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I've been looking at real estate in Fire Island. You know Fire Island? I feel like I hear about Fire Island in the same way I hear about like Provincetown on the Cape in that it's like there's a high population of gay people there. Oh, that's great. I wasn't looking there anyways. Oh. I wasn't looking there, yeah. Oh, you weren't? No. No? You just were bringing it up on your own accord? Yeah.
and i don't i don't think i'd be able to you don't think you'd be able to what i wouldn't be able to control myself okay oh yeah yeah well okay well what's in fire have you been to fire island before no never been i'm just looking at these zillow listings and oh my goodness the houses there are beautiful you use zillow in the same way that most people use like instagram or tick tock oh dude it's so fun because i can buy anything
I can have anything on Zillow. We showed you some listings on in Los Angeles. I'm sure there would be stuff out of your price range. And that's why I don't live in Los Angeles. There's like mansions in Los Angeles that go for like one hundred and fifty million dollars. They're just like pure marble. Rich people are weird. Rich people have weird taste. Yeah. And I think I'm like one of the few rich people that like gets it, you know.
Yeah? You think so? Yeah, yeah. I think I do. I think I relate to the common man. I mean, I sit in traffic. Okay. Well, we actually have a common man here on the podcast. He's about, what is it, 70% blue collar? Yeah, he is. Tucker, why don't you ask him some common man questions to see how he sits amongst the layperson? How'd the fishing go this year for you, Shlet? Yeah.
While he's thinking about that, what's your other question you're going to ask him? How many miles on your car since the last oil change? You know, he's probably just thinking hard about that. While he's thinking about that one, though, too, what else are you going to ask him? Are you more excited for turkey or deer season? Welcome to Chuckle Sandwich.
But like, I still hang with you guys. You know, that's the fun part. It's like I am like here with you and you're hanging out and we're we're having we're having fun together. We do a little podcast and like, yeah, I just feel like I'm still hip with it. You know? Yeah. Yeah.
And I'm like, I'm voting for Kamala too. You know, it's like when he when he shuts the podcast off, he stands up. A butler enters. How was your podcasting, sir? Takes off his hat, grabs some gel, slicks it back, takes off his fucking New York Yankee shirt. He's in a tux.
shows up to the gala he serves me a cigar already cigar in your mouth at all times dude yeah three girls so you get to pick from one of them for your date for the night which we've got a selection in from miami this time of year so oh you don't want them from miami you don't want them from we've got a selection in from kentucky this time no you don't want them from kentucky either you want them from like i
I don't know. You want them from like a place where the weather sucks. We've got a selection in from Seattle, Washington, sir. I was thinking more like Maine, like Kennebunkport. That has great weather. Kennebunkport? No, no. I mean, it's kind of okay, but then it gets real bad in the winter. Man, there's going to be some people who, some ladies who live in Kennebunkport who have a crush on you. They're going to be like...
This is my chance. This is my chance. The letters from Kennebunkport. Send a letter here if you're a hot dame from Kennebunkport, Maine. It'll be my P.O. box. I was thinking the same thing. It's going to be Tucker's P.O. box going up there. Emma's going to be like, what are you looking at? And he's like, nothing, nothing. Just the letters that I got. Bane mail.
Oh, man. Can't have bunked for it. I've been to Maine once. I went to Bar Harbor. It was a great time. Yeah, that's why I have my... It's the only other hat I wear. I don't know if you've ever noticed. It's a Bark Harbor shirt. Well, you've got the Terry Blacks one, though, too. That's true, but I stopped wearing it.
I left Texas. I actually left the hat there too because I wanted to forget all about that place. Yeah. As you're walking away from your apartment in Texas, you just like, you toss it on the ground. You throw a fucking Zippo on it with some gas and just walk into the distance. There's a lot of things I left behind in Texas. I left behind a lot of my happiness. OTK. OTK. Yeah.
A lot of your happiness got stuck in Texas? No, that's not true. That's not true at all. That was just like a joke, but I'm realizing it doesn't make sense. I'm super happy here. This is the best situation I've been in in a very long time. You're at your peak happiness right now. I got to say, dude...
since the last podcast it it arrived my new couch oh the lovesack the lovesack couch how is uh my largest purchase i've ever made and uh it is oh it's glorious yeah it's nice dude it's bigger it's like twice as big as my old couch it's it took me seven hours to build you had to build it
Well, okay. Because the way the lovesack couch works, I hope I'm not boring people talking about a fucking couch. No, they're getting up to the age where they need to worry about couches. Honestly, if I had to give one piece of advice to people out there in terms of buying a couch, if you can afford the initial hit of it, I would go into a lovesack couch. You've had it for like three days and you're already like, you've got to have this one. It's the best you can get. Well, you've got to listen to my logic here.
Because it's a sectional, you could get like, because mine's six pieces, you get two pieces of lovesack couch. And then you could add on to it as you get more space or as you get more funds to get a lovesack couch. But what's great about it is the things that are great about it is what took me so long to make it, put it together, is that every single piece of it
has like the the the cover for it is replaceable it's machine washable so when it came in um it was in about 17 different boxes that i had to walk up to my apartment and i had the amount of cardboard that i've had to get rid of over the last four or five days has been astronomical um
But I had to then take everything out and put the covers. I essentially had to upholster all of the pieces of the couch and then put it together. That means the couch can change colors whenever you want it to. Yeah, seriously. That's like hype. And you can have, you can fuck on it.
you can eat on it you can do you can spill shit on it and have no problem i'll just reupholster and the cover that i got is more bang for my buck because it's a reversible one on one side it's like a normal kind of like flat one and the other one it's like this kind of furry like a boucle a little honestly i think it's a it's it's actually here's the uh ted you better have that boucle out
Oh, so this is the one side of it. It's like this. That's more of a shag. That's more of a shag. I wouldn't say that's a book. And then this is the other side. It's like sort of a,
I see. And you didn't opt for the furry side of the couch? You got that on the inside right now? It's summer. It's summer. I can't be coming back from basketball with my friend Hassan and then sit on this furry couch. You know, it's going to be bad. It's going to be miserable. But I guess I'm very excited about the couch. You're going to feel this couch slap.
