Bonus #95 - Justin Schlegel and Tommy Sinbazo [PATREON PREVIEW]
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And when you're more, that means you get more and more. Ooh, but not so much of that. Sign up at work money, get money saving tips, skip the rent, get more rich, sign up at work money.org slash more rich contest for your chance to win $50,000. I'm calling in about an issue that I have with a friend who just kind of doesn't get the boundary. I'm trying to set with our friendship here. Basically, uh,

I worked with this guy for probably six months or so, and we were work friends, you know, got happy hour every now and then and eventually became golfing buddies. Like we would go and golf probably once a week or once every other week.

And recently, after knowing him for about a year, he asked me if I would be in his wedding as a groomsman. And to be honest, I was pretty caught off guard and...

I said yes because you can't really deny someone that I feel like and I don't hate the guy, you know, I don't see him as that level of friend. I can't deny that. I'm happy to be there for him. And ever since then, he has kind of tried to step up our friendship. Like he'll ask me for prime times, like to hang out on like Saturday nights or plan long weekends well in advance and ask me to like...

go to a cabin with him and his girlfriend and his girlfriend's friends, none of which are very hot. Respect. You would have never got this call. Ever. The cabin with him and his girlfriend and his girlfriend's friends, none of which are very hot. And so I was very content with the relationship being just golf-like.

and someone that I hang out with every now and then, and he's clearly trying to escalate it to a best friend level. So how do I preserve the golf friendship without taking it up the chain like what he's trying to do? If you have any advice on that, that would be great. Thank you. Interesting. If I could. Yes, please. Thomas, thank you. You're welcome.

I had this exact situation fall in my lap. Years ago, I had someone in my life, like Tommy is a dear friend. If he finally gets married around the year 2035, I expect to be in the wedding party. Once I've moved Lou's brain into a robot, I feel. Yeah, yeah, yes. Once he's...

Once you've printed her new body. Yes, the 6'8", 350-pound women's kickboxer. Yes, don't mind the green skin. Yes, don't mind her tent tread feet. But years ago, I had a dude that I was, I would like to say, a fucking acquaintance at best. He asked if we can get lunch together. I'm like, yeah, that's fine, cool. We sit down, we get lunch. He goes, hey, man.

I think it's pretty clear what you mean to me. Like, what the fuck are you talking about? I see you twice a week if I need to go and remit a form at work. And he goes...

I'd like you to be the best man at my wedding. Best man? Best man at his wedding. This dude and I were work acquaintances. We never hung out outside of work. We never did shit. If I didn't see him at work, I didn't see him. We didn't fucking text. We didn't do anything. And I found out that in his world, I was his best friend. Yeah. On a list of 100 people, I would call a friend.

He wasn't on that list. He was an acquaintance. He was underneath of that shit. Tough, dude. So here's what I did. And this is per the advice of our friend, trans comedian Joe Robinson. He said, get his name wrong. Fuck his name up. In casual conversation. I'm going to make up a name to save the identity of the innocent. But let's just say his name was Rick.

Just saying, being like, hey, you know, Rick wants you to be the best man. I'm like, dude, I appreciate that, Rich. That's cool. You know, I've always wanted you to find happiness, Rich. And I think, you know, it's finally time for you to find your forever, Rich. It's, it's Rick. Oh my God, I'm so embarrassed. And I,

And I accidentally, purposefully let him know, you don't mean shit from shit to me. So over the course of a conversation or two, I fucked my way out of having to be. Did he ask you not to do it after that? What was the conversation? No, he moved on. He had his brother do it.

No, he... After two conversations at work where I called him Rich instead of Rick, not what I actually said, but I fucked up small, immediately known details. Like, if I called him Tim instead of Tommy, he'd be like, what the fuck? I thought we were boys. So what about that initial conversation? What did you say? I was like, man, that is... Wow. Yeah. Yeah.

That's heavy, dude. So you two are ready? You've been together for a while now? Okay, cool. I immediately go home and tell my girlfriend, like, what the fuck do I do? The guy I see twice a week to submit some form so I can be reimbursed for gas money two levels before underneath of where I work. I don't know shit about him. I don't know his last name. That's crazy.

But you're like, okay, that's crazy. We're dealing with an insanely lonely individual, it sounds like, over there. This is a weird thing because this guy has somewhat of a relationship. They're sort of friends. Yeah. And it's even like, listen, if he just asks him to be in his wedding party...

Like, some guys marry women with 100 friends. Exactly. And when you get to, like, grooms, they have to stretch to 10 groomsmen. They have six. And spots eight, nine, and ten are, like, golf buddies. They're the practice squad. And, okay, if that was the case, and he didn't try and up him to this other level of, like, that's fine. But, like, there is... This is kind of the equivalent of friendship. Like...

He's trying to take this friendship to the next level. This is like the straight dude equivalent to a guy who's friends with a woman trying to fuck that woman. He's trying to friendship fuck this guy, and he's got to keep him in the friend zone. The golf friend zone. In terms of how you accomplish that,

Can I suggest something that you do very well? Sure. You and I have a great relationship. I text you, you text me back. I'm like, Stav, awesome. Heard about the new movie. That's great. Justin, heard you got to be at the grand opening of a Roy Rogers. Thank you, Stav. I appreciate that. Hey, Stav, is there any way you can get me into the mothership? And then you just won't text back. You never asked to get into the mothership. That's brilliant. You never asked me that. You never asked me that, you motherfucker.

