Ep 103: Fortune Feimster
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He's an animal. Did you do any shows with him? You did Bert. I did some Bert. Fully loaded. There's the sweater. Yeah. That's right. He just asked us to do the cruise and we got to make a decision. Yeah. Cruise, really? Our health can handle a cruise with Bert Kreischer. It's only four days, but it's, you know, Bert four days. Wow. I didn't know he was doing a cruise. Oh, yeah. He's an animal. We just did Red Rocks again. Like, he just doesn't stop. Yeah, he doesn't stop. Do you ever, do you stop? You're like, I need a, are you not going to tour until you have a full...

No, I got to come up with stuff by the end of January. Yeah. Oh, boy. Yeah. It's tough. But I took five months. I did an acting gig in Toronto. Yeah, it's with The Rock, right? Arnold Schwarzenegger. Whoa. Arnold Schwarzenegger? The White Rock. Yeah.

Yeah. Was he cool? He was awesome. He seems cool. He's really cool, yeah. Legend. Yeah, yeah. And he's still pretty. He was pre-rock. He was original rock. Yeah, exactly. Years ago, she said that she was his trainer, lied to him just to talk to him. Oh, hilarious. He's like, are you my partner? And she's like, yeah, it's me. She's like this 5'5". He's like, okay, let's go. He asks every woman if they're his partner. That's his move. Are you my partner? Yeah.

So you just bought an umbrella. I mean, this is not, we all have curly hair. This is not curly hair weather raining outside. Because of the rain. Yeah. Yeah. Brutal. Yeah, I just, I never buy it. That's like my thing. I never buy an umbrella. Me neither. I can't do it. You're a true New Yorker. I just, I do this. I do one of those. There you go. I don't want to look like a poodle. Yeah.

Do you like coming to New York? Wait, are we on? Oh, yeah. Oh, is this on? Is this thing on? Let's introduce Fortune. Her new Netflix special is streaming now. Good Fortune on Netflix. Fortune Feimster. Hey. Thanks for joining us. Good to have you. Are we drunk yet? We're working on it. This is our whiskey bodega cat we told you about. Jamie, what's up, girl? Oh, yeah. Y'all got your own whiskey set. Oh, yeah. You better believe it, sister. And you're a whiskey drinker. I love whiskey. Whiskey, bourbon, because I'm from the South. That's what we do. Yeah.

It'll rise again. Oh my God. Joking, I'm joking. You stop. This is sober, Mark. I know, right? That'd be a good blue chew tagline. It'll rise again. Okay, blue chew is an erection pill. Oh, is it? What's it mean?

You should have delivered that one to me. I'm not familiar with erection pills. I'm the one who's having problems. Yeah, this is... We're doing... Jamie, tell us what we're doing. Because we've never done this. And our partner, Chris Hart, our whiskey partner... Yes. Yes.

has given us a lot of shit for never drinking one of these his favorite cocktail is a whiskey sour this is a spin on that yeah it's the new york sour so what the difference is is that it has a float of dry red wine on top i've heard about the sweet and the dry we're classy i love it putting some red wine in that all right i've never tried this i'm nervous this is exciting not great red wine on whiskey

It's worth it. It's supposed to be good. I'll try it. Don't knock it until you try it. I'm trying, but it sounds like something a real alcoholic would do. Put these two together. That's how most good drinks were created. That's true. You ran out of ingredients and you just threw it in. You gotta just figure it out. And that's your whiskey. What's it called?

Bodega Cat Whiskey. At bodegacatwhiskey.com, folks. Is it flying off the shelf? It's flying. All right, guys. Killing it. Y'all are entrepreneurs. Oh, yeah. Oh, there it is. There it is. Bodega Cat Straight Rye. We gotta get some reviews, though. People are gonna start reviewing. Oh, yeah. I like a review, Matt. I like my rye gay. Is old-fashioned your favorite cocktail? Yeah, old-fashioned is probably my drinking choice. Nice. But I like a whiskey sour as well.

Yes, you might be our first lesbian. Yeah? I think on the show. No. Really? Who else? Really? Mark's like, uh, uh. Damn, you may be right. First lesbian. As a gay. All right. You know, it's like. How do you guys feel? I feel good. All right. Good. Good to have you. I feel good, too. Your other special is Sweet and Salty on Netflix. Yeah. And you did the half hour. Yep.

And this is the first one since Sweet and Salty. Yeah. Sweet and Salty came out January of 2020. Yeah. Not much else happened that year. Yeah. That's a good time to have a special come out. Yeah. Well, at the time, it felt like such a bummer. I was like, oh, I can't go tour. But then everyone was at home. Right. So it was nice because not nice being home because of the pandemic, but more people watched it, I think, because they were just chilling at home. Totally. And you went to the Capitol. Yeah.

Oh my God. I almost went, yeah. You slide those in there. Effortlessly that I was almost like, yeah, I did. Wait, what? That's a good gig. Who books that? So yeah, this is the follow up to Sweet and Salty. Nice. No fortune cookie.

That's what I thought you were going to go with, fortune cookie. I went with good fortune. That's better. I couldn't think of a name. And I was like, well, I got this. It's hard. It's a lot of pressure. Because you want the pun kind of, right? I always kind of want the pun in there, too. Yeah, I kept tossing around. We would send possible titles. And they were like, no. So, you know, because Netflix has to agree, too. Do they really? Yeah, they have to. I didn't know that. Or at least where I'm at, they have to. They like to sign off. I mean, if I really love something, I think I could...

Oh, thank you. I think if I really love something, you know. Thank you, Jamie. We could make it work. Yeah, yeah. Oh, thank you, JMO. Cheers. Cheers, Dad. Hey, hey, mazel. All right. Mmm. Mmm. It tastes like a whiskey sangria. Yeah. Yeah. Kind of. It's kind of nice. Kind of nice. Very good. Yeah, that red wine is what cuts it because it's like there's a sweetness in there from the simple syrup and obviously you got the sour and then that's like.

I like that. Yeah, you can use like a Zim, but it's better to use dry wine. It takes a second, but it's growing on me. Yeah? Yeah. I think I got too much red wine. Me too. I got a lot of red wine in here. You want more of that straight whiskey? Well, you know, sometimes there's egg white used. Oh. Oh.

It cuts some of the red wine a little bit. I do like the multicolor. Okay. But during a podcast, we're not doing egg whites here. Yeah. I see. Well, no, it's very good. It is red wine forward. Well, we could switch the next round. Maybe we could do something else. All right. Oh, I don't think Sam likes it. I mean, it's good, but it's not my favorite whiskey. We have all these ingredients here. Yeah. Right. It's good. Well, now Christopher Hart's going to kill himself. Yeah.

Sorry, Chris. Yeah, yeah. That means we're partners on Bodega Cat. Do you guys drink different things that people recommend? We'll take recommendations. Yeah. We love Rex. We're open-minded. I haven't had this before, so why not? Yeah, I know. I'm happy we're having it. I had an old-fashioned before the show. Yeah, that's a good drink. Yeah. He also just a regular. I would not have the...

New York style. A regular whiskey sour? Yeah. Oh. That's just not without the wine. I can do that. Just without the wine next time. All right. Oh, well, we'll get those ready to go because this is going down. This might be too delicate of a drink for you two strong strapping guys. Yeah, this is a little dainty. I've never been called stronger strapping in my life, so I'll take it. I'm going to strap on. This sweatshirt's fooling people. Ha, ha, ha.

Ironically, a Bert Kreischer sweatshirt is making me look better. Bertie boy. Yeah. Yeah. You look fit. Really? Yeah. I'll take it. You do. I'll take it, man. It's a fitted hoodie. It is. It helps. I'm at the H&M one. If the clothes, if they just fit well, I don't need anything nice. I just want the fit. Same. Same. I got short arms, too. So I have a weird body. So I have to get everything tailored. You do. I never.

noticed your arms they don't look sure but when you put a new jacket on it yeah it's flopping off the end like a magnum yeah you know so why are you delivering all your dick jokes to her you give them to me i'm the dick here he really wants me to get on board with these dick jokes are you a gold star gay i'm a gold star what is gold star gaming that means i've never slept with a dude wow nice

This guy. Yeah, that's a gold star lesbian. They've never had the wiener. Why is it called gold star? I don't know. Because you're a soldier in the army. I don't know. You're pure. That's why. Was there ever a moment where you were attracted to men or not at all? Oh.

I find men attractive for sure, but I've just never had that like vibe, you know? I think because I'm around guys a lot with comedy. I have two older brothers, so we immediately, everyone has that kind of bro vibe, like high five thing. Yeah. That we just never, it was never that...

I like that you're literally on a drinking podcast. We're the reason she doesn't like men. Guys like us. That makes sense. No, but it's not like I'm not one of those lesbians that's like, ugh, guys, gross. I like guys a lot. But they're not thinking of me that way and I'm not thinking of them that way. But I do find men attractive for sure. Really?

Wow. But the dick is, that's where the rubber meets the road. Yeah. Because then you're like, ah, I got to play with that thing. I don't want any part of that. The vagina is objectively better looking than the penis, I think. Yeah. Yeah, I think so. For sure. It just is. My friend growing up was like, I might be gay. And we're like, oh, all right, whatever, you know, go nuts. And then. Literally. And then he said he kissed a guy. And right when he felt the stubble, he was like, I'm not gay.

Oh, interesting. And that's what got him. He's like, it was just a... I commend him for trying, though. Yeah, sure. We were all behind him. I mean, not literally, but... Last week, we were practicing this. Giving him a thumbs up. We had a sex teacher come in who teaches cunnilingus. We did a bachelor party episode for Mark last week. And a woman taught us cunnilingus on melons. And Joe DeRosa was watching Mark and I lick the melons. And he said, you know, the stubble, it turns me on a little bit. Oh, wow. It was a weird moment.

