The Reigate Squire - Part Two
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Previously on Sherlock and Co. Hello there. Hi, Colin Hayter. That's Captain Colin Hayter. One man fighting force, eh? Well, once upon a time, yeah. We get a call, don't we, from Acton's big art dealership owned by Peter Acton. He gets robbed. Seconds f***ing later, there's another one. Another call? Yep, another robbery.

Cunninghams gets robbed, Lodges gets robbed, and Kirwan's gets robbed. All in the same night? This is all over a weekend, from Friday to Sunday night. A little curious, is it not? Just you waiting to what happened last night. Alarm goes off for Cunninghams. Police swarm to the scene.

William Kirwan, one of the big-time art dealers, one of the ones that got robbed the night before, is found crushed by the f***ing security door. Yes, so this is William Kirwan, owner of Kirwan Collection Limited, a private corporation used as a trading vehicle for his art collection. He went in, took what he wanted, put them in his van and moved on to the next place. He? He. Right there. William Kirwan, the...

He was robbed as well. And that is exactly what he wants us all to think. You believe he staged a robbery at his own collection as a ruse? I do, yeah. Include himself in the spree and no one's the wiser. He is gripping something. I'm so sorry, Inspector. His fists are clenched shut, Sherlock. There we go. A note. Handwritten but torn. What does it say? I am your son at 12.15...

Were you close? Well, everyone is close in this game. His head had gone a bit. If that's a fair thing to say. Did you visit him?

In the hospital? We did indeed, yes. Mr Holmes actually managed to find, in Kirwan's possession, something quite intimate. Sherlock? Whoa, Sherlock, are you okay? Excuse me, I... Sherlock? Sorry, he's not been very well recently, a bit... Whoa, jeez! I may have... Whoa, whoa, Sherlock! Oh my God, Sherlock! Sherlock, hey, hey! Shall I call an ambulance? Hey, Sherlock! Shall I call an ambulance? Oh, it's recording. Oh...

Usually set, usually has a little time code. Well, OK. Hello. This is the Reigate Squire part two. Some swearing, nothing else that will disgust or terrify you in any way. So, yeah, have a wonderful time. If you want to give this episode a read, transcripts are available at sherlockandco.co.uk. OK, bye now.

No, really, please don't fuss. I'm not fussing, I'm lecturing. OK. Please don't lecture then. Go home. No. Sherlock!

You passed out? Do you even remember doing it? Must be all these dazzling artworks, Mr Cunningham. Truly captivating. Yes, thanks. Though I think you should probably go and at least see a doctor. I can see one right there. Yeah, very good, mate. Okay, come on, we're heading back. No, no, lots to be getting on with. William Kirwan must be prosecuted in full for everything.

Isn't that right, Mr Cunningham? Yes, absolutely. Sherlock, please, just stay put for a sec. Inspector Forrester, I assure you, Watson here is one of the most capable medical practitioners London can offer. I am in safe hands. Yeah, you're delirious. I'm calling an ambulance. Hello! Hello!

It is a bloody big room. Sherlock, your turn. I'd rather work, thank you. Yeah, well, you know, I'd rather you went home and stopped collapsing. But here we are. Fine. Hello. Ah, rubbish. Are you really feeling that weak? No, I'm trying to concentrate. On this art collection. Cunningham's Gallery is the front office, as it were, for his collection. When you go into the back and down some stairs, you get this sort of...

A warehouse, I suppose. This is in Kings Cross, so you've got these amazing buildings at the back that used to build railway carriages, now full from floor to ceiling with racks and racks of artwork. Guys, it's amazing to think that, I don't know, just the value of one of these 20-foot shelving units, well, not the shelving units, the artworks on them,

It must be a million, two million, three million. Who knows? Who knows? Anyway, you can see the sort of industrial hatch at the back that would have buzzed the courier in. That was, of course, William Kirwan in disguise. Then the police have marked out with red tape the sort of missing pieces, really. Everything is packaged, not on display. There's just pockets of things missing. You know, erm...

Like, imagine a library with little vacant slots where books once were. Then a red... Well, let me just read this one for you. The Spire by Amos Haustrom, 1921. That was, of course, taken. It then has a grading of its significance. And, well, actually, that one's very valuable. But like we said throughout, the stolen works aren't the most valuable pieces. This is a completely...

