Capitol Chaos, Turkey Conspiracies, and Brittany Howard’s Soundtrack for Life
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We've got so much to talk about tonight. The Capitol bathrooms become a war zone. Thanksgiving turkey is a lie. And Matt Gaetz finishes too soon. Let's get into the headlines.

Let's kick things off with some breaking news. If you've ever dreamed of being an attorney general, update your resume because they have an opening. Major breaking news. President-elect Donald Trump's pick for attorney general is out. Matt Gaetz says he is withdrawing his name from consideration. Trump himself has put out a statement. Matt has a wonderful future. I look forward to watching all of the great things that he will do.

Oh, you want to watch all the great things Matt Gaetz will do? Might I suggest downloading the Citizens app? But yes, this was a shocking announcement from the Trump team. And as you can say, no one was more surprised than Matt Gaetz. What a week Gaetz has had. He resigned from Congress. Everyone talked nonstop about how he's a sex criminal and a pedophile. And now he doesn't even get to be attorney general. This guy is f***ed.

so hard that he had to Venmo himself 10 grand. Proud of Capri Sun for one of the goats, but let's move on.

We've all heard the official story of the 2024 election. According to the pundits, the Democrats were obsessed with woke they-them politics that didn't connect with voters, while Republicans were talking about real issues that affect people day to day. So now, Republicans are in charge of both houses of Congress. So let's hear about the economy.

On Capitol Hill, Speaker of the House Mike Johnson took aim at Democrat Sarah McBride, the first trans member of Congress. He barred transgender people from using the Capitol complex bathrooms that do not align with the sex assigned at birth. Okay, forget about the economy. I guess the national mandate was making it harder for this one woman to poop at work. And by the way, who appointed Mike Johnson as the king of bathrooms? Under House rules, the Speaker has general control of facilities in the chamber.

I guess he's the king of bathrooms. Pardon me, your majesty. Government is weird sometimes. This guy is second in line for the presidency and he also has to refill the soap dispensers? So now, Sarah McBride, the first trans congresswoman, hasn't even started work yet and she already has to run around the corner to Starbucks to pee. And she is handling this situation more calmly than I would when I have to get to the bathroom.

the bathroom. Sarah McBride actually did respond in a statement. She said, I am not here to fight about bathrooms. I'm here to fight for Delawareans and to bring down cost-facing families. I've remained hard at work preparing to represent the greatest state in the union come January. Yeah, although did you just say that Delaware is the greatest state?

Have you tried any other state? I mean, you won. You don't need to keep saying that. But the point is, Sarah McBride is not the one pushing this issue. The whole thing started because of one congresswoman, Nancy Mace, the Republican from South Carolina, where things must be running so smoothly that she can devote all her energy to this. I'm going to fight like hell for women and girls to keep men out of women's private spaces, to include bathrooms, restrooms, locker rooms.

Changing rooms, you name it, you are not welcome. If being a feminist makes me an extremist or a bigot or a monster, I am totally here for it. I've said it before and I'll say it again, come at me, bro. Or bros, in this case. I don't love her bigotry there, but I do respect her dedication to getting her steps in. I listen to podcasts, but bullying your coworkers is also a choice. Honestly, transphobic Cruella DeVille's logic might...

Might backfire here because all of her drama, ironically, is affirming Sarah McBride's gender. There is nothing that defines the female experience more than starting a new job and a woman at work just decides she hates you. And Nancy Mace really seems to hate Sarah McBride. It's like it's her full-time job. In just 72 hours on X, Representative Nancy Mace has posted about trans women in bathrooms more than 325 times. What the f***?

225 tweets? Even use the bathroom when Mace is on the toilet tweeting all day. Oh my God. Jesus. I have never hated anything so much that I had to buy a new data plan. That is way too much tweeting. Even Elon Musk is like, have you considered joining Blue Sky?

She's not just posting on the internet, she's posting on the f***ing walls. South Carolina Congresswoman Nancy Mace hanging signs for biological women on restrooms. Ta-da! Your tax dollars paid for this!

But hey, she's getting a lot of attention for her bullshit politics. And even if it's pissing off a lot of people, you know who would not be happy with Nancy Mace right now? 2021 Nancy Mace. Back in 2021, she said, I strongly support LGBTQ rights and equality. No one should be discriminated against. I have friends and family that identify as LGBTQ, having been around gay, lesbian, and transgender people has informed my opinion over my lifetime. Hmm. Wonder what changed?