I would fucking send a text. Will I? Am I an infrequent texter? Yes. But I don't ever deny requests. If you ask me something, I do. No, dude, he texts back every single time. You just need to ice this fucking guy out. You just got to ice him out. You need to treat this guy like when I texted Stav that we were seeing Wolverine Deadpool on Muscles.

I was in England. I'm sorry. I saw the text like nine hours later. I should have texted you back. Did I not respond to that text? No one talks to me. You didn't fucking send it. You're asking a dude that's in London. I'm 20 minutes from you. You have a fucking Android. I'm in London. I would have seen it. What do you want from me, man? You don't respond to green text. What the fuck?

The company pays for my phone. You went so alien with Eric, he didn't even ask me. No, you didn't think you liked aliens. I said I'm a real alien. What? These guys' twisted tees was a mistake. God damn it. This is like fucking gremlins. Don't feed your white trash friends twisted tees after 7 p.m. Dude, you got a whole new spin off. They'll start airing all their grievances. It's Mike's

It definitely sounds like this guy doesn't have any male friends. Yeah. He, if I, it's, it's a hard situation. I had, we do these murder mysteries. Yeah. Uh, we didn't have five countries. We do it with trans comedian, Joe Robinson. But we had in our early days of doing it, we had a sound guy that was the sound guy at the Baltimore comedy, uh,

what was it? The comedy factory. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And from just doing one or two of these murder mysteries with him, he asked me, hey man, would you be in my bridal, would you be one of my groups? I fucking remember that. And I was like, oh.

I don't know your last name. I wasn't making a lot of money then, and it would have been $500 to buy my own outfit for this thing. And I had to tell him, like, dude, I'm... You're like, I got to spend that on a Dr. Doom costume. Yeah. Okay. You know... Sorry, all my fucking... I'm going to add on this 3D printer. All my fabric money is tied up on Dr. Doom. I'd love to, but it's cloak season. It's about to get cold.

But I had to tell him. I was like, look, I can't afford... Thank you for thinking of me, but I can't do that. I can't be a part of that. Yes, yes. And so the problem is, the quickest way is you gotta nip that shit in the bud. And so you haven't done that, and now he's in a tough position where...

If he does want to preserve the golf shit, which it sounds like you got a good thing going. It sounds like you dig that. You hang out, you play golf, but leave it at that. And so if you want to preserve that, you just... I mean, how long is this wedding? Like, when is this wedding coming up? You just kind of have to...

You just gotta have to be elusive until this wedding. Yeah. You agreed to be in the wedding party. You're not the best man. Just fucking suck it up. Yeah. And just get through it. The fact that you're just a part of the party but not the best man, dude, just go through it. Don't fucking upgrade the... Like, for example, trans comedian Joe Robinson asked me to come to his wedding in Mexico.

Yeah. One of my best friends. I'm like, I would not miss my trans friend Joe's wedding, but I couldn't afford to go to Mexico. And he understood. Yeah. And you just tell him. Yeah. I didn't go either. None of us went. I'm not going to do a goddamn date. I was like, what? You're marrying a woman. Get married in Glen Burnie and I'll be there. Yes.

But yeah, something like this, the fact that you're part of a wedding party, suck it up, just do that. Don't step it up. Don't do one-on-ones. And if anything, you're going to have to like, again, treat it like you're a woman trying to keep someone in the friend zone. He should just Saturday 10 o'clock hang out and say, hey man, I actually have something to do. Why don't we get lunch? You know what I mean?

Push him back. Push him back to where he belongs. Bump him up just a little bit. Just a hair. Just a little bit for smooth sailing in your golf. Yeah, don't lose the golf thing, which sounds like you enjoy doing. I just had a brilliant idea. See?

smash one of the wives' not good-looking friends. Oh, make it an issue. And fuck up. Treat her poorly. Yeah, fuck up that relationship. You get a little bit of pussy out of it. Fuck up the relationship. And then the wife tells him, I don't like that guy. And you're not allowed back around. And then he's like, don't worry. I told that bitch she never comes between me and my friends. Can I sleep in your guest bedroom, buddy? I'm starting this over, man. Hell yeah.

Hell yeah. Yeah, we did it. Just us boys now. Just, yeah, more dudes. More dudes. More dudes. More dudes. Isn't that awesome? That's the premise of the movie Love You Man.

With Jason Segel and Paul Rudd. Is that the premise? Yeah, the guy doesn't have many male friends and there's a wedding coming up, so they set him up with a guy to become friends with. Are you thinking Amistad? Yes, that's what's all about friendship. That's what it was. The true meaning of Amistad is friendship. Forcibly making people be your friend. That's your concept of slavery? Yeah.

You will be my friend. Hey, we have a kickball league. It's mandatory. I think they were doing a little more than making them be their friends. You and I shall get to know each other. We got an employee of the month board. Yes. I gave him pizza on Friday. Mm-hmm. Hell yeah. I'm giving you a career. Save on Cox Internet when you add Cox Mobile and get fiber-powered internet at home and unbeatable 5G reliability on the go.

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