I don't know, random burglary, essentially. Random is a very powerful word, Doctor. I would use it with the utmost caution. This one here that was taken, significant value. Yeah, but the other burglaries were still smash and grab. Well, not smash, but a grab of random works. Yes, yes.

A spree. A spree indeed. Are we looking for something in particular, Sherlock? I mean, William did get caught. He may wake up any time and the police will no doubt get a confession. Why come back to Rob again when the whole community is on such high alert? Why do it at all in the first place? The bridge. Another high-value piece. Why do it? Greed? Envy?

Same reason these things always happen. Yes, well, he managed 30 years of collecting before any wrongdoing before. Er, that's not true. It's not? Alex says that he, William Kirwan, would purchase on the black market. When did he say this? When you were recovering from your collapse. Oh, for goodness sake. I was just in the toilet pretending to recover. What did he say?

Exactly. Sorry, what? I didn't collapse. Yes, you did. I mean, yes, I collapsed, but I chose to collapse. Yeah, and I chose to stab my toe on the kitchen table this morning, mate. I had to distract attention away from what was happening at the time. Uh-huh. And what was happening at

At the time. Inspector Forrester was about to reveal to Alec Cunningham that we had discovered the torn note in the clenched fist of William Kirwan at the hospital. The I am your son at 1215 H note. Indeed. What would be wrong with that? Exactly. Look, this is what Cunningham signed for us. The written authorization I requested. I authorized Dr. Watson and Sherlock... Yeah, what's... You asked him to do this? Seen it yet. The son...

The sun on what? Oh, it's the same. Huh, it's the same as the note. The slanted O, the uneven scrawl of the S that tilts in a clockwise direction, and the tail on the N. Well, he has got bad handwriting. And in this deficiency, he has exposed himself. So he wrote the note? I believe so. Not just the S-O-N, but the H there, unauthorized. The date...

Look at the 1 and 2 of 12. You see this smudging here? It's because he used my pen. I tasted the ink on the note. Oh, don't remind me. And it was Jetstream ink. That's ultra-fast drying. Which means he writes with a cross-thumb grasp, not a tripod grasp. So he smudges. He smudges his handwriting. Exactly. And he knows he does. So he uses pens with a Jetstream ink. A very, very fast drying ink.

When he used my pen as standard biro, it smudged. Hold up. What? Watson, I assure you that my analysis is accurate. Sometimes cases aren't what they seem, and William Kirwan may well be innocent yet. Give me time. What are you doing, John? Oh, that's dusty. Get back! It's not evidence I can touch it, but it should be evidence. Why? Because, look. Artwork by Courtney Leonhardt.

1893. The Reigate Squire. But let's think about this. Why would Cunningham lure William Kirwan back to his gallery? And how can the Reigate Squire be stolen from Peter Acton, one of the other collectors, and victims of the spree, but also appear at Cunningham's? Why are you still on the swing? The children waiting. It's helping me think.

I'm just trying to work out if this is you being you or you showing signs of exhaustion and delirium. Oh, this is very much me being me. Yeah, yeah, I'm inclined to agree with you. We need something of the police. Yeah, we need them to remove you from a children's playground when there's a queue to go on the swing. They must not, under any circumstances, allude to Alec Cunningham that we have seen the portion of his notes to William Kirwan. I message them. Thank you, Mrs Hudson.

Hey, whoa, hey, hey, hey, hey. It'll be your go in a minute. I promise, OK? It absolutely will not. I'm not done thinking. Sherlock. My mind is spluttering, Watson. I need the motion to sway it into life, to give my thoughts the rhythm they require, to accelerate through the barriers of confusion, of lassitude. God, I'm really getting some air now.

The next thing... Yep? The coat. What coat? In Captain Hanson's picture. Captain Hater, I see what you're doing. Cunningham was wearing a coat. Uh-huh. He lives above the gallery. So why was he wearing a coat? Exactly. Perhaps it was because he had been outside.

He faked forced entry of his own gallery. Because William Kirwan was found with no tools to ram the door. It's clear, isn't it?

Cunningham stole the Reigate Squire. How so? Because, I don't know, Sherlock, because it was registered to Peter Acton, it then disappeared, and we just found it at Cunningham's. We found the Reigate Squire, yes. But what did we also find? I don't know. Just come off the swing and tell me. Dust. Dust.

Lots and lots of dust. So? So, it's been there for a while. How has it been there for a while if it was stolen last week? Because, Mrs Hudson, somebody owns the real one and somebody else a fake.

