cover of episode Michael Kosta Covers the DNC Kickoff in Chicago | Gov. Gretchen Whitmer

Michael Kosta Covers the DNC Kickoff in Chicago | Gov. Gretchen Whitmer

2024/8/20
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Michael Kosta recaps the DNC kickoff in Chicago, covering the convention's themes, celebrity appearances, and a giant inflatable IUD. He discusses the Democratic party platform and jokes about the recycled Biden platform.
  • The DNC was held in Chicago.
  • The convention's themes were vague.
  • There were rumors of surprise celebrity appearances.
  • A giant inflatable IUD named Frida was displayed.

Shownotes Transcript

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When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Doan of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, wherever you get your podcasts.

You're listening to Comedy Central. From Chicago, some of the world's most inedible beans. It's The Daily Show's Indecision 2024. A Democratic National Convention broadcast with your host, Michael Kosta. The Daily Show's Indecision 2024. I'm Michael Kosta. And we are in Chicago. Oh man, awesome.

It's great to be here. It's great to be here. The weather is beautiful. I now get why you all live here, because it's like this year-round. Unbelievable. Plus, it's an hour earlier than New York, so I get to start drinking at 9 instead of 10 a.m. Very Chicago. But, hey, enough about me. We're here for the Democratic National Convention, so let's get right into our coverage of Indecision 2024. As of tonight, the DNC is officially underway, and to hear Democrats tell it, it's going to be a hell of a week.

- Your eyes are on Chicago. It is game day for the Democratic Party, the kickoff of the Democratic National Convention. - America's Blue Party awash in fresh optimism. - Everybody and their mama's trying to get the hottest ticket in the Windy City. - Frankly, it'll be like a rock concert. I think people are gonna be cheering and pretty excited. - Let's go, Democrats! - Yeah, let's go, Democrats! You know, the dumber your hat, the more energy you always have.

No one ever puts on a donkey hat and is like, you know what, let's stay in tonight. But of course Democrats are excited because this is a chance for them to lay out their specific vision each night. And let's hear what you got.

New this morning, we are learning how each night of the convention will highlight her vision for the country. Tomorrow's opening night's theme, For the People. Tuesday will outline Democrats' bold vision for America's future. Wednesday, they're calling a fight for our freedoms. And Thursday, a message for our future. A bold policy move by the Democrats. Tuesday is for the future, and Thursday is also for the future. LAUGHTER

How do you have themes that are so vague and then still run of ideas by Thursday? This is like when the Fast and the Furious movies ran out of different ways to say that the movies would be fast and furious. Too fast, too furious. Faster and more furious-er. The fastestest and furiousest. We get it. The car goes vroom, all right?

But it's not all going to be as vague as their daily themes. The Democrats also released a very detailed party platform. And you can tell how much time and energy they put into it because they forgot to replace Joe Biden's name with Kamala's. And that's not just lazy, guys. It's risky. Joe Biden's going to read that and be like, gas up the Corvette, I'm going back in. But look...

Obviously, there's going to be some policy talk during the DNC, but is there going to be anything that's more fun than that?

We'll have some celebs on hand at the Democratic National Convention. It kicks off today, and it's got a few notable celebrities that are actually set to host this week's event. So starting off, we have Scandal stars Kerry Washington along with Tony Goldwyn. They're among the hosts for the four-day convention, as well as comic Mindy Kaling and The View co-host Anna Navarro. Rumors are swirling, big time. Everybody's talking about it, that two of the biggest names in music, Beyonce, Taylor Swift, might make appearances.

Holy shit, did you hear that? A completely unsubstantiated rumor about Taylor Swift and Beyonce. But in the meantime, give it up for Ana Navarro and Tony Goldwyn. Why are our news reporters talking out of their ass like that? This feels like hosting a birthday when you're 13 and being like, hey, my cousin says he knows Tony Hawk, so I don't know, he might show up.