That was weird. I forgot about that. Did you guys learn anything? We learned Joe's gay. Jeez, I forgot all about that. I think I blocked that out. Yikes. I learned that that melon was wet as hell when I was done with it. That's how you know women are nicer than men. I know girls who have taken blowjob classes.

Oh, yeah. But you don't know, do you know any guy who's taken a... We didn't know it existed. I kind of was thrown at Peter as our producer here. I was like, what are good bachelor party activities? Yeah. And that was one of them. Yeah. I think it's great that you guys wanted to learn some skills. Yeah. I'm clueless down there.

Yeah. You could teach a master class, I'm sure. I'd like to think I could. Really? Maybe. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you have the equipment. You have more experience with it, you know? So I've heard that sucking the clit is the move. Oh. Isn't that what she said? Or no? Maybe she did say that, but that's what Nikki Graves always told me. We should not have. We should...

We should not have had an instructor come on while we were getting blackout drunk. That's true. That did not stick, any of that stuff. I love the melon. Yeah. I guess, yeah, that's maybe the closest thing. Well, you slice it in half. It is a valley in there. Now every time you do that, you're like, it doesn't taste like melon. It's so confusing. Oh, no, it does not. And I hate cantaloupe. Yeah. So that was tough for me. I was licking it.

I'd rather lick a stranger's vagina than a cantaloupe. Ugh, I hate cantaloupe. Sometimes licking a stranger's vagina can be very nice. That's true. I think cantaloupe, least favorite fruit than honeydew. Yeah. What about you? What's the difference between cantaloupe? Wait. Cantaloupe's the orange one. Honeydew's for you. Oh, yeah. You don't like cantaloupe, but that's what you're doing it on. I hate it. The texture or the... I don't like the taste. Yeah.

Honeydew is good. You get a soft honeydew. That could be a fucking... That's a good melon. There they are right there. It's a waste of a melon. Wait till you're old. You'll like it for some reason. Oh, really? It just seems like an elderly food. That's true. There's that vagina. You're pregnant. What are your cravings right now? Fruit. Definitely fruit. Oh, you're pregnant? Hey, Grant. It's okay. She's drinking with us. She's not keeping it. Who's the father?

Who's the father? I think DeStefano. He just finds his way to Puerto Rican women. I didn't even sleep with him. I just gave him a hug. DeStefano started a third podcast. Yeah, he did? Now to pay for it. But the honeydew, to me, honeydew has no flavor. It's like if I get a fruit salad and it's cantaloupe and honeydew, I'm furious. Yeah, honeydew doesn't have a lot of flavor. What are your road snacks?

I mean, if it were up to me, it'd be all fatty stuff, you know, like Doritos and Snickers. But my wife has laid the hammer down. It's more like carrots and hummus. Oh, come on, wife. Cashews, things like that. That's like my rider, basically. I do like chips and salsa. Oh, that's fun. Some of that, yeah. Never gets old.

Love chips and salsa. Yeah. That's the problem with the rider, though. Everything you, like, I have beef jerky, because growing up, we never had beef jerky. It was like $6.99 for a bag of it. Yeah. So we never had it. So I put on my rider, and now I'm like, ah, jerky. But you get tired of it? Yeah. I think.

I find that you have to switch up the rider. Yes. Otherwise it gets old. My agent put natural wine in my rider. Natural wine? Yeah, because we drank it one night. She's like, this is great. This should be in your rider. And I was like, yeah, sure. I was drunk. And now every club I get to is like, we have your natural wine. I'm like, sorry. Oh, no. Sorry about that. Damn. And then if I don't drink it, they're like, thanks. Yeah, a lot of times

I'm not even hungry because you forget that stuff's even going to be there. And then the person's like, I looked everywhere for these type of cashews or whatever. And you're like, I'm not actually very hungry. I'm so sorry. Yeah, it's true. My openers, I try to use guys who need a gig and they just pocket all my ridership. Oh, there you go. That's the best when you do gigs and you get snacks out of it. Oh, yeah. We used to take all Amy's stuff and

Schumer would have a sick ride. I bet she had great stuff. Amy has good taste in scotch, which is nice. She'd have like Lagavulin in there. We'd be like, this is like high-end shit. She was on those big shows, so that's some good treats back there. It was just a spread of like fruit and meats and cheeses and all that shit. And you know, we were young comics. We were eating dollar pizza, so having like a Havarti...

It was like, whoa, shit. Yeah. I'm like chips and salsa guys. Did you ever hear about, I forgot what, I think it was one of the Florida clubs, Eddie Griffin's demands that he gets the Air Force Ones. You've heard this, right? Uh-uh. He needs a new all-white Air Force Ones for every show. And after every set, he takes them and dumps them in an ice bucket so no one else can wear them. Oh, my God. I never heard that. And then I guess the guy I talked to at the club who ran the club was like,

yeah, you know, so I told him, I was like, oh, we couldn't find a fourth pair, so I'll go out and get it tomorrow. He's like, wait, they send you to get it? And he was like, yeah, and he's like, don't do it. It's all good. And he's like, someone has to get that. Someone's got to get it. That didn't occur to you that someone's day is ruined? Yeah. When he was face to face with the person, he changed his mind. At least like nuts in a ride or it's like, that's fuel.

Right. Maybe you didn't eat before. I have like basic shit too, coffee, but the wine thing I get is douchey. I might remove it. Well, natural wine for sure. It's douchey. That's a bit douchey. Although if you go to like Burlington or Portland, they're like, we have a special store. And I'm like, you know, but if, yeah, but if you're in like,

you know, Orlando. They're like, fuck you. Rightfully. I deserve it. They're like, oh, wine's natural. It's grapes. What the fuck? It's Florida. You were just, he was just in Orlando. That's like the toughest flight. I think that's the worst flight because of all the kids. Oh,

Oh, right. It's all 97-year-olds on dialysis and a kid who's just screaming the whole time next to you. They have the Disney ears on and they're running up and down the aisle. It was brutal. Yeah, I stayed in the airport hotel because I had a show the next day. I had to leave for it at like 6 a.m. and it was all Disneyland people coming in. I know. In my hotel, the walls were paper thin. I could hear the kids fighting over some game and I wanted to be like...

Let the other kid play. I wanted to chime in because I heard every piece of dialogue. It's brutal. Oh, my God. What's your favorite cities to perform in? I love Nashville, Dallas, Chicago. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

All the major cities. Yeah. Well, I did like a, I had a great show in like Mobile, Alabama. Oh, really? I had never performed there. That crowd was incredible. Chattanooga. Oh, yeah. Places like that really surprised me. Like, the people were so pumped. Wichita, that was a cool show. Nice. I think places where entertainment isn't as frequent, I mean, they have stuff, sure. Yeah. But like,

It's just... It's not like L.A. or New York where it's like every second. Where they're jaded. Yeah, there's like entertainment. Every corner, someone's like, come into this show right now. And you're like, please, I don't. Yeah, so it feels like more of a night out, I guess, you know, for everybody. So they're like pumped and... Oh, yeah. Plus, I started my tour...

Like June of last summer. So people were just kind of coming back out of their houses. And it was like the energy was like insane. Yeah. That was like the coolest. Getting back on the road. The best. It was like emotional. Yeah. It was crazy. I know. I never thought I'd feel that way touring. This is great. It felt like the audience liked comedy as much as we like it. Yeah. For the first time. Yeah. Because I always feel like I'm bothering them. Yeah. Because I barked.

You know? So when you bark, you just assume everyone hates stand-up. Right. Because they don't want to come in, you know? But then they were like... Which club did you... I barked for the Village Lantern. Not even a club. I did that one a few times, but I was always... Actually, I stayed away from there. It was almost too close to the cellar. Yeah. I wanted... I was more uptown, you know? Right. I...

That room, I took some of the worst bombs in my life. Oh, really? I mean, just humiliating. But you had to bark to get stage time? Yeah. But it was worth it. You weren't doing mics. It was kind of worth it at the time. In LA, you just had to bring friends to shows. They just had to pay for the shows and they'd let you do time. They have that here, too. But the barking, it's such a dense New York City thing. LA is too spread out for barking. Right.

It's such a New York thing. No one's walking. Yeah. They're on their cars like running you over. You have to go on the 405 and be like with those cones. Go to this show because there's no one. Yeah, there's no foot traffic. Yeah. I think it's something Mark says all the time on this podcast about how he thinks the best comedy clubs are blue cities and red states because you get the combination and it's

You know, in your special Sweet and Salty, like you talk about being a progressive and stuff. But, you know, you're from North Carolina. Yeah. Do you think that's...

that combination makes you like, you just understand the South in a way that. Yeah. I mean, I'm from there. My whole family lives there, but you know, I'm gay. So, and I live in Los Angeles. I know Mark is crazy, but, uh, so I have like this duality, you know, where it's like, I, I still talk to, you know, a bunch of friends from home and have family there. So I get that mentality of what's happened, you know,

what the South is, um, you know, red in certain areas and blue in certain areas. But, uh,

You know, if my other extended family members have different political beliefs, I'm not, like, shutting it down. Yeah. I don't agree with it, but we're not, like, not family because suddenly we don't agree on politics. They don't agree with my stuff. I don't agree with theirs, but we find common ground because we're family. Yeah. So, yeah. Unless you're an entertainer and you're good at that. I mean, that is, like...

One of the great things about entertainment is like, you know, you do The Road as a comic. You find ways to connect with people. Yeah. No matter what. Yeah. I mean, you know, I also don't do politics and stuff in my comedy because there are way more people that know what they're talking about more than me, you know. So why am I going to bring that to the table?

