Neighborhood Menty B's
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So are we supposed to start the podcast? Ready? One, two, three. It is the star of all podcasting at her advanced age, banging out clap after clap after clap. Pumps, what have you had it with? What I've had it with is when you get a package and you fill out when you buy it, leave it at my house. You pre-sign, leave it at my house, leave it at my house, leave it at my house.

And then you get like a note on your door that says it's at the shipping facility. And it's like, that can't fucking be right because I went through extreme lengths not to have this at the shipping facility. And you have to go and it's a big clusterfuck, circle jerk of people waiting in line. They can't find their tags. And I've just decided there's nothing that could be delivered to me that I would want to sign forever. And I don't know why we just can't put that in a blanket statement like,

Always leave it at my house. Don't ever make me go pick it up. Well, I think it's in response to these porch pirates. I know, but I'll assume the risk. If somebody steals it, that's on me. Let me ask you this. Do you think it's possible that...

Maybe you didn't fill out the form correctly. No, I don't think that's possible because that's what I originally thought. And I went back and looked because I was like, I've ordered two things from these people and I want to go in and make sure that they know to leave it at the house. And it was not me, which normally it would be me. Right. But this particular instance, it was not me.

Yeah, you know, I don't like that either. I hate it. Because then I have an item pending right now. Did you have to go pick it up? Yes. It's the worst. It's the worst because then it just defeats the whole order by mail thing. That's what I was going to say. It's just like the whole reason I ordered it online is so I don't have to go fight for it somewhere. Right. And now I'm having to go fight for it somewhere after I told you not to.

to just require my signature. You're tired of fighting. I'm tired of fighting over these packages. Just leave them. She's losing her fight, listener. Losing my fight. Tom's just losing her fight. Losing the fight. So what are you doing with the post-it note stickers at the pickup place? Are you picking the stuff up or are you just letting it die there? No, I'll pick it up. I've picked it up.

I mean. You went and fought it. I went and fought it. You won. I didn't want to. And, but I go like if it opens at 7 a.m., I am in line at 659. I'm like, I'm first one there. So I can be first. So you're punctual. I'm hyper punctual when it's something like that because I don't want to wait in line. Interesting. Let me tell you what I've had it with. What have you had it with? And this is petty, but that's what this show is. I was going to say, what else is new? I've had it with people calling breakfast brekkie. Okay.

heard that recently. Stop. Quit putting on your Instagram. Brekkie in bed, going to Brekkie with my boo. Bae and I going to Brekkie. Put a sock in it. Quit making shit up. It's breakfast. It's always been breakfast. Quit calling it Brekkie. I've had it. Yeah. Second one is quit calling reservations resis. Oh, I hadn't heard that. That's awful. I had it.

Had it. Got a resi for me and boo. Got a resi for me and bae. Making Valentine resis. Shut up. I don't want to hear it. I've had it. Quit making up cute words for your performative Instagram post. Put a sock in it. I've had it. No, I totally agree with you. That's a great had it. I don't think it's petty at all. Do you want me to make a resi for Brecky?

Absolutely not. Maybe we should make a resi for Brekkie for Valentine's Day. Fucking had it. Had it. I've had to drive through. Stop. Stop with all the bullshit. Stop with it. We're already battling so much. We've already established Pumps is tired of fighting. I'm tired of fighting it. We're already fighting the journeys. We're already fighting the manifesting. We're fighting gender reveal parties. Stop, for the love of God.

Calling breakfast brekkie. You know what it is? Calling breakfast brekkie is like the McKinley, you know, crazy spelling for a little kid. It's just don't do that. Don't cute it up. It's the first meal of the day. It's fucking breakfast. Quit trying to make it cute. I think everybody tries to cute everything up. I really do. I think it's an epidemic of trying to cute stuff up. And that's just... I want to opt out. Yeah.

I want to opt out. Put me in the not cute pile. Just put me there. Leave me there. I want to opt out of all of this brekkie and resis. I've had it. I had to ask what two words were recently. Riz. I was like, somebody said, he has no riz. And I was like, what's riz? Charisma. Then soon after that, I saw an article that said, if you have to ask what riz is, you clearly don't have any. And then cap.