But even if you can't get into the convention itself, there's all sorts of things to see and do around town, like this thing. The Planned Parenthood mobile clinic has also just arrived. They'll be offering free abortion medication, IUDs, and vasectomies. A group called Americans for Contraception has a 20-foot inflatable IUD near the United Center. They've named it Frida. Frida! Frida!

Its name is Frida? That's a little confusing. The name Frida makes me think of my little old grandma, which actually is my preferred form of contraception. Actually, the truth is Frida is short for "You are free, da jizz inside me." I knew Chicago would love that joke. Now, some men are out there and they see this and they're asking, "Is a regular IUD inflatable too?"

And the answer is yes, okay? The way an IUD works is you inflate it, you insert it into the uterus, and it waves its floppy arms like, get out of here, sperm. Get out of here, shoe. And while you're here, buy a Nissan. And mobile vasectomies, look, I'm not ragging on it or anything, but if I'm going to get my balls operated on, I'm going to need to be in a structure that won't 100% get towed. Now, for more on this, we go to Grace Kuhlenschmidt. Grace.

Grace, the Democrats are really emphasizing reproductive rights this week. Absolutely, Michael. This week is all about genitals. They've got the vasectomy vans. They've got the inflatable IUDs. And look, right behind me, they've installed a giant clitoris. Actually, Grace, I think that's the bean. Yeah. All right, Grace Kuhlenschmidt, everyone. Look, look.

But while the DNC kicks off, the rest of the campaign is continuing. And Donald Trump is laser-focused on the issues that are most important to American people. They said, "No, her biggest advantage is that she's a beautiful woman." I'm going, "Huh. I never thought of that." I'm better looking than she is. I'm a better-looking person than Kamala. "Than Kamala." Just so you know, man, just because you wear more makeup than Kamala doesn't mean you look better.

Meanwhile, Kamala Harris and Tim Walz just finished a bus tour of Pennsylvania, and it seems like they had a good time. You know, you got Tim Walz handing Kamala Doritos, Doug Emhoff also handing Kamala Doritos, Kamala looking at that display case, wondering how long that hard-boiled egg has been there. Just have the Secret Service try it, Kamala. That's what they're there for. By the way, you just know Tim Walz is the happiest guy in the world to be spending this much time on a bus...

He's probably on the bus. He's got his own map. You know, he's giving the driver advice. Oh, you could take the 34 to the 16, but honestly, the 7 to the 53, they got better rest stops. But Walls has also been carving out time for his own campaign rallies. Over the weekend, he had a rally in Nebraska, where he grew up. And while he was there, he threw down the gauntlet in a very Nebraska way. Do you think J.D. Vance knows one damn thing about Nebraska? No.

He's going to be here next week. You think he's ever had a runza? You think he's ever had a runza? That guy would call it a hot pocket. You know it. Every one of you in here knows. Extremely regional slam. Walls got him good, I think. That was the most specific pandering I've ever heard. I had to look up what a runza is.

It's basically meat stuffed inside bread, and apparently it's a regional favorite in Nebraska. Although I always say if regional meats are so good, they'd be national meats. And if that didn't happen, maybe they weren't ready for the big time, you know? For more on the runs of debate, we go live to Jordan Klepper. Jordan. Jordan. That's right. Jordan. Jordan.

Jordan, does all this regional pandering actually work? Absolutely not, Michael. Voters are savvy. And this kind of pandering is treating them like idiots. You know, focus on the issues. Like, how is Tim Walz going to sustain a bull market? Because everybody loves the bulls. Go bulls, you know? All right, so...

Okay, so we agree. No pandering. Stick to the issues. Yes. Walls needs to cut out the food talk. Focus on the substance. Beef it up. Make it spicy. And everyone, everyone knows the only way to do that is to throw a little jardiniere on there, you know? Who's with me? I don't know. I don't know what that reference was, but obviously you're also pandering to this crap. Oh, what? No. No. No, look. Michael, no. I'm going deep on the issues. Deep like...

Deep like this town's delicious and far superior pizza. And I gotta tell you, I have to tell you, Michael, if you have a problem with that, just call me Lou Maldotti, captaining the good ship Pequod, because the truth is my numero uno, Florida. So, yeah. Oh, also, Giordano's.