You're going to feel this. You know what? I am going to feel it. And I hope it holds a candle to the one I've got because, you know, that's a, that's a, that's a high bar. Everyone here sat on that couch. Everyone here has enjoyed that couch. We talk about that almost every single day. Yeah, it is. That wasn't, that wasn't an incredible couch. That couch is massive though.
That couch was four times as big as my original couch and is twice as big as my current couch. That is the biggest couch I've ever seen. You want to know something? It was funny you're talking about the sectional because like, yeah, you can add more pieces to it. My couch was too big for my current New York space. So I'm like removing pieces of it.
So I'll have like a smaller couch soon, which is great because it's still going to wait. I was there. It seemed like it fit. What are you trying to fit? It's kind of awkward. So like the left side, it extended into an area where there was a window and like I really wanted to be able to use the window, but the couch was in the way of it. And so I'm going to get rid of that that left L piece that kind of, you know, juts out.
I'm going to keep it as a straight sofa. A little longer than a regular sofa, but we'll make it work. And then I think I'm going to put a reading nook in there. You know? Oh. Like a nice comfy... Maybe put a Herman Miller...
what's it called? An Eames lounger. An Eames lounger. I would put an Eames lounger. You know, it's actually funny. You bring that up. I've looked up how much those things are. They're like seven, $8,000. It is an egregious amount of money for that. Yes. For that chair. I'm like, for how,
This is like, it's like, like his furniture is already expensive, but then it's like, oh, let's put a designer markup on a piece of furniture. Yep. Herman Miller, baby. You guys want a fun exercise? Well, hold on. Let me tell you the three I was, I was deciding between. Okay. It's actually funny. You bring up the Eames lounger because that was one of the, that was one of the three I was deciding. I was like, do I really want an Eames lounger? By the way, I love Eames. I love Herman Miller.
I will say this. Eames is like, you've definitely seen this chair before. If you've watched any movie of somewhere where there's a lot of rich people or the mafia or something, everyone's got this fucking chair in their head. It was either that. It was that or the womb chair by Knoll.
- The womb. - Womb? - Yes, like a-- - Like our original apartment? - Like the original, yes, yes, like the original dwelling, which is also quite expensive.
About like kind of wet - it is a little wet in there and you have to get like you have to attach some weird To your to your belly button - yeah sit down every time and you have to get like a scissor and then you go Every time you got to stand up and then someone like sucks the pus out. Oh, we know that circumcision. Never mind. Never mind ever The third one was the field lounge chair by blue dot and
And that's the one I wound up going with. It's the cheapest of the three. Can you share your screen so I can see this stuff? Oh, sure. The cheapest of the three loungers, I will say. But I think it fits the best into my space. I got it in the leather, the orange, the orangish leather.
And with the ottoman, it still comes to a good, I think that was, what, $4,000. Oh, my God. So, yes, quite a big purchase. And if you guys want a fun exercise to do, if you're poor and you want to, like, laugh, have a good chuckle on Chuckle Sandwich, go to DWR.com and get really upset that this is where I shop for my furniture.
Join me in the upset. Yeah, Tucker's pissed right now. Yeah, well, he brought this up a couple episodes ago, and I haven't been the same since. Yeah, I've seen... I'm sitting after dinner at the counter going, fuck, he really shops there? That's fucking ridiculous. Yeah. It is ridiculous. Yeah, I spent a little time on this website, too, and I was just like... I was like... I was able to justify it for my couch, but then a lot of this stuff, I'm like...
um maybe maybe i will get in a diy yeah maybe maybe i maybe i don't need 500 bookends from my shelf you know yeah maybe i uh i don't know it's uh it's definitely interesting though it's definitely interesting i mean i'm i'm i'm really hyped about this couch though and i'm gonna be spending a lot of time on it my tv's not up yet
The way I see it is like, okay. Spooky, scary skeletons and shivers down your spine. Sorry guys, now it's officially October. I'm embracing the spooky season. I'm getting a little spooky. I'm feeling a little spooky. I'm looking a little spooky, honestly. Look at me. But do you know what's really spooky? Not having your wardrobe ready for those crisp autumn days.
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every moment with chubbies shop now and fall into comfort one stylish piece at a time all right chucklers this episode of chocolate sandwich is sponsored by acorns let's face it chucklers we've all been guilty of putting off things that don't feel urgent like finally getting rid of that awful uncomfortable couch that i was meaning to replace or fixing that basketball football size hole in your truck huh ted that's not a real thing it is a real thing i've seen it okay well uh
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And if I do, that means I've reached way more money than I even know what to do with. I will never spend money on a first class flight to Japan or anything international like that. The most I'll do is premium economy. Okay.
Because after that 10 hours, after 10 hours. Business. Because I feel like business. So business is like six grand. First class is like 10, 15. It's like, yeah. Okay. After those hours, man, it's like, dude, that money, you just pissed it away. Like take the extra four grand you save by going just premium economy or something and put the rest of the money into a fucking chair or something that you live with every day of your life. It's like, oh, yeah.