And off he goes. Right, your turn now. Sorry about that, guys. Ow! Ow! She pinched me. Excuse me, I didn't steal the swing. He did. Hello there. It's another art gallery. Some much older but really amazing pieces in here. I am sorry it's a podcast and you can't see them, obviously, but they are...

I mean, it almost feels museum-like, you know? It kind of makes you want to lower your voice in reverence, actually. Peter Acton. Hello there. Thank you for coming by. Thank you for having us. I'm so sorry. I have to make a request that you don't record this. Oh. Can I ask why, Peter? Because it's very significant. It's potentially... It's damaging, reputation-wise, for JP...

And he's too dear to my heart. To J.P. Cunningham? Who's J.P. Cunningham? Alex's father. Owner of the Cunningham Collection. Course, right. Please. I do wish to share as much information as I can, but I simply cannot have it recorded. Right. Could we maybe leave the microphone in here? Yeah, sure, sure. I'll just actually pop to the lube before we... Look, I know, I know, I'm recording. Yeah, this is off my phone.

But, you know, you're either with me in these adventures or you're not, and you're just going to read about it, or I'm going to explain it to you, and it's not going to have the same effect. So don't even begin your judgmental accusations. I mean, you knew what you were on board with many, many adventures ago. So, yeah, you know, spare me the holier-than-thou, high and mighty bollocks. Let's go and betray this old man's trust together. Good stuff. Lovely. Okie dokie.

Oh, goodness me, I feel like I'm wearing a wire. Right, OK, you're going in my trouser pocket, by the way, don't mind the pocket fluff and the receipt from Greg's. All right, in you go. Oh, gosh, sorry about that, Peter. We've been bouncing over all sorts of places, so haven't had the chance to track down a toilet, you know. No problem at all. If you want to come through here, we can talk in private. Yep, just...

Just through here? Yes, down the steps. Here we go. You have concerns over Alec? Um, I do, yes. Let's just take a seat in here. He's expanding, you see. The Cunningham Collection. It's all these new pieces. Lots of speculation. I always thought it was a sort of Covid, post-Covid, silly boom, really. But he didn't stop.

We began to have our concerns in the field as it were when I had a contact in Italy. He was a collector of Cournet Leonard, a very astute painter. Anglo-Dutch. Did rather well in his lifetime. Exceptionally well after it. Terribly hard to find ones in good nick post-war though. Anyway, this dealer reached out to me and I headed over to Turin. And he showed me his... his collection.

And there I saw it. The Reigate Squire? Yes. How did you know that? We saw one in storage at Cunningham's. Yes, because he supposedly bought it four years ago. It's a fake. It is. And it was only in being face to face with the real one that it occurred to me. It's the signature of Leonard. Let me show you. This is the scan of my one. The original that was taken.

And this is the one Cunningham supposes is in his collection. The handwriting doesn't quite match, but... The dot. Leonard finished his D at the end of his name with a little flourish. A blot of ink to any uneducated observer. But it was seen as a full stop by Leonard. As if to punctuate. This work is finished. Complete. And the writing is not the same on Cunningham's. No, it's not.

But this is what I find distressing, Mr. Holmes. What's that? I sent a letter to him, to J.P. I thought that handwritten post would be more personal. But also maybe Alec would ignore it. It was not long after that that the spree began. The Reigate Squire that I owned was taken. And he took other paintings as a decoy? Yes. If he had just taken the Reigate Squire, the suspicions would be out there in the open for everyone.

Then... The spree. Yes, the spree. A spree that was blamed on poor William Kirwan. But he's... he's a rather nervous type, is William. I'm afraid I don't quite have the imagination to envisage such ruthlessness in him. Well, his character reference hasn't been flawless, but I'm inclined to agree. Why do you say that? The police believe he purchased items from the black market.

Stolen items. Can we verify that? I certainly know somebody who can. Who? Wiggins. Sherlock, pal. Did you get my message? I sure did. Hey, Johnny boy, how you doing? Good, mate, good. Hope you're well. This is Mariana. Nice to meet you, Mariana. I heard lovely things. Oh, thank you.

From who? From Sherlock. Aw, Sherlock. Can we get on with the matter at hand, please? Are you eating a fry-up? Yeah, I'm hungry. It's nine o'clock at night. What's wrong with eating a fry-up at night? Well, not wrong, just... You eat cereal at night. That's different. How is it different? I said, can we get on with the matter at hand, please? Before I collapse. This time due to boredom. Oh, sure, you collapsed. On purpose. Well, yes, on purpose, but he is ill. I'm not ill. You're tired. We're all tired, pal.