So I do the thing that I grew up seeing, which was storytelling. And that's a big part of the South. I was always seeing a lot of people in my family and other like crazy neighbors telling stories. You just listen to people talk forever. And I just kind of picked that up, I think. So my stand up ends up just being that. Yeah.

Yeah. And I feel like the South, much like New York, has a lot of characters. Oh, yeah. My uncle's a fucking nutbag. Yeah. People that you don't think are real people. Yes. And you try to describe them and you're like, I can't even describe you because it feels so bizarre.

It seems like I'm making up a caricature of a person. I do that all the time on the road. I'll do like too many subway character stories in a row. And I'm like, they're not going to believe this shit's real. But they're real. They're real, yeah. There are some crazy characters back home and especially growing up. But anytime I've ever tried to describe those people, people are like...

I don't know. I can't relate to this story. And then I'm all like, you had to be there. I think the people like progressive people who have right wing parents are the most open minded people I find because a lot of people who are super progressive, like anybody who's Republican, you're dead to me. Fuck you. And you're like, you're progressive. You're open minded. Like you're that's not inclusive. Right. You know, so I think that's those.

Well, they literally had to accept people. Yes. Exactly. Who they disagree with. Yeah. You know, there's something about it. Like, you know, you go on Twitter and shit and people are so divisive. And then we go out to our shows. I know there are people that came to see us. But you're like, man, it's like people are cool. People are chill. I'll even hang out with them after the show sometimes. I was hanging out after the show in Lexington, Kentucky over the weekend.

with some people who came out and they were just really down to earth good people yeah they're human beings no I know but it's like well yeah once you get off the internet you connect you connect with people a lot better but people spend so much time on there yeah that I think they forget yeah that people are basically pretty good right

And, you know, we went to the racetrack in Kentucky and it was fun. It was like little Keeneland, all the little kids in their blazers. It's hilarious. You know, they're all big hats. It's like the fucking stock market in Kentucky. Everyone's just yelling, go, go, go, go.

It's the redneck stock market. You're right. That was my opener. I said, I'm the worst dressed person here. I'm the only one in like a villain in Django Unchained. But they dress so well there. It's a cool scene. I mean, Lexington, Kentucky is a great city to visit. You know how they go, like they always say like, oh, you're racist because you had never hung out with black. You weren't exposed to black people. It's the same with political. If you're not exposed to other people,

political affiliated people, you're going to just assume, oh, they're just like...

women who are trying to go into Planned Parenthood. You know, it's not all that. It's a mix. It's some of that. It's some of that, but I think everybody has like a little bit of differences, but 86% of us are the same. We all eat. We shit. We get horny. We want to get drunk. We have anxiety. Our parents are annoying. But then we focus on like, oh, you believe in God? You're an idiot. You know, and...

It divides us, but we have so much more in common that we have different. The 14% is like the extremes on both sides. Right. Both can be pretty fucking annoying. Oh, God, yes. But how good athletes are your older siblings? All three of us played sports year round. Yeah. So we were pretty sporty. I was not...

much of a swimmer. I was talking about that. I know that bit. That's why I was thinking of that. Yeah, but my middle brother was an amazing swimmer, like Olympic bound at one point. Wow. My oldest brother was a really great tennis player and baseball player, soccer player. I played soccer, basketball, softball,

Wow. I played tennis and soccer in college. Jesus. So I love sports, yeah. Holy moly. Tennis is probably my best sport, which is funny because I don't look like a tennis player at all. But you can play. I can play, yeah. When I moved to L.A., I played in a league with just...

Like one other woman and all men. Yeah, yeah. I loved it. If I was going to pick up a sport, I'd want to pick up tennis. It's a classy game. It is. You can play forever, too. But now everyone's into pickleball. I've not played that yet. Everybody's talking about pickleball. Can you pull up? I don't even know what it looks like. I know LeBron and Raymond Green just invested in it. People are obsessed with it. It's a wooden paddle, right? It's a smaller court. And it's loud, though. It makes it like...

I don't even know what it looks like, honestly. And yeah, I don't know what kind of, is it not a wiffle ball? I think it is a wiffle. Is it? It's a wiffle ball with a wooden paddle, I think. You can't escape Ryan Reynolds. Huh? He's everywhere. What's he promoting now? I think Aviator Gin. No, he sold it. See, it's smaller, the court. Weird. And it's got that hollow sound. Yeah, you can hear the paddle.

Apparently people have been, uh, old people building their own pickleball courts and their neighbors are getting pissed cause it's so loud. Uh,

It is loud, yeah. Because tennis doesn't have that. You can hear tennis, but not that same sound. Wow. So it looks like it's kind of more of a net game. Yeah, it's like ping pong when it's standing on the table. I remember in college they had racquetball in one of the gyms, so I played a little. I was like, man, this is a really fun. I get why people are into this. Big, yeah. I remember Wall Street. They all played racquetball or squash. They're also very close to each other.

other. I know. This game, this is for children and old people. I don't know. I think I want to stick with tennis. Yeah, this is for disabled people. This is pathetic. These guys aren't old, are they? No. I see people playing this at my gym as me and a bunch of old people. They all died once Cuomo

But this is what they play because the ball takes so long to travel. It doesn't look like you can hit it as hard. No. See, that's what I love about tennis is the speed you can put on the ball. Yes, that's an adult sport. I love it when guys serve like 100-something miles an hour. That's my favorite. I like the grunt. Because then you hit it. You hit back on their speed, and then your ball flies right back at them.

Yeah. It's pretty great. It just seems cool. Federer just seems so cool, too. Oh, yeah. I really enjoyed his farewell and the hand-holding with Nadal. Yeah, it was heavy. It was a really special moment. Nadal is such a hot man. He is a hot man. I mean, Federer's good. Pull up Nadal. He's got the bad hairline. Well, that's just half.

recently okay but he used to have his arms dude he used to have a big full head of hair and he might be thinning out he's probably the best on the planet i'd say whoa his arms dude but i love seeing them get so emotional with each other with federer retiring they were like held hands at one point cried together he gave federer the hardest time i know but they were like

besties in real life apparently tennis is like the number one sport for me that I don't seek out but if I come across it on TV I'm glued to the TV yeah look at that these guys these guys when you see it in person it's so they're they're all back

They hit so hard. Oh, look at that. If that didn't make you too gay, I don't know what will. I want those jeans off now. Yes. I mean, that is a pretty erotic picture. He's been a bad boy. Jamie, what do you think? You're a heterosexual lady. Yeah, Jamie, what do you think? It's trying too hard. I mean, that's a sexy photo, though. Just like, look at it, you know? It really is sexy. It is a lot. I've never seen that one before. Oh, God. See? I can find them attractive. I mean, that's a lot. Look at that. Wow. Wow.

I mean, look, he's got it. Why not? Go for it. Yeah, yeah. All right. I was wrong. All right. Well, guess we're all gay now. You turned us. I knew it would happen. A couple of whiskey wines. I was worried it was contagious. Fuck. Damn. I never knew he did underwear. Jesus. Rune. Dang. Hot tamale. Oh, and pulling it down in the back. A little tease there. Wow.

Okay. Is he a Spaniard? He is from Spain. Oh, nice. Wow. I see one of them Spaniards. Oh, yeah. The Louisiana comes out. Some of those Italians.

Oh, you rule, Jamie. Thank you. I'm coming up soon there, J-Mo. I'm still nursing, man. Oh, nursing, yeah. Nursing up. I'm coming up soon if we keep looking at these photos right here. Crazy. Any sport where it's one-on-one, I watch, I prefer. Yeah? MMA, tennis. Because it's all on you. You know, in team sports, a lot of the time, the best player just gets blamed anyway. Mm-hmm.

So there is something kind of cool about you being like, yeah, it was my fault. Exactly. It was my fault. Yeah, I suck today. It's why improv isn't fun to watch. You know? I'm like, I don't want team. I want to stand up. Give me one person up there fighting for their life. But I do love, like, I mean, I'm such a big basketball fan. I do love that they have to find ways to work together. No, that's fucking great. You like the teamwork. Who's your team? I'm a diehard Knicks fan. Knicks fan, yeah. Okay. How about you? Yeah.

I don't really follow basketball too much. I like the college sports. I mean, Carolina. What's your Carolina team? UNC. Oh, no. That's a nice team to root for. Is that the Baby Blue? Yep. Tar Heels. Aha, Tar Heel. What the hell is a Tar Heel? Honestly, it's probably not great. I don't know. Let's hope it's not a slur. Oh, I don't really know what it is. All right. It says over there, the...

A Rosen here or a Tar Heel implies that they worked in a lowly... Hold on, go left. A lowly trade. So it's like a blue-collar person. Oh, Carolina soldiers. Flip the meaning of the term.

I don't really know. Oh, all right. So they made it positive. That's the problem with the South. You're like, let's not look up history. Let's not learn about this. I just like the basketball team, but I don't want to dig too much into it. Someone will eventually write a letter and that'll go away. Oh, no.

I'm sure. Tar Heel is derogatory term in both race and class. It's coming. But then the mascot is a... What is it? It's a guy in blackface, I think. No. That's true. Guys. Hey, folks. When you want a smooth high that you know is made right here in the U.S. of A, look no further than Ounce of Hope. Based out of Memphis, Tennessee, Ounce of Hope

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Get sheath underwear and let them support your balls. It's like that thing. It's like a bull. Is that a bull? A ram? A ram? Ramses. Ramses. I honestly did not know that. Ramses is kind of a cool name. Yeah, Ramsey. Ramses. It's the ram mascot. All right. There you go. What's your routine on the road? Because you're doing theaters and you're like every...