I can't justify a first class ticket yet. Yeah. But one day I will. I can justify it currently where I stand on like a domestic flight. Domestic can make sense. Because I would say the equivalent of first class in a domestic flight is like a business flight. And I did one of those. Yeah. I got one of those for a decent price when I went out to Australia. And that was pretty good.
I enjoyed that a lot, but I don't... But then it's over. That money's gone now. I really could never, unless I'm making a YouTube video or something like Ryan Train, I could never justify doing that first-class crazy like Emirates. Like, it's absurd. Like, you know, at that point, you should have a... If you're paying that money, you should have a plane. And talkers should be flying it. Oh, I'd love to. I saw a clip recently that said... That was like Ninja on stream talking about, oh, yeah, me and Jess, we...
We stopped flying private and we saved millions of dollars a year. And I'm like, yeah, dude. Yeah. Fuck. Yeah. That's great.
Yeah, man. Millions of dollars a year? Yeah. He's like, man. He was like, it was a clip of him playing Fortnite. And he was just like playing, building up with the towers. And he was like, yeah, like, dude, private got really expensive over the past year. We saved like hundreds of thousands or like up to a million dollars a year just not flying private anymore. I was like, fuck.
Why did I think of that? We got Tucker out to our last chuckle weekend. I put him on first class for that. Was that your first time in first class? First and only. What was your perception?
It's pretty good. It was pretty good. I think for a domestic flight, you know, why not if you have the money? Because you get to get on first. I agree. And you get the little breakfast or whatever before people are even on. You get the little nips. You ask for as many little Jack Daniels nips as you want. But it was like 9 a.m. It was like 9 a.m. So we didn't. That doesn't matter. That doesn't matter. We didn't partake.
I really wanted you to try that out because it's like I remember my first time when I went on a first class flight and I was like it. Honestly, I whenever I do one, I still feel this. And I don't know if you felt this way, Tucker, but I felt like I was sitting there in the chair and I felt a little embarrassed being there. You're too young.
It's mostly older people. It's more like when people are coming past you. Like, I feel like I needed to make a look at the people going down into the slums. And I had to be like, listen, but I'm...
I'm on your side, though. I don't do this much. How do you think I felt? I didn't even get this ticket. Trust me, I would have been at the way back. You imagine walking back to the favelas back there and you look in first class and there's like a fucking mom and like two kids in the first class seats. You kidding me?
Oh, I see a lot. I do. I see a lot too, dude. And I'm like, wow, that's another level. That's another level. I was flying slums the, the other day when I was coming back from the wedding. We should have like a new term for that. I was flying Camden. I was flying, I was flying Detroit back, back a couple of days ago. And I was sitting there, you know, I'm sure you guys have gotten at least one baby on a flight before and,
But what was interesting about this one was that the baby started crying, started crying behind me. And then a couple rows in front of me to the right in the opposite row, I heard a guy shush the baby. So a baby starts crying and then you hear someone totally else being like, and I don't know if he was talking to the mom or the baby, but like that's gotta be the craziest response that someone could possibly have to a child.
Like, what do you think? You think the baby's going to just like hear that and be like, oh, shit, I got to get myself. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, sir. I'm out of control right now. I got to keep it together right now.
Or like the mom doesn't know that the baby is bothering people. That was like the craziest thing I'd seen in terms of reaction to a child. That's a first class, that's a winner's mentality is what it is really. I mean, if you're paying for a seat, it had better be a great experience. I mean, because that money is being pissed away. Oh, no, but I was like in the middle of it. Like I was in the back.
this is the back oh right you were flying slums yeah it's fine yeah yeah dude yeah this is good this is going to be a strange podcast
- For anyone who isn't grinding. - It's just flexing your wealth. - Yeah, anyone who's not a founder. - The Little History Podcast for anyone that doesn't fly that much. - Anyone who's not building in public is gonna be real uncomfortable. - I remember when I first started doing the YouTube stuff and I was going out to the cons and stuff, that was like twice a year or once a year. That was the most I was ever flying. Most of my travel was just by car.
Now I fly way too much, I feel like now, than I used to. - Yeah, I see you like once a month now. - Yeah, I mean you're either out here or--
Yeah. Honestly, you know, in hindsight, Tucker, I kind of wish you came out for TwitchCon. I'm sorry. You told me not to. I said, Ted, should I come out for TwitchCon? I didn't tell you not to. I told you. Honestly, dude, I probably wouldn't be able to go everywhere with you, so you probably shouldn't. Well, no, it was one of those things where I didn't. Well, here's the thing. I wasn't sure. Not like you've only streamed three times this year. Are you listening to me? Are you listening to me?
I didn't want you to come out and then turn into a thing where it was like, because the type of pass that I had would allow me to get into certain places. And I wanted to make sure if you were to come, I'd be able to get you an equivalent pass so you could go everywhere with me. And you weren't just going to be sitting around being like,
okay well i have nothing to do but then it ended up being a thing where i wasn't even really i wasn't at the con that much and i was going around doing stuff and i there was a lot of things i could have i probably would have in hindsight gotten you into which is why i was bummed out about twitch the live streaming site got you a vip pass streamer ted nivison yes and they didn't get they didn't get tucker keen like career streamer
A VIP pass? Yeah. They didn't get that for him? I've streamed hundreds of hours this year. I would say next year, Tucker definitely is getting in. But the reason why I got it was because I was in a show.
Oh, you did the live name your price thing, didn't you? No, I did. I did Point Crow's yes or no. Yes. Show, which was like some sort of version of deal or no deal. OK. OK. Yeah. Funny. Yeah. And then I also did Hassan's debate lords thing, which I wish I was had to was one of the debaters in. But he was like, oh, but you could come on as a cameo. I'm like, OK.