Come on, man. This is cheap. I mean, I can rile a crowd up, too, if you want me to. Like, uh, oh, hey, the Willis Tower isn't as high as the stakes in this election. Stop. Nobody wants your stupid architecture references, Costa. If I wanted a legitimate architecture tour, I'd take the L down to the West Loop, swing by Portillo's, head to East Wacker, hop on a Wendella tour boat, gaze off at the slender faces of the architect, Mies van der Rohe. So...

Ease up, Costa. Ease up on the pandering. These folks can see it from a mile away, like the f***ing Willis Tower, all right? But I said Willis Tower, too. Yeah, but you suck, you know, just like the Packers. Let's go, Chicago. Vanderro! Vanderro! Vanderro! Vanderro! Marty, when we come back, we take a guided tour of this great city, so don't go away. But I said Willis Tower. But I said Willis...

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When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Doan of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look on Apple Podcasts.

BACK TO THE DAILY SHOW. THE DEMOCRATS COULD HAVE PICKED ANY CITY TO HOLD THE CONVENTION, SO WHY CHICAGO? OUR OWN JORDAN KLEPPER SPENT THE DAY WITH A LOCAL TO FIND OUT WHAT CHICAGO HAS TO OFFER.

- Beautiful Chicago, my old term, where I spent nearly a decade doing improv comedy and posing like a hip hop magician. But this isn't about me. It's about showing the exotic hotspots Chicago has to offer. And I've got a little help from a local billionaire. For Tour Guide, I'm here with Governor J.B. Pritzker. We're gonna see that Chicago is more than just Wrigley Field and a bunch of drunk folks in bars, right? There's culture here. What are we gonna see?

We got blues. We got the lakefront. We got museums. I love it. We're a foodie town. We are going to get to that. I used to drink here. We got to get a drink. Let's go. Yeah.

I saved my old plate. It's perfect. To get in the right mood, we need a local delicacy. Malort is a Chicago special. So if you come to Chicago, I mean, if you want to be like Chicagoans, you've got to have a Malort. Yes. It's a lovely liqueur made here in Chicago, and it tastes like it was made here in Chicago. And it's unleaded. I love it. Cheers.

Oh, that's some of the best Malort I've ever had. That's delicious. I have this aftertaste like I was sucking on the leg of a wet dog. It's DNC week. The convention is here in Chicago. Why Chicago? Well, you know, we've had more political conventions in Chicago than any other city in America. They haven't always gone great.

The demonstrators repeatedly tried to march on the side of the convention. Things have changed quite a lot. And there are protests at every convention. But the truth is that here in Chicago, we protect people's First Amendment rights, and we're going to put on one of the best conventions ever. There's no city that has a better summer than the city of Chicago. This is like the Olympics for people who are not athletic. I know this doesn't sound exciting to you, but every delegation, 50 states, all day there are going to be meetings among Democrats about

the party platform. You're right, that doesn't sound exciting. You see what the RNC did? Hulk Hogan? They got Hulk Hogan, Kid Rock. How do you beat that? What are you going to get, the guys from Jackass? Honestly, this is going to be the most energetic convention that you've ever seen. Unfortunately, I've seen what their energetic convention can be like. Hillary Clinton was out there doing the Macarena like nobody's business. So I actually think this is one of the great moments in her story.

I wouldn't attach that to her story. Keep it in history. Chicago has been known for corruption in the past. Now, Republicans are criticizing Kamala for getting in through, as they would put it, inside maneuvers. How does the party square something like that?

Are you kidding? Donald Trump tried to steal an election. He has one insurrection. That's always going to be, you're going to tar him with that? Yes. And by the way, he says if he doesn't win this time, he's been cheated. I got to ask you, the governor, big question.