Every day you're probably going to a different city, right? Do you do the bus? Do you fly? What do you do? I'm not doing... I didn't do the bus thing because I have to go back to LA during the week because... Radio. Yeah, I do the radio show with Tom Papa. And then I also do a lot of acting stuff. So that's usually something I have to fly back for. You were on the Mindy show? Yeah, I did Mindy show. I just finished five months in Toronto. I filmed this action show with Arnold Schwarzenegger. What's it going to be on?

Yeah, it's cool. It's going to be on Netflix sometime next year. That's huge. That's amazing. Do you like the show? I loved it. I never... So you have a big role in it. Yeah, I mean, I'm in every episode. I'm in the CIA. I'm like in the field, guys. I'm doing action stuff.

What's that? Did you get the ear thing? Yeah, we had the ear things and the weapons. What's, I mean. Get down. Get to the chopper. Three sets of the maid. That was a trip, like shooting guns beside Arnold. That's insane. We're like army crawling across the floor, explosions everywhere. He hasn't done something in a while, I feel like. No.

Well, he's never done TV. Wow. This is his first TV show. TV's different, though. Those guys of that era, I think they get caught up. Yeah. Or at least did for a period being like, I'm not doing TV. Well, movies were so prestigious back then. And all his movies made like a bazillion dollars. Totally. So, yeah. But he was like a kid in a candy store. He loved it every day. Wow.

And he was the governor of California. And Mr. Universe, he's done so much. He's cool. We went to his house. We went to his house a couple weeks ago. Yeah. Well, what's his house like? Oh, great. I mean, awesome. It's all awesome. Wow. Does he have a crazy gym in the house? Uh,

I didn't see his gym, but he has like a statue of, you know. Of young Arnold. Yeah. Pumping iron Arnold. He has some cool paintings of himself. He's a legend, dude. It was cool. I held the Conan the Barbarian sword. That's your lesbian's dream. That's right. Wow. Why don't you? But he's like, yeah, he's like...

has so many cool stories like he's friends with like everybody of course you're like yeah i think who wouldn't want to be friends with arnold yeah he's been doing this for decades oh yeah he's a smart guy yeah if you hear him speak you're like he's a very educated yeah yeah yeah

They're smart. Thank you. Yeah, so it was awesome doing that. So, yeah. So, then I'll go on the road and do, I'll do like three or four nights and then come back and then go back out. I'm finishing up my tour right now here in the Northeast. So, I'm driving everywhere. Are you enjoying the last few shows? You're like, I can do these older jokes. I'm enjoying working this material until my special comes out. Yeah.

And then, you know, now I've got to write a whole new act. I mean, that's where I'm at. It's high stress. I mean, that's why I'm doing these like weird, kind of smaller cities just because I'm like, let me try to build here in smaller clubs. You guys seem to write a lot. Like you guys seem to always be pumping out material. I love it. I mean, I love it. I mean, it's really like Mark and I have been bouncing bits since we were like open micers almost. We all always talk to each other about bits and stuff.

That's fine. We would always be like, hey, has this been done? Or is this fun? You know, it's like stuff like just have a friend to be like, is this horrible? Tell me this is horrible. Right. But then you kind of, yeah, I mean, I'm more confident now that I don't feel like I have to do that as often, but we still do it. Oh, yeah. I still text you. That's nice. Maybe with an idea. Yeah, I'll run stuff by some friends. Who are your comic friends? I think...

talk a lot with Erin Foley. Oh, I like Erin. Yeah, yeah. She's really good at like, I'll, we'll Zoom and I'll tell her like a story that I'm thinking about and she'll kind of like, you know, say like, oh, that's, you know, there's something there or like maybe, you know, expand on that more or,

If neither one of us are really like responding to it, we're like, no, maybe we'll just put that back in the notes. Just even having a friend to like let you go. Yeah. Yes. You know, and let you talk it out. Talk it out. I do with Stavros a lot, you know, or like our friend Ron on Hirshberg as well. But like just have a friend to let you talk it out. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, it's nice. You find the bit. Yeah, sometimes I'll ask Tom, Tom Papa. He's a good writer. We love him. I'm like, is there anything to this premise or whatever? He's got a great laugh, too. When you make him laugh, you feel good. Both of you have a good laugh. You're both very positive. Yeah, your show is fun to do because you're both easy. Yeah, we're just like one of those talk to people about comedy. Yeah. Then you do Jim and Sam and they're like, you fucking homo. Yeah.

It's 8 in the morning. You can say that to YouTube if you want. Yeah, right? Who were your comics growing up that you were like, those are the people that got me in the stand-up? I think I was more of an SNL gal. Interesting. Yeah, because I actually started at the Groundlings in L.A. I started in sketch and improv. Those people. Hey, I did improv as well.

yeah so i started more in the sillier yeah version of comedy like crazy characters i still have like so many characters that no one's ever seen oh because i never put them online or anything i did them at the groundlings and it was like pre is like youtube was just kind of right on a thing and can we get a can you hum a few bars can we get the wacky i mean it's always like some i like to

play older women who were like, you know, have short spiky hair or something. Very sparkly outfit. And you would dress up? I would dress up. I like lots of makeup. I like just being someone totally different than myself. Sure, sure. I would play like a lounge singer who's like...

Talking about her signature cocktail. Yeah. You know, just like crazy people. I've played crazy people. That's fun. Very big, broad characters. So, yeah. So, that's where I started. So, SNL was always the thing I watched every weekend. Who were your favorites on SNL? I mean, I was. Well, the first class was the Sandler. Oh, yeah. Farley.

Spade Days. Yes. Rock. Yeah. Then it went into Molly Shannon. Oh, I love Molly Shannon. Sherry O'Terry, Will Ferrell, that crew. They were the most influential. Yeah. Because that was when I was younger and really watching...

the show a lot more. Yeah, yeah. Molly Shannon is so insanely funny. So funny. Killer. And a great serious actor. Yeah. The movie where she had cancer. Yeah. I forgot the name of it, but Chris Kelly wrote it. Yeah. She should have gotten an Oscar for it. She's incredible. Yeah, she's really good. Have you heard the rumor about her? What? You've heard, huh? What is it? She banged a guy and the sex was so passionate that he had a heart attack. Oh!

For real? Yeah, that's like one of those Hollywood stories. No. I don't buy it. Pull it up. Is it in her book? Probably. Her book was very popular. Yeah, I read an interview with her in the LA Times and it was tragic. Her life story was tragic. Oh, yeah. Her accident?

Something like her. I wrote her a fan letter as a child when she was on SNL and she wrote back. I still have the autographed picture from her. Oh, wow. That's cool. Yeah. I wrote Robin Williams when I was a kid. Whoa. And we got a letter. I found that letter when I was home recently. He wrote back? He wrote back. Wow.

Yeah, I got like a signed picture. Did you ever meet him later in life? I met him very briefly. I was doing like a show at the Meltdown Comics place. Okay. All right. All right. It's been disproven. I'm glad we have a fact checker though. I guess the rumor was two men. Oh, all right. I didn't know that. Fuck two men to death. There you go. That was so funny. Oh, it was a plot of Curb. That's where I heard it.

okay. I thought it was real. I like how that stuff catches on though. Oh yeah, that's how they're Richard Gere gerbil. That's our Gere. Look it up. Yeah. Um, but, uh, I forgot what you asked. Oh,

I don't even know. Oh, Molly Shedd. About Robin Williams. Robin Williams' letter. Yeah, that was... Oh, I met him at Meltdown Comics. Oh, yeah. That was a hot show. He just showed up and was watching in the back of the room. And I was leaving and I saw him...

He had left the room and he was very shy. I was like, I just want to say I'm a big fan. He's like, thank you. That was very funny. Like head down kind of thing. Fortune peeper. Very funny. Definitely wasn't on. I mean, that was probably like eight months before he died. A year. You did it. You pushed him over the edge. I did it. I met his daughter on Friday.

like a year and a half ago. Really lovely. Two years ago, something like that. Yeah. Yeah. Damn. But yeah, I loved him. I didn't watch a ton of standup. I watched like him and Whoopi Goldberg, Ellen, people like that. Yeah. Show those, those,

Have you met Ellen? Just from like across the room. Oh, really? Yeah, but we've never met. It was one of those like, hi, hi kind of things. Oh, yeah, New Orleans. She's from New Orleans. That's right, yeah. She never reps us, but... Just, that's weird. She don't want to talk about New Orleans. It's weird to just get away from a person that famous. That's how I met Larry David, just a wave. Oh, yeah? He was like where Matt is, about that far away. And Amy Schumer went, hey, this is Mark, Larry. And he went...

I want to like hug him and kiss him on the lips, but you got to play it cool. Well, it was right when things were like opening back up in LA after the pandemic. So people were kind of not coming near each other. And we were outside on a patio of a restaurant and, and I've,

I noticed my wife was like kind of staring at somebody and I'm like, who is she staring at? And I look behind me and it's Ellen is sitting down and we make eye contact and she's like, hi. She's like, I'm a fan. Oh, wow. You left that part out. That's a big part. Yeah, that was nice. And I was like, oh, thank you. Me too. You know, we just had that kind of like, oh. Then she dumped hot coffee on the assistant's head as she was walking away. And that was...

Yeah, that was them. Yeah, if I caught my wife looking at Ellen, I would start looking at Portia. Are they still together? Yeah. Oh, all right. That's impressive. That's been a long time. Yeah, like how many years is that? Yeah, at least 15. 18 or 20. Yeah, good for them. Yeah. Even stuck through the bad times for Ellen when she was young. Wow.