Like I was texting someone and I was like, Cap was referred to twice. And I finally texted back and I was like, what does Cap mean? I'm lost. So some of that is like, like in rap music, you know, slinging. I don't have issue with Riz or Cap.

What I have issue with are the white girls making their resis for Brekkie and like using like the cursive font on their Instagram stories or even maybe like saying, I'm just got a resi for Brekkie with my boo. And it's like that. I just it's fingernails down a chalkboard. I've had it. Jen, I've got another one for you. They're saying Minty B.

For mental breakdown. No post. Unless he just had a mentee bee. That's a cute app that just... You don't need to cute that up. You can't cute that up. Mentee bee? How are they spelling that? Mentee. M-E-N-T-E-Y.

I've never heard of such a thing. That's just, you know what? These are the same people that are making resis for Brekkies. Yeah. And you know what? I would probably have a minty bee if I made a resi for Brekkie. Well, no shit. I would be the queen of the minty bee. Yeah. I mean. Minty bee? Anybody who calls a mental breakdown a minty bee, they've never had a mental breakdown. 100% true. You can't cute up a mental breakdown. And you're not thinking about rebranding it or relabeling it.

Hence, it's a mental breakdown. I fucking had it. These people need to pull themselves together and go fight at the FedEx station like a normal person. That's right. Welcome to I've Had It. I'm Jennifer. I'm Angie. She's the star of our show. She's a great legal mind. She's the oldest woman in podcasting. Kylie, how are you? I'm good. Much younger than pumps. Me too. Me too. Seth, are you here today? I'm here.

Yes, and I'm a fresh 27 years old. He's the youngest. Oh, but what we're looking for here is, are you younger than pups? Oh, absolutely. Great. Kylie, what do you have for us from the World Wide Web? I actually have a submission on our website from a listener named Anna. An email? Yes, they sent an email. I like this. They wrote, here to beat a dead horse. Love it.

I've had it with other moms. Just saw a post in a mom group of a woman asking in which position they should try for baby number three because they have two girls and hubby really wants a boy and they don't want to have gender disappointment again. One, do you think their daughters know they're a disappointment to their parents? If not, at what age will they tell them that? Two, should I tell this moron to stick to anal because I don't think they should continue to reproduce? Three...

Stop telling people when you're trying. Just fuck the regular way and make your baby. I really have more to say, but I'll stop myself. The dead open casket funeral horse is now beaten. Once it is buried, I will probably want to exhume the carcass, beat it again, then cremate it and possibly beat it one more time for good measure. Because these people never stop. I can beat this shit all day long. What's her name? Anna. Anna, I can drag out that fucking dead horse, cremate it. I don't give a fuck. I'll beat the ashes.

Let's just tee this up. Here we are again with the gender disappointment. I can't even handle it. I can't handle it. This is the problem with these people. When you have a child, that child is your child temporarily. Then it becomes an adult. And almost from the time it's born,

for sure around three to four months, they have their own will and their own desires and they are their own person. And all you did is Olivia, one of our previous callers would say is raw dog. You're going to get the genitals are going to come out one of two ways.

And then after that, they could decide they maybe don't like that gender or they don't feel themselves in that gender. But to make the gender of your child all about you, I've had it. I've had it too. And again, we're going back to she's publicizing it. She's telling everyone in her group me.

Quit telling everybody your fuck schedule. I mean, seriously. Quit talking about your fuck around schedule. No, nobody cares. Yeah, nobody. Like, well, we're trying. Somebody in a previous episode, that was somebody's hat. Yeah, they've had it. And it's true. Tell us after. And then we as people need to quit asking people, are you going to have kids? Yes. Yes.

I agree. We have to stop. And I'm guilty of it. So I'm really going to make an effort. We have to stop asking people if they're going to have kids and quit perpetuating this narrative that this is the destiny as a member of our species, wedding, breeding, divorce. Right.

You know what? You know what? Instead of asking people the second question, are you going to get married? And then that's the first one. And then the second one, are you going to have kids? We can just start jumping to the third one. Are y'all getting divorced? So when do you think you're going to get a divorce? You close? You thinking about it? Oh my gosh. That's the best thing I've ever heard. Let's start.