Show up and this isn't anything that like Hassan did like he wasn't playing the show This is like a lot of like it was twitch stuff. They were like I show up there They say oh you gotta show up at to casting calls three right talent calls three. I show up there They're like all right. They bring me back to the fucking Wardrobe area they show me this blue windbreaker and the smallest little space helmet you've ever seen and they're like we're gonna do an Among Us bit Oh, and I'm like
And this year, and then they were like, okay, you're going to put this on and then you're going to go up and you're going to just say, it's like, it was like a town hall question thing. And I'm like, okay, that's easy enough. So I put that on and then they like shuttle us out into the audience. Um, and then it's like me, peace jars. And, uh,
We're sitting there for like three. The whole thing was like three hours long. So I'm sitting there in the fucking among us stupid fucking hat thing for like two hours and 50 minutes before I go up there. Let you take it off. Well, they were like, you got to come out here and be ready to go do it. I'm sitting there. I'm like,
I'm like slowly seeping into this chair. I'm like, they really are having me sit here for that long. Like I was like, give me an itinerary or something so I can go and like have a burger or something. My stomach's growling. Yeah, burger.
- Burger, could go for a burger right now. - It was funny too, 'cause they wanted us to go into like a random, they wanted it to be like, oh, these people are coming out of the audience for town hall questions. They wanted to put me in a random spot in the crowd. And I was like, I'm glad I said no, 'cause I would've just been sitting there for two hours and 15 minutes just in this fucking stupid, obnoxious costume. - In between a bunch of fucking losers who went to TwitchCon.
With the regular pass. TwitchCon was good this year, dude. I'm glad that they're not doing it in San Diego anymore. Or not San Diego. In Vegas. Because I liked Vegas. I enjoyed it. But it felt like a special episode of TwitchCon. San Diego's nice. It was one of those things where I was there and I was like, maybe when I'm done with LA, maybe I'll go to San Diego.
likely place for you to go. Yeah. It seems like a place. It seems like a place to settle for, for a, you know, and I took the, I took the train down that weekend. Yeah. I took the Amtrak down. It was awesome. Sounds fun. Sounds fun. And you don't care.
No, I don't care. I was actually so happy I didn't go. Seeing all those tweets of people just like hanging out with my buddies at TwitchCon. Come to my panel. Come to my fucking talk. Oh, I'm doing this live show on the stage at TwitchCon. I was like, thank God I don't have to be here.
It was crazy. At one point, we were going to try to check out the... Because one of the cool things about TwitchCon is the artist alley where they have a bunch of artists that make stuff that you can buy. And I was with... It was like me, BB No Money, Caroline Kwan, and Pokimane. And we were like, oh, let's... They had some time before the thing. We were like, oh, let's go check out the artist alley, right? We go out there into the artist alley thing.
And I have never seen someone get stun locked like Pokemon got stun locked. It was like a crowd formed. Yeah. Where it's like, oh, nice merch. Well, yeah.
- Getting stun locked is like, oh you're at a convention, you walk somewhere, somebody recognizes you, you stop for the photo, but then everyone who happens to be passing by in the traffic, some of them will also recognize you and then you get stun locked there if you're trying to move somewhere for however long. She got so stun locked, she had to like,
Leave to the OTV booth and just do like an impromptu meet-and-greet because it was just like so much I was like, holy crap. I've Experienced it by like I've never seen anything like that. That sounds like nothing I'd ever want she was swallowed by It was by the Horde. I mean she is like the queen of twitch So it's like it makes sense It makes sense because she she very much so is like she is twitch, but I was like wow and you know, I
It was crazy. Crazy. Crazy. Crazy world. And the rich just get richer. And people ask me, they were like, we're slat. And at this point, I'll be honest with you, I would say he's not here and he'll never come to a convention. Should have just said, not streaming. I say, he's not here, he's never coming to a convention. You just missed him. Yeah.
He actually was just here. He's down the hall. He's right over there. I think he's actually somewhere around me. If you go far, I use you as a diver. Guys, that'd be so mean. My God, that'd be so mean. Yeah. When I was in L.A. a couple of weeks ago, I went to dinner with Connor. And the amount of photos I took just on the way to dinner.
Was like, man, really good. Yeah. I feel like when we've been out in L.A., you haven't really gotten recognized that much. We got lucky. We've we've gotten lucky. But I'm telling you, Connor. Yeah. Maybe they see me and they're like, went to some mall in Burbank. It was hip. There was a there was a lot of young folk around. Even during dinner, I had like two people come up and ask for photos. I'm just sitting down. What was the restaurant? What was this place? I don't know. It was some some brew house we walked into. They had a great coffee flavored beer. Oh, wow.
During Chuckle Week, Schlatt looks so miserable that even diehard fans are like, ooh, maybe not this time. Maybe I stay away from him. You can see those anime words hovering above his head. He's like...
Yeah, if I'm in Los Angeles, just assume I'm miserable and don't want to be there. And maybe use that as like the precursor to whether or not you decide to come up to me. Should we let them know it's happening? Yeah, okay, okay, yeah. We're doing Chuckle Week. We're doing another Chuckle Week. It's coming up. It's coming up soon. Yay.
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Visit BetterHelp.com to learn more. That's BetterHelp.com. Trust me when I say that as that whole week's going by, Tucker and I are going to be doing, we're going to be so locked in.