Is the bear a comedy or a drama? Okay, I don't know why it's in the comedy category, but I gotta say it's one of the best shows on TV. And it shows off Chicago. Let's go see some of the beautiful Chicago culture, shall we? Let's do it. All right, put it on the Pritzkers. Look at that, you can always say it back into the day. Okay, maybe we just hit one more bar before we get to that. Did you hear that? That's great. No. Yes.

You know, this empty bar takes me back to my improv days. The audience's response back then. - All right. - But you do it because you love it. - Okay. - Yeah. Cheers. Okay, museums. - Are we talking museums? - No, we're going to museums. We gotta do this. Let's see this town, this beautiful town.

Governor, a lot of culture here. So much good architecture in Chicago. It is. Well, you know, that started with the Great Chicago Fire, everything getting burned down, all the great architects and artists and entrepreneurs. I used to drink here. We've got to get a drink.

Let's see you again. You got a green line? Let's do it. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Were you surprised about Biden stepping down? I was. I really was. It happened so fast. It was about noon on a Sunday. Oh, yeah. It was a Sunday. I remember that because I was in a church, not at a bar. I was at a church. And a lot of us...

were concerned about the direction of the election and whether Joe Biden was going to be able to be competitive because the polls weren't looking good. In this moment, are you in a text chain with other governors? Well, actually, there were governors talking. The governors push him out? No, no, no. You weren't nudging an old man? To be clear...

To be clear. They're like walking by him on the sidewalk, doing the governor shake over here. Listen, Joe Biden's tough. Anybody's going to nudge anybody. He's the one nudging somebody back. Oh, don't give me this. Look how tough he looks on a bike bullshit. He's a tough guy. He really is. And he understands politics better than most. And we don't have any time to waste. Kamala Harris is our vice president. We all voted for her.

So she's the one. And picking Tim Walz, I think he's actually the perfect pick. Immediately, of course, he's coming up with hashtags, you know, balls to the walls. That's the first thing you do? This is what my taxpayer money goes to? It was a Sunday. I'm paying for balls hashtags. I mean, maybe. Buy the drinks. Okay, I got it. I got it. Unbelievable. Enough of the distractions. Museum, where do we have to go?

Well, you gotta go to a museum of contemporary art. Of course. The Art Institute, it's got the beautiful lions in front. Don't forget the Field Museum, right? Natural history. There's culture in this town that you have to focus on. Oh my gosh, we're at Riggs-E-Field! I love it. We gotta go. It's great history, let's do it. Let's do it. Oh my! Walking into a bit of Chicago history is intoxicating. I can smell the stale hot dogs and tears of defeat. Look at this. Huh? Huh?

Beautiful day to be here at Wrigley. Every day at Wrigley is beautiful. Yes. Okay, so no baseball today.

No, but when this place is full, it is amazing. - It seems to be setting up for a concert. This is America's pastime, watching other people do work while you sit on your ass. Let's go roadies! - Let's go roadies! - Union roadies. - Union roadies. Let's go union roadies. By the way, I have some parking tickets. Can you help me out with that? - I cannot help you with those parking tickets, sorry. I can buy you a beer, that's what I'll do. - I'll take it.

Thank you, Jordan. When we come back, Mr. Governor, Rexon Whitmer will be joining on the show. Don't go away. Thanks for coming, Governor.

When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Doan of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, wherever you get your podcasts.

Welcome back to The Daily Show. My guest tonight is a two-term governor of Michigan and author of the best-selling book, True Gretch. Please welcome Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer. Aren't they great? Aren't they great? All these people who love you who aren't even legally allowed to vote for you. You're a Michigander.

I'm a Michigander. It dawned on me today, and this audience might not like this, but it dawned on me today that one of the best parts of Chicago is the lake. And one of the best parts of Chicago is Michigan. Right? Boom! I think one of the things people love about you is that you have grit and you seem tough. And you talk about this...

You talk about this in your book. You talk about as a kid, someone pushed you down, knocked your teeth out. Yeah. What age was that, that that happened? It was about eighth grade. It was church camp. Where most, so much violence can happen at church camp. And then throughout your life, even in the chambers while people are voting, you would pop your teeth out to mess with them, right? Yeah. We have a picture of what sometimes, I mean, this was in the book.