Let's start doing that. Stop asking people when they're having kids and just jump to, so when are you guys getting divorced? You think you'll bang out another two to three years? Maybe the seven year itch? You think that'll do it? So are you going to have kids before or after you get a divorce? Yeah.

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All right, listener, today, back by popular demand, it's time to read the fuckery that is going on on the neighborhood apps. One of my favorite things. I'm going to start us off. We're going to do dramatic readings of what the general public is posting as what's going on in their neighborhoods. This is basically a public service. Absolutely. Okay. Harry Post. The subject is suspected disturbing of the peace.

I was out for my evening walk because of my constipation condition. Just don't say that. Because my doctor said it would help me pass stuff through better. And I saw this mullet man driving a 4x4. I thought it was pretty cool, so I waved at him and gave him a thumbs up. But to my surprise, he yelled, I eat ass. So that was alarming. Yeah.

And then some kid in the back of the truck rolled his window down and showed me his butthole. I think this type of behavior is completely lewd and unacceptable for our neighborhood. Has anyone else seen these hoodlums around? I've reported this information to the police. Here's what I want to know, Harry. Did you report about your constipation to the police? What would she clue to?

Harry, did you start off your police report with, listen, I'm really constipated. Right. So I go out every evening for my evening constitution. Is that how you started it off? Right. In your report. But then, you know, you see a person in a four by four with a mullet.

I immediately know that you're probably going to get flipped off. Oh, well, for sure. Something, something is going to happen. I mean, you know, the combination of the two. Right. You know, there's some redneck shit going on. Well, 100%. Anyway, he's reported it to the police. So the mullet, redneck and the four by four. Watch out. This one is titled A Mother in Need.

Yeah.

and will allow mother of baby to nap on her couch, drink a cup of coffee while quietly reading a magazine, or watch a favorite show while enjoying a glass of wine. Wine and coffee will be provided. Husband of mother of two agrees to offer a monetary compensation to mother of baby if this time spent holding said baby stops mother of two from wanting and asking for another baby of her own.

These people are fucking psycho. Psychotic. First of all, who is going to let somebody that puts that on the internet hold their baby? Yeah. Like, you know what? Sounds good. Hey, that sounds great. I just had a baby. Fucking cries all the time. Love for you and your husband to come over and hang out with me. Right.

Fucking psychos. Serve me drinks that you can roofie? No, thank you. Here's the deal. Here's what I get with a lot of these people. You have this idea, like she wants to have another baby. Her husband's probably like, no, we can't afford it. And you're kind of fucking crazy and I don't want to triple down. I might have a minty bee anytime. Yeah. So he's like, no. And she's like, well, if I could just hold a baby. He's like, okay, maybe that's a great idea. Maybe we could find a baby for you. Well, I don't know any babies.

They together collectively wrote that out and came up with the terms of it and posted it on the World Wide Web. Nobody talked the other one out of it.

Which we have experience with. Somebody's got to make better decisions. Somebody has got to be the voice of reason to say, why don't we type it up and then not click publish? Why don't we just talk about it? Why don't we do that? Why don't we talk about it? You know, it's like you and I love to have a fantasy ask you where we're chewing somebody out in our mind, but then we don't call the person and do it. That's what these people need to do. They're publishing it to strangers. Yeah. Here's one.

Mouse in a hot pink sweater. This is a serious post, no matter how ridiculous it is about to send. Believe me, I am shaking my head right now. If anyone happens to see a common field mouse run by in a hot pink sweater, please disregard. My daughter thought it was smart to save a mouse from our cats today and proceeded to name it Princess Karen and put it in a hot pink sweater.

It then jumped after it was put in said sweater and escaped. No, we don't want it back. No, it's not a pet. I was just giving everyone in the neighborhood a heads up if they happen to come across a mouse in a hot pink sweater.