It is going to be like we're going to be like, how do we keep Schlatt at tip top happiness? It is going to be like we're going to be like we're going to be what are we going to do? We're going to be like pumping my Bach air into my apartment. We're going to be like we're going to be like figuring out what his favorite smells are. So whenever he walks in the room, we're going to like.
Start I'm gonna start playing like like little hints of white noise But it's just like little notions of things that death star and get me Death Star ambience in the podcast room playing as I walk in have the fucking oatmeal cookie Boulangerie Anthropology candle burning at least 30 minutes before I walk in. Are you writing this down? I
Bro, you're setting up the set. You're the producer. Write this down. Yeah. And I want a little cat. He wants a little cat. I want a little cat. I guess I could probably grab Zelda and bring Zelda to the set. Zelda! Yes, yes. Get Zelda, please. Please.
I'll have to bring Zelda then. That'd be so cute. Imagine me just holding a cat the whole time on the podcast. That'd be great. That'd be interesting. I hope that... Do you think a cat would be safe to have on set, though? They're just going to start eating wires. Yeah, of course. Well, Zelda's a psycho. Someone's just got to look after him for a second. Her, him. You never know what cats are these days. You're allergic to cats. Slightly, but like the... Oh, I don't think he's ever admitted that.
We've gone over this like four times in the last quarter. Look, it's like the same thing with lactose. The upset that it will make my stomach is not comparable to the happiness of having a Dairy Queen blizzard. This was connecting to us wondering why you're always sick. Okay, well, I can tell you why I'm always sick. I'm always sick because I worked in a freezer.
That was covered wall to wall. You think you have like chronic, a chronic illness from work? Chronic mold exposure. Yes. Whoa. I think that's where my, yeah, I think that's where my, I think that's where that comes from. Oh damn. We're still holding on to that.
That's I mean, he's got to otherwise he loses his blue collar stats, dude. And he lost those a long time ago. He needs it for his build. His build, his build calls for it, dude. His build? My build requires at least like 20 percent. About 2019, he respect. No, I didn't. I was still working. No, I wasn't.
I was flying. I actually fly. My first, my first first class flight was in 2019. Did you buy it yourself? Yeah.
I did. 2019 was the respect. Was that when you came to TwitchCon? Yeah, TwitchCon. That was the first TwitchCon I ever went to. The first TwitchCon ever, I think. We landed, Schlatt and I landed around the same time and I met him as he walked off the plane. Yeah, and on the way home from TwitchCon, I was in the JetBlue Mint section.
I boarded the plane first and then two people I knew from baseball, from travel baseball, boarded the plane and they came in and they were like, Schlatt? And I'm like, oh, hey guys. Whoa, that's funny. You know what's weird? I actually had a similar thing before.
happened to me literally last weekend i was leaving the hotel and the elevator opens and then i i see a person there they go ted did you did you recognize her yeah i did i did i was like whoa this is weird you know because i'm in san diego and we're miles and miles and miles away from that's not them um we're miles and miles away from
from Massachusetts. That's a while away. It's like the opposite side of the country almost. It is, just about. You're never going to find them, Tucker. Never? Just based on the way it's going. I'm looking for me. You don't have to watch this. Well, because it's distracting because then I'm like, he's not paying attention. Sometimes when I really want to make sure I don't distract you, I pull it over here and I do it. Well, yeah, because this is for us.
This is for us. And you're like, this is like you. I'm just researching. If it truly is for us, Tucker. Yeah. Look up Kimmy Granger. No, don't look at Kimmy Granger likes it. Please just start playing it just so I can see it in my periphery. Kimmy Granger. New sensations. Oh, yeah. It's that first one. I'm not even watching this stream anymore. Let me tell you. He's got a huge cock. My wife edits this.
No, no, no. Charlie, you're welcome. You're welcome. And you know what? Since we posted that last episode where I gave it a shout out, that comment section is full of people thanking me. Really? I did see some people saying, like, good taste, dude. And I've never seen that before. Wait, wait. Yeah. Wait, what? What?
Wait, what happened? I just found the relevant r slash chuckle post. Oh. Jimmy Granger likes it. She does. She does like it rough. Let me tell you, the energy in that porno is on another level, especially at the beginning. You know, they say, you know, no one watches it for the plot. That first, like, that first 30 seconds optimized for YouTube retention. Let me tell you. They should make some YouTube videos. So...
We were going to do something today, weren't we? Well, I'll say, you know, Ted, it's funny you brought up TwitchCon because I was kind of bitching about that today around the apartment. I was like, you've been shadowboxing me all day. I have. I have for various reasons. But the TwitchCon one, I was like, fuck's Ted at TwitchCon? He doesn't even fucking stream. Fucking guy.
I was like, I stream fucking three, four nights a week for all year. And I was like, what's Ted streamed? Three, four times this year? Ever. Yeah. Yeah. I was like, what gives, man? And when Ted was streaming regularly, he was just playing music and gaffing off. And hitting that pipe.
Was he really? Yeah. And he wouldn't even talk. He'd just play Minecraft and vibe. Oh, yeah. He did his shit back in 2019. Oh, you're talking about my silent streams because my roommate was sleeping? Oh, yeah. I would do these silent streams in 2019 on SMP Live because my roommate...
uh would get back and he'd go to sleep but i didn't want the i didn't want the views to stop i was addicted because it was a it was a money printer i mean yeah but a money printer when you'd never made money before larger than like 200 a month so like i was like a couple hundred dollars yeah you know so
Yeah, I would. I would like I was like doing that was back when I was doing like the fucking gardening stuff in the the original like ruins build that I did. Tucker, I would watch that. I would watch that in the back. Yeah, I was silent.
