thank you for taking everything to heart about the mistakes and regrets that we all have and how to move beyond them. And in case someone else tells you this, I want to be sure to tell you, because i'd regret IT if I didn't, that I love you and I believe in you and I believe in your ability to create a Better life. And I know absolutely everything that you and I talked about today is gonna. You do IT already. I'll see in the next episode.

On because that I let the fear in the shame creepin. I felt shame because I felt like, yeah, okay, got IT in. Okay, i'll do one more time.

And I think we did an excEllent job of widing IT out to anything. Terminal, terminal. I can even speak right now.

terminal. Just kidding. Have fun, bud. He's like, I don't think I need to hear this saving.

Oh, and one more thing I know, this is not a blue ber. This is the legal language. You know what the lawyers, right? And what I need to read to you, this podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes.

I'm just your friend. I am not a license therapies, and this pocket is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist or other qualified professional. Got IT good. I'll see in .

the next episode .

stitcher.

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