Why wouldn't you just act like you didn't know anything about it and not just let everybody know? She's just got to, you know what this person does? I bet this person sends out the Christmas newsletter. 100%. That's a newsletter. Bet you there's a picture attached to that newsletter. Princess Karen, the mouse in the hot pink sweater. If I had a daughter and she named a mouse Karen, we would immediately have to go see a child shrink.

Okay, I can't get past... It's a slippery slope. The random... The cat, they saved a mouse, which means it might have diseases or lice. Ugh! I'm just so repulsed by that whole thing. It was in their house. I mean, the little girl, like the animal...

I mean, she was not, she made it a little sweater. That's the least egregious part. No, I think the least egregious part is letting your kid play with the mouse that you buy at a pet store. Some people have pet mouses. I know, but they come from pet stores. This is like a rando they brought in with the cat. I doubt it's got some fucking, you're acting like a crazy person right now. You need to pull yourself together. No, I just think that's the weird part. Pull yourself together, Pumps. It's not like some rat. All right, go on. Okay, this one is titled...

Large police presence. And it's important to note that presence is spelled P-R-E-S-E-N-T-S. When you start spelling it, I thought no. Like the gift. Okay. Anybody know what's going on on Cedar near Highway 61? Evidently, there is a large police presence, spelled the same way, with unmarked and marked police cars. Someone responds, maybe it's someone's birthday. Okay.

And then they respond, doubt it. One car was blocking our driveway. My wife had to leave. And when he rolled the window down, I saw his badge. The same person responded again and said, maybe a surprise party then? Shanking that poor man's chain. Completely lost on the poster.

You know, that's the thing with people that aren't clever. Clever people can just sit and troll them for hours. For hours. And they don't know. They're completely unaware. It's like those guys that go to the Trump rallies and just start questioning. Within like two questions deep, they've got them in a headlock. They don't ever know. They never know. They never know. Next up, the title is Suspicious Person Walking Street. Oh, okay.

I've seen a suspicious person now numerous times in the neighborhood, age mid-50s and white, often seen walking a dog at all times of the day. He appears to live in the neighborhood and drives a luxury car, but never seems to go to work. Not sure how this person affords to do this, hence given the strange behavior. I've reported him to the IRS. Yes.

They thanked me for my report and promised to give him a gentle audit for the next three years. Stay vigilant! Exclamation point. Person 1. Hair brown. Top vineyard vines. Bottom khakis. Shoes Johnston Murphy. Age 50. Sex male. Race white.

This is a classic case of needs more to do. This is a classic case of a white person. Right. I mean, this person, I would strangle that bitch if she called the IRS on me. Why does she give a fuck what he does? This is...

Insanity. Insanity. He walks his dog all the time, drives a luxury car. Maybe he's fucking retired. Crazy person. Yeah. Independently wealthy. Maybe he works from home. I mean, mind your own fucking business. Maybe he has a trust fund that could choke a bull. You know? Maybe he has a sugar mama. Yeah. I mean, leave him alone for fuck's sake. Okay, this one posted, has anybody else had someone put...

A spilled can of beans in their mailbox? What does this mean? Is this gang related? It's a gang sign. Okay, here we go. Early Amber Alerts is the subject.

Did everyone else receive an Amber Alert this morning before sunup at 6.15 a.m. about a concern out of Irving, Texas? Does anyone know who can be contacted to respectfully ask about the possibility that in the future such sleep-arousing alerts be sent out at a later hour? That is the height of entitlement right there. I'm not worried about your kid being snatched because it might interfere with my beauty sleep.

I mean...

What a bitch. She posted it on the internet. Like this is a thought, you know, like you're tired. God, Amber Alert, you know, and we all get them. All get them. Yeah. But, you know, they could absolutely make a difference. They could save someone's life. Absolutely. And this fucking person, it's okay to have a moment where you're like, God, I'm so sick of my phone going off. Right. Amber Alert woke me up. But she posted it on the internet. She took the time and the effort to type it out on her computer. Yeah.

posted it. All right, Jenny posted, anyone skilled in Photoshop? I'm looking to give my daughter-in-law a special surprise for her wedding anniversary by slimming her down in her wedding photos. Any recommendations? And that is why daughter-in-laws hate their mother-in-laws right there. That is exactly. Case in point. Okay, here's one from the Nextdoor app. Please don't defecate along our trails.