I was silent. You had a good build, man. Oh, yeah. You would just have music on. I actually like those ones. I would be like, man, this is really good background. Yeah, it's good vibes. Maybe I should do some more in the future. People would be like, wait, why isn't he saying anything? Because if that face came on, I'd be like,
I'm honestly, honestly, it was kind of like. I tuned in for the first time. I was like, is he just not talking? You're just there? Yeah, no, I was hard at work. Did you get good views doing that? I think I, I think I got, I was getting 70 to 120 viewers. That's just him.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, man. Anything back then was like, seemed crazy. Oh yeah. As long as it's, as long as it was on SMP live, anything like that would, you know, it would have worked. And you know what? All those streams are lost to time. I bet there's not a single copy of any of those streams.
No, no, because I didn't know. Yeah, someone posted on my subreddit that was like, he had a whole Excel spreadsheet of like every stream I'd done for SMP Live. And it was marked green or red based on whether he could find an actual. Exactly. And he's like, dude, 75% of these streams are like gone. And I looked back and I was like, oh, fuck, yeah. Were you not running a VODs channel or something?
No, no. No, I mean, we just did... We were figuring it out as we went on what the stuff was. And I still haven't even figured it out. I don't have a VOD channel. Honestly, I didn't... Yeah, yeah. No, it was definitely...
That's crazy. That's crazy to think about. There is certain saved clips, though. Clips kind of save some moments, some peak moments, I think. But the full VODs definitely lost a time for sure. But the moment I hit 10,000 subscribers is one of the clips on my channel. That's saved. Saved the time.
That's cool. Save the time. But sometimes, you know, the nostalgia of those streams is the downtime. It's like, oh, you were watching them on like a second monitor and the memories you have of them are like just the whole vibe, you know? Yeah. Nothing necessarily entertaining was going on. It was just with you in that moment. I think about that a lot when Trainwreck was watching Gordon Ramsay play.
Like food, whatever the fuck. What was the show called that Gordon Ramsay did? What the fuck? When he yelled at everybody? The Kitchen? No, no, it was the competition. Chopped? Hell's Kitchen? Chopped. That's a good show. I don't remember. Hell's Kitchen? MasterChef. MasterChef. Damn it. MasterChef. I was watching MasterChef. That's one that I'm not a MasterChef. They had that fucking Christmas tree in the back. Remember when that was controversial? Controversial? What?
watching like a like a reality TV show I know on Twitch like that was like that was that was really pushing the envelope back in the day I actually have a question for for my own toolbox here can you just watch a movie on Twitch like could I throw my camera up and just be like yeah we're gonna watch Spirited Away tonight
You could in the moment. You could in the moment, but it's going to get DMCA'd. Yeah, and you're going to get in trouble, probably. You'll probably get banned for it. You're going to get your ass spanked. It was way more Wild West back in the day. Yeah. I mean, like, I don't think anyone can get away with watching MasterChef now either. You don't think so? No, I don't think so. I guess that's why a lot of streamers just take, rip YouTubers' videos and then post it on their highlights channel and it's inherited. Yeah, because the YouTubers aren't going to strike you. You can just steal all the money you want from them. Yeah. You know?
That's what I love about YouTubers. They're just so like, they don't know what they're worth. You know, I just love exploiting them. What are we talking about? The Grog party was pretty fun. Grog's coming to the U.S. What is Grog? Grog. It's, um, what is Grog? It's, um,
It's like a Japanese type of... Sochu. Sochu. It's like S-O-C-H-J-U. But I was out in San Diego and I met up with Chad Max. We're all drinking. We're having a good time. We're at this bar called the Coin-Op. And basically, Chad and I, there's this... There's a group of like...
girls who are there we don't really know them but one of one of their friends like she is like a hundred percent like got roofied you know she's like falling over because like what's weird about getting roofed is it's like it's not like normal level of like wasted drunk it's like you just can't stand up and use your body but you're not like throwing up so it was like she was like way way too drunk um so chad and i are like helping this girl to the point where it was just like
We ended up going with them to the hospital to make sure that they were okay. And they ended up being okay. It ended up being totally fine. And so Chad and I were like, okay, cool. They're all set. And I was like, I'm probably just going to take, because it was the end of the night anyway, so I was like, I'm probably just going to take an Uber back. Do you want to come with me? He's like, sure. We get in the Uber. I get dropped off. Chad's going back to his Airbnb. I wake up the next morning, and I text Chad, and I'm like, you know, if you think about it, we're kind of like heroes. And he responds, yeah, dude.
Also, I got arrested. I'm in Mexico right now. And I say, what? Send photos or fake. And he sends me a photo from Google Maps of him below the border of the United States in Tijuana. He got somehow he got arrested and was in Mexico.
And he's telling me, he's like, he's, he's texting me and he's like, Oh dude, don't worry about it. I'll be back in like 20 minutes, dude. I'm going to swing on my way out of this. They're only checking phones like every 18 minutes. They don't even have any idea. I have my phone. I'm like, Chad, what are you talking about? How did you get arrested? It's been six hours since I last saw you. How'd you get to Mexico? And he's,
That and then and he goes dark and I don't hear from him from like they check this phone. Yeah something like that I don't hear from for four hours and then the next I'd follow up with I'm like, where are you next? Next thing I get is a video of Chad walking in his Airbnb with like a whole bunch of papers waving him He somehow get he's a strong Australia. I do not know how this man got into Mexico or out of Mexico, but he did
In the course of 24 hours. I think both of the Cold One's crew's lives are just kind of fever dreams. Yeah. Maybe they're like perpetually in a state of disorientation where their lives don't even seem to make too much sense anymore. Yeah. He called it a...