Now they're trying to drag Bill Murray. That's the new one. I know. You see it on Twitter. Everyone's like, Bill Murray's inappropriate. I'm like, so now people are getting canceled for being mean? Oh, yeah. It's Hollywood. You can't be me, baby. I know. That's the point of getting to be a celebrity. You can be me. I've read a lot of old Hollywood books, and I'm like, some of these people, I'm like, holy shit, they're lucky. Dennis Hopper is lucky he's dead. Sinatra, all these guys. Mark's like, I can't wait to be me. Yeah.

Yeah, because you've got to be nice coming up. And then once you get there, it's like, hey, get my coffee. You're like, I don't need friends. Oh, yeah. Sinatra was like a manic depressive who was awful to people. Oh, really? Yeah. I didn't know that. Oh, my God. He said to Bob Evans, he's like, get my wife out of that movie or I'll kick your ass. And he called her. And he's like, if you do that movie, we're getting divorced. And she's like, I'm doing the movie. And he sent divorce papers to the set. Oh, wow. Oh, yeah. And by the way, he was 60 and she was 21. Uh-huh.

Problematic. Maybe you should date someone not 39 years younger than you, and you won't have these problems. He's like, a woman my age would listen. But like, dude, I mean, Mia Farrow, can you get more opposite than Sinatra? I know. And then who's the other guy she was with? The famous conductor, right? Philip Glass. I know. Who is it? I don't know.

I mean, like, she does not have a type. That's all I'm saying. Yeah, for sure. It definitely varies. Uh-oh.

Mia Farrow. Spouses. Andre Previn. Yeah, there we go. Oh, wow. She doesn't have a type. That's my problem. Oh. That was him back in the day to the right. Oh, okay, okay. It looks like if you mush Sinatra and Woody Allen together, you get him. Aging does not look fun. No, no. Aging is bad. It's better for some than others.

Man, that's... That stopped the whole pod in a track. We're all pondering life now. She doesn't look great there either. She looks a little... Well, that haircut's not the best. It doesn't suit her. A little page boy. But she... No, she was beautiful. Yeah. There you go.

Wow. I got to ask you about the gambling stuff. Is that real? The gambling? You said your parents were gamblers in one of your bills. Oh, I said I had someone in my family, not my parents, where they had a gambling situation and my parents.

grandmother paid off a lot of those debts. Wow. So that didn't help my family's financial situation. It was like, cause my great, my grandfather was a prominent contractor. He designed a bunch of houses and schools and churches in North Carolina and had built them. He had a company. So he did really well for himself.

But he died unexpectedly when my mom was 17 and my grandmother was just like a housewife and she's like, I don't know what to do. So he left a hardware company. This was like pre-Lowe's and Home Depot. And she eventually, then those big stores came in. They were going under, but she was too proud to file bankruptcy. It was just a series of bad business things where

So eventually all the money he had left her was totally gone. So when I came, when I came through, my family had that like history of having money, but no money. And my dad was like from a trailer park and never had a dime hitchhike to school. Never had a birthday cake, a whole different story.

So I come from this weird duality of like my mom's from like high society but no money. Right. But she had it back in the day and my dad's totally from a trailer park and, you know, eating chicken wings and, you know, watching NASCAR. So, yeah, I have this whole weird thing.

dual thing yeah you have so much to pull from i mean there's so much stuff in your stand-up that i'm like i it felt so like it feels so real yeah all the stories are are real it's all based it's all based on totally true things i just embellish everything you gotta you gotta yeah yeah like there's a story in my new um special where i talk about proposing to my now wife and

Like, the guy that was part of the waiter in the story, he's, like, that stuff happened-ish, but he's, like, two people combined. Yeah. I took traits from, like, another person. You know what I mean? Yeah. And so, you know, if...

Sometimes we'll say you made that bit up. I'm like, I combined two characters in one. It's different. Yeah. Sometimes you just have to save time. It's editing more than making up. Yeah, you have to edit for the story to make it more interesting and moving along. You're not telling like a bio. I'm not telling a biography. Right. But all the stories are true. It's just you're pulling from different parts of life. Yeah. I don't even mind making up because then it also shows some creativity. Yeah. It's fiction. Yeah. Or, you know, if somebody's... Unless the laugh is like...

It's true. This happened. Unless you're doing that. But yeah, of course, people make shit up. Yeah, or you like... But as long as there's some truth in there. For sure. As long as there's some part of the story is 100% always going to be true. Everything I tell is based on something that happened. But it's like, how can I make this... Because some of my stories are like eight minutes, ten minutes. You're like, how can I get people to sit...

there listen to that for eight minutes you gotta make it more it's impressive because i'm not mark and i aren't really storytellers like i'll mark is just pure bits yeah you have some stories no i do i usually will close each hour on a story because i i just for rhythmically it's my i think my structure will get predictable if i don't mix it up somehow and also i usually have one story i don't know where else to put it except the end i think it's kind of an interesting way to end it but uh but i'll be watching your story sometimes and i'm like

I'm kind of like, you know, I'm watching because I'm enjoying it, but I'm also watching like, how the fuck is she going to end this? Yeah. Because that's the hardest part of the story for me. That's a compliment. No, it really is. And sometimes you watch a story and you're like, I don't know how it's going to end. And the ending is so hard. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Do you usually, when you write a bit, do you have the ending? You know the ending? Or are there times when you're going along and you're like, I got to figure out something? Yeah. I try.

On Sweet and Salty and Good Fortune, I tried to make both beginning, middle, and end like a narrative. Like we're going to follow a timeline. But I worked really hard to try to find what can I pull from the beginning and bring back at the end. Ah, the Wheel of Fortune. That they don't see coming. Sorry.

So that I don't ever know. It takes a while to find that. Right. Whatever that thing is that brings it back around. That's tough. But I never, you know, I only go into every story with like a sentence. Whoa, that's crazy. Like, I, you know, proposed to my wife and it went wrong. Right. What happened?

and let me think about it. Well, that ropes you right in. Yeah. Because I want to hear what happened. Yeah. Exactly. So everything is like, yeah, the stuff I'm trying to work on now, I'm like, okay, I have like a...

an idea of what could be an interesting premise, maybe, but I don't know what the story is yet, you know? Ooh, I don't envy you guys. Because this is a tough, you just put out a special both of you, and I'm in that sweet spot where I got, my hour is really cooking. It's like 90% done. So anything I add is just,

It's just land yamp. That's awesome. That's the best place. Well, creating is fun, but editing is tough. And I'm in that point right now where like, I'll have 50 minutes that's brand new. And I'm like, I got 50. It's not all working, but I got 50 to play with. Yeah. That turns into 37 very quickly. Then I get back up to 45. Then I'm down to 32. It's this weird dance where I just keep cutting shit. That's a good comic. Yeah. Yeah, because a lot

people would just stick with their stuff even if it wasn't working well then you kind of cut the stuff and you're like this is an award document and I guess that'll either be later in this hour or it'll be for the next one because I kind of get rid of stuff if I can't crack it yeah we'll revisit it in like a month and a half with fresh eyes but I mean when you have a story it's so much I'm just interested because it is it's just different than us so I watch story comics like you know someone like you or like

I remember Ari Shaffir gave me really good advice once with a story where he said, you know... End it with Kobe. I thought it was interesting advice. He said...

add a line in here and then go back to that line at the end like add something so it almost gives you an out if you can't crack it oh interesting like don't force a callback but he's like there's a way you can add something here yeah you know like my mom said this you know to me that's good and then at the end you go well my mom didn't think you know something like that right right you almost go back to the line that you add yeah if you can't crack it and I thought that was like yeah that's interesting someone who only tells stories like Ari yeah that's interesting that's good yeah huh

I heard some advice was you're telling a story and maybe you're not mentioning something the whole time, but the audience is kind of thinking it. And then if you say that thing at the end, they're like, oh,

He knows that we were thinking. They kind of give you a big pop for that. Like, I have this whole joke about going to see a slave movie with my black friend, and it was super awkward. And at the end, I go, I shouldn't give away my joke, but at the end, I go, and that's how I made slavery about me. Right. That's a great joke. And it kills because they're like, oh, we kind of thought that throughout the whole thing. Like, you're making this.

Like you're the victim. Right, right. And at the end I say that and they're like, all right, he's aware that he's a psycho. You're self-aware. Yeah. Self-aware is points. It's points. It's true, yeah. You know when you go, that joke bombed, they get a huge laugh because they're like, oh, he knows it bombed. Yeah. Yeah, I'd rather them at least know I'm not doing, I know I'm not doing well. I'll do that sometimes when I'm bombing. I'm like, I know this is going badly and they're like, all right, at least he knows. Yeah, exactly. At least he's not bad.

and delusional. You take some of the pressure off them. They're like, okay, we're all on the same page now. Which is the essence of comedy. You're basically saying like, I'm aware of what's going on here. I know what you're thinking. Yeah. Well, if I'm following the same sort of timeline

that I've been doing with the last few specials. The first one was very much about me like finding myself, figuring out who I was. The second one was like now I'm an adult. This is how I am as an adult. It's not necessarily what you would think. And I'm getting engaged, married, so now full-fledged adult and this is what it is. So now if I'm going from that, then whatever's next would be like what is the next thing that I'm dealing with as

And, you know, I'm seven years into a relationship, two years married, and kind of digging into that material. That's good. And then the audience grows with you. Yeah. So it's like an, so every special is a mini evolution. Right. I don't know. Bargatze's similar. Yeah. He does that. I'm doing a thing where I'm aggressing fully. Yeah.

And each special, I'm getting slightly worse. Yeah. Well, that's a journey, too. And they're watching me spiral, and it's fun. Well, I think that this one, I want to bring more of my mom and my wife into stories together. Uh-huh. Yeah. Does your mom like your wife? She does, but it was at first, like, that feeling of probably feeling replaced a little bit. Wow.