Suck it up. I am sucking it up. Can we please? Alright, man. Jesus. So yeah, the guy buys up stolen pieces. This is William Carwen, correct? That's right. The items, the goods, they come into the circuit in totally anonymous ways, right? They use these coats. First thing my boys notice is the guy's watch, right? Here's a picture of Coma Boy last year. You see that? That watch is called a Royal Oak.

There's eight of them in the world. Eight. Three in Japan, five in America, one in the UK. That's nine. There's nine of them in the world. Colonel Gaddafi owned the one in the UK, no less. Left it in a residence he owned on Fitzjohn's Avenue. He gets his head chopped off or whatever. A few years later, some local gang raids the house. They get the watch. It goes in the black market.

And William Kerwin here picks it up. Don't know how much for, like, but it proves the point. He knows how these things work and who to speak to. So he's shady? Shady, yes. But a burglar? No. And here? This is the kind of sight he'd use. It's not quite dark web stuff, they ain't that savvy, but look. This sight looks like some second-hand car boot sale type shite, right? Look at this.

The usernames they use would be the artist or sometimes the collection or some indicator of the real piece. You know as the buyer it's that and not what's pictured, which is some lawnmower or whatever. And that price tag, it says 150 quid but you know it's 150 grand, you get me? It's all about the full context. I get you, but we haven't seen any of the art pieces on the site, have we? Well, probably because every art dealer in the area is freaking out.

So the pieces are too hot, right? If they get on the market, can we find out who put them on there? Because if that goes back to Cunningham... That doesn't matter. It would prove he stole them. We know he stole them, and we know why. To sell? That wasn't the primary motive. Only one. One of the stolen pieces was listed on the black market, and it sold to our coma boy. Which one? That one. Annie Morrison. I'm sorry, is that the artist or the painting? The painting. The painting.

Watson, call Captain Colin Hayter. Tell him to contact Alec Cunningham and bring him to meet us. Somewhere on the Thames. Hmm. Why on the Thames? Tate Modern. Meet us outside the Tate Modern. I... really... do we have to see Colin again? He's his insurance agent. Cunningham, unlike the other targets, had only valuable works taken. Any news about a potential payout will be welcome to him. Even at this hour.

It's really getting chilly now. Yes. I thought you army guys were punctual. Where is Captain Hanson? Oh, would you stop saying that? Because then I'll laugh and he'll ask why I'm laughing and then that'll be awkward. And we are a punctual bunch, but to be fair, he's got to entice Alec all the way out here. Well, if he sells half as good as he thinks he does, he should be of use to us.

Is this a bit of ironic dressing you've added to the adventure, Sherlock? Hm? The Tate Modern. What about it? It's a massive art gallery, mate. Oh. No. This isn't for that. Oh, well what's it for then? Why am I shivering my bollocks off by the Thames? Well, the temperature of your bollocks are not my concern. It is Alec Cunningham's bollocks that I am interested in. Well, you heard it here first, folks.

Sherlock? Yes, Mrs Hudson. I'm confused. This is what he does. This is how he does things. It's exhausting. Never mind him collapsing from exhaustion. How I'm still standing is the real question. And here comes our captain. Oh, hello, hello. Stop it. Cole! Colin! Hi, mate. You all right? Mariana, this is Colin Hans... Get your words out, John. Colin Hater. Captain Colin Hater. This is Mariana. Hi. Hi. Hi. Good to meet you.

Right, I've got Mr Cunningham with me. Now I'm hoping it's good news for both of us. Absolutely. Hello again. Yeah, we wouldn't drag you out here for bad news.

Would we, Sherlock? Ooh, I don't know about that. Ha! He's joking. How are you guys keeping? All good, I hope? Yeah, man, yeah. You, er, grinding? You hustling? Hustling and grinding, yeah. Right, Mariana? Mm-hm, yeah. Yeah. Colin, we may need some of your muscle. I expect Alec here will lash out with just about everything he's got. And I have been suffering a little lately with fatigue, you see. Sorry, I...

I don't follow. No, and neither did we at first. Ah, Inspector. Thank you ever so much. Just in time. Take it away. Alec Cunningham, I am arresting you under suspicion of commercial burglary, larceny, insurance fraud... What? ...perverting the course of justice, and the attempted murder of William Kerwin. What? You do not have to say anything, but anything you do say may be used against you in a court of law. Get off! Get...