I love this. I mean, it's like, what is that? What is that picture? Where is that picture? That was in high school at some point. I used to play in the Gus Mackerd tournament, three-on-three basketball, and I was eating a Tootsie Roll on the way, and both my teeth came out before the game. It was a nice, you know, got in their brains. Is that...

That's a physical toughness, but now in politics, it feels a more emotional toughness. Is that right? Yeah, I think so. Yeah, yeah. You know, one of the nicknames I've earned over the last few years is Big Gretch. Yeah. And... Big Gretch.

My all-time new favorite nickname. It used to be Gravity Gretchen because I fall down a lot, hence the T. But during COVID, I talk about it in the book, but during COVID, when Donald Trump turned his ire to me because I observed there was not a national strategy when he told us he's not a shipping clerk, we need to go find masks ourselves. He got mad and so turned his attention to me and I started getting threats and all of that.

And at some point, someone on my staff said, "You know that people are starting to call you Big Gretch, right?" And I was like, "What is this?" -Well, and we were listening to G-Mac Cash's "Big Gretch" song downstairs, yeah. So a whole rap song was written about you, which is pretty cool. -It became a thing, you know? -Yeah, right. -The people of Detroit bestowed this nickname on me 'cause I was taking so much heat from the White House and doing what I could to save people. And so this was --

Someone likened it to being bestowed a key to the city. Yes. When the people of Detroit give you a nickname like Big Grutch. Okay. On page two, the second page of your book, you talk about your grandmother, Nino, and how she said, always look for the positive in people. And I love this quote. It is, even the meanest person might have pretty eyes. Is that a way to govern? I mean, is that...

You know, a lot of people maybe sadly were introduced to you through the kidnapping story. Yeah. How do you see the positive in those people or in that situation? Can you? Well, they say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Right. So there's the positive. That's true.

You know, I've learned so much. And in the last six years, when you get tested, you see what you're capable of and what you're made of. And you also know who you can count on and who you can trust. And so there's a lesson in every tough story. Right. Yep, and there's... Yeah, yeah.

You're the governor of the whole state. Your supporters love you, but there's people on the other side that maybe didn't vote for you that are still mad about some COVID restrictions, that are having a hard time paying their mortgage. How do you bridge the gap with them? How do you speak to them? What do you say? I think it's showing up. You know, I know that I don't have every person's lived experience. I'm learning when I'm asking, what can I do that will make your life better? Yeah.

How do I govern in a way that gives you a path to prosperity or takes a barrier out of your way? I love to get around Michigan and ask that question. You know, if I'm lucky enough to get elected, what could I do for you?

And people are not shy to tell you when you ask. They will tell you things you never imagined. But over and over again, when you hear something that is recurring, you know this is a real problem that people, regardless of their politics, need me to solve. Fix the damn roads was the initial response. And that's why I'm so focused on infrastructure. Yeah.

A brilliant platform because as a Michigander, I've said that to whoever's listening, and apparently you were listening. You put it on a bus and your bus was listening. I have to ask you this because I don't often get the opportunity to sit down with the governor of Michigan, but as a Michigander myself, I love our Great Lakes. I love that 20% of the world's freshwater is sitting amongst us. I've lived in Los Angeles. I've toured through Arizona.

They want our water, okay? And in all reality, what are you as governor doing to protect our Great Lakes? Is this important to you? Absolutely. So the Great Lakes, 21% of the world's fresh surface water. This is a big... I said 20, and she was like, it's 21, mother... You heard that. That's good.

So, you know, I'm working hard to make sure that we protect the Great Lakes and we make Michigan a place where people move to for opportunities. So I would welcome you to come back to Michigan. Enjoy the lakes. And then maybe you and I can reenact the Klepper Pritzker bar crawl. Oh, that would be fun. I haven't gone drinking with Klepper, but I bet there might have been a bucket there where he was kind of like, you know...