He called our journey to like help the, the roofie woman, a side quest. But he also referred to the rest of that experience of him being stuck in Mexico, arrested as part of the side quest. So when I saw him next, he said no more, he was like no more side quests.
That's pretty good. Dude, I wish I could make my whole internet persona off of drinking, dude. Oh, yeah. That'd be crazy if you did that. It doesn't seem like it. I'm just so jealous of the Cold Ones guys because they get to just drink on camera, you know? And that's like their whole shtick. Dude, you know what you should do? If you want, you should make some sort of... Drunk talk a week. Oh. What you should do...
is whenever we plan our our experience in japan the good one you know so you're going to be going out there but the good ones when i'm out there respectfully right um you should fit in an australia stop in there and go on the cold ones i feel like that would that would be a fun time for you go on the cold ones go on the cold ones yeah
I could get drunk from it. I'm drunk now. No, but go on the Cold One show. But why? Are they going to pay me? Did they pay you to go on it? Oh, no, no. And they leave Ludwig's balls. And what else did they do?
They swore. Honestly, they swore. And they swore a lot. And I hate swearing. I don't do that. And I don't know. I'd rather just get drunk in an izakaya in Japan. Okay, fair enough. Fine. Sea Dog VA took me to a real izakaya where there's not a single white person in the entire place. And we walked in and we got eyeballs full.
yeah and uh i heard that you were saying that this is a thing in japan where there's no uh there's like places where it's like no foreigners allowed yeah sometimes i mean they most of the time they're not brave enough to actually say no foreigners on a sign or anything but like you know there were plenty of times especially if you go out with a big group because i mean there's there's also just not a lot of room in a lot of these restaurants but like you'll get the
don't go no that's like the international sign for no fuck off we will not take you i was i did get that quite a bit i was getting told by um by some folks that korea is like the same way like south korea not north korea i mean north korea would probably be similar but but like in south korea like for those like the some of the like otb people when they're trying to get like an uber or something if
It was like for those of them that had like a Korean last name, they could get an Uber really easily. But if they had like a foreigner last name, they were always getting canceled on. It doesn't fucking it doesn't surprise me. Honestly, when you get people like, you know, a kick streamer going into a construction site and screaming Nagasaki, Nagasaki, like it just that happened. Yes, they get a bad foreigners have gotten a pretty bad rap.
I think because they kind of, you know, the worst of them use these places like a playground. And I've been very, very mindful every time I go to like tone down the persona and shit. So most of the content I make in Japan is like,
Totally different than anything I upload. It's your calm content. Most of the time. I've posted a couple walking tours. I like those walking tours. I've watched all of those. You know what? That would be good, and I bet Tucker's using it this way. That'd be a good high video.
Yeah, that would be. That'd be like those McDonald's, like, GoPros. Honestly, I feel like the McDonald's thing is a little bit different. A little what? I feel like the McDonald's thing is a little bit different. And honestly, it's got a... That was because I hold that close to my heart because that was like Tucker and I's, I think, probably our first real good high hangout. I'll tell you, man. The best high content is watching sumo food on YouTube. These big... Oh, yeah. I mean...
Yeah. We watched this. We watched. We not watch this. No, this was phenomenal. What a phenomenal night we had. Yeah. It's just a bunch of it's just a bunch of huge sumo wrestlers. Oh, throwing me to go to bed into a I was like disappointed. I was like disappointed that we had to go to Vegas. I was like, this is like the
best thing that I've ever watched when I'm high. It's some of the best long-form content you guys will ever watch. Anyone listening to this, just look up Sumo Food. It's an entirely Japanese channel. All the comments are Japanese. I think I might be the only English viewer, but luckily they have English subtitles like
actually well translated english subtitles you could get to know all these sumo wrestlers that are all living in a house it's like a frat house yeah all they do is eat and practice and it's just this channel where these guys just just like throw shit into a pot they're like what are we what are we having today and they're like yeah we're doing pork today and they dump a fucking 50 pound piece of pork into a pot and start boiling it
Yeah. And it's like, yeah, that's what they're doing, I guess. And we also just watch sumo matches for about like an hour and a half. We did. We did. Oh, God, I love sumo so much. It's such a cool. It's such a cool thing. It's my favorite sport. It's probably my favorite sport at this. You should do. There's the video idea right there. Training become a sumo wrestler. I don't think you need to do it. You don't think I would hang out with them 100 percent, but I'm not going to like do practice.
I've done it. I know. If I could do it, you could do it. I'm not saying I couldn't do it. I'm saying I don't want to. It kind of feels like you're saying that you can't do it. No, I definitely can do it. Oh, well, then do it, pussy. No, I'd rather sit there and be in a sumo food video where they just sit. Okay, they all sit.
And the higher ranks get to eat first. So you'll see Rouga and Nabatame. They'll sit down first next to Master. I know that that's their real names too with how much you've watched this. Always. Oyakata Master is always in a blue puma shirt and dark blue shorts. And he sits down on this milk crate. And like the higher ranked guys eat with him first. And then they all go down the line and they slowly start eating. And then they all put their hands together and go, gochandesu.
And they start eating. And then the second half of these sumo food videos are just the biggest fucking guys you ever see jacked out of their minds. They're traps. They're traps leaking out of their skin. And they're just. Oh, man. But, you know, they've been working hard for that because it's like. Oh, yeah. When I did the sumo wrestling training with with off carry, it was like.