I guess the biggest transition was Nancy Mace wanting to identify as the center of attention. This is how you know that this is all performative. Well, first, the performance. Ta-da! And also, here's what she claims the problem is. I'm not going to stand for a man. You know, someone with a penis is in the women's locker room. That's not okay. I know how vulnerable women and girls are in private spaces.

Yes, of course. You just want to protect women from hypothetical predators. That would play a lot better if you weren't trying to get actual predators into the highest levels of government. Pete Hegzis, SK, Matt Gaetz. If Donald Trump nominated Bill Cosby, Nancy Mace would be walking in circles in an ugly 80s sweater eating a pudding cup. Bottom line, shit like this... Men are not allowed in women's spaces, period. Full stop. End of story.

would land a lot harder if you weren't rolling with the guy whose attitude about women's spaces is this. I'll go backstage before a show, and everyone's getting dressed and ready and everything else, and, you know, no men are anywhere. And I'm allowed to go in because I'm the owner of the pageant, and therefore I'm inspecting it. Yeah. Ta-da! When we find out the truth about Thanksgiving, so don't go away. Thank you.

See Gladiator 2 only in theaters. This film delivers thrilling action, a compelling story, emotionally charged performances, and spectacle on a scale unlike anything else. Only Ridley Scott could pull off a cinematic marvel at this scale. With sweeping storytelling and relentless action, Gladiator 2 stands out in the modern cinematic landscape with its immersive visuals, incredible score, and a gripping character-driven narrative.

with a beating emotional core.

You will be on the edge of your seat as you experience the unexpected twists and turns throughout the film. Get ready for an epic, immersive, visceral experience made for the big screen.

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Everything has become a conspiracy theory. Vaccines have microchips in them. Elections are stolen. Jay Leno is in debt to the mob. But those are just the obvious ones. Now there's a new show where they reveal the conspiracies we never even knew about. Check it out. Conspiracies. They're everywhere. Or are they nowhere? Or is that exactly what they want you to think? So that's where my wallet is. Well, for every they, there's a me.

I'm Kevin Matthew Kelp. Follow me as I pull back the curtain to find the truth behind the curtain. This is Project Conspiracy. Thanksgiving. It's a time to gather with friends and family and celebrate the birth of autumnal vegetables from a great horn vagina. But what if I told you this innocent fall festival that has no dark side whatsoever has a dark side?

Like most sheeple, I used to believe in the myth of Thanksgiving as a time of peace and harmony. But then I started to notice a curious pattern. God damn it, Kevin. If I hear one more friggin' conspiracy theory... It's not a conspiracy, Dad. The Earth is actually a triangle. Every year at Thanksgiving, I would try to inform my family about new and brilliant ideas. Redhounds do not make you bisexual, Kevin! Look, here...

What's wrong with you? Do some research. And every year, without fail, my entire family would act like I was the crazy one. The Chinese are not spreading propaganda. Maroon five songs. Maroon is the shade of red. And there's five stars on the Chinese flag. Do I have to spell it out for you? So what is it about this holiday that warps my family's minds and turns them against rational thought? It's time to give thanks for the truth. Gobble, gobble.

Thanksgiving is in every nook and cranny of our culture, but I had to start somewhere. As we all know, Thanksgiving was started by the Pilgrims, a shadowy cabal so devoted to suppressing good ideas, they literally forced people to put locks on their brains. In 1863, Thanksgiving was declared a national holiday by Abraham Lincoln, the king of making Americans fight each other. Honest Abe? More like...

Dishonest Abe. Of course the main event of Thanksgiving, the turkey. We don't eat turkey as a main course any other day of the year. It's dry, it's bland, and frankly, it's just plain fugly. Why is the government pushing turkey on us for this one day every year? Time to go to the source. Look at all this. They push this stuff hard. Huh. Buy one, get one. That is a good deal though.

Wow, that's a lot of turkey you got there. Eat all that, you're gonna OD on tryptophan. On what? Tryptophan, you know the weird chemical in turkey? You fool.

You've given the whole game away. Hey, you gotta pay for that! Money isn't real. Stupid bitch. Um, turkey, it's got the tryptophan. That knocks everybody out at some point. So what does tryptophan do to our bodies? Side effects of too much tryptophan may cause agitation and confusion. Oh, damn, tryptophan. It made perfect sense.

Drowsiness, agitation, and confusion. Turkeys turn our families against us with their mind-altering chemicals. Of course it was the turkey. And they're rewarded for their work with a presidential pardon. And granted unlimited access to the highest corridors of American power. This has gone on long enough. If I'm going to end this foul play, I'll have to execute a plan with all the trimmings.