There's a lot of energy for Kamala right now. There's a lot of momentum. I'm fearful, though. I'm fearful that Democrats aren't thinking a few steps ahead. Trump is throwing his tantrums. He's mad that she's doing well. But, you know, he's a competitor. He's gonna pivot. He's gonna come back with something. Are the Dems strategizing many steps ahead? I believe so, but what are you anticipating?

Then what? Am I... Are you kidding me? What's he going to do in a couple of weeks? I mean, I think he's sitting at home watching the energy, the enthusiasm, the optimism that's going to come out of this week. And I think it's going to hurt his brain. Yeah, well, it is... It is hurting his brain. Okay.

Okay, let's hope that happens. Let's prepare for him to get his head on straight and stop throwing a tantrum like a four-year-old. He's acting like a four-year-old. Eventually, they calm down, and they figure out the weak spot. So I'm just hoping the Dems are... Are you in touch? You're a co-chair on Kamala's campaign? I am. I mean, how does that... Are you strategizing? Are you talking long-term? Well, I mean, this is...

Michigan is Michigan, right? There's Wisconsin, Pennsylvania, Michigan. These are the swingiest of states, and we are going to decide the outcome of this election. We've got to show up. We've got to do the work. We've got to be in all 83 counties. We cannot write off a place because it looks Republican in past elections. We're going to show up, and we're going to pull people in because this is half the battle. You talk and hear a lot about your gratitude journal, which I love.

Be specific with what you're thankful for, what you do. But sometimes, do you ever just write down super annoying shit? You know? You've had some bad stuff that's happened. Do you ever just write down, well, this sucked. Today, people tried to f***ing kidnap me. It's tempting. It's tempting. But no, but there are some days where it says, my dog's my bed and tequila. Right. Yeah. You have that in here. Yeah. Sure. Um...

Let's talk about humor. You know, this is a comedy show. I grew up in a big family. No one ever said, I love you and my family, but you teased. You poked fun. And when I read and listened to your book, I loved the audio version as well. There's a lot of humor, and it just comes naturally for you. Is this something that is embedded in you from an early age as a kid? Is it something you've worked on? I think both my folks were really funny. And humor is a great way to...

I think relieve stress, diffuse a tough, tense situation if you can find a laugh. And my mother was kind of the queen of gallows humor. Even in the darkest days, she died of brain cancer. And even in the darkest days, she could find the light. She could make us laugh. And I think it's just such a powerful way to find common ground. That's why I love being on your show with you. I love that. Last thing.

You know, I told you that a couple weeks ago, my daughter, who's four, got pushed by another girl at camp and had a black eye, and I was really sad, and I was upset about it. And then I read your book, and I said, holy shit, my daughter is going to be the governor of Michigan. True Gretsch is available. Governor Gretchen Whitmer, we're going to take a break. We'll be right back after this. Thank you so, so much. Thank you.

When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Doan of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, a second look, wherever you get your podcasts.

That's our show for tonight. The Daily Show's Desi Lydic will be your host. Now, here it is, your moment of zen. I'm going to bring up a couple of these great business leaders, but before we do, I'd like to answer some questions from primarily local Philadelphia press. We've got to get out of here and go get a cheesesteak. We're going to go get a cheesesteak after this, right? We are in Philly.

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Welcome to the Cooper residence. Cooper McAllister. I'm surprised you put my name first. Come on in. From the brains behind the Big Bang Theory and Young Sheldon, CBS is excited to welcome back some beloved, familiar folks. I am so glad that you and Cece are here. And Georgie. Atta girl. It's a whole new chapter. Georgie and Mandy's first marriage premieres CBS Thursday, 8, 7 Central and streaming on Paramount+.

When 60 Minutes premiered in September 1968, there was nothing like it. This is 60 Minutes. It's a kind of a magazine for television. Very few have been given access to the treasures in our archives. You rolling? But that's all about to change. Like none of this stuff gets looked at. That's what's incredible. I'm Seth Doan of CBS News. Listen to 60 Minutes, A Second Look on Apple Podcasts.