I know men have that. You should meet my mom. I'm about the same. Men experience that more, so I think, than women. But my parents split when I was 12. So I like weirdly sort of took on this like husband role for my mom. I was like, she was like my plus one kind of person. Like oftentimes, like when I got older, I would...

come home for Christmas and my brothers were married with kids and I'd be the single one. So I was like my mom's companion, the like dinner partner. We went on a cruise together. Wow. Yeah, like a five day Christmas cruise together. I mean, I wanted to jump off that boat every

I wonder how many people have just purposely committed suicide. I don't. Because they were with someone they couldn't stand on the boat. We talked to the chaplain and a lot of people die on cruises. Yeah. A lot of old people. Like. Yeah. Like not. Yeah. They're not jumping off the boat. Oh, okay. But like they're just old and they die. Yeah. You gotta die somewhere. So he's like constantly giving like last rites. I heard Robert Riley just died on the boat. Yeah.

Four people will get that. Google it. Yes. So, yeah, I think I want to dig in. So when I met my wife, I think my mom knew right away it was a significant person. So it took her a while to warm up to her. She was no longer. I now had a new plus one. Jax is the one that I'm going to be traveling with and taking the things. So sometimes I'd fly my mom out. Does she come every week?

What's that? To shows? Yeah, not everyone, but like one weekend on, one off, like that kind of thing. That's a nice balance. Yeah, but my mom, she's always like, I want to go to Europe. I'm like, no, you can't. No, thank you. So I think there's got to be some stories in there about navigating those relationships. I don't know what those stories are yet.

They'll come. I used to have a bit about how my mom would always say, like, you know, I'd be dating girls and my mom would be like, I don't like her. And I'm like, yeah, of course not. She's you. That's why I don't like her. And then my dad would always go, I think she's great. Yeah. Yeah. There's no threat there. Yeah. My gal always says that every guy she's dated, whenever she meets the mom, there's tension. Yeah. It's just.

It's instinct or it's innate. Well, because normally you do find that with men introducing their mom to the new girlfriend. It's not as common with women. Sure. Yeah. That's lucky me. Yeah.

I think the heterosexual women get the dad who's like, get away from my daughter. Yeah, exactly. But you seem close with your mom, though. Very close. Yeah. So I just, my mom's provided a lot of material over the years. So I feel like there's got to be fun. For the Hooters story. That was totally true, too. But yeah, just kind of navigating the two of them.

You know, the two strong women in my life has been a journey. How did you meet your wife? At Chicago Pride. Oh, wow. Look at that. Yeah. I never thought you could meet a significant other in a Pride event, you know, where everyone's hammered. But we, yeah, ran into each other and kept running into each other all night. Just kept, you know...

somehow ended up in the same space and wow I'm scissoring then we scissored that could be your third special title hey you keep growing then we scissored that's not real is it it's not really a big thing I didn't think so that's like porn for men I feel like yeah

Yeah. Yeah. It's more fun for guys to think about two girls just, you know. Just rubbing. Yeah. Rubbing. It's a very male thought. But it doesn't do it. We don't like women with strap-ons because then we're like, yeah, we're being replaced. Yeah. Exactly. You don't like that. Exactly. But yeah, people are not really rubbing like that as much. Yeah.

And then every girl I know, she's like, I watch lesbian porn over man-woman. I've heard that too. Every woman. I think it's a, you know, balls are gross. Because they know what they're doing? Yeah, maybe that. Because balls are gross. Yeah, I've heard a lot of my straight lady friends like the lesbian porn. Yeah. Yeah. That's fascinating. I don't know.

I don't know. Do women like men? I have no idea. Do women like men? It's debatable. Are we calling this episode, Do Women Like Men? I don't know. It's debatable. What do you guys bring to the table? You go on TikTok, it's just like, men are the worst, whatever. So you're like, maybe they don't like me. And then they're also like, when are you going to ask me to marry you? And I'm like, wait, so do you hate me or do you want to be with me? Which one is it? These drinks are going down smooth. Oh.

I'm feeling this. This is great. Pregnant waiter. This is a new thing. I know. Or a bartender. Pregnant waiter. Did you like that other one better? I do. Honestly, I prefer the whiskey sour. Sorry, Chris Hart. Sorry, Chris. You bought me a sweet ribeye, though. It did look nice. Yeah. It's just like water. It should have been.

It looked classy as hell, but I like my wine and my whiskey separate. Yeah, I think so. Yeah. Exactly. That's what we learned today. We're not bi. No. No, we tried. We tried it. As long as you tried. Open-minded. Oh, give me a... Does anyone have a rec? Anyone? Either of you? I got a rec. Yeah, what do you got? Well...

I try not to do movies because I feel like I do movies all the time. We do so many movies. We watch a lot of movies. This movie really just tickled the taint. And it's a horror slasher movie, which is not my favorite. But it's so well done. Scorsese's raving about this guy. Spielberg loves this guy. He's like a new guy on the scene. The movie's called X.

X. Pull it up. It's called X. Like, E-X or just X? Just X the letter. Oh, I've not heard of this. It's, Peters has seen it. You liking that? Oh, you haven't? Oh, okay. It's a throwback to like, like a chainsaw maker. A24, they make some interesting stuff. They are so good. So good. Go to Rotten Tomatoes. What are we looking at? Critics and audience. Oh, I'm nervous.

It kind of shakes up the genre. 94%, right? Oh, 94%. Look at that. There you go. Audience score is 75%. I'm shocked the audience was not higher. Sometimes the audience gets it wrong, too, though. But yeah, it's really good. You can't predict it. It's different, but you think you know it, but you don't know it. It's one of those. Did you watch it with the lady or in theaters? I watched it on the road with a comic in a hotel room. I was like, let's not get hammered tonight for one night, and we watched a movie, and we had a couple white claws. White claws.

But it was really good. Kid Cudi's in it. Kid Cudi kills it. Kid Cudi. And it's a hell of a premise. I don't want to give anything away. Maybe I'll watch this. I got a movie rec too. It's an old one though. But it's a great, I revisited it. It's a fucking masterpiece. It's an old movie. It's a Robert Altman movie. It's called Nashville if you haven't seen it. Oh.

I've not seen it, but obviously I know it's a musical. It's, it's a brilliant movie. Thank you. It really is. Keith Carradine won the Oscar for best song. I've never seen it. Lily Tomlin was nominated for it. Oh man. It's a great fucking movie. Altman's a genius. I was, I couldn't stop listening to music on the road this weekend. Really? I don't know what it is. Something about being in the South. I'll just start listening to country music. But, uh, but it's great music. And, uh,

It's like Altman. It's like they sing country music in it? Yeah, but it tells a story. It's incredible. Altman really was a genius. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, The Player is one of my favorite movies, too. Yes. Smash. I got to rewatch this. Nashville is my friend Ronan Hirshberg's number one movie of all time. What? Wow.

I think it's one of the best. I feel like there's a lot of movies I need to see from back in the day. Karen Black was great. Five Easy Pieces, Karen Black. Yes, yes. Wow. All right. I'll rewatch that. High recommend Nashville. High recommend. But going in, it is a musical and it takes, all movies take a minute. Yes, yes. So you gotta let it settle in. Let it settle. It's not, it's the same for your TikTok generation. Where do you watch it? Online? It's not, yeah, you can just rent it on Amazon. Okay.

It might be streaming too. Oh, they have an 84% audience score. It's a classic. Okay. It's a classic. Shelley Duvall. Shelley Duvall. She disappeared forever and they just found her again. Oh, really? Yeah. She went out to the desert or something. I can never tell if these people are happy if they lost it. I think she fell on hard times. Yeah, probably. But man, if you look at her resume, she was in so many things. The Shining, Annie Hall. Popeye. Yeah.

Yeah. She was olive oil, for Christ's sake. Olive oil. Wow. Okay. All right. Nashville. I'll tell you. Roxanne. I used to love that movie. Yeah. That was good. Yeah. No, she was great. I haven't watched any movies. Really? It's hard now. I don't have any good recommendations other than I went to that. A lot of people would know this place, but I had a sandwich at Potbelly again. Potbelly's all right. That place is so good. It's not bad. I don't know.

As far as the sandwich seems, I think it's actually toward the top. I think it's pretty great. It's great. And the soups are good, too. They got salad. The sugar cookie was phenomenal. Oh, so good. I think that not a lot of people know about their cookie situation. The sugar cookie is awesome. Good sugar cookie is fucking huge. It's a better Jason's Deli. Because Jason's Deli is fine. They kick it up a notch. And you can get these peppers on the sandwich that are tasty. I love it. I don't know. We don't have.

them in LA I don't think they're in the west coast but man it feels like a midwest thing yeah I think it started like in the Chicago area but I had one recently and I forgot how much I really like pop belly good rec that's a great rec I used to always go there when I played zanies in Chicago so it makes sense it's like almost next door to there right there's one in midtown on pop belly so yeah RIP Sarah Doms who used to be interviewed for the Interrobang we did an interview in there

Oh, really? Yeah, she was a good person. Big comedy person. Wow. And you can get your sandwiches toasted. It used to be that only Quiznos did that. That's right. Quiznos is underrated while we're on it. Yeah, I haven't been there in forever. But Quiznos ain't bad. But I think I like Potbelly. I prefer Potbelly to Quiznos. Probably, yeah. Okay, then, yeah. Both no pedophilia. Oh, yeah, maybe it started in Chicago.

I remember I tell it a bit in one of his specials where he said he was doing a show in the Middle East. He goes, I couldn't remember the guy's name. It was something with a lot of Q's, U's, and Z's. I called him Queeznose. He even mispronounces it, which is funny. Queeznose. So stupid, but it could kill me. I just picture him walking by a Queeznose and being like, that's a funny word. I'll use that.