This might look like a regular turkey, but don't let your eyes fool you. It's completely fake. And now we'll see if removing the mind-control turkey and serving them my untainted meat sets my family's minds free. Perfect. Let's eat. Testing. Here we go. Operation Gobbler begins now. Hey, glad you made it.

Listen, don't be weird this year, okay? What? Of course not. I even brought a normal turkey. Yeah, what do you mean normal? You're hilarious. Excuse me, Aunt Lisa. Got a normal turkey here, everybody. Who's loving this turkey, huh? Come on, everybody. Dig in. Speaking of digging, you know dinosaurs aren't real.

All those bones are a hoax to market the Jurassic Park franchise. God damn it, Kevin. You promised you wouldn't do this. This is just like when you said ancient aliens built Mount Rushmore. You don't believe me? Oh, have some turkey. What would you do to it? It smells like spray paint. What? No, it doesn't. Look. This is the best turkey I ever had. Are you okay? Me? I've never felt better in my life. You will be joining me on the show, so don't

See Gladiator 2. Only in theaters, this film delivers thrilling action, a compelling story, emotionally charged performances, and spectacle on a scale unlike anything else. Only Ridley Scott could pull off a cinematic marvel at this scale. With sweeping storytelling and relentless action, Gladiator 2 stands out in the modern cinematic landscape with its immersive visuals, incredible score, and a gripping character-driven narrative. The

The film stars an extraordinary cast, including Paul Mezcow, Pedro Pascal, with Denzel Washington and Connie Nielsen reprising her role as Lucilla. The fate of Rome rests on an uneasy alliance between Lucius and Macrinus, who need each other to further their ambitions. Gladiator 2 is a complex political chess game, action-packed revenge story with a beating emotional core. You will be on the edge of your seat as you experience the unexpected twists and turns throughout the film. Get ready for an epic adventure.

Immersive, visceral experience made for the big screen. See Gladiator 2 only in theaters. Don't miss it. The following ad is sponsored by Pets Best Insurance Services. Your pet is your bestie. Your therapist, your preferred match. It's easy to love them, even when they sneak your snacks. It's easy to protect them, too, with pet insurance coverage from Pets Best.

Because it's all fun and games until they chew on something they shouldn't. With perfect timing, Pets Best helps protect your furry friend and your budget from this imperfect world. Get up to 90% on eligible vet bills for less than a dollar a day. Find your perfect match at PetsBest.com. Pet insurance products offered and administered by Pets Best Insurance Services LLC are underwritten by American Pet Insurance Company or Independence American Insurance Company. For all terms, visit PetsBest.com backslash policy.

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of in-stock trucks, including the ultra-rugged new Tacoma and heavy-duty half-ton Tundra. You can experience the legacy of Toyota for yourself. Visit BuyAToyota.com, the official website for deals to find out more. Toyota, let's go places. Welcome back as a Grammy Award-winning artist whose latest album is called What Now? Please welcome Brittany Howell.

You're so cool. What's it like to be this cool? No one ever asked me that. Oh, my God. Am I cool? I mean, come on. Is she cool? Yes.

The epitome of cool. Thank you so much. Wow. Congratulations on your Grammy nomination. Thank you so much. Thank you. Yes. This is on your new album, What Now? Are you a fortune teller? How did you know we'd all be asking ourselves that question?

Listen, it was crazy when I wrote the album. And there's no stopping it. Yeah. You wrote the album out of not being able to tour, right? During lockdown? That's right. It was during the pandemic. And I had finished watching Tiger King. And it wasn't like the good part of the pandemic where you're like, oh, I might not have to go to work for like a month. You know, it was like...

I got into the dredges of it. We all know about it, you know? And started just having kind of like an existential crisis. Not a crisis, but more just like, well, I got nothing better to do with my time. Let me just, like...

figure out who I am real quick. And that's really where the album started. It was just some crazy times. We didn't know what was going to happen next. It's so inspiring because you take that lockdown and you're like, let me figure out who I am and write a Grammy-nominated album. And I was like, how many housewives are there?

I mean, that's what most people did. It's really remarkable. I'm not going to judge you for your use of time. Thank you. I appreciate that. We all found ways to get through it.