That was exhausting. Like I was so tired. I was pretty out of shape at that point after, you know, because I play so much basketball with my, with my friend of mine, Hassan, I probably wouldn't have too much of a problem with it now. Cause like when I did my first game that I played a basketball with my friend Hassan, I, um, shut up. I was like, I was like, Tucker,
I will say it is kind of funny how much you mentioned this. Yeah, like that last one was probably a joke, but the 10 that have come before that in the last three weeks, those came authentically out of you. Guys, I have no idea what you're talking about. I'm just talking about my friend Hasan who I play basketball with. Continue. So like, are you just going to interrupt me? No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm having a good time with my good friend Hasan who I play basketball with.
I just know it's fine. You just do. Okay. Okay. So the first time I played basketball with my friends on, I, I was like feeling like I was going to throw up after, you know, you know, that level of like the cardio work where you're like, and, and, and, and, you know, my friend Hassan was such a good motivator. My friend Hassan, he was such a good motivator that he was like, I'll keep going. And I was like, God, this is why we're friends. Uh, so, uh,
You know, if I did sumo wrestling again, I'd probably be a little bit more prepared for it. But they have to do a whole thing where they're going like this. And it's all about... Oh, yeah. The Shiko. The Shiko. And that's tiring after about 30 seconds of doing that. Oh, here he goes. Nice. That's what they do. I need a little bit of a wider stance on that. But I got where you were going. Okay.
all your listeners love you death he's doing it oh he's wide now oh yeah there he goes okay holy crap that's the most eccentric thing schlatt's done in a long time that's why i wouldn't do it that's why i just want to eat with them uh also i just want to put this out there if you are the stable master of the futa goyama beya
Please follow me back on Twitter. I would love to visit and have a great time with Naba Tommy and Kega and Kuai and Roga and Kotaki Yama and Kikuchi and Nobe Hara and Soga and Denuma. All these guys. I love them. Please invite me. Arigato gozaimasu.
I was pretty good. Honestly, if I was the guy who was running that show there, I mean, I'd be I'd be I'd be down to have you. But, you know, they're going to make you try. I would need a translator, but we figure it out. I think they should make you try, though. I feel like that'd be good if you're going to eat. If you're going to if you're going to chow down with those boys, you're going to have to fight with those boys. That seems like like you're going to eat with his brother. You're going to have to.
get dirty with hell no i'm not getting dirty with them they you saw them in there it's like they don't even have like a mat scenario it's like just dirt it's clay yeah clay they don't fuck around and it's awesome
Oh, it is awesome sumo is is my genuinely my favorite sport I was lost because of the times it those diaper things are there or what are they called the mo washi the mo washi? Incredibly uncomfortable very very rigid rigid. I mainly don't yeah I mean Ted if I'm being honest, that's the main reason I don't want to do it I don't want to have to wear that thing wedged in between my balls and my gooch. Oh, yeah, yes, they tie that thing tight. Mm-hmm
Let me tell you that thing. That thing's right up in your crack. Yeah. You're going to need some wet wipes. Oh, yeah. Better bring a gallon of baby powder with you. That's why bidets are popular in Japan. Yeah, because they're so chafed. It's like you put a piece of toilet paper in. I get raw after like two or three shits in one day. Moving into this new place, they got these Kohler. Why are you laughing? Because I'm just like,
There's a passion. It's just like the passion. I get raw. I'm just saying, I moved into a new place. The bidet toilet seats don't fit on the toilets because there's some proprietary Kohler bullshit.
and I'm running I gotta wipe I gotta wipe like a fucking poor person like a common man wait so you've been the whole time you're in your new place yeah I've been lying about using it yeah I've been lying about using it uh
I haven't used one since. I haven't used a bidet. I haven't felt the warmth of a bidet in like half a year, bro. Whoa, that's wild. I'm trying to figure out how to get mine installed on my current toilet. I did notice that in your house. You need a new toilet. You need a new toilet. Yeah, I mean, like I get raw after like two, three shits in one day. By that fourth shit, like if I had like some good food or something or some bad food, then I'd really like it's a real tough time in there.
I don't want to touch it anymore. You know what we should do for an episode? We should bring in someone to do a tarot reading for us. Yeah, I just had one done. Like a tarot cards. You just had a reading done? You said that in full serious? Yeah, you don't follow my Instagram? I don't use Instagram. Anyway, yeah, I got the card reading done. It's going to be a good year. Come next June, people are going to be talking about me. That's with anything else?
I can't. I don't want to give you guys too much. I don't think that's really allowed. It's like a wish. If you tell people your wish, it's not going to come true. You want to get a tarot card reading, you don't know the fucking basics of this shit, dude. You're going to throw it down the drain like that. Your reading will be completely inept by lunch. It'll be gone. We'll take a lunch and it's gone. Pointless. Bye.
You take that shit and you keep it close. Keep it close to your chest. So are you telling me now, Tucker, that nobody's talking about you in June then? That's just a snippet. Maybe now it'll be July. You can't change the rule. I'm just giving you a snippet. It was probably 25 minutes. It was probably 25 minutes of...
We were closer than this. You might need to go back to her and be like, hey, I let some info slip. What's the time? How far back is my timeline? Is there an insurance on this? Yeah. What's the estimated time of arrival now on these wishes? You know, I'd say based off her vibe, it's two weeks to a month that I just push the timeline back. But I didn't give a lot away. You know, it's like 20, 25 minutes of us, you know, of reading. So I only gave you one sentence there.
That was a lot to unpack that night. I couldn't sleep. Shly, what do you think that you would be told if you got a tarot reading? Do you think it would be mysterious? Do you think it would unpack something within you? Ted, let me be completely honest with you. I've tuned out for the past five minutes. I've been looking at real estate on Fire Island. Thanks for watching, guys.