And I am talking about humans. To the female jogger, unfortunately, I doubt she will ever read this, though, that defecated two piles next to my fence gate door to the trail along Belmont Ridge Road behind my house at 540 a.m. this morning. I cleaned your mess up. And I suggest you see a doctor.

You are sick in multiple ways. It took two thick COVID masks sprayed with cologne and goggles to endure the stink and keep the flies from flying into my face.

while trying to clean up with a long shovel. And the fact you brought toilet paper with you suggests you have another issue and that you planned on defecating somewhere along the way and just leave it there. Lucky me to be at my breakfast table looking out towards my backyard and the beautiful section along that path we are all proud of, especially the knockout roses. Yeah.

Nice, crisp air coming in, about to start the day with a small meal. Then, what the, witnessing this as it occurred, what a nice start to the day. That was sarcasm and the breakfast was skipped, understandably, at this point. When I came out the back door and yelled really loudly, really? Really?

which interrupted your proud moment. You scurried pretty fast like a scared cat, but left some unused toilet paper along the trail during your hasty getaway.

I guess that's why you ran back a few feet to pick up some of the toilet paper to use somewhere else. Maybe even ruin somebody else's morning at their breakfast table too and leaving your disgusting trash on the ground there as well. The only thing that even slightly satisfying about this episode is knowing that you had to run at least several yards with a dirty butt, which likely ruined your morning jog.

In here, I thought we only had a problem with people leaving their dog's poop along the trail. By the way, I got a decent look at your face despite the sun visor you were wearing. Just try passing by next time. No squatting. And if I see you, I will just say hi. I have to say, I'm kind of with the author. I mean, bitch is pooping on a trail? Okay, but here's the deal. You...

Sometimes have explosive diarrhea. Put yourself in the jogger's shoes. You have had some times. No, I have, but it's premeditated. She brought the toilet paper with her. And if she brought the toilet paper, why didn't she bring a sack? A poop bag? A poop bag. You had the decency to carry your shit around for 20 miles in a styrofoam cup. I did. Let me think about this. Wasn't there a time that we were at the park with our kids and one of our kids just kind of like shit behind a tree?

I'm sure that happened. I mean, I have no specific recall of that, but I know other places that my kids like just dropped it. So let me tell you a story about Josh. So after his first rehab stint, he decided he was going to jog and he decides he's going to be like, it's like Forrest fucking Gump. I mean, he ran and ran and ran. He'd go like two on two big jogs a day.

So I'm sitting in the front, like study of my old house with the baby and the baby's one of those bouncing things. And Josh had been Forrest Gump-ing, right? So all of a sudden the door opens and he runs through the house as fast as he can. He doesn't even close the door and it's a huge ruckus, right? And so I'm like, what's going on? But he ran by so fast, the scent was somewhat delayed. Yeah.

So about two to three seconds later, I get this waft of shit. And I'm like, what's going on? He is standing in the shower with his jogging clothes on, beginning, and it's running, beginning to take off his shoes. And he's screaming, go get a trash bag. Go get a trash bag. So he was running. And he took his shit in that nice green park in my fucking neighborhood.

He tried to wipe his ass with a leaf. Then he just had to pull his pants up. Oh, my gosh. You know someone saw him. He's filled up his shoes. It's down his leg. Oh, my gosh. But back to this one. I do think it's premeditated. I wonder if there's more to the story.

If she's got like a kink that she likes to poop in public. Well, I mean, according to this author here, she says you are sick in multiple ways. No doubt about that. I think she's talking about gastrointestinally. Yes. And biointestinal.

I think she's the saying that she had a minty bee. She had a minty bee. And ruined her brekkie. She ruined her brekkie. She was not happy when she skipped, obviously. This, she ruined her brekkie. She ruined her brekkie. Okay. Here's the deal. At the end of the thing, she says she would say hi to the lady. She would just say hi. I'd be like, you took a shit outside my gate and I had to pick it up. It was fucking gross.