I really appreciate that. I think one of the things that sets you apart from so many artists is that you really are genre-defying. You talk about not really wanting to be boxed in by any particular type of music, and you have all these different influences, funk and R&B and soul and dance music, and exploring with all of these different vocal techniques, particularly in this new album. What was behind the creative inspiration for that?

I think the creative inspiration was really just who am I now and who do I want to be next? And really taking responsibility of

who I become, you know, and creatively it was just like, you know, what if I made something and it doesn't matter what anyone thinks about it and it doesn't matter what genre it lies in and it doesn't have to be necessarily like anything I've done before and I just pray, I just like play homage to all of these artists that have come before me and really connecting my emotions to music and every emotion is different and I think they all deserve their own soundtrack.

I heard that you've mentioned being influenced by a lot of different artists and you mentioned being very influenced by Prince and studying Prince and his techniques. Do you feel like musical ability is something that you can study and perfect or is it something that you're just sort of born with? You can absolutely perfect it. When I started, I was terrible. I doubt that. No, it's out there somewhere.

And I had a computer with all the songs on it from when I was like 13, 14, and it's gone now. Just took it out back, never to be seen again.

And I had to practice. I had to practice. I feel like the curiosity was there. I think that's the most important element of creativity is just being curious about, well, what if I did this? And what if I did that? And having that spark. And that's what keeps me going. You just never know what you can make and what it can mean to you in the moment or later. And especially, it's amazing what it means to other people and how it can connect you to each other. And I think that's why I just keep doing it.

I think it's so interesting that you say that. I think that transcends all types of not just art, but just experiences, curiosity, just the idea of being curious kind of keeps everything alive, right? Right. You have an interesting Prince story. You actually got to play with Prince. I did. I did. It was just a call out of the blue. So what had happened was we played Minneapolis, right?

And some of Prince's band was there. And they went back and they were like, "Yo, this band's great." So Prince calls my management, not him personally, you know, but somebody Prince-adjacent calls my manager and was like, "Hey, can they show up tomorrow to play Paisley Park?" And I remember my manager's face when they came in and they were like, "Eugh." They were like, "You know, do you think you could do a little detour on your tour and go to Paisley Park and play with Prince?" I was like, "Uh, duh." And so, yeah.

So, yeah, we show up, and Prince is there, and he's welcoming us into the studio. He's, like, super funny, super cool. He really does have a very low voice. And he was like, oh, I like this song you got. What key is it in? I want to hop up there and play with you. And I'm like, what?

I'm like, I forgot the key. I was like, I don't know. And we're playing the song, right? And everybody always has a story about how Prince can levitate or Prince can disappear. Prince can, you know, all kinds of crazy stuff. Like he's a ghost, an apparition. And I found it to be true.

Did he disappear? What happened was, I'm up there playing the solo, and I'm like, this is about time where Prince is gonna come out, right? And so we're just, he's not showing up, and we're just, like, playing the same things over and over again. And I'm hoping he's gonna show up. And then out of nowhere, he just pops on stage. And I'm like, okay, maybe I didn't see him get up here, you know? He shreds this solo. It was so sick. We start double soloing. In my mind, I'm just like, I can't believe it, you know? This is the greatest story of my life. And we finish playing a song, and he kisses me on the cheek.

and then he just jumps in the air and vanishes. Gone. Yeah. And I'm not the only one with that story. That is, I mean, what an experience. To have that, you will always be able to look back on it. The time that you played with Prince and he just vanished into thin air. Yeah. So I can confirm it. I'm one of those people who saw him vanish

- Yeah. - The song "To Be Still," which is about a flower being taken care of in someone's garden, is this about someone in particular, or is this just about the idea of being taken care of?

You know, I'm a Libra. I love love. It's my favorite thing on this planet. And it's just a very good thing. And I think love can grow if someone waters it. And so this song was just my imagining of what if I could quit looking for love and I could stay in one spot and I could blossom and I could put down roots and I could be the

the greatest thing that I was always meant to be. And it was support of something else, you know? And I just wanted to write a song like that, and it just came to me. And to me, it's just my peaceful place, this song. Well, we're so grateful for being here, but you have to perform. So What Now? is available everywhere. ♪♪

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Toyota has been building a legacy of excellence for years. From developing hybrid technology to upping the standards of safety and efficiency, Toyota is always innovating, always making progress. And with a superior lineup of in-stock SUVs, including the Adventure Ready RAV4 and capable, affordable Corolla Cross, you can experience the legacy of Toyota for yourself. Visit buyatoyota.com, the official website for deals, to find out more. Toyota, let's go places.

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