Six years. I'll write a joke about that. He showed up at Mark's bachelor party and he was in such a bad mood. Oh, really? We did the episode here and Attell showed up just like... He got up at one point and was looking around and goes, oh, I'm sorry, I'm just looking for some punchlines. Oh, no. Was this the bachelor party? He did one in Florida and I couldn't go because I went to Dana Gould's wedding in California and then...

You know, a lot of comics went there. So we did our own thing here. Yeah. We had a bunch of comics on. We had Joe DeRosa, Godfrey, Shane Gillis. Yeah, it was wild. Sean Patton, David Tell, Gary Vee. You guys had a big orgy. Yeah. And we did the... Big orgy. We did have a male stripper come by just to mix it up. A cop. A hot Dutch guy. Was your thing with Bert, was that what the Florida one was? Yes. Yes. That was where a bunch of you guys were at like a...

We rented a giant house. He'll be at the bachelor party and not the wedding. Yeah, exactly. He flew on a private jet to come meet us at a fun party. Did he really? Yeah. Respect. Dang. From Italy. I'm in a rental car driving around the Northeast. Have you done the private jet for your own gigs yet? No, I have not. You'll be there soon. I'm not quite there.

You will be. I don't know. I've never been in a private jet. What? I don't know you guys have. I'm shocked. As openers. As openers, yeah. Listen, you're in one. And Epstein's Island. Yeah, yeah. But that was a cool island. I'm not in one for the environment.

There you go. That's a good save. I feel the same way. Although I did hear that Leonardo DiCaprio flies private. Yeah, he's a big climate change guy. I think he's a big climate change guy. He does make up for it, though. He raised a lot of money. Yeah. And a lot of women. Woo!

Always with the singers in here. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So when you, was Chelsea lately one of your first like really big breaks? Because I remember you really popping off in that show. I'm thinking people that really, Josh Wolf was another one, right? Who like really? Moshe Kasher, Natasha was on. Was Moshe big? I didn't remember Moshe. Joe was big, yeah. Bobby Lee. Uh-huh, uh-huh.

Yeah, it was my first big gig. I did Last Comic Standing in 2010. Right. That was my first TV thing. Wow. And then got Chelsea six months later. Yeah. Last Comic's a tough experience. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, when I was...

when i did it they had been off for like two years and but before they were all like living in the house together and stuff like very reality yeah yeah so i was like i'm not sure worse i don't know i mean i was like i cannot live in a house with a bunch of comics but they're like no we already do that it's called home yeah they're like it's just stand-up so i said well i can

do stand up I mean I'm not on TV before I remember when Gabriel Gleis was on it they like kicked him off for texting someone while in the house oh really and I was like you can't text wow yeah that yeah I couldn't do that how are you supposed to survive oh yeah there's Lonnie Love god I really look at that I

I really, uh, this is back when TV was fun. My wardrobe choices were dicey for many years. You got a tie on. My hair was really dark. I had a tie on. You kept it classy. Yeah. What's Chewie doing? He died. He did. Oh. Yeah. Uh,

Two or three years ago, maybe. Sad. If you're that small, the life expectancy isn't... Time has no... Time is really off for me right now because of the pandemic. Yeah. I can't remember what was pre-pandemic. I know. It was almost like the last two and a half years have kind of stood still. Do you think you and your wife got closer during the pandemic? Or do you think it tested some shit? That is a test. Well, I mean, we got married in the pandemic, so...

I think we passed the test. Yeah. The other way. Well, you learned that like. No one here. You learned that like that you're kind of each other's people. Right. You know, like when we couldn't see anybody else, we had to lean on each other. What was your pandemic routine? Was there anything you did? I was a slob.

Oh, my God. Well, because I didn't realize how much I'd been hustling. Yes, exactly. For like so many years. Once you shut off, it's almost like being an athlete and you don't work out anymore. And you're like, well, I guess I'm just out of shape. I put on like so much weight. But then getting back into shape is so painful. I mean, getting back on the stage, I was like, this is really painful. I had a stutter when I first got back on stage. Oh, my God. Wow. I was really worried. I remember I came to New York last July and I was...

did the cellar and I was talking to comics I go I have a stutter right now I don't know where it came from but then it eventually just went away that's wild but yeah I think because I had nervousness I don't know if or just not talking like that on stage you know I couldn't like my words just wouldn't come out it's a muscle you lose it quick it's weird how quick stand up is yeah so I think I like was I just didn't realize how much I had just been constantly working constant constant like

And, you know, it's a business where having one job is never enough. You have to have five, six, you know, whatever. And so everything stopped. And for the first time in like 15 years, I had nothing to do. Yes. And I was like,

Well, at first I was like super bummed out and then I got way too comfortable. I was in sweatpants and flannel and Ugg boots and drinking wine every night and watching TV. I kind of like started to like it. Oh my God. It got to a point where my ex and I were watching a movie like every night. We're going to the grocery store. We're just like sampling different candies. Yeah.

I was like, let's see what Twizzler's doing with this cream-filled flavor here. Yeah. Rolos. Well, and it was like the... I mean, obviously, I would never want to go back to that time, but there was no FOMO or whatever. Right. You know what I mean? Because it wasn't like there were other comics...

out there doing a bunch of stuff and you're feeling like you're lugging behind. It was like an equalizer. Like, we're all at home. We're all can't really do anything. And so you didn't feel like you were in this rat race that is like, because, you know, it's comics. You're always kind of like, oh, I gotta be doing more. Right.

Right. You feel guilty. Isn't that crazy? I still can't believe we lived through that shit. I know. I know it's like been said to death, but I think about it. I'm like, we lived through... That's insane that we just shut down as a country. Somebody said it well. They said it's the only time in hundreds of years that the whole world had the same problem at once. The whole world had the same problem at the same time. That's not true. Kanye West. But no. No, it's crazy. We all...

We all were just stuck. We all were at home. We were all in, like, a state of just no movement for a long fucking time. Like, I also think, like, man, Zoom cashed in. Skype really. Oh, my gosh. That could have been Skype. Yeah. That could have been Skype. Yeah. The plastic dividers cashed in. Like, the heater, outdoor heater for restaurants. A lot of people cleaned up. Also...

If you're a therapist, your life just got so much better. Oh, I was just like, oh yeah. Zoom therapy. Every therapist is like, yeah, I live in Miami now. It's all remote. I just, you know. Yeah, the mask people. Yeah, a lot of people are still Zooming. Yeah. Yeah. I do it still. Yeah, we do our radio show. I just do it. Oh, really? Whoa. Well, you know, you're with a big company, Netflix, you know, for your radio show. So they can just Zoom it in where it looks pretty good, actually. Yeah. Right. On the show. But sometimes, comics, a lot of at-home setup can be rough. Right. But like,

Yeah, I mean, I do another podcast with a football player, Julian Edelman, and we Zoom in all our guests because they're all football players or famous people who don't want to come to the fucking studio, whether in LA or something. But it actually looks pretty good because it's a company. If you get legit engineers on that, it can work. Yeah, we have an awesome producer, so everyone sounds...

You're like, you don't miss being in the studio. But it allows Tom and I to go on the road and do all the stuff we're doing. Do you do episodes from the road? Yeah. Huge. Doing it this week from out here. Just my little home setup. You know, headphones with the...

mic attached to it. You never get the... I mean, sometimes. Certain hotels, but... Tom is such a chill, great dude. We love Tom Papa here. I look for a flaw with him. I can't find it. There's gotta be something, guys. He must have killed a kid or something. Ran over somebody and he hid the body. He was great when he did this show, too. And...

Yeah, he's one of those dudes, every time I see him at the cellar, I'm just like excited. He's got that like... Because you know what? I think part of it is that he's an older guy who still drinks. Yeah, that's nice. So I think that's part of it. He's got his like little round hat on. Oh, yeah. He loves wearing that New York. He's got a martini. And I'm just like...

I'm like, there's something about this energy that's almost at a place in time. Yeah. Like you expect him to be slapping a secretary's ass while he does it. I'm like, this shouldn't be around anymore. He's just enjoying life. Yeah. He's a great guy. He's a good advice guy too. I call him sometimes when I need a certain life advice. He's always got good nuggets of wisdom. Oh yeah. Smart guy. And he's been through it. Yeah. And he's got a couple of kids. Two kids. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. He's a good egg. Yeah. I wish he was my dad. That's what this all boils down to. His last name is Papa. Yeah. Wow. Holy shit. Everybody's Papa. You blow up my mind. He was the first big guy ever opened for, too. So that was scary. Yeah.

He murders. Like, people don't give him his due for how he kills. He's very respected. I hope so. But, you know, I know you mean, like, there's a lot of comics we see just rip a room apart. We're like, that person should be rich. Yes. You know? Yes. But, like, Tom is very respected. He does very well. But, you know, we don't mean to say that at all. But, like...

We see so many people, and I'm sure it's the same with actors or musicians, where you see someone just tear a room to shreds. And you're like, more people should know this name. Yes. And much like you, he has this positive light about him. Sometimes you go to the cellar and you're like, that guy's there. All right, he's going to tear me to pieces. He's going to shit on me. Ball busting is very common. Yeah. Which has its place. But when you see Tom or you, it's like, hey, let's hug it out. How about those...

How about those new potbellies? We do a segment on here that we don't do enough. I'll do a toast. It is my toast. To people who are not a lot. Yeah. A lot of people are a lot. They're weighty. Like energy vampires. They're brooding. Yeah. They kind of, they just suck from you at all times. Their energy sucks. Yeah. And if you're struggling, I'm not saying don't tell someone. I'm not saying don't confide. But there's people whose whole personality is that. Oh.