There's no question, but I think she kind of starts, you can tell on the post, she kind of gets it off her chest. Yeah. And then she's like, okay. And then she's kind of calmed down towards the tail end. She's a nicer person than me. Not calmed down enough to not hit publish though. Right. That's right. Not that she took it over the finish line, which I'm kind of glad she did. I kind of did. It's good for us. Yeah. Okay. This one is titled disrespecting vegan radius.

Last night around 18:30 p.m. we spotted our neighbors in their yard barbecuing what looked like raw flesh. We are vegan. We have had in-depth discussions with our neighbors about our veganism and the importance of a vegan community and the importance of living in a meat-free radius. Not only was it disturbing to watch, but the scent wafted into our house minutes after.

I'll tell you how I'd respond to it. I know exactly how I would respond. I want to live in a nut-free radius. I want to live in a narcissistic-free radius. I want to live in a radius free of breathtaking entitlement.

That's what I want to live in. So you can take your fucking vegan tofu and cram it up your goddamn ass because I'm going to grill my steak. If you want to be a vegan, fine. Swing for the fences. Shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up. The fact that not only is she vegan, she's discussed her veganism with her neighbors, which you know they're like bored to fucking tears over there. Let me ask you guys this. Is this how y'all feel about me with pickleball? A hundred percent. Exactly. Exactly.

Pumps wants to live in a pickleball free radius. Free radius for me. I'm sorry. I was just sitting there doing an inventory, like a self inventory. Like, do I have this in me? And I was like, Oh yeah, I sure do. Sure. Fucking do sis. You sure do. All right, here we go. Somebody posed fireworks or gunshots. Was that fireworks or gunshots that just went off? Another neighbor responds. I was shooting my gun at the fireworks. Okay. Okay.

Here's one that somebody posted in their neighborhood app. In Willow Bend on Lauderdale Drive, there is a Siamese looking cat that is roaming day and night and climbing up my screen cage and walking up.

It's so good. I got to try to get it out seriously. You don't even know what's so funny about it yet. Listener, just wait for it. Okay. A Siamese looking cat that is roaming day and night and climbing up my screen cage and walking on my labia. What? That cannot be right. Please keep your cats under control or we will have...

Please keep your cats under control or we will need to have animal control come for it. So I think probably what she meant to post, and I can lean into my interior design degree for this, is lanai, which in Hawaii means patio and or porch. My thinking is that she inadvertently wrote labia in.

And I'm so grateful. So glad she did. Because this goddamn Siamese cat is roaming day and night and climbing her screen cage and walking on her labia for fuck's sake. Pussy on pussy. My cheeks literally hurt. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. It's so good. Here's the deal. Wouldn't you prove me that? Inject. Inject. Inject into your veins. Oh, my gosh. Like, I would take that down immediately. You know what? I think these are the kind of people. This is...

a needle in a haystack of shit they post all day. They've got, they're running their Facebook. They're running their next door app. They got their Instagram going. They got Twitter going. They got threads going. They're probably still on fucking Napster for God's sake. Right. MySpace, you know, they're doing all sorts of shit. Okay. This one is titled cat smells of cigarettes.

Tonight, my cat Simon came home reeking of cigarettes. I know he likes to wander the neighborhood visiting people, but my son and I are very sensitive to the smell of smoke, so would greatly appreciate it if you're a smoker and to not let him in your house. Thanks in advance. Someone then does a post, a follow-up post, and it's titled, Is This Your Cat? Is This Your Cat?

late last night i heard a strange sound coming from our kitchen area and thought someone could have snuck into my house i was shocked when i saw a black cat in our house smoking a cigarette please keep your cat off our property i'm very sensitive to smoke they then there's a picture of a black cat with a cigarette in its mouth that is fabulous that is a fabulous response

If I had more time, I think it'd be a great hobby just to get on the Nextdoor app and just fucking troll people. It really would. That would be a blast. That would be a blast. Maybe we should create like a burner account. A burner account. And we could just fuck with people. I think it would be so fun. Like when somebody's like, you know, making these crazy claims, you know, like I'm calling the police. I can help you right now. I'm with the police. Right. Customer service right here.