Is this some sort of joke? What is wrong with you? Alec, just calm down and cooperate. What's this? Is this actually happening? What is this? Is this fake? Please, tell me this is fake. Fake? No. No. This is real. Unlike your rival squire. The reason this whole dirty business began. Forrester, get off me.

Call my dad. Call my dad right now. Nobody needs to call their dad, Alec. We're not in the playground. No, we're not, Mrs Hudson. We are, however, playing out in the cold. I did choose a particularly windy spot in the hope you'd wear that coat. And if you don't mind, I'm just going to have a little old rummage in here. Get off. Get off me. No. Aha.

The rest of your lovely note to William Kirwan. No! Yes, I'm afraid, Alec. You responded to the very polite, somewhat too polite, I must say, accusation from Peter Acton that you had acquired a number of counterfeit artworks. One of which, of course, was the Reigate Squire. Difficult to combat that accusation when he has the real one and you don't. Well...

There's a way to resolve that. Remove it from his possession. Ah, but that would incriminate you somewhat, wouldn't it? That single point of connection needed to be fragmented, to be randomized and muddled. How about you don't just steal the Reigate's squire, you steal seven or eight other pieces he owned.

And don't stop there. Why not rob lodges and Kirwins and, hey, to really cover your tracks, you could stage a robbery against your own collection. Suddenly that single targeted shot is lost in a messy frag. An array of shrapnel flying through the air, concealing that single piece that struck its target. Apologies if I'm stirring any unfortunate memories, Captain. No, yeah, carry on. But, and here is where you let yourself down, you became greedy.

Your missing pieces happened to be some of the most valuable you own, so you could defraud our handsome friend here. What? Is that me? There was a problem, of course. Peter Acton wouldn't stop. Even though his original Reigate Squire was gone, he was insistent to have you exposed, to have your father back at the helm of the collection. How to throw him and the others off your scent with a trap?

You smuggled the stolen Annie Morrison onto the black market, knowing William Kirwan would be unable to resist it. He bought it, and you slipped this note through his door. To us, it just read: "I am your son at 12:15 h." But we see, when we place it together with the rest of the note, that I see is watermarked with the Cunningham's Gallery logo and the same purple tones on your branding.

In its full context, all is revealed. It is not "I am." It is in fact the end of a name. William, it's over. You're screwed. I know about Morrison. My place at 12:15. Bring cash.

It's just a note and... That could have been anybody. No. Even to the unversed in handwriting analysis, it's patently you. But hey, maybe you're right. Let's leave it to the experts that Inspector Forrester has at her disposal to decide. Just... just get off me a sec!

Listen. We're listening. As are thousands of other people, mate, if you've got a good explanation for them. This... I... Right, right, listen. We can make this go away. Can't we? I've... I'm liquid. All right, I've got cash. Lots of cash. That's all I'm saying.

Oh, Alec. Inspector Forrester, you may want to add attempting to bribe an officer to that perverting the course of justice charge. Oh, we will, Mr Holmes. Get up. Please, please. Kerwin broke in. Stop, stop. Stop, Inspector, please. How are you feeling now? Invigorated, Watson. Good for you. Thank you. You see, the cure to being overworked

is to work even more. No, that's not the... The lesson we've learned is that... Handwriting is important? No, that's not the lesson. Art lovers are weird? No, no, that's not... The lesson... The lesson is to f***ing keep grinding and get results. Well, I don't know about that. To f***ing live and breathe your business and deliver. Guys, we've got to talk about growing this mother f***er. We can franchise the f*** out

out of your detective operation and make it national. International. The key is selling. Colin. In this bar right now I'm buying you all a drink and we're going to brain this thing until we can roll out a plan for serious growth. Grab a table I'll get the shots in.

This isn't the lesson we've learned, is it? Please don't let the commercial growth be the lesson, John. Yeah, no, I... The lesson actually... The lesson is, sometimes in life, it's better to run. Run now. Run. Run. Go, go, go! Oh, my God. Ladies and gentlemen, I've been John Watson. We've been the adventure of the Reigate Squire. You've been amazing. What a gig. I love this crowd.

I don't really know what else live bands say. I haven't been to a show in a while. But yeah, that's you sorted. Archie, what lesson have we learned along the way? Yeah, couldn't agree more. See you all next week.