And then there's people like Tom who every time you see them, you're just like, this dude's just fucking fun. Yeah, it's like a light. A lightness. There's a light. Yeah, there's something. Exactly. And you guys do a show together. So it's like there's something about that that's like really. I mean, shout out to people who fucking bring that light. Shout out. A toast to those people. Do we still raise the roof? I don't know. Let's raise that shit. We're bringing it back.

Never went away from me. I'm always raising them. You're positive, I feel like. Yeah, but I think it's just a natural demeanor for me. I don't know where it comes from. But do you go home and just shoot a pillow? No, I think at home I'm more just chill. I'm not like out of charge. Are you edibles, anything? No, not really, no. I don't know. I know I'm very lucky to have this, but I genuinely wake up pleasant.

and happy. Wow, that's nice. And I know not everyone is lucky to have that. Chemically, people are just built different ways. And not to say that I don't wake up being moody or bad days, but I would say my norm is pretty pleasant. Don't look at Twitter. Yeah, right. Do you still have social media for the most part? I mean, I have to be on there for work and touring and stuff. But you don't linger, though.

Don't linger. I don't. I try not to read a lot of comments. Yeah. Good and bad. Yeah. Because you want to see the good, but if you are going to see the good, you're going to see the bad. Oh, yeah. So, I just kind of. I'll go through some. Like, if someone, like, you know, came to a show, I'll be like, oh, thanks so much. So, I don't, like, ignore everything, but I don't dwell on the comments and stuff. Just because I do want to be happy. Yeah.

You know, I do want to genuinely enjoy my life. I don't want my entire life to be wrapped up in this business and what people think of me. Here, here. It's not... It ain't gonna end well. I don't want... Yeah, I don't want my value as a person to be...

be dependent on what people think of me. Oh, boy, that's good advice right there. I should take a lot of that advice. Because what goes up must come down. You got that right. People are going to like you. Some people will like you, and then other people will hate you just looking at you for no reason. That's just the world we're in now. Yeah, I know. And you can't do anything about it, so why seek out that?

I think for me, I'm like, why? Why? What did I do to that? You just start racking your brain. Then you have so many insecure thoughts that it kind of starts validating shit that you've thought. Then you go down a whole spiral. I just think it's a slippery slope. It's like, obviously, as comics, we love to hear laughter. We love to hear praise as part of our job. But I just don't want to hang my hat on all of that stuff. Very mature. Good and bad. That's smart.

Yeah. I mean, yeah, it's the same mentality with a bad show. I mean, you're not as good as the, as the best said, you're not as bad as the worst. You got to kind of have to keep in a safe middle area. Yeah. But yeah, the comments are right there. Yeah. You really have to like, it's like right there. It's brutal sometimes. I mean, you know, I've,

Been doing this since 2010, so I've been called every name in the book. You get kind of used to it. But, you know, what matters is you do these live shows and the people that come seem to have a really good time. They're laughing. They feel good. You're like, that's what matters is that stuff. And that's reality. Yeah, that's right in front of you. You're seeing that it is real and it exists. Comments on the internet. Yeah. That's a whole other...

Comments are a lot of people that are literally like you're in a club and they're opening the door and being like, fuck you. Yeah, exactly. That's not one of your people. Exactly. That's just a person who's peeking in. Yeah. I mean, I get like, like if every now and then if I like tweet something that happens to get like a lot of, like you get a joke and it gets a lot of views or comments. I start having heart palpitations. I don't want that kind of,

attention you know what I mean I'm just like I'm like even if it's like a funny joke oh god I just thought I was tweeting something like no one was gonna pay attention I feel so similar to you guys where it's like we're entertainers we're trying to get the laugh we're trying to unify a room of people and you're just laughing yeah and I

I had a thing a few weeks ago where someone, I'm in the Omaha Funny Bone, someone screamed out, free Palestine. After a Jeffrey Epstein joke, and I'm like, all right, let's investigate this. I'm just having fun with a person, just being silly with a person. It becomes a thing. I post it because it's a funny clip. It starts getting picked up by the Jerusalem Post. Oh, really? All these legitimate...

news sites are picking up then start people start coming at me hard like this guy this guy is pro-apartheid I'm like watch the video I don't say that at any point of the video but people are really but then the guy saying I'm pro-apartheid gets a ton of repost and I'm like

I didn't say shit about that. I was literally making fun of someone. Wow. I literally just said, do you think the Omaha Funny Bone is the place for your protest? I'm literally just being silly with the person. How do you even get to apartheid? How do they even connect that? She yells out, how do you feel at apartheid? I said, how do you feel about fucking up my show? Oh, yeah. That's not even... Jesus Christ. I'm just trying to... I'm like, literally, it's a live performance that I'm trying to keep funny because the crowd is uncomfortable. Right. Yes.

Wow. But that's my point is like you can't give them that. No, no, no. Because that person, so much of the internet is people not even doing their research and just attacking. Yeah. That person clearly didn't watch the clip. Right. That's the person just attacking me. And they want the attack. They don't actually want reality or justice or rationality. And if you're like, I never said that, they don't listen. Yeah.

Nuance doesn't get retweets. No. Or headlines. Nuance doesn't work on social media in general. Yes. It's not the place for that. So, I don't know. I just try to make people laugh at my live shows and put up silly videos and tell stories. That's how I feel. That's the lane that I know. Totally. It's a good lane. Yeah. It makes people happy. I try to put out that positivity message.

And hope that it makes people feel good. And that's the only thing I can really focus on. Yeah. Yeah, I hear you. It's just... It's sad because sometimes people will write a mean thing and I'll like it. And they'll be like, oh, shit. I didn't know you would see this. And you're like...

What are you doing? Like, so you just caved instantly? So you don't even mean it? Like, that's even weirder. You're like, stick to it. Yeah, I'd rather you hate me. I hate you. Call me a piece of shit. Mean it. But I think I'm so weak-minded. You know, that old Chris Rock joke where he's getting pulled over and the cop's like, you stole this car. He's like, damn, maybe I did. That's how I feel. I'm like, you're a...

a bigot. I'm like, maybe I am, you know? And you start thinking, but you're like, what the fuck am I listening to this guy in Cleveland for? Yeah, but you hate that guy. He's not only a piece of shit, he's spineless. Yeah, yeah. I know. The picture of him is his profile is just like a handgun or something. And you're like, Jesus Christ. Always a rifle or something. An AK-47. Yeah. The point of the story is, follow us all along

social media. And leave a comment. Yes, we'll read them. All of them. The new special is on Netflix. Good fortune. Good fortune. Oh, yeah. Check it out. Your stuff's great. It really is hilarious. And Sweet and Salty is a great special. Check that out, too. Check out the other stuff. It's on there as well. You're on the road. Yeah, I'm doing some club dates. Yeah, plug some dates. They're not all up there. You're rebuilding. I'm doing Huntsville, Alabama.

Nice. Club, Ontario, California, Oxnard, California, San Jose, and Irvine. All the California clubs. Those are fun rooms. I did not do well in San Jose. Oh, yeah? I'm doing like working it out, like good material kind of stuff. It was a lot of, they were coming from that big jazz fest all them old days, so they were just laying there like. Ah, yeah.

They were jazzed out. They were jazzed out. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Comic, or comic, audiences are so savvy now to comedy. Like, if you go, I'm working out, they go, oh, cool. Yeah. This is interesting. The crowd is so sophisticated now. Yes. Well, I like building stuff, you know, in these clubs and them seeing the progress that you make when you come back around. Oh, yeah. But, yeah, I'm just...

I'm announcing a whole new tour that will start the end of January and I'll be going everywhere again. Nice. It'll be busy. All right. Well, go see Fortune on the Road. Killer act.

New stuff. Thanks for coming in. Thanks for having me. Thanks for the whiskey there, JMO. Cheers, everybody. Mark, what do you got? You plugging some dudes? Oh, yeah. I'm at the Wilbur in Boston. I'm at the Joy. I'm at the College Street Music Hall in New Haven. The Fillmore in Philly. We added a show. Buffalo. Buffalo.

Cobbs in San Francisco. Zany's in Nashville. All kinds of fun. They're going to Hawaii. Who knew? So, yeah. Fun stuff. Come on out. MarkNormanComedy.com and get Bodega Cat. BodegaCat.com. I got Kansas City, Tacoma, Spokane on New Year's, and then theater tour in January. Please come out. New Orleans, Austin, Dallas, Tulsa, St. Louis, Vegas, Vancouver, Seattle, Portland, Salt Lake, New York.

Huntington, New York, AC, Royal Oak, Michigan, Minneapolis, Madison, Milwaukee, New Haven, Boston, Miami, Orlando, Jacksonville, Atlanta, Charleston, North Carolina and Durham, Charlottesville, Norfolk, DC, Wilkes Bar and Port Chester, samorell.com slash shows. Dang. Somebody's been busy. Oh yeah, somebody's single. Ha ha ha ha.

I'm very unhappy. BodegaCatWhiskey.com Great having you here. Thanks for having me, guys. I appreciate it. Always a pleasure. It was nice drinking with you. It was awesome. Anything, JMO?

I got a foot in my rib cage. Oh, yeah. Pregnant. Go see the birth. Oh, yeah. She's putting it on Zoom. Yeah, I don't know when this comes out. I usually do like Greenwich Village Comedy Club or Broadway, but I'm going to definitely have to take a pregnancy leave at some point. Yeah. You better get some rest. All right. That'll be fun, too. All right. Well, I mean, Ali Wong, Christina P, Schumer, they've all done the pregnancy shows. All right. Well, that'll do it, I think. You're great. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Sunday's the day for my next thing.

And Norman's talking shit again, poked out in the same way. Up on the roof like a con in Dangerous. I'm out to lunch here in New Orleans. This woman does not remember her.