You know, one of our other next door episodes, somebody said white people called the police like it's customer service. Which is so true based on the evidence presented. Okay. This post was posted at the log cabin estates and neighborhood office.

And this woman posted, I was out walking my dog early this morning, admiring the beautiful sky and appreciating this great country. Then I realized how poorly Obama and Biden screwed our country. That's it.

You know, that somehow Obama and Biden can detract from nature. Right. Yeah. Well, and it was so good for that four years. Oh. I mean, it was so perfect during those four years. Four years of crazy. Yeah, because Trump was such a great ambassador to the earth. He's an ambassador to everything he touches. I mean, he is...

A crackerjack. How do you tell us you voted for Trump twice without telling us you voted for Trump twice? How do you tell us you're low IQ? All right, my last one is titled Urgent Alert. There is a black Jeep Cherokee that just drove down our dead-end street, turned around, and drove back out. And that's the whole post. Kristen then responds, and... It'd be so fun to fuck with that person right there. And then you could post...

really, what did the person look like? And just never really land the plane. Just ask her a ton of questions. What year do you think it was? What do you think the tire style was? I mean, just get this person really going. Do you have anything missing? Have you checked your flower bed? And then throw in, when's the last time you masturbated? Was the driver masturbating when he drove by? I saw that driver. He asked me if I wanted to have sex. Did he ask you?

People are just, I don't know if it's too much time on their hands. A combination of keyboard. It's keyboard courage. I mean, but there are a lot of things. Here's the thing with these apps, Facebook, this stuff. Sometimes they can be helpful. Right. But what happens is the craziness that our species has prior to the World Wide Web was

Wasn't on parade. Right now. It's just on parade. It's not that people have gotten crazier This shit remember the old show bewitched. Yeah in the neighbor gladys kravitz. That's where the whole thing came from This isn't new. It's just accessible And the information delivery of it is instantaneous And it's fantastic. It's fantastic Yeah

Let me ask you this. Let me ask you a follow-up question here. Okay. You decide you want to go on a walk. You're going to power walk, right? Right. Power walking in a neighborhood, I mean, it hits. There's nothing you can do here, but you have to bend over and do it right where you are. And you're probably about 10, 15 yards from somebody's gate. You don't have a bag. You don't have toilet paper. You do this big, giant blowout. And then you have to tuck and roll.

back home do you try to go back and bag your shit absolutely I would absolutely go back you'd go bag your shit for sure that I mean that's just inhumane to do to somebody else I think that's bad yeah what about you Kylie would you go back I think my shame would keep me away from it now I can't be seen twice do it no I would

Just take my poop scooper over there and just walk a shame in. He would. I mean, that's the least of the bad things that I've done in my life. That would be nothing. That would be the worst thing I've ever done. It would be the layup. That would be the layup of the apology tours I've been on. Seth, you got something I keep hearing you buzzing on. I found this guy who's doing a public service that I thought you would really enjoy. Okay. So Paul posts, Jehovah Witness alert for the Reed Park area around 13th and North May. Okay.

See, I appreciate that. That's a warning. That is good. That's a warning. That is. That's a good neighbor. Yeah, that's really, really helpful. All right, listener, here's the deal.

We started, Pabst and I always kind of wanted to be journalists. And so we thought everybody else is fucking saying shit that they aren't. And everybody else gets to be crazy. So we're fucking crazy now. So whenever we feel like on... Like. Whenever we feel like. Whenever we feel like it. Why am I giggling so bad today? Whenever we feel like it, we are going to post...

Here's the deal. I have to make pups close the show. Tell them all the stuff. You do it. We have a new YouTube. I did that right, didn't I, Kylie? A new YouTube feature. IHIP News with different, like, reoccurring. What is wrong with you? I don't know. I just have the giggles up my head.

Anyway, YouTube channel, IHIP News, Documentary Club, every Wednesday and other exclusive features on Patreon. Oh my God, she's a distraction right now. Send us your voice memos of what you've had it with to our I've Had It podcast Instagram, and we will see you next Tuesday or Thursday or both. Oh my God, what is wrong? I'll tell you what I've had it with.

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